#this isn't Chris-bashing

[astraystayyh]

pieces of you

single dad!chan. x fem!reader

genre : neighbors!au. fluff. angst. slow burn. mutual pining. 8.7k wc

summary : In which you and chan are each other's missing pieces. Alternatively, Chris and his daughter come knocking at your apartment asking for flour, and he's no longer embarrassed when you open the door.

a.n. : my chris best girl dad agenda is going strong!!!!!! my second fic for the winter falls collab with my writer xi hehe i hope you will all enjoy reading!! feedback is highly appreciated 🤍 the song chris will write for sowon is light by sleeping at last, highly recommend listening to it!!

winter falls masterlist.

i. 

“I can’t believe you’re making me do this.”

“Shh, daddy smile.”

Soft murmurs linger just beyond your door, elusive words that could easily be dismissed as figments of your imagination. However, any doubt in your mind dissipates with three resounding knocks, jolting you from your momentary contemplation. 

A reluctant groan escapes you as you glance down at your attire—a loosely hanging oversized hoodie, a testament to the numerous times it has been tugged down, and a pair of pajama pants whose matching top has mysteriously vanished. Clearly, you don't feel presentable enough to welcome anyone at this late hour. So, you remain motionless, futilely lowering the TV volume in hopes that whoever's behind the door will just continue with their night. But the knocks persist against your wish, so, with a resigned sigh, you rise from your seat, your blanket cascading to the ground in a soft descent.

“What–” the words dissolve in your mouth like a sweet nectar as you open the door, your eyes beholding no one in your periphery. A slight tug at your pants draws your attention downward, only to find the most adorable child your eyes have ever laid on. She's clad in Rapunzel-themed pajamas, wolf slippers bumping into your plain ones, and, to your surprise, a whisk cradled in her small hand. 

“Hey there,” your voice softens as you crouch to meet her warm gaze. You find an innocent happiness gleaming in her eyes, a radiant spark shining even beneath the corridor's muted light. Two dimples adorn her cheeks as she smiles at you. 

“Hi, my dad wants to tell you something,” she says, pointing with her whisk to the very end of the hallway. You crane your neck, trying to catch a glimpse of the elusive figure. 

“Your dad?”

“Mm. He’s a bit shy, that’s why he’s hiding,” she confides in a whisper. But, despite her earnest attempt, her words still resound loudly in the vacant space, causing giggles to spill out of your mouth. 

“And you aren’t shy?” you inquire, tilting your head. 

“Nu-uh,” she shakes her head with conviction as someone emerges behind her. She instinctively wraps an arm around their leg, nestling her cheek against their thigh. 

She isn't shy because she feels protected.

You rise from your place, eyes locking with a familiar shade of brown. Only these hold a mesmerizing quality to them making your very breath catch in your throat. Kindness pours from his gaze as it travels down your face, a sentiment that further materializes as delicate smile lines stitch around the corner of his eyes.  

He’s beautiful. 

Your eyes trail down to two pairs of dimples, mirroring the ones of his daughter perfectly. She is his living portrait, sharing his eyes, lips, and smile. Yet, his cheeks blush in a hue she does not possess, while his left hand fiddles with his earlobe, in an unspoken, timid gesture. For some odd reason, it pierces straight through your heart.

“Sorry for bothering you,” a smooth Australian accent rolls off his tongue, similar to rich butter spread on warm bread- it infuses your being with tingles pulsating from the base of your toes. You suddenly no longer miss your blanket.

“I'm your next-door neighbor. We were just making cookies and we realized we actually  don’t have flour,” he explains, a bashful smile imprinted onto his lips. 

“You didn’t check beforehand?” you ask, laughter tinting your voice. 

“I forgot,” he admits, but his tone sounds almost sad as if beating himself over it. A fleeting shadow veils his face briefly, dissipating like a passing cloud grazing the sun.

“Can we borrow some from you? I told Sowon that we could go to the store but she said it’s too cold out,” he asks, his hand resting on his daughter’s shoulder soothingly. 

“It is too cold out,” you agree with a frown, looking down at Sowon to which she smiles brightly, happy to have your support. 

“And of course, I'll bring you flour. Don’t worry about it. Do you want to come in meanwhile?”

“It's okay, we'll wait here. Don’t want to intrude.” 

“Thank you!” Sowon beams, her missing tooth in full display. 

“Yeah, thank you so much…” he trails out, tilting his head as if to silently inquire about your name.

“Yn. And you?”

“Chris.”

“Nice to meet you, Chris,” you smile, shaking his extended hand. His fingers wrap around your palm, and it feels as if you’re grasping thunder, crackling with an electricity that your eyes can’t behold, yet your soul does, suddenly illuminated from within. 

Your smile grows as you detach yourself from his hold, before bending forward to bop Sowon’s nose. “And nice to meet you too Rapunzel.” 

Your words make her hide behind her father’s leg, peeking out slightly to look at you. 

“See I'm not the only one who gets shy,” Chan chuckles, and Sowon whines in complaint, further burying her face in her dad’s grey sweatpants. 

Adorable, so much it stirs a long-forgotten melancholy within your being. 

“She gets a pass, she's still young, right Sowon?”

“Are you calling me old then?” Chan fakes outrage, bringing one hand to his chest while the other cradles Sowon’s back. 

“Old enough to forget about flour,” you wink and he laughs, looking down at your slippers. 

“Touché.” 

A few minutes go by before you come back, a recipient full of flour in your hands. The sight before you makes you pause in your tracks– Chris, leaning against the wall, Sowon propped on his hip, her arms loosely hanging around his neck, her eyes closed. 

“Did she…” you whisper and he turns to you. 

“Yeah, fell asleep,” he smiles fondly, tucking a few strands of her hair behind the curve of her ear. “She’ll be disappointed when she wakes up to no cookies. She wanted us to have a baking holiday tradition.”

“You don’t know how to make them?” 

“No, I was counting on a six-year-old to assist me,” he chuckles quietly, prompting a snort from you. 

“Well, keep the flour, in case you need it again.” 

“Thank you, Yn,” he grins, the smile taking over his entire face, grabbing the recipient from you. 

“You’re welcome Chris,” you say, as you both linger around the door still, not making any attempt to move. 

Your eyes refuse to peel away from his, as if there were a magnetic force drawing you to him, telling you that your gaze belonged to rest on him.

“Uhm,” he clears his throat, leaning away from the wall. “I'll get going.”

“Yeah, sleep well, Chris.”

“Thank you,” he smiles before turning around. 

An idea brews in your head, a germ sprouted by the clear adoration in which Sowon gazed at her dad, and the disappointment in his face as he said he would no longer be making cookies. Had you wished to dig a little deeper, you would’ve also found a long-buried feeling of a little girl who would have loved holiday traditions as well. You close the door before heading straight to your kitchen. 

One hour later 

You knock softly on Chris’ door, fidgeting from one foot to another. You almost retract back to your apartment after your fourth knock, when the door finally opens, Chris coming into your line of sight. 

“Hi,” you greet, hands behind your back. 

“Hey,” he smiles, leaning his arm on the doorway, right above your head. He tilts his head to the side, silently wondering what you want. The words dissolve in your mouth at the way his eyes fixate on you as if trying to peer behind your irises onto your mind. 

“Cookies,” you bring the plate before him, as his eyes grow wide, an incredulous smile drawn on his lips. 

“You made them?” 

“Yeah, didn't want Sowon to be disappointed,” you shrug and his eyes grow wild, racking all over your face in disbelief. 

“You didn't have to do this,” he finally says, tone softening, syllables ringing like a sweet sonnet in your ears. 

“I know. I wanted to. and I'm a baker so making cookies comes easily to me, don't worry about it,” you shrug sheepishly, biting your lower lip slightly. You felt scrutinized by him in ways you haven't felt before. 

“Thank you, Yn, I don’t even know what to say,” he says, his smile resembling a beam of light. A surge of pride courses through you at managing to bring it forth. 

“No need to say anything. I hope I didn't wake you up,” you smile sheepishly and he shakes his head. 

“No, I- I was working in my studio and Sowon is asleep. It's just us two. Always has been,” he adds, tone slightly changing, air growing heavier between you both. It's just them two. 

“Studio?” you inquire, hoping to dispel the tension latching around you both. 

“I'm a music producer,” he clarifies. “I made a studio here so I could stay the night with Sowon.” 

“I'm sure she appreciates that,” you say as you hand the plate to him. His fingertips brush against your own, and a slight electricity courses through you at the touch, the hallway suddenly brighter from the fireworks ricocheting off of you both.

“I…. I'll get going.”

“Yeah, yeah, don't want to take more of your time.”

“I'll see you around.” 

“Yeah, I'll see you,” he says, words not ringing carelessly into the air, sounding more like a promise. He'll see you, he'll make sure of it. 

ii. 

“Can you wait!” a voice echoes near the building entrance, and you prevent the elevator doors from closing as hurried steps near you. 

You recognize the voice easily by the light tingles running down your spine, the Australian accent shooting straight through your heart. Its owner materializes, Chris— leather jacket hugging his muscles snuggly, black t-shirt tucked into a pair of blue jeans, cap nestled on his head, rebellious strands of ebony hair peeking behind it.

You find the breath knocked out of you once again at his sight. He's beautiful, even more so in broad daylight, where every feature of his comes to life, beckoning, demanding your sole attention. 

“Hey, Yn,” he smiles in delight, uttering your name in a familiarity that infuses your being with warmth. Even though you've only talked once, two days ago. 

“Hey, Chris,” you greet back, pressing the fourth elevator button again. you face the mirror to find Chris already looking at you, his eyes instantly locking with yours. 

“The cookies were good,” he smiles softly and you grin. “I'm glad you think so.” 

“Where is your bakery? I need to taste more of your baking.” 

The butterflies in your stomach tone down at his words, your attraction momentarily forgotten as gratitude coats your heart instead.

“I can text you the address?” you propose. 

“Yeah, here,” he takes out his phone, a picture of him and Sowon set as his lock screen— their cheeks are pressed tightly to one another, messily done eyeliner on both their eyes. you giggle to yourself as you grab the device.

“Cute picture,” you muse and he brings an arm to his neck, scratching the side of it timidly. 

“She insists on trying her makeup on me.” 

“She makes you look better,” you giggle and he rolls his eyes, tongue poking against his cheek. 

“She wants to become a stylist,” he explains, as the elevator doors open. He lets you out first, arm stretched forward.

“I find her passion really cute so I buy her anything she asks for,” he shrugs and you chuckle, pointing to the bag of pink ribbons he is carrying. 

“Let me guess, she wants to use these on you?”

“Yeah. She also said that I quote ‘need to learn new hairstyles because her friends always come to class with intricate braids, and she can't go to class with a simple one.’” He repeats, tone growing slightly high-pitched as he mimics his daughter's words. Yet, the fond smile on his face is louder, screaming of his love for her. 

“She has you wrapped around your finger,” you muse, leaning against your door. The keys in your bag are long forgotten. 

“She can be very scary for such a little girl.” 

“What does she threaten you with?” you ask, feigning horror. 

“No goodnight kisses,” he whispers, as if scared she'd hear him beyond the wooden door. 

“Torture,” you gasp, placing your hand on his shoulder reassuringly. Yet, the smiles slip out of your face instantly. Was it normal for clothes to dissolve under your touch, layers of cotton and leather doing nothing to stop the warmth of his skin from seeping through you? Was it normal to be so affected by such an innocent touch? 

“Uhm,” you clear your throat, “I can help you. with her hair, I mean.” 

“You don't have to. I already took too much from your time with the cookies,” he seems truly apologetic, his tone sobering as if despising others doing things for him. You see yourself in him, in the way he wants to carry the world’s burden on his shoulders. It is a reflection you wish to mend. 

“I don't mind, I remember feeling jealous of the other girls in my school so I made myself learn all the braids.” 

And then you see his gratefulness, the twinkle in his eyes that you can only grasp for a millisecond before they disappear into moon crescents. Happiness looks grand on him, overtaking his entire face, brightening his features with a glow too ethereal to be of mankind, as if they were carved to translate joy. You find yourself willing to give up more of your time to see it.

“Thank you,” he breathes out and you nod, a grin taking over your face as well. 

“You’re welcome. Let me just change my clothes.” 

☃︎⋆꙳•❅

“And then, you pull the right strand all over to the middle one. Then you repeat, this way the ribbon is braided into the hair,” you explain to a very concentrated Chris, his eyebrows furrowed as he follows your movements. 

“It looks easy when you do it,” he frowns and you giggle, handing the mirror to Sowon so she'd be able to look at her hair. 

“Do you like it,” you ask, a tad apprehensive and she beams, dimples that almost swallow her chubby cheeks surging forth. 

“Pretty!” she exclaims and you giggle, bopping her nose. “You are pretty.”

“And you are pretty too. right, daddy?”

You turn back to find Chris watching you, a smile so fond on his face that it renders your insides putty, coats your cheek in the palest shade of pink.

