#though i think none of us run polls anymore

[berisims]

TAGGED: 15 QUESTIONS

Got tagged by @alpine-lapine and after running a poll on who I should make this about, it turns out ✨Morgyn✨ won with 50% of the votes. Not my OC, but people seem to like them, so I shall deliver!

Questions & answers under the cut:

Are you named after anyone?

No idea. My mother never bothered to tell me.

When was the last time you cried?

I'm not sure. I haven't shed a tear in a long while. Though if I had to guess, I'd say the time I was told about Tess' disappearence probably being tied to her potential death was the last time I truly cried.

Do you have kids?

Not at the moment. Though Minerva keeps telling me how she has visions of me holding two curly haired children who look suspiciously like me and...an acquaintance. I'm still trying to wrap my head around that.

Do you use sarcasm?

Oh I live for sarcasm. To be fair, I think it's a Sage thing. *Snicker* Yeah, I'd say it comes with the job.

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Their eyes. Not in the superficial "you've pretty eyes" manner, but in the "I now know your every secret" kinda way. You can learn so much about a person just by looking them in the eyes. You can find out if they're excited, scared, maybe intimidated by your presence. Some are subtle and others not so much. It's quite interesting, honestly. And telling of a person. Which is why I often use sunglasses when going out... Yes, even at nightime...I do the eye reading thing, not them.

What’s your eye colour?

Green, unfortunately. Most people think it's a lovely color, but to me it only serves as a reminder that I actually have a father who never bothered to make an appearance in my life. I'd much rather have my mother's brown even if our relationship is rocky.

Scary movies or happy endings?

I find happy endings to be cliché and far too boring these days. Bring in the horror. I'm all for it. I just won't guarantee it'll do a good job of scaring me.

Any special talents?

I can light things on fire and put them out with a simple flick of my wrist, but I suppose this so called "talent" is exclusive to spellcasters alone. If we're talking regular human talents then I'd probably say...acting. My fellow sages can attest to that.

Where were you born?

It's a blur, honestly. I know my mother was originally from Glimmerbrook and that I was raised in Windenburg up until I decided to run away at the age of 16, but I'm unsure if I was actually born there. I always had the idea that we simply moved shortly after my birth as a means to chase after my bastard father. But again, this is not something that I know for certain.

What are your hobbies?

There are a ton of things I enjoy doing, none of which I consider to be a hobby aside from reading, maybe. I don't have that much free time away from the Magic Realm, anyways. Simeon has been trying to get me into gardening though, but I don't think it's for me. After all, it's not like I can grow plants out of thin air like he can. He's the expert in Practical Magic, not me...and I wouldn't be caught dead digging through dirt and soil with my own bare hands.

Have you any pets?

I do. A 2 year old Dobermann. His name is Asmodeus. 

What sports do you play/ have played?

I'm honestly not that much of a sports person anymore, but I used to do gymnastics as a kid. And it's fortunate that I did, because all that trained flexibility still comes in handy sometimes. *L. Faba snorts in the distance* L. take your mind out of the gutter, that's not what I meant.

How tall are you?

Around 5'7.

Favourite subject in school?

My memories of school are brief and muddled, but I remember I used to love biology. And physics. The irony of it all baffles me to this day.

Dream job?

I've never given it much thought, especially after dropping out before I could even finish high school. Years later, the..."oportunity" to become a Sage made itself known and I took it. It wasn't like I had much of a choice in the matter, with me being the one apprentice Tess left before she went missing. I was obviously still in training when that happened, but the Realm desperately needed a new Sage of Untamed Magic and so I had to rise up to the occasion and take the position for myself. At first, I was resentful and felt that becoming a sage was the equivalent of becoming a prisoner of the Realm. But I soon realized this wasn't the case and eventually grew to love what I currently do. There is so much more to being a Sage than just holding the Magic Realm in place. Today I can confidently say that this is, in fact, my dream job.

---//---

None of you has to do this if you're not feeling up to it, but just in case you are, I'm tagging @starlightthing , @trappedwell , @samssims and @edyavtostopom . The original template is in english, but if any of you feels more comfortable doing this in a different language, then go for it! Your blog, your rules!

#the sims 4 #ts4 #realm of magic #morgyn ember #beri plays tag with words #the way I just pulled their dog out of my a- #I thought about giving them a cat first but I was like #no we're going down the canine route this time #and it's gotta match their personality to a certain degree #and so asmodeus was born #he's intimidating and elegant much like his owner #bork bork bjork

[green-blue-heller]

I still don’t know what I think of all of this.

Or him.

I feel like if he is actually straight, rather than running back into the closet for whatever reason (it’s hard to believe so many people’s gaydar is broken though), then he has spent over a decade pantomiming queerness.

Then it was all a performance.

And if that’s true, then it brings up sooo many more questions.

Almost too many questions.

Questions I don’t think I want the answers to.

I’ve spent a lot of time saying they don’t owe us anything.

But this feels different.

Because if Misha isn’t queer, I feel like we were the butt of his joke for a decade.

Because I 💯 believe, with my whole being, that he went out on that stage with a plan to somehow insinuate he was bisexual.

Because literally no one was talking about bisexuality (or any sexuality) until he brought it up. And so that’s what is confusing (or one of the things that is confusing). Because in his retraction he said he was trying to avoid talking about his sexuality.

My guy, if you don’t want to talk about your sexuality, then you have no business polling your audience to ask who is bisexual.

You didn’t ask who was gay. Or ace. Or even just queer.

You singled out bisexuals.

I really want to know what his end game was going to be before Jai said, “Misha, you didn’t raise your hand for any of them.”

And please note, this is in no way their fault.

Misha is a grown ass 47 year old man who has over a decade of experience dealing with fans and their questions. And has hand waved questions before and not answered them.

No one forced Misha to say he was all three.

Shit.

I’m cycling back to angry and confused again.

I’m just… I’m tired.

Being a Supernatural fan is exhausting.

Being in this fandom is a lot.

But all I know is that Misha broke something.

And I don’t know if I can ever get that back. (I’m refraining from we because I know everyone isn’t having this same experience, though I know a lot of you are, to some degree.)

I just know this sucks. For everyone.

And I wish there were answers.

Because honestly, that post he made, provided none.

But one thing is for certain, since he stated that he is straight, he doesn’t get to make gay jokes anymore.

Because they were wink wink nudge nudge funny when it was assumed he was one of us.

But since he decided to publicly announce he isn’t, then it’s no longer cute and funny. Instead, it just makes him look like an asshole who is turning queerness into a joke.

And honestly, we have enough people turning queerness, bisexuality specifically, into a joke.

But the one thing I do know for sure, is that everyone is allowed to feel the way they feel. And no one has the right to tell anyone else how they should feel or process that.

Especially for queer fans who feel hurt or betrayed by Misha. Because if you’re not queer, this ain’t about you.

#misha collins #The Great New Jersey Bisexual Conundrum of 2022

[jinmukangwrites]

Day 5 (6-17): Aged-up | Mother and son | Brothers

Warnings: near death experiences, drowning, canon typical violence, kidnapping

Note: I felt like I've written a lot of Dick and Damian bonding this week... So I'm switching it out with Jason. I had other things I wanted to write for this prompt, but it got too late at night to write something long. Enjoy this short, hurt/comfort Jason and Damian bonding instead <3

-o-o-o-o-

Damian's only been captured for a few hours... and already he feels more miserable than he has in a long time.

None other than the Penguin stands before him, sneering cheek to cheek as his associates finish tying the knots around chest and the damp wooden pole his back leans against. The sand underneath him is rocky and sharp; he can already feel the curious laps of the returning tide against his tailbone. His hands are restrained behind the pole as well, while his legs are tied by his ankles. He's sitting, and stuck sitting thanks to the rope around his chest.

His head aches, which isn't very surprising considering the thing that got him in this situation was a well placed hit to his skull via a brick.

He didn't mean to get caught. He simply wanted to blow off some steam after getting fed up with Jason while on patrol. Of all people to be paired up with, it had to be Jason. It couldn't have been someone Damian gets along with like Richard, Duke, or Cassandra. It couldn't have been Timothy where they at least know when boundaries are being pushed with their banter. It couldn't have even been Stephanie, where she's at least funny.

No, the entire family was there, and Damian got paired with the one he doesn't know how to deal with. He got annoyed by the constant, demeaning tone Jason would use on him, and after one too many backhanded insults that only Jason found funny, Damian snapped. He doesn't even remember what exactly was said, he just knows he yelled at Jason to go on without him, and Jason didn't stop him when he turned the other direction.

Thinking back on it, Damian probably insulted him back, and the reason he let Damian go was because he was just as annoyed as Damian was.

It doesn't matter now. What matters is that he didn't intend to stumble upon the Penguin and his goons in some warehouse by the coast. He was just going to take down a few classic muggers or something of similar nature and go back to Jason and act like the argument never happened.

He intended to go back and tell his father about the Penguin's actions, but he didn't notice a pigeon until he almost stepped on it. Startled, it flew up at his face and he fell backwards right through the already broken skylight. He barely managed to slow his fall with his grappling gun, but he still hit the ground pretty hard. Hurt and surprised, he didn't have time to even stand up before the brick was smashed against his skull.

And now he's here, under Gotham's docks, being tied to a poll while the Penguin laughs to himself.

"I'll just let the tide kill you for me," he says to himself, yet his idiot goons still cackle. Damian glares at them, but they only laugh harder, sending down their own insults until the ocean water begins to pool up to Damians toes.

The Penguin makes a remark that it's time to go, and that he doesn't want to get his new dress shoes messy, and then they're gone, leaving Damian to attempt to tug on the ropes holding him against the pole. He tries to reach for the small blades he keeps in the compartments of his gloves, but his fingers come away empty. Curse Gotham's Rogues and their ability to actually use their brains and disarm their captives when they get their hands on them.

He strains harder on the ropes now, twisting and trying to reach any knots with his fingers, but all he succeeds in doing is cutting off the circulation to his hands and pressing the rope into his chest.

He relaxes with a frustrated huff and glares at the water that's already risen a few inches to ripple close to his hips. He knows that not long from now, the water will be above his head.

For now, it's freezing, and once it reaches his fingers, escape will become all the more impossible thanks to numbing appendages.

He tugs on the ropes, then tugs some more, and he keeps going until he has to stop and let the blood come back to his fingers.

The water continues to rise, seeping through his suit and into his bones, rising to his fingers, then his arms, then his shoulders... It's when it finally touches his chin when the despair and terror finally settles.

He can't get out. He can't get out. The ropes feel no more loose than what they were when he began trying to undo them, and his fingers are so numb now they must be turning blue under his gloves. His jaw aches from his chattering teeth, and his nose is beginning to run.

He pulls desperately on his bonds now, his attempts to escape becoming more and more reckless the longer he sits here. He's hyper-aware of the movement of the water around him, and his panic is making it difficult to breathe.

Through his terror, he hears something. The motor of a bike. He hears the engine cut out nearby. He can probably shout for help.

It's his last hope. He can only pray that whoever came to the docks at this hour of night, that they are friendly. He opens his mouth to yell for assistance, but he chokes when sea water enters his mouth. He scrambles his bound feet against the rocky sand, attempting to lift himself up the pole just a little higher, but he doesn't go anywhere. The ropes are too tight.

He's not sure if the water near his eyes is from him flailing in the water, or if it's because of frightened tears. Either way, he can feel the water tickling his nose, and he only has a split second to suck in one last breath of air before the water rises above any means to breath.

"Robin?" A deep voice shouts, and Damian could sob at the irony of it. "You here?"

Someone came looking for him, but they don't know where he is. He's going to drown under the feet of someone who could have saved him if they had come just minutes before.

The water rises over his head now, and he can no longer hear anything besides the racing of his heart. He can't feel his fingers or toes anymore, and he's sure he will drown with bruises under the ropes on his chest.

He's going to drown. He's going to die. His lungs hurt, already his oxygen is running out. He's panicking and it's cold and he's going to die-

He doesn't know how much longer he holds his breath, only that eventually, his mouth opens against his will and sucks in water that may as well be fire going into his lungs.

Black creeps into his vision... and with the last sight of dark bubbles erupting around him, he loses consciousness.

-o-o-o-o-

He wakes up vomiting. A strong hand wraps around his arm and holds him on his side so he can empty his lungs and stomach of salty sea water. It feels like his insides are being torn apart, but eventually it calms down a little so he can finally suck in a gasp of air.

The hand on his arm becomes two, snaking around his shoulder blades to sit him up and squeeze him against a broad chest.

"Holy shit," a familiar voice gasps, "Jesus fuck."

"J'son..." Damian murmurs, trying to make sense of what's going on. His throat feels abused, and his head pounds like drums. He's so tired, his eyes begin to drop.

"Nah don't you fucking think of it," Jason growls, pulling him away from his chest and giving him a hard shake. Damian blinks, trying to focus. Jason brings a hand up and brushes his dripping hair from his face.

Then, it all comes back to him. The tide... The water... He was drowning...

He thought he died.

But here he is, untied from the pole and on the docks, looking at Jason's bare and dripping face with his helmet castaway on the ground. He must have given him mouth-to-mouth... And his chest aches like he's taken a beating. Must be the combined bruises of the ropes and from chest compressions.

He's suddenly overwhelmed with emotions, all of his fear slamming right into him.

"You came," he croaks, not sure if it's because of his abused respiratory system or if it's because of his rekindled tears.

Jason's face twists, then he pulls Damian back in to squeeze him tightly once again. The hug is a surprise, and it hurts, but Damian doesn't fight it. He's too relieved and scared and confused and ashamed to fight it.

"When you didn't answer the comms, I thought you were still mad," Jason explains. The rumble of his voice in his chest against Damian's cheek is oddly relaxing. "But then it started getting late and I didn't feel right, so I asked Babs for your coords and- fuck- I thought I got you killed."

"How did you know...?" Damian asks, not willing to go further into the sentence and endure the pain of his throat.

Jason gives a laugh, and it's almost hysterical. "A lucky guess? I don't know, I guess it's just habit to look in the water when something goes wrong at the docks." There's a pause. Then Jason releases Damian once again. "I'm sorry. I said some things I shouldn't have. This wouldn't have happened if I kept my cool."

Damian shakes his head. It doesn't matter now. "You came."

Jason's lips twitch. "Of course I did. We're... Brothers. Even if we don't get along all the time, I still don't want anyone beating you up other than me."

Damian let's out a laugh, though it dissolves into a fit of coughs. Jason rubs his back during all of it, then once he calms down he helps him to his feet.

"C'mon," he says, "let's get you back home so Alfred can check on you. The sooner we get back, the sooner I can get getting yelled at out of the way for letting you go off on your own."

He helps Damian up to his feet, and Damian gratefully clutches to his jacket to steady himself. "I am to blame too. Once we tell father you helped save me, he will be less angry."

Jason snorts. "You think I'm worried about the old man? It's Dick I'm worried about."

"Ah," Damian grins, all the fear finally ebbing out from his system. "I'm afraid I cannot help you there."

Jason helps Damian onto the bike and returns his helmet so it's over his head. He holds Damian in front of him with one arm securely around his chest as he drives. He feels safe nestled against Jason like this. It's strong and unyielding. His relationship with the older man has always been strange, considering they weren't always on the same sides when Richard was Batman.

But this? This is safe. It's warm. Is careful and gentle. Normally he'd be embarrassed to be so vulnerable like this near Jason, but like Jason said... They're brothers.

He cannot help but feel a little disappointed once they finally make it back to the cave. Yet it seems he's misjudged Jason once again, because after he was rushed to the med-bay and Jason got an earful from Richard... he fell asleep and awoke the next morning with Jason still there.

Things may not be perfect with Jason, and they argue a lot, but Damians sure things have a chance of becoming better.

They're brothers, after all.

#damianwayneweek2021 #damian wayne #Robin #jason todd #Red Hood #dc comics #fanfiction #jin writes #drowning tw #kidnapping tw

[sarahjtv]

BNHA Chapter 320 Short Spoiler Analysis: The Power of Friendship

The battle between Deku Vs. Class A has begun!  Well, it’s technically a battle, but more so a “Catch-A-Deku” situation.  Everyone is trying to use their cool Super Moves and words of friendship to try to convince Deku to come back home.  They’re all reminding him all of times he helped them, so they’re trying to return the favor.  So far, I think half the class was featured here including Shoto who I thought would be saved til the end.  Maybe he will be featured again since he’s one of Deku’s closest friends.  What’s interesting is that the trio that was shown at the end of last week’s chapter, Bakugo, Ochako, and Iida, didn’t have their heart-to-hearts with Deku this week, so I bet you they’re being saved for the end.  Anyway, my left hand is still on the mend, so I’ll keep this one short this week.  I hope it heals soon.

The 2nd Color page is shown this week!  It’s of Froppy this time around!  I think it’s been a while since we’ve seen Froppy featured in a color page, so this is cool to see.  She looks really good here too.  Horikoshi’s art rarely disappoints.  Next week is going to be the 7th BNHA Anniversary color page and the 7th Popularity Poll announcement, so I’m excited for that.  Apparently we’re going to get a lot of BNHA things next week including things for the WHM movie, Team-Up Missions, and the WHM one-shot manga.

I love how at the beginning, Bakugo breaks the 4th wall here by commenting on how Deku’s “art style” underwent a complete change.  It’s both a good taunt on Bakugo’s part and some acknowledgment from Horikoshi-sensei on the change of Deku’s design in general since this arc began.

So, Bakugo did tell the rest of 1-A about Deku’s other Quirks which is good.  I thought that would be the case after remembering that Bakugo read All Might’s OFA archive book.  Bakugo would still look over the other Holder’s Quirks, so he would have knowledge on the 4th-6ths Holders.  Problem is that none of them know of the 2nd and 3rd’s Quirks, so dealing with Fa-Jin will be troublesome.  None of us know what the 2nd’s Quirk is yet though, but I have a feeling we’ll see it in this battle.

Quite a few new Super Moves debut in this chapter!  

Katsuki Bakugo: Shockwave Landmine: Looks like Bakugo creates a blast on the ground so that the blast blows away anything around it like Deku’s Smokescreen.  It’s a big blast too, so Bakugo’s got a lot of range with this thing.

Kiyoka Jiro: Heartbeat Wall: It’s hard to tell, but I think it’s a move where Jiro uses her sound waves to block or stop whatever comes her way.  It could be really effective to stop anyone who can hear I’m sure.

Fumikage Tokoyami: Ragnorok: “Womb”: It’s a like a capturing move that traps anyone within Dark Shadow.  It kind of looks like one of the moves Tokoyami uses in The Strongest Hero Game.  Unless someone has a light Quirk, I can see this move being very effective in capturing villains.

Really, everyone is doing their best to remind Deku of all the good times they had with them. They’re using the power of feels and friendship to bring their sacrificial idiot home.  I like to believe it’s working given how Deku is finally shown crying tears of sadness as he pushes his friends away.  God, please let this kid have a good cry.  How they’ll be able to catch Deku though I still have no idea.

