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vanishingcherry · 8 months

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YN YLN and Charles Leclerc Take a Couples Quiz

pairing: charles leclerc x reader

author's note: this has been in my drafts for wayy to long, so ive decided to just finish it off and post it. im sorry lmao but i just couldn't watch this rot away in my wips any longer.

masterlist

๑ ⋆˚₊⋆────ʚ˚ɞ────⋆˚₊⋆ ๑

The video cut to you and Charles, sitting opposite each other in front of a yellow to red gradient, smiling at the camera.

"Hi! I'm YN", you say cheerfully.

"And I'm Charles"

"And we are here to take a couples quiz!"

You are handed a stack of questions from a person off screen, and turn towards Charles.

"Are you ready?"

"Is that the first question?" he retorts.

Your face drops, now showing slight annoyance but there is still a small smile you try to hide. "That's it. Minus 1 points."

"Oh c'mon! That is not fair."

You turn to argue but the video cuts to a different scene in which you ask the actual first question.

"What things do I have, of yours, that are my favourite?

He looks up in thought before chuckling and replying. "Theres a lot, you steal my stuff all the time."

You grin. "Yes, but what's my favourite?"

"My shirts? No wait! My bracelets?" He asks.

"Yeah!" you exclaim. Turning to the camera you add. "He gets so many bracelets from fans and they are all so pretty. We keep them in a bowl on our dresser so I like to take a few whenever I go out."

Looking back at Charles, you add. "You didn't know the answer, but you still got it right so I think you deserve half a point." The staff behind the camera gives you a thumbs up, noting it down for when they would edit the video.

"Ok! Next question- which song of yours is my favourite?"

He looks at you, his eyes widening with a confused expression on his face. He looks at the camera crew and then back at you.

"C'mon, I only have 2 it's not a very hard question."

"Then answer it." you reply, looking at him with a small smirk.

"Fine. Uh, AUS23."

"Wrong!" you exclaim, laughing at the way his jaw drops in surprise.

"Then what? I know its not Miami."

"Its the one you wrote for Baku." you slyly say, knowing fully well that he hadn't released it and you were possibly the only one other than him to have heard it.

You look down at the cards you had been given, reading off the next question. "What is the first thing I eat in the morning?"

You see his smirk growing in your peripheral vision and cut in before he answers. "If you dare make a joke, I will murder you."

He laughs at that, chuckling as he looks up to think. "Um. Breakfast? It's different things every morning, but if I wake up before her then I make cereal."

Noticing the evident confusion on the faces of the cameramen, you elaborate. "It's the only thing he's allowed to make without me present. The last time I let him cook alone, he burned the pancakes and half our kitchen."

Turning red at the story, he interrupts. "Okayy, next question amore."

"Which side of the bed do I sleep on?"

"Left."

"If I could get a tattoo of something, what would it be?"

"A bouquet of flowers. The flowers would be your favourite and my favourite together."

You are shocked at his response. "How did you remember that? I told you that ages ago!"

He smiles slyly to the camera. "That is why I am the best boyfriend, there is no need for these silly questions I am already the best. She told me so in be-"

"Right. Next question." You cut him off, eyes widening as you figure out where he was going with the statement. "This is the last one. If I could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?"

"Oh this is easy. Italy. You are always talking about how much you love it. But you also love Monaco and France so depending on how you feel, one of those three."

"Well.", you look at the camera, "I think that answer deserves 2 points." Handing your questions off to the side, you turn to Charles who has started reading the first of his questions.

"If I had a ticket to anywhere in the world, where would I go?" he reads. "This is similar to yours", he mutters.

"Home", you say confidently. "He's a mama's boy, tries to go back home as much as possible."

He blushes slightly before nodding to the camera. "Yup, 1 point."

"What was I wearing on our first date?"

You reply quick as lightening. "A shirt and pants. Very gentlemanly, I remember thinking, probably the best first impression I've had of a guy."

His eyebrows raise at the confession, cockily tilting his head in the direction of the camera. "You heard her! Next, what is something I hate?"

"A lot of things, Char."

"Is that your final answer, cherie?"

"Um." you pause. "Oh I know! When manipulate stuff that you say. It makes me really mad too. It gets really tiresome when they take stuff that Charles has said that turn into into a different story altogether."

"Thats true, I do hate that." He smiles at you, reaching over to squeeze your hand once to say thank you.

"How many kids do I want?"

"3, because you have 2 siblings. But, you said you want as many as I am comfortable with!"

"Of course, amour. You're the one whose going to be carrying them, your choice is more important here. What is something I get annoyed about?"

"Oh, when Seb and Carlos beat you at those Ferrari games you play."

His jaw drops in faux offence, shaking his head as he reads out the last question on his cue card.

"What is one my hidden talents?"

You look straight at the camera, not dissimilar to The Office. A smirk grows on your face and the lens zooms in. In the background Charles can be heard complaining.

"Oh I see! You can make these jokes, but I cant?"

The video cuts to the wider angle once again, you and Charles wave at the camera.

"Thanks for watching our couples quiz! I think it's clear that I've won."

Charles rolls his eyes, eyes shining with admiration and love for you. "Bye everybody."

Comments:

charleslover: OH MY GOD!! THEY ARE SO IN LOVE IT KILLS ME

ynandcharles: their facial expressions always kill me

username89: where do i get a charles leclerc bcs i will willingly offer all the money i have

doratheexplorer16: their love for each other hurts

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silenthillmutual · 6 months

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do you mind expanding on why you don't like CBT? i'm just curious cause i also have various things wrong w me (including baaddd fatigue) & i've been doing cbt for like 6 months for anxiety :P

i don't mind! but there's not really a ton to my answer. i expect that a part of why cbt doesn't work for me is because my mother is a therapist who used cbt (and judging from some things she's said about my childhood, probably aba) with me growing up, and it just... didn't work. it never lessened my anxiety. back in undergrad i had a cbt workbook, thinking it would help me work through the problems i was having, but every time i tried to use it, it just made me more stressed out.

sort of related, but the apa's page on cbt starts off by talking about how it's the most effective for of treatment for pretty much everything, better than medication, but the page doesn't link to any studies about this and i'm not sure if thats something you even could objectively measure. but the idea that it's 'more effective than medication' for even 'severe mental illness' feels like complete bullshit to me, and i think it creates a bias in some therapists, as i felt discouraged from taking medications in the past.

i don't deny that cbt helps some people, but i also don't believe it's possible to simply problem-solve your way out of, for example, hypo/mania or even depressive episodes when youve got bipolar disorder. which is, i'm guessing, part of why it doesnt do shit for people with cfs. the idea that someone experiencing a flare up can rationalize their way into feeling better is utterly ridiculous. cbt is, i am fairly certain, the main treatment for ocd, but how is it supposed to help me when my borderline delusional brain has already rationalized both the obsessive thought and the compulsive behavior?

i agree with the central tenet that coping skills are important, but something about the way cbt has been used with me has consistently made me feel like it was my fault that my brain works the way it does, and whenever i bring up something that happened in the past i feel dismissed. ive literally been told by therapists that since i no longer live in a bad situation, i should no longer act like i do, despite having lived in that situation for 84% of my life. it just feels like a very 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps' approach to therapy that does not click with me at all.

regardless of my personal problems with it, i do hope it helps you, anon - and if it doesnt, i hope you find something that does! i think a lot of younger therapists are taking the approach to use a variety of therapies instead of sticking to just one. good luck!

#harker answers #idk how to tag this

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actualbird · 2 years

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how do you think giann-vyn and marius-vyn interactions differ? like vyn's thoughts on the brothers and etc.? if marius and giann were both over at vyn's how would they interact? one of my favorite hc rn is vyn sometimes having to force himself to remember that "Marius isn't Giann" whenever Marius does/says something Giann would do.

OHHHHH THIS IS SUCH AN INTERESTING ASK, I LOVE THISSSS and im especially glad i got this after i played marius' personal story 4 and i got that one giann crumb line from austin that i Cannot stop thinking about, this one

which REALLY made me rethink how i interpret my free-real-estate characterization of giann. and also uh...made me tangent into just a whole long response about some other stuff so

a headcanon post that got out of hand: vyn & giann vs. vyn & marius: similarities, loyalties, differences

wc: 1.5k (sorry, i didnt know this would get this long either)

like, okay, for starters, i do wanna talk about their similarities

it's already canon that giann has a playful prankster side to him just like marius does, shown in SSR Will Of The Trees where giann told tiny!marius his rash was from a poisonous plant and not just a common rash ajhksvjhfvaksKJGK. i rlly loved that bit, i think this is true for all von hagens, theyre all little shits

more on an hc side now though, i like to think marius and giann have a lot of smaller similarities in small habits simply by virtue of being siblings and small habits very easily crossover to one another. stuff like maybe they both fidget with pens in similar ways or they both have the tendency to focus v much on work or a task that they forget to sleep. what giann does, marius sees, and year after year some of those things he not only learns but ends up doing himself as well.

tiny aside related to above bullet point, i think theyd have similar ways of Talking. like, the cadence and word choice and stuff. this is wholly just cuz i myself have 3 siblings and we all talk with similar syntaxes jhavksjhfvkahjsfva

now, with those in mind, it's super obvious that either brother could remind another person of the other brother!

which......might be a sore spot for both vyn and marius during the Giann Is Missing era

for marius, well. i already spoke at length here and here about a possible inferiority complex that could totally mess him up if he lets it take root and grow

and for vyn.....ive been thinking a bunch about vyn's relationship with giann. like, in the whole brewing nxx civil war of team giann vs team neil (irt whos the bad guy! who sold out the other!) clearly marius is on team giann and artem is on team neil and vyn seems....largely neutral, fittingly playing the adjudicator before mc and luke join the team

but hes not neutral. cuz he Knew both neil and giann before they disappeared, the vyn-giann-neil trie Were the nxx team before the others came in (mentioned in main story 6.1 or 6.2, ive got a bad memory).

and with that in mind, vyn actually seems to have his loyalty towards a certain direction already: to the von hagens

vyn seems closer to giann and/or seems more aligned with the von hagens cuz

most obvious: //gestures at GIANNOVYN MENTAL HEALTH RESEARCH CENTER my god u guys rlly could not think of a better name but just mushing ur names together?? im never getting over that jkhvkajhsvfkjas

2nd most obvious: hes currently marius' tutor. honestly at this point i almost forgot about this bit, are they still having classes?? SO MUCH ELSE IS GOING ON RN FOR THEM AJHVFAJK

probably wasnt obvious at all but it has always been living in my mind rent free since september of last year: in the very first scene Mysteries of the Lost Gold where the team squabbles, vyn said he could easily just call austin if marius didnt wanna give him an invite to nosta. very funny moment, i love that bit so much. but also huh, vyn is close enough to austin von hagen that he can call the dude?? and it wasnt a bluff, becaue marius reacted in a way that implied vyn totally had the capability (and that marius didnt want it to happen). so vyn must have some kind of communication/acquaintance with austin that vyn could call about something completely unrelated (sidenote: this is hilarious now that i think about it. can you imagine being marius. ur tutor who is also ur work colleague who is also somebody ur kinda a bitch to and hes a bitch right back at you, this person can cALL UR DAD?? rip marius lol)

i went on a tangent there, i was sposed to focus on giann but then i zoomed out but YEAH. vyn has some level of closeness with the von hagens

and i think that started with giann

SO LIKE, working backwards....vyn moved to stellis in 2028. on The Same Year, he also co-founded the research center with giann.

and, my god, from a purely logistical standpoint, that was fast!! but from a trust standpoint, that was also fast irt vyn connecting with another person since we all know he can be a cagey motherfucker. so giann must have been one really frigging charming person to get vyn richter of all people to be his friend (at most) or trusted colleague (minimum)!!! and vyn, for all his elegance and stuff, seems like a very ride-or-die friend once he admits to himself that he is indeed attached somehow to another human being. ive got a bunch of hcs actually on how they met but thats for a fanfic writing day, not this post

anyway, why did i bring all that up? mostly cuz i forgot what i was writing about. BUT ALSO just to hammer home the emotional stake vyn may or may not have in the Giann Is Missing ordeal.

cuz like...being annoyed at marius for being too similar to giann is one thing. but being annoyed at marius for being too similar to giann who could have most probably been the first person vyn managed to connect with on some level (be it professional or a friendship thing) well...thats a whole Other Thing Altogether

anyway, the key difference between giann and marius thats already So Much to explore was already said. austin's line, "[Giann] is too kind and honest. He is not as rational as [Marius]. [Marius] knows how to hide his joys and frustrations."

