#then isnt that all the sweeter? an innocent wish from a boy that just wants everything to be just how it was before being | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bigtittydemonwife · 4 years

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Yandere creeps? 👀

Of course! since you didn’t specify who you wanted I decided to do Toby, Masky, Hoodie, Liu, EJ, LJ, Jeff and Jane

Ticci Toby

Honestly it wouldn’t take much for this man to go yandere honestly. Just show him kindness. He’s been shown cruelty his whole life so someone treating him with basic decency and not expecting anything out of it? Yeah he’s in love.

While he will treat you like a queen, if you fight back you will be punished. He doesn’t want to physically hurt his S/O, but he’s not below anything mentally. He will murder your loved ones right in front of you. All while saying things like “It’s you’re fault, I’m the only one who is allowed to love you”

But if your completely fine with being with him? (Don’t @ me I know there are some of you out there) He’s so happy! Expect cuddles everyday, they’re mandatory. He’s still possessive as all hell though. While he trusts you not to run away he does NOT trust others to not steal you away. No matter what you’re leaving the house for he’s coming with you. Taking out the trash? Wait for him. Getting grocery’s? Let him get his shoes. This leads to quote unquote dates a lot.

He needs you with them so don’t ever try to leave, love him and you should be fine. But don’t think it’s all happiness. He’s a PTSD ridden Schizophreniac with most likely trust issues and intimacy issues. There are days where you can tell him you love him a thousand times and he’s yelling about how you’re lying. But in a hour he’ll be back crying and begging for forgiveness.

He struggles with emotions so remember, he was major trouble showing love. The way he does it headpats, cuddles and not murdering you.

Eyeless Jack

Now this man is a mystery rapped in a enigma rapped in a riddle. For him, its tougher to figure out why he’s obsessed with you. But I’d say its how you are psychologically and what you’re life’s like.

Maybe its because of how generally kind you are despite knowing how shit life and people can be. Maybe he wants to protect the innocence he used to have?

Who knows. But as with Toby, Mans Possessive. Not in a lock you up kinda way (That would come later). But stalkerish. You may think you’re alone but you never are. Man knows you’re whole shecdual. And while he won’t KILL anyone who hurts you, that would draw way to much attention. But what he does is much worse.

He probably takes the longest out of all the creeps to show himself to you. And not even in person. He’d start with notes. If you return his feelings your safe and now have a cannibalistic stalker protector. If you don’t......well...We’ll unpack that someother time.

Masky

Again, Show him kindness, But its still a little different from Toby. If you fully understand what he’s done, the person he is. But still think he deserves kindness. He thinks you’re naive. Yeah, He starts off thinking your fucking stupid. Starting.

But as it goes on, and you continue to show him kindness. Even when you know what he’s done, He starts to warm up to your kindness. But if you witness him cold blooded murdering someone. He’s ready for you to leave. But if you dont. You still treat him kindly. He wants to save this nativity. Being naive in this world is a death wish. So he’ll barely let you leave the house. And he’s always with you. Unlike EJ. He will murder anyone who fucks with you. And leave no evidence behind. As far as anyones concerned they’ve dissapeared from the earth.

Once again if you love this man. You have to put up with this. No negotiations. He loves you and thats how he shows it. But if you do put up with it. And show this man all the love. Maybe it will be alright.

But like EJ, Never try and leave him, Unlike some creeps he will hurt his S/O physically, but then will cry into their arms begging them to forgive him. Or a different punishment might go an NSFW way if you know what I mean.....

Hoodie

Again, Complicated. His obsession probably comes very quickly. Someone whose creative like him, Who questions the bigger things in life. Someone he could have a intelligent conversation with.

He’s a stalker. He watches his S/O all day. Nothing they do could bore him. But he gets jealous very easy. Why else do you think the cute person in the library that gave you their number hasn’t come back? Or hasn’t texted you?

He’s probably take a while to show himself to his S/O. And once he finally gets the courage. He’ll send them a letter. You two’ll become penpals. He’s kept every single one of your letters and keeps them in a folder.

He does have trouble showing his emotions though, Showing his S/O He loves them would be returning letters, Giving them small trinkets (like a magpie) and not murdering them.

