#there’s a chance that i become jet lagged lol and i have things to do the day after lol

[akkivee]

my flight’s in like, two-ish days pls provide my inflight entertainment 🥺👉👈

#this is vee speaking #my art tag is ‘vee is arting’ if you want a point of reference (tho don’t go too far back lmao) #i’m in a precarious situation with that flight lol it’s at 1am but i land in nippon around 1pm so if i sleep #there’s a chance that i become jet lagged lol and i have things to do the day after lol #so hopefully drawing will help me make good napping decisions lmao #if you decide to make me miserable i endorse your decision lol idk what you could say are my style traits tho

[purplesurveys]

1462

survey by daizy62

What was the last thing you spent under $5 on? Parking fees.

How many times have you cried in the past week? I don’t even know what to tell you; the waterworks really set off in the last week because of how distraught and helpless I felt over the election results.

When was the last time you saw a rainbow? I’m not sure. It’s been a while.

Have you ever had feelings for someone your best friend was dating? That’s never happened.

Have you ever used your cell phone as a light source in the dark? Yes. My phone has a flashlight, but sometimes when it’s pitch dark and I feel like the flashlight would be too bright for my eyes, I still tend to use just the screen as a light source.

Is there anything written on the shirt you're wearing? Yeah it’s a reference to this mistake-turned-meme that was once tweeted by a national news outlet:

And it basically translates to, “I quit, I’m tired.”

What is your relationship with the last person to comment you? She’s a co-worker, my former superior, and also my closest friend at work.

Would you rather spend 2 days in London or a week in Finland? I’d choose Finland. I don’t even think two days would be enough for me to just recover from jet lag.

Where were you living in 1997? The technical answer to this would be my mom’s uterus – at least by the middle of the year, lol.

How long have you known the first person in your phone contacts? Since grade school.

How was your first kiss? It was okay. The person told me she really liked it but I honestly thought it had been a little awkward. Definitely not in a bad way, but just awkward in the sense that we were two kids having their first kiss and not really completely knowing how to do it yet. It was awkward yet cute, and not a bad memory at all.

Do you still talk to the person you shared it with? No, I don’t. It’s funny how the world likes to keep itself small, though – Angela spotted her at a mall once; and currently, she’s Kata’s best friend’s workmate. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if we run into one another at some point.

Are you the oldest of your siblings? Yes indeed.

What are your initials? RC, and that’s all the letters you’re getting.

What does that middle initial stand for? I didn’t share my middle initial.

When was the last time you kissed someone? Sometime in 2020.

Do you regret it? I neither regret nor not-regret it.

How long is it until your next birthday? It’s 11 months away; I just had my birthday last month.

How old will you be? Quarter of a century.

What was the last song you heard? On by BTS.

Do you have any tattoos? Nopes.

How would you react if you found out you were pregnant right now? Be baffled for the rest of my life probably.

What is your mother's maiden name? I’m never sharing that.

How many people do you know with the same first name as you? Less than 5.

Are you related to a Johanna? Uhm, close. I have an aunt named Joan.

Have you ever hugged an Eric? Yeah, that’s the name of one of my godfathers. He was also my dad’s best buddy in college.

Have you ever ridden in a car with a Brooke? Nope.

Have you ever kissed a Jesse? Nope.

Have you ever worked with a Heather? I wouldn’t say worked. I was classmates and friends with a Heather in high school, but have never been in a work setting with her.

Have you ever dated a Ryan? I have not.

Which of your friends would be most likely to become a stripper? I dunno if there is any one of them who’d likely become a stripper, even hypothetically hahaha.

How long has it been since you showered? I took a shower this morning before leaving for mass.

Who were you last on the phone with? I called my parents in a panic last Friday while driving because I had just remembered that there was a chance my car was under the coding scheme that day. Fortunately they said I was good, haha.

Who was your last text from? Some scammer.

Where did you/do you go to high school? Some local school you wouldn’t know about so there’s no need to name it.

What is the nearest red object to you? Ketchup.

Do you have a birthmark? Yes, a couple.

If so, where? Upper left part of my back, by my butt, and the crook of my right elbow though the latter is barely obvious now. It had mostly been visible when I was a baby. 

Who was the last person to let you down? A cousin of mine who I know voted for Marcos.

When was the last time someone gave you flowers? My birthday.

Would you ever consider getting back together with an ex? I’d have to be incredibly stupid and have no self-respect if I do decide to get back together with them.

Do you like it when someone takes you by surprise and kisses you? I mean yeah as long as that person is a significant other. I’d be super grossed out and probably even traumatized if it were some random person.

Can you name a movie that makes you cry? Liway, without fail. I’ve seen it three times and it’s made me cry three times.

What is your natural hair color? Black.

Do you sleep naked? No.

Is smoking a turn-off when it comes to being interested in someone? Not so much anymore, unless they have a legit smoking problem.

Have you ever dated someone who had kids? I have not.

What was the last book you read? I can’t remember.

Have you kissed someone 4 or more years older than you? No.

How about younger? Also no.

Were your parents married when you were born? Yep.

What would you do if you were stranded on a desert island with an enemy? I don’t have enemies.

Were you born before 1990? Noooooope.

Is your hair longer than your shoulders? Yeah, it has been for a while now. It’s definitely due for a trim now and I’ll probably have that done too the next time I have my hair dyed again.

Why did you miss the last call you missed? I think the delivery guy just accidentally pressed call because he hung up as soon as I picked up.

Have you ever been pulled over twice in one day? No, thank fucking christ. Traffic enforcers freak me out and getting pulled over just once is more than enough to send me crying lmao.

When was the last time you went out of state? My birthday weekend.

When you need to vent, who do you turn to? Depends on the nature of the rant, but my favorite go-to people are Angela, Kata, and Andi.

When was the last time you went to the movies with someone? December 2019, LOL. I haven’t been back in a cinema since.

Would you have gone to Woodstock if you'd been around for it? I definitely wouldn’t have traveled for it.

Are you comfortable in your own skin? Sure, for the most part.

Have you ever been told you're a flirt? No.

Are there any candles in the room with you? We do have candles in our dining table centerpiece but it’s never lit and is kept here for decorative purposes.

Does the last person you kissed have tattoos? Who knows. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve since gotten one or a few.

Do you live within 20 miles of where you were born? Yeah, Manila isn’t that far away.

Is it after 5pm? Yep, it just turned 9 PM.

Is there someone you always call/text when you're drunk? Hell no.

Have you ever been engaged? Nopes.

Has anyone seen you naked in the last week? Nope.

Were you dating anyone in October 2008? No...I was 10.

Where was your current profile picture taken? At a museum.

Is your birthday in April? Hey, yes it is!

Are you a Libra? I am not.

If you found $20, what would you spend it on? I’d save it.

What did your last text say? It’s just a scam text.

What is your favorite holiday? My birthday, if it counts.

Do you believe the saying experience is the best teacher? Not always. It’s been made very clear to me that being able to experience something firsthand won’t always lead people to have reliable takeaways.

#survey #surveys

[splendidly-secret-sick-fics]

I’m Fine: An AtsuHina fic (Part 2)

Here it is!! Part 2 of my AtsuHina fic. 

I’m sorry it took so long. I had a really hard time figuring out exactly what I wanted to happen and how I wanted to characterize them. I think Hinata ended up being pretty ooc, but I’m like okay with it? I kinda hc that when he gets older, he calms down a lot and becomes like a very comforting person to be around. Like he’s still kinda goofy, but it’s more ~refined~ if you will. 

If you missed my most recent post, I’m going to start trying to shorten these fics a bit! I really enjoy writing these, but they’re also very very tiring lol. 

Anyway!! Without further ado... 

I’m Fine: An AtsuHina fic (part 2)

Part 1

Pairing: Sick Atsumu, caretaker Hinata

Word Count: 2,644 (!!!) 

Trigger Warnings: vomiting, swearing (?) 

----------------------------------------------------------

“—umu. Babe, please wake up.”

A voice cut through Atsumu’s brain and groaned. His mouth tasted terrible and it was about 900 degrees wherever he was right now. All in all, he’s never felt worse.

“Tsumu, please. Come on.” A hand tapped his face and he swatted it away with a groan.

“Okay, that was something. Open your eyes now for me, baby.” His cheek was pinched. He scrunched his nose and squeezed his eyes open. The light burned his eyes, but when he looked up, he was met with the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. The most fantastic gift he could have received during this incredibly trying time in his life.

“Shoyo?” he whimpered, his bottom lip quivering. Shoyo smiled at him and it was so beautiful and amazing and Atsumu felt so relieved because he wasn’t alone anymore.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m here.” Shoyo rubbed his hand up and down Atsumu’s arm. Atsumu bit his lip and tried to sit up. Shoyo was right there, gently pulling Atsumu up and into his arms. Atsumu grabbed on with what little strength he had.

“Yer home?” he cried. Shoyo smelled like airport  and it didn’t help his nausea at all. It didn’t matter though because he was home. And he was holding Atsumu and maybe things would be okay now.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m here. I’m sorry I’m late,” Shoyo reassured. Atsumu’s bottom lip quivered and his eyes water. A sob escaped before he could stop it. Shoyo’s arms around him tightened and that was all it took for the floodgates to open. Tears rolled down Atsumu’s flushed cheeks and he cried pathetically into Shoyo’s chest.

“Pl’se don’ leave me. ‘M s’ry,” He gripped Shoyo’s shirt tightly.

“I’m not. It’s okay. You’re okay.”

Time passed slowly and Atsumu wasn’t sure how long he cried and clawed at Shoyo, begging him not to leave. Eventually though, he calmed down enough to realize that his stomach was still rolling.

“So you’re not feeling very good, huh, Tsumu?” Shoyo asked and planted a kiss on the top of Atsumu’s head. He shook his head.

“When did you get home?” he asked. Not that he even knew what time it was anyway.

Shoyo hummed, “not that long ago. I rushed home from the airport. Samu and Rin blew up my phone as soon as I landed.” Atsumu scrunched his face.

“Why would they do that?”

“Are you serious?” Shoyo snorted. “You texted them incoherently at two in the morning. They said something about how you were dying and never wanted to eat or see the light of day ever again. You scared them,” he paused, “scared me, too.” He added, quieter. Atsumu felt him rest his cheek on the top of his head.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. When did he text them all of that? There was absolutely no memory of those texts being sent anywhere in his brain.

“S’okay,” Shoyo said. They fell into a comfortable silence.

“Can you tell me how long you’ve been in the bathroom?”  Shoyo asked eventually.

Atsumu shook his head again, because no, honestly he couldn’t.

“Las’ thing I ‘member clearly is Samu and Suna bein’ here.” Shoyo exhaled slowly.

“That long, huh? Have you thrown up a lot?”

At that, Atsumu nodded his head vigorously, because yes, if there’s anything he knows about the past 24 hours, it’s that he’s spent a lot of them crying and puking.

“Have you eaten anything? Anything to drink? Any meds?”

A hesitant shake of the head.

“Okay. Well let’s start with that, yeah? Then we’ll try and get your fever down.” Shoyo patted Astumu’s back and made to get up.

No no no. Atsumu didn’t want anything in his body. Just the thought of it brought back the nausea to a level that made him squirm.

“Please no,” he whimpered. Shoyo was standing, stretching his arms above his head.

“I’m sorry, babe. Gotta get that fever down and get some liquids in you. You’re probably really dehydrated. You don’t want to go to the hospital right?” Shoyo peered down at him, an eyebrow raised.

Well, no. He didn’t want that.

“Don’ wanna throw up.” Atsumu pouted.

“I know,” Shoyo rubbed his head, “but don’t worry, I’ll be here.”

And thank god Shoyo was there.

Not even an hour later, Atsumu was hunched over a bowl on the couch, heaving and bawling.

Shoyo made him drink a sports drink and take some fever reducers. He was in the clear for a little while, so they decided to chance some soup. When it looked like he was okay, Shoyo decided to take a shower and wash the nasty airport stank off of himself.

By the time he got out, Atsumu was sobbing in a puddle of his own vomit. From there, the situation only spiraled into disaster.

Atsumu, now clean of his own puke, but quickly sweating through his new clothes, whimpered pitifully as he heaved.

“Tsumu, you have to calm down. You’re making it worse,” Shoyo soothed, rubbing up and down Atsumu’s back.

“I don’ wanna,” he coughed, “puke ‘a’ymore.” He punctuated his statement with a wet belch, as if the universe wanted to mock him.

