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justalittleguest · 29 days

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Unleash your demons, let me dance with them and know them better

Ok so I’m a bit (a lot) embarrassed about that post but it’s not like I forgot the AU. It’s the quite opposite, so thanks for letting me rant a bit @kredena-dark.

The background + town lore (or what I have of it)

SO the setting of the AU is in a bigger town than the Dreamtale village was, built from its ruins, and it takes place in the early 1800s cuz I said so. The tales of the Tree of Feelings that occasionally attracted travelers and opportunists to the village did so even after the apple incident, which is how its residents’ remains were found. No one knew what happened, but they recalled being told about the twin guardians of the Tree, now a stump without fruit, that were a young golden eyed saint and a spawn of all the world’s evil. The demon must’ve taken the golden apples, then killed the villagers and his brother who tried to stop him, only to disappear. In the aftermath, the relatives of the dead came to bury the human bodies and unidentified dust. Most of them stayed, the journey back being too long and hard to justify going through twice. The generations after didn’t forget the reasons given for their living there or the stories of the demon that feasts on their flaws and fears that will one day come back for them. The world was soon to deny the Tree of Feelings ever existed, despite many future scholars finding the “myth” interesting enough to investigate. But after so many centuries, the townspeople forgot the way to their Tree, and never honored it, having arrived after it was dead and useless.

(When the trio finds it, it becomes a place of worship)

The cult beliefs

I haven’t organized my thoughts very well, but I thought it would be cool for the belief system to be rooted in positivity, though twisted. A kind of “It will get better” mindset, but with the addition of “when all our sorrows are 6000 feet deep”. It’s a guarantee of a kinder world, and one they can achieve with their own actions. The idea is, they can wait until humanity and monsterkind run themselves into the ground, the scars they left on their home and each other invisible thousands of years ahead, buried under new stone and soil, and only then can life begin again- right this time. Or they can end it before the world has to come to that, and choose who gets to make it to the new one.

The mechanics of it are based in an interpretation of the Tree of Feelings.

᯽ They believe that the death of the Tree of Feelings gave the start to a slow decay of their world, and that the entity, guardian, which had caused it has the ability to finish their job. They need a call to come back from slumber.

᯽ They believe that the villagers killed as the Tree was are still roaming the earth as spirits, tainted and disallowed from entering heaven or hell.

᯽ They believe the spirits will be allowed into bodies when life starts again.

᯽ They believe that the event can be repeated, that blood spilt where it had been 300 years ago will be the only way to call out to the dark guardian.

᯽ They believe the guardian will need a body, a lack of which kept them away.

They also believe in fate. Bad things happen for a reason, so make them worth it. No, Horror hadn’t been chased out of his home with his brother by a cruelly calculated famine to feel guilty the rest of his life, he was led to a God who needs his compassion to save the world from itself. No, Dust hadn’t been placed in an asylum and forced into men’s clothes for fun, she was given the strength to do what must be done. No, Killer hadn’t lost all of himself so he could serve some king, he learned thought to overthrow more than monarchy.

(You see how that mindset works if you have unprocessed trauma)

The characters & what’s their deal

So you know how cults all have a charismatic liar to follow? This one has three!

Horror is first because in the story I could but won’t write, he’s the first we get to know. He was the unofficial leader of his rural community, which in the past several years had more and more of its resources taken, and their supplies cut off. They’ve managed small rations for 7 years before the shortage became a famine. Many died giving their limited food to the children, like Papyrus did. Horror couldn’t control that, and he couldn’t live with it. When he got the chance, he left his people without a leader, and took his brother with him. Currently, his contribution to the cult is recruitment and keeping followers in line with his warm and knowing air, his experience giving people hope and giving them confidence to believe what he believes. If you have doubts, you’ll end up by his side, soon newly energised to continue your mission.

Dust had carved out a little life for herself two towns away from her childhood home, after her parents kicked her out a decade ago. She didn’t know they had another child until after they died, and he was sent to live with her. Dust and Papy were a small but happy family for a couple of peaceful years, preceding her many restless months at the asylum. Yes, she ended up “recovering” and was let go back to Papy, but she couldn’t stay recovered for long. And they’d use it against her, they’d take her from her little brother, permanently. So Dust took her deceased parents’ house and moved back. Papy was going to public school again, and Dust was back on the farm, spending her working hours contemplating the life that she dipped into in the madhouse, a life without her baby brother. Her duties in the cult are mostly “blood” rituals and dirty work.

She hikes her skirt to hide stains, since she needs to hike it for work anyway.

I’m not going to write much about Killer, since we should know less, at least at the start. He doesn’t come from a noble family, but ended up serving at the palace as a young man, at some point his job becoming to pour the drinks. When the king died prematurely, and his throne was taken, the new monarch sponsored Killer’s education and many of his trips around the land as a kind of ambassador, but mostly as a scholar. His latest studies led him to the origin town of the myth of the Tree of Feelings, to play a guest to some nobleman who wanted to live farther from politics. He’s the one who first developed his beliefs based on the scriptures and documents and stories he found, and the only one of the three to be able to read them. He preaches the cult, writing & reading out their texts, and knowing the most about the God they pray for.

