#your own experience on here. however you kinda just sound like a dick lol

[fiveminuterice]

controversial take i think but i don’t like when artists say “don’t like without reblogging” on their posts or say they’ll block people who like their art without reblogging. i say this as an artist, if you feel upset often enough by people who like without reblogging then that’s not on them that’s on you. and i say this is gently as possible. you are not owed engagement.

#this is not targeted at a specific person or post btw this is just something i’ve been seeing a lot recently #also does not account for people who like and put posts on queues #i’ve had mutuals like one of my posts and it was on queue for like two months #obviously for people who say ‘if you only like and not reblog i’ll block you’ that’s fine because you are more than welcome to curate #your own experience on here. however you kinda just sound like a dick lol #a lot of my art doesn’t get that much engagement but like. i’m not gonna tell 2/3s of the people who see my art and like it to #fuck off and reblog or else or whatever #it’d make my post a place of assumed hostility instead of something i just want to show people who may or may not enjoy it #[insert paragraph about how people still will feel bad about spending hours on something only for it to get 1:4 likes to reblog ratio] #i see this and i feel you but you start sounding like a youtuber lmao yknow? #it makes me think you view your art more like content than art

[opheliawillowbrook]

How the Cookie Crumbles

To say his brothers fought would be an understatement: They warred. That. That was the better word. However, it was Dick who was the peacemaker among them. The mediator extraordinaire, translating all his brothers’ woes and misunderstandings into less doom-pending transgressions. But to say this unofficial, yet very necessary part he played was tasking was yet another understatement of unspeakable proportions. It was a FUCKING LOT.

“I swear to God, Drake. You and Brown are a special kind of stupid.”

“Shut up, Damian! It’s a good idea!” Tim grumbled in reply.

“Yeah! You’re just mad you didn’t think of it first!”

Dick’s face fell upon hearing the argument and considered turning the other way, but he’d learned the hard way that his lack of interference could result in bloodshed. Damian did have a history of stabbing Tim, and Robin had an impressive body count, according to Jason. I’d better  make sure he doesn’t add two more.

“Well, fuck me and my  entire life,” Dick droned in frustration. “What are you three bitching about now?”

“Damian keeps saying our idea is stupid,” Stephanie tattled.

“Yeah!” Tim added with crossed arms. “He says we lack the fortitude for good ideas!”

“You do!” the current robin exclaimed.

“Damian?”

The youngest batboy rolled his eyes and reasoned, “Listen, I know these two brain donors barely have two brain cells to rub between them—”

“That’s not the only thing they rub!” Jason called from the other room.

Damian again rolled his eyes in contempt and continued, “And I’ve accepted, as a member of this family, that everyone gets to act a little stupid from time to time. However, as much as I would like to respect their commitment to their shared stupidity, I feel as if they are abusing the privilege and it needs to stop before one of them gets hurt.”

“Wow, he actually cares,” Jason added from still in another room.

“Have you been sitting there listening the whole time?” Dick asked, near facepalm.

“Affirmative,” Jason confirmed, entering from the hall.

“And you did nothing to stop them fighting?”

“It’s funnier this way.”

“Do I always have to be the responsible one?”

“Affirmative,” all four said with little thought.

“Okay then,” Dick sighed with reluctance. “Damian, I know you find it hard to accept the choices of others, but you need to understand that free choice and expression is about accepting that others may not make the same choices as you, and that’s okay. It’s the same as you choosing not to take my dating advice and ask Raven out because you’re afraid of rejection—”

“Shut up, Grayson! This isn’t about me!!!” Damian spat.

“Damian has the hots for Raven?” Jason teased. “You have good taste, Mighty Mouse. She got a great—”

“Don’t even finish that sentence, Todd!” Dick and Damian ordered in unison.

“I was gonna say personality,” Jason droned. “Get your minds out of the gutter. I mean for fuck’ sake.”

“Sure you were,” Tim replied with a glower.

“Yeah Tim, cause you never stare at her tits while you talk to her,” Jason added, throwing him doubly under the bus.

“Dude, are you trying to get me killed?” Tim said, shooting an elbow into his brother’s ribs as Damian and Stephanie both glared. Spurring Dick into a further mood for murder.

“My point being is, just because you don’t like other peoples’ ideas, doesn’t mean they’re stupid.”

“Tell them the idea, guys!” Jason urged, stirring the pot.

Stephanie and Tim looked at each other and nodded, as though they’d discovered the holy grail itself. “We’re gonna write a series of YA novels and sell them on the web!” Steph sang optimistically.

“Yeah, it’s a huge and diverse market,” Tim added.

“And with established characters, we’ll make a killing.”

Dick’s brow furrowed. “That sounds like fanfiction?”

“It sounds like utter bullshit,” Damian sneered, not single fuck given.

“It’s not bullshit,” Tim snapped. “YA novels make up a huge portion of the market. People love those things.”

“Then name one YA novel that has sold more than a manga in the last 10 years?”

Tim shrugged. “I can’t think of one at the top of my head, but there they definitely exist and sell.”

“Yeah, so does my fanfiction based on this family,” Jason added under his breath.

“What?” Everyone asked.

“Nothing. Continue.”

“So anyway, I told Damian it’s a foolproof plan.”

Dick rolled his eyes with a bit of doubt, but who was he to judge or discourage their creativity. I mean, he dropped out of college after all? “I’m not saying I believe it’s bulletproof, because frankly, nothing is. But I’m curious why you would consider telling Damian? I mean, he hates most things.”

“And Drake. I hate Drake.”

“We’re all very aware, Dami,” Dick drawled in annoyance. “But yeah, why would you tell him anything important to you? Especially that?”

“Well, we kinda needed a loan. I knew Bruce would undoubtedly say no and, well, Damian has money.”

“Because I make good business decisions.”

“I don’t know why I thought of asking you?”

“You didn’t, Jason told you to,” Stephanie confessed, recalling an earlier conversation.

“Jason, really?” Dick tsked.

“Hey, Damian does make good business decisions. Who do you think cleans and invests money? It’s certainly not Alfred.”

“Because Alfred would have nothing to do with your blood money, Jason. And Damian, I’m very disappointed in you!”

“Grayson, I don’t know what high horse you are riding on today, but you better come off it. Father told me if I wanted money, that I needed to earn it and that I should get a job. So I got one.”

“Laundering money for Red Hood’s criminal Enterprise is not a job!”

“Actually it is. Mighty Mouse made us an LLC and everything. I own several Wash & Folds, all legitimate! Thanks to Hell Spawn here! I’m actually considering making him a partner.”

“So will your LLC fund our YA Novels?”

“Oh fuck no!”

“Come on, Jay! We have a solid business plan,” Stephanie pleased.

“You’re business plan is a bunch of meaningless numbers written on the back of a napkin and poorly illustrated versions of us,” Damian said, holding up the napkin in question.

“Okay, so it’s not the final draft, but we’re working on it!” Tim said pointedly.

“Yeah, as tempting as this all sounds, I didn’t make my money making half baked business decisions,” Jason reasoned

“No, you made it by taking over Gotham’s drug trade,” Dick clarified with disapproval.

“Which was a solid business decision.”

“Why do I even talk to you?”

“I don’t know why I talk to any of you,” Damian scowled, arms crossed, grateful there was no shared genetics between him and his adoptive kin. “I don’t understand what father saw in any of you.

“I can’t answer that,” Jason replied. “However, I can tell you, from personal experience, what he saw in your mom.”

“Do you wanna die, Todd?”

“Do you wanna not have a job?” Jason wanted. “Also, been there done that. But hey, if I died twice then I’d have buffy status so don’t threaten me with a good time, kid.”

“On that note, I’m leaving,” Damian grimaced. “I have to meet Raven, anyway.”

“Oh,” Dick sang. “You have a date!”

“It’s not a date.”

“Bet you wish it was a date,” Stephanie teased. “Y’know, if you just stopped acting like a dick all the time, I bet she’d go out with you.”

“Shut up, Brown.”

“Oh no,” Dick smiled. “I know it’s hard to believe, but he’s nice to Raven.”

“Hey keep that shit up,” Jason added. “If you’re nice to her, she’d be nice to you!”

“I hate all of you,” Damian proclaimed and stormed away.

“Fuck you too! See you at work Monday! Jason called, earning a tiger middle finger.

“He might be an asshole, but he’s a good kid,” Jason nodded with a sense of pride, causing to Dick to silently scoff. “Still needs to get laid though.”

“Bruce is gonna be so pissed when he finds out you pulled Dami into your bullshit.”

“You’re using Raven’s pet name for him now?” Jason mocked. “And fucker’s gonna have to prove it first; there’s a reason I hired ‘Dami’ for that job.”

“Dude, fuck you; dig your grave,” Dick lamented. “And don’t come at me with one of your tired ass death jokes, they’re getting old.”

“Suit yourself,” the Outlaw glowered as silence set in.

“So Dick,” Tim dared sheepishly. “You, um, wanna invest in--”

“Absolutely not,” the elder hero replied.

Leaving Jason to chuckle. “And that’s the way the cookie crumbled.”

If you enjoyed that feel free to leave me kudos 👉 here on Ao3 lol. If you have any remdom prompts send them my way; maybe I’ll feel inspired 😘

#Damian Wayne #dick grayson #Jason Todd #Tim Drake #stephanie brown #batfamily #BatFam #batman #damian and raven #Damian al Ghul #damirae #red hood #nightwing #red robin #robin #Teen Titans #teen titans comics #wayne family adventures #teen titans vs justice league #dcamu #batman comics #DC comics #dc comics fandom #batman fanfiction #the robins #demon birds #demonbirds #spoiler #i am not starfire #dc comics ya novels

[leviskitten]

𝑵𝑺𝑭𝑾 𝒂𝒍𝒑𝒉𝒂𝒃𝒆𝒕 ♡

Sugawara Koushi x reader(gn!)

Warnings: regular nsfw stuff, nothing dark tho

A/n: I love alphabets can’t you tell? Lmao. If there are any characters you want me to do alphabets for then lmk.

Original template Fluff version

♡彡 A = Aftercare : What are they like after sex?

• It depends really. I headcannon kou as a bottom leaning switch (ofc), so it depends on which role he took for the session.

If he was a sub, then he’d be very tired probably, and clingy. Would definitely whine when you leave to grab a wet cloth to clean him up, and would whine again when you get up to at least put a T-shirt on lmao. But besides that he’s very cuddly. Pet his head while he rests his head on your neck while calling him a good boy and not only he’d be a blushing mess but he’d also fall asleep with a little smile on his face 🥺

If he was a dom, then he’d probably treat you the same way he wants to be treated when he subs. Cleans you up as fast as he can so he can get in bed with you a cuddle a whole bunch 🥺🥺

♡彡 B = Body part : What’s their favorite body part of theirs? And yours?

• His favorite body part about himself is probably his chest. He likes how slim and soft it is, (and how it looks when you mark him up).

And yours, it’s probably your legs. He loves how they look when you wrap them around his waist while he fucks you, and how they almost suffocate him when you sit on his face. He could admire them for hours honestly.

♡彡 C = Cum : Anything to do with cum, basically

• He has an odd fixiation with his cum. There, I said it.

He likes cum play, wheter that is paiting any part of you with it, stuffing it deep inside you and watch it slip out, or when you overstimulate him and let it all pool on his stomach.

It turns him on tbh.

♡彡 D = Dirty secret : A dirty secret of theirs.

• He wants to have a foursome with the other third years. But not in the way you’d expect.

He wants to either let them all have their way with you and practically use you. Or he wants you to be controlling them and make them act like your little pets. No in between.

There’s just something about you being in charge of two large man and himself that just turns him on to no end.

♡彡 E = Experience : How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?

• I feel like maybe he’s had had a little bit of prior experience, but not really.

He technically knows what to do, and how to do it, but he’s never done it before. So it’ll be a little awkward at first, but he’s got the basics and he learns quick so it’s good don’t worry.

♡彡 F = Favorite position : self explanatory lol

• When he subs, doggy style. He likes to be spanked and to leave the sheets wet with his cum afterwards.

When he doms, mating press. He likes to able to see your expression as he fucks you senseless, and it also makes him able to really get in there y’know.

♡彡 G = Goofy : Are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous?

• He can be both really tbh. He’ll try to take it serious most of the time, but if something funny happens he’d definitely point it out and laugh at it. It’ll probably turn into a in joke between you two afterwards.

♡彡 H = Hair : How well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes?

• He’s pretty well groomed honestly. He likes the twink vibe, so he’d probably shave over there most of the time. However the carpet does match the drapes 100%, tho it’s a little bit more blondish in there for some reason.

♡彡 I = Intimacy : How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect.

• Oh he’s a hopeless romantic, so if he’s in charge he’d 100% have his little cheesy moments without a doubt (will hold your hand while you cum).

♡彡 J = Jack off : Masturbation headcannon.

• The only way he can get off without you, is with one of his dirty secrets.

However he will call you while he’s doing it so you can give him instructions, that shit really turns him on.

♡彡 K = Kink : One or more of their kinks.

• He’s a kinky bastard so I’m not gonna go into detail with all of them but here’s a little list:

— Pegging, both degradation and praise (depending the mood), choking and spanking, spit (kinda), overstimulation and edging, b r e e d i n g, cumplay, voyeurism, biting and scratching, and sensory depravation.

♡彡 L = Location : Favorite places to do the deed.

• Probably his bed, he likes to be comfortable in the meantime yknow.

♡彡 M = Motivation : What turns them on/keep them going?

• Mainly moans and just being really vocal in general. He absolutely adores when you talk him trough it.

Also, being kinda rough. It awakens something in him lmao.

♡彡 N = No : Something they wouldn’t do/turn off’s

• There aren’t many things that he wouldn’t do tbh, he’s a pretty open person and he’s probably open to do a lot of things at least once y’know. However he can’t do public humiliation, or just very public stuff in general (like fucking in a park or something). It creeps him out a little bit, and he’ll probably be too nervous to proceed.

♡彡 O = Oral : Preference on giving/receiving, skill, etc.

• He doesn’t mind either tbh, I guess it’s really depending the mood, but he doesn’t really a preference when it comes to that.

He’s pretty skilled tho, and a very fast learner so it wouldn’t take him long to figure out what you like. And once he knows, he wouldn’t mind spending hours just eating you out and swallowing your cum over and over again <3

♡彡 P = Pace : Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? Etc.

• He can be both to be honest, it depends on the mood and what he’s planning to do with you if u know what I mean,,,,

♡彡 Q = Quickie : Their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.

• Not a big fan of them tbh.

He’d rather spend a whole night/afternoon just going at it. However he doesn’t mind a quick blowjob or handjob (for either of you), every once in a while.

♡彡 R = Risk : Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? Etc.

• Oh he’s willing to take a few risks lmao.

He’s a very open and experimental person when it comes to sex, so don’t be a afraid to tell him anything new that you wanna try, he’ll probably say yes to everything lol.

♡彡 S = Stamina : How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last? Etc.

• If he’s subbing, he can go for hours. It’s almost as if he’s craving it (he is lmao).

If he’s domming, then he can go for a round or two, but it’s most likely for him to take a little break to check on you or just finger you for a little while.

♡彡 T = Toys : Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?

• Oh yeah he definetly does have a couple of toys. He’s most likely to buy an entire collection with his partner tbh.

He likes to use them himself and on his partner (or his partner use them on him lmao). Again, he’s very experimental, and he actually did grow a liking for vibrators and cock rings lmao.

♡彡 U = Unfair : How much do they like to tease?

• He’s a cheeky bastard. 100% will tease you to no end while you’re busy only so you can punish him later.

♡彡 V = Volume : How loud are they? What sounds they make? Etc.

• He’s l o u d. I said before that noise turns him on, so of course he’s gonna be very vocal in general.

He pants a lot, and when he’s being overstimulated he makes the sweetest whines and high pitch moans it’s just <3

Also, expect a lot of “Hmm you like it when I do that, don’t you?” “You want it? Beg for it” “Such a lovely little slut for me aren’t you?” When he’s on top.

♡彡 W = Wild card : A random headcannon for the character.

• When he’s jerking off alone, he likes to do it sitting down in front of his full length mirror in his room. Completely naked. And he does it until he cums at least twice.

♡彡 X = X-Ray : Let’s see what’s going on under those clothes.

• HE HAS SUCH A PRETTY DICK I JUST KNOW IT.