Prefurs not to hurt his S/O, If they try to run away he’ll just psychologically torture them. Following them and disappearing when the call the police. Making them think they’re the only one who can see him. Anyone who they care about disappears. But this only happends if you run away and don’t love him back.

So love him and you’ll be good....you’ll just have to deal with Possessiveness, Paranoia, Obssession, and Jealousy.

Jane The Killer

With most of the creeps. Be kind to her, But not just her. If your a generally kind person who shows others respect but refuses to to bow down to bullies. Shes in love

Shes quite quick to talk to her S/O, She’ll ask for they’re number, and because of how normal she looks (And how pretty she is) you say yes.

Late night texts about random things, if you rant to her about your interests she could listen all day.

(To quote The Killers) Jealousy

Its her life quest to keep creepers who remind her of Jeff away from you, Speaking of Jeff is he ever went near you shes starting a riot.

She loves cuddles, intamacy is a must. She needs you to stay near her. Once again won’t hurt her S/O but if they try to run away they’re getting locked in a room alone untill they’re begging for her to come back so they can hear someone’s voice that isnt their own and touch them. She’s not above depriving her S/O of intimacy should the moment call for it.

Possessive. You need her and only her. Everyone else doesnt matter. Show her love and no one else.

Jeff The Killer

He’s most likely to become obsessed with someone whose nice to people. But will fight a bitch. If your sassy and don’t take shit he’s in love. But remember hes a twisted psychopath who murdered his family and his neighbours. His love isnt what you’d call socially acceptable. He’d kill for you in a flash. Anyone, people you love or hate. They’re dissapearing.

Unlike the others, he won’t show himself to you quickly BUT he will not hide his love. Scribbled love notes written in blood. Dead animals on your porch. He’s kinda like a dog.

He will hurt his S/O if they don’t love him, Mentally or Physically he doesnt mind, He see’s it as a necessary step.

He needs physically affection.

Isnt a soft relationship to be honest. Cuddles and kisses yes. But no soft words. Just sass, violent outbursts, Hate sex, Angry sex, Makeup sex. Yeah lots of sex.

He’s a horndog what can I say?

But maybe, just mayyybeee once In a blue moon, you’ll be cuddling and he’ll think your asleep, and whisper he loves you in his ear. Pretend your asleep though.

Laughing Jack

He needs someone he can laugh with, Someone with a sort of wonder to them. He likes those type of people.

Since he’s a childs imaginary friend(?) He doesn’t really understand love, But obsession? Yes.

He’s not gonna show himself to his S/O for ages. I mean, Hes like a seven foot tall clown. Total boyfriend material.

He’ll leave candy on your doorstep, Or cute little trinkets, Like music boxes.

Gives the best hugs honestly. He’ll lift you right up off the ground and spin you around. Honestly he carries you everywhere like a princess.

CARNIVIAL DATES.

Anyone, literally anyone makes you feel sad or makes the wonder in your eyes leave. They’re loved ones are getting turned into candy, then they’re forced to eat them. Then they get murdered gruesomely. He’s all you need and he’ll protect you.

He loves to slow dance with you. He’ll play some old classical music.

(I headcanon he has a British accent)

He’ll cut you off from all your friends, or make them disappear, He’s all you need.

Homicidial Liu/Sully

(Its so hard to find good gifs for these boys)

This boy needs a hug, Him and Sully.

Stalkers. They need affection. They’ll follow they’re S/O wherever they go. No mater what they do.

They’re S/O has a partner? Not for much longer.

Liu gives cute gifs and notes like Flowers, or shiny trinkets, Sully gives weirder stuff, Like random stones or shiny things. And his notes are scrubbed much more.

Nickname them Magpie they’ll love it.

While Liu is defiantly the more sweeter one, He’ll never hurt his S/O, but he will score them if he must. Sully on the other hand, all for scaring them. Despite what others think he loves them, and he doesn’t want to hurt them to much because he wants them to be his. And they can’t be his if they’re dead.

You know all the jealousy I said Jeff had? Imagine that but doubled.

Thats your realtionship. While Liu will be more defensive if someone’s hurting or flirting with you. Sully aggressive. Back away from whats his.

