#n That Dinner. that was the final blow. i was so overwhelmed i got lost on the way home | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

marvelouspeterparker · 3 years

Text

professor’s sweetheart

pairing: professor!tom holland x student!reader

summary: professor holland teaches british literature at your university. you hadn’t expected much when you signed up for the course, but the experience is everything and more than you could have hoped for.

word count: 15.1k

warnings: there is smut in here but it’s not the main focus (wild, i know)

notes: uh yeah i’d say just don’t fuck your professor? this is purely fictional. be safe, you know how it is <3

also she wrote a professor!harry styles fic, but if i hadn’t read that (over and over) i probably wouldn’t have been inspired to write this. so check out @songbirdstyles !

i listened to this playlist while writing it if ur interested :)

give me feedback please!!

“What class do you have next?” Your friend, and roommate Liz asked. You were both walking out of the cafeteria. It was 1:15, you had just finished lunch and you had fifteen minutes until your next class. You pushed the doors open together and braced yourselves as the cool late September breeze hit you, blowing your jackets open. You put both sides of the jacket together in front of you and crossed your arms to block the cold out.

“Um,” you thought back for a moment, the cold temporarily knocking your senses right out of you. “British Literature.”

If you were being honest, you had taken this course because it fulfilled one of your requirements, but in the end it felt like one of the most rewarding parts of your college experience so far. The material was interesting, and instead of being bored out of your mind throughout the whole hour and a half of class––it was actually entertaining. You had your professor to thank for that.

“Oooh,” Liz twisted her lips to the side to suppress a knowing smile, but the look in her eyes gave it away. “With Professor Holland?” She asked, batting her eyelashes innocently.

You rolled your eyes and bit your tongue to hide your smile. “Yes,” you shoved her playfully to the side making her step in a pile of leaves, the crunch under boots loud as ever as it carried through the crisp air. “Shut up.”

You and Liz had been roommates since your first year at university and had now spent four, coming up on five semesters rooming together. Luckily, you really hit it off, and easily fell into a routine together, forming a bond as you ate lunch and dinner together, studied in the library, had dance parties in your dorm, and more. You knew each other inside and out, often having random late night conversations while you procrastinated your work or couldn’t sleep, about literally anything and everything. Bottom line is, you trusted each other, which is why she knew about your sort-of-crush on Professor Holland.

To be fair everyone had a thing for him, he was just that kind of guy. He was sweet and compassionate and funny. Professor Holland was one of those genuine professors who sincerely cared about their students and their well-beings. He was incredibly understanding. He’d schedule dozens of meetings with his students all in one day just because he wanted to help and make sure they were all alright. He liked to check in every now and then, not because he had to, but because he wanted to.

From what you could tell he also seemed like a people person. No matter who he was with, whether it was a student, his teaching assistant Jacob, or his fellow professors––he was always attentive, cracking jokes, enjoying the conversation. Everyone seemed to love him. But you could also tell that a part of him was just a tad bit cocky, but in a joking and love-able way.

All this goes to show that you spent way too much time thinking about him, and observing him, which could either be seen as really endearing or really creepy.

“Look I’m just saying,” Liz shrugged, “Enjoy the class.” She nudged you, “I know I would.”

Realizing you were approaching the writing and arts center, and Liz’s next class was in the building across the street, you sent her off. “Yeah yeah, okay. Bye.” You tightened your arms around you and scurried off, skipping a crack in the sidewalk and walking up the steps to the building. You opened the door and were immediately welcomed by a rush of warm air and let out a sigh, rubbing your hands together as you made your way to the lecture hall.

You pulled your phone out and checked the time, 1:22. You still had 8 minutes to spare. You were still walking and only glanced up from your phone right as you were about to walk into the door and were stopped suddenly when you crashed into a hard chest. You immediately felt two warm hands grasp your arms to steady you and were suddenly enveloped by the smell of tea and mint.

“Woah! I’m sorry, love, are you alright?”

You froze as you looked up, feeling very much like a deer in headlights as you realized you quite literally crashed into your professor. “Oh––um,” you swallowed, suddenly feeling like the air was escaping you. You cleared your throat trying to save yourself from anymore embarrassment. “I’m fine––I’m sorry, that was my fault. I wasn’t looking––” You paused when you noticed the small smile on his face, his warm eyes making you forget what you were going to say.

“It’s alright, Y/N. It was partially my fault as well, I was too focused on––” he seemed to snap out of some trance, straightening himself up as his hands dropped back down to his sides and into his pockets. “Uh, well that’s not important.” He pulled one hand out of his pocket––he was wearing those blue slacks that you thought made his thighs look great, respectfully, of course. He checked the time on his watch and you had to stop yourself from ogling the veins in his arms as he did so.

He looked up at you, brows furrowed playfully and you actually had to remind yourself to breathe. “You’re almost ten minutes early. You that eager to see me?” He ended his question with a teasing smirk and your mouth opened and closed a few times before you managed to string together a response.

“I––um, I just really like this class and you––you’re my favorite professor.” You blurted out, your cheeks heating up as you realized what you just admitted. You had to force your eyes to go back to their normal size after they practically bulged at the realization of what you said. “And I mean, I just happened to get here early so...I thought I might as well get settled in.”

Your professor cleared his throat, trying to hide his smile as he glanced down at his shoes for a moment then back up at you. “Well then.” He extended his arm, pointing towards the open door of the hall and stepped aside. “Please, after you.”

You gave him a small smile in return along with a quiet thank you and stepped through the door. But before you could walk over to your seat, you felt him lean over behind you to talk lowly in your ear. He was standing a respectably close distance, but his presence was so overwhelming it was as though you felt him everywhere. His breath caressed the smooth skin of your cheek as he spoke.

“I’m technically not allowed to have favorites, but I do appreciate that you enjoy having me as your professor, darling.” It shouldn’t have had such an effect on you, really, it shouldn’t have. But something about him referring to himself by his title really did something to you. You took a sharp inhale as you stood up straight, your whole body on high alert as you turned your head towards him, your eyes refusing to look at his and instead finding solace in the fabric of his navy blue button up––which he’d rolled up to his forearms.

“And if it means anything, I rather do enjoy having you in my class as well.” You snuck a peek at him, lifting your gaze slowly and only caught a glimpse of his soft lips as he smiled before walking over to his desk.

You felt your heart pounding in your chest as you walked up the steps to your usual spot in the middle row, near the aisle. Your legs felt like they were going to give out any minute, and the man hadn’t even touched you––well not in the way you wanted him to, anyway. But enough of that.

You checked your phone again, trying to calm down your heartbeat as you took in a deep breath, 1:28. People started shuffling into the class, the overlapping sounds of chatter and laughter rupturing the energy the room had when it was just the two of you. At 1:32 Professor Holland started the class, getting everyone’s attention smoother than anyone should be able to. You could almost feel everyone’s eyes focusing on him, some weren’t even listening to him, they were just so entranced by how good he looked and the way he sounded––his accent was just so endearing, you had to admit it.

The hour and a half went by rather quickly but today you were more aware of yourself, of Professor Holland––even more than usual. It seemed as though his eyes would travel to your direction more often, after he made jokes as if to see your reaction, or while he paused in his speeches.

At the end of the class, despite there being dozens of other students moving around you, you felt as though your professor was watching you as you made your way out of the room. But it had to be your imagination, there was just no way.

When you got back to your dorm, Liz still wasn’t back yet so you decided to take a shower and spend some time relaxing. You had already done your work for the next day and your other work for the rest of the week––well, you decided you’d do it later.

You changed into sweats after your shower and hopped on your bed, deciding to switch between your apps for an hour or so––honestly you’d lost track of time. Liz strolled in soon after, closing the door with a loud groan, throwing her bag on the floor.

You smiled, looking up at her from your lying position on the bed. “Hello to you too.”

She grumbled in response, finally looking at you. When she noticed you were already wearing your pajamas she pointed to you, her brows raised. “Good idea!” She immediately went to her drawers and picked out a random pair of sweats and an oversized sweatshirt, changing with lightning speed for someone who was sluggishly groaning not even a minute before.

She grabbed her phone and sat on her bed opposite yours, cross-legged, facing you. She looked at your face for a few seconds before squinting her eyes at you. “You have something to say. Spill.”

You rolled your eyes, a smile on your face.

She looked at you pointedly, “Well go on.”

So you told her about your encounter with the infamous brit today, how you bumped into him, what he said to you, the glances he sent your way. When you finished recounting everything you took a deep breath, “But––this could all just be in my head you know, just me overreacting.”

She stared at you with a dead expression. “Are you fucking dumb?”

“Hey!”

She ignored you, rolling her eyes while she tried not to laugh. “Dude he totally wants to fuck you.” She said nonchalantly.

Your eyes bulged, “W–What do you––What?”

“Oh please, it’s so obvious.”

You opened your mouth but when nothing came out, you paused and looked down at the carpet. After a few moments you looked back up at her to find her with a knowing smirk on her face. “Are you serious?”

“Of course I am, when am I not?” When you were about to speak, she interrupted you. “Don’t answer that. But look, it seems like he’s into you. I think you should hit that.”

“But we––that’s not allowed!” You paused, “Is it?”

She laughed, “A ha! So you do want to!”

“Oh shut up, you already knew that. Everyone wants to, it’s not a big deal.”

She made a face, “Yes, but you’re the only one who actually has a chance at getting it.”

You looked at her, a skeptical look on your face. “Even if that was true––he’s still my professor…”

She sighed, rolling her eyes. “Yeah but it’s not like it’s in the handbook or anything. Plus, you’re both legal adults, so. There you have it. You’re free to bone.”

“You did not just say that.”

“But I did.” She smiled, lying down in her bed. “You really could, though. Just don’t tell anybody.” When you didn’t say anything else, she spoke up. “Okay I’m gonna take a nap now. You have a lot to think about.”

You ignored the last part and went back to your phone, “Yeah you do that.”

Throughout the rest of the afternoon and night you couldn’t stop thinking about this whole situation. This was bad...Or was it? It seemed all too complicated, that was for sure. You weren’t even sure he looked at you or thought of you that way.

You fell asleep playing all the pros and cons of hypothetically getting with him, your mind an endless loop of your professor, his voice, how he sounded when he practically whispered that he liked being your teacher. This was all too much.

❊❊❊❊

All of your senses were in overdrive. All you could feel were the hands tracing every curve of your body, playing you like a toy they’d made themselves. The tongue, teeth and lips following and leaving marks everywhere the hands traced. All you could hear was that sweet, rough voice telling you praises and calling you endearing names as your whole body shivered from the pleasure. Your eyes locked in on the ones staring up at you with pure hunger and awe as you ground yourself down on his cock.

“That’s it darling, just like that. You’re doing so good for me.” His lips curved into that oh so familiar smirk. “I taught you well, didn’t I?”

You woke up sweaty, your shirt sticking to your torso, a wet patch on your panties, your nipples pebbled in the cool air of your dorm room. A sex dream. Of course you had a fucking sex dream about him. Fuck. You were just lucky that your next class with him was on Thursday so you didn’t have to see him today. Because that would not help you at all.

You checked the time on your phone, squinting at the brightness before turning it all the way down, 10am. You got out of bed with a groan and took your toiletries bag and your towel to the bathroom, deciding to take a shower this morning, instead of later on at night. Lord knows you certainly needed one. A cold one too.

You were frustrated, frustrated with yourself for feeling this way about your professor––sure, he was only a few years older than you, but it was the principle of the matter––frustrated that you were overthinking this entire thing, and most importantly you were annoyed because you were extremely horny.

When you got into the bathroom, you locked the door and set your stuff down. You put your hands on both sides of the sink and looked at yourself in the mirror. Who are we and what happened? You sighed and grabbed your toothbrush, brushing your teeth quickly and aggressively, since everything seemed to be a hassle this morning. You’d hoped that once you hopped in the shower, you’d calm down.

When you made your way inside, you sighed contently at the feeling of the warm water pattering against your skin, freshening you up immediately. Your nipples were still hard, between your legs still wet. So you brought a hand down between your thighs, the other to your breast as you stood under the water––almost as though the water was washing away the sinful act and thoughts right at the source. You laughed at the thought, nope, nothing can wash this away.

You squeezed your breast and tugged at your nipple, rubbing your sensitive bud just the way you liked. You were still sensitive from...your dream, so it didn’t take long for everything to build up. You couldn’t help yourself, your mind brought back the remnants of last night that you remembered, the way his hands gripped you when he steadied you, the way his arms looked, and you came with a whimper that was louder than you would have liked. You bit your lip, closing your eyes and resting your head back on the tiles as the water continued to fall on you.

When you came back to your dorm, Liz was on her way out but she stopped, raising her brows at you, “So have you come to a conclusion?”

You walked past her into the dorm, “Go to class, Liz.” You heard her cackle down the hallway as you closed the door.

You got dressed casually, not rushing since there was nowhere for you to go and decided to go to the local cafe near the school. You needed to clear your head and get some work done, and you definitely would not get any of it done in your dorm. Not today, anyway.

You checked the weather and seeing that it was a little warmer today, you put a sweatshirt on, grabbed your bag along with your phone and your laptop and you were on your way. The breeze felt refreshing this morning as you stepped out of your dorm. Your walk to the cafe was only ten or so minutes but it felt good.

Stepping into the little shop, you were immediately hit by the aroma of coffee and sweets, surrounded by the sound of light chatter and utensils clattering on the wooden tables. The warm light above you brought a sense of comfort as you made your way over to the counter. The line was rather short so you managed to order your usual drink and snack quickly. As you were waiting for the cashier to hand you your things, your eyes scanned the shop––the ambience was rather nice and the talking almost felt like background noises. You wouldn’t mind staying here to work.

As you gathered your things, you turned around in search of a free table––which would be the deciding factor in whether or not you would stay, you did not want to awkwardly share the small table space with some stranger. You took a few steps into the seating area and almost choked on your breath when you made eye contact with the last person you wanted to see today.

He smiled charmingly at you, teeth and all and quickly made his way over before you even had a chance to think of escaping. “Y/N!” He stood in front of you, his eyes bright. He was actually happy to see you? He was always happy to see everyone, it didn’t mean anything.

His voice snapped you out of your annoyingly loud thoughts. “Fancy seeing you here.” He nudged you playfully, “How are you?” He was wearing a very tight white button up that was unbuttoned until the third, showing a generous amount of his chest, a grey suit and pants, along with a messenger bag slung over his shoulder. It took you a few more seconds than it should have to process that there were actual words coming out of his mouth.

You forced a smile onto your face but the more you looked into his eyes, the more genuine it became, almost impossible to wipe off. “I’m good. Was just grabbing breakfast before I start my work. You?”

He raised his cup, “Same as you. Have a bit of time before my next class.”

You noticed that you couldn’t tell what exactly was in the cup and your curiosity got the better of you. You pointed to the cup clasped in his fingers, “Is that coffee?”

He furrowed his brows in mock offense, “I only drink tea, darling.” He leaned his upper body forward to whisper to you, his cheek almost touching yours, “I’d think you would know that about your favorite professor.” He tutted playfully as he stood up straight again, watching you, a look that you couldn’t quite pinpoint in his eyes as he watched you over his cup, taking a teasingly long sip.

You looked up at him, your mouth slightly open, not a clue what to respond. When he pulled the cup away from his mouth he looked down at you, his gaze drifting down and you’d never felt more exposed, despite the fact that you were wearing two layers of clothing. “I like your sweatshirt.” He smiled, glancing down at it before looking directly into your eyes, his head lowered slightly.

Your eyes widened in surprise and your head snapped down to see your spiderman sweatshirt looking back at you boldly. Oh––Oh. You lifted your head back up to find him still smiling at you softly, he didn’t seem to be teasing you at all. “Um thanks.” You could feel your cheeks heating up, despite the cool air that swept your legs as someone opened the door to the cafe. “Are you uh–– a marvel fan?”

He pursed his lips playfully, “Yeah,” his hand came up to rub the back of his neck, “Yeah you could say that.” He licked his lips and took another sip of his drink.

Your eyes, with a mind of their own, trailed down the column of his throat, following the vein on the side of his neck, the way his adams apple bobbed as he swallowed the warm liquid. The action almost seemed provocative, in both meanings of the term.

Suddenly you felt very hot and you knew that you had to get out of there before you made a fool of yourself in front of everyone, but most importantly him. You perked up, “I uh––I have to go professor, but it was nice talking with you. See you tomorrow!” With that you quite literally ran off, wincing as you turned around, having noticed the way his lips parted as if to speak, a furrow between his brows appearing out of confusion and concern. You really had to get control of yourself.

You practically berated yourself as you speed walked away. God, that was so stupid. And not to mention, incredibly rude! He’d probably be upset with you now, or maybe even mad. It’s just––unbelievable what he did to you, without even actually doing anything. It took you the entire walk there to realize that you unconsciously made your way back to your dorm––so much for the library. But you’d had enough social interaction for today, so you decided you’d stay there.

You got in your bed and buried yourself under the covers, deciding you needed the comfort of being hidden in your mattress after the embarrassment you’d just experienced. You lied there just staring at the plain, white ceiling for way too long until you let out a loud huff and sat up, before grabbing your computer to start your work.

Deciding to check your college email before you started, since they were incessant and it was easy to miss something, you scanned down the list of messages in your inbox. Your eyes skimmed through the boxes on the left of your screen, notifications that your professors left feedback on your assignments, the weekly newsletter, club events, a message from Holland, Tom––

You shut your computer immediately, eyes bulging as you held your breath. You swallowed thickly, as you stared into nothing in front of you, your eyes barely taking in anything, your mind a big ball of fuzz.

After taking a few deep breaths, and telling your overdramatic brain to calm down, you opened the laptop again. Biting your lip, you hovered your mouse over the message, reading over the small bits of information you could see in the preview.

Holland, Tom

Just checking in

Hi Y/N, I just wanted to make …

You could feel your heart beating through your chest. Oh God––Wanted to make sure what?? The sensible part of your brain said to just open it to figure it out for yourself. But the irrational, idiotic part of your brain was yelling at you to not open it under any circumstance. What if he wanted to make sure you didn’t get the wrong idea? Did he know how you felt about him? Were you that obvious? Maybe he thinks you’re clinically insane and wants to make sure you’re getting the attention you need? You did run off like a crazy person, after all.

You shut your eyes tight and groaned loudly into your hands. Liz walked in and whistled lowly, taking in everything in front of her. You looked up, confused and looked at the time, realizing it had already been two hours since you first left the dorm, meaning she was done with her classes for the day.

“What’s up?” She took a seat at her desk, propping her legs on the table as she leaned back.

You waved her off, deciding it would be best to let this blow over and ignore it for now. You’d go back when you were in the right state of mind.

She started telling you about her day and annoyingly, your brain decided today would be the day that it would not shut off. Your brows were furrowed as you tried your best to focus on what your friend was saying, but she wasn’t even looking in your direction, staring up into the air above her as she spoke animated, hands waving around, so she didn’t even notice you struggling to pay attention.

Your eyes kept flitting back to the screen of your computer, your fingers swiping across the trackpad to turn it back on when the screen’s brightness lowered every now and then.

Liz looked back at you and stopped her spiel. “Alright what’s up with you?”

You sighed deeply and looked up at her. “Sorry, sorry. I just––I saw Professor Holland today––”

“Already?” She interrupted you, a goofy smile on her face. “Damn, you work fast.”

You threw the nearest pillow at her, “Shut up! I didn’t fuck him.”

“You should’ve.” She pointed out, holding the pillow to her chest.

You glared at her until she raised her hands in surrender, then continued, your eyes bouncing from object to object in the room as you babbled.

“I went to the cafe and I saw him and he came over to me and we started talking––and he whispered in my ear and he was joking around with me and he sipped his tea and he was super close to me and super hot, and I couldn’t handle it so I basically ran off without giving him a chance to say bye.” You took a deep breath, “And then he sent me an email after I saw him and I still haven’t opened it because I’m scared and I don’t know what he said…” You took another breath and looked at your friend, blinking as she just stared at you.

After a moment, she spoke up. “Dude just open the email.”

Your eyes widened almost in offense. “Did you not listen to anything I just said?”

“Yeah you practically fucked in the cafe then you got scared and ran away.” She spoke nonchalantly and you could tell she was fighting off a smile. “Look, eventually you have to open the email anyway, you can’t just ignore it. So just do it and rip the bandaid off.” You were about to speak up when she interrupted you, “I promise it won’t be half as bad as you think. We both know your mind is absolutely filled with the craziest ideas.”

You huffed and fell back down on the bed, not bothering to argue since you both knew she was right.

“Shit, I’m starving.” She looked at the time, “Yeah it’s about time for me to eat food.” She stood up, “Come on, let’s go.”

“Can you please get something for me?” She knew you well enough that you didn’t have to tell her what to get. You gave her your best smile and shrugged your shoulders.

“Are you serious.” She looked at you, deadpan, standing like the little emoji of the woman standing in place with her arms at her sides.

You had to suppress your smile, “What if I see him?” You asked incredulously, lying further in the covers. “I’d rather stay in here and hide, for now.”

“You have class with him tomorrow––”

“That’s why I said for now.”

She cracked a smile, rolling her eyes as she grabbed her things, “You’re ridiculous.”

“Love you!”

“Yeah yeah,” she waved her hand and walked out the door.

A few moments passed after Liz left and you sat up yet again, putting your computer on your lap as you swiped the trackpad, making the screen light up again. You checked the time, it had been almost an hour since he sent the email, you really shouldn’t make him wait any longer. Not that he’s waiting at all, he probably didn’t even notice that you hadn’t responded.

You inhaled and exhaled slowly, swallowed your nerves and clicked on the email.

Holland, Tom

Just checking in

Hi Y/N,

I just wanted to make sure everything was alright. You seemed kind of stressed when you left earlier and I’m hoping it wasn’t because of anything I did. Can we check in tomorrow in my office? Hope everything is going well.

Warmest Regards,

Professor Holland

He wanted to meet tomorrow after class. In his office. Alone.

Oh, fuck. You could hear Liz in your head going Yes, fuck. But you quickly shoved her aside.

You read over the email about five times to make sure you weren’t misinterpreting anything, because that would be even more embarrassing. You clicked the reply button and slowly wrote out your response.

Hi Professor Holland,

Everything is fine, but thank you for asking, I appreciate the concern. I’m free tomorrow after class if you’re available then.

Thank you!

Y/N

You hit send and not even two minutes later, you received a response.

Hi Y/N,

Perfect! I’ll see you then :)

Warmly,

Professor Holland

How on earth were you supposed to focus on your work now? More importantly, how were you going to focus in class tomorrow?

❊❊❊❊

The next day, the butterflies in your stomach would not calm down. When you stepped into the class, he was talking to another student and you tried to sneak past to your seat unnoticed. You thought you’d succeeded but once you sat down and looked up, you made direct eye contact with him and you swear you stopped breathing. You barely even recognized the sound of everyone moving around you, getting ready for class to start.

He parted his lips and reluctantly turned back to the student still talking to him, snapping out of his daze, but not after glancing back at you. You swallowed and sank down in your seat. This was going to be a long class.

At 1:35, class started. Professor Holland stood up and clasped his hands, making his way to the middle of the floor in front of everybody, his voice reverberating through the room.

“Good afternoon everybody. Hope you’re all doing well.” His eyes found yours and you bit your lip nervously. You could see him swallow as he watched you, before moving his gaze elsewhere. Was that because of you? Surely, it had to be a coincidence. Maybe you made him uncomfortable. Oh great––

He went on, seemingly unfazed, eyes darting back to you subtly before continuing. The discussion soon turned to the book you’d just been assigned to read. The book was rather lengthy but there were always so many things to talk about within only a few pages––which you loved, so it was taking you all a while to go through everything together in class.

The conversations often took up a lot of the class time since Professor Holland simply loved talking and he always found everyone’s interpretations interesting and worth exploring––eager to hear our classmates perspectives. He also often said that he was not good at using technology, so he preferred to just talk and show rather than use his computer. Honestly, you found it endearing.

The conversations were always interesting to listen to, people never failed to give you insight on things you hadn’t even thought of before, but sometimes––some people were just a little stupid.

Someone brought up a slightly sexist point that made absolutely no sense but since you weren’t the one to call someone out in front of a room full of people, you stuck to your facial reactions instead of audibly responding. You turned back to the front of the class to see Professor Holland’s opinion to find that he was watching you, trying and failing to suppress his smile.

He put both hands in his pockets which you found ironic considering they would jump out any time soon––he loved to talk with his hands. His eyes got serious, the smile on his face a little less friendly as he addressed the sophomore who made the comment. “I don’t know if you’re aware of how ludicrously sexist that comment you just made was, but now you know.” He turned to the rest of the class. “Remember to think before you speak. This isn’t to necessarily call anyone out. It’s a warning. Senseless remarks will not only affect my view of you, but your grades as well.”

He went on and tried to shape the boy’s comment into something appropriate to discuss and you honestly couldn’t focus on anything else he said, you were just looking at him in awe and in shock. Sure, this was the bare minimum, but since it was so rare to see, it was very noticeable and even impressive when you noticed it.

God, you adored this man.

Near the end of class, he announced the next assignment, a paper you’d have to write about a comparison you made between any point in the story, a character, a theme, a hidden meaning, etc. and something in our modern reality, a social norm, a popular belief, etc. Your essays were always very open ended in this class, giving you room to write about almost anything you wanted to. Your professor knew that the assignments would be more enjoyable if there was some choice involved. He truly was good at his job.

“Look, reading’s hard sometimes, I get it. I’m dyslexic, so trust me, I understand. But I never let that stop me.” He paused to look around the room and it was so silent you could hear each other’s inhales and exhales. The power he had over a room full of around one hundred people was insane, and in a weird way, also turned you on. “I know the book is massive. Listen to the audio books if you have to, I don’t mind. But get the work done either way. It’s not for me, it’s for you. I want you to get the best grade you can in this class.”

“Bring me interesting material. I don’t want to fall asleep reading your work.” He joked and smiled proudly when laughter filled the room. “The essay is due in two weeks. Good luck.”

There were a few thank you’s and goodbyes scattered around the room as he sent everyone off, people scurrying from all sides to the exits.

You took your time gathering all your things and took a deep breath when the last few people made their way out, silence soon surrounding the both of you. You put your bag over your shoulder and walked down the carpeted steps, suddenly finding the dark grey pattern to be the most interesting things you’ve ever seen––and also watching your steps so that you don’t fall down them in front of him. You could barely hear the soft patter of your shoes as you walked down. When you finally got the main floor you looked up and saw him waiting for you patiently, things in his hands, a smile on his face.

“Let’s go then, shall we?” You nodded shyly and he led the way, his office only a hallway away from the lecture hall. You found it slightly odd that he didn’t try to make conversation on your way there, since he always loved to. But you tried not to think too hard about it. Maybe he was just tired.

When you reached his office, he opened the door and let you walk in first. Your eyes immediately scanned the room out of curiosity as you stepped inside, noticing his desk, the wood a dark mahogany which was covered with stacks of papers, picture frames, pens, and a few marvel funko pops––so he really was a fan. You’d never actually been inside of his office before. It was an intimidating thought for you to be in his office with him, alone. You just didn’t want to embarrass yourself.

You turned to him and gestured to the chair across from his desk, “Do I just––”

“Please,” he interrupted eagerly. “Make yourself comfortable.”

You took a seat and he set his things down next to his desk before sitting as well. His hair was coiffed to perfection today, curls sculpted nicely, a dark blue suit on his body with a black shirt underneath. He took off the suit jacket and put it on the back of his chair and you could see his veins and muscles bulging and shifting in his arms as he moved. He clasped his hands in front of him on the desk and wow he had nice fingers. You really had to get a grip on yourself––

“How was class today for you? Well, besides that one disappointing comment.”