About average size and width, but it’s so pretty and perfect omg. Slightly curved upwards, and it’s pretty pale, with the tip in a soft pink (it turns more red when overstimulated oops). Also, it’s very sensitive on the head, touch it a few times with the pads of your fingers and he might cum just with that if he’s turned on enough.

♡彡 Y = Yearning : How high is their sex drive?

• It’s pretty high not gonna lie lmao.

But he keeps it undercontrol,,,, most of the time.

♡彡 Z = Zzz : How quickly do they fall asleep afterwards?

• If it’s been a long session, then probably pretty quickly (baby boy is tired ok 🥺), though he always refuses to fall asleep unless he gets to cuddle with you while you play with his hair and whisper some reassurance cuz y’know, sometimes degradation can take the best of him :(

#sugawara koushi #sugawara hcs #sugawara smut #sugawara x reader #sugawara headcannons #sugawara hq #sugawara koshi #sugawara kōshi #sugawara x you #sugawara x y/n #haikyuu!! #haikyuu hcs #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #hq smut #hq hcs #hq headcannons #hq x reader #hq x you #[🌸]— koushi #[🎀]— txt.

[imagineurfavs]

E’LAST: Choi In A-Z

“Oh my god I saw you write for E'last and I've never seen someone that writes for them before! Can I please request a nsfw A-Z for Choi In? Thank you~!”

A/N: aaah finally an e’last request fgfg I’ve never seen anyone who writes for them either lol, tbh i wasnt sure there was even any e’last fans here dkdkj 

----------

A - Aftercare In’s idea of aftercare literally just consists of a big ‘ol cuddle lol. Just laying together and talking, laughing, just generally being cute dkdkdj

B - Body Part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner) On himself, he likes his mouth. He’s confident in his skills with his lips and he knows how much you like them too. On his partner he likes their stomach, he loves keeping his hands on the soft skin of your lower stomach as you ride him. He also thinks it looks super pretty covered in his cum oop.

C - Cum Kinda just like, lets it happen lol. He prefers to cum inside you just bc it feels more sweet and romantic to him lol, but it’s not something he’s too bothered with. As well as almost asking for permission to cum, he’ll ask you where you want him to cum so it all depends where you want it lol. “can i cum, please...where? Where do you want it? Can I-?”

D - Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs) Mans wishes he was more dominant than he actually is. But he just doesn’t think he has it in him to be totally that way. Sometimes he wants to see you the whimpering mess he often ends up as, but he just cant do it. Or at least not seriously lol

E - Experience I mean...idk. He doesn’t strike me as someone who’s had a whole lot of experience but the man is 25 years old lol so he’s probably had some. I feel like, enough to know what he’s doing but he’s not gonna have tried everything he’s wanted to.

F - Favourite Position Mans a subby boi, so he likes it when you take control. He loves having you ride him; just keep him pinned down and maybe tie his wrists to the headboard too oop. There are times when he’s a bit more in control and he loves just snapping his hips into you from behind, but that’s usually when he’s just like, super needy and just needs to cum. 

G - Goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous etc) I dont think In is someone who could be 100% serious like...ever. He’s just so smiley and full of love I think that would definitely cross over into the bedroom. He just has such a sweet air to him that even when he’s like in the zone, he still likes to keep things light-hearted and fun. 

H - Hair (how well groomed are they) Super well groomed; aaaaalmost bare but not quite

I - Intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect) He’s not not intimate...if that counts for anything lol. He tends to like things to be more light and fun. He doesn't like the atmosphere to be too heavy. 

J - Jack Off (Masturbation) I’d say pretty often tbh. Whenever he does get the urge, even if its in the middle of the day, he gets so needy he has to go and take care of himself. Like he can’t focus on anything else until he’s moved his brain out of his dick and back into his head lol.

K - Kinks (one of more of their kinks) As I said before lol. This man is a sub; not 100% however, but like 9 times out of 10 he just wants to be totally under your control. He’s a well behaved sub though, he thrives on praise. Tell him how well he’s doing, how good he makes you feel and he’ll be a whimpery mess in no time. 

L - Location (Favourite places to do the do) Prefers to keep things within the bedroom largely for privacies sake. But if you had your own place to yourselves, I think he’d like be open to doing it literally anywhere lol. 

M - Motivation (What turns them on) Praise praise praise. Even in the most innocent of settings, just hearing “You’re doing so well!” “You’re so good at this!” just makes his brain go into obedient sub mode lmao like “yes...I am good, let me be good for you”

N - NO (something they won't do, turn offs) He’s not into anything involving pain, either giving or receiving. It’s just something he doesn’t see the point in. Like “why tf would you wanna hurt someone you’re supposed to be making feel good?” He just doesn’t get it.

O - Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) When receiving, he honestly just turns to total jelly like, no matter what position y’all started in, he’ll end up laying on his back with his hand in your hair, just...a mess. When giving, he’ll start off a little shyly, but the second he starts to get a reaction from you, or if you give him some praise, he’ll go all in. He has zero shame in making the most lewd noises against you, he’ll keep going until the only thing you can say is his name. Honestly makes his ego swell like no other lol.

P - Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc) It depends if he’s in sub mode or not lol. When you're taking control he likes it on the more slower side, like, much more kinda...sensual and deep movement lol. On the fewer occasions he’s not in sub mode, his pace is kinda erratic, like, short sharp thrusts, getting harder as he gets closer to finishing.

Q - Quickies (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc) Loooooves them. Boy gets so needy so quickly sometimes he just needs to take you both away somewhere and go at it lol. Even then he needs you to take control, hell be asking “please, please let me cum” “I need to cum fuck please”. Lowkey though, having you edge him in a situation like this is such a guilty pleasure of his too.

R - Risk (are they down to experiment, do they take risks?) Oh absolutely, for sure. He’ll give anything a go if it piques his interest enough lol. More often than not he’ll be the one who will bring things up to you that he wants to try, he’s probably got like a list of things that he’s slowly checking off that he wants to try lmao

S - Stamina (how many rounds can they go, how long do they last? etc) He’s probably a one and done kinda guy lol. You might get a second round out of him but you’d have to give him a decent amount of time in between lmao

T - Toy (do they own toys do they use them on a partner or on themselves?) A big fan of sensory deprivation kinda toys; blindfolds, restraints etc. He’ll use them on you if you ask him to but he really loves being the one who's being restrained.

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease) There are times when he wants to tease you, but he’s just really not very good at it lol. 

V - Volume (how loud are they, what type of sounds they make) Quiet little whimpery type noises, he’s quite shy about them so he usually buries his face in your neck or comes in for a kiss so they're not as loud. But jokes on him bc they're so v v pretty ;((((

W - Wild Card (a random headcannon) There have only been a handful of times he’s tried to be more dominant, and both times have ended in you both just being a laughing mess. He just can’t  take himself seriously like that. Like he’ll have you pinned beneath him, trying to say something dirty but he just can’t get the words out without laughing. Even whilst he’s trying to pound into you, he’s still letting out little giggles bc he can’t quite believe what he’s doing. If you praise him enough though, and tell him how much you like seeing him like this, he might just start getting used to being the one in control lol.

X - X-ray (what's going on inside those pants) pretty average I’d say, maybe a little smaller, on the slimmer side but lowkey a super pretty pink colour oop

Y - Yearning (How high is their sex drive) I wouldn’t say its overly high, but when he is in the mood, he gets so so needy. Like he’ll be whiney and grabby, pls give him what he needs ;((

Z - Zzz... (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards) He wont fall asleep for a good while afterwards tbh. He’ll be so happy and smiley that he’ll just wanna stay up with you forever lol. If he does actually go to sleep, he’ll be sure to wait for you to fall asleep first.

#e'last reactions #e'last smut #choi in smut #choi in reactions #elast reactions #elast smut #elast scenarios #e'last scenarios #choi in scenarios #choi in imagines #kpop smut #kpop reactions #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines

[jinkicake]

Just A Touch Of Your Love

Kenma, Daichi, Tendou, Tsukishima with a s/o who isn’t really comfortable/fairly familiar with physical touch. 

Kozume Kenma x Reader

Sawamura Daichi x Reader

Tendou Satori x Reader

Tsukishima Kei x Reader

Sorry I didn’t post this last night Anon, I hit a dead-end where I couldn’t type anything TT I was in a funk and nothing was really sounding right, I hope this is okay though! I grew up with brothers so I still do flinch quite a lot whenever people move too quickly,,,,, it kinda makes for some awkward conversations LOL but in truth I just used to get my shit rocked all the time. It made me super tough though! (▼-▼*)