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possessionisamyth · 4 years

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i know the ending had to be rushed because instead of the usual 13 episode seasons AS decided to drop genndy to 10, BUT i started thinking about the daughters of aku and boy do i have some things to say writing wise, and no this isnt about “realism” but just how to make their presence as a unit more impactful or how to make ashi’s character development better as a temp antagonist to jack, spoilers below if you havent finished watching samurai jack

Option 1: Have the daughters of Aku be raised by Aku.

Some people have already suggested this as a cute AU, but to be honest that would strengthen the daughters bond with Aku more than just having hearsay through their mother. And since Aku does have emotions, isn’t afraid to spread propaganda onto children (the fairytale episode), and is building a kingdom that encompasses the universe, that would’ve been a great alternate to Jack’s stance, where instead of fighting just some assassin troupe he’s technically fighting an assassin troupe of princesses when he was once a prince whose own kingdom was destroyed by their father.

The bonds between the sisters would be tighter in that they respected their father both out of fear and the time they spent with him because he would’ve told them all the lies they needed to hear for them to trust him, he would’ve taken moderately good care of them(basic provisions), and he would definitely let them wreak havoc where ever they wanted without suffering consequences as long as they didn’t fuck up his own shit. “Mindless drone sisters except for one” doesn’t stick for long when it comes to guilt about murdering them, but “rebel girl gang who trusts their father and has many reasons to think you’re genuinely the bad guy” definitely would.

To not just have Ashi yelling at Jack, but all of the sisters shit talking him out of vitriol. Throwing his guilt back into his face. “If you’re so great, why couldn’t you save them? If you’re so good, why did you kill them?” Have Jack have to deal with his guilt inside and outside from a group of women who were indoctrinated to believe everything their father said just like Jack was and then really make him question what’s the difference between him and them? His father could’ve done all the same things telling him what’s evil and what isn’t. Yes, he still knows Aku is evil, but this train of thought would be humanizing them even further to the brink where Jack isn’t sure he can kill any of them. Cause it was “easier” when he could believe they didn’t have any emotions except for one (Ashi) but much more impossible when he has to accept that they all do. “They’re just robots.” No, they’re not. They’re just like you, Jack.

Option 2: Some sisters don’t die.

Make the killing blows accidents. Going with their canon way of being raised, have Jack still understand that they’re people, and make the killing blows reactionary instead of functionary. He doesn’t want to kill them, but he’s so used to fighting, he’s so used to defending himself that the weapons he grabs and the attacks he does manage to hit the vitals of a few of the sisters while the rest he leaves mortally wounded or physically incapable of fighting. If they’re really raised as machines to kill him, this would leave them useless to complete the task.

Then have Jack, as he’s leaving the scene of carnage have to witness the sisters who can move crawling towards their fallen sisters, trying to hold back bleeding wounds, scraping through the reddening snow in an attempt to show compassion for the one’s whose lives are fading away.

And then have Jack make a choice. He could leave them there. Some of them might make it, but probably not. Even if they all did, they wouldn’t be able to chase him any more. The wounds he inflicted on them would prevent them from fighting as they used to unless they got a fuck ton of physical therapy and/or robotic prosthesis. Or, he could do the same as he did with Ashi in canon and take the survivors. Teach them about the world. About Aku’s lies. About what he’s really fighting for, and let them make the choice on their own. Because they never had a choice before, but now they do, and let it be overwhelming and confusing. Let them make mistakes, but let them learn from it. They don’t all have to make the right choice at the end, but they shouldn’t have to die for it. Show the conflict and correction from sisters who did make the right choice and let them be.

Option 3: None of the sisters die by Jack’s hand.

Same as option two, but Jack doesn’t kill any of them. He saves the ones who need immediate medical attention, teaches them, and lets those sisters go back to the ones he only inhibited. The saved sisters try to pass the rhetoric they learned only to be deemed weak and now they all have to fight each other. It can be to the death. The evil sisters who refused to change or learn would die, Ashi wouldn’t be by herself. They’d all have to come to terms with what they’ve done as some either go to fight Aku with Jack and Ashi, while the others leave so they can stew in their guilt of killing their sisters.

Option 4: Get his ass!!!!!

