#the bookending of this scene is just perfect

[eleanorenchanted]

#free! #free! the final stroke #free! the final stroke part 2 #free! iwatobi swim club #rin matsuoka #haruka nanase #rinharu #harurin #sharkbait #the bookending of this scene is just perfect #i cry every time i watch it #i am a well woman i promise #my gifs #my edit

[sundrop-writes]

Kisses Like Fire Whiskey

Fred Weasley x Fem!Gryffindor!Reader

Summary:

When you come back from a long healing apprenticeship in France, you and Fred catch up over drinks, reminiscing about your days as mischievous rebels. In the drunken haze, some important things are realized.

Fred Weasley x Fem!Gryffindor!Reader. Best Friends to Lovers. Fluff (with a slight bit of Angst). Set post Deathly Hallows and during Goblet of Fire.

Word Count: 7,500

Harry Potter Masterlist | AO3 Link

Full list of warnings and author's notes below the cut.

Warnings: this is bookended with scenes that take place after the war, but obviously this is a Fred Lives AU; part of this takes place after main storyline of Deathly Hallows and part of it takes place in a flashback during Goblet of Fire (when Fred and the reader are in their sixth year); the reader and Fred are the same age; while part of this takes places post Deathly Hallows, there isn't mentions of the war; it's never mentioned exactly how long the reader was away, but the reader and Fred are both in their early 20s in the bookended parts; drinking and drunkenness are major plot points in this fic, as well as underage drinking; underage characters being in a bar/pub; Fred and the reader both drink, but there are mentions of Fred seeming more sober than the reader/handling his alcohol better; they are drunk to the point of lowering their inhibitions, but not to the point of passing out or forgetting things; mentions of George x Katie Bell as a background ship; mentions of splinching/the dangers of Apparating while drunk (does not actually happen in the fic, everyone is fine); mentions of vomiting due to over consumption of alcohol (doesn't happen to any of the main characters of this fic, it's a very small background element); passing mention of a cursed object that makes people spit up their own blood; creepy men approach the reader (and Fred defends her) - minor sexual harassment from older men toward the reader; this does use Y/N (I started out as a Quizilla girly, I will live and die by Y/N); this is mostly just mutual pining and fluff with a love confession at the end. So please enjoy!!

A/N: when I read the original request, I was inspired to take it a lot further, and after writing The Patron Saint of Liars and Fakes, I have realized that I really loving writing simplistic fics that are mutual pining that turns into a love confession. It's so much fun.

...

“So then - so then - Bill says: ‘where’s Percy?’, and Mum looks around the table and realises Perce is even there.” George chuckled brightly, topping off the telling of another one of their chaotic childhood stories. 

“‘Course, Mum blamed it on us.” Fred said, rolling his eyes. 

“As if she was wrong!” You argued, reaching out and smacking him on the shoulder playfully. 

Your words were louder to your own ears than you had intended to say them, slurring slightly on your lips. Perhaps you had more to drink than you had realised, but you were simply having fun catching up with your dearest, oldest friends. So you couldn’t bring yourself to truly care or view it as a problem. 

You were simply overjoyed to see Fred and George again. 

You were visiting England for the first time in years, and naturally, the Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes shop had been your first stop. You had grown up with the twins - since your first year at Hogwarts together, they had been two of your closest friends. Ever since you had been sorted into Gryffindor with them, the three of you had been thick as thieves. Right from the moment you had suggested to them that they actually unscrew a toilet seat lid and send it to their little sister Ginny in the post when they had initially just been joking about doing so. Ginny had found it highly amusing - their mother, not so much. 

But when you met Molly for the first time in person, you were always on her good side. You were very good at playing the ‘perfect angel’ in front of authority figures (unlike the twins). So you could very easily bat your eyelashes and say a few sweet things, as well as being on your best behaviour on the surface, before sneaking around with the twins at night and helping them with their pranks - not that anyone else ever suspected you of doing so. 

You were the perfect accomplice for them. Someone who was labelled as a goody-two-shoes who was down for mischief at any time. 

You had been slightly heartbroken when you found out that they were planning to quit their Seventh Year partyway through in order to start their joke shop. You knew that it had always been a dream of theirs, and it was your dream to see them succeed in it. But a large part of you had been hoping to graduate with your best friends by your side. They had offered for you to come with them, of course. They told you that you could have a very fulfilling career at the shop. But you had other plans for yourself. 

So you watched them ride off on their brooms, cheering and hollering for them alongside everyone else. And after your graduation, you had come to visit the shop in its full glory, seeing its whimsical beauty with your own eyes before you left England. As much as you hated that your lives had taken such different paths, you admired them deeply for succeeding. 

Since then, you had been in France. You had taken on a prestigious healing apprenticeship in order to become a high level Healer. It was something you had always dreamed of doing - helping people through the skilled art of healing. 

Perhaps, in some ways, it was a career choice inspired partially by your two best friends - seeing them blow themselves up or get horrible boils testing their own products, you wanted to be able to soothe the side effects faster. And you knew that there were plenty more children out there like them. Children who would fall from trees pretending to be a dragon or lose their teeth trying to eat a deck of Exploding Snap, children who needed gentle understanding from a Healer rather than scolding. 

You had recently finished up your apprenticeship, and you were hoping to get a job at St. Mungo’s to be closer to the people you always viewed as family. But even just stepping foot back in the twins’ shop felt like home. You had been greeted with tight hugs and so much chatter between them about missing you that you could barely decipher the words between two voices. They had invited you up to the flat above the shop for a drink - so now, hours later, you were quite tipsy and feeling the best that you had in years. 

“You know boys, I haven’t - I haven’t been this tossed off my tits in quite a while!” You announced loudly, pausing between words to let out a small hiccup, signifying just how drunk you were. 

You weren’t at the level of drunk where things were unpleasant - not where the room was spinning and you were on the verge of passing out, battling with nausea. But your normal sense of proprietary had definitely been tossed out the window, you felt fuzzy around the edges, and everything felt delightfully warm. Especially considering you had been drinking Fire Whiskey. 

You hadn’t had a drink all throughout your apprenticeship, as much as the other young people working with you encouraged you to ‘take a load off’ every once and a while. Your work was something that you took very seriously (especially when Fred and George weren’t around to tempt you with pranks and daily mischief). So this was the first time in a long time that you had actually taken the time to relax, and the alcohol was hitting you a lot harder than even you realised. 

The boys chuckled at your words, George turning bright red from how hard he was laughing. Perhaps the booze was hitting him pretty hard too. While Fred’s eyes were dancing with that brightness they always had when he was having fun, he didn’t seem quite as sloppy. You hadn’t been paying attention, but he likely didn’t have as much to drink, and had simply been enjoying your company the entire time. 

“You know, I really missed you, Fred and George.” You said, pure sincerity dripping through your tone, your affection amplified in your chest by your drunkenness. You couldn’t hold yourself back - your emotions bubbling to the surface without your consent. “And I really, really missed you, Fred.” 

You turned to him, putting a warm hand on his shoulder, your touch practically burning up through the sleeve of his silken shirt (you were surprised by how nicely the twins dressed now that they were established bussinessmen). You hated that you couldn’t hold back the need to emphasise the fact that you had missed Fred just a bit more. But he had been on your mind a lot more than his brother had, as scarily similar as they were. 

Even if you had barely admitted it to yourself, throughout all your years at Hogwarts, you had a romantic inclination towards Fred. 

It was never something you had acted on, for fear of ruining the amazing friendship that the two of you had. But as your visit to England grew closer and closer, you found yourself losing focus on your work and thinking about him more and more. You wondered if he had found someone - you wondered if his good looks, his charm, his humour had landed him a wife in the time that you had been gone. It wouldn’t have surprised you if, during the time you had been gone, he had married or even had kids.

Obviously he had a wonderful career nailed down, so a family would have been the natural next step for him.  

Those thoughts made you approach the shop’s door with equal parts dread and excitement. You eagerly wanted to see him again but didn’t want to see that there was a ring on his finger. You had been all too happy to find out during your long, winding ‘catch up’ conversation that, in fact, he was still single. George had brought up that fact more than once, actually, nagging on his brother’s lonely status like it was the most recent funny joke he could prod at. 

When you heard him talk about it, there was that insecurity still bubbling beneath the surface - the thought that you had missed your chance, or that Fred had never been interested in you romantically at all. It was something that couldn’t even be knocked away by booze, and that was gnawing at you now that storytime was winding down. 

Fred and George exchanged a look - one of those silent conversations that could only be had through micro-expressions because of their closeness as twins. It was something that had always deeply irritated you during your days at Hogwarts, desperately trying to decipher if it meant ‘close to expulsion’ trouble or simply ‘skipping a class’ trouble.

“Well, would you look at the time,” George said, loudly and rather cartoonishly as he looked at his watch. It was something that you likely would have found suspect if you weren’t feeling hazy and drunk. “I told Katie I would pop over to hers sometime this weekend, so I should get going,” 

Something that had come as a brilliant surprise to you: finding out that George was now engaged to Katie Bell. 

Not only were you shocked to know that George seemed more than eager to ‘settle down’ and get married, but you were entirely curious about how they came to be as a couple. Especially considering that, as far as you knew, she had always seemed to find the twins’ pranks more annoying than anything else. 

But you supposed that annoyance and attraction were two twigs on the same branch, the tree just needed to be shaken a little for something romantic to happen. The two of them hadn’t officially moved in together yet, as much as George talked about her with those sweet, rose-coloured lenses, and seemed to want to spend all his time around her. The twins still lived in the flat above the shop, two twin beds in the bedroom, as they always had in their room at the Burrow. But from the way Fred remarked on it, and from what you had seen glancing into their bedroom when you had gotten up to use the toilet, George was over at Katie’s far more than he was at their flat. 

You couldn’t help but to find it sweet. George was in love. 

It made you happy for him, knowing that he had found someone good for him. But thinking about it caused a pang in your chest as you wondered if Fred was lonely. You knew that loneliness certainly wasn’t a feeling that he was used to. If it was you or George, or one of his many other brothers, he always had someone at his side to keep him company. 

You could only imagine what those nights were like - when the shop closed up and George popped off to his soon to be wife’s place, leaving Fred to nothing but the quiet. (You knew that Weasleys were never good with quiet - part of the reason that the twins were the way that they were.) 

George peeled himself off the floor, where the three of you had been sitting around the coffee table in the lounge. Like a gangly baby deer, he began stumbling about due to his own drunkenness before he gained a proper footing and finally managed to stand up straight. You let out a snorting laugh at the sight and Fred - very clearly the most sober of the three of you - rushed out of his seat to grab George by the shoulders, making sure that his brother was alright. 

“You sure that you’re okay to Apparate, Georgie?” Fred asked.

That kindness, that caring - it was something people often overlooked when they saw Fred Weasley. But it was one of the things that had drawn you to him the most. He was such a sweet person, and he cared about the people in his life with such a ferocity that it made your soul ache just to know that you were one of them. 

“I’ll be fine, Freddie.” George replied. 

Fred picked up George’s coat and began helping him into it, and you barely paid attention to the hushed conversation that the two of them had as you picked up the large (now rather light) bottle of Fire Whiskey and poured yourself another drink. 

You caught something online the lines of ‘just go for it, for Merlin’s sake’ - very strained and annoyed, but you honestly had no clue what they were talking about. As you took a sip of your drink - you truly didn’t care. 

Fred heaved out a sigh and then George disappeared with a crack. You craned your neck to look at the spot where he had been, just wanting to make sure that there was no blood or unsightly pieces of George left behind. There weren’t any - he had done fine.

“Havin’ another one, are we?” Fred remarked, walking around the coffee table to collapse onto the plush couch behind your back. 

You chugged the rest of the Fire Whiskey from your glass all in one go, growling slightly as it burned sharply down your throat before you put the glass down once again. 

“I’m celebrating!” You cheered loudly - again, much louder than you intended it to be. “I missed my best friends so much. It’s so - so good to be home.” 

“But apparently you missed me just a bit more?” Fred chuckled, referring to your comment from before. 

You moved to get up on the couch with him, and found your legs unsteady beneath you. Fred saw what you were doing and put a hand on your upper arm, hauling you back to sit on the cushions beside him. You moaned quietly at the warmth of his large hand on your bare skin, exposed by the camisole you were wearing. At one point, you had been wearing a nice cardigan, but you had stripped out of it as the alcohol drove your body temperature up.

You leaned back into the couch, and cuddled up against him. His body was soft and muscled at the same time, and he felt so nice against you. With your inhibitions lowered, you could see no fault in snuggling tightly into his side and laying your head on his chest. You wanted to simply enjoy the physical affection from a person you had missed so dearly. 

You didn’t see the pure warring on Fred’s face as you did this - the confliction and yearning and hurt flashing over his features. He had missed you too, but he knew that you had missed him as a friend, just as a good friend, and not as the ‘one that got away’ that he had been thinking about every damn day since. But he could be cool about this, he told himself. He wouldn’t let his stupid feelings get in the way. 

After a moment of pushing those pesky feelings back down, he finally relaxed into your touches and wrapped an arm around you, lazily brushing his fingers across the bare skin of your arm on the other side. You sighed happily at the feeling. From this close, he could smell the feminine floral waft of your perfume in combination with the hot cinnamon of the Fire Whiskey. And though it only made him yearn more, it was heaven. 