You smiled, “I always enjoy the class, but yeah that was uh, disappointing as you said.

“I think your interpretations are always very insightful and very interesting. It’s almost a shame that you don’t share them with the whole class but part of me likes it that we keep them between us.” Oh? “Plus, I know how scary it can be talking in front of all those people. I almost shit myself first time I taught that class––”

You let out a surprised laughter and he couldn’t help laugh as well.

“Shit, sorry! I mean––” He sighed, “Language, sorry. I’m British.” He shrugged, “Can’t help it.”

You shook your head, “It’s okay. Personally I think curse words spice up conversations.” You smiled proudly when he laughed at your joke.

His smile radiated a more nervous energy after his laughter died off. “When you ran off yesterday, that wasn’t––was that because of me? Because if I did something to make you uncomfortable I’m so sorry.”

You tilted your head, trying to think of a way to explain. “No it wasn’t, well––it kind of was?” You had no idea why you would tell him this, but apparently your mouth was moving without agreeing with your mind first.

There was almost a pout on his face and you had the sudden urge to reach over the table and smooth it out with your lips. “It’s just, well––You make me just a little bit nervous, to be honest professor.” You looked down at your lap and back up at him timidly.

He raised his brows, “Oh––”

Your smile was strained and you wanted nothing more than to be swallowed whole by the floor.

“Well that’s not a bad thing, is it?” He looked at you almost, hopefully?

You laughed, “No trust me, it’s not.” Your eyes widened at the realization of what you’d basically just admitted to him and you didn’t know if you should feel embarrassed or relieved when the smirk appeared on his face.

But the words that he uttered next cleared that up for you. “Well, if I’m honest, you make me nervous too, darling. And definitely not in a bad way.” He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, almost teasing you with how good he looked.

You licked your lips, your mouth suddenly feeling dry, crossing your legs, your thighs squeezing together, and he definitely noticed, his eyes trailing down your body as he licked his lips as well.

The tension in the room was so thick but you found that you didn’t want to escape it, if anything you wanted to carve your way through it, stay for as long as you could until it snapped.

Your professor spread his legs, his hands coming down to rub at his thighs as he watched you and the sound of your heartbeat pounding filled your ears. It was almost as if there was an unseen force pulling the two of you together, but before it could there was a knock at the door.

The both of your heads snapped to the door to find it opening slowly. Jacob, Tom’s teaching assistant popped his head in. You had talked to him a few times, he was always very nice. He didn’t attend every class, but you guessed that he would be attending the next one. “Hey man.” He turned to you and smiled, “Oh hi Y/N.” You waved and let out a small hi in response. He turned back to the professor. “Your next class is starting like––” He looked at his watch. “Now.”

“Shit, sorry man. Lost track of time.” He got up and you did too, smiling sheepishly as you grabbed your things, getting up from your seat. “I’ll be right there.” Jacob nodded and closed the door.

You both made your way over to the exit slowly, still reeling from what maybe could have happened and what you both obviously thought of. The silence was loud around you, but it wasn’t scary this time.

“Let me know if you need any help with the upcoming assignment, alright? Don’t be afraid to stop by if you need to.” His gaze dropped down to your lips for a split second before reaching your eyes again. “For anything.” He looked at you with an expression you couldn’t describe but quickly tried to mask it with a smile as he opened the door for you, his eyes practically holding yours captive.

“Thank you, professor. I will.”

You stepped out and he watched you for a few moments before closing the door. You looked back, smiling as you caught his eye and as soon as he stepped back in the office, you practically ran out of the building and to your dorm, a stupid grin on your face.

“Holy shit.”

❊❊❊❊

When you practically burst into your dorm room, scaring Liz half to death before you told her what happened, let’s just say she wasn’t surprised in the slightest.

“I fucking told you!” She flopped onto her bed, still staring at you pointedly as she did so, a smirk on her face. She pointed at you before dropping her hand down dramatically by her side. “You like, owe me a soda now or something.”

You rolled your eyes but you were so giddy the smile still hadn’t dropped from your face. “Well I do owe you for getting me lunch yesterday, so maybe I will buy you one.”

❊❊❊❊

Over the weekend, you started working on the essay for British Literature and you were already about halfway done since the topic you chose actually interested you. But you found yourself questioning if you were writing it properly as you went on. You weren’t sure if it was because you wanted it to be near perfect since you’d found out he paid extra attention to you, or maybe you just wanted to talk to him again––you’d never know.

After discussing with Liz, you decided you’d stop by his office on Monday afternoon once you were done with your classes. You knew he liked to stay in his office until late at night sometimes, he always said we could stop by whenever, if we needed something. So you decided to take advantage of that, shoving down your anxious thoughts and doing what you wanted.

Liz may or may not have convinced you to wear a shirt that was––aesthetically pleasing, to put it, specifically in the chest area so you were more than eager to see your professor’s reaction. You were a little nervous, you didn’t want it to seem like you were trying too hard, but you thought you looked good in this shirt, and you had a right to feel good about yourself. Since it was a little chilly outside, you hid it under a sweatshirt for now.

You got to his office and found yourself staring at the dark wood, hesitating to knock on. After taking a deep breath you rapped your knuckles against the door.

You heard a faint Come in! And you took a deep breath and opened the door slowly to find him sitting at his desk, “Hi Professor Holland.” He was finishing some notes on a student’s essay but his head snapped up immediately at the sound of your voice.

He dropped his pen and sat up, “Please,” he motioned to the seat across from his desk and you smiled gratefully before settling down. “What can I do for you? Everything alright?”

His eyes looked sincere and concerned and you could feel your insides melting a little bit.

“I just––I really want to do well on this essay,” He nodded for you to continue, “But I’m just not sure if I’m going in the right direction.”

He nodded understandingly, “Well let’s have a look, shall we?”

You reached down to grab your things when he stood up and walked past you, your eyes following him in confusion. He gestured to the couch, a somewhat impish smile on his face. “Just thought it would be more comfortable––and easier for us to look together, of course.”

You nodded, a small smile on your face as you picked up your bag and sat next to him on the couch. “Right, of course.” It was a loveseat so there wasn’t much room for either of you to distance yourselves.

You got out your computer and opened up the essay. You had already opened it before you got there, not wanting to have to awkwardly wait for it to load. Yes, you overthought things but––it helped sometimes. “I see you came prepared,” he joked and you couldn’t help but smile. He really did notice everything, didn’t he.

“Well I’m really confident about the topic of my essay, I think it’s interesting. But I feel like I may be adding too much into the paper, and I’m not sure if I’m overthinking things or if I should take some things out.”

“I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think. I meant it when I said I appreciate having you in my class, you know. I always love reading your work. You write well.”

“Thank you, professor.” Though you saw his eyes darken at the title, he commented on it.

“You can call me Tom when we’re alone, darling. No need for formalities.”

“But I like calling you professor––” Your hand shot up to cover your mouth and you spoke before he could, ignoring his smile, “I mean um. Tom––Okay I can try that.”

His tongue passed under his teeth, a devilish smirk on his face as he watched you squirm under his gaze. “No you know, now I think professor is growing on me.”

You pursed your lips, rolling your eyes. “Prof––Tom.”

He raised his hands in surrender, “Alright alright.”

“Why don’t you read it to me? It’s easier to see where you can improve when you hear it out loud.”

You swallowed nervously, nodding your head as you brought your laptop closer to you. “O––Okay.”

You started reading your paper out loud, voice becoming slightly steadier as you went on, two fingers scrolling up the trackpad. He made comments as you read, only praise––and with each compliment you felt yourself getting hotter. Very good. Always write so well. Nice point there. Mhm. Good girl, that’s an excellent point. He shifted his way closer to you gradually as you read on and when his thigh touched yours, you had to tell yourself not to jump from the contact.

He placed his arm on the back of the couch, basically around your shoulder and you had to smush down the urge to throw your computer and climb into his lap. His thighs did look very inviting with the way he was sitting, though.

He moved closer to you and you could feel his breath cascading down over your shoulder as he brought his hand to the trackpad, his arm over your thigh, fingers scrolling through to where he had a few suggestions.

When he finished his few remarks, you could hear the proud smile in his voice. “See, I knew it wouldn’t be as bad as you thought. You’re a good writer...” He paused and you turned your head slightly to find his lips mere inches from yours, his eyes trained on your mouth. His words were barely a whisper when he spoke up again, “A good student.” You both leaned in slowly and his hand came up to hold your cheek lightly. “Bet you’d be a good girl for me too.”

You gasped lightly and leaned forward, giving in and finally pressing your lips to his, both your hands grabbing his jaw. He moaned immediately, his body pressing into yours as you twisted to face him, his other hand coming around your waist to pull you in. You felt your laptop slipping off your thighs and squeaked, making the both of you laugh and pull away, flustered.

“Careful, love.” Tom grabbed the computer and put it down on the floor gently, confirming that you saved your work before pushing the lid closed.

The air in the room was hot, thanks to Tom in general, but also thanks to what you just did. So you pulled away and couldn’t help but smile at the sight of Tom’s pout when he thought you were getting up to leave. Since there wasn’t much space on the couch, you stood up to take your hoodie off and you heard his breath hitch when his eyes fell upon the shirt you were wearing. “Christ-”

“Now what’s this?” Tom said almost to himself, his eyes staring at you in wonder and awe. “Never seen this little number before.” He noticed the clothes you wore? His hands were already aching to feel you again, reaching out for you subconsciously and you bit your lip to calm your smile as you sat back down, letting your sweater fall to the floor softly.

“What, this old thing?” You joked, looking down at the shirt––yeah, you looked good. “You like it?” You looked up at him, a cheekily innocent look in your eyes.

He put his hands around your waist and pulled you into his lap, enjoying the gasp it elicited from you. You put your hands gingerly on his shoulders and the way he was looking up at you made you never want to leave this position ever again. You tilted your head and licked your lips and Tom couldn’t take it anymore, he kissed you again, hands gripping you firmly, anchoring you to him. He pulled away after a good while, wanting to look at you again, his lips parted, practically panting like an animal. You really had an effect on him, but he did the same to you.

His eyes were taking you in, basically capturing a mental image for later. “God, you look heavenly, darling.” You squirmed in his lap and bit your lip when you felt a bulge growing underneath you. He leaned forward and left a trail of kisses on the tops of your breasts, leaving a few teasing nips and sucks here and there. You squealed, your hands coming up to run your fingers through his hair. You pulled his head up by his hair and the look in his eyes looked absolutely feral––like he wanted to eat you.

You were about to lean in and kiss him again when a knock at the door surprised the both of you. You both jumped off of the couch as Tom threw out excuses. “Yeah just a second!” You straightened out your shirt as Tom did the same to his pants and you picked up your things.

When he saw that you were settled, he took a deep breath and answered the door. His colleague and best friend Professor Osterfield, was standing there, a grin on his face. “You div, are you ever going to be on time for our monthly meetings?––” He stood up straight when he noticed you standing behind Tom. “Oh, I didn’t know you had company.” He looked between the two of you and it seemed as though he pieced everything together. Maybe Tom had told him about you? If he did, you wouldn’t be worried Tom didn’t seem like the type to tell unreliable people his business––and they were best friends after all.

You smiled at him in acknowledgement as moved aside to let you pass. “Sorry,” you looked between the both of them, “I’ll let you get to whatever you have to go to.” You looked at Tom once you were out of his office, “Thank you for the feedback, professor.”

You could see him fighting off his smirk before he replied, “Of course.” His stare was impenetrable as he looked at you, “Feel free to come by whenever.” You could see the hidden meaning in his words and let the hint of a smile show, before nodding and walking off.

Harrison looked at him, a pitiful smile on his face. “I hope you know what you’re doing, mate. You should be careful, for the both of you.”

Tom sighed, not wanting to have this conversation. “I know, man. Let’s go.”

❊❊❊❊

You found yourself missing Tom as soon as you left. God, this was kind of pathetic. But at least your feelings weren’t necessarily one sided––he did say you made him nervous too after all. You doubt he’d say that if he just wanted to fuck you––he was better than most men. And sure you might be a little biased, but at the end of the day he had a good heart and he was educated. So bonus.

When you stepped into your dorm, your roommate was sitting on her bed, snacks in hand as she looked at you expectantly. “Now these,” she gestured to the food on her bed, “are either for a story time, to rebuild your energy or both.”

You laughed and changed into your pajamas, starting to tell your best friend about everything that just happened. She often interrupted with her reactions and comments.

Oh. My. God.

Shut. Up.

You’re fucking lying!

“But we didn’t fuck.”

“Boo––”

“Yes, boo.” You laughed, “Professor Osterfield knocked at the door and dragged him off to a meeting so.” You shrugged.

“Professor Osterfield...is that the hot blond one?” You nodded and she continued expressing her feelings for the man. “I’d let him teach me a few things––”

“Literally bye.”

She laughed, “What? Come on have you seen him––”

“I’m a little preoccupied with another professor to be honest.”

She nodded, handing you a bag of chips as you settled in your bed. “True. And oh how lucky you are.” You smiled in agreement.

❊❊❊❊

Today was the day the essay was due and though you normally handed it in at the beginning of class, for once, you didn’t and you could feel Tom’s gaze following you as you walked up the steps to your seat without so much as a glance in his direction. You’d stopped by his office a few times over the past two weeks since Harrison interrupted you, but you never did anything more than kissing and grinding. You were both too scared of getting caught, but that doesn’t mean you hadn’t thought about doing more in there.

Tom liked to have physical copies of the essays, just in case technology decides it’s against him (his words), so everyone had until 8pm tonight to drop it off by his office. You were definitely going to use that to your advantage.

You didn’t wear anything provocative to class, you didn’t really want that kind of attention today, plus you knew that Tom’s interest in you wasn’t solely based on your appearance. So you put the revealing items on under your clothing. And honestly, the thought that no one knew what you were wearing underneath it all only excited you even further.

You crossed your legs, relieving your tension and biting your lip as class went on, enjoying how flustered Tom would be every time he looked at you. You felt so submissive when you were alone with him, but when you were in public like this? Free to tease him subtly from a distance? That’s where you had all the power.

You had him blushing and stuttering throughout the whole class, though it wouldn’t have been easy for everyone else to notice, for you it was so obvious. He kept rubbing his hands together, pacing around as his eyes darted to you every few minutes. At one point he went over to sit down at his desk, which he rarely did while teaching––and you were fairly certain it was to hide a bulge in his pants. All thanks to you.

In the middle of the class, you felt your phone vibrate in your bag and pulled it out just to see if it was an emergency. You were pleasantly surprised and could feel your whole body react when you noticed who the message was from.

Tom: Having fun, are you?

Your eyes shot up to the front of the room and you bit your lip to contain your smile when you noticed him glaring at you.

Y/N: I always have fun in this class, professor ;)

You put your phone away afterwards and focused on the class, knowing it was killing Tom that you weren’t giving him more attention. Your heart was racing and your panties had a wet patch by the time class was over. You had a feeling he was going to try to keep you after class, so you hurried up and gathered your things, sighing in relief when a few students went up to his desk to talk to him.

You smirked to yourself and headed straight for the door, your head high on your shoulders. But just as you were about two feet from the exit, Tom spoke up.

“I assume I’ll be seeing you later, Miss Y/L/N?”

You turned around, eyes slightly widening as you noticed him, the group of students near him.

He smirked slyly, “To turn in your paper, remember?” His eyes were giving you a knowing look.

You swallowed, nodding as you smiled at him innocently. “Of course, professor.” You enjoyed the way his eyes darkened only slightly, only noticeable to you. “See you then.” With that you walked out.

❊❊❊❊

You practically skipped to his office at around 7:45, before knocking at the door, four knocks in a specific pattern––the code you’d made together.

“Come in, darling!”

You walked in and quickly shut the door, a chuckle escaping you. “You know someone could hear you from the outside one day, right?”

He shrugged, “I’ll just blame it on my accent. Could call everyone darling, they don’t know any better.”

You laughed. “Okay well––Professor Holland,” you said, loving the way he looked at you when you uttered his title. “I brought this for you.” You took out the printed essay and placed it on his desk.

He pushed his chair out, his eyes following your every move as he spread his legs. “Oh is that right?”

You took the invitation and took your reserved seat in his lap, linking your arms around his neck as you looked down at him. “Mhm, still want a good grade in this class you know. You are my favorite professor after all.”

He smirked smugly, licking his lips. “And you,” he kissed your lips before pulling away briefly, “Are my favorite girl.” He brought his hands up your back and pulled you into him as he kissed you again. This time, longer and deeper, wanting to feel you as much as possible. “Teased me so much in class today.” You smiled into the kiss and he continued, “Almost wanted to take you over my knee right there in front of everyone.”

You moaned audibly and he brought his hand up to your neck, gripping you softly but firmly, giving you room to pull away if you didn’t approve. When you leaned further into his grip, he grinned and pulled you closer. You started grinding down on him, basking in the desperate groans and sighs you were coaxing out of him, the way his movements became more frantic as he bucked into you.

After debating with yourself in your head for a moment––struggling to think properly with his hands all over you, you got off of his lap and smiled at the small whines of protest he let out before reaching for his belt. You made eye contact with him and noticed how wide his eyes were, hopeful, hungry, but hesitant.

His hands reached for yours, “You don’t have to, darling. If anything I should be doing this first. God knows I’ve thought about it.”

You pouted, trying your best to ignore his words and focus on the task at hand. “But I want to,” you kissed his cheek, “I wanna make you feel good, professor.” He nodded, barely able to speak.

“Yeah? You wanna be a good girl for me?”

You nodded eagerly, licking your lips as he pulled himself out of his trousers. “More than anything. Wanna make up for earlier.” You got down on your knees, mouth practically salivating at the way his member stood tall against his abdomen, his tip leaking with precum.

Your hand wrapped around him just as a knock sounded at the door. Professor?

The both of your eyes widened, the both of you looking around for some sort of answer before he ushered you under the desk, tucking himself back in hastily, pulling his chair as much as he could and sitting at the edge, hiding his unbuttoned and unbuckled pants. Luckily for the both of you, the back of the desk reached the floor, so whoever it was wouldn’t be able to see you hiding underneath. “Uh––Come in!”

The person walked in and you recognized the sound of her voice, she often spoke up in the lectures. You couldn’t remember her name, though. You do, however, remember that she often spoke up only to get Tom’s attention. You’d heard her gush about him in the halls just outside his class in the hopes of him hearing her. You couldn’t blame her, but the thought still irked you. “I just wanted to give you my paper. I hope it’s not too late.”

Tom checked the time on his watch, 7:58. “Nope,” he laughed breathlessly, trying to compose himself, “Not too late at all, in fact just in time.”

She handed her paper to Tom and he gave her a tight-lipped smile, trying his best not to think about the fact that your hands were trailing up his thighs and that he could feel your warm breath hitting the exposed part of his member––he really hadn’t payed attention when he tucked himself back in.

Before he could send the girl who’s name you still hadn’t remembered off, she took a seat across from him and he swallowed nervously, a little frustrated since he was so close to getting his cock in his girl’s mouth.

It seemed that you somehow read his thoughts because as soon as the girl kept talking for another two minutes, you pulled his member out and stroked him, licking up his shaft and he tensed, taking every ounce of self control he had not to look down at you. His hand reached down and held your cheek gently, just wanting to feel you. You nuzzled into his palm and he had to bite his lip to suppress his smile, not wanting the student across from him to think his endearing expression was meant for her.

You honestly completely tuned out all the words she was saying, your sole focus pleasuring Tom. But you didn’t miss the flirty and falsely innocent tone in her voice. You couldn’t see her but she was no doubt batting her eyelashes at him as well.

When she made a comment about how good his shirt looked on him, you couldn’t help yourself, you sucked his tip into your mouth with no warning, making him groan unexpectedly. You paused, eyes wide and playful as your mouth stayed around him.

“Are you okay professor?”

He let out a strained smile, “Yes, Emma, Sorry––” So her name was Emma. “I just uh banged my knee on the desk.”

She hummed a small okay and went on.

He caught your eye, trying his best to keep his expression neutral, but boy was it hard. Especially when you were looking up at him like that, with his cock in your mouth. You licked around his tip and lowered your mouth around him and he had to force himself to focus on the girl who was still talking to him.

You were not playing fair but quite frankly you didn’t care. You were making him feel good and yourself too. Your hand was pumping him, your tongue swirling around him as quietly as you could, while your other hand found its place between your thighs.

In the middle of Emma’s speech, Tom’s eyes drifted down and widened, his breath getting caught in his throat when he noticed your other hand, moving between your legs. He stuttered out an excuse, unable to tear his eyes away from you for a moment, “Uh, Emma I’m so sorry––I just have so much work to do, but feel free to come back––” he paused to swallow when you sucked harder around him in reaction to his invitation. “Come back next week if you have any problems or anything else you’d like to discuss.”

She hesitantly but respectfully said goodbye and was on her way, closing the door behind her.

Tom’s hands immediately shot down to hold your head, his mouth dropped open as he watched you, approaching his high. “Shit, that’s it darling that’s it. So fucking good for me.”

“I’m gonna cum––” he warned. You simply hummed around him and sped up your movements, feeling yourself clench as he panted, his hips bucking slightly as he came into your mouth. You unfortunately weren’t able to cum but you were sure there’d be other chances. You popped off of him and swallowed his load before licking up his length teasingly slow. “Fuck, such a good girl.”

He pulled his chair out and brought you up to stand between his legs, tiling his head to look up at you, his hands rubbing up and down the backs of your thighs absentmindedly. “Was someone a little jealous?”

You shrugged, trying to act nonchalant but failing to fix your annoyed facial expression. “Maybe.”

He tucked himself back into his pants and stood up, chuckling as he squeezed your cheek. “I’m yours.” He pecked your lips, before looking in your eyes, “And I’m most definitely repaying the favor when we get home. I mean––if you want to, of course.” Home.

You couldn’t help but smile, “Yeah––Okay.”

You’d never been to Tom’s house before so this felt like sort of a big deal to you, but you were going to try and calm your racing thoughts and heart. You and Tom agreed that you would go around the corner of the building for him to pick you up in his car, not wanting to risk anyone seeing you.

As soon as you were settled in, seatbelt on, Tom drove off and honestly the thrill of having to hide was exciting to the both of you. His hand was gripping your thigh throughout the whole drive and you could tell it was meant as a reminder that he was there for you, but also that he could barely contain himself.

Seeing Tom drive you, the flashing street lights illuminating his face, highlighting his jawline, his hand gripping your thigh––this was a sight you knew you wanted to see more. The intimacy of it all made you warm inside and the feeling of Tom’s fingertips digging into your skin only riled you up further.

You leaned over to kiss his cheek and he smiled at the feeling of your soft lips drifting over his skin. “Darling––” His words were cut off by a harsh moan when you trailed your lips down to his sweet spot, the noise almost too loud for the quiet, tense air in the car.

You teased, licked and bit at his skin, not afraid to leave marks. It was Friday now, if anyone saw them on Monday, they would just assume he’d had an eventful weekend. Honestly, the thought that no one would know that you were the one who left those marks excited you––it would be a secret between you and Tom, a thing for the two of you to share on your own.

Tom’s hands were now gripping the wheel and your thigh with force, trying to get his bearings. “You’re being very naughty today, love. Can’t say that I don’t love it though.”

You smiled sinfully into his neck, continuing your actions. Your hand slid over his thigh teasingly slow to rest on his bulge, fingers squeezing ever so softly and he practically jolted in his seat. “Christ––love unless you want me to crash this car I suggest you stop.”

You pulled away, satisfied with how much you’d riled him up. He almost whined at the loss of contact, subconsciously upset that you’d actually stopped. But as your hand reached back down to find its place between your thighs, his tone shifted.

“Don’t you dare touch what’s mine. That’s my job.”

You actually felt a shiver pass through your body and you squeezed your thighs together at the sound of his dominant voice, excited for what was to come.

When you made it to his apartment, you barely had time to take in the scenery and take off your shoes and jackets before he dragged you to his room. But from what you saw, the decor was simple but elegant, much like Tom. His bedroom was the same, but again, you weren’t too focused on it.

He turned on the dim light in his room, wanting to be able to see you as he pleased you. He stepped closer to you and placed his hands on your waist, looking deep into your eyes. “You still want this?”

You nodded absolutely certain. “Want you to take me.”

His pupils dilated and he pulled your shirt up and over your head, licking his lips, eyes widening when he noticed what you were wearing and you couldn’t help but smile.

“Christ, were you wearing this all day?”

You nodded again. “The underwear’s matching too. Wanna see?”

He got down on his knees, a teasing but desperate tone to his voice. “You’re a smart girl, don’t ask stupid questions.” He unbuttoned your pants and pulled them down along with your socks, mouth dropping open as he got to see the full set.

You ran your hands up and down your body teasingly as he stood up. “Do you like it?”

He shook his head, smiling in disbelief, “Again with the silly questions, love.” He leaned in to kiss you, pulling away to take off his clothes. “You look like a goddess, darling.” You could feel your skin heating up from his words and his stare. He pulled you in for another kiss before bringing you onto the bed.

You lied down in the middle and spread your legs, waiting for him eagerly as he lied down between them. “Can’t fucking wait to taste you, love.”

He pulled your panties over to the side and licked into you, his tongue softly swiping through your folds. His eyes rolled back as he moaned into you, “Taste just as perfect as you look.” He slid his hands around your thighs and pulled you in closer, smiling at the small squeak you let out.

His tongue was exploring you, finding all the spots and all the tricks that made your toes curl and your breath hitch. He was keeping this all to memory, memorizing the way you feel, the way you look. When your breaths quickened and your fingers tugged at his curls, he locked his arm around your stomach, slid one, then two fingers inside of you and sped up his movements, moving his head from side to side as he hummed onto your clit.

Your body tensed and you held onto him for dear life as the knot in your stomach gave out, the pleasure spreading all throughout your body. Your mouth dropped open in ecstasy, your neck craning back and Tom couldn’t look away from you. You looked like a painting and he wanted to commit it to memory.

He let go of you and kissed his way up your body, soothing you with his lips. Your legs were still twitching slightly, your stomach clenching and unclenching when his kisses reached your cheek. “Look so pretty when you come for me.” He kissed along your jaw, “Can’t believe you’ve deprived me of such a beautiful sight for so long.” He kissed your lips and tugged your bottom one between his teeth, before looking at you, eyes wide, “You gonna give me the privilege of seeing it again?”

You smiled, your hands coming up to hold his cheeks. “You can see it whenever you want. As long as you’re the one making it happen.” You pulled him to you and kissed him, the both of you moaning into the small gaps between your mouths.

He started to pull away but you whined and pulled him back making him smile. “I’ve gotta get a condom, love.”

He tried to get up again but you pulled him back down, “M’on the pill Tommy.” You looked up at him, pouting and he almost gasped––the effect you had on him was insane. “Just fuck me please.”

He didn’t need anymore convincing, grabbing a hold of his cock and swiping it through your folds, groaning out loud at how good your wetness felt. You bucked your hips and realizing you were getting desperate, he finally slid into you and all your senses immediately tuned into him.

Just like your dream––All of your senses were in overdrive. All you could feel were the hands tracing every curve of your body, playing you like a toy they’d made themselves. All you could hear was that sweet, rough voice telling you praises and calling you endearing names as your whole body shivered from the pleasure.

His eyes were watching your face, taking you in as he thrusted into you, making sure you were enjoying everything he was giving you. You felt absolutely amazing and so did he. “So perfect for me, darling. That’s it.” He bit his lip and sped up, making your jaw drop as you stared into his eyes, completely open and vulnerable to him. His touch was tantalizing, even better than your fantasies which only meant you’d become more addicted to him and what he could do to you.