Have Ashi actively resent Jack for killing all her sisters. No, I don’t care what half-assed explanation Ashi gave to her mother, you don’t get raised with 6 other people and some of them NOT form of bond between each other when you’re all working towards the same goal. Especially when they had to function as a unit! Her mother wasn’t Aku, she didn’t see everything they did as soon as it was bedtime for 20 something years.

I want this to be a chip on her shoulder, I don’t want her shifting the blame of everything onto her mother. Yes, Jack was going to kill everyone and only Ashi survived, but why didn’t he do the killing blow for her? Why didn’t he try harder to save any of the other sisters? Why did he go for the kill shot every time instead of just mortally wounding them to prevent them from fighting if he knew they were humans and not robots? Isn’t he supposed to protect people? Isn’t he supposed to save people? Like yes, still have her learn the world is a wonderful place and Aku is making it worse, and still have her go to fight Aku for the sisters she’d lost, but don’t have her fall in love with the man who killed the only family she’d ever known before being thrusted into an unknown world and then have a sexual awakening on top of that??????? WHAT???????

Would've been better having Ashi see things and think of memories of her sisters that connected her with them through said images or objects, and then going through the process of mourning for each one before the confrontation with her mother.

Option 5: Have Ashi fall in love with Jack first. (Best One for Romance)

Can we say scouting missions? The daughters of aku were displayed as being curious through scenes when they observe unusual behaviors to the new environments they’re scouring through. Have them hunt Jack without the efficiency of the imakandi, and learn about the world on their own. Ashi is the leader so she’s responsible for finding Jack first, but that leaves the other six to sharpen weapons, get supplies,etc. They do need to eat and sleep as they’re still human. Then they have to interact with people, and animals, and nature and learn on their own. Have them hear stories about how great Aku is, and how awful Aku is from a variety of the people they have to meet from these supply runs or leads towards Jack that turn out to be false.

Make them argue with each other about what’s true and what isn’t from what they’ve heard of Aku. Show a struggle of acceptance when the strangers they talk to present proof of how “Great” or “Awful” Aku has been. Let them make the decision on what being human actually means WHILE Ashi is scouting and watching Jack do all these good things for innocent people, and then have her come back to settle any confusion ready to say their mother is wrong only to be interrupted by their mother telling them Jack’s location before Ashi can get the words out.

Even sweeter if you have Jack notice when he’s alone versus when he’s “alone” (ashi is watching), and he talks to her. It starts with things like “if your intent is to kill me, I ask you to reconsider” then changes to “if you’re hungry, i’m leaving the excess here, help yourself” until its “your killing intent has long since vanished, do you wish to speak to me finally?” because Jack is already used to randos turning into traveling companions (blue totoro, da samurai, scotsman, ikra) he can accept the stalking to an extent as long as it doesn't escalate negatively.

After their mother’s message, the sisters find Jack, but they struggle to fight him not out of lack of skill, but because they know so much about the world now, and they’re not sure what to believe anymore. Let Jack see their hesitation and capitalize on it with his words, until Ashi puts her foot down by taking Jack’s side. Since she’s the leader, and with all they know now, they choose to follow Ashi’s word. They then proceed to travel together and tease tf out of Ashi about her feelings for the samurai.

Final thoughts:

Any of these options excluding 4 since it’s more canon streamlined, could be much more easily done by having the first half of the series being about the sisters development flanking Jack’s turmoil plot, and the second half being about the daughters making mistakes and learning from them as they build towards the final fight which becomes much more badass in that Jack’s friends are fighting anywhere from 2-7 daughters of aku in that cool evil form with all the evil robots.

The relationship of the daughters of aku was more of a pacing issue than a writing issue, but I think if they focused more on the fact of we’re going to watch a family die over a lie instead of “they’re all mindless and only ashi has emotions” their deaths would’ve hurt A Lot more. Ashi’s development would’ve been more meaningful, and Jack’s guilt would’ve been much heavier. However someone wanted their hashed in romance so I guess this would’ve stuck a sword in their well-made plans.