He was all too happy to have you this close rather than you being so far away in France. He was happy to have you home. 

“Do you want to stay the night?” He asked. “George’s bed will be empty, of course.” 

He added on that second part quickly - he wanted you to feel comfortable, didn’t want to put any pressure on you to keep up this closeness, even if you seemed cuddly and affectionate because of your drunken state. 

Originally, you had been planning to get a room at The Leaky Cauldron, but the twins’ shop had been your very first stop, and they had torn your suitcase out of your hands to bring it upstairs for you, so it was currently sitting off to the side of the lounge with your coat draped over it. And you never did get that room. Now, you realised it was laughable to think that you’d be staying anywhere but with friends, especially with the Molly Weasley hospitality baked right into them. You had to assume that even if George wasn’t at Katie’s, he would have slept on the couch so that you could take his bed anyway. 

“Freddie, you know, I don’t think I’m going to get very far.” You said. “You - you got me pretty d-drunk.” 

Fred smiled to himself. “Ah, I see. Once again, it is all my fault.” 

It was something you did at large during your days at Hogwarts. You blamed him for yourself being late to class, you getting detentions, the few times you had ended up on Molly’s bad side. When in reality, you had always been a cheerful, willing participant in their chaos, you had always ‘blamed’ him for dragging you into it. But it only made him tempt you into more trouble. 

“It is,” You sighed, turning your head to give him a wide grin. “You always g-get me into trouble.” 

Fred let out a quiet laugh at this, and you laid your head on this chest once again. The two of you mulled in the comfortable silence for a few moments before you thought of something. 

“You know, this-s reminds me, of - of the first time you got me drunk.” You told him with a laugh. 

“Oh, god, back in sixth year?” He posed, returning to the memory himself. “That was epic. I still don’t know if I’d call it an epic disaster, or epic fun.” 

“Bit of both.” You mumbled quietly. “Always is with you.” 

Sitting there, curled up next to the lovely warmth of him, you remembered the night so fondly. 

… 

Leave it to Fred Weasley to pull you out of bed at half past two in the morning with no solid explanation as to why, aside from ‘we have plans’. 

When you asked him why he couldn’t conduct those plans with George, as he usually did, he simply smirked and said that George had plans of his own. Which deeply worried you - but you tried your best to ignore it. You knew from experience that Fred wasn’t a walking troublemaker all the time. 

In fact, the events of just a short week ago had proven that to you. He had invited you to the Yule Ball (as friends, of course) and the entire evening had been absolutely pleasant. No pranks - no water balloons, no coloured dye, no buckets of feathers, no charmed objects, no floods. It had been nothing but a delightful night of dancing and chatting with your friends. 

Even now, as Fred pulled you into the mouth of a very small passageway that you had never seen before (one that caused you to slump over in order to walk through it), you pulled your scarf tighter around yourself and tried your hardest not to worry about what he might be up to. At the very least, if he was planning something large and disruptive, you would know about it, so that you wouldn’t be on the receiving end.

He had told you that these ‘plans’ involved going outdoors, so you had bundled up well, because there was still quite a few feet of snow outside and it was chilly, seeing as it was so late at night. But you hadn’t expected it to be so damn cold, walking in a random mystery tunnel underneath the school. Again, you had no clue where he was taking you or where the thing even led - you were simply glad when it became tall enough for you to straighten your back up. 

“Where are we going, Fred?” You demanded harshly. 

“You’ll see.” Fred told you, throwing a wicked grin over his shoulder at you as he continued to lead you forward through the darkness - the light of his wand being the only thing leading the way in the musty old tunnel. 

“Nothing good ever happens when you say those words.” You replied, heaving a deep sigh. 

“Well, perhaps, you could keep your mind open this time.” He said brightly. “Loosen up. Be open to all the possibilities that the universe has to offer you,” 

You rolled your eyes at this. He was trying to direct your attention away from whatever scheme he had planned, that much was immediately clear to you. 

“Is this an escape tunnel out of the country because you finally did something bad enough for your mother to kill you?” You joked. “Let me guess, you’re meeting George in Germany? What was it that finally pushed her over the edge? Did she find out that you two took bets at the World Cup? Did she find out about the-?” 

Your words were abruptly cut off when Fred tapped his wand on the wall in front of him. It was a seemingly a dead end wall made of stone, keeping the two of you trapped at the end of the tunnel. But when he whispered some incantation under his breath, the stone began to grind loudly and it parted ways - letting in a gust of cold air from the outside, revealing the way out. 

Fred stepped forward and you continued to follow him. As the stone grinded closed behind the two of you (now disguised as nothing more than a large, natural boulder) you gaped with shock as you saw a cluster of lights just down the hill and you quickly realised what it was. 

“Hogsmeade.” You declared quietly, entirely shocked that you had walked through a dirty tunnel and ended up here. 

Somehow, without getting caught - without setting off any charms that should supposedly be in place to keep the students on the school’s grounds. 

Fred nodded proudly, grinning at you.

“How-?” You gaped. 

“I have my ways, don’t I?” Fred said, his chest visibly puffing out with pride. 

You decided not to question it. Especially because you fully understood it now - Fred was bored, he knew a way out of the school, and he simply wanted to have fun in Hogsmeade instead of laying in bed that night. 

Fred took a hold of your hand as the two of you walked into town, and you took a quiet joy in observing Hogsmeade at night. Quite a few of the shops were closed, due to it being so late, which did make you wonder why Fred had even bothered to bring you there. 

But he soon answered your question when he brought you to The Three Broomsticks - which was lit up, bustling and lively at this time. You knew that the front door was enchanted to alert the owner of underage wizards trying to pass through at certain times. Before you could even wonder what Fred’s plan was for that one - he led you around to the back, and he caught the back door out of someone’s hand as they ran outside and began puking in a snowbank, obviously unable to handle their liquor. 

The two of you slipped in the back door completely undetected, seeing as it didn’t have those same enchantments to alert the owner of your presence. You began tingling with the glee that you always wore whenever Fred pulled you along to perform some mischief. You felt so joyous when you paired up to share wicked secrets with him. Fred had a talent for getting away with things (and other times, he so fabulously didn’t) - but he got away with a lot more than anybody ever realised, right under their noses. You felt clever just being around him most of the time.

With all the confidence in the world, still holding your hand, Fred pushed past some other rowdy patrons and waltzed right up to the bar. He tossed down a few Sickles (bet money that he and George had won from the World Cup, you could guarantee) and you couldn’t help but to grin at him as so confidently placed an order. 

“Two Fire Whiskeys, please.” He announced, never once skipping a beat or faltering as any other underage person in a bar would. 

It was strange to say, but Fred wore playful deception so well. You knew that you were staring at him with intense attraction written all over your face as you admired his antics. You simply hoped that he wouldn’t catch the love dopey look on your face and call you out on it. 

“Coming right up, love-” Madam Rosmerta began to comply with his request without issue, but she took pause when she looked up from drying a glass with a rag long enough to truly look at the two of you. 

That was the moment you thought it was over, for sure. You thought that she would send an angry owl up to Hogwarts, and the two of you would be done for. You began to imagine what kind of sick and twisted punishment McGonagall would have in store for the two of you - scrubbing cauldrons for weeks, trimming all the grass on the Quidditch pitch with scissors. 

But somehow, Fred was a lot more clever than that. He wasn’t going to give up and simply let himself be caught. 

“Aren’t you two a little… young to be in here?” She posed, glancing between the two of you and then looking back toward the front door, as though she was expecting the enchantments to suddenly begin wailing to alert her to a couple of underage wizards in the pub. Even though the two of you had successfully made it all the way over to the bar without that happening. 

“Young?” Fred scoffed, putting on his very best tone of fake offence. “Honestly, woman, why would a couple of kids be in a pub at three in the morning?” 

Rosmerta raised a brow at him, making it clear that she didn’t buy this - at least not yet. 

Your stomach curled with nerves, and you tried your hardest not to show it on your face. You knew that this would either end in a spectacular punishment, or Fred would pull off one of his greatest hoaxes yet. 

“Perhaps you might recognize us from when we were Hogwarts students,” Fred shrugged, trying his best to sound casual. “But we graduated year before last. And we just got off a very long shift with the Department of Cursed Objects, and we would simply like a drink.” 

“Yeah, that last one was a doozy.” Your tongue moved before you gave it permission, and you found yourself leaning on the bar as you added onto Fred’s lie. “We had to hunt down this set of silver teaware that poisoned anyone who drank out of it. They were spitting up blood, and rotting from the inside out, choking on their own-” 

“My apologies.” Rosmerta said, giving a curt smile. Clearly, she was increasingly uncomfortable with the graphic nature of your made-up story, and simply wanted you and Fred out of her way. “You must be right. The students from the school all start to blend together after the years. How ‘bout that drink then?” 

She turned to grab a pair of non-cursed glasses, and when you glanced over at Fred, he was grinning widely at you. 

“Good one.” He whispered into your ear, and you couldn’t help the shiver that went through you at the feeling of his hot breath on your neck. If asked, you would say that it was caused by the chill of someone opening the door, and not caused by your unbearable attraction to him. 

When the drinks were placed on the bar in front of you, Rosmerta scurried off to attend to someone else. You picked up the glass that was half filled with the amber liquid, feeling intense victory and satisfaction flowing through you. In a predictable pattern, you and Fred gently clinked your glasses together. 

But rather than making a congratulatory toast in celebration of getting away with the lies, you grinned widely at him as you said this: 

“You’re a menace to society, Fred Weasley.” 

“You love it.” He replied easily, giving you a cheeky wink as he tossed back the liquid in one clean gulp. He winced slightly and sucked in a breath sharply through his teeth. But it was clearly not his first time drinking, and you had to guess that Bill was the one responsible for that. 

Wanting to match him, you did the same - you tipped the glass back, letting all of the liquid slide past your lips and down your throat in one go. It burnt sharply in a way that you absolutely weren’t expecting, and you began coughing and sputtering, giving away your amateur nature in one glance. It was lucky that Rosmerta wasn’t looking. Fred rubbed your back soothingly, though he did take a moment to laugh at you. 

“Burns, doesn’t it?” He chuckled. 

“You c-could’ve warned me.” 

… 

A short while later, the burn of the alcohol was certainly no longer a concern for you. You supposed that was part of the point - if booze made you drunk and detached from yourself, they didn’t have to make it taste good. Because after a while, you just didn’t taste it. 

You and Fred were three rounds deep, and even though he was matching you drink for drink, he was far more composed than you were. He hardly seemed drunk at all, other than the cute way he giggled at your jokes. Perhaps it was because of his height, or his Quidditch playing muscles, but he was handling his alcohol surprisingly well. 

You, on the other hand - you were properly sloshed. 

You had shed most of your winter clothing and spread the pieces haphazardly around the table that Fred had sat the two of you at. And you were currently trying to balance one of the empty shot glasses on your forehead - just to prove that you could, while Fred watched on in amusement. 

Of course, he was partially amused by your drunken antics, and partially watching your cleavage threaten to burst out of your tight, V neck tee shirt as you arched your back furiously, trying to keep the glass balanced there. Since you had shed off your jacket and thick jumper, this was what you were left in, along with your tight jeans and boots - and Fred found that he couldn’t keep his eyes off you. 

“See! Told you I could do it!” You cheered, proud of yourself as you finally reached up and took the glass down, and then moved back to sit in your chair in front of Fred. 

He couldn’t help but to smile at you. Honestly, he would never doubt you in anything you set your mind to. If you said that you could walk up walls or make Snape dance a jig, he would simply wait to watch it happen. 

As he watched your proud smile and the way that the slightly drunken confidence caused you to sit up a bit taller, seeing the light from the fireplace gently kiss your skin - he was reminded of why he had brought you here in the first place. He let the alcohol in his own system give him courage (something that had been built into the plan) and he reached across the table, grabbing your hand gently with both of his. 

The suddenly serious look that befell Fred’s face surprised you. That sense of surprise only grew when he took hold of your hand. He had more than captured your attention as he began to speak. 

“Y/N, there’s something I really need to tell you.” Fred announced, his voice taking on a very rare serious quality. 

It was something you had only heard from him when he talked about the possible ways to fund his joke shop or when you had fallen off a broom playing Quidditch at the Burrow and he had been worried about you being hurt. You nodded, stunned into silence, wondering if this meant bad news coming, eager for him to continue. 

“Y/N, darling, you truly are the most amazing thing in my life.” He said, giving a small smile. Hearing this made your stomach tingle - it made the clasp of his hands around yours feel warmer. “You are so utterly brilliant. And you’re funny, and you’re the only girl I know who actually laughs at the stupid pranks I pull. I absolutely love spending time with you. I genuinely can’t imagine my life without you. So much so, that-” 

“Hello, sweet thing.” 

Fred’s words were disrupted by a deep voice, someone behind you who grumbled out these words and then let out a low whistle. 

It took you a moment to realise that it was even directed at you. But when Fred’s face switched from that sweet smile to a harsh glare - a look that was rare for him, you followed his intense gaze over your shoulder to see what he was looking at. 

It was a group of three men, much older than you, greasy-haired, wearing dark cloaks - staring at you like a pack of coyotes would stare at a hunk of fresh meat. Their gaze immediately made you feel naked, and though you were blazen hot, between the Fire Whiskey coursing through your system and the heat of the fireplace licking at you nearby, you had the urge to grab your jumper and pull it on over your head simply so that they would stop looking. 

