#there is no moral fucking purity in what the content is

[tippenfunkaport]

That viral post that's going around about how people who write "book quality" mlm fic are too "normal" to publish and have real jobs so only "weird" people publish their "shitty" fanfic is so completely out of touch with reality and I am giving a massive side eye to everyone reblogging it.

Not only is it completely, easily verifiably untrue (you cannot enter any professional writing space without tripping over a dozen grizzled scifi writers who got their start by filing off the serial numbers and publishing their Star Trek fanfic even going back decades ago??? it's a whole thing?? plus how can you look at the mlm category on Amazon right now and say with a straight face that people aren't publishing shitty Spirk and Stucky fanfic??? Oh, honey...) it's also the perfect example of this kind of sneering elitism that true artists would never sully themselves by seeking profit, they do it only for the purity of the thing that always somehow leads back to, "no one should be paid to make art, actually."

The only reason you're seeing more published fanfic right now has nothing to do with the idealistic purity of your hypothetical government employee written smut of the past vs the debased scribbles of those awful straights of today and everything to do with the fact that a) self-publishing has created a voracious readership that wants a ton of content so it's become a viable, flexible income stream for many, especially disabled people b) anyone can publish now with self-publishing tools so there are less gatekeepers and c) lockdown got a lot of people into fandom and therefore writing who never tried it before.

And if you really think there's no "shitty" published mlm and no "book-quality" m/f writing out there that started as fanfic, then you are clearly not a reader so why are you even talking about this?

#love how they manipulated people into spreading that post by making it seem like a cishet vs gay thing #when the real message is OP thinks trying to sell your writing is cringe and 'weird' and 'normal people' with jobs would never #which would of course never have flown on the fandom website #so they played into the queer shipping is purer than cishet shipping puriteen thing #and it worked! #because my god people are gullible #this is the direct pipeline that leads to AI thievery #''normal' people write for the joy of it anyway so why do you need pay? you are just greedy and 'weird'!' #'oh no this isn't about who we get to call cringe and who gets to profit from art it's about um... #(quick what's a hated m/f ship?).. oh uh 'shitty' REYLO #and not our super pure uh... (spirk is still popular right? lets throw in that avengers one too to make it seem timely) stucky!' #I'm sorry if I have no sense of humor about this but the year is 2024 and people are still way too ready to sneer #about writers trying to earn a fucking living in the shittiest timeline #and i need you to look deep into yourself and ask you why it's so important to you to tell yourself that only people writing what you like #are 'normal' with real jobs and to vilify everyone else as 'weird' and 'shitty' #for trying to make an income during a financial fucking crisis #i would say sorry for ranting about this but I'm not sorry because wtf #write whatever you want #publish whatever you want #there is no moral fucking purity in what the content is #and one thing certainly doesn't make you more 'weird' or 'normal' than the other #like there is soooo much shitty mlm that started as fanfic??? #that post is 100% OP made up some guys to get mad about and called them relyos for the clicks #writing #publishing #writblr #writeblr #i wasn't going to tag this anything but you know what fuck it I'm mad #i had like 5 more tags but tumblr cut me off which is fair 😅 #fan fiction

[vivika-ka]

Tik Tok One Piece fans are so fucking boring, losing their shit over ships.

“uuuh it’s not okay to ship Luffy with anyone, he is aroace.” (What the fuck kind of clownery is this take, btw)

“those characters never even interacted for more than 3 seconds, you have no business making fanart of them together.”

“any sanji x male ship is awful and illogical.”

“shipping luffy with anyone is illegal.”

“if I ever like any Lawlu content, shoot me in the head.”

Like, did they ever learn how to have fun? It’s fanfiction for a reason. It’s a headcanon for a reason.

Also, they’re out there being straight up homophobic at times, and showing how uneducated they are when it comes to Asexuality and Aromanticism…

It’s embarrassing how they’re riding moral purity so fucking hard under the guise of “social justice.”

And by the gods, it’s so god damn enraging that artists engaging in their hobbies, trying to have a good time while building their own space with people that share the same interests, are getting harassed by people that can’t do the bare minimum of separating fanfiction from the source material and separating fiction from reality.

#fandom #tik tok #fandom bullshit #tik tok bullshit #fandom ships #fandom criticism #one piece #one piece fandom #one piece ships #monkey d. luffy #luffy #op luffy #lawlu #sanji #zoro #zosan #the amount of hate I’ve seen for zosan is crazy #like hate whatever ship you want but do it in silence #the entire app is not solely for you #don’t even get me started on lawlu fans getting cyberbullied #adding a tag here to say that I refer to the aroace take antis have as clownery #because as I point out in the post antis have no clue of the spectrum asexuality and aromanticism possess

[coffeenonsense]

I usually try to stay in my lane most of the time (mostly bc I am far too old for fandom drama) but what the hell, it's friday, let's put that lit degree to use:

the way people are playing morality politics with fiction is really starting to genuinely irk me and I think some of the responses to ascended astarion are a perfect example of why this type of thinking is actually hugely detrimental to one's ability to meaningfully engage with fiction and also to the future of art.

astarion is one of the most well-written complex characters I've seen in recent years bar none (and I'm clearly not alone given the explosion of his personal fandom lol) and he has a truly compelling, emotionally resonant character arc whether you ascend him or not

If you keep him a spawn, you get a deeply touching, realistic character's journey to healing and personal growth where he learns who he is after the experience of his trauma and depending on the player's choice, explores his relationship to sex, romance and intimacy

If you ascend astarion, you get an equally emotional and well-rounded character arc where he chooses the power that allows him to have the desperate freedom and safety he's wanted, but in the process eschews any hope of real healing or personal development, and again, depending on the player's choices, restarts the cycle of abuse by taking cazador's place.

These options offer vastly different paths for the character and experiences for the player, but while yes, ascended astarion is the evil ending, and yes, ascending astarion is a tragedy, and a fucking incredible one (not only do you have astarion reigniting a circle of abuse but you have the narrative weight of KNOWING he could have actually overcome his trauma...hats off to the bg3 team tbh) but that does not mean ascending astarion MAKES YOU AS THE PLAYER EVIL

Ascend astarion because you love tragic story arcs, ascend him because you want to indulge in a master/slave vampire fantasy, don't ascend him because you want a healing character journey, don't ascend him because you want a sweet romance; all of these choices carry the same moral weight for the player, which is to say, none, because they are an exploration of fiction.

I know I'm saying this to the villain fucker website but it bears repeating; just because someone wants to engage with evil, fucked up characters or content does not mean they support evil acts in their real life, and furthermore, exploring dark, taboo or tragic concepts safely is part of what fiction is for. It enables us to look at those things from a distance, work through difficult feelings and develop greater understanding of what makes our fellow humans tick — and before you get it twisted there's also no moral issue with exploring fucked up media bc you're horny or just, because. You can take it as seriously (or as sexily) as you want.

It's starting to really concern me how many people not only do not get, but are violently opposed to this concept, because equating what someone likes in fiction with their real life moral code and actions is an incredibly dangerous and let's be honest, immature way of thinking that not only stunts your ability to engage with fiction but ironically, hampers your ability to deal with complicated issues and emotions in real life.

I don't know what's driving this trend (though purity culture is certainly playing a role) but it's definitely something that's not just impacting individuals but contributing to the commercialization of art, where we get games and stories and tv shows and books that regurgitate the same safe, mass marketable plotlines and character archetypes over and over and over again so corporations can squeeze out as much profit as possible.

Anyway, remember kids: There's no such thing as thought crime, reaching for morally pure unproblematic media is directly contributing to the death of art, and this is why funding the humanities is important.

#so...yeah #idk man i have thoughts and feelings #and i love astarion so much lol #astarion #ascended astarion #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #fandom analysis #media analysis #fiction #a personal rant because i need to vent about this and i just recalled i have a blog where i can indeed do so lol #astarion ancunin

[fangirltothefullest]

hey! i’ve seen you reblog a few posts from proshippers/posts tagged as proship and i just wanted to let you know in case its not on purpose!

I need some of you youngsters to please listen carefully to what I'm about to say because it might open your eyes to a very important concept- when I say ship and let ship I mean I don't give two fucks about what people read in fanfiction because it's all fake. Made up characters in a made up scenario with made up things happening.

Your christian-based concept that thought is equal to action isn't true. You can THINK whatever the hell you want do long as your actions don't cause a problem. A creepy old man can look at a young lady and THINK all the nasty things he wants. So long as he does not take those thoughts and turn them to actions, he's fine. He might want to go see a therapist but at the end of the day thoughts are just thoughts. Standing on the edge of a cliff and thinking "wow if someone pushed someone off this they'd die" doesn't mean you want to push someone off a cliff.

PLEASE separate the concept that thought and action are the same thing.

Even if the topic is a taboo topic, even if it's something you would never in a million years agree with, it's still fake at the end of the day.

I don't personally want to read about canibalism, but its not my job or my right to force other people to never write about that stuff. Policing other people's writing and policing the "goodness" or "badness" of the content they write is not my job and it's not anyone else's. Your morality is yours and yours alone. What you find taboo and never want to think about might just be a weird enjoyable read to someone else. Just like kinks or even random topics, you cannot cater to everyone and trying to force a moral purity in written fiction is just ailly. They're made up. No matter how much you want Azirphale and Crowly to be real no matter how much you are desperate for Percy Jackson to have real feelings, they aren't and he can't. They're not real and they never will be so nothing that happens to them, no matter how fucked up, really matters.

And that's all it is and all they will ever be. A bunch of taboo topics and events done to made up people.

I don't want to read about incest but I'm not going to stop people from writing fanfics about the supernatural brothers doing the nasty. I'm also not going to go out of my way to look for it or tell people to stop because it's all fake. Its not supporting it. It's made up pretend space.

I sit here throwing made up characters into Bad Situations that would be horrible if they were real people. But they're not. They're fake people with fake things happening to them and it's fun to write and fun to read. I torment my characters all the time. I made Virgil go through so much emotional trauma in APP and no one bats an eye because it's fake. Please apply the same critical thinking to the rest of written everything.

Proshipper literally means that a person should have the freedom to write what they want and read what they want because morality has nothing to do with fiction. It does not make you morally a bad person to enjoy a taboo subject in written form. This goes for ALL taboo subjects. People reading greusome murder mysteries don't go out and murder people. The same thing applies to the other taboo subjects. People writing about weird incest ships aren't going to go out and do the incest thing.

If they are it has nothing to do with the fiction and everything to do with that specific person.

Thought and action are not the same thing.

Allowing everyone to write what they want without gatekeeping based on morality is a good thing. We would not have lgbtqia+ stories if the morality policing of Christian values dictated what we are allowed and not allowed to write.