He grunted, angling his hips when he found your spot, hitting it over and over, bringing his hand down to play with your clit. “Told you I wanted to see you cum again, pretty girl. So you’re gonna cum then I’m gonna fill you up. That sound okay?”

You nodded eagerly, eyes watching his every move as your hands gripped his arms, your thighs burning invitingly as they stretched around him with every thrust. Then you uttered that one word that always had him almost inappropriately weak for you. “Want to be full of you, professor.”

His jaw slacked and he paused for a slight moment before picking up his pace, faster than before, hips chasing after both your highs, fingers still rubbing you just the way he learned, just the way you liked. “Fuck-–”

A few more thrusts and flicks of his wrist and you were tensing under him, your pussy clenching around him as he let out broken curses and moans, losing his rhythm and releasing into you with a groan.

He rested some of his weight on you for a moment, the both of you smiling and laughing breathlessly as you took in the moment. Your hands came up to play with his curls and he sighed, leaning into your touch. He lowered his head into the crook of your neck and left a few soft kisses, coaxing some sighs from you as well.

After a moment, he rolled over and took you with him, making you nuzzle further into him, his arm wrapped around you, your leg slung over his waist. His hand was rubbing up to your ass and down to your thigh, lulling you to sleep while simultaneously riling you up again.

He kissed your forehead and you kissed his chest in response. “That was fucking amazing, love.”

You nodded and hummed in agreement, “Even better than my dreams.”

He pulled back to look at you, you could hear his heartbeat quicken and you tried to hide your face in his chest. “You had dreams about this too?”

That made you lift your head up to look at him. You could see in his eyes that he wasn’t joking but you were still slightly shocked. “Too?”

He smiled, licking his lips, “Well maybe we should discuss them, and try them out for ourselves.” His hand found its way between your legs again, making you moan but that didn’t stop you from responding.

You nodded, “For research purposes, of course.”

“Of course.” He grinned, “See, I knew I taught you well.” He leaned in to kiss you deeply, “My girl’s the perfect student.”

You spent hours exploring each other's bodies as you reenacted your dreams, both exceeding each other's expectations every time. By the time you fell asleep in each other's arms, it was late at night and you were sweaty, and tired, but overwhelmingly pleased.

❊❊❊❊

The next Friday, it was halloween. Liz had somehow convinced you to go to a halloween party with her. On top of that it was a frat party. And even worse, you dressed up as a school girl because it was all last minute and you didn’t have any time to get a costume.

“Oh come on Y/N, you look hot!”

You turned in the full length mirror to look at your ass that was almost visible in this mini skirt. “You think so?”

“Duh.”

And that’s all the convincing you needed to go out. You needed a little college fun. You hadn’t been to a party in who knows how long because you were always focusing on your work. You deserved this. Also Liz said it was a celebration of your “lay”, yes, she said lay.

“I’m just saying you cannot let me get with him again.”

“Liz it’s literally his frat house that we’re going to and we both know you have little to no self control.”

“Well damn. You couldn’t have sugar coated it?”

“What, you want me to throw a packet of splenda on you?” You joked.

She shoved you, “Dude shut up,” she laughed.

You looked down at your bare thighs that were only partly covered by your thigh high socks and rubbed your arms, regretting not bringing a jacket when Liz spoke up again. “Oh shit, is that Professor Holland?”

Your eyes shot up and made direct eye contact with him. He was wearing a hoodie and some sweats but he still looked great as usual. His eyes trailed down your body and soon your shivers were no longer because of the cold.

“I’ll just wait here.” Liz said suggestively and you walked over to Tom.

“H–Hi.”

He put his hands in his pockets to stop himself from reaching out to touch you, he didn’t know who was around. “Well hello to you too.” He looked into your eyes, a smirk on his face. You rubbed your arms quickly for warmth, and Tom had to control himself to not look at your chest, even though he could see your nipples hardening from the weather through your shirt. He wanted nothing more than to hold you in his arms and take you home.

“Any plans?” You asked.

“No, I'm just about to go home. I’m uh guessing you have somewhere to be?” His eyes traced your figure again.

“Yeah um me and Liz are going to a frat party.” You pointed back to your friend and gave him a small smile and shrug. “She convinced me.”

He wanted to kiss you so bad but he had to restrain himself.

“Be safe tonight, yeah?” His eyes were comforting, as they always were, but this felt almost more personal? Almost like he didn’t want you to go. And honestly, after seeing him, you almost didn’t want to either. You never defined your relationship with him, so honestly right now he was like a friend with benefits––professor with benefits, if you will.

You nodded, licking your lips nervously. “O––Okay. I will. You be safe too!”

His eyes followed you as you walked off, your friend pulling you along, obviously whispering to you, probably about him. You looked so fucking good and everyone else was going to see that too. It’s not like he owned you or anything, but part of him really wished he could claim you, openly care for you and be affectionate. His thoughts were a mix of wholesome and raunchy and he had no idea how to act.

He almost felt wrong but he couldn’t get the thoughts out of his mind, the way you looked up at him sheepishly, the innocent look in your eyes while you were wearing that mini skirt. His cock was bulging in his boxers ever since he first laid eyes on you. When he got home, he made his way to his bed, undressing almost immediately. Lying down in the middle of the bed, just where you were days before brought a flood of memories into his mind, only making his member throb even more. He tugged at his cock, spitting in his hand to make it slick.

Images of you were flashing in his mind as he sped up his movements, desperate for a release.

He was dying to get a taste of you again. The memory of the way you felt under his fingertips, the way your muscles clenched when he hit the right spots. The way you tasted when you were dripping onto his tongue. The way you looked at him when you came, your lips parted to release broken moans and whimpers. The way your fingers gripped his curls as your body tensed. It was all enough to make him spill over his hand, his breaths coming out in quick pants as his head dropped back onto the pillow.

“Fuck.” He really had it bad for you.

❊❊❊❊

Tom had texted you during class on Tuesday to meet him in his office when you were done with classes for the day. When you stepped into the room, he locked the door immediately, bringing you over to his desk, his lips chasing yours. Screw worrying about people hearing you, he wanted you. Now.

“God, just seeing you in that tight little costume––you have no idea how badly I wanted to ravish you. The thought of all those dumb frat boys seeing you in all your glory like that––I was absolutely beside myself.” So that’s what this was about. His hand came up to hold your cheek, his eyes fiercely staring into yours and you nuzzled into his touch, your hand holding his wrist softly and his eyes softened at the sight of you.

“I’m gonna absolutely devour you.” You gasped and he smiled, pulling your pants along with panties down. He sat you down on his desk and got down on his knees, licking his lips. “As soon as I got a taste of you, I knew I wouldn’t be able to go without it ever again.” He kissed your thigh, looking up at you. “You gonna let me have a taste again? Wanna make you feel good, lovie.”

You nodded, swallowing roughly, “Y––Yeah. Yes please.”

He chuckled breathlessly, “Such a polite little thing you are.” He kissed his way from your inner thigh to your center before licking a torturously slow stripe from your hole to your clit. You let out a sigh and gripped the desk, your fingertips becoming lighter at how hard you were already holding it.

His hands held your thighs open, putting them over his shoulders, holding you in place. His tongue was languidly licking you up and down, savoring your taste and your moans, coaxing them out of you one by one, nonstop. He looked up at you and your breath got caught in your throat, the look in his eyes fierce, almost as if he could see your bare soul and he clearly liked what he saw. He brought his lips to close around your heat after every other swipe of his tongue, passionately kissing your heat.

“So fucking good, angel. Always the best for me.”

You nodded, licking your lips, one of your hands coming to grab at his curls, making him growl into you. “Only for you, Tommy.”

He didn’t stop his tongue or his lips until you came, your back arching, fingers frantically grabbing for whatever you could hold, lip trapped between your teeth to muffle the moans that so desperately wanted to escape into the quiet air of the room. He kept going until you had to pull his head away from you, overwhelmed by all the pleasure and scared that you would scream and alert everyone in the building about what you were up to.

His hands were caressing your thighs, eyes looking at you in awe, almost too innocently for what you’d just done. He stood up between your legs and leaned in to kiss you, letting you taste yourself on his tongue and his lips.

He pulled away to look at you, hands holding your hips as your legs wrapped around his waist. You brought your arms up to link around his neck, looking up at him appreciatively and absolutely spent. “So do you think I should wear school girl outfits more often?”

He laughed, his hands holding you tighter, “If you do, my head is never leaving between your thighs.”

You smiled cheekily, batting your lashes at him. “Promise?”

He’d never gotten down on his knees quicker in his life. Let’s just say it took you another hour before you left his office.

❊❊❊❊

Over the past few weeks it had become a routine for you to go over to Tom’s office to seemingly “work on your assignments and review,” so it wasn’t out of the ordinary for you to show up unannounced Friday afternoon. Without meaning to, though, it seemed you showed up a little too early, and ended up overhearing part of Tom and Harrison’s conversation.

“I can tell Y/N means a lot to you, mate. Don’t lie.” Your heart dropped to your stomach as you skidded just in front of the door, about to turn the corner inside. You backed up and stayed pressed to the wall. Luckily no one really stopped by this side of the building at this time on a Friday, so no one would find you snooping around in the middle of the hallway.

“No I just––”

No. He said no––Okay you weren’t going to freak out. This always happens in the movies, and then the main character runs away before hearing the most important part and they overreact. So you decided to just...wait it out.

So you waited and waited. And the more the silence overwhelmed you, the louder it got. You could feel the tears starting to form in your eyes because you really thought your feelings were mutual. But just as you inched your foot backwards to walk away, he spoke up again, his voice quiet.

“She means everything to me, man. I––It scares me, honestly. I just don’t want to mess it up.”

This time the tears fully formed in your eyes, but for the absolute opposite reason. You smiled and wiped at your eyes, not even bothering to hide anymore as you turned the corner, surprising Tom, his eyes widening as he took in your appearance. Harrison turned around to see you and his gaze filled with concern as well.

“Tom––” your voice was quiet but there was a smile on your face.

“Darling––” He rushed over to you and grabbed your hands, wiping your cheeks with his thumbs to catch the few tears that escaped. “What’s wrong, are you alright?”

Your hands came up to hold his wrists as you looked into his eyes, “I heard you talking.”

His face dropped in realization and he could feel his heart pounding in his chest.

Harrison cleared his throat and subtly made his way out, “You guys have some things to discuss.” He put a hand on your shoulder and you both smiled at each other appreciatively before he walked out, shutting the door behind him.

Tom took your hands and brought you over to the couch. “I hope I didn’t scare you off, love.”

You shook your head immediately, even climbing in his lap to prove him wrong and he smiled gratefully. “No! It’s just that we never really talked, you know, about us.” He nodded and you took that as a sign to continue, enjoying the way his hands subconsciously slipped under your shirt to rub at your skin soothingly. “I like you Tom, obviously. But I like you a lot.” You linked your hands behind his neck. “I think I might be falling for you.”

His eyes started tearing up as well, as he smiled, “Yeah well, I think I’ve already fallen for you, darling.”

You looked into his eyes and your smile brightened, “Okay maybe I lied––I’ve definitely already fallen for you as well.”

You both laughed lovingly, pulling each other in for a sweet kiss.“Look,” Tom started, licking his lips. “I don’t know what this means for our future, but all I know is I don’t plan on letting you go any time soon.”

You kissed his lips softly, “Well I don’t plan on leaving any time soon either.”

“Good.” He looked at you and you felt as though your soul was out and open for him to hold and love. “Cause you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Y/N and I don’t ever want to lose you.”

You could feel your eyes tearing up again. This felt good. This felt like home.

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland imagine #tom holland oneshot #tom holland fic #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #professor!tom holland #professor!tom holland x reader #tom holland angst #for a sec tho lol #professor!tom holland imagine #professor!tom holland fic #professor!tom holland oneshot #professor!tom holland smut #professor!tom holland angst #professor!tom holland fluff

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murphslass · 3 years

Text

Nervous Much Pt.4

Pt.1 > Pt.2 >> Pt.3

Warnings: fluff, romance, smut, daddy kink

A couple weeks had passed of your relationship with Negan. He was so sweet and took you on lots of dates. He also was big on PDA wherever you guys were out. Admittedly you felt nervous when he would do things so publicly with no hesitation but soon grew fond of it. However, you guys didn’t have sex yet. Mostly because everytime you two had gotten close to it, something came up. One time you were interrupted by coworkers in the back room. Another was when your mom had called during foreplay at your house. Either way it was frustrating and you were more upset with it then Negan was. Currently you were out with him at a restaurant eating dinner. He saw you were grumpy and tried to cheer you up.

“So tomorrow I know we both get a couple nights off from the bar. And I was wondering if you’d be up for a little sleepover.”

“What are we five?”

You laugh and Negan just says a sarcastic remark.

“I’m being serious. I want to host us a beautiful night together.”

“Oh yeah? Tell me what shall the host have in store?”

“Well, I was hoping to watch some random horror movie, provide some delicious snacks, and get close under the stars.”

“Wow that does sound like a lovely night.”

He smiles and goes on about how he’s gonna show you a great time and how it’s something you’ll never forget. You both finished your lunch and let Negan lead you back to his bike. He took you home and continued being cocky.

“Trust me baby. I’m gonna blow that pretty little mind of yours.”

“I’m counting on it.”

You wink at him before being pulled into a deep kiss. His hands holding your body close and his beard scratching your skin lightly. You couldn’t get enough of him especially when he was kissing you. His touch had you addicted.

“I’ll be seeing you tonight. Were something comfortable.”

“You’ve got it.”

You say as you walk into your home and hear Negan’s bike pull out of the driveway. You couldn’t stop smiling and felt excited for the night Negan had planned. You prepared yourself with a cozy nap in hopes not to fall asleep early and wore comfortable pajamas with a surprise underneath. This might be the night that you finally go all the way. You shook away your nerves as Negan picked you up in his Chevy Corvette. It was an extremely beautiful car and different to see him from his bike. He talked about his car before but he mentioned that it was only driven rarely. It made you feel special when you saw he wanted you to ride in it. He even showed off a bit as the road was clear and he sped up. You giggled as you watched Negan get excited like he was a kid. Soon he pulled into his studio apartment and you enjoyed how nice he kept the place. Everything was vintage styled yet gave a modern feel to it. His color scheme was just like his hair, black and gray. You admired the window and the spiral staircase. It was super nice and really fitted Negan’s style.

“Your place is amazing! I can’t believe we haven’t come here.”

“Well my place was actually super fucking messy and I needed to clean up.”

“Well I appreciate that.”

You say as Negan approached you and held both your hands.

“Does my girl care for something to drink? I’ve

got soda, water, juice, or if ya feeling like coffee I could brew some.”

“Just a soda is fine.”

“Coming right up!”

He says as he makes his way toward his kitchen. You walk over to admire the view from the window and saw the lights of the city. It was so nice to see. You felt him behind you and see him place your drink on the dining table. His arms go around your waist and kissed behind your ear. At first he was playful and left quick pecks but he picked a certain spot and slowly began nibbling. You moan and his arms pull you flush against him.

“You’re more breathtaking than the view.”

He whispered between kisses and left marks on you. You turn towards him and got pinned against the cold glass. His lips find yours and you moan against him. His hands felt over your body and paid most attention toward your curves, your hands held onto his shoulders as he began to grow rougher. You felt him tugging at the material of your shirt and pull away to rip it off your body. He does the same with his shirt and throws it on the ground. His lips hungrily kisses down your neck and your leg being pulled to his hip. You bit your lip as he leaned down to pull away your bra and suck onto your nipples. Your head rested against the window as your hands go to his hair.

“I have to have you Y/N. Right now.”

He said in a growl as reached remove your shorts. You didn’t respond as you kicked off the restricting clothes. Negan smirked down to see your cute panties.

“Ooh look at that, you wear these just for me baby?”

“Maybe…”

You whispered as he teased your panty line with his finger tips. He flashed a cocky smile as your hips moved to try and get him to touch you more. His fingers slidding down into your panties and you whimper as he massages your aching clit.

“Damn it’s like a fucking ocean down there.”

“I can’t help it. You feel so good.”

He continues and goes to tease your entrance, he enjoyed hearing your voice as he touches you. His fingers speed up making you feel stimulation. Your hand going to grab onto his wrist. He moaned at your arousal and pulled away to loosen his tight pants. You look down to see the large buldge against his dark boxers. You reached to push down and saw the soft dark curls against his pelvis. His cock sprung out of his boxers and you could see the tip was flush red with desire.

“Hold on tight baby.”

He said as he lifted you and wrapped your legs onto his hips. Your hands held onto his shoulders and one arm held your waist and the other shoving your underwear to the side and slip into you. Both of you moaned out at the feel of each other. His breath ragged as he gazed at your flushed face.

“Oh shit baby. You feel better than I imagined.”

He smirked as he began thrusting into you. You quiver at the pleasure that shot through your body. He pressed you firmly against the glass and moved his hips harshly. Your arms clung onto his body and you couldn’t help the noises escaping you.

“Fuck yeah baby, keep on letting me know how good my cock feels.”

He growled against your neck and his grip held you close as he went deeper.

“Negan, it feels so good. Don’t stop please don’t stop.”

He let out a breathy chuckle and kissed along your breasts. The began to feel overwhelming as his fingers went to circle along your swollen clit. Your nails dung into his skin and thighs shaked along his body. His deep groans filled your ears and his arms brought your legs to wrap onto him.

“Yes, Negan yes! Make me come. Please babe I’m close.”

He smirked and went harder the last few thrusts before you came undone. He smiled as he saw you experience him and soon he finished inside you. Your body fell limb against him and he laughed as he carried you to the couch.

“You enjoy yourself?”

“Yeah. You were amazing.”

“Here let me grab a rag so you can clean yourself up sweet thing.”

You kissed his cheek as he got up to grab a wash cloth from the bathroom. You did sneak a few glances of his cute ass. Making his way toward you he hands you a towel. You cleaned up and had Negan holding you in his arms. He held you in his lap before getting up to find you a spare shirt you could wear. He slipped on a pair of loose sweats and let you pick a movie.

“By the way, your soda is definitely watered down.”

“It’s okay, I’ll grab another one.”

You say as you stood and handed him the desired movie. He playfully hit your ass when you passed him and you giggled. You were about to sit down but you saw Negan laid a few blankets and nice pillows on the ground as a nice bed. You take his hand as he helped you kneel down to the floor. You felt the soft covers and Negan pulling you to lay against his body.

“You want any candy or something?”

“Well it depends what do you have?”

He grinned and reached to pull a small bucket of different candies.

“Anything between chocolate, gummy, or even some minty shit.”

“Oh wow. This is a bit much.”

“It’s nothing babe. Go on pick what you like.”

You reached to grab a candy bar and Negan started the film. Negan made comments and little jokes throughout the movie and which you would reply with by nudging him with your shoulder.

“Can you just watch the movie?”

“Nope. Gotta speak my mind at anytime baby.”

You just laughed it off and enjoyed the way Negan held onto you. Soon the movie ended and you suggested to start another one but Negan dismissed it as he stood to use the restroom. You sat up and look out the window to see the starry sky accompanied by the city lights. You get lost into the sighf and forget where you are so when Negan sits next to you, it goes unnoticed. He didn’t say anything but joined in. You turned to lay on your side and stared out the window, Negan curled to spoon you. You scooted closer to him and heard him groan. That only gave you an idea and giggled as you pressed against his crotch. He didn’t do anything but squeeze your middle.

You slid your hand behind you and went to caress over his sweats. Negan moaned and you took it as encouragement to go further. Your hand then went beneath his pants and you felt him growing hard at the touch. He nuzzled his face in your neck and felt his breath growing heavy. His hand pulled your wrist and shifted to move over you.

“Did I get someone excited?”

You smirked as your hand brushed over his chest and he chuckled. He leaned down and kissed your lips. You two had sex again but this time, Negan took his time with you. He slowed down from the rough kisses to soft and slow. You felt his touch everywhere and his lips burned into your skin. The sweet whispers he said into your ear as he rolled his hips to that sweet spot. Only his name left your mouthand held onto him tightly.

For a minute he held his body over yours and took in the sweet bliss in your after glow.

“Ya know something sugar.”

“What?”

“Your fucking special and I like this little thing we got here.”

“I do too.”

You smile and as he sweetly kisses you. Negan lays on his side and you lay against his chest.

I think this will turn into a series 😳 ….

JDM TAGLIST:

@ffakc @negans-attagirl @jonasdean02 @eddiesgirl @littlebadgirly @cosmilla @iluvneganandjamie @little-bad-girly @ohyoubetterbejokin @bratty-dolly @jdmsgal @nyxerebus

#jeffrey dean morgan #jeffrey dean morgan x reader #jeffrey dean morgan x you #fanfic #jeffreys thirst squad #negan x you #negan x reader #negan #the walking dead negan #twd fanfiction #negans thirst squad #negan smut

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bluesfortheredj · 3 years

Text

The spy who loved me.

Smut ahead. Like, seriously. Smut.

It had been a long time, a very long time, since seeing Eggsy. Even professional spies weren’t immune to the restrictions and rules when it came to lockdown. The daily texts, phone calls, and video chats had satiated your need for contact with him only so much, and you were both desperate for some intimacy with one another in person. At this point even the thought of holding his hand was enough to make you feel giddy; those slender fingers of his linked with yours again before exploring your body… it was positively breath taking.

Eggsy had stayed in London with his mum and sister in the new house he’d purchased for them only a couple of weeks before the world turned upside down and finally, now that lockdown was being lifted and you could form bubbles with other households, you were on your way to join them thanks to your job allowing you to continue to work from home; not that you were planning on working too much when you arrived. Butterflies were fluttering around your stomach as you pull up on the driveway and see his car parked half in and half out of the garage, and when you knock on the door your heart leaps as you see his familiar shadowy figure walk towards it.

He opens the door with a breathy ‘hey’ and you immediately fall into his chest before his arms wrap themselves around the body he’d missed so very much the last few months. The two of you stand there for what seems like hours yet minutes all at the same time, only separating when you shiver from the cool breeze blowing around both of you in the doorway. His hands stay on your arms as he leans away with a smile to take in the sight of you standing there in person finally, then he bends down to scoop your suitcase up and leads you inside, kicking the door shut behind you both.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” he sighs in disbelief as places your luggage down at the foot of the stairs before taking you through to the large lounge, “is this actually real?”

You press your lips to his in what begins as quite an innocent kiss but ends as a desperate, sloppy, heated embrace as he pushes you against the nearest wall before his hands begin to explore every inch of skin he can possibly touch underneath your top. Your hands grab at his jeans blindly, trying to find his belt so you could set him free from the confines of his underwear, and the two of you are freely moaning at the heightened feel of touching one another after so long. Neither of you hear the front door open and then close again, and Eggsy’s mum has to loudly clear her throat for the two of you to even notice that someone else was in the room.

“Shit!” Eggsy gasps, facing away as he does his jeans up.

“Oh my god,” you whisper with hot cheeks as you smooth your clothes down, “I’m so sorry Mrs. Unwin.”

“Sorry mum!”

“I think it can be forgiven under the current circumstances,” she chuckles, “good to see you again (Y/N)!”

Daisy sits in her pram giggling at her own foot and your heart melts at the sight of her, “it’s lovely to see you both, Daisy’s grown so much!”

“She’s eating us out of house and home!” Michelle exclaims, “she’s going through the longest growth spurt I’ve ever known of!”

“Well that’s lucky, because a little birdie told me that she’s partial to a certain dinosaur shaped biscuit, and I happen to have a couple of packs of them in my suitcase.”

“You’re a life saver,” she sighs in relief, “Eggsy, why don’t you show her around the house? I guess you didn’t quite get that far...”

“Will do mum,” he nods as a blush creeps up his cheeks, “this way.”

He picks your suitcase up and leads you up the floating staircase as you take in the very modern and expensive surroundings you now find yourself in.

“Bloody hell Eggs, this house is amazing!” you exhale in disbelief as your fingers glide along the wall.

“Nice, init?”

“Nice? Bit of an understatement!”

“Wait until you see our room… the walk in shower is to die for,” he says with a wink and a light bite of his lip, “plus we’re the opposite end of the top floor so we don’t need to be too quiet.”

You give his arm a playful slap and he takes your hand as the two of you head to his side of the house and the more than generous bedroom he got to call his own until life could continue as normal. It felt as if you were in an episode of Grand Designs with how modern and clean everything was, and you walk through the wardrobe space with long rails either side of you filled with variations of the same suit to the extravagant en suite with charcoal tiles lining the floor and walls and the biggest walk in shower you’d ever seen in your life; only one sheet of glass slap bang in the middle of the room to separate the shower area and the toilet and sink.

“This is literally bigger than my flat,” you groan, “I think I need to become a spy as well.”

“Don’t even joke about that,” Eggsy scolds as his brow furrows, “anyway, you’ve got me, and what’s mine is yours.”

“Yeah but that’s not fair for me to rely on you like that, plus I don’t have anything to give you in return.”

“Uh… I would disagree with that statement…”

“Huh?” you question as you look up at the square shower head and wonder what it must feel like underneath it.

You’re so transfixed by the fitting you don’t even notice Eggsy creep up to you until his sultry breath flows over your ear, “you have plenty to give me,” he whispers.

You shiver involuntarily as his fingers creep their way around your hips before walking along into the waistband of your jeans. Your head rolls back to lean on his shoulder as your hands grip firmly onto his forearms while his fingers tease your lips apart and stroke along your hidden folds gently, and you can feel his own excitement at the intimate touch against your backside.

“What would you two like for dinner?” Michelle shouts up the stairs, tearing you both away from your quiet moment and forcing you back to reality with a jolt.

Eggsy groans in frustration as he reluctantly retracts his hands from your body and you find yourself now completely worked up and more than ready for him to show you exactly what you’d been missing the last few months. A sigh escapes your lips as you steady yourself on the shower screen and Eggsy can see just how desperate you are to continue what he’d just started.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“It’s fine, I just didn’t realise how much I missed that.”

What the two of you needed right now was, quite simply, a fuck; something that would just purely release the initial tension that had built during lockdown. You had plenty of time to make love romantically now that you were staying there, and you could take your time with it hen Michelle and Daisy were out doing the food shop or something, but what you needed at this precise moment was a quick and messy release. The two of you look at one another, knowing exactly what was going to happen, and Eggsy quickly runs downstairs to give his mum an idea of what you wanted to eat that would take at least half an hour or so to give you a small window of opportunity.

“Right,” he exhales as he shuts the bedroom door behind him when he returns, “oh…” he pauses as he sees you’re already in his bed, your clothes and underwear in a pile on the floor next to it, and he discards his own clothing on his way over to you.

“How long have we got?” you ask as he settles on top of your body and adjusts the duvet accordingly.

“Like half an hour I think?” he grins before removing his glasses and leaning down to kiss you.

He’s almost pressing his entire body weight onto you as your mouths move around one another’s in a sloppy kiss that’s more teeth and saliva than anything else in all honesty, and your hands are grabbing at every inch of skin you can get a hold of as he manoeuvres himself between your legs hastily and carefully guides his length inside your already slick walls that had been waiting for him for what seemed like so long. The sensation of him inside you and his body on top of yours once more is overwhelming, and it doesn’t take you long to fall into a fast and needy rhythm as you two of you moan unashamedly while the bed rocks beneath you. This is exactly what you both needed; passionate, hot, fast, handsy, loud sex. It was purely to scratch an itch that was in desperate need of attention, and as the need to orgasm heightens with each deep thrust you find yourselves going out of rhythm as the aching for release takes over.

“Eggsy… Eggsy!” you moan as his lips attempt to kiss your neck.