“Now what is a pretty thing like you doing in this dirty old pub?” One of the men asked, his voice feeling filthy in your ears and causing your spine to curl with disgust and something that you would hesitate to admit was fear. “Surely you must be lost, sweet thing. Need someone to show you the way home, then?” 

You quickly jumped out of your chair and moved around the table to Fred’s side, where he had risen and easily swept you into his side with an arm around your shoulders. In a moment, you felt safer under his protective touch as he continued to glare at the men. 

“Bugger off, then!” Fred ordered sharply. 

“Oh, ‘bugger off’,” One of the others mocked Fred’s words in a whiny tone - clearly they didn’t take him seriously because he was obviously younger, even if he was quite tall for his age. 

“What are you, her little boyfriend?” Another one of them joked. 

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I am.” Fred stated confidently, tossing in the obvious lie. “And I can tell you that brushing your teeth is one of the first requirements to getting a woman of this calibre,” 

You resisted the urge to laugh at how his statement made their faces immediately meek and embarrassed. 

“Well, if she wants a real man, that’s up to her to decide.” The man said gruffly. “Innit, princess?” 

When he tossed out the nickname, you felt bile curl in your stomach, and it took you only a second to move when Fred uttered his next words to you. 

“Grab your coat. We’re leaving.” 

You scrambled around the table to get your jumper, mittens, hat, scarf, and your coat. As you were reaching across to one of the chairs to grab the last item, one of the men actually had the audacity to grab your wrist, stopping you from pulling back with the item in hand. 

“If the girl wants to stay and have fun, that’s her choice.” He grumbled. 

You wanted to tout that no, your idea of fun wasn’t hanging around men like this, but your voice was shrunken down into your throat with fear. 

His grip around you was stiff and painful, and you immediately looked to Fred - whose jaw was set with a seething anger that you had only seen in him once before (when Malfoy had dared to insult Ginny right in front of him). He reached one hand into his pocket and leaned on the table with the other hand. 

The man still didn’t let go of you, and you wondered if Fred’s hand was sitting on his wand in his pocket. 

“Listen, bud, I don’t speak troll, so I’ll say this very slowly for you,” Fred announced, his voice dark with anger. “Let. Her. Go.” 

The man immediately became outraged at being called a troll, and he moved his hand off your wrist, curling it into a hefty fist that he moved to swing at Fred’s head. 

Fred ducked out of the way seamlessly, and you pulled your coat into the pile of clothes at your chest as Fred’s hand came out of his pocket with a lump of something black that looked almost like ordinary coal. He tossed it down to the floor and it exploded into a cloud of pure, thick darkness. Before you could truly comprehend what was going on, Fred’s comforting arm was around your shoulders, guiding you back out the back door of the pub. 

You were thankful to be surrounded by cool air, the anxiety unwinding around you as Fred guided you away from the scene. 

“Freddie, that was amazing!” You gasped, more than happy to praise him for saving you from those creeps. 

You trudged along through the snow, incredibly chilly now that the wind kissed your bare arms and you held your jumper and your jacket rather than wearing them. But you were distracted from that feeling as you stared at the pub. You heard muffled coughs and voices loudly complaining, and as you circled around to the front, you saw the dark smoke overtaking any light that was inside, so much so that it began to pour out from the chimney and leak out of the cracks around the front door. 

“What was that?” You had to ask, looking on in pure curiosity of the concoction that he had released into the pub. 

“...new product George and I have been working on,” Fred admitted, his voice quivering with nerves slightly as he heard the coughs and sputters from inside. “Should probably adjust the size of the pellets, though. That was a bit… much.” 

“Everything about you is ‘much’, Fred.” You said, still feeling that beautiful drunken warmth. It morphed into pure admiration toward him that you could hardly hold back. “That’s what makes you great.” 

Fred chuckled at this. 

He helped you get dressed back in your warm clothes, and the two of you walked back to the castle through that secret tunnel once again. He never quite built up the courage to get back to that topic he had so badly wanted to discuss - the entire reason he had taken you to Hogsmeade in the first place. But he basked in the simple joys of the night as the two of you talked in the Gryffindor common room and eventually, you fell asleep cuddled up to his chest while lounging on a couch in front of the fire. 

… 

Now, all these years later, curled up on the couch with him much like you had been that night - you finally realised what he had been trying to say. 

“Oh my god.” You gasped quietly, opening your eyes and sitting stark upright. 

Fred was surprised by this, seeing as he thought that you were starting to fall asleep on his chest. He had been sitting there quietly, mentally debating if he should levitate you to bed or risk the neck cramps of sleeping upright on the couch himself. 

“What?” He asked quietly, feeling entirely clueless. 

“Oh. My. God!” You screamed, jumping off the couch and pointing an accusatory finger at him. 

“What? What?!” He asked, the word growing in volume and sense of alarm in his mouth the longer you went without telling him what was wrong. 

“That day - that day-” You were struggling to gather your thoughts into words, a drunken slur still slightly evident on your tongue. Though the anxiety and panic that had suddenly set in had woken up quite a few of your senses.

“What? What day?” Fred parroted back, even more confused. 

“That day.” You repeated, pressing emphasis on the word. “That time, back in sixth year, when we snuck out to Hogsmeade.” 

A look of dawning came across Fred’s features, and he became more sullen than you had ever seen him. It was something that punched you sharply in the chest as the realisation hit you even harder now. 

You had been so stupid. How could you not have known it back then? 

“You… you were gonna confess your feelings to me.” You said quietly, almost afraid to speak the words aloud. 

Perhaps he could have saved himself some pain if he lied, but he saw no good sense in denying it. 

“Yes.” He said quietly, unshed tears scraping the inside of his throat. 

“What-?” Now it was your turn to gape with confusion. “Was that the only time? Why then?” 

“That certainly was not the only bloody time.” Fred chuckled, the laughter sounding heavy and dark in his throat rather than joyous and light as it usually did coming from him. “I tried about a million other times before then - at the Quidditch World Cup, before we ran into your cousins who just so desperately needed your attention. On the train that year, before Katie burst in and stole you away to chat on about what a great summer you had. I thought perhaps you’d get the bloody point when I asked you to be my date to the Yule Ball.” 

It felt as though an icy shard was shoved right through your heart. 

You had been so stupid. 

“I - I thought you asked me to go as friends.” You told him, entirely honest about your viewpoint. 

“Well that just makes me feel like the biggest arse in existence.” Fred shrugged. 

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” You barked out, feeling an intense frustration rush over you. 

You felt indignant, annoyed. You felt like something had been stolen from you - information, time that you should have spent with Fred as your boyfriend rather than the time you had spent simply wishing he was. 

Fred scoffed at this, clearly hurt. 

“Well, Y/N, at a certain point, I lost my balls!” He shouted back. That was a harsh thing to imagine - Fred Weasley losing the courage to take a risk. “I thought that after all the damn interruptions, the universe just didn’t want you to know that I’m hopeless bleedin’ in love with you.” 

Your throat clenched up when he said it in the present tense - said like he still had those feelings for you. You wanted so badly to say it back, but your voice was caught in your throat for a harsh moment. It caused a pitiable silence over the room that made him rush to continue.

“Honestly, I thought - I thought it might be different after you left.” 

He said quietly, his voice breaking around the words slightly. 

“I thought that not seeing you every day… that I might be able to forget how I felt. But it only got worse. I thought about you every single day, and I missed you so badly. And now that you’re standing here in front of me - now, you’re not just some girl I fancied in school, now… you have turned into this magnificent woman that I love. And it would be my biggest regret if you didn’t know that.” 

Fred confessed, his words so passionate that it caused tingles down your spine, and goosebumps across your arms. 

“But you’re probably so drunk that you won’t remember this in the morning, and there’s probably some French arsehole named Pierre waiting for you-” 

“There’s no one else.” You quickly blurted out, suddenly finding your voice. 

Your body finally caught up to your mind, bursting with the urge for him to know this. 

“It’s always been you, Fred Weasley.” You announced, your words slicing through the air like a diamond cutting through glass. 

His eyes lit up and this, and he stared at you with the slightest bit of hope dancing across his features as he waited, holding his breath for you to possibly confirm the thing he had been dreaming about for years. 

“And I certainly won’t forget this. No booze or potion - nothing could make me forget you saying the words I have always wanted to hear.” 

You reached out and took a tight grip on the front of his shirt, pulling him toward you with force - you slammed your lips into his, finally doing the thing you had been dreaming of since you were a teenager. He let out a moan as you kissed him with as much intense passion as he had put into his words. Right as his tongue snaked toward your lips, you pulled back for a breath, and simply for good measure: 

“I love you, Fred.” You breathed out. 

“Oh, thank Merlin.”

#sundrop writes #harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fandom #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley #fred weasly x reader #fred weasely x y/n #fred wealsey fic

[theflyindutchwoman]

So, did you have something you were gonna ask me? I can't remember. Don't make me hurt you. Do you want to go out on a date? Yeah. I do.

| ANATOMY OF A SCENE - CHENFORD EDITION 5.09 - Take Back

There is something deeply romantic, dreamy even, in the way this scene is directed… The dimmed lights, the heart eyes, the hushed tones… All of this just give off this very intimate feel… this mysterious and exciting ambiance.

Now add the imagery of Tim playing with a piece of glass from the scuffle, examining it like it's a diamond or something equally precious... Of Lucy saying 'I do'… Bookending this scene with these two moments is certainly bold, but it does paint a clear picture of their level of commitment. There's also the ever present motif of the door : the one left, literally and metaphorically, open by Chris' departure... and the one in Tim's office, left open as well, for Lucy to come in. Not to mention the symbolism of them starting this new journey together in their Watch Commander's office. A not so subtle reminder of the last obstacle standing between them : having Tim and Lucy take that step there definitely underlines how they don't plan on letting the chain of command tear them apart. As it is, the fact that Lucy barely waited after breaking up with Chris to come back to the station and talk to Tim, dispels any doubt that she might have had second thoughts, like he was worried at first. Like he still worries when she shows up, a bit hesitant before walking in… or when she mentions Chris… But it doesn't last long.

And then, add the body language, the movement of the scene. Like how Tim and Lucy mirror each other flawlessly, emphasising how they are both on the same page… Or how they stand on opposite sides of the office, gradually coming together. First with Lucy, entering the office slowly. Then Tim, getting up to meet her halfway. There's still a gap between them though, and it coincides with their discussion about Chris. By this point, they're facing each other, hands clasped in front of them, a gesture made to appear more confident while feeling vulnerable : they know what this means now that they're both single… It's as scary as it is exciting. They just need to take one last step. Literally and figuratively.

That's when the atmosphere turns really electric… And Lucy being the one to take the leap this time, looking around to make sure no one is paying attention to them, subtly telling Tim she is ready, is perfect. Her bedroom eyes when she invites him to ask her out again… She exudes so much sensuality here. His look of surprise is endearing, as if he can't believe her forwardness to do this at work, in their boss' office, where anybody could see them or walk in. As if he can't believe they're finally there… The way he has to rile her up, something he loves doing, by pretending he doesn't know what she means… Or how she simply threatens to hurt him, introducing a new love language for them in the process - and taking a page from his own playbook, when he used to threaten her as a rookie… This is the perfect combination of old and new… A subtle way to illustrate how some things never change… And some do. How their dynamic will remain mostly unchanged.

They are both so excited to start this new relationship. Her smile… The intense look on his face… The longing, even more apparent than when he was about to come in her apartment… Walking slowly towards her, maintaining eye contact, and taking that final step - literally - to join her… Properly asking her out on a date this time, not just have dinner, looking all smitten… Her smile and twinkle in her eyes… 'I do'… They're beaming and glowing and ecstatic… And it's such a good look on them. This is both soft and sizzling at the same time. That final shot of them looking happily at each other, their position still mirroring the other, without a care in the world on who might be watching, is gorgeous. They're just enthralled, spellbound… And this time, there's no interruption, they get to have this moment just for them. To bask in it. As they deserve. As we deserve.

#the rookie #chenford #chenfordedit #lucy chen #tim bradford #5.09 #Anatomy of a scene - Chenford Edition

[mister-eames]

im in SHAMBLES cause i always knew that the original security is gonna run you down line was between Arthur and Dom but was given to A/E later but only now I got to know that it was not “be back before the kick” in the original script but actually “be back in time for the kick” from Dom!! Be back in in time for the kick is not asking to be safe it’s actually a command or a direction; and it’s further cemented by Arthur’s reply in script; it’s “I’m on it” .. it matches their dynamic from the beginning, professional with cobb sort of calling the shots. But when mr Nolan gave it to A/E he had to change it?? Cause it doesn’t match this married couple??? So he made it be back BEFORE the kick with a thinly veiled “ BE SAFE BABE”???? And GO TO SLEEP MR EAMES ?? Meaning don’t worry about me darling I’ll be there???!!!!!! My head hurts??????

It still blows my mind how it was originally Arthur and Cobb having this moment in the script and Nolan, presumably like us, was captivated by the chemistry and quiet story of Arthur and Eames, and changed the characters around! It's a perfect bookend to their snarky beginnings, to the shot of them planning the job, you know the one, where it focuses on Arthur and Eames for "...we all yearn for reconciliation..." to this exchange. Nolan knew it was necessary, in case the audience was wondering, Arthur and Eames got their reconciliation. That we got to see them full circle.