The room was spinning and he wanted everything to stop. He felt so out of control of his own body. He was sticky and gross and it was so freaking hot.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry, please calm down, Atsumu,” Shoyo tried. Atsumu heard the shake in his voice and he wanted to tell him it was okay and that he was fine and that he was sorry and get his shit together so he didn’t cause his jet-lagged boyfriend any more grief, but he simply could not do that.

Instead, he gagged and choked on a small stream of bile. Everything hurt. His toes, his head, his limbs, his throat, especially.

He breathed heavily over the bowl and hoped to god he was done. At least for now.

Shoyo patted his face with a damp and blissfully cold wash cloth. Atsumu glanced at Shoyo’s scrunched face and sighed.

“‘M s’ry ya had t’ come home t’ this, Sho.” Atsumu felt utterly pathetic. He wanted to welcome Shoyo home with a nice dinner and a relaxing night in, and instead here he was taking care of Atsumu.

Of course, he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t grateful. There was no way in hell he would have lasted another night on his own.

“It’s alright, baby. I really don’t mind. I just wish you weren’t feeling so bad,” Shoyo frowned. Atsumu weakly reached up to hold his hand.

“Thank ya,” he slurred around the disgusting-ness he felt in his mouth. Shoyo’s mouth quirked up minutely.

“Is there anything I can do for you?” He asked, stroking Atsumu’s sweaty hair back with his free hand.

Atsumu nodded, “I w’nna change again. ‘M sticky.” Shoyo hummed in affirmation and stood up.

“I’ll be right back then. I’m gonna take the bowl and rinse it out. You’ll be okay for a few minutes?” He looked skeptical. Atsumu nodded. Leaving a quick peck on Atsumu’s sweaty forehead, Shoyo bounced out of the room. His stomach had been eerily calm for a few minutes now, so he took the chance to relax some and slumped back on the couch. He brought an arm up to rest over his eyes.

Why was this even happening? It was pure misery. If he could sleep it off, he would, but he was too afraid of getting sick while sleeping.

Sensing his anxiety, his stomach cramped. He groaned, placing a hand on his angry belly. His eyes stung. How many times has he cried in the past 24 hours? It didn’t really matter, he supposed, and let the tears roll down his face.

Quite abruptly, a regrettably familiar pressure in his chest returned and Atsumu sat up.

He was going to puke. And Shoyo wasn’t back. He couldn’t move. Should he call for him? No. No he didn’t want to open his mouth. It was fine. He was fine.

His throat constricted and he swallowed hard, bringing his knees under him on the couch. The blanket on his lap twisted around his legs, which only made him more uncomfortable. Using one hand to support his weight, he leaned over the couch. At least he could try and minimize the damage by puking on the hardwood instead of the upholstery if Shoyo didn’t make it back in time.

His head hung limply over the side of the couch. Spit collected in his mouth and he tried to swallow it down, but that only made him gag, so he dropped his jaw and let it dribble out of his mouth. His sense of shame disappeared hours ago.

His chest jolted with a hiccup that scratched his throat and he whimpered. Was Shoyo back yet? He would be fine until he came back, right?

A painful stomach cramp answered that for him. It told him no you won’t be. And with that, he gave up.

A few airy burps passed through his open lips and his stomach gurgled. Please no more please I don’t want it. But he had no more energy to fight it.

He coughed a few times and his throat gurgled.  With another cough, he wretched and a painful mixture of (mostly) bile and soup spilled from his mouth and onto the floor.  

Atsumu let out a broken sob before he pitched forward and vomited up more of the disgusting mixture.

“Atsumu!” Shoyo reentered the room at that moment and Atsumu lifted his head.

“Shoyo,” he choked before he dry heaved towards the ground again. Shoyo sat beside him and brushed back his hair. The bowl appeared in front of him again.

“Oh, baby, I’m so sorry. I tried to hurry.” Atsumu shook his head. He forced down another heave. He was empty. Physically and mentally.

“ I don’t..I don’t feel good at all,” he cried, his voice trembling right along with the rest of his body.

“I know,” Shoyo sighed, “I know. I’m sorry.” He wrapped an arm around Atsumu’s shoulders and rested a cheek on his sweaty back.

“Are you done, ya think? For now?”

Atsumu nodded and Shoyo guided him back to lean back on the couch. He readjusted the blanket, much to Atsumu’s appreciation and handed him a water bottle.

“Here. Rinse out your mouth.” Atsumu took it hesitantly and swished the water in his mouth before spitting it in the newly cleaned bowl.

“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice quiet and raspy. Shoyo shook his head.

“Don’t worry, okay? Stop apologizing. You can’t help it.”  Shoyo pet his head and smiled at him sadly. “I’m going to clean this up and then I’ll help you change, okay?”

Atsumu nodded and closed his eyes. He felt himself drifting off and as much as he would love to sleep, he was still too scared. He really hated waking up all of last night to himself already puking and really didn’t want to relive it.  Every time he felt himself pulled into sleep, his anxiety woke him back up.

“Atsumu, here. Let me help you change,” Shoyo whispered sometime later. Atsumu opened his eyes to find the floor clean and Shoyo sitting in front of him again. In his lap was one of Atsumu’s favorite t-shirts, and a pair of athletic shorts. He nodded.

Together they got Atsumu into less sticky clothes and lying back down on the couch. The bowl was within arm’s reach, mocking him silently.

“Wanna watch a movie?” Shoyo asked. Atsumu nodded.

“Do you care what?” He shook his head. Shoyo exhaled and pulled his lips together tightly.

Shoyo put in some movie that Atsumu was sure he wouldn’t pay a lick of attention to, even if he wanted to. His stomach was still giving him fits and his head hurt and he was hot and then cold and dizzy and absolutely not fine at all.

“Ready to try some water?” Shoyo asked. He lifted up Atsumu’s feet and sat underneath them. Atsumu’s lip curled and he glared at the water bottle in Shoyo’s hand. He shook his head.

“Okay. Later then.” Shoyo put the bottle on the table. The movie played in the background, but otherwise it was silent. Atsumu tried to ignore how terrible he felt and focus on the movie, but it was increasingly difficult.

“You’re so quiet,” Shoyo sighed at one point, “s’weird,” he forced a chuckle. Atsumu’s eyes lazily slid to look at his boyfriend’s cute little profile.

“Mmm,” he responded. Shoyo’s jaw was tense and his shoulders were raised towards his ears. His lips were pursed and he was fiddling with a stray string on the blanket, twirling it between his fingers mindlessly. Atsumu wished he would relax.

Of course, he knew that wasn’t easy for Shoyo. Especially given Atsumu’s current condition. It made Atsumu feel even worse. His frustration with himself increased when his eyes started stinging again.

“Tsumu? Why are you crying?” Shoyo asked, his eyes wide and eyebrows pulled together. Atsumu furrowed his brows and pouted.

“I don’t feel good,” he whined petulantly. Shoyo’s face relaxed and he laughed.

“Well, obviously. But don’t cry. You’ll feel better soon.” He rubbed Atsumu’s shin.

“Well yeah, but ya had to come home to this and I’m sure yer tired and jet-lagged,” he muttered. Shoyo’s mouth pulled up in one corner and his eyes grew soft.

“Listen, any time with you is my favorite time, okay? Sure I’m tired, but it is what it is. Can’t do anything about you being sick other than help you get better right?”

“Well yeah, but—“

“Sit up,” Shoyo commanded. Atsumu gave him a bewildered look, but did as he was told, wiping away his sticky tears.

Shoyo stood up and Atsumu grunted in protest, but his boyfriend walked to stand by his head and shimmied his way behind Atsumu. He leaned against the armrest and opened his arms and gestured for Atsumu to lay back down.

“I don’t wanna get ya sick.” Atsumu turned his head away. Shoyo laughed. A full laugh and it made Atsumu’s heart stutter.

“Tsumu, it’s too late for that. If I’m going to get sick, I’m going to get sick. And you’ll take care of me, right?” He quirked an eyebrow at Atsumu.

“Obviously, but—“

“Then please lay down. Let’s take a nap.”

Atsumu hesitated.

“C’mon babe. I know you’ve been avoiding sleep, even though you're clearly exhausted. Your body will recover faster if you sleep.” Shoyo’s arms were still open and he wiggled his fingers, taunting Atsumu to cuddle into his favorite pillow.

“I don’t wanna throw up in my sleep again,” he trailed off before adding under his breath, “or on you for that matter.”

“Pft,” Shoyo scoffed, “as if I care about a little bit of puke. I’ve puked on myself so many times.” He said it as though it were an accomplishment and Atsumu raised his eyebrows and frowned. Shoyo cackled.

“Tsumu, please. I don’t mind okay? Look. The bowl is right within arms reach. And I’m here alright? You’re not alone anymore. If you throw up in your sleep, I’ll take care of you.”

Atsumu narrowed his eyes at the wing spiker before grumbling protests under his breath as he moved to lay down.

Shoyo’s arms wrapped around Atsumu, one resting on his lower back and the other coming up to play with the ends of his hair. He felt slightly better almost immediately. Yes, his stomach still seemed to hate him and his fever hadn’t broken and he generally felt like death warmed over, but Shoyo was there.

He sighed contentedly and Shoyo’s chest beneath his ear rumbled with laughter.

“Go to sleep, okay? I’ll be here. You’ll be okay.”

“Yeah. I’ll be fine,” he murmured before falling asleep.

#my fics #haikyuu sickfic #atsuhina #sick atsumu #caretaker hinata #vomiting #tw vomiting

[pierregasly]

Would love to hear your full take on Pierre,,,

Sorry this took me a few days to get to, I meant to answer it immediately but never found the motivation :( Anyways, onto Pierre. 

I believe you are commenting on a post of mine where I stated my fear that the Middle Generation of drivers (Charles, Carlos, Pierre and Max specifically) have/are going to miss out on opportunities and will never reach their full potential in F1. This is similar to what happened to the “Lost Generation” which is comprised of drivers such as Daniel, Kevin, Nico and Checo. To reiterate something that another asker was confused about: it has nothing to do with talent. The generations are not lumped together based on talent but based on their similar ages/entrance into F1 and I am speaking on the wasted potential that this group never got to achieve. (For example, Nico’s full potential was podiums--he never got here. And Daniel’s full potential was a championship--which he’ll never get.) 

I am not going to waste your time and state what I said briefly about Charles, Carlos and Max but I will go into depth more so about what I hardly touched upon with Pierre. As I said, Pierre is a phenomenal talent. As much as his podium and race win may have proven it to the world, many still call him a “luck driver” who is not good enough for a higher team. This is, obviously, because of  his time at Red Bull dramatically overshadowed his career. 

I started following Pierre around 2017 when I first got interested in F1 because of the history. In 2017 he wasn’t racing in Europe but in Super Formula so I took the time to catch up on his career thus far (I will go into depth on this in a moment). I didn’t start watching F1 until 2018 and the only driver (non-historical) I really was attached to was Pierre (others would comes later). Obviously, if you remember, Pierre ended up taking P5 in qualifying and P4 in a Toro Rosso in front of the whole world in only a few races at Bahrain. It was absolutely incredible and for the rest of the season until his Red Bull announcement, Pierre was dishing points place after points place after points place in only his first full season in F1. Therefore, while it was only his FIRST FULL SEASON, the jump to Red Bull ultimately felt justified. 

Of course, this did not end up being the case. Our joy over Pierre getting to be in a higher team made us completely and utterly forget the track record Red Bull has left with its second drivers. For those of you who are new to F1 (either coming in 2019, mid-2019 or 2020) you missed out on Pierre’s debut season which was fantastic for the car he was given. Furthermore, if you came in during mid-2019 or 2020 and you think that the treatment RB gave to Alex is horrible--you are hardly touching the surface. The treatment that RB is giving Alex versus Pierre is like taking your sons on summer vacation and then having one of them sleep on the comfy twin bed with two blankets and the other kid on the floor without so much as PJs. We haven’t even touched upon Daniil. Daniil would be like the parents leaving the kid outside to sleep. 

Let’s move on. It is very easy to look at Pierre’s season and tout only negative things. It was not his best moment and, yes, he certainly could’ve done better. However, with what he was given? Are we even sure about that? For example, Pierre become open with the media following his demotion. Not only did RB leave it to the very last moment but they also would:

1) Use Pierre’s car and car parts to test Max. 

2) When Pierre requested a more experienced engineer, he was denied. However, when Alex requested the same thing, he was given it. 