There’s also Dream and Nightmare (and Blue), but I’m tired, haven’t eaten, and I have too much to talk about, plus this post is too long already…

#I never tag long posts but beware #I know u were joking about unleashing my demons. but that was scarily accurate.#tw transphobia #implied but still #utmv #cult au #the pictures are stuff I already drew u just gave me an excuse to show them btw #<- another proof my sanity hangs on by a thread called ‘utmv cult au but also its in the early 1800s’#nightmare sans #dreamtale #dreamtale au #horror sans #horrortale #dust sans #dusttale #killer sans #something new #my writing #my art

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draconifay · 2 months

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I just found out puppychan is on tumblr now under a different username and ngl, the whole situation with them just feels so....conflicting

On one hand a lot of the shit they did is straight up awful and stuff that should not be excused (endangering minors / innappropriate interactions with them, that racefaking incident they had for a bit 💀, the constant suicide baiting, among many other things)

But on another I just feel...man. i can't help but feel bad for him. I followed him when Antoonz was directing his bigoted ass audience towards him when he was still a minor, and all the ableist, racist, transphobic and straight up violent shit that was thrown Puppychan's way was genuinely awful - ESPECIALLY at such a young age. (I still remember the lynching art someone made on the day of his 18th birthday...ugh.) Not to mention it feels like the internet was kinda the only coping mechanism he had, and a really unhealthy one at that. It's very clear the internet just fucked him up a lot from being exposed to so much shit at a young age.

Don't get me wrong - I'm still incredibly disgusted by the things he's done and I do think people should definitely be warned about his antics. But part of me feels just...sad - sad that this clearly unwell person needs help and has been through so much shit, and they've dug themself into a hole, and because people are constantly on their tail they dig even deeper into said hole. It's like the Chris-chan thing all over again.

I will never condone any of the harmful shit that he did, but I do still hope he someday leaves the internet, finds a proper support system and works on himself. (And learn to stop blaming his harmful actions on his mental health issues). Cuz the internet is the last place he should be right now.

#puppychan #tw csa mention #tw csa implied #tw grooming #racism #transphobia #tw lynching #ableism

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shieldofiron · 10 months

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Eddie looked down at the flyer in his hand for the one millionth time. At least that’s how it felt.

Coming to college had taken two years of work, picking up classes at the community college to raise his gpa and filling out what felt like hundreds of scholarship applications. But walking through this door felt somehow even harder.

He had been out in Hawkins. But he had wondered if maybe at College it would be better to be stealth. After all, high school had been a nightmare. For once he didn’t want to be “THE trans guy.”

Though according to Argyle, who had sat at the Gay Alliance table all through the fair, he was far from the only trans person at UCLA. And they had a weekly board game night. If it had been any other activity, Eddie would have run for the hills. But this… maybe he could do this.

“You coming in or-“ the guy stared at Eddie through the half open door.

He was pretty, blonde and sort of lean, with blue eyes and a tiny nose.

“Hey, sorry just getting my nerve up,” Eddie thrust out his hand, “I’m Eddie. I just transferred.”

The guy only stared in response.

“Haha,” Eddie fought down a nervous laugh, “Get it? Transferred.”

The guy paled, “I’m Jason.”

“Nice to meet you Jason.”

He gestured to let Eddie inside, blue eyes round and huge. Like he was scared or something. Maybe Eddie should have toned it down, worn something more lowkey.

But when he got inside that didn’t totally track. The one guy, Billy, was local and loud as they came, showing Eddie a picture of him and his mom who was apparently his best friend, a large dangly earring swinging from his ear. And Eden, a trans girl from Utah, was decked out in heavy goth.

So Eddie wasn’t sure what Jason’s issue was.

“So, why a board game night?” He asked. “Not that I’m complaining. I’m a huge game fan, I started my school’s D&D club.”

“Oh, that’s Mr. Treasurer’s thing,” Billy slapped Jason on the back, “Apparently he and his best friend used to play all the time before she unfortunately passed away.”

Jason’s eyes darted over Eddie’s face.

“Oh. I’m so sorry,” Eddie said.

“Can I talk to you in the hallway, Eddie?” Jason said, his voice almost too loud in the quiet room.

“Ok, sure?”

Out in the hallway, Jason closed the door behind them and leaned against it.

“Look,” he said, “You’re being really cool about this. But it’s one hundred percent okay with me if you want to go. I can tell Billy and Eden, or even organize the game nights without me. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. But for what it’s worth… I’m really fucking sorry, Eddie.”

Eddie was mystified, “What?”

“I’m really fucking sorry. I was so… I hated myself so much, I regret that it made me act out in anger, and I’m… I am so sorry,” Jason said it so earnestly, so sure of something that he’d done wrong but Eddie still didn’t understand.

“Wait, what do you mean? Why would I feel uncomfortable with you?”

“For what I did,” Jason’s eyes looked a little red, and he hunched in closer to himself, folding his arms across his preppy polo, “When I was Jasmin.”

Oh.

Fuck.

Jasmin Carver had made Eddie’s life a living hell in high school. Teasing him constantly, pushing him away from Chrissy, who had actually seemed to like Eddie. Until Chrissy had died senior year, and Jasmin had gone off to college never to return.

Apparently Jasmin was never coming back.

Eddie sucked in a breath, “Oh.”

“You didn’t… recognize me?” Jason looked up, a single tear sneaking out of one eye that he swiped away on his shoulder.

“No,” Eddie said.