Because the way it was scripted with Cobb was between friends/comrades. Arthur reaffirming to Cobb he can be trusted, that he's got his back despite what occurred and was revealed the level above. Lovely. But so much about Cobb and Arthur's friendship is not said in so many words. It really wasn't necessary. It didn't lend any sort of closure to the characters journey's to have this scene play out, it just didn't make sense.

The fact that the script had to change along with their characters so that Arthur and Eames could flirt and smile at each other and 'be back before the kick', and 'uh-huh go to sleep' like COME ON. It's the contrast from all their other scenes - the banter and teasing, Eames laughing at Arthur's kick tests - this scene was so gentle, so soft and so quiet. In the same way Eames didn't need to help Arthur with the projections in level one, Arthur did not have to help Eames with his cannula. He didn't need to flick Eames fingers away and help him above anyone else. Arthur very much chose to help out so they could have these sweet nothings this quiet talk.

Every time someone tries to reduce Arthur/Eames down to 'darling' I feel like the Will Smith meme pointing at all the rest of it. Like, are we all not seeing this?? It kills me. This scene kills me -- it's so important to their relationship and themselves as individual characters,

#every fic that has arthur and eames leaving LAX together is correct #these two make me sick they're so sweet #arthur x eames #inception #not to say that 'darling' isn't important it is #but their subtext is what makes the ship

[sonkitty]

Bookend Buddies - Crowley and Muriel

Introduction

Alright, I'm going to talk about Crowley and Muriel.

My starting theory was that these two knew each other as at least acquaintances, not necessarily friends, in the first draft of the story. This first draft would have resolved the matter of the cardboard box Gabriel brought much sooner. Then a second draft, or even more drafts, act as the cover for whatever happened the first time around.

After looking over Crowley and Muriel scenes, something like that could indeed be true, but certain other messages from the story emerged that seem to make that idea secondary when looking at the pair specifically together.

Trust

For one, a far understated thing about their relationship is that these two trust each other, even if they don't seem to know each other very well. It hits really hard once you get the level of trust Crowley has to have in Muriel for their assistance in the Triple of The Bigger Thresholds Trick. Their part together is for the Heaven elevator, and pockets are involved.

Pocket usage combined with threshold usage in Good Omens 2 amounts to a nightmarish puzzle that I will never truly solve. I have solved just enough to know what to look for, and I see it all over their entry into Heaven. Pockets require precise framing, and they both have it.

This trust level would put their relationship as much more likely to be actual friends despite Crowley's intense claim to the contrary in episode 5 when he tells Gabriel that Aziraphale is the only friend he has.

Bookends

The other weird message was something I found in looking for a small pattern I noticed. That pattern was that Crowley scenes tend to bookend Muriel scenes. I started to log and verify that pattern. It's not on both ends every time, and I could find only one Muriel scene where there's no bookend of a scene with him on either side.

When they both get back from Heaven in episode 6, this pattern goes into hyper-drive. It becomes a game in and of itself to see how Crowley can bookend or share Muriel scenes all the way up to the end of the episode and overall season.

Along the way, Muriel likely assists Crowley in the Single of The Pocket Trick. Muriel then ends up having bookend scenes to all 6 of Crowley's own Threshold Tricks.

Memory

I don't know how both their memories were edited or altered, but I'm left to guess that it happened and was partly voluntary with making sure they remembered just enough to maintain their trust in each other or have a way for that trust to quietly activate, as if it has a switch.

Boxes

Boxes are a theme with these two, so I'm going to discuss the boxes among the other stuff below.

...

Episode 1: The Arrival

There are 3 Matchbox Muriel scenes. Two of them happen in episode 1.

Before Muriel is shown on screen, there is a cut of Gabriel with the fly that's implied to be an extension of the scene where Aziraphale called Crowley to invite Crowley to the coffee shop.

Then Muriel finds the matchbox. I'm not going to get too much into the quote and stuff, but one could easily link it to Crowley if what I've read of its relation to "leviathan" is true since leviathans can be associated with snakes. There's also the fire-breathing Crowley pretending to be Aziraphale in season 1. Then of course that hopping and shouting with the lightning forcing the power outage on the coffee shop that comes later. The matchbox itself might be evil or borderline evil.

Muriel's hand is just as deliberate as Crowley's can be when it comes to managing the touch because part of a thumb is shown with the thumb tip itself hidden and the thumb obscured specifically by the end of the touch.

After this scene, the immediate next scene is Crowley's arrival at the coffee shop, which is also The Perfect Entrance Trick.

So, that's one Muriel scene book-ended with Crowley scenes. One could find the first part debatable, and indeed, that will happen again. Still, almost every time, there will be a Crowley scene at least before or after a Muriel scene.

That's also the first scene for Muriel to bookend one of the Threshold Tricks.

Take note.

These things add up.

We're going to take a quick break from Muriel because of the cardboard box.

In episode 1, there is an extremely important sequence of at least one Likely Fake Crowley, possibly two, storming out of the bookshop. In that sequence, the fake who looks most likely to be Aziraphale passes by a prominently displayed cardboard box and does not touch it.

Actual Crowley is a top tier player in Earthly Objects who is incredibly deliberate in what he touches, especially with his hands. He's also someone who tends to ask questions.

Remember the cardboard box and that the fake did not touch that box and did not question it. Both Crowley and Muriel are going to follow this pattern with the exception of Crowley retrieving the box during episode 6 of course.

Let's get back to Muriel.

The next debatable front bookend Crowley scene to a Muriel scene is that after Crowley shoots out lightning, his torso is shown and does not include his head. The scene cuts to Nina and Maggie realizing they are locked in. For some reason, a blurry red-headed figure wearing black is ensured to be shown in the background as if it could be Crowley. This figure is a possible fake because we later find out that Crowley lost so much of his red in his hair. Plus, there's some general confusion about the car being parked in front of the coffee shop. The car itself seems more bluish. He doesn't enter or leave and is shown to be with the car later on a different street. This possible fake allows for a stronger bookend connection to the incoming Muriel scene nonetheless.

The next cut is of Michael and Uriel for a bit before Muriel enters, but it is the same scene. Now we are at Matchbox Muriel Scene #2.

When the matchbox is set down, it does not make the sound that an empty matchbox makes. In fact, it sounds like a disguised magical book. The music gives more of a mystery vibe than a stronger intensity and possibly evil vibe it will give later in episode 5.

We learn the name of the game, Earthly Objects, and are shown an extensive touching sequence. I don't know if it's a tutorial. If it is, I can't tell you what it teaches. I can mainly tell you it makes sure to show most of Michael's digits during the sequence. Thumbs are shown, but the thumbs don't actually touch the matchbox itself. Thumbs are a big deal in Earthly Objects. A thumb tip can even set certain things into Door Mode. If that matchbox is an evil book hiding in disguise, a thumb tip could be like a password that would have accessed it. Muriel avoided doing that or avoided it in just the right way.

As this Muriel scene wraps up, Uriel says, "I think he's gone to Earth."

We're supposed to guess and assume they mean Gabriel, yet the story cuts to Crowley entering his car before he is summoned to Hell. So, this Muriel scene is given a clear back bookend Crowley scene.

Muriel does not show up again in episode 1.

But...let's get back to the cardboard box.

When Crowley returns to the bookshop, the prominently displayed cardboard box is no longer prominently displayed where it was. In fact, for a good long while, I thought it had disappeared as much as the plate of Eccles cakes, but no, it was just moved out of the way in a less obvious spot.

Now, here's something I found interesting while drafting this post. My own question to myself was, "Was the box moved out of Crowley's line of sight?" for the scene.

I was quite surprised to find out that in almost the entire scene, the box is not in his line of sight. There is only one tiny part of the scene where it is.

The box is in Crowley's line of sight briefly during the apology dance.

So, the dance might have been a clue to Crowley to know where the box was but still not visibly touch it or question it. Remember, later in episode 6, it's going to be weird when he acts like he knows about the cardboard box he never acknowledged in the whole story up to that point.

...

Episode 2: The Clue

Not that it's hard being one of the two main characters of the story, but Crowley has another front bookend scene before a Muriel scene in the minisode that starts off the episode. He is at least prevented from having a back bookend scene this time.

The episode opens with the scene of the big giant scroll and pretending to kill off the goats while actually turning them into crows instead, as Crawley.

Muriel is later shown reading a big giant scroll. I don't know if it's the exact same scroll, but it's at least supposed to be about the same thing.

Muriel does not appear again for the rest of the episode.

...

Episode 3: I Know Where I'm Going

At long last, Muriel arrives on Earth. They have a scene without Crowley scenes book-ending either side of it.

The front bookend is Gabriel drinking hot chocolate. Soon after, Muriel is the subject being seen through the window for Mrs. Sandwich. Then they start their scene with Aziraphale. One could probably estimate this scene's end as Aziraphale closing the door. So, finally, no Crowley though Crowley himself will be part of the scene immediately after.

It's possible that Muriel has had a memory wipe though how recent is hard to guess. My own guess would be that it's actually relatively recent because as stated, I think they and Crowley knew each other in the first draft of the story.

Aziraphale seems to have a moment of quiet recognition, that could be either from the recent Job minisode or if he knew Muriel in the first draft as well. I would guess that he did, but this bookend thing Crowley and Muriel have is not quite the same as what can be found between Aziraphale and Muriel. Aziraphale moves the story along without any further acknowledgment.

After Muriel enters, the cardboard box is given more focus from its designated place than usual with a blurred Muriel in the foreground. The camera work forces a shift such that Muriel receives focus, and the cardboard box is blurred. While I'm sure many people have picked up on this thing happening, I'm going to add that that particular type of blur was used in the first shared complex window scene Maggie and Nina had looking at Crowley through a window in episode 1. The blur type share was also done with Crowley and Gabriel in episode 1 when Crowley finds out Gabriel is in the bookshop. So, Muriel is given a notable share with a cardboard box instead of an actual full other character in the story. It's also a box that keeps having no touching or questioning from Crowley. Muriel doesn't touch it or question it either.

When Crowley arrives, he does sound grumpy as he complains about Aziraphale not taking the train. He soon stops, realizes Muriel is there, and says, "Who's this now?"

Take note of the "now" because this story is both deceptive and deliberate in its methods. These are the types of little clues it scatters around compared to the bigger ones. The "now" hints he knows of a "who" Muriel was from some other time.

Just as Muriel glows, Crowley is actually more cast in shadow than he already often is upon stopping to find them there. His body makes sure to stop with the shadow covering much of his upper body area in a diagonal manner.

Crowley has short sideburns despite Muriel being an angel because the bookshop literally took their claim as human. Interestingly, Crowley is also lacking his more saturated streak of red hair that is often found over the center of his left eye during the present day story.

Crowley himself quickly warms up to Muriel in a more friendly manner.

Muriel's body blocks the cardboard box from our line of sight for a good amount of the scene but not the entire time. In turn, Crowley is bound to have it in his own line of sight much more easily than in episode 1 when he returned to the bookshop. So, by now, Crowley probably knows it's there and is still just generally ignoring it while being near its presence.

There's some kind of light near Muriel that keeps flickering. While neither Crowley nor Muriel use pockets here, they both do at other times. Pockets use lighting as clues. So, I'm not going to log every single line and every single flicker, but I did notice the flicker when Muriel said "200 years". That number could mean something like when these two actually met or became friends.

Another noteworthy thing about this scene involving both characters is that it is one of the few times the story shows a person reflected in Crowley's sunglasses before The Window Trick at the end of episode 6. Muriel's reflection can actually be found, quite likely because they were intentionally showing off their cup of tea.

Crowley exits first, allowing for a scene between Muriel and Aziraphale. After Aziraphale leaves, Muriel is left alone momentarily. While they do not get the same blurred share from earlier, they are still shown specifically with the cardboard box while not touching it or questioning it.

Later, Muriel intrudes on Crowley and Aziraphale. I've actually written about the scene in my "Rule Following" section for Earthly Objects.

So, I'll mainly say that this scene does not really have a hint of them having known each other. Instead, it has Crowley manipulating the scene and Muriel to do what he wants so he can give Aziraphale a proper pass of the car keys. The toss is incredibly precise because he waits until Muriel's eyes move to the notepad, not just for them to get out their notepad. The only possible hint is if Muriel actually looked at Crowley before their notepad intentionally as a cue for when he should be ready for the toss. Then the toss isn't as impressive, so my bias prefers to think that was not the case. Head canon as you please.

Even though the two had an actual scene together, the story makes that scene a front bookend Crowley scene of yet another Muriel scene with Muriel's stop at the coffee shop.

Muriel is not seen again for the rest of the episode.

...

Episode 4 does not have Muriel. It does have Crowley touching the cardboard box of the plants. Sorry, I couldn't help notice that cardboard boxes are a thing because of the matchbox and the mainly featured cardboard box, so we may as well take note since Muriel was given that shared blur with such an important cardboard box.

...

Episode 5: The Ball

During episode 5, there are two important scenes shared between Crowley and Gabriel. The first scene is where Crowley ultimately tells Gabriel to jump out a window, then stops Gabriel from doing so. He offers to make hot chocolate. This scene is a front bookend of the last Matchbox Muriel scene. It also includes mention of an actual matchbox.

