#yea i'm a cat person don't mind me

[sweetheartmotives]

`; 三 Clumsy Yandere;`三

Desc and possible Tw: Yandere themes, sexual themes, kidnapping, crying (from clumsy yan), begging (from clumsy yan), clumsiness/falling, angst. BIG angst!

Let me know if I missed any!

The weather was warm and the time was 2pm. You were out with some friends/family at a pizza shop and a family member/friend decided that you should come! You were on your way back to your and your family/friends' private room, until you saw someone fall, and to make it worse, they had a drink and it spilled everywhere. You decided to help them out! You walked over and he was already scrambling to grab some napkins and clean it up, you came over and helped him. He cried and thanked you. After that day, you earned yourself a stalker.

•• Clumsy Yandere who… you met in a very pathetic way. Soda all over the floor and you both on your hands and knees cleaning it up.

•• Clumsy Yandere who… is actually a loser. He doesn't go out unless he's forced to. This was one of his many embarrassing moments. But unlike the others, this one had a good outcome!

•• Clumsy Yandere who… waited for you to leave. It was dark outside, so following you wasn't gonna be hard.

•• Clumsy Yandere who… was horribly nervous when he followed you. If you turned around, he'd probably cry!

•• Clumsy Yandere who… follows you home and gets your address. Then he runs away..?

•• Clumsy Yandere who… gets your number, socials, etc. He spends the whole night searching for you on the Internet.

He got ur number thru ur address.. don't ask how

•• Clumsy Yandere who… jerked it to your pics. If you don't have any on social media, he probably took one 78 while stalking you.

Onto the genre stuff! :]

•• Clumsy Yandere who… drools over you. He can't get enough of you, so don't mind the drool dripping down his chin!

Casually drooling over you

•• Clumsy Yandere who… cries when you are loud. When they first took you down to their basement, you cried/yelled. They began to panic and cry.

PLEASE STOP He sobs

•• Clumsy Yandere who… is hopeless. They cry and beg for your forgiveness.. What can you ask? Anything!

M'sorry! I'm so sorry! Please forgive meeeee!! He whined and cried.

•• Clumsy Yandere who… created a playlist for you. They like romantic gestures! (◍•ᴗ•◍)♡

•• Clumsy Yandere who… does whatever you like. Wanna crochet or play video games? They're down!

Oh? Uh.. yea we can!

•• Clumsy Yandere who… was shy about sex at first.. but then humped your leg and cried about how much they loved you.

Mmm..~ ahhh~ I love you.. love u so much..

•• Clumsy Yandere who… likes to paint! They've painted portraits of you and gifted them to you.

Ah.. my love.. look what I made for you..! He hands a nude painting of you to you.

•• Clumsy Yandere who… does whatever you want. And he doesn't whine or cry! Pretty great, right?? :3

Of course my love..

•• Clumsy Yandere who… is a crybaby. He's also a really nervous/anxious person!

•• Clumsy Yandere who… has a resting sad face and always looks like he's gonna start crying :(

•• Clumsy Yandere who… owns 3 cats! Tax Fraud, eepy, and coco ♡

•• Clumsy Yandere who… is a loser. A very pathetic loser. No further explanation.

•• Clumsy Yandere who… always trips over his own feet. At any time in the day, he trips. Does he cry every time? Nope, but he's always close to tears and he'll be horribly embarrassed.

•• Clumsy Yandere who… gives kisses anytime of the day. Sure he's super shy, but that doesn't stop him from giving kisses! :)

Mwah mwah mwah (〃ω〃)

•• Clumsy Yandere who… lets Stockholm syndrome do its thing. Until then, he'll shower you with praise and love!

•• Clumsy Yandere who… knew it was wrong to kidnap you, but.. is it bad to be a little selfish?..

I'm sorry my love.. I just really wanted to be with you..!

•• Clumsy Yandere who… if you're really suffering while being with him and Stockholm syndrome doesn't work.. he'll let you go. He can't stand seeing you upset.

Goodbye.. my love.

•• Clumsy Yandere who… in the end, will always love you, even if you leave him.

My love.. I'll love you no matter what.. even if you hate me. My love will never stop..

This is a bit of a long wait! But I hope you enjoyed it as I enjoyed writing it! (◍•ᴗ•◍)♡

#This was long awaited! i hope you all enjoyed <3 #clumsy yandere #yandere #yandere oc #x gn reader #x gender neutral reader #yandere x reader #yandere male #gn reader #x gn y/n #x reader #male yandere #:3

[desceros]

me: [looks at calendar, gets a wicked idea, looks into the camera] happy springtime, turtle fam! who's ready to celebrate the season?

...mating season, that is. hehe. [dodges the tomatoes]

so! i had the idea that it would be super fun to have a community-wide event where we all have a prompt and then everyone fills it in their own way.

...i then decided all the prompts i came up with were too good not to use, but also none of them were Good Enough to use exclusively, so i changed my mind and the prompt is now just MATING SEASON. with a few suggestions at the bottom of this post if you're looking for some.

since spring is coming upon us, i hereby invite everyone to join in the vernal festivities... which in turtle parlance, of course, means only one thing: write, draw, whatever your version of "mating season", then join me on march 1 to post it with the tag #TMNTSpringShellebration. we then shall browse the fine selection of our mutual artistic efforts, and basically just have a good time as a community.

here are the prompts i came up with as starters-slash-things-to-include if you're looking for a place to get started. feel free to use these at will, or use them to come up with something of your own:

“Please don’t make me explain this. It’s humiliating as is.”

Oops, Looks Like Mating Season Came A Week Early This Year

“…In all of my mating seasons, this has never happened before.”

“I told you not to come by! It’s mating season!”

Probably should have expected it to be different now that he’s not going through it alone.

Because of Shenanigans, you have to wait. Wait… Wait… ok now.

They’re not the right person for mating season… but they’re the one who’s here, so…

“Show me where it hurts."

so yeah! see you all on march 1 for the, uh, spring shellebration. party popper emoji

questions i imagine will be popping up and i hope will clear up here before my askbox swells beyond capacity under the cut to keep this post from being Way Too Long. also it's really not that serious it's just an excuse to write slash draw for everyone Please Don't Take This Thing Too Seriously It's Not That Serious:

"can i participate?" yes! it's literally just an invitation to do something. nothing fancier than that. no need to be following me or in my friend group or whatever.

"can i write (insert fic idea here)?" yep! so long as it's related to the idea of mating seasons, it flies. reader insert? hell yea. oc? hell yeah. solo turtle and his favorite pillow? go for it.

"can i draw (insert art idea here)?" yep! uh. i know tumblr has the cops watching for sin bin material, but you art people know how to deal with that. and if you don't, uh, ask the other art people. im just a feral cat in a trench coat

"how do i participate?" write/draw/collect songs for/whatever. then, on march 1, post it and tag it #TMNTSpringShellebration. also, for funsies, keep it hush hush what you're working on so we can all be super shocked when the day comes! except, y'know, that you're planning on joining in. totally do that.

"when do i post it?" march 1. whenever on that day. waves hands around in a vague gesture at time zones not mattering. seriously don't take this so seriously it's just me wanting to create cool shit with my friends with a little more structure to it

"does it have to be horny?" i mean. it's an event about mating season. so by definition it's going to be at least a little horny. but however you interpret it is cool. even if it's just. idk. leo sitting sweatily in a chair looking longingly at a glass of water bc he's thirstier than usual. be smart about things, people. i'm not your dad.

"which tmnt verse is this for?" whichever one you want it to be for!! rise! bayverse! 2007! your fan iteration! your friend's fan iteration! your mortal enemy's fan iteration! yes!

"will you be reblogging everything?" absolutely not, but this isn't an event About Me. i am incidental to the thing. it's about Us. coming together as a community. for horny turtles. puts my hands on your shoulders. do it for you. for your friends. for the community.

#text tag #feel free to reblog this around. it started out as a thing for turtle fam but we all agreed that it would be fun for The Community #anyway yeehaw let's spend all of february thinking about what to do and then the night of feb 29 doing it RAH #tmntspringshellebration

[yakuzacanons]

Hi!! Can we have a continuation of "How They Would Confess Their Feelings To You" hcs? With Ichiban & co, Watase and Kashiwagi? Thanks!

Brain go brrrr yea, we can do dis chief. Includes da girlies also cuz I am realizing I do NOT write for them much?!

Kasuga Ichiban: "Listen, I just wanted to say... that I really like you! And you mean a lot to me!"

Hands sweaty moms spaghetti, he is. Nervous wreck long before he actually works his way up to confessing. The thought of having a crush on you is enough to make him sweat.

Is he asking Adachi and Nanba for advice? Yes. Is he taking it? Hell nah, it just makes him more stressed. Feels like his head is spinning after hearing all they had to say.

In the end, he just quite literally spills the beans after hanging out with you and once he starts he just cannot seem to stop! Ironic given how hard it was for him to start in the first place.

Nanba Yu: "Hey, look, I get it if you don't feel the same way but I just wanted you to know... you're really special to me."

It's ironic that he gives Ichiban dating advice given that Nanba has been a bachelor for quite some time. He's also pretty calculated and takes into careful consideration whether or not a relationship would even be viable so if he's confessing, it's quite serious.

Might consult with Ichiban or Adachi about it but mostly keeps it close to his chest. Good at hiding it in front of you so it might feel like it's coming out of nowhere but trust me, it's been on his mind for a while.

He's pretty candid and straightforward. Through the years, he's learned beating around the bush gets you nowhere. He'll likely just pull you aside, no fancy date or hangout required, and just tell you privately how he feels.

Adachi Koichi: "You really changed my life, you know that? Thank you."

With Adachi, it's less of a confession and more of an appreciation of who you are. At his age and given his track record, he's kind of resigned to living the single life and the older he gets, the less he gets his hopes up for things to get serious.

Having said that, he does still want to stress just how impactful you've been on his life. Like Ichiban does with all his friends, Adachi feels you deserve your praises to be sung.

It's not something he really plans on. He'll just blurt it out in the middle of any old conversation, maybe at a bar. If you ask him for clarification or to elaborate, that's where he starts choking up. Be nice to him.

Mukoda Saeko: "Ah, you know I wouldn't normally say this but... I like you, heh."

Little miss independent will not confess easily, let me tell you. She's got an awful lot on her plate right now and potentially changing the situation between you two is not necessarily low priority but more so another thing she doesn't need to stress about.

Honestly, you may have to get her a bit drunk for this to come out. Or at the very least, she may feel she needs a touch of liquid courage to get it all out there.

Saeko keeps it short and sweet. Ironically, despite her bold personality, she gets super shy after and insists you don't give her an answer until you've had time to think it over.

Tianyou Zhao: "Ahh, you've really gone and turned my life upside down, you know? But that's okay. I like that about you."

Sly as ever, Zhao is similar to Saeko in that it takes a lot to get him to confess. Only difference is he's more perceptive than Saeko. He can sniff out pretty quick how you feel about him.

Having said that, chances of him confessing are greatly increased if he thinks or knows you would reciprocate. His playful side gets in the way though as it becomes a cat and mouse game of who gives in first: you or him.

When it eventually turns out to be him, it'll be a cute little planned event that he's meticulously thought out. He'll close his restaurant for the night and invite you over for a special private dinner with a menu inspired by all your favorite things.

Joon-Gi Han: "I don't know, I just... I always get this way when I'm with you... will you just stay with me? For a little bit?"

Our poor baby boy Joonie bun is inexperienced in the ways of confessing. He understands having a crush and love as a concept but lack of personal experience means he's navigating all new terrority. Please forgive his blunders.

Unfortunately, Seonhee proves to be little help in these matters. Although she has more in depth observations of situations between you two, even she cannot determine for Joon-Gi if reciprocation is guaranteed.

More likely than not, he'll just start blurting out his feelings during a moment where his guard is down. Half of it boils down to he just can't keep it to himself anymore and partially that he feels he's being dishonest the longer he keeps it to himself.

#majima megaphone moment #yakuza #ryu ga gotoku #yakuza headcanons #yakuza imagines #ryu ga gotoku headcanons #ryu ga gotoku imagines #ichigang #ichiban kasuga #zhao tianyou #tianyou zhao #han joon gi #joon gi han #yu nanba #koichi adachi #saeko mukoda

[fallingstarslookthesame]

☄️ᯓ 𝐍𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐮𝐩 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞

HAIII!!!

Welcome to the silly nation‼️

...where you watch me say wild stuff, pretty much😗😗

𝘾𝙤𝙤𝙡 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙛𝙛 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙢𝙚:

-> My name's Reine, but Vanilla will do great too!!! You can give me a nickname, too :DD

-> I like MCR, PTV, FOB, SWS, and kindaaaaa getting into tokio hotel bc of my menace sister..

-> I use She/Her

-> Idk if this really matters,, but my mbti is ENFJ!!!!

-> I also like sports, mainly football (or soccer???) And I'm surely one big fan of Arsenal FC💯 I'm being serious. I LOVE football so much, please talk to me about it I will get EXCITED 😨

-> Outside of my music taste, I'm very open to listening to anything!! You can always talk to me about artists from other genres 😴😴

-> Sometimes I'll be a little bit of a slut for some dude named Tony Perry... Don't mind that pls🙏🙏

-> Lets just assume I like everything until I say I don't know what you're on about 🥱🥱

🍁𝐍𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬...

𝙆𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙:

💫𝐍𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟𝐢𝐬𝐡!

I'm not the most composed person so don't mind me if I started being.... strange😨😨

(Shhh...I say unhinged stuff and I don't even know how I'm not terminated yet🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️)

I run a cult (@mydinnercult) which is slightly unsettling but we shall CARRY ON🙏

𝐃𝐍𝐈 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓:

-If you're Dhar Mann.

Yeaaah, I have nothing against anyone really 😭😭 sometimes I think of putting something like "MCR5 DENIERS!!!" but then I think I can probably tolerate these people to an extent 😗😗

Dhar Mann tho is a different story, he's my sworn enemy.

As long as you're not weird in a bad way, you should be good🔥🔥

🪐𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞, 𝐈'𝐦 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞...

𝙊𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧/𝙨𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜𝙨:

yea I need a whole section for those, so what🙄😒???

@oddvanilla is technically also my main

My grandkid would be @how-long-till-im-a-fan-of-ptv,, and my GREAT grandkid is @hourly-pierce-the-veil... Interesting family tree, huh?🥱🥱

Then you've got the quiet cousin who's running on queue like ALL the time @sireninfestedwaters (jus stuff that are so perfect they satisfy me) and the cool aunt would be @trossards19jersey (Arsenal posting)

🍂𝐓𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐦 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐞𝐱𝐚𝐬!!

Edit: WOW LOOK AT THAT ANOTHER PTV SIDEBLOG!!! IM DEFINITELY GREAT AT MANAGING A MILLION PTV SIDEBLOGS 😎😎 @bestptvsongtournament

Cats or gtfo

#pierce the veil #Spotify

[ryverbind]

Faceless Fixation: Cat-FISHER [19]

A/N: in honor of 50k on Wattpad, LET'S GET ITTTTTT!!!!

----------------

VIOLETVIOLENCE: it's really pathetic that i have to pull you aside like a child to tell you to tone down your shit.