“Oh.” Jason nodded, then shook his head, staring at the carpet.

If Eddie ever imagined meeting him again it was never like this. But there was something awful about it too.

He hadn’t been the only trans guy in Hawkins. But because of the way Jason had acted… they had both been alone.

“I’m not out…” Jason sniffed, “No, I guess it would be fair if you outed me back home. I guess I deserve that.”

“What? I’m not gonna do that.”

“It’s fine,” Jason rubbed his eyes, “My parents are mad enough I’m actually taking anti-psychotics instead of just eating broccoli. Might as well just burn that bridge.”

Jason looks up, “But thanks, for being nice. Billy and Eden know that I was totally fucked up in high school. But it was nice. To pretend that… you liked me. Thank you.”

Eddie’s mouth worked before his brain could catch up, “But I can stay right?”

“What?”

“I can stay? If I want?”

“Yeah,” Jason smiled then, and Eddie realized why he hadn’t recognized him. Jasmin Carver had never smiled, not once.

It was a good thing, because it seemed Jasmin Carver was dead. Also, he wasn’t but…

“I’d really like that,” Eddie smiled back. “It’s really nice to meet you Jason.”

Jason sucked in a breath, “it’s nice to meet you too.”

—-

Pst @intothedysphoria it’s them!

#trans jason carver #trans eddie munson #munver #tigerfreak ficlet #tigerfreak #it’s t4t munver #jason x eddie #Eddie x Jason #unrequited? only time will tell #college au #tw ableism #tw transphobia implied

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aftgficrec · 4 days

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Some fic with andreil kids, i need that to survive

Our most recent ask for this has all of our previous recs. Enjoy! -A

latest ask:

Andreil & kids here

Kevin and his dads by Monsterputt03 [Not Rated, 646 Words, Complete, 2023]

Kevin's life with Andreil as his parents.

Want by TheBreadWinner [Rated G, 19938 Words, Incomplete, Updated May 2024]

Andrew and Neil are finally in a position without worries. They have a nice home, money, and dream jobs. What more could they want? Their closest friends and family are raising kids and experiencing something Andrew never pictured wanting. Now, in his thirties, he sees families everywhere: in the stands during games, at the park during his runs with Neil, and in the lobby of New York Presbyterian. Andrew knows what he wants, and he wants it with Neil.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse and neglect, tw: implied/referenced torture

you got the heart without the ache. by PatientIsTheNight [Rated G, 2483 Words, Complete, 2024]

[Andrew] cannot kill every abuser in the world, though it would be nice. More importantly, he knows that he cannot allow himself to be visibly angry, or upset - it would give the wrong idea. He isn’t angry at Kylie, after all, and refuses to give her even half of an inkling of that idea. But he is still angry, in the way a wounded animal is. It takes more than he thought it would to keep himself from hiding in corners and lashing out. - Andrew and Neil foster their first kid, and face how hard it is. It’s a kidfic, you know what you’re getting.

tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced child abuse

Whose Your Daddy Series by chaoticas_hell [Not Rated, Collection, Incomplete, Updated June 2024]

Part 1: Whose Your Daddy [47865 Words, Complete] Andrew Joseph Minyard didn't do regrets. But letting Neil in, allowing himself to want, for letting Neil slip through his fingertips- it was the closest he would get to feeling regret. It had been fourteen years since he last saw Neil, since Neil was taken right from under his grasp by his psycho-killer father and lost forever and Andrew had to make peace with that, had to stop expecting Neil to walk through his front door like he had never left. Except, one day, it all but happened. One day, a small kid with horribly cut short platinum blonde hair, striking blue eyes that plagued Andrew's dreams and nightmares, freckles and an achingly familiar horrible fashion sense showed up at his office door with the strangest question. "Are you Andrew Joseph Minyard, yes or no?" The kid asked in a British accent. Andrew could only nod. "Oh good." The kid said, suddenly unsure of themself. "Cause I think you're my dad." What the fuck?

tw: assumed major character death, tw: implied/referenced torture

Part 2: The Before [11385 Words, Incomplete, Updated June 2024] basically a sequel to my fic Whose Your Daddy taking a look at how Neil dealt with single parenthood, how Andrew faired after Neil's faked death, Jo's abysmal childhood, and judgmental family members

tw: assumed major character death, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: violence, tw: choking, tw: unplanned pregnancy, tw: transphobia, tw: gender dysphoria

Fragments of Light series by DarkD [Rated G/T, Collection, 2 complete works, Updated Jan 2023]

Part 1: Baby mine [T, 18609 Words, Complete, 2022] Andrew could practically see the image of Neil sleeping on his chest, one of the pairs of shoes he'd bought still lying there in bed with them. Neil looked so peaceful, Andrew couldn't stop looking at him. His hand was right on Neil's belly, he could almost imagine what the girls' heartbeats were like there. Neil had sung a song that night, and Andrew memorized every note because, someday, he would also sing that same song for Neil and his daughters. (They couldn't) be more wanted, they've probably never wanted anything more in their life. “You won't touch any of them again.” Andrew said. His voice was low and his throat hurt. “You're not getting anywhere near my fucking family.”

tw: gun violence, tw: attempted murder, tw: major character injury, tw: blood, tw: unplanned pregnancy, tw: transphobia, tw: self harm, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: destructive thoughts, tw: vomit

Part 2: My dear Nebula [G, 10086 Words, Complete, 2023] “Andrew, Andrew.” Neil whispered in his ear, the warm air against his skin making him shiver. “It's time for our nebula.” ... Neil then asked what a nebula was and he replied: Nebulae were nurseries for stars. Birth of stars. Birth… “Fuck”

tw: unplanned pregnancy, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced murder

Retired by IKnowWhoYouAre_Damianos [Rated G, 1855 Words, Complete, AFTG Summer Exchange 2022]

Neil turned 35 two months ago and was finally ready to retire. A vacay will be just the right thing for his restless mind.