“Very much so,” he says, tone quieter, his eyes never leaving yours. 

Sowon suddenly climbs on her dad’s lap, star and moon stickers in hand. She places them all over his face, and he sits there diligently, arms wrapped around her midriff so she won't slip away. Every carefully placed sticker is punctuated by a soft gasp from him and a small giggle from her. You could feel the love radiating from both of them, a feeling so strong it made your heart twist in your chest. 

Were there red neon exits you weren’t aware of in your being? Ones through which love trickled away all these years ago? Were the spaces between your fingers carved to hold someone’s hand, or to make everything you've ever wanted slip from your grasp?

“What do you think?” Sowon startles you and you force a smile on your face, willing the heaviness in your heart to dissipate. There were questions you'd never find the answers to, you had to make peace with that.

“I love it!” you grin and Sowon nods, satisfied. You look down at your lap as Chris fixates his eyes on you, a worried crease growing between his eyebrows. 

“Fun is over, you need to do your homework, Miss Bang,” he scolds and you snort, as Sowon rolls her eyes slightly. 

“Did you just roll your eyes at me?” he fakes offense and you giggle as Sowon huffs slightly. “Dad, I told you I have no homework. I already did it with uncle Felix.” 

“Oh, right,” he deflates slightly before brightening up once again, “then, you should put away all these hairbrushes and ribbons, okay?”

“Will you watch a movie later with me?”

“Of course, baby.”

“Okay then,” she grins, quickly standing up to start putting away her things. you smile, getting up your turn to leave. Chris understands and stands with you on cue. 

“You can stay and watch the movie with us.”

“It's okay, I have some things to work on,” you turn around, but then you feel his fingers wrapping around your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. 

“Are you okay?” he asks, hand still burning straight through your skin, igniting a million nerve ends with a simple touch. You avoid his eyes, looking down at the ground. It seems to be response enough for him. 

“We’re conditioned to say yes even when we aren’t, right?” he speaks softly, his words travel through your veins in a rapid course against the current of your blood— which one will reach your heart first and flood it? 

Your facade cracks. His voice wins. 

“So, you don't have to reply now,” his thumb swipes once across your pulse. “But I'll be here if you ever wish to tell the truth.” 

iii.

You’ve grown exceptionally fond of Chris in the span of mere months, more than you would like to admit to yourself. It was an easy task, as natural as the current of a waterfall. Yet, you did not plan for it, for a new emotion to settle on top of your lungs, to make you more aware of your heart and how it beats, slightly faster, around Chris. But it happened serendipitously, against all odds, when he knocked on your door at 10 p.m. asking for salt.

“Should I start buying groceries for you?” you joked, and it took Chris a millisecond longer to respond, his gaze wandering across your face, as if discovering the world’s eighth wonder, hidden in plain sight all these years. 

“For my defense, I have a daughter that likes experimenting with cooking,” he smiled, and you raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Just with salt?”

“She added four teaspoons of it in an omelet. Then forced me to eat it because I always tell her food shouldn't go to waste,” he shudders at the memory and you chuckle loudly. 

Chris knocks on the doors of your heart, once.

It happened when you spotted a cockroach the size of your palm on your bedroom wall. You would’ve killed it, you were going to, except it started flying towards you and you let out a loud shriek you didn’t know your vocal chords were capable of conjuring. So, you called Chris. 

“Can you please come over,” you murmured, crouching near the entrance door, a pair of slippers in your hand.

“Why are you whispering? are you okay?” he sounded worried, and you heard the turning of a lock as he opened the door to his apartment. He didn’t ask questions, instantly coming to your aid. A sudden urge to weep filled your being at his gesture. 

“There is a cockroach. a flying one,” you precised, horror dripping from your tongue and his laugh flooded your ear, tiny squeaks that made your hold on the slipper grow limp. 

“I'm from Australia,” he knocked on your door, and you stood up promptly. “I've seen worse,” he said once you finally opened it, his eyes softening incredibly when they met yours. 

He did kill the cockroach, by spraying your insect repellent enough times to asphyxiate you too. “I don't think I can sleep in there tonight,” you sighed, gulping down ice cold water, “why does it feel like we went through war?” 

“We? You were behind my back all the time.”

 “I was cheering you on, from afar. Spiritually.”

 “I can’t believe a cockroach scares you this much.”

 “You literally screamed when it flied towards you too.”

 “I didn't scream! I made a very manly, non-terrified sound.”

 “Mm, sure,” you giggled, voice softening at the blushing of the tip of his ears. Chris didn't have to force the door down to your heart, you willingly opened it for him. 

And after that, it was a race to find the silliest excuses to see one another. Chris suddenly taking up an inkling for baking, you manifesting a newfound interest in music, Sowon needing her makeup done for a dance, Chris visiting you in your bakery, Sowon craving your cookies and you teaching her the recipe, Chris knocking on your door and you knocking on his. The same giddy smiles on your faces as you usher each other in. And it always, always ending with a movie night. 

“Let's watch Tangled,” Sowon exclaims, clapping her hands excitedly. 

“Baby, we watched this movie for the past…” he looks at you for support. “Three,” you whisper, a bashful smile on your face. “Yeah, for the past three movie nights,” he whines slightly.

“But I love it,” she says, her pout morphing into a huge grin. “Again! Again! Again!”

“Fine,” he concedes, mouthing “save me,” from afar to you. You giggle softly while Sowon cozies up to your side, your arm naturally draping across her body while her legs stretch atop Chris’ lap, naturally, as if having you both by her side was the way things have always been. The only reality she’s ever known.

It is a fleeting fifty minutes as the three of you watch the movie, Sowon reciting excitedly the lines that she seems to remember. But then the quiet is replaced by her soft snores, her body growing light against you.

“She fell asleep,” you whisper, tapping Chris’ shoulder to catch his attention. He tilts his head to the side, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips as his eyes land on his daughter. 

“I'm sorry you have to watch the same movie every time,” he says apologetically and you shake your head. 

“I don't mind. Tangled is a good movie.” 

“Are you here just because of the movie?” he smiles, dimples peeking through. The juxtaposition between the weight of his words and the soft expression on his face makes a buzzing warmth spread through you. He’s cold and hot, in and out, yours but not. 

“What do you want me to be here for?” you throw back, squeezing his shoulder slightly. 

“The company.”

“I do find Sowon entertaining.”

“Just her?” he pouts and you giggle, tipping your head back. 

“And you too, I suppose, by extension.”

“By extension, mm,” he hums, as he gathers Sowon in his arms, freeing her from your hold. “Then I guess I shouldn't come visit you in your bakery anymore. Since you only enjoy my presence by extension.”

“So sassy,” you shout-whisper as you both walk to Sowon's bedroom, “I like your company too, idiot.” 

“Yeah?” he turns back to look at you, tone a tad bit too hopeful. He doesn’t care that he sounds eager for your approval, not when he feels as if he can only truly breathe when you're near. 

“Yeah, Chris, I really do,” you speak earnestly, and Chris bites his lower lip slightly, suddenly overwhelmed by the gentleness of your tone. Your eyes follow his action instantly. 

He lowers Sowon gently onto the bed and she stirs awake, blinking repeatedly at the both of you. “Yn,” she calls out quietly once her eyes land on yours and you kneel before her bed. Chris watches from the door entrance as Sowon cups her hand near your ear, before whispering something to you. He notices your body stiffening, your gaze fleeting to him before you relax, pressing a kiss to her cheek. 

He wishes he could freeze time, stitch this moment into his eyelids until it is the only thing he sees when he goes to sleep. Loneliness is too big of an enemy for one person to fight off, but it seems more harmless when you are near. 

Chris sees you right here, every night, not forcing your place into his family, but falling seamlessly into place. Perhaps you were the missing piece that’ll soothe the burn in his heart. Perhaps he’d let you in, even as fear paralyzes his being at the mere thought of asking you to stay. 

One week later. 

You've grown used to the knocks on your door at ungodly hours of the night, Chris seeking your company each time you both fail to fall asleep. Except this time, there is a chilling premonition in your heart as you walk to your home’s entrance, anxiety coiling like a steel ball in your throat. 

“What’s wrong?” you ask upon opening the door, locking eyes with Chris's bloodshot gaze.

“Sowon,” he heaves, tone laden with fear, so different from how he usually pronounces her name. The syllables pierce through your heart like an arrowhead dipped in alarm. 

“Sowon?” you question, peering behind him to his slightly ajar apartment door.

“Yes, she has a high fever, and it won’t come down. I tried everything, and I-I don’t know what to do anymore. She’s shaking, but I can’t—”He trembles, his quivers akin to delicate chinaware on the precipice of an earthquake, poised to shatter at your feet. You'd plunge to the ground first, anything to soften his impending collapse.  

“It’s okay,” you soothe, your voice soft as you grasp his wrist. “Let’s go see her, okay?”

“It's her first time being this sick,” he whispers, clearly distraught, one hand running through his freshly dyed blonde hair. 

“It's okay. Don’t panic, it happens. Did you give her medicine?”

“Yes, a few minutes ago,” he replies as you guide him towards her room.

“Good, it'll start working soon,” you reassure, opening the door and crouching before Sowon.

“Hey, Rapunzel,” you coo softly, and Sowon attempts to muster a smile. Her cheeks flush, eyes dim like withered petals.

“How are you feeling?” you ask, pressing your hand to her feverish forehead. You cast a wary glance at Chan, who's anxiously biting his thumb.

“Cold,” she whispers, and you nod, peeling off her blanket. “I know you are, but you have a high fever. We need to let it cool down, okay?”

“I-I’m shaking,” Sowon sighs, lower lip protruding and trembling, both from the iciness clawing at her frail being, and the tears welling in her waterline, like a cup on the brink of overflowing. 

“Shh, don't cry. It will pass, it's okay,” you murmur soothingly, cradling her face on your lap, gently moving damp strands of her hair behind her ear.

“Chris, can you bring me a towel and a bowl with cold water?” you ask softly, and the man startles, painfully peeling his eyes away from his daughter, as if doing so would consign her to a dark fate.

“Sure. Sure,” he repeats, scurrying out of the room.

Sowon buries her cheek in your thigh, small hands clinging tightly to yours. You tie her hair up into a loose bun as Chan hurriedly comes back, a bassinet in his hand.

“Thank you,” you smile, as he kneels beside the bed, his hand resting on Sowon’s knee gently.

“Hey sweetheart,” he coos softly, and Sowon blinks at him, light spilling over her face. 

“Hey daddy,” she replies as you dip the towel into the water, before squeezing the fabric to remove any liquid excess. 

“You're being so strong. I love you so much my pretty girl,” he says, bringing her small hand to rest upon his cheek, bestowing a gentle kiss on her palm. 

The moment feels so intimate, so tender, that you almost feel like an intruder. You imagine this is what thorns on roses must feel like, so out of place amid delicate petals and stems. 

“I love you too,” she grins, and you remain silent, diligently wiping her face and neck with the dampened towel. You soon lose track of the number of times you've repeated this motion, but Sowon’s eyes are now closed and her body is no longer trembling. 

You rest your palm upon her forehead, a sigh of relief escaping your body as you realize that her fever has gone down noticeably- the medicine finally taking effect.

“It's better now,” you smile reassuringly and Chris’s eyes widen, irises shaking as he looks back to his daughter. 

“Will she be okay?” 

“She will be. She just needs to sleep a bit.” 

“Okay, thank you.” 

“Can we prepare her something to eat meanwhile?” 

“Mm,” he absentmindedly nods, his fingers trailing down Sowon’s features delicately, resting upon her round cheeks. 

"She looks just like you," you softly smile.

"I know," he admits, not with pride but in surrender, as if his reflection was nothing but a cursed fate. His voice tastes like ocean water, salty, acid, suffocating.

“Chris…” you trail off and he shakes his head, abruptly standing up. 

“Let's make her chicken noodle soup. She loves it,” he says and you nod. A ticking bomb resides in his veins, devoid of a countdown, leaving you unsure of when he'll finally explode. 

You get your answer soon after—it takes two minutes and thirty-three seconds for the first tear to roll down Chris’s cheek. You spot it as you retrieve carrots from the fridge, averting your gaze as Chan angrily wipes it away.

A few seconds later, five tears follow the same agonizing trail, and now the knife is shaking in Chris’s hands. He squeezes his eyes shut as if frustrated by his pain, by the emotions escaping through the cracks in his heart.

You stay silent, bringing the water to a simmer.

The clank of metal against the counter snaps your attention, and you see Chris with his head lowered down, his hands tightly clutching the counter.

Your tongue moves before you can order it to speak. 

"Chris," you call out, your hand finding its place on his back. An ugly sob escapes his lips, a raw cry unearthed from the depths of the soil where he buried his feelings, never allowing himself the grace of grieving, then moving on. 

“I'm a horrible father,” he utters so brokenly as if this idea were cemented into his head, woven into every thought of himself—an adjective that lingers like a phantom each time Sowon calls him dad.