Not to mention the idea that the daughters were the only people Jack killed over the span of 50 years makes it ring more out as shock value killing. As if there wouldn’t be non-robotic aliens or non-robotic humans or non-robotic human-alien hybrids who wouldn’t 100% follow Aku of their own violation? Nah, we’ve seen them, and we can see what privilege does to people. Plus if they had privileges that would be taken away by Aku’s downfall...well...I don’t think Aku was the only one asking for Jack’s head on a platter.

#samurai jack #daughters of aku #ashi #jashi #meta #i do like jashi i just wish it was executed better #long post of alternatives

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wolfqueen-is-here · 5 years

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Kisses Remembered, Kisses Forgotten (Jonsa Secret Santa 2018)

Dearest @moonchildslife, I am so sorry for my delay, Christmas was crazier than I expected, and I didn’t finish my gift on time. But it is here now, and I hope you don’t find it too terrible ;). I wish you a wonderful year with Jonsa becoming canon in April and our fandom wishes coming true. Be happy, be healthy, be yourself! <3

Many thanks to @jonsasecretsanta2018 who made all of this happen, you truly are amazing!

A/N Don’t be alarmed by a brief mention of the Hound. I promise you, it has nothing to do with SanSan in any way except mentioning The Un-Kiss. Book!canon, but mostly show!canon, can be interpreted both as a filler and an AU. 2300 words

Kisses Remembered, Kisses Forgotten

Every now and then Sansa remembers, even though she has tried so hard to leave the past behind. The Hound was rough and scary, but the kiss that he took left a lingering taste on her lips—it was as soft as snow, almost familiar, she’s caught herself missing the shy affection that came with the kiss, a wary touch so vulnerable it felt almost childish. She remembers the kiss that he took. The only thing she doesn’t remember is him taking it.

Every night feels longer and darker than the former ones. It isn’t until she jumps from Winterfell walls that she remembers how to feel warm again, but the road north is as cold as ice and covered in snow. “His lips felt warm”, she thinks as she runs towards her freedom. “The kiss that he took, it felt warm.”

There are times when she is almost certain that she gave it willingly.

—

“You look cold,” Jon says after staring at her in silence for a good half an hour. It would annoy her beyond reason, were it anyone else, anyone less trustworthy, anyone less… Jon, but coming from him it’s almost flattering. No one has ever cared for her so since she’d lost Father. Not once until this very moment has she felt safe since then.

“I’m okay,” she smiles. His unblinking eyes refuse to leave hers even for a second as if she’d vanish otherwise. Sansa leans towards him and strokes the inside of his palm with her thumb. It’s the most innocent of caresses, but it makes Jon stiffen and finally lower his head. She misses the stare instantly. “I’m okay, Jon.”

She tastes his name on her tongue. It feels rough—when was the last time she used it? —but sweeter than all the cake she’s ever had. She wants to swallow it, possess it, make it hers. “Jon,” she muses. “Jon. My Jon.”

If it’s something more primal than sisterly affection, she doesn’t recognise it in time. It may occur to her later, but it will be too late.

—

The first night that she spends at Castle Black is a sleepless one. The shadows are long when she paces aimlessly around the room, too exhausted to fall asleep, too cold to lie still. Knocking at the door alerts her at first—she’s not used to feeling safe yet—she whispers: “Who’s there?” so quietly as if she were hoping nobody would answer.

“It’s me,” Jon says.

She lets him in.

“Do you have everything that you need?” he asks, looking at her with a strange longing.

Had it been more fitting, she’d say: “I have you,” but in their current situation she’d stumble over the words for certain. Instead, she just invites him to stay—just sit next to her and not talk until the sun rises and the shadows go back under her bed. They repeat it every night after that, it seems to comfort both of them.

—

Jon’s eyes follow Sansa as he tries to find something—anything—that would remind him of a little girl she used to be. Her skirts dance when she rocks her hips, walking around Castle Black like she’d lived here all her life. He wants to avert his gaze but finds it impossible. She’s grown so tall, so slender—so beautiful.

“She’s your sister,” he thinks angrily, hiding his face in his hands. “You are not allowed to look at her like that.”

There were times, many lives ago, when they were only children. Sansa’s hair was more orange than auburn, Jon’s face—smooth, not a trace of beard or scars on it. They both called lord Eddard Stark their father. They both walked around holding Robb’s hand. They both watched Bran fall asleep while they were singing lullabies. Both, yes, but not—together.