Neil Loves Dinosaurs series by infernalstars [Rated G/T, 32616 words, 17 Complete Works, Updated 2020]

Part 1 recced here

Part 4: Asking For Help [1501 Words] In which Kevin Day has to shift his perspective on things and he seeks out Neil for help.

tw: ableism, tw: implied/referenced abuse

Part 5: Babysitting and the Conditions of Love [1492 Words] Neil and Andrew babysit for Matt and Dan

tw: transphobia, tw: self harm

Part 6: To Live in Peace [908 Words] Meet Henry!

tw: homophobia, tw: implied/referenced child abuse

Part 7: Nightmare [2149 Words] Andrew bonds with his foster kid.

tw: graphic nightmares, tw: implied/referenced murder

Part 8: Family [1491 Words] Henry comes home to Neil having a breakdown.

tw: homophobia, tw: ableism

Part 9: Again (Family pt. 2) [2034 Words] in which Neil has a chance to bond with his kid

tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: nonconsensual kissing

Part 10: Again (Family pt. 3) [1604 Words] The Resolution

tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: implied/referenced nonconsensual kissing, tw: implied/referenced nonconsensual drug use

Part 11: Ruby Red [1910 Words] Adopting one kid was always apart of the plan, but another kid...? Unplanned.

Part 12: Second Chances [3329 Words] in which Neil tells Ruby how him and Andrew met

Part 13: Roses and Thorns [1943 Words] Andrew is happy ft. some twinyards, catching up with Kevin and his daughter and a lil snippet of Liam!!

tw: implied/referenced self harm

Part 14: Something Real [3140 Words] How Andrew finds out Neil's Autistic.

tw: nonconsensual drug use, tw: nonconsensual kissing, tw: implied/referenced child abuse

Part 15: Conditions of Love [2104 Words] A mini series that explores Liam Wilds (Matt and Dans kid), his life and his relationship with Henry Josten-Minyard.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: transphobia

Part 16: Anniversary [1180 Words] The anniversary of the death of Neil's mom brings up some unpleasant memories and Andrew bring him to the museum to comfort him.

The Josten-Twinyards hc by @detectivebambam [Tumblr, 2024]

Andreil daughter and the word “please” by @starrycassi [Tumblr fic, 2024]

the monsters having kids with cool uncles andreil hc by @the-inner-musings-of-a-worm [Tumblr, 2024]

Miles Minyard-Josten age 7 fandom fun post by @andrews-jort-loving-pipe-dream [Tumblr, 2020]

Art

Minyard-Josten siblings also here art by @allfortheslay25

Nicky meeting Asher Minyard-Josten comic by @riceballannie

Andreil with Michael art by @dshr-art, hc here

fanart by @bluetheking for ‘Noah Minyard-Josten,’ fic recced here

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nerves-nebula · 1 year

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oh yeah btw Leo isn't the only one who behaves shittily. this is an abusive household baby, everyone's an asshole sometimes >:)

I think that when they're like, around 10-14 years old, if Mikey or Raph caught Leo doing anything Gender-Fuckery they'd definitely hold it over his head and mock him for it.

Not their best move, yes, but they're abused kids in a household where Leo's at the top of the hierarchy. they'll take whatever leverage they can get, even if its a low blow.

I think Raph would laugh at him and make snide remarks, but Mikey would be way more intentionally cruel as payback for all the bullying Leo gets up to.

the only one who wouldn't say anything is Donnie, and that's cause Donnie's trans himself, and has done extensive research into theories of gender. so he's more informed and less inclined to be an asshole about gender stuff. but he sees what raph & mikey say and it's,,, not a fun time for him either haha.

#nnstuff #transphobia tw #<- once again just kinda implied #teenage mutant neglected turtles

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thedo0zyslider · 3 months

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I Love You (I'm Not Supposed Too) - Chapter Six: Secrets Kept No More - 4k Words

Fwhip finally finds out what Jimmy wanted to say all those months ago.

A03 Link

The next few days in the Ocean Empire were pretty routine. And boring. Every day is almost the same, save for a few moments when he and Jimmy would either sneak away together, or they got too tired of each other's presence and retreated to their chambers for a few hours. Other than that, they would wake up, and head to the Cod Empire to do whatever needed done. Helping a whole group of people properly establish themselves was a lot of work, work Fwhip hadn’t signed up for. But he helped anyways, because there was nothing else to do, not really.

The work was pretty standard, all things considered. They helped people get back on their feet, did boring government stuff Fwhip always zoned out on, like he did at home, built things, helped with the farms, and sometimes they were even put on babysitting duty. Though the half dragon wasn’t very trusted in that department for a few obvious reasons. Mainly the bigotry and his usual impulsiveness, but he didn’t mind. Fwhip was never a big fan of kids anyways. And then, at the end of the day, when the little tasks were done, they headed back to the Prisma Palace for dinner and whatever the Ocean Queen wanted them to do. If she wanted anything.