Please understand that I saying all this as a teaching tool. You might be super icked out by certain topics and that's natural and normal and ok. I am too! Everyone is! But what we have to do is be tolerant of the ideas that writing taboo subjects and being a proshipper isnt a bad thing. Also enjoying taboo subjects in written form doesn't make you somehow evil, ok?

[pearwaldorf]

we need to talk about Rahaeli

This is slightly tangential to the dumpster fire that is OTW, but it is something I think is important to also take into consideration.

If you're following the comments on the OTW announcement posts, you may have seen reference to Rahaeli (Twitter) aka synedochic (DW) aka Denise. She is a co-founder of Dreamwidth, where FFA is hosted.

Denise is a Fandom Elder, in both the descriptive and derogatory senses of the term. She's been around forever, since the pre-Livejournal days. She has no hesitations about throwing around that Fandom Elder status, in the same way somebody like Franzeska or astolat or anybody else in the clique that founded OTW would.

Perspective from older fans is absolutely valuable, I want to emphasize. You want people who were there to explain why we are concerned about restrictions on explicit/queer/legal but "morally objectionable" fanwork, or how younger fans embrace purity rhetoric. But it's different the way Fandom Elders wield it, the implicit assumption that because they are older and have Seen Some Shit, they automatically have some sort of wisdom to transmit to the young'uns.

Denise knows a great deal about social media moderation, anti-harassment measures, and the legal obligations surrounding the discovery of CSEM/CSAM* on sites you're responsible for administrating. That expertise is extremely valuable when explaining to people why/how everything with OTW is very very concerning.

She also knows fandom very well, and exactly how to calibrate her words to push buttons. I remember her meltdown about Cohost, another social media site that looked like a viable competitor to Dreamwidth at the time. Here is a summary of it I wrote at the time.

I'd like to get into criticism of the part of that Twitter thread where she throws a random non-sequitur into an already extremely long thread. (I know this is already a long post, please bear with me.)

At this point, she's gone on about OTW, their gross neglect of volunteers, Rebecca Tushnet, and a bunch of other stuff for like three or four screens. They are all things we should rightly be appalled by, so we're on her side for saying things that need to be said. We are probably also getting a little tired and not reading things as closely as we should. I think this is absolutely deliberate.

She then pivots the thread to EndOTWRacism (hereafter EOR) with what seems like an offhand comment about how she doesn't agree with their goals. She wrongly characterizes the end goal of EOR's campaign as a desire to moderate fic on AO3. This is patently false and is explicitly stated on their call for action under What Do We Want. They want AO3 to come up with anti-harassment policies and content policies for abusive and racist fics (what some people would characterize as troll fics), which are clearly written to degrade and harm fans of color**. We are not talking about fics with bigoted stereotypes or racist characterization.

EOR links heavily to work by Stitchmediamix, a well-known and outspoken Black anti-racist advocate in fandom. They write a column about race and fandom for Teen Vogue, and have been the target of incredible amounts of harassment. Denise thinks it's biased and kinda weird EOR does this.

The reason EOR relies so heavily on Stitch's work (and that of Dr. Rukmini Pande) is because very few people actually write about this stuff. It's horrible, thankless work that doesn't get you good attention but needs to be discussed anyways. (Acafandom, such as that which gets published in OTW's journal Transformative Works and Cultures, is racist as fuck, but that's a whole other topic.)

Here we see yet another impossible standard white fans are never held to, the one where non-white (but especially Black) fans must be ideologically pure with no lapses in temper or frustration. Whomst among us would be able to respond with perfect grace every single time they were set upon by racist mobs?

We depart from the Twitter thread here because Denise has made a statement on Dreamwidth about why she included all the stuff about Stitch when she was making a critique of EOR. The summary of the post is basically "A bunch of people told me stuff, I saw screenshots, but I won't even share redacted ones, so just trust me OK?"

I don't know Stitch (we have corresponded exactly once) or follow their work***, but I feel like if there were actual evidence they send harassment towards other fans surely it would have come up on FFA by now. The nonnies don't like them over there, and I suspect anything that proves they have actually done anything of the sort would be like throwing chum to piranhas.

Probably the most galling bit of Denise's post is this:

Under no circumstances should anyone use my writing, my own arguments, or my repetition of the concerns of the fans of color who have reached out to me, as an excuse to engage in racist harassment of Stitch or of anyone involved in the EndOTWRacism protest.

She knows exactly what she's doing. It's like dangling a steak in front of a hungry dog and telling it "Please don't lunge towards it because I'm telling you not to."

The second most galling bit is the way she, a white woman with a great deal of institutional power, justfies pointing even more racist harassment towards a Black fan known for continued anti-racist activism even though it makes their life hell and calls it solidarity.

Fuck that noise. As Dr. Pande says, there are many ways to discuss incidents like this without identifying individuals. Denise could have posted a person's account, in their own words, of their harassment experience. Even in an attempt to demonstrate faux solidarity she denies POC fans a voice.

I am glad Denise can contribute her technical and legal expertise to explaining precisely how the OTW has been negligent in their responsibilities to their volunteers and how they are noncompliant with important laws regarding extremely harmful material. I regret she has undermined this important work with unnecessary detours into racism and incitement of harassment.

I am extremely angry about having to make this post. It's another pile of shit on top of an already giant dumpster fire. But apparently upholding racism and white supremacy is still something people in fandom are going to do, even as an important organization within it burns down around our ears.

--

*There is a difference (cw: duh) between the terms! I did not know this until yesterday.

**I'm not getting into definitions or hair-splitting about this because it's not the point of this post.

***If you are interested in actually reading Stitch's work, here is a great place to start.

#otw fuckery 2023 #racism in fandom #otw #organization for transformative works #ao3 #archive of our own

[simplepotatofarmer]

some real talk from your local anarchist and activist:

one, as long as you've changed and worked/are working to be a better person, no one cares about your past! actual activists will work with former neo-nazis and kkk members because we want people to change. if they want to be better, we want to give them a place to go! so many people get stuck in the alt-right because they don't think they have anywhere else to go! but our goal as leftists is to reduce the numbers of the alt-right and so we welcome people that want to change because it's the only way to make the world better. constantly berating people with their past, making them self flagellate all the time, does nothing - nothing - to make the world better. this doesn't mean that people who have been harmed have to forgive them or feel comfortable but y'all white activists have no room to act like that!

two, fucking online discourse isn't activism. neither is retweeting threads on twitter or posts on tumblr. heck, this post isn't activism! you can do activism online but i promise you it isn't harassing fans of a creator or content you've deemed problematic or slur discourse or policing what memes people post. like sure, we should try to be aware of making others uncomfortable but holy crap these things really do not matter! you are not a good person solely because you consume things that are 'morally right'. consuming media is fucking NOTHING. it means NOTHING. yes, it can matter when it funds actual bigots like JKR but i promise watching steven universe or the dsmp or whatever literally doesn't matter.

please, drop this moral purity stuff and attacking other people over their pasts or what character they like because y'all are just doing the work of the alt-right for them! you're getting into slur discourse and kink discourse and attacking other queer people like, yeah! that's what they want! they want words like 'groomer' to mean nothing so it's easier to throw at anyone they want. they want 'queer is a slur' shit because putting people into strict labels makes it easier to say 'these are the good ones and these are the bad ones' later on.

people are good. people can change.

your kindness matters more than your righteousness ever will.

#loyal talks about stuff and things #anarchism #online activism

[kokobussy]

S P A C E   B O Y  -  Alien!Hyunjin x Human!Reader

summary: hyunjin is an alien and he fucks you. that’s it. that’s the story

warning: sexual content 18+, alien genitalia, anal play, drool/saliva stuff 

You still don't understand what you're dealing with, do you? Perfect organism. Its structural perfection is matched only by its hostility.

You admire it.

I admire its purity. A survivor, unclouded by conscience, remorse, or delusions of morality.

  “Are you unclouded by conscience, remorse,  or delusions of morality?”

  Hyunjin makes sure to take his time to answer your question. He’s almost too interested in the despair and downfall of Nostromo’s crew as they scramble to find a solution for the terrors that lie within the dark walls of their ship. As the movie keeps going trudging on in the background, haunting music and fear-filled voices bounce off the walls of your living room, you take the time to admire Hyunjin. 

  The way his hair frames his face neatly; the way the glitter across his face twinkles with each changing scene on the screen. The way his dark eyes flicker across the screen as more information is divulged. But once it’s clear to him that you won’t stop staring until your pestering has been answered, Hyunjin finally hums something like a response. “Hm?”

  “If you hurt me,” you begin again, rolling each word around your head thoughtfully,”would you feel guilty?”

For a moment, Hyunjin continues to be silent. The air around him is entirely still as he thinks on the question. He reaches for the remote slowly and takes his time to find and press the pause button. The television is frozen on an image of the Xenomorph looming above an unsuspecting crew member looking for his cat, Jonesy. The crew member, Brett, is unaware of the ultimate predator lying in wait for the kill.

  The silence is eerie and far too long for the question you’ve asked. His answer should be instant.

  Yes, I would feel guilty if I hurt you.

  Yes, it would make me upset to see you hurt.

  Of course, I would feel bad. Why would you say that?

  Any of these responses, or variations of them, should come out of his mouth effortlessly and immediately. 

A voices in your mind insists, nags even, that Hyunjin is different. Hyunjin contemplates everything as if he needs to envision himself doing the action in order to give you a satisfying answer. Those dark eyes remain eerily still as he thinks it over. His arm, casually resting against the arm of your couch now, forms a comfortable fist-shaped seat for his chin. There is no exertion in his movement, no flexing and relaxing of hard-working muscle, no strain as his body adjusts to involuntary and voluntary movement. Hyunjin’s body doesn’t heave and twitch with signs of life. As still as he is right now, as quiet as he is, Hyunjin could easily be mistaken for a picture or a drawing from someone’s imagination; an image frozen in time. 

  “I wouldn’t hurt you,” he says earnestly, eyes finally meeting yours from across the couch,”In fact, I do a lot to protect you.”

  Your stomach flutters at the admission.

  “Oh yeah,” you ask skeptically, praying that the amusement in your voice translates intergalactically,”And what do you do to protect me?” Although Hyunjin is an alien, you’ve done far more to protect him than he could ever to to protect you. The world is vast and dangerous and without proper care, there’s no way Hyunjin would be able to survive on his own. People, humans, are cruel. Never mind the elements, wild animals, and other things on the planet that could potentially kill him instantly.

  In the few months that he’s been here, you’ve given Hyunjin food, shelter, and an up-close view of earth he’s never had before. He has access to the internet, to books, to anything that a poor graduate student can offer him really. When you’re away at work, Hyunjin has access to your library of books and the slimy gaping maw that is the internet. In his short time here, he’s learned all kinds of differing languages, cultures, philosophies, and more from the quick taps of your keyboard to your sticker-covered monitor. It only took a day or two for him to fully communicate with you. Although there are still terms and colloquialisms that he doesn’t fully understand, the two of you can speak pretty well.