Deku is able to overpower pretty much everyone this chapter.  Even Tokoyami, who is considered one of the strongest in the class, and Momo who created this insanely complex machine to try to put Deku to sleep (how the hell did she make that anyway???).  At the end he’s captured by Shoto’s Heaven-Piercing Ice Wall (which he’s standing on btw and looks so damn pretty 💙☺️), but I doubt that will last.  Deku’s probably going to break right through the ice next chapter.

Speaking of Shoto, since I’m such a simp for him 😔, he has the least amount of dialogue out of everyone having heart-to-hearts with Deku.  But what he says is significant: he basically asks Deku if he can still truly cry and for Deku to share the responsibility with his friends.  I think this is calling back to when Shoto reassured Deku that heroes are allowed to cry back in the Overhaul arc and when Deku meddled with Shoto’s life to save him.  Which is essentially the philosophy everyone’s running on.  Meddling in Deku’s mission is the only way to save him now.

Side note, but I love that Kaminari is the one to tell Deku to take a freaking bath 😂!  Like, we’ve all been telling Deku that, but it’s good to know that Horikoshi and his characters are thinking the same thing.  Now someone has to tell Deku to eat a good meal and take a long nap.  

Also, small detail, but Sato comes in at one point and reminds Deku that they won’t be able to make candied apples for Eri anymore if Deku doesn’t come back.  Deku tells Sato that Eri will be fine without him 😭.  No, Deku, you dumbass!  Eri needs her big bro in her life!  I can’t imagine how sad she must be if she already knows about Deku’s disappearance 😭❤️

I’m also glad to see pretty much every student get some kind of spotlight especially the ones who are more minor characters than the others.  Koda actually gets a mini-monoluge this chapter.  Also, Froppy’s got a lot of focus at the end along with the color page this chapter.  Which, I’m glad to see.  It’s been a long time since Tsuyu got some spotlight.  Really, all the girls need more spotlight.  I assume everyone else will get their shine the next few chapters.  

It’s small and I’m still trying to find the meaning of it, but there’s one panel after Deku escapes from Tokoyami showing him flying through the air in the background and you can see the All Might statue at the forefront.  I want to say this symbolizes Deku being All Might’s successor or something, but I’m not sure.  This one just stood out to me for some reason.  

But yeah, like I said, the last half of the class will probably be featured next chapter.  I think Bakugo will be the last person to talk to Deku since he’s the most important one here.  Remember: Bakugo knows Deku better than anyone.  He will be the turning point I��m positive.  Iida and Ochako will definitely have an impact on Deku, but Bakugo will truly HIT DIFFERENT!  I won’t be surprised if that last conversation leads up to Deku Vs. Kacchan Part 3.  I wouldn’t be mad if that will happen tbh.  Part 2 was about understanding Bakugo and letting his feelings out.  Part 3 could be Deku’s turn.  And of course you gotta have a trilogy to cap it off.  I’m really excited to see what happens next!

Me seeing all my adopted children come together to save my green broccoli boy 💚🥦:

#My Hero Academia Spoilers #Boku No Hero Academia Spoilers #MHA Spoilers #BNHA Spoilers #BNHA 320 #MHA 320 #Chapter 320 #Izuku Midoriya #Deku #Katsuki Bakugo #great explosion murder god dynamight #Dynamight #Shoto Todoroki #Shouto Todoroki #Koji Koda #Kiyoka Jiro #Momo Yaoyorozu #Denki Kamanari #tokoyami fukimage #Tsuyu Asui #Froppy #Eri #bring deku home #bring my son home #also where the hell is Aizawa #he better come back soon #this whole chapter's art was amazing btw #I can't wait till next week #my body is ready #but my feels aren't

[palukoo]

ooh amy and toby because i would die for them

okay i know you sent others before this one but i really wanna answer this one! i meant to just... write about basically what i've said before with their unique combinations of idealism and cynicism but also with the vast difference in loyalty and also their similar political positions, but then i spent all afternoon uh. writing this.

amy and toby meet on some doomed campaign that he's running, and she's fundraising for, and they both know it's doomed but that doesn't stop them from trying. she tells him it is, at some point, and he knows she's right but won't say it, because it's different. amy's consulting for a dozen campaigns this election cycle, and toby's got one, and he likes amy, but she doesn't get to say that about his one.

they bring amy in for debate prep, at the candidate's request, and toby sits back and smiles a little at the hopefully-but-doubfully future senator's comprehensive answer until amy starts eviscerating the woman's answers. she does it with an awkward, regretful smile, and the candidate adjusts, and toby asks amy to step out into the hall, asks if she has a problem with their policies. amy says no, she loves their policies and that's why she's doing what she can to give them a shot. toby laughs bitterly.

"you said yourself that we don't have a shot! we're trying to talk about issues and you're taking the only place we can do that and have people listen and turning it into pithy soundbites like every other guy!"

"the pithy soundbites might stick," she says, mostly unfazed. "let me try to give you a shot. she thinks she has a shot."

he sighs. "yeah."

the candidate loses, 41-57. before amy had started working with them more, polls were at 30-62.

*

they run into each other, after that, both of them with tendencies towards certain candidates. amy's associated with more winning campaigns than toby is by a long shot, but she's never run one, winning or otherwise.

amy's talking to a candidate she's excited about for maryland's fifth district, who's leading against the old, far too moderate and out of touch incumbent in her primaries. andy wyatt. and then toby's beside her.

"oh, hey, amy, this is toby, he's my--"

"you're working with her?" amy asks teasingly before andy can finish. "but she might actually win."

toby laughs. "yeah, no, don't worry, i haven't lost my touch yet. i'm her fiancé, not her campaign manager."

amy tries to keep the surprise from her face. "you two know each other?" andy asks.

"we've worked together before. congratulations, by the way," amy says. toby smiles awkwardly. "don't let him anywhere near your campaign," she teases.

"don't let her anywhere near your speeches," he quips back. amy laughs.

*

it's catching up and some unofficial consulting in the primaries that amy would really rather stay mostly out of even though she has a clear favorite. she meets abbey and liz at a starbucks that was a little diner the last time she was in town, and they bring her back to "campaign headquarters" after bribing her with coffee and using their trademarked bartlet charm. which is really what will help him more than anything, at this point.

she laughs when she gets to the office and sees him bouncing a ball against the wall. "toby ziegler. i should've guessed that you'd be on this campaign."

he doesn't question her presence, just sighs. "because it's doomed?"

she beams at him, shaking her head. "because it's good."

his lips twitch into something resembling a smile, and she turns around to abbey and liz.

"with him and governor bartlet--"

"you can call him jed, y'know," abbey says. amy can't, actually.

"well, with the two of them, you're gonna need to find someone less... long winded."

he sighs and glares, and then his brow furrows. "why the hell are you drinking an iced coffee?"

*

she runs into them right after they've won the primary, which means everyone's uncharacteristically excited, meaning josh unthinkingly drags her along to their party, and jed kisses her cheek, and toby, by some miracle, hugs her and cj laughs and hugs her, too.

"you and toby get along?" she asks, surprised. amy shrugs and turns to toby, who also looks deeply noncommittal. cj laughs again.

the giddiness of the room gets to her. "i admire his integrity and his politics," she says, and there it is again, that vague, almost smile, brighter with the new victory.

"when he recruited me for this campaign, he called emily's list 'that women's group with the dumb name'," cj says to her, and amy turns back to him, suddenly far less admiring.

"dumb name. not dumb... mission, dumb name," he defends. she stands down, a little. "so, what have you been up to lately?”

"i'm political director for emily's list," she says, and he opens his mouth and closes it, and cj laughs again.

*

when the general election rolls around in november, amy collects bets from coworkers and friends and really whoever. she can't help but admire that toby only bets on losing candidates, but she also knows it doesn't matter to him. he won the thing that mattered.

*

"did you know?" he asks, tense.

"what?"

"that-- you've known the bartlet's forever. you... did you know?"

amy shakes her head, and forces her face into a neutral expression. "no, i didn't."

"are you--"

"i didn't run his campaign, toby. i voted for him, and i would've done it either way. and i'm not sure i'm in the majority there, and i'm glad he's there, so... i'm not mad."

he laughs bitterly. "you admire my integrity?"

"didn't say i shared it," she says plainly.

"you're not mad none of them told you?" he asks after a moment.

she takes in a breath and nods slightly. "well," she says like a concession. "mostly i'm worried," she admits, and toby nods, too.

"about him or the election?"

amy doesn't answer. she doesn't need to. he knows as well as she does that it's both.

*

"hey, amy, that speech you gave last week," he says when she runs into him in the hall. "did you write it yourself?"

"yeah."

"i could tell," he says, condescending and teasing at once. she rolls her eyes.

"nice job with the president's remarks yesterday," she says back.

"that was sam."

"yeah, i know. i could tell."

*

"i don't want to have this conversation with you," he says, and her eyes narrow.

"okay."

"not 'cause it's you, 'cause you're actually... i just don't want to have this conversation."

"toby, did something happen?"

he shakes his head and looks at the floor. "josh really cares about you."

she scoffs, disbelieving in a couple ways. "got it."

"amy--"

"as much as i agree that josh really can't take care of himself, he really doesn't need your protection from me, if that's what this is."

toby nods, and amy hopes they'll never talk about that again.

*

working with stackhouse reminds her of the old campaigns she's run into toby on, and it almost makes her nostalgic, except for the part where she's still mad at him, because he knew as well as josh did that the marriage incentives were shit. he knew as well as josh did that they could've made a play other than the one that forced her to resign.

still. she knows that if there's anyone as proud of the president's answer on needle exchange as she is, it's toby.

*

sam's campaign really feels like the old days once they’re in it, mishap after mishap, impossible odds, her trying to get funding while toby coaches him on remarks. she feels bad, having talked him into this, knowing he wouldn't win.

toby's used to the loss, she knows, but he's not used to this one. she buys them both drinks and gets on a plane to start her new job.

*

her first day, after the ceremony, after every exhausting, impossible thing, she still finds herself going back to her office. there's an unpleasant banging sound coming from inside when she gets there, and she'd be more concerned were it not for the secret service and her exhaustion.

she steps inside, ready for whatever new prank josh has set up, but instead it's just cj and toby putting her diplomas back up on her wall.

*

it's a week or so before she catches up and remembers to congratulate toby and andy, but neither of them hold it against her.

it's another few weeks before she leaves, and for that, she's sure he does.

*

"rafferty's speech was really good," she says casually. he nods vaguely in agreement. "toby," she says.

"what?"

"i could tell," she says pointedly, and he sighs. "you should've... i like getting women elected, you know."

"i don't need your help," he says confidently. she rolls her eyes.

"your track record--"

"she's not trying to win, amy," he says insistently, and she shrugs.

"neither was the president at first."

he exhales. "the debates have been better than i expected. santos did well."

she shrugs, and he rolls his eyes.

"i could tell, too."

*

she knows it's stupid, but here she is, so. she hits the buzzer.

"hello?" he asks.

"it's amy."

"wh-- why the hell are you here?"

"i'm not associated directly with the white house or the campaign, toby, just let me up."

there's a long pause where he doesn't say anything, but then the door clicks open. he opens his door when she knocks, and she hands him an iced coffee with a grin. "you didn't answer my question," he says.

"i'm... not mad at you," she says. he squints.

"okay."

"i get why everyone else is," she adds.

"okay. you're still not answering."

she sighs. "i thought you'd want to know that."

"i don't care if you're mad at me," he says gruffly, a bit rude.

"okay," she says, unaffected. "i also... don't want to have this conversation with you."

"what?"

"josh really cares about you," she echoes. he laughs humorlessly.

"i think josh wants to kill me right now."

she smiles. "that's another thing we often have in common," she teases.

"what's the first thing?"

she rolls her eyes and doesn't answer.

*

"should you really be calling me?" he asks.

"i know for a fact that both josh and donna call you. plus, congratulations, you're free."

"and you aren't anymore. didn't think you'd take it."

"i didn't, either," she admits.

"what are you calling about?"

"sam said you knew congressman johnson pretty well. i want him to swing with us for a vote."

*

"how are the kids?" she asks, and he smiles, which makes her smile, too.

"good. they're good."

"good. how's andy? do you... are you and cj talking again?"

he nods. "yeah, they're both... you talk to both of them more than you talk to me."

"and when i do, i ask about you," she counters.

"they're good. how're things there? josh, sam, donna?"

she laughs. "you talk to all of them more than you talk to me." she waits for his eyeroll. "they're all good. things are... you know how things are."

"not as much as you do."

"you can guess."

"yeah."

*

"how's teaching?"

he huffs. "college kids can't write."

"you don't think anyone can write."

"i think sam can write. i think will can write, on a rare good day. whoever you guys have is... fine."

"a glowing recommendation. i'll be sure to pass it along," she teases. otto probably would be flattered, really. "what's up?"

"how are your internals looking?"

she laughs. "did josh cut you off?"

he sighs. "maybe."

*

"i have some notes," he says.

"on... what?"

"the book," he says, like it's obvious.

"well, considering that it's been, a, published, and b, selling quite well, i think it's a little late," she says, arrogant and exasperated.

"i agree. you should've sent me the draft first."

she laughs. "content or style?"

"the content's great. you make good points, and it's compelling, and... it's very..." he trails off and sighs, and she takes the compliment. "it's too pithy."

she rolls her eyes. "how's yours coming along? how many pages so far?"

he pauses. "touché."

*

she's just finished a guest lecture when she gets the call, and she's surprised, a little, by the name on caller id. it's been a while. they'd had less to talk about, other than comments on each other's books, since she'd left the white house and started going back to lobbying and fundraising and debate prep between campaigns for old friends. though, when she thinks about it, it could be that last one.

"hey, toby," she answers.

"hey. so, rafferty's running again," he says.

she smiles. she's always liked rafferty. "okay." she thinks about it. "you... want help fundraising?"

he laughs. "amy. she wants to win this time." he pauses. "you should come up to new hampshire with us."

she gets a plane ticket.

#this almost certainly has mistakes bc i just. wrote it but go with it #i wrote nothing about josh and jed getting shot bc toby and amy would not talk about that with each other thank you #same with gaza tbh #asks #answered #claudiasjeancregg #tww #amy gardner #toby ziegler

[gintokisimp]

If you don’t have a Past, you can’t have a Future - Ch. 2 Morning Stories

It’s a normal weekend morning in the Sakata household. Or is it really that normal?

Genre: Fluff, Family, Light Sexual Content

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 2,199

Small fingers wrapped around Gintoki's fingertip. He bent down to examine the toddler under the blankets, but he didn’t recognize it. The child was none of his. Short white hair framed the chubby face and light grey eyes stared up to him. 

Grey eyes?

Who has grey eyes? He had never seen that before, what an unnatural color..

..come to think of it.. Red and Purple aren’t normal colors either. 

The toddler opened it’s teethless mouth and when it laughed, it sounded like birds singing a heavenly melody.  

Crickets chirping disrupted his dream. 

Gintoki opened his eyes fully. He still always tries to sleep as long as possible, but he just wasn't a long sleeper anymore.

Tsukuyo was already working in the kitchen, preparing the family's breakfast. The sound of rattling plates and faint music from downstairs crept into the bedroom.

Gintoki sat up, and looked out of the open window. It was a sunny morning and the fresh air brushed his face, carrying the smell and noises of late summer. It had been a hot summer, but gladly, they were able to afford air conditioning, when the house extension was built. It made the summers so much more endurable. 

The beautiful atmosphere refreshed his thoughts, but the dream didn’t leave his mind. Maybe he was just mixing things up, dreams tend to work like that. 

He scrambled out of the sheets and put on some black jogging pants and a simple grey shirt. Settling down with a family meant he could finally have a bigger variety of clothes. However that works. 

Gintoki slouched through the open door down the stairs to the office living room hybrid and entered the kitchen. It had previously been his bedroom, but now it was the perfect room for a spacious cooking paradise. They really enjoyed cooking together. It was almost like a family ritual, baking all kinds of sweet stuff (mostly strawberry flavored of course) with the kids and eating it downstairs in the cozy bar with the rest of the family.  

She was wearing a fluffy morning robe, her short hair pinned up in a messy ponytail, skin rosy from her morning shower, looking as divine as ever. 

Tsukuyo tiptoed busily through the room, quickly glanced at him and gave him a warm smile. 

That damn bewitching smile.

He fell for that a long time ago, still remembering it clearly. He worshipped it when she looked at him like that, she could kill him with her smile alone. Generally speaking, he worshipped her with his entire existence. 

Gintoki hurriedly closed the gap between them and caught her in her movements, wrapping his arms around her waist. She was emitting a warmth that he loved so much about her.

"Good morning, honey."

Humming to the sound of the music, Gintoki swayed with the rhythm. She sighed in response and leaned into him while she continued to prepare the breakfast. His lips found her neck and she gasped. 

"Could ya wake up the kids?"

Tsukuyo muttered through her lips. 

"mhmh.."

He held her a little bit tighter, pushed her lightly against the counter and faintly rocked against her backside. His mouth hovered over her neck, breathing against it, and he felt a shiver going down her spine.  Jackpot! that always worked to get her in the mood. He laughed quietly before he continued his teasing.

"Could ya.. ya do it.. now?" She stuttered.

"Yea,.. sure." 

Gintoki whispered in a breathy tone and his lips latched onto her neck again, eliciting a surprised sigh from her mouth.

"Gintoki.." She called out weakly. „That’s not what I meant.“ 

His hands left her hip and moved upwards, following her round curves and finally, they rested over her breasts. Tenderly, he started kneading them and dragged his thumb over her already stiffened buds which he could feel through the soft fabric. Tsukuyo moaned softly and closed her eyes.

His lips left her skin and instead, he ran his tongue along her delicate neck and -

"Papi what are you doing?"

Gintoki stopped like a deer hit by the headlights, his eyes wide open, hands on her boobs, tongue on her neck. He looked over to see the twins Ginga and Mizuki standing hand in hand in the doorframe. The hormones really got the best of him that he tried to seduce her so carelessly in broad daylight, but she was also completely obliterated. The new set of lingerie was still ghosting through his mind, that kind of made him go stupid.

Conclusion: It wasn’t his fault. 

"I .. I.. uhm.. I'm helping Mami make breakfast."

"But why are ya licking her f’ that?"

Gintoki let go of Tsukuyo and awkwardly walked over to them and kneeled down in front of them.

"You see, when Mami and Papi love each other, they do things like that while making breakfast. It’s normal, it’s completely normal!" He said in a serious tone. Gintoki thought for a millisecond and added something else. 

"..and Mami likes that." 

A spatula hit him on the back of his head like a deadly weapon and he fell face first to the floor. At least she stopped using Kunais on him a long time ago. She might be worried to lose the father if she continued to pierce his brain with sharp metal. 

"Idiot."

Tsukuyo mocked him and Gintoki lifted his upper body to glare at her. 