“Fuck, (Y/N), I ain’t gonna last,” he pants against your skin.

The sound of your bodies slapping against one another in quick succession drifts up from underneath the duvet and the two of you are truly lost in the haze of impending orgasms just as Michelle opens the door while asking a question that isn’t even distinguishable to either of you until there’s a gasp at the doorway which shocks you both to stillness.

“Mum!” Eggsy shouts, “get out!”

She quickly retreats and slams the door shut before you hear her practically running away down the landing towards the stairs. You look up at Eggsy who slowly turns to face you, then his lips land on yours within seconds as his hips start up again; his stiff member filling you with ease as your legs wrap around his backside.

“You know I love you,” he breathes heavily between intermittent pants.

“I know,” you nod, “I love you too.”

“Good,” he smiles, then leans his head down and bites onto your breast so he can flick his tongue over your nipple.

You cry out with pleasure at his sudden move and your hands weave their way through his hair to keep him where he is as your muscles begin to tense inside, ready for the much needed release. Before you can get to yours though, Eggsy lets out a hot, stuttered breath over your chest and his entire body tenses as he finally lets go with the longest groan you’d ever heard him make. He soldiers on after his climax and with some encouragement from his thumb rubbing over your sweet spot, you soon clench around him and release to the sound of whispered pants of his name which are emanating from your throat without you even realising. You blink away the stars in your eyes and finally look at his satisfied face hovering above you, then he flops down next to you and takes your hand in his as you both catch your breath.

“You do realise I will never be able to look your mum in the eye again, right?” you chuckle after a few moments of silence.

“Same,” he grimaces playfully, “I think we’ll just hide up here the rest of the night.”

could you make it as smutty as possible with some fluff, there visiting his parents back home and they can’t keep their hands off each other and his parents notice but don’t say anything until his mum walks in on them on the sofa in a very heated and handsy make out they apologise and try forget what happened but then she walks in on them the next evening in his room having sex there embarrassed again but still continue after she has left as they just can’t get enough of each other – Taron or Eggsy – @sarahegerton96

#eggsy x reader #eggsy unwin imagine #eggsy unwin fanfic #eggsy unwin x reader #taron egerton #eggsy unwin smut

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rekrappeter · 3 years

Text

music to my eyes

♡ pairing: fred weasley x reader

♡ notes: this is just something small, I haven’t had much inspiration lately plus I'll never get sick of writing the best friend to lover tropes

♡ warnings: kissing, mentions of drinking alcohol, mentions of pregnancy, mentions of being lonely

At first, it sounded like a great idea - the thought of having all your closest friends in one house for New Years Eve was great, especially with the year that was in it. You made a pact before leaving Hogwarts that you’d continue to spend time with the group that got you through the endless classes; however, it seemed that this year everyone was busy with other things. You could probably count the amount of times that you got together on one hand. It was understandable, you had started a new job, finally finding your feet in the muggle world.

One of your best friends, George Weasley, and Angelina got married, having an intimate wedding out their back-garden - which was one of the social gatherings you all made it to. Lee Jordan had met an Irish witch, Niamh, and ended up getting married and having a baby in the space of twelve months, “It was love at first sight” he had insisted. Leaving you and your other best friend, Fred Weasley, the only two people with no relationship commitments in the group. Hence, how easy it was for you and Fred to drop everything and head off down the country with the ‘so-called adults’ of the group now. It wasn’t until you were swirling your finger on the rim of your wine glass, listening into the conversations the couples were having that you suddenly felt lonely.

You couldn’t add anything interesting or of any use into their conversations; you never had any experience planning a wedding or getting up at 2am to a crying baby. There was a sudden aching feeling in your body, an empty hole in your chest but you tried your best to plaster a smile on your face. Lifting your gaze up from the red wine, you immediately caught Fred’s eyes. He raised his brow up, silently asking if you were alright and you nodded subtly, smiling at him. “Speaking of babies,” George announced loudly, standing up and placing his hand on Angelina’s shoulder, who lifted her own manicured fingers and caressed his hand, “Angelina and I have something to announce.”

George never got a chance to comment any further before Lee and Fred were bouncing out of their own chairs and hurdling themselves at him, “No way!” Fred cheered, ruffling his younger twins hair. “Georgie is gonna be a dad!”

“Congratulations, Angie,” you said, pulling yourself out of the trance that you didn’t realise you were in. You wrapped your arms around her, squeezing her slightly, “I was wondering why you were having an alcohol free weekend,” you teased, pulling back and letting Niamh embrace her.

“I really wanted to tell you earlier, but George thought it would be best to tell the group together.”

“It’s such amazing news,” you sighed, jumping slightly when you feel on a hand place itself on your shoulder and you turn to see George, his hair cut shorter than his twins currently, “Georgie,” you gasped, you hug him tightly, even tighter than Angelina, and placing a soft kiss on his cheek. “Congratulations.”

Fred watched the interaction quietly, the voices of Angelina and Niamh fading into the background. He watched how soft you were with his twin, yet he couldn’t help but notice how tense your shoulders were. It always looked as if you were hiding something, that you were plastering all these beautiful smiles to keep a secret from him. He watched George and you whisper back and forward, how George’s hand cupped your cheek and it looked as if he was muttering words of encouragement to you. He noticed you nibble on your bottom lip, nodding your head softly. Fred shuffled on his feet and lifted the bottle of beer in his grasp to his lips when you pulled away from his brother. His heart was hammering against his chest, but it started to ease when you walked over to him.

“How does it feel to become an uncle?” You asked him, standing next to him and leaning on the kitchen counter. You faced out to the group that were laughing and tidying up the dinner table, feeling the warmth from Fred’s body heat.

“Old,” Fred muttered, feigning a groan and it made you chuckle. He loved that sound, and he loved the way you would roll your eyes dramatically and shove him away from you.

“Don’t say that,” you sighed, “If you’re getting old, it means I’m getting old.”

“Well, I hate to break it to you, love.”

“Freddie,” you gasped, leaning into him, and only catching a glimpse of the wink he sent your way. He lifted his arm to wrap around your shoulder, your perfume filled his nose and brought him home. There was no denying that he was head over heels in love with you, everyone seen it and sometimes, you did too. The lingering looks and the teasing smirks, it made your stomach flip and twist in on itself but you were never brave enough to move it beyond a simple friendship. There was never a doubt that there was a strong connection between you, it was a connection you never felt with anyone else before and you couldn’t imagine anyone ever taking his place. There was never a need to rush anything but with the fact that both of your best friends are moving on with their lives, which both included a family, it made you think. It made you think about all those times it was just you and Fred, if you were to do something, would you be on the same path as everyone else?

“What are you thinking about in that pretty mind of yours, darling?” Fred asked softly, his voice knocking down a notch. He wasn’t quiet enough though, George’s gaze lifted to watch the friends, but they were too occupied by each other. George nudged Angelina, who followed his gaze and smirked before dragging him out the door. Lee and Niamh got the hint quickly, and then it was just you and Fred, wrapped up in your own cocoon. You wanted to ask him the burning question but your emotions got the best of you, they became so overwhelming that you barely noticed the tears quickly sliding down your cheeks until Fred was wrapping his arms around you, humming softly in your ear. “What’s wrong?” he asked, rocking you back and forward.

“N-nothings wrong,” you assured him, squeezing your arms between you and wiping your tears away, “It’s just… Is it too late?”

Fred looked down at you, his lips parting in shock and his brows furrowed together, “T-too late for what, y/n?”

“For us,” your voice was quiet, barely above a whisper.

It was as if your words were a gush of wind with the aim of knocking him off his feet, it was a blow to his stomach. The silence erupted around you, your eyes searching for anything lingering beneath his brown ones but the longer he kept quiet, the smaller the hope became. Fred could feel the thumbing of his heart against his chest, he wanted to scream from the rooftops about how in love with you he was but he was stunned. He had never expected this, not in his wildest dreams. You had never seen Fred so quiet and it scared you, your words repeated in your head and you were quick to detangle yourself from his grasp. “Forget what I said,” you mumbled, turning on your heels and walking away from him, using the side of your hand to wipe away stray tears.

“Wait, wait,” Fred mumbled, finding his voice but it was nothing but a whisper. He darted towards you, as fast as his sock cladded feet could allow him to go without slipping on the tiles. He reached for your wrist, twirling you around and before you could mutter a single word, his lips caught yours quickly. Both of his hands cupped your jaw, his eyes fluttering closed and your heart was pounding fast but it calmed down and slowly, you started to settle, finding yourself kissing him back. Butterflies filled his stomach as he stumbled forward, pushing you back up against the wall. Your fingers trailed up his body, brushing gently against his jaw before finding home through his long locks.

Before he got carried away, Fred pulled away and breathed in your scent. His eyes fluttered open, finding yours still squeezed shut and he wasn’t prepared for them to open up; your eyes were heavy but igniting. Your breathing started to even out, feeling relief wash over you. “You couldn’t have done that about thirty seconds ago?”

“You caught me off guard,” Fred mumbled, a goofy grin on his face. You brought your fingers to clasp onto his collar, guiding his lips back to yours, becoming obsessed with how they felt against yours. You lost yourself in the moment, making up for lost time. “It’s most definitely not too late,” Fred mumbled against your lips, and the vibrations of your hums gave him the urge to keep on kissing you.

#fred weasley #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley fluff #Harry Potter imagines #Harry Potter imagine

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sasa-gay-yo · 3 years

Text

Levi At Your Wedding

Request / Summary: I loved the promise ring one so much and I was wondering if you could write one about Levi's wedding with reader?

Timeline: Timeskip

Warnings: some swearin’ and mentions of NSFW

Art Credits: AoT

It was nothing big because you two didn’t want it to be. Still, he was apprehensive. No, it took you months to convince him to let people even come to the wedding. The word wedding took even longer to enter his vocabulary. He probably was the last one to say it, even thought it was his wedding. At night, as you’d lay together, you’d talk about the flowers Hange wanted to put in your bouquet, or how Historia offered to buy clothes for you since you and Levi’s had acquired relatively primitive lifestyle in peacetimes, and he would almost fall asleep to it. You found it somewhat insulting, and had to ask him every day, ‘Do you really want to get married to me?’

Levi was never big on marriage and really knew nothing about it. No one around him was married, they were dead or under the age of twenty. He told you once, before these perfect years of peace and industrialization, that he didn’t see the concept of marriage necessary. People had all slowly learned that you were in a relationship with Captain Levi and that was that. He say nothing more concrete than the people knowing and respecting that. What was a paper going to do to change that?

One night, however, he convinced himself. He realized the necessity. The night before Historia granted them their honorable titles. He had been able to sit and process what happened at Shiganshina with you at his side. You held his hand and rubbed his back for hours and he let the tears fall for all his dead comrades, especially Erwin. You reassured him, and made him feel like he didn’t have to join his comrades out of guilt. He had nine others to care for and a country to build. He was needed. You needed him the most. He made love to you then. You were something he never wanted to lose, and he made sure you knew that.

It was then, buried inside of you, that he realized why people got married. He said it then and there too. It wasn’t a big proposal, and he didn’t have a ring and again didn’t know the concept of proposals, but he didn’t need one. After you two were done, laying in each other’s arms like always, he held on for dear life and asked you. You said yes. It was a done deal, and he was happy. So, when you asked him, ’Do you really want to get married to me?’ his answer was always yes. He bought a cabin for you two near the Scout HQ, painstakingly let you ask him everything about the décor, and you two even consolidated his years old bank account that he barely touched to help pay for this wedding. Wasn’t that enough for you to know he wanted this? These things were pretty irreversible.

Then came the actual wedding day. It wasn’t your handwriting on the calendar that hung in your kitchen anymore. It wasn’t something that you kept reminding him was coming near. He didn’t anticipate that part, but it seemed that everyone else had. They were waiting for years and years to finally give Levi and (Y/F/N) the perfect wedding, that it almost seemed like you didn’t have to plan anything (but he still had to pay for it which he will never understand). You were similar to Levi in that aspect. You didn’t want anything extravagant ever, and you would rather fix up something and work with it half broken then buy a new one. When Historia had taken you shopping for your wedding clothes, you’d never seen such expensive materials from Mitras at your disposal. You were once a farmhand.

However, seeing you walk down the makeshift aisle to him, Hange at your side, he decided that all this bickering, of people invading his house to talk about colors and food settings, all of it was worth it. You were smiling and happy. You were beautiful and perfect to him, wearing that and glowing. God, when he first started dating you, he never knew it would be like this. He never knew he could feel love this deep for someone. His eyes were just wide, remembering everything you two had been through to get to this point. Someone had called this the Period of Peace and staring into your eyes as you walked towards him, Levi felt those words. You were his peace. You comforted him. You made him feel strong. He was Humanity’s Strongest because you thought he was. He had to be the strongest for you. He felt like he was only put on this Earth to meet you at this point. Nothing else mattered as he looked in your eyes the whole time.

Perhaps even a few tears fell from your eyes as you saw him standing there in his military best. When you first started dating Levi, you could have never imagined you would be here now. As a nation and as a couple. You two had been through so many deaths and so many last kisses as he left for expeditions in the soft bright of the morning when you were half awake. A kiss that always said ‘see you soon.’ Now, when you kissed him, it was never a goodbye. It was a ‘have fun building a train at work’ or a ‘have fun meeting with the boat of Marleyans.’

You laughed at how red his face got when he was prompted to kiss you in front of all these people. Seeing this, you just gave him a small peck on the cheek, and you heard Jean and Connie outwardly protest. That’s when Levi grabbed you, needing to prove to the brats that he could kiss you, and left you breathless as he pulled back. Mr. and Mr./s. Ackerman. Connie and Sasha had given you a hand carved name plaque to put above your front door as your wedding gift. In black letters it said that: Mr. and Mr./s. Ackerman.

Levi didn’t expect there to be a dinner afterwards. He didn’t expect to be dragged along by an ecstatic you, ready to talk to any and everyone who came. Sasha and Historia hugged you. Jean commented on how he’d still take you from Levi if he didn’t treat you well. Armin gave a blushing congrats as you hugged him. It was all too fun for you. It was all perfect, especially with Levi at your side, only looking at you. In all honestly, he was looking at you, one, because he would be annoyed if he looked at anyone else, and this was apparently supposed to be his day, and two, because he wanted nothing more to just ride home with you and tear those expensive clothes Historia bought off of you. White was your color, and you had promised him mind-blowing after-wedding sex if he agreed to even have one of these things. He wouldn’t be lying if he said that was one of the only motivations he had for even showing up today. That and that fact that he couldn’t actually get married to you without showing up. Like he said, he wanted to get married to you.

When you finally got peace and quiet, you two sat at your own smaller table eating dinner and looking out at the dance floor that Hange herself had set up. There were people there playing instruments and someone had brought a newly built radio, so they all seemed to be enjoying themselves. One of your biggest motivations for throwing a wedding like this was not for you, but for them. The Scouts had become your kids, and they needed happiness. Even so, you looked wearily to Eren who’s empty eyes just stared at his friends having fun. You’d have to talk to him sometime about that and sometime soon.

“Did I tell you; you look amazing, dear?” You turned to look at Levi who was now looking away from you, trying to hide his blush after he said that. To this day, he couldn’t give you a comment like that without getting flustered.

“No, you haven’t husband, but you could say it again.” He rolled his eyes at you, knowing he wasn’t going to say it again. Every comment Levi gave you was fleeting unless it was in bed with you. In public, Levi had an image to upkeep and it was crumbling before his eyes, starting with the way he kissed you in front of everyone. He swore if one of those brats brought those new-fangled cameras and took a picture, he would beat them to a pulp before taking it from them… for research.

“How does it feel now that you’re married to me?” You asked him and he scoffed, looking out to the dance floor and taking a bite of his steak.

“Not very different. This ring on my finger is going to throw off my ODM skills.” It was your turn to roll your eyes at him and you grabbed his left hand, making sure that your rings were touching. He blushed again, looking down at your hands to avert his gaze anywhere but your eyes. He’d get lost in them now. Truthfully, he did feel different. He was feeling a bit overwhelmed by it too. He’d never felt this fluttering, this deepness of love. It was so much more than before, and to think it was all because he got to call you Mr/s. Ackerman. It had been echoing in his head over and over again, ever since the officiant had said it. You were his in everyway possible now. As a possessive man, it did things to him that he couldn’t explain.

“Did you at least like the wedding? That was my biggest worry.” He composed himself enough to look you in the eyes now.

“I liked it up to the part where I had to kiss you in front of all the brats. No one mentioned that to me.” You laughed and in hindsight, it was a good thing he didn’t know till then. He would have called off the wedding just for that reason.

“Still, you’re the one who pulled me in to kiss you.” The blush came again. Why was he blushing so much today? It was just a normal day? Ugh, this was so embarrassing for him. Of course it was all your doing. He would blame you for his image being ruined… but he wouldn’t mind kissing you again. He was still thinking about your promise in the back of his mind. How much longer would this reception go?

“If I let the brats see it at least once, they’ll stop pestering about not loving you enough.” Your heart warmed at that and looked back to the dancefloor. Connie and Sasha had gotten into some sort of competition with each other, and they were bumping into some of your friends, hollering at the top of their lungs. Your friends were definitely in for a surprise, having met the kids you always talk about for the first time. They weren’t kids, no, but they acted like it. They weren’t used to grown adults having his much fun, apparently, but you let them, even if Levi wanted to yell at them to pipe down. You always told Levi to stop yelling at them for having fun. The kids could finally be kids again.

“Do they tell you that you’re not loving me enough?” He just scoffed again, and brought you hand up to his chin, leaning on it to feel your warmth elsewhere. Yes, they told him that plenty of times. After you introduced yourself to them, when you had hid them from the Royal Government in your family’s cabin, they were always so curious about you and Levi. How did you meet? Does he actually have feelings? Does he really know how to love? Does he ever smile? It was endearing to you, and you got in trouble for telling them too much, even Levi’s sleeping habits. However, this devotion you had seemed to tell them that he wasn’t as devoted since he never talked about you.

That was definitely opposite of the case.

Levi was the one who loved you the fiercest. From the first kiss you had after saving you from Annie in Trost to two nights ago, after Hange had burst into you two naked, pulling you from him because of some stupid superstitions about weddings and not seeing you. It was uncomfortable to sleep in your own bed, without his arms wrapped around you. Without his words of love and affection after you two had cleaned yourselves off. Levi was an attentive lover. Levi was a lover, period, but they didn’t know that. They would never know that. Levi only showed that love to you. His special person. The love of his life, and you felt like it, too.

“When is this over? I was given a promise.” You pulled your hand from his grasp, scoffing at his boldness. His voice had trailed off at the end, hoping you knew exactly what he was talking about.

“Is that all you see me as? A sex object? That’s why you married me, isn’t it?” You crossed your arms, turning away from him. He just rolled his eyes at you, but that lovesick smirk didn’t leave his face. This was one of the reasons he loved you.

“You’re right. It is. Now, when do I reap my new benefits as husband? I’m sick of watching these brats dance and eat the food we have to pay for.” You looked over at your shoulder, smiling at him. You didn’t want to tell him that he probably had another two hours since you hadn’t started drinking yet. It was a goal of yours to get him on the dance floor at least once tonight.

“Patience is a virtue, not a curse. Also, I don’t remember promising you anything, Mr. Ackerman.” He rested his head in one hand, still smirking at you. This time an eyebrow quirked up, and it reminded you of the younger boy you met years ago, fresh out of the Underground. The one who has changed so much since you met him into this mature, strong, selfless man, yet he was still mischievous around you.

“Is that why you’re wearing that lacey number under those clothes, Mr/s. Ackerman? Didn’t promise me anything, huh? Did you let Historia pay for that too, or can I rip it off of you without any guilt tonight?”

#levi ackerman scenario #levi ackerman x you #levi ackerman x reader #levi attack on titan #snk levi #aot levi #attack on titan #attack on titan x reader #aot x reader #levi ackerman smut #aot smut #Captain Levi #attack on titan levi #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin levi

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justforthehe11ofit · 3 years

Text

‘Until Death Do Us Part, Again.’ Julian Devorak x Reader

(Chapter 1: A Very Warm Welcome)

Now finished!

This is part of a multi-chapter fic, If you would like to read the rest you can read it on my AO3 page which is the same username as on here! Or click the link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32643664

'His words warble as his emotions take hold, tears staining his cheeks while he grasps the apprentice tighter, "I will never let you go again, my love. I promise."' Continuing after the tale 'A Warm Welcome', Julian struggles to fight his doubts on whether a proposal while staying in Nevivon is a good idea, missing the opportunity in the hot springs and of course causing more trouble than he can handle (at least he asks for help this time).

A headcanon that I have inspired by the assumptions of others in which they thought Julian was going to propose during the hot springs scene, where he is given another opportunity eventually... not without creating problems for himself beforehand. That would be un-Julian like.

Word Count: 1,641

As soon as he mumbles the words, Portia incredulously glares down at Julian across the table, barely taller than him as she stands, while he shrinks into his chair. “Excuse me? Could you repeat that because I don’t think I heard you right.”

“I… didn’t do it?...” Leaning across the table with his hands joined and bunching up his shoulders, Julian plasters on an award winning pity grin, which of course Portia does not buy into.

“What do you mean ‘you didn’t do it’?” Nasally mocking his excuse.

“I-I just didn't, okay!” He drops his head into his hands, with an exasperated sigh and brows furrowed, “I wanted to but it was as if my hands didn’t want to cooperate and gave into my own nervousness, so I just didn’t do it.”

After returning from the hot springs, Julian and the apprentice had finished cleaning the remains of dinner, just chatting and enjoying each other’s company, until Portia had strolled in. As she was seeping with anticipation, Julian told Y/N he would join them soon for sleep, and so was left to be bombarded with questions about if he had gone through with what he had told Portia a few days before departing from Vesuvia.

Motioning her arms outward, Portia states “you know you had the perfect opportunity, right?”

“I know.” Mumbling the pitiful words into his hands, slumping further.

“You two had the whole place to yourselves AND on a night as beautiful as this! And you didn’t go for it?”

“I know!” Arms lying flat, exclaiming his sorrows into the dining table.

“I mean, how often does a perfect opportunity like that happen? Are you that thick in the head, Ilyushka!”

He raises his head to address her, “Yes, I know! Thank you Pasha, I get it!” Then presses his cheek to the smooth cloth covering. Taking a moment to calm the air, Julian reaches into his pocket and pulls out the ring he had bought a couple weeks prior to leaving, twirling it in his fingers.

He had spotted the red glint in a jeweller’s shop window on his way home from visiting the Palace, not the most flashy ring he’d ever seen but the tone of the ruby’s colour made him pause. When he had gotten home he couldn’t stop thinking about it for days, the image of it popping into his head from even a blush that would dust the cheeks of his partner. It’s strange to think about how something so small can hold such an overwhelming promise to it.

Passing a faint sigh, Portia pulls out a wooden chair across from Julian and sits, just watching the ring catch the glow of the gentle candle light. His mouth is set in a subtle frown and his silver eyes distant. “I’m sorry, I just supposed that when you had excused yourself it was because you were going to propose to them.” He still seems conflicted. She asks hesitantly, “do you... want to?”

Julian raises his head, “of course I do, I’ve never felt this way for anyone before. I’m over the moon for them!” He stops fiddling with the ring, placing it out in front of him and resting his chin against his palm, leaving the other to lie on the table, not saying more.

“And yet?” This makes him look away, thinking her question over.

“I think,” he pauses, “it may just be too soon to ask them. Considering everything that has happened between myself and Y/N, and even everyone else.” Julian’s gaze holds on the jewellery, and he shrugs, “I feel it may just be too much for them emotionally. We still have so much to process, it’s only been just over a month or two since things finally settled.” He sighs dejectedly, “even with this time of reprieve we’ve had, things have still been crazy with plans to rebuild the city, me running the clinic, Y/N running the shop and then traveling to Nevivon. It just still seems like it’s been so much to handle.” His eyebrows furrow and his frown becomes prominent, and he covers the ring with his hand, “I don’t even know if this is what they would want.”

Portia watches intently, mirroring Julian’s expression. She gently covers his hand with hers and leans over gaining his attention, his eyes widening, “trust me, they would say yes in a heartbeat. You two took down the Devil together for crying out loud! Give or take myself, Asra, Nadia, Maz and Nazali but that’s not my point,” she states as Julian raises a brow at her comment. “What I’m trying to say is that you two have already been to hell and back, so I wouldn’t doubt that if you went to them right now and asked, they wouldn’t hesitate to say yes.” Julian manages a smile at that, his cheeks reddening. The mood growing lighter at last. “I mean if we are being honest, you two have technically known each other for years, right?”

“Well, considering we did work together during the plague, you could say we have.” His smile falls a little, “although those memories are lost to them now.”

“And? Go make new ones with them then,” Portia lifts Julian’s hand, takes the ring and places it back, then she wraps his hand around it and holds it together, “we’re going to be here for a while yet so I’m sure there will be another chance to pop the question to Y/N and not have you sabotage yourself again.” She stands satisfied, leaving Julian to laugh at her jab.

“Hah, well I suppose you’re right.” He secures the ring back in his pocket, standing as well to head to bed.

“Of course I am, but pep-talks with you are draining so you got off lucky. Next time, I’ll kick the back of your knees and put you in a head-lock instead. It’s less effort and more effective.” With that, she heads out the door and to her allocated room, leaving Julian concerned but thankful.

He blows out the candle, allowing the moonlight to guide him to the room the Grandma’s gave to Y/N and himself to stay in while they are visiting Nevivon. Carefully, he turns the handle on the modest door and peeks in to make sure he doesn’t disturb his partner if they’re already asleep. And to his delighted surprise, they’re sitting against the head of the bed reading a book.

“What are you still doing awake, my dear? It’s late.” Despite telling them this, he’s glad he gets to say goodnight to them of course.

“Mmhmm, so I’m not allowed to stay up, but you are then?” A raised brow and a smirk grace their face as if mimicking Julian’s signature expression. Despite only living together for a relatively short amount of time, both have picked up mannerisms from the other. Bonding over little sayings that the apprentice may tell him where he now notices that he repeats in other conversations from time to time, while Y/N has been able to think of more quips to outwit Julian, and he is more than delighted when they can go into a back-and-forth teasing match until one of them ultimately loses. But it’s hardly ever a loss as one of them will usually glow red in the cheeks. Or that it will lead to other activities.

He grins at them.“Yes?”

They stare at him a little longer, until they break with a giggle. “Just come to bed already.”

Julian gingerly closes the door and strolls over to his side of the bed, sitting on the edge and tasks himself with getting his boots off and pyjamas on. “Portia seemed eager before I left.” Y/N states.

This makes Julian halt for a moment. Did they hear him and Portia talking in the kitchen? Were they too loud? Did Julian just ruin his chances at ever giving Y/N the ring while revealing his true feelings and now they want to leave him and never see him again? “Uhm, yeah. I suppose she was.”

“Is she okay?” Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap.

“She’s… fine. Yeah she just wanted to tell me about how there is going to be a special town event next week.” Julian has only managed to get his left boot off. Maybe if he made a run for it now he could steal a boat and travel to another city, take a new identity and start fresh to save himself from the grave he was currently digging for himself.

“Oh really! What’s the occasion?” Y/N now has their sole attention on this mystery event that Julian has sprung onto them and alarm bells are going off in his head wishing he had just said she was okay and called it a night.

He feels sweat running down his neck. “Uh, it’s a surprise.” Portia is going to kill him when he tells her about this. “Yes, a surprise event that they hold every now and then! I guess the town thinks that our arrival here is as good a time as any to hold it.” Finally Julian manages to get his other boot off and slip out of his clothes into his pajamas. Oh there is no going back now.