“You're not, what are you saying?” you gently turn him around so he'd face you. But his eyes remain downcast, as if ashamed to meet your gaze. 

“I didn't know what to do. I panicked. I-I wasn't enough to help her.”

“It's okay, you can't know everything, you are trying your best-”

“No, no, no, it's not just about this!” he snaps,  despair clinging to his eyes as he finally looks at you. “It’s hard. It’s so hard to be here alone, and I- I try but it's not enough, I can't do everything and I'm not a good enough parent for her, there will a-always be something missing.” 

“You're wrong,” you say but he shakes his head in disagreement. “Chris, you're wrong,” you cradle his face, taking you both by surprise. Your thumb swipes gently underneath the skin of his eyes, wiping his cascading tears. 

“You love Sowon. And she can feel it, she can see it, she can hear it. Everyone can. A parent can't be perfect, but they should love. And you love her.” 

“What if I can't even love her enough for a father? How will I ever fill the role of two parents?” he's leaning onto your palm, hanging onto your every word. You'd sit for hours and untangle every thread of his mind if you have to, until you single out the infested one and burn it away. 

“She loves you Chris. She looks at you as if you hang every star in the sky. As if you're responsible for every good thing that happens in our world. She loves you and you love her.”

You gaze up at the ceiling, tears welling in your eyes. Chan notices the subtle tremble in your hand against his cheek.

“If I had someone who loved me as much as you love Sowon when I was a child, I would've turned out so differently,” you smile bitterly, swallowing down the lump in your throat. 

“You won't be a perfect dad. You can't be. But she won't grow up with a throbbing heart, pulsating because of a void that cannot be filled. Her veins won't be poisoned by hate and abandonment. Because she knows what it's like to be loved,” you pause, as your voice breaks, traitorous tears rolling down your cheeks. “To be cared for.” 

Your eyes hold his in a silent conversation, secretly telling him what your tongue cannot speak of— Sowon, an untarnished blossom, won't unfurl into a solitary flower the way you did.

“I'm sorry,” he whispers after a while, eyes softening in understanding. His knuckles brush gently against your cheek. 

“Why are you apologizing?” 

“So you'd find a reason within you to forgive,” he says, as he leans forward to press a tender kiss on your forehead. And somehow it feels more intimate than any way you've been touched before. 

Five days later.

chris [11:32 p.m.]: you up?

yn [11:32 p.m.]: i just got bad flashbacks to my college years

chris [11:33 p.m.]: ajaksjsbsbbs

chris [11:33 p.m.]: i didn’t mean it like that ㅠㅠ 

chris [11:33 p.m.]: wanna come over? i'm in the studio but im not feeling inspired 

yn [11:34 p.m.]: and how will i help? 

chris [11:34 p.m.]: i find your presence inspiring 

You don’t reply, instead putting on your slippers and walking over to his apartment. He opens the door before you even have the chance to knock. 

“What are you working on?” you ask once you’re settled atop his chair, spinning around slightly. He looks down at the pillow on his lap, lightly plucking its pink fur. “A song for Sowon,” he admits softly and your eyes grow a little wide. 

“That is so sweet,” you pout, inching closer to him. “How is it going?”

“I've finished the melody and now I'm working on the lyrics. There is just.. so much i want to tell her, i'm unsure if ill be able to express it well.” 

“Can I read what you wrote?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, sure,” he searches through his papers. “Here.”

May these words be the first to find your ears

The world is brighter than the sun now that you're here

I'll give you everything I have

I'll teach you everything I know

I promise I'll do better

I will soften every edge

I'll hold the world to its best

And I'll do better

Tears spring to your eyes unexpectedly, you try to stop their flow but they fall upon the paper, splattering like a broken mosaic, mimicking the brokenness of your own heart. 

“I'm sorry,” you spin around, your back to him as you attempt to dry your tears, and yet they show no desire to stop. Chris is in your heart and he’s kicking every other emotion out, forcing you to make amends with your sadness, the one you buried years, years ago. 

Chris gently grabs the back of the chair, pulling you back to him before spinning your chair once again until you are facing him. You bury your face in your hands and his rests reassuringly on your knee, squeezing it slightly. “Is it so bad it made you sob?” 

“Shut up, you know this isn’t the case.” 

His hand delicately traces up your arm, gently lifting your fingers from your face. He kneels before you, his thumb tenderly wiping away the traces of tears on your cheeks.

“Talk to me?” 

“It's so beautiful, so warm, so loving. Everything a parent should think of their child,” a traitorous hiccup escapes your lips. “Everything my parents never felt for me.” 

Chris’ mouth morphs into a pout, eyebrows scrunching tightly. You shake your head, smoothing down the worried crease between his eyes. 

“I don't feel sad over things I can't control and I love myself enough now to compensate for what I didn't have, but sometimes-'' your voice breaks, Chan’s hold on your hands tightens. “It stings to remember what could’ve been.” 

Stings was an understatement, it is rather a pulsating void, throbbing in ache every day, calling out for its missing piece. How can I fill you with what was lost when it chose to walk away? 

“Come here,” he whispers, coaxing you to your feet, his arms enveloping your body as he guides your head to the crook of his neck. His body runs warm, the material of his sweatshirt soft, and he smells nice too, the contours of his muscles tailor-made to complement the ridges of your own. 

“You grew up well, Yn. You did well.”

You clutch his shirt, tightening your grip as you fist the fabric in your palm. He's patting your back, and time slows down to match the rhythm of his touch. 

“Love can be hard, I know. Especially when the people who left are the ones supposed to be staying.” 

He understands, more than anyone you know. He missed out on a different kind of love too, two facets of the same coin. 

“You’re doing well too, Chris. You shouldn’t doubt yourself as much,” your arms trail up to encircle his neck, as his nose tickles your hair. You're the one hugging him now. “Sowon is really smart, she told me that she loves you a lot. She can feel it. She sees everything you do for her.”

“Is that what she told you that movie night?”

“Partly,” you whisper, and Chris leans away slightly, his warm palms still pressed to your waist, holding you close. 

“What else did she tell you?” he asks, curiosity barely hidden in his tone.

You pause for a while, eyes going over the entire room before finally locking on him.

“She thanked me, said that I make you smile more.” You suck in a deep breath, gathering your courage. “Do I?” 

“There are smile lines that don’t show on my face until you're near.” 

“Oh.” That is the only coherent response you can formulate, and Chris giggles, a tiny squeak escaping his lips in a huff. “Cute,” he murmurs, planting a tender kiss on your temple. His lips linger, holding onto the moment a beat longer than necessary, causing your eyes to close in delight. Both of you find yourselves blushing as he leans away, a shared warmth coloring the space between you.

“Sorry, didn't mean to make the mood somber,” you say sheepishly as you sit back down, eyeing Chris’s laptop. “I wanna hear this,” you quickly point to a random track on his screen before he can reply, hoping to make the sadness flee away.

“This one? It’s not really good, let's listen to something else,” his rambling and eagerness to change the track pique your curiosity and you quickly click on the song before he can stop you.

connected.mp3 starts playing. 

Sultry beats inundate your ears, weaving through your veins and whisking you away to the pulsating rhythm of a dance club. You knew Chris produced good music, yet you never fathomed that his voice could be so luxuriously rich, cascading over you like molten wax. You feel a blush rise to your cheeks at the suggestive lyrics, the innuendos peeking behind every word. And then, a sudden jealousy claws at your heart, at the thought of Chris hunched in his studio, fantasizing about connecting with someone who isn’t you. 

You wished to be the only one Chris liked. 

“It’s a- a demo for one of my clients,” he explains through a stutter once the song is done, and you nod meekly, willing your body’s temperature to go down, for the possessivity crinkling in you to fizzle out. 

So, you put on your best taunting smirk.

“I know you want me don’t crumble.. No need to be desperate we’re just getting started,” you sing-song back. “You were feeling so cocky when you wrote this, right?” you grin, inching your chair closer to his. “Feeling yourself, Mr. Bang?”

He chuckles with a hint of annoyance, running his tongue along the expanse of his lower lip. Leaning back into his chair, he casually spreads his legs a bit wider, a gesture that suddenly leaves you feeling dizzy, on him.

“It’s cute how affected you seem by it,” he throws nonchalantly, crossing his arms before his chest.

“I'm not,” you smile, although your erratic heartbeat spoke of a different tale, you just didn't need to voice it to him. “I think you were the one getting all hot and bothered in your studio,” you stand between his legs, hovering over him as he leans back fully in his chair. 

“I was thinking of a pretty girl.”

“Yeah?”

“Mm,” he suddenly grabs your waist, you feel like your entire body is ablaze. “The prettiest.”

"Who is she?" you exhale, teetering on the edge of crashing your lips onto his, like an incoherent love poem, hastily scrambled on a notebook in a fit of anger.

“y–” The door suddenly opens, Sowon’s small frame standing by the door, she’s rubbing her eyes tiredly, her chick plushie dangling from her hand (a gift from her uncle Felix as she explained to you). You quickly scramble away from Chris as he clears his throat loudly.

“Daddy, I can't sleep,” she says faintly, a tiny pout drawn on her lips, and you can see Chris physically melt at her words, at the way she paddles to his chair, and tries her best to climb up his legs. She fails to do so, so he quickly scopes her up his arms until she’s buried in his hold. Her small hands wound up around his neck, and he tenderly pats down her hair, his gaze never wavering from her frame.

“Want me to sing to you, sweetheart?”

“Yes,” she whispers, before making grabby hands at you, your heart softens like clay dough as you scoot closer, enclosing her fingers in your hold. 

“Sleep well, Sowonnie,” you whisper. 

“Can’t you stay with us?” she asks and you feel your blood freeze in your veins, your heart skipping three beats at once.

To stay. What a frightening concept. Even more scary when you realize that you aren’t opposed to it. 

You yearn to stay, for the first time in years, you wish you could. 

You swallow the growing lump in your throat, before smiling reassuringly. “I'll stay till you fall asleep.” 

Conditions, it is the way it has always been for you. staying till you’re no longer useful, staying till you're no longer wanted. Staying, but always with a time limit, always with an expiration date. 

iv. 

You’re avoiding him. 

Chris knows you are, since you no longer come over to his house, claiming that you’re tired, or that you have an important order to bake for the next day. He would have believed you had he not seen you only once in the past three weeks. 

Those were excuses, and each one of them weighed heavily on Chris’ heart, on his home too, his studio particularly, the one that got used to the sound of your laugh. 

He misses you. He never thought he’d miss someone again, craving you presence as if every breath leaving his body depended on you. He wasn’t a stranger to intimacy, fleeting hookups every now and then. Strangers invited him to their bed, knowing what they were signing up for– one night of pleasure, never to be seen again, their faces blurring into an indistinct mass in his mind, like an impressionist painting where no features stand out. Yet, with you, every detail is etched in his memory. 

He could pick you out of a crowded room, recognize the delicate curve of your neck, the fullness of your lips, and the way your nose scrunches when you smile.

He could draw the moles scattered on your body from memory alone, recognize your scent from miles away– your cotton shampoo and the specific laundry detergent you love to use and a hint of vanilla that never truly leaves you. 

He’d remember the curve of your lashes and the cascading of your hair, the airy giggles you leave across like a trail for him to follow everywhere, and your eyes– the way they gazed at him, softening slightly around the edges, shining brightly as if crafted from stardust, the way they softened even more when you looked at Sowon, voice growing slightly high pitched as you listened to his daughter’s rambles.

How did you manage to make his home yours without ever living in it?

“Dad?” Sowon calls out and he snaps his head up, locking eyes with his little girl. She’s sitting on a high stool, munching on her pizza, a pensive look on her face.

“Yes, sweetheart?” he asks, walking over to her side.

“Where is Ynnie?” she asks in a small voice and he freezes, mulling over his response. He settles for the truth.

“I don't know, baby.”

“Does she not want to play with me anymore?” Sowon whispers, and he doesn’t remember his daughter ever being this tentative about voicing a question. 

“No!” he's quick to reassure, cradling Sowon’s face between his much larger hands. “Of course not baby she loves you a lot.”

“Okay…” she nods, a small pout drawn on her lips still. Chris senses his heart physically crack in his chest.

“Do you wanna work in the studio with me?” he says in a joyful tone, and she instantly cheers up, the twinkle in her eyes found again. “Yes!” 

“Finish your food first, okay Wonnie?” 

“Okay!” 

In Chris's life, regrets have been scarce, and certainly not in the form of Sowon, his beacon of hope, as he named her. Having her was beholding a sun wherever he went. However, a fear lingers, a whisper in his heart, suggesting that letting you go might be his one true regret.

So when his daughter falls asleep, he knocks on your door once again. He's suddenly transported into that cold night, months ago, where he asked you for flour. Had he known you were behind it he would’ve knocked much sooner. 

“Hi,” you greet softly once you open the door. He takes a step forward, his wolf slippers matching with Sowon’s bump into your plain ones. You avert your gaze, finding anything but him to fixate on.