3) RB consistently spoke horribly of him in front of the media. They constantly spoke that he needed to do better and never tried to build him up. 

4) Emotionally pressured Pierre to his breaking limit.

Now the difference between RB and many other teams is that when the going gets tough for their drivers, many teams choose to build their drivers up to set them up for success. RB’s method is to tear their drivers down and hope that they can pick up their own pieces once they become annoyed with humiliation. The demotion was far, far too quick. Think of Alex--he has been getting worse and worse and worse with a year and half of time at Red Bull. Pierre managed half a season before they gave him the boot. The boot was also without warning even despite Pierre getting better and better each race. 

This is all information you probably already know, I said earlier I would touch upon his younger career and how this has been overshadowed and forgotten due to his time at RB. Here are some facts/statistics that will be important for my point later:

Finished 3rd in the French F4 championship with four wins, two poles and seven podiums over the course of only fourteen races despite having three retirements (the 2nd placer had 0 and the 1st placer only had 1). 

In his first season at Eurocup Formula Renault 2.0 he finished 10th of 51 different racers and every person but one who finished before him in the championship was older than him. Pierre was only 16 when Stoffel V was 20, Daniil K was 18, Oliver R was 20, Norman N was 20, Nyck V was 17, Paul L was 21, Oscar T was 16, Melville M was 18 and Alex R was 18. 

In his second season of Eurocup Formula Renault 2.0 he finished first in front of the likes of Esteban Ocon, Oliver Rowland, Jake Dennis, Nyck de Vries, Luca Ghitto and Alexander Albon.

Finished 6th in the 2013 Formula Renault 2.0 Alps Series despite missing half of the season and there being 42 competitors total (everyone ahead of him completed the full season). 

Finished 2nd of 28 competitors in the 2014 Formula Renault 3.5 Series and lost to none other than Carlos Sainz Jr. 

Finished 1st in his second full season of GP2 (now formally classified as F2).

The GP2 race he won in Silverstone happened right after a huge roadcar accident in which his mother ended up in the hospital. Pierre himself fractured his vertebrae and still went on to win the race while his mother was in the hospital and he had a broken bone. 

Was called in to replace a Renault edams driver in Formula E. He was jet lagged, tired and got only a few hours in the sims. He still managed to secure P4 in qualifying and then was set for a P3 finish but he crashed into the wall on the last corner of the last lap and came home in P4. THIS WAS HIS FIRST TIME EVER IN AN FE RACE OR AN FE CAR.

Finished second in Super Formula in 2017 but lost by only half a point. One of the races in the season was abandoned when he was set to win because of flooding and storm. Had it not been abandoned he would’ve finished first at the end of the season. 

All this pretty much brings you up to speed to when he entered into F1 (which all his amazing stuff you should be familiar with). Moving more onto my “take” regarding Pierre. I have shown evidence for why he is an incredible driver, however, now we’re moving onto the not so great bit. I suppose I must answer one question before I move on. 

Do I think Pierre is good enough, against all the rest of the talent in F1, to get consistent podiums if given the proper car? Absolutely. Do I think Pierre is good enough, against all the rest of the talent in F1, to get consistent wins if given the proper car? Absolutely. Do I think Pierre is good enough, against all the rest of the talent in F1, to fight/win a championship one day if given the proper car? This I firmly believe is possible (other thing I’ll get into if someone wants).

The reason I worry and am distressed about Pierre is because I don’t believe he’ll ever get a go at a higher team again. RB really put a shadow over his career, a shadow that is going to worry other teams from placing him into their cars. He has ultimately proven himself with podiums and, of course, the race win. However, seeing as there is so much young talent coming into F1, I don't see there being a place for him. 

Mercedes is set to most likely be Max and George when Lewis retires. Red Bull would never dare to put him in that seat again. Ferrari has their “golden generation” of Charles and Mick to look after. And those are the seemingly “top teams” (if you can even all Ferrari that). Let’s look at the others. Racing Point is going to be Lance and Seb until Seb retires. I don’t see Pierre ever going to Alpha Romeo. And McLaren is set up for the next few years with Lando and Daniel. Haas--I don’t think so. This is ultimately dangerous for Pierre’s career because RB likes to keep fresh meat in their B team car (or if you trust Horner it’s their “sister team” lol). Pierre’s best chance is the escape the RB family. AND I UNDERSTAND that the regulations could make things VERY different in F1 for the future. These are just my hypothesis and guesses--all is subjective and up to interpretation so @ anybody reading this--relax, buddy. So where does Pierre fit in in the future? These are some scenarios I have conjured up. 

1) Mercedes. Let’s say that, possibly. Max never ends up moving into that second Merc seat and instead remains at RB wasting away until they can get him a better car for the rest of his career (ooo burn sorry it’s for the scenario don’t hate me). This would open up a place at Merc for Pierre to truly shine his potential. Most likely, he would play second fiddle to George but hey--it’s still a seat where can utilize that potential. 

2) Red Bull. This would be if they get desperate. I don’t think if given a second chance, Pierre would say no. If Max were still in the team, he would be second fiddle. I can see Pierre going to RB if Max leaves for Merc in the next few years and they want him to lead Yuki or if Yuki doesn’t shine in AT and they end up dropping him they are going to be slim Pickens... I don’t know if being at RB will give him a place where he can utilize his potential but it’s a possibility. 

3) Ferrari. This would be only a chance if Mick doesn’t do great in Alpha Romeo and they need someone to fill the seat of their obvious place holder Carlos. He would be alongside Charles. Other than that.... Ferrari seems pretty set and there isn’t any space. 

4) McLaren. This I don’t see as very possible? I would love to see him in orange but they seem pretty set with Daniel and Lando. I think Daniel is probably going to ride out the end of his career there. Lando seems very integrated into the team and I can’t see him leaving unless he got a better offer like Merc. If Max didn’t end up taking the second Merc seat in the future and remains at RB then Lando might be given an offer which would open up a place that Pierre could possibly take. Do I count this as realistic? Not really, but it could happen. At McLaren I could see Pierre utilizing his potential. 

5) Renault. This is one of the options that seems most realistic to me. They're set with Fernando for the next few years. If they decided, after 2021, to give the boot to Esteban, that would open up a place for Pierre in a French team that would love a French driver (they already have one but Pierre is a FRENCH WINNER). You know that teams loves their nationalism.... Anyways. Or, possibly, Fernando retires after two years (again lol) which would open up a seat for Pierre to take along Esteban. However, I don’t really see Esteban staying long term because Renault probably needs to put one of their Renault babies like Guanyu or Christian in there. 

6) Williams. Lol. No. 

7) Haas. I don’t see it happening really??? I have my reasons but my gut just says... Au revoir.

8) Racing Point. THIS. This I see as 100% 100% a possibility. Let’s say that Seb retires after two years--this would open up a seat. Pierre is a strong, consistent and stable driver who doesn’t make mistakes. Here he could really use his potential!! #PierreInGreen!!

9) Alpha Romeo. As I said... I really don’t see it. They seem pretty busy with all their young guys. 

So to conclude, the future for Pierre lies at either Renault or Racing Point (less chance but possible includes Merc to McLaren). To not take up any more of  your time, this is what I mean by Pierre being an incredible talent who may or may not get a chance at a higher team. He deserves to have more and to have a second chance. He has really proven himself and is pulling the absolutely maximum out of himself. I really want to see him with more, like he deserves. 

Even Charles wanted him as his teammate at Ferrari back in April... that’s saying even more. Everyone on the grid except Esteban rate him highly as a person and as a driver. His potential deserves smth better. He has proven himself time and time again against everyone who told him he wasn't good enough and who still say it was all just luck. There exists luck. But firmer than luck, there exists skill. 

Pierre Gasly is a race winner in an Alpha Tauri. Do not forget that. 

#oh fuck this is long lol #pierre gasly #flood pressles box #sincerely anonymous

[ahiddenpath]

Grumble grumble

Gonna grumble about life below the cut, lol!  I’m mostly talking about covid-19 in the states.

A few states have closed down public schools for the next two weeks, which means that many parents are unable to go to work (many daycare centers follow local school shut downs).

My workplace responded by telling everyone who can work from home to work from home.  I am a hands-on lab researcher, which means I must continue coming in.  However, they created a temporary category of leave for folks who have been exposed to covid-19, or who are showing symptoms.  They are paying workers to stay home if they are symptomatic.  So really, this is a generous and effective policy...  Provided people use it properly.

And any system that relies on people behaving sensibly is a bad system.

What people don’t seem to realize- even people who work in pharmaceuticals?!- is that covid-19 symptoms aren’t limited to coughing and fever.  It can also look like the common cold, especially in young, healthy individuals.

I nearly lost my cool yesterday because two of my direct, lab-bench buddy coworkers have been coming to work with cold symptoms.  Another was coughing all day, until people shamed him into going home.  Meanwhile, one coworker was explaining that her husband’s coworker was exposed to covid-19.  I asked why the hell she was here, and she said she’s quarantining on Monday when our telework option officially starts.

Guess I’ll just die potentially become a walking incubator of a disease that could kill other people, then?

Situations like covid-19 call for strict, clear rules stated by the federal government and enforced all the way down.  All travelers from impacted areas must be tested/quarantined.  Telework is mandatory when possible.  Anyone showing any kind of illness symptom must be sent home and put on paid admin leave.  Is this disruptive?  Yes.  Will people abuse it?  Yes.  Will it drastically reduce the scope of the pandemic and save lives?  Yes, so it’s worth it.

Sadly, Trump removed the people who handled the Ebola threat with clear, country-wide enforced rules and...  Never... replaced them.  We do not have much in the way of federal guidelines, leaving state leaders to decide what to do about covid-19.  When Congress tried to get approval for mandatory paid leave for people exposed to covid-19, it was shot down.  We don’t have enough covid-19 testing kits.  Our federal government has done nothing to protect us, even though they had time to prepare compared to China, and even Italy, which is... beyond frustrating.  Beyond the pale, really.

I’m trying to do stuff to help?  I pointed out to my boss that our water bottle filler operates by pressing a lever to release water...  And people press it with the mouths of their water bottles.  He blinked and said, “Yikes...  I dispense the water with my cup, too.”

Humans are humans.  Scientists are also short-sighted humans, just like everyone else.  And if people who have dedicated their lives to creating life-saving medicines can be this ineffective in a pandemic situation...  I dunno, I don’t think the future is looking good.

As for the non-scientists in my life, they’re literally more worried about toilet paper than the disease.  I told my mom that I’d get her a bidet attachment, and she was insulted?  I dunno what it is about Boomers that makes them derive genuine pleasure from hating anything that reduces waste.

If you’re interested, here is what I’m doing to try to stay safe:

-Wash hands with soap and water for 20 seconds, frequently.  Do not substitute this with hand sanitizer.  

-Do not touch your face.

-Sanitize your phone and computer daily with alcohol wipes (Lysol is better, but check your device documentation to be sure it can withstand it).

-Don’t worry about toilet paper, buy a gosh danged bidet attachment.  Also, food and TP shortages are not the problem.  Even in quarantines, food stores should be open.  But, if you buy produce or anything loose that people can touch, clean it thoroughly.  A sick person could have handled it.

-Don’t eat out.  Sadly, food industry workers rarely have sick leave and are forced to come in to work when ill.

-Avoid crowds whenever possible, push to telework if you can, don’t travel.

-If possible, stay home if you have any kind of cold or flu symptom.

-Sanitize your home.  Look, I love gentle solutions as much as the next Millennial, but it’s time for bleach and Clorox.

-If you must report to work, inspect the communal coffee/water dispensers.  Could they potentially spread disease?  If yes, report the concern and don’t use them until they are replaced with safer alternatives.  Also, do not eat food left out in communal areas following meetings.

-(Edit:  I walked back this stance in a new post after talking about this in therapy.  I no longer recommend what you’re about to read in this bullet.  Check the post linked at the bottom of this post for why.)  If your coworker is sick and your company offers sick leave/admin leave, shame them, report them, get them out.  I have coworkers who call this a dick move.  I respond that taking the risk of turning everyone around them into covid-19 incubators soars beyond ‘dick move’ and into the realm of ‘endangerment of the elderly and the immunocompromised.’  (Seriously, at least two of my coworkers have immediate family members who have no immune system and wouldn’t stand a chance against covid-19).

-If you’re in the states, you might not be able to be tested for covid-19.  I really don’t know what you’re supposed to do if you think you have it, other than immediate self-isolation.  Calling your doctor for advice is probably the best place to start.  I would not roll into a medical facility without calling ahead.  There might be infected people there, and they might not even have the kit to test you.