The half dragon is given a guest room, one with a giant, plush bed and a lot of decor on the wall. Merfolk liked to line their homes with shell and other such trinkets, as he’d come to notice, and the guest rooms were no exception. Just like the rest of the palace, his room was also very pink and blue and white. Fwhip thinks he could go his whole life without seeing this color palette ever again, and be perfectly content.

One morning, maybe a week or so into the trip, the future Count awakens earlier than normal. He doesn’t know why, but he does know the sun is streaming through his room’s window; meaning he should get out of bed pretty soon. He has a feeling the queen doesn’t take lightly to oversleepers, even if he had helped carry loads of stone and wood and whatnot around the swamp all yesterday and probably needed the extra rest. But whatever, her house, her rules, the ginger supposed.

He dresses in his normal attire, minus the black coat. He hates taking it off, but less layers means he won’t get as sweaty. Especially since he does manual labor most of the day, or a lot of walking. Fwhip was used to extreme heat in the forge, not the humidity of a swamp in the summertime. Also, it’s just less fabric to get all muddy and gross. His poor boots though will need to be deep cleaned when he’s home, all the shoes he brought with him will. It feels like there’s water permanently in the leather nowadays, even when there’s not.

But that’s not the focus right now. The focus is getting ready and then getting breakfast. Ocean cuisine was a little….unusual for his tastes, but he did like a few of the dishes. Disturbing meals including both salmon and cod aside. Thankfully those weren’t usually served at breakfast, so he could avoid them until dinner or lunch time most days. Usually .

Fwhip steps out of his door a few minutes later, right after he finishes his morning routine…..and realizes he doesn't have a clue where the dining hall would be in this gigantic place. He ate there for dinner the previous night, but this place is so huge compared to the Manor. He has no idea how to even get back there, despite having a small tour when he arrived. Also, it would feel very awkward walking in without Jimmy.

He mumbles something to himself, grumpy from another bad night of sleep. It was hard to get any rest with waves constantly roaring all night long. His sleep deprivation, which was worse than normal, was probably making the whole trip more unpleasant than it actually was. The Ocean and its Empire were quite pretty, one had to admit, and the half dragon was sure he’d enjoy it more if it would let him sleep .

The ginger walks down to Jimmy’s room as he grumbles, the only place in the Palace he’s somewhat sure of the location of. That and his guest room. Mostly because they are in close proximity to each other, likely done on purpose, and because they’re the two most important rooms he passes every evening. He thinks he’s figured out where the library (the above water one) is though. He thinks.

He finds the Prince’s room, with less struggle than he had a few days ago. Fwhip only turned the wrong corner a few times! Yesterday he’d done that like, six or seven, so, progress! And while he’s never really…..knocked on Jimmy’s door, he knows the other is awake around this time. The cod had woken him up from a restless sleep far too often, enough that was decently familiar with the others' general sleep shedulce. Visiting him real quick would be fine , especially if he got breakfast at the end of it.

Fwhip opens the door, and he really, really should've knocked. He opens the door to a shirtless Jimmy, presumably in the middle of changing, and it takes the half dragon a good minute of shocked staring to realize that a binder is covering his chest. Jimmy whips his head around to face him, some kind of fear clearly in his gaze. The future Count kinda wants to punch himself for being so stupid.

Once he has that realization, the half dragon feels himself start to fumble out of embarrassment. “Oh, shit , sorry —I didn’t know you were-" He stumbles over his words, feeling a blush start to creep up his face. He politely keeps his gaze on the floor, his hand searching for the doorknob once again. The young prince is not having any of this, and the half dragon can’t really blame him.

“Just leave, okay!?” The cod snaps at him, and Fwhip listens to this guy for what has to be one of the first times ever. He ducks his head back out as soon as he finds the knob again, closing the door behind him with a rather loud slam. Silently, he slides down against the nearest wall, and resists the urge to scream into his own hands. That had been mortifying for him, making that big of a mistake. He can’t even imagine how Jimmy must feel right now, being seen like that. Being seen in what has to be some kind of vulnerable moment, by someone he certainly doesn’t want to be vulnerable with.

He sits there, slumped against the wall for a few minutes; hands running over his face and through his now messy hair. The future Count isn't really sure what to do after…. that . Mainly there are just a lot of things going through Fwhip's head as he sits there. He's pretty flustered, not ever intending to do that, and is sure a fierce blush is currently coating his face. Part of him knows it might be better that he leaves, because Jimmy will very understandably be scared to next confront him. The other part doesn't feel right just leaving. He feels like he needs to apologize. No, Fwhip wants to apologize. He feels bad, which certainly is a new emotion around the young cod.

The castle is still quiet, and it seems their little encounter hadn't disturbed anyone, thank god. Fwhip didn't want their screaming to accidentally out Jimmy to anyone else, for he had already heard some terms the staff used towards the prince. No servants have even begun moving towards the hall yet, and no footsteps can be heard in the distance. The Ocean Empire has rather quiet mornings, as opposed to the Grimlands rather loud and explosive ones. Which is good right now, he supposes. A quiet castle gives you more time to regain your bearings.