(SIDENOTE: of course we, the players, know that marius is very kind and honest and shows his joys and frustrations. but he doesnt show that face at first, thats only reserved for people he trusts. for everybody else, marius acts in whatever way gets him the advantage. which...sound familiar? the marius that austin describes has a lot in similar with vyn. hides things to protect the self or others, rational and thinking, keeps the heart not on the sleeve but somewhere more guarded. those are vyn qualities as well as marius qualities. and the flipside is that giann (as described by austin) could very well have been vyn's opposite)

so now with all that laid down, let me finally answer your question HAHAHJKSDHFVJKDSHA

vyn's reactions to marius during the Giann Is Missing Era

upon meeting marius for the first time, i assume vyn's reaction would be a mix of relief and disdain. relief because ah, this one is like how vyn expects most people to be. but disdain because this one wears a similar face to somebody who mattered to vyn, and he is so different that it hurts. marius has giann's hair color, giann's eye color, sometimes marius talks like how giann would or would joke like how giann would. but marius still could not be any more different than giann. so in these early days, the separation between the two brothers is clear. theyre not the same person at all.

of course, as vyn and marius spend more time together, marius' mask chips away due to trust and the wonderful magic of friendship. and then things get more complicated. because at this point, vyn is much surer that marius is his own person thanks to all the team has been through, all vyn has witnessed of marius, and the such. and once marius is comfortable showing his own honesty and kindness in a less guarded way, it hurts all over again for vyn. he knows logically marius and giann are different people but god, the similarities would make vyn miss giann even more

how vyn's interactions differ

we already know how vyn interacts with marius (i.e. elegant roasting, respectful when it comes to work, vaguely annoyed whenever marius is indeed being annoying) so i move on

vyn and giann...now this is something ive got no canon basis for since we dont have any canon scene where vyn interacts with giann like in a flashback or something, but given that giann was a more open person who entered vyn's life earlier, i figure vyn wouldnt be as....thorny. maybe a little more honest, maybe a little more comfy as well to indulge in some of the playful shithead-ness giann has.

how vyn would react once giann is no longer missing and he and marius are in the same room

vyn's mind just goes:

two of them

as you can see i lost steam towards the end here JKHVKJSHFKDSJ but i hope something in this response was interesting to read. thank you for the ask, anon!! :D

#asks #anon #tears of themis #marius von hagen #vyn richter

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leorawright · 1 year

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Hello! Could i request a romantic tf2 matchup please?

-I’m a heterosexual/heteroromantic woman

-my pronouns are she/her

-im a Mexican woman who’s slowly gaining confidence in herself and her capabilities! Im pretty antisocial, but get very excited when I get to talk about a topic i love and enjoy extremely! I tend to have a hard time making friends, but deeply cherish the ones i do have. I try to be as creative as possible whenever i can, which includes trying to be more optimistic in my outlook on life. I tend to overthink a lot, but only to find different ways to get through a problem or situation. People have told me that I give off a very serious persona, even some telling me Im like their mom or even “45 years old”, but honestly i just have a different way of thinking. I tend to examine life though many means, either psychological, literal or spiritual, and often find myself lost in thought. Other than that, i just enjoy talking about my interests whenever i can and just trying to be a better person every day.

What i look for in a partner:

-i look for someone who listens to what im saying and feeling - meaning that they take my feelings to heart and actually listen instead of trying to fix the situation, putting in their own personal opinion as a way to fix the situation, trying to fix me, or just ignoring me in general.

-im a pretty sensitive person, so i want the kind of partner who compliments you when you do something right/are proud of instead of someone who will call you things like b*tch or something like that (its just not my kind of thing)

-i want someone i can trust and will apologize when they do something wrong instead of making an excuse to avoid the blame when deserved

-someone who will stand up for me and teach me how to stand up for myself when someone or something is trying to bring me down (basically a supportive bf)

-i have depression and anxiety, so i would love if they would find different ways to comfort me when im not at my best

-ive never been in a relationship before, so i want someone who will make me feel safe and secure with them as well as remind me that its ok to not know how to do things and help me when I feel embarrassed or ashamed of it

-i have many insecurities about my body, more specifically how people point out how skinny i am, my poor posture, messy hair, and especially how i never smile that much (its hard for me sometimes for some reason), so i want someone who will make sure i am loved in a way where I’ll actually learn to love myself step by step

-sometimes i feel like there’s always something preventing me from having someone like me romantically (either my personality, appearance, interests, etc), so i want someone who will make me feel loved no matter what im into or what i look like

My hobbies:

-i love to draw! Ever since the 5th grade, ive been drawing almost every day, specifically characters from tv as well as my own! I grew up always loving cartoons and animation, and hope to one day go to art school and hopefully get a career in animation! I specifically love 2d animation since i grew up with it and tend to adore movies and shows from the 1980’s-2000’s that show the different types of animation accomplished within those years.

-i love watching old cartoons from my childhood! Whether it be Hey Arnold, Invader Zim, or Spongebob, i always enjoyed watching the characters on screen, even becoming inspired to hopefully make my own animated series one day!

-ive been learning to sew stuffed animals and dolls for a few months now! Its been really fun trying to study different patterns and making my own little dolls of my favorite characters!

-i love Space! Although i dont know much about it anymore, its always fascinated me how beautiful the solar system can be. My favorite planet was always Jupiter, and whenever my family used to visit Mexico, I would be captured by the beautiful scene of stars dancing among the sky. It was as if it was so pretty that even merely touching the solar system would make you pretty too!

-i love to listen to music with basically everything i do. Whether it be drawing, getting ready for the day, going on a drive, or going into a store, im always playing music through my earbuds. It helps to calm me down, which is definitely needed for me. My favorite bands are Ninja Sex Party, j^p^n, Tom Lehrer, The Dreadnoughts, Shadow Academy, System of a Down, and Falling in Reverse to name a few!

-i like to listen to comfort audios every now and then. These are basically audios where your put yourself into a scenario with another person (aka “speaker x listener” format). These audios can range from “slice of life” and “domestic settings” to things like “talking with your local barista” and even “alien saves you from your dying planet”. It can get pretty creative, and can honestly bring great comfort when i need it most!

-i like listening to musicals, with my taste mostly residing in musicals people most likely havent heard of before. My favorites at the moment are “Twisted: The Untold Story of a Royal Vizier”, “Something Rotten”!

Hope this wasn’t too much lol, but thanks for the opportunity!

Okay I really appreciate all the information you gave me and I was stuck between two mercs so I did both and you can pick which one you like better!

For the first Merc I've picked

Demoman!

Demo is definitely one of the sweetest people and one of the most in touch with his feelings

He does things pretty spontaneously so he doesn't give you a chance to overthink

He listens intently whenever you tall especially if it's about what you do and don't like

He'd never insult you and he always tries to see your point of view on a situation

He's smart enough to recognize when he's wrong in an argument and he'll apologize

He's super supportive of anything and everything you do

You: *breathes* Demo: YEAH THATS MA S/O!!!!

He couldn't care less about how you look

You could have just woken up and he thinks you look absolutely gorgeous

If he could he'd spend hours watching cartoons with you since he absolutely loves them

You and him go stargazing some nights to just relax

Please show him your music tastes he'll listen to every song of your favorite artists

He's such a musical theater nerd and you and him gush over different musicals

Or if you're looking for someone I bit more thoughtful I'd suggest

Heavy!

Whenever the world feels overwhelming and you feel so insecure Heavy will be right beside you to tell you you're beautiful and to shield you from the outside

He does research whenever you two have a disagreement and he comes to you when he realizes he's wrong to apologize

He always waits to think about what you feel before he says anything

No one can say anything bad about you bevause Heavy is standing behind you and daring them to say it again

For him, looks don't matter in a relationship but since he knows you're insecure he goes out of his way to give you a different compliment about your outfit or hairstyle every day

Sometimes you two draw together even if it's not Heavy's speciality

Long walks at night are one of Heavy's favorite ways to bond with you

He does research on your favorite musicals and he'll definitely take you to some of them as a surprise

Hope these were okay! I tried my very best and thought about each Merc carefully for around 10 minutes!

#tf2 x reader #tf2 demoman x reader #tf2 heavy x reader #matchups

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adventureofthedancinggirl · 2 months

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WIP Wednesday 03/13/2024

Saw this post about "Work in Progress Wednesday" and figured I might as well do a writing update. I have a lot of things in my drafts, but these are the ones I've been actively working on. (both are BNHA and TDBK)

1) See You After

(tdbk, post-war, epistolary fic, slow burn, healing, hurt/comfort with moments of humor)

Status: 44 chapters are posted on AO3, published WC is 47,733 words.

The word count on my draft document recently broke 100k words (I guess that's why it takes forever to load on mobile)

Some of that is the outline formatting and scattered notes for future scenes that will probably change. But still, I'm impressed with myself and a little scared.

The upcoming chapter, which I'm currently working on, will be the final chapter in Part II: Rebuilding the bridges that were burned.

The next section, Part III: "No one told us (that winning the war would be the easy part)", is proving to be the most challenging part to organize out of the entire fic, but I have several major scenes from Parts IV & V written already.

I'll probably take a short break between parts II & III so I can finish up this next one:

2) Everything's Upside Down (unless I'm in your arms)

(tdbk, established relationship, 3rd year, fluff, literal sleeping together, aspec shouto & katsuki)

Status: drafting, not yet posted. Current wc is ~8k words

I don't think I've talked about this one here yet but I've been working on it a lot this past month whenever I needed a break from all the emotional scenes in SYA.

It was initially inspired by the chapter in the light novel when they're at the training camp and Iida wakes up to find everyone sleeping in the most chaotic way possible. In that chapter, Shouto had flipped around so that he was sleeping upside down and Katsuki kept kicking his blankets off.

That's the main premise of the fic - the struggle of getting used to (literally) sleeping with someone else, and other challenges of a new relationship. Also featuring: awkward confessions, Shouto being oblivious but also quite perceptive, Class A making assumptions, and important realizations about different forms of intimacy.