In closing, if you are healthy and under age 65, you will most likely be fine if you are infected at this point in time.  But about 3.6% of the USA is immunocompromised.  About 12% is elderly (over 65).  In 2018, there were 327 million people in the states, ish.  So that’s, what...  About 51 million people at risk in my country alone?  

If the pandemic grows beyond the point where our medical system can handle it, even young, healthy people will be at risk, since people won’t be able to receive proper treatment.

I realize this is scary and disruptive.  I’ve never had trouble sleeping in my life outside of jet lag and situations where I was in too much pain to sleep...  But now I’m struggling.  My costochondritis is having a field day, lol!  

Please, please take care of yourselves and others.  I love you!  Take care.

EDIT:  Hey guys!  So I had a therapy session on this topic, and I walked back my stance on some of these points after she pointed some things out to me.  It’s a fascinating mini case study, so please read it!  Also: please don’t force your ideas of what should be done on other people, like I suggested above, that’s the main thing.

#hidden's life

[mayanangel]

Hey guys!

So here’s the thing. A while ago, I had sent an ask to @bohemian-rhapsody-slash about a Ben/Rami scenario that involved them coming out about their relationship. It was one of my favorite Ben/Rami headcanons ever, so I decided to just get up and write the damn thing.

Fast forward to now, and I’ve finally finished writing it. And just in time too, because I’m gonna be working on stuff for Maycury week and my Leezello fic.

Anyway, I hope you guys like it. Let me know what you think! 

Luv ya!

(also on ao3)

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Ben woke up the moment his phone started screeching, hand shooting towards his nightstand to locate the bloody curse. He felt around blindly for a moment, before grasping the wailing the object and moving on autopilot to disable the sounds. Then just like that, the room was once again plunged into silence.

He chucked the phone back onto the nightstand, burrowing further into the warmth of his bed.

“No work today?”

Ben grunted at the sound of the voice, suddenly remembering that he had a bed-mate with him.

“No… maybe.. ’m call in sick or something…” he mumbled.

A soft chuckle sent shivers down Ben’s spine as Rami wrapped his arms around him, pulling him in closer. “Babe…come on..”

The younger man huffed childishly, turning around in his boyfriend’s hold. He squinted in the soft morning light to see that Rami was wide awake, clearly having woken up way before him. Ben managed a lazy furrow of his brows.

“Still jet-lagged?” he inquired. Rami shook his head.

“No, not anymore. Just like to watch you sleeping.” He pressed a kiss on Ben's forehead, running his hand up and down Ben’s naked back. “Did you know that you make little kitten sounds in your sleep?”

Ben scoffed, lightly shoving Rami onto his back and snuggling into his side. “I do not. Now shut up, I’m still sleeping.”

His boyfriend laughed heartily, vibrations echoing through his chest. Ben smiled despite his sleepy, moody, self. He liked this; being here with Rami. It had been so long since they had last seen each other face to face, and he could selfishly admit that he loathed the idea of parting from him so soon. Work be damned - this was where he wanted to spend his day.

As if reading his thoughts, Rami urged him a little bit closer, until he was properly draped over him, face resting just under the older man's chin. Ben breathed in his boyfriend’s scent, silently thanking (not for the first time) his past self for insisting on heavier drapes and darker curtains in his bedroom when he first moved into his flat. For one, they made sleeping through the night a whole lot easier after long and tiring days; and secondly, they made the mornings last longer.

Which was incredibly ideal when it was your main excuse for sleeping in with your boyfriend.

Rami nuzzled his hair, pressing kisses to the edge of his hairline. “I hate to be the one to say this, but I really don’t think you should be sleeping in if you have a call time, babe… I don’t want to see you get in trouble because of me.”

“Mmm.. don’t care. Wanna stay here. Missed you.”

Rami chuckled. “I know, Ben, I’ve missed you too.” Ben responded with a soft grunt of agreement. Rami smiled into his hair. “Missed you so much…”

“Then let's just stay..” Ben whined, lifting his head and resting his chin on Rami’s chest. Beautiful blue eyes pleaded with Rami’s in the dim light of the room, beautiful even in the dark.

“Let’s just stay in today, Ram. No casting calls, no auditions, no go-sees. No… weirdos looking at me like I’m some sort of tasting menu on display… Please, I just want to spend the day with my boyfriend - who flew in last night just to surprise me - it's not too much to ask, right?… Please?”

Rami smiled wryly, caressing his boyfriend’s face with gentle fingers. He pulled him into a kiss, thinking that - honestly - Ben did have a point. After all, they just didn’t get moments like these too often anymore. Ever since Bohemian Rhapsody had premiered, going out had become trickier than usual - what with anonymity going out the window - as more and more people watched the movie and subsequently became fans, both of their characters and themselves.

It was easier when they were still filming, Rami mused. Back then, he and Ben could spend weeks in Ben’s flat - just the two of them and Frankie - and no one would bat an eye. But these days, the most they could do was sneak into each other’s hotel rooms during press tours - then try to stand as far away from each other as possible when it was time to face the media; all so no one would suspect a thing.

It was exhausting, but worth it.

Because while Rami loved the amount of response the film was getting, and how people were praising his performance as Freddie Mercury - he was especially proud of how fans were starting to appreciate Ben as more than just a pretty face. Yes, he found himself thinking, my boyfriend is an amazing performer, thank you. He’s not just someone with great abs or a great ass (which he did have, by the way). He's talented, and amazing. Did he mention that he was amazing? Because he is. Ben Hardy is amazing, and everyone needs to get with the program.

Honestly if he had the chance, Rami would probably make shameless proclamations about the true talent Ben was, on every platform and in any interview; the only reason he hasn't was because a single wrong word could risk outing them to the world.

Not that either of them were ashamed of being together. No, not at all.

It was just… it was a conversation they needed to have. For sure. But maybe not when they were both naked in bed, his beautiful boyfriend still cuddled up to him and making it clear that he couldn’t care less about the outside world at the moment.

Right here, right now - in this bed - it was just the two of them, and that was all that mattered.

Rami smiled. “Okay, babe,” he whispered, the gentlest of breaths against his Ben’s lips. “Okay. We can stay in today.”

Ben utterly beamed, smiling so brightly you’d think that sunlight was finally flooding into the room. In reality, they were still shrouded by half-light, the sun’s rays muted for the most part by Ben’s dark curtains. It made Rami’s features look darker than usual - the perfect opposite to Ben’s golden sunshine. Ben would never admit it, but he absolutely loved that about being with Rami. His personal dark prince; Ben wouldn’t trade it for the world.

He pulled Rami into another deep kiss, lips moving languidly against each other, then laid his head back down on the other man’s chest, enjoying the pure domesticity of it all.

The moment was broken though, once again, by the shrill cry of Ben’s phone.

Ben groaned loudly. It was just a message, but anything other than his boyfriend’s soothing voice while in the confines of his room was an abomination in his book.

He reluctantly moved from Rami’s hold, turning around to check his phone. It was from Joe, because of course it would be. He had sent a picture of he and Gwilym in their groupchat, showing the two of them out and about on the streets of New York. Bloody nerds.

Rami slid his arms around Ben’s waist, spooning and holding him close while pressing kisses onto his strong shoulders. “Hmmm… from Joe?”

Ben smiled, leaning back into Rami’s warmth. “Mhmm. I can’t believe he still thinks no one knows he fancies Gwil.”

“That’s Joe for you,” Rami chuckled, nuzzling the nape of Ben’s neck. Ben shivered from the sensation. “Did he ever tell you about that time he made an ass of himself in front of a hostess in Japan when he accidentally called Gwil his ‘beloved’?”

Ben grinned. “He didn’t!”

“Oh, he did. Then he tried to save face by saying how he meant Gwil was his 'best bro', or something. It was hilarious. A mess, but hilarious.”

Ben giggled.

Another notification came through, this time from Instagram. Ben swiped the app icon, opening it up to show the same picture, but now on Joe’s insta account.

[Not a reunion without the whole gang, but I guess I’ll live.]

Immediately the comments started pouring in. Ben scrolled through them, feeling that familiar sense of lowkey bitterness grow in his gut.

’@benhardy is going to be so upset when he sees this!’

'nooooo but what about @benhardy joe?!’

'gwilym out here cheating on his bf like that. @benhardy deserves better’

'leezzello tonight, but we all know hardzello is endgame @benhardy’

'it’s bad enough that rami’s with lucy, now gwilym’s all over joe?? ummm, @benhardy do you need company? cause you know… ;)’

'i guess it’s true then. if someone like @benhardy can’t make them stay, what hope is there? lol’

'y'all never show love for rami, shame on you. guess i’m gonna have to take one for the team… <3’

Ben slammed his phone down on the bed and smooshed his face into his pillow.

Great, his mood was utterly ruined. God, this was the absolute last thing he needed this morning. Here he was, trying to enjoy a simple morning with his boyfriend, and he had to go and be reminded that everyone still thought he was dating and/or cheating on either Joe or Gwil.

He huffed in frustration. It wasn’t exactly fun to be reminded that everyone basically thought he was a slag.

“Babe, what’s wrong? Ben?” Rami worriedly reached over Ben’s shoulder to check on his boyfriend, smoothing his hair away from his face. “Babe? Did something happen?” He tried to turn Ben back around, but the younger man refused to budge.

The thing was, Ben knew he was being petulant. He did, he wasn’t an idiot. He was 100% aware that he was equally to blame for the whole entire narrative that was he and Joe and Gwilym - supposedly being in some sort of love triangle.

It was all him.

And Joe.

And Gwil.

Although they never really meant anything by it; after all, Ben had never seen anything wrong with showing affection to your co-stars. He had done it before, with other cast-mates, and came away just fine.

So when the opportunities arose, he happily went along with all of Joe’s jokes, or Gwilym’s odd humor, and played up that notion about them being super close during filming, and even during breaks. They took pictures and videos, and shared them on social media. Joking about being in love and all that. It was all harmless humor.

But then, people - their fans - became truly invested, and well, here he was.

Because what people didn’t know, was that all the time he spent with Gwil and Joe, was to make up for - or even to hide - the fact that he couldn’t exactly show how much time he was spending with Rami.

All those pictures and videos of himself, running around with Gwilym or Joe; what really mattered was that at the end of the day, he would be able to snuggling up to Rami in bed while laughing about Gwil getting his wig stuck in things for the hundredth time, or just Joe and his mushroom perm.

It was great.

God, he still remembered how flustered he was when he first met Rami, having been a fan of his since he was a bloody teenager. The older man was so gracious with him, and so sweet, that it had honestly been hard to not fall head over heels for him. They were so different as people, from such wildly differing backgrounds; and yet they could talk for hours, about anything and everything under the sun. Rami never acted like he wasn’t interested in his what he had to say; always ready to humor his thoughts and offer his two cents. It was such an exhilarating experience for Ben - to be seen as an equal, and not as just another bloke with a pretty face.

So much so, that when they received the final script for Bohemian Rhapsody, Ben had been dismayed by how little Freddie and Roger interacted. They were bloody best friends, you bastards! And even after Graham explained everything to him, he still couldn’t help but feel a little bitter.

Here was a wealth of opportunities for him, as Roger, to spend even more time with Rami - and the film wasn’t allowing it.

Bollocks.

Rami - much like right now - had asked him about it later on; and somehow, someway, that conversation had turned into a confession, and long story short, he had been with Rami ever since.

Of course they didn’t tell anyone, mostly out of respect for professionalism, but as time went on, hiding their relationship became harder, and harder.

Just them sneaking around, pretending they didn’t want to spend every waking hour together; it had all seemed ideal when they started out. He even told Rami that he was okay with being secretive, if it meant he could be with him. But now... now he wondered it they would ever be more than just that - a secret.

A faint click sounded behind him, and suddenly he could feel more than see, the light of his bedside lamp fill his room. Ben finally relented and lifted his face from it’s hiding place, turning around to face Rami, eyes stormy and downcast.

Rami frowned, reaching up to trace the lines of Ben's tear-filled, bloodshot eyes. He sniffled, and concern immediately colored Rami’s features.

“Talk to me, Ben…”

Ben sighed, suddenly wishing he could run away from this conversation. It was as if the whole issue in his head suddenly seemed so... childish.

After all... it was just some harmless fun amongst the fans, right? It's not like anyone really means anything by it. It was just people being people on social media. It wasn’t a big deal.

Really.