WC- 2,252

~~~

Kozume Kenma

I think Kenma would be able to understand this really well

He seems like the type to dislike being touched, it might be because he just doesn’t like it or because it isn’t something he is used to, I don’t think he is a physical touch person

Therefore, he would be very understanding and respectful of your space, he would always ask before touching you and just to make sure you’re okay with it

Kenma wants to make sure you are comfortable~

And in return you do the same with him,,,, relationships are all about exploring and learning the other person so I feel like Kenma would really appreciate if you also respected his boundaries

That doesn’t mean he isn’t going to cuddle you or hug you because,,,, he is but he just needs to get used to it

If you ever flinch around him, he would get really worried

He’d straight out ask you why you don’t like being touched, not in a rude way but he is genuinely curious

Kenma would be such a good listener and would probably be able to help you feel better, he’d never invalidate your feelings!

Little by little, you both will become more secure in the touches you want to give the other

“I can’t stand whenever people touch me.” Kenma winces as another person brushes past his shoulder, he has to refrain from rolling his eyes. He glances down at where you are practically shoved into his chest, looking just as uncomfortable. “Are you okay?” He asks and you mutter back a ‘fine’. “I know it’s rush hour but we will get off soon, it’s just a few more stops.” He tells you quietly and you nod, trying to focus on his voice.

Once the two of you finally get to your stop, you feel like you can breathe again. You step off the train with light feet and glance at Kenma to make sure he is behind you. At the last second, an older man knocks his shoulder into yours, making you wince and Kenma has barely any time to pull you close to him before the train closes once again.

“What a dick.” Your boyfriend glares at the receding train, his eyes practically freeze the businessman in place. “(Y/N), are you okay?” He asks again and you nod, though you’re mentally replaying the scene over and over again.

“I’m not used to people touching me, I kind of hate it.” You tell him quietly and Kenma looks at his hands clutching your shoulders. “I like when you touch me though, d-don’t worry!” You throw him a reassuring smile and Kenma nods slightly.

“I don’t like when people touch me, it feels gross in a way.” He confesses and you nod understandingly. “I like when you touch me though, I always have. I guess it just takes time to get used to.” 

His words make you feel better, Kenma is always so understanding and supportive with any of the issues you face.

“We have time, right?” You ask him timidly and Kenma hooks his pinky in yours while you two walk towards the exit of the station.

“Yeah, we do.”

Sawamura Daichi

I feel like Daichi would pick up on the way you act around others when he first starts crushing on you..... He’d notice very quickly the way you avoid your friend’s touches

Probably after you start dating he would ask you about it, because he wants to make sure he doesn’t make you uncomfortable. When you explain that you just aren’t used it, Daichi will definitely note it

Daichi would be very cautious with you, I feel like he would be really good at making sure you feel relaxed

He would be more protective of you when around others and will always act like a barrier whenever you started getting nervous

Daichi would notice very quickly how you flinch or wince away from his touches

He’d be really worried and put his hand on your shoulder, just hovering it over your shirt, to see how you would react

His mind would run for hours and he’d ultimately confront you with asking what’s wrong, why you flinch away from his touches

It’s not in an overbearing, guilt way, Daichi is just really worried that is was something bad that happened in the past

He would always reassure you and tell you that he’d never hit you, never lay a hand on you in a violent way

It starts with him gaining your trust little by little but you tell him that he doesn’t have to worry too much because you already enjoy his touch so much~ just not too much of it,,,

“Hey babe,” Daichi calls from behind you, you look at the doorway of the classroom and smile when you notice your post-practice boyfriend.

“Hi, Daichi.” You smile and then clean up your supplies, messily shoving them into your bag. “Hold on, I was just finishing my homework.”

Daichi gives you a small encourage praise, telling you how smart you are, before ruffling your hair. You can’t help but laugh at the act of endearment while the two of you walk out of the building. When you get to the gates of the school you notice a few other players still left from practice and you timidly stare at the ground.

“Hey (Y/N)!” Sugawara waves and you give him a gentle smile before waving back. You notice a few of the first years running out of the gym and you jump behind Daichi, almost getting nailed by the hyper duo.

“Oi!” Daichi calls at Kageyama and Hinata but they’re already too far gone to ever hear. “Are you okay?” He asks quietly and you nod, squeezing his arm reassuringly. You continue to talk with Sugawara for a few more minutes before you split up and walk your separate ways home. “You’re so quiet today, are you sure everything is okay?” Daichi asks, carefully looking at you and you simply shrug. 

“I’m just tired, I guess.” You yawn and refrain from leaning your head on Daichi’s shoulder.

“You can use me for support.” Your boyfriend offers out his arm and you glance between his wrist and his eyes.

“Really? Are you sure?” You ask and Daichi nods reassuringly, gently motioning to his arm. You grab onto his jacket and cautiously rest your head on his shoulder. “Is this okay?”

“Yup, it’s perfectly fine,” Daichi tells you and you bite the inside of your cheek. His body heat slowly starts to warm you up and you start randomly talking about things that happened today. Daichi continues to smile down at you with fond eyes, listening, and hanging onto your every word while brushing his hand against your own. His subtle touches like this make you feel so safe, it’s a feeling you never thought you’d experience.

Tendou Satori

Listen, Tendou is going to have a hard time with this one

He just seems like the type whose love language is physical touch

So he might not pick up on it at first,,,, he just wants to shower you in all his love and hugs and everything he can do

However, when Tendou starts to notice the way you cower away from his hands or you avoid his hugs he would be worried

He would ask you about it and when you tell him that you aren’t really comfortable with touching people because of things that happened in the past, then Tendou would mentally facepalm himself

He’d be really relieved though, I feel like he would try joking and say something like ‘I thought it’s because I smelled bad!’

Tendou just wants you to feel the best, the same way he feels whenever he is with you

He’d slowly work up your tolerance with his touches, little things like holding your pinky or simply brushing his hand against yours

It’s not that you dislike the way he touches you because you actually enjoy them, it’s just that you can’t help but be too cautious with them

Tendou now knows this, which is why he is much more careful with you, he’d never want to do anything to make his precious Angel feel cornered :-(

“All I’m saying (Y/N),” Tendou spits jokingly. “if I were there at the agni kai I would have fought alongside Azula. Fuck a bitch named Katara.” Your boyfriend has been ranting for the last twenty minutes about the ending of Avatar and why he thinks there should have been a fourth season. “I’ll start bending the lightning.” He threatens and shoots his hand up into the air to ‘redirect lightning’, the sudden movement causes you to flinch and curl in on yourself and Tendou jumps back dramatically at your movement. He tilts his head curiously and you offer him a small reassuring smile like you didn’t just back away from his touch. “Baby, I’m not going to actually electrocute you, ”

Tendou gently cups your face and frowns at the way you wince at his touch, you’re staring at his hands like they burn you. It isn’t that his touch is bad, you’re just not used to it. Tendou knows this and in return has scaled back his love language of physical touch to help you feel more comfortable, but here and there he does slip up.

“You don’t like this?” He asks and you know it’s not in a way to make you feel guilty, Tendou genuinely wants to know if you're okay with this.

“No, I do like it,” You whisper and stare at the ground. “I’m just not used to it so it feels weird.” It feels nice to get this off your chest and Tendou internally fights with himself between backing away or holding you close. Instead, you make the decision for him. Your hands come up and cup his own as you give him a gentle smile. “I really like your touch Tendou.”

Your boyfriend goes quiet and you get a little nervous at his reaction, he is internally melting at how cute you are. Keep it together Tendou, keep it together.

“And I really, really like you (Y/N)~”

Tsukishima Kei

Tsukishima is another person who strikes me as one who doesn’t like being touched too much

Whether that is just an assholey thing, like me, or it is awkward for him…. Idk,,

All I know is this mf doesn’t like being touched unless he actually likes the person like Yamaguchi or Nishinoya

You’d think with that big head of his, heyyyy big head, he would also note the way you aren’t really comfortable with being touched

He doesn’t….. This mf just thinks it is because of him, that you don’t like being touched by him

This will end up with him bottling his feelings, like Tsukishima does, until he eventually grows tired and explodes

Telling you all sorts of things he doesn’t mean and you’re just standing there like…. What

And then you explain to him that you just aren’t a fan of being touched that much, though you do really like the way he touches you and Tsukishima is like,,, ‘oh so I am the asshole’

This confrontation though would make him much more understanding and it would probably clear out the tense air that was hanging around the two of you, it makes Tsukishima appreciate you even more and you both would become even closer

Maybe one day it’ll come to the point where you have to beg Tsukishima for touches and not the other way around LOL

“Do you even like me?” Tsukishima asks one day while you’re walking home after school, you turn to him in complete confusion. What brought this up? Tsukishima scoffs at your expression and takes it as a motive to continue. “You don’t like it when I touch you.” He states and at that moment, brushes his hand against yours. You pull your hand back to your side at the soft touch, not at all expecting him to do that.

“Why would you even date someone if you don’t like them?” Tsukishima’s nose twitches in annoyance and he reaches out to grab your hand, at his quick movement you flinch and bring your hands up to cover your head. Immediately you duck as a reflex. “Huh?” He blinks down at you, his heart tightens in his chest at the way you distance yourself away from him. “Did you think I was going to hit you?”

“Of course not,” You answer quickly and brutally honest, you know Tsukishima would never touch you like that even if teases you and he says he would. “sorry I’m not really accustomed to touches like that yet. I do really like you though.” You bite the inside of your cheek and try to turn your face to hide your embarrassment. Tsukishima internally sighs, fuck, he is an asshole.

“I’m sorry,” He starts and you glance at him in shock. “for scaring you and accusing you of not liking me.” Tsukishima mutters and you quickly open your mouth again but he cuts you off before you can even say anything. “I shouldn’t pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do.”

“I do, I do want to hold your hand and touch you but I just haven’t gotten used to it.” You tell him and Tsukishima hums under his breath. “Do you believe me?"

“Obviously, idiot.” He gentle knocks his knuckles against your forehead, walking closely next to you as you two make your way back to your houses. Tsukishima respects your space and most importantly respects you~

~

Taglist.

@yams046 @why-am-i-sad-and-sleepy @xhanjisungiex @xxashshs @chaosamu @angelkogane @augustdearly @kunimwuah  @lovellucy

#kozume kenma x reader #Daichi Sawamura x reader #tendou satori x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #kenma x reader #daichi x reader #tendou x reader #tsukishima x reader #haikyuu fic #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you

[bonsai62]

Part 1: The Compatibility between Pisces and Capricorn

Hello everyone! Today, since I am hella bored and have nothing to do this fine evening, I am going to talk about the relationship between our two boys; Yuji and Megumi and how much they represent their signs so much.

Before I get started, I am not going to talk about their sex life even though it’s kinda important if you are into astrology, however, for this case I won’t because both of them are minors. But if you want to read more about their comparability then be my guess and look at the underline links. I will provide links in the discussion so you can have a better understanding on how the signs are and use manga pages for you to visually see it.

Also, excuse my English. I am very bad at it! Even though it’s my first language I still have lots of errors in my writing!

Also beware of manga spoilers too!!

Let’s get started on this very long essay!

Traits of a Pisces: Itadori Yuji

Positive: Compassionate (top), empathetic (middle), & creative (bottom)

We also have: Warm/gentle, caring, intellectual, animal lover, and romantic

Here we have the positive side of a Pisces and let me tell you it screams Yuji so damn much. Yuji is such a compassionate guy. I don’t think I have never seen a character who is very compassionate like Yuji (I have but we are talking about Yuji here lol). He can empathize with a whole lot of people and no matter what the situation is he understands. Yuji doesn’t need to have the same experience as someone because he can feel and get in their head to make him understand what their going through. Which brings me to that he has a really high empathy level when it comes to people (I can relate a lot because I have the same thing). However, having a lot of empathy isn’t all that’s cracked up to be but I’ll talk about it soon.

A Pisces is also very creative and they love hobbies. One of Yuji’s favorite hobbies is, I have a feeling is sports but that just based on what his old school thought of him + the baseball game. Plus cooking! Cooking is an amazing hobby and it lets you get creative with your hands and skills! I like to imagine that he is the best cook throughout the school and loves to share with his classmates and have them rate his cooking lol! Cooking is also a relief of stress so I can also imagine him having a bad day and just ends up being in the kitchen.

Now....

Negative: Overly emotional (top), impressionable (bottom), closed off (middle)

I messed up the order lol

We also have: melancholy, lazy, stubborn, moodiness, etc

Yuji is a very emotional person. We have seen him at his best and at his worse. He is such an emotional person that he felt bad for killing Choso’s brothers. His emotions gets the best of him when Junpei died, Megumi was hurt, seeing what Sukuna has done in Shibuya, and Nanamin/Nobara getting destroyed by Mahito. It’s an unhealthy feeling because we’ve seen Yuji get distracted with his injured friends and him kinda fucking up on his fighting. Another unhealthy trait that Yuji had is not talking about himself. We’ve seen him not talk about his feelings and I mean personal deep feelings that’s always going to be in the back of his head. Like when Megumi knows that something happened to Yuji but Yuji simple doesn’t want to talk about and closes it. He doesn’t really like talking about himself and rather hear other people/helping other people rather than face his own demons. If he’s facing his own demons, he rather be doing it on his own.

I also want to point out that many people think that he gets over people’s death hella easily. No... that is not true whatsoever. The boy has been through so much trauma that eventually you just get so tired of crying about it and you don’t have the energy anymore, you eventually start telling yourself “it is what it is” or “what can I do now?”. Noabra is a perfect example. He didn’t need to cry because he had the biggest mental breakdown when it happened. So when he asked Megumi about her status... he just had to say “alright”.

In my theories... she is definitely alive. Again, Gege is playing half of you guys. She is gonna pop out in the next couple of chapters or even the one coming up next.

Another things that I find interesting in Yuji which according to the links I put, Pisces tend to trust people easily:

Ease of being cheated: A desire to see the best things in other people makes the Two Fish very impressionable individuals. They trust others without any suspicions and often suffer from their frivolity. Any pressure of stronger people is accepted as a command for them and they easily agree with them without any doubts.

For instant, Todo and Choso. Those two mf were about to kill him but they didn’t because of what Yuji’s mind fuck did (I know Gege sensei said that isn’t a theory but still it’s mind fuck lol) He instantly call Todo his best friend like I can hear Nobara (Big sis) twitching somewhere lol. Whenever I think of Yuji and Todo’s relationship, I think of Vinny and Paula D from Jersey Shore haha!

Any who, while trusting people isn’t a bad thing, you still don’t know what their intentions are and everything. It’s a very naive thing to do.

But I felt for Yuji and Choso... Yuji didn’t have much of a choice...

I would like to know what changed Yuji’s mind into staying with Choso. I’m curious how Yuji “trusted” being with Choso after everything that went down. Yuji is a very forgiving character too (minus Mahito). But now, I think we can see that Choso has no bad intentions towards Yuji because he “might” be his brother. And their so cute too!!

On to our other boy!

Traits of a Capricorn: Megumi Fushiguro

Positive: Resourcefulness (top), discipline/patient (middle: also thank @pantherbeamish for the photos!), and reliability (bottom)

We also have: Responsibility, loyalty, diligence, team player, etc

Megumi is a very interesting character. Whenever I see him I get more interested in him. He is exactly what you would describe a Capricorn. We have seen Megumi be resourceful when it comes understanding how curse energy works thanks to him. He is very detailed when it comes to explaining and also a very patient man when Yuji, who doesn’t know jack shit about the Jujutsu world. Never, not once, does Megumi call Yuji an idiot for not knowing all these things. That’s what makes him amazing because if it were other Shonen mangas, the “rival” would’ve called Yuji an idiot. The only time Megumi ever calls Yuji an idiot is when Yuji literally does or says something stupid. To me, that is normal and not being a dick about it because we all know that if we had a friend like Yuji we would’ve stared at him like “why are you like this...”

It’s me... I’m a lot like Yuji lol

But no, he is very patient and tries to explain everything to Yuji as best as he can. I have this thing where almost everyone relies on Megumi a lot because he’s a serious guy + very responsible with his tasks. We see Maki trusting Megumi too. Like the time when Megumi was hyping Yuji up saying he can beat everyone in the Kyoto school if they didn’t use curse energy (something like that lol). Yuji also can confirm himself that Megumi is very reliable. He mentioned it while back at the prison because both sibling duo thought they were lost.

Negative: Sensitivity (top), seriousness (middle), reservation (bottom)

We also have: Unforgiving, criticism, suspicion, pickiness, etc

Just like Yuji, we have seen Megumi’s negative side a lot but it’s simply because he’s sensitive and thinks logically. Sometimes, I also feel like he thinks through his heart as well but that’s just me. That is where the sensitivity comes along. Megumi is hella sensitive he doesn’t need to show it because you can feel it.