“That sounds amazing! I can’t wait for it, I’m sure it will be a night to remember.” Y/N snuffs out the candle with a whisper of magic while Julian slips into bed and opens his arms to embrace them as they settle their head on his chest, holding each other close and sharing a kiss goodnight.

Julian finishes by saying, “yes, a night to remember for sure.” He’s not sure if he will be able to rest well tonight.

He is very much in trouble.

#the arcana #the arcana julian #fanfic #yes I did stay up until 4am doing this #julian devorak x reader #the arcana x reader #portia devorak #the apprentice #julian devorak x mc

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onemistresstorulethemall · 3 years

Text

There is darkness in the light

This is nsfw, as well as 99% of my blog, oops

Ship: Mammon x F!Reader

Word count: 1859

“Oh, don’t tell me you got cold feet now. It was just getting interesting.”, you faked some sweetness into your tone, “Don’t fold now. Let’s raise. Indulge me.”, you shifted your legs, changing which was on top of which, moving them a little too slow, catching the attention of a few hungry demons, “Unless, of course, you’re scared of losing to a human…”

Your last line sparked something in the demon you were facing. He seemed offended. Good, you thought, that was the point. You needed him to play right into your trap.

“As if you could scare me.”, he snapped back, “Sure. I’ll humour you.”, he pushed a few more chips in the centre of the table.

Turning towards one of his friends, who already folded, he stated with a big smirk on his face:

“Bet she’d be set for life if she won my pocket money.”

His friend chuckled at the remark, but his eyes didn’t follow. You had beat him enough times for him to know better, but you’ve yet to destroy every crumb of pride, so he still kept up a confident façade. However, it meant little to you. All that counted in that moment was to win.

“So, what have you got, little one?”, the demon mocked you.

Your eyes burned through him and fell onto your date for the night. The second born was eyeing you from the bar, flashing a cheeky smile and raising his glass in your honour. Mammon knew you’d win this round. You both knew, actually. His pact mark burned in a particular way that let you know you were lucky. It came in handy at times like this or times when you had to guess answers to a RAD exam you didn’t study for.

“Please, do the honours.”, your attention shifted to the demon in front of you.

A pair of kings. Not bad, but not good either. At least, not good enough. However, you were here to have fun, so you faked defeat.

“My…That’s a good hand.”, you bit your lip and frowned.

At that point in time, a bunch of demons gathered around your table, waiting to see the results. Funny enough, demons made bets on who would win.

“Wish you backed away when you could, huh?”, your opponent lit up a cigarette.

“I…”, you looked down before revealing your cards, “I could ask you the same question.”, you glued your gaze to his as a huge grin spread across your face.

Three aces. You won.

“Motherfucker…”, he hissed while exhaling the smoke.

While you pulled the chips towards you the demons gathered around you loudly expressed their emotions. Some cursed, some cheered, but it mattered little to you.

Your opponent felt a tap on the shoulder. A woman handed him a glass of demonus and ruffled his hair.

“Lost to Mammon’s girl again?”, she laughed, “You should’ve known better.”

Happy with your earnings for the night, you left the table and headed towards the bar. When close enough to Mammon, your hands found their way around his neck. You leaned in close, your lips almost touching, breathing heavily, tension thick enough you could cut it with a knife.

“Tell me…”, you bit your lip, “Did you manage?”, your eyes full of desire.

“Yeah, baby, let’s get outta here.”, his smirk made your knees weak.

After you cashed in your gains, both of you got into Mammon’s car and the moment the door closed, you started laughing, no longer being able to contain it.

“Fucking hell, I can’t believe how dumb they are!”

You turned around to face the blue-eyed demon and cupped his cheeks, pulling him in to kiss him forcefully. Your hands knew no boundaries and travelled across his entire body, sneaking under clothes to feel his warm skin, grabbing with unsatiated hunger while your nails dug into his soft flesh. He was far from shy as well, high on the smell of money and one too many glasses of demonus. One of his hands rested on the back of your head, tangled into your hair a bit too tight, as if to make sure you weren’t going anywhere, while the other curiously explored your body, travelling from your waist to your ass and your thighs, making its way under your dress.

When you broke off the kiss, a strig of saliva still connected your mouths. Panting, you smirked and dragged your nails across his ribs.

“Let’s get out of here.”, you suggested.

“You wanna go home already?”, he seemed confused.

“No, silly. Let’s get a hotel room, see how much we made.”

Mammon seemed to like the idea, speeding up after planting a kiss on your lips one last time.

It was overwhelming. The cold wind blowing your hair around from the parted window, Mammon’s hand on your thigh occasionally squeezing and the thrill of accomplishing your plan.

Soon enough you got pulled up to a hotel and rushed into the room, unbearable to wait a second longer. You threw your heels on the floor quickly and opened up your purse to let a wave of grimm flow onto the bed.

Grinning, you turned to face Mammon who pulled around six wallets, three watches and a few pieces of jewellery from his pockets.

“Fuck, I can’t believe this worked…”, you finally broke the spell.

“Oh, of course it worked. You put on quite a nice show, princess. With your plan and my skills, it couldn’t go any other way.”

He emptied the contents of the wallets onto the bed.

It was your idea, actually. Mammon played first. You made quite a scene after he lost all his money and demanded that he backs off for the night. Instead, you asked he let you play a few games before you leave. He complied. You tried your best to make the matches entertaining and attract as much attention as you could. When people gathered around, Mammon used the opening to empty their pockets. It was all premeditated and you couldn’t believe you actually pulled it off.

“Do ya wanna count them?”, he asked.

As a response, you pushed him onto the grimm-filled bed and began to kiss his neck.

“Fuck…”, he hissed in surprise.

You loved being on top, having control over him, making him squirm under you and enjoying his every reaction. However, tonight, you wanted him to completely take over you. All you needed to do was to bring him to his breaking point.

Without hesitation, you reached for his jeans, unbuttoning them pulling them off along with his boxers.

“Shit, someone’s eager.”

“Mmm, you bet I am.”

You began to sloppily lick along his shaft, making sure it’s nice and wet before taking all of his length down your throat in one go.

“F-fuck, gimmie a warning first.”

You raised your head, drool dripping from your mouth, and looked into his ocean eyes.

“Gotta serve my king well, right?”

After a quick smile, you resumed to pleasuring your favourite demon. This time, slower, rolling your tongue around his tip and using a hand to stroke the rest.

“Shit…”, he breathed out, “You’re perfect.”

His hand found its way into your hair, pushing and pulling, controlling the pace. At this point it was less of a blowjob and more of a facefuck. Drool kept dripping from your lips and filled the room of wet, sloppy sounds. You couldn’t help but moan as he used your mouth. Mammon’s free hand bunched up the sheets and along with it a bunch of bills. That was probably the last drop for him cause he pulled onto your hair and freed your mouth. As if you weighted nothing, he switched the positions, pulling you under him before beginning to undress you. Your dress hit the floor and so did your panties.

His eyes were full of desire as he grabbed your waist and pulled you into a kiss. In the process, a bunch of grimm ended up on your stomach. When Mammon broke the kiss and leaned back his cock twitched when faced with the view.

Between your legs, his hand began to play with your wet folds, making you arch your back.

“You’re my most prized possession. Fuck, it’s like you were made for me…”

His fingers entered you, moving inside, hitting just the right spots. Your hips gained a mind of their own and moved without you even thinking about it.

“Doncha think so, y/n? That ya belong to me…”

His lips fell onto your neck before you even had a chance to reply. His teeth sank into your flesh, marking you as his own in yet another way.

When his thumb traced circles on your clit, a cry escaped your lips and you knew you reached your breaking point.

“Mammon if you don’t fuck me right this second…”

“You’ll what? Whine?”

“Fuck, please…”

Without another exchange, he flipped you around, turning you on your stomach before aligning himself to your entrance.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, y/n”

That was the last thing you heard before your head was pushed into a pile of grimm while his cock slowly entered you.

“Don’t fucking be gentle!”, you warned him, “Be as rough as you can.”

“You’ll break”, he chuckled.

“Good.”

He grabbed your hands by the wrist and pinned them to your back, so you had no choice but to sit there and take it. Mammon’s movements became rougher and faster while your moans became louder.

“You’re taking me so well, fuck…”

You weren’t half as coherent. You could only alternate between “Mammon” and “Fuck”. His free hand reached between your legs and rubbed against your clit in an attempt to relive all the built up tension. Your legs started to shake and your walls spasmed around his cock as you came undone. The demon did not slow down at all. Instead, his grip on your wrists became tighter and his thrusts deeper, chasing his own release. Soon enough, he spilled inside of you with a loud groan before falling onto his back next to you.

Still in a daze, you were a bit shocked when Mammon pulled you into an embrace and kissed the top of your head.

“Ya know… With your cash, there must be like a hundred thousand grimm here.”, he turned to face you, “How about we clean up and spend them all?”

Tomorrow you were bound to get back to the house of lamentation at some point. You’d have to do your homework, cook dinner as it was your turn and help Lucifer with a few documents. Basically, you had to take care of your responsibilities and be a good girl. So, of course, you nodded. Mammon was going to spend all the money regardless, so you took the chance to go wild and he was the only one you could go wild with. Your first demon, in every sense of the word. The only one who knew about the darkness in your soul and cherished it. He was both your chaos and your anchor. Your temptation and your guardian. Your sin and your virtue. He was yours, your Mammon.

#obey me!#shall we date #obey me! shall we date?#obey me mammon #mammon x reader #shall we date mammon #obey me! mammon #mammon x mc #smut #the smuttier the better #obey me smut

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admiringlove · 3 years

Text

doubt

+pairing: tsukishima kei x reader

+synopsis: tsukki, the boy you’re desperately in love with. the boy who holds your hand softly as the two of you walk home together from school. the only question is, does the boy love you back just as much as you love him?

+genre: angst; fluff.

+word count: 1.6k

+warnings: none.

+author’s notes: this is an older fic, please note that my writing style has gotten better and i am producing newer fics that are better than this one. not that this fic is necessarily bad(it’s good i hope) but just my style has improved much more.

— request.

HIYA! I saw the request were open so I just wanted a full angsty Tsukki imagine. Do anything you want, I want that ANGST :DD

You and Tsukki had been dating for the past few months. Yamaguchi, being the neutral friend of the group, would always come to the rescue if the two of you had a fight or need help in talking to one another.

However, tonight was different. The dusk comes as a promise of starlight, of those eminent pearls of the twilight that sit as if cushioned upon pure black velvet. The heat of the day has ebbed to a soothing warmth. The sunshine has lost its luster, and the colors of the atmosphere are softened.

You, a teenager who had just gotten a 76-percent in Physics, was itching to find some comfort. You had pulled countless all-nighters for these exams. You had stayed up so many nights studying the reflecting rays and the incident rays and the formulas that you were just disappointed in yourself. You were in a bad mood already; expecting some calming words from Tadashi or Kei, you walk towards the volleyball gymnasium to find Tsukki, who looked so concentrated on the practice match being played.

The boys were practicing in so much perspiration and purpose, that you felt like simply watching them excel from afar. You sighed as Sugawara and Daichi greeted you before ending practice ten minutes earlier than usual, as everyone seemed drained. You waited patiently as the boys went to get changed, Hinata giving you a high-five and complimenting you before leaving.

"I'll walk you home after changing, will you wait for me?" Kei says as he picks up his bag and slings it over his shoulder. You nod, "Sure thing, Kei."

The blond walks over to the club room with everyone else, and you notice that Kei had left a shirt in the gym.

You headed to pick up Tsukishima's shirt that he had left behind. And as you headed up the stairs of the club room, you could overhear Tsukishima and Yamaguchi talking.

Talking about... you?

"Tsukki, shush. They're your [S/O]," Yamaguchi mumbles with paranoia evident in his tone. Tsukishima scoffs halfheartedly, looking away. He rolls his amber eyes in ignorance and continues, "They lied saying they studied for the Physics exam. Why would they want to lie about studying? It's them that got the lowest grade of the class, not me."

You hide next to the half-open door—heart breaking into pieces as you hear Tsukki say those words—and Yamaguchi gasps slightly when he sees you. You gesture him to keep quiet as you wanted to hear what Kei had to say about you. Truth is, you felt as if he was slowly falling out of love with you. He never gave you any song recommendations anymore, he never walked home with you, he never even bothered to talk to you, which was what pained you even more.

“Tsukishima, why would you say that about your own partner?” Suga asked to lighten the mood a little, but Tsukishima only replied, “I don’t like it when people lie to me.”

And then, the boy continued.

"It's annoying to even be with them, at this point. They're clingy, and—"

You clutch the shirt in your palm tightly, walking away. You didn't want to hear anymore. Rapidly blinking to stop the tears brimming at the corner of your eyes, you sped up your pace. Your shoulders dropped in resignation as you tightened your chapped lips in a straight line. You bit down on the inside of your cheek, as you grabbed your backpack and began the walk towards your home. What could you do, anyway? Beg him to stay with you a little longer? Obviously not, that would make you look desperate.

But what could you do, anyway? You didn't want to admit it, but you were desperate. You were desperately in love with the sarcastic remarks, the signature smirk, the teasing eyes, the nonchalant "good morning, [Y/N]-chan", the recommendations of songs that would blow your mind, the sweet midnight trips to your house just because he was bored, the small lingering kisses that would make you want more, and what else? There was so much about Tsukishima Kei that you were in love with. You couldn't put it into words even if you tried. You imagined a future with him even though the two of you were high-school freshmen.

You were alone, walking the empty streets as tears welled up from deep inside your heart and coursed down your cheeks. Like a warm waterfall in the middle of autumn. You were being killed by your own unruly thoughts that were getting the best of you. How was he going to break up with you? Was this it? Was he simply never going to talk to you again?

You finally got home, shrugging your mother off saying that you weren't in the mood for dinner as you wiped your tears and ran up the stairs.

You avoided Tsukishima for the whole week. After all, what good does a clingy [S/O] do other than annoying their partner?

"[Y/N]!" you hear Tadashi's voice echo through the corridor just as you're about to leave. You stayed behind for a couple of extra minutes because you liked the soothing silence your school provided. The bell ringing, the leaves of the trees rustling, the smell of books and chalk, the nostalgic feeling overwhelming you of memories buried deep.

The school was a safe place without anyone around.

"Ah, Tadashi!" you grinned, you grabbed your belongings and rushed over to the boy, greeting him once again. He rubs the back of his neck nervously as he asks, "You haven't talked to Tsukki all week, have you?"

"Oh, I haven't? I didn't notice," you chuckle nervously, obviously knowing that Yamaguchi was concerned about you since the day he had seen you overhear his conversation.

What you didn't know, was that Tsukishima was standing merely five feet away, hidden inside a classroom. He was quizzically standing there, not moving an inch so he could hear what you had to say. Did you want to break up with him? Was that why you hadn't initiated a single conversation with him? Was that why you would leave your home earlier than usual so you could walk without him? Was that why you wouldn't even bother to look at his message(even though he had only tried to contact you twice—one text, and one call)?

"[Y/N], I know you heard when Tsukki complained about your grade in the Physics exam," Tadashi grimaced, gritting his teeth as he tried to look away from you. You widened your eyes as you tried to find a suitable explanation that would fix the problem in front of you.

Tsukishima, on the other hand, was shocked. He didn’t know you were there that day. His hands were in his hair as he slowly sunk to his knees. His breathing becoming more rigid, more uneven as his mind went frantic. You had heard him call you clingy. You had heard him openly criticize you in front of the whole team. You had heard him say such mean things about you.

He couldn't fathom what you were feeling.

"It's not like I care about Physics anyway," you giggle, trying to lighten the mood, "Even if I got a low score, I still passed."

"Can you not joke around?" Yamaguchi asked in a deadpan tone that made you get goosebumps. You sighed, looking at him right in the eye, and claimed, "The other option is I cry and face my overwhelming sadness that my own boyfriend called me clingy and dumb even though I try so hard to be a person he deserves, so no."

To say that Tadashi was taken aback, was an understatement. You smiled as you let out a dry chuckle, and walked away.

That night, Tsukishima Kei was the one crying himself to sleep.

"Good morning, [Y/N]-chan," you heard an all-too-familiar voice behind you as you walked out to buy groceries. You stopped in your tracks, [E/C] eyes widening as you let out an unintentional hum.

"Can we talk?" he asked. You turned around hesitantly to see that his features no longer displayed the desultory expression he used to display. His forbearance was dying by the passing minute—he was worried as he stepped toward you, but stopped as he witnessed you take a step back.

His amber eyes searched for some comfort in yours, but he couldn't find himself to look at your face—as if your hurt expression would break him down even more. He never meant to hurt you with his snarky laid-back words. He didn't even mean most of them.

"I'm sorry if I have been a clingy or annoying [S/O], Tsukishima," you mumble, kicking a pebble lightly. It doesn't even pain you to say it anymore—your voice is calm and emollient as if you didn't mind saying these words. He grimaced at the fact that you didn’t call him “Kei” as his guilt uproared even more.

Your tone caused him to wince as he looked up at your face. There was no sign of apathy, like your tone. Instead, your eyes were shut tightly, as if you were trying to stop yourself from having a breakdown right there. He stepped closer to you, hoping that you wouldn't walk away this time, as he placed a palm on your head—gently fiddling with the strands of your [H/C] hair. His touch is like embrocation; the sudden relief of all pain cast inside has been let out along with a single tear taking its course on your cheek.

Your furtive façade breaking down slowly as he held you in his long, yet firm arms. You were like a gossamer—so delicate, that Kei was scared he'd break you.

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn’t have said those things about you. I shouldn’t have ignored you," he mumbled into your hair as he embraced you tightly. You shook your head in disagreement as you muffled out a reply, "I was the one that didn't do well. It's my fault."

"You did your best," he mused. You hummed indulgently, as he held your hand in his, "I'm walking you to wherever you're headed."

"You don't even know where I'm going," you chuckled out, as the boy smiled down at you, "So? I meant it when I said I’d follow you anywhere when we began dating.”

#tsukishima kei #tsukki #haikyuu tsukishima #tsukishima x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyu #haikyuu #haikyū!!#haikyuu angst #haikyu x reader #tsukishima oneshot #tsukishima imagine #tsukki angst #tsukishima angst

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goldentournesol · 4 years

Text

Double Whammy

(Spencer Reid x Reader)

The one where Reader gets a nasty cold and is on her period at the same time, so Spencer takes care of her.

Length: 2.6k

A/N: thank you for the request @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto ! I enjoyed writing this one, IT’S SO FLUFFY!

masterlist

Sometimes, the stars align and something favorable happens. Other times, the stars want nothing to do with each other and every possible thing that less than favorable happens. Unfortunately, the latter had been Y/N’s case for the past two days. She’d been fighting off a nasty, terrible cold. She didn’t get sick often, but when she did, it felt like her body’s main goal was to punish her for not being careful enough rather than heal itself. Her bones ached and her nose was blocked in a way that made her feel as though she’d never breathe properly again. On top of all that, her uterus made sure to be as unforgiving as possible as the dreaded time of the month rolled around. She could barely keep her eyes open as her body fought through the exhaustion that came with the double-whammy.

It was around 4 in the afternoon and Y/N had barely left the bed at all. She wished for some type of relief from her cramps but it just wasn’t coming. Her migraine wasn’t helping her out either. She couldn’t even remember the last time she had any water to drink.

“Hello?” She croaked into the phone with a heavy cough. It came as a surprise to her that she even managed to let out a single word, although it sounded more like ‘bellow’ than ‘hello’.

“Y/N! How are you feeling today, my love?” Spencer’s chipper voice boomed through the speaker.

“Not much better to be honest.” She murmured into the phone which was laying on the pillow that Spencer slept on, barely able to keep her puffy eyes open. He heard her blow her nose and she uttered a small apology, knowing that must not have been pleasant to hear over the phone. He felt his heart twist in his chest, knowing she was feeling so under the weather and not be able to make her feel better.

He was currently on a case somewhere in the deserts of California. She hadn’t caught the cold yet when he left. She knew that he would have stayed with her if she’d caught it before he left, which would have made her feel like the biggest burden there was and she also knew that her boyfriend wasn’t the type to take no for an answer.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. But, I have great news. We closed the case, I’m getting on the jet now. I should be home in no time.” He says softly and she can feel a small smile fighting its way onto her face.

“That’s great, Spence…” she trailed off, losing more energy by the second, “Get home safe, love you.”

“Love you more.” Spencer hung up and felt his shoulders drop in defeat before making his way back to his team as they climbed onto the jet. The guilt he felt for leaving her alone was overwhelming. He should be there for her, making her feel better. He knew she hated asking for help, but he couldn’t help but wonder if she’d taken care of herself at all. He guessed he’d find out soon enough.

It felt wrong walking in and finding their apartment void of any light or sound. Usually, there was some sort of noise or light coming from either a TV or a phone. He quietly made his way over to the bedroom and heard her snores. He sighed in relief, knowing she was at least resting. Spencer made his way over to the kitchen and figured she must have been starving. There was no evidence of any food or drink anywhere. He wondered when the last time she ingested something was.

He made a quick call to Rossi, unsure of his cooking skills. He checked the fridge and pantry for the necessary ingredients and attempted to make chicken noodle soup with whatever they had available. He yawned as he cut up the vegetables, but quickly fought the sleep to continue cooking. He heard her soft snores stop and he peeked his head into the dark room again.

“Spence?” She managed to say softly, the thick covers muffling her voice.

“Hey, sweetheart. I’m here.” He smiled as he approached their bed and turned on the lamp by their bedside. She winced at the sudden brightness and he quickly tried to block the light with his body to provide her eyes with some relief.

“How are you feeling?” He asked softly as he took a seat at the edge of the bed. He took in her puffy eyes and red nose and wondered how she could still look so cute. Her bottom lip jutted out slightly and shook her head.

“I feel like absolute shit.” She mumbled and his heart dropped in his chest.

“Have you had anything to eat...or drink?” He bit his lip, already knowing the answer. She shook her head again softly, almost guilty.

“Alright, I’m making you some soup. I think a hot shower will make you feel a lot better, Y/N/N. Come on, out of bed.” he tried to coax her with his hands. She only peered back at him over the duvet with tired eyes and small hands that wrapped around the edge of the duvet, Spencer found himself reveling in her adorable appearance and feeling bad about ruining her comfort, but he knew she probably stayed in bed all day. Spencer raised his eyebrows at her when she didn’t move. He smiled with relief when she didn’t fight him as he gently pulled back the covers from over her.

“Come here, baby.” He motioned for her to come closer into his embrace. She slowly wrapped her arms around him and he lifted her out of bed, her legs locking behind his waist. He heard her sniffle into his neck as he carried her to the bathroom, he didn’t know whether she was crying or if it was just from the cold. He was too good to her, she didn’t know what she did to deserve such a compassionate partner, but she thanked the universe for allowing her to have him. Perhaps a tear or two managed to slip out of her eyes and into Spencer’s hair. Spencer turned his head slightly to press a kiss to her temple, murmuring into her hair, “I’ve got you, sweetheart.” He set her down as gently as he could and began to run the hot water.

“Okay, this should be perfect for decongesting your nasal pathways and loosening up the phlegm--” he stopped himself, knowing her head was probably pounding, “The soup should be ready by the time you finish your shower. If you need anything, I’ll be right outside.” He squeezed her shoulders and she sent him a tearful smile.

As he closed the bathroom door, he took notice of a red patch of blood on the bed sheet on the mattress. He hastily checked his phone for the date and realized that her monthly visitor would be in fact--visiting. Spencer’s heart wrenched yet again as he could only imagine how horrible she really felt at the moment. He didn’t hesitate to change the sheets and clean the mattress of any remnants before neatly restoring order to the bed. He wanted to make sure she was taken care of, especially since he’d been away for so long.

Somehow, he’d lost track of the pot that was currently boiling over the stove. He rushed to it, thankfully catching the pot right before it overflowed. He brought a spoon up to his lips and immediately winced at the lack of flavor. Spencer added some salt and continued to stir as he heard soft footsteps behind him. Y/N hugged his waist from behind silently and smushed her face against his back. Spencer smiled widely as he took the soup off the heat and swiveled around to wrap his arms around her. She noticed that he’d changed the sheets and made the bed and she honestly thought she was about to cry again.

“I missed you.” She mumbled into his shirt. Spencer kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back.

“I missed you way more. I’m so sorry for being away while you’ve been--” He began to apologize but was interrupted by her frantically shaking her head.

“No, no, no. Don’t apologize. I’m just glad you’re back.” The words barely made it past her lips, her voice hoarse. She lifted her head from his chest to gaze at him and they both adoringly stared at each other for a bit too long. He reluctantly pulled away from the embrace to ladle some soup into a bowl while it was still hot. He made himself a bowl as well since he hadn’t had any dinner. She sighed heavily as she sat at the kitchen table.

“What’s wrong?” Spencer asked, setting the two bowls down.

“I...I don’t feel like eating.” She pouted again, Spencer knew this was the cold talking.

“I don’t think you want to hear me list the benefits of soup when you have a cold.” Spencer teased, even though he knew she loved his info-dumps. She rolled her eyes playfully, smiling at him. “Besides, you haven’t eaten or drank anything in...judging by the color of your tongue and lips, around 16 hours. You need something in your system so you can take some medication to make you feel better, sweetheart.” He said as he hungrily spooned soup into his mouth. It really wasn’t that good, but it’d do the job.

She nodded, giving in and taking her first spoonful of soup. She giggled right after it.

“I know it’s not that good.” Spencer laughed.

“I didn’t say that!” She laughed back at him. She was happy to finally get out of the rut she was in and who would be able to do that better than Spencer? “Honestly, Spencer, it’s pretty good.”

“If you say so.” He grinned and took her hand over the table. They sipped their soup in a comfortable silence and she even got up to ladle a second helping of soup. It was the first thing she’d eaten in a while and her stomach appreciated the warmth.

“Do you need me to get you anything from the store?” he asked later as he put both their dishes away. He brought her some medicine for her cold and a cup of water, motioning for her to take them. He also made sure to make her some chamomile tea to help ease the cramps.

She nodded sheepishly, taking the medicine, “Chocolate.”

He laughed, fully expecting the response. “Alright, how about you set up a movie and drink your tea? I won’t take long.” He pressed a firm kiss to her forehead and walked towards the door.

“Spencer!” She called after him, sniffling again and wiping at her nose.

“Yeah?” He called back, slipping on his shoes.

“I also need pads!” She reminded him and he laughed.

“Okay, anything else?”

“Yes! I love you.”

“I love you, too.” He grinned as he made his way to the store.

She grabbed her cup of tea and plopped down onto the couch, setting up a movie that wouldn’t agitate her headache. As Spencer promised, he was back quickly. He changed into something comfortable and made his way over to the couch with her chocolate in his hand. She smiled gratefully as she unwrapped it and devoured half of it. Spencer could only watch with adoration.

“How is it?” he asked, watching her lick the corner of her lips, trying to get all the chocolate she possibly could.

“It’s the best thing I’ve had all day, Spence.” She threw herself in his arms, her head resting soundly on his chest, “Besides this, of course.” Spencer smiled as wide as he could as he rubbed her back. She pulled her head off his chest to stare at him in wonder.

“I will never get over how lucky I am to have you.” She whispered softly and Spencer resisted the tears threatening to rise in his eyes. He just sent her a watery smile and shook his head in disbelief, not trusting his words. He had no idea where he would even begin to describe how lucky he felt to have her. She placed a soft hand on the side of his neck to pull his cheek closer to kiss it, she would have kissed his lips but she didn’t want him to get sick. Her fingers threaded through his hair as she admired him. At this point, the movie was long forgotten, she wasn’t even sure she wanted to watch it.