“It’s nothing, Ram. ’s not a big deal.”

“Babe, if it’s upsetting you then it is a big deal. Come on, talk to me… I hate seeing you like this.”

Ben took Rami’s hand, loving how his boyfriend squeezed his fingers to reassure him. “I... it’s stupid, love.”

Rami sighed, giving Ben one of his looks. It was the look that said 'I need to fix this- help me fix this' . As if any of it was his fault.

Ben took a deep breath. “It’s just… the fans, again, I suppose. The whole… thing with Joe and Gwil... and me.”

Rami nodded. Of course he knew what Ben was talking about. He, like everyone else, were privy towards their antics during filming. He thought it was hilarious.

Then again, maybe he had misread something.

Ben continued, “It’s just that… everyone thinks I’m dating one of them, right? One or the other. And I know we’re the ones who started it - and I know that it’s just joking around - I know that. But then, sometimes they - the fans - they just… say things, like... like I’m some kind of two-timing whore who’s playing around with their feelings… and I just..”

Ben’s voice trailed off as he felt a weight lift off his chest. He was a little taken aback by how much this had actually been bothering him.

Oh.

He gripped Rami’s hand harder, holding on for dear life. He could see his boyfriend studying him, patiently waiting for him to finish saying his piece. He guessed it was now or never.

“I just… I hate that everyone thinks I’m some tart sleeping around with my friends, when the truth is…” He looked away from Rami’s eyes, color rising on his cheeks. “..when the truth is I’m perfectly happy with you. I… hate that I can’t just… tell everyone that they're wrong. That 'no, I am *not* dating Joe Mazzello or Gwilym Lee. I’m not… I’m..-”

Gentle fingers on his face brought his attention back to his boyfriend. Rami was gazing at him with teary eyes, a soft smile on his lips. His fingers gently traced the outline of his bottom lip, before cupping his cheek in his warm palm, and just holding him. As if Ben was the most precious thing Rami had ever been privileged to touch.

“Ben… are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

Ben swallowed, suddenly unsure. On one hand, he knew what he wanted. On the other hand… he really didn’t want to ruin this.

“I… I want to be able to tell them that I already have a boyfriend, thank you very much. And that he’s beautiful, and wonderful.” He covered Rami’s hand with his own, pressing a kiss into his palm. “Don't get me wrong, Ram, I don’t mind the joking… but I’m taken, and I want to be able to say that…”

Rami let out a breath of relief.

“Babe… I never thought… I just assumed…- I want that too, Ben. If you’re ready for it - and I mean really ready - then I’m ready to go there with you.”

Ben surged forward, pulling Rami into a deep kiss, heart beating out of his chest. Rami kissed him back with equal fervor, something inside of him unfurling and breaking free from it’s restraints. He let Ben take control, falling onto his back as the younger man straddled him, never breaking their kiss.

Rami pulled away from Ben with labored breath.“Get your phone,” he groaned, hands steadying the sway of Ben's hips. Ben quickly reached for the device he had discarded a few minutes ago, already having an inkling as of how they were going to do this.

Giggling, he unlocked the screen and pulled up the camera app, aiming it right at his boyfriend’s smiling face; his other hand moved to entwine with Rami’s on Rami’s chest.

He snapped the picture.

Once.

Twice.

Three times, because his boyfriend was gorgeous, alright.

He showed the pictures to Rami, who laughed at the shitty lighting. Ben couldn't care less, because the point was that it showed more than enough, and the anticipation of finally sharing their relationship with the world was making him giddy.

“Wait, let me take one too!” Rami took the phone from Ben’s hand, switching the camera to selfie mode. He then tugged Ben off of him so he could lie down beside him. Ben chuckled as he arranged himself into a totally-candid-and-not-staged-position beside his boyfriend, arm wrapped around the older man’s torso, face resting nicely on his shoulder.

Looking into the camera together, Rami snapped the shot.

One, with he and Ben perfectly in frame together.

Twice, with Ben kissing his cheek.

And three times, with Ben's laughing face buried in the crook of Rami’s neck, his elated smile just barely visible in the blur of motion.

Rami smiled a smile of his own, holding his boyfriend close.

They were really going to do this, huh?

Ben grinned excitedly at him, like a child before Christmas, when he took his phone back, swiping through the photos. Rami felt his heart, honest to god, flutter.

Yep. Guess they were.

A few lifelong minutes later - a.k.a after Ben had painstakingly picked two of his favorite pictures out of the bunch - Rami hovered over Ben's shoulder as his boyfriend uploaded the photos onto his instagram. His heart skipped a beat when he saw Ben write out his caption, then tag him; and then just like that, the reality of their lives never being the same again from that day forward, truly dawned on him.

The moment of truth; Ben hit 'Share'.

The minute the post finished uploading, Ben shut his phone off and put it back on the nightstand. Confused, Rami opened his mouth to ask, but Ben just moved to straddle his boyfriend once again.

"What?" the blonde said coyly, feigning innocence. "Did we not agree to spend the day in? I don't know about you, Ram, but in my book, spending the day in includes not caring about what the world has to say about my relationship."

Rami laughed out loud, hands back on his boyfriend's hips; of course, again, his Ben had a point.

Around them, Rami noted how the room suddenly seemed brighter - the air so much more lighter. Part of him knew it was because they were still in bed way past sunrise; but another part of him was certain that it was because of the difference in Ben.

Ben, who seemed happier. Ben, who seemed more at ease.

Rami smirked. "Well, then. Who am I to argue with that? Any ideas, babe?"

Ben raised an eyebrow, bottom lip between his teeth.

"Oh, don't worry, babe... I can definitely think of a few."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

@benhardy has posted a photoset.

[Picture 1: ] [Black and white.] [A man, pictured from chin to lower chest, lying down on a bed, shirtless.] [His left hand is holding on to the photographer's hand, clutched together on the man's chest.] [Over his heart.]

[Picture 2:] [Black and white.] [Close-up of that man, laughing while looking into the camera, blurry with motion.] [Another man laying next to him, face turned into the smiling man's neck, toothy smile barely discernible through the blur.] [They're clearly in love.]

[Caption: "He's mine. Sod off."]

[tagged: @ramimalek]

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

'Oh my god'

'OHMIGODDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!'

'OMG OMG OMG!!!! RIP ME WTFFFFFFF'

'Ben and RAMI?! How did we not see it???? Ohmigod MY HEARTTTTTT'

'WAIT WHAAAAAAAT'

'BEN HARDY RAMI MALEK BEN FUCKING HARDY RAMI EFFIN' MALEK WHAT IS AHEPPENING I CAN'T OMGGGGG'

'GAHHHHHHHH!!!! MY FAVES!! My faves are dating JESUS CHRIST GOD IS REALLL'

'We stan. We FUCKING STAN. KING AND KING, YAAAS BITCH!!'

'gUYS I'M gonNNA CRYYYY! They look so good together <3'

'hardzello stans and hardlee stans don't comment. THIS IS A HARLEK APRRECIATION ZONE. (yes, bitch i went there)'

'omg HARLEK, YAAAAAAAAAS!!!'

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

@joe_mazello liked your photo.

@joe_mazzello: I fucking knew it. I FUCKING KNEW IT. @mrgwilymlee YOU OWE ME.

@mrgwilymlee liked your photo.

@mrgwilymlee: @joe_mazzello I'M AS SURPRISED AS YOU, THANK YOU. Wow. You bastards. Congratulations, I'm happy for you. But STILL.

@joe_mazello: you're just jealous he got to Ben before you did. Admit it, sir.

@mrgwilymlee: You wish, Joseph. If anything, I'm jealous that he got to Rami first. That's one pretty man...

@joe_mazzello: you know, now that you mention it...

@benhardy: Yeah. That caption. It's for the two of you. @joe_mazzello @mrgwilymlee Hands off.

@ramimalek liked your comment.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

#ben/rami #rami/ben #harlek #wow this ended up being the longest oneshot i've ever written #anyway i hope you guys like it #this is my gift to you #i love you all

[yoon-kooks]

Two Tones of a Tabby- pt.I

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader 

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Bildungsroman, Idol!Taehyung 

Summary: Upon graduating from university, you embark on your first and last summer adventure to explore the wonders of the world with complete independence before becoming confined to a cubicle when autumn begins. But as fate would have it, a chance encounter with a troubled idol in search of his own kind of freedom threatens the solo aspect of your trip. 

Word Count: 2.4k 

Parts: I II III IV V

A/N: this was supposed to be a lengthy oneshot, but i guess itll be another series instead (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻  and im screaming at myself for being extra enough to write bildungsroman as the genre. it’s basically just a fancy term for coming-of-age and the longest word in my vocabulary LMAO.

T is for Taehyung 

“travel diary entry #1- it’s 5pm, been stuck at incheon since like 6 in the morning and nothing remotely interesting has happened because this is a fucking airport. if there’s one more flight delay, i think i’m going to combust.”

With a sigh, you drop your pen between the first two pages of your journal to reveal a red cover with tiny tigers running across it. The first spontaneous purchase of your vacation is already proving its worth through the countless flight delays you’ve had to endure thus far. Your mother would’ve told the younger version of yourself not to waste money on a journal at an overpriced airport kiosk unless you were going to write in every single page from beginning to end. Maybe you wouldn’t have made use of such a sentimental object as a child, but as time went on, you’ve grown. Besides, no one’s here to stop you and your rash decisions. You’re on your own.

Or so you think.

All at once, a rush of humans and cameras flood the airport walkway that had been otherwise quiet for the past 11 hours. You notice some young folks get up from their seats with their phone cameras ready to get a better view of whoever it is. A celebrity? You’d get up off your ass to check out what the big deal is, but honestly, you have no idea what all the youngsters are into nowadays. Maybe that’s your own fault for paying more attention to your studies and workload than pop culture and current events. So you decide to stay back and eat your slice of pizza that had gone cold as you were busy writing.

Even from afar, you can see the huge moving cluster of people and bombardment of camera flashes. Is that even legal? Does personal space not exist when you’re a celebrity? Do celebrities ever grow tired of not being able to live freely? Those are the thoughts you have as you munch on your dinner.

Mid-bite, you watch as a black mullet pops up from the crowd with a few sleepy waves. You could swear, for just an instant, he makes eye contact with you, the only person sitting that far away from the chaos. His dark eyes reflect something more—something beyond what the rest of his nonchalant body language shows. With half of your pizza hanging out of your mouth, you give him a polite wave with crumby fingers, although you’re sure he had already looked away by then.

And just like that, the airport finds peace once more. You wonder if you should pull out your journal and write another entry about your fateful encounter with an unknown celebrity who accidentally made eye contact with you for 0.3 seconds.

Beep! “Attention: Now boarding, Flight 1230.” You leap off your seat as soon as you hear that your flight hasn’t been delayed for the thousandth time. Checking twice to make sure you aren’t leaving any of your belongings behind, you lug your carry-on bag with you to the boarding area.

Finally, your solo trip has begun.

Once you’re settled into your seat on the plane, you try to remember what the fuck you were thinking about before boarding. Ah yes, your eye contact with Mr. Celebrity. How could you forget?

You dig through your bag and pull out your tiger journal. For a good minute, you just stare at it, having an internal debate on whether or not to waste a page on another dumb event at the airport. Nah. It’s too late now. Maybe if he was a celebrity you knew, your heart would’ve leapt, and only then would it be worth recording into your journal. But you’d rather leave space for memories that perhaps hold more weight to you.

All that remains engraved in your mind from the occurrence are the boy’s eyes. They were fill with darkness as if they were hiding a secret of some sort, and he had awfully beautiful eyelashes that could be seen from a mile away. So for the sake of it, you draw just his eyelashes, which look mildly creepy on their own beneath your entry on the flight delays.

For the rest of the flight, you try to rid yourself of that one instance and get some rest, but for some reason, it’s more difficult than it should be. As much as you’d like to think of yourself as someone with a carefree personality, little things like this actually bug you quite a bit.

Something about the whole thing is unsettling. You aren’t sure if it’s because of the bombardment of cameras, the lack of personal space, the troubled look in the boy’s eyes, or the fact that that was the most action you’d gotten all day. But nonetheless, something just feels off.

Perhaps the only way you’re able to find peace is by telling yourself that there’s nothing you can do about it. The boy doesn’t know you, you don’t know him, and that’s that. You just want to enjoy your trip and not have to worry about anything—especially not a boy.

So you close your eyes and dream of all the yummy food you’ll eat over the course of your adventures. That's the only travel plan you have so far. Everything else will happen as it comes.