  Your heart does warm at the idea of Hyunjin wanting to protect you in some way. As the weeks have passed, the two of you have gotten about as close as you can to an alien in this situation. Although his statement of protection is comforting and a sign of friendship, the butterflies in your stomach don’t settle at the implications. 

Hyunjin isn’t like you, not in the slightest. He probably wasn’t protecting you from your creepy professor or bitchy roommates. Could there be dangerous alien plots waiting to ensnare you? Are there other-worldly visitors that roam the earth alongside him? Visitors that want to cause you and other people of earth harm? Is it some sort of venom that Hyunjin spews out on occasion? What is he protecting you from? 

  It’s his turn to let out a huff of amused air before giving you a pointed look as if the answer is right there in front of you, obvious and true. 

  “Well, for one thing,” Hyunjin says with a strange calmness,” this isn’t my real appearance. Do you think my people look like this naturally?”

  A breeze flows through you, raising the hairs on the back of your neck and making them prick and tighten. As you look over at Hyunjin on your couch, a spell suddenly breaks and you realize that it is true. You don’t know what he looks like underneath this...disguise.

  Hyunjin could look like one of the Greys underneath his glittery flesh suit. He could have large beady black eyes and pincers near his mouth that rip and tear. He could have eyes on the side of his head that turn inwards when he blinks or drifts off to sleep. Hyunjin could be an unfathomable being that would make your head explode if you laid your eyes on him. 

  Hyunjin is an alien and certainly not international pop star, Hwang. Hyunjin is someone else, something else, wearing a clever disguise. As you look over his features and try your hardest not to show the fear broiling inside you, a seed of doubt in your stomach now burrows its way into the very soil of you. 

  Hoping humor is something that all distant life forms can understand, you squint your eyes in mock suspicion and hope that the fear that’s beginning to blossom inside of you is completely hidden. You hear a voice that sounds exactly like yours ask,“What do you normally look like?” 

  Hyunjin’s resulting smile is every bit as patronizing and irritating as it feels. “That’s what I’m protecting you from,” he laughs lightly,”Humans are...delicate. They can barely handle variations in their own species. How would they react to something not of this world?”

  As you look at Hyunjin, a sleep-addled memory begins to play behind your eyes. A memory that makes you think about when Hyunjin occasionally does strange things. Like when his mouth opens too wide to eat handfuls of Cheerios or some days when he spends a little too long in the shower and somehow releases a weird iridescent goo all over your bathroom; each goo accident results in a sheepish Hyunjin coming to ask for assistance. 

  This strange memory occurs when you’re asleep in your room and are abruptly woken up by a series of clicks assaulting your ears from beyond your window. You never remember how or when the figure got inside your bedroom. You only remember the paralysis, the way your body seemed unwilling to move as you watched the creature crawl toward your desk. No matter how much you willed yourself awake, to move, you remained frozen in your bed.

  But, really, what would you have done? What would have happened if you turned on the light and faced the creature in that moment? What would actually seeing this creature in the light do to make the situation better or worse?

  Then your memory reveals the horror, the fear, of the creature standing to full height, tall and imposing over your desk. It stared at the textbooks you’d left on your desk earlier that night and thumbed through the pages rapidly. It shuttered, twitched, chittered, and moved jerkily as it flipped through each page of your study guide to Human Anatomy & Physiology 2.

  Then it happened. 

  The part that you will always remember clearly. 

  The dark creature stopped what it was doing and looked up at the poster of Hwang hanging above your desk. It spent some time staring at the poster of Hwang’s blonde hair, his dark roots, the elaborate angle he hung his body, and probably even the glitter dancing across his nose and cheeks. Then a series of clicks and chitters filled the room along with the snapping and twisting of limbs that you’d only ever heard in movies. A particularly harsh snap caused a miserable groan to spill from its lips. It was a sound that Hyunjin hasn’t emitted since. 

  The memory ends with you inevitably turning on the light and seeing the ends of twin dark pointed tentacles just disappearing into either side of the pale creature’s back. It heaved a deep sigh of finality, shoulders relaxing and chest heaving. As the creature took its time to relax, to calm, you could see the sudden protrusion of human-like knobs appearing in a line on his back, one after the other. A spine, you brain supplies, a human spine. 

  “What the fuck are you doing in my room,” you asked, no screamed, hysterically. The creature turned around promptly at the sound and there was Hwang staring back at you, eyes wide.

  You screamed. Obviously.

  Over the course of more screaming, more accusations, and more general confusion, you soon realized that it was not international popstar Hwang standing naked in your bedroom after scaling your apartment building. It was a traveler from a distant star. With the resemblance being nearly uncanny, if not identical, you named him Hyunjin.

  Remembering his disregard from a few moments ago, a scoff passes through your lips. You may be afraid but there’s no way you would give up an opportunity like this. Puffing out your chest, you counter the insinuation,”But I’m—“ 

  “Different?” He supplies,” I don’t think you’re that different from other humans.”

  Whether it’s his mentality after interacting with you and your roommates or an assumption, you’re not really sure. The small bleed in his statement makes another thought cross your mind. Another thought that leaves you a little more unsure than before. 

  Does he know other humans, you thought, am I really the first one he’s ever encountered? 

  But then the reality of a lie comes to your attention as you think of the unlikely. Is he lying? Could this all be some long-lasting joke that a friend is pulling on you? Wanting to see how many ridiculous antics you’ll put up with until you break. Despite this thought, an impending sense of...something haunts you. Glancing briefly at the television screen, you wonder just how similar you are to Brett. Are you unaware of the threat hovering about your head?

  Although fear thrums through your veins, you need to know what lies underneath its flesh suit. “I promise I won’t freak out,” you nod, moving closer to Hyunjin on the couch. You’re so close now that you can feel the coolness of his skin reach for yours. 

  “Promise?” he parrots, tilting his head in confusion.

  You try to explain the word without using the word in question,”It’s like a swear.” When the furrow in his brow doesn’t disappear, you try again,”I don’t know...a bond through words? Between people?” 

  Instead of answering in a language you know or have heard of, Hyunjin chitters in response and adds a hard click for punctuation. By the tone, you can only assume that this is his attempt at some equivalent for the word, ‘promise’. 

  Sighing, you lean forward and squish the pale orbs of his face. For a moment the alien flinches in your hold and just barely keeps himself from grabbing onto your wrist. You can’t ignore the flash of distrust in his eyes or the way his hands fall back into his lap. “Hyunjin,” you stare at him,”you know I don’t know what that means.” The sight of his lips pursing as he stares at you brings a smile to your face. Hyunjin keeps staring at you, confusion evident as he wraps his hands around your wrists.

  You hold him there for a moment, admiring the softness of his cheeks, until his eyes begin to harden. Letting go instantly, Hyunjin wiggles off the feeling of your hands on him before settling on the couch again. “If you ‘promise’ not to panic,” he starts tentatively,”I’ll show you some things.” Instantly, your cheeks stretch with the fierceness of your grin. The fact that you’ve somehow convinced Hyunjin to trust you in this way makes you more excited than anything else. The sight of your happiness, your excitement, makes him try to backtrack. “ Not everything,” he insists,” Not all at once.” You continue grinning, but now a slight bounce has accompanied your happy demeanor. He almost can’t stand the sight of it.” Just enough that you’ll leave me alone,” I want to get back to this movie. The Xenomorph is starting to kill the humans.”

  The sight of his smile now has yours falling. Was Alien the right choice for movie night?

  Rolling his shoulders with a sigh, Hyunjin maneuvers himself to face you fully on the couch. He folds his legs and tucks his feet neatly as his hands land on his knees. His eyes wander the planes of your face before settling on your eyes. A shiver runs through you at the closeness of him. You’re not sure why Hyunjin is always cold. No matter how many layers of clothing you gave him or blanket burritos you’ve wrapped him in, the strange being always ran cold. Something tells you to lean in closer to Hyunjin, to really look at how much effort he’s put into the guise before revealing his true self. When you do your hands instinctively land on the meat of his thighs for balance. 

  Hyunjin does flinch this time, the feeling of your warm fingers in such a delicate place, before settling back into his seat. This close you can see the way his eyes remain entirely still. When he looks about your face, his eyes don’t move to take in each frame. Hyunjin seems to be taking in everything at once. You can also see the larger than ‘normal’ pupil looking back at you; the size of a nickel if you think about it. The poster of Hwang can only bring so many of his features to light. Maybe the pupil size was just...hard to see. Or maybe this is one of the many things that Hyunjin wants to show to you. 

  There’s a flutter in your stomach again, but it’s different than before. Something about the flutter this time, the particular fury of butterflies flapping against your viscera, and the slight acidity in your mouth reminds you that this isn’t worry. This isn’t about displeasing an attractive person or embarrassing yourself in front of your crush. This is fear. 

  Hyunjin is not actually Hyunjin. It’s a name that you gave to the alien in front of you because you couldn’t pronounce his real now. Now that reality has crashed your parade, you can only imagine what he actually has hidden beneath the thin pale skin that covers his body. You can only imagine what horrors beyond your compression that lie within the bones of it. You have no idea what he looks like underneath it all, what horrors he had to hide that made him hiss and grunt as he shifted; if his skin is even really skin or if the paler tone is his true color. All you can do is adjust yourself on the couch, your legs touching his, and prepare for the inevitable,”I’m ready.”

  No, you’re not ready, but he doesn’t need to know. 

  There is no ceremonious noise that signals when Hyunjin will begin. With his concentration and your near-vibrating excitement, your apartment is entirely silent. Your roommates are gone for the weekend, away from this place of potential danger. Your private reveal party has seemingly no potential disturbances or possibility of interruptions. But there’s also nothing to save you in case things get far too scary, too fast. When Hyunjin’s lips begin to start and reveal the whites of his now sharpened canines, you realize just how alone you truly are.

  Along with his canines, the rest of his teeth now form into perfectly edged points that sit perfectly behind his lips. If he wanted to, Hyunjin could probably tear through the toughest of flesh with those fangs. “Last chance,” Hyunjin says with disinterest and just a hint of warning, now his lips curl into a smile that reveal full rows of sharp white bone. Even though he could probably chomp through all of your bones, your fingers remain on his thighs. There is still some hesitance in his eyes as Hyunjin looks at you; like he doesn’t want to hurt you or scare you in any real way. It’s that hesitance, that human emotion, that keeps you trusting him. Sort of. 

  Just as you gather slightly more courage, it begins to sour again as your brain finally processes the small moment. “Did you,” you start, eyes falling to the pink of his lips,”...your lips didn’t move.”