When he tries to think about their lives before everything happened, before he went north and she went south, he keeps coming back to that one particular memory. And he’s not allowed to remember it. Not ever.

“She’s your sister,” he thinks, but as her lips move while she’s telling him another story, he watches. The redness of them almost provocative, they look like she’s been biting them for the past few hours. It’s a mesmerising set of colours: her lips with a raspberry tint, screaming to be tasted, licked, devoured; her eyes, deep blue almost exactly like the ones that used to follow him with disdain when he was nothing more than a bastard boy, but there’s no disdain in Sansa’s eyes, only hope. Her fair complexion contrasts with the dark streaks of her auburn hair, almost brown in the dimly lit room. Jon quashes the need to cup Sansa’s cheek and stroke it with his fingers, to check if her soft, unwavering beauty isn’t only a product of his hallucinations. He wouldn’t dare.

—

Sansa enters the dining room when there’s barely anyone left. A few wildlings share a horn of ale, laughing. There’s also Edd sitting in the furthest, darkest corner, and he looks really down—Edd always looks down, that’s an inherent part of his personality, “The defining part”, Tormund insists, but Sansa doesn’t care, because Edd, albeit rather shy, is kind and caring, and that’s more than she could expect from a stranger. The wildlings terrify her still, she doesn’t know their customs, they’re far too loud and bold for her taste, so she chooses to cross the room and take a sit in front of Edd.

They don’t talk, there’s no need for it. Sansa eats her soup, wondering whether Jon has already eaten, and Edd just keeps staring at the ceiling. Weirdly, his silent presence comforts Sansa more than any words could.

When everybody leaves, Sansa reaches for Edd’s half-empty horn and moves her hand up and down its uneven surface. It’s become apparent these past few days that sleep refuses to come easily for her at Castle Black, and when she finally drifts off after hours of rolling over from side to side, her dreams are filled with memories—but are they real? Are they hers?

She doesn’t think about the Hound that often. He’s been a big part of her life when she was a prisoner in King’s Landing, but her fascination with his tragic story faded and went by long ago. She cannot remember his face anymore, only the scars, she doesn’t even know if she’d be glad to see him again. The memories of him and the torments from the Lannisters became too inseparable in her mind, and that’s why she doesn’t want to think of him or imagine their meeting.

Not now. Not ever.

Then why is her brain so set on bringing back the memory of the kiss? She can feel a sweet breath on her chin every morning when she wakes up from her blurry dreams—why is it sweet? Wasn’t the Hound monumentally drunk that night?—she can taste it, again and again. Her first kiss, that one thing she knows for sure. She’d gotten a few pecks from Joffrey, yes, they should probably count as first, but somehow it doesn’t feel right.

She closes her eyes and clasps her hands around the horn.

“I thought you weren’t fond of our ale,” Jon says, suddenly very close—how did he get so close without Sansa hearing his steps? Did she black out again?

“I heard it helps to forget.”

“It does,” his voice sounds worried, “for a while. It doesn’t make your past go away.”

Sansa raises her head and their eyes lock immediately as if they’re a couple of lovers always on a mission to find each other.

“For a while,” she repeats. “Sounds better than never.”

The ale tastes much worse than she remembered it—it’s bitter and stale, and reeks of old, damp barrels—but her lips don’t leave the edge of the horn until it’s empty. Jon’s eyes move to her throat as she swallows and stay there even after she’s finished.

At first, she doesn’t think anything’s changed—the same emptiness fills her, the same desperation—but minutes pass as they sit opposite one another in silence, and her head finally starts to feel both lighter and heavier, her thoughts stir inside her brain, but never fully form. It’s a bliss. It’s a curse.

She sits in the middle of a meadow, it’s late summer. The winds got chilly but she’s got a blanket around her arms. She’s knitted it herself. She’s content. She’s happy. She’s Queen Naerys Targaryen.

“Are you alright? That’s quite a lot of ale you just inhaled,” Jon murmurs, gently touching her arm. Sansa looks up and smiles at him.

“I’ll be fine,” she answers. “I’ll be fine, Jon. You can go to sleep, you look tired.”