Finally, we are back to our ominous borderline evil matchbox itself with Matchbox Muriel Scene #3. This scene further manages to act as a back bookend to a touch of The Sunglasses Trick. In this matchbox scene, the subtitles say "intense music" and it is intense. The matchbox is given immediate focus to introduce the scene.

The intensity settles. Muriel is giving their report to Michael and Uriel with no Saraqael around.

In this report, Muriel says Crowley's name, including calling him, "Mr. Crowley," and describes Crowley as Aziraphale's "grumpy friend." Well, Crowley was grumpy when Muriel first saw him yes, but most of the time we saw them together, he was not grumpy. In fact, he was rather friendly. Muriel is also shown to be unaware that Crowley is a demon. When they say Aziraphale's "Mr. Fell" name, Uriel gives Muriel a look that makes Muriel definitely not say Crowley's name—not even partially.

Aside from Aziraphale, Shax, and any character involved in the 1941 minisode, the story itself seems to have some rather strict rules on who can say Crowley's name and when. If I remember right, Muriel never says Crowley's name again.

We, the audience, were never shown anyone giving Muriel Crowley's name before that point either. In addition to that, mysterious music plays while the angels stop in confusion as they grasp at the assistant bookseller they can't quite remember. The matchbox is not easily seen during all of this time, but we know we saw it first with the intense music.

We never saw Muriel see or speak to an assistant bookseller, Gabriel going by Jim, in the scenes given. Muriel's memory and the story's memory do not match with what we have been told is happening. And some possibly evil matchbox is making that happen...maybe. That thing gives off "trying to get back to its master" evil ring vibes towards Crowley. It's creepy. No, I'm not venturing too far down that road. I'm admitting it's just vibes.

The back bookend scene here is Crowley actually giving Gabriel hot chocolate.

After this point, Crowley's sideburns stay a medium-to-long length until right before the credits at the end. Part of my sideburns scheme theory is that Aziraphale and Crowley borrowed each other's homes to form a special connection that affected an invisible supernatural border that existed between the car and the bookshop. They then made their preparations for the ball through the invitations, and Crowley had his scenes with Gabriel to force this sideburn status into place.

That means a lot of pieces were moved around so that the next time Crowley encountered Muriel, his sideburns were longer despite Muriel's earlier claim of being "human" and the bookshop's reading from that.

Let's skip ahead to that Crowley and Muriel encounter.

Crowley finds Muriel near the pub. In fact, he finds Muriel at, I believe, where he parked the car in episode 2. That's quite the coincidence.

After he convinces Muriel to "arrest" him, for some reason, Crowley makes sure to enter the elevator first. Ever since I realized Crowley's sideburns respond to thresholds, I have taken note of Crowley's deliberate decisions in so much of what he does, especially in season 2. He is rather strategic overall. Him entering first sets off alarms in my head. That is not the typical way he does things. He goes alone or Aziraphale leads. In the Edinburgh minisode, Elspeth entered first, followed by Crowley, then Aziraphale. Not long before this Muriel encounter and probably not a coincidence, Crowley left with Mrs. Sandwich first. They went together. He still did not go first as only himself.

But for some reason, at this particular threshold, it is a priority that he be first. I wish I knew why instead of just constantly sensing it.

This entry into Heaven is the first part of the Triple in The Bigger Thresholds Trick. It is also the only one that expands over two episodes.

When looking at Crowley and Muriel together, here are some things I think are worth noting.

First of all, Muriel was convinced to begin with. Why would they trust him? He's a demon, and they were even given a specific look of not even saying his name. Yet still, they find Crowley convincing enough to do this arrest. Crowley told Shax in episode 2 that he was a "former demon," but when it comes to Muriel, he actually drops the "former" part of his own self-description.

Now, I do have this theory that when it comes to the longer sideburns, they are like a mark of rank on Crowley when he is around angels. I usually associate that theory more with their longest length and specifically when in the bookshop. If that theory has any merit even outside the bookshop, then latent memory in Muriel could actually be recognizing Crowley's rank from before his fall and why they ultimately abide. If I'm wrong, then Muriel still finds a way to put their trust in him, such as a latent memory of whatever they did together in the first draft of the story or past friendship they had. If there is no latent memory, Muriel just trusts him anyway.

Crowley himself is having to trust Muriel here. It is no small amount of trust either. This segment is incredibly important to performing the Trick. He trusted Aziraphale for the other two, and with Aziraphale not here, Muriel is the one he turns to for help.

Unfortunately, I do not have a desired simplified explanation of how this threshold is being tricked, but I can at least tell you I know what to look for and the deliberate methods both characters use for entering. The more simplified ways are that Crowley manages to not touch the buttons and not touch the pub doors before going up. Muriel is the one who both summons the elevator and closes the pub doors for him. When he is later seen going down, he maintains touch with his back at where the edges of the elevator doors meet.

Well, that's the easier stuff. There is something far more complicated happening with shadows, lighting, and pockets. I don't know what it is. I'm just going to tell you I see it, and I know it when I see it because I at least know what to look for. With pockets involved, that also means framing.

I won't bore you with too many of the details. It was hard to write in my initial draft. Muriel is deliberate in how they get themselves framed alongside Crowley. Probably about the most noteworthy things of such framing are a look down as if to check they are positioning themself properly and getting their right arm so close to being over the middle edge of where the elevator doors meet and still not doing that. That part might have to do with whatever was necessary a to align with a reflection in a window pane, and that reflection being over a lock.

Speaking of windows, they are both deliberately framed through the window panes. I'm not going to describe it. If you're interested and can see, I advise you just go take a look. It is assuredly intentional. Their heads and upper bodies are in a grid or something. "Gridlock" might be the simplified word I'm looking for, but I'm not fully convinced and couldn't explain it to anyone.

Here, I have at least made a GIF because the glance down helps show it's intentional:

Pockets of light were involved. Muriel used a pocket. Crowley made touches on his clothing suspiciously like when he uses pockets. His tied hands might have been tied. His belt head might have activated. It's ridiculous. I can't believe this Earthly Objects game.

Before Muriel entered, they looked at Crowley and asked, "You aren't trying to trick me, are you?"

Now a lot of people would see that question and be, like, yes, of course he is.

It definitely looks that way.

But...these two are actually tricking a threshold together. It is likely a clue to the audience to look for the Threshold Trick that's happening right in front of their eyes instead of Crowley tricking Muriel.

Even though we saw Muriel close the doors, we did not see any miracle touch to activate a button. We just see the elevator go up.

...

Episode 6: Every Day

As the two arrive in Heaven, Crowley makes sure to exit the elevator first. His foot decidedly makes sure to not touch the lower threshold of where the doors slid open. His shadow can be seen to his left side. When Muriel follows, they don't have a shadow to their left side at all.

Now on they go where probably a million important things happen since pockets were involved on the way up, but let's focus on three things.

Crowley quickly refers to Muriel's rank when asking about records. We've already seen Muriel know Crowley's name without us knowing how they got it. Now we see Crowley know Muriel's rank without us knowing how he got it. We're even going to see both of them receive each of these pieces of information later on this trip in Heaven.

Not long after the rank reference, one of the lines Crowley says is, "You're forgetting about the bees."

Crowley, how many times has Muriel helped you break into Heaven by this point?

I hope it's not more than one, but it's going to be awhile to get such an answer.

Muriel's "forgetting" are they? Does he know that Muriel knew about the bees before? Did they talk about it? Did they work together?

As the conversation continues, it leads to Crowley changing his appearance. Of note in this appearance, his newly manifested gold tie is...pocketed into his newly manifested gray jacket. If his "tied hands" activated at the entry, he's putting those hands in a pocket here and now. And he's doing that because Muriel led him to that decision.

Neither one seems to truly remember the other, but both are guiding each other to certain ends.

At some point, Crowley asks Muriel a question about if they knew why Gabriel would not want another Armageddon. They shake their head and answer "not yet". We were never actually shown Muriel's assignment for why they were on Earth. We were just led to believe it was to confirm the miracle that Aziraphale performed since all actions shown by the characters said so. Muriel has no problem admitting this "yet" part of their answer to Crowley.

Saraqael arrives and shows us one way Muriel could have gotten Crowley's name by addressing Crowley by name.

Later on is when Muriel actually gives the rank. Crowley gives them a friendly fist bump to the shoulder. They smile. Both of them are shown to be on friendly terms in what might be an earlier draft of the story. Even if it's not an earlier draft, I'm glad to see Crowley be on friendly terms with an angel who is not Aziraphale. He reached somewhat friendly terms with Gabriel, but the story made sure that Crowley and Gabriel had zero direct interaction on Gabriel's side once Gabriel recovered his memories. The same could be said of Muriel, now that I think about it.

There's footage of the cardboard box they both watch. Muriel's memory of the matchbox is shown in focus as an assumption it was whatever Gabriel really dropped.

On the exit to Heaven, I've long theorized that Crowley is invisible and Muriel looks scared and amazed by such a thing at the same time. I haven't really changed my mind. If Muriel is doing something to help because Muriel is in the middle on one side, and Crowley is in the middle on the other, I don't know what it is. I can just tell you that a pattern is indeed found between the two if one looks for such a thing.

I can also bring back the pockets.

When the light goes up and Crowley's appearance changes, something about his re-manifested clothes is decidedly different than usual. His tie strands are pocketed into his vest, which then means his thumbs and thumb joints are hidden. I don't know exactly what that means, but it's deliberate on the story's part. Thumbs do things to doors, and these thumbs are hiding themselves while Crowley has his back to a door. That's somehow doing whatever needs to be done for this Threshold Trick and Muriel convincing Crowley to change his appearance earlier contributed.

Also, there was a rainbow when the light went up.

We missed whatever led to Michael and Uriel joining Muriel, Saraqael, and Crowley in the elevator.

When Crowley and the angels arrive at the bookshop, Muriel quietly closes the doors without anyone asking. I'm left with the impression that those doors being opened when they were and while Crowley was in Heaven is supposed to be important. So, the timing of this closure and who is doing it is also important.

Muriel stays out of the way and on their own quite a bit throughout their time in the bookshop as they turn their attention to a book.

In turn, that means their attention is not on the cardboard box when it is retrieved to help Gabriel recover his memories.

When Gabriel recovers his memories, something strange happens. If Crowley is where the story told us he was—next to Aziraphale, Gabriel is acting like Crowley isn't there. Aziraphale glances where we were told Crowley was. Gabriel briefly follows this gaze, then changes course. In the next cut, he blinks as he passes over where Crowley would be. He names more characters, including Michael and Uriel. While he doesn't remember Saraqael's name, they are given an interaction. With Muriel on their own further back—just like Crowley—they, too, are ignored during this sequence. They are at least shown on screen. Eventually, Gabriel reacts to seeing Beelzebub, and we are informed that Crowley is still there by Aziraphale. Of course, with the scene cut the way it is, maybe he wasn't there, and all of these drafts are blending together but still telling us Crowley was ignored, possibly invisible, cloaked, or forgotten.

Even with Crowley visibly on screen as Beelzebub refers to Aziraphale by name, neither Gabriel nor Beelzebub acknowledge Crowley as having played any part in helping to look after Gabriel—or anything else for that matter.

Again, the cardboard box was notably ignored by Muriel. They were given a specific shared blur with the box. Why give the focus if nothing of fruition was to come from such a thing? That was a shared blur that Earthly Objects uses in its game, and that box went untouched.

Things move on with Crowley escorting Maggie and Nina out.

Now it really gets hard to track how Crowley is book-ending Muriel in the scenes at the end, but he is. I think he is doing it every time. He is shown to approach a window and look inside while several angels and demons are arguing. Aziraphale rings his bell, which is enough to grab Muriel's attention as well. Soon after, Crowley is shown looking through the window again and smiles.

Then they actually have a scene together where neither one of them talks. It is the Single in The Pocket Trick. The Pocket Trick is a difficult, confusing collection of puzzles that uses word play. Because Muriel wears all white and The Pocket Trick has a Rainbow Connection mechanic that uses non-rainbow shades, there is a very strong chance Muriel is helping Crowley with yet another Threshold Trick. Whatever it is, it probably has to do with the alignment of Crowley's sleeve and jacket through a window frame since that's when Muriel's white can be seen and then when Crowley's sunglasses appear in one of the window panes at a certain point since that's the exact frame where all-white-wearing Muriel is no longer on screen. Muriel's white probably held onto something the Trick needed during that part.

Muriel ends up bookend-ing both sides of the Single of the The Pocket Trick while also being in it. That means Muriel is pocketed into the last touch of The Pocket Trick.

From this point, I consider them both part of a much bigger scene between several characters that ends with the demons leaving. I also consider it the back bookend to that Pocket Trick Single.

The story cuts away to the Metatron and then back to another scene that Crowley and Muriel share with other characters. By the way, the angels and Crowley seem to have generally changed positions overall.

Eventually, everyone leaves, giving Crowley and Muriel a chance to have their own scene together.

Now Crowley is more grumpy. Even so, near the end of their scene, he throws a book at Muriel and says, "Go for it. Here, you'll like this one." How does Crowley know Muriel would like the book? Has he known that book to be liked by a past version of Muriel? Does he just generally know Muriel because they are either friends or decently acquainted even before this scene ever took place? Even if both answers are no, he is probably guiding Muriel to read that book. I have never read that book, The Crow Road, but I have read what other people analyzing Good Omens 2 have had to say about it. That book has characters who communicate in non-verbal code with each other.