-

After the long flight, the first thing you do is stretch and breath in some fresh air. The sky is blue and the morning sun is radiating down on your jet-lagged body. As much as you’d love to find a hotel to rid yourself of your bulky luggage and take a nap, you don’t have time for that. You’re eager to explore, and that alone is already more than enough to energize your mind and soul.

You wander around the streets in search of the no.1 thing on your mind: food. Rather than use a GPS or Yelp, you leave it up to your intuition and stomach. And somehow, you’re led into an empty café with fancy coffees and desserts.

To give off the least amount of touristy vibes, you shove your luggage beneath the table for two and begin to browse your food options. You lowkey want to eat everything that’s pictured on the menu, but you have to remind yourself that you still have a long trip ahead of you, so there’ll most definitely be plenty of other opportunities for good food. After careful consideration, you settle on an iced mocha and a slice of strawberry sponge cake. A caffeine and sugar rush can’t hurt.

As you wait for your food, you wonder why the café is so empty. Perhaps it has a bad review on Yelp and you would’ve known that if you’d just checked your phone. Maybe the food quality is shit, or maybe the service is terrible, or maybe they know something that you don’t. Oops.

But it takes less than five minutes for your food to be served with Instagram-quality presentation. The strawberry sponge cake looks moist and delicate with pink flower sprinkles that glisten in the sunlight, and the mocha has a cute kitten drawn on the handcrafted foam. But to be honest, you kind of care more about the taste—which is also surprisingly quite delicious by your standards.

You suppose you shouldn’t worry as long as the food tastes good, so you pull out your journal again and write another entry as you enjoy your breakfast.

“travel diary entry #2: got off the plane, stopped at a cute café with no one in it, which is lowkey shady, but whatever. the food tastes good lol. oh and the mocha has a kitten drawn on it to match the tigers on this journal. is this what they call fate?? LMAO jkjkjkjkjk-”

“I’ll order what that customer is eating—except no coffee, please,” a soft and mellow voice interrupts your train of thought. You had been so absorbed in your food and writing that you didn’t realize another customer had appeared. Maybe the café isn’t so shady after all. Your intuition hasn’t failed you.

As you take a sip of your mocha, you casually glance over at the table across from where you’re seated and nearly spit out your entire drink—not because it tastes bad, but because you recognize the long eyelashes. It’s the eyelash boy from the airport.

Between bites of your cake, you keep sneaking peeks at the boy, who’s actually a lot more handsome now that you can see his features up close. With his loosely styled hair, his expensive yet questionable taste in fashion, and his gorgeous looks, there’s no doubt he holds some sort of fame status.

Apparently you’ve stared for too long because he catches you and deadass rolls his eyes. As if you’re doing something wrong.

“If you’re waiting for an autograph or something, you aren’t getting one,” he finally says to you. An autograph? You don’t even know who the fuck this guy is, and he thinks you want his autograph?

“Excuse me?” You narrow your eyes at the celebrity.

“I know you’re one of the fans from the airport. You waved at me with pizza hanging out of your mouth.” You’re half embarrassed by the fact that he witnessed The Great Pizza Incident, and half offended by the fact that he called you a “fan”. Because you’re certainly no fan of his.

“Last time I checked, I was sitting at this café before you, so there’s no need for you to assume I’m one of your crazed fans who follow you around everywhere.”

“And yet, somehow out of all the places in the world, you happen to travel to the same exact city as me,” he scoffs. “Don’t pretend like this is a coincidence.” His thick-skulled ass doesn’t believe you, and you can’t believe it. What did you do to deserve this?

“If you think I somehow found your schedule and took this vacation for the sole purpose of seeing my favorite celebrity, then you’re either paranoid or way too conceited,” you say. “I don’t even know who you are, or why there were so many fans chasing you around the airport. I’m just here to enjoy my trip, so leave me the fuck out of your problems.” It comes out a little harsher than you’d like, but hopefully it’ll get the point across that you aren’t a fan blinded by love.

Out of shock, the boy just blinks at you. He’s probably not used to being scolded straight to his pretty face. But he deserved it, and to your surprise, he apologizes.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to take out my frustrations on you,” he pulls back and bites his lip, “especially when you chose to stay away from the airport chaos.” At least he’s willing to own up to his mistakes.

“It’s fine… I’m not actually that mad… I just didn’t want to be wrongly accused of being a stalker, you know?” You soften your expression to ease the tension. “Besides, I’m sure it happens to you all the time.”

He nods in silence as he stares down at his strawberry cake. It seems celebrities do get overwhelmed and sick of living with no privacy. Maybe this boy just happens to have reached his tipping point.

“Look, I’m sorry you have to deal with constant bullshit like that. Everyone deserves the freedom and space to do whatever they wish (as long as it’s legal),” you say, finishing off your last bite of cake. “That’s actually the reason I decided to take this solo vacation—to take time away for myself!” You aren’t sure why you share this last bit of information with the boy, especially when you hadn’t told any friend or family about your spontaneous trip, but it just feels right to let him know that he’s not the only one in search of a liberation of some sort.

“I wish I could be a free spirit like you,” he chuckles for the first time, and it’s really fucking cute. “Maybe that’s why I’m taking this trip too—to loosen up a bit and do what I want, rather than conform to what the world expects of me.”

“Well you aren’t off to a great start, to be honest,” you tease him as you receive the bill from your waiter. As soon as you see how much you have to pay, your mouth forms a big O because you realize why the café is so empty. It costs you a lot more than you’d like to spend on some coffee and cake. But despite the overpriced food, you don’t feel terrible about your stay.

Just as you’re about to get up to pay at the register, you’re blocked by the boy who’s suddenly trying to act like a gentleman. “Let me pay for it… as an apology for interrupting your breakfast. And by the way, who eats cake for breakfast?”

“You ordered the same thing as me!” This guy is unbelievable, but also amusing. “And it’s fine. I may not be a celebrity like you, but I can pay for my own food. Thanks anyway, Mr. Celebrity.” You smile at him before making your payment at the counter. Something about his cute frown from the rejection makes you die a little.

“Then let me take you out,” he blurts out, perhaps on the spur of the moment. “I-I mean… unless you have plans later.”

You take a long moment to stare at the boy who had accused you of being a stalker less than an hour ago. Oh how the tables have turned. The spontaneity of travelling with someone you just met certainly will spice up your adventure—for better or worse. Somewhere in you, a fire is lit. So you shake your head, “I don’t have any plans. After all, I’m a free spirit as you like to call me.”

“Then what would you like to be called?”

“Y/N.”

“Right. Y/N. Then… I’m T?”

“T? Is that what your real name starts with?” you chuckle. “And why do you sound so suspicious?”

“Wait, you really don’t know who I am?”

“I really fucking don’t.”

You hear him mumble something about fires and deoxyribonucleic acid, as if you should get the references. But you suppose you’re too much of an uncultured swine to pick up what he’s putting down.

“Good.” For some reason, he looks relieved that you’re unaware of his celebrity self. “Just call me Taehyung then.”

#bts scenarios #bts fanfic #bts angst #bts fluff #taehyung fanfic #bts imagines #taehyung x reader #taehyung #v #bts #bangtan #two tones of a tabby

[baekhvuns]

Not the violence on Hwa's neck, please he boy is delicate. ;( (my phone auto corrected delicate to delicious - so true phone)

I saw another version of the lawyer meme actually more accurate imo, Seonghwa was in Mingi's place, cause let's face it he would start crying 100%. And Hongjoong was with Jongho, I actually think Joong would either go all in or end up in jail. But Woo is very accurate, not only he won't defend you but he will become your cell mate. 🤡

All these videos of Woo and Yeo holding Seonghwa WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN?! I weigh less than him and have noodle arms, so no chance for me, but a girl can dream. Femboy Hwa let me hold your hwaist, uwu.

That's what I'm saying, why ask for all this pain?! Modern Hwa could've been the main slayer, but instead he was a flop, I ROOTED FOR YOU YOU DUMB ASS BITCH! Nah, I will not forgive him either.

Also I saw one anon talking about kids and I actually wanted to mention them before but forgot: don't wanna be all FUCK THEM KIDS again, but kinda... you know. 😅 I forgot they were in the story, sometimes they'd mention them and I was like "ah, yeah the children" but I'm glad they didn't play a big role, not only because of my own preferences but for poor Y/n's sake, she was already head over heals for the ancient cock she didn't need her maternal instincts to kick in in full force. But not gonna lie, I almost thought she'd become pr*gn*nt with their 3rd child, hahhahaa.

Omg, so TWO SEONGHWA'S?! May I ask why a jaguar in particular? Hsysusjsjsysishs. Was there any jaguar Hwa content I missed? Actually had to google cause I always mistake jaguars and leopards. I should get more educated on cat species.

No but I've seen a lot of cat boys, cause for some reason I tend to bias them... can you believe, I wonder why hmmm. But Seonghwa is one of the most dedicated ones, seriously I said "if he does the ears hairstyle he's gone and I'm gone" AND HE DID. Also his meows??? What's wrong with him and why does he literally sound like a cat. Was there a hybrid Hwa fic somewhere on tumblr or did I make it up, lol?

NOT Seonghwa saying "good morning" when I'm about to go to sleep, the jet lag is real, also why does he always post when I'm messaging you, huh? - DV 💖

HELLO!!

Not the violence on Hwa's neck, please he boy is delicate. ;( (my phone auto corrected delicate to delicious - so true phone)

live footage of me chasing hwa for a neck slap and him doing this EXACT THING TNWHFJWHDJ

I saw another version of the lawyer meme actually more accurate imo, Seonghwa was in Mingi's place, cause let's face it he would start crying 100%. And Hongjoong was with Jongho, I actually think Joong would either go all in or end up in jail. But Woo is very accurate, not only he won't defend you but he will become your cell mate. 🤡

FBWNDHKWDHKW HONGJOONG IN JAIL ayo what about an au where a ex-lawyer hong was falsely imprisoned and a rival lawyer has to get him out <3 👁👄👄👄👁

All these videos of Woo and Yeo holding Seonghwa WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN?! I weigh less than him and have noodle arms, so no chance for me, but a girl can dream. Femboy Hwa let me hold your hwaist, uwu.

YEAH HELLO WHERE GFWNDHWJ WHEN IS IT MY TURN TO BE HAPPY 😭😭😭😭 femboy hwa 😩😩😩😩 manhandle him and I’ll him closer by the loops of his pants and he’s gone, melts, in the knees 😮‍💨😮‍💨

That's what I'm saying, why ask for all this pain?! Modern Hwa could've been the main slayer, but instead he was a flop, I ROOTED FOR YOU YOU DUMB ASS BITCH! Nah, I will not forgive him either.

BFNWBDNS RIGHT EXACTLY BFBWBD MODERN HWA WAS A FLOP unless he has a redemption arc in pt.2 that’ll never happen ☺️☺️ see there’s a difference between cock and a dick, cock was fossil hwa, and a dick was modern hwa 🔫

Also I saw one anon talking about kids and I actually wanted to mention them before but forgot: don't wanna be all FUCK THEM KIDS again, but kinda... you know. 😅 I forgot they were in the story, sometimes they'd mention them and I was like "ah, yeah the children" but I'm glad they didn't play a big role, not only because of my own preferences but for poor Y/n's sake, she was already head over heals for the ancient cock she didn't need her maternal instincts to kick in in full force. But not gonna lie, I almost thought she'd become pr*gn*nt with their 3rd child, hahhahaa.

BFMWDBKS NO YEAH I GET IT 😭😭😭 yeah i think if i focused on the children too much they’d steal the spotlight SHICH THEY ALREADY DID THEY WERE BITING EACH OTHER???? HELLO???? DEMONS???? miss y/n rly went thru a lot and she never had her love life get better,,,, bc if she’s in love with hwa why would she go and actively be with someone whOS NOT HIM 😭😭😭

my maternal instincts exist only for seonghwa <3

Omg, so TWO SEONGHWA'S?! May I ask why a jaguar in particular? Hsysusjsjsysishs. Was there any jaguar Hwa content I missed? Actually had to google cause I always mistake jaguars and leopards. I should get more educated on cat species.