He laughs hoarsely and it makes Sansa’s belly tighten.

“Not until I see you safely tucked under your furs.”

He approaches her with his back straight and a sword at his side. Where did he get that sword, she thinks briefly but continues to look at his beaming face.

“I’ve come to rescue you, my Queen.”

“You can’t, my love,” she says, remembering to dress her face in the deepest, most regal shade of sadness. “We’re bound to our fate forever. You’ve made your vows, as I have made mine.”

He kneels before her. He’s brave, he’s gentle, he’s strong. He’s Prince Aemon the Dragonknight.

Sansa tries to stand up all too quickly, her head spins violently and she has to hold on to the table to avoid falling. She can barely feel her legs and her arms—how strong was that ale?—but the burning hotness of Jon’s hand on her lower back, oh, that she feels.

“Careful,” he says, pulling her closer and throwing her arm around his neck. “You’re still much too weak to start drinking so heavily. Don’t let go, alright? I’m going to walk you to your chambers now.”

And he proceeds to do just that.

When Sansa lies in bed feeling truly sleepy for the first time since she’s reached Castle Black on her dying horse, she suddenly remembers everything.

His face is just inches away. He’s wearing his hair pulled tightly in the back like a true adult, but he’s been playing with swords all day and a few strands have escaped the knot, hanging loosely around his face. She feels the urge to curl one of them around her finger but before she decides to make a move, he leans in and kisses her on the lips.

It surprises her—the lightness of it as much as the act itself. “It’s not wrong as long as I’m Queen Naerys and he’s Prince Aemon,” she tells herself as she involuntarily moves closer and exhales into his warm mouth. His fingers wander up and down her sleeve, curious but never inappropriate. The kiss doesn’t last long, a few heartbeats maybe, but before it’s finished, she can hear him whisper: “Sansa.”

And instantly he’s Jon again, and she’s Sansa. And they’ve done something unforgivable.

—

Jon’s almost asleep when he hears banging at his door. He jumps out of bed and rushes to open it only to find a breathless Sansa on the other side. Her eyes are wide, and she looks absolutely terrified. If she’s still a bit in her cups, it doesn’t show.

“What happened?” he asks.

She’s shivering. He wants to put his hand on her arm but she jumps away.

“You kissed me,” she hisses, her tone accusatory.

Jon blinks. Not that he hasn’t thought of it, because of course he has. He won’t admit it to anyone but though he tried extremely hard to see his long-lost sister in the beauty that has brought him back to life, he failed miserably. The truth is—she was never a sister to him, not even before they parted ways.

“I assure you,” he answers quietly, “I did not. I didn’t even enter your chambers, I asked lady Brienne to help.”

“Not tonight,” Sansa sighs and Jon realises she’s standing before him barefoot, dressed only in some old sleeping gown, but somehow she’s never looked more queenly with her demanding expression and fiery glare. “When we were children. A few months before we left Winterfell. We played… we played, and you…”

And he kissed her.

He kissed her and he never regretted it once until she came to him, crying, and ordered him to forget it ever happened. He didn’t want to, it was too precious a memory, but he obliged. For Sansa.

“I thought we weren’t speaking of it,” he whispers carefully.

She was really shook when she came to him that day, he never wanted to see Sansa cry, and to be the reason for her despair—it was too much for him to bear.

“We aren’t. I just… I forgot.”

“You forgot?” he asks, feeling hurt. It was his only kiss before Ygritte and he wasn’t even allowed to savour that memory. How could she have forgotten?

“I’m sorry,” she says. “What we did… it was wrong. I didn’t… I couldn’t… I think I repressed it. I made myself believe it happened with someone else.” She lowers her head and he’s afraid to spook her by asking who that person was, but he’s certain it will haunt him forever. Was it Joffrey? Gods, he hopes it wasn’t him. Jon couldn’t bear it. Sansa makes a strangled noise at the back of her throat. “But I remember now.”

He doesn’t know what more to say, but Sansa doesn’t seem to expect any kind of explanation. It happened. It shouldn’t have, but it did. And it changed things between them.

Sansa finally dares to look at him. Her lips are parted, ready as they were in that meadow years ago. He doesn’t take advantage of her vulnerability. When they win back Winterfell, when the war is over—she will come to him of her own volition.