“Hm, it’s getting long.” She twirled a piece around her fingers. Spencer nodded as he stared back at her.

“Do you...want to braid it?” He asked tentatively, instantly noticing how her face beamed at the idea. She’d always asked him if she could braid it for him but he always refused. But looking at her now, he’d let her do anything she wanted, especially if it meant making her feel better.

“Really?! You mean it? You’re not just offering because you pity me?” She squeaked excitedly.

“Well...that’s only part of it.” He laughed and rolled his eyes. She gasped and got up to walk to their bedroom to get a comb and some hair ties. This was the most energized she’d been since Spencer had seen her and he wasn’t about to deny that seeing her excited made it worth whatever was about to happen.

“Okay, you’re gonna have to sit on the floor. You’re too tall for me.” She said as she took her seat on the couch. Spencer moved to the floor and sat down between her legs. Her fingers threaded through his mop of curls and he instantly relaxed at her touch. She began to gently comb through his tangles, careful not to hurt him. He really didn’t mind, it brought him inexplicable peace, especially after a long day.

“Are you gonna fall asleep on me now?” She teased as she noticed his closed eyes and the way his head felt heavier against her hands.

“Mmm, I might.” He hummed.

She giggled and separated his hair into four sections, French braiding each one. It was nice to have a distraction. The only thing keeping Spencer’s head propped up was her knee and she thought he genuinely fell asleep until he felt the absence of her fingers in his hair.

“Are you done?” He asked quietly, his hand coming up to feel the braids. He took it as a yes when she didn’t smack his hand away. “Y/N, they feel so cool. I have to see.” He got up from his spot with a grunt and went into the bathroom to check himself out.

“I don’t think it suits me.” He laughed, unconvinced at his appearance. He brushed his teeth while he was at it. She laughed and shook her head in response, getting ready for bed as well.

“I personally think you look great! You should sleep with them in and we can see what your hair will look like in the morning.” She tried to reason with him, she just really didn’t want him to take them out so soon. He shook his head at her once again and turned the TV off with a huge yawn.

“Come on, Spence, let’s get in bed.” She grabbed his hand and took him to the bed. They instinctively wrapped their arms around one another.

Spencer whispered in her ear, “Are you feeling any better, sweetheart?”

She nodded against him, “Thank you, Spencer. I love you so much.” He smiled.

“I love you, more. Goodnight, Y/N.” She was already out like a light before she could respond.

#spencer x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fanfic #dr spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid one shot #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid masterlist #cm

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oingo233 · 3 years

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Rapture is a Boy (8)

Summary: Remus and you have always had a playful, loving relationship but his behavior around the full moon leads you to assume the worst. A huge fight ends with the two of you heartbroken. Will Remus reveal the truth behind his behavior? And will you still love him afterwards or has he truly lost you forever?

Young Remus Lupin x Reader(neutral)

Warning: FLUFF, so much fluff you could drown in it, self-doubt (brief)

Authors Note: This is the last part, which is crazy to me, I truly hope yall love it. This series is dear to my heart because it has allowed me to meet and talk to you and so many other amazing people! You all mean so much to me, and Remus is my lil baby too. I can’t even express how much I appreciate and love you all <3

Word Count: 5k

Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven

Part Eight

****A Stag, a Rat and a Dog***

Remus POV

“That was-” Peter couldn’t even finish his sentence, he just laughed, he laughed so loud it was hard not to join in with him. James pat his back and nodded, wiping some of the blue glitter off on his shirt.

“Right, mate.” he agreed. Sirius was bouncing in his spot, none of our smiles breaking or dimming. “Another notch under the belt of our legacy of awesome,” he all but sang, all of our cheeks still flushed from this morning. He hit Sirius’s arm and they began to race up the stairs, Peter and I followed, jogging after them. “Lily loved it too!” he added, smiling even bigger at just the thought of her, he was beating Sirius.

We all stopped running and Sirius was scowling, he lost, we all stood at the portrait when Sirius turned to me. “Worked well on (Y/N) too,” he stated, smirking at me and making a sexual motion with his hips, James laughed and I pushed him. “Ew, your palms are sweaty.”

“We’ll excuse me, ABBA sweats no doubt after giving the performance of a life time.” I say while James says the word and the painting opens for us. “Besides, it has worked for now. But they are still oblivious to the truth. I might lose them all over again, once they know.”

The mood seemed to darken at this realization. Not everyone is as understanding about my condition as the boys. That’s the real reason I couldn’t stop sweating, and if the boys looked close enough they’d see I couldn’t stop shaking ever so slightly too. I just got (Y/N) back, I’m not sure how well I’d be able to cope with losing them a second, and final time. My heart broke just at the thought, and at the very realization that I might have to prepare myself for such an outcome.

“Mate, (Y/N) is one of the people in this world that loves you most. Besides us of course,” James smiled softly, trying to lighten the mood whenever he could, “I doubt, that anything could make them think differently of you. You’re not just your condition. You’re Remus feckin Lupin!” The other boys cheered in agreement as we stepped into our dorms, Peter even went as far as rubbing my shoulders to build up my confidence, he saw a trainer do it to a wrestler on muggle TV once.

“And we’ve got a romantic feckin plan!” Peter cheers, still excited about what is yet to happen. I swallow thickly once more, this day could be one of the best in a while, or the absolute worst. I guess we’ll know tonight.

“Yes, and are you guys sure you are okay with this?” I ask, for the fifth time. James rolls his eyes, and Sirius bangs his head on the dorm room wall.

“Yes, Moony. Yes. Yes. Yes. We are okay with this for the millionth time. (Y/N) is our friend too, and all we want is to see the lot of ya happy again, so will ya shut up about it. We already agreed, mate,” Sirius says, looking up just barely lifting his head from the wall.

“And we don’t like lying to (Y/N) either,” James says, Peter nods with each word falling from their lips, as he tugs on pants and grabs a new, not bedazzled, robe.

We were still talking and going over plans for tonight when we left for first period. The common room was quite expect for our meshed whispers and loud footfalls, it wasn’t until the painting door swung open that we heard another sound. An all too familiar sound.

Professor McGonagall cleared her throat before us. Her hands folded in at her chest and her pointed eyes trained on us, unblinking. We all swallowed thickly, our fear and respect for her almost overwhelmed our courage and friendliness towards her. Almost.

“Did ya enjoy the concert, Minnie? I was singing just for you.” Sirius said, smiling and trying not to laugh as her expression remained unmoving. James joined in and I nearly rolled my eyes, but a smile found it’s way onto my lips nonetheless.

“Yeah, we saw ya a-tap-tap-tappy your toes!” He says, doing a little dance. I was amazed by her ability to not even crack a smile at our enthusiasm, but then again, this was nothing new to her. “ABBA gets to the best of us doesn’t it?” As if on cue, Sirius was speaking again. I fought my smile and faked a sullen expression, fingers crossed behind my back, this was the part where one of us tried to weasel our way out of trouble.

“Exactly, our hearts were in it Professor, truly we had good reason and we weren’t hurting anyone. Shame. Just a shame Dumbledore gave us detention, any more severe punishment just wouldn’t make any sense.” She raised a brow and in a last attempt I put in a word of my own.

“But you’re always so sensible Ms. McGonagall. I’m sure your punishment for us will be well-deserved. Perhaps our outfits were too flashy?” Peter chuckles beside me, and shows her the inside of his robe.

“But this one isn’t at all. Ya see?” He shows her adamantly until she raises a hand and we are drowning in silence, she made us sweat in our palms and neck before speaking.

“Yes. It appears your shenanigans are over. But Lucy is still in the hospital wing scrubbing at her skin, the smell is pungent and unmoving. It seems, Sirius,” She turns to face him, his adam apple bobs, “You did hurt someone. The real shame is that you don’t seem bothered by that fact. Follow me, boys.” She said, turning on us, her robes nearly swinging up and hitting our shins. We follow wordlessly and with our heads down, her words bothered us a little, what really stung was the disappointment on her face and in her frown. (Though Sirius swears he heard her singing along).

She went to Peter’s class first, he went to follow her inside but she raised a hand and said “Oh, you won’t be going to class this morning, Mr.Pettigrew.” She excused Peter herself, whispering into the teachers ear. My heart sank at the realization that I would not be seeing (Y/N) again this morning, James eyes me, my mood obviously changed. I couldn’t even spend any time with them before tonight, our lunch would serve as detention as well. I might never get to see them again after tonight, couldn’t even enjoy this little time I have before the truth is out. I won’t be able to be at peace until tonight or maybe even after, because who will love a monster?

For the rest of the morning we were locked in McGonagall’s empty classroom, writing out letters of apology to be given to Lucy in person later that day. And attempting to come up with a charm or some potion that would reverse the long lasting affect of the Stink Bombs that we have created. Wouldn’t be a marauders prank unless everything was well crafted, would it? But now, our little spell seems to be our downfall. Luckily, we found the right reversion potion, and it was taken to Madame Pom. immediately. By the time we were allowed to leave, the bell for second period had just rang.

I sat through my classes with sweaty hands, and bouncing legs. I agonized in the silence of detention about all that could go wrong, several times I re-debated whether I should really tell (Y/N) the truth, but it was clear that I needed too. I have lied for too long, and it has cost me too much. The truth will set me free...or at least I hope it will. I sat through my very last classes feeling both sick, and determined. Before we knew it, it was dinner time and James, Sirius, Peter and I snuck out of the castle for our final act of salvation. Our last attempt to make things right.

Your POV

The ground was rocky and uneven below my feet, between the clumps of dirt and hidden rocks this trip to Hagrids hut felt more like a mountain climbing experience than anything else. But my breathing was not ragged and exaggerated because of the walk, no, it was because ever since this morning my heart has been beating out of control. I’ve been breathless and filled with both anxiety and warmth since Remus kissed my cheek and handed me this note.

Tonight will mark either the end or the fresh start of our relationship, of our friendship...of our love.

My head is spinning as I stumble over a pumpkin root. What has he been hiding from me? Is it something bad, or big, or maybe something he is just blowing way out of proportion? What if the truth pulls us apart even more than the lies?

I shake my head in an attempt to free myself of this anxiety that swells in my stomach like a churning sea. Whatever it is, I will face it with patience and love, but also self-respect. I repeat this to myself until before I know it, I am at Hagrids hut. The walls of his house seemed to mountain over me, it smelled strongly of firewhiskey, burning firewood,rich dirt and sweet pumpkins. The smell did wonders in calming my mind, but I rather large frown makes its way onto my face as I look around. There was absolutely no one in sight.

I cuss under my breath. Maybe this is the wrong place. Maybe Remus is late? I chew at my bottom lip and take a few large steps around the hut, my eyes keep going back to analyze the trees of the forest. The shadows of the forbidden forest seemed to reach for me. It called for me. As if it was a whirlpool sucking me in I stepped towards it, staring into the layers of dark, large trees.

I held my breath as a bush by the very edge of the forest shook, rustling leaves and snapping twigs filled the brisk night air. I shivered, whether it was from the cold or the sudden fear I was not sure, but I did not have time to debate my feelings because suddenly, a canopy of dark green vines, hanging from the trees shifted.

Large, cream horns parted the vines and drooping tree leaves, a particular branch got stuck on the intricate swirling of the horns and snapped completely as the creature stepped further from the shadows, revealing itself to me.

A beautiful Stag stood proud, it’s thick coat shone under the moonlight, it’s chest puffed out at me with pride. The horns only added to it’s graceful height, but it’s eyes are what truly took my breath away. Those round, warm eyes they were so human. So familiar. Before I could debate it any further, the Stag stamped it’s hoof in the dirt softly, it snorted and white air swirled around it’s soft face. Only then did I notice the beautiful yellow rose, plucked from a bush and resting at it’s front legs.

I bring a shaky hand to my mouth, barely able to comprehended the wave of emotions that nearly knock me to my feet. This was of Remus’s doing. But...how? The Stag inclines it’s head curiously at me to the right, it’s large ears flicking with some sort of impatience, or unrest. Only then did I fully seem to understand the familiarity of this creature.

“James?” I gasp. The Stag seems to stand even taller at me, and...smiles. With my mouth still hanging wide open I let out a boisterous laugh. “James!” I almost yell, the Stag snorts again and leans it’s head down, using his nose to push the rose towards me. The movement doesn’t help me get over my shock, but it stirs me into action. I begin to cautiously walk forwards, and as I do the Stag er, James, picks up the rose between it’s teeth, when I am close enough he softly nuzzles it into my hand. I grip it tightly, it has already been de-thorned.

Carefully, with my free hand, I reach it out just a few inches in front of me and James places his Stag head onto my palm. I pet him softly, he stares up at me and it was as if I was staring at James himself.

“You clever bastard!” I exclaim, I knew how hard becoming Animigus is, but why would he do such a thing? I was broken out of my trance when the Stag (James) begins to walk, slowly at first, he looks back at me and inclines his head first and it was as if I could just hear him saying, in his cheeky manner ‘Ladies first, of course,”

I swallow thickly and fight another bout of paralyzing shock, and instead smile, following James through the forest. His hoofs sinking softly into the ground, the sound was methodic and helped with the strange over pour of emotions I’m feeling.

What happened next, is actually quite embarrassing. It started with a little scamper by my feet. Considering how far we’ve walked into the forest I was more than a bit concerned for my safety, but the large, strong Stag beside me cast most of my fears to the side. Then, through a break of moonlight through the trees I saw it. A large, fat rat!

I screamed so loud, dark ravens flew from their slumbers in the trees. James beside me stomped his feet, and checked the perimeter with analyzing eyes, searching for the danger. But they only found the rat. I never thought a Stag could give such an amused, disappointed expression, yet here I stand. Clinging to a deers ass for dear life, and he is looking back at me with said expression. My cheeks flush and I let go of his furry back, then the Rat very slowly inches towards me.

It’s sharp nose lifting and dancing from side to side, it’s soft brown eyes sparkling up at me. I’d say it even looked a little cute, friendly even. But what unusual behavior, and what unusual eyes. It’s tail glowing under the white light like a plump, pink worm...

“Wormtail!” I realize, laughter bubbling from my chest. The Rat lets out a gleeful squeak and James besides me snorts once again, seeming to laugh. The Rat scurried off into the shadows, and I can’t help but berate myself. Did I hurt his feelings?

But then he comes bounding back into sight, he stands on his back legs and his little Rat face seemed to glow with excitement as his pink hands unveiled a small little white wildflower. The same kind Remus would pick for me on walks we took together. My smile only grows bigger as I do a sweet curtsey and pick up the flower mid-bow, lifting it up to my nose as I stand straight again.

“My apologies, you know I don’t like rats. But I suppose I’ll have to make an exception for you.” I smile down at him, and he reveals two yellow buck teeth, smiling up at me with as much of a smile any rat can muster. I fail to hold in my laughter but extend my arm to him, he climbs up it and perches himself on my shoulder. I hold the two flowers in one hand, and rest my other on James soft shoulder, so I can be led through the dark forest, I knew by know, they were leading me to Remus.

Peter climbs down my other arm and onto James back, then up his head. I laugh as Peter holds on for deer(hehe I’m funny) life as James jokingly waves his head back and forth, Peter almost falls off but I help him back. We all seem to laugh in our own ways, when suddenly a loud bark cuts through the sound of laughter and owls and even the rustling of the woods around us. It was loud and impatient and yet humorous, it reminded me of someone I know well. I smirk, raising a brow I turn to the equally amused Stag and Rat, James and Peter.

“Wormtail. Prongs,” I say, motioning to the Stag who only inclines his head again, “And Padfoot. Let me guess... Sirius is also some animal wandering these woods, finding us by chance? A wolf, perhaps? A dog?” They don’t say a thing, they only begin to walk again. Turning us towards the sound of the echoing bark.

I was on the ground before I knew what was happening. We’ve walked just a few more minutes and then a cloud of black overcame my sense and tackled me to the floor. Black, Sirius Black, was a dog and on top of me. He was barking right by my ear and cuddling me, it wasn’t until two little Rat hands attempted to push his leg that he got off.

I was laughing uncontrollably, this was all too much. Too crazy. I knew they were geniuses, but this... becoming Animagus and though the reason was unclear I could feel it, something to do with Remus. With Moony. The nickname had a new meaning to me, and I wasn’t sure what yet, but I was sure I was about to find out.

Sirius was racing around me in circles as I stood up. His black tail wagging wildly, and his fur rustled and tossed under the wind. I wanted to coo and awe, though his eyes were human and mischievous, the rest of him was adorable and strong. A proud, handsome looking dog. It was clear, by his behavior, that he was just as excited to reveal this big secret, as I was to know the truth.

“Sirius! You dog,” I joke, a bad one on my part but he still barked with laughter and I shook my head, taking in the three of them. This was, Merlin, I didn’t even know what this was other than beyond surprising and impressive. Shocking.

Suddenly, Sirius makes one last dart behind me, he sends me in a spin and by the time I can control my footing he is back in front of me. He is sitting on his back legs, front paws up in the air and bent in a cute trick, his ears flopped forward. Just above his paws, drooping from the jaws of his mouth is a single daffodil. Daffodils, like the one written about in this favorite poem of mine that Remus would read me on bad days, I Wandered Lonely as A Cloud by William Wordsworth.

I sigh, tilting my head to the left, a soft smile on my lips. Everything about this was amazing and sweet. It was amazing that the boys had this whole other life I never knew about, which I’m sure there will be a reasonable explanation for my ignorance because ouch. But sweet, because this was obviously planned my Remus, but the boys were taking their own time to make it happen. I bend down and pat Sirius’s head, the only time he lets me touch his hair, I think, almost laughing. His tail wags as I pluck the flower from his mouth and he lets it fall easily into my hand.

I gather it with my other flowers, now forming a little bouquet and bring the whole lot of them up to my face and inhale. I close my eyes as I smell the sweet and powerful aromas, memories with Remus filled my head, and with it, a warmth filled my chest.

“I hope this hasn’t been all too much for you. I thought some truths would be better seen than told,” Remus says, walking up behind me. I spin around, I didn’t even notice the sound of crunching leaves behind me. But I couldn’t find it in me to speak, the moonlight dancing across Remus’s face, highlighting his eyes, and the soft curves of his lips with the ragged lines of his scars, I was astounded by the boy before me. Once again entranced. All the anxiety, all the fear has left me, as I stared at him clad in fancy pants and a button up to match.

He stops walking, unsure of where he stands with me. I step towards him, finding some clearing in the haze I begin to speak.

“It’s wonderful. They’re wonderful,” I say, turning with a thankful smile to the stag, the rat and the dog. They each in turn, show their teeth at me in an attempt of a smile. I laugh and beside me, Remus does too. With a nod of his head, they turn their backs on us and leave. I no longer needed guidance or safety. Remus stood before me and I felt something that has been missing for the past couple of days. And even though I was in the middle of the dangerous, forbidden forest, I knew that I was also home.

“I love the flowers. I must say, this night has already taken the most unexpected turn it could, but the nicknames definitely make more sense,” I attempt a bad joke, a habit of mine in a nerve wracking situation but Remus only seems to grimace slightly, before turning it into a smile, though it was a rather sad one.

“Well, you seem to be taking this well. Have you figured out mine yet?” He asked, his sad tone surprising me. We were so close his voice dropped low just out of habit it seemed, and because the short distance between us put us in a trance. I missed him. I missed him so much my body now seemed to come back from the dead and reach for him, I was alive again with dancing butterflies and buzzing questions. I glanced down to his lips, before taking a step back.

“No. But I can guess. It makes sense, once every month you seem to leave me. You change into someone who is distant, someone who doesn't seem to love me,” He steps forwards, looking pained by this realization, but as I speak it becomes clearer to me, but I can’t yet reach the conclusion.

“I will never become a person who doesn’t love you. I will change and grow but you will be the one thing that remains. You don’t have to guess anymore, but I want you to know that my love for you will always remain, even if after tonight, we do not,” he speaks with such reverence, like our love was something scared to him and deep down, I knew I felt the same way. It is my first love, and if I can help it, than he will be my only lover until the day I die. All I can do is nod as he steps forwards again, I can see a bead of sweat roll down the apple of his cheek, he was about to tell me. I can feel the shaking of his hands as he places them in mine.

Suddenly, his unbreaking stare leaves me, and in place, find the bright moon. Twinkling in the sky and illuminating us in its wake. I understood in that moment, Moony. A boy mapped with scars. Moony. A boy plagued by nightmares, and insecurities. Moony. A tough, but oh so scared boy who seemed to hate the very night itself. Moony. The boy who changes during the month, and is gone completely on the full moon. Moony. Moony, the Werewolf.

I pull on his hands and gather him into my embrace, pulling back only to kiss him sweetly. The world becomes ours as our lips dance with one another to a song we’ve heard before. It is the song of him making love to me. It is the song of the poems he reads me and the flowers he picks. It is the song of the moons very envy as she watches us together. The song of lovers. It moves us. It moves my hands up his neck and through his hair. It moves his lips across my cheek and jaw and then down my neck. It moves the wind, and the trees around us. It pulls the moans from our mouths and then the confessions.

“My beautiful love,” Remus kisses the words into my skin, up to my lips. “My only love,” he mumbles into my lips, kissing me softly but his hands are bruising at my hips. As if I would leave him if he did not hold me close enough and for forever.

“I love you, Remus ‘Moony’ Lupin. I love all of you and all that you ever will be and all that you have been.” He pulls back from me, his eyes glazed with tears and a softness that makes my heart sing. He nods, and than he laughs. A tear falls from his eyes as his head leans back and he laughs, the sweetest sound I’ve ever heard. It was as if all his anxiety, and self-hatred has left him and in their place my words have nestled in. I love him. I love him. I love him.

“I’m a werewolf ya know?” he says, still laughing, he knew I made the connection. At this point it was pre-caution, I roll my eyes and kiss him again. The world is forgotten as we kiss, as we rejoin as one and as lovers. I pull back and softly wipe away his tears.

“I know,” I whisper into his lips, he smiles, giving me a soft kiss. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner, Remus?” I ask, pulling away from him. He frowns now, his cheeks red with blush, and lips to match.

“I thought I’d lose you forever. That you’d think I was some monster, or- or beast. You always looked at me like I was the world, and I was terrified one day you’d see the real me, and just- well, stop loving me altogether.” While he speaks his eyes still glitter with the promise of tears, and my heart sinks at his words.

“I think I understand your anxiety about it. I can’t imagine how hard it must be. But I would never stop loving you for such a thing, merlin, I don’t think anything could stop me from loving you. I never want you to feel the need to hide from me again, okay?” Remus nods into my hands, I still haven't moved them since I wiped away his tears, it seemed like more keeps falling each time.

“The boys became Animigmus to help with my full moons. It can get pretty bad… but ever since they have come along things really got better, really they did.” he adds when seeing my sad facial expression. My heart felt broken all over again at just the thought of Remus being in pain, alone and suffering. I swore in that moment, I’d do anything in this world to help make things better for him. I nod my head. He continues.

“And Lucy, her older sister is a werewolf. She figured out that I was one pretty quickly, she said I could speak to her about it all, and that she could help somehow. It was nothing more, she just let me complain and even write some letter to her sister. I never even thought of Lucy like the way I think of you. She was always just a friend, but that remains no more. To hell with her,” he says. He can’t stop smiling, a real, golden smile. There was nothing holding him back, I could just tell he felt so much lighter. I took his hand and wordlessly led him to sit on the grass with me. We laid shoulder to shoulder, staring up at the stars together.

He told me in depth about how he was bitten as a child, about how it changed his life. Then when the boys told him they were becoming Animgus for him and all the little moments and adventures they’ve had since. He didn’t sugar coat a thing, he didn’t lie. He was bearing his soul before me for the first time, without any thin veil holding us back and I’ve never felt closer to him. It was well past curfew by the time I felt satisfied with everything he’s told me, I felt both heavy with this knowledge and yet free. I felt included and like I truly knew Remus, and I still did love him. More than ever, I love him.

We laid in silence for some time, my head has moved to lay on his chest and I can hear the steady, warm beating of his heart.

“Can you hear it?” he asks, out of the blue. I strain my ears to listen to the forest around us, I lift my head slightly and he laughs. “No. My heart, can you hear it?” I lean back into him and let out a little laugh myself.

“Oh. Yes,” I smile, “I can hear it.”

“Good. It beats for you.”mhe says, I look up at him only to find that he has already been looking at me. His eyes soft, and smile warm, his heart steady under the palm of my hand and loud within the stillness of the night. It beats for you. His words echoed in my head and I couldn’t help myself, I lean forward and press my lips against him. I could kiss him forever. I could be with him here like this forever, alone and in love, honest and unafraid.

I understood a lot of things that night, more than just about who Remus was and the secrets he has been hiding. More than the truths that he bared and the love that we had. I understood how after all this time of separation and uncertainty. After exhausting ourselves in a sea of sorrow and questions, we have finally found our peace. I have found my happiness. And I realized something rather important. Rapture is a boy. Rapture is love.

Taglist:

@crazylokonugget @beyondprincess @1975weasley @nicodoesntexist @goto-hi-this-is-my-brain @yoyoitsbella @ftwert @sognatrice-as-a-hobby @dontjudgemyobsessionpls @blackpinkdolan

@holdenviolet @katie-lupin05 @acoustic-archie @trishizzl @accio-willtolive-lmao @ilistentotayswifttocope @kopheliablack

#young remus imagine #remus lupin #young remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #remus x reader #harry potter #harry potter fandom #the marauders #the marauders fanfiction #fluff #werewolves #pls im emotional this series is over #young marauders #i love yall

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genderfluid-insomniac · 3 years

Text

"It would've been my fault!" ~ Muriel x reader

words: 1.5k

TW: anxiety attack, anxiety

Muriel had left an hour or two ago and you wish he had come back already, it didn’t help that the sun had set long ago and you worried about your lover in the forest at night. Your breath labored and shuttered, the world around you was getting fuzzy.

It all started off as a good day, you and Muriel woke up, feeding the chickens and bathing in the river. You fed Inanna and went to the shop for work, giving him a kiss before heading off. Vesuvia was crowded and bustling as always, weaving your way through the people and stands.

You loved walking through the market on the way to Asra’s shop because even though it gave you social anxiety, the delicious smells and bright colors were so worth it. The back roads were a good place to go to if you got too overwhelmed and you could still enjoy the scents and sights that the nation gave its citizens.

Finally, you arrived at the shop and used your key to get in but already found the door unlocked, hearing the chime as you stepped in, “Hello, how can I help-” Asra turned around and smiled, seeing you, “ Y/N! It’s nice to see you. It should be a short day today, so feel free to take it easy.”

Nodding, you gave Faust a pat on the head and went to get behind the counter, organizing the herbs and potions that were to be picked up today. As the day went on, it was slow with regulars coming in for their orders and new customers coming in for a reading or a certain herb.

Faust switched shoulders between readings and ended up napping on yours, you eventually woke her up to place her on a pillow because you were getting ready to close. You said goodbye to Asra and headed out, taking the main road to be safe and gazing at the other shop owners closing or getting ready to wrap up their stands.

You admired how beautiful the sunset was and how the moon was just peaking over the horizon through the trees and the birds cooed every couple of steps you took. The last warm golden rays of the sun casting a glow on you and the moon beginning to light the rest of your path home, tall blades of grass tickling your ankles.

“Muriel?” You called as you opened the door and walked in, taking off the outer layer you were wearing and saw a note placed on the table.

‘Hi Y/N, If you’re reading this then I’m out checking on the heart of the forest since I sensed something wrong. Inanna is with you and should warn you if anything is near but I know you can handle your own’

The she wolf got up from near the fire and pawed at you, rubbing against your leg and weaving between them. You gave her a pat and dropped some food that you had picked up for dinner, sitting down next to the fire and having Inanna rest her head on your lap.