That's something both Crowley and Aziraphale do frequently during Good Omens 2. Crowley is actually giving away how he and Aziraphale communicate to Muriel by choosing that book. That could be dangerous with someone he doesn't trust...but he trusts Muriel. He trusts Muriel so much he is trying to tell them something about himself without saying it out loud—or is reminding them.

The story moves on.

In the next Muriel scene, at first glance, it looks like Crowley does not get a front bookend scene with it. Instead, that's given to a mix of the Metatron and Aziraphale as Aziraphale walks away and enters the bookshop. Blended with that scene, Maggie and Nina leave the bookshop with Nina shown to be passing by the Metatron. If one goes back and looks very closely—and I definitely would have missed this part were it not for a Tumblr post I'm happening to remember, a small bit of Crowley can be found in the background when Maggie and Nina were leaving the bookshop.

Muriel has their scene with the Metatron about reading a book. This part allows Muriel's scene to be a front bookend to the last two touches of The Sunglasses Trick, which take place while Crowley and Aziraphale have their argument.

At the same time, Crowley's scene of those touches becomes the back bookend of another Muriel scene. This stuff is happening on purpose as a game from the story.

Crowley leaves. Sometime after, Muriel can be seen looking through the window with a big question of how much they saw of the argument. They saw enough to look sad—like someone who cares about Crowley as a friend would.

Muriel is barely part of the scene with the Metatron and Aziraphale yet still gets book-ended between Crowley scenes.

After that scene, Crowley is shown standing alone as he starts The Door Trick. So, again, we have Muriel acting as a front bookend to a Threshold Trick, and Crowley acting as a back bookend to a Muriel scene.

Muriel is not on screen during the entirety of The Door Trick, The Door Catch, and The Window Trick. They manage to stay out of the way during these important moments in the story even though, as best we can tell, they are somewhere nearby.

In Muriel's last scene, they still get book-ended by Crowley scenes. The Window Trick finishes. Muriel opens the door and enters the bookshop. That makes their scene a back bookend to the last Threshold Trick. Crowley's car is seen driving away. Before the credits start, Crowley is shown driving with short sideburns as the last scene of the season before the credits truly start to roll.

If I understand yet another pattern from this little game, starting from when I said this bookend thing went into hyper-drive, Crowley's supposed to be a front-and-back bookend to Muriel scenes whereas Muriel doesn't do that for as many of Crowley's scenes. They have a special pocket version for The Pocket Trick and a front-and-back bookend to the argument, which was the conclusion of The Sunglasses Trick. One could find Aziraphale's moment alone before the Metatron arrives as debatably its own scene, then Crowley just doesn't front-and-back bookend Muriel at that point. Otherwise, Muriel's supposed to bookend one side or the other of Crowley's scenes but not both.

I wasn't even looking for yet another game, but I found one.

Anyway, I think they're friends—good friends even. It's hard to say how long the friendship existed before season 2. This trust they share would also explain Muriel's last scene with Crowley trusting them to look after the bookshop as he leaves.

...

More here:

Bookend Buddies Part 2 - Crowley and Muriel

#good omens 2 #crowley #good omens #good omens s2 #david tennant #good omens season 2 #good omens analysis #good omens meta #good omens crowley #crowley good omens #muriel #quelin sepulveda

[oshiawaseni]

do y think at the end OFA'll disappear with AFO and Deku'll become a quirkless hero? (Maybe it could slowly fade, like All Might.) I hope that OFA disappears 'cause by the end of the manga the status quo of hero society MUST CHANGE and I believe that with All Might fighting AFO without quirk but with support items's the PERFECT setting to graft this change: ex n.1 hero who for years supported the strength of quirks, now becomes the symbol of the heroism that's born despite one's weaknesses.

You've pretty much got the answer yourself!

My thoughts are two options here: OFA disappears from Izuku, leaving him with just the stockpiling quirk that AFO gave Yoichi. It's an okay end, but it doesn't really slice through to the heart of the series like Izuku finishing the way he started does.

The difference being that Katsuki now loves him, and considers him his hero: quirk or no quirk. And this way Izuku, the symbol of the weak and different, is shown fully embraced by the symbol of quirk society: Katsuki.

I read that when mangaka hand in their first three names (like a draft) of their manga for consideration in being serialised, they also include the last page they would like the manga to end on... Hori knew how he wanted to end the manga, before it even started. And I’d like to think I know Hori's writing well enough to say he's the kind of writer who would bookend his story’s beginning and end with perfect contrast of each other. ESPECIALLY because BNHA started very bleak, and uplifting themes of dreams and hope and love are at the very core of this series.

So what do we see at the very beginning of BNHA? Katsuki bashing up Izuku when they were kids and Izuku noting the disparity between an individual’s value, of lives not being equal and the unfairness of it all that he was taught very early on because he was born lacking.

The way this will be inverted at the end will be with Katsuki and Izuku together - Izuku probably won’t have his quirk anymore - and we will get some kind of opposite to Katsuki’s “hate” and rejection of Izuku and his hurting him: Love. Acceptance. Warmth. Think chapter 322’s embrace, but even better. 💕

(And yes I think Hori will drive home the theme of their perfect teamwork together before the end. Probably in the final battle and then might have Izuku be a quirkless hero working together with Katsuki with the help of support items.)

Now that Izuku has dropped his ideal date “with a boyfriend,” I am pretty convinced the final scene will be bkdk’s crepe date, for Kohei to make it REALLY obvious to readers that they are now boyfriends, but even if it’s not this date specifically, I still think the final page will either be them holding hands or hugging each other. It’ll be a really loving final page, fully encapsulating Izuku’s journey of being somebody who was born different and thus rejected by quirk society (Katsuki), to somebody who is being loved and accepted by it (also Katsuki).

But I do think there will be a lot more emphasis on their personal relationship and romantic love for each other in general. Basically it is impossible to end this series in an open ended way that doesn’t appreciate their absolute love for each other, just as they are. 💕

It all started with bkdk, so it’ll end with bkdk. 😌 🧡💚

#asks #bakudeku #bkdk canon #sorry for the bit late response 😭 I got a bit side tracked #and anon I’ll answer you soon too ❤️ #livefreebutwisely

[luckydicekirby]

erin hasn’t read jade legacy yet and i have 700 pages worth of Opinions about it and you can’t put stuff under a cut in tweets so i am finally returning to “posting on tumblr”

this book did not fully work for me! and i am really chewing on why. I enjoyed reading it, and it made me cry several times, but it felt structurally disconnected and didn’t really come together for me like, Thematically. the ending was just kind of eh. points for ending on bero and the twice lucky, because i’m a simple woman i love a good bookend, but it feels really weird that the end was basically like “well, we won bc our family likes each other and the mountain all hates each other” guys your family is a nightmare!!!!!!!! 

on some level I think I had expectations the book ultimately wasn’t interested in fulfilling so I’m not a super fair judge--my called shot for this book was that niko was going to kill hilo for murdering his mom, or that at least that was going to be a major point of contention between them. at a certain point it became obvious this was not the direction we were going in, which is fine, but eyni’s murder was SUCH a great momentous “oh shit” moment in jade war and I feel like we never fully followed up on it--it makes perfect sense that hilo would see it as necessary and like it was the right thing to do, because he’s a freak and he sucks (affectionate), but we barely get to see niko react to it as an adult. like I really thought we were going to get a moment in jade legacy that was like, hey hilo, turns out you cannot just kill your nephew’s mom and kidnap him as a toddler without consequences, but I guess......you can? i feel like we missed out on sooo much meaty crunchy stuff in this vein.

also this should have been at least two or three books. I was excited about the time skips, because I wanted to see the kids as adults, but a lot of specific moments had to get skimmed over to fit everything in, and the kids kind of got the shaft as far as characterization--we get the most interesting character stuff with niko, and he barely has any POV! I liked what we got of Ru (and his death made me cry like a baby), but jaya was cool but completely flat. my mind palace ideal structure is like. one book still centered on the adults while the kids are growing up, and then one book centered on the adult kids where we actually get to dig deep into their character stuff/their relationships with each other. 

anyway, stray thoughts:

making anden and lott narrative foils but then not having them get together honestly kind of a power move. i kind of respect it. my read is that lott is gay but decided he would never be able to be out and be the horn, and stuck to that. which WOULD sure make him feel real weird about anden!

shae/ayt mada real and no one can convince me otherwise. they both tried to kill each other they both saved each other’s lives that is romance baybee

i did really enjoy the continuing bero throughline/his ultimate insignificance, and inability to even MAKE himself significant by confessing to lan’s murder to niko. that scene was so good. 

it feels like all the interesting thematic stuff in this book was coming together in the wake of Ru’s death, and then it all had to get dropped bc we were once again at like, “uh oh mountain’s gonna take over”. like no go back i want to talk more about senseless death and about how vital it is to die for a cause as a green bone but ultimately lan’s death was also a senseless accident and hilo HAS ALWAYS KNOWN THAT AND ALWAYS LIED ABOUT IT AND THAT’S THE ROOT CAUSE OF THE WAR!!! CAN WE TALK ABOUT THAT!!

2 black 2 green made me lose it. 

anyway i AM staring at my hands like is it just that i’m a slut for tragedy and wanted a worse ending to this book where like five major characters died....am EYE the problem for wanting this family to be irrevocably broken...am i too successionpilled.....

#green bone saga #jade legacy #jade legacy spoilers #okay i'll stop reblogging stuff about hilo now.

[gizkasparadise]

What's the show/s that got you into kdramas, cdramas? :) What are the shows you like to rewatch the most of? {I've found your posts to be straight up gems and I love them (well, except re TTEOTM, I do disagree somewhat on that xP esp ending. Not to mention the PPTs - I literally send those out to people I'm trying to rec the drama to xD; oh and you did the final nail in the coffin for me to watch Happiness and I LOVE IT; next up on my list thanks to you is Love and Redemption). Keep it up!! <3}

awww thank you!! LOL and no worries re: TTEOTM, different strokes for different folks and it's def not a perfect drama. in my defense, though, that ppt was made before the ending aired :'D

my first drama was moon lovers: scarlet heart ryeo, which is a drama that is extra as fuck, with a male lead who is extra and edgey as fuck, and it was a fun and wild ride. i got into it basically because gifs of lee joon ki with a tuxedo mask kept showing up on my dash and i was like ok time to join this party. and, well, here we are :'D im primarily attracted to how self-contained the stories of asian dramas are -- rarely are there sequels or franchises, and you get the whole thing knowing there's a planned ending. plus, good god. all the tropes. i love tropes.

i would say these are the dramas i've rewatched the most (disclaimer: i typically do selective rewatches, meaning just my favorite scenes lol)

someday or one day (taiwanese drama) has excellent rewatch value because of all the easter eggs and foreshadowing hints

wait my youth and le coup de foudre (cdramas) as well as extraordinary you and one spring night (kdramas) are chill comfort watches

love and redemption (cdrama) is a favorite and i love rewatching certain scenes because it just hits all the narrative tropes i love. im selectively rewatching empress ki and enjoying that as well as far as epic dramas go

i watch the bookends of goodbye my princess (basically first 10 and last 10 eps) when i just want something to punch me in the throat, emotionally

#asks! #kdrama #cdrama #twdrama

[epersonae]

five fic friday

this is going to be the last five fic friday before season 2, what the hell. let's go into the new season with Some Weird (or a little silly) Ones

a little worse for wear (practically walking on air) (G, 819) by @emi--rose - just a goofy little scene of Stede finding the marooned crew

an atypical emotional response to common sounds (E, 6612) by @yerbamansa - modern AU where Stede has really bad misophonia and Ed has the perfect voice given that (which is just canon, really). the phone sex is delightful.

Main Attraction (E, 1045) - listen, I wouldn't usually include what is basically PWP, but given this (yeah it's sweaty nipple taika (science edition) what of it) I feel legally required.

Close Encounters of the Stede Kind (T, 1336) - alien abduction AU???? With Ed as the alien???? SURE. Short and silly, and I am definitely wondering if the author has seen People of Earth.

Here Comes the Bride (E, 18K) by @veeagainsttheday - spoilers for the S2 promos (notably the teaser trailer), if you are avoiding that sort of thing. Very good reunion fic, not really so much weird, but I think it's a nice bookend to Emi's at the top of the list.

#five fic friday #ofmd #ofmd fic #(Bix how the fuck do you write so fast) #also I am more or less off tumblr unless summoned until probably next weekend #see you on the other side!

[basedkikuenjoyer]

I Know a Magical Girl Plot When I See It

1103 is in that weird limbo of us getting a scan way before the official release. Happens end of every year. I'll leave any spoilies under the cutoff, and for now we can just take in this fun color spread. Featuring Yamato & Momonosuke. Neat. Not that these two track with anything in the chapter within or my feelings on it. It's the Year of the Dragon and all.

We all ready? Okay, diddly dee it's 1103!