And he will have that second kiss, gods be damned.

#jonsa secret santa #jonsa fanfiction #jonsasecretsanta2018 #jonsa #jon x sansa #got #a gift for moonchildslife #secret santa #gift

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babie-janie · 7 years

Text

to the ones who love(d) me

1. you were my first “kiss” and it means nothing to me. i have been cruel to you but you have never been anything that i have wanted. i miss playing in the snow with you. we were innocent then. two very different worlds have shaped us. i am sorry. it is years later and i’m glad i’ve seen the person that you’ve become. i like to think that little me would be proud. in another life we are still friends. good luck.

2. my first everything. my first nothing. you will always reside in some part of my heart and i do not know if i want you to leave or not. sometimes you make tiny appearances in my life and i am grateful for them. however horrible you were to me cannot change the way i see you. from you i learned heartache, i learned it could mean two things. i was too young to understand either of them. we were a match made in heaven and burned in hell, i’ll always wonder if it were the opposite we could have known something more. you’re a beautiful, arrogant asshole, and i wish you the best of luck.

3. a waste. i was broken. beyond anything but desperate repair and so were you. how something so passionate came from that i’ll never know. i don’t regret it, i don’t cherish it. it was something that happened, and that was all it was ever meant to be.

4. we only knew a sad excuse for love, but you were a better person when we had it. thank you for cradling my pieces while you were still gentle.

5. i wasn’t special until i left you, and then you couldn’t get rid of me. we were always in love with eachother but never at the same time and i think that is how it is supposed to be. i would fall in love with you any day if you asked me but i think our distance is peaceful. it is years later and we are friends now. it’s nicer this way, but sometimes you still know how to tug at my heart strings.

6. you and i had all of the wrong timing and i promise you there is a world where i still love you. i’m sorry that i was unable to give you the world, i’m sorry for the person that you’ve become as a result. i hope you figure your heart out, but until you do, i am glad we are no more.

7. i thought we were worthwhile and for a time you were everything i loved. but falling out of love brought out a different part of you and i’ll never be able to see anything but that.

8. i cannot believe half of the things that we did, but i never wanted to love you. i’m sorry for breaking your heart but once i realized you weren’t the adventure i saw the first time we talked, i couldn’t stop thinking about leaving. freedom tastes sweeter than anything you could give me, but i hope that you can heal. it is several years later and i understand what you did to me. i hope you rot in hell.

9. you and i aren’t ever going to say it out loud but, this is the simplest form of two people loving each other. i don’t think i’ve ever wanted anybody more than i want you. watch wes anderson films with me while we make out under the stars and talk about a future we’ll never have.

10. you and i love each other and it’s not the kind of love you find easily. soulmates aren’t always meant to be romantic. it’s been a long time now and we have seen every side of each other. i hope we can find our way back to the good sides, in case we don’t, i love you.

11. Im sorry for everything weve done, everything I did to you. Im sorry that I was your first and that I left two days after. I cant make myself happy, I cant make you happy.

12. this is where you fit on the timeline of romance, but you and i have been in and out of love for years. our cycles are the single most painful thing i’ve been through, and i love you still. if we ever find our way back to eachother, know that we won’t ever work, but that i’d give anything for it to be different.

13. Who could have seen this coming? neither of us can hardly believe it. i fall easy for boys like you, but this time you’ve fallen too. i think there is a universal balance here, both of us infinitely collapsing into one another. for the first time you are the only one on my mind, and it is so refreshing. you are broken. i am trying. it isnt perfect. it doesn’t have to be. just stay with me. it is later now, and i have realized that you were never going to be the last one on this list. my heart aches for you and i hurt over how broken you are. i hope to god that you find your way. when i hear that you are unwell i shatter. you will always shatter me, but i hope we both heal.

14. is a good number to end on, it is your lucky number and it is double mine. maybe that’s how fate works. right now we are learning how to love and i’m glad that we found each other again. you have grown so much and i am trying to grow into goodness for you. never in a million years did i think that i would move across the country for someone, but here we are. i love you.

#love #poetry #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #love poems #boys #lost loved #in love #out of love #spilled poetry #writing #books i’ll never write

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