  “What?” he asks dumbly, blinking owlishly at your reaction. 

  His lips remain still, unmoving.

  Tension falls over you as the fluttering feeling in your stomach crawls up into your neck, one of those many butterflies crawls its way into your throat and spreads its large voluptuous wings, choking the wet flesh there. There’s a sort of ache somewhere on your head like the pulling and healing of skin; like the life cycle of a scab in the matter of seconds. It happens so suddenly, so abruptly, that you ignore it. You’re still overcome with the shock of Hyunjin’s ability to speak without moving his mouth.

  “Oh my god,” you gasp, staring at his lips,”so you’ve been moving your lips all this time for what? For show?”

  Now, as he continues to prepare himself to reveal some of his inner workings, you find that the fleshy lips on his face do not move; like a mask. If you thought back on it now, you would note the delay in his speech; how it took time for his mouth to catch up with his words. Maybe his kind didn’t have lips. Almost all of Hyunjin is fabricated. His hair, his eyes, his smile, his brow, the glitter dancing across his nose, everything is an exact replica of your poster. The only thing that differentiates him from the real Hwang is his mannerisms. Like the way he forgets to blink, his inability to handle fluorescent lights, his unmoving nature.

  Who is the real Hyunjin?

  What is his real name?

  Does he mean harm?

  “Focus,” Hyunjin groans in annoyance, like he has somewhere better to be,”this is your last chance. I’d rather not deal with the consequences of this, but you keep asking. No matter what you say, things aren’t going to return to how it was before.”

  “Okay, okay. I’m ready. I promise. No more interruptions.”

  Hyunjin makes sure to roll his eyes again so you feel every bit of annoyed energy flowing off of him. This time though, you can see a slight delay when he blinks. It seems like something moves over his eyes briefly and with a shiver you suddenly realize what it is. A translucent lid falls away into the abyss of his dark brown eye. Eyebrows furrowing, you think of your Hwang posters upstairs and wonder just how much of his form is pretend. There’s no way he can hide all of his extraterrestrial features. The huge pupils are the perfect example of that.

  Finally, once you’re quiet enough for his liking, Hyunjin’s mouth opens. Out of the dark abyss, a long appendage reveals itself. You’ve seen it plenty of times when he ate or talked, but it always resembled the soft pink tongue that mammals tended to have. That almost all living things on earth tended to have; but Hyunjin isn’t from this earth.

  The appendage is blue when it reveals itself, blue and flat. There are no slight involuntary twitches as it reveals itself further and further. His “tongue” continues its descent, remaining entirely still as if every single muscle is under his control. And maybe it is. Hyunjin’s tongue petals at the end into a softened flat point that curls downward slightly.

  It’s definitely...different.

It’s also definitely fairly long, but not so horrific that you wouldn’t be able to sleep at night at the thought of it. In fact, the longer you look at it, the cuter it is. The sight of his tongue hanging out of his mouth, blue as can be, makes you smile and mimic the being before you. A huff of amused air leaves Hyunjin’s body as he watches you. Seeing that you’re comfortable enough to be silly, he takes it as a sign to continue. 

  Slowly but surely more blue is revealed and along with its length, small bumps begin to show on the now wider sides of his tongue. It continues all the way down, never stopping or speeding up, until it reaches the middle of his chest. The pads of your fingers flex against his thigh as you try your hardest not to gasp. It takes everything in you to school your expression so he doesn’t hide away; so he doesn’t think that you can’t handle it. You want to know what he really is. At the same time though, your stomach begins to burn slightly at the sight of it. 

  How did he hide this in his mouth for this long? 

  You try to remember that he’s still the same Hyunjin you dragged to “human” museums to admire art. He’s still the same Hyunjin who hates the harsh coldness of ice cream and adores the flavor of coffee; who loves pizza without cheese. 

  Yes, you’ve explained to him that that’s just bread with sauce. No, he doesn’t care and still calls it pizza. He’s still the same Hyunjin who’s been living in your apartment for a month now. 

  He just has a really really really long blue tongue. 

  Suddenly Hyunjin begins to move that tongue. This close to him still it’s easy for the blue appendage to reach you easily. It flicks against the rough pink tip of your own tongue before wrapping around it. Despite its odd dry appearance and strange softness, Hyunjin’s tongue is entirely wet. His saliva seems... thicker. Rather than a noticeable sheen that covers the organ, you can clearly feel the glob of fluid on your tongue. It’s only then that you remember you’re still sticking your fucking tongue out. 

  Then he folds it back into the seemingly bottomless cavern that is his mouth. There’s a minute before you slip yours back into your mouth too. Your nerves make your mouth prick with saliva. You swallow repeatedly, ignoring the small lump in your throat. 

  “Well?” Hyunjin asks carefully, looking about your face for any sign of distress. 

  Despite the uneasiness you still feel, the very idea of witnessing a real life alien right before your eyes trumps it. Hyunjin really is an otherwordly thing and not some creep who’s been bullshitting this entire time. You lean back against your couch now, somewhat relaxed at having everything confirmed right in front of you,”That’s fucking amazing, dude.”

  Hyunjin laughs and runs his fingers through his hair,”I’m glad you like it. One less thing I have to keep up.” With that his blue tongue slips out again through his plush lips and wets the surrounding flesh before slipping back inside. He turns towards the television without anothe word.  Turning the movie back on, Hyunjin doesn’t spare you a second glance as the story progresses. As the film continues, you can’t help but think about just how long he has to keep up this appearance. 

  Every day. 

  Every single day. 

  Every moment of every day spent in a form that isn’t his. 

  You’ve seen Hyunjin stare at himself in reflective surfaces as if spooked by the person he sees.

  It must be exhausting.

  As the movie continues, the Xenomorph opens its mouth wide, saliva and acid careening out of its mouth as it prepares to demolish its new host. The open mouth reveals a smaller deadlier mouth that takes chunks out of one of the characters. With only two other passengers of the Nostromo left, it’s up to Ripley to save herself and Jonesy from certain death. Your eyes wander back over to Hyunjin who’s now sprawling out on the couch and mumbling something under his breath; something like “they almost got it right”. Instead of asking about whether it’s the killing instinct of the Xenomorph or its particularly large bulbous head, your eyes roam over Hyunjin’s lithe frame. Although he’s referenced your anatomy textbook when he first shape-shifted and the Hwang poster for further analysis, Hyunjin couldn’t have gotten everything right. 

  There’s only so much that pictures could do. Although he did seem to get the rest of Hwang correct, there were some things that were off. His glittery sheen that lines his cheeks and nose is the same as in the picture of Hwang and its presence is a constant reminder that Hyunjin doesn’t know what makeup really is. He doesn’t know that it’s a decoration, something you can wipe off and apply at will. But Hyunjin is still Hwang and therefore still beautiful in your eyes. Although he wears Hwang like a mask, Hyunjin’s otherworldly beauty comes through in the way that e carries himself through the house. In the way that he wraps his arms around you in an attempt to show affection, to show thanks. You don’t need to look up at the posters in your room to remember that Hyunjin is not really Hwang; that he is not human. Despite all of this, you still find yourself desiring him in some way. He’s gentle when he wants to be and adorably curious. The longer you stare at him, admire him, the more you feel desire burning its way into your skin. Everything feels just slightly too tight. The inside of your flesh feels wet and sticky as beads of sweat start to bubble on your hairline and back of your neck. When did it get so hot in here?

  “Where are you going?”

  As the credits begin to peek on the screen, you find yourself getting up and heading upstairs. The longer you stay here, the hotter you seem to become. You can feel the way your shirt sticks to your skin as you look at Hyunjin’s unassuming face. God he’s so hot. “Upstairs,” you answer breathlessly, noting the way Hyunjin’s collar bones shine in the light. An ache courses through your body; starting from the cloying heat of your stomach to the dull throb of your hole. You clench your thighs together and mumble something like a,”Good night.” But Hyunjin isn’t interested in your good nights. His eyes stay on your thighs, watching the way the flex occasionally as he stares. The heat builds into something ridiculous, something impossible to ignore, and without another word you head to your room. 

  That heat persisted well into the next morning. The heat was and is unyielding, pulling and clawing at your insides as it demanded touch. This need for touch couldn’t be quelled by a platonic hug between friends, but it also couldn’t be quelled by nearly buzzing your clit off three times. That heat, that need for touch, stayed between your thighs and only grew more viciously throughout the day. By the time you got home, you were a mess. With each step further into your apartment, the soaked fabric of your panties squish and squelch against you. You feel sticky, overheated, like your skin simply couldn’t calm down no matter how hard you tried. Although you remember breaking out your vibrator earlier and relieving yourself, you’re almost certain you can go again. The only thing that seems to calm your nerves, to cool off your body, seems to be jacking off.

    You take determined steps to your bedroom and when you walk inside, excitement bubbling in your belly, you see Hyunjin lying across your bed. Legs sprawling out on the fabric, feet kicking slowly in the air, he reads impossibly fast through thick pages. As he lays there, you notice the way your shirt hangs off of one of his shoulders and the cloth shorts he’s also taken from your closet that hangs loosely around his waist and thighs. 

  Now you’ve been around beautiful people before, but there’s something about Hyunjin here and now that makes you itch. The air about your stirs with something thick that fills every breath you take. 

  You’ve been around beautiful people before, but there’s something about Hyunjin here and now that makes you itch. The air about you stirs with something thick that fills every breath you take. It smells like the largest of flowers; impossible structures that curl and dominate the space they’re in. It’s a floral scent that demands to be known, that brings a haziness to your mind. It makes your mind wanders to last night. To the feeling of his cool skin on yours and the feeling of that blue tongue wrapping around your pink tongue. What would it feel like between your legs lapping at the nectar between your thighs? What would his large fingers feel like as they rub and dig and claw at your walls? How would he sound as he came? Would he roar in your ear? Would he bear his sharp canines and grunt with each loud wet slap against your skin? 

  Hyunjin’s rolling onto his back before you can catch your bearings and sits up in bed to stare at your new presence in the room. The shorts have ridden up and reveal more of his pale thighs than before. Your thighs clench and unclench as you try your hardest to ignore the wetness in your pants. The denim of your jeans catches against the tacky fabric as you search for some sort of relief fro the unending pressure that pushes against your hole and presses into your clit. All you can the wet in your pants; to search for some sort of relief from the unending pressure that pushes against your hole and presses against your clit. All you can think of is owning Hyunjin, of riding his face and the length of his tongue until you’re creaming all over his face. Maybe his cum is thick. Maybe it’s blue. Maybe it’ll cling to your throat as you swallow each warm rope of cum while his cock pulses in your mou— 

  When he looks over at you, his initial annoyance at the distraction seems to fade in an instant. Suddenly his dark eyes show something like concern. “Hey,” he says softly, leaning in to get a better look at you,”are you okay?” You begin to peel off your jacket and hang the tired article over your door. As you walk about the room, gathering comfy clothes to change into, you can’t help but notice the intensifying floral smell. This close to the alien, he smells...different. His scent smells something like a flower, like heady pollen cloying heavily behind your nose. It’s all-consuming; overwhelming in a way that you can’t really fathom.