In the article:

Sensitivity: It is better not to offend Capricorns who are very sensitive people. They can’t stand being laughed at and remain serious in public but feel badly deeply in their souls. Even a minor joke can result in resentment from their side!

In many, many occasions we have seen everyone fucking around or getting on Megumi’s nerves, especially in our recent Jujustroll where Gojo is saying a bunch of nonsense and embarrassing tf out of Megumi. His seriousness gets in the way and that’s what makes him sensitive.

On the side note: I also wanted to add something. As I was reading a few articles, some mentioned that Capricorns are... bland. Please, Capricorns!! No me ataques! I just find it interesting that someone, like Todo, who thinks Megumi is boring. Todo honestly thought he was boring since he first asked him what was his type and while Megumi gave us the best answer, Todo expected something more fun. But no, it was boring. Also, Megumi lives a simple life. Now, I’m not saying that Megumi is boring because as a matter of fact I like how simple he is. He likes to keep things neutral. Personally, on his activities he is considered “bland” and honestly, I can see why but I would still go out my way to enjoy it with him if I was his significant other lol I also feel like he has a good sense of style in fashion. I’m saying that judging from the official arts + “Lost In Paradise” because in that ED Megumi be looking like a bowl of fruits. A bowl of snacks lmao!

But, anyways! Megumi is also reserved to himself. He does not like talking about himself at all (hon hon does that sound like someone?). He doesn’t open up to a lot of people but I kinda feel like he does with Gojo but that’s just because Gojo raised him and he just knows when Megumi is feeling a certain way. Also, I bet Gojo just knows when Megumi is having a bad day too. We witnessed him just being in his own bubble in the current arc that is happened in the anime. Yuji and Nobara calls him out about him being so reserved to himself. He does eventually tells them what is going on, but it takes a lot for a Capricorn to open up and it’s totally understandable. I feel as if you want a Capricorn to open up, you have to let them give you time for them to get to know you. Give them your intentions and put in the effort to make them trust you.

Now in to the fun part!!

1. Trust:

Positive:

Articles 1: They will often understand each other well enough to respect their relationship and keep it clear of dishonesty

I’m a use this imagine again btw because this speaks their relationship clearly

I think what I truly love about their relationship and love the idea of them being an endgame is the trust that they have for one another(even though someone is gonna die). They barely knew each other for 2 months and their chemistry is off the mf charts.

The picture above isn’t just them having an eye opening moment but the fact that they trust each other to save one another.

Megumi had saved Yuji so many time

Yuji had also saved Megumi so many times

Tbh, when I was thinking about Megumi coming in to save Yuji from Yuuta and Naoya, I thought it would be the same as when Yuji saved Megumi and Maki from Hanami, but we got something better. We got to see Megumi never doubting Yuji and always making sure that he gives him as many chances as he gives. I hope that sparks a realization for Yuji because sometimes I always felt that he doesn’t really acknowledges Megumi doing a whole lotta things for Yuji. I’m still complaining about it because if he can say “thank you, best friend” to Todo or “thank you, Kugisaki, for letting me know that I am not alone” to Nobara, then he should definitely see how much Megumi gives a fuck about him.

I expect a “thank for being by my side and never doubting me” for Megumi.

Articles 2: Pisces, who prefers to hand off important decision-making to dominant Capricorn, feeds into the goat’s need to be in control. On the flip side, Capricorn trusts Pisces to attend to its emotional needs—something that can be very difficult to allow at first.

This is interesting because a lot of the time Megumi is always making the plans and the choices. I feel like Yuji tends to rely on Megumi a lot because Yuji respects the way Megumi thinks (I’m not saying he doesn’t do that with anyone either).

Another thing is that:

“Capricorn trust Pisces to attend to its emotional needs-something that can be very difficult to allow at first”

I want to use Yuji asking Yuuta to kill him if Sukuna comes out especially for Megumi’s sake as an example of “emotional needs” because we see that Yuji does not want to be anywhere near Megumi because of Sukuna. In Yuji’s emotional state, he would rather have Yuuta kill him than Megumi. A lot of people also have this head canon that the reason why he asked Yuuta to kill him instead of Megumi is because Megumi already has a lot on his plate or something. I forgot the theory lol

But... I have a feeling that Megumi is gonna end up killing Yuji at the end because it should be him...

But yes,

Let’s see where things end with the current event that is happening now.

But unfortunately, I have to stop right here because Tumblr only allows 10 images in one post. Tragic!

I do hope you guys enjoy and please comment if I’m missing anything with them! Let’s hope I won’t take long with part 2 because I’m hella busy at times! Overall, tell me what you guys think!

#jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen manga #jjk anime #jjk #jjk manga #itadori yuji #fushiguro megumi #anime #manga #soulmates #I love them #our babies #please I’m just rambling and I make no sense #itafushi #fushiita

[singeramg]

Finding Forever: Chapter 2

A/n: Well Hello again everyone! I have been trying to get this chapter up all week. I hope you all enjoy this. Sorry no smut yet, I am a sucker for a good build up lol.

Here is Part 1

Pairing: Henry Cavill/ Black! OFC

Rating: M

A/n Sorry This gif is so big, not sorry about the subject though!

Finding forever: Chapter 2

*Two weeks later*

“Sooo All I’m trying to figure out is why you haven’t made any move on Mr. Cavill?”

Mia thankfully had finally arrived to help me out while I was on set. Her official position was a production assistant but this was also going to serve as some experience on a resume to break into the movie industry doing make up and the like. She was talented she just needed an in which was why I was giving her one. However right now we were sitting in her room a few floors down from my own as she got dressed for one of our rare days off. I wasn’t needed on set and she wasn’t either so we decided to make it a mall and chill day or at least we would if we could ever leave.

“I have not made a move because I am not going to Mi. It’s unprofessional at the least...”

“What’s unprofessional about it? You both are young, attractive people who are in a similar field or work who from the poetic you just waxed about him, has a mutual interest why not go for it.”

“Because I don’t know if he’s interested. I would hate to ruin what could be a wonderful friendship all ‘cause I am getting unrequited romantic thoughts. Why even risk it?”

“You know people would never date at all if they thought like you. Honestly that is probably why you aren’t getting any. Once again, all I’m saying is you miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t shoot Aura Camilla Noemi Suarez- Wright.”

“Did you have to say my full government name?” I sighed.

“Absolutely because you are being stupid.”

“Mia don’t you think if the man was interested he would say something. I’ve thought about this. Long and hard you know and I think that I should let this infatuation die and focus on the job at hand.”

“Too bad thinking is  the not long and hard thing you need...”

“Oh my god get the fuck out of here!”

We laughed and I looked around for something to throw at her for her vulgar comment and stopped once I heard my phone alert me to a text message.

       Henry: Hey darling sorry to bother you but are you in your rooms?

      Aura: Never a bother Henry, Actually no I am not, but I am still in the hotel a few floors down. Did you need something?

      Henry: This is going to sound odd but I actually need to borrow your room???

I looked at my phone for a moment and decided on calling rather than texting. Henry answered on the first ring.

“Most people need to borrow lotion or something. You need my room?”

I said the joking tone, but highly interested in what he needed.

“Yes, you see apparently the folks at this hotel have done something strange to my plumbing to my room. I have no water access and seeing as I have to be on set in a few I was hoping to beg a quick shower?”

As a thought of Henry, wet and steamy in a shower flashed through my mind I kinda froze up

“Aura dear are you there?” He said with mild concern and I hoped that he wouldn’t read too much into my space out.

“Oh... yes I’m sorry. Sure I’ll head back up to let you in.”

“You are wonderful darling.”

We hung up and I explained to Mia where I was going to which she responded that if I needed to cancel because I was about to get Cavill dick then I should send a devil smirking emoji, to which I stuck my middle finger up at her and left her room...

Henry was standing in the hallway at my room on my arrival, looking fresh from the gym and honestly smelling like it too. It was at this moment I knew I was a goner because it didn’t bother me as much as gym smells normally do. He just smelled really masculine to me, and it invoked images on how I could make him sweat like that doing something we would enjoy far more than working out. I opened the door with my key card, and he followed into my suite which had a separate sitting area for entertainment and my bedroom and bathroom closed off from the front. 

“You are a lifesaver. I did not want to turn up on set smelling like an old gym bag. Hope I didn’t inconvenience you too much.”

“No you didn’t as I said I was just a few floors down in Mia’s room. We’ve decided to make the best of our random day off.”

“Oh and what would you two be doing?”

He questioned leaning against the dark wooden desk, which creaked upon his weight. His grey t-shirt pulling taunt against the muscles of his biceps. 

“Just a mall visit and maybe a bite to eat. My call time is quite early tomorrow.”

“That sounds nice. Also I’ve been meaning to ask you about Mia. Seeing as you are her best friend. You would know if she were single?”

I felt my heart drop into my shoe. Even though  I had told myself that I wouldn't pursue anything, his confirmation of being uninterested hurt. Maybe even worse because it was my best friend.

“I...i...ummm yes she is.”

I pretended I felt my phone go off in my pocket.

“Speaking of which this is her. I’ve got to go. Ummm... please use what you need. I’ll see you on set tomorrow. Bye!”

I said quickly, the words tumbling out of my mouth as I headed for the door. I could feel my face getting hot and there was no way I’d let him see me cry, that shit was just not about to happen. I took the stairs and realized I couldn’t go back to Mia’s like this either. I wasn’t the type of friend to begrudge her, her happiness. What if Henry was supposed to be her forever? Who was I to stand in the way of that? I wouldn’t do that to her or him. To make them feel guilty about stupid feelings I shouldn’t have developed anyway? No I wouldn’t do that to them, but all this crushing rejection coupled with the childhood insecurities I had since Mia and I were in school and all of the guys would flock to her iridescent personality and looks while I was stuck as the wallflower. For me this was taking me right back and no matter that  I was now a movie star that some people found attractive it was never who I wanted. What I wanted was always out of reach and now that included Henry Cavill...

A/N: Yes, I know this shorter than what I would have liked but don’t worry the next one is on the way. As always I love interacting so let me know what you think.

-THANKS FOR READING!

#henry cavill x black ofc #henry cavill #henry cavill x ofc #finding forever #fanfic #fanfictions

[madamemalfoywrites]

Professor Carter is Up to No Good

Commission done for the lovely and amazing @mzuul ! Girl thank you so much for letting me write your fucking amazing OCs!! This has got to be my favorite AU of them ^^ Warning for DP and just overall nsfw-ness lol. Enjoy ;D Also its 12k so...this one kinda got away from me lmao. Enjoy!

~

Alan Wilson had made three mistakes that day.

The first being that he may or may not have left his textbook behind on purpose. Anything to have just a few minutes more with Professor Sullivan. It was silly, he knew, to have developed a crush on a teacher, and a man at that. But Alan couldn’t help himself. There was something about the potions master that was just so…rugged, so cunning, so manly. Perhaps that simply came by virtue of being a Slytherin.

Alan was a Hufflepuff himself. And rather garbage at potions, so it went without saying that he’d never catch the professor’s attention even though he really, truly wanted to. It didn’t help that Professor Sullivan was so young, nor that Alan was now in his 7th year. It opened his mind up to possibilities that shouldn’t exist.

He managed to shut himself down though, every time. Because with looks like that, and with such obvious charm (the female professors were always flocking him), there was no chance in hell that Professor Thomas Sullivan would ever be  gay.

Or at least, that was Alan’s full fledged belief, until he stepped into the classroom that day, Professor Sullivan’s back to him, legs spread over one of the tables, and though Alan had no experience with such things, he’d watched enough muggle porn to know that the professor was receiving a blowjob.

What lucky witch had been chosen to do that??

Alan swallowed, frozen, knowing he should run and yet entirely unable to look away, settling for crouching behind the back row of desks. Such had been his second mistake. He should have left when he still had the chance.

“Do you only ever shut up when there’s a dick in your mouth?” Professor Sullivan growled, in a tone that was not his own, hands gripping the girl’s hair with such rough control that it left Alan wondering if this was truly the same, gentle professor he’d always admired.

“I can be louder if you want,” came the reply, and Alan’s blood ran cold.

Because that was no girl.

Wasn’t even a student. In fact, if he’d heard correctly, then that voice belonged to—

“Shut it, Carter. Any more than this and we’ll—” his voice broke off in a groan.

“Isn’t that what makes it exciting?” Professor Carter returned with a moan, and Alan had to throw his hands over his own mouth. His body shouldn’t be reacting to this. Knew that this was wrong, and that he should leave, but those moans held him there, the lewd sounds of Professor Sullivan thrusting into Professor Carter’s mouth.

He’d never thought of Professor Carter in that context before. The Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor was a bit of a bully, particularly so against the Hufflepuffs, and what with his sarcastic manner of speaking Alan hardly ever paid him much attention.

But now here he was, on his knees, sucking off the man who’d been the cause of Alan’s sexual awakening.

This far surpassed any type of awakening, though. He was drowning—could hardly breathe—his dick so hard against his pants he was worried the belt might just start to cut into his flesh.

He wanted to join.

It was so wrong but he wanted to join—he didn’t even care if Professor Carter stayed, just wanted some sort of relief to the ache between his legs, some attention to his parched lips and a voice in his ear that promised praise.

He whimpered at the thought, rubbing his thighs together.

That was his third mistake.

Because silence fell upon them, the eerie quiet of the room striking fear into Alan’s very core.

“Oh?” Professor Carter clicked his tongue, shuffling about as Alan assumed he stood up, “Have we a mouse in our midst?”

Professor Sullivan hissed, cursing under his breath and muttering something else that shook the desks, everything in the classroom parting to reveal a trembling Alan. Professor Sullivan was still not decent. And Alan couldn’t look away.

Professor Carter clicked his tongue, wagging his finger at him, though he was so far away, “My, my, what a naughty little Hufflepuff we have on our hands—”

“Leave it, Ven,” Professor Sullivan tucked himself back into his pants, the sound of the zipper causing a shiver to run down Alan’s spine. Then, Sullivan turned to Alan, those usually brown eyes looking black, and Alan had never been so thankful for his robes in his life, otherwise the two professors would have definitely seen his…reaction.

“What you just saw, Mr. Wilson, will remain between us. Is that understood?”

Alan’s voice failed him. He opened his mouth, and yet no sound came out. His head felt numb, muddled, and if he weren’t feeling so lost in his haze, with those sharp eyes that Professor Sullivan was looking at him with, Alan would have sworn the professor could read his mind.

“I—“

“Is that understood?!”

Alan had never heard Professor Sullivan speak so harshly. It was almost enough to make him cry. “Yes,” he bowed his head, “I’m so sorry—”

“You may leave,” Professor Sullivan continued, with a wave of his hand fixing the desks, and a gust of wind pushing Alan towards the door.

Feet finally finding their movement, Alan dashed for the door, and ran down the hall, not stopping even when he hit the stairs, not stopping even when he made it past his common room, not stopping until his face hit his pillow with full force.

He didn’t know what to do.

Back in the potions classroom, Ven stood beside Thomas, adjusting his robes, “You just let him go,” he said.

“I did,” Alan replied, curtly, with a hint of a growl.

Ven hummed, sliding his hand around Thomas’s waist, “That’s not very much like you. What’re you up to?”

“Nothing that concerns you.”

Eyes widening, Ven let go, “Oh my~ Don’t tell me you went into that poor Hufflepuff’s head?” Thomas looked at him, though he said nothing, which was enough of a confirmation for Ven. “You sly devil! Talent doesn’t give you the right to intrude upon our students~” Even as he said so, however, his voice held no inklings of condemnation. “So, what did you see?”  

The sing-song of Ven’s voice was perhaps what Thomas hated the absolute most.

“Once again, my answer is that it does not concern you.”

“Oh, but it does concern me, doesn’t it? That little mouse was looking deliciously flushed, don’t you think—?”

“He’s our student—”

“He’s of age,” Ven smirked, fingers dancing along Thomas’s collarbone, “but you already knew that, didn’t you? Professor Sull-i-van~”

…

Needless to say, Alan did not get a hair’s amount of sleep that night. After witnessing what he had, he’d spent most of the night wandering aimlessly around the hallways, blush burning holes into his cheeks at the memory that had been imprinted into his brain. When he finally made it to his bed, he just laid there, staring up at the ceiling, replaying the afternoon’s exchange over and over again.

He’d always had feelings for Professor Sullivan. He was a kind and gentle teacher who took the time to answer his students’ questions, and not once was he ever condescending or demeaning about it. It made Alan feel comfortable in his class, and best of all Professor Sullivan always gave credit where credit was due.

It felt good to be praised—to be recognized, every once in a while.

But now that image was wholly ruined. The teacher he’d so admired—for him to be cursing—to be engaging in such activities—in a classroom—with a fellow teacher, no less…

Had it truly ruined his image of the professor, or had it simply enhanced it?

Because as much as Alan tried, he couldn’t help but want to replace Professor Carter, to have Professor Sullivan grabbing at his hair instead, to have him cursing at him because it felt so good, to watch the professor’s head throw back in pleasure and for Alan to feel that hot heat in his own mouth, because how long had it been now, since Alan had begun craving that exact sort of thing?

He covered his face in his hands. Just what was he thinking? How was he supposed to face Professor Sullivan in class tomorrow—or rather, later today? He didn’t even want to look at the clock. The last he’d checked it was well past two in the morning.