Okay first off this is sweet. Bonney's really moved up into my top 10 in her own right and that doesn't get brought up enough in all the meta discussion. We get a weird answer to our question last time. What the next segment looks like. Here we get a little of the night before but well, put a pin in that. We will also end on Kuma's arrival. Right at the perfect moment as Bonney echoes the start of the flashback. That's cool. From that meta perspective though, there are two very important scenes:

This chapter will go on to mostly focus on Jewelry Bonney, Saint Saturn, and Bartholomew Kuma. But it's important to note these two panels. First, Vegapunk clearly punts the night before. We saw part of it, a discrete part that pertains to what's happening right now. But we take the time to bait Vegapunk implying there's more going on. Pairs nicely with our main moment for the main cast. Uhh...who fed Luffy? This isn't insignificant. Like, you have Saturn trying to demoralize Bonney and freaking out about this because he realizes he could be dealing with functionally two Nikas. So who fed him? Reminds me of Caribou on Wano of course but any of these little crackles are important to me for more...flowery reasons.

Especially when you have the element of becoming a game of attention. Whoever delivered the food it did it without being noticed. Just like our attention is on Bonney's unfurling drama so too is Saturn's. Setting up Luffy for a recuperative Gum Gum Willow Snacking. I like that it kinda reminds me of Katakuri even if unintended. Enough with this, let's get to the real skinny:

Hey Kuma. Sup? So he's here. It's the tone, the tone of this is so weird to me. I want you to think of the title. A magical girl show. Jewelry Bonney feels like she is at the final climax of one of those. Nah, think about it. You have Saturn laying down the bits about how the Toshi-Toshi fruit would get weaker over time. It really is a cursed ability in that it diminishes as you age. But imagine you're watching a series where Bonney is the star and you see that moment as the final villain is unravelling how all the evil was his doing. It's the stand-in for imminent adolescence. So fitting I'm talking Narnia that often gets criticized for being too on the nose about this idea with Susan.

It's a common thread for stories about young girls for a reason. It's not exactly uncommon for rambunctious, adventurous, & imaginative young girls to become a lot more sensible and down-to-earth young women very quickly. I've literally seen a full mahou shoujo series about a sick girl who stuck a deal with spirits to be able to temporarily become her future self as an idol. That one was a rehash of several others. A loss of innocence moment and time running out on being able to use that power are hallmarks of the ending there. Same with daddy coming to save the day. We got our weird meta shit going on in the background so I'm happy, hell yeah bear boy.

Bonney is fully in Yamato territory for now as far as I'm concerned. As far as story structure, honestly since we still were in the past the first part and Bonney had the thematic "better off dead" bookend you could say this is the end of the flashback. This time the little blip being the mystery pile of food instead of the end. There aren't exactly hard and fast rules here but it is a lot like the last time we came back to Egghead now more than after 1102. Even stuff like the recap. Last time it was Doberman who was a bit of an unreliable narrator, this time we split it between three groups rapid fire all with their own perspective which is cool.

#one piece #chapter 1103 #post wano musings

[theflyindutchwoman]

So, I guess this is our official first date. Mm, last night was, for sure. I mean, it's a better story for the grandkids. We've got grandkids now. Nice.

| ANATOMY OF A SCENE - CHENFORD EDITION 5.10 - The List

Bookending the episode with Tim and Lucy's first and second dates is such an ingenious move. Particularly since both dates have a very distinct tone : if their first one was all about Tim and Lucy setting their boundaries, this one showcases how they perfectly match each other - and not just at work...

No more awkwardness, no fancy restaurant… This time, this is just them at a food truck, a subtle callback to all the times they ate together during their shifts… And that's why it also appears more true to them. There's an incredibly romantic feel to this scene - in a way, even more than that first date. The fairy lights behind them gives off this warm and delicate glow, creating an intimate atmosphere, reinforced by Tim and Lucy sitting extremely close to each other, her thigh between his.. This feels so much more like them and it shows in how much more comfortable they both are in this setting. Right down to their debate on whether this is their first official date or their second. It's not quite their typical bickering, but it is close. Their relationship is slowly shifting, towards something even better, without losing their dynamic.

They're so much more at ease that Lucy doesn't even hesitate to casually mention their future grandkids, as if this is completely normal and not mind blowing at all. She's obviously being playful but what it underlines is powerful. At no point does she try to take her remark back or look like she might regret saying it. She looks right at Tim. And the implications this has… This is someone who has always wanted to keep things casual with her former boyfriends - a label she even had trouble using in the first place. Someone who was uncomfortable at the idea of meeting Chris's parents and who was panicking at the idea of moving in with him. So the fact that she can joke about grandchildren on her second date says how much she is committed to this. And it's the perfect echo to that first date where she was expression her desire to take things slow. It's her way of making sure that Tim understands that just because she doesn't want to rush things, doesn't mean she is any less committed. She wants that future with him.

Tim's reaction is everything. He may have been caught by surprise, as his double take indicates, but the way he raises his eyebrow, still smiling and gently teasing her just shows how awed he actually is by this. His eyes are shining with excitement and his voice is so soft. His answer is so simple - Nice. But the weight it has… He's absolutely picturing that future in that moment. And his smile speaks for itself. The man is elated. But more than that : he is finally at peace. I don't think we have ever seen him this relaxed before. This is the look of someone who has finally found his person - one who wants the same things as him - and realises that he is getting it all. It's like a weight off his shoulders… We know he wanted to have kids with Isabel but it didn't work out, Ashley didn't want them and at that point, he probably thought that it was not in the cards for him. He was ready to settle and give up on his dreams. But now? He realises that he can have it all. And it's a pure bliss. And this is something Lucy knew. She was the one who asked him if he wanted to have children. She saw how he was contorting himself into someone he wasn't because he didn't think he deserved better. She pretty much did the same, not wanting to fight because it wasn't worth the bother. And I love that all along, she wanted that love story and she's also getting it.

Not even a moron trying to steal a car right in front of them can ruin this moment. But how significant is this that Tim doesn't try to pursue him. That's not something he would do for anyone. But some things matter more… Like their first real kiss. The way Lucy has his undivided attention… how he gently caresses her face, his other hand on her thigh, before slowly leaning in, almost shyly, both smiling into the kiss… how he dives right back for more, like he does every time, as if he can't get enough… This is the epitome of softness...

And how beautiful is it that their first real kiss is completely different their previous ones. And how meaningful is it that Tim is the one to initiate it this time around. Go on this date, maybe a second date, have our first real kiss… Their checklist is now complete!

#the rookie #chenford #chenfordedit #lucy chen #tim bradford #5.10 #Anatomy of a scene - Chenford Edition

[mitochondriaandbunnies]

Miami Vice S1E5: Calderone’s Return pt.1

Or, Vice strains against 80′s broadcasting norms and tries to have a season-long overarching plot (and NBC says no.)

There’s so much going on in this episode. Vice starts with a two parter, has just two standalone episodes, and then jumps into another two-parter using the same villain from the pilot. It jussst predates the proliferation of arc-based/ongoing plot-based TV, but Vice wanted desperately to be the show that ushered in that era. After this, it only gets a few episodes a season (at best) to play with long-running threads, but there’s quiet callbacks throughout and a strong sense of emotional consistency and resonance.

Thoughts and Feelings:

The episode opens on a stakeout, and there’s this wonderful contrast between the luridness of watching someone from across the street (which is underlined by Tubbs being kind of a creep) and the utter domesticity of Sonny shaving and getting ready in the next room. There’s an exchange where Sonny asks if he looks like he’s “a guy ready to get a divorce,” and then tells Tubbs to lie to him. Tubbs turns around and sees Sonny, and happily notes he’s shaved. About 10 seconds later, Zito and Switek come in and ask “what’s new today with America’s favorite couple--” a question that is intended to reference the person they’re surveilling, but which suddenly feels like a question about Crockett and Tubbs.

“Look on the bright side!” / “The bright side of divorce?”

Rico is desperate in this episode to prove how emotionally available he is, and it bookends the episode. He drives Sonny to court, he reminds him they’re partners, he says he’ll do anything he needs for him, and then at the end of the episode they have an incredibly similar conversation. Both times, Sonny is awkward and somewhat dismissive-- shattered by not only his divorce, but the impact of the events of the episode on his family, he is not emotionally available at all.

Sonny and Caroline are genuinely charming and lovable together, although there’s a distinct sense of bittersweetness in all their interactions. Rico could not be more awkward in his “oh dear god he just fucked his ex wife” conversation with Caroline at the door-- the speed with which he transitions between “How you doing” and “Is Sonny here” is whiplash inducing.

Rico flips out when he thinks Sonny is going to go get himself killed. This is episode five-- even assuming there’s some very strange time dilation going on, these two dues can’t have known each other for more than a few months. Nonetheless, his terror over Sonny possibly getting hurt is so great that he pins him to the wall and then agrees to go out on the suicide mission together when Sonny refuses to back down. Rico may sometimes seem better adjusted than Sonny, but uh. He uh. He sure has some trauma about Rafael he hasn’t worked through, doesn’t he

Gina and Trudy’s exchange picking up Linus the drug dealer: Trudy: “You take your place-- in the back.” / Gina: “Step on in, babycakes!” ... Why are they so cute

Sonny loves his damn kid SO much and is SO awkward with him. : ( He adores this child and has absolutely no fucking idea how to be a parent. His face as Billy walks away says it all.

GOOD GOD I LOVE THE OPENING TO THE SCENES AT THE DISCO. The footage is so weird, focusing on the machinery and the lights at strange angles, and so crisp and so spectacularly well timed to the music, and then once it cuts to the actual humans, there’s so many strange choices of angle, and the lighting is striking and unsettling, and. UGH. The bubbles! The confetti! The strobe effects! The fact that Vice is consistently able to light Black actors even in the dark!

The screaming bartender scene with Zito and Swi is so stupid and perfect

Trudy asks Gina to dance and then ten seconds later Gina beats a man with a seltzer hose. DON’T TALK TO TRUDY LIKE THAT. (There’s also a random lady in the background who just. Socks a guy in the teeth at the same time. Good for you, babe.)

The ending sequence, in which we know Sonny (and more importantly, Caroline and Billy) are still in danger but they don’t: the music is almost upbeat, which creates a palpable sense of tension and dread. It cuts, almost mid-phrase, when the shooter returns, and the only sounds for a while are gun shots. Once Mendes is dead, the Jan Hammer soundtrack returns.

Bonus:

Um.

POISON AND YOU

In what appears to be the Dr. Seuss font

The most appropriate possible prop for a scene in which the captain has just been fatally shot

#miami vice #miami vice s1 #s1e5 #sonny crockett #rico tubbs #calderone's return #my gifs

[orhelponefaintingrobin]

Feeling Messy About Power Rangers

So, I just finished 'Power Rangers: Cosmic Fury', and I have feelings. Like, not just thoughts, but feelings.

Because the thoughts are simple. I was really impressed with how well Power Rangers adapted to a shorter serialised format, I thought the acting quality took a massive step up from Dino Fury (which was already an improvement over the past few iterations), I loved how they integrated a few other rangers, most of all Billy, who it felt wonderful getting to see be such a key part of this series given how big a part he was back when it all started - and the behind-the-scenes struggles he was put through by the show's crew. And the ending felt like a perfect bookend for this version of the franchise - not just the Dino Fury saga, but of this whole 30 year legacy.

But here's the thing, as it's ended, I do have those feelings about the fact that, as it stands, this is likely to be the end of Power Rangers as it's been for the past 30 years. And I think I'm only realising now that it's finished that I do actually feel a little sad about that fact.

Power Rangers has been a part of my life for so long. Not a huge part, at least not for all of it, but it's always been there, in the background. When I was younger, it was the coolest thing in the world. I don't remember watching Dino Thunder for the first time, but I certainly remember when that came to a close and being so exciting to see the premiere of SPD. I still have a bag of Power Rangers toys in the loft, a collection I built up over so many years. I dropped off for a few years, but got back into it in my mid/late teen years, when it's addition to Netflix led to a nostalgic return to the franchise, one which kept me in as I realised that this was always a little more than a cheesy kids show. Don't get me wrong, it is absolutely, 100% that, but it always had more to offer.

I'm not saying it's the only reason, that there aren't other factors, but embarrassing as it perhaps should be to admit, I can credit this franchise for a big part of who I am. If you were to ask me what my core drive is, what motivates me more than anything else, my honest answer is that I want to help people. It's why I love working in the charity sector, it's why I'm training to be a counsellor, it's why I hold the political views I do. My core, favourite franchise in the world, from the age of 5, was the one about the teams that saved people; normal, ordinary people who just did the right thing because, well, someone has to, and they're the ones who were given the power to do it.

Power Rangers, this silly, cheesy kids superhero show, that exists because it was cheaper to license footage from an often even sillier, cheesier kids superhero show (love you too Super Sentai, don't worry), that was purely made to sell me toys, was a part of my life when I was 5 years old and knew nothing about the world, it was a part of my life as I sought to find my way, and it's a part of my life now, as a grown woman, who still remembers the lessons it taught me twenty years ago.

This franchise will continue, and I'm excited to see where it goes. I will watch it, and hopefully I will enjoy it. But it will never be my Power Rangers, the franchise as it was, the franchise that I have loved for two decades. That, this week, got its perfect ending. And I'm just now realising how much this stupid show means to me.