"Hey, no violence in front of the kids! Besides that, you could use that for something better than throwing it at me, you could sp-”

Another kitchen utensil hit him and knocked him over again. This time, he stayed on the floor, only inelegantly rolling on his back. 

“Mizuki, Ginga.. could you please visit Granny for a few minutes until the food is ready?”

“Yes!” They chirped in unison and immediately ran out of the room. 

He still was surprised how obedient they were. He didn’t know where they got it from, definitely not from him. Gintoki sat up and looked at Tsukuyo. She was back to her business, her back facing him. That was his chance. He jumped up. 

"They're gone, now let's make it quick. I'm ready." 

Gintoki already fumbled on his pants but Tsukuyo whacked him in the head when he reached her.

"Owww, I already told ya that's the wrong place." 

He held his head and pouted, lookin at her with fake puppy eyes. She didn’t fall for it. 

"Ya still an idiot."

"Can you blame me though? I'm just an ugly man with an absolutely beautiful wife." 

Gintoki grumbled angrily, crossed his arms in front of his chest and leaned against the kitchen counter.

Tsukuyo blushed furiously. Even though they were married for so many years now, she still blushed like a tsundere high school girl and he liked that. It was also fairly easy to achieve that, but she could do that to him just as easily.

"Ya think I'm beautiful?" She asked quietly.

Gintoki's anger evaporated and he looked at her visibly confused.

"uh.. of course? Didn't I say that enough times already? I can say it a few more times if you wanna hear that again."

"I.. I just thought as I'm getting older, I'm.." She suddenly stopped in the middle of her sentence, averting her face from him. 

"You.. ?"

"..forget it"

"You're joking, right? You must be joking. Have you ever looked at yourself?"

“I have and yer just blinded.” She whispered. 

“Blinded by what?! I love  you , not your looks!”

“So you hate how I look?” Her eyes found his, watery, shining.  Fuck. 

“What?? No! That’s not what I meant, you’re beautiful, stunning, gorgeus.. fuck, I’m out of words.”

“..okay.”

“If I do not literally love everything about you, do you think I would be standing here right now? Do you think we had some little brats running around  our home?”

“I - I’m not sure.”

“I’m gonna tattoo that on your arm if you keep questioning my endless love for you!”

"But..also.. we.. we are not really a fan favorite" She shyly crossed her arms in front of her chest and turned away again.

"Wh - What're you talking about?" Gintoki was genuinely confused now.  Fan favorite?

"The polls are always full of pairings with you.. and.. I .. only reached 11th place"

Gintoki understood. He never gave a single fuck about any of those rankings, expect the offical character popularity polls, where he always ends up first. That was important as a protagonist. But everything else? Trivial. 

"You reached 11th place? We reached 11th place and it doesn't matter as long as I can be by your side."

She tensed up a little.

"I don't give a single fuck about any fan polls. Our pairing can end up in the last place, but in the end, I won you. I couldn't ask for more"

Gintoki pulled her in his arms and she gasped in surprise. 

"You're my goddess, Tsukki. My literal moon goddess."

"Stop." Tsukuyo frowned.

"You're my moon in the darkest night. Always shining on my path."

“Stop.” She whispered, blushing slightly. 

“With you, I never have to walk alone.”

Tsukuyo hit him weakly. 

“I worship you, I pray to you every day and I still hope that one day the goddess will step down from the heavens and never leave my side.”

She giggled. 

“I’m already here you idiot.”

“Tsukuyo, I don’t know what’s wrong today, but I hope I can make your day better.”

"Save that sweet talk for the bedroom." She laughed in her sweetest voice and pushed him away. 

"Now go and get the kids back, why did you even send them downstairs?"

"You know exactly why." Gintoki said suggestively.  

“Now gimme a kiss.”

He pulled her back in his arms and covered her lips with his, his hands started to roam over her back, resting on her bottom. Tsukuyo smiled and slightly leaned back to escape his desires. 

"But you still have another child" She whispered and Gintoki’s eyes flung open. He let go of her, caught red handed for the second time today. Tsukuyo pointed behind him with a smile and Gintoki turned around. 

Tsukishiro stood in the middle of the neighboring room and looked over to them, uninterested, exploring the depths of his nose. He was already neatly dressed in the white haori with the blue swirls. It was way too long for him, but he refused to get it shortened. 

He was an early bird and always reasonable and tidy. That was one of the things he got from Tsukuyo. He was like the perfect mix, but at the same time, he was not. 

Reluctantly, Gintoki let go of his wife and sighed. 

“Fine, we will do it later,.. promise?”

“Promise.” 

She held out her pinky and Gintoki hooked it with his own pinky. It only added to the crackling tension between and he quickly retreated. Tsukuyo gave him another smile and he turned around to meet his son in the living room. 

“Morning Kishi.” 

Gintoki patted the boy's fluffy hair and he kneeled down to get to his level. 

"Did you hear what I said to her?" He whispered into the child's ear. 

"Of course, I'm not deaf." He bluntly replied. 

Gintoki paused, he felt his face heating up. 

Don’t get embarrassed in front of your kids, what are you, a lousy virgin?!

..wait -

What are you, a lousy single father who mourns over his late wife and tries to get approval from his kids to date another woman?

"Don't loose a word over it."

“I never planned to.”

“Good.”

Such a good boy.

"Now, would you help your mother with the table? I'll be back in a few minutes"

"Sure.”

Tsukishiro lazily made his way over to Tsukuyo ,  hugging her waist tightly. Tsukuyo hummed and caressed his silver locks lovingly without averting her attention from her current task. 

Aw so cute..

Gintoki could melt on the spot. 

The boy suddenly turned his head and glared angrily at Gintoki, his eyes glowing.

If you don’t treat her right, don’t you dare to come close to her. 

Gintoki was dumbfounded for a second. He blinked and everything was back to normal. It was probably just his mind playing some tricks on him. He stumbled to the front door and slipped in his shoes. 

The morning sun on his skin was warm. He knew he would be sweating a lot today. He hated to sweat on his free days. 

Gintoki entered the bar. The twins sat on two chairs, all their attention directed at Otose, who was holding up a DVD. They were listening with wide eyes until they noticed their father entering the establishment. 

“Papi, Granny told us a story about you! A new one!” Mizuki screamed happily and waved at the old woman. 

"Ah good morning Gintoki, I didn't know you were such a philanderer once." She laughed roughly and waved the DVD in her hands.

Philanderer? When..?

"Oi, what's that?" He asked while coming closer. Otose turned the object in her hands and held it in his direction. 

Gintoki looked at the cover and went pale.

"Where.. where did you get that..?"

#gintama #gintsu #fanfic #gintoki x tsukuyo #gintsu fanfiction

[five-rivers]

Darkness/Poison

This is part of the ‘Doorways’ series (aka Danny is an eldritch abomination and Jack and Maddie have no normal friends so they decide to go on a road trip to make sure none of their friends from college have become semi-satanic soul-eating holes in reality AU).  

AO3 link to series.

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.

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The Fenton Ghost Assault Vehicle did not have the smoothest ride in the world, but Danny was used to it.  Also, he had driven the Specter Speeder through the Carnivorous Canyon and ridden in Johnny 13’s sidecar.

Point being, if his parents didn’t want him to fall asleep, they should have told him.  Or, at least, not dragged him out of bed at four thirty in the morning (both to get an early start and to avoid the reporters and other undesirables who had taken to circling Fentonworks like vultures).

Look.  Danny might have been an unspeakable eldritch horror, a superhero, and one of the richest human beings on the face of the Earth, but he was also a teenager.  Not to mention sleep deprived.  

Besides, Mom and Dad had said their next Paranormal Research Club friend was miles and miles away.  They wouldn’t reach his town until much later in the day.  Danny had plenty of time to sleep safely.  

Which is why he was so disgruntled when Dad shook him awake with a cheery “We’re here!”

“Where’s here?” asked Danny, rubbing his eyes and noting sadly how far away his portal back in Amity Park was.  

“Breakfast,” said Jazz, voice heavy with sleep.  Apparently, he wasn’t the only one trying to take advantage.  

“’Kay,” said Danny, briefly wrestling with the seatbelt.  He caught Mom staring as he opened the door.  “What?” he asked frowning.  

“Nothing,” she said, unconvincingly.

Whatever.  Danny could figure it out later, when he was more awake.  He jumped to the ground.  

“I think you guys will really like it here!” said Dad, waving at the building.  “The food’s great!  An old friend owns the place.  Your mom and I used to come here all the time before you were born, when we were commuting between Amity and Chicago.”

Danny nodded along, staring up at the neon sign that read ‘Red Flower Dinner.’  Then his brain caught up, and he slowly turned his head to look at Dad.  

“’Old friend,’” he said.  “What do you mean old friend?”

Dad blinked at him, uncomprehending.  Jazz came to his rescue.  

“Dad, we’re doing this whole trip because all of your old friends are lunatics,” she explained.  

“They’re not!” said Dad, defensively.  “Besides, Marianne was never part of our club.  She didn’t even go to U of M.”

“She was a waitress at our favorite hangout,” explained Mom.  “She got enough saved to buy this restaurant around the time we graduated.  She’s few years older than us.”

“Saved?  I thought a relative died, and she got an inheritance?” asked Dad.

Danny groaned.  “Do you not see how suspicious that is?”

“Come on, Danno!  We can have normal friends.”

“No, you can’t.  If a normal thing ever interacts with our family in any way, it immediately becomes abnormal simply because of how unlikely it is for anything like that to happen.”  He dug the heels of his hands into his eyes until he saw stars.  

“He’s got a point,” said Jazz.  “Maybe we could go to a different dinner?”

“But,” said Dad, “she makes the best breakfast. And she really is normal.  She wasn’t involved in any ghost stuff.”

“Are you really telling me you never talked to her about ghost stuff at all?” asked Danny, suspiciously.  

“Well, we did,” said Dad.  “But we talk to everyone about ghost stuff.”  

“Dad…”

Dad inhaled and heaved a huge sigh, shoulders sagging.  “Alright, Danno.  I get what you’re saying.  We can go somewhere else…  Even if it won’t be as good.”

Okay.  Now Danny felt bad.  

Unfair.  

“Well,” he said.  “I guess we could check and make sure she’s not, you know, haunted or anything.  That’s why we’re doing this, I guess.”

Dad brightened immediately, and Danny had to grab the back of his shirt to keep him from running in.  

“But remember, if I say we have to go, we have to go.  That’s the deal.”

Dad nodded.  Danny let go.   He sighed as Dad disappeared into the building.  

“Is the food really that good?” asked Danny.

“Marianne grows a lot of her own herbs,” offered Mom with a shrug.  “Everything she makes is at least decent.  But, well,” she grimaced as she held the door open for her children. “The reason we liked her so much was that she always seemed interested in our research.  We liked talking to someone who took us seriously.”

“Wonderful,” deadpanned Jazz.

The décor inside the dinner was bright red and floral.  The seats and benches were upholstered in shiny, dyed leather.  A long glass counter displayed pies and other desserts under bright lights.  The air was warm and smelled faintly of cherries.  A radio station played quietly in the background, blurring the chatter of the other guests.  

Danny rubbed his eyes again.  Ugh.  He was tired. Sleeping in a moving vehicle was a special kind of unrestful.  Heh. Unrestful dead.  More like unrested dead.  That was him.  

(Someday, he was going to track down the first person to say, ‘I’ll sleep when I’m dead,’ and give them a stern talking to.)

“Marianne!” boomed Dad, waving at someone in the kitchen behind the order window.

There was a gasp.  “Jack Fenton!  Is that you?” A woman with greying brown curls leaned out, then ducked away briefly before reappearing through a door.  “I haven’t seen you in years!”  She threw her arms out, hugging first Dad and then Mom.

Danny bristled at the perceived threat to his parents but managed to control himself.  This was nothing.  Everything was fine.  Just because every one of his parents’ friends so far had something weird and potentially fatal going on so far, it didn’t give him the right to police their every interaction with other human beings.  

“Are these your kids?” asked Marianne, excitedly. “Oh, my goodness, you must be Jazz, and you’re Danny?  I’ve only seen you in pictures, but you’ve grown so much.  You’ll be as tall as your dad in no time.”

“Hope so,” said Danny, knowing there was no chance of that happening whatsoever.

Not with his human body, anyway.  

“I hope we’ll get a chance to talk,” she continued, “but I have things on the stove.  Why don’t you go ahead and find a seat?  We’ll get to you soon.”

“Looking forward to it, Marianne!” said Dad, waving again.  

“Is she alright?” asked Mom quietly as they slid into a corner booth.  

Danny wound up in between Mom and Jazz, which was good, because Dad tended to elbow whoever he was sitting by.  In this case, Mom, who could take it.

“I think so?” He rubbed his eyes.  “But I can’t just sense everything. Don’t forget that.”

“Stop rubbing your eyes,” said Mom.  

“They’re itchy,” said Danny.  “I think I got some sleep sand in them or something.”

Mom’s expression softened.  Danny blinked at it and wondered when he’d gotten so used to seeing an edge of suspicion on her face.  

“It could be allergies,” she said.  “It’s that time of year.  Or it could be that you keep rubbing them.”  She tugged his hands away from his face.  “Either way, it isn’t healthy to keep touching your eyes, sweetie.”

It wasn’t that she didn’t have a point, but Danny wasn’t entirely sure he could get sick.  Not anymore.  Maybe if he was far enough away from Amity Park, spread thin enough between his two major physical manifestations…  If his body was human enough…  Maybe figuring that out could be a fun family bonding experience.  Not.  

He yawned.  He wanted to go back to sleep.  Being in here, with the warm scented air and not-quite-white background noise, only made slumber more inviting.  

Still.  His family’s ability to protect themselves was lacking.  Danny at least had to stay conscious in case Marianne decided to channel the spirit of Locusta or something.  Ancients, wouldn’t that be typical?  

A waiter came, introduced themself, and handed out menus.  Danny failed to process most of the waiter’s prepared speech, and his eyes drifted down to the menu.  

It seemed… normal, for lack of a better word. Slightly worn, a couple stains on the paper behind the plastic protector.  The pages had a border of blotchy red flowers.  The items were all typical breakfast foods.  Nothing jumped out at him.  

He wasn’t even hungry.  Actually, if he thought about it, he was a little nauseated. Sometimes that happened when he didn’t eat for a while, though, so maybe he was hungry, after all?

Why did bodies have to be so complicated?

“What are you getting?” asked Jazz, who was morally unable to make a food order until she’d taken a poll.  

“I don’t know,” said Danny, folding his arms on the table and letting his head rest on them.  “I’ll probably just get whatever you’re getting.”

Jazz frowned at him and repeated the question to their parents.

The waiter came back after a few minutes.  

“I’ll have the Variety Breakfast!” said Dad, excitedly.  

“The number five, please,” said Maddie. “Sausage links, not bacon.”

“Um,” said Jazz.  “How about the Red Flower Special?”

“Excellent choice,” said the waiter, smiling. “Marianne grows all the seasonings for that herself, and the presentation is lovely.”

“I mean, it’s pancakes, right?” asked Jazz, nervously.  

“It is, it is.  What would you like for your side?”  It took just a few seconds for the waiter to get the rest of Jazz’s order, then they turned to Danny.  “And what are you having today?”

“Same as her,” said Danny, waving in Jazz’s general direction.  

“Good choice, good choice,” said the waiter.  “We’ll be back soon!”

“Thanks!” said Dad.  He reached over Mom to pat Danny on the shoulder.  “See?  This is just a completely normal restaurant.”

“Mhm,” said Danny, dubiously.  He’d believe it when he got out of here with his questionably mortal coil and squishy, murderable human family intact.    

Okay.  Maybe he was being a bit overdramatic, now.  Was it because he was too far from the Amity portal?  He’d been sure it wouldn’t significantly affect him, though. It wasn’t as if physical distance meant much in this context.  Sure, he wasn’t on his home turf, but still…

Of course, he was a teenager. Teenagers were supposed to be overdramatic.  At least, that’s what he’d heard.  Being a teenager didn’t come with a manual any more than being a half-ghost superhero did, quirky TV shows about middle school notwithstanding.  

Yeah.  That sounded reasonable.  He was a teenager who’d been woken early, and it was still early, and that meant the world was terrible.  Excellent math.  

He sipped at the water the waiter had left him, pleased with himself.  

Which is when his and Jazz’s orders arrived. Danny caught a glimpse of red on him plate, abruptly recognized the prickling feeling in his eyes, expelled the water he was drinking from his nose, and propelled himself sideways across Mom and Dad and out of the booth.  

“Ah!” he said, pointing at the red-tinted pancakes and the pretty little flowers on top.  

The plating really was nice.  Just like the waiter said.  

The whole dinner was staring at him.

“He’s got allergies,” explained Jazz, her voice just a little too high pitched.  “Just—Really horrible allergies.  To flowers like this.”

“Blood blossoms,” said Danny.  He was reasonably certain the things wouldn’t kill him, he wasn’t sure that anything short of something like Gula could kill him, but every encounter he had with them had been painful beyond belief, and he doubted that their being cooked would help very much with that.  

“Right.  Blood blossoms.  The name always slips by me…  Haha.”

“Oh my gosh,” said Marianne, rushing out of the kitchen.  “I am so sorry.  I didn’t know anyone was allergic to them!  It’s just, you guys always talked about how they were lucky, and they got rid of bad spirits, so I thought I’d incorporate them, and they’re red, which is also lucky, and they taste so good—”

“Marianne,” said Mom, poking at one of the flowers, “where did you even get these?  I thought they were extinct.”

“Oh,” said Marianne, “my uncle, the one who died, well I guess they’re all dead, now, but…  The one who left me enough to buy the dinner?  He worked in seed conservation.  I got his personal collection.”  She sniffed, apparently on the edge of tears.  

“Ah,” said Mom, glancing at Danny.  “That’s interesting.  Um.”  She slid out of the booth.  “I’m really sorry, Marianne, but,” she gestured in Danny’s direction.  “Food allergies.”

“He’s had breakouts just from being around them, before,” added Jazz, helpfully.  

“Oh, no, no, I understand.  Um.  One second, let me give you my number, I don’t want to fall out of contact again, oh, dear.  Tracy! Give me your notepad!”

It took several more minutes for all the Fentons to make their way back outside, most of which Danny spent staring into the dinner through the large front windows, keeping an eye on his family. Maybe he didn’t have ‘allergies’ in the typical sense but being around blood blossoms was making his skin itch and prickle unpleasantly.  

Eventually, however, after Dad had shoved most of his order down his throat in a single go, they all got back into the GAV.  

“Oh. My. Gosh,” said Jazz.  “You two have no normal friends.”

#danny phantom #ectober week #ectober #ectober 2020 #ectober week 2020

[urimaginespimp]

Michael Gray: Better Man pt 7

Olivia remembers how she longed for an alone time with Michael when their relationship was starting to hit rock bottom.

And now she got one.

The only cons were simple. One, they weren't dating anymore, and Two, everywhere they went, there was this awkwardness in the atmosphere they keep trying to ignore.

