#not even just a year ago

[tigerjpg]

nothing makes me go "ooooh we are NOT the same" quite like reading some post about how people talk with their parents about their interests. what do you mean you told your father about stevebucky. what do you mean he asked further questions

#i won a poetry contest years ago and not a single person in my family asked what it was about. you're an alien to me #not even saying this in a self pitying way i just can't conceive of a dynamic like that

[possessable]

Hello i'm a normal person here's some stuff i drew to illustrate different traits different "person getting controlled" tropes can have

edit: obligatory possession shorthand code link because people seem to be using this like the possession code but just. without the code part

edit: DO NOT BE HORNY ON MY POST 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

#if you see tumblr flagging this its literally not mature i dont know why it got flagged #i like how you can see the artstyle in this change because i drew the first couple a year ago and then picked it up again intermittently #this aws just an excuse to draw a bunch of tiny possessed guys. ''what am i supposed to do with a possession hyperfixation its not like you #can draw possession fanart'' Yes You Can If you really Believe In yourslef #This isn't even all the traits i can think of there's four more but they seem kind of boring to draw and are mostly self explanatory #Less Unique my Ass #ThePossessionHyperfixationIsNeverEnding

[7roaches]

sorry that took like an hour i stopped to eat dinner heres my idea

#my art #adventure time #simon petrikov #betty grof #trans #lesbian #petrigrof #ion think i needa tag this for anything theyre both clothed & its not suggestive #i think simon isnt scared of needles but he cant make himself do it himself so betty does it for him #idk how he got by before meeting betty #i also dont think i needa tag this for eva spoilers considering it came out uh #28 years ago #FUCK I JUST REALIZED I FORGOT THE ENTIRE POINT OF THE COMIC HOLD ON #ok 10 min later im back #also i think this kinda implies golbetty is flesh underneath like an eva #ok i think thats all #and in case i dont see you good morning good evening and goodnight

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[sims3melancholic]

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#sims 4 #ts4 #ts4cc #sims 4 cc #sims 4 eyebrows #it was fun to create and im really happy w them #i love this brows SO SO much #especially 99 and 103 #just look at them!! perfection for me #101 is me trying to be creative 😭☠️ #im so happy to see my progress w eyebrows creating bc drawing for me is struggle cause im 0 at this #and 3 years ago i was SO scared even try to create them!!! #oh times #sims 4 brows #sims 4 male eyebrows #sims 4 male brows #sims 4 female eyebrows #sims 4 female brows #ts4mm #sims 4 maxis match #sims 4 maxis cc #sims 4 maxis mix #sims 4 genetics

[kaninchen-reblogs]

I think this is the funniest fucking notifications I've ever gotten in Morrowind.

#kanny says things #i have no idea which mod i have installed thats telling me im on my period #i installed most of these mods YEARS ago and i just recently got the urge to play again #so i dont even remember like 90% of the mods i have installed #im literally just in the middle of turning in some mages guild quests #and practicing a few spells #and now i guess my pussy decided to activate #morrowind #the elder scrolls

[voltaical-art]

im in agony. a little self indulgent but I think wyll deserves to be told he's loved and have a small breakdown about it

#bg3 #wyll ravengard #tav #wyll x tav #baldur's gate 3 #voltaical ocs #bishop #finally downloaded one (1) font bc i had too much dialog for this #i dont even hate ulder taht much i just thing wyll should talk about ANY complicated feelings he has about him. #also the way wyll always seems to be quoting him like pls what are YOUR THOUGHTS not some cryptic thing your father told you 10 years ago #and rlly if you take the way wyll describes the situation as hard truth #ALL the justification Ulder had for banishing his son #are conclusions WYLL has come to on his OWN since ulder only said ‘one word to him’ #LIKE his relationship with his father could have been SO interesting but wyll isn’t allowed to have ANY introspection at all #so he just apologizes and wyll continues to try and please him

[milimeters-morales]

PROWLER MILES USED TO SMILE EXACTLY LIKE THIS. THIS WAS HIM. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE CALL A FUCKING AMBULANCE IM LOSING IT