YES TWO SEONGHWAS FBWNDB jaguar in particular bc they’re so scary looking but r the sweetest ones and their eyes??? AND SO PRETTY THEYRE SO REGAL ITS LITERALLY HWA SHSJD I WAS THINKING OF JUST DOING HWA AS A PANTHER OR LEOPARD BUT JAGUAR there’s something abt them 🤌🏼 i even have a mood board of it too

No but I've seen a lot of cat boys, cause for some reason I tend to bias them... can you believe, I wonder why hmmm. But Seonghwa is one of the most dedicated ones, seriously I said "if he does the ears hairstyle he's gone and I'm gone" AND HE DID. Also his meows??? What's wrong with him and why does he literally sound like a cat. Was there a hybrid Hwa fic somewhere on tumblr or did I make it up, lol?

sUcH a SuRPiSe oMg fbwnbfwndhjd it’s always the ones who look the most terrifying intimidatingly hot in the hottest way that act like cats are the ones im attracted too ☺️☺️ HES GONE IM GONE FBDBDBDB his paper ears and the meows 😭😭😭😭 i feel like there was a san one!!! he was a cat one i think it’s in my fic rec tag!!

NOT Seonghwa saying "good morning" when I'm about to go to sleep, the jet lag is real, also why does he always post when I'm messaging you, huh? - DV 💖

HENWHDKWHDKW DID U SEE THE FUCKIKG PHOTO IM SCRWMSHFNQHMFHQKDHW convinced he’s a moot and only comes love when he knows ur gonna send an ask in so we can cry over it and he sees it 🔫

#✉️ : ask #dv 💖 anon

[jesusbarnes-blog]

What We Created (8)

Sebastian Stan x Reader (pregnancy series)

Summary: A one nightstand with the one and only Sebastian Stan changes your life and his forever

Word count: 2,406

Warning: fluff, a whole bunch of fluff to make up for the angst :D

A/N: A better and longer part lol.. sorry the crap that part 7 is. The part where Sebastian and the reader kiss in bed is totally from a Stalia scene. I couldn’t resist! It was so cute! 2 parts left!

What We Created Masterlist 

You froze when you heard Sebastian's voice, the smile on your face fading into a look of fear. You weren't upset at Sebastian anymore, finally coming to your senses and deciding to give him a chance. You decided instead of calling him, you'd just come see him. Thanks to his mother for helping you. But one thing you hadn't thought of was, what in the hell were you going to say? You were extremely embarrassed by your actions, ignoring Sebastian and leaving him in the dark for two weeks. You were having a child, you shouldn't be acting like one anymore. Do you apologize or let him explain himself and then apologize? You had to think fast because Sebastian was staring at you as if he were ready to jump on you and pull you into the biggest bear hug ever. "Hi Sebastian." You whispered, holding your jacket in your hand and waving shyly with the other one. Before he could reply, his mother excused herself from the house with a smile on her face, claiming she needed to pick some things up from the store. She actually wanted to give you and Sebastian time to talk to each other privately and work out your issues. An uncomfortable silence followed after the door closed, you standing awkwardly at the door and Sebastian across from you with an this is unbelievable look on his face. "Y/N.. I had no idea you were coming. Why didn't you tell me?" Sebastian asked, breaking the silence and offering his hand. You gave a questioning look but took it anyways, allowing him to lead you to the living room where he made you sit on the couch. You looked around, noticing cute photos of Sebastian from when he was a child. Diverting your attention back to the man sitting next you, you sighed before you began. "I don't really know how to say this or what I should even say. I guess what I mean is I'm sorry for ignoring you for so long. I realize how immature it was now. We aren't together so you can date whoever you want and I don't have the right to be upset about it- I just though that-" Before you could continue on with your rambling Sebastian silence you with his large hand grabbing your small one, the other one grabbing your chin gently and making you look at him. "Y/N, I don't want to be with anyone else. That day when I was going to kiss you, it's because I want to be with you. When my ex showed up she did kiss me but you didn't stick around to see me shove her off me. I haven't talked to Laura since we broke up. I was surprised myself to see on my doorstep that day." You opened your mouth to speak, to apologize for your behavior again but were stopped by Sebastian. "I should have done this a while ago.." Sebastian paused before he continued. He was nervous to say his true feelings but knew there wasn't a better time then now. So he pushed the fear deep down and calmed his shaking hand before continuing. "The truth is.." He looked at your face, your eyes looking so deeply into his, eyebrows furrowed, concentrating on every word coming out his mouth. You looked so damn beautiful to him. "I love you. Not just because you're having my child, but because you're an amazing woman Y/N. Remember that time when you asked me to get you frozen yogurt from the store and I came back with actual Frozen yogurt? You laughed remembering that day very clearly. "Please tell me this is what you meant when you said frozen yogurt?" Sebastian asked, coming into the kitchen of his New York apartment, out of breath from walking in the cold air outside. "Well show me it and then I can decide." You chuckled, turning down the stove and turning to face the blue eyed Romanian. You couldn't hold back you laughter when Seb pulled out a box of actual Frozen yogurt.   "Sebastian Stan. You are going to be the death of me. You know what?" You said as you made your way over to him. Not caring if he still had his coat on, you pulled him into a hug. "That's exactly what I wanted. Thank you." You whispered into his coat, a small smile spreading across your face when you felt him hug you back. " I knew I had gotten the wrong kind but you laughed anyway and told me I didn't, just so I wouldn't feel bad. God I felt like such an idiot that day. I knew I loved you then." Sebastian laughed, running his hand down his face and smiling. "Hey well at least I knew you were just as childish as me. And we watched Frozen that night." "I feel bad for our child." You both laughed together before silence followed again. But this time it wasn't awkward or uncomfortable, you both felt at peace, having finally made up with each other.   You placed your jacket at the edge of the couch before grabbing Sebastian's hand and placing it on your belly. "We both missed you and if you want, I'd like to make things work. I know it's my fault but if you're willing to put up with me then I want to give this a second chance." Your voice cracked, tears filling your eyes and sliding down your cheeks. Your guilt was getting to you, eating you alive. "I don't think I want anything more then to be with you and raise our child together. I missed you so much Y/N.." Sebastian's voice trailed off and his eyes widened when he felt a kick and you chuckled. You felt the baby kicking a lot of over the past two weeks but Sebastian hadn't felt it in a while. You couldn't help but smile at the look on his face. "Did the baby just..? The baby kicked!" He laughed before he got down on his knees in front of you. He lifted your shirt up to reveal your stomach and with both his hands placed on your belly, he began placing kisses all over it. "Don't worry baby, I missed you too." You smiled, thinking this, your little family was going to work. Even if it wasn't perfect, it was yours.. And you weren't going to do anything again to mess that up. 

_______

You and Sebastian sat next to each other on the plane hand in hand, feeling more happy then you did the past few weeks. You both decided to leave Romanian the same day you gotten there. Sebastian made his mother promise to be there when it was time for the baby to come and it didn't take much convincing. She was eager to become a grandmother and the fact that she loved you made it ten times more better. "So when do you want to do this?" You asked looking over at Seb who was already looking at you with a love struck face. You blushed under his intense gaze before smiling. "Whenever you're ready. I think it's time they know, even though I'm sure they already do." You laughed and nodded "You're right. We do it when we get back in New York?" "When we get back in New York." His voice got lower as he looked at you. "What?" You asked, full on blushing by now and Sebastian found the whole thing amusing. "Nothing, you're just so beautiful." ______ The flight was a long one but thankfully when you landed at JFK it was around 3am so there were no paparazzi around. You and Sebastian took a cab back to the apartment and as soon as you got inside you dropped on the couch with an exhausted sigh and closed your eyes. Sebastian laughed before turning on the light and bending down in front of you, taking off your jacket and then your shoes.  He was jet lagged himself but that didn't stop him from helping you. "Thank you." You whispered, watching his movements with so much love in your heart. When you were undressed down to just your panties and shirt, he began to undress himself. Once you two got to the bedroom you were both out like a light, legs tangled, Sebastian's body behind you and hand placed protectively on your belly. _______ You woke up at around 4 pm, Sebastian still sleeping like a baby behind you. His grip was tight on you so it took you a minute to get from underneath him. You looked at his sleeping form, a small smile spreading across your face. He had turned and laid on his back, pulling your pillow into his chest and cuddling it. His hair was a mess and his mouth was slightly open, letting out soft snores. You had to bite back a laugh, not wanting to wake him and ruin the moment. Being as gentle and quiet as you can, you turned your body so you were facing him. Slowly you reached forward and ran the back of your hand down his scuffed cheek, your eyes studying his face. If someone had told you 5 years ago that you'd be working with your celebrity crush on a Marvel movie you'd tell them no way. If they told you that you'd end up pregnant by him you'd tell them they were out of their minds. But it all happened and God you were the happiest you had ever been. You couldn't believe you almost ruined everything over a misunderstanding. Sebastian did love you and he wanted to be with you. He was having a child with you. You two live together. At first it was all too much to take in and now you couldn't get enough of this feeling. Yeah.. You could get used to waking up to this every morning. You smirked and bit your lip, running your hand through his hair and back down his face until you reached his mouth. Slowly, you ran your thumb across his soft, pink, bottom lip. But were you really ready to confirm that you in fact were carrying Sebastian's child? There was no denying you were pregnant, everyone around knew that from the pictures the paparazzi had caught of you on your way to the airport. But you nor Sebastian had ever confirmed it was true you two were having a child together. A lot of people guessed it was, but were you ready to let them know it was? You had to think about the good that came with it. Of course you'd get hate but the love you'd receive would overpower that. Then you and Sebastian could do what real parents do and finally shop for your baby without worrying about being caught. Maybe even have a baby shower before you gave birth. Something small with your close friends and family. You smiled to yourself thinking about this. You would finally be able to do everything you'd been dying to do since you finished filming Infinity War. You were going to do this. You and Sebastian were going to announce the pregnancy together  through Instagram. You both agreed to do it as soon as you got back to New York and now there was no going back. Far too lost in your thoughts, you didn't even notice Sebastian fighting back the smile forming on his lips. That was until he couldn't hold his laugh in anymore. Your eyes widened when you realized he had been awake the whole time and you quickly removed your hand from his face. "How long have we've been asleep?" He asked, ignoring the flabbergasted look on your face as he placed a hand on your belly. He had one blue eye open, looking at you with a raised eyebrow. "13 hours.." You whispered, moving and  sitting on your knees on the side of him with a shy smile. "Hmm." He smiled before reaching up and touching your cheek. He open both eyes and looked at your lips before fixing his eyes back on you with a smirk. Before you could even say anything, he pulled your face down to his and finally.. After MONTHS, his lips reconnected with yours, and man did you love it. You could feel the butterflies in your stomach spread all over your body. You had waited for this for so long, that when you finally got it, it was like all the stress from the day you caught his ex kissing him until now had been replaced with nothing but happiness that was all pure. And fuck, Sebastian felt the same goddamn way. You pulled away with a moan and a smirk on your face. "I haven't even brushed my teeth yet." You joked, although you really hadn't. "I don't care." He smiled and pulled you down from another kiss, making you laugh out loud. _____ Later that day around 6 pm, you found Sebastian and yourself lazing on the couch with a bowl of popcorn, watching Star Wars: A New Hope. Although you both had seen the movie far too many times to count, you were into as if it was your first time watching. You were both huge nerds, one of the many things you had in common.   "Do you think the baby will like Star Wars?" Sebastian asked, running his hand down yours legs that were on his lap. "It's scientifically impossible for them not to. I mean, look at us." You winked at him before turning your attention back to the TV, not before Sebastian paused it. "Y/N I was thinking.. I know we said that we wanted to wait to find out but I was thinking it would be nice if we opened that paper and found out the gender of the baby now. That way when we-" "Announce it on Instagram we can say the gender too?" You chuckled, finish the sentence for him. "Yeah.. that. Did you?" He gave you a suspicious look before he smiled and pulled you so that you were seated directly on his lap and wrapped his arms around you. "I had the same idea in mind plus I'm far too impatient to wait. I wanted to know for a while now." "Then what are we waiting for?" His eyes sparkled as he looked into yours. 