VIOLETVIOLENCE: grow up.

SALLYFʌCɜ: grow up? look who's talking. might i remind you of a verbatim quote by yours truly... "lint licking, cunt flap, cum infested puss bubble of a fucklet"

VIOLETVIOLENCE: i give back what i receive. you can dish but you can't take?

SALLYFʌCɜ: i can take twice as much as i dish.

VIOLETVIOLENCE: i'm so sure that you can. fuck off, sal. quit being an asshat.

SALLYFʌCɜ: so now it's asshat? what happened to llcfcipbf? you're losing your creativity. do better, your fall from grace is disappointing even to me

VIOLETVIOLENCE: fuck you.

SALLYFʌCɜ: i'm sure you want to

He's real fucking cheeky. Excited, if you will. What's gotten into him?

Three days ago, while purposefully and pleasurably butchering Sal's character in Dead By Daylight, if anyone would have told me that the bane of my miserable existence and I would have a personal chat box open— I'd have laughed in your face. I'd have gone full Edgar Allan Poe. You would be in a Speed Bump Grave™️. I'd hear your phantom heart beat under my floor boards.

And now, here I am, simultaneously working through the worst shift of the week and having to bitch at Sally Face Fisher via discord DM's.

I don't know what I've done. Maybe it's just my existence, I'm not sure, but he's targeting me. It's horrifically bad. Every message from him, even if he's in the middle of conversing with one of the other of The Faces, has something about me included. And it is always shitty.

I'm not scared of him, how could I ever be? So I opted (more like I was seconds away from punching his scrotum through my phone screen) to reach out to him personally and nicely ask him to stop... okay so that's obviously a lie but I had to threaten and insult him back. It was the only way I'd feel better.

But now I'm stuck with this loaded last message from him and I have no idea how to continue. Because it's a repeat. A repeat of that fated Discord call that threw my entire existence askew for a week. Or four. Maybe I'm still askew.

His necklace isn't under a shoe in the farthest corner of my room for no reason, after all.

Today was supposed to be simple. Not easy because working at the diner is never easy, but simple. Simple fucking worked. And now I have this conversation with Sally hanging over my head when I was actually looking forward to what's meant to come after I finish my shift.

I brought my mask with me today. My plan is to immediately go back to that mask store after my shift and convince the sweet woman who helped me to sign her work, give me her name, a business card— literally anything so I can tell the world who gave me my start. But now I'm anxious enough to plead not guilty by reason of insanity due to not-so negligent or accidental arson. And on top of that, I'm starting to map out an intricately laid out plan for Sal's Speed Bump Grave™️. Today's ordeals have taken my mind by storm and I'm about to bring everyone down with me in this descent toward madness.

I'm just angry. And bothered. And low key wanting to message Sal back with, "Yea, I am. What are you gonna do about it?" But I must stay strong. I must soldier on. I know the repercussions, I've tasted them for myself— felt them burn my lungs to a crisp. I went through what felt like decades of chain smoking in just mere seconds.

And it's all because of—

A chime rings. A chime that came from my phone. It echoes through the diner's break room, startling me so hard that I nearly leap out of my chair. It's like waking up from a dream where you suddenly start falling.

What was that? What just popped up in my notifications?

Unknown: are you a poe fan, by chance?

My kingdom. My entire kingdom for a chance to start making a Speed Bump Grave™️. For myself? For Sal? For the inexplicable human race? I don't even know anymore.

I thought he'd given up on Lexi. So what the hell is this? Why now? Why today? Why right after he finished— flirting? Baiting?— me.

My mind goes blank. Maybe... maybe he's onto me. Maybe he knows. That I'm Lexi. And now he's finally decided to enact his revenge. On today of all days, when I feel so sick with anxiety and paranoia that I could throw up every square inch of my bowels. My feminine rage is so ragey that I wouldn't be shocked if I sprouted a pair of testicles just so I'd have an excuse for whatever bruised masculinity I'm experiencing right now. Sal must be projecting on me all the way from Nockfell.

Never in my entire life have I felt so hopeless, so cornered. Every time I feel this way, I think it can't possibly get any worse.

And yet.

Me: umm, can't say that i am! don't know much about him.. but how are you, sally!

I don't know what's possessed me. In a normal world, I would have blocked him by now. Or better yet, if I wasn't so disgustingly deplorable and had a damn backbone, I'd have texted him a picture of myself and said "Haha, gotcha bitch!"

The sad truth in this way-too-real life scenario is that I don't have a backbone. And I'm too far gone to go back. I can't revert. There's a part of me that still holds onto my first live interaction with Sal. I just can't get the memory of him— smooth, gentle, kind, and likable— out of my head. No matter how hard I try.

One thing I can be proud of is the amount of petty packed into the fact that I never saved his number in my phone.

Unknown: good. perfect, actually. i brought some poe with me today, a story i think you might like

Some kind of doom-ish feeling washes over me. Like a storm cloud forming above my head. Poison seeping into my pores, infesting my blood. I don't like the way he said that. I don't like it at all. It feels a lot like the time some kid threw up all over me in second grade.

I'll never forget the sickening chill that spread through my body as soon as I realized what happened to me in the middle of educational centers in Nockfell Elementary. This situation feels threateningly similar.

Me: oh cool! so i guess you'll be having a chill reading day? wish it was me :,)

Unknown: not quite. but hey, are you working today?

That storm morphs into a hurricane. And there's twin tornadoes in the background, growing closer and closer to make a torrid, lethal combination. I have to take this in stride. Be smart, y/n. Whatever hell may come, handle it accordingly and do not make mistakes.

Me: ah, no! out of town to visit family :) really, crappy, awkward family get together... yikes...

He'll totally buy that right? I didn't overdo it. It was perfect. Overdoing it would have been an entire paragraph about how much I hate my mom. This is good, this is fine. I'm totally not breaking out into a cold sweat with clammy palms to match.

Oh, God. What if he sent someone to spy on Lexi? What if he hired some murderer off the dark web to take care of me and clean up the mess? I wouldn't put it past him. And this scenario isn't even worst case!

Worst case... I don't even want to think about it. I can't.

Unknown: damn, lex... on the day that i'm finally back in la and you're out of town? :(

Oh, thank God I'm a paranoid chicken shit.

Then again, fuck the fuck off. It's worst case scenario, the thing that I didn't even want to think about. The thing I wouldn't allow to cross my mind.

What do I do. What do I do? I leave work— that's the smartest decision. Naturally, this is the place he once went to and, out of boyish fantasies, he'll probably come back here with some expectation that Lexi will miraculously pop up despite her being in like... Iceland or something, whatever it is I manage to come up with in my next text to him. Which—

Unknown: i'm at the diner rn. was hoping we'd get to hang out this time. when do you get home?

Oh, no.

It's a fucking disaster on top of twenty other disasters. This is what a pregnancy scare must feel like. This must be the equivalent to walking into a room full of snotty, sick toddlers. This is dropping an uncut birthday cake.

I think I'm gonna puke.

I look up from my phone and take in the empty break room surrounding me. The off-white, paint-chipping walls are closing in. I have no escape— this is prison. Trapped in my mind's clawed vices with no way out. Except, my mind's fears have transcended into reality. My worst fear has come true and I had no time to prepare for it. The time is nigh. Ruin is, unfortunately, now.

Think, y/n. It's not so bad. I can just leave through the back door and tell my boss I'm sick again. The door is literally to my left.

But to get back to my apartment, I have to cross in front of the diner that's full of windows. Sal is here, meaning he's paying attention to everything in hopes of finding me... even though I told him I'm not here.I just know he's that kind of romantic, if he even qualifies as such.

He'd spot me in a heartbeat and that can't happen because maybe Vi's mask concealed Lexi who was hidden beneath, but he's about damn near fucked Vi. He knows her body better than she does herself— than I do. Fuck, I have so many different personas I can't even remember that they're all me.

Clusterfuck. That's what this is. A massive clusterfuck, all of my doing.

I'm going to have to bite the bullet. That's my only option. And by bite the bullet, I'm going to fight tooth and nail to keep this bit going. I should just admit the truth, but I'm not humble enough for that, apparently.

My chest begins to ache. It's a slow-to-develop pain that only catches my attention when it hurts a little too much. And then the shallow, short breaths follow. And then the phantom feeling of something lodged in my throat, blocking my airways and filling me with dread.

This is a panic attack, one that is long overdue. One that still can't breach the surface quite yet. I need to make sure I'm home free first— I can weep and be dismayed later. Because the harsh truth is, yes this fucking sucks, but it's not going to kill me. It's just hard for me and my body to truly get a grasp on that.

I swallow down the anxiety that's billowing in my body like linens ominously drying outside a house in the middle of nowhere. I take a couple deep breaths, calming the doubt and fear raging within. My limbs shake a little less, my breathing is better controlled, and my chest doesn't hurt half as much. The pain is still there, but this is bearable. I can do this.

I rifle through my cubby which doesn't give me much to work with. I don't have a change of clothes. I have nothing to hide me, not even a hoodie.

"You... good, y/n?"

I whirl around, hope scraping at the insides of my cranium. Fuck yes. Best lobotomy ever.

I could really cry right now because this is a clear sign that I'm not as alone as I think. Even if it feels like I am, even if my dear coworker Ophelia can't really help me out all that much, she can definitely help me in some way.

I don't have to girl boss everything on my own.

"Lia," I start with, breathless as I practically teleport over to her with the quickness of my panicked steps. "Do you have something I can change into? I can't explain right now but... I would really appreciate your help."

Her big doe eyes take me in curiously, one of her perfectly arched eyebrows raised in question. She bats her long lashes, seemingly processing what I've asked of her before giving me an answer.

"Um, I was planning on going out after my shift tonight? Would a dress work?" She grimaces a bit, probably worried that she won't be able to help me out because Ophelia is just like that.

"That would work fine!" I say excitedly, but think better of it, my hopes crumbling a bit. "But I don't want to take your outfit for the night. I can probably come up with something else."

Lia rolls her eyes lightheartedly, placing a hand on my shoulder. I follow the action, noting her long and sharp blood red nails. I gulp, looking back into her pretty ebony eyes. "Y/n, take what you need. You know Mike can drive me back home to get another outfit! We don't live too far away, and we don't need to be in Anaheim until 9 anyway. Do what you need to do-- you know I'm cheering for you, girl."

I grab onto her hand and hold back the intense admiration infecting my soul. I'm giving Ophelia the most visceral care bear stare I can possibly muster up and she notices, giving me a cute little upside down smile.

"You are an angel," I whisper, "And your future husband is too. Power couple of the heavens, really."

Lia giggles and bends her head down, forcing her pin straight black hair to fall into her face, thus accentuating the really eye-catching red money pieces that match her red nails. I aspire to be this woman. "It's not that serious, Ducks," she says, using my dads nickname for me that she overheard a couple months ago. She thought it was precious, so it stuck. "Let's go get you changed, 'kay?"

Change, I do. But I see where she was concerned about me wearing it too. It's for clubbing, cock-tailing, socializing for sure, but... I can make it work. I've got this. It'll be fine. Thank God I am an avid Doc Martens-wearer. Doc's go with absolutely anything.

Lia has taste too, it's a short, little red dress with spaghetti straps that flares out at the ends. It shows a lot of leg, but not much of anything else. I can't imagine how amazing she must look in this.

"You're super sure that you're okay wearing this?" Lia asks, looking over me. "It looks great on you, I'm inclined to tell you to keep it, honestly."

I scrunch up my face. "No, I'm giving it back to you tomorrow," I laugh gently, using my phone camera to try and get an idea of how I look. I can't see much, which is kind of a blessing because I might hate it and be too afraid to brave LA if I end up not liking it.

"I won't argue with you," Lia sighs, patting my back in a reassuring way. "So do you want to talk about what's going on?"

"Um," I murmur, a shiver running down my spine. I almost forgot why I'm having to do this. It feels like hours have passed, but it's only been five minutes at most. "It's very hard to explain, but I might have to get you or Mike involved, whoever's hosting today." I can't help but grimace as the words leave me, but it's the unfortunate truth that I'll have to talk to one or both of them. I'm ever so slowly hashing out a plan in my head.

Sal is undoubtedly going to ask about Lexi, and what the hell am I supposed to do whenever someone goes, "Lexi? No Lexi has ever worked here." So I have to bite the bullet, again, and stick around to at least inform Mike or Lia about that part of my major, gargantuan fuck up. That also means there's a good chance that Sal will see me, but he'll likely ignore my presence, and then I can slip away quickly.

"Mike is up front and hosting today," Lia says, frowning at me. She's so pretty, like if Marilyn Monroe was alternative. Goth mommy and whatever. No shame on my part.

The chef's booming voice carries into the break room, Lia's name floating along with it. She winces at the sound, flinching in surprise. She gives me a pitiful look, tilting her head almost as if to apologize for having to do her job. Poor little love, she is.

"Will you be able to talk with Mike?" She asks me, heading for the door.

I nod hesitantly. "Yea, I'll get to him. Thank you so much for all your help, Lia. I really appreciate you." I send her my most genuine smile, one that she returns.

"Anytime, y/n! You look beautiful, by the way. Go knock 'em dead, literally or figuratively!"

And she's gone, but she hyped me up in the gentlest way possible. Bless her dark, lovable heart.

I take a breath-- a deep, fortifying, 'ohfuckohfuck' breath that does nothing to calm my soul, but I try to trick myself into believing that it worked... at least somewhat. Then I move over to my work cubby (because we're all still in primary school according to my boss) and grab my old backpack that I bring every day. It's raunchy at best and holding on by a thread. I kept it from my high school days. It's a plain black Jansport with coffee stains on the bottom and questionable white splats that are front and center for everyone to see. I'm pretty sure it's just crusty white paint that I never bothered to peel off, but I won't correct anyone if they guess something else. What's the fun in that, right?

I open the zippers and dig in, working past a random beanie from winter, pads and tampons, and a makeup bag. All the way at the bottom, buried under my other things for protection, is my mask. I put it on then look down at myself one last time.

The flashy red of the dress I'm wearing does not match the deep violet of my mask but not everything can go right, so I'll take my little loss. Things could be worse-- oh wait, they are. Sal Fisher is outside this room. Whoops, forgot things were already devastatingly bad.

I run my fingers over the forehead of my mask, feeling that ache creep into my chest again. I wish things weren't going this way. I wish I was brave enough to go outside and just keep working. Because I'm undoubtedly going to lose my job after today. I'm backing myself into a corner, even risking my finances because of this guy that I'm too scared to face as my real self. I've reached peak pathetic.

My dad must be disappointed to have such an incompetent daughter. No wonder my mother and I don't speak anymore.

I swallow past the uncertainty, the guilt, and the unadulterated fear gnawing at my soul. Then I follow through with my plan by throwing my backpack onto my shoulder and pushing the back door open despite knowing that this is not worth it. It's not worth it at all.

I circle around the outside of the diner, heart rumbling like an earthquake as the putrid scent of garbage wafts into my nose from the dumpster I'm currently passing in front of. The sounds of cars honking, people laughing and chatting idly.

Los Angeles is the people's place. It hosts all necessary components of life, some more than others. Socialization, food. It's a dopamine powerhouse. But when it's me, when I've been living here for over a year and seeing the same things every single day, it's stripped me of all my feel-good chemicals. Especially right now when LA is only bringing me problems and trouble (Sal Fisher).