#HE WAS LITERALLY JUST A BABY AND HE STILL IS TO ME. #HOW LONG AGO DID HIS DAD EVEN DIE???? I ASSUME A YEAR OR MORE??? BECAUSE LIKE. AARON DIED A YEAR AND FOUR MONTHS AGO SO #BUT AARON LOOKS WAY OLDER HERE SO #MAYBE ITS BEEN LONGER. HOW LONG HAS MILES G BEEN THE PROWLER PLEAZDEE I NEED TO KNOW #miles morales #spiderman #spider man #prowler miles #atsv spoilers #across the spider verse #across the spiderverse #atsv #spiderman atsv #m&m posts

[mispelled]

Cant believe they carried the entire show and nothing bad happened to them ever. and they were t4t

#augh ough #every so often i get sucked into starkid again and damn. they really got me this time #i think this is actually my first time drawing fanart for starkid aside from one doodle from a million years ago of tommy jr from avpsy #mispelled draws #misp draws #starkid #nerdy prudes must die #starkid npmd #npmd #nerdy prudes spoilers #npmd spoilers #npmd fanart #hatchetfield #ruth npmd #npmd richie #richie lipschitz #i forget ruths last name uhhhh #oh #ruth fleming #i dont even know if they have a ship name lol i just got here #anyway ruth is extremely non binary to me #richie is probably talking about anime

[bixels]

The idea that uni protesters are "elitist ivy-league rich kids larping as revolutionaries" on Twitter and Reddit and even here is so fucking funny to me if you actually know anything about the student bodies at these unis. Take it from someone who's going to one of the biggest private unis in the US, 80% of the peers I know are either from the suburbs or an apartment somewhere in America, children of immigrants, or here on a student visa. I've heard about one-percenter students, but I've never met one in person. Like, don't get me wrong, the institution as a whole is still very privileged and white. I've talked with friends and classmates about feeling weird or dissonant being here and coming from such a different background. But in my art program, I see BIPOC, disabled, queer, lower-income students and faculty trying to deconstruct and tear that down and make space every day. So to take a cursory glance at a crowd of student protesters in coalitions that are led by BIPOC & 1st/2nd-gen immigrant students and HQ'd in ethnic housings and student organizations and say, "ah. children of the elite." Get real.

#also idk how to tell you this but even if it were true. wealthy children potentially sacrificing their educational careers to protest is #a good thing actually. idk how to tell you that caring about people from other nations is good #personal #“this war has nothing to do with most students cuz nobody's getting drafted” idk how to explain to you that we should be angry #that our tuitions of 10s of thousands of dollars that we pay every year for an education is being used to fund a genocidal campaign #also the implication that if you go to a uni institution you are automatically privileged by participation no matter your bg #i didn't /want/ to go to this school. i was supposed to go to a school with an art/animation program. but i realized my immigrant #parents have been working their whole lives to get me here. and turning the opportunity down would be a disservice to their sacrifice #this is getting into convos of “what 2nd gen kids owe their parents” which is different for everyone but. yeah #i just get pissed off at seeing people misrepresenting student bodies as “wealthy” and “privileged” and “elite” when it's such a blatant li #i remember a year ago a friend told me they can't fly home to hong kong for winter break because the plane tickets are too expensive #so they have to find temporary housing around the area #last quarter for a film doc class my film partner made a doc on a small group of marxist grad students from india discussing praxis #during a rally a few months ago in response to police presence the coalition invited palestinian students to speak about their experiences #and lead songs and read poems they wrote. these are STUDENTS. are they elitist too? #this is not to disregard my own personal privilege either. #this whole narrative's just to rationalize a lack of empathy to me. seeing a 19yo student get shot by a rubber bullet and your first #reaction is “HAW! HAW! bet richy rich didn't see THAT coming when she put on her terrorist hood!” #newsflash. these big uni campuses are HAUNTED by the violence of past protests and revolutions and police brutality. we know. #why do you think these coalitions have been making reinforced barricades at record speed

[drunkenlion]

I love love love how Larian made Astarion:

Avoiding having sex with Tav altogether if you kinda have a wholesome relationship after he confesses that he really likes Tav for real and not just to secure himself a protector/ally. It’s so cute that he just takes some time to figure out what sex means to him in terms of genuine connection with someone and not just a manipulation tactic which has been a behaviour forced on him by Cazador 😭

He is sooo insecure about it, that I already found two instances of him mentioning it: when twin drows in Baldur’s Gate offer their services either to Tav or both to Tav and Astarion. He refuses and asks if the reason Tav would want this is the lack of sex between them. And the second time when Halsin offers to have a poly relationship and you ask Astarion about it (which he is in general chill about) but once again asks Tav if the reason is not Astarion not having sex with them.