They spent the afternoon roaming around Brooklyn, with Olivia telling Michael everything he needs to know about the place, while he would either reply with a simple 'oh', 'okay', 'that's nice', or the occasional "mmm".

Now heading back to their apartment, she was internally panicking on what to talk about as it was a far walk.

"Do you think it's true that Arthur and John were really using you to play catch through the window when you were a baby?" She asked out of the blue, trying to push the awkwardness away again.

"They laugh every time I ask again, but I think that's why I have this small dent on the back of my head." He chuckled.

"Oh yeah, I remember you have that." She murmured.

Getting the idea of what she was trying to do, he decided to go along with it.

"Do you remember the first time we met each other?" He asked in a playful tone.

"Hmmm I don't know what you mean." She feigned innocence.

"Oh it's engraved in here." He pointed at his temple before continuing with a teasing tone.

"You waltzed into my mother's house, started taking your dress off and threw it up in the air, while yelling how glad you were that you wouldn't have to worry about not fitting in the stupid dress Tommy was making you wear for an event." He let out a small laugh at the memory.

"And you sat there, all red, looking down on the floor." It was her turn to laugh at him.

"Hey, you turned red too when you finally saw me." He retorted, smiling.

Michael can remember it like was just yesterday.

He just met his mom, and was having tea with her. He was alone at the table because Polly went upstairs to look for photographs and documents of him when he was a baby.

He was just looking around the room when the door opened and in came a woman in a red dress, with her face made up beautifully, and her hair flowing behind her.

She didn't see him though, because the moment she shut the door behind her, she started unbuttoning her dress, making him panic.

"Poll I'm back, and we can finally get rid of this stupid dress Thomas made me shrink into!"

Michael wanted to stop her, but his voice got caught up in his throat. He's never seen a woman in only her undergarments before and was too shocked to respond.

He looked down instead, already feeling his face getting hot.

"I can eat fucking pastries again!" She yelled happily, throwing the dress up in the air.

It landed on the floor in-front of him.

Olivia, upon seeing where it landed near at, gaped like a fish, let out a small scream, then ran behind the nearest curtain.

"W-who are you and where's Polly?!" She exclaimed, peaking her head out and holding the curtain to her chest.

"I'm polly's son, Michael." He responded, still refusing to look away from the floor.

"Oh fuck." She muttered to herself. "You came!" She exclaimed sounding happy. "I am so sorry you had too see that! I- I'm not usually like this when I go in people's homes."

"What the hell is going on in there?" Polly's footsteps was getting closer.

Upon seeing the both of them - his son was all red and now looking at her, while a familiar red dress was on the floor in-front of him. And Olivia now behind the curtain looking guilty.

"You know what, I don't even wanna know." Polly said, chuckling. "Michael this is Olivia, we treat her like family. Olivia, this is my son."

And that was the start of their friendship.

After getting through a crosswalk, Both of them were thinking of another 'safe' memory to bring up.

"I remember you getting your first drink." She started.

"What about it?"

"It was your 18th birthday, everybody was having too much fun to notice that the birthday boy was making frequent zigzag trips to the bathroom." They both let out a small laugh.

"I'm way better with my drinks now. But why were you being a creep observing people like that during a party, anyway?" He smiled at her.

"I wasn't allowed to drink that night because I lost a bet to John and I had to watch his kids in the morning."

"What was the bet about?"He asked.

She shrugged.

She remember that day though, John laughing hiss ass off for winning a bet between them. His eyes full of playfulness. He then started thinking of ways he could punish her.

"Alright, liv, you think you're so slick, eh?" He was smirking at her.

"What are ya talkin bout, doofus?"

"Don't think that I haven't seen you and me cousin undressing each other with your eyes." He teased, laughing when she turned a dark shade of crimson.

"How about this..." He said leaning closer on the table. "I order you to kiss him tonight in-front of everyone at the party, and tell him it's a birthday gift."  He said, taking a puff of smoke.

Not wanting to embarrass herself that night, she decided to downplay it a little.

"Really? That's the best you can do? Not really a punishment there, Johnny. You can't go all soft on me now." She retorted, acting nonchalant about it, leaning back on her chair.

It worked though because John looked like he was now having second thoughts about it.

"Okay, luv, no drinking for you tonight, and you watch me rascals tomorrow."

Trying to hide her victory smile, she started protesting as if it was that bad.

She smiled at the memory.

"I can't exactly remember what it was about. But it was undoubtedly something stupid." She chuckled.

Falling into silence once again, hands in their coats' pockets, they were only a few blocks away.

"Remember when we got bored to the point where I agreed to go with you into trying to find Arthur a woman?" Michael asked.

"He was acting like he had a stick up his ass all week, and I was bored too. It was a two in one solution."

"Yeah except that narrowing down the options available in Birmingham left us with three women. One too afraid to even go near him, another one too eager to be part of the family, and one who turns out, preferred you." They both chuckled

"How about the time we made Tommy go all ballistic when we all pretended that I was secretly dating Alfie all this time and that I had accepted his proposal?"

"I think he was more mad at the thought that the whole family 'knew' and he was never once suspicious." Michael laughed.

"And he didn't know which one to strangle first when we told him it was all a joke, and not once has Alfie made a move on me."

He then remembers having to drag her away to run out of the house when she couldn't stop laughing and started telling Tommy it was his brothers' and Michael's idea.

Laughing about memorable times she had in Birmingham with the Shelbys made her  miss them even more. The closest to one she had of them right now was Michael, one whom she shared so much history yet couldn't even bring to talk about them just yet.

"Are you still fond of books?" He asked

"Never grew tired of 'em."

"Do you still French inhale when you're in deep thought?" She asked.

"My body still hates me for it."

"Wine?" "Still think they're overrated."

"Still driving?" "Can do it with my eyes closed now."

"Black?" "Still my favorite coffee."

"Gin for breakfast?" "I've successfully got rid of that habit."

"Still dancing?" "I haven't been to one in years."

"Still making weekly trips to the pictures? "Can't figure out why I haven't been interested in going anymore."

"Any man I should be aware of?" "None at the moment."

"You?" "Still confident that I'm straight."

They both chuckled and shook their heads.

That long walk home wasn't so bad. Both were smart enough to play safe in bringing up memories.

All fond ones, as if the bad haven't been clouding their minds.

#michael gray #Michael Gray imagine #michael gray x reader #thomas shelby #Tommy Shelby #polly gray #michael grey #finn cole #Arthur Shelby #John Shelby #Ada Shelby #Peaky Blinders #peaky blinders imagine

[peakybees]

My second piece of writing! Thanks heaps for the request, I kinda went on a bit of a tangent so it’s a bit different from the request, but hope you enjoy it none the less! Please let me know what you think of it! :)

Request: Could you please do an imagine were the Shelby sister is being really cheeky and naughty and one of the brothers (or Michael) have to deal with her! It would be cool to see how they would deal with this!

Ok so here’s how I imagine things:

- You’re a teenager, about 16

- Finn is your twin brother.

So you’re all at the round table in the house on watery lane. You are sitting at the table with Finn and Isaiah behind you and Ada and Aunt Poll sitting either side of you with Michael next to his Mum. Esme is on the stairs with John next to her, Jeremiah, Uncle Charlie, Curly, and Johnny Doggs and Arther adjacent to you. You’re all growing a bit restless because for SOME reason Tommy is running late. You know the meetings important, with the main topic of discussion being the company expansions and latest money schemes, which is gonna mean you and all your family are going to have to work hard for and make sacrifices. SO bearing in mind the importance of the meeting, just imagine everyone’s shock when your second oldest brother strolls in with Grace by his side. You roll your eyes, Grace doesn’t notice but Tommy certainly does, he gives you his BEHAVE look, to which you just glare back at him. Tommy starts talking, stating the purpose of the meeting, but before he can keep going, you interrupt. “ So if this is an important family meeting why is SHE here?”. Arther looks rather affronted, he’s not used to his little sister speaking like that, especially towards her older brothers. Polly smirks looking at you and then to Tommy (she doesn’t like Grace either). But Tommy just does his signature over it™ look at you and continues “Well y/n, Grace is part of the family, being my partner and all”.

You are not satisfied with this answer, AT ALL, bc didn’t this woman spy on your family? Break Tommy’s heart? Show a general lack of respect for your family? AND was the reason Ada’s husband was taken by police from her just after she’d had Karl?

“She’s no family of mine” you say quietly under your breath, but Tommy still hears it. “If you’ve got something to say y/n, say it now,“ he sternly says while glaring at you. He seems to think you won’t, but still, you sassily repeat exactly what you said while having a stare-off with him. The rest of the family only watches on as the two siblings stare at each other, the tension so thick you could cut it with a razor.

Tommy’s jaw tense for a second, but then he recomposes himself and says cuttingly “well y/n, it seems you are not yet mature enough to sit in on these meetings since you have no respect for my Grace and her important place in this family, perhaps you should sit this one out, and grow up a bit”. Grace smirks at this and puts her arms around Tommy while looking at you smugly. Finn and Isaiah sit there bracing themselves for the storm you’re about to unleash, while John and Ada glare at Tommy, both struggling to believe the audacity he just showed, with him putting Grace above you. Polly starts “Thomas!”, but before she can get any further, you pipe up. “You know what Tom, maybe I don’t want to be here anyway considering you seem to use the term ‘family’ so loosely. And you know what? Ever since she’s been back in birmingham it’s like I don’t even know you, it’s like you’re not even being my big brother anymore”. Tommys is taken aback by this. Grace starts to cower behind Tommy as the rest of your family give her death glares. “y/n” he calls out to you, but you’ve already stood and made your way out of the room, the tearful choke you let out not being missed by anyone in the room. Tommy sighs and steps away from Grace. “You know what, she’s dead right” Finn says as he stands to follow you, with Isaiah right behind him. “You went too far this time Tom” John gruffly says as he follows the two boys. The rest of the family get up one by one all glaring at Tommy and Grace as they leave too, leaving them alone at the table.

John finds you, Isaiah and Finn in your room, with the boys sitting each side of you comforting you as you cry. John enters and kneels in front of you, taking you in his arms as you begin to sob. “It’s alright my girl, you were totally right, Tommy was out of line, that grace womens been blinding him lately, but he don’t mean what he said to you though”. You mumble an acknowledgement as your sobs slowly quieten. All the while Tommy stands outside your door having sent Grace away, realising how wrong he was as he listens to you cry. ‘Too far, way too far’ he thinks to himself angrily.

#peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinders angst #shelby sister #shelby sister angst #shelby!reader #finn shelby #isaiah jesus #tommy shelby #john shelby #request

[tanjhero-a]

Life’s Trials to Meeting You

Pairing: Tanjirou x You (Gender Neutral Reader)

Prompt: Soulmates - Shared Scars 

Word Count: 4,502 (wow!! thats 11 fucking pages on docs yall. my god)

A/N: This is my fic based off the results of the poll! This fic was originally made as a celebration for 60 followers, and since then, this blog now has 130! I’m very thankful and flattered so many of you are here. I hope you all enjoy this rather lengthy fic- I had a lot of fun writing it!

You’ve lived your whole life in moderate peace. You lived in a modest household with several siblings and your father. Life was dull, but it was safe. Your house was in the middle of a small town and you visited the same shops every day and talked to the same people. 

You yearned for more. To travel out of town and meet someone new, do something new, something… exciting. You voiced this want to your sisters, but never your father. He loved you dearly, you knew, which is why he wanted you to live your modest and easy life. There was no danger in that.

But your father was a fool. Danger lurked everywhere, especially where you don’t expect it. It stays there, hiding in the shadows and waiting to strike. And finally, danger did come- in the form of a fierce demon that ate its way through the village in a single night. Your father had you take your sisters and run into the forest for help, making you leave him behind ultimately for his own death. 

Most of your sisters didn’t make it. One of them refused to leave father behind, and another one didn’t stick close to you and got lost in the ruins of your town before she was gobbled up. Your last sister, Tamako, was only three, and she was only safe because you held her so, so tightly in your arms as you kept running far from what used to be your home. 

Eventually, the adrenaline to stay alive wore out and you stumbled your way to a beautiful tree. Your vision was fuzzy as you forced your tired limbs to climb it, your sister holding you close on your back. The purple, beautiful flowers bloomed everywhere around the tree and hid both of you somewhat effectively. “We’ll be safe here,” you assured Tamako and situated her in your lap. “The flowers will keep us safe.” 

You really didn’t know that you were actually incredibly lucky and that the Wisteria tree you hid in warded off demons- you just prayed that the demon was full and wouldn’t kill any more of your family. You held Tamako all night as she cried, and though you felt like crying yourself, you kept the tears at bay. 

You had to be strong now. There was no other way.

---

When you awoke the next morning, it was because of Tamako’s cries. You immediately jolted to see what was wrong, only to wince and cry out in pain. She was crying because of the blood staining your shirt, which happened to be the problem. 

Did you get hurt last night and not even notice?

“It’s okay, Tamako, it’s okay!” It wasn’t, but what else could you say? Your body felt woozy still, probably from blood loss, but you still collected her in your arms. “We’ll be okay. We’ll find the next town and get help and food. Aren’t you hungry?”

The change in subject seemed to calm her down. She sniffles, snot smeared across her face which you wipe off with your sleeve gently. “..yeah.” 

“Me too,” you smile. “Get on my back, Tamako, then I’ll climb down.”

She clings to you tightly as you do so, and your feet slip a few times as you work your way down the trunk. Now that you’re aware of the gash in your side, it burns and screams with each move you make. Your just glad your sister can’t see the pain on your face as you finally make it to the ground with a loud groan.

“Okay, what would you like to eat?” You keep her on your back with your arms wrapped around her tiny legs, walking in a random direction. The first thing you needed to do was find a road, and then you could find a town. 

“Buns!” Tamako yells. “...Fish. Rice.”

“That sounds yummy,” you nod your head. “Maybe we can get something sweet, too.”

“Yeah!” Her legs kick excitedly and you sigh. She’s buzzing with energy so you let her down. 

“Don’t leave my side, Tamako,” you tell her gently and continue to walk forward.

Both of you walk for what seems like hours before you reach a road, and then hours after that before you reach a town. You carry Tamako at various times despite your wound, because she gets tired and you can’t afford to stop moving. You’re lucky you finally saw buildings in the distance when you did because you’re not sure how much longer you can stay conscious. 

You stop in your tracks and slowly sit on the ground. Tamako stands beside you, holding your hand. “Listen to me,” you hold her small fingers tightly as you look into her dark eyes. “I know it’s scary, but I can’t walk any further. I need… I need you to walk the rest of the way by yourself and get help.” 

“What?” Tamako’s lips wobble into a frown. “I can’t!” 

“No, I know you can, Tamako!” You pull her into a tight hug. “It will be okay. You are so strong, I know you can do it. Follow the road, and get help when you see a person. Lead them back to me.” 

Your sister holds you back as tight as she can, her body shaking with small sobs. “Will you be okay?”

“I’ll be fine. I just… need rest.” You kiss her forehead and let Tamako go. “I love you. I know you can do it.”

You squeeze her hand one more time before the little girl scampers off, running with all her might. You sigh once she escapes your view before you lay down. The best thing you can do is try to focus on your breathing, keeping yourself alert and calm as you wait. Everything in your body hurts- your legs, your side, your hands, and arms… You don’t know if you’ll make it, to be honest. 

Your eyes flutter shut as your breathing comes to a slow. It’s too hard to stay awake any longer- could you sleep as you wait for Tamako?

Something, some far off thing deep inside your head says that’s a bad idea, but you’re too far gone to listen to the warning. 

---

When you awake, you’re somewhere completely different. Inside a house, it looks like… Did Tamako get you help?

“You’re awake,” A voice comes from another part of the room, and when you look to your left you see a beautiful woman with a butterfly inspired haori wrapped around her. “Your sister was rather worried, and so was I. Your injury was dire.”

“Tamako…” You try to speak but your throat is hoarse and dry. The woman notices and takes a cup next to your bed. She gently lifts you up enough so you can drink it. It’s tea, you realize, and even though it tastes vile you down it all in one go. You grimace once you’re done and the woman laughs. 

“It’s medicine. It will help you heal, but it doesn’t taste very good.” She lays you back down and places the cup on the stand. “Now, my dear, what happened?”

You sink into the pillows with a frown. “My town… it was attacked by a man-eating monster. I… I was supposed to protect my sisters, but only Tamako and I made it. I must have… gotten hurt, but I can’t remember how.” You don’t want to remember. You don’t want to think back to that night in any capacity. “My sister and I hid in a tree for the night, and then we walked for a really long time before I couldn’t anymore. I had her find help for me…” You look around the room, noticing there are several other beds but none of them have your sister tucked in. “Where is she?”

“This is where we keep our sick and hurt. Tamako only had a few scrapes, so she’s not here. I think she’s playing with the other children.” The woman sits down on the bed next to you, looking sorrowful as she holds her hands. “I’m sorry about your town. We actually have people there now, burying the bodies… I can have someone take you there so you can mourn when you are healed.”

Something about what she said makes you wonder. “Who are you?” You ask. “Who is ‘we’?”

“I forgot I didn’t introduce myself, I’m sorry,” the woman smiles. “I’m Shinobu. I’m a part of a group called Demon Slayers… we do just that. Protect who we can and kill demons.” 

Where were you, then? You can’t help but think. Where were you when my family was murdered?

Shinobu seems to sense your thoughts. She frowns and you think it’s unfair that even when she’s upset, she still looks so beautiful. “I am sorry we couldn’t be there for you when your town was attacked.”

You don’t want to forgive her, her or her group, but you already have. You don’t have it in you to hold a grudge against these people who you don’t even know. “It’s impossible to save everyone,” you whisper. “I know that. At least you are trying to do what you can.”

Shinobu seems grateful for your comment. But then, out of nowhere, she asks you something rather bizarre. “Have you always had that scar on your head?” 

“Oh, that?” You subconsciously reach up and touch it. “Well, it’s kind of a funny story. Originally, it looked a bit different… it just appeared on me one day. And then years later, I get this headache and the scar changed shape.” Your father never liked to talk about your mysterious scar, and no one brought it up in the village. You had almost forgotten about it, honestly.

Shinobu looks at you a bit strangely. You wonder what the problem is before she sighs. “Were you never taught about soulmates?” She asks.

“Soulmates?” The word feels funny on your tongue. What on earth was that? “No… what is it?” 

“Oh dear,” Shinobu says under her breath, frowning a bit. “I’m not the best at explaining it, but everyone has a supposed ‘soulmate’. You know this because of your scars.” She stares at your forehead. “Soulmates are people destined for each other. So, technically saying, that scar isn’t your own. It’s the scar of your soulmate.” Then she looks down at your stomach. “They will probably have quite a scare next time they take off their clothes.”

You realize she’s talking about your scar, now. Quite frankly, your mind is blown. Someone meant for you? Sharing wounds? That seems so… otherworldly. Did your father know about this? Why didn’t he tell you?