This doesn't feel real. I can't believe I'm doing this to myself. I can't quite wrap the fact around my head, that I'm about to be in Sal's general vicinity yet again. I thought I had time.

I turn the corner, coming out onto the sidewalk in front of the diner. I don't stop in my stride, eyeing my apartment building that isn't very far from me. A five minute walk. I'm almost home. Almost free. I just have to get inside the diner, unfortunately inform Mike of the tea, and hopefully dodge Sal. So long as I keep my eyes on the host table, I may not even have to see him. I might just be psyching myself out. Everything's going to be just fine!

My heart is in my throat, my limbs jittering nervously as I push the glass door open and look forward, noting the short line of people waiting for seats. Sal isn't one of them, so I assume he's been seated already.

I walk past the people in line, getting a few looks from them. That'd be the mask's fault.

Mike's looking down at his seating chart on the host table, most likely mapping out where someone could go whenever I stop in front of him, placing a hand on the table to discreetly get his attention.

He looks startled for a moment before tilting his head up, brows scrunched together as if to say 'The audacity!' but then he sees me and his eyes widen a bit. And then I'm not sure what his next expression says.

"What the--" he chokes out, "Shit! It's you? Hold on-- wait-- mind-fuck--"

I lift a finger to my lips, eyes wide as I hope he takes the note to shut up. Adrenaline is starting to spike in my veins and if he draws anymore attention to us, especially since my mask is already drawing enough, I'm going to piss myself right here. And sue him for public embarrassment, or whatever that thing is. Public defecation? No, that's public defamation... anyway.

Michael's mouth snaps closed, but he keeps watching me. I watch him. We just watch each other as I forget absolutely everything I had planned.

I swallow, blinking at my friend and coworker. "Mike," I say quietly. He flinches at the sound of his name. "I need you to do something for me and I am sincerely sorry about this but..."

"Yea, Yea, y/n-- um, what should I call you...?" He cuts himself off viciously, slapping a hand over his mouth. At least he cares.

I lean my forearms across the table, settling my weight against the front to relax myself at least a little bit. I'm so tense. I feel eyes on me. I need to get out of here.

"Don't call me that," I say lightheartedly, puffing out a breath. "Just call me Vi. For now." I lick my dry lips. Mike of all people finding out about my identity as VioletViolence is the very least of my worries. "There's a guy in here. He has blue hair, can't miss him. I'm sure you already know who he is. He's looking for a girl named Lexi and he'll probably ask his waiter about her. Just say that Lexi isn't here today, you don't have to answer anything else about her."

"I'm guessing... you're Lexi?" He winces, leaning forward a bit.

"Wow," I say sarcastically. "How did you figure that out?" I send him a little smile then focus on the task at hand yet again. "Anyway, I need you to be his waiter. Please. I'll take your entire shift on Friday. I will do anything." I tilt my head down, peering up at him through my lashes in an attempt to portray how badly I need this.

Mike's brows bunch together again and he mutters, "Yea, of course. Whatever you need. But it's-- he came in with the rest of The Faces. Do you want me to... entertain them too? Do they know about Lexi?"

The world stops turning. Everything pauses, no one's moving anymore and I feel like I'm going to vomit with fear, burst with excitement, and pass out right here from exhaustion. The plan I had is ruined, and I couldn't be more equally devastated and exhilarated about it. Ash is here. Larry's here, Todd too. What the hell is going on?

I blink, the action bringing me back to the present.

"Hey, is that Lia's dress--"

"The Faces are here?" I cut him off, holding a hand out in pause, trying to drill this information into my head. Trying to make it real so I can come up with a new plan.

Michael watches me like I'm stupid, a rueful expression on his boyish face. "Yes. I already said that they're here. Why are you wearing my girlfriend's dress?"

"Because we're fucking on the side and she came all over my work outfit." I watch as he makes his little offended face, and my tongue prods at my cheek as instant regret slaps me in the face. He's trying to help me, I shouldn't be giving him this attitude. "Sorry," I admit. "You know that's not true. I'm just-- I'm on edge."

"That's okay," he says hesitantly. "You know I'm going to get you back for that, anyway."

I pinch my lips together, accepting yet another minor defeat. "Fair." I shrug. "I was going to go back home and leave you to the wolves but... I'd rather risk myself. Ash is my best friend. You won't have to handle them alone now, so yay!" I give him a cheerful grin that I'm really not feeling. I even throw in jazz hands.

Michael runs his tongue over the surface of his teeth, clearly not looking forward to the fiasco I've dragged him into. "Alright," he settles on, sighing as he looks down at his feet while grabbing another menu. "Let's see how you manage to back yourself further into whatever shitty corner you've created. I'm eager."

"I'm sure," I grind out, knocking down all the fear that overtook me on my way here and replacing it with impenetrable, desperate yearning to find my friends. I finally cast my gaze around the diner, quickly zeroing in on the one head of blue hair in this entire building. They're seated at a booth all the way at the back of the restaurant and next to the bar, the one place that's away from most prying eyes. A request of theirs, I'm sure.

But my next question, now that I know everyone's here, what the hell are The Faces doing in Los Angeles? And why wasn't I told?

Ash didn't say a word to me. Do they not want me around? Maybe they don't like me as much as I thought they did. Maybe Ash would rather hang around with other friends than me. And that would make sense because we never see each other, besides Vegas, of course. But just thinking about it makes pain erupt throughout my entire body, a pang in my heart. Especially while watching the back of Ash's head tip down while Larry laughs in front of her. Sal and Larry, I can see them, but Todd and Ash are facing away from me.

Another deep breath.

"I'm going to head over there," I tell Michael, looking over to him again. He's watching me closely, his expression of pity mimicking Lia's from earlier. The sight makes me a little sick.

"Alright," he says gently. "I'm going to be there to take orders soon. I hope everything goes well. Don't be nervous."

I huff out a humorless laugh. "Are you and Ophelia psychic or something? Or is my face just that readable?"

He shrugs, grinning slightly. "I can't see your face, so I guess we're psychic. I'll be in your dreams tonight."

That makes me laugh. It wasn't forced or fake, it was genuine and I need that right now. I think Mike knows that too.

I start taking quick steps over to where The Faces are, nerves slapping at my insides to make me turn around and forget that I ever saw them. I'm attacking myself with my own mind, and my mind is attacking my body in turn. Mental illness is crazy, right? Death by anxiety and whatnot.

But, you know, I'm already here. My job is in purgatory, I'm five steps away from them and Larry has noticed my movement, his head twisting toward me to see who's growing near.

Poor Larry. When he sees me walking toward them, he shakes his head and rubs his eyes like he doesn't believe what he's seeing. He looks at me again, and that's when his eyes start to widen, when his jaw drops. And he doesn't say word, that open mouth just turns into the brightest smile I think I've ever seen.

Seeing his excitement makes my insides flutter about and I feel a little better about actually going over to them. Imagine I get there and they shoo me away? But I can tell that Larry won't. That look on his face screams barely held back hugs.

I gulp, trying to ignore my major cotton mouth. I need water. Or tequila. Something.

I also don't give my brain even a second to psych myself out. When I reach the table, I simply plop myself down beside Ash and act like it's a normal, every day thing for me to do.

All heads turn to me (Larry's never turned away from me to begin with) and then I hear a quiet, uttered, "Fuck" followed by incessant, eardrum bursting squealing in my ear.

Arms. A lot of arms. A ton of squeezing. Lots of kisses all over my mask and face. And all the love makes me think that my sweet Ash had a good reason for not informing me of her visit.

I struggle, but I throw my arms around Ash too, squeezing every little inch of her that I can get. Her sweet, coconut and strawberry scent overwhelms me and I feel so at peace. So calm. Home. Back in Nockfell. Comfortable.

Her hair is in my face and I know she's crying because my bare shoulders are wet, thanks spaghetti strap dress. I don't care though because I'm seeing Ash again much sooner than I imagined I would. I thought it would take us years to have some time together like we did in Las Vegas. And Ash is so emotional, I feel like she's being ripped apart by the sight of me alone-- that's both adrenaline-inducing and terrifying.

This is a nightmare, but a dream come true at the same time. I'm so glad that I was paranoid enough to force myself to tell Mike about the Lexi situation. Things couldn't be any better.

"Ash, fucking let go, man. It's my turn." Larry's voice is right next to me, and then another pair of hands that envelop my waist whole. I'm then yanked out of my best friends arms and spun around to face Larry who hugs me so tight that I have to stand on my tiptoes.

I shut my eyes, grinning as I reach my arms up his back, hugging him the best way I can as he nuzzles his face against my mask. The smell of cigarette smoke and pine trees lingers on his clothes, yet again overwhelming me with familiarity. The smoke is a more recent addition, but he's always had a unique scent to him that's always reminded me of Christmas in a way.

The scruff on his cheeks scratches against my jaw, his skin is warm, his grip tight. I really miss home... and LA is not home. Home is back with all of my friends. I don't want to stay here anymore. I don't want to be where they aren't.

Larry takes a deep breath into my shoulder, likely bathing in my comfort just like I did with him. Then he backs up, holding me at arms length and I look up with tears welling in my eyes no matter how much I wish they weren't there. I hate crying, especially in front of other people, but I'm just so happy. It's like the anxiety I felt while walking over here never existed.

"What the hell are you doing here, Vi!?" Larry exclaims, dragging his hands up my arms to cup my face in his large palms. "I thought you lived in Connecticut?"

I place my hand on top of his, a spark of what I thought was fantastical anxiety rushing through me at the instant fuck up I've just made. Again. Crap. I forgot that Ash told them I live in Connecticut...

"Uh," Ash voices beside us, her tone taking the form of the smartest kid in class who's about to correct a mistake. Todd-coded. "I said she's from Connecticut, not that she still lives there." Good save, Ash. "Word choice is important, Lar! Pay attention!"

Larry's eyes swing between Ash and I before settling on me, stars dancing in his irises. "Wait, so do you live in LA, then?"

I can't help the excited little grin that's slowly climbing onto my face. It's Larry's turn to squeal as he suddenly realizes.

I look back over to Ash, catching Sal's gaze momentarily before I look over at Todd to wave. He waves back at me, a soft and pleased smile on his thin lips.

"So," I say, letting go of Larry whenever he backs away from me. I sit beside Ash again, leaning against her side as she throws an arm around my shoulders. "Why are you guys here?"

Ash hisses, frowning suddenly. I frown back, wary of her reaction. "Crap!" she exclaims, rolling her eyes. "Well, I was going to surprise you and the guys. But I guess you ended up surprising us instead..."

"Oh, so it's not just y/n that we're visiting while we're here? You knew Vi would be here too?" Todd asks, chewing on his bottom lip contemplatively.

Another spark of nervousness. They're here for... fuck, all three sides of me are expected in this situation. This... maybe was not really worth it. I'm erasing all the sides of my corner. Everything's starting to get really small and very tight.

Ash side-eyes me, a discreet little look before she answers Todd. "Yea, but I'm not quite sure where she is in LA. I'm going to have to call her later to get some updates on her whereabouts."

"I could just call her now. I'm super excited to see her, I'm sure she'd love to meet Vi too-- oh, and to tell her why we're here!" Larry says, excitement making him shimmy around in his seat as he pulls out his phone.

My body reacts instantly, tensing up like a cat in shock. Ash jumps too, nearly leaping over the table to stop Larry. "No! She's working!" She yells. It's so loud that you'd think she's trying to flip Larry's phone away from him with sound waves alone. True Stranger Things style.

"Oh...kay..." Larry trails off, pulling his phone closer to him so that Ash can't reach. "It's not that serious. I'll call her later, then. What's your deal?"

I swallow. Her reaction was really too much, but at least she's trying to cover for me. I would've sat there and let Larry call while my phone went off in my pocket.

Ash clears her throat, sitting back now that she threw the scenario into the trash. It was rocky, but her deflection was successful. "I know, just don't bother my girl while she's making money," she says matter-of-factly, holding her head high.

I note the way Sal shakes his head across the table. I haven't acknowledged his presence, nor has he acknowledged mine. It's awkward for the most part, but I think that awkwardness is only stemming from me. He seems to be perfectly in control with his short sleeved, black Iron Maiden shirt that shows off his tatted arms. I guess the LA summer heat was too much for him to wear a hoodie for once.

His electric eyes meet mine, no emotion in the endless depths of his irises. Like he couldn't care less that I'm here, which sounds a lot like him. And still, I fidget in my seat under his gaze. Can't help myself.

The edges of his dagger tattoo peek out from behind his hair, the shape of his Adam's apple clear due to the sun shining in through the window, casting shadows in all the right places. Necklaces are around his neck, some kind of silver chain and and old, really intricate cross necklace hanging right below it. And then his hand comes into view, the one that folded into a fist as a result of my touch just weeks ago in this exact restaurant.

There's something different though as he moves to grab onto the drink in front of him, dragging it closer.

The bottom of his prosthetic lifts as he sips from his straw, but that's when I notice what's different. It's a new tattoo-- Saniderm wrapped around his hand. It looks like... a skeleton hand tattooed onto his own. It's pretty sick and I'm so tired of him having great taste in art. Damn. Now I have a terrible excuse to stare at him some more when I shouldn't look anywhere near him at all.

On the other hand, have I ever mentioned how much of a blessing Michael is?

"Hi, everyone," his cheerful voice effectively distracts me from ogling Sal. I look over to my friend, noting his pink cheeks. Huh. "I'll be taking over as your waiter tonight. Your waitress had to leave," he glances at me as if to tell me that I made a good call by stepping out when I did. That's exactly the moment I realize that we're sitting in my section of the diner. Talk about a close call.

Okay, I should get the hard part over for him right? To thank him. I've got this. "Oh, hey, Mike!" I say, "Long time no see."

Poor Mike looks at me like a deer caught in headlights. "Hey... Vi..." he says quietly. Oh, Michael, please don't crap out on me now... I'm going to have to buy this man a cake for carrying me like this.

I smile at him awkwardly, trying to bypass this horrible excuse of an excuse that he and I are about to do horrible improv for. "So, how's Lexi?" I don't dare look a Sal whenever I say the name, but I do feel a shift in the energy at the table. "It's been weeks since I last saw you guys."

"Lexi doesn't work here anymore," Michael spits out nervously, sweat beginning to build on his forehead. Oh no, don't fucking fumble the bag, Mike!

I give him a look. One that has so many emotions and so many questions, but I just force out a simple, "What?" because what else do I say to that? Things are already beginning to go terribly. But it's okay. I'm a pathological liar at this point, and a catfisher? Maybe? Ha... Cat-FISHER.

I'm going to have a panic attack.

Michael pinches his lips together, red-faced as he glances at Sal. I turn my gaze to Sal too, noticing the way he's eyeing Mike like a hawk.

"Lexi is my girlfriend and she doesn't work here anymore." Michael says, his tone brave and assertive, but his facial expression says an entirely different thing.

Great heavens. Okay, so he's radically screwing everything up but that's okay— I'm a flexible person. He's... doing his best. I can work with this. I hope.