Poor Astarion is still having fear that the only thing that can make someone be interested in him is sex. It makes me feel stuff 😰

#astarion #bg3 astarion #baldur’s gate 3 #bg3 companions #I just love this train wreck of an elf so much #he’s kinda evil sometimes but he’s also not? #he’s theatrical but also sometimes is too open and awkward and quiet? #damn he stole my heart 2 years ago but now that I can see his development it’s even better #and Neil newborn did such an amazing job with voiceover #love all the intonations in his voice

[gray-warden]

I just realized I never posted photos of this really pretty harvestman i came across a while back. Note the green pedipalps and the dark and light spots on its back.

#opiliones #arachnids #chelicerata #bugs #harvestman #bugblr #the light spots were a very light green iirc (it's been a while) but they just look white here #there's a photoset of a really cool harvestman going around and it reminded me of this one and i realized i never posted these pics #spider #(ik they arent spiders but i'm tagging it as that for blacklist purposes #bc i imagine that someone who's really scared of spiders probably doesnt care that actually opiliones are not spiders just close relatives) #i think its so cool how i didnt even know opiliones were a thing until a couple of years ago and now i see them all the time #turns out they're pretty common around here #(not that i never saw them before i mustve just assumed they were spiders) #theyre usually not as pretty as this one though #most of the ones i see are just black or dark brown #also i have a massive backlog of pictures ive never posted of bugs and other nature stuff #my stuff #my posts #outside tag #nature

[critter-of-habit]

Look I'm not saying I can predict the future BUT

#this means we get Barriss next #its just facts #I drew this 3 years ago before we even had a live action ahsoka #ahsoka #ahsoka spoilers

[puppyeared]

id fumble him so bad

#really really rushed but ill probably go back and clean these up tmrw anyway #i havent played stardew valley but ive been meaning to because i have a little crush on this guy ^_^ hes cute #idk why but smth about him is really endearing. like between him and sunburst i feel like theres a pattern here but idk what #i guess my type is boys that whimper #the last two images are based on a real conversation i had with my doctor a few years ago lol. deadass stared at me for a good 2 minutes #i wanna make a farmersona too...... if my minecraft gameplay is anything to go by id probably play with animals all day instead of #actually farming........ can i just do livestock in stardew.. i dont have a green thumb i managed to kill a succulent once...... #actually idk if my computer is even strong enough to run steam but i dont wanna get it on my phone. maybe ill get the microsoft download #unless stardew has its own website like minecraft. i really dont know anything abt it so im going in blind from the start #my art #myart #doodles #puppysona #sona #sdv #sdv harvey #stardew valley #whats funny about this is i have a classmate who kinda looks like if brian david gilbert and harvey had a baby. i havent told him this

[mumblesplash]

heartbreaking: this viral post is saying things you completely agree with in the most irritating way possible

#mumbling #goD #thinking about that one cringing = pearl clutching post i saw a while ago #legitimately good points and the only time i’ve ever seen someone point out the linguistic shift #of ‘cringe’ going from verb to adjective and how that takes the blame off of the people DOING the cringing #like yeah! that’s it that’s the thing i’ve been trying to figure out how to say!! #the insidious shift from cringe as an action of the beholder to a property of the beheld is not only worth examining #but demonstrates a seriously important way our brains can be affected over time by language #that was something i didn’t even notice! sure it bothered me but i didn’t know how to express WHY #and i think it’s so cool to see someone finally manage to articulate smth that’s been pissing me off for years #HOWEVER #my god was op’s phrasing annoying the hell out of me for some reason #just written in such a grating writing style i couldn’t bring myself to reblog it even though i really wanted to

[k-kaez]

saw a comment and just had to say something, new joel girlies(gender-neutral) we're called jeremys, don't ask why, its written in the scriptures and foretold by god(joel)

edit: actually please ask, its joel's best moments #jeremy4lyfe

edit #2: check comments if you want an explanation as well if u can't be bothered to watch the video

edit #3: i was rewatching xlife and this is where he just decided we were called jeremy so,,, come one, come all and become jeremy today!

#smallishbeans #joel smallishbeans #hermitcraft #put that tag there so more people will know #jeremyism is NOT! a cult #just a very cool awesome religion 😎👍 #lol i wonder how many people actually know this reference #wasnt even that long ago #it was three years ago guys ☝️🤓 #Youtube