You raise your hand to your head again, tenderly touching the red mark there. “Oh…” You look over to the butterfly dressed woman. “Does everyone know about soulmates?”

“It’s fairly common to know about it, I don’t know why you didn’t.” Shinobu nods. “Anyways, I should leave now. You need to rest.”

She leaves quite quickly, leaving you alone in the large room. You’re stunned still but can’t resist the alluring call of rest. Soulmates… It could wait another time.

---

The next two weeks are spent at what you learned is the Butterfly Estate. Shinobu and her team of little doctors help you heal, and they give you goals for each day. Today, you had to walk around the garden, making three laps. It drained you to your core, but Tamako ran circles around you to keep you motivated. 

It was hard not to give up, especially when you thought about what would happen once you were better. You’d have to visit your family’s graves, and then what? You and Tamako no longer had a home. What were you going to do…?

“Come on! Come on! You can do it!” Tamako cheers, shaking you out of your reverie. Well, you were far from being completely better, so those thoughts aren’t important now. 

You can worry about it later. For now, you want to enjoy your time at the estate and have Tamako as happy as she can be.

---

The day to leave has finally come, filling you with dread.

The people at the butterfly estate were so kind and helpful, so loving, that they began to feel like a second family to you and Tamako. You didn’t want to leave them at all, but it had to be done. A new, messy and worrisome chapter has opened in your life and it was time to start it. 

Tamako’s friends, the little nurses, helped pack your bags with anything you would need since you had basically nothing. They gave you food for your journey as well, rice balls and dumplings, making Tamako cheer happily. She played with everyone for one last time as you stood by the gate, watching them run around with sad eyes. 

“You’re welcome to come back,” a voice comes from behind you, and you realize it’s Shinobu. 

“I didn’t think you would be here! Weren’t you on a mission?” You embrace her tightly, glad that you were able to see her before you left. She hugs you back with gentle hands. 

“I finished up quickly. I know you don’t have a place to stay after you visit your family’s graves…” She lets you go with a sigh, looking at your scar again and touching it gently. You noticed that Shinobu lingered on your soulmate mark quite frequently, but you never knew why. “What if you stayed here? I could teach you and Tamako how to use medicine and heal.”

“But- you work with demons. Isn’t it dangerous?” You shake your head. “Tamako and I wouldn’t survive this life. We weren’t made for it.”

“But maybe you are,” Shinobu smiles. “This mark…” She taps the scar with her thumb. “It is a warrior’s mark.”

You have a feeling she knows more than she’s telling you. Shinobu’s always been that way, and it’s frustrating, but you know she’s looking out for you. “I can’t fight,” you tell her. “But… If you help me, I will try. But I won’t put Tamako through it, not for many years.”

Shinobu looks delighted by your answer as she hugs you again. “Wonderful. Then come back home safe.”

...Home. You hold her back, tears in your eyes. “I will.”

---

Once you made it back to the butterfly estate with Tamako, things got better. You trained so you could at least swing a katana and do some damage, though it felt silly since you were ultimately doing all this just to become a nurse. Shinobu pushed you though, telling you that it was better to be prepared and know how to fight than be helpless. You agreed with her, but it didn’t make the training any easier, along with studying medicine and healing techniques.

There was one night where you had trained alone, out in the forest focusing on the breathing techniques that Shinobu taught you and slashing at the trees. It was a quiet, uneventful night before you heard rustling in the distance. You were all alone, but at least you had your katana. You face the noise with a fierce grip on your weapon,  practically shaking in your boots before- wham- you’re shoved to the ground. 

Someone had run right into you, apparently, sending you both flying and rolling in the dirt. When you looked up to see who it was, you were quite surprised to see… a demon.

Your hairs stand on edge as you stare at the female demon and she stares back. Her eyes are a bright pink, her long hair colored red at the ends. And, most surprisingly, a stick of bamboo is tied around her head to cover her mouth. “Are…” Your throat is dry all of a sudden. “Are you okay..?”

You really didn’t know what to do. Your only experience with a demon was the one that killed your family, but you’re getting a whole different vibe from this one. Is that possible? 

The demon’s pink eyes look up at the mark on your forehead, her eyebrows drifting up in surprise. But whatever moment the two of you had ended when another demon comes bustling through, headed straight for you.

Without thinking, you take your sword and slice at the other demon, its arm coming right off. You take a defensive stance in front of the girl, and you don’t really know why. The demon looks outright repulsed that you stopped it, but you can tell it’s inexperienced and dumb by how quickly you managed to cut off its head. 

Suddenly you became hyper aware of your surroundings, and you knew you weren’t alone. There were more of them. Looking back to the girl demon, your eyes soften as you reach out a hand. “You were running away, right?” You ask her. “Come on, let’s go.”

Surprisingly, she takes your hand, and for some reason, she knows exactly where to go. The two of you run together, but she leads, taking you somewhere but you don’t know where. You would ask, but considering how her mouth is busy with bamboo, you decide to trust her.

Why? You really, really don’t know. Maybe you’re stupid.

More demons come, and even though you were told they don’t work together, it seems an awful lot like what they’re doing since they all seem desperate to kill you both. You fight until you’re drained, and then you keep fighting after that because it’s the only thing you can do to stay alive. You’re still inexperienced, though, and you can tell you aren’t breathing right anymore. The battle has overwhelmed and frightened you to your core, and you keep thinking, Why am I here? Why am I doing this? Who is this for?

Another figure, alone this time, jumps from out of nowhere and goes right for your demonic ally. Your body almost naturally intervenes, holding your katana up to the stranger’s neck with a fierce look on your face. You’ve already realized that he’s not a demon, but the girl is, and you can’t have him killing her. “Back off,” you snarl at him.

“Wh- oh-” the boy’s eyes go wide, looking at you in disbelief. “It’s okay. That- that’s my sister,” he stutters, and his eyes never leave you. He’s not even meeting your eyes, he keeps looking at… your forehead.

How did you not notice his own scar before? “Oh,” you mimic, the grip on your katana loosening as you point it to the ground. You look back at the demon behind you, your mind overwhelmed and dizzy. “Your sister…?” 

“Nezuko,” the boy- your soulmate, apparently- calls to her and the girl demon happily returns to his side. “I… Who are you?” He asks. 

“I’m…” You blink rapidly, looking at the ground. God, why was everything so fuzzy? “I’m…” Did you already say that? You look to the boy, concern in his gaze. 

Before you can say or do anything else, the exhaustion from running and fighting your first battle catches up with your body, and you’re falling to the ground as your brain decides to shut off. 

---

Voices are what wake you up. Angry, concerned tones that make you think that maybe people were fighting nearby. Fighting..?

“-can’t believe you got them mixed up in your mess, they aren’t ready-“ 

Was that Shinobu?

“-you knew and you never told me?” 

You didn’t know that voice, that’s for sure, but for some reason, it sent a warm feeling down your spine. 

“-not ready-“

“-not your decision to make-“

When you sit up, you’re hit with a wild headache that pounds your skull. “Gods,” you hiss in pain, and suddenly the fighting that you heard before stops. You blindly reach next to you, knowing there’s a cup of water, medicine, something, waiting for you. Someone hands you what you’re looking for and you murmur thanks as you down what was thankfully just water. 

When you finally blink your eyes open, you see Shinobu first, and a nervous boy lingering behind her. You recognize him but you can’t quite remember… then you look at his familiar mark and remember quite vividly who he is and you stop looking at him. 

Soulmate. 

It’s dead quiet before you muster up the courage to speak. “I’m fine, Shinobu,” you try to reassure her. “I know I’m inexperienced and I shouldn’t be dealing with demons… I know I’m only learning these skills for self defense, but… she needed help.” That’s all you could say.

“For all you knew, she was another demon. She could have torn you apart.” Shinobu says, anger still in her tone but you look up to her in defiance.

“But she didn’t! She… I know it’s weird, but I knew she wouldn’t hurt me.” You touch your chest, over your heart. “I could feel it.” 

Shinobu sighs, turning away from you. You can tell she’s conflicted. “You are still so ignorant.” That’s all she has to say before she leaves the room, leaving only you and your mysterious soulmate inside.

“I suppose I was ignorant. She’s not wrong. There’s still so much I haven’t seen or done…” you speak aloud, slowly working up the courage to look at him. “But I was right, wasn't I?”

The boy smiles at you so softly, making him look so trusting and handsome that your heart feels like it’s going to burst. He sits on the edge of your bed, next to your feet. You notice that his checkered haori is gone and instead he just wears his Slayer Uniform.

“You were,” he nods. “It makes sense why you would feel that way, considering…”

The both of you blush at the acknowledgment. He clears his throat with a laugh before he presents his hand to you. “I’m Tanjirou Kamado.”

It’s rather silly, but you indulge him and shake his hand. It’s firm and calloused, clearly he’s more experienced with a katana than you are. You give him your own name. “Your sister… Nezuko?” Tanjirou nods, slowly letting go of your hand. “How did that happen?” You ask, before quickly skidding to a stop nervously, “only if you want to tell me, of course.”

Tanjirou laughs, and even though you’re embarrassed, you think his laughter is beautiful. “Of course, I’ll tell you anything, ___,” he looks at you so adoringly that you’re sure that your heart really did burst by now.

The two of you spent what felt like minutes but was truly hours together, talking about your lives and tragedies, everything that led up to this. You found that you felt wonderful around Tanjirou, and talking to him was easy and comfortable. Somewhere between the stories, your hands found each other again, and they stayed linked and warm together as you talked. When you explained the demon attack on your village and how you got your scar, his eyes burned with empathy.

If anyone knew what losing your family to demons was like, it was him. Tanjirou was just sorry that you had to witness it with your own eyes- he was lucky enough to only see the aftermath. 

“I always wondered what had happened to you when I saw it on my side. It made me wonder what kind of person you were.” His thumb rubs the top of your hand gently. You can tell by his hesitation that he has something on his mind, but won’t say it. You smile and squeeze his hand.

“I’ve lived with siblings too, you know. I can tell when someone is thinking too much about something.” You try to help him relax with your comparison. Tanjirou chuckles, shoulders relaxing as he looks at you in a shy manner.

“I was just wondering if I could see it. Your scar.”

You understand why he was embarrassed and why he wanted to ask. It’s evidence of your connection. Tanjirou’s scar is so easy to see, but yours is hidden beneath clothes. “It’s okay,” you tell him, sitting up a little straighter against your pillows and finally let go of his hand. You lift up your medical garb just enough that he can see it, the smooth and light skin that covered the side of your stomach and waist. It’s big and ugly, in your opinion.

“It’s really there,” Tanjirou whispers, reaching out and touching the scar gently with his fingertips. “You really don’t remember how you got it?”

“I don’t remember a lot of that night. I think I blacked it out, erased it from my mind. To make things easier,” you whisper and Tanjirou nods in understanding, letting you put your shirt back down. “I wish I could have been like you, Tanjirou. Strong and willpowered, learning how to get revenge on demons and protect the ones I love,” you look down at your hands. They were so small and soft compared to his. “But I’m not a fighter, not really. All I can do is hope that tragedy won’t happen again.” 

“You are a fighter,” Tanjirou tells you. And when you look up at him, you can tell he’s not lying. “You protected Nezuko for me… you protected Tamako. You’re learning medicine to help others, and learning basic techniques so you can defend yourself if you need it.” You hate when he looks you right in the eye. How can one man make you feel so important? “That sounds strong to me.”

“When you put it like that…” you grumble.

“Good,” Tanjirou smiles again. You don’t think you’ll ever grow tired of how pretty he looks when he smiles. “You should go back to bed. You need rest after your fight.”

“Will you be here tomorrow?” You’re slightly nervous that he’ll leave as you sleep because his life is probably busy. 

“Yes,” he assures you. “We still have a lot to talk about.” 

You agree. The fact that you and Tanjirou are soulmates- that’s a life changer, isn’t it? Things are bound to be affected and shift. 

Tanjirou is kind and cheesy enough to tuck you in, giving you a shy kiss on your head, right next to the scar that brought you both together. “Tanjirou?” You whisper. “Is it okay that things turned out this way? That I’m your soulmate?” 

“Absolutely,” he assures you. “Things will become different, but that isn’t bad. I’m glad I found you. Or, well, Nezuko is the one that found you,” the boy laughs softly and cups your cheek. “I’m glad you’re here.” 

“I’m glad you’re here, too,” you say back, your cheeks positively warm under his touch. He kisses your forehead again before finally tearing away, exiting the room with a small ‘goodnight’ and leaving you with your thoughts.

Honestly, you feel good. Meeting Tanjirou seems like the start of something big, strange, and wonderful. For the first time in a long time, you feel like things are going to be alright. You can do this- you can fight and live. 

And you look forward to doing it all with your soulmate.

#honestly very worried yall will hate this JGDNGSKJ #its so long i didnt think it would be this long #and tanjirou is in like. the last THIRD #this fic sucks so much IM SO SORRY SDJGNDKGJ #im so worried this is bad it feels like this is so bad #any w a y ss #me: (sweats from anxiety) #hopefully the next fic is ebtter than this #tanjirou x reader #tanjirou x you #imagines #tanjirou kamado x reader #tanjirou kamado x you #tanjirou kamado #demon slayer x reader #demon slayer fanfic #demon slayer headcanons #demon slayer #kny x reader #kny #kny fanfic #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kimetsu no yaiba #tanjirou kny #demon slayer tanjirou

[justauthoring]

Left All Alone (3/?)

Prompt: Could you please do a Justin Foley imagine where his sister got kicked out after he left so she’s been staying with Bryce because she doesn’t know about the tapes and he’s always been there for her and Justin and in the school fight scene, Bryce makes a comment about her which causes Justin to lose it? X

A/N: Older brother Justin officially won the poll -- and to celebrate, we are starting with a flashback :)

Please don’t plagiarize my work!

Word Count: 1,959

one - two - three

Liberty High, in person, seemed a lot more intimidating.

Your hand tightens around your backpack strap, shifting uncomfortable as you stare up at the looming building. All around, students hustle around; you can hear drifting conversations as students walk past you without even batting you a look. It’s like you don’t even exist.

In that moment, you feel like you don’t even exist.

Suddenly a hand falls on your shoulder, causing you to jump. Blinking, you turn, your body easing slightly when you realize it’s only Justin, grinning over at you with a bright and wide smile. In all your life, you’ve only ever seem him smile that brightly and genuinely a few times. It was rare to see you brother look so happy and every time you did, it stunned you a little.

He never smiled like that at home. In fact, you’ve only ever see him smile at you like that. And never when around your mother or whatever boyfriend of flavour she had that month.

It’s enough to wash away your nerves completely.

“Relax,” Justin soothes, voice soft as he pulls you closer by wrapping an arm around your shoulder. You fall into him with ease, letting your head fall against his shoulder briefly before turning to meet his gaze once more. “It’s just high-school.”

“’Just high-school’, he says,” you mock, rolling your eyes at your brother. He pulls back in feigned hurt, lips parting in disbelief, setting a hand against his chest. Once again, you roll your eyes, scoffing, as you cross your arms, turning back to Liberty High. “I mean, look at this place; it’s huge. And I know absolutely no one, and no one’s gonna wanna be friends with me because i’m just the girl with a druggy mother and a non-existent father.”

You don’t notice, not right away at least, that at your words, Justin’s grin is replaced with a deep frown. Then, after a moment of no response, you turn to look at him, shoulders falling when you see the expression that crosses his face. Sighing, you bow your head; “sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Justin brushes off with ease. He shakes off your words, not that he’d been hurt or insulted by them; but more about the fact that it was like a slap back to reality. You imagined, here at school, he could pretend that his home life wasn’t so shit. 

“Besides,” Justin adds after a moment, grinning once more. “You’ve got me, remember?”

Justin’s grin in that moment becomes just a little too persuading for you to ignore. With a soft smile yourself, one that barely compares to his but is the best you can muster in that moment, you shrug; “but I always have you.”

“And you still do,” Justin reminds, emphasizing on the word ‘still’. “And you always will.”

Glancing down at your feet, you nod, smiling; “I know.”

“Now, come on,” Justin suddenly urges, slipping his hand into your own and tugging you forward. “I’ll introduce you to the boys.”

“What ‘boys’?” You tease, “i’ve already met Bryce. Isn’t he like your own friend besides me?”

“Oh, haha,” Justin scoffs, rolling his eyes at you as he opens the front doors for you. “You’re so funny.”

-

Was that... Clay Jensen with a gun?

Peeking your head past the door, you hold a hand to your chest, hesitant. You wanna step out there, though you’re not sure why. Maybe because you’re curious, maybe because Clay Jensen has a gun, or maybe, because your brother’s there and despite everything, you’re still worried for him.

Absentmindedly, you realize none of those reasons are Bryce.

But you can’t seem to make your feet move. You’re not sure about that either. Bryce hadn’t said anything to you when he left, but you had a feeling he probably didn’t want you getting involved with everyone. Not so much for your safety, but more because Justin was there. Bryce liked to remind you of the fact that Justin had abandoned you, without any sort of explanation, and that sort of thing was unforgivable. He often told you that you shouldn’t care for Justin as much as you still did, because he clearly didn’t care for you.

What brother just abandons her sister? Especially in a house like that. 

He doesn’t care about you.

But he’s my brother.

Not anymore.

Though, the more Justin keeps popping up, you were starting to wonder.

You can’t hear what any of them are saying. You’re completely left in the dark, just watching. Bryce inches towards the door at some point, which causes you to flinch, afraid; you figure it’s to call the police. But then Justin bellows something, it muffled from your side of the door, and he pauses. Justin and Clay continue to say stuff to each other, you watching with tense shoulders and a careful eye.

It isn’t until Justin takes a step toward Clay and Clay’s hand twitches, do you react.

Before you know it, you’re shoving your way past the door, running until you’re just beside Bryce, Justin’s name leaving your lips in a shrill cry. Everyone seems to halt, and you’re careful to ignore Bryce’s gaze as it falls on you, keeping your own head on. Justin meets your gaze briefly, before taking another step forward, his hand moving towards Clay’s. You inhale sharply, fearful despite yourself, but then, Justin manages to grab the gun and the tension seems to just dissipate.

In seconds.

Then, Bryce turns, scoffing. “This is fucking ridiculous,” he mumbles. You’re too focused on Justin to notice Bryce looking at you, until his hand falls on your arm, grip turning harsh almost instantly. A soft cry of surprise leaves your lips as Bryce’s fingers pinch into your skin. Your eyes snap to his own, swallowing thickly.

The sound of the gun cocking interrupts the both of you.

“You’re going to take your hand off my sister.” Is the first thing Justin says, voice low. As you turn to look at him, you find his gaze still on Clay, never wavering. “Then, you’re gonna go back inside and you’re gonna pour yourself another glass of whiskey, and you’re gonna forget that we were ever here, got it?”

Bryce hesitates a moment, before his hand falls by his side.