As you looked out the window, the fire lit up most of the room as the moon had risen high already and some dark thoughts had started to enter your mind. You tried to push them away but memories of the past events didn’t help but power the accusations.

‘What if Muriel gets hurt? You’re just sitting here and he could be hurt right now.’

No. No. Muriel can handle himself. You and him trained under Morga and held your own against the devil and Lucio, before and after he was without a body. If he was in trouble he would return, he was smart and strong. You can help if Inanna senses trouble.

‘He could be dead out there! And you’re taking it easy, it would be your fault!’

Stop! Nothing is your fault! You were working with Asra and if anything happened then you couldn’t have known. But the thoughts still didn’t back down, they only got stronger.

‘Maybe he’s abandoning you… after all did you really save him from his past.’

There it was. The insecurity that held onto you throughout your journey with Muriel and no matter what anyone said it couldn’t stop that one thought from pushing to the front of your head. You knew that there wasn’t anything you could have done to help the hermit during his time in the Colosseum, you had lost your memory and had the plague.

That whole moment in the past was the catalyst for so many problems that you blame yourself for and knowing you probably could have helped more than you did back then. The room started spinning as your breath picked up and you started hyperventilating. You knew what was happening but you couldn't control it.

Grasping your hair tightly as you clenched your eyes shut and tears pricked them. Your chest rises and falls rapidly, not being able to hear anything but the thoughts screaming at you and your breathing in the background. Inanna lifted her head up noticing that something was wrong and poked her nose at your head, now between your knees in your crouched position.

You didn’t feel her until she did the fourth time and looked up at her with tears streaming down her face and her lips trembling. Not being able to see right but blinking through your blurry vision to make out the wolf sitting in front you with a paw on your knee and pressing her head against yours.

Your lips felt locked and quivering badly so you couldn't even make out words but small noises of distress. She saw your eyes pleading for help and ran out of the hut in search of Muriel and knew you needed someone else to make sure you were okay. Asra was too far away but finding the gentle giant might take longer not knowing where he was but deciding you probably needed him more.

Feeling the door swing open and wind rush in made you shiver, only shifting closer to the fire for warmth. Hoping. Praying that your lover would be here soon.

Minutes passed as you continued to be berated by your thoughts,

‘He doesn’t want you’

‘You’re only slowing him down, just give it up’

‘What makes you think he actually cares?’

You buried your head deeper between your knees in an attempt to make it stop and occasionally felt like you couldn’t breathe due to your rapid short breathes. Wind blowing around your fragile body and causing you to cry out a sob, cold tears hitting the floor and staining it a darker color.

The door opened with Inanna rushing in and Muriel not far behind, breathing heavily and eyes full of panic. Spotting your shaking figure and his body froze. At least you weren’t hurt but you certainly were not okay. He slowly crept towards you and put a hand on your knee, jumping when your head shot up.

“Hey- Hey- Y/N, it's okay. I’m here. I’m safe.”

The hermit whispered, careful to not scare you or make matters worse. There he was. He was safe. Your thoughts were wrong and he was here with you, making sure you were okay. You rushed into his arms and cried against his fur covered chest, feeling his arms wrap around you and rub circles on your back.

“I- I thought you were dead or something had hurt you. I was here doing nothing and it would have been my fault,” you stuttered and said in between sobs, “ You would have died Muriel and I don’t think I could live without you knowing that.”

The grip on your waist got tighter, grounding you and calming your breathing. He softly spoke and rested his head on yours,

“That would never happen. You know I can handle myself and I would never leave without you. I love you.” He was a man of few words but when he did speak you knew he only said the truth and meant what he said wholeheartedly.

He shifted so you two were resting on a blanket separating you both from the cold floor and cradling you in his big embrace. Inanna circled and curled up next to the lovers, her tail wagging tiredly and happy that you were okay. The warmth from the fire and herbs that you had brought lulling you to sleep, your nerves relaxing with the thought of safely being held by Muriel.

#muriel the arcana #muriel x reader

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hopelesshawks · 3 years

Text

Official Accounts Part 30 (Bakugo Route)- The Past

Summary: (y/n) was perfectly happy remaining anonymous, even if her best friends were all pro heroes and she worked under THE Hawks. Handling the technical aspects of hero work from the background suited her just fine, thank you very much. That goes out the window when suddenly her twitter blows up thanks Denki and the famed no. 2 hero is asking her to run his own official twitter as a result

If you don’t want to see Official Accounts content blacklist #hopelessoa

Masterlist

You knock on Katsuki’s door and it opens almost immediately. “Sorry about this,” you tell him by way of greeting. “I already told you idiot,” Katsuki replies in the soft voice he’s always reserved just for you, “you’re always welcome at mine.” He closes the door behind you and then pulls you into a hug. “Do you wanna talk about it?” he asks. You think for a long moment. Do you? How do you even go about explaining what just happened between you and Hawks without revealing secrets that aren’t yours to share? But you deserve to talk this out too. “I do I just need a second to organize my thoughts,” you finally say. “Ok how about you take a seat on the couch, I can heat up ramen for you, then when I come back you can tell me all about it,” he offers. “Homemade ramen?” you ask. “Obviously, dumbass,” Katsuki says with a roll of his eyes as he gently removes himself from your arms and then pushes you towards the couch. “Now go sit down,” he insists. You nod and give him a small thanks before heading to his living room.

By the time Bakugo returns with the promised ramen you’ve wrapped a blanket around your shoulders and made yourself comfortable on the couch. You open your arms wide in a silent request for Bakugo to join you. Although he rolls his eyes as if put upon, it secretly makes his heart melt a little that you find comfort in his touch. He sits down careful not to spill the bowl he holds in one hand before passing it to you. He then pulls you closer until you’re almost in his lap and re-situates the blanket around you both. He’s missed this. You’ve always been very cuddly with all of your friends, but for awhile after you two broke up it felt like he’d lost his privileges. Even after you opened back up to him it was never quite the same. Sure when you were upset you knew you could rely on him, but the casual intimacy you shared with Denki and the rest of your friend group had been lost to Bakugo. It was only fair. That casual platonic intimacy was a little too close to the romantic intimacy the two of you had shared when dating. You’d thought it best not to indulge lest you fall back into old habits.

He still remembers the break up like it was yesterday even though it was almost 5 years ago now. It was only a year after graduating from UA. The transition from high school to working life had been hard on your relationship. Bakugo had grown accustomed to seeing you every day during lunch and you’d frequently come to the class a dorm after classes. To go from that to barely seeing each other because of your differing work schedules was hard enough on its own but it also threw his jealousy into overdrive. Suddenly seeing you and Denki curled up on your couch for a movie was enough to have him raging even though he logically knew there was no intent behind it. He was more irritable than usual, his already short temper getting even shorter. It felt like the few times you did get to see each other there was always an argument. Eventually you’d called him after work one day and simply sighed “We need to talk after your shift is over.” It hadn’t even occurred to him that you’d want to break up and yet when he arrived at your place you promptly told him that you feared the relationship was already sinking. Continuing it, you had argued, could do nothing but drag your friendship down with it. He wanted to say you were wrong so badly but he knew you weren’t. So the two of you had ended things, slogged through a few months of it being awkward, and eventually returned to a sense of normalcy in your friendship.

All of that said, Bakugo has never quite gotten over you.

It comes and goes in waves. Most days it’s just an ignorable, dull ache, only painful if prodded. Other days though? Other days the regret is almost overwhelming. Those are the days he calls Deku. The first time he did it was a week after the break up. He probably never would have if not for the fact he was damn near blackout drunk and sad and so very alone in an apartment filled with things that reminded him of you. He had barely talked to Midoriya since graduation, so Deku was understandably confused when he got the call. “I miss her so much,” Bakugo had slurred miserably down the line. It didn’t take a genius to know who he meant and Midoriya had quickly put two and two together that you and him had broken up. “I’m sorry,” was all Midoriya had time to say before Bakugo hung up the phone. That was supposed to be the only time. In fact Bakugo stubbornly refused to call him in the days following that initial call, despite being tempted to several times. Eventually though he caved. He needed to talk to someone about all this. Keeping it pent up was eating away at him but he couldn’t exactly talk to his usual friends about it when all of them were just as close with you. So Deku was his only option. Not only that but Deku was a good option. It didn’t matter how angry or upset Bakugo was, Midoriya was always patient and sympathetic. Sometimes they’d be on the phone for over an hour. Sometimes the call would be as brief as that fateful first one had been. Regardless, it helped. Soon enough the frequency of the calls started to dwindle until they stopped altogether.

Then Hawks asked you to run his Twitter.

At first it was fine. For all Mina’s jabbering on you seemed insistent you didn’t see Hawks that way. But then everyone else was getting in on the action as well and it all just spiraled from there. The night you went on your date with Hawks was Bakugo’s first time calling Midoriya in nearly a year. He texted the group chat confirming that Hawks getting shifts covered for you was indeed a big deal and then immediately afterwards was scrolling for Deku’s contact. You hadn’t dated anyone since Bakugo and while he knew it would happen eventually the reality hurt way more than all the hypotheticals he’d come up with over the years ever did. By now Midoriya knew the drill so he didn’t say anything when he answered the phone, just waited to see where Bakugo would take the conversation. He was not expecting an invitation to grab drinks.

It was odd seeing each other for personal reasons again after so many years. Their only interactions outside of the phone calls had been through work, a stark contrast to the crowded bar they now found themselves in. They started with awkward small talk, as one does with old friends they’ve barely seen, but eventually they started to really talk and Bakugo realized that all of those times he’d talked to Midoriya on the phone not once had he stopped to hear about his life. So he tried to make up for it then, even if it was a little too late. It was kind of nice. Maybe in another life where Bakugo had been a different kid, one who would’ve taken Midoriya’s hand when he fell, one who was a little less cruel, they could’ve been best friends. “So what happened with (y/n) this time?” Midoriya finally asked and it’s a question Bakugo had both wanted and dreaded to answer. “She’s going on a date with Hawks tonight,” Bakugo sighed. “Good for her,” Midoriya had noted and immediately Bakugo’s grip tightened around his drink. “You know it is good for her right?” Midoriya asked. “I know it is. That’s why it hurts so bad,” Bakugo admitted. It occurs to Bakugo now that perhaps that is why he’s been pushing Hawks to do better by you.

He knows intimately the pain of loving you and then losing you.

He wouldn’t wish it on anyone else.

So he listens to you recount your fight with Hawks. He listens with full attention until you run out of steam. When he gives you advice he gives it as a friend, not as an ex or as the man still in love with you. He gives you advice the way he thinks Deku would. He gives you the kind of advice you’d offer him if the situation were reversed. And it hurts and hurts and hurts to know his advice might push you back into Hawks’ arms, but when you pull yourself closer to him, sigh “Thanks Katsuki,” and then promptly fall asleep on his chest, he knows it’s worth it.

Because he loves you.

God, how he loves you.

Author’s Note: I BROKE MY OWN HEART WITH THIS ONE SO NOW YALL CAN BE HEARTBROKEN WITH ME. Anyway I adore the headcanon that Bakugo is a really good cook and I wanted there to be a slight parallel to how (y/n) and Hawks would have tea together but upon googling ramen recipes I realized it would be incredibly unrealistic for Bakugo to make homemade ramen in the time it takes (y/n) to get from her place to Bakugo’s. So instead he reheats what’s leftover from cooking dinner for himself, which I also googled to confirm was possible (it is you just need to make sure you store all the components separately). ALSO writing in Midoriya was a lot of fun. As much love as I think Midoriya and Bakugo have for each other I could very easily see them as being distant after graduation but still knowing they could reach out to each other if need be.

Taglist [open]: @maltese-sparrow @someweirdshitman @oliviasslut @captaincyberqueen @ladyzayismultifandom @pixelwisp @cathy8taffy @itskindofafairything @larkspyrr

#hopelessoa #bakugo katsuki #bakugo x y/n #bakugo x reader

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bonjour-rainycity · 3 years

Text

Double Heart | Chapter Four ~ Cosima

|previous part|

Pairing: Haldir x OFC

Rating: PG

Word count: 4887

Warnings: None

**Read on Ao3 under the user “bonjour_rainycity” if you prefer!**

A/n Thanks for all your interactions with this story! In honor of all the writing I got done for the World Wide Write-a-thon, here’s a bonus chapter :)

Translations: Mellon = friend

Haldir wasn’t kidding. In order to make up for the time spent with Alex, he pushes us hard. That, combined with the unfamiliar gait of Rumil’s horse, leaves me sore and aching by the time we finally stop well after dark.

Rumil helps me to the ground, giving me an apologetic look. “Sorry.”

I wave off his concerns, starting my stretching routine. “S’alright. I’ll probably get used to the all-day riding the second we get to Imladris.”

At this, he cracks a smile. “If you want to wash in the river, better go now. I’ll take dinner to Alex.”

I shouldn’t leave Alex alone. But my body aches and is covered in dirt, and a part of me just isn’t ready to face him. I need to take a moment for myself, away from everyone else, to process and think about what all this means. So I skirt around the hill that marks camp and head to the riverbank.

I undress and wade into the river, stopping when the cool water comes to my shoulders. Baranor had supplied me with an extra bar of soap and I use that to cleanse my body and hair of the dirt that attached itself to me during the day. At the top of the hill that overlooks the river, I catch sight of Alex, sitting isolated near the pile of bags that indicate our spot of camp. I purse my lips.

What does his presence mean?

I had been quite convinced that this world is in my head, that I’m concocting some elaborate, possibly lucid, dream and that I would wake up any minute. Or, perhaps, that I had hit my head like Baranor suggested and am now in some sort of coma. But now Alex is here. The memories I have of him clearly show that he’s important to me. I can recall a long line of birthday parties, study breaks, summer camping trips spent staring up at the sky. I remember him comforting me after a bad day, us getting into arguments and then making up, me cheering him on at some sort of competition. But when I try to look at the other faces there, to zero in on any one and pull up memories of them, all I get is a vague blur and a splitting headache. I give up the fruitless effort and turn my thoughts back to Alex.

Alex, who I know I know, is just as real to me as Haldir or Baranor. And each man here acts in a way that I wouldn’t expect — if I created them, wouldn’t they act as I would? I am not stoic like Haldir or silly like Rumil. I don’t posses Baranor’s healing knowledge or Orophin’s attention to detail. And just the sheer vastness of this world…there’s no way I could imagine it all. Even now, we follow a path of which I have no knowledge, so how could I have dreamed up that path?

The ache behind my eyes deepens.

This is too much.

This world feels real. The people feel real. My budding friendships with them feel real—just as real as my friendship with Alex.

I groan, flipping on my back to float.

And I lose the ability to breathe. Because these constellations aren’t the ones I remember. They dance in unfamiliar patterns across the inky black sky, distant and watchful as always, but completely unknown to me.

I love the stars. I love them in a way that causes my heart to ache, that sometimes makes me weep. Night after night I sought them out, charting them by telescopes and my naked eye. I know my constellations like I know the back of my hand—I studied and tracked them relentlessly.

I wouldn’t have replaced my stars.

I release a shaky breath.

A cold dread creeps through my bones, turning the water frigid. Everything suddenly seems more predatory, more dangerous, from the tall grass on the bank to the trees far in the distance….Even the men I travel with.

For one, wild moment, I entertain the idea that they are exactly who they say they are — elves from some unknown realm. Elves, not men. Elves who have pointed ears and wear intricate braids and walk with a grace I could never hope to imitate. Elves who can see far into the distance, hear every comment I make under my breath, ride for hours without tiring, and draw their weapons in less than a second, using reflexes that far outmatch mine.

Elves who inhabit a world that has a foreign set of stars.

The water that brushes against my neck feels suffocating. Gasping, I swim to shore, pulling myself onto the riverbank. It takes me multiple tries to redress, and I realize that my hands are shaking—I am shaking. I collapse into the grass, drawing in heaving breaths. This is too much, this is too much, this is too much!

“Cosima.”

My name comes from over the hill.

It’s Haldir’s voice.

In the beats of silence that follow, all I can hear is my wavering breath.

He calls my name again, closer this time.

I squeeze my eyes tightly shut, concentrating on the sound of his voice. Solid, assured, stable. Everything I do not feel. My breath begins to even out. My shaking subsides. The sound of grass crunching underfoot reaches my ears, and I stand just in time to meet Haldir’s approach.

He settles his weight on his back foot to balance on the slope of the hill, giving me a stern look. “We lost sight of you.”

I stiffen, pulling back from him. “Were you watching me bathe?”

His eyes blow wide. “N-no! Of course not, I-I would not presume to—” I’ve never seen him look so out of sorts. The tips of his—pointed—ears burn red and his eyes dart wildly around looking anywhere but at me.

The sight is so at odds with what I know about him that I can’t help it.

I burst into laughter.

It’s a little hysterical, and maybe I’m crying a bit, but it feels so good to laugh. Haldir lets out a noise that sounds suspiciously like a sigh of relief, and chuckles hesitantly. It rumbles deep in his chest, sounding almost warm. I wipe the tears from my eyes, shaking my head slowly. As the laughter subsides, I study him, taking in everything that marks him as clearly not human.

He feels real.

I pull my gaze from his braids and instead settle on his ice blue eyes. They stare evenly into mine, perhaps studying me too. A wind blows over the river, reminding me just how much I long for my mat and blanket. The fatigue once again makes itself known—much worse after my panic on the riverbank. I shift on my feet, gesturing up the hill. “I think I’m overly tired.”

Haldir inclines his head in acknowledgment, clasping his hands professionally behind his back. “Understandable, given the day you’ve had. I will escort you back.”

I trudge up the hill, concentrating extra hard to not slip in the mud and ruin the bath I just had, Haldir not far behind. We reach the top of the hill and make our way to where the bags are laid out as well as dinner rations distributed.

Alex sits by himself.

He raises his head, his smile of greeting turning to a scowl the moment Haldir crests the hill behind me. He looks past me, addressing Haldir only. “What were you doing with her down there?”

I feel Haldir bristle and once again hurry to de-escalate. “It’s fine, Alex. He only came to get me because I was gone for a while.”

He shrugs, the action seeming jerky and unnatural. “I could have gone to get you.”

I turn and give Haldir a look of apology. I honestly don’t know why Alex doesn’t like him, they haven’t even had a proper conversation. Haldir watches Alex intently, his own mouth set into a hard line. Then, saying nothing, he stalks forward, leaving us alone.

I groan, bringing a hand to my forehead. “They’re not going to hurt me. They’re not going to hurt you, either.”

Alex shakes his head resolutely. “I don’t trust them.”

“You haven’t given them a chance!”

My words—louder than they’d needed to be—ring through the countryside, destroying the peaceful silence.

I sigh, berating myself for once again treating him too harshly. He’s owed the time he needs to adjust. Tentatively, I take a seat across from him. “I’m sorry. I know it’s a lot to take in. It took me a little while to get comfortable with them, too, you’ll—”

“No, Cosima,” he groans, cutting me off. “There is no ‘getting used to them’, there’s no ‘learning to trust them’. They’re delusional. They’re dangerous. We can’t let our guard down and get caught up in that. We have to focus on finding a way home.”

I rest my chin on my hands, feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. Something in his sentence reminds me of the conversation I had with myself in the river. Maybe he’s been thinking along similar lines. “Alex, if you’re talking about getting home, then you believe this place is real.”

He squints, raising an eyebrow. “Of course it’s real. There’s no way we’re both making it up. We’re probably in the plains of Africa or-or maybe somewhere in Europe, I don’t really know. The point is, these guys are lying to us. They’re trying to keep us confused and isolated. We need to stay sharp and look for an opportunity to escape.”

“Escape,” I breathe, definitely not wanting the others to hear our conversation. “Have you seen the land we’re traveling? With no supplies, no horses, no maps—we wouldn’t last two days.” Never mind the fact that just a few days ago, I was considering escape, myself.

“We’ll steal supplies then.” He shrugs, passion alighting his eyes. “It doesn’t matter—we’ll figure it out. In the meantime, learn as much about these guys and the landscape as you can and stop letting them try to convince you that they’re a fictional species. I’ll work on taking supplies. Then, when we have enough, we’ll leave.”

I shake my head slowly. Something about leaving, about separating myself from the group and striking out on our own feels wrong. Every survival instinct I have screams at me to stay put, to not abandon the safety net I found by chance. And a voice in the back of my head reminds me that if I’m seeing different stars…if I am under a different sky…well, then maybe there is no going home. I try to reason with him. “They haven’t tried to hurt us yet. They’ve given us their food, their water, allowed us to ride their horses. They’re helping us!”

He rolls his eyes, clearly about to interrupt.

“Just—go along with it until we reach Imladris,” I beg, holding up my hands to silence him. “Then at least we’ll have seen more of the landscape and will know what we’re dealing with. Maybe there will be supplies in the city that we can take, or even someone with knowledge of how to get back to America.”

He grits his teeth. “You need to stop playing into their lies.”

The two of us stare at each other, equally unwilling to back down.

Rumil appears at the top of the hill, smiling broadly. Either he’s oblivious to our argument or trying to diffuse it. He sets a bedroll at my feet. “For you.”

I look between the mat and Rumil, feeling quite guilty. There are only four bedrolls between the six of us now, and I’ve slept soundly on one for every night of my journey. I don’t deserve that…especially now that I’m thinking of robbing and abandoning them. My stomach churns. “Thanks, but I’m fine on the grass. I don’t want to keep taking your stuff.” I wince. Did that sound too suspicious? Could he know my thoughts?

Rumil only winks and plops onto the ground next to me. “Nonsense. It’s Orophin’s anyway.”

I sputter, the laughter escaping me without any real thought. It just feels so natural to be comfortable with Rumil, the others too. So what if they think they’re elves?

So what if they are elves?

Alex’s foot digs into mine, and my laughter dies. His words return to haunt me. They’re delusional…stop playing into their lies….

Haldir joins us. He sits across from Rumil, completing the small circle, saying nothing. He takes out a knife and what looks like a small rock and begins to sharpen the blade.

It’s clear Rumil doesn’t care for silence and he quickly tries to strike up a conversation. “Obviously you know each other now, but Cosima, you couldn’t remember Alex before today. Has anything changed? Do you remember something more?”

I feel each of their eyes on me and I search through the vague remnants of my memory. “I…didn’t know I knew Alex, true. But the minute I saw him, the memories came rushing back—not everything, of course, but I got more context into who he is and who we are to each other. But no, nothing more than that.”

Rumil raises an eyebrow, intrigued. “And who is he?”

“Her friend since childhood,” Alex cuts in smoothly, responding before I can.

Images of two children running down a paved road, cutting up paper and gluing it to popsicle sticks, trying to hit each other with foam swords, race through my mind.

“We…lived down the street from each other,” I recall, smiling as the memories take firmer hold. “I used to go to your house after school and your sister would watch us until our parents got home.”

“We went to prom together.” He gives a short laugh, fondness softening his guarded eyes. “Only because we couldn’t find anyone to go with either of us.”

“It was better that way,” I declare, the start of a smile twitching at my lips. “Who else would have ditched halfway through with me to get snacks and watch a movie?”

He shakes his head slowly, fondness giving way to nostalgia. “I had fun that night.”

“Me too.”

Look at all these memories you have together. See how long you’ve trusted him? How long he’s stuck by your side? Maybe you owe it to him to trust him now.

“That was good.” I whip around, startled to see Baranor leaning against a tall tree, clutching his healer’s bag. I had assumed he was on watch with Orophin. He makes his way over to us. “Perhaps the more you talk about it, the more you will remember.”

I shrug, heart rate slowing down after the scare. “Hopefully. Right now, it seems like my mind’s gone completely blank. I only have the memories I described. Anything beyond is just that—out of reach.”

“Be kind to yourself. Any progress is admirable.” He smiles, walking to the middle of our circle and crouching in front of Alex. “I’d like to take a look at your head and address any injuries you acquired in your time traveling alone.”

Alex hesitates, then rolls up the end of his right legging to reveal a dirty red and brown gash.

“Alex,” I gasp, recoiling from the wound. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

He shrugs, wincing slightly when Baranor prods at the edge of the cut. “There were more important things to deal with.”

I roll my eyes as a new set of memories—annoying me more than giving me hope—come to mind. “You always tried to be tougher than everyone else.”

He grins, then grimaces slightly when Baranor starts the cleaning process. Despite that, he retains a playfulness in his tone that’s welcome after our arguments. “True. Way tougher than you! That time you fell out of the tree—gosh, we could hear you shouting for miles.”

That memory flashes forward, too. “I was seven and it hurt!” I defend, crossing my arms indignantly.

Alex quirks a teasing eyebrow. “And did you ever climb a tree again?”

I sniff, turning my head to the sky to avoid seeing the blood weeping from the wound. “I can’t remember.”

“Well, you didn’t,” he snarks.

“Must be why you’re afraid of heights,” Rumil muses, reclining on the grass to watch the stars. Stars that I’m not making up. “You’re going to hate Caras Galadon.”

I turn my head in his direction. “Why?”

Mischief shines brightly in Rumil’s eyes. “The city is built into the trees.”

I gulp, wondering how on Earth I’m going to visit a city that’s built so high up, but then Alex catches my eye, and I understand.

We will not be going to Lothlórien.

{***}

The morning greets us with a cloudy sunrise and a harsh breeze.

Haldir eyes the sky warily. “Secure your supplies as best as you can We are in for a storm today.”

I grimace. It’s not that thunderstorms scare me, but from what I’ve learned about Haldir in our few short days together, I have a feeling he’ll require that we keep riding, no matter the weather conditions. Today probably isn’t going to be fun. A particularly gusty wind blows my cloak from my shoulders and I huff, yanking it back into place.

“Here.” I look up to see Haldir offering me a green and silver clip in the shape of a leaf. I eye it in confusion. “It will keep your cloak secured,” he explains, pointing to his own that clasps at the base of his neck.

“Oh,” I take it from him, slightly stunned at the kind gesture. “Thank you.”

He nods once then pivots on his heel and marches back to his horse a few yards ahead. I turn the clip in my hands, admiring its craftsmanship.

“That will come in handy today,” Rumil notes, bringing his horse up the hill to meet me.

I smile in greeting, securing the edges of my cloak with the clip. “Hey, I was thinking. Would you show me how to tack up the horse? That way I can help with that while you do some of your other tasks.”

He nods, agreeing to my proposal, and launches into a surprisingly in-depth description of how to properly care for and prepare a horse for a day of hard riding. I take in as much as I can but, knowing me, I’ll need some repetition and practice before it truly sticks. When Haldir gives the order to leave, Rumil gives me a leg up. But, much to my confusion, he settles himself behind me on the horse, rather than in front.

“What—“

He reaches around me to take the reins and place them in my hands, which have already clenched into fists. “You are not the only one who has good ideas. Today, I teach you how to ride. Do try your best and please don’t steer us into the river.”

I groan at the truth behind his joke but take the reins in my hands, knowing that its a good idea for me to learn. Riding skill will help when Alex and I are on our own.

Haldir doesn’t turn from his watch of the horizon, but he raises his voice loud enough for us to hear. “Do not slow us down, Cosima.” And, though his voice holds the same seriousness it always does, I swear I can hear the smallest hint of amusement.

{***}

By late morning, it starts to rain. The droplets are cold and big, taking away any warmth spring has to offer. Not long after, it begins to pour and the path turns to mud. Rumil switches places with me then, wanting a more experienced rider directing the horse through the worsening conditions. The rain soaks through my cloak, my tunic, my leggings. I shiver. Looking over, I see that Alex is equally uncomfortable and sits rigidly on the back of Baranor’s horse, using one arm to grip his cloak tighter around him. The others seem inconvenienced, but otherwise unaffected. They do not shiver, nor obsessively wipe the rain from their eyes. They certainly don’t react to cold rain like humans.