  The heat has become unbearable the longer he’s in the room; or that you’re in the room with him. You’re not entirely sure why this is happening. In the heat of pollen, wet and the dull ache between your legs, you feel his large hand cup your moist cheek. You didn’t even process Hyunjin rising from the bed and coming towards you. Just how out of it are you? What’s happening?

  You move away from his hold and make your way towards the kitchen, determined. You grab at a water bottle in the fridge and chug the liquid immediately. Water soaks droplets into your shirt as you drink furiously. It’s only when Hyunjin pulls the bottle away and presses his large hand against your cheek again that you come out of your haze. “Hyunjin?” you ask, or at least try to, and lean into the cold palm of his hand. The coolness of his flesh lures you to a sense of awareness, but not fully. Not like before. Something has changed. 

  “I feel weird,” you whisper, fingers reaching out to smooth the worried lines on his face. The ever-present glitter there remains undisturbed. Despite your maneuvers, Hyunjin’s eyebrows furrow further. “What do you mean ‘weird’ ?”

  In addition to that ache, there’s a longing deep within your bones. It’s a kind of needling, an uncomfortable feeling that turns and twists in your stomach. Honey cloys and weighs at the back of your throat as you lean closer into Hyunjin’s hold. 

  His dark eyes wander around your face, landing somewhere above your eyes. His nostrils flare as he whispers, “You smell different.”. That cloying smell clings to your nose as you try to blink your way out of this strange haze. It’s still too warm and just a hint of too much, but you’re able to deal now; to understand. Your mouth is too full of moisture. You think back to what could’ve done this and find nothing out of the ordinary. But then you remember the brushing of tongues yesterday and swallowing something too thick, too viscous to be normal spit. “Did you do something to me?” He tilts his head and watches you move away from him slightly. The distance you’ve put between each other does nothing to calm the longing. You think about all the times you’ve touched him in the past. There were casual touches, the occasional hug, but they never caused whatever this was.

  “Am I dying?” you ask frantically, staring into his huge eyes,”Are you killing me right now? What the fuck, dude? Not cool!”

  “Relax. If I killed you, where would I stay?”

  “You’d take over my body and live as me,” you say as a matter of factly,”Obviously.”

  “I can’t ‘take over’ your body. I can look like people but I can’t be them.”

  “Then what’s happening?”

  It happens so suddenly, so abruptly, that you can’t slap his hand away. Even after it happens, you can only sit there in shock and disbelief. The only confirmation that you have is the firm pressure of the thing, the taste of salt and flowers, and the slight pain of it all. Hyunjin leans in closer and pulls slightly, ignoring the way your hands grip his wrist in protest.

  My tongue can’t go as far as yours, you think, you’ll rip it out. 

  “I’m not going to pull anymore,” he says aloud,”but you have to trust...”

  He seems to find whatever he’s looking for almost immediately. His eyes widen briefly before taking an impossibly closer look. You can feel the brunt of his nail almost piercing the tip of your tongue in an attempt to hold it down. Ouch. 

  “Sorry,” he mumbles. When he finally pulls his fingers off and out of your mouth, a thick blue substance follows after him. He tries to shake it off but the blue-tinged substance sticks stubbornly before smearing it into the arm of your couch. The sight of it makes the sticky feeling in your mouth that much more apparent. Each swallow takes effort and for a moment you think you’re choking.

  “What is that—”

   “I don’t know.”

  “Am I dying? You spat in my mouth and now I’m dying?”

  “Hey! I didn’t spit in your mouth.”

  “Hyunjin, something is wrong.”

  “I know,” he starts, glaring at you now,”you smell different and your eyes are...dilated.”

  That makes you take pause. Instead of arguing with him further, you try to think about the state of your body. This close to him you can barely think. You would’ve remembered Hyunjin smelling like flowers in bloom. So why does he smell different now? Why do you feel so warm? Why are you sweating through your clothes? What is that blue stuff on your tongue?

  Maybe out of nervousness or habit, Hyunjin licks his lips that you’re met with the blue tongue from earlier. Then you think of his touch, the feeling of it, and find yourself frowning.

  “Have you always smelled like flowers?”

  Now it’s Hyunjin’s turn to frown.

  “No...that only happens during mating cycles.”

  “Mating? Like animals?”

  “That’s the closest word for it in your language. I smell like flowers?”

  “Yes.”

  “How can you smell that?

  “That must mean we’re compatible.”

  It’s strange how these words, how their meaning, make your heart race; makes your hole clench around nothing. “You smell different too,” Hyunjin admits shyly, fingers finding your waist,”you smell really good.” 

  Those fingers around your waist cool the unbearable burning in your bones. You find yourself wanting more of it; wanting to finally be cooled off. Would it be so bad to indulge? Hyunjin might be different, but he still looks like Hwang. He still sounds like Hwang. What could the harm be? 

  You don’t really think about the possibility of Hyunjin not being right. Is the possibility of his touch, his wet, killing you worth it? He’s never been to earth after all. He’s never seen humans before so he probably hasn’t been with them in a sexual way. 

  You choose to accept it, to not think as the hazy feeling from before engulfs you yet again. Finally, you lean into the being as much as you can, nearly moaning at the coolness of his skin, and hold onto his wide shoulders. Hyunjin stares at your eyes with a light of interest and asks,”What now?”

  Your thumbs rub the cool skin of shoulders, noting the bones within them, and ask,

  “Do aliens kiss?”

  His answer is instant and filled with confusion,“What’s a ‘kiss’ ?”

  Your first kiss with Hyunjin is awkward. 

  His plush lips don’t move. His hands stay on your waist, unmoving. It’s almost like kissing a statue. When you open your eyes in the middle of it, the alien is already staring back at you. At the sight of those dark brown eyes searing back at you, you finally pull away unsatisfied. Hyunjin just smiles almost politely as he says,”that was nice.”

  Exasperation flows through you as you counter quickly,”That wasn’t...a real kiss, Hyunjin.” He doesn’t respond or really listen to the instructions you’ve taken it upon yourself to explain. Instead Hyunjin’s hands finally begin to wander your body. He squeezes and holds any part of your flesh that will yield to his hands. Your tops and bottoms of your ass, the flesh of your back, your arms, all blessed with gentle touches under his strange ministrations.

  “Are you paying attention?” you ask suddenly, fingers moving down to hold onto his biceps. “No,” he answers curtly, as if a decision has finally been made,”we have something like a kiss, but it’s...a little more involved.” That piques your interest. Hyunjin presses you against the harsh countertop of your kitchen and finds his way between your legs. Fingers settling on your spread thighs and a grin making its way onto his features, he tilts his head and says,”Trust me.”

  In an instant Hyunjin’s long tongue reveals itself and carefully licks the side of your face. His saliva leaves a sticky residue that’s around the same thickness you felt in your throat yesterday. That thin tongue, long and fluttering, makes its way down to your neck. The soft licks tickle your skin and have an inquisitive air about them. Your hands find the fabric of his shirt and cling to the soft sides underneath, anchoring yourself there. There’s an uncomfortable heat that crawls from the surface of your skin into the depths of your flesh. Each touch, each strange lick, makes your skin burn with an odd sensitivity.

  His tongue seems to taste your skin. There are no shudders of joy as he continues his ministrations; no gasps of pleasure as he hovers above your body. As he presses plush lips against your skin, a small gasp claws its way out of your throat. Maybe he needs guidance. How could he know anything about the human body really; about where to pull pleasure from?

“This feels nice,” you say quietly,”really nice.” You feel those lips form into a kind of smile against your skin. A breath of laughter cools the blue dollop of saliva on your skin as Hyunjin smiles against you. Your fingers run through his hair gently, noting the way the strands stiffen in your hold. “Can you lick—”

  Pain.

  Searing, never-ending pain, spreads across the expanse of your neck. The feeling of thin burning wetness and thick liquid pooling onto the cushion underneath you; a warm splash on your shoulder. All you can do is grunt and open your mouth in a silent scream as Hyunjin’s sharp teeth burrow their way into your neck. Your hold on his body turns into a desperate grip as you cry out finally.

  “H-hyunjin! Stop!”

  But before your brain can truly process the pain, the fact that Hyunjin has wounded you fiercely and unexpectedly like a rabid dog, the fire begins to dull again. With a slight tilt of his head, his teeth sink further into your skin and while you feel that warm wetness, that rush of blood rising to the surface, you also feel your toes curl, your back arch, and a flutter in your stomach.

  There’s pleasure battling that pain now, taming it into something strange yet manageable.

  “Sorry,” he mumbles moves away from the sensitive flesh. The reality of his action is clear as day as he wipes the mess of blue and red from his face, the now purple substance stains his shorts; maybe even the kitchen floor. When your finger tips reach to that bite, you find your blood frozen in time. It doesn’t flow faster or slower, it just simply stops moving altogether. As your fingers touch each puncture in your skin those teeth left behind, each perfectly pointed hole, that same pleasure rises again. “What did you do?” you whisper, eyes widening and then narrowing in confusion. Hyunjin’s tongue peeks out to lick the remaining fluid as he answers,”It’s... what we do. Like your ‘kiss’ ”.

  Despite how badly you want to feel the mark, to assess the damage of what he’s done, you can no longer disregard the deep ache between your legs; the longing that sits deep in the pit of your stomach. Your clothes come off clumsily and land somewhere on the living room floor. Now emboldened Hyunjin’s hands slip underneath the fabric of your shirt. His eyes widen in awe at the feeling as if feeling your skin for the first time. 

  When you pull off your shirt and toss it somewhere in the corner, you realize that it is the first time he’s ever seen you naked. His fingers dance across your tan skin and trace each scar, each freckle, each mark, each stretch mark that litters your skin —  that makes you human — in marvelous wonder. “You smell different now,” Hyunjin whispers,”sweeter.”

  As you pull down your pants and rid yourself of the tacky fabric of your underwear, you wonder if he’s going to mark other areas with his bite and blue fluids. You want him to desperately. More than the fact that he looks like Hwang is your curiosity; your desire and want. What will it feel like? Will it all be pleasure pain? You need to know. Only when you’re naked in front of him does Hyunjin remove his open shirt to reveal a very human torso. 

  “Here,” you mumble, brushing your fingers along the top of your chest,”bite here.” Hyunjin doesn’t want to disappoint you in the slightest.