#Power Rangers #Power Rangers Cosmic Fury

[charmed-and-alarmed]

EPISODE 8 - in which Garp's family drama comes with a death toll and a bill for at least million berry in property damage

See episode 7 here

God I hate scenes of involuntary tattoos. Seeing her shackled is horrible enough ty

Luffy has a permanent case of frowny eyebrows this episode

Now we get the villagers! Poor Nami's worst nightmare aka the villagers trying to take up arms and fight Arlong's pirates

I like that Helmeppo and Koby are blatantly just lingering in the back of the room so they can eavesdrop

How did Usopp get all those smoke bombs to go off?

God I love this fight. The teamwork, with Zoro running up a wall (?) to stop someone attacking Luffy, and Sanji watching Zoro's back. Really sets up Sanji and Zoro as Luffy's big hitters

Aaaand Sanji and Zoro are bickering. And it leads them to let Buggy's head go free, so obvs Buggy fucks off and leaves them high and dry. You two share one brain cell, I swear.

Arlong's lecture about fishmen based speciesism vs Luffy, who discovered discrimination existed like two days ago

Don't worry Usopp, we saw your great victory against the fish man. It will never be forgotten.

I did NOT need a close up on Arlong regrowing his broken teeth.

Luffy finally realizes it's time to lean on his strengths - in this case, his talent for wanton property destruction

"all great fighters call out their finishing moves" and "yeah, you're going to fit in just fine"

Nami just bypasses Sanji and like, I get it, but could someone please give the man a hug. Everyone's been so mean to him today

... and there goes the neighborhood. Glad Nami had the hat, bc it would be hard to salvage if the building came down on it

The Marines randomly showing up at the end here makes no sense. What a weird way to end the season. I'm glad we got to see Koby stand up for himself (and Helmeppo standing at his side)

These poor Marines are standing there as it slowly dawns on them that this entire pirate chase has been the vice admirals fucking family drama playing out on the high seas. Men have died for your bullshit, Garp. And then it's all "oh well, I guess I'll let you go be a pirate, Luffy" like nothing happened, bc this is all some kind of test? Which I don't buy at all btw - dude, you weren't testing shit. You wanted to control Luffy and when that didn't work, you came up with a scenario that made it seem like you were in control the whole time.

I don't like Garp. Fuck that guy

This last bit with Koby makes the whole Marine thing worth it tho. Bc he wants to be the one to show Luffy the wanted poster first. Koby looks overcome with love emotions and it's a perfect little bookend to them at the start of the show.

Best reaction to the wanted poster obvs goes to Zeff, bc you know Sanji never managed to get 'employee of the month'

And then the fucking scene with Mihawk and Shanks - what is this?? Mihawk so clearly looks exasperated but then he's willing to stay and drink with Shanks & Co? What ARE you two??

The little cast off ceremony at the very end is so cute tho, with their younger selves saying it with them? Perfect ending is perfect. With just a tiny hint of smoker to get us excited for next season

Anyways, I still love this show. I'm going to go back to watching the anime - maybe I'll post about that, maybe not. Who can say? I just hope everyone had as much fun as I did

#opla #opla spoilers

[write-and-buried]

I'm thrilled that you're enjoying all of us spiraling down the tlou rabbit hole but also-- may we hear your thots ? 👀👀

FUCK YES

So, spoiler free. After i finished the episode i went grocery shopping and accidentally bought fifty bucks worth of comfort cheese.

TLOU SPOILERS (EPISODE ONE & GAME) BELOW THE CUT

OK, In no particular order;

The way they introduced the concept of a fungal pandemic was amazing, the absolute dread that opener inspired was absolutely amazing, and I really commend them for adding that little bit of world building.

Speaking of dread - the way we just follow Sarah about her day, the little hints of the world rapidly going to hell around them with her being an innocent child who is none the wiser, was amazing. The old lady twitching out of focus in the background was hella effective.

Oh god. Joel & Sarah. Their relationship is perfect. The way they caught this sliver of one day of their lives and you already know so much about them, that Sarah has definitely been raised in a loving environment, feels comfortable and safe with her dad, and that they are extremely close. It's magnificent.

Im gonna jump around a little here, but the bookend deaths in this episode were EXTREMELY effective. Joel killing his neighbour with a wrench out of necessity, the way Sarah reacts (reasonably and terrified) and almost looks at her dad differently. Ellie, who watches Joel brutally murder someone with his bare hands, which it could be argued he didnt have to do (this guy could have been bribed) and she looks like she trusts him more.

TESS!! Oh god. TBH I never really paid her much attention on my playthroughs, but MAN they did us a favour by fleshing her out - the softness and intimacy she displays with Joel, the sarcasm.

THAT scene; I knew it was coming. I knew I would cry. I didnt know id cry so hard id have to pause the show, get up and have a cigarette to calm down.

ELLIE;

Bella Ramsey is perfect in this role. They have such a command of the character, the sarcasm, you already get the feeling that she knows she is alone in the world, and is trying to hide it as best she can. But Ellie is just a kid.

The scene of her immediately getting yeeted into a wall was absurdly funny and shouldnt have made me laugh.

She places her trust in strength, and that's going to come back in Winter.

JOEL;

Oh god Joel.

Lets talk about two BIG changes they have made, right off the bat. He is more sympathetic, and more unhinged.

The drugs, was a surprising choice, but one that makes complete sense. He is truly a wounded animal, medicating and lashing out at any given opportunity.

I love that they have him as Tess's attack dog - because thats exactly what he is. A German Shepherd with PTSD.

His blunt, dont give a fuck attitude is absolutely spot on, and the way he carries himself, single minded and focused is so spot on.

THEY HAD NO RIGHT FOR OUR FIRST SHOT TO BE OF A SHIRTLESS SNUGGLER - THAT WAS RUDE AS FUCK

LETS GET THIS OUT OF THE WAY - ALWAYS KEEP HIM WET. THE SLICK BACK HAIR, THE WHORE STANCE, THE ABSOLUTE FERAL LOOK OF RAGE ON HIS FACE, I AM DESPERATE TO FUCK THIS MAN.

POSTCARDS;

RATION CARDS AND PUBLIC EXECUTIONS THAT'S WHERE MY BABIES LIVED I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

In short, I loved it. I thought it was a wonderful first episode, with enough nods to the game for people who have played it, without leaving those who havent completely in the dark.

#tlou spoilers #joel miller #i have feelings and thoughts

[nieded]

AALS, an essay

I have written down my thoughts on how AALS came about and why it's written the way it is. This has spoilers for the story up until Chapter 14, so if you're waiting to catch up, tread carefully. But also, consider this a fair warning about the content of the story if you have heard things and are wondering whether you should pick it up.

When I started writing Sit Tight, Take Hold, I was terrified. I had recently entered this newer phase in my writing where it became ugly and personal, but also therapeutic. If you ever go through my back catalog, you may find a weird story or two. I tend to write a lot either about personal identity or found family, but STTH was the first time I began to address some of the biphobia and insecurities I have experienced in my life in such a specific, acknowledged way.

To preface this, I am Crowley. I am also many other characters in this universe, and Crowley is also other people I have known in my life in this universe, but mainly, Crowley is me. So if putting STTH out there was nerve-wracking, Accept a Little Spin has been doubly so. And the accusations that I am supporting infidelity or emotional cheating or whatever is inaccurate despite these things appearing in the story.

This is why I wrote AALS, to address two specific ideas in my head: self-growth and queerness, and I will explain how it affects both of the main characters.

Self-growth

Ezira is a young man. Twenty-six isn't super young, I suppose, but for me, I had just finished grad school and packed up all my belongings to move halfway across the US to a state I had never visited before, where I knew exactly one person, in a demanding, emotionally exhausting and isolating field I had limited real-life experience with. In short, I felt like a colt on fresh legs. In this way, Ezira is similar. He has been so deep in the closet that he has gone without acknowledging his sexual orientation and how it affects his identity. And now that he has the freedom to explore, he doesn't know who to listen to or where to begin. He has had one job, limited public education, and has now been asked to be the face of gays in sports. That's a big burden.

Ezira makes a lot of mistakes moving forward in this story, but to reach his final form in Part Three, he needs to do the work to self-assess and learn. He needs to experience good things but also the bad. He needs to confront the vast opinions out there in the world and figure out what he wants and what he believes in. Ezira isn't a likeable person in this story, but he is relatable, I think. He is, at least to me. I have rarely liked or fully trusted individuals who are in this stage of life, but it's telling to me that there are readers out there who don't relate to what he's going through. I'm not sorry to say this. If you are someone who doesn't at least get the pressure Ezira is under or that individuals are flawed while still being inherently good, this story isn't for you.

AJ, on the other hand, is well-settled. He has steadfast opinions on the world. He knows what he wants (though he is still learning how to ask for them), but he still has all of this baggage. AJ is a person who has had his trust degraded by people who should have loved him. His parents. His past relationships. His employers. Life taught him that he was a commodity, and he still bases his worth on what he can do for other people. The idea of Acts of Service can be sweet, but in this case, it comes from constantly undervaluing himself and feeling like he has to earn love from people.

His arc about growth is a little longer because the damage is deeper, but he makes great progress in AALS.

Mild spoiler: **There's an upcoming scene in Part Three where Crowley is confronted by this idea of unconditional love, and it doesn't come from who you think it does! But it really feels like the perfect bookend to his arc. It's not necessarily the climax of the story, but it is for me.**

The final quarter of AALS, particularly chapters 16 and 17, are about doing the work individually to not just be a better partner, but to be a better person as a whole. I do not want this story to solely focus on how they can be better for each other. That is not the point of this story. It's about how they can better for themselves and how that positively impacts their interactions with others. These chapters may not feel entirely satisfying, but it's intentional because in my mind, that work never ends.

Queerness

I set out writing AALS to explore the idea of queer identity and queer community, including confronting the bias and misconceptions queer people have of each other. I identify as bi. Hi. I am not out to most people because of fear of judgment, that I will be considered less-than or not 'really queer.' I have had worse reactions coming out to gay and lesbian people than I have had straight people, but let me tell you, straight people have not been great either! Queer comes in every flavor, which is why every queer character has different opinions on what that means and what it looks like. This causes conflict in the story.

The story also addresses the constant microaggressions queer people face. In Chapter 14, Ezira and AJ both hint at Hungary. It's briefly mentioned as well in STTH, but I've never addressed it fully. Something did happen, and it was ugly, but I've never had the energy to put it into words. We have to deal with this shit every day, and despite this story being a reflection on my real life, it was one area I didn't want to explicitly address.

But from misgendering Beez to biphobia to outright legal barriers (hey, did you know it's illegal for homosexuals to marry in Greece? Never mind all the extremely homophobic countries and states both Formula 1 and IndyCar visit), to the internalized homophobia that someone like Lili carries around, queerphobia is a constant, belittling experience across both stories.

To counteract that, however, I very much wanted this story to be about queer community. Does Nolan have stupid opinions as an uneducated, young 19-year-old? Yep! But does he also now have a community of peers that he can learn from? Yes! Spoiler, Nolan remains a prominent member of the brunch club, and no, he does not get dropped as a friend for his gross comments. We don't see his growth because he is a very minor character, but that brunch club and Marnie and Stephen are very much there for him as much as they are there for Ezira. And to counteract Nolan, there's Adam, who seems to be the angel on Ezira's shoulder and a source of reason.

And Lili. Whyyyy Lili? She has been a controversial character in this story. Some of that has been intentional in order for Ezira to confront his own biases. Remember, Ezira has been surrounded by straight people his entire life, comes from a homophobic country, and grew up in a hyper masculine sport. And some of his initial opinions come from a place of misogyny and biphobia. Yep. It's not because he's a bad person, and I wanted to make a point of showing their friendship evolving without some aha! moment.

But Lili is also there to be supportive of Crowley. I never intended for it to come off as Crowley emotionally cheating with Lili, but I do see the point commenters have made. That's part of the joy and burden of putting a story out in the world. It no longer becomes mine but a shared experience. I don't mind these interpretations, but I do get upset when people think she's outright malicious for growing up in a rural Midwest town, feeing lonely, and in need of support.

Lili is for Crowley because I could not imagine him going through IndyCar alone, or confronting his past with Javier, or going through a break in his relationship. He's not necessarily being open with her (is he ever with anyone???), but he has a friend to lean on. And Crowley is for Lili, too. This is her first sense of real queer community where she can be out and open, and it's giving her space to evaluate her past relationship with The Ex because she's never had anyone to talk to before.

And Beez. It's no secret Beez is my favorite character. They aren't featured a lot in this story, but their touch is felt through every moment. They connect Crowley and Lili, and let me tell you, they did it for Lili more than they did it for Crowley. But to my point above, they are also not a perfect character. They sometimes give bad advice, which leads to Crowley and Ezira not talking about their issues for too long. Beez also helped Crowley hide his meeting with Eve. But Beez was the first person to ever love Crowley without conditions, and it steered him away from the self-destructive road he was going to go down alone. Up until now, Beez has been the only family Crowley has had.

Beez is the community in this story. They approached Crowley first. They encourage Lili to connect with Dagon and go back to school. They aren't the oldest character in this story, but they are the one who has been out the longest and knows what it feels like to be without a family, so they push for others to make to those connections.

The point is, AJ and Ezira are endgame, yes, but for me, that's not what this story is about. For me, the story is about growth and community and how it can shape a person to be their best self, so they can share all the love they've received with someone else.

#accept a little spin #rainbow road #ni speaks