#oops it's not wednesday anymore but i wanted to post this before going to bed #my sleep schedule is terrible #which is a trait that i apparently like projecting onto shouto #dancing girl writes #sya writing log #see you after fic #fic: everything's upside down

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goremet-chef · 2 months

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its so cute i need to. ramble okay

in creatures of sonaria like. man. a year ago at this point? i made friends with someone and like. just by chance, they decided to add me to their pack and let me kill with them and like. I WAS NERVOUS im not known for. my social prowess 💀 but they liked me? and they added me as a friend and idk it was nice. like it was a group and i was kinda in the group? even if i was mostly quiet the whole time, i was still helping and covering for them yknow?

i didnt play for a while, i went from like. playing daily to playing monthly but i started playing again and i remember i think they invited me a few times to come play like with the roblox invite function but i wasnt online at the time and so. IDK i didnt think anything would come from it yknow? but. when i joined their server on accident, they added me to their pack immediately and said hi and im like SHOCKED. did i matter enough for them to like. feel the need to say hello to me and invite me to hang with them? IT. its happened more and more, i like to play with them whenever i can and i get nervous maybe im annoying them by joining them all the time but they always invite me and say hi, and its to the point where other people in the group also say hi to me and it

you must understand! im a fucking loser man, im not someone people get along with, im painfully awkward, i feel like an alien trying its best to act human okay. but it feels good, it feels like. NORMAL. we arent serious friends like i dont know shit about them, probably never will honestly i just like to wreak havoc with them. ive always been afraid of like. INFILTRATING a group, thats what it feels like!! whenever im accepted anywhere, im so terrified im latching onto false hope, im scared that im forcing my way in and im too happy to really see it. but. they say hi to me and they mess around with me and they JOKE WITH ME like. OKAY!!! im still quiet like 90% of the time but they know alright im busy playing the game, its not like i have much to say anyways!! its fun to be. social? like im too scared, fearing itll go so horrible wrong and bruise my already quite small and fragile ego, so when it goes RIGHT?? idk i just wanna. ramble about it cuz

i joined today and one of the other members said "YAYY looksee" and it. MY HEART... i like all of them cuz i hang out with them enough like. i really only talk to the one who has me added since they will actually say things to me directly but i feel like im opening up more? just a little, im still shy but. IDK knowing theyre like getting used to me? yay looksee?????? teehee!!!!!!!!! idk why it makes me so happy, i guess im easy to please if you show me the slightest bit of. positive acknowledgement im absolutely giddy. the bar is on the floor 💀 but i dont care!!

when have i ever made a friend on roblox? ive been called slurs and insulted and told to kill myself more times than anyone has ever like. tried to be my friend 💀 i get it, im not very welcoming, its not like i try to be. im friendly sure, but quiet, and if im in any sort of social interaction (which can range from someone speaking to me and not going away after they say what they wanted to say to literally just. something cute, like someone sitting with me or giving me some food) i cant handle it (i scream and close the game as fast as possible, my heartrate goes up im BREATHING HEAVILY IM SCARED... it was nice but. terrifying!!! i feel the obligation to stay and thats too big of a commitment OKAY... roblox creature you must understand)

ITS A LOT FOR ME OKAY.. and i mean. i know how my roblox avatar looks, ive been told its cringe enough times for one lifetime, im tired!!! i get it. catboy with a skirt ooo so scary. that boy is a faggot, yeah yell it louder at me.

the worst part about that is like. IT HURTS... i know i shouldnt care about what a child on roblox says to me in creatures of sonaria trade realm, but lord! it hurts. i dont socialize, ive had enough bullying!!!!! ive done my time IN SCHOOL. alright thats enough im good on the bullying. idk im just weak i guess I CANT HANDLE IT. im not good with confrontation, i wont come up with a witty response, ill just sit and wait for them to get bored from me ignoring them and leave me alone. ITS ROUGH. especially cuz its ALWAYS about my avatar, i look gay i get it, thats the point.

im a very like. ive spent TOO MUCH TIME kicking myself down over 'cringe' alright. i literally lost my interests and passion cuz i was scared of being cringe, wanted to fit in better. it made me MISERABLE. im very pro cringe i love it cuz? its only cringe if you suck, things that are 'cringe' i never find cringey even a little bit, cuz i like it when people are happy. but. i find it hard not to be a little embarrassed. its ROBLOX i get to look however i want!! i love silly roblox avatars okay, i dont want to be embarrassed about mine!!! im not a confident person, i wear it around because i like the image of this stupid catboy clothes on a very man shaped man alright looksee is my pride and joy i give him a little kis. but maybe they get the wrong idea? idk. i dont think so, i think they just dont like how i look. whatever. also my avatar matches with my friends really well so. its iconic to me!!!

still, like i said. its why i try not to play social games alone on roblox, im scared to be bullied i will admit 💀 if my friend was there, she'd tell them to kill themselves for me!!! but. shes not always there. i literally panic anytime someone runs up to me directly i sigh and say 'here we go again' cuz im waiting the imminent insults alright. IM TIREDDD so tired. they dont get him like i do. hes an avatar ive DRAWN before hes just an oc at this point, i wont ever change him cuz i like him but . sometimes it gets hard!!!

im so off topic here i just. NEED TO RANT A LITTLE cuz it. it does genuinely bother me but im too scared to like. VENT ABOUT IT to any of my friends cuz im absolutely sure some of them would roll their eyes, its just a game!! game is important to someone like me, game is the closest i come to like. living in a real social world, of course its important to me!! game is the easiest way for me to interact with strangers and not die of a panic attack immediately after 💀

WHATEVER im yapping i love to yap but. idk i just wanted to talk about it, im still so . it feels good to know that even if im weird and quiet, im not so weird and so quiet that people want to avoid me all the time. theres SOMETHING about me that they think is cool enough, like. well. i can overthink if i want to. maybe theyre adding me into their pack out of pity? maybe they dont actually like having me around but they feel too awkward to like. they feel like its gone too far now? in too deep? or maybe. im not as awful as i think i am!! maybe im weird and offputting but its okay :]

LISTEN. maybe this is normal for everyone else but its a big deal for me oky. ITS HUGE ACTUALLY. like just to have a mindless video game buddy? someone i dont even like. I DONT EVEN KNOW THEIR PRONOUNS BRO thats how little i actually converse with them but. like its not serious its just a little treat for myself, a little thing i can have. shaking like a chihuahua right now. its embarrassing to be so excited about it but. i dont do this sort of thing ever really, maybe im getting better? even if im not, ill still enjoy it

#this is so long dont read ihis GUHH #im rambling they call me the rambler #also ranter i do be ranting a little but . im allowed ive dealt with enough!!!!!#i need to get it out or ill EPXLODSION #like im unpleasantly stimming right now its too much for me GET IT OUT #i need to watch tjoc or something i need to be scared out of my mind and laugh about it i need. i dont know what i need

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gaudebo · 2 months

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Ahhh thank you for the long response!!

Mostly his story with free will was because I had watched a campaign once where a guys character (non-orc. It was a different type of character, a made up one by the dm) had a similar storyline but very much more slavery-ish. So I had tweaked it a bit and made it into my story because slavery definitely made me uncomfortable in general since it's not my story to tell. I do 100% get the ickyness with the way it was beforehand, I think In general I had less of a slavery Outlook because he chooses to be a part of the group and can change his mind whenever and leave and stuff like that, but there are a few things that could be tweaked especially with the way I describe them!!

Ever since I realized the racism with orcs I started thinking of ways to re-work the "work for hire" thing and I was thinking maybe a guild like you were talking about !! (kinda like the companions in Skyrim) and I do enjoy that idea a lot better because instead of his whole story being "wow I do what people tell me even though I could choose not to" (which didn't really make sense 100%) it can be more "I am MORE than what I can do for people, and too many people underestimate me and I deserve to be happy even outside of my family, who I've lost, and can find people who appreciate me" kind of thing.

I'm really glad I read what people had to say on orcs and racism because before I did, it never really clicked for me. So I didn't put together how these things are because of that and how orcs stories have been so problematic because of that and I never would have thought about the possible issues with it (your post from like 2022 included lol).

The story is staying between my friends and I for the most part but I still wanted to change things once I realized everything.

I really like the idea of my friends character genuinely wanting my character and his help and because of that my character is a bit surprised because hes not used to people needing him for more than what the job he's accepted said of him.

I think a main reason I thought of the "does whatever they say thing" is 1.) Because of the other campaign I watched. I loved the other character because he was so well played and his interactions with characters and stuff were fun (I also like big guys who are secretly very caring which this character was) and 2.) Because in my head the services were usually very "you're being hired to follow me into this quest" thing, whether the quest was long or short. But I like the idea of it not being him being told what to do all the time and more "this is the job. you need to get the job done to get paid. If you don't get it done you don't get paid." and maybe sometimes people act as the "leader" of the group and kind of boss him around and he doesn't always listen to show he doesn't have to.

Also about the Skyrim npc thing I totally get that! I don't like how there's not many really good orc npcs and 99% of them are just violent. I just love being able to play one and giving him the life he deserves, a happy little house with a chest filled with cool stuff and a garden. And a bookshelf with all the books he collects.

I'm sorry this is so long I'm just glad to have someone to talk about this ! Ive been in love with fantasy lately (ever since I finished the book legends & lattes and loved it) and especially orcs and im excited to start making a story with my friend and maybe solo stories. - ✨

Hi again! Sorry once more for my late responses, I am in the blender in life.

I always think it's good when people reexamine their biases especially with things they enjoy! It's easy to overlook the negatives with things you're passionate about so I am glad you're taking the time to think about how to make things Better. Especially with fantasy and even More especially with DND and similar settings, there's a lot of being inspired by what's already been written but there's a tricky balance there too as much of the pre-existant lore is... unfortunate!! (I am looking at you, orcs. and drow also.) I'm happy to hear about your orcs that are living happy lives and making interpersonal connections and doing well for themselves! We need more of that!

No need to apologize ^^ my ask box is open! If you ever want to DM me I am usually lurking around for that too. It may take me a bit to respond (oof) but not because I'm not open to it! Have a nice day :]

#orc anon #fantasy racism #god. i have witnessed so much fantasy racism this week. and yet #i love the genre i really do #anyway that's not the point! always happy to get messages #long post

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kirbycrouch · 7 months

Text

living with bpd has to be one of the hardest things i have to deal with. i cant even begin to count the amount of friendships and friend groups ive lost and pushed away because of my unstable emotions and my inability to talk about my feelings and be vulnerable with people. i fucking hate being vulnerable, i hate talking about my feelings. but also i guess its just that i never really learned *how* to talk about my feelings. my whole life i was yelled at and told im "ruining everything" and am being "selfish" or "self centered" or that im a "burden" whenever i talked about my feelings or showed emotion. you see, my family has always been huge on their image and reputation, anything that could possibly make them look bad was seen as a problem, and thats why my family always ostracized me and saw me as a problem. when i got bullied all throughout grade school and high school my parents would blame it on me and would tell me "why is it only you that has these problems?? no one else in the family had these problems!!" and thats around when the first time i attempted to kill myself, but even then my parents tried so hard to hide the reason why i was in the hospital and told everyone its from "allergies" even though i was there for two weeks. sure theyre nicer to me now, but the damage was already done. truthfully though im used to always getting the short end of the stick and losing everything, or having things just. not. go. my. way. on top of me having bpd and being autistic and honestly at this point probably schizophrenic too with how fucking often i experience hallucinations and paranoid delusions, i also found out that i have pcos the other day right before my birthday, which my birthday also sucked but at this point it was too late for me to have a good birthday in the first place. i have to deal with having chronic mental and physical illnesses for the rest of my life that not only affect my personality but affect my physical appearance and health too. im not desirable physically or emotionally. everything i liked about myself is being taken away from me. and it doesnt help that i keep pushing away the people that care about me because of how fucking unstable and stupid i am. i lost everything. and i really cant even be upset because its all my own fault. i just continuously self sabotage myself. but i guess its not only my own fault because how cant i be scared? not that long ago i got banned from a college club, lost a whole group of friends, because i reported my rapist/abuser and they called me a liar. my rapist/abuser was "banned" too but we all know that i was only told that so i wouldnt report the club or "expose" them or whatever even though regardless no one will fucking believe me. when i was raped in high school someone i thought i could trust told everyone and i got called a "whore" and a "slut" throughout the whole 4 years there, not to mention he was in most of my classes despite me fucking begging the school to take him out of my classes or to change my schedule so i dont have to fucking see him everyday. of course they didnt listen, though. why would they? a few weeks ago my therapist literally told me "next time this happens you should keep it to yourself because no one believed you the last two times" and that just. broke me. but i cant even really be upset because shes right. no one believed me, and if it ever happened again still no one would believe me. no one ever takes my side, ive been alone and lonely my whole life, but its mostly my fault that im like this so who am i to get upset over my own actions. i dont know how much longer i can handle any of this, i thought things were getting better for me but i feel myself falling down the hole again. i really want to end it all. i dont have hope for things ever getting better for me. some people are just given a bad set of cards and theres no way they could ever win, and i think im one of those people, so i should just give up.