“You're avoiding me,” he says matter-of-factly, voice soft, resigning to you.

“I'm not,” you contradict, even as your eyes remain on the ground. He finds himself missing the color of your irises.

“Look at me, hm?” he implores, and you stay rooted in place. A soft sigh escapes him as he cradles your right cheek with his warm hand, his thumb gently sweeping across your cheekbone. “Yn, please, I want to look at you.”

Maybe it is the pleading tone of his voice or the way his thumb tenderly grazes your skin, but something about Chris makes your resolve unravel, threads of fear unknotting before your eyes. So, you finally look at him. An exhale of relief escapes him. 

And then you speak.

“You asked me if I was okay, and I didn't reply, back then,” you say, leaning your head further against his palm as tears well up in your waterline. “Do you still want to know my answer?”

“Of course, always.”

“I'm happy. With you, with sowon. I feel this warmth that I have never known before when I'm with you. It was almost easy to forget I've known you during winter,” you chuckle dryly, “but it is all an illusion, I lie to myself thinking I could stay, I… I can't, I-“

“What if I ask you to stay?” he brings your hand to his heart, where it beats erratically, pulse seeping through your skin.

He’s as scared as you are.

“Chris…”

“What if I told you, Yn, please stay with me,” he breathes out, guiding your hand to gently cup his cheek. “Would you? Would you stay?”

“I'm terrified,” you whisper, as he tilts his head, bestowing a tender kiss on your palm. 

“I know, so am I. But, you make me believe that even my bruised parts are worthy of love.”

He wins, before years of skeletons and piled up doubts, he wins. 

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“I'm staying.”

“You are?”

“I am,” you giggle lightly and he staggers back, the sun pouring into his smile. 

“Um, wow, okay. Thank you for staying,” his voice sounds airy, happiness floating in his tone, and you find it contagious, imprinting into your own.

“Thank you for asking me to stay.”

“You made it less daunting,” he pats your head, smoothing your hair down. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too.”

He giggles in response and you can't help but mirror the sound. “Why are you so nervous?”

“Whaaat? I'm not,” his tone grows high-pitched and you roll your eyes amusedly. 

“What happened to connected Chris?” 

“He is flustered by the girl he wrote about.”

Your cheeks tint red as he places a hand above your head, caging you in place. 

“I think the girl should get paid for being the muse.”

“Oh yeah?” he smirks, “I'll think about it.” His grin softens, as a content expression washes over his face. You know you must look the same. “Let's talk more tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay,” you grin, before placing a chaste kiss on his cheek. “Good night, Chris.”

“Good night, yn.”

You quietly watch as he walks to his apartment door, his hand settling on the door knob. He pauses, for a few seconds where the air around you stills, before swiveling around and walking over to you again. 

you win. 

“I forgot something,” he breathes out, before crashing his lips onto yours, furiously, as if needing to imprint his essence onto you, tainting your soul the way you have tainted him, permanently altering the composition of his being. His lips move on yours as if they've done this before, a dance they have rehearsed countless times, perhaps in all the dreams Chris visited you in. Yet, nothing compares to how it feels to have him touch you, lick your lower lip and drag his hand up your hips, press you against your apartment door, and nibble at your neck. 

Nothing could have prepared you for the passion he shows you, for how delicious it feels to be pressed against him, for the storm that your lips conjure, swirling in your heart in vibrant shades of red. Then, for the softness of his lips as they slow down their course, plump and rosy as they meet your own, tenderly, more gently, one kiss after the other. “My hope,” he whispers, as his lips find yours again, “my missing piece.”

He’s hot and cold, in yet seeking no out, finally yours.

bonus (one year later). 

“So I brought the eggs, milk, sugar,” Chris enumerates as he takes out the groceries, and you turn to look at Sowon to find her already gazing at you, a mischievous look on her face. 

“How much do you wanna bet he forgot flour?” you whisper and she giggles, burying her face in her hands to stifle her laugh.

“And… Wait, where is the flour?” he trails off and you burst out laughing, as you and Sowon high-five each other excitedly. 

“Daddy, you are really bad at groceries.”

“Am I?” he smiles sheepishly, fiddling with his earlobe in a manner that still makes your heart melt, renders your insides butterflies speaking of Chris’ name.

“Yes, it’s good Mom bought it,” she says naturally, looking down at her iPad. You and Chris freeze in your tracks, eyes instantly locking with one another, yours and his, glossy with emotion, a loving tide enveloping you both. 

It's her first time calling you mom. 

You swallow down the lump in your throat, crafted not by thorns but by petals, not by ache but with love, before placing your chin on the small of her shoulder, murmuring softly. "Mm, will you help me bake, baby?"

“Yes! I wanna be a baker when I grow up, just like you.”

“What happened to being a stylist?”

“I can't be both?” she frowns innocently. 

“You can be anything you want, princess.” you bop her nose and she giggles, pressing a sweet kiss to your cheek. 

In the grip of winter, Chris discovers a warmth that defies the season, casting off years of cold from the recesses of his bones. A soft smile graces his lips as he gazes at you, his hopes, his girls, the three of you clad in wolf slippers.

He’ll propose to you tomorrow.

#skz x reader #skz x you #stray kids x reader #stray kids x you #stray kids angst #skz fluff #stray kids fluff #skz imagines #stray kids imagine #stray kids reactions #skz angst #skz fanfic #chan fluff #chan x reader #bang chan x reader #bang chan fluff #skz scenarios #stray kids scenarios #skz au

[chronicowboy]

Buck is stood staring at his couch with a wrinkled nose when a frantic knocking rips him from his thoughts. Frowning, he skids over to the door on socked feet and yanks it open to reveal a harried Eddie and sheepish Christopher.

"Tell me you aren't busy," Eddie pleads, already pushing into the loft to set down two dangerously full grocery bags on the kitchen island.

The loft suddenly seems a lot brighter, feels a lot warmer.

"I'm not busy," Buck replies as he shoots a questioning look at Christopher who only bites his lip and looks away.

"Oh, thank God." Eddie grabs him by the shoulders with a grateful smile before taking a deep breath. "I am. Busy. Like incredibly busy."

"Okay..." Buck narrows his eyes at him. "So, I'm hanging out with my favourite Diaz then?"

"Hold the thought on that favourite bit," Eddie huffs, dropping his hands. Buck's shoulders turn cold at the loss, he shrugs the absence off. Eddie turns to Christopher with his arms folded over his chest and an arched eyebrow. "Want to tell Buck what you decided to tell me at four pm this afternoon?"

"Fine," Chris sighs, looking up at Buck guiltily. "I need to bake cookies for my whole class."

"Sure, we can do that." Buck frowns, sharing a look with a still frantic Eddie. "When do you need them for?"

Christopher averts his eyes. Realisation dawns on Buck, and he shares a knowingly unimpressed look with Eddie.

"Tomorrow," he mumbles.

"Chris," Buck groans.

"I know, okay?" Chris groans right back. "I forgot. I'm sorry. Will you help me? Please?" He breaks out his patented puppy eyes, and Buck has to try hard not to laugh at the notion he wasn't going to help Chris all along.

Buck steals a look at an apologetic Eddie, shakes his head in a way he hopes conveys I've got your back.

"Of course I will, Chris, you know that." His eyes snap to Christopher when Eddie's face melts into that dangerously fond expression. He's been seeing a lot more of it ever since he woke up from his coma, and it makes him feel a little like a lightning bolt trapped in a human body. He doesn't know what to make of it.

"You are a lifesaver," Eddie tells him seriously, pulling him into a quick hug. "I've gotta get over to Pepa's, but I'll be back around dinner time, okay?"

"Oh, I see," Buck tuts. "You just want to reap the benefits of all our hard work."

"Obviously." Eddie pulls one of his patented frog faces. "I wasn't trying to hide that."

"Lazy good-for-nothing," Buck says, except it comes out sounding much more like you're everything.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Who here was asleep for a wholeass week?" Eddie retorts.

"Ass," Chris snickers.

"Don't," Buck and Eddie scold in unison, sharing a bashful smile. Chris just rolls his eyes.

Buck tries not to preen at how natural all of this is, thinks of Bobby's words in the engine just before lightning struck.

Life's too short to take those relationships for granted.

Buck has seen his world without the Diazes in it, he'll never take them for granted again.

"I don't think a coma is technically considered sleep," Buck argues, just happy that Eddie isn't flinching away from the reminder of the accident like he used to.

"Well, you weren't snoring," Eddie concedes.

"I don't snore!"

"Buck, the only reason I felt okay leaving you sleeping on the couch to make Christopher's lunch was because I could hear you breathing all the way from the kitchen." Buck tries not to think about a worried Eddie hovering over him, fingers itching to reach out and find a pulse, lingering in the doorway to the kitchen because he didn't want to leave Buck alone. "You snore."

"You snore," Chris agrees.

"Betrayal!" Buck gasps. "We're making oatmeal raisin cookies."

"Nooooooo!" Chris cries. "Buck, please!"

"Do I snore?" Buck demands.

"Nope." Chris grins.

"Chocolate chip it is."

"Double chocolate chip?" he tries, eyes wide and sparkling. Buck loves him desperately.

"Nice try, kid." Eddie drops a hand onto Christopher's head. "You get double chocolate chip when you tell us more than one day in advance."

Something warm and content settles in Buck's gut at the ease of Eddie's us.

"Buck?" Chris pouts up at him.

"Nah, not gonna work on me." Buck shakes his head, folds his arms over his chest. Eddie sends him a smile, the small and private one that tucks itself into Eddie's rosy cheeks, the one that Buck's pretty sure he'd return from the dead just to see again.

"Okay, well, you two have got it under control." Eddie ducks down to drop a muah! on Christopher's head, presses a quick one to Buck's cheek. "I'm off! Love you both, see you for dinner!"

Eddie sweeps out of the door in a whirlwind of frantic energy. Buck just watches him go, mouth half-open in a soft 'o' as the skin of his cheek tingles where Eddie's lips had been. He stares at the closed door with wide eyes, stares for so long his mouth goes dry.

Maybe he does have the answers, maybe he's had a couch all along.

A sharp tug on his shirt pulls him from his trance, and he looks down at Christopher.

"Cookies?" he says, entirely too knowing for an eleven-almost-twelve-year-old.

"Cookies," Buck nods.

#sami rambles #eddie realises what he's done when he parks at pepa's and then immediately says yes when she asks to set him up #episode coda #911 show #911 spoilers #911 fox #911 fic #911 fanfic #buddie fanfic #buddie fic #buck x eddie #buck x eddie fanfic #buck x eddie fic #evan buckley #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #buck and christopher #buckley diaz family #buckley diaz family fic

[songbvrd]

ok but i've been thinking more about eddie cheating arc and it actually makes so much sense (aside from just being fucking hilarious that he's cheating on his ex-nun gf he already avoids for two men with the doppelganger of his dead wife)

but here's the thing. eddie has objectively dated women who he has no reason not to like. they're women who are objectively good for him and for his son. ana was a teacher, who christopher loved, who genuinely seemed good with him, and yet, at the prospect of it becoming too real, he abandoned ship (there's other stuff with her, but the show didn't acknowledge that from eddie's perspective, so i'm not referring to it either). with marisol, despite the actress being just objectively bad, there's no reason for him not to want to be with her. she has been cool w his hot and cold behaviour, she's clearly good with chris, and she clearly likes him. and yet, eddie clearly doesn't want to be with her (as evidenced by him constantly asking her to babysit so he can hang out with tommy or buck or kim lmao, literally anyone else).

like, in universe, these are two women who are beautiful, patient and care about his child.

and yet, eddie can't let go of shannon. because eddie doesn't feel the way he's supposed to feel about these women and there's an easy excuse to explain it. he never got over his son's mother. the problem, of course, being that he wasn't actually happy with her either. they were just kids themselves when shannon got pregnant, and for the majority of their relationship, they were avoiding each other. they were constantly fighting/disagreeing and their last encounter before her death was literally her leaving him again (not shannon bashing, i like her, but it's hard to deny that they were dysfunctional as hell, and not actually happy together, despite the fact that they did actually seem to love each other).

but for eddie, if you're trying to avoid reality, what better way to do it than to hide behind 'the one who got away'. a woman who can never prove his hypothesis wrong because she's gone. whilstever he can explain it away as 'it's because of shannon', he never has to confront the possibility that there's another reason why he doesn't feel what he thinks he should feel for these women.

so then he sees shannon (kim). and shannon is his scapegoat. shannon is the reason he can't make it work. so in theory, seeing her again, in his mind, it should "fix" him, right? except, it can't. because he was never actually happy with shannon, and regardless, this isn't shannon. he says he wants to nest, and i do believe that's true, but he also can't go through with something he doesn't really feel, clearly, so he sabotages it. so he's going to throw himself into it, sabotaging his relationship with marisol at the same time.

and when he tries again with kim, and it still isn't working, eddie's going to break down, because there's another reality he has to address. shannon isn't the reason it isn't working. it was an easy excuse to hide behind, but it isn't about her. eddie breaks down, pushes everyone away, struggles to deal with what tthat means for him.

but the truth is, it isn't working because it isn't what he wants. it's what he THINKS he should want. now, obviously, buddie is what i'm getting at here, but this conversation isn't even necessarily about buck. it's about eddie as a whole, and what he's hiding from.

wham bam, thank you ma'am, gay eddie realisation arc season 8.

#eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #am i delulu? i can't even tell anymore #probably #but assuming he does actually have feelings for buck he isn't addressing #buck coming out could have triggered this specific breakdown as well

[and-stir-the-stars]

Welcome to the Crying Child Weekend Bash!

What is it?

A weekend all about the fnaf 4 Crying Child! Create fanworks-- fanart, edits, fics, poetry, or anything else you can think of-- that center around the Crying Child and match one of the day's given themes (don't worry, there's a free space day too, in case you want to participate but don't want to do a theme)

When is it?

The event will run from Friday January 5th to Monday January 8th, 2024!

Can I still participate if I use a special name for the Crying Child?

Hell yeah! Evan, Chris, Norman, CC, Cassidy, Stormaggeddon the dark lord of all-- doesn't matter what you call him; all Crying Child content is welcome.

Can I submit content for the event if it's for an au?

Yep! Just make sure to provide a brief summary of your au along with your work (at the beginning if it's a fic) so anyone who isn't familiar with the au can quickly get caught up and engage with your work for the event!

What are the prompts?

Friday, Jan 5th: Nightmare / Blood / Fun

Saturday, Jan 6th: Friend / Family / Haunting

Sunday, Jan 7th: Trust / Betrayal / Trapped

Monday, Jan 8th: Free space! Submit any content you have that doesn't follow a theme

For any day(s) that you want, post something that follows one or more prompt! You don't have to include all three prompts in a single work; you can pick either one, two, or all three prompts to incorporate in.

Where can I go if I have any questions?

Feel free to leave me an ask or hop into my DMs if you have any questions about the event, or about what content is or isn't acceptable as a submission.

What are the rules?

If you want to submit something for the event, then make it in a post, tag me in it, and label the post with #crying child weekend bash so I can reblog any submissions!

Do NOT make content shipping CC with anyone, and don't include any smut in anything you make for the event. I won't reblog it if you do.

Triggering content disclaimer: you're free to make content as dark as you want. Body horror, severe injuries, murder, character death, etc are all welcome, but you MUST make sure to tag and trigger warning this kind of content. If I notice something isn't tagged appropriately, I'll bring it up to you privately, but if you don't fix it then I won't reblog.

That being said, this weekend bash isn't necessarily about angst works. A lot of the prompts seem angsty, but I tried to put in a good mix of prompts so that if you want to make a fluff piece or a humor piece without any angst in it, then you should be able to do so. Fluff and crack are as welcome as angst pieces are!

This should go without saying, but the works should center around the Crying Child, not any other character.

If you mixed up your calender or a certain work took longer than you thought and you don't have it finished by the day the prompt is, you're more than welcome to post your work on a different day. I'm not gonna be too strict about deadlines; we're all here to have fun, right?

@justalittleegg @doombum @pey-up @cloudwhisper45 @angeygirl @fyrefrostanimus @connectionterminated13 @catwithacupofcoffee @crumbleclub @honey-bunnysaurus @dire-kumori @raven-the-haven @puhpandas @soniccrazygal @destefaniart @serenefig @raccoon-in-a-dumpster

#crying child weekend bash #crying child #the crying child #evan afton #chris afton #norman afton #cc afton #fnaf #fnaf 4 #the afton family #the afton kids #fnaf event

[dangerpronebuddie]

Kiss Me Once Cause You Know I Had A Long Night 29/?

71. Lingering forehead against forehead, consumed by each other to the point of barely having strength enough to breathe

Summary:

"So what's this revelation you wanted to tell me about?" Eddie tossed his keys on the counter and stood in front of Buck. The setting sun offered just enough light to see the softness in his eyes, and the slight curve of his lips.

(read below!)

Buck took another long pull of his beer. It did nothing for his nerves. He knew he had nothing to worry about, not really.

But telling Eddie would open a door he'd long thought closed. Since the day Shannon came back.

Opening it was dangerous. If, by some tiny chance, Eddie loved him back and it didn't work, he'd be throwing away the best friendship- the best relationship- he'd ever known.

Keys jingling behind the door drew him from his quickly growing spiral. He wiped his surprisingly sweaty palms on his thighs and stood as Eddie came in.

"Sorry I'm late," Eddie said as he entered the loft, "there was construction on Sunset."

"I knew you'd get here eventually," Buck said with a smile. The last time Eddie was late was because of Ana. Now, not even Marisol stopped him (Buck did not do a happy dance when Eddie told him about the breakup yesterday. He did not).

"So what's this revelation you wanted to tell me about?" Eddie tossed his keys on the counter and stood in front of Buck. The setting sun offered just enough light to see the softness in his eyes, and the slight curve of his lips.

"Well, you know the other day when I uh... came out to you and Chris?" Buck asked, wringing his hands.

Eddie nodded.

"I was... I was wondering if m- maybe..."

Why was it so hard? Eddie was his best friend, it should be easy. But... maybe that's why it's not. If they tried it, and it didn't work-

"Buck," Eddie said softly, clapping a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "you know there isn't a thing you can say to me to make me walk away."

Buck ducked his head with a bashful smile, his lower lip between his teeth. Eddie's thumb swept across his pulse point, encouraging him and grounding him at the same time.

He took a deep breath and looked into Eddie's eyes. "Would you like to go out on a date? W- with me?"

Slowly, like the sun rising, a smile appeared on Eddie's face. A smile so bright and beautiful it made his eyes crinkle. God, Buck loved him.

"Yes," Eddie said with a happy giggle. "I'd love to go out with you."

Buck couldn't help the relieved breath he let out. He couldn't believe his ears, his eyes. It wasn't all in his head. Eddie had feelings for him too.

"I have one question though," Eddie asked, the smile transforming into possibly the hottest smirk Buck had ever seen.

"What's that?" Buck asked.

Eddie placed a steady hand on his waist. "Do I have to wait till after our date to kiss you?"

Buck giggled and wrapped his arms around Eddie's waist, drawing him in. "I'm done waiting," Buck whispered before pressing his lips to Eddie's.

He expected stars, or supernovas, or at the very least confetti canons. Instead, all he felt was a sense of home, of rightness. A band in his chest unfurled as the hand on his shoulder slowly came to rest at the nape of his neck.

Eddie pulled away and rested their foreheads together. "Wow," he whispered.

"Yeah," Buck said with a breathless chuckle.

Eddie leaned in again, slotting their lips together. Buck pulled them flush together as Eddie teased the seam of his lips apart. Sparks flew down Buck's spine, lighting every nerve on fire. Lightning couldn't compare.

They kissed until the need for oxygen pulled them apart. Buck rested his forehead against Eddie's, his hands splayed across his back.

"Is it too soon to tell you I love you?" Eddie asked.

"I think we've been saying it for years," Buck said. The door he was so afraid had been closed was always open, just waiting for them to step through. Together.

"I love you," Eddie said, pressing a chaste, already familiar kiss to Buck's lips.

"I love you," Buck grinned against his lips.

They did go on their first date... after a few other firsts.

#911 #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie #911 abc #9-1-1 #fanfic #911 spoilers #s7 #my writing #Kiss Me Once #I'll add it to ao3 when it's back #i just had to get it out of my head #911 speculation #kinda #i know it won't but oh well

[transgender-battlekukku]

Sonic opinions that may or may not be controversial

Sonic character design is at its worst when they try to make it as "Sonic-like" as possible, and at its best when it's at its most unconventional (i.e. Fang the Sniper, the Witchcarters, the Kukku Empire, the humans in Sonic Unleashed and Chronicles, SatAM and AOSTH characters, etc)

Infinite's maskless design is lame

Sally Acorn, Amy Rose, Princess Elise and Lanolin aren't the worst characters, you just want to hate female characters. There are way worse written characters and you choose those three to bash on

That said, Chris Thorndyke and Charmy Bee aren't annoying, you just hate children. Chris' unwilling to let Sonic go in the finale of Sonic X's season two wasn't a dick move, that's his character arc. And of course Charmy being loud, annoying and basically dooming the resistance by turning himself into a zombot to try and save someone makes sense. He's a god damn six year old

Ian Flynn trying to "simplify" Fang the Sniper takes away all that made him interesting, his weirdness and confusing design (he literally took away Fang's hybrid side and him being originated from the Special Zone. Blaze exists, why can't Fang be from another dimension too?)

Gemerl not having Emerl's personality isn't neither a betrayal nor a bad take on his character. In fact, it makes his contrast with Emerl and comparison to Omega and Metal Sonic better. Shard is not coming back guys. Cope

Sonic Forces should've been less focused on Classic Sonic and more on the Rookie. In fact, Shadow should've replaced Classic Sonic in the storyline

Sonic Colors is worse than Sonic 06 in terms of storyline and the DS version should've been the real deal

As fun and awesome and amazing as Sonadow is (totally not speaking from bias), making it non-canon is the best for everyone

Characters like Shadow and Omega shouldn't have a classic form, but it would be interesting to see other modern characters in classic form

Classic characters shouldn't be confined to the "classic universe". Archie's best parts were when classic and modern characters interacted (Mighty and the Werehog, Shadow and the Hooligans, Jet and Speedy)

The idea of the Babylon Rogues being associated to the Kukku Empire in the past IS an interesting concept. What isn't is the Kukku Empire being associated with the Babylon Garden. They should be their own villains

As goofy as Sonic Chronicles was, it wasn't a bad game at all

Western and eastern Sonic media should be treated with the same respect

Sonic characters acting immature shouldn't be a big deal. They are kids, no matter how many times you point out how they removed the ages at the Sonic Channel site. Amy Rose herself was at her best when she was an immature hotheaded girl

As much as I wish Silver was more serious at IDW, him acting excited and happy isn't bad either. He's healing from multiple broken futures

Silver and Blaze are better staying out as platonic. If Sonic and Shadow's tanabata references can be seen as platonic, then those two can two. That said, their relationship should still be seen as meaningful to both of them (perhaps more to Silver than to Blaze). Male and female friendships exist without it being instantly romantic

MORE. UNSEEN. CHARACTER. INTERACTIONS. PLEASE

Sonic Shuffle shouldn't be shafted just because of the weird gameplay and human-like characters. The Maginaryworld characters should make a comeback (ESPECIALLY with to the implications of the angel statue in Sonic CD's Wacky Workbench)

We need more truly irredeemable female villains (Surge doesn't count, I'm talking about characters like Witchcart, Lien-Da, Thunderbolt)

For the love of God, Sega. Bring Classic characters back

If you can give personality to Metal Sonic and Mecha Sonic II, you can give to the other robots (and no, making Tails Doll an eldritch horror doesn't count)

Hyper Sonic should come back. Maybe even make it the "third stage" to the Super Sonic and Super Sonic 2 duo

As good and amazing as Amy's everything was in Sonic the Comic, that shouldn't be the blueprint of her canon character. At max bring back her crossbow (and her girlfriend)

Tails Adventure is better taking place before Sonic and Tails meeting. If he was confident enough to follow Sonic and help him defeat Eggman's ass he should be confident enough to abolish the monarchy (last part is /hj lmao)

Tails Adventure mentioned, the Kukku Empire should make a comeback too. If Shadow can come back the Kukkus can. They weren't cntrl+alt+del from existence like Mephiles was y'know

We don't want to see the classic universe. We want to see classic CHARACTERS

Sega. Hey Sega. Sega. Are you hearing me. Sega. Bring classic characters back Sega. Sega-

Post-genesis wave Archie character designs sucks ass. The color palettes make it worst (Antoine I'm looking directly at you)

#long post #sth #archie sonic #sonic idw #stc #sonic the comic #i am NOT tagging all the characters #sonic x #sonic forces #sonic colors #sonic chronicles #sonic satam #aosth #sonic 06 #sonic shuffle #sonic frontiers #tails adventure #text post

[kidrauhlschik]

Let The World Burn. - I.N. 3

In the end, he managed to forget that a king is nothing without his queen.

~

Part 1, 2, & 4 will be linked in the master list above!

Pairings: Jeongin x Reader (and some love triangles among the way.) enemies to lovers, royalty au!

Warnings: ANGST, implied smut, war, aggression, anxiety, depression, death, please let me know if i miss anything... (this was heavily inspired by the song “Let the world burn” by Chris Grey.

Word Count: 2.1K

~

Life went on as normal. Responsibilities, meetings, and building ties in court. It felt like every day was longer than the last.

Felix took some time off due to personal reasons, but now he was back in full service as your advisor and best friend. It felt great, but you couldn't help but feel distanced from the freckled man.