There is some shuffling by the door, and the doorknob starts to turn once again. Fwhip, still pretty stricken by the whole ordeal despite his best efforts, looks up in surprise. His suitor doesn't emerge instantly, taking his time to fully leave his bedroom. But when he does, the sight only makes the half dragon feel even more guilty.

Jimmy slowly shuffles out, his bedroom door being shut quietly behind him. Probably not to disturb anyone else in any nearby rooms, if there are any. He's finished changing, now wearing a green tunic. Not a skintight one like merfolk usually wore, but one that was clearly meant for a bigger person. One clearly meant to hide things, Fwhip would now notice. He suspects it isn’t the first time Jimmy has denied his species traditional attire in front of him, and probably won't be the last. The cod's face is red, his eyes puffy, and a weak frown painting his face. Fwhip feels a sinking feeling in his stomach at the thought of Jimmy crying because of him and his dumb mistake.

"Are you okay?" He asks, meeting the others' gaze tentatively. The future Count has no idea if the other is angry at him and, for once, wouldn't blame him if he was.

"I'm fine." Jimmy says, and it is clearly a lie. He's shaking, and leaning on the wall for support. Like he'll collapse and break down if he doesn't do so. It's not hard to believe that he will, either.

"You're shaking, and your eyes are red." Fwhip points out, scanning over the blonde's face. He's been crying his eyes out, that much is clear. So much so that if Lizzie were to walk by, she'd probably punch the future Count on the spot.

"Why do you care?" The cod asks, slumping down next to him. He's even surprised Jimmy wants to sit next to him after that, but he lets it happen anyway. They sit a few inches apart, not enough to touch, but not far enough to feel fully awkward. It's just enough space for the time being.

"Because I'm not stupid. I know what I just did." Fwhip says, feeling a frown stretching onto his face the longer this conversation goes on. He doesn't like the tone the other has, whatever it is. It's upsetting.

Jimmy forces a smile, and lets out a broken sounding laugh. “Well, didn’t want you to see my boobs. But you were gonna one day I guess, since the mar-”

“Don’t.” Fwhip cuts him off, running a hand over his face again. “Please don’t joke about….any of that stuff, okay? Not a good time.” It will come to concern Fwhip slightly, the kind of self hating jokes Jimmy makes about the marriage and himself. Because he'll make more in the future, and the half dragon will have to knock the habit out of him he supposes. “Also, not really our thing.”

“Sorry. Sorry. I know, bad joke. I’m just…a little upset.” The cod mumbles, hanging his head a bit. Not in shame, just lingering embarrassment. Fwhip feels a wrong sort of feeling settling in his stomach, and frowns. “And yeah…that’s not our thing.”

“I know….you’re probably upset.” He says, wholly sincere with Jimmy. Probably for like, the second time ever if he’s being honest. Because he would hate himself if he was anything but sincere under today’s circumstances. They were far too serious for his usual attitude. "Sorry about walking in without knocking or anything…I won’t do it again."

Jimmy takes a moment to respond, the back of his head hitting the wall with a dull thunking sound. "It's fine, really. You were gonna find out eventually. Probably. I just wanted it to be under…different circumstances is all."

Fwhip hums, and wraps his tail around his legs. It had been awkwardly laying on the floor before now, and it was…..strangely comforting to wrap it around himself. Even though he wasn't the one who needed comfort right now. "Sorry about that too."

"Not the worst thing in the world." Jimmy hums, watching his movement. He seems like he's zoning out a little bit, his mind wandering elsewhere. To other things and other trains of thoughts, more troubling ones probably.

"I kinda already knew. Thought I should mention that." Fwhip hums, glancing away to stare at the wall. He doesn't want to see Jimmy’s face when he responds, whatever that response may be.

"Oh?" Is all the cod responds with. He sounds…curious, and only that. Thankfully. Fwhip didn't know if the other would've been angered by that or whatever.

He glances back at Jimmy when he explains it, and is met with a look of slight curiosity. Which is fair, to Jimmy’s credit, he passes very well. Fwhip is just very good at noticing details. “When they told us about the marriage, our parents called you a princess and stuff. And the staff have been too. I just didn't want to assume anything, y'know?"

"Yeah, my mom's probably the reason for that. I didn't take them for… that type of person." The blonde nods, taking the others' explanation into consideration for a moment. The ginger would pay so much money to know what's running through his head right now.

"No, they're not like that." Fwhip confirms, briefly thinking back on his parents. Despite whatever way they might have failed him and his sister before, they had always been nothing but supportive of their children's identities. One of the few good qualities they both shared, if they shared any at all. "I could mention it to them….?"

The offer is said tentatively, but Jimmy looks so incredibly relieved at hearing it. "Please." He says, and Fwhip nods. He cannot help but wonder what hell this boy has been living through for so long, to be so relieved when even the most basic decency is shown to him.

“Sorry about how we left things, when you were forgotten at the manor. By the way.” The half dragon adds, somehow remembering to say sorry for that. Take that , memory issues. “I was just….I was starting to guess and didn’t know how to ask you.”

“It’s okay..” Jimmy says, trying to crack a smile. It's weaker than he would probably like it to be, but it's a start. Fwhip grins back, and neither of them have anything more to say. Not immediately, at least.