  Another bite, another piercing of teeth, another painful moment that’s immediately eclipsed with pleasure. This time you cry out and arch into his body as he hovers. This time Hyunjin holds onto you for support and moves towards a hardened nipple. “Easy,” you say, voice heavy with haze and confusion,”Don’t bite there.” You already feel the grazing of a sharp tip digging into the very skin of your nipple. Hyunjin doesn’t move right away. He continues to tease, to encircle your peak with the very edge of his tooth as his eyes meet yours. “Hyunjin—”

  Pulling the strands of his hair in an attempt to steer him away, he takes this as encouragement for his playful antics. Just before the sharp canine can break skin, your nipple meets the soft caress of his blue tongue. The plush appendage caresses your chest. Every so often, just as you lose yourself in his tongue, the threat of his canine jolts your crescendo of moans and pleas, resulting in the ever-present dribble and ache of your insides. The more his tongue entangles your chest, the heavier the scent of flowers rushes over your senses and blossoms on the inside of your nose and the back of your throat. His tongue leaves a blue-tinged residue that stays wet and thick against your skin as he pulls away. 

  The longer he licks, the more he licks, the more your body burns. Soon Hyunjin begins to travel around the expanse of your torso; nipping and tasting every inch of skin. As he travels and explores your body, the bites on your neck and chest burn deliciously with a feeling you can’t explain. With little effort, he kneels on the ground and pulls your leg over his shoulder. Whether he’s seen this before on the internet or read about it on of your many... books, you can’t bother to wonder. The burning turns to an ache. The aching turns into longing. The cycle continues in a never-ending circle that your honey-drunk brain can’t even process until Hyunjin viciously bites into the dip of your hip. This time your pleasure is unabashed, loud and wanton. You cry out, twisting his hair between your fingers and arching your hips further into his hold.

  “Hyunjin, keep going,” you beg, your breath failing you,”c’mon, keep going, please!”

  For once the alien is quiet and uninterested in banter. His eyes darken with interest as his nostrils flare. He sniffs the air pointedly. You’re too far gone to pretend to be embarrassed or attempt to make yourself wanton. You sit there calmly against the counter as his gaze wanders over your sex. The air around him changes as he continues. His fingers dance across the soft fleshy hood of your clit, thumb pressing against the small organ tentatively. As he continues staring and admiring the soft lines of your labia, Hyunjin begins licking his lips hungrily. You look down to see Hyunjin’s hungry gaze and the sight of blue-tinged drool lining the soft flesh on his face.

  From this angle, you can see and feel the blue glossy substance on your skin. You can practically feel his hunger as his gaze remains unrelenting against you. All you want to do is feel him against you. The ache you feel in your chest is almost overwhelming. Raising your hips you thrust your hips forward him in a small cant, attempting to entice the alien. The open display of lewdness is enough to bring Hyunjin came to your reality. 

  His nose brushes against your wet. You can hear more than feel the way he takes a deep whiff of your arousal. You burn too much to be embarrassed by the display. Hyunjin’s fingers dig into either side of your flesh thighs and spread the skin there until he meets a clear view of his prize. A flash of blue comes across your vision before you feel the soft tongue lap at you. Its gentle in its ministrations, curious as it explores each fold and crevice. The velvety feel of the organ makes you push against it, pulling moans out of you as it molds and swishes against you.

  Hyunjin groans around your hole as his tongue enters and sucks harshly at the swollen flesh of your opening and perineum. You’re so close to the full sensation of pleasure that you can nearly taste it. But Hyunjin is curious. He doesn’t search wholeheartedly for your orgasm, but instead flicks and twists his tongue inside of you. As his tongue digs further inside you, you note a hardness in the organ that wasn’t there a moment ago. It seems to grow firm nside you, those warty bumps on the side hardening as he searches you further and further. It’s when his tongue gets dangerously far that you feel a start of fear in you. 

  “Hyunjin,” you whisper on instinct, the slight fear in your voice undeniable. As hot as the sight of him between your legs is, there’s no telling if Hyunjin is even compatible with your body. Despite the very human features he seems to have, Hyunjin is ultimately wearing a disguise; appealing to your nature and what you deem appropriate. You have no idea what he could be like he’s in the mood. Would he spit venom as he crests? Would he rip out the flesh of your neck and claim you as his alien bride? Would his saliva, the blue-tinged liquid dripping from his appendage, melt your skin? Would he bite off your head like a praying mantis after it was all said and done? 

  There was no telling what could happen. But as Hyunjin’s tongue turns from that plush petal softness to rigid and firm, your mind begins to blank. The tongue slithers against your walls slowly, methodically, pressing with purpose against the ridges inside of you. If you pay close attention, you could’ve realized that Hyunjin is mapping your cunt with his tongue, tasting and learning each delicate crease that made up your hole. The appendage seems to change shape, becoming thicker and firmer, as you arch and moan in confusion and desperation. You can’t tell if it feels good or if it feels foreign and strange. 

  As Hyunjin continues, you begin to feel hotter. At first, you attribute this to your movements, your gasping and groaning as Hyunjin seems to eat you from the inside out, but you begin to realize that you wouldn’t sweat like this. Droplets of sweat blossom on your skin as you writhe underneath his hands. His grip remains firm as if you’re getting in the way of his fun. 

  As your hips follow along with the movement of his tongue, chasing after each push and pull of the appendage that swirls and flicks at your deepest parts, you feel a pressure building in your head. It’s insistent, needling, pushing against a sort of barrier that you didn’t even know you really had. It seems like the pain from last night is back briefly. Your nose scrunches at the feeling and your hand comes up to tug at your hair, attempting to relieve your scalp from the cold pressure. Darkness surrounds you as the pressure pushes and pushes until you finally begin to go slack, to give in. Only then do you hear it.

  “Stay still.”

  The voice is all too familiar.

  You hear his voice bouncing off of your head and settling deep. But his mouth is busy, you thought, how could he be talking to me? It’s then that it clicks. It makes you shudder in disbelief. How much more about Hyunjin would you find out over the next couple of days? Can he read your mind?

  When you look down at him, Hyunjin’s eyes are already there to greet you. He stares up to you with purpose, pushing against your spongy wall until you’re seeing stars again. Then your body alights with sensitivity, a sort of heat that seems to take over you. It feels more intense than any heat you’ve experienced, focused on a particular area. 

  A ping of nerves brings you out of your haze as Hyunjin’s tongue fully unfurls. It gets impossibly higher and soaks your walls with thickness. Finally, he emits a sound similar to a keen once he feels it. 

  When his tongue withdraws you feel incredibly empty and exposed. You can see your glossy fluids coating his tongue as he furls it back into his mouth. For a brief moment, your heat is sated. You reach for him and Hyunjin comes easily. Standing at his full height, you kiss the tops of his cheeks, his forehead, all around his face and grin as he mimics you. He presses clumsy kisses against the tops of your cheeks, your forehead, and all over. As you begin to relax, to feel the ache of those punctures all about your body, it’s back.

  Furious and unending, mind-numbing and impossible need that burns every cell in your body. For a moment, you think of dying, of how death would surely come if this didn’t end soon. Hyunjin continues pressing tentative kisses across your face and neck. He finds his way to his initial mark on your body and sucks at the wound carefully. As he continues to bring you pleasure, to find ways to make you arch and cry, you yearn to bring him further. You yearn to make him ache and burn as you do. You yearn to make him cry out, to make him beg with undeniable burning pleasure. 

  As he continues his ministrations, your hand reaches between the two of you to find his shorts. You rub at the creases in his pants and feel for any sensitive piece of flesh that should be there, but you find...nothing. Your search is long enough that Hyunjin sits up slightly on his knees and watches your hand. There’s nothing hidden away in folds that swells with each particular rub. There’s nothing resting against his thigh, aching to be touched. There’s nothing but legs and some sort of hard object in his pants that’s circular in shape. It doesn’t give way like vaginas do; doesn’t resist and lean in to touch like cocks do; so what could be lying beneath the cotton fabric?

  “What are you looking for?” Hyunjin asks, pressing your hand closer to a flat hard surface in his pants. It’s circular in nature with a hard outer shell and a soft middle. From what you can see now, there’s a slowly spreading wet patch that stains his pants. You rub tentatively, trying to alternate between the harder and slightly softer surface. Each rub, each firm push, seems to bring him further to the edge. Hyunjin pants slightly, eyes half lidded, as he stares at your thighs. 

  Rather than ask “what is that” you follow his lead and add pressure, nearly digging your hand into that rock hard surface. His eyes roll back into his head as he closes them, his hand gripping your wrist to keep you there. His hips begin thrusting into your hand steadily, a loud groan spilling from his lips. As he seems to crest, or get near to it, more fluid begins to stain his pants. Despite the cotton barrier, your hands begin to grow sticky with the liquid and the sight of Hyunjin coming undone in front of you has you clenching your thighs. “Show me,” you say, pulling your lower lip between your teeth,”show me.”

  “I don’t think—”

  “It’s okay. Really.”

  Hyunjin pulls the fabric of his shorts down in one fluid motion. There’s no time to wonder about the lack of underwear once you see the sight of it. A light blue and purple sheath with a long drooling slit in the middle. You reach your hand out again and run your fingers along the drooling slit, smiling at the way Hyunjin shudders and his hands tighten on the waistband of his pants. There isn’t a sense of alarm or confusion like you thought there would be. There also isn’t a sense of disgust. The sight of Hyunjin shuddering in pleasure, the clear arousal in his eyes, is enough to keep you going. But some of that leaves you when the narrow slit starts to widen and open.

  The first thing you notice is the color. The elaborate baby blues and light purples and baby pinks all bleed together into a delicious portrait of delicate wet flesh. The second thing you notice is the shape. It’s...a tentacle. An elongated curved shaft forms into a gently pointed tip. Out of the hard shell that encased his cock is a flap of purple flesh that gently folds over the sensitive area of his possible pubis. The tentacle is smooth with no defined ridges or creases. It curves gently, elegantly in the middle as the worm-like tip seemingly searches for its promised temporary home. Rather than dribbling cum from the smooth head, the appendage is wet all over. It dribbles more of that thick blue-cyan fluid all over; some occasionally lands on the shorts that have pooled on the floor. 

  It’s beautiful.

  The third and final thing you notice is the slight movement of the tip independently from the “shaft”. It jerkily moves before holding still as if searching for something. 

  Is he doing that, you think to yourself, is he moving it?

�� “No.” Hyunjin says quietly,”I’m not.”

  It’s then that you notice how tightly he's holding onto your form. You move your hand towards the organ and pet the flesh gently, gasping as it violently twitches in your hand. A firm hold on it has Hyunjin grunting out and shuddering before you can even properly jerk the flesh.

  “Sensitive?”