#rant

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xiao-isms · 3 years

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Hello I just recently found your Sub Xiao things and oh my god thank you for the food 😍😍 If ur taking requests, Reader with a strap on with a dildo that can vibrate, and Xiao taking it ? 👀 Multiple orgasms would be fun, but anything you write is excellent so I don’t mind where you take this 😳

— dirty.

character. xiao

content warnings. multiple orgasms, semi dirty talk, verbal humiliation, cum eating, a little bit of cross-dressing. note that reader does have a strap-on but i tried to make it as gn as possible !

word count: 1.7k words

voicemail. agshs thank u sm anon! i really liked writing this one so i hope you enjoy <3 ps sorry if the ending is rushed, i recently started uni so ive been superrr busy lately

you slid a hand up xiao’s milky thigh and underneath his blush pink pleated skirt with a mischievous grin on your lips. halting for a moment, you took the opportunity to squeeze that soft, meaty flesh that you loved so dearly, pressing wet kisses and angry red hickies across his skin. once satisfied with your work, you pull away and lift your head to look the mighty yaksha right in his now watery eyes and archons, you doubted even the lord of geo himself would believe you if you told him how pathetic his war-hardened adeptus looked at this very moment, all from a few simple touches. the sight was laughable, really; his hard cock protruded from his pretty little skirt, precum already beginning to stain the garment, accompanied by a face so flushed you swore you could see steam emerging from the top of the other's head. you grabbed the man by his chin and yanked him forward. "you're fucking disgusting." the words came out a bit harsher than intended but xiao, oh xiao, he loved it. he loved it when you made him feel absolutely deplorable; when you broke him until he felt like he couldn't be fixed. he didn't respond, just looked at you with hunger, like he was silently begging you to fuck his brains out.

you could feel a primal need rumbling from deep inside your chest. “does that turn you on?” you asked with a cheeky grin that only seemed to be getting larger by the second. the petite man whimpered in your tight hold, nodding ever so slightly but much too embarrassed to give a direct response. “how naughty of you, xiao. so shy, and yet so, so dirty.” you interlocked your lips with his, sliding your tongue in his small mouth as soon as you got the chance. it was messy and sloppy and it felt like xiao hadn’t kissed anyone a day in his life, saliva running down the sides of his pointed chin while his mouth hung open, completely pliant, but it was so hot. you were the first to pull away which only made the adeptus whine in a desperate, high-pitched voice.

“so needy,” you whispered in the shell of his ear, rubbing his sensitive sides. “you want it? you want my cock in you, pretty boy?” he makes a sound of affirmation, one that you can’t quite make out, but one nonetheless. xiao shouldn’t be acting like this, he knows he shouldn’t—he’s a yaksha, a seasoned demon slayer, and yet, whenever he’s with you like this, he just can’t seem to control himself. he thrusted his little hips into thin air with vigor in what seemed to be an attempt to get some kind of friction, something—anything—to soothe his aching, leaking dick. “ah, ah,” you hummed, gripping his waist so tightly you were both positive there would be bruises there the next morning. “the only way you’re going to cum tonight is with my cock plowing into your tiny hole.”

the way his face contorted slightly and his brows furrowed while fresh, blood-hot tears ran down his flushed cheeks only spurred you on further. you spread his legs as far as possible, yanking both his cute panties and tight skirt off, throwing it behind you without care. you haphazardly coated your fingers in saliva before inserting them inside your boy with newfound fervor, eager to fuck him until he couldn’t think straight and was unable to scream anything other than your name. he moaned and cried and whimpered as you pumped your wet digits in and out of his hole. the adeptus whined, he was so close, so close, but he desperately wanted to be good for you-- and there's hardly anything that he wouldn't do to achieve that, even if it meant holding back his own orgasm. you scissored your middle and index finger, adding a third once you were sure xiao was stretched well enough. soon, you were able to thrust your digits in back and forth freely while the other's body continuously spasmed and shook with close to unbearable pleasure.

too impatient to keep waiting to enter the small man, you pulled your fingers out entirely, the act ripping a loud wail from your lover. "wh...w-why'd you stop?" the words were slurred and almost incomprehensible—it sounded something akin to what someone drunken on sex would say, certainly not a powerful immortal such as himself. the question truly makes you wonder if he'd actually been paying attention to your previous statement or if he really was that incoherent already. how cute, you hadn't even started and here he was, a drooling, stupid mess. you didn't respond, instead opting to press your lips against his, thrusting your tongue deep into his mouth once again. whether or not he understood you before didn't matter, the night would end the same way: with xiao becoming an inchoate husk of a being, only able to give as much pleasure as he received.

quickly, you fastened the harness onto your waist, clicking the straps in place. the plastic toy connected to the o-ring of the strap-on was useful in more ways than one; you knew the both of you’d love it as soon as you saw it. slowly—or, as slowly as you could, patience thrown to the wind long ago—you slid inside of your boy with ease, his breath hitching in the most adorable ways. you smirked and wrapped your fingers around the small device that activated the dildo. “are you ready?” before the man under you had a chance to answer, you clicked the 'on' button, the sex toy whirling to life. for a second, you thought you could see hearts in xiao’s teary, amber eyes. he looked so, so beautiful like this; spreading his legs and moaning for you like a cheap hooker. nimble fingers landed on his waist once again, allowing your hips to slam against the meat of his thighs. his mouth hung agape in shock at the sudden movement, whimpers and whines spilling from those pretty, swollen lips. "a-ah! mmph, p-please go s—oh!—" the words seemed to have fallen dead on his tongue due to a particularly well aimed thrust, hurling him forward. every little movement felt so good, like he was on cloud nine, and oh god, don't even get him started on the way the pseudo cock vibrated in him, making his head go blank with overwhelming lust. he could feel that familiar heat stirring in his abdomen, his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

"mm, 'm gonna cum, ooh, g-gonna cum, p-please!"

with one more rough, domineering push of your hips, he came over the newly washed bed sheets. you slowly came to a stop and slipped your fingers over the head of his now softening sex, swiping away a hefty amount of your lover's seed and putting it towards his face. "open.” you demanded, inserting your moist digits in his mouth. his red, puffy lips wrapped around them, lazily licking you clean. "good boy," you praised as you pulled your fingers from him. "do you like that? you like eating your own cum like a filthy whore, hm?" he didn’t respond, apparently much too fucked out to even nod. you pulled the man’s cheeks together, leaning down and pressing the tip of your nose to his own.

“i asked you a question.”

his mouth opened slightly at the deep, commanding tone of your voice; he was trying to answer you, he was trying to be good, but his mind was so fuzzy he could hardly breathe. with much struggle, he moves his head up and back down. the action was hardly noticeable with how subtle it was, but you took pity on the poor yaksha, placing a kiss that he felt was almost too gentle considering the current situation. you heard a whimper erupt from xiao and a small, close to inaudible humming sound could be heard within the quiet room.

oh.

you had forgotten about that.

the adeptus trembled underneath your form with overstimulation. he feared he was going to cum again, untouched; he could feel it in the way his dick was beginning to harden again, the way the muscles in his stomach churned and tightened in the most delightful ways, ways that made him feel lightheaded and painfully aroused. you were silent, watching your lover’s face scrunch up with a glint of pure lust clear in your half-lidded eyes. you begin to rock your hips back and forth again, only moving a centimeter an inch this time. xiao couldn’t stop thinking about how good you felt inside him, how his slick walls clenched and unclenched around your barely moving cock, making the smallest squelching noises.

it was all so filthy.

with that thought, the warm coil in his lower body burst and he was positive that he was seeing stars from how hard he’d just orgasmed. it was ego-boosting, really, knowing that only you could touch him like this, look at him like this. you hummed, increasing the pace of your thrusts until xiao was crying and incoherent, garbled whines falling from his mouth. “s-sen—o-oh fuck!” tears clouded his vision as you abused his prostate, taking advantage of that sensitive spot inside him. with heavy breaths, you leaned down to look at him directly, the smell of sweat and sex prominent on both of your bodies. “you’re such a good boy, xiao,” you commended between grunts and quiet moans. you brushed his messy hair back so you could see the pleasure on his flushed face, planting kisses on each of his cheeks. he keened at the attention, throwing his arm over his face to hide from the embarrassment.

“you take my cock so well, such a brave boy.” you knew he loved to be showered in praise more than anything, even more than he loved to be pinned down and degraded. he felt as if he’d cum at any second, the way the silicone toy felt inside him was more than exhilarating and your occasionally words only added to that addicing feeling. nimble fingers wrapped around the base of his dick, hard and dripping precum, preparing itself for its third orgasm. you finished him off with just a few strokes, his small form twitching with overstimulation. you slowly came to a stop and cupped his red face with your hands.

“what am i ever going to do with you, baby?”

#hey im not dead #🎐. . . xiao #WAIT I FORGOT TO TITLE THIS #genshin impact smut #xiao genshin impact #xiao x reader #genshin impact #xiao smut #sub xiao #bottom xiao #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #xiao

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mydearfantasy · 3 years

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When they’re insecure 🖤

Characters: Diluc & Albedo

Summary: You’ve been hanging out with someone close to them and they begin to doubt themselves

Genre: Angst to fluff

Part two with Razor and Bennet coming soon :)

DILUC

For a man of many qualities, he was sorely lacking in social skills

It was truly a blessing that he’d managed to land such a sweetheart as you, your relationship in its early infancy

Kind, caring, beautiful, beloved by all... by all...all... by the forever nuisance in his life, his dearest brother

Many a night he watched the two of you laugh and joke in a booth at the bar. You had came to accomply him on his shift, but he was too busy dealing with all the customers to pay you enough attention, attention that kaeya had quickly taken for himself

Had he ever made you laugh so? It took him months to form a bond with you, had it taken Kaeya mere days? Were the two of you more compatible?

The already ever present frown grows deeper, scaring off whatever customers were present. Anger which was bubbling fervently inside him was soon replaced with crippling doubt.