But he couldn’t sleep. Because as if all that weren’t bad enough, he was now thinking of Professor Carter as well. Which was as surprising as it was disgusting.

Alan didn’t care much for Professor Carter. A rather rude man by nature, he was. But there had to be more to him—had to be more, if Professor Sullivan was choosing to engage with him in such a way. And Professor Sullivan seemed to be enjoying the pleasure Professor Carter was giving him quite a bit.

Was that what it was? Was Professor Carter skilled in that department? With such a sharp tongue and his loose manner of speaking, Alan had always assumed him to be more of a playboy, but…

Had Professor Carter seduced Professor Sullivan? Had he perhaps placed him under some sort of spell?

No, not likely. Professor Sullivan was a Potions Master. They were a rather cunning sort of lot, potions professors. But then that meant they were both doing this out of their own volition. That meant that whatever Professor Carter was doing—Professor Sullivan wanted it done to him.

Which sent Alan’s mind reeling. Just what, exactly, was Professor Carter doing that Professor Sullivan was so desperate for? To the point that they couldn’t even wait to get behind closed doors, choosing to risk it in the middle of the classroom instead?

Did Professor’s Carter mouth feel that good…?

Alan shivered, half wanting to know, half cursing himself for the fact. Professor Carter was tall—had rather long fingers, in fact. No doubt they felt good, if he were to caress someone. The men hadn’t been kissing from what Alan had seen, but he was sure they were quite skilled in that regard as well. To be kissed by both of them at once…

No no no, what was he thinking? That was disgusting! It was obnoxious! It was selfish! It was—it was cheating. His heart belonged to Professor Sullivan and Professor Sullivan only. To also be thinking of Professor Carter now in such a way, when he never had before—that was adultery. He should be looking to Professor Carter as a rival, not as a potential boyfriend.

Though, then again, if Professor Carter was his rival, then Alan didn’t stand a single chance. The two couldn’t be more different. Alan had neither the charm nor the wit that Professor Carter had. He was a Slytherin who was confident in every regard, who was playful and fun and sure of himself and—the complete opposite of Alan.

Alan was afternoons in the library and leaving quidditch games early because there were too many people in the crowd.  

Still, he couldn’t shake the sounds from his memory, of the images that he’d only half seen—that his mind had been only too eager to complete. How would it feel, exactly, to be in Professor Carter’s mouth?

No no no!! NO! What was he doing? What was he thinking? Was he so depraved? Did he not jack off enough on his own? Was it just because of the exchange he’d seen that his mind was reeling like this? Of course it was different than just watching porn, but he hadn’t expected it to be so…raw—so real.

Everything that had happened in that room—it’d all been so real. Maybe that was why Alan couldn’t seem to comprehend, could seem to wrap his head around the fact that it had actually happened, that he’d actually witnessed it, that Professor Sullivan had let him leave with nothing more than a feeble warning.

Because it was a warning at best. There were no guarantees that Alan wouldn’t spread the rumor.

Maybe…maybe he could use this as leverage to get Professor Sullivan to go on a date with him…

No. No, Alan wasn’t capable of something so underhanded. His feelings for Professor Sullivan were real. And so he wanted Professor’s Sullivans feelings to be real, should he ever decide to reciprocate them. Because Alan…Alan had been feeling like this for quite some time.

Fourth year, was when Alan probably realized it. When he just happened to see Thomas Sullivan returning from quidditch practice, shirt all askew as he laughed with his friends, the lot of them only half dressed because the weather had been uncharacteristically boiling that day.

The seventh year’s laugh had been absolutely captivating to Alan. His confidence more so, and the gleaming stretch of toned skin even more than that.

But Thomas was so much older, and Head Boy at that, and Alan was nothing but a measly Hufflepuff, so the times they ever ended up passing one another, Alan could count on one hand.

He’d never expected the seeker to return to Hogwarts as a professor.

That was just like him, though. Thomas had been brilliant from the start. And regardless of whatever had happened that afternoon, even if his partner was a man, and a fellow professor, Thomas Sullivan deserved more peace of mind than Alan’s sputtered words.

Which was precisely why that next afternoon, Alan went into potions with the intention to apologize. Thoroughly. Only, he never got the chance, because Professor Sullivan began the lecture right away, and then they jumped straight into recreating a recipe, of which Alan always greatly struggled with, and so most of his focus became dedicated to that.

That is, until Professor Sullivan came right up behind him. Alan could tell from the scent of his cologne, and that intimidating heat that was smoldering against his back.

“Juniper leaves?”

Alan swallowed, “Yes, sir.”

The Professor hummed. Alan’s heart pounded. Had he gotten it wrong? The recipe was written partially in riddles. But he was almost certain the directions called for juniper.

This potion wasn’t about to blow up in his face, was it? He’d heard stories of students having their eyebrows burnt off. But then came the strong hand on his shoulder, the subtle squeeze from Professor Sullivan’s large hand, his hot breath on the shell of Alan’s ear, “Well done, Mr. Wilson.”

It wasn’t quite a shiver, that went down Alan’s spine. More like a chilled trickle, one that threatened to leave tremors in its wake, but was wholly outdone by the professor’s heat radiating against Alan’s back.

His ear burned.

“Th-Thank you, Professor.”  

“However, if you’d like to make your potion more effective…”

Professor Sullivan was talking. Was certainly talking but it was muddled in Alan’s ears. Despite that the tone of his voice was perfectly clear, dulcet as velvet, straightforward and assertive and yet still hopelessly caring, because Professor Sullivan genuinely wanted his students to succeed.

Professor Sullivan eventually left, without so much as a single word as to everything that’d happened yesterday evening.

Which should have been the end of it.

But Alan had Defense Against the Dark Arts after lunch. And he had a feeling Professor Carter wouldn’t be nearly as docile as Professor Sullivan had been.

Alan spent the entirety of his lunch hour mulling over the fact. He didn’t know much about Professor Carter, but he was about as Slytherin as they came. How he and Professor Sullivan could belong to the same house was a tragedy at best. Professor Carter—Ven Carter, that was his name, even the sound of it was snake-like—was supposedly one of the most brilliant wizards of his time. One had to be, to teach something like Defense Against the Dark Arts, but you’d hardly know it, what with how carelessly he taught his classes.

No, well, perhaps carelessly wasn’t the right word. He allowed his students to make mistakes. Or rather—he pushed his students towards mistakes. Because in order to defend yourself from dark magic, “you must always stay on your toes.”

Alan didn’t quite agree. There was no use being on your toes if you didn’t know what to do in the first place. A vagrant few managed to pass his class with high marks, but the overwhelming majority got through scraping with the lowest possible scores.

Professor Carter’s class was, in all respects, a nightmare.

Which made it all the more terrifying, Alan thought, when Professor Carter did nothing to him. Said nothing to him, gave away nothing, said not a single sentence that might have held malicious meaning. Alan had remained as invisible as ever.

In many ways, Alan was relieved. In others…annoyed.

Exactly why he was annoyed he couldn’t particularly pinpoint. Had Professor Carter not cared enough to remember? Was Alan so forgettable and insignificant that he wasn’t even worth a brief moment of torment? It was one of Professor Carter’s favorite pastimes, after all. Making students noticeably uncomfortable in front of their peers. It was why no one dared act out in any of his classes. The man had an uncanny ability to read into his student’s weaknesses.

Was Alan so…bland?

No, well, he already knew the answer to that. Alan would hardly be worth anyone’s time.

Unless…Professor Carter actually felt threatened…?

No, no no, what was Alan thinking? A man like Ven Carter couldn’t possibly feel threatened by a student like Alan. There was nothing to be threatened by.

Although…

Alan was aware of the number of complaints the Headmaster received in regards to Professor Carter. About how his class was impossible to pass and how he would single students out. If the Headmaster were to receive news of inappropriate sexual conduct, then…

Wouldn’t that be the end of Professor Carter’s stay at Hogwarts?

And…following that logic…wouldn’t it be the end of Professor Carter’s relationship with Thomas…?

Alan could never threaten Professor Sullivan. He was simply too good of a person. But Professor Carter was an entirely different situation. If the blackmail only concerned Professor Carter, then the man was simply getting what he deserved.

It was gutsy, and risky, and horrifically uncharacteristic, but Alan stayed after class. He’d never had leverage over anyone before—let alone a professor, of all things—but if nothing else came of this then he could at least get some decent marks on his upcoming Dark Arts exams.

“Did you fall asleep with your eyes open?” Professor Carter dropped a book right in front of Alan, the sound making the Hufflepuff jump, “Class is over.”

Chewing his bottom lip raw, Alan cleared his throat, “I-I wanted to talk to you—”

“If you’re going to stutter through it don’t bother. I’ve other things to do—”

“Like blow Professor Sullivan?”

He regretted it the moment it left his mouth. In all honesty, Alan didn’t know where the words had come from, or why they’d been so quick to jump out. But all he knew now was that he was most definitely going to die.

Professor Carter’s expression didn’t darken, however, the way Alan thought it might, like a villain on all of those muggle television shows. His lips did, however, curl into a smile that sent shivers down Alan’s spine. Objectively, Alan didn’t quite know which was worse.

“Precisely.”

That was terrifying. Professor Carter wasn’t even trying to deny it. Was acting like it was completely normal to be discussing such a thing with a student.

“Now if you don’t mind,” Professor Carter continued, “Thomas doesn’t like to be kept waiting—”

“No!” Alan shook, his fists trembling at his sides. He’d begun to sweat, but he was too far in now to simply walk away with his tail between his legs. “Wh-What you two are doing is indecent. It’s wrong—! If you—i-if you don’t want me to say anything to the headmaster, then—”

A chair clattered, making Alan jump. Professor stood up, outstretching his arms so that his robes looked like wings. The man towered over him. “Forgive me,” he continued to smile in that unnerving way, “my hand must have slipped.” He reached for the chair, putting it right-side-up again. “Do continue,” Professor Carter sat in it, crossing his right leg over his left. He motioned with his hand, “I believe you were just about to threaten me.”

Alan licked his lips, swallowing down again. He couldn’t stop shaking. Even if Professor Carter seemed perfectly calm, even he had to have some sense of fear regarding the headmaster, right?

“I want high marks on my next three exams!”

“Do well, and I’ll happily grade them as such—”

“I-I know you know what I mean! I-If you don’t—don’t pass me with high marks then—then I’ll—”

“Aw,” Professor Carter pouted, scooting on the chair so that it scraped against the floor, leaning over Alan with an absurdly dark aura, “or what? You’ll report me? And what will you say, Mr. Wilson? ‘I saw Professor Carter sucking Professor Sullivan off and I wish it would have been me instead’—”

“That’s not true—!”

“Isn’t it?”

Something happened. Alan wasn’t sure what, but it felt like a punch to the stomach, all air knocked straight and clean out of his lungs. His head was spinning—or maybe his body was—but he didn’t think Professor Carter would go so far as to hit him, especially when…

He could hear himself breathing. And when he finally took a moment to look around, he realized he was no longer in Professor Carter’s class. He was still in Hogwarts, certainly, but it felt blurry—as if his eyes weren’t fully focused—as if he’d been crying.

“Hey cheer up,” Professor Sullivan—no—Thomas was in front of him, giving his shoulder a quick pat, “maybe Hufflepuff will win the next game.” He laughed, that large hand ruffled his hair, Alan feeling that pleasant warmth in his cheeks again, “You first years get so emotional.”

Alan remembered that. That was from his first year at Hogwarts. It was the night of the final quidditch game, but that hadn’t meant anything to Alan. It just so happened to be the same night he’d lost his mother’s necklace. It was all he really had left of his parents. He was so relieved when he finally found it again that he’d begun to cry. Thomas had happened to run into him, then.

But that was Alan’s memory. Why did it feel like he was reliving the event?

“How quaint,” Professor Carter’s voice sounded in his head. “But let’s fast forward a bit, shall we?”

The scenes whirled as though Alan were truly traveling through his own memories. Was Professor Carter a Legilimens?

They made it to Alan’s fourth year, on that day with the sweltering summer heat, where Alan finally noticed the sweat dripping down the seventh year’s stomach, to that very same night when Alan…

Professor Carter saw everything. Saw Alan completely exposed, saw how the Hufflepuff had defiled himself over and over again, Thomas’s name on his lips, the endless days Alan spent in his fourth year trying to see as much as he could of the seeker, his failed attempt to join the quidditch team, the day where they happened to brush shoulders in the hallway, the one time Alan nearly fell in the middle of the Great Hall only to be held up by Thomas, the endless confession letters Alan wrote and then threw away, and the very last day of school, where he didn’t even get to see Thomas, and spent the entire day in his room being miserable about it.

And then came the first day of Alan’s own seventh year. Where he walked into potions, thinking he was in one of his own fantasies, thinking that it was fate and yet knowing it wasn’t, wanting to blurt out everything all over again and yet knowing he was too much of a coward to do anything of the sort.

And all of it—every single memory—was bitterly mocked by Professor Carter’s vile tongue.

When the Professor finally got out of his head, a huge burst of air rushed to fill Alan’s lungs, and he was back in the Professor’s classroom, bones feeling like mush and head positively spinning. He knew he was breathing—but it hardly felt like it.

After finally catching his breath, he still found himself leaning against the desk for support. “You can’t—“ he exhaled, “That’s illegal! What you’ve done is an entire rape of my consciousness! The Headmaster will have you sacked—!”

Professor Carter only laughed. But that was demented. Alan had the upper hand. He was sure of it.

“Oh? Is that what you’re going to do? Report me? I’m quivering.” He laughed again, kicking his feet up onto the desk.

Alan swallowed, “You’ll lose your credibility. Your profession, your rank, everything you’ve ever worked towards—”

Again, Professor Carter began to laugh. He was far too relaxed. The laugh far too carefree. Just what had he gotten himself into?

“If it will make you that happy, then go ahead and report me. I am a firm believer that people should always follow their base desires.”

“I will,” Alan retorted. “And this isn’t a base desire! It’s a matter of illegal magic use an-and inappropriate conduct—”

“I do wonder though,” the professor drawled, “what will Thomas think of you, when he realizes you’re the reason he’s been fired?”

Alan blinked. Became unsure of what to do. Because none of what the professor had just said made any sense at all. He tried to laugh, though it came out dry, “Are you daft…? The only one to be fired will be you—”

“If you report me,” Professor Carter interrupted, “I’ll have no choice but to save my own skin. As a Slytherin,” he grinned, tongue curling over his teeth, “it’s what we do best. Given that you’re threatening me with my own job, I’ve no choice but to threaten you with your beloved Thomas. Report me to the Headmaster, and I’ll accuse the two of you with a student-teacher relationship.”

“But that’s not true—!”

“You know the funny thing about the human mind,” Ven—because the man no longer looked like anything that even remotely resembled a professor—outstretched his legs, standing up and appearing much taller than Alan ever remembered, circling around Alan and giving him a quick  touch on the forehead, “is that it’s hopelessly unstable. Everything is fragmented and therefore terribly fragile. In fact, human beings are quite stupid. They can create memories that never existed in the first place.”

Alan wasn’t entirely sure where Ven was going with his speech, but he didn’t want to know. Even still, he could’t bring himself to move. The professor was still circling around him like a shark, and the steady movement of it, the silent threat of it, kept Alan in place.

Fear was a hopelessly immobilizing thing.

“It’s true, I went into your head. But how could I,” he put his palm flat on his chest, “a concerned teacher not do what I can to help one of my prized students? If you even think to breathe a word to the headmaster, I’ll explain that Professor Sullivan has had quite the inappropriate relationship with you, and I merely used my skills as a Legilimens to confirm my suspicions and gather evidence. To help my darling student, of course.”

“But you have no proof! There’s never been anything between Professor Sullivan and I—”

Clicking his tongue, and wagging his finger in Alan’s face, Ven hummed, “You never were good at properly paying attention, Mr. Wilson. Did you not hear me the first time? When it really wants to, the mind can create memories. And you,” he motioned to Alan, pulling out a grey, milky vial from his robes, “have such intricate fantasies that I hardly had to do any work at all.”

The smile that curled his lips was like a snake slithering through grass, Alan’s heart pounding in his chest as he tried to process the professor’s words.

“Do you understand now? The Headmaster will have no choice but to get rid of Thomas—”

“Th-That’s not—“ Alan shook his head, “That can’t be—!”

“You’re about ten years too early to try and threaten me,” Ven barked, for a moment Alan thinking he might strike him, but instead the professor put the vial back in his robes, tucking it away for safekeeping. “Now,” he patted his robes down, “here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to go and confess to Thomas, the way you’ve always wanted to but were far too meek to do. You’re going to tell him all of those naughty fantasies that vile little head of yours has managed to come up with. And then, you’ll sit there and listen to him as he rejects you.”

That was just about the last thing Alan wanted. He’d come to terms with his feelings long ago—and he’d also decided long ago that he would never burden Thomas with the knowledge of it. Because Thomas didn’t deserve to have his time wasted by some no-name Hufflepuff.

He folded his hands in his lap, trying to steady his breathing which still hadn’t returned to normal since Professor Carter had first entered his head. “What do you get out of this?” he asked, refusing to look up.

“As I said,” Professor Carter lilted. “People should follow their desires. And right now, watching you squirm—that is my desire. Naughty brats should be punished. Especially a peeping one like you.”

“I wasn’t peeping! If you hadn’t forced Professor Sullivan to do something so unabashed in a classroom then I never would have seen—”