About an hour later, the storm really starts, the rain having apparently only been an introduction. Flashes and booms fill the air, loud enough for me to feel the vibrations in my chest. The wind howls and blows fiercely, causing the horses to bend against it to keep their pace. Water falls from the sky in sheets, completely obscuring my line of vision and soaking us all to the bone. With a note of panic, I realize that the river is steadily creeping up the bank, mingling with the mud that has become our path.

I shout over the rain. “Rumil!” Tugging on his arm, I point to the rising water, and he uses his knees to spur the horse forward. We pull up beside Haldir, who greets us with a questioning gaze.

“The path is in danger of flooding,” Rumil informs him, gesturing his head to the water mere inches from the horses’ hooves. A crease appears in Haldir’s brow and he glances around, working to form a plan.

To my surprise, he addresses me rather than Rumil. “Can you and Alexander continue in this weather? Is your health in danger if we do not seek shelter?”

Oh, I want to stop so badly. I want to find shelter, to let my clothes dry, to have a break from being pelted by icy droplets of rain. I want a snack and a blanket and perhaps a warm fire, if that’s not too much to ask.

But Haldir is appealing to my honesty, trusting me to give him an accurate answer. He is showing me the same respect he gives to his brothers, to Baranor, and I cannot take advantage of that trust. So, with a sigh, I shake my head. “No, we’ll be fine. We can keep going.”

Haldir nods once, a tendency of his, and raises his voice to be heard by all over the rain. “Leave the path and go uphill. We ride over the plains.”

I shudder. The planes are exposed. We will lose what little cover from the rain that the trees provide. But I push aside my dread and steel myself for the rest of journey. I can do this.

Hopefully, the rain will stop by nightfall.

{***}

Mercifully, it does. An hour before we stop for the night, the rain dies down, taking the wind and lighting with it.

Rumil has to practically peel me off the horse. He looks me over, eyes widening in alarm, and wraps me in his arms. “Mellon, you are shaking.” I lean into his warmth, though his clothes are as soaked as mine are.

Haldir dismounts and stomps over, giving me a withering glare. He speaks sharply, a bite to his words. “You said you would be fine.”

“And I meant it,” I snap back, annoyed from discomfort and the venom in his voice. “I just need to dry off and warm up, is all.”

He holds his glare steady, probably assessing the honesty in my statement. Or just trying to intimidate me. Finally, he nods, still angry, but resigned. “Baranor is starting a fire. You and Alexander shed your cloaks and sleep as close to it as you can.”

“Don’t you need me too-”

He cuts me off. “We will take care of the preparations for the night. You rest.”

When I make a noise of agreement to his plan, Haldir walks away, taking Rumil’s horse with him. With a final, worried smile, Rumil pushes me in the direction of the small fire, walking the opposite way to follow his brother.

I practically collapse on my bedroll next to the fire.

Across the flames, Alex sets me with an indecipherable look. “That was a long day.”

I huff in agreement, unable to do much more now that my body realizes how drained it is.

A pause. Then, “Do you think we’ll reach Imladris soon?”

I squeeze my eyes shut, wanting desperately to sink into sleep. Instead, I force myself to do some mental math. “Based on the timeline Orophin gave me, we’re probably about eight days away. Though, I don’t know how much the storm set us back. Why?”

He flops on his mat, pulling a probably damp blanket up to his chin. “Just trying to figure out how much more of this awful traveling we have ahead of us.”

I want to roll my eyes, but, before I can, sleep takes me.

{***}

When I open my eyes, it’s still dark out.

The fire has mostly died, though it retains a soft orange glow that gives me enough light to see the faces of my soundly sleeping companions. Alex has not moved from his spot across the fire, but to my right and left are Rumil and Baranor, the four of us forming a circle around the weakening flames. Haldir and Orophin must be standing watch.

I sit up slowly, trying to avoid making noise that could wake my friends. I press my hand against my cloak that is laid next to the fire—still a bit damp. It will need until morning. Twisting slightly to stretch my aching body, I notice the small bundle next to my mat, and curiously pull back the cloth. Inside the makeshift pouch sits a serving of lembas bread and a handful of red berries. I smile, pulling the dinner into my lap.

While I eat, I let my eyes scan the rolling hills of the plains. I’ve noticed that Haldir relaxes camp when we’re surrounded by trees, but in the plains, he sets a double watch. Looking at the landscape, I suppose I understand. The dips and peaks provide good cover—not just for us, but for anyone wishing to do us harm. There are plenty of hills around us of equal height, meaning the advantage of having the high ground is pretty much nonexistant. And, tonight especially, the landscape is encapsulated in a thick fog, obscuring much from my eyesight. But elves have much better vision, I reassure myself. Haldir and Orophin will be able to see just fine.

I hold my breath.

They are not elves. They are men, just like any other.

It seems I have to remind myself of that more lately. It seems too easy, given the differences between us, to accept their story. But as Alex says, they have to be playing some sort of trick on us. But why? Out of malevolence?

Immediately, I recoil from that thought. My companions seem much too kind, much too genuine to be liars. Even Haldir, who defaults to being standoffish and cold, has never made me feel like I’m in danger. In fact, he actively keeps us all from it. Even now, I’m sure he’d much rather be asleep, warming by the fire, but he and his brother brave the elements, keeping themselves awake and uncomfortable to ensure our safety.

How can people like that be liars?

How can they be bad?

Boots squelch against the mud and I look over my shoulder. Haldir walks up the hill, coming back from watch. Upon noticing me staring at him, he raises an eyebrow and comes to crouch between my mat and what’s left of the fire. He holds up his hands, warming them. “Can’t sleep?”

I shrug, fiddling with the edge of the cloth that holds my dinner. “Don’t know why, I’m tired enough. How was watch?”

He smiles softly as he glances around, still seeming to subconsciously take note of his surroundings. “Foggy, but quiet. We probably don’t need two, but I feel better that way, given all the hills.”

I offer him the remainder of my bread and berries, which he accepts with a nod of thanks. “Are we in danger?”

He pauses, chewing a berry. He doesn’t look at me and seems to take the time to choose his words very carefully. “The risks are lessened here.”

“Which means the worst is ahead of us,” I guess.

His eyes leave the horizon and turn to bore into mine. “The four of us are well-skilled in battle and have made this journey a hundred times before.”

I raise an eyebrow. “You didn’t answer my question.”

He only raises his own eyebrow to match mine, popping another berry into his mouth. He stands, brushes his hands off and returns the bundle to me. “I must wake Rumil and Baranor so Orophin can come back. You should try to sleep.”

I nod, my full belly and the warmth from the fire lulling me back into tiredness. I lay down on the mat and tuck my head into the crook of my arm just in time to see Haldir rouse his youngest brother and take his spot on the mat. Rumil gives me a sleepy smile before waking Baranor and the two head off together, presumably to relieve Orophin and take over watch.

Haldir settles on his mat and notices my gaze over the hill. “Goodnight,” he says pointedly, then rolls onto his back.

“Goodnight,” I mumble, falling back into sleep.

A/n Thanks for reading! Likes, comments, and reblogs make my day :) Let me know if you would like a tag! And if you’re having trouble being tagged, try subscribing on Ao3! That will notify you automatically when I post there.

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yandere-daze · 4 years

Note

25. "Why won't you talk to me anymore?" For manipulative Yandere Bruno. Peace! Take care of yourself!

Of course! This is my first time writing yandere bruno so I hope I got it right^^ This is what I´ve been working on the last few days and it really got kind of long.

Enjoy!!

25. "Why won't you talk to me anymore?"

Cut for length!

Yandere! Bruno with prompt 25

It was a tranquil and warm evening in Naples, the sun slowly setting and the bustle of the city quieting down for the day. You were sitting in the living room, listening to the radio while waiting for your husband. Your husband´s name was Bruno Bucciarati and he was a very gentle and comforting person that cared about you a whole lot. You two have been living together for a few months now, you realize as you gaze down at the pretty golden ring on your finger. A testament to your love and happiness. Your husband was currently in the kitchen and cooking dinner for the both of you. You asked to help him with the preparations, not wanting him to have to do all the work, but he quickly declined and insisted for you to rest and relax a bit. Of course, you didn´t really mind, you could use the break, after all your head has been hurting the whole day already. The pounding, aching feeling in your head has been plaguing you more than a few times recently and you were never really able to ignore the pain, so you often took painkillers to alleviate the problem. You had been feeling like this for a long time now, ever since that one fateful day.

It was a few months ago, when you woke up to a world of white consuming you. You felt dazzled and confused as you looked around, your surroundings barely registering in your mind. Looking down, you noticed you were laying on a bed. Noticing an itching feeling on your arms, you examined your own body to find that you were wearing some kind of white gown and to your horror, the entirety of your arms where bandaged up, as well as your legs. Where you in a hospital? It looked like that was the case, but what happened to you? Why were you bandaged up like this? And who was the man sitting at the side of your bed?

This man had short black hair, neatly cut into a bob as well as very striking blue eyes. He was wearing an elegant white suit with some black dots here and there. What you found a bit strange were the extraordinary number of zippers on his suit that seemingly served no purpose at all. But you weren´t really one to judge, the suit did look good on him, you couldn´t deny that. More important than this man´s appearance though was the reason he was here next to you. You have never seen this strange man in your entire life, so what was he doing here?

Seemingly hearing you shift around in your bed, the man raised his head and smiled a charming smile at you. He looked relieved; you noticed the tension on his shoulders slowly vanishing at the fact that you were awake.

“Ah y/n, I´m so happy you woke up! I was so worried about you, you´ve been in a coma for the last 5 days! I was so scared that you might not wake up again.”, the stranger said as he gently grasped your hand in glee. His touch so soft, it was as if he thought you were extremely fragile, as if a simple touch could break you. Whoever this was, he seemed very concerned about you but you just didn´t remember him at all. Who was this man?

“Uhm thank you very much for your concern but sir, I don´t mean to be rude but…. Who are you? Do we know each other?”, you just had to know.

The man in front of you almost looks a bit offended for a second before a look of confusion crosses his face, his eyebrows furrowing as he seemingly thought something over. There was a short pause before his face lit up again, a gentle smile on his face as he directed his attention on you again.

“Do you not remember me? My name is Bruno Bucciarati. Do you know how you got to this hospital?”

“No I´m afraid I don´t…Bruno. In fact I don´t remember anything at all. All I can recall is my name and my age. What happened to me? And how do we know each other?”. You were so confused. Try as you might, you couldn´t remember anything that lead up to this situation. It´s as if everything was suddenly gone.

“That´s a shame..”, the man now known to you as Bruno contemplated before continuing. “I don´t mean to overwhelm you, but I am in fact your husband. We´ve been married for quite some time now. Look, this is the symbol of our bond together.”, he said while smiling.

He raised his right hand to show you a beautiful gold ring on his ring finger. Looking down at your own hand, you find the very same ring decorating your own finger. So this was true then? You were happily married but couldn´t remember anything? You felt exhausted, all this new information was too much for you.

“Is this really true? Why can´t I remember anything at all? I´m so sorry Bruno, this must be very upsetting for you. Me not even being able to remember my own wedding.” You felt genuinely bad for him. You felt that he truly loved you, you could just tell from his gaze that was directed to you. He must have done so much for you, how could you just forget everything? All of your shared time together?

Bruno was seemingly able to understand your train of thought, because he immediately tried to cheer you up.

“Don´t be sad amore mio. You lost your memories in an accident; it was not your fault at all so don´t beat yourself up over it. I don´t ever want to see you sad, you hear me? It´s not the end of the world that you can´t remember, we can just make new memories together! I´m sure everything will be okay. We can even have a second wedding once you have adjusted if you want that.”

He then leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss against your palm as you felt a fluttering feeling inside of you. He truly must care about you so much! You couldn´t believe how lucky you were to have him.

Looking up, your husband spoke up once again.

“As far as I know, the doctor said you were free to go as soon as you wake up. Do you want to leave the hospital together now? I can show you our shared home if you would let me.”

couldn´t deny that you wanted to finally leave behind these suffocating white walls around you. You also were a bit excited to see your new- uhhhh old home.

You were kind of surprised to see how well decorated your shared home seemed to be. Everything looks amazing in your opinion! You obviously seemed to have a hand in decorating the place, it perfectly fit your tastes!

You two then came to a stop in front of a door, you almost bumping into Bruno. From what you could tell, this seemed to be the last room in the house, probably the bedroom.

Your husband looks back at you and gently urges you to open the door yourself, you should be the first one to enter the room. You carefully press down the door handle and open the door. What greets you blows your mind. You thought the other rooms looked amazing, but this was even better!

In the middle of the room was a huge double bed, tons of pillows piled on top, it had to be super comfortable! You were very tempted to just jump on top of it and go to sleep, the events of the day really tired you out. You heard a light chuckle from your right, looking over you saw that Bruno had entered the room as well and looked vaguely amused at your tired form.

“Feeling sleepy, cara/o? We can go to bed if you like, this day must have been very exhausting for you. But don´t worry, I´m sure you will feel right at home in no time!”

And with that, you two went to bed together, you falling asleep almost instantly despite the foreign situation.

After settling in, Bruno spends a lot of time talking about your relationship and how you two got together. You two met by pure coincidence at a coffee shop and had to sit down at the same table because there were no empty ones left. You then made pleasant conversation and one thing led to another, meeting each other more and more and eventually falling in love. Though Bruno absolutely insists that it was love at first sight for him. That he saw you and immediately felt a spark, he knew you were the one for him. He´s so glad to have you with him now! You´re just happy to know that you´ve managed to find a good match for yourself, someone that cares for you so much and would do anything for your happiness.

It´s been a few months now since you last saw the hospital, but your mental state hasn´t gotten any better. You still can´t remember anything from before you met Bruno in the patient room and it´s infuriating beyond belief. Sure you felt happy and comfortable with him, but you wanted to know so much more! But no matter how much you tried, your mind was as foggy as ever. Asking Bruno for insight on your past rarely did any good.

“Don´t strain yourself too much, darling. It´s okay if you don´t remember, we can always make new memories!”

Of course you want to make new memories with him but you also want to remember! It makes you a bit uncomfortable how ready your husband was to dismiss your past.

He was more than happy to talk about your relationship and how happy you both have always been but when you ask about your friends and your job? He immediately changes the topic as soon as it comes up.

“Are you not happy with me y/n? Am I not enough for you? I give you all the love I have to offer and that´s not enough? Those people weren´t good for you, you shouldn´t need to remember all of these painful memories!”

You really don´t know what to think anymore. Bruno is so nice and sweet to you, always looking out for you and making sure you´re comfortable but something doesn´t feel right.

Holding his hand doesn´t feel right.

Being in his arms doesn´t feel right.

Kissing him doesn´t feel right.

But whenever you do, you can´t help but see something flash in front of your eyes. A flickering image, gone before you can fully grasp it. But in your mind, you can see a different person, you´re sure of it. But all you can see is red.

Red eyes staring into yours.

Red red red red.

Dripping red.

Drips of red, forming a pool in front of your feet.

Someone laying on the ground.

Black and white clothes coated in crimson.

And then a flash of pure white.

A person in white, stained in red, walking towards you.

You feel a sudden surge of panic, an urge to run fills your entire being.

Panic.

Red traffic lights.

Red car.

Even more red.

Red red red.

Everything is red again.

And then piercing blue staring right at you.

You´re staring into Bruno´s eyes and the warm embrace that usually calmed you now set you on edge.

Back then, you felt like you were on the verge of remembering something very important. But you weren´t exactly sure what you were meant to remember, you still weren´t. You wondered why you recalled this situation now of all times. The radio blared on in the background as you waited for Bruno to finish dinner.

“We are here to report the death of a man. His body was discovered just days ago, though doctors believe him to have been dead for some months now, judging from the state the body is in. The police are currently looking for any relatives or friends who might be able to identify…”

You notice that your husband had entered the living room as the radio went silent. You turn your head to see him holding a remote, as well as balancing the food in his other hand.

“Dinner is ready darling. I decided to turn off the radio so we can properly concentrate on our conversation. The noise is always so distracting from the important things.”, a gentle smile on his face as he puts down the food.

“You didn´t need to make my favorite, Bruno.”, you softly said.

“No, I insist. It´s only natural for me to do. I love you so much, why wouldn´t I cook your favorite dish for you? You´ve been so stressed and on edge lately, I decided this was the least I could do. You´re so important to me after all.”

Bruno poured wine for the both of you and then sat down himself. You two made pleasant conversation while enjoying the food he made. You then decided to tell him what´s been on your mind lately, the strange things you´ve been seeing, all the red. He showed so much concern for you so of course you were going to tell him!

He purses his lips, his brows furrowing as he thinks for a bit before deciding to finally answer.

“Darling are you sure you´re okay? That sounds very serious. Have you been taking the pills I bought for you? Maybe you should take some more, just in case. You´ve been talking about some very strange memories the past few days. I´m concerned, y/n”.

Yes, Bruno had been giving you daily pills for as long as you can remember. He said they were good to relieve the stress and anxiety you had felt after the accident, so you always took them. And he seemed to be right with that! Whenever you forgot to take the pills, you would get a pounding headache, feeling as if your brain was about to explode. You also sometimes saw these strange things, just like you did today. It seemed like you forgot to take your pills once again. You didn´t think it was too bad though, they always made you feel a bit loopy, feeling as if a heavy fog clouded your mind. You felt relaxed but also very hazy. You weren´t sure if you liked the feeling, you always felt a bit clearer when you didn´t take them.

So when Bruno got up to bring them to you, you decided to stop him and told him that you didn´t want to take them anymore.

He stopped dead in tracks, shoulders slightly tensing before turning around to face you. He was frowning, very apparently not liking the idea.

“Darling, you need to take these pills, they are important for you.”, he told you with a strained smile.

But you didn´t want to, so you kept declining.

He grew almost desperate at your continued refusal to take the pills, looking very panicked as his eyes widened and he started to wildly wave his hands around as he tried to convince you.

“Y/n come on, don´t be silly now. You just don´t know any better. I don´t think that´s the right decision for you to take. I know what´s best for you! Please don´t ruin this. You´ll thank me later on. I love you so much amore, so your health is my top priority! Just trust your husband!”

Something about his insistence didn´t sit right with you but you didn´t want to anger him further. For some reason you knew that you should never make Bruno angry, so you relented in the end.

As Bruno visibly relaxed and got up to bring your pills, you decided to keep eating your food while pondering over what just happened.

Hahh, eating risotto always made you feel at home for some reason.

You woke up to an empty bed, your husband must have left for work already so you were on your own for now. You shifted your head to look at your nightstand, your daily pills already taken out of the box, ready for you to take. Come to think of it, this was how it always had been. You have never even seen the bottle the pills came in, Bruno always prepared everything for you.

For some reason, this new discovery gave you a feeling of anxiety. But why? He was your husband, why should he ever do something to harm you?

Still wanting to reassure yourself that everything was okay, you headed to the bathroom and looked for the medicine cabinet. It was supposed to be here somewhere. Looking around for a bit, you finally found the right bottle, you of course being able to recognize the size and the form of the pills you took daily by now. Carefully taking it out of the cabinet, you tried to read the label but were immediately confused by all of the complicated words written on it, so you just decided to look up the name on the front of it.

You were shocked when you looked them up and saw that these pills in particular were very infamous for their bad side effects, which caused them to not get sold anymore. These side effects included sleepiness, decreased concentration and extreme forgetfulness.

Extreme…forgetfulness?

You could swear you were hearing alarm bells ringing in your head. This couldn´t be. Was your own husband actively trying to repress your memories?! Does he not want you to remember something? But why? What reason could he possibly have? While you were lost in thought, you noticed he must have accidentally left the radio on, because it was blaring in the background again.

“Dead man now finally identified by coworkers as one Risotto Nero. The young man..”

You didn´t hear anything else anymore. Risotto Nero? Why was that name so familiar to you?

And then it happened.

You felt an intense headache, your brain feeling like it might burst out any moment. And then… you remembered.

Risotto Nero, your former boyfriend. You were super happy together and were even planning to get married once his work calmed down a bit. He was not usually a very expressive person but with you, he felt comfortable. He felt like he was finally understood, like he could be at peace.

And then you met him.

Well you didn´t really MEET him. You just bumped into him while walking on the sidewalk, you quickly apologizing and then moving on with your life quickly forgetting about the man.

But it wasn´t the same for him, oh no. When he bumped into you back then and saw your beautiful face as well as heard your wonderful voice, he was lovestruck. This couldn´t be a coincidence, fate had led you two together! You were meant to be together! But you didn´t see him. No matter how hard he tried to contact you again in a crowd, you didn´t recognize him. It couldn´t be. There must have been a reason. And he soon found his reason. This monstrosity of a man, Risotto Nero held you captive. He was trying to separate you two out of jealousy. If he wasn´t there, you two could finally be happy together! So he knew he had to do something. And that he did.

You can now remember that day clearly. You came home from grocery shopping when you saw it. The living room was a mess, broken vases, toppled over furniture, definitely signs of a fight. And in the middle of it laid your boyfriend Risotto. A large pool of blood flowed out of his wounds as he laid there motionless. Dead.

You couldn´t believe this was happening. You ran over to his body and quickly felt the tears gathering in your eyes as you let out a loud sob.

You then felt a touch on your back and immediately tensed up. No one else was supposed to be here, so who was this? Did the attacker come back to kill you as well??

You then felt the strangers hand shift, moving towards your face and then gently wiping away the tears that have gathered in your eyes. Moving your head to at least see the bastard that killed Risotto, you were surprised to see someone vaguely familiar. You didn´t think this was someone you personally knew but you could never forget someone with a fashion sense as unique as this. The white suit, that was now bathed in red, with the zippers, it was all so familiar yet you couldn´t place where you had seen this before. As you continued to ponder over this, the man then spoke up.

“Shh darling, please don´t cry. It hurts me to see you like this. You should be smiling! After all this time we can finally be together! I´ve been waiting so long to have you in my arms and now my wish has finally come true.”, he exclaimed while tightly wrapping his arms around your shaking form.

“You….you bastard! What did you do to Risotto?! Why did you kill him! How could you do this?! What the hell are you even talking about? Now we can finally be together? How could you possibly think I would want to have anything to do with you after this?! You monster!”, you screamed out while pounding your fists against his chest, wriggling around as much as you could. He couldn´t be serious, did he really think you would forgive him and want to be with him after he killed your boyfriend in cold blood?

“Please don´t be like that darling, everything is going to be okay. I did this for us! I love you way more than anyone ever could! Just wait until I show you the house I renovated just for you, you´re going to love it!”

This man was definitely not sane and you desperately needed to get away this instant. Searching your brain for any escape plan that you could come up with, you had an idea. It was risky and most likely not going to work but you needed to try anything you could while you still had the chance. Who knew what would happen to you once you were brought to this house.

So summoning all of your courage, you raised your leg and kicked the man where the sun don´t shine and decided to make a run for it as he kneeled down in pain. This was your only chance to get away from him, you had to make it count. As you ran along the streets of Naples, you thought over what you could do to possibly escape this creep. You didn´t think going to the police would do you any good so what were you supposed to do? You thought possibly the best course of action would be to try and leave the country but would you even be able to accomplish that?

You were once again pulled out of your thoughts as you heard loud footsteps behind you. Turning your head, you were able to see that the man had now almost caught up with you. Shit shit shit what were you going to do now? He was so close to getting you!

“Amore please don´t run! This is for your best, trust me! You will be so much happier with me!”, the deluded man shouted after you. This was crazy, absolutely crazy. Watching him some more, you suddenly saw his eyes dramatically widening, his mouth forming an “o” as he then called out to you.

“No wait! Stop!!”

Stop? Pftt he wished that you-

CRASH

All you saw was red once again.

The red traffic light and the red car that hit you were all you could see before passing out and everything fading to black.

And this was the truth of what truly happened to you. Looking at the bottle of pills in your hand, it was still so hard to believe. So all this time, Bruno has just been manipulating you? He gave you these pills to prevent you from remembering what happened and played the role of a loving husband when he killed your boyfriend in cold blood. You felt sick to your stomach and your legs were shaking. You had to get away from here. You had to leave this country. You had to leave now while you were still alone, you still had a chance you-

Cliiick

You heard the sound of the front door opening.

Bruno was home.

You tried to keep your cool when he entered the room and asked about your day. If you got heated now, everything would only get worse. You wanted him to be blissfully unaware that you recalled your memories now, that the whole gig was up. Who knew what he would do when he didn´t need to pretend anymore? You had to repress a shudder at the thought.

“Y/n? Is everything okay? You´re being awfully quiet. Did something happen?”, he inquired now, looking vaguely concerned, his brows furrowing in worry.

You didn´t know what to say. Who knows what would happen if you told him the truth? That was an absolute no-go as far as you were concerned. But you also didn´t think you could get away with lying, you´ve come to notice that Bruno is very sharp with these kinds of things. So not knowing what to do, you just kept quiet.

That must have been the wrong choice because he looked a bit angry now.

“What happened y/n? Tell me. I promise I won´t be mad! Why won´t you talk to me anymore?”

More deafening silence.

Okay he DEFINITELY looked angry now. His shoulders tensing as he bit his lip, probably trying to prevent himself from raising his voice too much.

“Amore please talk with me! I love you so much you have no idea, but I´m slowly losing my patience. Stop being so difficult.”

You couldn´t help but kind of snap at that comment. You were being difficult? Well look who´s talking! He freaking killed your boyfriend and basically kidnapped you! He played with your memories and manipulated your feelings! He was trying to make you fall in love with him, to imprison you in this house and never let you go! He was sickening!

So as you were standing there, trying to stop your ragged breathing, you felt pure terror in your stomach as you saw Bruno´s facial expression change from an angry one to one full of shock. Wait shit. Did you really just say that out loud? Why now of all times? Why did the universe hate you so much?

“What…how…you remember? But how could that have happened? I guess it doesn´t matter now. Y/n I love you! I killed him for us! He could never love you like I do, he doesn´t deserve you! But you weren’t able to see that, he blinded you. So of course I had to get rid of him! You looked so scared back then, it broke my heart! When I saw you get hit by that car, I almost lost my mind. I was so scared you wouldn´t make it so when I saw you wake up and not remember anything, I knew this was my chance. It was fated to be! So I´m sorry for not being upfront with you about this but I´m sure we will be able to work it out.”

“Work this out? You want to work this out? Hell no! I´m leaving! I don´t want to stay here for even a second longer!, you screamed out in anger as you tried to get up.

Keyword: Tried

You felt an absolute numbness in your legs and you weren´t able to move them at all. Looking down in surprise, you were terrified to see them completely missing from your body! How could this happen? What is going on? No no no no! You felt the tears streaming down your face as you came to accept the truth that you wouldn´t be able to escape from this. You weren´t able to escape from him.

“Look what you made me do darling! Why did you have to say such hurtful things to me? You want to leave? I won´t let you. We were meant to be together, I knew from the moment I first saw you. So I won´t ever let you leave my sight, do you understand? So please don´t fight me if you ever want to have your legs back, okay? You can do that for me can´t you, amore mio?”

“Let´s make some new happy memories together and forget about everything that happened!”

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Wowee this ended up being almost 5k words! I´ve never written anything this long so I´m kind of proud of this one^^

Also remember the outline I was talking about? Well I showed it to @naranciabestboi for some thoughts and we both agreed that you needed to see this little bit of the structure I wrote down. This was for towards the end when reader remembers that bruno killed risotto:

Thank you guys once again for reading my writing and supporting me so much <3

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