I have this image of him and I duking it out in my head. I have him by the collar, shaking him around like a ragdoll while I scream in his face that he's fucking up the plan. And in my mind he's just taking it because he's playing pure sub right now. I'm not even this submissive-- Michael is straight up breaking the BDSM spectrum.

I shove down my nerves and tilt my head at him. "Okay," I start with, slowly, feeling out what little room I have to work with. "I already knew she was your girlfriend," I say, raising my eyebrows even though he can't see. Saying this feels less incriminating for some reason. But I notice Sal snap his head down to the table. I almost feel bad. "But why doesn't she work here anymore?"

Michael looks off to the side, tapping his fingers against the menus in his arms. "Um, she's... she is..." I narrow my eyes at him. He's not even answering the question. I try to communicate with him through eye contact, bellowing at him to not. Fumble. The. Bag.

He gapes at me like a fish, our intense eye contact freaking him out even more. I sigh to myself. He fumbled whatever bag I'm going on about before he even got to our table.

He finally finds his voice after a second and says, "Lexi is working. At a... sperm... bank."

It takes every little inch of my being not to burst into tears. Holy hell. If anything I'm glad he fucked this up because the sperm bank excuse is hilarious no matter how you look at it. Even better is that it's so ridiculous and random that it's going to distract the entire table from the way he's royally screwing up this conversation.

Ash snorts beside me. Larry chokes on his coke. Todd is silent and so is Sal. Maybe the sperm bank thing will officially scare Sal away from Lexi. Yea-- this could work.

"That's a unique job," I struggle to push out, my voice wavering despite trying to forget what Mike just said. But it's hovering in my mind, like old memes from Vine that still make me cackle to this day. I really wish someone would have caught this entire interaction on video.

Michael glances to Sal again. And that's when I turn to find that the bluenette is glaring at my coworker with his arms crossed over his chest, a dangerous glint in his pretty eyes. Wow. That's a scary look, one that he hasn't even pulled out on me yet.

Mike is gaping again, trying to get words to, you know, word. I try to help him by saying, "I hope she likes it there! That's a big deal." But the words don't register in his mind. I can tell by the look of terror on his face, his gaze still glued to Sally.

My friend takes another second to gather himself, and right as a syllable leaves his lips-- one that he used his one working brain cell to come up with-- Sal interrupts him. He took perfect advantage of Mike's vulnerability.

"I'm not sorry for flirting with your girlfriend."

My eyes squeeze shut as butterflies slap at the lining of my intestines. This is ridiculous and I shouldn't feel flattered. I tilt my head down for a moment, trying to gather my wits. I figured out everything for Michael and I, but I didn't take Sal's response into account. I didn't think he'd have a response to begin with. I never would have thought he'd come up with this either.

"We'll, um," I say hoarsely, clearing my throat to regain my voice, but my heart is flitting about with excitement. I wish Sal never would have spoken. I look up at Mike, sending him a dismissive smile. "We'll order in a little bit. I'm still not sure about what I want. Thanks, Mike."

I've never seen someone scurry away so quickly before in my life.

"Is Lexi the chick you were trying to see over here?" Larry asks as soon as Michael's gone. I bite down on the inside of my cheek, watching as Sal glares at his step-brother. Yikes...

"I'm gonna head to the bathroom," I say, scooting out of the booth before anyone can stop me. I need to not be here right now. Ash is quick to stand up behind me, grabbing onto my hand. I turn, fearful that she's going to stop me, but she just smiles and juts her head forward, signaling me to keep walking.

I hope she doesn't ask me about Lexi. You couldn't even beat this information out of my dead body.

Ash and I take a singular step toward the bathroom, only to get stopped by my least favorite customer. I just want to die at this point. The stress is not worth anything. Not at all.

I've said before that many of the men that come into the diner are assholes of the patriarchy, the ones that tell me to stop talking and make them a sandwich, or comment about women's bodies. The shit that ticks me off beyond belief.

This man in particular smells like mildew and three years of straight sleep and bad breath. He's also not a looker, mind you. And then he's an asshole on top of it? I hate when my boss sends me to his table.

Even worse is watching him eye me after calling out to Ash and I with the words, "How much do you charge?"

My eyes narrow and the boys go quiet behind us. We're close enough for them to hear, especially for Ophelia to hear behind the bar.

She glances up at me, cleaning a glass and frowning.

I look back at the man. I never bothered remembering his name. "Excuse me, sir?" I ask, confused. I don't want to converse with this dickface.

"You're dressed like a whore so you gotta be selling yourself right?" he continues, a humorless chuckle following the grubby words.

I open my mouth then snap it shut, heat taking over my body. I'm embarrassed, really insecure about myself now, and pissed off. He thinks he can just say shit like this to anyone? What a pathetic joke.

Usually I can't do anything about this man since I'm the one serving him, but he doesn't know who I am and I'm not working at the moment. I can reign whatever hell that I want.

But I'm also exceptionally tired. Tired of this horrible job and little pay. Tired of holding up some persona that's already beginning to crash around me. Just tired.

"I'd rather look like a supposed whore than look like I just stepped out of the dumpster, sir. Have a day," I say dismissively. I don't have time for him and I've said my piece. If I go on any further, I'll get kicked out anyway and I've already given my coworkers enough trouble today.

'Have a day' is my favorite thing to say to customers who piss me off because they don't know if I forgot the 'good' or purposefully left it out. It's ominous and vaguely threatening.

Ash and I go to the bathroom and we don't stay there long. Neither of us talk. She just waits for me, like she knew I needed space but that I also needed her companionship. Just a moment away from the mess. Silence. Which is so much more than appreciated, I can't even begin to explain how much I adore my best friend.

She watches me wash my hands through the mirror, her arms crossed over her chest and a content smile on her lips. As we start to walk out, she says, "I'm not sure how long you'll be able to keep up the lie about y/n." and she's right. I'm going to face a dead end soon here. "You're obligated to have a sleepover with me tonight so we can come up with a plan, and so you can answer some major questions I have about you right now. My spidey senses are tingling super hard."

Her hand rubs my back and I nod, smiling thankfully at her. Of course she has questions. My entire presence here is questionable right now.

We resurface next to the bar, but looking up at where our booth is shows that it's empty. I'm about to voice my confusion to Ash, but then I notice Lia running around the bar to get to us.

My eyebrows scrunch together as my coworker stops in front of me, eyes on Ash before they focus on me. She mulls over her thoughts for a moment, gaping just like her boyfriend does. Did the boys do something bad?

"We had to... We kicked Sally Face out," is what she says, shocking both me and Ash.

"What?" Ash asks, startled. "What happened?"

Ophelia blinks at Ash, cheeks turning a light shade of pink. "He, uh, he walked up to that... that guy at the bar. Kicked his stool out from underneath him. Then he asked me for a drink. Malibu and pineapple."

Ash sighs and I blink at Lia. I don't even know what to think. Did Sal do that for me? And to ask for my favorite drink on top of that...

No. It's impossible. There's no way he would. He just did it for the sake of feminism. That feminism that is nonexistent when it comes to me. Yea, he definitely didn't do that to avenge me. And he was probably just in the mood for alcohol and pineapple juice right? He could never remember the one drink I ever brought up around him. There's no way.

"Sal doesn't even drink all that much," Ash hisses. "What the hell is he doing?" She bites down on her thumb nail, free hand on her hip.

I swallow down all the emotions building up in me. There are so many that I don't even know how to distinguish a single one right now. This is too much. This entire day is too much.

"Okay," I whisper to myself. "Thanks, Lia," I say gratefully. "And thank Mike for me, too, please. I'm going to get everyone out of here before-- yea." I nod to myself, but it isn't very reassuring.

Lia grabs my hand. "We didn't call the police because that asshole had it coming, but someone else might have. It's better to go now."

I nod again, taking yet another deep breath before guiding Ash to the front doors of the diner. The boys are standing right outside, no doubt waiting for Ash and I.

I feel very similar to the way I did when Sal ended our shit-uationship. I'm so confused and so hopeless, but hopeful. So pained, but relieved. I don't know how to handle the way I feel. I can't work myself out of this awful situation now because he's here. He's here and his hair is billowing softly in the wind, showing off his tattooed neck. And a cigarette is between his index and middle finger as he looks out at the jam-packed street. And then his boot is stomping out the butt of his cigarette on the ground.

The nail in the coffin is when he bends over to pick up the cigarette butt and throw it into the trashcan right outside the diner. He would be perfect if he wasn't such an emotionless prick.

I want to cry. I want to feel him again. I want to shoot him with a paintball gun one more time. I want to run my fingers over all his tattoos. I want him to shiver in fear and pleasure because of me. I hate him so much that it's become obsessive.

I lick my lips as I come to a top in front of my friends, more notably, right in front of Sal.

He turns away from the trashcan behind him, his shoulder-length hair following his movements. When he notices me, he stops and stares disinterestedly. The action is so forced though that it feels like it's hiding something else. Like he doesn't want me to know what he just did in the diner.

I watch him. My eye contact is a threat, a warning, a question, begging. Everything, I try to show him through my gaze.

And then I nod at him subtly despite myself. Even if it wasn't for me, he put that guy in his place and I think that's something to appreciate. But at the end of the day, he still left me upset and he's an asshole so I can't find it in myself to physically tell him thank you. The nod will do.

I turn my attention to the rest of The Faces. "I can make brunch in my apartment if that works with y'all?"

And that's how I've made another mistake today. That's why The Faces are walking down the streets of Los Angeles, my apartment just two buildings away.

There's so much wrong with this decision I've made. I should have never invited them over. What if dad is home? He shouldn't be-- but still. There's so much that could go wrong.

But the walk is going disturbingly well. Ash and Larry ooh and ahh at the streets of Los Angeles— which are normal to me. But I understand the charm too. I was very fond of LA when I first came here.

We walk into my apartment building, everyone speaking a little quieter as we traipse through Lobby. I don't speak, I just listen. And I take it that Todd and Sal are doing the same.

My apartment building is nothing special. It's boring, it's the lowest end of mainstream you can get. It's like a 90's apartment in Manhattan, but make it modern and LA. To put it short, it's the cheapest Dad and I could find here.

Having The Faces step into my territory feels like a time bomb ticking down the last few seconds. It's scary, and it puts me in a vulnerable position. I don't have much of a choice— I'm the one who thought of this idea. And I feel like I owe it to my friends to make them something to eat after they got kicked out of the diner. Not that it was my fault, but it was my customer's fault. I feel guilty for some unreasonable reason.

There's always risk though, and I run through my list of said risks as we take the elevator to my apartment. Being in someone's living space is daring, considering that family stuff is all around. Photos on the wall, artwork with family name's on them, doctor appointments and reminders on the refrigerator. Everything is risky, risky, risky.

Lucky for me, dad and I still haven't quite settled in yet. It's been a year, but we're also both constantly moving around. Dad is in hotels for weeks on end and I work most days. We unloaded and fixed our necessities, but other than that, our walls are bare and nothing of note is on our refrigerator. I should be fine.

We finally empty out into the hallway that leads to my apartment and I have to swallow down the anxiety rushing through me. Nothing has gone wrong and I can only hope that the last leg of this walk will go well for me. I just want one thing to go right today, just one. That's all I'm asking.

I get to my door, I shakily slide my key into the lock, and I open it and let all my friends in, watching their eyes bounce around the living room. I nearly slam the door shut once everyone is safe and inside.

I got my wish. Thank you to whoever granted me a little bit of peace on this unfortunate day.

"You need to get a new carpet."

It's the second time I've heard him speak today. The raspy, monotonous, alto tone of his makes me pause. He wasn't insulting, the way he said that was just commentary. But his voice alone feels like a declaration of war and all the panic and fear I've been enduring for the past— what? Half hour?— is replaced with some kind of desirous agony. Like I've been waiting for him to just... just speak.

"You have a problem with everything, don't you?" I respond, my voice biting into the stale air of my living room. I should've simply asked why he felt that way, but I have reasons. For example, the shit I've put up with today has me on edge. Another reason is Sal bombarding me on all ends without him even realizing it, then being so tense with all these horrible decisions I'm making. I'm really itching for a fight right now and I know I can get it from him. I can practically feel my eyes dilating with the excitement that's ransacking my body at the mere prospect of an argument.

Sal's head turns over his shoulders, body somewhat rigid. One hand in his pocket, the other with the fresh tattoo resting at his side. His eyes are narrowed, scrutinizing me and no doubt wondering who the hell I think I am.

"There's a giant fucking stain on your black carpet," he snaps, gesturing his tatted hand at the light green splatter that dad fussed me for weeks ago. That time I was watching The Faces' Youtube video and spilled my damn mint chocolate chip ice cream. When this entire thing between Sal and I was started. Because he had to go and judge me without getting to know me first. "Be happy I even mentioned it," he mutters, tone clipped.

"You think I didn't notice?" I laugh humorlessly. I wasn't lying when I said he has a problem with everything. Seriously— he just stepped foot into my home and has something negative to say about it. "And why don't you guess who's fault it is that the carpet is stained, huh?" The words rush past my lips, all hardly held back fury and expectation for the worst.

Sal tilts his head in a way that begs me to try him again, then turns his entire body to me. He shuts his eyes and holds up a hand, pausing before saying, "It surely isn't my fault if that's what you're implying." He even adds a snort at the end.

"Actually," I say cheerily, chin up and head high because it's quite literally all his fault that I dropped my ice cream whenever I heard him talking about me all those weeks ago. "Yea it is. I was sitting right there," I point to the edge of the sofa nearest the stained part of the carpet. "While listening—"

I feel like I've been punched in the stomach, and I did it to myself. Again.

How could I be so stupid? Here I am, openly and happily about to expose my true identity just to make a point. Just to be right. To win. To gain some catharsis from a meaningless argument.

I snap my mouth shut, swallowing over the relentless pounding of my heart. I blink at Sal who's waiting expectantly for me to finish what I was saying. What do I say? How do I save myself?

My palms sweat, my legs quake. Oh, this is so bad. Is this my real downfall? Is this where I break? It's going to happen. I'm going to pass out or have a psychotic break. Maybe I'm going insane— maybe I've been clinically insane for weeks now. At least I could plead not guilty at my murder trial. I've had a lot of murder on my mind today, haven't I?

But there's a knock at the door and bless the heart of whoever is about to punch my door hinges off. Any other situation and I'd be losing my mind over someone knocking so hard, but my savior is behind this hunk of wood.

I let out a shaky breath and tilt my head downwards, pretending like I'm too fed up to continue my argument. It's perfect. The best excuse.

But Sal's eyes burn into me, the scrutinizing, heavy blue trapping me in my own guilt. A narrow waterway hidden behind the confines of his prosthetic, haunting me day and apparently at night too. I find myself stuck, my gaze piercing his and waiting for something that will never come. I don't even know what that something is.

"Never mind," I grunt, spinning on my heels and taking a singular step toward my door.

I twist the knob, relieved by the silence behind me. No one cares enough to ask what that was about. I escaped... somehow.

And then I swing the door open, gaze up at the last person I expected to see, hear a resounding and excited, "Bitch!" and intellectually (smartest decision I've ever made) slam the door back in their face.

Oh no. Oh no, oh fuck.

I forgot.