  He doesn’t respond, only shakes in your hold. It’s warm in your hand and each squeeze has Hyunjin panting harder; as if you’re stroking a raw nerve. Your hand wanders to the flap of his skin, fingers carefully and gently sliding underneath. Hyunjin’s resulting moan, loud and wanton, has you jumping nearly out of your skin.

  “Please,” he moans, breathy and desperate,”please, please please please please” — it goes on and on until you shush him and say,”Okay, okay.” More fluid drips from around the organ and lands in thick ribbons on your thighs. When you look up at him, you see a blue tint on the tops of his cheeks. Is he blushing?

  There are no guiding hands that hold his cock in place as Hyunjin turns you around and bends you over the counter. As you lean against the harsh surface, you can feel his long fingers in your hair that grab viciously at your curls. You feel prodding and pressure as the slender tip of his tentacle nudges its way into you. It bullies its way into your walls. It has a mind of its own as it demands the promise of heat. When Hyunjin fully enters you, you swear he’s slightly bigger than before. But before you can question, his hips begin to move. As he thrusts, you can feel the tip nudge around your walls as if poking you. Suddenly the tip pokes hard in an upwards motion and finds what it's looking for. You gasp and cling to Hyunjin’s shoulders as your spongy flesh is pounded mercilessly until your voice grows hoarse and your toes curl; until your back arches; until you can feel the very second your brain goes cock drunk.

  You flutter around him and squeeze so tight that Hyunjin can only moan aloud. His tongue hangs with the feeling of it, breathing barely able to catch up. Then you’re there crying out your pleasure and simultaneously choking on the tip of his tongue as it curls around and licks into your mouth. It nearly swallows you whole, nearly drowns you in the feeling. His pace slows slightly and for a split second, you notice the lack of stirring, the sound of fluids mixing. In fact, there isn’t as much give either. Your stomach tight with orgasm stays tense as it accommodates a thicker more prominent length than before. 

  “Hyunjin,” you whimper,”What...?” 

  The tip still abuses your spongy flesh despite the change in size. As he picks up the pace, you feel the effort in each vicious thrust, each punch of his cock in your narrow hole; each drag against your ridges. In an attempt to steady himself, Hyunjin sits up and presses against your lower stomach. “You taste good,” he groans, nearly drooling. Your moans turn to screams, begging for all he’s willing to give. Would you die here? Impaled by him in the throes of passion? Just how deep could he go?

  “Hy-Hyun- oh my god.” 

  The pointed curved head of his cock presses against your spongy insides as he sits fully inside of you. You look down at your stomach, eyes glazing over the bite marks on your flesh, and notice a very noticeable bump staring back at you. You feel far too full, far too stuffed to even process what’s happening to you. How could you even take that much of him to begin with? It almost embarrasses you how willing your body is to let him in, to accept him. “Breathe,” he hisses quietly, a sound that seems like it’s meant to be reassuring. 

  You feel far too full, far too stuffed to even process what’s happening to you. How could you even take that much of him to begin with? It almost embarrasses you how willing your body is to let him in, to accept him. “Breathe,” he hisses quietly, a sound that seems like it’s meant to be reassuring. 

  It’s bigger now. It’s thicker and more insistent as it bruises your gummy walls. The slap of wet flesh plunging into an impossibly tight hole filling the room. You can feel just how deep he is now. The deepest that anyone or anything has ever been. Deeper than anything or anyone should be. Just as you start to adjust to the impossible feeling of being full, you feel another nudge against an entirely different hole. You can’t see where it comes from or what part of Hyunjin it’s coming out of, but you can only assume another tentacle has come through. The feel cool fluid drool into your ass. Somewhere in the distance, in the haze that Hyunjin has created, you feel that pressure against your temples. Then you hear it.

  “Okay?”

  It doesn’t take much to give your consent. The idea of Hyunjin filling almost every hole he can find has you clenching around his cock involuntarily. You nod against the counter and push your hips against the wet tentacle. That’s all it takes. You are a little scared when it pushes easily inside of you. Whatever viscous fluid coats his second tentacle makes its wandering form easier to take. You’re so hot now, so incredibly turned on, that you can’t even care about the danger. You’re willing to take anything and everything. You cum again. And again. The orgasm is a constant thing that leaves you shaking underneath him, leaving you leaking clear fluid onto your kitchen floor. 

  It goes on seemingly forever. Hyunjin doesn’t grow anymore in size — Thank God — but his hips never stop their brutal pace. His cock, the tentacle fiendishly ripping orgasm from orgasm out of you, doesn’t give any indication of stopping. Your heat continues to burn, although not as fiercely, with every pounding of his hips. Through the haze of your coupling, lightning shocks through your lower back as you cum again. Hyunjin doesn’t slow down once; doesn’t even seem inconvenienced by the frequent sound of your spent hitting the tile beneath you. Despite the difference in your species, the animalistic act of mating is something that comes easily to the both of you. You moan in his hold, cry out when he continues grinding out that spongy spot in you. 

  Suddenly something changes in the air. 

  Hyunjin’s hips finally stutter. The second tentacle spasms against the tight heat of your ass while the first begins to pulse. As it pulses, you feel a harsh coolness soothe your burning walls. The fluid sits heavily in your stomach as Hyunjin continues releasing his spent. It begins to hurt a little as he finishes, some of the cyan fluid leaking out onto the floor below you. You feel fuller than before, even as Hyunjin begins to decrease in size. He pulls you closer as you squirm in his hold, crying out in pleasure when the second tentacle continues moving slightly. 

  Suddenly Hyunjin finds his way to your shoulder, and with some finality, bites into the flesh there. This is deeper than the others, unyielding and harsh. If you weren’t currently so full of thick viscous fluid, you’d notice just how close to your arteries he is. The sensation of being to full, the savagery of the bite, is enough to put you over the edge again. Your vision blears on the edges as you feel yourself release onto the floor below you for a final time. It’s Hyunjin’s weight that keeps you pinned to your place on the counter. It’s also Hyunjin’s weight that keeps you collapsing into a heap on the floor. Before you faint, before you fall into Hyunjin’s arms and succumb yourself to the rest you so very much need. Before your consciousness slips from you, you hear one last thing that makes you bubble with fear.

  “Mate.”

#hyunjin x reader #hwang hyunjin #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #skz fanfic #skz fic #hyunjin fic #hyunjin smut #uhhhhhhhh #aliens #alien 1979 #alien x human #stray kids #skz #hyunjin

[azrielgreen]

Do you ever worry that writing dead dove fic could negatively impact your writing career in the future? I'm kind of struggling with this, I've seen so many authors careers ruined by doing much less "problematic" things than writing non-con in a fic. I'd be devastated if by some miracle I managed to write a book that actually got popular just to be canceled by someone digging up my fanfic. From what I've seen the book community is even more harsh than fandom, there's no nuance or room for discussion whatsoever, when the hammer falls that's it and no one wants to be seen as being on the wrong side so they won't read your book. I don't want to limit myself creatively or have to be secretive and paranoid, I'm here to make friends, but I also don't want to shoot myself in the foot. I'm just curious if you've thought about how you'd handle a situation like that.

This is a really sad way of looking at things and I'm really sorry that the absolute state of fandom has people feeling so down and so heavily policed.

I don't ever worry about this.

One of the first messages I ever got about 'You're Divine' was someone telling me that it meant so much to them that I was open about who I am and upfront about writing fic because it made them believe one day a fanfic writer might break into the publishing industry.

There are THOUSANDS of professional writers who also write fanfic, many who are very open about it. I will be one of them.

This Dead Dove "Panic" isn't new, it comes and goes. This discourse is old as shit and just about as interesting to anyone except the people who are eagerly learning puritanical ways to bully and harass.

I always write for myself. I write what I want, how i want and I will share that with the people who want to read for it for as long as I can. I will content warn and create as many safe barriers for readers as I can. I will always write with empathy and nuance and authentic curiosity and i will always stay open to the changes i can make to be more open minded, more inclusive, to broaden my horizons and explore with an open heart.

I will not censor myself.

I will not stand on a pedestal and loudly decry others to detract attention from myself and my own works.

I will not stand for bullying and I will NOT quieten my literary voice because there are those who think that depicting rape is endorsing rape. I won't bow to those who seek to remove the context every single time and I will never bow to purity culture.

If I sell 10 books in my life, I'll know that's 10 people who really wanted to read my work and they did. That's amazing to me.

I have nothing but respect for those who choose to shield their identity, who write with pseuds, who protect themselves.

But if I can make one fucking person feel better about themselves and their interests, about writing darker material... if i can make ONE person feel unashamed and confident enough to write what they want to, then that'll be worth everything.

I'm always going to write what I want and publishing will be the same. I have no intention of watering myself down for mainstream approval.

The literary world cannot be made up of only ONE type of story. It cannot be censored. It must not be purified and sanctified. Some stories are ugly. Shocking. Horrifying. Brutal. Provocative. The expanse of human emotion of vast and complex. As humans, we sometimes have a need to experience complex, ugly emotions within a framed narrative of safety. We read and we write for so much MORE than moral virtue signalling. It's tiring to see some of the most important stories being blanket labelled as "problematic" just for existing. To see people ignore warnings and context and thoughtlessly embodying the modern puritan.

I'll never stop being who I am and writing for myself. Everything else is secondary. Once you start writing for other people, bowing to purity culture, diluting yourself... it's already over.

Fuck that.

Love, Az.

💜💜💜

#askaz

[just-antithings]

I miss RP (especially multi/panfandom) spaces being a free-for-all in terms of content. This is maybe tangential to the whole pro-anti thing, but it’s beyond grating that people will do things like put canonical minors through literal torture, traumatize them in wars or kill them off for pointless “angst”, but god forbid someone might imply a 16 and 18 year old might be interested in dating. Handholding with a (checks notes) two-year age gap? Well, that’s just a bridge too far.

Characters who were last seen as a minor in canon, even if they were like 17 and 11 months, must always be pure and chaste forever—even if you play an older version of them—but if a character’s slapped with a label saying “18” anywhere in canon people also feel at liberty to post the most unholy levels of horny shit about them even if they’re less mature than their younger counterparts. (No hate to those people either, but as someone whose hands are tied by an arbitrary number affixed to a fictional piece of data it’s really grating.)

I’m not even interested in writing smut for Christ’s sake… I just want the freedom to acknowledge that my young adult muses are growing up. I want them to be respected as full characters, and not just dolls or curiosities for older characters to “adopt” or play parent to. Young people thinking about romance, or even—gasp—sex!!—is just a normal part of that, you know? In what universe is that “weird” or “perverted”?! It’s fucking normal!!