You watch as Justin wraps an arm around Clay’s shoulder, gently guiding him towards the car. And of course, Bryce speaks up; “I heard they filed for another additional witness. That wouldn’t be you by any chance, would it?” Shutting the car door, Justin simply ignores Bryce, making his way towards the drivers side. His silences causes your heart to spike.

Why would Justin testifying against in Bryce’s case?

Why does it feel like i’m always ten steps behind?

“You should be more scared then you are, Justin.”

What does that mean?

Pausing, Justin simply stares back; “Bryce, i’ve got nothing left.” His eyes linger on you for a moment, and your lips part, shoulders falling. Is that what he thinks? That’s he’s lost you? There’s not even a part of him that wants to try to fight to get you back?

He’s given up that easily?

“That makes me the dangerous one.”

Despite yourself, you find yourself inching forward when Justin opens the door, slipping into the drivers seat. Your eyes never leave his figure, almost pleading with your gaze; take me with you. But he doesn’t; Justin just simply drives off, leaving you with Bryce. The same Bryce that had been interrupted from having sex with you like he’d so clearly wanted. The same Bryce that had just been threatened by both Clay and Justin.

The same Bryce that you had disobeyed.

But I always have you.

And you always will.

Before you know it, Bryce’s hand is back on your arm, tugging you back inside without any care for you. He practically drags you, slamming the door shut behind him. You flinch, watching as he storms passed you, ironically enough listening to Justin’s words and moving to pour himself a glass of whiskey. You don’t move, staying routed in the spot as you watch him.

Then, after a sip, he speaks; “I thought I told you to stay inside.”

Lowering your gaze to the floor, you swallow thickly; “you didn’t, though. You just left.” Your voice is small, nervous. Stop speaking, you can’t help but think. You’re only making it worse. But still, your lips continue to move and you continue to screw yourself over worse. “And then I saw Justin, so I just--”

“It was implied.”

Biting your lip, you nod; “i’m sorry.”

Bryce just scoffs, taking another long sip of his whiskey. Your eyes watch him as he does so, playing around the edge of your sleeve, inhaling sharply. “My brother,” not anymore, “um, Justin... he’s testifying tomorrow?”

“Yeah.”

“Against you?”

“After that, does it really look like he wouldn’t?”

Fair enough. But; “why would he though? I mean, the two of you used to be brothers--”

“Take off your shirt.”

Blinking, your lips are left parted, swallowing thickly. You don’t say anything at first, stunned, then, you manage the courage to stammer out; “w-what?”

Bryce doesn’t want me to know.

He doesn’t want me to know anything.

Why?

“You heard me,” Bryce says simply, nodding in your direction. “Take off your shirt.” He pushes off the table he’d been leaning against, making his way over to you. With his free hand, he cups your jaw, guiding your gaze upwards so the only thing you can stare at his eyes. There’s no escape. “We’ll pick up where we left off.”

You don’t do anything at first, frozen to the spot.

“You’ve already disobeyed me once, Y/N.”

I don’t have anywhere else go.

I don’t want to anger Bryce. Ever.

Feeling your eyes water, you nod, your hands gripping the bottom of your shirt, tugging.

-

With shaky hands, you stare down at your phone, swallowing thickly.

I have to do this. I have to find out the truth.

The tapes were easy to find. It was also incredibly easy to find out which tape was what. It seemed different people each had their own tape; it was disturbing to realize every single one of them you knew. Thirteen was a lot to go through in one night, and originally you only meant to find out what Bryce had done. You may not know a lot about the trial or anything about the tapes, but you did know that Hannah Bakers mother was the one testifying against the school, and therefore, Bryce. Because whatever he’d done, it all tied into what had she’d done.

But then, you’d seen your brothers name and you thought back to those few months ago when Justin had been so secretive with you. He pushed you away, and that was essentially the beginning of the end. Because when he started acting strange, that’s when you begun to lose him. 

Shortly after, he left.

Just like Bryce, though, he kept the tapes hidden from you. You hadn’t known at the time that they’d been tapes, but, still. It was just secret after secret, lie after lie.

And now, you could find out the truth. The entire truth. Not just pieces of the truth; not just whatever Bryce or your brother felt like telling you. Not just lies. But the whole story.

It was time to find out what lies you’d been told.

With one more wary glance your bedroom doors way, shaking in your spot at even the possibility of Bryce entering, you press play on the first tape. Your eyes fall shut as Hannah’s voice floods your mind, unable to stop the uncontrollable shake of your body.

Hey. It’s Hannah. Hanna Baker.

-

Part 4?

Tag List: @kaelyn-lobrutto24 - @minigranger - @nickigv Let me know if you’d like to be added!

#13 Reasons Why #13 Reasons Why imagine #Thirteen Reasons Why #Thirteen Reasons Why imagine #Justin Foley #Justin Foley imagine #Justin Foley x reader #Justin imagine #Justin x reader #Brandon Flynn #Brandon Flynn imagine #Scott Reed #Scott Reed imagine #Scott Reed x reader #Scott imagine #Scott x reader #Brandon Butler #Brandon Butler imagine #imagine #imagines #my fics

[one-twisted-sister]

Syl and the crew

Sylvia and crew was the first ask her crew consist of  Herself,Ramses,Xellia, Zukker and Molly.  I’ll be writing the two others soon

Purple eyes snapped open as the sound of the alarm clock rang out one of todays popular song blaring out the form below the blankets shifted making the feline whom had been laying on the forms hip dig his claws in to keep from falling off which got a yell. "Ow ow! Twinkle no! bad cat!." Sylvia yelled as she the black cat finally pulled his claws back the bedroom door was pushed open as Canndi leaned into the room worry on her face.

"Syl?! you okay?." The Shogah asked watching was the Elviva fell back into the heap of pillows the cat moving to sit on the corner of the bed to start cleaning himself licking at his paw using it to clean his ear. "Fluffy little monster." Sylvia spoke as she rolled yo the edge of the bed to get up and head out to the kitchen  Canndi having already headed out there yawning as she got breakfast ready for her and her palemate Twinkle running down the hall to join them the bell on his collar giving him away long before he made himself a wear with his loud meows.

"Okay, okay I hear you." Sylvia spoke as she moved to get him food even though she knew that he would beg for their food anyway, the little piggy of a cat it was a normal morning finished breakfast thanked her rail got washed, Twinkle staring at her through a little opening in the curtain until she aimed the shower head in his direction and sent the feline running through the apartment. In minutes she had gotten out dried grabbed her things and headed off to work, Canndi staying to keep Twinkle company the fellow purple making the black cat wave his owner off to to work.

Xellia of course was already there that goldblood always on time and early Sylvia having trusted the lowblood with the keys. "Syl! Syl!." Xel yelled waving one arm at the approaching highblood while balancing a holder full of coffee cups in the other hand. "Hey girl what’s happenin’?." Sylvia asked as she pushed the door open once the goldblood had unlocked it. "I hope you didn't for me." Sylvia spoke as she pulled off her moonglasses and hooked them onto her shirt heading in back to put her bags down. "No! I just got here honestly." The girl beamed as she set the carboard tray down onto the front desk moving around to get her books out and laptop from her bag to hook up to the main computer a button being pressed, a smiling face appearing with an computerized 'Good morning'.  A door that read 'employees only' opened as Zukker stepped out yawning, the stairs lead up to his hive- well everyone’s hive where the group took their breaks and kept their food and what not.

"Yo boss." The garnetblood greeted rubbing his eyes with a yawn, Sylvia paused looking at the tattooist. "Something is different about you- wait you cut the hair." She pointed at her own head  watching the garnet nod. "Yeah-." He turned showing off his now short  cut. "Weathers changing plus it's easier to work with."  Sylvia nodded as she headed to get things ready turning the open sign on. "Oh! oh!, before I forget! Ramses said that he was taking Molly to an appointment this morning and that he'd be running a little late!."  Zukker moved to the counter leaning over it to give his mate a smooch. "Morning baby." Xellia giggle giving him a purr.   "Hey remember none of that in front of the customers you to." Sylvia spoke pointing at the two lowbloods. "But Syl!." Xellia huffed. "If you had a mate you would be smooching and hugging up on them to." The goldblood spoke as her arms wrapped around her mates middle, Sylvia opened her mouth to argue but shut it knowing full well she probably would. "Plus--." Xellia sang out as she grabbed a chart holding it up in both hands. "The polls on the website says everyone thinks it's cute well almost everyone." "What do the others one say?." "Well the other ones say they wanna boink you."   Sylvia stared at the goldblood before squinting at her. "Why in the name of the messiahs would you put that on there?!." "Cause your pretty?." "Oh no flattery wont save you goldblood."

Said goldblood moved to hide behind her mate pausing as she watched her boss start to crack up laughing making the goldblood blink before huffing. "Mean!." She yelled but was relieved that seemed she wouldn't be losing her job or life. "Seriously though." Sylvia spoke "Ask me before throwing something like that out there, make me sound desperate." The purple blood poked at her nose as she walked passed the two employees. "ETA on when Ramses will be back?." Sylvia asked as she walked over to the stereo pressing a button to get the music up and rolling before the front door would be opened and kept open by a stopper. "Oh! oh! I love this song!." Xellia spoke moving to dance to the beat before Zukker took her hand and spun her around a bit with the music, Sylvia rolled her eyes and shook her head watching the two before sighing playing with the buckle of her top.

Sometimes she envied them, the lowbloods every highblood looked to make it big become famous for one thing or another very few seemed to stop and smell the roses anymore always a boon to make, the sound of skateboard wheels and the occasional bark, Ramses came rolling down the walkway Molly standing on the board dressed in her little pink tutu tail going a mile a minute only when that board came to a stop did the canine hop off pausing to wipe those paws on the mat before running in a happy squeal from Xellia followed.  Sylvia crossed her arms leaning against the door watching the blueblood step on the end of the board making it stand so he could take hold of it.   "How is she?." "She's good turns out it was just a little cold and a belly ache  also apparently she has a heart murmur." Ramses answered leaning against the outside of the door way. "Other than that she's a chunky happy girl."  Sylvia smile in relief, everyone had been so worried about the pup when she wasn’t acting right. "That’s good everyone would be so upset if something happened, the box was filled with cards all to Molly, well have to do a stream later and open up all the fan mail."

Sylvia moved away from the door and headed into the place, Ramses following  that open sign glowing bright, each customer that came in was greeted by the pup doing little tricks to calm them that big smile making all of them laugh, Molly took her job seriously- calming down the customers mostly the younger ones before going back to either get a tattoo or piercings.  The little pit would spin in circles and trot in place seemingly dancing to the music across the room or lay her head on customers laps Ramses having taught her each trick the trotting or 'puppy dance' as it had come to be known she'd done by herself.  As always the waiting room was filled with trolls looking to get piercings or ink done  every seat filled until break time rolled around the group locking up and heading up to Zukkers hive to relax and snack Ramses flopped out on the couch, Xellia sitting on his stomach as Zukker cooked.

Each one took a turn cooking each day though when Ramses's turn came about they ordered out. "So Sylvia how do that blind date go?." Zukker called from his spot in the kitchen everyone’s attention turning to Sylvia watching her sink down in her chair with a grumble. "Don't ask." "Oh I'm asking." Xellia leaned in watching her boss. "The fucker was on his phone constantly I left half way though and I swear he didn't even notice I left." The woman sighed. "Maybe I should give up." Sylvia jumped as each yelled 'no' at her. "Just give it time Syl you'll find someone or thing." Ramses shrugged  getting a pillow throw at him. "Thing?!." The Purple huffed as Zukker came around with the lunch each eating and enjoying conversation before it was time to head back down and finish out the day Sylvia stepping out back for a smoke around closing time each cleaned the hell out of the place Sylvia always keeping the shop nice and spotless  before they left for the day.

Getting hope Sylvia was greeted by Twinkle as the cat ran to her meowing his little ass off rubbing along her legs. "Yeah, yeah mommy is happy to see you to." She chuckled picking up the cat heading to the kitchen where Canndi was already cooking dinner for the two of them. "How was the evening?." The Shogah asked reaching into the cabinets for spices. "Eh it was okay, like any other day and hey, not to much of that spice shit I like my tongue."   "Gotcha Syl."

#mytrolls #Anonymous #Mywriting #Myart #Sylvie #Ramses #Zukker #Xellia #Canndi #Molly

[iamartemisday]

53 + 86 for Bucky/Jane please? ❤️

Mutual Pining + I didn’t mean to turn you on.

You know what we need? Superhero Rom Coms!

Okay, so Jane and Thor have broken up. He’s on Asgard or in space or whatever. Point is, he’s not around. 

Jane is just getting to the point where she feels comfortable dating again. Meanwhile, Bucky Barnes has just moved into Avengers headquarters and can’t help but notice the gorgeous scientist running around with Tony and Dr. Banner. He finds out more about her from Steve, including that she used to date Thor. If that isn’t a total buzzkill. How could an absolute mess of a human like him live up to an actual god prince?

Oh well, he can still admire from afar.

What he doesn’t know is he’s not the only one with wandering eyes. The new guy was barely on Jane’s radar before she happened to catch sight of him in the in-house cafe. Any part of her that might’ve preferred blondes goes right out the window when Tall, Dark, and Handsome James Buchanan Barnes walks by. That he’s reading a book on astronomy while he eats only adds to her interest. Later that day she walks by the gym and catches him working out shirtless.

That’s it. She’s done.

Not that it would ever work out. She’s checked online (not by choice mind you, Darcy just won’t stop looking at those stupid fan websites) and Bucky has already topped the latest ‘Hottest Avenger’ poll by a landslide. He’s not even an official team member yet!

But yeah, a guy like that could have any woman he wanted. No way he’d pick her.

And so, Bucky and Jane both decide it’s time to be realistic. Bucky throws himself into training getting ready to become an Avenger. Jane throws herself into her work and also makes an online dating profile. She gets a few hits right away. All of them appear completely normal. None of them send her a dick pic. This might actually work!

She starts going on dates. Bucky starts going on missions. The stars align in the most infuriatingly perfect way because somehow or other, they just keep running into each other!

First time: Jane is out with a guy named Bill who is an environmental biologist. He’s a really nice guy if a bit monotone when he speaks. Jane’s not really feeling it, but it gets all the better when Bucky literally comes bursting through a window with some terrorist guy he’s fighting. Bill immediately freaks out and runs, leaving Jane behind. She honestly doesn’t blame him, but she’s not calling him back either.

Second time: Jane actually doesn’t mind when Bucky stumbles into the coffee shop after an eighteen-hour stakeout. This guy she’s with, who insists on being called Herbert I of Swizterland, was just telling her all about how he secretly conquered the Roman empire three thousand years ago. But oh no, that’s her dear friend who needs her help after a long night on the job. Sorry, we have to cut this short, Herbert- er, Your Majesty.

Third time: She’s not actually on a date, she’s at a conference which is nearly ruined by one of those extremist groups trying to set the place on fire. Bucky personally saves her from a guy with a hand grenade and is rewarded with a front row seat when the conference is rescheduled for the next day. Jane tries not to look only at him while she gives her speech. It’s harder than it looks.

Fourth time: Bucky is on a date. Natasha set him up with a woman from accounting. Her name is Cheryl, she’s pretty cool and definitely pretty. Not a scientist, but that’s no big deal. What is a big deal is how often she brings the conversation back to her BDSM kink. Like… over and over again. Bucky is no prude, but he’s not sure they’re ready to start thinking about who should tie the other up and spank them with a whip just yet. They just met two hours ago, so…

Bucky sends a coded message to Steve, who helpfully calls him with an ‘urgent mission’ Bucky needs to be on right away. He apologizes to Cheryl and takes his leave. This is how he finds Jane in a bar several blocks away. Some guy keeps trying to talk to her even though she’s clearly not interested. Bucky is still exhausted from the date and also just the last few weeks in general. He literally just grabs the guy, tosses him across the room into a wall, sits next to Jane and asks her how her day has been.

Jane does what she does next for a number of reasons.

1: She’s tipsy. Not so bad that she’s completely disoriented, but enough that her usual inhibitions are pretty much gone.

2: She’s been hot for Bucky for weeks. No point in denying it anymore.

3: What he just did is actually one of the sexiest things she’s ever seen in her life.

So she kisses him. Hard. She literally gets in his lap and just keeps kissing him until she runs out of breath.

When they let go, Jane thinks she should apologize. If her voicebox would work, that’s exactly what she would do. Instead, she kisses him again. People are staring at them now. A few of them whistle. Finally, Bucky has the sense to think maybe they should leave. He leads Jane to her truck and takes the keys to drive them home. On the way, they try to make small talk. Bucky ends up thanking her for helping him get over the awful date he just had. Jane thanks him for all the bad dates he got her out of. They start to joke about maybe just dating each other. Then it becomes less of a joke. 

Because of course, Bucky was never a downgrade from Thor. He’s gorgeous, strong, smart, and so so kind. In many ways, he’s a total upgrade!

And Jane was never just another fangirl. Bucky never wanted someone from the internet. He wants a brilliant, beautiful, capable woman like her. 

After their first date, where no one draws a gun or needs to form an escape plan, Bucky and Jane are thinking maybe this will actually work out.

Many dates later, when Bucky is about to go ring shopping, he knows for sure that it has.

#Bucky Barnes #Jane Foster #Bucky/Jane #WinterScience #fanfic prompts #fic I won't write

[pekorosu]

Interview Translation

Taken from “Akimi Yoshida A to Z: Special Talks and Interviews” pg. 45–54

The World of Yoshida Akimi

From the magazine “Queer Japan” which discusses matters of sexuality and gender.

An interview held by author Fushimi Noriaki is included in this special feature: “The Sexuality of Expression.”

Here, Yoshida Akimi’s works are examined from a different perspective thus far.

(Yoshida Akimi’s “Yasha” was in the middle of serialization in the year 2000)

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First publication: 2000, “Queer Japan” Vol. 2 (Keiso Shobo)

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Am I hurting gay people by drawing about homosexuality?

Fushimi: It’s good to see you again. The last time we met was about 8 years ago, wasn’t it?

Yoshida: Fushimi-san, you’ve aged a little, haven’t you? (laughs) You were more of a lively young university student back then.

Fushimi: I was only in my 20s at that time, after all. I’d just made my debut as a writer, and being an up-and-coming young gay man was basically my selling point (laughs). But more and more youngsters are showing up after me now, so within queer circles1 I’m like that old hag from your in-laws’ family that won’t shut up. Anyway, the reason we got to know each other was because I received a courteous letter from you after sending you a copy of “Private Gay Life.” 2

Yoshida: It was a very interesting read.

Fushimi: I was so surprised, I thought, “Why is such a big shot even replying to someone like me!?”

Yoshida: I think you must be mistaken. Within the manga industry, I’m still considered fresh from the country. I’m pretty much smaller than a small fry (laughs).

Fushimi: What are you saying, sensei? In last year’s manga feature of “Da Vinci”3, “Banana Fish” took first place in popularity polls and even beat all-time classics like “Phoenix” and “The Poe Clan”!