____________

A/N:::::: 50K is such a dream come true and i really wish i could find more words to explain how excited and whole i feel. when i first started writing at 13, i was also reading on wattpad and fanfiction.com. I saw all these writers getting so many views and comments about their works, and i wondered if that would be me some day. i worked hard for the first couple years of my writing career and my only reader was my lovely sister (thank you amititty) and i realized that i needed to do something different. i started practicing more, and then i got into fanfiction rather than just fiction. and that's when something changed. i'll never forget the day when maybe today got 1k views-- i cried and wept like a baby for HOURS because it meant the entire world to me. little 18 year old ryver had no fucking clue that we'd get this far. that 1k on my trial book would turn into 50k on the next. i'm in tears typing this right now, in disbelief. every single one of you are my reason for writing, for brainstorming, for getting through my day... i consider you guys in everything i do. all the love in this world-- every ounce of affection, of adoration, of admiration-- does not compare to how special all of you are to me. you are all so dear to me, my friends and penpals that keep me going and remind me that the world isn't all bad, that not everyone is bad. so thank you for following me down this road and i hope we can continue like this. i wish we could all stay this way forever! but maybe, just maybe, i'll get to sign published copies of my books for you guys someday. get to follow through on my dream to hug all of you. there's never a way to tell what the future holds, but i believe it's pretty bright. thank you. i love you all with all the working neurons in my brain and numerous blood cells in my body <333

so about this chapter-- i have been looking forward to it since the very first chapter of this story. a lot of things have changed since then, including the chapter, but i still think the contents are a nice surprise and fucking HILARIOUS >.< i just hope you guys like it too! it was kind of hard to get out because i had all these ideas and images and feelings that i desperately needed to portray perfectly, but some things are just unable to be captured by words. my goal was to get as much as i was feeling onto paper (or computer?), so i hope you guys feel all the fear, desperation, and admiration going on! i deleted, retyped, and deleted again so many scenes and parts of this. and jesus christ this is an exceptionally long author's note MY BAD

anyway, as always, you guys own my heart and i love you to infinity and beyond!! i'll link pictures of y/n's red dress and sal's tattoo below <3

p.s. i have an announcement coming soon! nothing big, but i am trying something new so stay turned :3

#sal fisher #sally face #larry johnson #ash campbell #todd morrison #travis phelps #enemies to lovers #sally face fandom #sally face fanfiction #fanfic

[starfilled-galaxy]

Uh uh introductions for the alters + system info bc we're a bit more comfy now (also I'll put some info I've said before so I can link it on pinned lol)

We're a proxy system (linked) which means there's a permanently frontstuck host and instead of switches we only blur/blend Each alter is associated with 1 emoji that we tag and emoji combos = blurry/blended

Collectively sex-repulsed asexual, also collectively share the same neurodivergencies (adhd, autism, social anxiety) tho some of us have more heightened nd traits than others

Quoigenic! Which means we don't know if we're traumagenic or endogenic or mixed origin or smth else and honestly we don't fucking care to find out

We use I/me when talking regularly but we/our when talking about the system as a whole

Usually we use the term "alter" but we dont mind sysmate/system member/headmate etc, alter is just the shortest lol

Alter intros under cut bc it's kinda long!

💫 - Niko! Not a fictive, just decided to steal the name from niko oneshot. Alterhuman (otherhearted cat). Perma frontstuck host... Genderfluid, prnfluid, grayro gaybian

🌌 - Aster. He/him, no fucking clue on gender or romanticity but he's probably the one with most of the space related labels I use lol also alterhuman

🩸 - Fang. I know the least about them but they uh... mm definitely has the worst mental state of everyone. dont wanna get too into it but they Are Not Ok. maybe they're the trauma holder? And they're also alterhuman :3

and the fictives.... there's a lot of these guys ;w; especially omori fictives, probably bc its on my mind 24/7

🏀 - (rw) Kel. Bigenderfluid, usually he/him but sometimes uses she/her and very occasionally ae/aer and xe/xyr. No idea on the romanticity but he is dating the Sunny fictive so um... Also he seems to have an unhealthy attachment to the rw Hero fictive like actually getting depressive when he's not around

Genuinely fuck off if you treat me/source like a meme stop it I'm a person too you assholes -🏀

🌹 - (rw) Hero. Transmasc, he/him. This the bitch that keeps flickering from existence... nobody (including him) knows why help

Uhhhh source is suppose to be 19-20 but wow I do not feel that old, probably bc the body is a minor -🌹

🔪 - Sunny. Trigender/boygirlenby, he/she/they. He fucking loves scene, also he apparently introjected as like post-game (true ending) so his sight is kinda blurry in his left eye (yes im aware canon sunny got his right eye stabbed.... its just a source-fictive disconnect ig)

🧡 - (hs) Kel. Guy, he/him. Cis doesnt feel right but he's not a transguy so he's just kinda... neither lol. Yeah there's two Kels. And two Heros. dw about it. They just share names. Anyway he's silly he's the little baby of the alters I think he's the one who was blended with me when I felt the visceral need to make a pillow fort a few weeks back

🍳 - (hs) Hero. Transmasc, he/him. He's shy... surprisingly more of the "quiet type" than Sunny lol

🦴 - Hector (dog). DOGGY!! Kel and Hero's lil shiba inu is a fictive! He/him, no gender just dog. Not to be confused with agender, just unlabeled. He's very excitable and BARKBARKBARK!!

🍃 - Hollyleaf. Wow omg a not-omori fictive?? no way... Christmasgender/xenogender, she/her. Kitty cat...

🦁 - Lionblaze. Can't figure out his gender but uh he/him. He's silly and fluffy and honestly kinda similar to both of the Kel fictives personality-wise

I know source was written in a super boring way but it still makes me sad to be called boring :< -🦁

AND UH YEA THATS IT !!

#niko.txt #💫🏀🌹🦁 #proxy system

[the-skin-inthe-bath-is-mine]

This is a personal project that I'll be embroidering and sewing by hand.

Okay so I'm planning the 20cm test before finishing the 10cm tests just because it takes a while to polish off the digital planning. Gives me something to do when I can't access my embroidery stuff. I have three characters in mind just because I'm currently limited to yellow/blonde hair + pale completion with fabric. I'm only gonna pick one to do for now. Doing an established character just in case I grow a pair and decide to sell it if the project turns out okay. Three different characters from three different fandoms+ rambling under the cut. I'll most likely be posting progress for whoever is picked like with most of my projects so if there's any bias for who anyone wants to see lmk. The possible test subjects are Satan (OBM) Raphael (WHB) and Nazuna Nito (Enstars)

Used my fandom blogs @ for the drawings out of habit. Oh and these all have some type of animal ears because I think it's cute. I wanna use snaps magnets or velcro to hold everything in place but I'm not sure yet.

Satan - Obey Me

The only one who looks halfway decent because I've been drawing him since 2021. My goal is to make a large scale Thirteen plushie with a lamb theme similar to the middle Satan. I also really don't like it when people delude Tanny to cat guy but I am a cat guy so he's most likely getting optional kitten ears if picked. The plain bows would just be plain embroidery but if the lamb design is picked I'll be embroidering fabric on top of fabric. I don't know what the methods called. I'm not a professional. I have an idea on how to make Satan's tail but would be weird to explain??? Possibly my favorite but that's just because the Obey Me brain worms run deep. Also the only one I feel confident in making clothes for.

Raphael - What in Hell is Bad

Look. We aren't gonna talk about why I'm playing the horny demon game. I don't understand why I play either. Anyway. I love Raphael's design too bad I wanna choke him in the most violent lest sexual way possible. This design would involve a lot of sewing fabric on fabric which I really don't mind. I have an idea on how to make little bandages that a kinda wanna tryout. The only thing is I'd like to add beads to the embroidery for his piercings. A bit of a price to pay for only doing one eye but I think it's worth it. This one specifically will also be good practice for using metallic embroidery thread. I'm torn between bunny and the fake horns??? Raphael is just annoying angry rabbit chewing on power cords coded. The only problem is I'd probably wanna make the other two dick heads eventually and *vague choking gestures* why are those freaks so damn pretty. Overall a lot of fun different textures to play with. The only thing is I probably won't post much about making him aside from helpful design components because dude is from a R18 game.

Nazuna Nito - Ensemble Stars

I actually already own a few Enstars plushies and plan on making both Jin and Akiomi for the larger scale tests. So. Yea. I don't think I need anymore??? The first is the easiest with the whole bunny thing. Probably gonna sew the fabric for the stomach art on and embroider around it. Second is loosely based on Nazuna's first 5* event card. It was the event that was going on when I started playing Enstars. Trying to figure out the game while playing Love it Love it still haunts my nightmares. The final one is based on his recent scout 5* I need to work on coloring gemstones but I think it'd translate nicely to embroidery. This design is gonna be the easiest out of this bunch. The most complicated thing will probably be color matching embroidery thread.

#I'll decide to add fandom tags later #do I want the main tag to know my sins? probably not. #🐑 screaming into a cave #angy eepy

[frostbite-the-bat]

no but genuinely. i love shadow filbo dearly. he means a lot to me.

he marks a time for me where i began embracing what i like just... for the sake of it!

he embodies the things that inspired me to draw online in the first place. hell, sparklecat characters with bangs have made me stop cutting my hair. i haven't cut my hair properly since. just because i wanted the same bangs, not knowing how hair works. now i have what is best described as messy fluttershy hair. to many people just how long my hair is, is what defines me when they see me and my hair is in a way special to me.

and again - he was what inspired me to draw. in class i'd be drawing my own sparklecats at the age of like 8, with bangs and wings and little companions that sit on clouds that rain hearts. (and bolts and skulls when ANGRY!)

i put rainbows on everything. i thought nyan cat was the embodiment of everything good in the world. i listened to nightcore versions of songs only. i say, as i am listening to nightcore, right now.

because of all these old classic animation memes and sparklefurs and silly scene and emo song flash animations i'd find... i'd pick up ms paint and draw. i imagined just how i'd animate, finding even the simplest methods absolutely mesmerising. there is something to be said about me being this young with internet access - because it very much so had it's negative effects. not me watching fetish videos at the age of 8 just because it had pokemon in it. yea that did not have any lasting effects.

but despite all this shit - it raised me! and even just a few years later... like.. 2015 when i began posting online on deviantart for the first time, not being just a lurker... learning how The Computer works better - not only drawing on paper anymore and gaining more and more interest towards digital art... i was already nostalgic towards these earlier days. but still living IN it, y'know?

just having fun, doing my own thing! isn't that what art is all about?

well. then the cringe culture nation attacked. severe bullying at school. and in general, just shame - which i am still fighting in certain aspects. but it's a bit more complicated than just "shame". (more so fear of Things.)

i'd look back at things with either genuine "cringe" or a distaste. how DARE these people have fun? because deep down, i was simply jealous.

if i was going to reference anything old like this, like classic animation memes, it was framed as "JOKE" "NOT SERIOUS" because i feared i would be harassed, made fun of, or people would thing THAT is the best of my artistic abilities. but... it's not like that.

and now, more and more people are embracing this. and it makes me so happy. and shadow filbo helped me fight off these fears a lot and just let me love what i love and be myself.

maybe it's not an ""aesthetic"" that completely defines me, maybe it IS a tik tok trend to do nowadays - but i don't care. without any of this i wouldn't be here. those were my first inspirations. silly colorful cats animated to crunchy mp3s of songs using movie maker and 3 (three!) frames drawn in ms paint. it had so much charm. it had so much genuinity. and i could feel it even back then.

without it i might've not been here as i am now. there are so many things that go into this, of course. but i simply would not be the exact way i am. and i dunno. that's something to think about.

thank you so much, shadow filbo. one "mistake" with you i've had was thinking i should be a good creator of something and respond to every fan and fanart, which only stressed me out. i have... opinions! about being recognized in various places and, as some dub, a "NICHE INTERNET MICROCELEBRITY" (nothing against you fox </3).... yeah! not a fan.

another mistake was dubbing him as a "joke" always. and... he is! he is humorous! i am a jokey person! i like crunchy shitposts! i like being the reason people laugh! i will go to certain levels to even ridicule myself just for the bit, and i don't mind it. i'm hyper(active) and i am just a jokey person, that's that. but... him being called a joke was honestly just a shield from people taking him too seriously.

if people were to mock me for being nostalgic for nightcore, and rainbows, and edgy amvs, sparkledogs, scene culture and clothes, rave songs... all this!

but... no! people loved it! people loved it so much, it moved THEM to create art!

me, referencing things that made ME inspired to draw all those years ago - then inspired OTHERS to draw other things. to embrace themselves. to have fun. to connect.

it means so much to me. it's a bit odd to comprehend, too.

but it means the world to me. sorry if i am ever annoying about shadow filbo, and is often the first thing i bring up when bugsnax is brought up - but he is the highlight of my experience with bugsnax.

thank you so much, shadow filbo. and me and my wretched little claws, of course. for making them. and those that inspired me. those old friends i lost along the way, too. and those, that inspired those that inspired me. and so forth.

thank you.

#shadow filbo #important #<- i just don't want to lose this mess of a ramble. #i could add so #so much #but i'm not going to otherwise i'd have several long tangents. especially mixing like. queerness and growing up trans and a furry and then #nonhuman shit into this #and the bullying thing. and being in a country thats... yea. where theres even less people like you #finding a home in places like this. yeah. (happy kinda yea)

[fatuismooches]

I'M DYINGGG FROM ARLECCHINO AND HER LEAKS. Also a tiny bit heartbroken from Lynette's hangout

I can't wait for Arlie release.. ;; esp. bc 4.5 doesn't look too promising as an update. I hope her banner will ft. Lynette and Fremi, bc I want both C6. I also hope she'll have special intentions with them as boss, like Scara w/ Raiden or Azhadaha w/ Zhongli bc I know damn well I'll battle her with Freminet.

I also wonder what is exactly her 'true side' Wanderer mentioned. Buuut since we've gathered here for fluffy harbingers, I can say one thing for sure: You wouldn't want to mistreat Arlecchino's lover in any way. She has eyes and ears basically anywhere, thanks to HotH spies, who, in addition to their own mission, have a special order to watch over her lover and make a report, if something bad happens to them. But if someone actually I'll-treats them, Arlecchino will always want to deal with that person herself. And trust me, they wouldn't like what's going to happen..

-🥀

The one thing you never want to do if you work for the Fatui, is anger any of the Harbingers. Sure, some are certainly more likable than others, but in the end, they are still that - Harbingers. Whose morals are more gray than the average person, and has no problem resorting to more... unsavory methods if pushed. Arlecchino, of course, is no different. Sure, her calm facade may seem impenetrable, but it can change if you were to ever be threatened. She doesn't show it at first, no. Her expression remains seemingly undisturbed as she works out her plan of action.

But once she has the perpetrators in the palm of her hand, they won't live to tell the tale, having gone 'poof' without a trace, their disappearance sending out a message to anyone who dares to harm the Knave's beloved. Once Arlecchino returns to you after whatever she's done, her 'normal' personality is back, knowing that you are safe and sound with her. You've long stopped trying to ask her what exactly she was doing and settle with her gentle kisses of reassurance.