You... you weren’t going to leave him, right? You’d spent precious moments together, moments that helped lift the heavy burdens of his ever present torments. The loneliness that he felt deep within himself dissipated whenever you were by his side... he couldn’t stand to lose you

He finishes his shift early that night, the unsettling feeling forming a pit in his stomach, deciding to leave without you, uncertain of what not so kind words would be directed towards his brother should be encounter him

Was he really going to lose you to kaeya?

Only several meters out of the bar, he hears footsteps rapidly approaching, he prepares himself to deal with whoever dared to make his night even worse

But it was you, an arm slipping into his, a look of concern plastered on you face

“Is everything alright? You left without saying anything.” He doesn’t have the heart to take his arm away, resigning himself to his fate. Perhaps... you’d be happier... with someone else. Even if that someone is Kaeya

What could be even offer you? Aside from gifts and riches. He was forever absent, awkward in conversation. He didn’t believe possess an ounce genuine charm, aside from his gentlemanly facade.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, he tentatively begins, already feeling that the end is in sight, “You looked like... you were having a good time. I didn’t want to disturb you.” Eyes downcast, he prepares himself for the words he says next “If...if there’s someone else you’d rather spend your time with... that’s... alright. I won’t hold you back. Please, do what makes you happy.” He truly only wanted your happiness... even...even if it wasn’t with him

You manoeuvre in front of him, clasping both of your hands in his, “ What are you talking about? Kaeya was talking about you! He was telling me what you were like as a kid! I couldn’t get anything out of you... so I thought I’d ask him!” A mischievous grin forming on your face, “He told me all about how you couldn’t sleep without your stuffed dragon, how you still couldn’t say spaghetti correctly until you were 15-“

You’re cut off mid sentence by his arms enveloping you in a bone crushing hug, immense relief flooding through him, smiling softly, you return the embrace.

You realise the reason for his actions, it leaves you feeling guilty inside. he was insecure. Scared. You’d do whatever you could to remidy it. “It’s alright Diluc, I’m not charmed quite so easily.” You whisper gently, wanting nothing more to comfort him and ease the guilt you felt for making him feel so troubled

Looking into his eyes, you steady his face against your palm, “You’re the only one for me. I assure you,”

He leans in, looking deep into your eyes for confirmation, that your word is pure and true.

Satisfied, he seals the deal with a soft kiss on the lips

ALBEDO

Truly doesn’t notice it at first

He trusted you, of course he did, so he didn’t think anything of you hanging out with Timeous

That is, until you were too busy to spend time with him

He took some time to relfect then, noticing that you spent time with him and timeous whenever you came to visit, offering him words of encouragement on his tasks when you noticed his struggles

An unpleasant feeling begins to rise in his chest. One that he has never felt before

He takes more time to confirm that’s what’s causing his discomfort, not wanting to act without complete evidence

He can admit himself that he lacks experience in relationships, often feeling uncertain about how to proceed

You always seemed happy. Eager to help him with his experiments, laying his head in your lap after a long day so you could read to him

What had went wrong?

He thinks for a long time, trying to find a cause and solution

Perhaps he hadn’t spent enough time with you. His experiments were time consuming, often not very interesting for those not involved in alchemy, had Timeous provided the affection you were in need of?

He decided the only way to remedy this problem was to approach you, despite the unfamiliar nerves rising in his chest

You’d already changed his life for the better, made his days even more exciting, finding new enjoyment outside of alchemy, to continue on without you... was that even possible?

Pouring steaming mugs of coffee for the two of you, he sets them on the table in front of you, greeting you with a quick hello, making haste, seeing no reason to delay dealing with the problem

He could always resolve problems, but, what if this was one he couldn’t? He tried to bury thoughts like those before they had a chance to rise to the surface.

Cool eyes regard you over the steam, suddenly unsure where to start. Setting the mug down, he begins. “Ive noticed that a lot of your time has been dedicated towards Timeous as of late. Being a personal friend of mine, It is easy to acknowledge that many are drawn to his kindness.” He watched your brows furrowed in confusion, mouth almost open and ready to rebute him, but he continues on. “ I want satisfactory experiences for both of us. For us to continue forward, I believe it would be best to address the problem at hand.” Now he felt the nerves rising, sticky and prickly in his chest. What words would he hear next? “I... want our relationship to continue past this. I do not think it would be pleasant... if it ended so soon. Whatever issue there is, I want to fix it. Together.” Now, the dreaded question, “...Why is Timeous occupying so much of your time?”

The question hangs in the air for a minute, unsure of how to proceed. Had he felt like this for a while? Scared as to why you weren’t spending time with him?

You reach out, sensing the implications behind his words, clasping his gloved hands in yours, “You have nothing to worry about Albedo. Truthfully, you always looked busy. Concentrated. A little... tense. I didn’t want to bother you. I know how much you dedicate yourself to your craft, I didn’t want to distract you from that.” You smile sadly, realising you caused a problem as you tried to prevent one. “You’re the only one for me, I swear it.” Your smile picks up, hoping to comfort him,giving his hands a soft squeeze, “My chalk prince.”

A smile returns to his own face, relief flooding through him. “I’m truly glad of that. To proceed forward on this path without you... it doesn’t bear thinking about.”

You finish your drinks, hearts as warm as the mugs in hand.

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scaramel · 3 years

Text

how they comfort you

ft. ayaka, gorou, kazuha, thoma, yoimiya

a/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for waaay too long by now bc of how ive been busy with inazuma, but i finally sat down and finished it so hope you all enjoy <3

AYAKA can almost immediately tell whenever you're at unease. she knows the tell tale sign of a smile that doesn't quite reach your eyes and a pair of fidgeting fingers. "please, come with me," is all she asks, leading you to the safety of the komore teahouse; a tranquil place flowing with the scent of cakes and tea leaves, almost as if a peaceful part of the world had been sealed into the single spacious room.

"something is troubling you. would you like to tell me about it?" she begins, a single hand pressed over yours as a comforting promise. "it's alright, there is no one to judge you here."

ayaka is a very capable listener, quietly observing as you let out everything on your mind with an occasional nod or worried frown in response. with no one around, she can hold you close as she combs your hair soothingly. despite the warmth burning through her cheeks and the drumming heartbeat in her chest, she truly tries her best to whisper endless words of affirmation and unconditional support.

GOROU can't help but mirror your unhappy expression from the moment he first sees it, ears drooping down in contrast to his otherwise usually bright demeanor as he thinks of the right words to say.

"sunshine? is everything alright?" he asks at last. with an expectant look, his arms spread open to offer a heartfelt hug. he pulls you in eagerly, stroking your back as his tail wags ever so slightly. he hopes you find it comforting.

gorou wants to be a strong pillar that you could always lean on — a safety net of sorts. as such, he's willing to do anything to help you get back up on the tougher days. he'll ask what you want to do or talk about, easily caving in into any of your requests as long as it can help.

"there, there, i'm here. i'll keep you safe, always."

KAZUHA is another exceptional listener, as he's told you himself multiple times before. when he sees you looking so dejected a part of his heart shatters, but he would never push an answer out of you. all he wants is to be there for you and take away all your burdens, and so he does.

he sits beside you, letting the wind and fallen leaves connect you both in a soft breeze. his shoulder is there for you to cry on, so is his hand for you to hold and his lips to kiss away your sorrows one at a time. whatever you need, say the word and he'll readily give it to you.

"would you like me to hold you?" he offers politely in that calming voice of his, arms held out wide to welcome you into a warm embrace. "i'm here for you, my love. you need not worry."

most of all, kazuha yearns to let you know he understands and that you don't ever have to go through your troubles alone. you'll always have him and he would willingly follow you all the way to the ends of the earth, all as long as you let him.

THOMA would start out by teasing you, although not quite in a condescending way. he just wants to lighten up the mood and crack a few small jokes, even if it earns him a playful push or a halfhearted eye roll from you.

"aww now who could have possibly made my precious darling upset? :("

if you seem more troubled than he initially thought or break down into tears, however, he'll instantly turn serious about it and take you somewhere more private to ask what's wrong and if you're okay.

he gestures you to sit down on a bench as he kneels beside you, holding both your hands with a single thumb drawing comforting circles into your skin. he lets you take as much time as you need to express yourself, or not at all if you choose to. but if anything, he wants you to know he's there and ready to do anything to make it better, even if it means picking a bone with any bastard that dared to upset you.

YOIMIYA would immediately try her best to cheer you up, which involves anything from bringing you your favorite snacks all the way to displaying a private fireworks show just for you. your happiness is a priority and all she wants is to make you feel better, even if it's just by a bit.

if you prefer to just talk about it, that's fine too! she'll let you lay on her lap and listen to you wholeheartedly, throwing in some funny commentary in between in hopes of making you laugh or lighten up. even if you don't feel like talking just yet, she'll happily do all that for you instead, bringing up any interesting stories that could take your mind off things as she kindly caresses your face.

overall, yoimiya is very supportive and just wants to see you smile as brightly as the summer sun and the fireworks she sets off into the night sky.

#genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #ayaka x reader #kamisato ayaka x reader #gorou x reader #thoma x reader #kazuha x reader #kaedehara kazuha x reader #yoimiya x reader

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angstysebfan · 3 years

Text

The Past Can Break You - 5

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

AU: Avengers

Summary: You and Bucky have been dating for aa few years. As far as you’re concerned he is the one. But what happens when a blast from the actual past shows up?

A/N: Ive seen a lot stories of Bucky getting his first love from the 40′s back. And I’ve always wondered... what would happen if he was dating someone already? Reader is from this time. Not proofread.

Warning: implied smut, angst is back

The next 2 weeks were amazing. Bucky really turned everything around and showed you that he was committed to you. It made you feel so much better. While you felt bad that he now completely avoided Dot, because she is still out of place, you didn’t feel that bad because you knew she was bad news. Whenever she saw you and Bucky together she would scoff and glare at you. It made you uncomfortable.

One day the whole Avengers team was called into a meeting to discuss an upcoming mission. Per Steve and Tony, everyone, except you, were needed. You didn’t like the thought of staying behind with Dot in the compound, but you were a team player, and wouldn’t argue. Bucky on the other hand let Steve have it with both barrels.

“Steve you know the situation with Dot. Can’t someone else stay behind?” he said to Steve.

Steve sighed, “Yes, I know this will be difficult, but everyone else is needed for their skill. Y/N’s skills aren’t needed on this mission. She agreed, so why are you fighting me on this?” Steve argued back.

“Of course Y/N won’t fight this, but I am trying to protect her from Dot. You remember how vicious Dot can be, and I don’t want her to upset Y/N when we just started to get back on track,” Bucky said.

“Look Buck, I get it. I do. But this is how it is. The compound is big enough that Y/N won’t need to be anywhere near Dot. By the way, when are you going to tell her that she needs to start looking for employment and another living situation. She makes everyone uncomfortable. Even Tony is starting to get annoyed at all her questions about FRIDAY, and he loves showing people how smart he is,” Steve asked.

“I-I don’t know. I mean I know I have to do it, especially after what she’s pulled, but I still feel bad for her. I mean she didn’t ask for this to happen, and doesn’t deserve to be thrown out on her ass, but I know it’s the right thing to do. I’ll talk to Y/N about it and see if she has any ideas. Maybe if we help setting her up I will feel better about it,” Bucky said.