Yoshida: Wasn’t the selection for “Da Vinci” biased to begin with? (laughs)

Fushimi: No, I’m sure everyone in this country has read “Banana Fish”!

Yoshida: That’s not true. I mean, none of my relatives have read it (laughs).

Fushimi: Ahaha, is that so?

Now then, going back to the topic of how we met. In the letter that I received from you at that time, you mentioned that you were worried about being hurtful to gay people because you were drawing about homosexuality in your work. I was surprised to hear that you had those kinds of feelings while drawing.

Yoshida: I’m not gay myself, so while I think that the oppressive weight of falling in love with someone of the same sex is something incredible, it’s not like I understand it in an intimate way. So when people read my works, they might go, “It’s not like that.” There are times when I’ve felt apologetic, thinking about if there are gay readers who’ve found my works offensive.

But the tough part is the other side to it, that is, there just has to be some level of embellishment when it comes to expressing things to the general public, even if it hurts the people in the core group. Somehow, the depiction will always end up exaggerated in some way and because of that, there will always be someone who will get hurt. It’s extremely difficult to strike a balance there, isn’t it?

Fushimi: There’s also the reality of the story’s setting that we have to consider. For example, in “A California Story,” the people who live in New York, they say things like “You shitty faggot!” in their conversations, don’t they? Those are slurs of course, but I think it’s necessary for it to be expressed that way in order to adhere to the story’s reality. It’s to be expected after all, since the intention is to portray those characters realistically.

Yoshida: There’s that too… And there are very basic things like how I might be writing gibberish when portraying how it’s like to fall in love with someone of the same sex, and things like that… Of course, it’s not like I’m drawing it with the intention of hurting people, but I think that saying “I had no bad intentions” is just an excuse to escape responsibility.

Fushimi: It’s the opposite for the Yaoi crowd, isn’t it? Their perspective is that they don’t mean to depict real gay people, so their depiction of “homosexuality” is ultimately imaginary or just a fantasy that exists only in their minds. Have you ever thought of it that way?

Yoshida: Within myself, I have my own yardstick and I split these things into “lies that are okay to tell” and “bad lies.” But I feel like this is an issue that’s going against morals, or rather, maybe it’s reached the point of “a lie that strays from the right path.” I do have a “things I can definitely lie about” category inside myself as well, though.

Fushimi: I’ve had the chance to speak with not just manga artists, but also people who express their creations in various ways. But this is the first time I’ve met someone like you, who is in a sense, extremely proper when it comes to the issue of discrimination. No, I get the feeling that this is probably the first and the last time (laughs).

And so it was after receiving your letter that I was invited to a roundtable with “June.” 4

Yoshida: Right.

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“Banana Fish” is a version of a girls’ soccer team

Fushimi: Within our line, there is a word called “homophobia” which refers to the feeling of hatred or abhorrence of homosexuality. However, when I’m reading your works I sometimes feel a sense of heterophobia, or something like a loathing of heterosexuality, instead of homophobia. Sexual relationships between men and women tend to have a secondary position within your works, don’t they? Even though that’s supposed to be the main theme when it comes to shoujo manga. Is there perhaps something you feel like you want to eliminate when it comes to heterosexual relationships?

Yoshida: Hmm, I’ve never examined myself so I’m not too sure either… For me, I think of action-centric works like “Banana Fish” and “Yasha” which I’m currently working on, as a “version of a girls’ soccer team” (laughs). Girls wanna play soccer too, and outwit their opponents and make a run into space with the ball, that kind of thing (laughs). During my school years, when the guys get to have fun kicking balls and stuff, we girls were made to do some nonsensical creative dance. I was thinking, why do we have to do this sort of ridiculous thing? So maybe this is just a result of all that pent-up resentment (laughs).

Fushimi: You just said “girls’ soccer team” but the central characters in your works are mostly guys, aren’t they? If it’s connected to the idea of a “girls’ soccer team,” why aren’t they girls instead?

Yoshida: That’s because, something just didn’t feel quite right when it came to characterising girls back when I first started out drawing manga. After all, girls were kind of passive, right? Not so much anymore these days, but that was why I had to twist another aspect in order to make that “version of a girls’ soccer team” a reality.

Fushimi: You made your debut in 1977, so it’s been about 20 years since then.

Yoshida: That feels like an eternity ago… ah, I don’t wanna think about it (laughs). But at that time, people like Ms. Takemiya Keiko and Ms. Hagio Moto were drawing about relationships between boys, so it felt like that was an acceptable way to go about it. The manga field is just like the legal field in the sense that, it’s okay as long as there’s a precedent.

Fushimi: Ms. Takemiya and Ms. Hagio used that setting of a relationship between boys within a purely aesthetic world, but in your case, you went for a “girls’ soccer team” vibe (laughs).

Yoshida: That’s how it is when I’m making it into a manga. But the main reason I came to want to draw stories like this was because… back in high school, I saw a revival screening of “Midnight Cowboy” starring Dustin Hoffman. The impact of that movie was astounding. In the same way that a baby chick thinks that the first thing it sees is its mother, I think I now have the tendency to keep trying to replicate that pattern. That movie was really shocking. I can’t forget it even now.

Fushimi: “Midnight Cowboy” is less “aesthetic” and more “dirty” (laughs). It’s a story about the bond between two not-very-beautiful men, isn’t it? It’s not exactly a clear-cut homosexual love either.

Yoshida: That’s right. But, they had a connection that felt like, without each other they would drown and their souls would die, right? It just so happened that they were guys, so I get the feeling that the imprinting has caused me to keep replicating that sort of relationship between men whenever I draw as well. If that had been a movie about two women, maybe I would’ve been drawing about women instead. I don’t know.

Fushimi: That kind of connection… doesn’t it appear in heterosexual, or rather, in romantic and sexual love between men and women as well?5

Yoshida: When it comes to men and women, their romantic energy or their motivations towards each other felt a little different. Even when it’s based on my own experiences. As far as I’m concerned, I think shoujo manga are fundamentally stories about relationships. I think that’s where it differs greatly from shounen manga.

Fushimi: Speaking of relationships, do you perhaps feel that setting it as male/male instead of male/female makes for more interesting drama? Since there’s a barrier against homosexual relationships born out of societal taboos, and it’s precisely because they’re both men that there will be backlash against it.

Yoshida: I think there might be something like that.

Fushimi: Currently within the sociology field, it is said that this is the era where sexual love reigns supreme. However, in your works, sexual love (including heterosexual) seems to take a backseat. More than romance and sex, the connection between souls is of higher priority for you, isn’t it?

Yoshida: I think so. But, I also get the feeling that there’s love and eros and all of that inside a soul.

Fushimi: But in your works, sex between guys don’t get depicted explicitly, yes?

Yoshida: That’s because John Boyd and Dustin Hoffman didn’t have sex. The first thing I saw was like that, so (laughs).

Fushimi: It’s already fixed, like grammar rules (laughs).

Yoshida: It is. It always stops at the very edge (laughs).

Fushimi: By the way, I’m still in a relationship with the same guy as when I met you 8 years ago.

Yoshida: I’m still married too, not divorced. As always (laughs).

Fushimi: At that time, I was interested in sexuality, eroticism, why do people get drawn to each other, why do people have the urge to have sex, and things like that. Lately, I feel like that has already concluded inside me. Instead, what I’m most interested in now is: regardless of whether sexual love has ended, exists or doesn’t exist—do people have a partner that they can never let go of? It’s no longer about why people get drawn to each other, but why can’t they let go? Maybe it’s because I’ve become an old lady (laughs).

Yoshida: I feel the same way too (laughs).

Fushimi: It’s not about sexual love when it comes to long-term connections with people, isn’t it.

Yoshida: It’s not just about sex, but I think it’s definitely there.

-

Banana Fish was about to be laid off!?

Fushimi: Your works span all the way from science-fiction stories like “Yasha” to daily life stories like “The Cherry Orchard.”6 You sure have drawers full of stories to tell!

Yoshida: I wonder about that. It feels more like I have lots of shallow, wide but tiny little drawers (laughs).

Fushimi: Shallow? That’s nonsense. All your stories are very deep and meaningful!

When coming up with those stories, do you first decide on things like the characters’ personalities and upbringing, and make plenty of notes as you’re drawing?

Yoshida: Actually, I’ve never made notes. Out of 100 manga artists, there would probably be 100 different ways of drawing manga and I’m sure there are those who are very meticulous about their characters’ backgrounds. But I don’t really do that. Of course, I do sketch out the designs for the characters and show them to my editor before serialisation begins, but I don’t make detailed notes or write out the story. I just get a blank piece of paper and start drawing off the cuff.

Fushimi: For the real thing itself!?

Yoshida: I do sketch out storyboards and stuff, but mostly I just look at the paper and go, “Alright, time to draw!”

Fushimi: Are you able to see something on that blank piece of paper?

Yoshida: Hmm, I’m just getting out whatever’s inside my head. Kind of like downloading.

Fushimi: So you don’t come up with the whole story before drawing it, but instead let the story develop as you’re drawing it?

Yoshida: I do come up with a bit of it at the start, but anything after, I leave up to instinct.

Fushimi: Taking “Banana Fish” as an example, did you not think of the story from the start to the end? Did you not have a fixed composition of the story before starting serialization?

Yoshida: Nope. My thought process was like, “It’s probably something like this” (laughs). In the middle, it became “This way? Or that way?” and that’s how I proceeded.

Fushimi: I believe you’ve been critically acclaimed as a creator for your amazing sense of composition, but it turns out that you don’t draw only after making sure decisions?

Yoshida: Not at all.

Fushimi: In other words, the deadline for “Yasha” that you had been working on until late last night was all based on instinct?

Yoshida: Only instinct (laughs).

Fushimi: Don’t you get scared? Not knowing if you’ll make it to where you need to get to, not knowing if you can fold up the wrapping cloth that you’ve laid out?

Yoshida: Things will work out somehow. That’s just how it is.

Fushimi: So then, “Banana Fish” was in serialisation for about 9 years, but have you ever felt worried or wondered “Is everything going to be okay?” in the middle?

Yoshida: Not at all. The one thing I did worry about was whether it would get discontinued. It’s mostly just that (laughs). My works tend to do badly at polls, so it’s not very good for the magazine.

Fushimi: Huh? Your works? That can’t be true...

Yoshida: It’s true. I’ve almost gotten laid off a few times.

Fushimi: Unbelievable! But your works are all bestsellers!

Yoshida: Sales of the magazine and tankoubon are completely different, so in my case, it’s tough because I do noticeably worse in the magazine department. Even now, I’m working with this constant suspense (laughs). I’d be like, “Editor, please, just one more!” Every time the editor gets changed, I wonder if this is when I’ll get sacked for real. Up until now there have been a couple of times it almost happened.

Fushimi: Whoa, do they just come up to you and say, “I think it should be about time to end the story”?

Yoshida: It’s not even “should be about time,” it’s straight up, “You can stop any time now. It’s just not doing very well.” (laughs) I got told that about twice during “Banana Fish.”

Fushimi: !! No way…... Even though it’s such a famous work that would go down in history…... Absolutely unbelievable…...

Yoshida: Oh no, it happens all the time.

Fushimi: The shoujo manga industry is so harsh, or maybe, they just don’t understand what’s truly valuable.

Yoshida: But that’s how it’s like for everyone in the manga industry. It’s like soccer; the moment the coach gets changed, the fates of the players are changed as well. The players get transferred around based on the coach’s ideal composition.

Fushimi: Huh…… I guess it’s because it’s so unforgiving that good quality works will spring up again. The pure literature world is the complete opposite. We’re not exactly doing important work but the authors are all pampered, so good quality works don’t get produced as much.

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“Lovers' Kiss” is a favourite

Fushimi: This is probably a given, but is the main character your favourite whenever you’re drawing a story?

Yoshida: Hmm, it’s not about like or dislike… but I do feel like they’re the one that I work the hardest on.

Fushimi: I get the feeling that you add more venom when you’re drawing female characters compared to male characters. To quote an example, characters like Sayoko from “Kisshou Tennyo.”7 Or, side characters like Toshi-chan’s sister in “Longer and Slower than a River.”

Yoshida: I wasn’t really aware of that myself.

Fushimi: Do you not like that naggy side of women?

Yoshida: On the contrary, I think I do like it. It’s not so much “venom,” but a deeper, darker side. I don’t actually hate women who are like that.

Fushimi: Who’s your favourite character out of everything you’ve drawn so far?

Yoshida: I like them all in their own ways. After all, they did come from within me. I think it’s hard for me to say who I like best, but… among what I’ve drawn so far especially the more recent ones, personally speaking, it might be those from “Lovers' Kiss.” That’s if I were to disregard popularity. I grew up in Kamakura, so I’ve always wanted to draw a story that’s set there.

Fushimi: I wanted to ask about that too. I think, even if we were to go as far as to consider “Banana Fish” a same-sex love story, it would just be a fanciful depiction. But in the case of “Lovers' Kiss,” it feels like it’s dealing with real life same-sex love. Plus, it’s a work that properly parallels its depiction of homosexual and heterosexual love, isn’t it?

Yoshida: I was sort of conscious of that too. That series does have love as its main theme. “Banana Fish” or my current work “Yasha” are power game stories. Those have “power game” as its main theme, while this one is “love,” so naturally my stance would be different. It becomes a more personal story. When you fall in love with someone, you start to grow afraid of many things, right? That feeling of confusion and hesitation in one’s heart… I find that sort of thing very endearing.

Fushimi: That series is quite popular in the gay community.

Yoshida: Really? That’s nice to know (laughs).

Fushimi: It seems like a real tough feat to come up with just the romantic correlation chart for the characters. Did you think that up at the very beginning?

Yoshida: I actually like that sort of story composition. I did it in “The Cherry Orchard” and even before that. I like the idea of setting a specific location or a world, and then compiling everything that has been captured through different cameras into one story.

Fushimi: It’s such a tender story. You’ve mentioned splitting your works into “power game” and “love” but the characters in either of them are always people who have been hurt, who are trying to figure out how to mend their injured hearts. They’re ultimately stories about self-acceptance, aren’t they?

Yoshida: Yeah, that’s right. People hurt each other, but healing each other is also what people do. Or at least, that’s what I think. Things like pets and music don’t really heal; they merely offer temporary comfort and distraction. I strongly feel that the only thing that can truly heal a person is another person. That’s something I want to believe in.

-

Thanks if you’ve read this far! I hope you’ve found it an interesting read, just as I did the original :)

Final disclaimer: I’m not a professional and I’ve translated this to the best of my ability, so please forgive any inaccuracies or mistakes!

-

Footnotes that are not marked with "T/L note" are translated from the original interview.

T/L note: ヘンタイ業界 (hentai gyoukai): “Hentai” is probably being used to mean “perverted/abnormal” here, so I’m making an assumption that it’s reclamation of a term used to disparage LGBTQ+ people and went with “queer (circles).” But… now I’m wondering if it’s actually closer to something like “freak industry”? ↩︎

Private Gay Life: Author Fushimi Noriaki came out as gay in this book. It is a book that had a huge impact on the gay movement in the 90s. ↩︎

Da Vinci: A monthly general literature magazine published by Media Factory, beginning in 1994. ↩︎

June: A magazine that published stories and manga based on the theme of “homosexual love between boys” which is called “tanbi.” It was published by Magazine Magazine up until its 87th issue in 1996. Kurimoto Kaoru’s stories have been illustrated by Yoshida Akimi as well. (T/L note: To be clear, June was a BL magazine. Check out the wiki for additional reading.) ↩︎

T/L note: This bit sounds strangely redundant, doesn’t it? I’m not sure why he rephrased “heterosexual” as “romantic/sexual love between men and women” either. It’s possible that I’m missing out on some background context or something, but anyway I tried to keep it as close to the original phrasing as I could. ↩︎

The Cherry Orchard (Sakura no Sono): A short series depicting the daily activities of an all-girls high school drama club that is preparing to put on the play “The Cherry Orchard” for the anniversary of the school’s establishment. Serialised from 1985 to 1986 in LaLa. ↩︎

Kisshou Tennyo: An ambitious work depicting human passion and karma, centering a mysterious girl named Kanou Sayoko. Serialised from 1983 to 1984 in Bessatsu Shoujo Comic. Received the 29th Shogakukan Manga Award. ↩︎

#peko tls #yoshida akimi #fushimi noriaki #banana fish #well tbh it isnt ABOUT banana fish but it does get brought up quite often #am finally fucken done after months of putting it off #im tired i did my best pls dont bite my head off for any inaccuracies thx #also i used markdown for this post bc i wanted to use footnotes but idk if it works ok on mobile…

[snkpolls]

SnK S3E22 Poll Results (Anime Only Viewer Version)

The poll closed with 190 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated! And we apologize for the delay on getting the results posted! 

Please note this is the anime only viewer version of the poll. Manga readers, please click here for the results of the manga reader poll!

RATE THE EPISODE 168 Responses

The finale episode of the season received mid to high scores from viewers, 66.7% of participants rating it at a 5. A job well done by the anime staff!

Awesome, 10/10 and a magnificent ending to the season

Eep

Not very satisfying. I would have preferred a cliffhanger

I just wish it was longer because I'm a fiend 😂 thanks for doing this

This episode gave me more goosebumps than any other AoT episode!

Amazing Episode

It was extremely depressing, but excellent.

very good

LOVED IT

It was heartbreaking, yet satisfying

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS THE MOST MEMORABLE MOMENT? 180 Responses

The most anticipated destination in the series played some unforgettable moments. 35.6% of participants thought Eren’s dismal speech while looking across the sea was among the most memorable moment. 16.7% preferred seeing the Survey Corps’ first sight of the ocean, and 13.3% most enjoyed seeing Armin and Mikasa smiling together on the shore.

DID PIXIS AND HISTORIA MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION BY CHOOSING TO REVEAL THE TRUTH TO THE PUBLIC? 178 Responses

Pixis and Historia decided to share the truth of the world to the public. A majority 92.1% of participants thought that the decision to be honest was the right call, while 5.1% aren’t quite sure.

The decision to reveal the truth was correct, but it should have been done gradually. Too quick creates tension and disbelief, not at all creates more distrust as something is obviously being hidden

WHO DO YOU THINK WROTE THE “INTENTS FOR THE FUTURE” EXCERPT IN THE EYE CATCH? 173 Responses

The mid-episode info card showed an anonymous entry about “Intents for the Future” after learning about the truth beyond the walls. 37% believe Armin is the author, whereas 16.8% think it is Hange and 15% believe it is Historia’s writing.

Aren't "Intent For the Future" written by Grisha in his diaries ?

WHAT WOULD YOU DO FIRST IF YOU’VE NEVER SEEN OR KNEW ABOUT THE OCEAN BEFORE? 176 Responses

If there was no knowledge of the ocean up until now, upon encountering the large body of water, 50% of participants say they would first slowly dip their feet in. 20.5% would observe from afar, and a tie of 9.1% would splash their friends or contemplate the meaning of life.