Are you excited to find out the baby’s gender and fans reaction? Let me know here! Boy or girl?   

tags:  @sebstan01 @crownie-sr @nennesse @super-who-trek @bethabear12 @topkay @veronicachen143 @yougottalovefandoms @glitterintheairblog @xxchexchickxx @harleyscheekheart @jade-cheshire @nennesse @randomchick555-555 @kcsavege4134 @chameerah @rachelle-on-the-run @borderline-person @ria132love @mymindplayshopscotch @goldwanderer @learisa @gingerbatchwife @accidentally-in-hell @barnes-toddpartnersinheartbreak @nikkisprojectoflife @gallifreyansass @nazaninnsh @bad-wolf87 @frolicsomefawkes @violeata @the-amaranthine @sexyvixen7 @imamoose @supersoldier-buckybarnes @watsonwise @iamwarrenspeace @calilycal

(Tagging is closed. I’m very sorry)

#Sebastian Stan #sebastian stan x reader #dad!Sebastian #marvel #Romania #sebastian stan fluff #x reader #fanfic #what we created #Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #the winter soldier

[friendlyoceangiant-blog]

Red String of Fate

Leave “Red String of Fate” in my inbox… To see what is in our muse’s destinies then I’ll write a drabble for it. Note: I’m putting all under readmore bc length (or any other reason), numbers are on the bottom for a surprise, and i’ll make use of any AU I can to make these work.

Blue eyes opened up to stare up at the ceiling of his new dorm room. He finally moved everything in and he ended up taking a nap because he was tired. The jet lag was killing him right now. The dream he just had was one of his usual eerily realistic dreams. Most people have dreams of past lives or things to come in the future right? If not that, they’re just having some weird nonsense dream like they are riding a bull at a rodeo. No siree, not Mizumachi Kengo! He dreams of past events of things that have happened to other people. 

He’s never come across himself, but he has gone to visit his friends, or he would go and walk around to come across people he’s never seen before. In particular, he’d come across someone who had blue hair. Seemed to be an idol of some kind given the way people were fussing over him.

Surprisingly, he had a good amount of male fans, wouldn’t you know? Though with how cute he was, that was kind of understandable. Still, wasn’t that a bit much though? He obviously looked very uncomfortable! Woaaah, what is that guy doing? Dude, you can’t just touch people like that. Even footballers ask before we ask to feel each other’s muscles! Gotta admire them pecs, am I right?

Seriously though, this guy had a good number of male fans. Really avid male fans by the looks of things. Mizumachi normally kept himself out of things because he somehow instinctively knew that he had to keep a low profile. Though his brain couldn’t comprehend it, his instincts knew the truth. He was not dreaming– but he was somehow actually in the past right now. He was watching an idol from Yumenosaki getting bothered by his… very avid male fans.

Though his instincts were screaming at him to stay away, Mizumachi was not one to think about consequences. Nor was he the type of person to ignore someone in their time of need!

Sorry dude, but put up with him for a bit okay? Mizumachi dashed into the crowd, and grabbed the much smaller male into his arm and just ran off with him like he were some adorable human football.

What? He’s a footballer through and through! This is the only way he knows to carry people!

After he made sure that they were safe from the fans (while he also was conveniently ignoring the screams and pleas of the person in his arms to be let down), Mizumachi set the guy down. “Sorry about that dude. I’m Mizumachi Kengo, a footballer. I saw that you were being bothered by them so I kinda just had to step in, ya know? I hope I didn’t scare ya too much.”

Curiously, he looked the small teen over to make sure that he wasn’t injured or anything. No injuries to fuss over here! That’s great! A small fuzzy feeling in his head told him that he was going to be waking up soon.

“Ah. I gotta go. You should call your friends and have them pick you up. Don’t go back there to get mobbed again.” With a wave, Mizumachi ran off, because his instincts told him too.

It wouldn’t do to suddenly disappear out of thin air where there were a lot of witnesses, right?

—-

That’s when he woke up from his ‘dream’.

It was time for him to just go for a small walk, he thought. Climbing off the bed, he put on his shoes at the doorway and he stepped out the door to almost smack someone in the face with the door. Almost.

“Sorry dude! I almost didn’t see–” He stopped talking once he saw the face of the person on the other side of the door. He looked a lot like the guy in his dreams. The one who got mobbed by his fans.

What a crazy coincidence! A wonderful chance to try to make a new friend, right? Might was well start things off with an introduction!

“Hey! The name is Mizumachi Kengo! I transferred in and I’m a sports communications major and I want to become a…ah– what was the word again?”

Come one English, don’t fail him now. Work hard, brain! You can do this! 

“A sports announcer.”

It seemed as though he spoke without really thinking, judging by the way he immediately tried to act as though he didn’t say anything. Mizumachi could be pretty slow, but he’s not daft enough to overlook that!

“Ohyoo? How did you know that? I don’t think I told anyone here about that.” That was really surprising! Was this guy a psychic? Can you humor him and give him some numbers for the lotto? If he wins something, he’ll give you a part of the share, for helping him out, of course!

The guy in front of him seemed to fluster a bit, hesitating before he spoke up to say that he’d met his future-self who was a sports announcer. With a small pause, he continued to say that they met years ago when he was in high school, as an idol.

Eh?

Wait, so… that wasn’t a dream earlier? He– was he a time traveler or something? So he helped this guy in the past, and he travelled to the future and met his future-self?

That’s funny! Mizumachi slung an arm around Hajime’s shoulders, laughing loudly. “Looks like we’re both time travelers! I travel through the past and you travel to the future! Time travelling buddies!”

Leave it to Mizumachi to find this situation not the least bit worrisome, but a fun adventure instead!

“Know if I’m dating anyone? I sure hope future me isn’t alone.” He was genuinely really curious. He was a sports announcer, sure, but what else? Did he still swim, or play football with his buddies? Was he dating anyone? Married? Did he move back to Japan or did he move to yet another country?

Hajime flushed and stammered the words: 'N-next question please!’

Eh?

“Then… what’s your name? I’m sure we’ll be great friends!”

Yeah… great friends.

 53.) Our muses are destined to time travel

 [have an alternate meeting thing. Idk if I really fulfilled the prompt, but I don’t really get how you are 'destined’ to time travel lol Since it’s a red thread prompt, I’m just like 'in the end that means they get together right???? //shrugs? IDK I’m winging it. There are no specific rules so imma make up my own rules!]

#RTRP meme #teapartyrabbit #meme answered #thanks for the ask! #mizumachi #((Muse; Shino))

[palais-soleil-blog]

Problems You May Encounter Your First Week of Studying Abroad (Part 2):

AKA everything that went wrong for me

ALRIGHT PART TWO LETS GO. This half will focus more on things that go wrong your whole first week, not just the first day. Some of these are super specific, but hey, I made the mistakes so you don’t have to!

1. It’s day 2/3/4/5 and you’re still nauseous. 

Lol trust me this sucks. I blamed it on the car ride from the airport still affecting me; it may have also been jet lag or just general stress. Take some Tums or Pepto-Bismol and see what helps. Make sure you are FED and HYDRATED, especially hydrated if you don’t feel like you can keep food down. Eat things that stick - for me that meant stuff like pasta, potatoes, bread, and rice. It also meant not eating all of my delicious balsamic vinegar chicken because I thought I might get sick. Don’t force yourself to eat anything you can’t. Give your body time to adjust and keep an eye on what DOES make you feel better. Which leads me to my next point...

2. “Did I make the right decision?” AKA what makes the nausea go away?

I can guarantee you that every single student who goes abroad asks themselves this question at some point on the trip. Some might ask on the car ride to the US airport, I asked it when I got to my apartment and for the next two days. I questioned EVERYTHING. And I think that stress and nerves were part of what made me so nauseous. I can reassure you that you did make the right decision. Things get better! You will not feel the same way tomorrow, or a week from now. Give it time. For me, I needed that nausea to go away and I noticed that it lessened when I started to decided to change my program to end a little earlier and take some more/different classes. It ended up being an expensive change, but it’s cheaper than realizing in March that I need to go home or being miserable for my entire program. Also. Call your mom. She will know just what to say to make you feel better. ALSO, talk to your program directors. One of them gave me the best advice, which was “be kind to yourself these first few days.” This meant treating myself to a Starbucks refresher to remind me of home and taking it easy on exploring and trying new things. It meant crying if I needed to and not feeling bad, and talking to my program director when I felt really off. Do what works best for you, and think about what will help before you go so you can have a contingency plan in place. 

3. Jet lag and all it’s glory and side effects

Ultimately, I did not have the same issues with jet lag as other people do/did. Maybe it’s because of how my flights worked out -- I left the US at 8am on a Sunday and got into Paris at 8am on Monday (only about a 15 hour flight, but you have to factor in the time change.) I slept for less than two hours that entire time, although my intent had been to sleep on the overnight flight. I ended up taking a 6 hour nap that first day, and I still slept through the night completely. The next night, I woke up at 4am and couldn’t go back to sleep. I haven’t had any issues since. I sleep through the night and wake up normally, it’s honestly wonderful. Do your own research on how jet lag affects sleep and make the best decisions for yourself based on your personal needs. I’m also pretty sure jet lag affected my appetite. I was nauseous and generally not hungry AT ALL for the first 5 days. Now, my appetite has kicked in and I’m able to enjoy alllllll the French food :) Just know that at some point the effects wear off and everything will feel normal. If it doesn’t, you may want to go to a pharmacie or see a doctor. 

4. really everything boils down to WHERE THE FUCK IS MY LUGGAGE

So if you read my first post, you’ll know that it took 5 days for me to receive my luggage from my airline. If the same thing happens to you, my best recommendation is to have your study abroad office do the communicating. Chances are there will be fewer communication errors and they can argue on your behalf, especially if it is being sent to your school office. Be kind to yourself applies here, too - I wish I had gotten myself at least some pajama bottoms and a plain long sleeve tee so that I didn’t feel so gross at the end of the five days wearing the same damn clothes. Also, be persistent. I sat at my study abroad office for 3 hours over the course of two days just to make sure I would have my luggage as soon as it got there. I didn’t want to risk going the whole weekend without clean clothes. Of course, if seeing the city IMMEDIATELY means more to you, go ahead and do that. But you’ll be there for at least 4 months. You probably want your clothes a bit more. 

5. SIM cards aka SHIT cards

This was a difficulty I was not expecting in Paris. I decided with my parents that I was going to get a foreign SIM card for my trip. There’s other options, like international plans or buying a whole new phone, but generally SIM cards are the easiest. Generally. It took a week and over 7 hours on the phone to get my phone “unlocked” for a foreign SIM card...but that’s a totally different story. Back to SIM cards! Your study abroad office should recommend some local options and plans; if they don’t, ask! I’m also a fan of asking people who have gone before you what they recommend. If plans and pricing of two companies are basically the same, ask around to see if one has better customer service or works elsewhere in Europe, etc. I ended up going with Orange; here’s where shit hit the fan. The second or third day, my roommate and I walked with a group  of people to TWO different stores, at least 30 minutes apart. The first said they didn’t sell SIM cards, and the second told everyone to buy a SIM card at a newsstand and then they had to scan their passports and it was very much not like what my abroad officials told me it would be like. It seemed weird, so I opted out and went to talk to the office the next day. Turns out, the stores will tell tourists that they don’t sell SIM cards - probably because it isn’t an expensive item to sell and Americans are irritating. I went (in a much smaller group!) to the Orange store on Saint Michel and everything went exactly as I was told. (Ask for Herve if he’s there, he’s great and speaks English if you need help). I did have some minor issues setting up the last of my plan, but my abroad officials were able to help me no problem! 

TLDR; if it seems weird, don’t do it, and ask your abroad office workers for help!

6. Pickpockets and scary train people are a thing in all cities. Sucks.   

I’ve been to San Francisco and New York; I thought I knew what I was doing when it came to pickpockets. It is so different when you don’t speak the language. You become a target; Americans tend to carry more money, cards, and other expensive stuff. So don’t leave yourself open to attack. Don’t speak loudly in English on the metro, guard your stuff well, make sure backpacks and purses are zipped and if something is in your pocket, take it out and put it away. You are at your most vulnerable when you are distracted. Don’t have your phone out willy-nilly, especially if you have the newest iPhone. Prep your stuff so that when you are dead tired after class and not paying attention, you still aren’t at risk. When I’m alone, I tend to try to sit in the front metro car with the operator, even if it is really full. It’s a technique I learned on other, more dangerous transit systems, although I don’t know if it works the same in Paris. As for “scary” people; those who push and ask for money or mutter under their breath: IGNORE. Stare out the window and don’t make eye contact, put in headphones if you have them, but don’t turn on your music. You want to hear if things take a turn for the worse. I will say, I have not encountered too many “crazies” in Paris as compared to San Francisco or New York, but I’m still going to go with my instincts for self-protection. 

That’s all for part 2! Did I miss something that happened to you? Got a story or advice to share? Send it to me so we may commiserate together!

#study abroad #studying abroad #paris #paris study abroad #paris apartment #first day #first week #stress #scared #france #french #program #travel #travelin #europe