(I AM ALSO DYING FROM ARLIE LEAKS. SHE IS TOO MAJESTIC. Lynette's hangout also made me sad. Her backstory is still so sad and also the poor cats :( I also hope the siblings are on her banner! I have both of them like c0 and i would love to build them and put them on the same team. Ahh i am so excited for 4.6... and yea 4.5 is pretty dry but I don't really mind lol. We have kitty event at least!! I am also very curious as to what her 'crazy' side will be, considering how calm she's appeared so far. Oooh i am dwjdbewdb!!!)

#smooches talks #🥀 anon #arlecchino love notes <3 #FROTHING AT THE MOUTH FOR ARLECCHINO. #SHE IS SO COOL............ SO AMAZING....... #waiting for the voicelines leaks now... #i love fluffy harbingers but i also love them being scary af solely to protect their beloved #its so... the taste is delicious

[ninlilwinds]

hello! I'm new to your blog so uh yea hi :D

this is my first time doing a request so I'm kinda nervous hehe not to mention I'm very new to Tumblr as well

I really like your writing style and wanted to see how you'd work with my request(if you want to ofc you can just ignore me if you'd like)

so I'm wondering how would the Genshin men react with a child!Koala(from One Piece)-like fem!Reader?(or gn if you're comfier with that)

in case you don't watch One Piece or forgot(because know I did, it's been a while), Koala as a child was enslaved and due to fear she'd smile no matter what even when she's injured

if possible with Diluc, Zhongli, Dainsleif, Alhaitham, Tighnari, Ayato and Thoma? and anyone else you'd want to add? I tried finding your rules or do's and don'ts post but I can't find it sorry if I broke any or if there's too many characters

sorry for the long message ><

Fem!Child!Reader x Genshin Men: Smile Through the Pain

Hello! Thank you so much for choosing me to do this request, I'm honored. I personally have not watched One Piece, but I looked up some more about Koala's personality. It became more of a reader cope with troubles by smiling, I hope you don't mind. Anyways, I am not very familiar with Alhaitham's character, so I decided to take him out (I hope that's not too inconvenient). As well as since this was platonic (given the reader is a child), I placed Ayato and Thoma in the same one (also hope you don't mind)

Characters" Diluc, Dainsleif, Thoma & Ayato, Zhongli, Tighnari

Summary: Fem! Child reader that is like Koala from One Piece (Reader is female and a child)

“Mr. Diluc!” Your bright smile caught the young man’s attention, as it usually would. He would return your smile with a faint one, so as to not offend your little heart. When he studied your body further, his smile faded. 

“(Y/n), where have all these scratches come from?” He knelt down to meet your level, inspecting some bloody scratches you had on your arm. 

Your smile never wavered, your eyes never became glossy, and he found that to be very odd. For someone normal your age, they would’ve been sobbing and complaining about how it hurts. You simply smiled, holding an empty bowl, “I was feeding some kitties. A dog came and scared them, so they scratched and bit me."He noticed the bowl trembling in your hands, it must have spooked you. 

Diluc picked you up, careful to not hurt any of your wounds, “Let’s get those patched up.” He grabbed the bowl he assumed you gave something to the cats with and placed it on his desk. He put you up on the counter and looked for his first aid kit, “Are you sure you’re ok, (Y/n)?” 

You nodded, and smiled. If Diluc didn't know any better, he would say you’re taking this better than he was, but he was perceptive and could tell your obvious discomfort.

As he pressed some disinfectant to the scratches you flinched, your eyes widening slightly at the abrupt pain but then you caught Diluc looking at you and smiled, “Can we play hide and go seek later?” 

“Once we have you all patched up, we can go play hide and seek.” He nodded and finished patching you up. 

You immediately jumped down running to the door and using it open, “You count first!” you ran out into the vineyard to your usual hiding spot, one Diluc pretended he didn’t already find as he slowly counted to 20. 

He knew of your past. All the hate, scorn and hardships you had endured despite your young age. Yet, you always seemed to remain happy and bright. But he knew your smile meant more than just that. He admired your bravery, and wanted to make you smile for real one day. 

Dainslef was walking down a dark cave, trying to track down a lead he had received about a defiled statue. He was on edge, every noise caused him to stop and study it. He heard some footsteps running towards him, and he turned around, about to draw his weapon when he saw your tiny face peak from behind a rock. 

He frowned. What was a child doing in here? He knelt down and beckoned you over, still ready to fight in case this was some sort of trap. You smiled and ran over. 

Dainslef didn’t like how this looked. Your clothes were ripped and dirty, along with your face that had dirt smudged all over. 

Your hair was sticking out in all places and your body was all battered and bruised, “What are you doing here, little one?” he smoothed your hair down with his hand as you shrugged with a smile, “I was taken and left here, I dunno why.” 

He was saddened by this, another abandoned soul in this cruel world. The archons didn’t care about these things, why would they? 

He eased a little and picked you up, “Where are your parents?”

“Dead.” you said, grabbing his shoulder for extra support.

He frowned and decided this was more important than his mission. 

As he took you out he noticed you kept smiling. Even after he had to fight some smiles, or when you tripped and fell, or when you didn’t have any food or drink for several hours before he found shelter, not once did you stop smiling or humming a happy tune. 

Dainslef knew this went deeper than just a plain smile. 

As he got to know you better during your travels (he wasn’t about to leave a poor defenseless kid alone), he started to find out the why’s of your smiling and positive attitude, and he found himself emphasizing with you a bit. You actually brought joy to his life, and he wished he had done the same. 

You flinched as a boy around your age threw a g

lass of hot tea at you, “You freak! Stop smiling! You're so creepy!” 

You continued to smile as you grabbed a napkin and cleaned yourself up, “That hurt a little, please don’t throw something that hot around, it’s dangerous.” 

Thoma had been cleaning the entrance when he heard the boy yell at you. He dropped his broom and ran towards the voices.

A few months ago, his master, Ayato, had found you wandering around Inazuma with no home or shelter. He decided he had plenty of space and allowed you to stay  with them. Ever since then, Thoma and Ayato had been working together to help raise you. Your smile always warmed their heart, and they tried their best to never upset you (although they’d find it hard to distinguish against. 

When Thoma arrived he saw Ayato was already making his way towards the commotion. 

Ayato tapped the kid’s shoulder as Thoma picked youtube inspecting the severity of your burns. 

“Little kid, I suggest you don’t mess with Miss (Y/n) again. She is a permanent guest of mine in this residence and you work under me. I’m aware your training is not over yet, so let me give you a small lesson, don’t be rude to guests.” The kid was trembling as the two men looked at him. 

“Are you ok (Y/n)?” Thoma asked, carrying you towards the kitchen to run the burn under cold water, 

“I’m ok!” You smiled and let him work on the burns. 

Ayato entered the room shortly after and checked teh wounds himself and apologized on his staff's behalf, “Their young age is no excuse for this.” 

You smiled and hugged them both, “I’m fine, really. Anyways I have to get back to training with Ayaka!” you hopped down and ran off. 

Ayato and Thoma looked at each other. It’s not that they agreed with the kid about your smile being creepy or unnerving, but it was certainly unusual. They didn’t press about your past and didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, but it seemed they’d have to sit you down for a talk soon to be able to help you. 

“Good work, (Y/n).” Zhongli praised your work. He was teaching you calligraphy and noted that Your brush strokes had improved greatly. Your smile widened and you continued to carefully copy the sentence that he had written down for you to practice. 

Zhongli still remembered the first day he found you. It had been a cloudy day as you stepped in, with a small pouch filled with some mora and a few fake wooden coins. You placed the money on the counter, “I need one funeral, please.” 

Zhongli found this quite distressing. Why was this young child smiling up at him asking for a funeral? Who had died? How had they died? 

He leaned over, “And who is this funeral for?” 

“A squirrel I made friends with got shot by a hunter.” You said, your smile never leaving. At first Zhongli found this to be quite disturbing. 

As he continued to study you, he noticed your clothes were worn out and tattered and you had small little scars decorating your skin. He frowned, “I see. Well we will give you a first customer discount, it’s on the house.” He slid the pouch of money back towards you and you picked it up again. 

“Really?” Your smile widened, “Yay!” 

During the small funeral ceremony Zhongli held with you, He noticed you never stopped smiling, not once. Even when the body was buried and you said goodbye. 

As time went on, Zhongli noticed it was a bad habit of yours to simply smile. Your ordinary smile soon became what anyone would consider a normal facial expression, but Zhongli knew it hid a world of pain. 

You had been in the forest rangers for a while (as an unofficial apprentice) and worked alongside Tighnari. Due to all the time you spent together, he considered you something akin to family. 

You worked alongside him and your smiles and overall joyful nature always reenergized him when he was feeling overwhelmed with work. 

“Here, try this.” Tignari held up a new juice concoction towards you. He had been learning how to make different flavors and try to find your favorite one as a sort of pass time.

You brought the vail to your lips and took a sip and then laughed, “It’s too bitter, ‘nari!” 

He frowned, “But i only used sweet ingredients.” he frowned and tried it himself and shuddered. It was very bitter. He thought it was due to the activating chemical he used to enhance the flavors. 

“You’re right it is very bitter.” He dumped the contents into a safe container to be disposed of properly later. You smiled and as you looked at him work, “You can go outside and play. I’m sure this must be quite boring.”

You shook your head, “I want to stay here.” you had found comfort in Tighnari, feeling safe with him around. Your smile was a little more genuine when around him. 

Tighnari finished his formula and began working, giving you orders on what he needed you to do as he went on to include you during the process. 

“Done. Try it now.” He handed you the vail after making sure it wasn’t poisonous. 

You took a sip and nodded, “Perfect!” 

He tried it himself and smiled, “I agree.” 

Tighnari had researched your past, and he had noted how your smile never wavered and how hard you worked. He had introduced you to Collie, knowing your pasts were just a bit similar, and made sure to always have your needs met. He was going to make sure you never had to go through something like that during your life again. He’d make sure to keep you smiling. 

#genshin impact #genshin x y/n #genshin x you #genshin x reader #genshin x female reader #genshin diluc ragnvindr #diluc ragnvindr #diluc x reader #genshin impact diluc #diluc genshin impact #diluc #diluc x you #diluc x y/n #genshin diluc #genshin thoma #thoma x reader #thoma x y/n #thoma genshin #ayato x y/n #ayato fluff #ayato x you #ayato x reader #ayato #ayato genshin impact #ayato kamisato #thoma #zhongli genshin impact #genshin zhongli #genshin impact zhongli #zhongli

[obsoleteozymandias]

Hello! I saw that matchups were open and thought I'd send in a request for Twisted Wonderland.

Appearance-wise I am a 165 cm tall, average build, Bangladeshi woman (She/her and they/them pronouns please). I have wavy black hair that just reaches below my shoulders and I usually dress in South Asian attire, usually salwar-kameez plus a hijab. I also wear glasses. I don't really feel comfortable going out without them 😅

My MBTI and enneagram: INTJ 5w4

Star sign: Sagittarius sun, Virgo moon and rising (I act more like a Virgo, allegedly)

Sexuality: demiromantic asexual (demisexual?)

Personality traits: Calm, collected, polite, quiet, shy (but that can easily be mistaken for being aloof or done with everyone's shit (they aren't entirely wrong about the latter) (someone told me I radiate black cat energy), not very facially expressive (I'm the most emotional emotionless person I know. I do feel things more deeply than people give me credit for), a good listener, hardworking (I often bite off more than I can chew and end up burnt out), intelligent (especially with numbers. RIP impostor syndrome + gifted kid burnout syndrome. As much as I love my major, electrical engineering is kicking my ass). I am also the oldest of three sisters, so I'm good at handling kids (I'm also expected to be the perfect daughter, so... yea). Someone also told me I'm wise, but all that wisdom came from all the books I read + watching Avatar: The Last Airbender lmao. The same person also said my presence was therapeutic (paraphrasing, of course. Also, this is alleged)

Hobbies: Making art, reading, writing, animating (I'm relatively new to animation. I don't know what I'm doing most of the time, but I'm still having fun), basically anything creative. I especially like to draw and paint things that radiate a sense of comfort, nostalgia, and serenity. Someone also told me that my artworks also hold a sort of innocence in the composition of the shapes, colours, and overall vibe of what I draw/paint. I also make jewelry from time to time

Likes: Classical music, lofi hip-hop, indie rpgs (Yume Nikki and Off have me in a chokehold, though not as tight as Obey Me, Court of Darkness, and Twisted Wonderland), tea, creative outlets. I also like to learn psychology

Dislikes: Cruelty, anyone who would dare to threaten my family or friends, loud noises, red meat (The texture is too much for me to handle), bright lights. I also dislike strong smelling things and being in crowded, noisy and bright environments for prolonged periods of time

What qualities do you look for in a partner? It may not look like it on the surface, but I'm a huge softie, I'd like anyone who I can feel safe talking to. They don't need to be perfect, I just need them to put effort into helping me with my emotional needs. I already do that a lot with others, so I'd like it if they turn the tables on me. I also would not tolerate it if my partner belittles me or if they're just mean or rude for no apparent reason.

My love languages include making art for them and spending quality time

How do you want to receive affection? As I stated before, I would like them to put effort into helping me with my emotional needs. I already do that a lot with others, so I'd like it if they turn the tables on me. I would also like physical touch and words of affirmation, but I can't guarantee I'll know how to react to that at first 🥲. It's gonna take some time for me to get used to it

OFF FANS RISE UP!!!!!!! BRING THE FANDOM BACK!!!

== Twisted Wonderland ==>

I match you up with…

Lilia Vanrouge 

Lilia is fascinated by you. You’re so young yet so wise! Your eyes and artistic works show so much wisdom and experience and he wishes to some extent that he could be like you. 

He wants your dedication and intelligence, too. He feels like he’s made some mistakes in his lifetime, and in the darker parts of his mind, he wonders if he doesn’t deserve you. 

You’re quick to remedy that with kisses and cuddles though. 

Side note: Lilia is a little spoon. I do not make the rules. 

He’ll get lost in your passion and artwork for HOURS. Seriously, he’ll just stare at your art and get this sense of comfort that he hasn’t felt before. And he’ll get that comfort all the same with you. You’re like home to him. 

He keeps a small painting of yours on his person at all times, maybe in a locket, which helps him calm down when his emotions get the better of him. 

He’ll also just look at it and giggle and kick his feet. He is whipped. 

Lilia is absolutely someone you can feel safe talking with. He may not always understand your emotions, and he can be a bit pigheaded when he thinks he’s right, but if anyone can talk some sense into him it’s you. 

He’ll be there for you at the end of each day and the beginning of each morning, and he’ll always remind you of how deep his love for you is. You are his everything. 

#twst #twisted wonderland #oz’s requests #matchup #twst matchup #lilia vanrouge #lilia vanrouge x reader

[therantsofawriterrr]

Ok, so I've spent the last three days and a whole sleepless night reading the Perfect Marriage Revenge webtoon and there were some changes in the show that I didn't like. This will have spoilers so read at your own risk.

Okay so first of all, the accident was totally different. In the show, Do Guk hits Yijoo's car, and then a truck hits both of the cars, now ik I'm going into logistics, but umm. The truck driver. Man didn't even stop for a SECOND. Like bro you hit two CARS, which prolly had a person or people in it and you just go on driving. In the webtoon, it's actually like a pedestrian accident? Idk how to call it but basically, Yijoo walked out on the road and the traffic lights were red or smn like that and Do Guk hit her with his car and he got hit by another car. Smn like that. This change doesn't really matter to me, only the truck thing irks me a bit.