It’s just so stifling. Everyone is constantly walking on eggshells, like it’s this giant fucked up game of prisoner’s dilemma where I can TELL that many of my peers also want to talk about these subjects casually and openly, but nobody actually can because everyone is so afraid of getting snitched out and ganged up on by others they otherwise want to consider friends. You never know who you can trust versus who’s going to go all holy crusader on your ass for some made-up shit. (and some RP partners in the past have even privately confessed the same thing to me!! God knows they’re lucky the person they trusted to tell wasn’t some morally-grandstanding bully who would flay them alive for the mere suggestion!!)

Purity rhetoric is a fucking cancer on roleplay communities, and I wish I knew where I could go to just be rid of it.

#mod erin #ask #just anti things #image #bullying mention

[thegoosetyrant]

Heeeeyyyyyy I’ve never partook in the Sk8 fandom before because a very large amount of you are so deep in this new wave of fandom purity culture that it makes the fandom no fun to be in.

I watched Sk8 as it came out, and it was love at first sight. I loved the animation, the races, how colorful and stylish everything was, and I really related to Reki’s struggle with imposter syndrome and overall in just think it’s a great show that I love very much.

But I also found myself relating to Adam quite a bit. His struggle with his strict family, having to be two faced around your family and among your friends/community, wearing a figurative mask and wanting to be anonymous out of fear that your family will discover something about you that you don’t want them to see. It really struck a cord with me, I saw a major part of my life in him, as a queer person.

But no every single person who finds a shred of humanity in his character is called a p*do apologist. Cool guys, very mature. He’s a villain, everyone knows that, he does some p*do shit. News flash, he’s also not real, he can’t hurt anyone. Nobody who likes his character is a p*do you absolute dinguses. Who are you people? Are you the same people that call Rocky Horror problematic? Cuz Adam shares an incredible amount of similarities with Dr. Frankenfurter and everyone loves him (obviously what an icon). Do you guys just not like complex characters? Does every character have to be a paragon of morality? A villain makes the story. Adam is the reason the story happens, he causes the rift. What do people censor his name in this fandom? Like literally some of yall type shit like “ad*m” not even as a joke. Why do people refuse to acknowledge such an important part of why the story of Sk8 is so good?

Remember that one time that multiple Sk8 fanzines banned any content relating to Adam so a group of fans made an Adam focused zine? And someone reported it for sexual misconduct in and attempted to get it canceled only for PayPal to find no violations upon investigation??? Very mature guys.

I’ve been afraid to post anything about how I related to several aspects of Adam’s character and enjoyed how goofy of a villain he was because I was afraid of the purity culture mob making incredibly horrible accusations. I don’t think people realize how nasty and horrible calling someone a p*do apologist is. You don’t know what you are doing throwing those words around all willy nilly. Yall are the ones that are fucking things up. Literally censoring the existence of a character, what a joke. What are you gonna do next, burn any book with a queer character who just sucks? Yall would hate Anne Rice. No Interview with the Vampire? One of the most important works of vampire fiction that exists?Gonna burn some Rocky Horror DVDs and censor one of the most important queer movies of all time just because the villain was a murderer and sexual deviant??? Go to English class and learn some god damn media literacy. Pull that stick out of your ass and laugh a funny camp villain. See humanity in pieces of shit people because none of you are angels. That’s what’s great about fiction. You can do all that in the safety of unreality.

#sk8 the infinity #sk8 #sk8 adam

[tired-biscuit]

I should have included that I was reading it in bed before work bc I woke up extra early and had the time but ended up being late bc I couldn’t stop reading 😭 so I had to finish it AT work and I might as well have been licking the glass of my phone smh 🤣😮‍💨☠️

The purity of his moral dilemma is what has me gnawing at the bars of my enclosure. the thrill of being caught being buried in taboo puss 👀 and we knowww that his breeding kink will pop out the second he’s confident, dominant, and brat taming 🤤

truly, truly I love fangirling over your work. 🫶🏻 the way you write gives me so much satisfaction and is v well done, Miss Biscuit. 🖤

(Super super side note; the monster fucking werewolf Halloween one shot (🥵) u got me down BAD for him leaning into being called a good boy hehe) -🦈

oh no, I’M SORRY FOR MAKING U LATE TO WORK, i hope you didn’t get in trouble!!!!!!

now that i’m thinking about it, maybe i should write more dark content for kiba………. i think the closest i got to it when it comes to him was with the stepbro fic, but idk we shall see……. i kind of enjoy making him suffer a bit whenever it comes to morality, lmao

ALSO OMG, the breeding kink coming out the second you’re fresh outta college and he’s trying soooo hard not to spook you with it??????? like, he’s fucking you raw and he’s just fantasizing about putting a baby in you even though he knows you’re on birth control…….. but babytrapping secretly sounds soooo appealing to him?????? because that way he has a better chance at keeping you all for himself, and since you’re still so wild and kind of ditzy with youth, the idea of anchoring you that way attracts him a lot………

i think he’d get sexually frustrated and would turn very intense in bed despite pretending like everything is fine afterwards….. as if he didn’t feel his cock twitch in his pants when you jokingly called him daddy once……..

and about the monsterfucking fic; YES, his tail wagging over it was so ndjdidjfhf LMFAOOOO, he really is a good boy :3

#cw breeding #cw age gap #biscuit mail #🦈 anon

[henrysglock]

I promise life will be a lot more fun if you embrace byler in all it’s deliciousness instead of trying to run away from it in an effort to be “moral.” once you say “fuck it, I’m not gonna self-censor myself, and I’m embrace everything without any filters,” it becomes so much easier to say, “Byler sex! Hell yeah.” I used to be just like you, always trying to be in the middle. Until one day I threw all of purity culture out the window. and I felt so much joy afterwards.

The “spicy” side is glorious 🥵

Why are you giving me a 001-style monologue, Anon, hm? You want to be him so badly, but you're not. You're not.

Oh, but I know you just want to be soothed. You want me to tell you it's okay for you to behave this way, to have these desires. I know what it's like to crave validation, to want people to tell you you're in the right, that you're good.

But the truth, Nonnie...the truth is, it's not good. Fantasizing about sex that involves minors isn't glorious. It's not delicious. It's not purity culture to tell you that wanting to read and fantasize about kids fucking is gross. NSFW content of 14 year old boys is disrupting the balance of the ecosystem that is the byler tag. You're enforcing a structure of your own...a deeply unnatural structure.

You claim I'm censoring myself, but I'm not. In fact, I'm doing the opposite by speaking my piece, and I won't let people like you try to silence me, to change me, because it is not I who is broken. It is you. You put up this façade of confidence, but it's a lie. It's nothing but a silly, terrible play that you put on so you can hide from the truth: the desire for depictions of sex involving minors (particularly if you're an adult) is gross. You've really left me no choice but to act. To speak out. You cannot control me, and you'll realize that soon enough. You will see.

Seek help, Anon. Leave the "spicy" side. You'll be so glad you did.

#asks #posts to be read in jamie bower's voice

[ltleflrt]

can i ask - what are you thoughts on the current anti-shipping phenomenon in fandom? I've recently gotten into SPN fandom and fallen in love with your fics, but the state of the fandom puzzles me a bit.

Anti-shipping is not a SPN fandom phenomenon, and maybe it seems to be a bigger deal to you because it's a bigger fandom? Wincest and Destiel shippers have been at war since episode 04x01 aired lol...we even have derogatory names for each other: Wincels and Hellers.

(Jokes on the Wincels, because Heller is a fucking awesome name.)

(Wincestiel shippers are fandom unicorns, and they deserve love and respect.)

I've only been involved in fandom since 2011, so most of what I know about anti-shippers comes from piles and piles of posts talking about fandom history, but the gist of it is that this is not current, it is ongoing since the dawn of fandoms, we just have names for it now. Think about Spirk back in the 60s...there were lots of rabid fangirls who saw nothing romantic between them too. We just don't hear as much about them, because they lost their fandom war lol

It's just really loud right now with the rise of conservatism, fascism, and terfs. And social media amplifies all of the above.

Anyway, my thoughts on anti-shippers is that they need to grow up and mind their own business. I am a pro-shipper, which means I believe that anyone has the right to love any ship, no matter how problematic, no matter how much it squicks me out. I believe everyone should be allowed to read whatever vile smut they want, because thought crimes are not real.

Unless a real person is being hurt, have fun.

Antis claim that problematic ships and kinks hurt people, but I think it's important to understand that there's a big difference between accidental and deliberate harm. And harm mitigation is highly important in a world with 7+ billion people and 7+ billion different lived experiences.

If an anti-shipper is hurt by a ship they don't like, they need to learn how to block and filter content so they don't see it, and on the opposite side of that, the vile shippers/kinksters need to tag their nonsense so that they're not accidentally burning someone's eyes out. Which most people ARE kind enough to do. They sit around in their little ficcing circles and cackle over the evil things they're putting their blorbos through, and they put up warning signs, but the antis come barging in to bug them anyway.

In my opinion, many antis are big fucking bullies and do a lot more harm than they claim to try and prevent, and they can all go fuck themselves with something hard and sandpapery.

So uh... yeah, that's how I feel about it 😁

(okay actually I'm not done, there's a lot of anti-shipping discourse about age gaps and what counts as incest that are just... really fucking stupid, and I honestly believe that shit started out because people were grasping for straws to justify why their ship is better than the ship they don't like. unfortunately, the youngins have been soaking up that moral purity language as Objective Truth because they're little sponges. i hope they outgrow that bullshit eventually. i will forgive and forget if they leave behind their purity police badges.)

#ltleramblings #reply #anonymous #purity police #anti shipping #pro shipping #yes i do enjoy the 'problematic' stuff myself #i don't like wincest at all #but i respect people's rights to ship it #i mean i ship cas/jimmy as twins soooooo #pot kettle blah blah blah #someday i want to write a darkfic that alienates my reader base #oh the darkfics that live in my head #i just can't seem to get them out of my imagination and into a fic #the two times i've tried they turned oddly romantic #HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN? #THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DIRTYBADWRONG #sigh oh well

[taviamoth]

"stop pressuring content creators to speak out on geopolitical issues!!! not everyone knows everything! they don't owe you moral purity! you're annoying/a teenager (bad thing)/etc"

i sure fucking hope they know killing kids is bad & fuck you all for trying to sanitize the gore with formal wording. stand over the corpses and tell them they're a fucking geopolitical issue.

it's been over four fucking months. if you're a public figure and you've kept dead silence for my own mental health's sake what i'll do is distance emotionally and see you as existing only in the content, not come crying and begging you to have a basic sense of morality.

if you become furious seeing it as some kind of moral grandstanding or show of "purity" being demanded of people when they're asked to contribute to the public outcry against brutal slaughter and genocide, kill yourself immediately.

#free palestine #palestine #free gaza #gaza #content creators #go fuck yourselves #people are being killed