Bang Chan would always be there when you needed him, it's as if he had abandoned Joengin's side to be there for you. Anytime Felix left you at night to get drunk in his chambers, Chan would keep you company. Humanizing Jeongin in his own way. To you, the king was a ruthless ruler and husband, but to Chan, he was a clueless younger sibling. It was odd and incomprehensible.

One day, months after your wedding, much to your surprise, Jeongin was standing in the middle of your chambers. Dressed in his usual attire. A black suit, golden accents and chains. You have never seen him in casual wear outside of your consummation night. He's only ever seen you as a business partner.

"What are you doing here?"

"Is that a way to address your king?" He stands before you, authoritatively.

"This is how I address anyone who comes into my chambers uninvited." You stand tall as well. Not letting Jeongin make you feel small once again.

"Funny thing, you are staying in my soil, my palace. As far as I am concerned, these are my chambers." He says as he extends his arms in a show of bashfulness.

"As far as I know, this is my soil too. I am the queen. Have you forgotten that, your highness?" You say with a chuckle, almost finding his stance comedic. He hasn't talked to you in months. You'd accepted him as an acquaintance. Now he wants to come into your room to interrogate you, it seemed outrageous to you.

"That." He points at you, before he turns towards your window. "You always do that." His hands rest against the window seal, allowing his weight to rest on his shoulders.

"I am sorry my king, but I am afraid that I am not understanding what you are saying."

You frustrate him. He can’t quite put his feelings into words, but you keep him up at night. He pushes himself off the window in desperation.

"I am saying... That I do not understand how you can be so casual about everything. Despite it all, you stand tall, and stubborn. It truly gets under my skin." His voice slowly gets louder with every word. What he doesn’t say is that the way you switch from innocent and precious, to authoritative and ruthless in the blink of an eye astonishes him. It seems fake, it infuriates him.

"I apologize my king, but I am still clueless as to what is your agenda here."

"STOP!" You take a step back, surprised at his tone.

"You are scared! You are unsure! You are mad! You know how I know this? That’s because that’s what I am going through! I am going absolutely mad. Is this deal not breaking you down the same way it's breaking me?" He runs his hands through his hair, eyes wild.

"Jeongin..."

"How can you be so strong despite the circumstances? Why the hell are you always so happy and chirpy? The world is harsh, and I know that you are aware of that. I’ve seen you with your claws out." He grabs a glass from your table and fills it with the pitcher of wine next to it.

"If all hope dies, then why should I continue living?" You tilt your head while looking at him.

"That's what I mean! You are so foolish. The world isn't made of hope. This world is based on strength. Only the strongest survive." He takes the a swig from the glass of wine. “I don’t want to keep hearing your bullshit! You go on your little act of fairy godmother to the people and then you turn around and make commands in court, and if something doesn’t go your way, you throw a damn tantrum until you get your way. It never makes sense.”

"Sometimes the weakest people win from hope, When you have nothing, there is nothing to lose. Do not underestimate that my king. Also, do not make any assumptions on my character based on what you see in court, you do not know me. I am strong for the sake of my people, it is not an act." You say as you try to guide the wine glass down from his hand, but instead he gathers anger and throws the glass to the nearest wall, causing you to jump when it makes impact.

"How?" His eyes search the ground, at a loss, hoping to find some answers in his own brain. Now it made sense, the king had been drinking. You don’t know him enough to realize it at first, but now you can see. His hair out of place, his eyes glassy, and his usual calm and controlled demeanor is nowhere to be seen.

Feeling bold, you approach him, only a couple of inches away from his face. "Maybe I am foolish, but I would much rather be foolish and confident in a world of tyrants that think they know it all. The higher you stand, the bigger the fall. Do not forget that my king." You say as you leave him in your chambers.

~

After seeing Jeongin in your room, you opted for your safe space, the garden.

Just as you were about to reach the doors leading you to the west side of the palace, you encounter one of your ladies, Rose.

You expected to just curtuoly nod at her, but the second she saw you, she stopped in her tracks. "Your highness." Is all she said.

"Rose?" You responded without turning around as you passed her.

"What are your intentions in court?"

"I am sorry?" You've always been kind to those of lower class, treating them as equals. However, as a princess, you learned very quickly when someone undermines you. Their tone is more aggressive, demanding, and authoritative. The only people that you allow to speak with you in such way, are your own parents, but that was when you were still a princess under their rule. As a queen, it would take pure imurdinance for someone to speak to you in such way.

Yet, Rose stands before you, with the imprudienty of no other.

"Stop acting clueless. You came here trying to stir up the diplomacy at court. We have a way of doing things here and you think you have a right to change them?”

You finally turn to her, "I have every right to change what I please. I am your queen.”

Rose lets out a humorless chuckle, "You may be the queen but you are not my queen."

You wondered if she was stupid or just insane.

Taken aback, you respond, "I beg your pardon?"

"Don't play coy, your mind games are getting to the king," that surprises you. "He won't shut up about you. Always ranting over your tantrums and schemes. You make him seem small and weak. A king does not listen to a woman."

"I am not just a woman, should I repeat myself? I am the queen. He has no choice but to listen to me if he means for this alliance to work. Either way, this is none of your concern. You are my lady, what right do you think you have in this manner?" You approach her, standing a foot away from her now. Although you stand tall and straight, she seems to match your energy. Proud and strong.

"I have a right, despite your beliefs. I am the king's mistress." It catches you off guard. Sure, you knew that Jeongin has never loved you, or even liked you, but you thought that he had enough respect for you as a royal to at least be faithful to you.

How foolish.

"Oh." Is all you can say.

"You may be the ruler of the country, but I am the ruler of his heart. your highness. He cares for you out of convenience, if you could even call it that. Just be aware, that I can see through you. You are a stranger in this court, and once I can get rid of you, you will be gone in the blink of an eye." She says with a smirk.

You raise your hand ready to strike her, but she stops your hand by holding your wrist mere inches away from her face.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you. The king is rather protective over me. Be aware that he has told me that he will choose me before his rights as a first born, tread carefully queen YN." She throws your hand to the side and turns quickly to walk away.

At her words, you take a second to watch her walk away, "You as well, lady Rose."

~

You only told Felix about what happened with Rose. He tried to convince you to tell the king, but you knew he wouldn't be on your side, especially after seeing how bold his mistress was.

The word, mistress, hurt you. You should have expected it, but the glass in your world seemed to crack a bit more.

"YN, I just want you to be happy." The blonde haired man says to you.

"I know Felix, but realistically, can you see me happy here? The more I think about it, I'm going to live a life of misery next to Jeongin."

"You knew this YN." He is sitting on your bed, trying to console you.

"I don't know what I knew Felix. I thought I had something here. I thought I had pride, I thought I had dignity. Turns out, I am nothing. I am a queen by name. The king only agrees to my terms because he needs my troops. Otherwise, my country would be bare to the rest of the world. I truly don't know what to do." You sit next to him on your bed, tears streaming down your face.

"Hey hey," He holds your hand and looks into your eyes. "You are strong, you're a benevolent queen, you are respected, you do not need an immature king to acknowledge you." Felix wipes your tears away with his left hand, as his right hand hold yours. "You know I will always be here for you." In between sobs, you hold eye contact with your best friend.

Has he always been so handsome? So ethereal that his glossy eyes are enough to mesmerize you? His face, is kind, and beautiful, it's bewildering that you've never noticed that before.

If the king can have a lover, the thought of one crosses your mind.

"Felix?" Your face, inches away from his.

"Yes? Your highness?" You smile at his words, always so light hearted.

"Do you love me?" His heart stops before he could collect himself.

"Of course I do my queen." He says with no hesitation.

Your free hand reaches his face with affection, "No Felix. I am not asking you if you love me as a queen, but as a woman. You are loyal and handsome, maybe I am foolish to think that you may like me as anything other than a friend, but maybe I am feeling bold. Do you think we could be-"

Before you can finish your sentence, your chamber doors fly open.

"Where the hell is the new queen?" His voice booms through the room as if it was amplified.

You and Felix jump away from each other, the moment gone before it began.

You look towards the source of disruption, first with concern but the second your eyes lock with his, your harsh demeanor falls.

"Minho!" You shout as you run to the older mans arms, leaving Felix behind.

"Hey princess..." He whispers softly to you, "How's it been?" In response you only hold him tighter.

After collecting himself, Felix stands as well, "Isn't it rude to ignore your comrade?" He says with his arms crossed against his chest, feigning sadness.

Minho let's you go after a bit while rolling his eyes, "Yeah whatever yongbok, I missed you too."

He goes to give a hearty hug to Felix. "Nice to see you man."

"I've missed you."

Minho breaks the hug first, "Damn, it's been less than a year, why are the two of you acting so sad and proper?"

Both you and Felix look at each other before you respond, "It's been a hell of a year Min."

~

AN: Okay only two chapters left unless I make it a really long one. This was supposed to be the long one, but I worked 60+ hours this week - i did my best :/

#stray kids #stray kids imagine #kpop imagine #stray kids x reader #bang Chan #lee know #changbin #seungmin #Hyunjin #Felix #Yongbok #Han Jisung #Jeongin #angst #fluff #fanfic #y/n #enemies to lovers #non idol au #mini series #skz #stray kids x reader angst #skz x reader fluff #skz x reader angst #royal au #royal!skz #prince jeongin #king jeongin #royalty #kingdom

[laylawatermelon]

Y'all i just cracked the davinci code and idk if you're gonna like it.

As a Buddie fan devastated obviously, as a 9-1-1 fan devastated obviously and as a writer absolutely blown away by the finessing they just graced us with.

They literally found a way to make Eddie straight and by God they've done it successfully.

Lemme explain.

I was locked in when he was having the speech with Shannon and didn't get to deep in the emotions (heinous ik but I wanted to hear what he was feeling).

I did get some water wobbles in my chest but that's neither here nor there. I did scream horrifically at the cliffhanger of the show.

Guess the nun did scare the life out of her (and me!) after all! Heeh should've seen that coming honestly but I didn't think they'd go there.

So there's two things I think is gonna happen, one Eddie's gonna go on more straight woman dates (yay 😮‍💨) and Chris is leaving.

Now the second one I'll address first and don't bash me if it's not trueee.

I'll get the Chris one over with. First Gavin, Chris' actor, family moved. Since he's become a main he's had little to no screentime in the show.

What I think has happened in real life it's that Gavin will step away from the show. They have him main to show his importance in the cast and storyline (i can also guess pay raise but I'm not saying that's unreasonable really) before his send off.

Realistically he's a disabled person, a child/minor at that, who i assume has a lot of equipment and things he has to travel with. I can imagine it's not that easy to consistently travel across states with equipment, doctor's appointments, schoolwork etc.

So this is probably his last season for a while.

The birthday party (which can also double as a send off or until next time message) and the promotion/upgrade in role despite not being written as such or having storyline outside of the adults.

(off topic but I'd love a mini 118 hijinks b story with all the kids or a low stakes disaster where they all team up until the 118 get there)

He's been hypocritical to him about cheating and even tarnished his mom's legacy by bringing a fake version of her in his house.

The reason i can say the story can effectively write him off for the first half of next season is that Chris will go with his other family because he feels betrayed by his dad.

He doesn't feel safe anymore (😞😭 I'm making myself sad) so he opts to leave until his dad gets better.

The hospital scene is Eddie realizing what his kid needs isn't a new mom but to trust in his parents and that's now shattered (ooh this starting to feel personal be gone trauma!).

So he'll throw a tantrum (a rightfully deserved one that's my boy😤) and say in anger he doesn't want to be with his dad.

Buck will obviously be there cause yeah Eddie (delusional hubby) clearly needs help in his hour of need and so does Chris.

Eddie will do self isolation. Buck will be there for him (Tommy probably staying too but I'm neutral for this post) but with everything Eddie going through he's gonna be wrecked.

And because Eddie's a (good? Eh so so right now) dad he'll let Chris decide when he wants to return.

Hence the heartbreak.

Boom it solves the Gavin problem where he can probably stay during the summer so maybe mid season 8 or limited role like how they did this season and his family can focus on him/life.

Now the Straight Eddie!

By God he's done it!

You've pulled a real good one. Tim I salute you truly.

Idk how you made a straight man out of him but by his you've done it!

(so did you Ryan I'm watching you!)

Since buddie isn't on the table this season the platonic hasn't been more platonic-er since season 7 episode 1.

The way he did it was so easy and smooth I'm in awe.

This is how he kept and can probably enforce straight Eddie.

This is also how he can not enforce straight Eddie (haha got you).

The line you were the love of my life but I'm living it without you now stuck out to me.

That means he's going to find himself and what he really likes without a partner. Therapy, hobbies all that good ish. Maybe a few dates but def church.

Here's why.

Church has been something he drift away and let's be honest American tv and society is still founded in Christianity and all of its adjacent branches.

You must have God somewhere in there for the older audience to tune in/connect with of it's getting a lil secular (aka the bundle of lgbt characters. They're probably saying at least one of em knows God😮‍💨😮‍💨) /hj

The book of prayers symbolizes him going back to God to find answers about himself.