WHOSE INITIAL REACTION TO THE SEA WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 180 Responses

There were varying reactions from the Survey Corps’ first encounter with the ocean. 26.7% were enamored by Armin’s reaction to his dream come true, while 25% of participants favored Mikasa’s playful reaction. 18.3% enjoyed Levi’s more cautious approach to the sea.

WAS FLOCH RIGHT IN CHASTISING THE 104TH (AND BY EXTENSION, LEVI)? 178 Responses

Floch had called out the 104th for their actions during the SerumBowl. 51.7% of participants believed Floch was right to speak up but maybe not so harshly. 23% thought Floch was out of line with his accusations, while 19.1% supported what he had to say.

In his context it was right

What he said has merit, but I feel like him shitting on Armin even though it was Levi’s decision made him look cowardly, like he doesn’t have the guts to say the stuff he said about Armin to Levi

This guy does very little in the one battle he’s in and acts like he’s some war veteran. They tell the scouts in recruitment that most will die and then he gets surprised and upset in his first battle when most die. The other characters have been through this multiple times now, he really doesn’t have the right to be acting so angry. Like Hange says, she has hundreds she’d like to get back. Maybe it should or shouldn’t have been Erwin, but he’s the lowest on the totem pole for who gets the right to say one way or another and is acting way too high and mighty

He was right from his perspective, but again he really knows little about them.

Yeah, I do think he was in the right for voicing his opinions but he definitely chose the wrong time and place to do so

No, his arguments were invalid since whoever who was going to make that decision was going to be influenced by their emotions because they are humans

Floch is a bitch

Floch is the Simon Cowell of the Survey Corps. He’s got a personality where he’ll speak his mind no matter what. Personally I think he was right to express his thoughts but I didn’t agree with him on some points and it was at an inappropriate time

No, saving Erwin would have been the wrong choice

He was right in chastising the 104th, not Levi

What he said was wholly correct, but reductionist. The value that Erwin brought was iron will, devious planning, and plenty of experience. Armin has demonstrated powerful will on his own, is a genius in his own right, and lacks experience. Armin has the potential to grow into a better strategist than Erwin could be, as experience is not an insurmountable obstacle, and it isn't like he has none whatsoever. While yes, saving Erwin would be better for the immediate future, saving Armin would be better in the long run, as he is the better strategist. Floch oversimplified the issue, and Levi's decision was the right one for the wrong reason

DO YOU THINK EREN HAS MATURED OVER THE COURSE OF THE SERIES? 180 Responses

Our main character has gone through a lot of developments since he was first introduced. A majority 76.7% believe Eren has matured into a less naïve and impulsive person. 20% of participants think Eren has grown but has not matured past his original ideals.

Eren’s development has been amazing. The best example is by the second episode he promises to kill every last Titan while in this episode he walks past one leaving it in peace. That sums his change up perfectly

No, I think he's naive because he immediately believed Rod Reiss and his views change rapidly depending on the memories

Yes, he was very quick to react and not only would he react quickly he would react in extreme ways (kill EVERYONE). Whether or not he has the same kind of goals (kill everyone) he certainly isn't so quick to react anymore, just look at him by the sea, calm. Calm or going insane I'm not sure yet

He has changed some views after all that he's learned, but still seems pretty impulsive and like he hasn't matured much emotionally

I don't think he has assimilated the situation quite right as he is now somewhat depressive, even more than in “the night before retaking wall maria” when the scout recruits tell them they looked different

DID THE MOMENT THAT THE CHARACTERS FINALLY SEE THE OCEAN MEET YOUR EXPECTATIONS? 179 Responses

The moment the characters have been waiting for has finally come. 36.3% of participants report that the moment exceeded their expectations, while 29.1% said it went differently than they expected but still enjoyed it regardless. 23.5% said the moment evenly met their expectations.

Eren's such a buzzkill

It was both heartwarming and sad to know that they have achieved what they set out to do but seeing a shell of the Eren we used to know sure us disheartening

EREN IS SHOWN AT A DISTANCE FROM HIS FRIENDS AS HE SORROWFULLY LOOKS ACROSS THE SEA. DO YOU THINK THIS INDICATIVE OF FUTURE DEVELOPMENTS BETWEEN THE TRIO? 180 Responses

Eren’s sorrowful gaze and distance from his friends sparked some theories about the future of his friendship between the trio. 55% of participants believe this indicates Eren will start to move away from his friends as time progresses, whereas 32.8% believe Eren may “leave them behind” as usual but they will always manage to reunite. 9.4% expect the three will remain close no matter the obstacle.

Yes and no. I feel like he will start to distance himself more to contemplate his life and what he had learned but will still hang around his friends even if their bond isn’t as good as it was earlier on

Been spoiled on this lol

HOW DO YOU READ EREN’S WORDS “IF WE DESTROY THE ENEMY WILL WE FINALLY BE FREE?” 180 Responses

There have been a few interpretations of Eren’s closing words of the season. 42.8% believe he is pondering whether destroying their enemies across the sea will even be enough to set them free, while 24.4% believe Eren has come to the realization that there is no true freedom in the end. 16.7% think Eren’s words mean that he thinks destroying their enemies is the only way out of their hell, and 15.6% think he’s wondering if freedom is worth the price of all the killing.

He is conflicted about this thought, and question if it's the only way

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE PARADIS PLANS TO DO ABOUT THEIR LOOMING THREAT MARLEY? 178 Responses

Now that they are aware of Marley as their big threat, Paradis must take measures to respond. 29.8% of participants believe Paradis will advance their weapons and go on the defensive if Marley decides to attack again. 29.2% believe Paradis will be the one to initiate an attack onto Marley’s land themselves.  24.2% are still not sure what exactly Paradis plans to do.

I think the survey corps will infiltrate Marley similarly to how Reiner, Bertoldt and Annie infiltrated the walls

THERE WERE SOME UNSEEN SCENES IN THE CREDITS. WHEN DO YOU THINK THESE SCENES TAKE PLACE? 179 Responses

There were some scenes in the credits that weren’t shown in previous episodes. 45.8% believe these scenes are to occur sometime in the future, while 13.4% believe these are from the past. 11.7% think the scenes are general and can belong to any time period. Some people skipped the credits—have you not learned from Part 1? :P

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

First time we see the seashell and I wonder what’s the meaning behind it. Excited about the next season, as the post credits scene is probably a teaser for season 4 and the seashell appears once again!

Can’t wait for s4

TBH, I was really hoping we’d see Colossal Armin this episode just cause I wanna see how his design would look, even though I knew there wasn’t any good way to fit it in this episode. That being said, everything else was a nice sendoff before the final arc

Jean deserves credit for being the only reasonable person during the Floch argument and de-escalating the situation

It might have undercut the tone of the episode, but I still wish we got a cliffhanger like season 1 (and to a lesser extent season 2)

Something we could ponder over the next year and a half and keep us theorizing. Still great tho

Lovely end, but very different from end of season 2

If what is implied is true, Historia is in huge danger of having something terrible happened to her. Also, Eren seems to be going from "obnoxious violent brat" to "depressed murdersome warmonger" due to his obsession with "true freedom"

I have no idea where the series is heading and its exciting

Honestly at this point I've lost interest in this series. Everything about Marley and war psychology is zero interest to me, it really feels like they're drifting from that the story is actually about (or what made it great to begin with)

This is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Eren has better hair

I loved it! Such an amazing end to an amazing part of the show, the credits were ominous yet hopeful for the future, and I loved the last scene of Eren keeping the shell from Armin. I thought we’d finally see Armin in his titan form, but them seeing the sea was a pleasant surprise

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 171 Responses

Thank you so much to everyone who participated!!

#snk poll #snk polls #snk s3 #poll results

[theworldofsisi]

Overdose Scene 3

Kim HimChan stared at the bowl of food sitting on the table in front of him longingly. He was hungry - no, starving was more like it. He wanted to eat, but couldn't bring himself to put his chopsticks in the food and bring it to his lips. He had gained weight, after all of the methods he had tried to keep it off. The visual member of B.A.P had struggled with body image issues his entire life - he had been a heavier kid and it had been hard for him to find cool clothes like other boys could wear while growing up, but despite not always being comfortable in his skin, he had never let it get him down.

That had been until he was about twenty years old and was scouted by TS Entertainment to be in a new boy band that the company was planning to debut the following January. The director, Tae-Sung, had told HimChan that he liked how Him sounded and thought that he had natural good looks, but the only problem was that at his weight he didn't fit in with the “boy band image.” Tae-Sung told Him that there was no way that he would do well on popularity polls on Naver if he didn't lose weight because no female fans would be interested in a heavy-set member.

Hearing that he was too heavy to ever be thought of as attractive destroyed any self-confidence that HimChan had in himself. Being insulted in that way made him feel angry and hurt, and for awhile, he used those emotions to fuel the binge diet that TS put him on so that he could lose enough weight before B.A.P's scheduled debut date. After a few months on the diet, HimChan's weight loss came to a halt and Tae-Sung realized that they were quickly running out of time.

Even though he never stated it directly, HimChan understood loud and clear that the director was implying that he wanted him to starve himself to make him lose weight faster. It started with HimChan eating small meals and doing things like skipping breakfast, eating half of a salad for lunch, and the other half of his salad for dinner. He did this for a few months and saw some results and the director seemed to be satisfied with his level of progress, but to HimChan, it wasn't enough. He wasn't doing enough - he still wasn't good enough.

HimChan purged for the first time after eating a full meal one night. He had over indulged in his favorite food, pasta, which was full of calories and fats. Feeling physically sick after realizing how much he had eaten, HimChan made himself throw up the food. At first, the experience is hard for him, but after doing it for a few more days, HimChan realized that he liked the way that it felt.

He was now able to eat anything he wanted without having to worry about gaining weight. This method of weight loss quickly proved to be far from full proof when after days of either starving himself completely or purging anything he ate, HimChan would become so hungry that the only thing that he could think of would be food. He would cave in and binge eat until he felt sick, then purge everything he had eaten, encasing him in a vicious and unhealthy cycle.

Eventually, HimChan lost enough weight to satisfy Tae-Sung, but even after reaching a weight that he felt at least okay at, he wasn't able to stop starving himself. Every time he began eating regularly, the company cautioned him against eating more than he needed to prevent him from gaining weight again.

With a sigh Him stuck his chopsticks in the noodles in front of him, grabbing some beef and vegetables along with them. He put the food in his mouth and chewed stiffly, not really tasting it. His stomach rumbled hungrily at the little bit of food, but HimChan quickly found himself feeling sick. That happened a lot when he ate - it wasn't that the bulimia made him puke. His body did that for him - it was as if it was used to not getting nutrients and immediately rejected what he ate. Despite mounting nausea, he ate another bite of food then another, continuing until he had eaten half of the bowl.

He dipped his chopsticks back in for another bite, but his stomach gave a lurch and he knew that he wasn't going to be able to keep the food down. It was in him slowly but surely adding to the weight that already wouldn't leave his body. The little bit of food moved uncomfortably in HimChan's stomach and he grimaced, knowing that he was going to give in. He couldn't deal with the nausea - if he just purged, it would be over quicker. Waiting the feeling out was torture that just wasn't worth it.

Him pushed his chair back from the table and stood up quickly, causing his head to swim mercilessly. With legs feeling like jelly, he rushed to the bathroom at the other end of the dorm, locking the door before sliding to his knees in front of the toilet. He laid his head against the closed lid, heart beating fast and desperately trying to calm down his erratic breathing. Without warning his stomach rebelled and he flipped the lid up, barely managing to lean his head over the bowl before his dinner made its reappearance.

He gagged and retched again, but nothing came up. He felt full like there was a ton of bricks in his stomach and not just half of a bowl of food he normally loved. The feeling was too much - he had eaten too much. He was going to get fat again, he wouldn't look good anymore if he didn't stay thin. B.A.P couldn't have a fat visual - it would ruin their reputation. That same damned reputation that was the reason that his entire ordeal had started.

The feeling of fullness didn't go away and Him couldn't take it anymore. With a shaking hand, he closed his eyes, refusing to look at the toilet as he shoved his fingers in his mouth, triggering his gag reflex. He vomited again, this time feeling a pleasant sensation of release as the fullness in his stomach began to evaporate.

He hated himself for thinking that it felt good - how could something like this ever be enjoyable? He was making himself sick to lose weight. That wasn't normal, he wasn't normal anymore. By this point he was a freak, right? Addicted to the feeling of being able to eat and not gain weight.

But that was a double-edged sword, wasn't it? Because in the end, this was always the final result. He couldn't remember the last time he had enjoyed a full meal and kept it all down. It always came up one way or another, whether by his fingers or his own body rejecting food because it was so often starved.

The worst part was that even though he felt less full, he wasn't done. He still had too much in his body - it was like poison. Toxic, slowly killing him. He had to get it out, too. That only made it easier as he shoved his fingers deeper into his throat, instantly causing him to let out more.

He went on like this for a few more minutes, until he was dry heaving and his throat felt like sandpaper. The only thing he hated was the aftereffects of the acidic substance burning his throat. He had thrown up more than he usually did - he was sure that the leftover stomach acid coating his throat would leave painful sores that would make singing his lines hard, but he would just ignore the pain - it was his fault anyway.

HimChan didn't dare move from the floor as he still felt sick, but he heard a soft knock on the door and his heart stopped. Dammit, he hadn't thought of the other members in the dorm. He was an idiot - they had probably all heard him. They would know that he did this to himself, that he wasn't normal.

A moment later he heard a low voice on the other side of the door and recognized JongUp instantly. “Hyung, are you alright? I thought I heard someone throwing up.”

Still shaking, HimChan didn't answer but reached up and unlocked the door. He was terrified of being caught, but maybe just maybe he could play it off as the stomach flu or food poisoning. He hated the thought of lying to his naive dongsaeng, but the truth would hurt more than the lie.

The door creaked open and JongUp stood in the doorway, concern clearly in his sharp gaze. He took one look at the shaking HimChan on the floor then into the toilet and understanding dawned on his face. He walked to the sink and filled a cup with water before squatting beside HimChan. He held the cup out to the older member but quickly realized that his hyung wouldn't be able to hold the cup without spilling it all over both of them. He helped him guide the cup to his lips and take a sip before rinsing his mouth out and spitting it into the toilet.

HimChan repeated the process a few times before the taste of vomit was fully out of his mouth. His shaking lessened and he held the cup on his own, swallowing the rest of the water to ease his parched throat. JongUp eyed him quietly, but HimChan knew that he was just giving him a minute to recover before attacking him with questions.

He reached up and flushed the toilet before standing up and sliding past JongUp to stand in front of the sink. He was pale and sweaty - he didn't look well at all. With a slight wince, he washed his hands and then grabbed his toothbrush from the medicine cabinet. JongUp stood as his hyung cleaned up, gaze never leaving him.

Once HimChan was finished, the older maknae of B.A.P gave him a weird look that made Him's heart beat faster. Here it comes - the moment where JongUp would tell him that he knows everything. “Hyung, why were you sick?” was all he asked, his voice casual and unassuming.

HimChan relaxed slightly, realizing that he could easily play it off. “The stir fry made me sick. I think I used too much oil to cook it with.”

JongUp shook his head in disagreement. “Yeah, but all five of the rest of us ate that same stir fry, and none of us are feeling sick. Why was it just you?”

“Everyone's bodies are different, Jonguppie.”

“Maybe, but you eat burgers from the Shake Shack every time we go to the States. They're greasier than the entire pot of stir fry, and you eat more of them than you did your food tonight. I saw your bowl on the table- you barely at half of it. How did that little make you sick, but not all of us who finished our bowls?”

“I don't know why, but it did. What else would have made me sick?”

JongUp bit his lip and looked at the ground as if mentally debating. In the end, he gave HimChan a sharp look, knowing that his next words were for his hyungs own good. “Did you?”

“Did I what?”

“Did you make yourself sick? Don't try and use the stir fry as an excuse. When you tried to grab water out of my hand, I smelled puke. I know that we were right beside it, but it smelled closer, hyung. It was on your hand or something.”

HimChan felt his heart rise up into his throat but he took a breath. JongUp seemed to be onto something, but he could still get out of this if he tried. “I was feeling pretty sick, JongUp. I puked in my hand before I got to the bathroom.”

“Why wasn't there a mess anywhere else, then? I don't think you could have done that without at least some getting on yourself or the floor. Plus, our room is right next to the kitchen, and I would have heard you if you had thrown up. I didn't hear you until I came to use the bathroom.”

“You were in a room with five other people. I'm sure you could have been distracted and not heard because everyone else was being noisy.”

“That's the thing, though. YongGuk and Junhong are sleeping, DaeHyun and YoungJae are watching a movie with headphones in, and I was reading posts on twitter. It was completely quiet.” JongUp shook his head in resignation. “Maybe the food did make you sick, but I'm not convinced that you're not lying to me, hyung. You've been nervous since I got in here - you're still sweating even though I cut the air on.”

“Y..you cut the air on?”

JongUp nodded. “Yeah, while you were brushing your teeth - you were too distracted to notice. It made it colder in here, but you're still sweating just as bad. People usually do that when they're hiding something.”

HimChan laughed sarcastically against his will. “Did you learn that in high school psychology?”

JongUp glared, instantly shutting the older member up. “Yeah, I did. But I'm not wrong, am I? You're nervous because you know that I'm onto you.”

“I'm sweaty because I just puked my guts up, JongUp. Are you ever cold after you've just been sick? It heats your entire body up for awhile.”

“Normally when I'm legitimately sick, I have cold chills underneath the heat. Are you cold, hyung?”

“No, I'm not. But not everyone is like you - I get hot after I throw up.”

“Really? Because last time you had the stomach flu, you were complaining that you were freezing and took all of our blankets to warm yourself up, even though you had a high fever too.”

“I..” HimChan tried to swallow the lump in his throat. “Your body doesn't always have the same reaction to being sick - this is a different type of sickness, anyway. I got sick from food, not from a virus.”

JongUp sighed as he realized that if he didn't use the bathroom soon, his bladder was going to explode. “Sure you did, hyung..” He moved closer to the toilet before looking at HimChan over his shoulder. “I need to pee. Close the door, will you?

HimChan complied, happy to finally escape his dongsaeng's interrogation. The kid was a lot sharper than he gave him credit for, and it terrified him. Did he actually know or was he just taking an educated guess? More to the point, how had he found out? Had he really been that careless that it was easy for B.A.P's most 4D member to find out so easily?

The visual's head was pounding again, this time not from mounting nausea. With a sigh he walked to the member's shared bedroom and crawled into his bed, ignoring curious looks from DaeHyun and YoungJae who were laying on the floor watching a movie.

Once completely covered by his blankets, HimChan felt tears spring to his eyes and he let them fall against his sheets, choked sobs being swallowed by the pillow.

#himchan #yongguk #zelo #youngjae #jongup #Daehyun #bap #best absolute perfect #daejae #jonglo #banghim #angst #smut #mental health #trigger warning