Another change that I do not like at all was Manager Kim. So basically in the webtoon, it wasn't just Do Guk and Yijoo that died, it was also Manager Kim. All three of them had tattoos on their wrists. Basically, his story was that he used to be in the same orphanage as Yijoo and when she got adopted by her shitty "family", he saw that it was his dad's girlfriend because of whom he died. Also, he draws!!!!! He joined as the secretary of the grandfather and the stepmom found out that he was a spy and had an accident orchestrated, so his was the car that hit Do Guk's which caused them both to die. I hate that in the show, they show him literally KILLING Yijoo. Plus, they didn't even give a reason as to which he helps her in the show. In the comic, he's like I couldn't help you the first time, so imma do it now. Oo oo and and, after a lot of the plot happens, Yijoo tells him to lead his life and put himself first, to start drawing again and all. It was soooo nice. He held an exhibition to show his dad's paintings to everyone and went to France to study art. I was scared that he'll be killed off or there'll be like a stupid love triangle, but thankfully that didn't happen.

Another thing, Sehyeok actually kinda understands that Yura is an obsessed bitch and lets her go which kinda made me happy, BUT THEN, it turned out that he was more of an a-hole than ever because he slept with Yura when she was absolutely shitfaced and literally called him Do Guk. So umm yea. And also, they showed Yura struggling too. She had his kid, and idk one of the last scenes kinda gave me the vibes that she's probably understood the fact that this obsession with Yijoo was just gonna make her end up ruining her and the kid's life. I don't rly care that they changed that in the show, but reading the webcomic kinda made me hope that she was able to get out of her situation and go far away, so that she could restart her life and take care of the kid.

More of Do Guk and his brother's enmity was revealed. It was mostly just the brother kinda hating on Do Guk and trying to make his life hell all his childhood. Also Do Guk had a video game company. There were lots of changes that I didn't rly mind, but ig these were some of the ones that irked me the most.

Also, Do Guk and Yijoo had three kids. THREE. THEY HAD TWINS, AND THEN A DAUGHTER. AND A CAT. MAN. I WANNA SEE THAT VERSION NOW.

#perfect marriage revenge #kdrama #webtoon #webcomic

[supeson]

the night won't wait

part one

He finds himself on the roof. Leaning over the edge, contemplating how much dexterity it would take him to get across the street sans gadgets.

"Hey." He immediately starts trying to climb over the edge. His own arms wrap around him. "C'mon man, don't be like that. I just want to talk," Dick says, bringing his double back down.

"And I really think I would prefer hitchhiking back to the Tower than have this conversation," Red responds, leaning against back against the very brick he was about to vault over.

"I'm not mad, first of all." Dick clarifies. "And based on that display back there, I have a proposition for you."

Red's ear twitches. "Oh?"

Dick takes a deep breath. "We've been talking, and," He rubs the back of his neck. "God, there is no good way to ask this, but. Would you want to join us? One night before you leave?"

Red looks at him as if he's grown another head. Dick starts to backtrack, hands up in a placating gesture. "I mean, you don't have to. I certainly wouldn't like, pressure you or anything. We just thought- and with what we all witnessed downstairs- I didn't think-"

"They really thought you were the best one to proposition me, huh?" Red interrupts.

Dick laughs, but it sounds pained. "Remember that time Steph asked you if you would fuck your own clone? And you said yes? Kinda thought you would think of it like that. But with another person thrown in."

"And if I say yes?" Cautious as ever, in case the rug is pulled out from under him.

Dick grins. "One night is all you'll need. Promise."

*

It's been all set up. They send Red out on an errand while they prepare, and when he gets back, the apartment is dark. He sets the keys he's been given (your keys) on the table by the door. One of your cats runs up to him and rubs up against him, meowing. He leans down and gives her a quick pet, then quickly hangs his jacket up. He can instinctively tell what's going on, and a thrill runs up his spine as his mind goes into overdrive. Will it be good? Will he be good? What if-

He's drawn from his thoughts by a small moan coming from your room. Red hesitates for only a moment before heading past the kitchen, and down the hallway. The door at the end of it, just off to the right, is slightly ajar. A warm yellow light comes from it, taunting him. Beckoning him.

He stills just outside, hand on the doorknob, nervous. He feels like he's going to throw up from excitement. The thought of finally getting to touch you, taste you, sends him reeling like no other. He doesn't realize he's got a white-knuckled grip on the doorknob until it almost breaks. He lets go and accidentally pushes it inwards. He freezes.

The both of you look at him. You're on the bed in a red lingerie set, straps and all, with your hand between your legs. His double sits across from the bed in your armchair, in nothing but his boxers, hands clenched tightly together across his abdomen.

"Shit, sorry. We were supposed to wait for you, but Dick here can be very persuasive when he wants to be," You say, wrenching your hand out of the lace thong. Red says nothing, just stares at the scene before him. You open your mouth again to say something, but he darts forward, ripping his shirt off over his head with one hand, then dropping to his knees in front of you.

"May I? Please?"

You look to Dick, who nods eagerly. "Yea, go for it."

Red wastes no time tugging the thong down your legs, letting it dangle off one of them, before hiking your right leg over his shoulder, wrapping his arm around the left and pull it to the side. He spreads your pussy lips with both hands, committing the sight to memory. A small string if your slick webs between them from where you'd already been playing with yourself. Red dives in, licking up the strand for himself, moaning as he does so. After dreaming for years what you would taste like, the real thing is nothing in comparison. He rubs tight circles around your clit with one of his thumbs, using the other to hold you open. One of your hands goes to his head, trying to keep from pulling his hair by almost frenetically running your fingers through the front of it. He spits on your pussy, demanding roughly, "Pull it."

You let out a heavy breath. "Hah, didn't want to assume you'd be into exactly the same things." You do as he bids you and pull on his hair. The sound he makes is unearthly. He goes at it with a hunger you've never seen before, to the point that you yelp when he nips your clit. Red pulls back to assess. You look sufficiently wet enough, he decides. One finger goes in, and you instantly clench around him, the sight taking his breath away. The pace he sets is punishing, adding another finger as soon as he hears you squelch. You on the other hand, are losing your whole mind. Normally when Dick is this rough, it's too fast to notice, quickies after work or before patrol. But Red is taking his time and bringing power behind every thrust. Your hips are trying to pull away, the sensation of it all just on this side of too much, but Red's arms are locked onto you, pulling you closer every time your hips jerk away.

Your boyfriend, in this reality, sits in the chair, his fingers flexing closer to his boxers, eager to touch himself, but he knows he has to wait closer to the main event. The two of you have been looking forward to trying this for a long time; why ruin it by being impatient? His cock flexes at the thought.

The smoldering look Dick is giving you as he watches his double fingerfuck you is enough to drive you over the edge. Despite the grip Red has, your thighs clench together and you let out a breathless whine as you cum, back arching. Red doesn't let up, harshly sucking on your clit through it. You finally have to tap the bed twice to get his attention.

"C'mere, birdie. I need a sec."

Red snaps out of it long enough to finally get up off of his knees, towering over you in just his jeans, his dick about to burst through them. You crook a finger at him and he obediently leans over you, planting one knee on the bed. You pull him in for a kiss, and Red swears he sees fireworks. After years of pining, he finally knows what it's like to kiss you, to taste you. Your mouth tastes sweet, like the cantaloupe lip balm you prefer. Your tongue intertwines with him, and you grab his belt, pulling him closer to undo it. You toss it to the side, and start trying to pop open the button. Red stills your hands, puling away faster than you can blink to take off his pants and underwear in one fell swoop, kicking them towards the door with one foot as he mounts you again. He gives you two kisses before swiping his tongue across your lips again. You eagerly open your mouth for him and he groans. This is what he's been waiting years for.

When you run your hand across his cock, giving a tight squeeze right at the head, he nearly cums, arms buckling for just a second. You let out a light laugh. "I thought so. C'mon, get inside me already."

Red frowns, and quickly taps your thigh. "Condoms?"

Your residual smile turns sad. "I uh, can't have kids. Just a fun fact about me you should know, no big deal, really. You're clean though right? You've been tested lately?"

The little revelation rocks Red. You've always made jokes about never having kids, but he never knew they were true. "Uh, yea."

You turn around, pulling yourself up onto your elbows and knees, presenting yourself to him. "Great! Slide home then, big guy."

Red shakes his head, taking his cock in hand, and slides himself up and down your slit, hitting your clit with every push. You arch your back like a cat, letting out a little huff. He looks back to the chair, where his double sits, and Dick nods, his boxers now completely off, cock standing at attention.

Red pushes in and he immediately has to grip your hips, pulling out a bit to make sure he doesn't cum from overstimulation. You're warm and tight, everything and nothing like he's imagined. He hears the sounds of your joining, your wetness completely covering his cock and pubic hair every time he thrusts a little bit more. It takes a second on his part to finally get it in all the way, becoming overwhelmed by his own feelings combined with the sensations of finally having your pussy all to himself.

He's lost in his own thoughts when you impatiently push back against him, giving him a knowing look. You have the audacity to wink at him. It sets him off, pulling out and slamming back into your pussy so quickly it throws you off, sliding off of your elbows and going sprawlig. The only thing keeping the two of you joined is Red, his hands so tightly clamped to your hips you know you'll have bruises tomorrow. The pace he sets is brutal, barely giving you time to adjust to the feeling of having him inside of you before he's gone, and then right back where he started, all in a matter of seconds. You let out curse after curse, knowing that your boyfriend is watching all of this only adding another layer. "Touch yourself," Red demands, eyes focused on all of you all at once, refusing to blink lest he miss a moment.

The minute your fingers his your clit, you're gone. When you cum, he stays inside of you, making minute, small thrusts. It's on the third clench that Red cums himself, letting out the filthiest moan you've ever heard. You feel him fill you up more than Dick usually does. But, to be fair, Dick fucks you regularly.

Red pulls his cock out of you, and immediately drops to the floor again, spreading your lips apart to watch his cum drip from you. You whine, wanting nothing more than to finally drop your stance and roll over, but you stay up for him. You know this means a lot to him.

Finally Red gets back up and joins you on the bed, pulling you into his side as he lays back, panting into the crown of your head. The two of you lay like that for a while, Dick just sitting in the armchair, having finally gone to palming his cock slowly. Watching you get pounded by his double was a heady experience, but he's ready to get to the main even.

"You ready for round two, baby?" Dick pipes up.

You take in a deep breath. "As ready as I'll ever be, Dickie." You roll on top of Red and start grinding against him slowly. You're suprised to find him still hard. "Jesus. Pent up, much?"

Red scoffs, hands coming to drag you faster. "You have no idea."

You lift yourself up on your knees and take his cock in your hand. It's a little sticky from your combined releases, but you don't mind. You know it's going to get worse before it gets better. You sink down slowly, letting out a long exhale as you meet his base. He's just as long as your boyfriend, just barely kissing the tip of your cervix at this angle. You slide up and down a couple of times, letting out small noises from the back of your throat.

Red is in awe, staring up at you. The girl of his dreams, riding his dick. It's an incredibly heady experience, but to be fair, it all has. His hands go over yours where they rest on his chest, squeezing. He's so caught up in it, he doesn't notice his own double coming up behind you until DIck is placing sweet kisses to your shoulder. "Are you ready? Are you sure?"

You nod, eyes shut tightly. "Yep, go ahead babe."

Red is confused and opens his mouth to voice his concern when he feels it. Another cock lightly prodding at your entrance. His double's cock prodding at your cunt. Red lets out another groan, head slamming back into the mattress. He never expected you to be into double penetration. It opens a whole slew of dirty scenarios for him to jerk off to, this memory being chief among them. Dick slowly works his way into you as you continue to ride Red. He takes it slow, just like the two of you practiced, one hand practically glued to your clit, tracing tight circles. You breathe heavily through your nose, one hand coming to grip Dick's arm where it runs down your body to your cunt, the other turns into a fist on Red's chest. The scratch marks stand out beautifully against his tanned skin.

When Dick's finally in, Red's vision explodes with sensation. The way you clench around the two of them drives him crazy; he wants nothing more than to start slamming into you again. You're too tight, and he needs to explore. You on the other hand smile tightly. "How do I look?" You ask breathlessly.

"Gorgeous." The two men say in unison. The dam breaks at that, your hand on Dick's arm digging in tightly as you cum. Dick instantly stops rubbing your clit, letting you ride out the orgasm with no added stimulation. You bite back a scream, the feeling of cumming while so stretched out has you reeling.

When you finally come back down to earth, Dick kisses your neck tenderly. "Can we move, baby?"

"Please," You plead. There are tears in your eyes, and Red marvels at how pretty you look as they fall, splattering against his abdomen.

The two men move slowly, taking care to monitor your every microexpression. Any time you show any inkling of discomfort, they slow down and switch it up, giving you ample time to adjust. Finally, after what seems like an eternity, you tell them to move. The two of them smile devilishly to one another and start strong, steady thrusts. You start to gneuinely cry and whine, trying to keep yourself together even though you're being split apart at your core. Red thinks this is the most beautiful you've ever looked. He nearly cums at the sight of two cocks thrusting into you.

They pick up the pace, losing the rhythm they had started with. You never get the chance to be empty as they both piston into you. You're genuinely surprised when you cum again, letting out a a loud, clear, "FUCK!"

It throws the men off too, as Red cums with a yelp, and Dick isn't too far behind, their seed filling you up prompting a few more tired aftershocks.

Dick is the first one to slip out of you, gently puling out and starting to set you on your side. Red snaps out of his haze and helps, settling in beside you, your combined body heat finally becoming susceptible to the cool air of the room. His mind is fuzzy and full, and he can barely keep his hands off of you; one hand caressing your thigh, the other wiping at your sweaty forehead. It isn't until his double comes back in the room to get you that he realizes he's being too touchy.

Dick gently peels you up off of the mattress. "C'mon babe, into the bathroom. Don't want you getting any infection."

You whine, but get up with a yawn, trudging across the hall into the bathroom. The door clicks shut when they finally speak to each other.

"Thank you." Red hesitates. "For tonight, if it wasn't obvious."

Dick waves him away, an easy smile on his face. "It's no problem man. I've been where you are. Besides, you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours."

Before anything else can be said, you come back out of the bathroom, and lay down against Red again, pulling Dick down with you. Sandwiched between the two men you pull up your comforter, pulling the blankets into yourself and promptly start drifting off.

"Oh yea, hot tip: they're a blanket hoarder, so maybe upgrade from the just the one quilt and comforter combo," Dick says, folding his arms behind his head.

*

They've finally found a way to send them all home. They're to gather at the Tower so that they can go to the Watchtower, and from there it'll be homeward bound. Dick and Red go to leave his apartment at the ass crack of dawn, and Red thinks he's content not to say goodbye until you come stumbling out of the bedroom.

"I fuckin' tol' you to wake me up!" You slur, hitting Dick in the chest. He just sighs and hangs his head. You turn to Red, taking his head in your hands. "Look. Look! I dunno what I'm like in that other universe, but I know one thing: Dick Grayson is the best thing to ever happen to me. So you gotta go get me, alright? You gotta go get me, okay? Promise me."