Anyways for the straight Eddie he can get closer to himself better in his faith and get a nice Christian girl who he matches with and (maybe) even has a kid/ similar background.

Since he's been to therapy and he's let go of the love of his life he's now free to find love in someone else. A new woman. (And truly this time)

(or a man, or they/them)

Yes my queer Eddie agenda rises!

Go FORTH!

BE ONE WITH THE SKITTLES SQUAD!

But seriously though the other way it can go is that he's discovering stuff about himself away from romance. He becomes more comfortable with religion but when confusing feelings (attraction to the same gender anyone for $10?) arise then he'll maybe start to fight his Catholic guilt about it since he's gotten closer to it.

Then he'll have to ask for for forgiveness but not permission for the live he wants to live.

(with buck in a house on the waves! Let me be delusional! I've kept it under wraps this long!)

But anyways they've truly dodged the lgbt fruity storyline.

They've also shown us that yes, Buddie was NOT platonic because I've never felt more friends energy in my life this season.

And what the AuDHD brain says is canon/not canon I vibe accordingly.

The vibes were low. Like a suspiciously low.

Dare I say subtextually low.

That's not happened in the history of buddie this is a code red!

CODE RED!

Okay I'm done btw hate me or whatever! /big J

#911 abc #evan buckley #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #buckley diaz family #911 fox #911thursdaytakeover #911 meta #911 speculation #buddie #oliver stark #ryan guzman #long post #911 spoilers #911 season 7 #911 season 8 speculation

[iconsumethesoulsofthedamned]

I'm actually so pissed at all the "doctor who fans" who are bashing 15. if you didn't like 13's writing I could get it. She was done dirty by the script but even then she had some great moments! (I'm a 13 enjoyer even though I did not like chris chibnall's handling that much) but like the 15 bashing is insane.

What 'wokeness' ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT?!?!? we're like 6 episodes in and its been standard ass doctor who shit I'm gonna go ahead and say its been less 'woke' then previous seasons. The only thing that's different? He's black. Just say you're racist and leave the damn fandom. That's right go on. LEAVE.

If the doctor thinking a man is attractive is too much then why didn't you leave way back in season 1 of new who? Nine and Jack flirted and kissed and also just Jack in general should've been too 'woke' for you.

Can you not handle the doctor being anti war? Let me tell you you should've left during season 4 because there's this episode called the doctors daughter, ever heard of it? Well go look up genocide in the dictionary and there will be a picture of the doctor with the caption "OVER MY DEAD BODY"

Oh and is showing racism too 'woke' for your lovely white sensibilities?? DID YOU SOMEHOW MANAGE TO MISS THE DALEKS??!? everything that isn't Dalek is bad? is inferior?? DID YOU MANAGE TO MISS WHAT WAS DONE TOO THE OOD?? Did you miss 12 punching that racist in the face in thin ice?

It's funny because I don't think you missed any of it I just think that now that He's different than you you can't handle it. Now that the alien with two hearts doesn't look exactly like you you cannot fathom him being a well written, well acted person. I think you're an idiot who loves a show about saving everyone and about the beauty of humanity until suddenly there's a person you don't like up on your screen. I think you're worse then the Daleks cause at least they own up to what they are.

#the doctor #doctor who #15th doctor #doctor who meta #racism #new who #ncuti gatwa #doctor who fandom #doctor who critical

[whore-for-chris-evans]

Instead of ranting about Alba Baptista, her outfits, the pictures of them and so on, why don't you use that all that pent up energy to create something positive, for example, What If S2 Rogers Hood fanfics, because he's a wonderful character, and it's a really interesting setting that deserves to be exploited in fanfics? Or maybe alternate endings to ep 5 that don't completely dismiss Bucky and his lifetime bond with Steve?

Now I know some of you have zero creative ability and you're here just to doom scroll, read and reblog, and that's okay as long as you don't make this app a living hell for other people who don't see eye to eye with you. But please find something better to do than obsess over two strangers who literally do not affect your life in any way whatsoever and please stop bashing a woman against whom there's virtually zero proof of whatever claims you're making.

No, "a man is known by the company he keeps" does not apply to a friendship/relationship you've only seen online pictures of. You do not know the true nature of Alba's friendship with Justin and Kiko, so the assumption that she must share and/or be a supporter of the same beliefs as them is just harmful.

You'd have a lot to say about my mother if you knew her for a while, things not unlike what you say about Alba, but just because I share a roof with her and have some kind of a bond with her does NOT mean I am racist/transphobic/queerphobic like her. You would not have the right to pass judgment on me unless you knew me personally. By the same logic, you don't know shit about Alba's personal life so you definitely should not be talking shit about her.

No I am not supporting discriminative and offensive behaviour out of fondness for a handsome actor (I actually love him for more than looks, not that you care). If that were the case, I wouldn't have had the courage to spend an entire evening reading up everything I could find about Alba Baptista - I'd just be brushing everything under the carpet. I am saying everything I'm saying right now because I did my research and my verdict is that she does not deserve this harrassment.

As for whether it's PR or a real relationship, it actually doesn't fucking matter to you or me or anyone in this godforsaken fandom (why am I even calling it a fandom when most of you are just haters?) The world does not spin differently based on Chris Evans' marriage. Maybe yours does, and that's sad, but the big blue geoid we live on certainly doesn't.

Tumblr can be used for much better purposes than wishing death and destruction on an otherwise unproblematic man whose only crime is marrying a woman who isn't one of you.

#chris evans #alba baptista #chris evans fandom #y'all are more fucking toxic than the Chernobyl power plant #purposeless idiots

[chuuwtoy]

i remember discussing with my friend if rebecca was really the blushing virgin that everyone in the fandom makes her out to be. at the time i just shrugged it off and said yes, because i didn't know much about her character (not that there is much anyway.) but after thinking about it, my opinion's changed a bit. so here's my random opinions about rebecca.

incoming airstrike: incoherent rambling.

initially i felt like rebecca was only really put into the first game to be jill's opposite, and also i guess to make it even and put a girl on the other team.

i haven't played RE 0 (and with the complaints i probably won't..) but she isn't exactly squealing and blushing whenever billy looks her way - if anything, billy is more of a flirt. maybe him giving her all these cute nicknames is just in his nature? or perhaps he just really likes her. who knows!

you could argue that everyone on her team died and she's going through this hellish nightmare on her first mission - so why on earth would she have goo-goo eyes over some inmate who supposedly slaughtered 23 people?! haha, i love analyzing these guys.

rebecca isn't afraid to put anyone in their place, she demands respect, "but that's officer chambers to you", "and dont call me little girl!" one thing i love about these lines is how it's delivered, she isn't stomping her feet and throwing a tantrum. she keeps her soft tone and says it sharply! i wish people saw her as spunkier and dominant, rather than an innocent, helpless baby.

suprisingly, she doesn't fall for chris either. i mean can you blame me for expecting her to? he's protecting her throughout the game and vice versa. she's tired and scared but atleast she has chris to lean onto. that's the perfect set up for a predictable (one-sided) romance. the same arguement could be made - she's tired, and got thrusted into another nightmare, she doesn't have time to be flustered over chris..

something that's a little odd but rebecca has respect for chris in the sense that she refers to him as "sir", when she doesn't even do that for enrico. though, im sure its because she's familiar with enrico, but not chris.

she's oddly professional for her age, but no one in the fandom gives her credit for it— and yes i know it's probably because she's a child prodigy, so perhaps she had to grow up quicker? i assume she was around adults much older than herself. ( ≧ᗜ≦) !!!

i know it's common for people to call her a tomboy because "girl + short hair = tomboy" (sarcasm). though, if i'm being honest, i never saw her as one. rebecca (and jill) are just girls, they can't really be placed into boxes - they're not clichés. you see the duality with rebecca loving basketball but also being a chemist? i LOVE that so much. she's in this male-dominated field with an age that still end in -teen.

rebecca is described as "androgynous" in her uniform and while i agree to some extent i don't really like that word too much, because it implies that jill's uniform isnt androgynous when i think that it is.. so what because jill's chest is prominent she can't be androgynous too? hmph, it always left a bitter taste in my mouth.

also i really love that she's wearing makeup in 0, it's her first mission and she's all dolled up 笑笑笑笑笑 but they stopped using ayumi's model and i guess wanted to rework her face.

this isn't meant to disprove or bash that very popular ship "rebilly" by the way! do i ship it? not quite, sorry but i dont ship anything besides myself and a certain bioterrorist えへへへへへへへへ

the novel, caliban cove, portrays her as your typical teenage girl. she gets embarrassed a lot, blushes at the slightest contact, etc etc. it's not canon though, so i didnt bother to mention it.

i haven't discussed this either but i'd like to see discussions about her sexuality, nothing is confirmed but options are always open (ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ.ﾟ

#resident evil #rebecca chambers #jill valentine #billy coen #chris redfield

[mairaiscarrierofthepaperclips]

Seven(ish) sentences . . . Wednesday?

I heard a line in another show I was watching, and just thought, 'yep, that's Buck.'

Let it be known that I hate the Elder Buckleys with a passion.

I'm hoping to turn this into a short fic, I guess we'll have to wait and see. Here's a snippet.

The door slammed, echoing loudly in the space. That conversation had been a long time coming, and while he hated the pain Buck was in, Eddie knew it would be okay. Eventually. He turned back to Buck, unsurprised to see him with his elbows on his knees, pushing the heels of his hands into his eye sockets. "I'm sorry." "What?" Eddie blinked. Why was Buck apologising? He had nothing to apologise for, especially not to Eddie. "I'm sorry my family is such a nightmare." His mouth twisted, and something in Eddie's heart cracked. "Buck." His voice was sharp, sharper than it probably should be, but Buck needed to hear this. Eddie strode over to the table, reaching out and gripping Buck's shoulder as his thumb slipped into the spot under his collarbone. Bright blue eyes looked up at him, rimmed in red and so tired. "Buck," he said again, softening his tone even as he made sure Buck could hear the steel in his voice. "Margaret and Philip Buckley are your relatives. We, all of us? The 118, and Chris, and Maddie? We are your family." Eddie dipped his head when Buck dropped his gaze, waiting until the other man stopped avoiding him. "Family isn't blood, Buck, it's what you make it. And we've made a damn good one."

Any excuse for me to bash the Elder Buckleys in fiction, really.

#The Elder Buckleys are actually the worst #family is what you make it #family don't end with blood #911 fox #buddie #911 buddie #evan buckley #buck x eddie #eddie diaz #seven sentences sunday #fics #snippets #tag games #ao3 fanfic #ao3 #ao3 writer #fanfic #archive of our own #fanfiction #Maira's fics

[carewyncromwell]

"Well, well -- looks like we caught a little princess."

"'Extremely dangerous: keep out of reach of children.' ...Cool!"

x~x~x~x

Hey, I said I'd have more of my characters dressed up for Halloween! Well, here's Carewyn and Jacob's uncle, Blaise Cromwell, and his son, Tristan, dressed as Colonel Muska from Studio Ghibli's Castle in the Sky and Sid Phillips from Pixar's Toy Story, respectively! I'll be honest, I did waffle a little on who I was going to dress these two up as, but I'm overall really happy with how they turned out!

Blaise's second choice was Magnifico from the upcoming film Wish, since that character is voiced by Chris Pine, my face claim for Blaise...but honestly, we know so little about the character so far that I couldn't really guess how proper of a fit the casting would be, and honestly, most of what I've gathered so far led me to think it's not as good of a fit. However smug and arrogant Blaise can be, he really isn't a show-off, vain, or interested in positive attention from the masses, the way Magnifico seems to be...so ultimately Colonel Muska -- easily my favorite Ghibli villain of all time -- felt like a better fit to me. Just like Muska, Blaise is more than crafty enough to emotionally manipulate others to get his way, and his motivation honestly comes back to his family line. He's not the sort to want the world to love or praise him, but he is absolutely the sort to want the power he feels is owed him by his heritage, and he has been poisoned enough by Charles's toxic masculinity to bypass values like compassion and nurturing kindness in favor of violence and control. Not to mention I could totally see Blaise "coddling" Carewyn in a similar way that Muska "coddles" Sheeta, acting all understanding and decent until he's challenged and put in a position where he might not get what he wants. And honestly, Mark Hamill just knocks the SOCKS off Muska in the dub, which is the version of Muska I first encountered as a girl!!

My second choice for Tristan was Victor Van Dort from Tim Burton's Corpse Bride...but I'm sorry, as much as Tristan has the "isolated, piano-playing Goth boy" element down, especially in his fashion sense as an adult, I felt like Victor just didn't capture the slightly messed-up, darkness-loving, eccentric aspect of Carewyn's youngest cousin. Tristan loves studying both human and animal anatomy, to the extent that he has a dog skeleton in his room and dresses it up like a pet. He finds macabre amusement in telling Carewyn that Hogsmeade village got burned to the ground by the Death Eaters. He has no social skills and has a bad tendency to boss people around when he wants something rather than use even the barest amount of politeness. TELL ME that doesn't remind you of a certain crazy neighborhood bully with a love of ripping toys apart and putting them back together in freakish creations. Plus, I'll just be honest, working at the Oogie Boogie Bash at Disneyland, Sid's meet-and-greets are just ridiculously fun. Fortunately unlike a lot of other Disney and Pixar "villains," Sid isn't a truly evil person -- just an incredibly mean-spirited kid -- and considering he does seem to have chilled out by movie 3 enough to get a cameo working as a garbageman, I'd like to think that like Tristan does, Sid eventually matured a bit and maybe became a slightly better person.