“Ah-ah-ah. Don’t begin to place blame when you’re wholly ignorant. Thomas asked me to do so. Now. You have twenty-four hours to confess to him. If you don’t, I’ll be sending this memory,” he patted at his robes, “to the headmaster. Do we have an agreement?”

Could that be true? Had Thomas truly asked for something like that? But Thomas had always been so composed, so upstanding, so proper…

Perhaps Alan didn’t know much about Thomas at all.

With a sinking feeling at the pit of his stomach, Alan nodded his head, silently agreeing to Ven’s terms.

He may as well would have made a deal with the devil.

…

Mulling over what to do didn’t exactly amount to much. Either Alan agreed to throw up his insides and place them at Thomas’s feet, left to forever be scrutinized by the man, or, he refuses to do so, and in doing so, cost Thomas his career, left to be hated by him forever.

And the latter was certainly worse.

Alan rolled over in bed, hugging his pillow to his chest.

He’d never needed Thomas to like him. He was nearly six years his senior—Alan had never hoped for that. The only thing he wanted—he just needed—he didn’t want Thomas to hate him, no matter what. And he certainly didn’t want to be the reason Thomas would never again be able to teach potions. Because it was clear to any and everyone—potions were the man’s passion. He’d always been skilled in the subject. Alan remembered once, towards the end of Thomas’s seventh year, when he received an award for being one of the youngest wizards to compete in a national competition.

He was simply brilliant.

There had to be a way around this. Professor Carter was too horrid of a man. Regardless of Alan’s own feelings, Professor Sullivan deserved much better than him.

He sat up. Maybe that was precisely the solution. Misunderstandings and blackmail only continue to happen when things continue to be misunderstood. When information is continuously and purposely occulted. If Alan went to Professor Sullivan and confessed everything that’d just transpired, then maybe the two of them could figure out how to report Professor Carter to the headmaster and have him banished for good.

Yes—! That was it!

Throwing his legs over the edge of the bed, he damn near stood up. But stopped. Gripped the edge of the mattress. Even if he explained everything to Professor Sullivan…to Thomas…then Alan would still have to admit his feelings. He wouldn’t be able to explain everything that was going on without that crucial detail.

He swallowed, knuckles ghosting from his grip on the bed. That was fine, he decided. This would be momentary embarrassment. Between his embarrassment, and Thomas’s passion, obviously Thomas was more important. Alan would be able to live with that. He’d been mortified plenty in his life. At the very least, this time he knew it would be serving a decent purpose.

With newfound resolve, he got out of bed and put on his shoes, making his way towards Professor Sullivan’s office.

Professor Carter may have been a cunning Slytherin, but Alan was a Hufflepuff; he wasn’t afraid to take the harder, more beaten-up path.

The staircases seemed all the more scrambled, today, as Alan tried to time himself, to keep his feet from slipping, to run through in his head what he planned to say to Thomas.

He didn’t have the slightest clue. He’d begin at the beginning, he supposed. And then work his way from there. Of course, there was no guarantee that Thomas would believe him. Perhaps he’d take Ven’s side. Because Thomas was virtuous like that—maybe he would side by his lover.

Alan hadn’t considered that. But despite it, even Thomas had to be aware of Ven’s nature. The accusation wasn’t so much of a stretch even if they were lovers. And more importantly, what Alan had to say was the truth. And Alan believed that the truth always had a way of shining through to people.

His heart sped up the closer and closer he got to Thomas’s office. For a moment, he thought to turn back. But he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to gather the courage to come all the way back here, so with a shaky breath, and an even shakier fist, Alan knocked politely on the door.

“Come in,” came the muffled voice from inside.

“Mr. Wilson,” Thomas acknowledged when Alan walked in, “to what do I owe this visit?”

There were papers scattered along the desk, and a few splotches of ink on what Alan could only assume to be drafts of new potions. A cat rested on the right side of the professor’s desk, its tail hanging over the edge, swinging lazily back and forth. It glared at Alan when he entered, but Alan had never quite been very good with animals to begin with.

Out of nervousness, he licked his lips before beginning to chew on the inside of his cheeks. He’d originally thought to stay standing, but his knees were buckling and threatening to give out. So he sat down on one of the chairs in front of Professor Sullivan’s desk instead.

“Um,” he swallowed, squeezing his hands in his lap, “well—y-you see…um…it’s about…um, Professor Carter—”

Professor Sullivan’s eyes narrowed, and Alan felt cold fear drip down his spine.

“I thought we agreed to keep this between ourselves, Mr. Wilson—”

“I-It’s not that—!” Alan was quick to say, practically lunging forward in his seat, “I just think—I don’t think you should see Professor Carter anymore! He’s not a very good boyfriend. I know this isn’t my place but he doesn’t even care if you lose your job. It’s my fault because I tried to threaten him but to get back at me he doesn’t even care if you’re the one who ends up suffering! If you love someone you shouldn’t do that! A-And if we don’t do something then Ven is going to report you to the Headmaster and you’ll be removed from Hogwarts and—!”

“Mr. Wilson,” Professor Sullivan held his hand up, giving a long, tired sigh. “From the beginning, please. Just how does Professor Carter intend to have me removed?”

Again, Alan swallowed. This was it. He’d no longer be able to hide it. “I…” he began, but then found himself unable to meet Thomas’s gaze, and so he lowered his head. “I’ve always had feelings for you, Professor. But please know I never intended to act on these feelings! I merely…” he closed his eyes, shaking his head to look at Thomas again. “I’m entirely at fault. Professor Carter is quite strict in his classes. I thought I could use what I saw the other day as leverage but it didn’t work. A-And Professor Carter is a Legilimens. Since I threatened him, he came into my mind and planted a fake memory and then somehow extracted it. The…” he paused, his face burning up with shame, “The memory he created…has to do with you and I. It’s…it’s inappropriate, and so Professor Carter said that if I didn’t…” he stopped, because the tears were prickling at his eyes. He never should have said anything from the start. Never should have approached Professor Carter, never should have gone back to Professor Sullivan’s room that day, never started liking Professor Sullivan in the first place.

“If you didn’t what, Mr. Wilson?” Professor Sullivan nudged gently.

Alan let the tears slip, “If I didn’t admit my feelings for you then he would reveal the memory to the Headmaster, and you’d be fired.” He gasped, choking on his silent sobs, “Please, Professor Sullivan, you have to know I never intended for any harm to come to you in any way! I only wanted,” he wiped his face, “I don’t even know what I wanted—I never should have tried in the first place—”

“Mr. Wilson,” Professor Sullivan folded his hands over his desk, a pillar of calm, “what I am about to say should quell your worries.”

Alan was quick to nod, sniffling and wiping at his eyes again. He knew Thomas would have a solution. That was just who he was. A brilliant, admirable wizard.

“Implanting fake memories is not possible. By that reasoning, extracting such a memory is all the more impossible.”

Alan’s eyes widened. Was that true? “But—”

The cat meowed, it’s open mouth stretching and stretching until the figure became human, Ven sitting with his long legs extended across the desk. “Boo, Thomas. You’re no fun at all.”

“Have you had quite enough tormenting our student—?”

“Not nearly enough,” Ven waved at him. “He couldn’t have cried for more than two minutes. I was quite enjoying his tear-stained face.”

“Ven,” Professor Sullivan chastised, but Ven didn’t stop.

Crossing his legs over the desk, Ven motioned at Alan, “I did you a favor. You know how he feels about you. Will you leave him without an answer to his pitiful confession?”

“I won’t lay my hands on a student,” Thomas barked at Ven. Then, turning to Alan, “I’m sure you understand—”

“No,” Alan shook his head, “I mean yes! Of course! I wouldn’t ever—that is, we wouldn’t—”

“Oh but you do,” Ven chirped, and for a moment, Alan thought the professor was talking to him, until he realized Ven was speaking directly to Thomas. “You’re as hot for student as he is hot for teacher.”

Alan stood up, “That’s not true! Don’t accuse Professor Sullivan of being as debauched as you!”

With that chilling grin, Ven hopped off the desk. “You know,” he trilled, “it’s quite the shame Thomas here is an Occlumens, or I’d show you myself. Your feeling are mutual.”

The sentence alone had a strange tightness bursting in Alan’s chest, Alan unable to sit still, “You—You just like playing with me…”

“You’re right about that,” Ven licked his lips, “but I like playing with Thomas more. Which is why, if you’ll excuse me,”

Alan wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting, but he certainly didn’t think Ven would lean in and kiss him—would remain kissing him, would draw his tongue out and—

A yelp parted Alan’s lips when he felt Ven’s tongue, or maybe it was the fact that Ven was ripped off by Professor Sullivan, the man’s expression curled in a snarl. Alan didn’t know what to do, save for try to slow down his racing heart, but he’d never seen Professor Sullivan look so angry before.

Anyone would be, Alan supposed, if you saw your lover kiss another person. The thought did nothing for his heart, however, only added a twisting feeling in his stomach, Alan licking his lips to try and apologize.

But before he could say anything, Professor Sullivan was hovering over him, that warm hand outstretching to cup Alan’s cheek. His thumb slid down, brushed over Alan’s bottom lip.

“He’s dirtied you.”

“I-I’m sorry—” Alan tried, thinking the Professor meant he to Ven, but was silenced with a softer, much more delicate kiss to his lips.

Ven sneered, “What happened to not laying your hands on your students?”

“That is as far as I’ll go,” Professor Sullivan affirmed, nodding at Alan, “I will show you out, Mr. Wilson.”

Alan’s head was reeling far too much to truly comprehend anything that anyone had said, but his body responded regardless, functioning on autopilot as Mr. Sullivan showed him out of the office.

He accompanied him all the way out into the hall, the Professor pulling the door behind him so that save for sliver of a crack, it was closed. “I meant what I said, Mr. Wilson. I will not lay my hands on a student.”

Alan nodded, hanging his head ever so slightly, “I understand, Mr. Sull—”

“However,” he interrupted, “I will look forward to the day of your graduation.”

Red blossomed over Alan’s cheeks, spread all the way up to claim his ears and most of his neck as well. “I-I’m—”

“Until then, Mr. Wilson.”

With that, Professor Sullivan slipped back into his office, leaving Alan in a heavenly daze. Was it possible that all of this, just now, had been a dream? That everything, from the very start, had been a dream? Because it hardly seemed real, the ghost of the touch left behind by Professor—by Thomas’s lips.

He was looking forward to graduation day…did that mean…?

No, it couldn’t, could it? But it had to. To what else could Thomas be referring? But then that meant that their feelings were mutual. And if that were true then come graduation day…

Wait.

What would happen to Professor Carter?

“Oy, Doll Face!”

Alan jolted, turning around. Professor Carter was strutting up to him, and Alan scowled, “I have a name. And my face doesn’t at all resemble a doll.”

“You say that like I’m aware of your name—”

“It’s Alan Wilson! I’ve been in your classes for two years now—!”

“Besides you’ve got a doll’s face. So pale. Is it the ‘face’ part that bothers you? Doll is shorter for me anyway—”

“It’s Alan. Or Mr. Wilson—”

“So Doll,” Ven continued, “I need to try something, if you don’t mind. Because this has been bothering me for a while.”

He said nothing more, took a bold step forward, and kissed him.

“P-Professor Carter—!” Alan brought a quick hand to his lips, wiping his mouth with his sleeve.

“What?” the man shrugged, “The one who said he’d wait until graduation was Thomas, not me.”

“But that’s not—it’s not decent—!”

He was pinned to the wall by that tall figure, Alan worried the professor might be able to hear his heart beating. “Have you not figured it out yet? I don’t care.” He made to kiss him, but Alan turned his head away. “T-The one I like is Professor Sullivan. This has nothing to do with you.”

Ven grabbed at Alan’s chin, turning it so that they were face to face. “I don’t care about that either.”

He managed to kiss him this time, keeping Alan in place with nothing but a simple touch of his fingers.

It wasn’t a very strong hold. Alan could have broken it, if he wanted.

If he wanted? Did that mean he didn’t want to push him off? Professor Carter’s lips were somewhat pleasant on his own, Alan would admit, but that didn’t mean that he wanted to kiss him. The only one he wanted to kiss was Professor Su—Thomas. And he’d stay true to that. Yes. He’d definitely push Professor Carter away and then tell him off.

He certainly would have, if Professor Carter hadn’t pulled away first.

“I don’t understand what Thomas sees in you. You’re rather…feeble. And naive.”

“At least I’m not vulgar or a cheater.”

“Oh?” Ven lilted, “Well I don’t spend my time spreading false accusations about others. Thomas and I are in an open relationship, you wannabe know-it-all. And the primary reason for that is you. But again, I don’t see the appeal, lanky thing like you.”

“I can’t help being la—“ Alan shook his head, “Did you say I-I’m the reason you’re—“ he motioned from Ven, to Professor Carter’s door, “But I’m…we’ve never even talked.”

Ven smirked, “And yet you fell for him anyway.”

How could he not, Alan thought. “But that’s different! Professor Sullivan is—”

Ven kissed him again, and Alan pushed him away, making a disgusted sound and wiping his mouth, “Would you stop that! I don’t know if this is all some large joke to you but I—if you think I won’t report you—!”

“Threats don’t suit you. And you’re not the kind to carry them out anyway. So stop getting your knickers in a twist. I’m just here trying to have some fun. As soon as I figure out what Thomas sees in you I’ll leave you alone.”

…

Ven did not, over the course of the remainder of the year, leave him alone. In fact, annoyed him all the more, what with his relentless teasing and side comments and calling him out in the middle of class and…the occasional….kiss every now and then.

Though it was perhaps much more often than just every now and then, because Alan had grown so terribly used to them. To the point where he no longer flinched, when Ven approached him. Rather, parted his lips slightly instead, so that it’d be easier for Ven, so that the professor could glide his tongue just over the top of Alan’s bottom lip.

It was embarrassing. And, though Alan could no longer say he disliked it, exactly, that didn’t stop him from feeling terrible about the whole thing. Because his feelings for Professor Sullivan were still very much there, and graduation was only just a few measly days away now, but not once had Professor Sullivan approached him in any sort of way.

So, Alan was under the impression that this was all still one large joke at his expense. Two Professors feeling bored and wanting to torment one of their students.

Graduation came and went, confirming Alan’s suspicions. That is, until the second evening after Alan had already returned home, when an owl flew in through the window to his messy room. The servants always offered to unpack his things for him, but Alan preferred doing it himself.

He thought nothing of the letter, thinking it one of his distant relatives, until he opened it up to see Professor Sullivan’s neat penmanship inside. Alan nearly screamed.

It was an invitation. An invitation to the Professor’s home—no—to Thomas’s home, to “properly congratulate you on your commencement.”

Alan’s heart pounded in his ears. What did that mean? Surely the joke had already ended, hadn’t it? Unless it’d never been a joke from the start. But then that would mean that Professor Sullivan—that Thomas—that he intended to—did he intend to…?

Frazzled, and rushing to the bathroom, Alan decided he should look his best, just in case. He left all of his clothes sprawled out across the room, wanting to focus on his hair, which was always bland and never quite curled in the way he wanted to. Even after a shower and styling it properly, it didn’t quite turn out how he’d been hoping.

But the clock was ticking, and Alan didn’t want to keep Thomas waiting. He briefly informed the servants that he was going out as he rushed down his staircase, reaching for the pot of floo by the fireplace. He spoke loudly; clearly, and with a toss of the floo, he was no longer staring into his own living room, but into Thomas’s instead.

And it all felt a bit like a dream.

Thomas was standing there, as if he’d been waiting for him, a glass of fire whiskey in his hand, not at all looking like a professor but rather more like a very adult man, and Alan began to feel his fingers start to itch.

“I’m glad you decided to come.”

Alan cleared his throat, realizing he was still in the fireplace, silently screaming at his feet to please move. “Yes. Um, thank you for inviting me.”

“We have a lot to discuss,” Thomas motioned towards the two chairs beside him. “Please, sit.”

“Thank you,” Alan nodded, feeling hopelessly meek. Thomas offered him some whiskey, but Alan declined.

“I suppose we should start with the obvious. Am I correct in assuming that you’re here because we both still have feelings for one another?”

Alan did all he could to not grind his teeth in an overtly obvious way. But he couldn’t well help it. It was either that or let Thomas see him dig his nails into the arm of this very expensive looking chair. “I-I…” he hesitated, looking at Thomas’s knees, rather than his face, “I’ve always liked you, but…I don’t know why you would—I mean I’m not really much of a catch, exactly…”

Thomas smiled, “You’ve always been so insecure. Even when your parents were still alive.”

At that, Alan’s head shot up, confusion blinking into his features, “My parents? Did you know them?”

The glass of fire whiskey clanked when Thomas set it down on the table, the professor bringing his hand up to his face to hide an embarrassed smile, “As I thought, you don’t remember.”

“Remember?” Alan leaned in, blood rushing in his ears, stopping entirely when Thomas took his hands into his own. “We’ve known each other for a long time, Alan Wilson. We used to play together while our parents discussed business affairs.”

Slow, rapid beats rose and then fell in Alan’s chest, like those unstable rides at town fairs. Was that true? From the look in Thomas’s eyes, Alan knew it had to be true, but that was part of what made it all so unbelievable to begin with. Alan did have vague memories of an older boy that would sometimes come to play, but it almost felt like the memory wasn’t quite there, like it turned into smoke the moment he reached out to grab it.

“I think I might, but…I’m sorry my memory has never been very good,” he lowered his head, heart racing when Thomas squeezed his hands.

“Whether you remember or not is fine. You don’t have to. What matters is what you think of this now. I’m a professor and yet I was unable to…are you not disgusted by it?”

“No, no of course not!” Alan squeezed Thomas back, “I’d never think ill of you! The fact that you even noticed someone like me is,” he laughed to himself, looking up to meet Thomas’s gaze. “Besides you’ve a lot more decency than Professor Carter.”

The grip on his hands became tighter, Thomas’s eyes darkened, “What did Carter do?”

“N-Nothing—!” Alan’s breath caught in his throat, “I think he was trying to make fun of me, mostly—”

“No,” Thomas growled. “That’s not likely.”

“What do you—”