“Yea, I know. Let me know if you need help. But we gotta get packed and head to the quinjet. And please don’t worry about Y/N. Your girl is strong, and she knows how Dot is. She will be fine. Besides, we are only gone for like 24 hours, what could happen?” Steve asked.

Bucky didn’t respond and watched as Steve walked out of the meeting room. He ran his hands through his hair, what could happen? He hoped nothing, but he didn’t trust Dot. It’s funny the way she is acting now didn’t bother him when he was in the 40s, but now, because of you, he sees that she is not as great as he thought.

Bucky sighs and heads to your shared room to find you packing his bag for him. He smiles as he walks in, “Hey baby,” he says.

You look up at him and give him a bashful smile, “Figured I would help you out,” you said.

Bucky walks up to you and wraps his arms around you, pulling you into his embrace. He looks into your eyes, and all you see is love and admiration in them. He leans in and connects his soft lips with yours. After a moment he deepens the kiss and you feel his tongue on your lower lip. You open you mouth in response, allowing him full access. When the need to breath becomes too great you pull away, panting.

“You’re only going to be gone a day,” you say with a chuckle.

Bucky also laughs, “Will you be ok? Here? With... her?” he asks.

You brush your hand through his soft hair, “Yea. I’ll stay clear of her as much as I can. But I’ll be ok,” you say.

Bucky pecks your lips again. “When I come home, I was wondering if you could help me with something,” he asks.

You look at him with confusion, “Like what?” you ask.

“I think it’s time for Dot to go off on her own, but I don’t want to just kick her out and make her fend for herself. I was thinking you could help me find her a job and a place to live? I would just feel better if I know I wasn’t kicking her out with nowhere to go,” he asks.

You smile and nod, “Sure. I’ll be glad to help. I’ll start while you’re gone,” you say.

Bucky kisses you one more time, “I’ll be back tomorrow. I love you, Doll,” he says.

“I love you too, Buck.”

You have to say you are surprised when you find yourself not running into Dot at all. It’s almost like she doesn’t want to be near you either, which is fine. She has spent most of the last 24 hours in the lab, while you stayed in your room looking up possible jobs and apartment for her.

You thought it was nice of Bucky to at least help set her up and not throw her to the wolves. It was something you admired about Bucky, his big heart. You both have been texting before the mission, but since then you haven’t heard from him. You hope everything is ok.

“FRIDAY, any update on the team?” you ask the AI.

“No agent, I’m sorry,” she responds.

You decide to take a nap in hopes that when you wake up your boyfriend will be home. You want your family home safe and sound.

You woke up to the sounds of the team in the hallway. You walk out and see Nat and Wanda and hug them hello. You head toward the common room hoping to see the guys, but don’t. You walk back toward the elevator and heard something from Dot’s room.

“Oh Dot, I’ve missed you so much, Doll,” you hear Bucky moan.

You gasp in horror as you continue listening to Dot moan and beg for Bucky to go harder. You can’t help the tears that begin to fall as you hear your boyfriend and his ex having sex.

“So good baby, you’re so good. Taking me so well, you feel amazing. No one is like you, I love you so much,” Bucky moaned.

You’ve heard enough and turn, running back to your shared room. You can’t be near him when he comes in pretending he didn’t just fuck his ex. Your heart is in a million pieces as his voice continues to play in your head. All you hear is her and his moans and his words. He loves her. It will always be her. Maybe you just need to learn to accept that.

“Buck, I think you should have told Y/N you got hurt. She is going to be worried about you,” Steve scolded.

“Look, I know my girl. She will be mad at first, but then she will nurse me back to health. I will have to convince her to ride me later, but it will be so worth it,” Bucky says with a smirk as the doctor continues to pull out shards of shrapnel from his side.

“Seriously man? TMI!” Sam complained before leaving Medbay.

Bucky laughed and then hissed as the doctor pulled another shard out. “How much longer? I don’t want Y/N to think I’m dead if she knows we are back,” Bucky asked the doctor.

“One more piece... and....” she pulls the large piece out, “There! Now I will quickly clean and bandage. no stitches cause you will heal fast, but please no sex tonight. You might bleed all over her,” the doctor said with a glare.

Bucky and Steve laugh. “Oh I talked to Y/N about helping me out with Dot and she agreed. I figured it was best to have her involved with that situation from now on,” Bucky says to Steve as the doctor cleans and bandages his side.

“Good idea, less messy that way. I hope everything went well here with the 2 of them,” Steve says.

“I’ll find out,” Bucky says as he puts his shirt on.

Both men walk to the elevator and head to their floor. They say their goodbyes in the hall as Bucky opens the door to your shared apartment. You aren’t in there, which confuses him, but he figures maybe you went to the kitchen.

When he walks into the bathroom he senses something is wrong. None of your toiletries are there. It was different from when you cleaned, plus his was still there. He walks back out to your room and sees that everything on your nightstand is gone too. Now he starts to panic as he goes to the closet and sees that all your clothes are gone. He tries to not have a panic attack because that will slow him down. He goes to head to the door and sees a piece of paper on the floor:

Bucky,

I guess I’m the stupid one. I’m stupid to think that everything you said to me was true. I was stupid to think that I could compete with your one true love. I was stupid to think that you really loved me. Well I won’t be stupid anymore. No need to lie and say what I heard isn’t true. I hope you and Dot are very happy together in your new apartment, but I’m done. Have a nice life.

Bucky dropped the letter and fell to his knees as tears pool down his cheeks. What the hell happened that you up and left him? You are angry with him, and he doesn’t understand why. He allows himself to cry for a moment before rereading it.

Dot.

Chapter 4 / Chapter 6

Oh Dot you dirty bitch! Feedback is appreciated.

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PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I FORGOT ANYONE!

#bucky #Bucky Barnes #james bucky barnes #Bucky angst #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes angst #james buchanan barnes #james barnes #buck x reader #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky x dot

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nakedbibi333 · 3 years

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hi! im kind of new to law of assumption and old to law of attraction. law of assumption is not a hard concept but im a bit confused. i find myself reacting to the 3D too much and like i find it hard to persist? what do i do to make persisting easier? i think it’s because i don’t know much about what im getting into?? all i know is affirm and persist and etc. i hear things like time is an illusion, the 3D is an illusion, circumstances don’t matter, we are all gods of our reality. but WHERES the proof?? i can’t blindly follow people’s success stories because im not them and if we are truly the gods of our realities, doesn’t that mean someone else can manifest failure in mine? like i want to use law of assumption and i want to believe to get what I want fast and easily BUT i want to know how it works and that im not following a delusion to make myself feel better and in the end, I am just left with disappointment and failed attempts at manifesting that left me with the consequences of my actions. ive been in the community for almost 2 years and i don’t think ive ever gotten results. i am not usually agitated but it’s exhausting. i affirm and persist and nothing shows up and im worried im doing it all wrong so i ask and now I’m even affirming wrong?? I know manifestation is supposed to be easy and not feel like a chore but how can it not when everything I desire is of so much importance to me. I can even dm you, just please help me so I can actually manifest what I want. I’ve done self concept but I keep breaking. I don’t even know what affirmations to use to combat my limiting beliefs. Tbh I’m tired. I feel like if someone explained to me how this works and how to do it with no mistakes and how to keep faith in the unseen, I could actually get what I want. I keep failing and failing because I affirm and persist but I affirm wrong or I have a limiting belief that hasn’t been uncovered yet. I’m so exhausted and I just want to get what I want. I just feel like if someone told me how it works and exactly what to do, I wouldn’t be so confused and find it hard to persist

Hi! Okay, so since this is a very long post, I will try to answer each of your questions/concerns in the order you mention them.

So about persisting, I can understand how it seems a bit complicated. You persist when, after a certain period of time, you still don't see movement of your desires manifesting OR if you see the OPPOSITE of your desires manifest. Oftentimes, when you finally open up your mind to the idea that your mind creates your reality, then some past doubts and fears can manifest as well. Your mind will often try to manifest opposite things in order to make you feel like you are doing something wrong, which is why so many loa teachers say to persist. It can be very difficult for people to persist, which is why so many people feel like they can't manifest, or that manifestation isn't real, because their 3D reality has too much weight in their lives, so they take it as truth and end up giving up on their desires manifesting. It's important to begin to believe that your 3D reality is extremely malleable and is only a reflection of your inner reality. You need to take the power away from the 3D and give it to yourself and your ability to create exactly what you want.

Then you ask about proof of manifestation. It is very true and understandable that other people's success stories are not enough for many people because you want to be able to trust the information that you are going to be getting into. Personally, before getting into manifestation, I already had my fair share of unexplainable success stories in my life, so it just seemed like an answer to the questions I've had all my life. Even with these success stories and experiences, when I first got into manifestation, I still would doubt myself by wondering if it was simply a coincidence these things happened, or worse, that I was becoming delusional. I want to tell you that every single person who is now into manifestation has gone through this feeling. We all worry that we are just doing "wishful thinking" and being delusional because the world we have grown up in has always been so practical. It's not easy to believe in something that seems so impossible without any previous personal experience. So, the only advice I can give you for this is to try to manifest extremely small things to build your faith over time, such as seeing a yellow butterfly, getting your favorite food, or seeing some sort of sign, so that you would know that what we are talking about is actually the truth. Also, there are so many documents that go more in-depth on how our minds create our reality, including CIA documents and books about the science of manifestation, such as books by Joe Dispenza, and books about the subconscious mind, such as books by Joseph Murphy, and many many more. Since the only way, you will really believe in manifestation is by having your own experiences, then manifesting small easy things is probably the best route.

Then, you mention how you're worried about "someone manifesting failure into your reality." My view on this is that you are the only person who can affect your life and nothing can happen to you that you don't specifically manifest into your reality (whether it be consciously or unconsciously). Everyone can manifest, yes. Everyone has control over their reality. You can even manifest people acting in certain ways towards you. But that's in your experience specifically. If we are talking about quantum physics, time is not linear, technically all possibilities of all time, ever, exists right now. We also shift through different realities at every moment depending on our mindset, beliefs, and decisions. So, if someone manifests something in their life that would affect "you" but does not align with your thoughts and beliefs, then it won't show up in your reality. You have control over your own reality, nothing comes into your life without you allowing it, so that's a very empowering thought, in my opinion. I really suggest that you affirm this so that you don't have to worry about others manifesting negativity over your life because you would never personally decide to manifest it into your own life.

I also want to talk about how you worry about affirming wrong or simply manifesting wrong. It's Important to note that these beliefs can also negatively affect your manifestation because that is not you truly living in the end. If you were living in the end, you would know that simply deciding that you want this to happen, means that it will happen and that it has to happen. You never need to doubt your manifesting process because your subconscious mind is so powerful and it is so easy to make it do things for you! Just like what @divineangelbee says, you can COMMAND your subconscious mind and it will listen and give you exactly what you want. You don't have to visualize or affirm or do anything. Simply tell your subconscious exactly what you want it to do and trust that it listens! I really think that the reason that you have not been having too much success is because of this, that you are constantly doubting your methods which keeps you from truly living in the end.

Then, about limiting beliefs. It can be beneficial to people to be aware of their limiting beliefs. However, there has been such an intense focus on limiting beliefs in the loa community (mostly on youtube) that I see so much. Coaches keep you focused on the problem of limiting beliefs so much that they don't actually help you move on from them. Personally, I found that whenever I focused on my limiting beliefs, it was like living in the old story. (if you don't get this reference, I seriously suggest you read or listen to Neville Goddard's lectures in which he talks about the law of assumption. They are life-changing). Focusing on limiting beliefs keeps you stuck in that story you are telling yourself about your life. It keeps you from overcoming them and becoming limitless. It helps me to affirm that my limiting beliefs no longer have the power to hold me back. I don't have any more limiting beliefs because I manifested not having them anymore. Manifestation works in many different ways, and a lot of people don't realize that you can simply manifest your desired mindset as well. I suggest trying this!