Happy Halloween, all! Much love!! xoxo 🎃

#hphm #hogwarts mystery #my art #blaise cromwell #tristan cromwell #halloween #castle in the sky #toy story

[awesomefringey]

You know what's funny? Elk is again absent from the important last date of Louis' first solo world tour (but then again she didn't attend his first date in Dallas this year either). From her socials she's been shopping and attended a wedding on 3 September 2022, which fair enough if it's a close friend or family, but out of 78 tour dates she attended about 5 (2 NY, 2 LA, London).

Also funny is Louis' band and crew having their wives and girlfriends on tour, like Matt and Zak had their partners in Spain. In Italy Tom Frisco had his Tash wife, and she filmed Chris Frewin's gf Amy Crawford at last night's Milan fest. Elk and Amy are friends, and they hung out at Glastonbury, they socialize together outside the big group, and even went on holiday overseas together. I'm happy she isn't weighing Louis down and he can fully enjoy himself with his touring crew without her around. But it is interesting when you look at their interactions.

I respect Eleanor for it really. She’s doing the bare minimum to keep the few Elounor shippers and Clifford fans happy and is only around when business and press would expect it.

She seems very much aware that hardly anyone in the fandom buys it anyway and she’s got no interest in proving it after bearding for 8 years. For that alone - I’m not keen on some BUA and then have a new gf coming in with a mediocre IG account milking Louis for followers.

I never understand why people need to point out that Eleanor is a shitty girlfriend for not being there when her calendar seems empty. Why keep bashing her for her supposed shortcomings as a girlfriend when we all know she isn’t his girlfriend?

Also the way Olivia has embarrassed herself for two years now, (it’s obvious she is new to the bearding business and unaware that Harry’s fanbase knows stunting since he was a teenager) has given us a new appreciation for Eleanor’s non-chalance in just living her life. I’m grateful for the way she handles it and how it allows all of Louis’ fanbase to focus on him and not be distracted by octopus dance moves at the side of the stage.

#ask #elounor #holivia

[ystrike1]

Mayday Mayday Mayday! - By Gwendoline (7.5/10)

This is good, but every single chapter is comprised entirely of stereotypes. You already know what the plot is. It's handsome mafia guy x small time criminal dude who wishes he was dating someone more normal. The plot makes sense. Some chapters are genuinely funny, and the crime aspect sometimes feels serious. If you like the mafia (the romance novel version) pick this up.

Yoon is sexy. He's a promiscuous Korean man in Miami, and he's popular to boot. He's also a small time money launderer. Well, he was. Then he accidentally snags a huge client. One that he doesn't want. A troublesome one. A rich one. A hot one.

A powerful one.

Poor Yoon here isn't entirely innocent, and that's what makes him a good protagonist. Yoon despises violence. Blood and guns??? Nope. Not for him. The sight of blood makes him faint. Bloodless, traceless financial crimes are his thing. He has no doubt ruined countless lives. His work makes the rich and corrupt richer, but he's no killer.

Vasya is Russian, and his full real name is super long. He cuts up traitors and their families when they betray him. Also, he has a lame mafia alias. "Paybacker" is the name he uses when he's out killing. He owns a company which is a front for all of his wrongdoings. His money launderer is named Kay, but then Kay betrays him. Luckily Kay has a cute apprentice named Yoon. That's how the main couple meets. Yoon usually wouldn't interact with such a big shot, but Vasya needed a fiance man with Kay's skills.

Vasya does not trust or like Yoon at first. This is a little less cheesy than most mxm stories. Vasya is clearly interested, but he's not blind. He knows Yoon fears him, and that pisses him off. He's bisexual and he's model gorgeous. Everyone he has ever liked has thrown themselves at him. Yoon is more practical. He's slept with tons of sexy men already. Now, he wants a steady boyfriend. So, Vasya's killer charm isn't effective on him.

Yoon also has his own allies. This is Chris, a gay cop. Chris isn't evil or anything. He's just a corrupt, tough cop that gets shit done. He also parties at gay clubs alot. Seeing the police presented as morally grey is nice.

This is Yoon's rapey cousin, Dickless. Dickless is the worst part of this story. I understand that the trauma of rape is very serious. It does explain why Yoon fell into the criminal world pretty well, but Dickless is annoying. He's by far the worst character. He exists so Vasya can scowl and beat up a meaty punching bag to defend Yoon. Dickless doesn't get to keep his dick. He wasn't charged for raping Yoon, because of rape-apologist-statute-of-limitations- bullshit, so Vasya brings in a professional torturer...and Yoon stops him because he just wants Dickless to get out of his life. He doesn't give half a shit about Dickless. He doesn't want the death of Dickless on his conscience.

The middle part of this story is pretty fucked up. Yoon sweetly begs Vasya to let him go, because they are from different worlds. Vasya likes him, so surely he will listen...nope. Vasya PINCHES his lip until it bleeds and tells him their sex hook ups won't be over until he says so. So, basically most of the sex in this is dubious consent at best.

....The plot revolves around an obsession. I shouldn't be so shocked.

When Yoon sleeps with Vasya he regrets it. When Yoon starts to like Vasya he regrets it. When Yoon feels attracted to Vasya he regrets it. When Yoon pisses Vasya off he regrets it. When Yoon goes outside Vasya makes a bodyguard follow him. Vasya chooses most of Yoon's clothes. Oh boy toxic relationship here we come.

Does Yoon cry? Yes, but he gets shit done. Vasya does genuinely like him, and Yoon uses that. When Vasya tries to kill Chris, because jealousy...well...Yoon bashes his own head in with a rock to distract him. He literally forces Vasya to stop with the most extreme kind of last resort. It was unexpected. Good stuff.

The couple becomes happy. Remember. These are criminals. Yoon isn't a sweet boy that Vasya kidnapped. He's a sexually experienced, well connected financial criminal. He's very good at money laundering by the way. Vasya and Yoon enjoy their dates when Vasya isn't feeling crazy. I've seen worse couples. I've seen worse writing, but yes a completely happy ending is unrealistic. If you don't find it believable I don't blame you.

#yandere #male yandere #yandere male #yandere boy #recommendations #recs #rec #recommended #webtoon #yaoi #Mayday Mayday Mayday!

[daisyishedwig]

Glee tag game

I was tagged by @annepi-blog, thank you!

1. Favourite season 1 episode: Okay, so the obvious answer is Laryngitis because it's one of the absolutely best Kurt episodes in the whole show. But I also fucking hate everything about Rachel's storyline but Rose's Turn alone does kind of give it the leg up to still be the best episode anyway.

2. Favourite season 2 episode: Oh I've got so many contenders for this one. I love Furt and the relationships we get to see between Burt and Kurt and Kurt and Finn. But then Never Been Kissed is just a classic with it being Blaine's first episode and Chris' acting in it is just so so incredible. Blame It On The Alcohol would be a higher contender because I love drunk Blaine and I actually really enjoy Finn in that episode, which isn't something that happens a lot for me until season 4, but the writer's biphobia that they push onto Kurt really ruins it. But I think the actual winner would have to be Prom Queen. I love Kurt in that episode and I love it being the first time we start to see that Blaine's not perfect, that he's a little broken, a little fragile. It's underutilized, but it really sets up so much of what makes Blaine my favorite character to write.

3. Favourite season 3 episode: Okay, we all know it's Michael. Like of course The First Time, On My Way, and Dance With Somebody are all great episodes that I really love. But Michael is the episode I rewatch the most. And part of my love for it is, a) the cut Want You Back scene, and b) believing Seblaine to be genuine, very close friends which makes the slushee incident so much more heart-wrenching. But it's still such a good episode, especially for me with my deep love of angst and Sebastian Smythe, it's really just the best episode in general. Plus it has the added bonus of having the one and only Samcedes duet so, yeah, it's the best.

4. Favourite season 4 episode: Diva and Feud are both a lot of fun, even if a lot of what happens in them is really ridiculous. Guilty Pleasures is such a good Blam episode. And I love I Do for the flirty and thirsty sides of Klaine we get to see. But I do feel like, once again, the angst lover in me has to go with The Breakup. The Scientist and Don't Speak are two of my favorite songs on the whole show. Everyone's acting in that episode is just so so good. Darren and Chris just knock it out of the park in every single scene, and I will never cease to be awed by them.

5. Favourite season 5 episode: I would probably say Tested, because I always love an episode where Blaine gets to cry. And I love Elliot and everything that he does for Klaine in getting them to communicate. And I love getting to truly see Blaine acknowledge his self-worth issues instead of them just constantly being buried and locked away. A lot of the episode is weird and difficult to watch but the conversation that Klaine have at the end will always be one of my favorite Klaine scenes. Other contenders were Bash, because I love Kurt in that episode and once again we get angsty Blaine. And then New York New York because its when we first get to see Klaine actively working to fix the problems in their relationship instead of clinging to the past so tightly that they crush it entirely.

6. Favourite season 6 episode: God, this one is hard because I'm honestly not sure there's any episode that I truly love. Like The Hurt Lockers are iconic, and I love Chris' acting in 2009. But so much of that season is just weird and almost pointless that I'm not sure I have an episode I like enough to consider my favorite.

7. Episode that makes me cry: I haven't rewatched The Quarterback since it aired because of how much it makes me cry. Tested and The Breakup also both hurt a lot.

8. Episode that makes me laugh: The Hurt Lockers for sure

9. Favourite tribute episode: Michael obviously. It's probably my favorite episode of the whole show in general and the songs are so well done.

10. Favourite Christmas episode: Ooof, I love them all for different reasons, but there's just something about Blaine going to New York with Burt to comfort Kurt that will always get to me so it's gotta be Glee, Actually.

11. Episode with the best songs: Ooooh, probably the mashup episodes? I'm not sure I can pick one but it would be a tie between Never Been Kissed and Mash Off.

12. Favourite sectionals episode: Oh, I'm torn between Special Education and Hold On To Sixteen. I love Quinn and Sam getting a duet, and I love Valerie, and I love Mercedes and Tina getting to sing Dog Days Are Over (maybe I just love the lack of Rachel solos, lol). But I do love the set list in Hold On To Sixteen, I love Quinn singing Control, I love Kurt and Tina and Mike all getting solo parts in ABC. And of course The Troubletones are just so good.

13. Favourite regionals episode: I've gotta say On My Way even if it's largely just for Glad You Came and Cough Syrup. The actual competition doesn't matter much to me, but the Karofsky storyline was handled really well and I love Sebastian's apology to Blaine and the New Directions, and it's just good in general.

14. Favourite nationals episode: I really love the set list for Nationals in season 3, but I hate Rachel and so much of that episode is all about Rachel and her choking at her NYADA audition and somehow convincing Carmen Tibideux to come see her anyway. But on the other hand while I don't love the City of Angels set list for nationals as much, I do love the fact that they were all Finn's (and Cory's) favorite songs. And I love Burt and Carole being there. And I love Throat Explosion (or at least John Baptiste) actually being very kind and respectful of Finn's passing. I like that they didn't just lean hard into the show choir rivalry there and let them actually be humans who recognize the pain of the McKinley team. Also Throat Explosion's set was really good too.

15. Episode most people like but I don’t: I might get killed by my Klaine friends. But Love, Love, Love? At the time it aired I was super excited about the proposal, but now as an adult, I really wish it hadn't happened, especially not like that. Like I get that it's romantic in that big grand gesture that Kurt deserves and Blaine would always want to give him. But. They hadn't talked about it! While Kurt guessed it was coming on the drive, it still didn't leave him with anyway to actually pull Blaine aside and talk about it. And with multiple other show choirs there, including Sebastian, can you really expect Kurt to be able to say anything but yes? Like I would have loved for them to have a quiet, personal proposal. To have Blaine ask and have them talk about it and whether or not they're ready for that. And then they could do the big thing. But instead we got Kurt not being given a chance to think about if this is something he actually wants, and it leads to a lot of problems in the future for them.

16. Episode most people dislike but I like: Probably Old Dog, New Tricks. Like it's a weird episode, admittedly. But we get some of my favorite things in it. We get Blaine being a sweet and supportive partner, we get Klaine being a team, we get Kurt calling Rachel out on how selfish she is, we get puppies, and we get Peter Pan. It's great. I have fun with that episode.

and now that I have finally finished that, I'm going to tag @esilher, @calsvoid, @lusthurts, @backslashdelta, and @cryscendo

#personal #glee #klaine