“Listen to me, Alan. I need you to understand something. Ven and I have been in an open relationship since our 7th year at Hogwarts. If you wish it, I’m willing to become monogamous once again. With you.”

They’d been together since their 7th year? That was quite a long time, whether the relationship was open or not. And it meant that whatever Thomas and Ven had, it wasn’t something as flippant as Alan had originally thought. He licked his lips, biting the inside of his cheeks, “No, somehow…if the two of you split up because of me…that would feel wrong…”

Thomas’s eyes narrowed, and Alan thought he’d said the wrong thing, until he felt a chill go down his spine.

“I was hoping you’d say that.”

“Didn’t I tell you to wait in the dining room?” Thomas barked, keeping a tight hold on Alan’s hands. Ven walked around them, finishing off Thomas’s fire whiskey, “I got bored. You two were taking too long in here.”

“Ven. The dining room.”

“What’s it matter? He’s already seen me! Besides, its obvious this not-so-innocent Hufflepuff wants us both.”

“Um,” Alan tried, “I—”

“What do you say, Thomas?” Ven’s hand snaked around Alan’s neck, his lips brushing against Alan’s cheek, “I don’t mind if this little thing comes between us~”

“Let him go,” Alan threatened.

“No.”

“Alan,” Thomas snapped, causing Alan’s spine to straighten, his pulse quickening under Ven’s palm. “What is it you want?”

He didn’t know what he was supposed to say. He wanted Thomas, of course. Had always wanted Thomas. But lately Ven was also capable of making his heart race, and with the three of them all together in one room, how in the world was he ever supposed to admit that what he really wanted was to—

Ven squeezed Alan’s cheeks together, popping his jaw open and making to kiss him, only to spill some sort of elixir into Alan’s mouth. Thomas yelled, but Alan didn’t quite catch it, his head starting to spin.

He felt strange.

“I want you both,” he blurted, nausea settling in his stomach. “I want Thomas to kiss me. Ven always kisses me but Thomas never does.”

Thomas’s eyes were so black that it sent shivers down Alan’s spine, and yet in that moment he wasn’t the least bit afraid.

“Very good, Doll,” Ven praised, giving his cheek a chaste kiss. “What else do you want Thomas to do?”

A rush of adrenaline raced through Alan’s veins, the hair on his arms raising in excitement. Ven hadn’t ever praised him before. Perhaps it was only the potion making him feel this way, but telling the truth felt…good.

“I want him to hold me!” Alan gasped almost desperately, nails curling into Thomas’s palms, “Ever since my fourth year I’ve always wanted him to hold me—!”

“Truth serum?” Thomas interrupted. “Do you always feel the need to stoop to such low measures—?”

“I find low measures speed things along,” Ven smirked, Alan not having to look at him to know that his cheshire smile was curling his lips upwards.

Alan’s head pounded. Everything sounded muddled and yet hopelessly clear at the same time. He hoped Ven wouldn’t ask him any more questions and yet he hoped he did, wanting to be praised again, to be kissed on the cheek again.

Thomas noticeably swallowed, bringing a hand to Alan’s cheek, “Forgive me, but I’ll ask again.”

Alan nodded, wanting to tell Thomas that he need not pay it any mind.

“What is it you want?”

“Anything you’re willing to give. Either one of you.”

“Then,” Thomas kissed him, tugging ever so slightly with his teeth, “you aren’t allowed to regret what comes next.”

Ven laughed, finally releasing Alan’s neck as Thomas took him, carrying Alan bridal-style.

“You’ve done it now, Doll. There’s no stopping him when he gets like this~”

They apparated into what Alan could only guess was Thomas’s bedroom, which only made his head spin all the more, Alan wondering why they couldn’t have just walked instead.

He was laid gently onto the bed, shifting only when Ven slid his thighs beneath Alan’s head, to create a sort of pillow. Heat rose to Alan’s cheeks. “What’s wrong, Doll?”

Alan made to say nothing, but his mouth opened on its own, “I’m embarrassed.”

Thomas had just made to get on the bed, leaning over Alan to give him a kiss on the lips.

“Why are you embarrassed?” Ven pressed, hand running through Alan’s hair.

“Because I’ve never done this before,” Alan whimpered, biting back the urge to say more.

Thomas smirked at that, lips dragging down Alan’s neck, “First time with two men?”

“First time ever,” Alan corrected, before Thomas had even finished his sentence. He wished he would have been able to stay quiet, to not give so much away, because Thomas stopped the moment the words left Alan’s mouth.

“I’m sorry I’m not experienced,” he blurted. “I’ll do my best—!”

“Oh, Thomas,” above him, Ven smirked, still stroking his hair, “doesn’t this make it all the more delicious?”

“No,” Thomas pulled away, and Alan’s heart sunk. “We should do things more slowly. Properly.”

Alan sat up, panic making his heart race, “Um! I-I know I’m not—but I really will try—!”

“Don’t worry about him,” Ven’s arm circled his waist, pulling Alan towards him. “If that’s what he wants then I’ll break you in. How does that sound?”

“Um—”

“You’ll do nothing of the kind,” Thomas barked, reaching for Alan. “He’s never done this before—”

“Alan,” Ven’s teeth brushed over the shell of his ear, “tell Thomas what you want him to do.”

“I want him to kiss me like he was before. And to not stop. I want him to—”

“I understand,” Thomas huffed, running a hand through his hair, “but that doesn’t change the fact that—”

“Oh Thomas,” Ven sighed, gripping Alan’s chin and forcing him to face Thomas, “you’re gonna make the poor thing cry.”

Thomas kissed him. Took him from Ven and held him, warm tongue brushing over lips and curling into Alan’s mouth, Alan unable to help the moans that bled into Thomas’s mouth.

“You’re quite noisy,” Thomas stated, but it didn’t sound very much like a complaint, so Alan made no effort to keep quiet.

“Do keep that up,” Ven encouraged, starting for Alan’s pants, “he likes them loud.”

“I’ve no preference,” Thomas tried, but Ven refuted the fact. Not that Alan cared either way, at least, not when he was between the two men he’d been wanting most.

Even though he was kissing Thomas, it was difficult not to notice Ven, particularly so when the man’s hand slid down Alan’s pants, warm ripples flushing Alan’s skin at the of feel Ven’s hands on him, a full on gasp nearly making him choke when Ven finally grabbed his cock.

“Be gentle,” Thomas warmed through gritted teeth.

“I’m nothing but,” Ven countered, beginning to stroke Alan, peppering teeth-filled kisses onto the back of Alan’s neck.

Alan’s eyes were closed, but even if they were open he knew he’d be equally as dizzy. Naturally he’d taken care of himself before, but it felt so different having another person’s hands on him—so much better, and somehow he found himself wishing Thomas would touch him like that too.

He deepened their kiss, silently asking for the same from Thomas. The professor grinned into his lips, “What is it?”

“Touch me,” Alan blurted, the potion still very much in effect and entirely indifferent to Alan’s embarrassment.

Thomas looked from Alan to Ven, a single brow raised, before motioning at Ven to move. They swapped positions easily, Ven pulling Alan to his chest, so that he was in between Ven’s legs, back pressed against Ven’s chest, Alan able to feel how hard Ven already was against his lower back. In front of him, Thomas lowered himself, pulling at Alan’s pants, Alan shivering when his skin felt the sudden cold, heating up all over again when Thomas’s hands touched the skin of his legs.

The shivers weren’t from the cold, anymore. He could feel Ven biting along his neck some more, the demonic man nibbling at him every few moments, Alan knowing he would certainly bruise come tomorrow. But he hoped he would. He wanted those bruises. Wanted proof of any and everything Thomas and Ven were about to do to him.

At one point Ven had grabbed him by the chin—Thomas still massaging his legs with those large hands—so Alan didn’t see the way Thomas crept forward, until his mouth was already pressed against Alan’s boxers. He whined into Ven’s mouth.

“Oh,” Ven smirked. “Did you want to watch?”

Alan wasn’t given time to reply, Ven forcing his head down, so that he could watch Thomas start to peel his boxers away. Ven’s hands snaked across Alan’s chest, stopping only to tease his nipples, Alan’s dick twitching in reaction.

That felt good. But not nearly as good as watching Thomas open his mouth, seeing his tongue slide out and lick the tip of Alan’s already crying cock. He moaned, legs twitching, but Thomas didn’t allow it, held Alan’s thighs in place when he went in again, this time taking Alan into his mouth.

“He likes that, Thomas,” Ven chuckled, “his back arched right into you.”

Alan wasn’t sure if that was or wasn’t true, but one thing he knew for certain was that he was melting into Thomas’s mouth. Hot, and wet, and tight, Thomas took all of him, Alan gasping and bucking his hips though he didn’t quite mean to, feeling the edge of Thomas’s throat and wanting to feel it again. And when Thomas began to move, to bob his head up and down, to suck all around him, Alan couldn’t help but toss his head back, moaning into Ven’s shoulder.

“Oh my,” Ven purred, trailing Alan’s neck with a cold finger, “he really likes that.”

Thomas glared up at both of them, which only caused Alan to shiver, but Thomas didn’t stop, continued to work Alan’s length until his legs were trembling to the point of collapse, Ven keeping them spread so that he had no means of escape. “Th-Thomas,” he begged, though he wasn’t quite sure what he was begging for, his arms curled up into his chest, fists closed with white knuckles.

Ven was pinching his nipples again, though Alan still felt hands on his thighs, and somewhere in his muddled brain he realized they had to have been Thomas’s, but hardly anything registered aside from the fact that he was being touched in every which way, a very specific heat starting at the pit of his stomach and rising and rising, getting tighter and tighter and tighter until his thighs tensed up so much Alan could no longer stand it.

“Oh Thomas,” he whined, “Thomas I’m—”

It was Ven who grabbed Thomas by the hair, yanked him away and brought Alan’s spinning pleasure to a terrible screeching halt.

“No—” Alan scratched at Ven’s arm. “N-No, please—”

“Patience, Doll,” Ven kissed his cheek. “Good things to those who wait.”

“You could’ve let him have at least that,” Thomas smirked, wiping his mouth with his arm, Alan entirely entranced by the motion.

“Let’s get to the main attraction now, shall we?” Ven licked his ear, muttering an incantation that Alan didn’t quite catch. Without warning, he was facing the ceiling, back on the bed and Ven hovering over him. “This is my favorite spell,” he licked his lips, fingers sliding down between Alan’s thighs, and pressing a finger in.

Alan gasped, back arching up off the bed, hands shooting down to grab at Ven’s wrists. That was strange. Was it supposed to go in that easily?

“Thomas,” Ven called, “look at how wet he is.” He pulled his finger out, holding it just beneath Thomas’s lips. To Alan’s suprise—horror?—delight, Thomas licked Ven’s finger, Alan shivering upon watching. “That’s dirty…” he tried, but Thomas refuted the fact, bringing his hand over to brush Alan’s hair back. “Relax while Ven stretches you. Do you want to taste yourself?”

He nodded eagerly, because Ven had just put the finger back in, and although it wasn’t exactly painful, it was hopelessly embarrassing, and just ever so slightly uncomfortable.

Having Thomas kiss him made all of the embarrassment go away. Especially so when Thomas slipped his tongue in, and Alan was allowed to taste himself, the way Thomas had promised. Alan wasn’t quite sure what he’d been expecting it to taste like, but somehow it wasn’t nearly as unpleasant as he originally thought it might—

He squealed, Ven having curled his fingers inside him, Thomas grabbing his chin and forcing him in place, not letting him move though his legs kicked beneath him.

“Jittery little thing,” Ven breathed, holding Alan’s stomach down as he continued with his ministrations. “Don’t you think he’s just about ready?”  Thomas said, somehow managing to not pull his lips from Alan’s.

“I’d say so,” Ven smiled, unzipping his pants. The sound alone made Alan tense. Thomas grabbed for Alan, “What do you think you’re doing?”

Ven frowned, “I took the trouble of preparing him. I think I should be given the first taste.” He grabbed for Alan as he said so, but a blast came, knocking Ven to the opposite side of the room. Slowly, Alan turned to look at Thomas, horror and amazement making his jaw drop.

He’d never seen wandless magic in person before.

“I wish we could have done this more slowly,” Thomas apologized, “but that won’t hold him for long. And I’m afraid I’m already quite distracted.”

Before Alan could come up with any sort of sorry reply, Thomas was hovering over him, kissing him, their clothes vanishing instantly, Alan only briefly wondering where they might have disappeared to, not quite caring the moment he felt Thomas’s heat against his stomach.

“Th-Thomas—“

Hand on Alan’s cheek, Thomas kissed the top of his head, “Try to take a deep breath.”

Alan did as he was told, looking up at Thomas expectantly, “N-Now what?”

“Take another one.”

“And then?”

“One more.”

Alan nodded to show he understood, preparing for his second large breath. Only, when he did, Thomas pushed in, Alan’s breath catching in his throat, his arms shooting up to grab at any piece of Thomas that he could. “Thomas—!”

“Does it hurt?”

“N-No but—”

“Did you not hear me?” Thomas smirked, pressing their chests together and placing a chaste kiss on Alan’s cheek. “I said to take a deep breath.”

Alan didn’t know how deep breaths were supposed to be possible when Thomas was as big as he was. When Thomas was as thick as he was. When Thomas was as hot as he was. How was he supposed to ever breathe again, knowing that this was what it felt like to finally be connected with the man that he’d loved for so long—

His thoughts were cut, the moment Thomas began to move. Because Alan could feel everything—every ridge and bump of Thomas’s length, could feel the low groan rumbling slowly in Thomas’s chest, could feel the depravity of his own hips, wriggling ever so slightly to match Thomas’s movements.

“If we’re all quite done with this sap fest—”

The bed shifted beneath what Alan could only assume was Ven’s weight, Thomas growling at him to stay away but Ven not listening, from the way the weight shifted closer and closer towards Alan.

“You’re not the only one who wants to have some fun.”

“You’ll break him—” Thomas snapped, arms tensing above Alan’s head, still buried deep inside him.

“He won’t break—”

“What if he—”

“There’s a spell for that—”

“And if there isn’t?”

“You’re the Potion’s Master,” came Ven’s drawl of a laugh. “I’m sure you’ll be able to come up with something.”

Alan didn’t know what they were talking about. But he knew that he hated when those two left him out of their conversations. All it did was remind him of how much more history they had. How much more history they would always have.

“Whatever it is…” he spoke up, clearing his throat, “I’m fine with it…”

“See?” Ven inched closer, “He’s fine with it—”

“Alan, you don’t—”

“It’s okay,” Alan reached up, touching Thomas’s face. “I trust you. Both of you.”

Ven chuckled, with a wave of his hand causing both Alan and Thomas to levitate, while he settled himself on the bed, “I wouldn’t trust me if I were you~”

They settled back down, Alan’s back now against Ven’s chest instead of the bed, Thomas still on top of him, still inside of him, Alan entirely unsure of what it was he was supposed to do.

“Alan,” Thomas barked, Alan’s head snapping to attention.

“Yes?”

“This will hurt—”

“Only a little,” Ven licked the shell of Alan’s ear. “Honestly Thomas you’re so dramatic.”

“W-What are you gonna do—?”

“Trust me, Doll. It’ll be much better if I just show you instead,” as he said so, he rubbed against Alan’s ass, and Alan came into terrible realization.

“No that’s—! You won’t fit!”

Ven chuckled, “I’m humbled by the compliment—”

“No, Ven, really—Thomas barely—”

Ven didn’t listen, muttered something beneath his breath and then pushed on through, Alan feeling as though his stomach was in his throat.

He felt…full.

How would they ever be able to move like this?

They were, in fact, able to move, Thomas sliding out and then pushing back in, Ven sliding out as Thomas pushed, the two alternating their movements so that Alan was never at any point empty. And with every minor movement Alan thought his body might tear, thought it might sink into ultimate pleasure, thought he might break, thought he’d slip into unknowable bliss. Ven’s pants were in his ear, heavy and hot, sending trickles down his spine because it tickled more than anything else, and Thomas’s groans were up above him, arms strained from movement and hips jutting in beautiful rhythm.

The same heat that had started when Thomas was sucking him off swirled in him again, twisting and twirling and tightening in the pit of his stomach.

He wasn’t sure if it was Ven, or Thomas, or both, but every so often they would hit something that made Alan see stars, and he couldn’t get enough of it.

Especially so when Ven snaked his hands down his torso, to grasp at Alan’s own heat and start jacking him off.

The heat in him was rising. With every push and pull of Thomas and Ven’s bodies, every breath they gave, Thomas’s groans and Ven’s pants, both of their hands on his body, their sweat all starting to mix together, to become one, the slippery wetness of it all, the scent of the room—

Alan couldn’t take it anymore.

He saw white. The pleasure was inundating, and the whine that broke his lips was deafening, Alan’s legs tightening and then trembling with the rush of his orgasm.

“Fuck Doll—”

“Don’t squeeze that much—”

They were requests Alan was deaf to, because he couldn’t stop shaking, could feel himself squeezing, didn’t want to stop, couldn’t, and when another burst of heat filled his stomach Alan had at least enough sense to realize that it hadn’t come from him alone.

Somehow or another, they all collapsed together. This time with Thomas hugging him from behind, Alan staring at Ven who was lying directly across from them.

Alan’s legs felt like lead.

“You know,” Ven sighed, resting his head against his arm. “I think I like your hair better that way.”

“Me or him?” Thomas was first to say.

Ven chuckled, “I wonder that myself.”

“Ven?” Alan tried, reaching out for him.

“What is it?”

“Will you kiss me?”

Ven raised a brow, “The truth serum should have cleared up by now.”

Alan swallowed, blushing all the way up to his ears, “Is that a no?”

Ven leaned in, but Thomas captured Alan’s cheek, bringing him in for a kiss before Ven could have a say.

“You’re disgustingly competitive.”

“Must be the Slytherin in me.”

“Could be,” Ven grinned. “But I believe Alan asked me. Therefore, that kiss belongs to me.”

Thomas grabbed for Ven, kissing him full on the lips, “Consider it yours, then.”

Ven shot Alan a wicked grin, giving him a quick peck, “Prepare yourself, Hufflepuff. You’re in for a long night.”

#writing #writing commissions

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

The Mistakes We Made - Chapter Three

Summary:When her high school girlfriend comes back to town after two years with a baby and a terrible story she won’t tell, the Librarian has to deal with the feelings she had worked so hard to keep at bay.

notes: Uhhh so the notes I wrote are kinda importanta, but they’re too long, so if you really want to read them you can read it at ao3 lol. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

Read it on ao3: (chpt1) (chpt2) (chpt3)

The bell rang loudly, interrupting Mrs. Kavindi’s speech about neoclassicist poetry. The woman tried to keep her students’ attention, but it was no use, as the teens were already putting their stuff away in their backpacks. Only a pair of grey eyes followed her hand as she wrote on the board, rapidly taking note of everything. Eventually, she sighed and let her hand drop to her side.

“Alright, everyone. You’re free to go.”