So, to make this as clear as possible, I will tell you how I personally manifest (disclaimer: people manifest differently, many different things work for different people, I am not saying this is the only or best way to manifest, but this is just what works for me).

First, I get my idea of what I want to manifest. Usually, I want to manifest multiple things at a time, there really is no limit.

Then, I will decide what will help me "feel it real" and "live in the end." This can include techniques, but I don't use techniques every time. I don't like to visualize because I am personally a maladaptive daydreamer, so visualizing makes me feel like I am daydreaming, which keeps me from really feeling like it's really happening. (But, if it works for you, by all means, go for it) I may print out a picture if it's a physical item in order to trick my brain into having something physical that represents this or adding it to a Pinterest vision board (I am a very visual person, so it always works for me). I also like to make a list of what I want just to keep it in a place that I can go back to and mark off in the future, telling my brain that this is a goal I need to achieve (I find that my brain loves to check things off of my goals, it makes my subconscious mind already start working towards the goal). But most of the work goes into my mindset. I don't affirm a lot because I feel like it becomes a chore if I have to recite affirmations all day every day. I may put up affirmations on my chalkboard or put them on my computer, but I don't make it a habit to really say them at specific times, etc. I really focus on making myself feel deserving of getting my manifestation and I also live in the end. Living in the end is where you feel confident that your desire is already yours. If it helps, which it does for me, I like to believe that I have it already in the "quantum field," or the 5D, or however you believe in it. It is not about being delusional and pretending like you have it, no, it's about feeling trusting in your own power to make this happen for you and it will come, no matter what.

After that, I "drop it." I don't forget about it or stop desiring it, that's not what letting go means. It means that I know that I don't need to do anything or force anything to happen because my subconscious, or the universe, will bring this to me and I don't need to worry about anything related to my desire. I also self-regulate my emotions by meditating, focusing on the things that make me happy, and reminding myself of how powerful and capable I am.

Then, eventually, it manifests. Or, if it doesn't come in the timeframe I wanted it to, or if something that would oppose my desire pops up, I focus on my own self-concept, making sure I genuinely feel deserving of and that I can get what I want, and I persist in that feeling that my desire is still mine. No matter if I got rejected, no matter if they told me I couldn't get the job, no matter if it looks like it won't happen. I still persist. and then it comes.

Finally, I want to mention that I am only here to give advice and I can't make anything physically happen for you. To see actual movement in your reality, you need to be willing to go through failures in order to find out what works for you. I have had manifestations fail, I have had MANY manifestations fail. It's not always a perfect process. I don't charge money, my identity is not on this page, I am not here to be a famous coach or to act like I know any better than anyone else. I am just trying to help you guys reach the point that you deserve to get to in your life. But I can only do so much. I really hope this helps.

#ask #advice #long post

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luminnara · 3 years

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It’s Been a Long, Long Time | Ch 6

Summary: When HYDRA had their prized asset, the Winter Soldier, they did something no one ever thought was possible: they gave super soldier serum to an omega. With the sole purpose of tending to him during his ruts, she spends decades living in HYDRA facilities, denied her humanity and her life. Now, years later, Bucky Barnes has his mind and his own life back...and the last thing he ever expects is to see a familiar omega again. Bucky/OC, a little angsty but mostly smutty/fluffy/romantic!

Part One | ... | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven

Tags: @kyrah-williams @oceanmermaidwitch @shawnie--jo @super-cape @ferxaniti @namjoonwatcheshentai @fandomsstolemylife00 @youngblood199456 @nightlygiggless @darlingely @ bluemoon-icecream @kaz11283 @jenjen8675309 @dollfacev8 @witchinpractice @mystical-b3ar @sukeraa

Bucky refused to leave the omega’s side while she stayed in the lab. Bruce had to stop him from trying to crawl onto the bed with her, and after about the third time, he convinced the super soldier to just pull up a chair like a civilized person and hold her hand while she drifted off to sleep again. Now that she was with her alpha, she had settled down for another nap, more interested in resting than answering any more questions so long as Bucky stayed and kept an eye on her.

Steve had to admit, it was endearing. He had never seen his friend so absolutely enraptured like this. Whenever the omega, or Ten, as Bruce was still calling her, shifted in her sleep, Bucky’s eyes were snapping over to make sure that she was okay. Whenever she let out a little whimper, he was purring and stroking her hair. Whenever she seemed like she might wake up again, his attention was completely on her.

“So...sure you don’t remember her?” Steve asked, pulling up a chair. He had left for a few hours to work out, and after a lack of updates from FRIDAY, he headed back down to check on everything. They were exactly as he had left them, which was a good sign. At least nothing was getting out of hand.

Yet.

Bucky shrugged, rubbing the back of the omega’s hand with his thumb. “I dunno. It’s...foggy.”

“Well, it seems to me like you’ve either got a history together, or she’s mistaking you for someone else.” Steve said. “Quite frankly, it’s hard to do the latter.”

“I’ve dreamt of her.” Bucky said quietly.

“...what?”

“It’s not much, but...I’ve seen her face.” Bucky looked down at her. “I think that no matter how many times HYDRA wiped my memory, she’s always been in there. Kinda like the one constant that was always around, the one thing I could always count on being in the base with me.”

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” Steve asked.

“Never knew if she was real or not.” Bucky sighed. “I thought...maybe she was just something my mind made up to fill some of the gaps. But she smells exactly like I remember.”

Steve sat back in his chair, his arms crossed over his chest as he watched his friend. Bucky wasn’t snarling anymore, most of his attention trained on the omega while she slept. Now that he was close to her, he had calmed down significantly, though he still wouldn’t let Steve within five feet of her bed.

“Just got off the phone with Tony,” Bruce announced, walking in. “He and Pepper will be back tonight. Pepper’s having some clothes and personal items delivered for our new omega friend here. They also asked about renovating a more permanent room for her, but I, uh...told them I wasn’t exactly sure what the situation would be.”

“She’s staying with me,” Bucky said immediately.

“Now hang on, hang on,” Steve leaned forward.

“Steve,” Bucky growled. “I want her with me.”

“Buck, you don’t even know her—“

Bucky interrupted him with a loud snarl, the omega in question whining and squirming in her sleep at the sound of it.

He immediately shut up, brushing a thumb over her cheek and shushing her until she was sleeping soundly again. Fuck, he felt so stupid. What was wrong with him? She could have woken up, or been scared, or upset, all because he couldn’t keep his big mouth shut. She needed her rest, and he needed to stay quiet.

Steve almost couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

“Oh, Buck,” he shook his head. “You’re in deep.”

—

Amoretta woke feeling well rested, and it wasn’t until she tried to stretch and felt the tug of her IV drip that she remembered where she was. Opening her eyes revealed the bright lights of the lab, and as she started to sit up, a few faces came into view.

“Welcome back, Sleeping Beauty,” Bruce said. “How are you feelin’?”

She licked her lips. “Juice box. Now.”

“Way ahead of you. Had this one waiting as soon as you started waking up.” He tossed one to her and was pleased when her hand shot up to catch it. “Reflexes look good. Vitals are all reading normal. I’ll have to run another test to see what’s going on with those suppressants, but I’m willing to bet you’re metabolizing them fairly quickly now. How are you feeling?”

She pulled the little straw off the back of the carton and jammed it into the top. “Nauseous. Like usual.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Side effect of the suppressants?”

“Always has been. Other than that...I feel great, actually.”

“Well, as soon as these wear off, we can figure out something nicer and more modern for you. If you want to use them, I mean.” Bruce shrugged. “Your choice.”

She smiled. “Choice. I like that.”

“Hey, we’re all about independence here,” Steve said happily. He was glad to see she was awake, even though Bucky wasn’t.

The other alpha was still at her side, but, as of about half an hour ago, he was napping. Steve made a mental note to never let him forget the way he slept straight through the one moment he had been waiting for all day.

“What time is it?” She asked. “There’s no windows in this damn place.”

“Just after dinner,” Bruce chuckled. “You slept most of the day. Bucky hasn’t left your side.”

She looked over to her soldier, smiling warmly at the sight of him sleeping. He was even snoring softly. “I haven’t gotten to see this in forty years.”

“Did you two, uh…” Steve cleared his throat. “Spend a lot of time together?”

The omega laughed. “You always this awkward around girls?”

“That’s not—“

“Relax, I’m just giving you a hard time.” She sucked on her straw. “But...yeah, we did.”

“So...you were just kept for his ruts, or…” Steve was so awkward it was almost endearing. “I’m sorry, that came out wrong. I think.”

“It’s okay. I know my lot in life.” She kept her eyes trained on Bucky as she spoke. “But if I’m going to answer more questions, I want to get out of this bed. And I want real clothes. Then I’ll talk.”

And so, only several minutes later, Bruce was handing her a sweater and some shorts he had grabbed from a little stash of extra clothing, and Bucky was startled awake by Ten stepping past him. She was finally free from all the tubes and cords that had been sticking out of her during her little hospital stay, and she was all too eager now to explore the tower.

She stood on wobbly legs, almost falling onto him when she tried to take a step. Bucky was up in a flash, ready to catch her, and as she fell against his chest, he wrapped his arms around her. Despite just waking up, he felt fully alert, completely ready to tend to his omega’s every need.

His omega...he liked that train of thought.

“We can head up to the common area. It should still be quiet.” Steve said, leading the way out.

Bucky kept an arm around his omega’s waist as they followed, Bruce bringing up the rear. He wanted to be touching her at all times, constantly in contact so that he couldn’t lose track of her. His instincts were roaring to life, demanding that he do everything in his power to make sure that she was safe and in his line of sight. The elevator ride was tense and full of possessive growling, Bucky constantly shoving Ten behind him to keep her in the corner and as far away from Steve as possible, and everyone breathed a sigh of relief when the doors slid open and they could step out of the cramped space again.

The common area was empty, thankfully, FRIDAY informing them that the other Avengers were all either working out or in their private quarters.

“Good,” Steve said, heading towards the couches. “No interruptions. Got it, FRIDAY?”

“Understood, Captain Rogers.”

“C’mere,” Bucky mumbled, pulling his omega down to sit on one of the couches with him. Part of him was feeling a little sheepish and self conscious of his behavior...but the rest of him didn’t give a shit. The others could stare and shake their heads all they wanted, but he’d be damned if he let Ten slip through his fingers again.

Or whatever her name was.

Steve and Bruce sat across from them, making sure that they left as much space as possible between themselves and the new omega. Neither of them had ever seen Bucky behaving quite like this--he was on guard, hyper aware of everything around him. He made sure that she was pressed up against his side, an arm draped possessively over the back of the couch so that it was unmistakable that she was with him.

Christ, what had gotten into him? He couldn’t remember ever acting this way about an omega before.

“So…” Steve cleared his throat, sitting with his elbows resting on his knees.

Bucky didn’t really like the way his posture made him lean forward towards his omega, but he could deal with it for now. “So.”