“You don’t…have a problem with it do you?” Jimmy nearly whispers the question into the silence. They've been sitting in quiet for a few minutes, and Fwhip had grown content to stare at the Palace's prismarine walls until one of them decided to move again.

Fwhip tilts his head to the side curiously, a little scared of what the other is about to ask. “With what?”

“With me being….with me having girl stuff. And you having to marry that. ” Jimmy spits out some of the words with such venom, that Fwhip is shocked by it. He feels a surprising wave of pity wash over him, for this boy he hates so much, and it's the first time ever he has to stop himself from hugging the young cod.

“No, I don’t. Why the hell would I?” He says, like it is the easiest thing to say. Because it is. To the blonde it's something he never expected to hear.

“Oh…” Jimmy sounds…..so genuinely surprised at his answer. “It’s just…some people would. Some people do. ”

“Those people suck.” His answer is spit out in an instance, full of more passion than he thought was possible. Those people do suck. They suck a lot .

“Yeah.” Jimmy agrees meekly, hesitantly slumping down and resting his head on the half dragon's shoulder. Fwhip lets him do so, not caring that a merfolk is touching him right now. He needs it a lot right now, he figures.

They sit in the silence for a few seconds once more, in the white and blue hallway of the Prisma Palace. Two people who should, and do, hate each other, but aren't really acting like it. They haven't had the energy to act like it for a while, Fwhip thinks, with how shit everything is. How the world constantly throws terrible things at the both of them and expects the boys to just cope . That's what it feels like, anyways.

Maybe it'll be better when they're older.

"You do know you're not the only one of us who's like that, don't you?" Fwhip mumbles, his cheek now resting against the blonde's head. He doesn't know how long they've been in the hallway, but the palace hasn't started its normal routine yet. So he guesses it can't have been too long. Maybe one of the maids or cooks will find them, and ask why in the bloody hell two royals are sitting in a dirty hallway, cuddling.

Jimmy gets a little excited, as told by his tail smacking the wall a few times before he realizes it's moving. "No…?"

"Well, Xornorth’s nonbinary, and Sausage is pretty gender nonconforming.” Fwhip says, trying to remember everyone who's come out so far. He doesn't know all their labels, if some people have any, but he tries his best to get them right. “And Shrub isn't entirely a girl."

"Oh…I didn't know that." Jimmy hums, sounding happier than he had before. The half dragon briefly wonders if, when the thirteen of them are together again, that a labels debrief would make some people feel more included.

"None of us are straight either, I don’t think." Fwhip might’ve not been up to date on all the labels, but he was pretty sure of that fact. That their whole group were all horribly not straight in some way, some more obviously than others.

Jimmy lets out an amused snort at that. "Of course." That's the right phrase for it really, of course . Of course all the royal children are queer as hell. Of course most of their parents suck too. How else would it be with their little group?

"Why're you being so nice to me over this?" The cod adds on after a moment, cautious, and has every right to be so.

Fwhip resists the urge to roll his eyes, and spits out the honest truth. He really wonders if Jimmy thought that lowly of him before, say, maybe twenty to thirty minutes ago. The half dragon wouldn’t be surprised if he did, not after everything. "I don't like you and I think you're annoying as hell, but I'm not cruel ."

"Thanks for that, I guess." Jimmy mumbles, sounding shocked and surprised again. Fwhip hears that tone, he’s heard it too many times today, and truly starts to wish the world would be kinder to this poor fishboy. Sans himself and his very justified hatred, of course.

"Don't thank me for treating you like a human being." The half dragon snorts, and fixes Jimmy with a look . He’s pretty sure the meaning of it goes right over the blonde’s head, too. The utter idiot “And we have that truce, remember? No being assholes ‘till we’re hitched?”

“Yeah…the truce. Almost forgot about that.” Jimmy mumbles, sounding a little thoughtful once again. Maybe he’s been full of thoughts this whole time, and Fwhip’s just shit at noticing. Or he’s running out of words to describe the cod, because they have never interacted like this before. He has a very limited vocabulary when it comes to describing Jimmy. Today he is running out of words he hasn’t used, and also adding new ones. “We’re not good at following it, are we?” Jimmy keeps talking, and Fwhip barely hears him, lost in his own thoughts it seems. He hated how easy that was to do.

(Adding new ones like sad , and mistreated , and stressed , and traumatized and a whole bunch of other words he has no more room for in the half dragon’s never ending whirlwind of a mind.)

“No, but I like to think we’ve gotten better.” He mumbles out a response, taking a few precious seconds to clear his head. They’ve certainly gotten better, or at least more tolerable of each other’s presence, because Fwhip isn’t pinning Jimmy into a wall and holding him hard enough to bruise anymore. They had to have gotten better, because his mental health hasn’t. Both of their have probably gotten worse over the years, actually.

“We have to be. Because they’re all buying it. Every single one of them.” Jimmy says, and it’s the most confident he’s sounded in a while, and will sound all day. He also sounds more than a little scared, and Fwhip can’t help but share the sentiment a bit.

“Good. Good.” He mumbles, and doesn’t want to admit that he feels some of the same fear. They are going along with this whole thing out of fear, it’s the whole reason why they’re even sitting here in the first place. Fear of judgment, of failure of duty, of disappointment. Of what their parents would say. Even if they don’t really talk about it, both of them know that’s what’s happening. Body language always says a lot more than both the boys wish it would.