Red looks back at you, eyes shimmering. "I will. I promise."

You lightly smack his cheeks. "Great! And maybe pick up from unfrosted strawberry pop-tarts to sweeten the deal. You know I'm always down for those."

With that, you lean in and kiss him, leaving him one last lingering taste of yourself before he has to wait who knows how long again.

Red swears to himself it won't be long.

#dick grayson/reader #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson #nightwing x reader #nightwing/reader #nightwing

[existencebringsonlypain]

1-70 skip all needed if they make you uncomfy

*deep inhale*

LONG POST INCOMING!

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

yeah! they're lovely people

02: Who did you last say I love you" to?

probably my mom

03: Do you regret anything?

I regret many things. can I think of any right now? no

04: Are you insecure?

not really, generally

05: What is your relationship status?

single, but also a minor and aroace so it's not sad or anything

06: How do you want to die?

preferably suddenly without prior notice. that way I couldn't have regrets

07: What did you last eat?

a werthers caramel

08: Played any sports?

nope

09: Do you bite your nails?

not bite with my teeth, but I pick at them often

10: When was your last physical fight?

.....I cannot remember if I ever have fought anyone physically. don't think I have

11: Do you like someone?

I like a lot of people. romantically? no

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

yea. completely accidentally at first, but at one point i thought "ha, I've come this far, I'm just gonna hold out" and then I did

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

hate is a strong word. that said, I suppose I might hate jack, cody, juan, and phoenix from school

14: Do you miss someone?

uhhhhh not really

15: Have any pets?

four cats and two dogs. three out of four cats are rescues

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

throat hurts but overall feel the same as ever. which is to say, not much.

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

no. do people do that???

18: Are you scared of spiders?

not really, unless they're actively on me. theyre fuzzy and adorable

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

....no. I don't want to forget to do something and regret it for the rest of eternity

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

im aroace

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

take care of neighbors cat and otherwise sleep

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

no. might at some point tho, but adopted, and only if they're older. only one.

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

ears pierced, nothing else. only one

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

art, english, math

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

no. mostly because I've forgotten them. cue existential fear of forgetting childhood friends etc etc

26: What are you craving right now?

anything cold

27: Have you ever broken someone's heart?

not to my knowledge

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

never dated

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

nope

30: What's irritating you right now?

physical symptoms. am sick

31: Does somebody love you?

romantically? not to my knowledge. platonically? hopefully lol

32: What is your favourite color?

lavender. it took maybe four fifths of my life to figure that one out

33: Do you have trust issues?

if trusting too much counts, yeah

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

don't remember

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

probably random school people. I have issues with breaking down at school. usually can suppress it tho

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

no, don't think so. if you break my trust I won't give it back easily

37: ls it easier to forgive or forget?

forget. don't mind how it's pretty much never optional for me

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

nOPE

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

older than I am now

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

outside of my house? absolutely not

51: Favourite food?

actually do not know. crunchwraps from taco bell are very good. chow mein from panda express is VERY good. canned corned beef hash is great. that indian dish with the flatbread you dip in the spinach is v good.

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

nope lol. some shit just happens

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

uhhhhh don't remember. probably listened to a YouTube video

54: Is cheating ever okay?

look man i'm aroace and barely even understand what attraction is. i'm not the guy to ask about this

55: Are you mean?

not intentionally

56: How many people have you fist fought?

a whopping 0, here's hoping it stays that way

57: Do you believe in true love?

nah. it's all a spectrum. how long love lasts may be longer than your lifetime, but I don't think it's infinite. then again never been in love so

58: Favourite weather?

thunderstorm. the dark kind

59: Do you like the snow?

literally never seen it irl

60: Do you wanna get married?

nope. unless it's for tax benefits

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

no that is so gross imo. you are calling me an infant. but again aroace

62: What makes you happy?

no clue, it varies and isn't guaranteed

63: Would you change your name?

eh. maybe. it'd take some time to get used to, maybe wouldn't want to put in the effort

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

I'd kiss fluffy the cat as many times as it took for her to understand its an affection thing

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

panic

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

yea. Ben D. he's great

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

my brother probably

68: Who's the last person you had a deep conversation with?

depends what you call deep. if this counts than whoever's reading this

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

isn't this a repeat? either way no, not exclusive to individual people anyway

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

prolly most of my friends and my parents

#theeeeeere we go. every single question #didnt take as long as expected #also didn't go as deep as expected. tho prob would be different if i was literally ever in love or even capable of that #existenceunrelateds #ask #asks #ask game

[seelestia]

YEEE NPNP!! college was nervewracking ngl (still is), at least when i started last year august iirc? but yeah! do you know what major you want? alas i cannot chill as much as i used to smh

heheh fr tho >:3 i think the fontaine arc was really well written and went into more depth (get it? depth? waters? ok i'll stop now) and because of how much lore we were given since it seems to be more complex ngl. as for myself, i'm sticking albedo and lyney under the microscope so i can understand them both better

especially albedo. i'd very much like to pick his brain the same way i wanna pick my boyfriend's- coughs

HEJSJD THE WAY I STARTED SMILING AFTER READING THE HCS,,needed that ngl cuz i've been stressed a lot. but i think bedo would be the kind of person who'd do that and create an artificial flower and then name it after me hehehe

but hey, who's to say wanderer wouldn't leave you a flower someplace where you can find it? just a small and sweet gesture and will very most likely deny it (and fails) when you tease him for it mwehehhe i can be devious too ya know or maybe even ayato leaves you a little present like a bracelet or hair accessory after a long day of work

AND NOO ITS OK I LOVE LISTENING TO UR RAMBLES TOO /gen /pos

actually yea i do have some new vibedo trivia! we've officially become engaged and he was the one who proposed first <3 that and he has a tendency to call me "sweet violet" since its an actual flower as well hehe. and tysm!! i'm honestly just doing my best to stay happy since my irl bedo is like very complementary to my personality if that makes sense? like he tends to wear darker clothing, i tend to wear a lot of pastels kinda thing. and so far, we're doing rlly good! sure there are some challenges we're dealing with now but im doing my best to stay positive ^^

also me being 20 ew. somehow i'm still being referred as old sheesh

ok im done rambling now im passing the mic to u hehe /lh

ah, truly. the price of education = freedom to chill !!! 😔 but alas, life is a ongoing journey with hurdles (and i happen to not be an athlete /j). currently, i have my eyes on a social science major atm! so i can hopefully pursue psychology :3 but my second choice is english bcs i cannot stray from the path of linguistics and literature no matter how much i tried /pos. ALSOSOSO if you don't mind, can you tell me more abt what you do in your course? i did my research on google but i think it cannot compare to someone with the actual experience™ ++ i'm just a curious cat and want to enable your rambles hehe <3 /lh

THE PUN, HELP. i agree, the fontaine quest deffo made some waves when it ended. OH I SEE!!! at first glance, i thought i could find a similarity between albedo and lyney (finding vi's type: a reality show jkjk we all already know it's albedo /hj) but the longer i looked, the more i questioned myself 😭 i do think that both of them are deeper than what people credit them for tho! albedo with his knowledge of khemia.... and lyney with his burdens as the next 'father'..... ooOOooO. some emphasis for now on lyney bcs of the 4.6 trailer that just dropped! DID YOU SEE IT YET VI 👁️ (but dw, i understand if you had no time / busy with college!) { the comment abt picking your bf's brain LMAO would he let you?? oh, truly, love is blind 🤭 /lh }

always happy to provide you with hcs!!! my brain buzzes with possibilities all the time && one of the things i love most abt selfships is analyzing how different personalities come together to form habits / idiosyncrasies / love languages of their own. like how albedo conjures up an artificial flower bcs he is simply reminded of his sweet violet — that is special and unique to you in a way. it's vv beautiful, i think!!

AND HSHDHWHSH. THE HCS??? vi, i cannot convey how much i appreciate you. i haven't indulged in my selfships for some time since i didn't have time to be active - so this made me SOSOSO happy aaaaaa!!! but wanderer definitely has left some flowers for me before bcs who else? i suggested the possibility of another suitor and he knocked me on the head (softly) YOWCHHH but hey, at least he admitted it was him! :3c and 'yato.... aghhhhh this man. he leaves a hairpin out in the open but tells me “not to touch it until he gets home” just so he can put it on me himself. he derives joy from seeing me hold back from snatching that thing up myself. meanie /j

AWWW THAT'S SO CUTE!! you two are the apt presentation of “opposites attract”. and i'm glad! i only have average experience with relationships but i think everyone agrees that a relationship isn't sunshine and rainbows all the time. that's as natural as our having good days and bad days in a week. i think what matters is how you both deal with them - and i believe in you & your bf! you're a good egg and ik your bf is too, so do what you both know is best <3 (forgive me if i sound like a grandma here /j BUT hooray to vi and irl albedo! my new fav couple yesyesyes)

#not sure why people think 20 is old... that's like the prime of your life!! #who cares abt them!!! live your life like you're forever young i say 🫂🫂 #ask box! 📬 #visitor: dearest vi! 🍡 #selfships! 🧸 #<- a new tag bcs selfships deserve a tag of its own <33

[lucidreamsxx]

Obey Me! Bros and Dateables at a karaoke! HCS.

Diavolo had invited MC to the castle for tea and had started inquiring MC on human world customs and traditions (what they do for fun) and our brilliantly smart MC much to the dismay of Lucifer and Barbatos blurted out the word 'KARAOKE' which obviously set our dear red-headed himbo on the idea that they must have a karaoke night and thus inviting everyone in HoL and the residents of Purgatory Hall. *sighhh* let's see how this goes~

LUCIFER: Flat out refuses to touch the mic, only giving in when Dia orders him to let loose abit and sing, and oh boi when he does.... Would, and i mean WOULD, sing Fly Me to the Moon. I mean, that's prolly the only song this poor old dilf daddy knows since all he listens to are cursed records but, look closely in his room and you might notice a record or two by Mr.Sinatra~

Lucifer's voice is like honey dripping off a golden spoon, like a light rain in the mornin, like the sultry voice of someone who just woke up, and all more mused beautifully. I mean, they don't call him Morningstar for nothing ;)

MAMMON: Think Jason Derulo, and Bruno Mars . He'd sing songs that are very beachy and summerry and fun and let's not forget the ones with names like '24K Gold' or 'Finesse' or that one verse in 'Acapulco' that goes,

"Damn that body, dabbled in versace, did i win the lottery or am i gonna stay? Damn you got me, like bitcoin and like dolce, i'm rich with you beside me, cause you're not coin based~"

100% singing directed right at MC because hey, he's MC's first man, so he gets to sing to MC's face :) In all honesty tho, his voice is absolutely beautiful, falling second only to Lucifer.

LEVIATHAN: He's belting out songs like Hikaru Nara and Unravel, and the only other person who enjoys them other than himself is MC sorry dude

He has a good voice, but sorta ended up ruining it from all that screaming and shouting at games lmfaoo.

Not that everyone minds, it's just that if he gets ahold of the mic he will NOT let go, the sort of person who says "one more song please, just one more" and that goes on forever.

SATAN: Will pick up the mic and sing any songs Lucifer sings just to prove that he's better. If he were to choose one for himself he'd pick classic Disney songs.

Think of Satan singing 'Once Upon A Dream' in that deep sexy voice of his.

If not Disney then he'd purposely pick something like "Queen of the Night Aria" and sing it mesmerizingly....in Lucifer's face :)

There's a reason cat boi excells at seductive speechcraft, too bad it doesn't work on Lucy tho heheh~

ASMODEUS: Ariana Grande, Lizzo, Doja Cat NEED I SAY ANYTHING ELSE?!

HE'S BOSSIN, HE'S BUSSIN, HE'S POPPIN THAT ASS ON THE KARAOKE TABLE- ok aaanndd he just got pulled away by Mammon and Lucifer...

Anywayyy... Asmo is literally THE BEST PERSON to have with you at a karaoke, literally knows all the songs and genre's and everything. You wanna sing 'Traitor'? he's gotcha! Wanna try your hand at 'Woman'? He's cheering you all the wayyyyy~♡♡♡

BEELZEBUB: baby only there for da food 0w0

Tho he would try singing if the songs are about food loll,

The type to just sit and cheer quietly while munching on snacks the sweet little babyyyyy

BELPHEGOR: Literally like Beel, but is just there to sleep. How he does it? Oh, no one knows~

If he had to sing however he'd partner up with Barbs and go hard on some rock songs, preferably the screamer since that gives him an excuse to yell at Lucifer MUAHAHAHAHASCDGHFK

Yep, defo getting strung up by the toes once he gets back sksksksksk

DIAVOLO: Ah yes, the dear Demon Lord a.k.a. the redheaded himbo of DevilDom. Think songs like "Put Your Head on my Shoulder" or "Uptown Funk" yea, that's the kind of songs he sings.

Totally gives off the dad vibe. Misses quite a number of notes but he seems so happy doing it that no one wants to rain on his parade.

BARBATOS: Rock. Just pure Rock. Preferably HARD METAL but that would be unfitting of a Demon Lord's butler, hmmm, maybe he'd do that in private.

Chooses songs like "Highway to Hell" " Welcome to the Jungle" and "Zitti E Buoni" and goes harddd on it

Partners up with Belphie alot since both of them have similar tastes in music.

Would look totally sexy singing to rock, bonus points if whips out a band shirt to wear and starts head banging.

The others are totally cheerin him on, especially Dia yeeeeeeee~

SIMEON: Hyms and church choir songs, literally not even halfway through one but everyone's begging him to stop, not cause they're devotional songs but cause...

Poor daddy angel's completely tone deaf ×~×

He has no idea that he is that bad and everyone refuses to tell him either, playing it off as the hyms giving them burning sensations. (It did not)

Daddy angel is completely oblivious and just happy to be there UwU

SOLOMON: SINGS SONGS LIKE "I WANT IT THAT WAY" AND "BAD ROMANCE"

Also repetitively sings "Livin' La Vida Loca" cuz he absolutely loves the beat and no one stops him cuz its iconic,

Belts them out like there's no bloody tomorrow, congrats, wizard bastard man has succeeded in giving everyone a headache.

The thing is MC joins him along with Levi, these three know all the meme songs, ALL OF IT.

Solomon: uPsIde iNsIdE oUttT

MC: ShE's LiVin lA vIdA lOcAAaAa~

Levi: sHe'Ll pUsH aNd PulL yOu dOwN

Solomon, MC, and Levi: SHE'S LIVIN LA VIDA LOCAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

They're like belting meme songs the Crayon Song and the chicken song at full volume at the top of their lungs and only stopped when the demon who's in charge of the karaoke came to inquire about the noise pollution.

LUKE: what makes you think Simeon let him come lmaooo.

Baby was put to bed and made sure to be asleep (Solomon cast a lil spell) before the other two snuck out of Purgatory Hall.

#funny #obey me chaotic mc #obey me mc crack #anime #fanfic #fiction #writers on tumblr #writing #obey me blog #obey me mc #obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me satan #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me luke #obey me crack #obey me facts #obey me funny #obey me headcanons #obey me hc #obey me house of lamentation