“What do you wanna know?” Ten asked, plucking at Bucky’s shirt. She seemed to be even clingier with him than he was with her, perfectly happy to be hanging off him or tucked up against his side. “You met my demands. I guess I’m an open book now.”

“I don’t want to overstep my bounds,” Steve said. “We just need to know as much as you’re willing to share.”

“Then ask a question.”

“...Alright.” he cleared his throat again. “You said HYDRA used you to help with Bucky’s ruts?”

Ten nodded, her expression remaining even and cool.

“Could you tell us more about that?” Steve glanced at Bucky. “Were there ever any other omegas, or anyone we should know about?”

“There were omegas before me.” she answered. “When I first got to the compound, there were a lot of us. They kept us all in big cells, so everyone talked. People said things about how HYDRA was grabbing omegas off the street for their super soldiers, and how the one at our base was the biggest and scariest.”

Bruce raised an eyebrow at her tone. He wasn’t exactly sure what he expected her to sound like while she regaled them with her life story, but he definitely thought there would be a tad bit more apprehension in her voice. She seemed proud of herself, and more matter-of-fact than a lot of omegas would be while talking about their alpha’s previous partners. Or...whatever you called prisoners whose only purpose was to help during ruts.

“And I bet he was,” she sighed, leaning her cheek on Bucky’s chest and looking up at him adoringly.

“Well, I don’t know about that…” Bucky said, an almost shy smile on his lips. And...was he actually blushing?

Steve was going to lose his mind.

“You said the other omegas couldn’t handle it? That’s why you were given the serum?” he prompted, trying to keep them on track before he drowned in the sticky sweetness of her happy pheromones.

“Right.” she turned her attention back to Steve and Bucky let out a quiet huff. “HYDRA didn’t really like to take care of us. And the soldier--I mean, Bucky--would wear them out. So...HYDRA would just kind of let them go. Or put them down, maybe. I never saw it.”

Bucky’s expression dropped. His blush was gone, and he almost looked like he was going to be sick as he listened to her talk.

“But it wasn’t his fault,” she said quickly, glancing between him and Steve. “I don’t think it was ever on purpose, you were just...demanding.”

He gave a groan, leaning his head back against the couch. “You don’t have to sugarcoat it, doll. I’d rather know what I did, at this point.”

She offered a small shrug. “I don’t really remember it being that bad, but I don’t think I ever met you before they gave me the serum.”

“That’s something, at least.” he mumbled, dragging a hand down his face.

“Why you?” Steve asked. “Did you have any prior military experience, any ties to something the others didn’t?”

“No.” she laughed. “I never even got in fights before HYDRA.”

“Then why’d they use such an important resource on you, specifically? Not trying to take a dig at you, it’s just...well, omegas don’t usually…”

“I know,” she said. “Omegas aren’t supposed to be tough, right? That’s why they only ever let alphas become super soldiers.”

“That’s not what I…” Steve trailed off and then sighed. “Sorry.”

“I told you, they gave me the serum so that I would be strong enough to hold my own. It also ensured I would always be around, no matter how many years passed.” Her fingers found Bucky’s free hand and she took it, absentmindedly playing with the smooth vibranium knuckles. “Having me as a constant meant they could stop spending so much time and effort on always having a new omega around for him. Plus…well, I wasn’t really there, but I heard something about it once…”

“What?” Bucky asked.

“They let you choose who was going to become your omega.” She said, looking up at him. “They gave you a bunch of scents, and you chose mine. I guess it was the only reason they didn’t, uh...humanely euthanize me.”

His eyes were wide. The thought of HYDRA killing his omega brought a low growl to his throat, his chest rumbling with the vibrations of it. “No.”

“Well, clearly they didn’t!” She said brightly. “My file said I was a kicker.”

“So they gave you, an already aggressive omega, the serum, but never gave you any trigger words or fished around in your brain?” Bruce shook his head. “Surprisingly sloppy, considering who they are.”

“It’s not like they ever sent me out into the world. I stayed in my cell all day, unless I was needed for a rut. Then I went and stayed in a different cell.” She sighed. “And if they ever needed to, they could just use the alpha to grab me.”

Bucky clearly didn’t like the thought of that. He made a frustrated sound, leaning his head back again. “Great.”

“It was never bad.” She let go of his hand, moving her fingers to cup his jaw. “You never hurt me. You wouldn’t. Sometimes, when I acted up, they would make you go retrieve me, because they knew you were the only one who could do it. If they didn’t send you, they would just knock me out.”

“So...that was it?” Steve asked. “Ruts, serum, cryo?”

“For thirty years!” She chirped. “The last time they froze me, they were freezing him, too. They always tried to keep us in cryo at the same time so that I could be thawed out and ready when he needed me. But...I guess they just...left me there?” She frowned.

“See, that’s what I’ve been trying to figure out.” Steve said. “I didn’t see any signs of a struggle at that base. I’d say they left in an orderly fashion, but the fact that they didn’t take you along makes me think they were in more of a hurry than they made it seem.”

“Natasha might have a better idea,” Bruce suggested. “We can talk to her, try to figure out—“

“FRIDAY, open the damn door or so help me God I will rewrite your entire personality.” A voice interrupted from the other side of the door.

“I’m sorry, Tony, but Captain Rogers asked me not to.” The AI said.

“Well, is it an emergency?” The man scoffed.

“No emergency measures have been executed. No security breaches have been identified.”

“Then I’m sorry, but Captain Rogers does not outrank me when it comes to my own robots. Open the door, beautiful.”

She seemed to sigh. “Very well, Mr. Stark.”

Ten perked up, leaning forward slightly. She was watching the door curiously, tilting her head a little when she heard it slide open. Bucky rolled his eyes, grumbling to himself quietly and pulling her up against his side as another alpha strode in.

“Really? Having a party without me?” the man asked, a smooth, casual air about him as he walked in and looked at everyone on the couches. When his eyes landed on the omega cuddled up next to Bucky, he stopped. “Ah, is this our new guest?”

“Go away, Stark.” Bucky growled. He didn’t like how long the other man’s gaze was lingering on his omega, not when there weren’t any scars on her neck to show who she belonged to.

“Always such a charmer, Barnes.” Tony said, flopping down next to Steve. “Lovely to see you, too. Care to introduce me to your friend? ….No, you’d rather just snarl and forget your words? I knew you were old, but I didn’t realize you were actually a caveman.”

“Tony,” Bruce groaned. “Don’t aggravate him. Please.”

“Why not?” Tony leaned back against the cushions, completely at ease and totally happy to be pressing every one of Bucky’s buttons.

“Are you Tony Stark?” Ten asked, wiggling out of Bucky’s grip to sit on the edge of their couch.

Bucky caught her around the waist before she could get very far, though, and dragged her onto his lap. He loomed over her, sneering dangerously at Tony as the other alpha flashed a smile.

“Bingo.” he said.

“I never thought I’d meet a Stark,” she admitted. “I always heard about Stark Industries, but I lived too far away from any big cities to ever get to see any of his exhibitions.”

“Ah. You’re from my father’s time. Of course.” Tony shot a pointed glare in Bucky’s direction. “Seems like Bruce left out a few teensy weensy important details on the phone today.”

“Well, it’s been, uh...an ongoing learning experience.” Bruce said sheepishly.

“Lots of developments, huh?” Tony raised an eyebrow.

“You could say that.” Steve said under his breath. “We came up here so Ten could be more comfortable while we talk.”

“Oh yeah? What’re we talkin’ about?” Tony asked.

“They were asking about my time with HYDRA,” she answered, cutting in before anyone else could. “And with...Bucky.”

Saying his name felt odd. Her tongue wasn’t used to it, and her mind wanted to call him alpha, or Winter Soldier. Bucky just seemed so…casual, such a strange thing to call a deadly super soldier. When she heard herself, though, she decided that she definitely didn’t hate it.

Bucky’s heart gave a little leap at the sound of his name falling from her lips. He wanted her to say it over and over again, in whispers and in screams, for nobody else’s ears but his.

“...Buck?” Steve asked, pulling him away from his thoughts. “You, uh, kinda zoned out there.”

It wasn’t until Bucky looked at Steve that he realized his eyes had been trained on the omega in his lap. “Yeah?”

“...Is this seriously how you’ve spent the past day and a half?” Tony asked. “Steve, I’m sorry, and I’m sure you’re just trying to be as helpful as you can be, like always, but I think you should let these two get a room.”

Steve looked at him incredulously. “Tony, really? I’m trying to get to the bottom of why exactly HYDRA would abandon the omega they pumped full of super soldier serum. They can get a room later—“

“Yeah, uh, wonder boy? I don’t think your pal is gonna last much longer before he tries to rip our heads off.” Tony nodded towards a very disgruntled Bucky. “You can resume your interrogation tomorrow, Cap.”

Steve looked to Bruce for help, but he only offered a small shrug and stood, heading towards the door. “He’s right, Steve. They deserve some alone time.”

“But—hey!” Steve protested as Bucky picked his omega up, striding past the two alphas sitting on the opposite couch.

“Thanks for everything, Steve.” Bucky said over his shoulder.

Ten squirmed, peeking around Bucky’s arm as she was carried away. “Bye, Mr. Stark!”

“Don’t look at him,” Bucky growled as they walked out the door.

“Did his father really make hoverboards? I heard once that Howard was promising hoverboards—“

“No.” He said flatly.

“...oh.” She huffed, slumping against him. “Where are we going?”

“My apartment.” Bucky stepped into the elevator, his grip still tight around her.

The omega perked up. “You have a whole apartment?”

He puffed his chest out a little. “Course I do. Gotta have a nice place for you, don’t I?”

“So I can stay?” Her eyes were bright and happy. “I can stay there, with you, all the time? Not just when you rut?”

He felt a sad little pang in his heart. When he spoke again, his voice was low and soft. “Of course, sweetheart.”

Then, his eyes widened as he realized what he was saying. “I mean, uh...i-if you want to, that is. I know it’s fast and all, and maybe...would you rather have your own room? Or I can stay on the couch—“

“Bucky,” she cut him off with a laugh, a soft hand cupping his jaw. “You’ve been my alpha for seventy years. I’d say we’re actually moving pretty slow.”

His expression relaxed again, lips stretching into a small smile. “Right. Yeah. You’re right.”

They spent the rest of the elevator ride in comfortable silence, Bucky rubbing his scent glands all over her hair. He wanted to make sure that the next time they encountered anyone else, she smelled exactly like him.

Like her alpha.

When the elevator came to a gentle stop at Bucky’s floor, the doors opened, and he stepped out in front of his apartment door. It opened for him, having already scanned his biometrics, revealing a small, but cozy, living room.

He set his omega down on her feet, watching anxiously as she stepped into his quarters. Did she like it? Fuck, was it too small? It was too small. She probably hated it. Fuck, fuck, fuck...he had to salvage this somehow.

“Well, uh…” shit, he sounded too nervous. He wanted her to think he was a strong, capable alpha.

He cleared his throat for another start. “Welcome home, Omega.”

Wait. That wasn’t right. Should he be calling her that? No, probably not, it sounded too possessive, too uncaring. He wished he just knew her fucking name, or something.

“I mean…Ten?”

Shit, he sounded so stupid. He wanted to impress her, not...do whatever this was.

She just laughed, though, turning and looking at him with those eyes that sparkled like starlight. “Amoretta. My name is Amoretta.”

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x oc #abo #omegaverse #alpha bucky #alpha bucky barnes #it's been a long long time #avengers x reader #avengers x oc

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