Jimmy changes the topic back to their earlier, less daunting one. It seems a lot still weighs on his mind, which is to be expected with a situation and life like this. "I want to get…the surgery for it, but, ah.…my mum won't let me.."

"Well, maybe you can get it before the wedding….?" Fwhip threw out the suggestion lightly, and gave a small shrug of his shoulders. Before the wedding was a vague timeframe. Realistically, that could be as soon as they’re both legal adults, or within the next five years. But it was a time frame that they could aim for, and that was better than nothing. And if Jimmy's mom wouldn’t let him get that surgery, than Fwhip would be the one throwing him in front of the healers instead, shitty parents be damned.

He’d really had enough of shitty parents recently.

"Hmph, maybe…" Jimmy mumbles. He hopes the sound in the other’s voice is hope, faux or real. They need some positive emotions right now, he’s already feeling emotionally drained from the guilt and the shame and whatnot. It’s not even seven in the morning, either.

“The truce extends to that too, by the way.” Fwhip adds, nudging the others shoulder with his own. He feels a grin start to bloom on his face. One of his shit-eating ones that always makes Gem groan and Sausage mirror it.

The cod gives him a confused look, his face scrunching up with the feeling. He’s not despondent anymore, so that’s a win for Team Fwhip! Sadly the only win today, but he might get some more as the hours wear on, especially if he keeps this attitude up. “Whaddya mean?”

“That means if someone’s being a transphobe, I get to deck them in the face. Even when we're married.” Fwhip explains, his grin getting larger. He does one of his normal hand gestures as he speaks, like he does with all his other explanations. Jimmy, well accustomed to the half dragon’s quirks, pays it no mind.

“Even my mum?” Jimmy asks, and sounds a little stupid when he does.

Fwhip nods, and feels tension unknot itself and leave the cod’s body from where they’re still pressed together. “Even your mom.”

“Heh, thanks.” Jimmy giggles, eventually having to muffle the laughter with his hand after a few minutes. Aannddd that’s two wins for team Fwhip, all within a minute or so of the last one. He better savor these — and this rare companionship with Jimmy — while the moment allows and before their normal bickering starts up once again.

“Again, don’t thank me.” Fwhip shrugs again, his tail finally uncurling from around himself. He doesn’t need any comforting measures, not immediately anyways. The tense and upset mood from earlier is long gone, now replaced with something lighter, even if both the royal’s hearts are still heavy with a lot of things.

“Force of habit, being polite is.” The cod says, his own tail swishing dully against the floor. It’s good to see he’s cheered up, and not crying anymore. And also not having to think about all the terrible treatment he receives. It’s good.

“So I’ve noticed.” Fwhip snorts, watching as the other starts to stand up. Jimmy gives all his limbs a stretch, since they’re still probably stiff from the night’s rest, and then holds a hand down to the other boy. The half dragon takes it without any complaint, or grumbles under his breath about having to touch a fish. Jimmy just helps him up, and it's probably the most simple yet complex interaction they’ve ever had. To date, anyways.

The Prince then starts to move down the hallway, past his door to where Fwhip thinks the dining hall is. The dining hall and a million other passageways and rooms he can’t remember. Dumb castles and their dumb, beautiful architecture. “Let’s go get breakfast, or something.”

“And where are we going after that?” The ginger follows behind, already mentally preparing himself for another six or more hours of helping the dumb cod people out. Him and Jimmy might be cool for today, but that doesn’t mean he suddenly likes all that mud and grime the swamp carries. Jimmy hums, sounding a little cheeky, and like he has his own shit-eating grin now smeared across his face. “Well, mom never said we had to be in the Cod Empire today. I was just scheduled there for three days this week…”

“So we’re getting a free day?” Fwhip thinks everything about him visibly lights up, from his voice to his demeanor. The mere thought of a free day, of finally being able to hide in his guest room, or the castle’s library, or wherever this dumb kingdom invented stuff, was enough to make his tail wag slightly. Anything, literally anything , but the horrible swamps and gross water again was going to make him beam.

“Basically, yeah.” Jimmy confirms, turning a corner without even thinking. Fwhip envy's everyone who has the dumb Palace mapped out already, and doesn’t struggle getting around. So he basically envies everyone who lives there.

“Finally, time away from you.” The ginger huffs, gloved hands being shoved in his coat pockets. He tries to commit the winding corridors to memory again, and hopes it goes a little better this time.

“Finally.” Jimmy agrees, right as they reach the dining hall for breakfast. Either they walked really fast for some reason, or Fwhip’s memory of the place truly is horrible. He never thought it was that close to the bedrooms. But hey, they’re not serving fried salmon for breakfast again today, so as long as that keeps happening, he won’t complain about the proximity to food. Especially if a free day follows after it. He rarely ever gets free days, here or at home There’s always something, some project or dumb responsibility thing, to do. But now he’s finally getting one after what has to be months , maybe even years.

Maybe his stay in the Ocean won’t be so bad after all.

#ron.writing #jimmy solidarity #ron.fic #empires smp #fwhimmy #fwhip #tw transphobia #tw self harm #<- implied #ily (im not supossed too)#empiresfic #empires jimmy #empires fwhip #this is the shortest chapter yet i thinkk

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