There were loud noises of chairs dragging on the floor and the chatter of the students as they hurriedly left the Literature classroom, eager to begin their weekend. The girl, however, took her time putting her pen in her pencil case, and her pencil case in her backpack. She checked her notes one more time, certifying herself that she had written in legible handwriting before she was out of the classroom and couldn’t ask the teacher any more questions.

She got up from the chair and put her backpack on her back, walking up to the teacher who had sat down on the table and was watching the students leave. Mrs. Kavindi raised her eyes when she realized the girl had gotten closer, and gave her a simile.

“Can we expect you this evening, Maven?”

The girl nodded. “I still have some topics to study for next month’s finals, but I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Kavindi’s smile widened as she watched her favorite student leave. The girl was a bit of an outcast, for sure, but by her experience, all the best people were.

_#_#_#_

Johanna bit back a groan when the boy came closer. His smug grin was infuriating, and it didn’t help matters when he leaned on his shoulder against the locker next to her.

“I don’t want to talk to you, Torrin.” She said as she put her math notebook back in its place. His blue hair fell over his face when he laughed.

“Why not?”

Johanna closed her locker’s door with more strength than necessary. “Because you’re a jerk.”

“Is this about about Dick? Is this why you’re angry?” He said the words in a mocking voice, making Johanna wonder what would be the penalty if she got caught burying a corpse. Maybe Maven would be up for it too and they wouldn’t get caught. It sounded like a good plan.

“What happened between me and your friend is our business. Not yours.” Johanna sighed. She was waiting for Torrin to answer when she sighted a spot of black coming towards her. Her mouth opened into a smile, her eyes moving from his strong face to beatiful, wise eyes, coming closer and closer, with a smile answering her own.

When Torrin realized he had lost Johanna’s attention, it was too late. Maven was already behind him, pulling his head back by grabbing a handful of his hair. He gasped at the feeling, though she hadn’t grasped quite hard enough to make him feel any pain.

“I believe you are unwanted here, Aven.” She stated coldly. She let his hair go, but not without taking a few strands with her. The boy turned to her, wide eyed with fright but feigning anger.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“Remember what you called my mother last month, when you and your gang threw eggs at our house?” She ignored him as she tied one of the strands around the others, making a little bundle. “You called her a witch. And you weren’t wrong.”

She put the bundle on her jacket pocket and looked at him in the eyes. “So tell me, Aven. What kind of thing do you think a witch can do with a few pieces of your ridiculous blue hair?”

Torrin cursed under his breath and left, taking long strides and making sure to bump on Maven’s shoulder hard enough to hurt. But the raven haired girl didn’t care. All she could focus on was her friend trying and failing to contain her fit of giggles.

“Your mother wouldn’t actually curse him, right?” Johanna asked once she had gotten a hold of her laughter.

“Well, she could. But she won’t because he’s just a stupid teen. It would be a waste of spell ingredients.” Maven looked at ground. She wasn’t ashamed of her mother’s religion, nor was she that she too had chosen to follow Wicca, but Johanna’s parents were extremely Christian and she didn’t like to see the involuntary judgement in Johanna’s eyes whenever she talked about her faith.

“Are you ready to go?” Maven asked right after. Johanna had already put everything she would need for the weekend in her backpack and it seemed useless to just stand there looking at each other.

“Oh. Yes, I am. There’s something I need to talk to you about.”

She sounded sad, Maven realized. That was unusual. Her Anna was always so full of happiness that whenever her mood changed it was easy to notice, at least for her.

They were silent as they finished crossing the school’s corridor and its front door. When they were finally outside, with the early autumn wind messing with their hair and the leaves on the trees by the sidewalk, she finally spoke.

“I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you about this when you asked at lunch. I didn’t feel like badmouthing someone then. But after that, I’ve no problem whatsoever with doing it.”

Oh, this is going to be good ,she thought but instead said “Torrin Aven is never good knews. Truly, only he is able to get you this upset.”

“You aren’t going to believe this, Maven! So, I had scheduled to help Richard study, correct?”

“I still don’t know why you accepted that, but yes, correct.”

“It turns out he didn’t want a hand with geometry! He was trying to trick me into going on a date with him!” She threw her hands up in frustration. “Who does that?!”

Maven snorted. “Stupid, obnoxious people, that’s who.”

Johanna sighed deeply, and looked both ways before both of them crossed the street to her block. “Honestly, I’ve never met one dateable boy. I wonder it I’m the problem, or if they are.”

She stopped in front of her house, turning to look at Maven before they bid goodbye. “You know, maybe I’m meant to be alone”, she said sadly. Maven’s eyes widened, and her mouth was slightly open with confusion.

“That’s not true!” The girl protested. “I mean, if you don’t want to be with anyone, that’s okay, but if you want a relationship, I doubt that you’ll stay much longer without one, Anna.”

“What makes you think so?”

“You’re a naturally loving person, for one. You’ve always been able to give your heart completely to the people you love.” She shrugged. “And you’re smart. And beautiful. And extremely kind. Anyone would be happy to have you. Now you just need to find someone who you think deserves you.”

Her long brown hair cascaded down her shoulder when she cocked her head. “You’re just saying this to make me feel better about being picky with boys.” She laughed nervously.

Maven sighed and blushed. Trying to flirt with a girl who grew up in a conservative household was a challenge indeed. But she had been doing it for five years and she wasn’t about to give up on her clueless Anna now. “I’m really not, though.”

She was rewarded with a hug and a peck on the cheek. “Thanks, Maven. You’re the best friend I could wish for.” She drew back and began heading for the door. “Same time same place?” Johanna asked as she looked for the keys in her backpack.

“Yup.”

With a smile, Johanna entered her house and closed the door again. A ghost of a smile passed through Maven’s lips. Though she had been wanting to be something more to Johanna ever since they were thirteen, being her best friend was already enough. It was more than an “antisocial creep”, as she was called in school, like her deserved. Johanna could be friends with anyone. With the jocks, the nerds, the popular people, the drama kids and the band kids. But she chose to stick with the graveyard keeper’s daughter, and she couldn’t be more grateful.

And yet, she was too selfish to stop wanting more.

_#_#_#_

“Oh, it seems someone else needs to go to her bedroom too.” Johanna said sweetly as she picked her baby up again. “Could you take the stroller to our room? I’ll try to calm her down a bit.”

“Oh, sure.” Maven quickly put her cup on the sink counter and went for the stroller, taking it through the narrow corridor beside the staircase that led to her mother’s old bedroom. She pushed on the door with her back, placing the stroller between the bed and the window.

She hoped Hilda didn’t mind having a cemetery for a view.

Johanna came in too not a moment later, singing her baby a lullaby that Maven was almost sure she recognized from somewhere, though she had no idea where. Her mother had never sung her lullabies, always going for stories to calm her down instead.

“Is she going to sleep in the stroller?”

Johanna sighed. “I don’t think I have another option. I left in a hurry, so I didn’t have time to disassemble her crib and bring it along.”

Maven bit her lip. What could have happened that made them practically run out of there? She swore that if in the end it turned out Aven had threatened them physically, there would be very few places that man would be able to hide in. She was already hated in town for being an outcast, so why not add murder to the list?

“Well, I think I have a smaller comforter stored somewhere. Do you want it?” She asked, wanting to help even if a little with their situation.

“No, I brought her blanket, but thank you.” Johanna gave her a really tired smile. “Do you have any children’s books, though? I didn’t bring hers, and she really likes the colours.”

Maven nodded. “I’ll be back in a second.”

_#_#_#_

It had been a fairly calm meeting, Maven mused as she put her sweater back on. The book club was rarely this way. Just in the last few months, she had already gotten into arguments about A Midsummer Night’s Dream and The Iliad, but it seemed like everyone had similar opinions this time, or at least no one had wanted to defend Alice when the majority of the participants had accused her of being a spoiled little girl who didn’t respect Wonderland’s traditions, just judging them all as “madness”.

She had been so concentrated on checking that everything she had brought was still in her simple brown leather purse that she barely realized that she was being spoken to. She raised her head and saw that the librarian, Mr. Kavindi, was talking to her.

“I’m sorry, sir, what was that?” She asked politely and he chuckled.

“I asked what are your plans for after school, little one.” Mr. Kavindi was a sweet man, with graying red hair and round glasses. He was wearing a blue sweater that was way too big for him. All his sweaters were like that, and she supposed it was because his wife knitted all of them for him.

“Oh yes, dear. I wanted to talk to you about this.” Said wife, Mrs. Kavindi, walked up to them and put her hand on his shoulder. Her wild dark brown hair framed her face, and combined with her green coat it made her look like a forest spirit. “Go on, Maven. I think he may be able to help.”

Maven looked from her teacher to the librarian. She really didn’t know what he could possibly do for her. The only help she needed was financial, and it was highly unlikely that a librarian had a lot of money to spare.

“I would like to study English, and then major in Library Science.” She said simply.

His eyes lit up and his usually kind face showed even more happiness. “Oh, so you want to steal my job, young lady?”

Maven put the purse’s strap on her shoulder and got up from the armchair she usually sat on, one with dark wood and magenta cushioning. She looked around the room that they used for their weekly meetings, one of the most secluded areas of the library, breathing in the calming smell of old parchment and ink that emanated from the hundreds of books piled upon shelves on the walls. Yes. Yes, she wanted to.

“You needn’t worry, sir. My mother doesn’t have enough money to pay for my college, and I really don’t think it would be wise to get in debt.” She’d probably just stay in Trollberg and learn her mother’s job. She was already quite familiar with it, and it wasn’t as if there was a queue of people wanting to be the knew cemetery keeper. In fact, she didn’t think there was a single soul that wanted it.

Mr. Kavindi frowned and seemed to deflate. His wife, on the other hand, kept pressing on. “And where would you study, if you had the money?”

She didn’t know why her teacher was asking this - she already knew. Maven had talked to her about her plans and why they wouldn’t work. But her teacher was a smart and helpful woman. It wouldn’t hurt to say again.

“In Ericsonberg University. It’s not a very long drive to make every day, or I could go by train and it would be even faster. Also, my best friend has already sent in her application and is probably going to study there.” Trollberg was a small town. It had very few options of higher education, and only a few courses were offered, most of them related to the forest and agriculture. Everyone else had to move away or choose a college in a nearby city.

“That is wonderful!” Mr. Kavindi chirped, looking like himself again. “I can help, then. I have a very close relationship with the dean!”

Maven made herself stand up straighter and looked at him with more attention. “Really?”

“Yes! We studied English in Oslo together! Why, Erica always told me you were such a great student, I’m sure I can work something out with him.”

Maven wasn’t the sentimental type, she really was not. But in that moment she felt such gratitude that a few tears nearly leaked from her eyes. Nearly.

“Would you do that?” She asked, just to be certain, just to check. It wasn’t offer something this good happened to her.

The librarian’s eyes softened, and he and his wife leaned their heads against one another’s. It was weird, to see those two people so similar and so in love. It was like they had been made for one another. It was cute. “Of course, little one. It isn’t often that we get a bright and curious mind like yours in a small town like this one. It would be a shame not to nurture it.”

Maven inhaled deeply with emotion. “Is there anything I can do to thank you?”

Mrs. Kavindi let go of her husband put both hands upon Maven’s shoulders. “You are already hard working and focused. I know we needn’t ask you that. But you’re lonely. So in return, I ask you to not get even more so. Keep that friend of yours around. Don’t let the rhythm of college pull you two apart, okay?”

She had to blink back a few tears at that. “Thank you. So much.”

Husband and wife shared a look, and before she knew, Maven was engulfed in a bone crushing hug. “We’re glad to be of help, young lady.” He said when he pulled back. “I’ll let you know when I hear back from the dean.”

“Now run along.” Her teacher said. “You have finals to study for.”

Maven smiled to them and headed to the door. She had something else to do, actually.

_#_#_#_

It turned out that her mother had kept all her favorite books from when she was a kid in a single box in their cramped little attic. After scaring a spider into moving away from the box, Maven dug in and grabbed the three first books she saw, walking away quickly and promising to come back soon with cleaning apparel.

The spiders she could live with, but a bunch of perfectly good books gathering dust crossed a line.

When she came back down, Hilda wasn’t crying anymore, but was clearly agitated in her mother’s arms. She approached Johanna very quietly. She didn’t know much about babies, so she wasn’t really sure if any noise could make matters worse or not. Even though Johanna’s eyes were focused on Hilda’s forehead, her gaze was so glassy that Maven doubted that she was actually seeing anything.

“Hey, I found them.” She placed the book by Johanna’s side on the bed. She desperately wanted to ask if she was okay, but she didn’t think she’d get an honest answer.

Johanna’s gaze cleared and she looked at the items before her. “Oh. Thank you, Maven.”

“Not for that.”

It felt like silence stretched for a long time after that, but realistically Maven knew it had only been a few seconds.

“So. I, uh, I’ll just read one of them for her and then sleep myself. Can I do anything for you?”

“No, it’s okay.” Maven rubbed at her eyes. Just looking at Johanna was making her tired. “Just get some rest. You look like a zombie.”

Johanna lifted her eyebrows. “Well, aren’t you a flatterer?” She asked mockingly.

“I speak only truths.” She said as she headed to the door. You look beautiful to me anyway. That truth she didn’t tell.

Johanna shook her head and got up from the edge of the bed. Maven’s heart felt entirely too tight as she watched from the doorway Johanna kiss her child goodnight before gently lowering her down to the stroller and tucking the blanket around her. The woman really had “mother” written all over her. The image of the two of them, so perfect and loving even through pain and exhaustion, was too much to bear, and Maven had to avert her eyes.

When Johanna turned to get one of the books to read to her baby, Maven was already at the bottom of the staircase.

_#_#_#_

Johanna fidgeted nervously with the sleeves of her jacket as she looked out of one of the Poet’s Retreat windows. Ever since she had arrived home that afternoon, she’d felt as if butterflies had taken flight in her belly. She didn’t think she’d ever been so nervous.

She had been stalling that realization for as long as she could, pushing the thought away whenever it popped in her mind, but honestly, she’d be a fool to ignore Maven’s feelings towards her after she’d all but declared her love, and even a bigger one if she denied her own feelings any longer when she had felt like she was melting inside when she had kissed her friend’s cheek.

She’d had a most unproductive afternoon, after that. She’d had been dealing with the thought of liking girls for some time now, so guilt wasn’t really a problem, especially since she wasn’t as religious as her parents, anyway. But the worry of not being able to share that part of herself with the people that had raised her had kept her thoughts away from her studies.

At least she knew there was a name for what she felt, for liking boys and girls. It kept at bay the feeling of being an alien in a small minded town. It was comforting. But it still didn’t hold back the shock that was admitting that she was in love with her best friend, regardless of gender.

When the clock in the wall near the counter marked five in the afternoon and Maven still hadn’t arrived, Johanna began thinking something was off, which didn’t help her matters when she was already trembling with nervousness. She was always so punctual, arriving right after her book club ending, precisely at five to five. And she wouldn’t have just forgotten it either. They’d had this appointment ever since they first went to the Poet’s Retreat together: 5 p.m. every Tuesday and Friday. Even if they didn’t have the money or didn’t feel like ordering anything, they’d go in and talk. About their days, their worries, their parents, their studies, or even about dumb things they saw in the internet. They never missed it unless there was something very important they needed to do, or if one of them was sick, in which case they’d visit each other in their houses in the time they were supposed to be there. It was their tradition, their thing. Maven wouldn’t miss their eight year old tradition unless something had happened.

Johanna was just going to call her when the bell that hung above the cafe’s door jingled and she turned to see who was it, relieved as she watched Maven come in. She looked radiant with happiness, and she couldn’t wait to find out what got her like this.

Without breaking eye contact with Johanna, Maven walked closer with a shy smile, while her friend grinned at her. She pulled her usual chair back and sat down, chewing on her bottom lip before she whispered.

“You won’t believe what happened!”

“What did?” Johanna asked as she tried her best not to get distracted by said lip.

“Mr. Kavindi says he knows Ericsonberg English College’s dean. He will try to get me in!”

Johanna’s jaw dropped. For more than an year now, she’d been worrying about what would happen to Maven when High School was over, knowing very well her widow mother couldn’t really afford an expensive college like those of the cities nearby, nor could she pay for a place for Maven to live at in the further away cities that offered cheaper education. So this was practically a blessing that fell down from the skies.

“Are you serious? How?”

“I still don’t know exactly.” Maven said, trying to get the buttons of her coat undone. “Most likely they’ll give me some tough exam or something. But I’ll make it.” She got all of them out of their holes and lifted her head to look at her friend. “I have to.”

Johanna reached out and grabbed her hand “Yes, you will. And if you need help, you can count on me.” She said, squeezing it slightly.

Maven smiled and intertwined their fingers upon the table, making Johanna’s heart skip a few beats. She swore that that coy smile would kill her one day. “Thank you, Anna. I feel like coffee”, she said suddenly. “Will you join me?”

She didn’t quite think that coffee was the best option for her already on edge nerves, but it was a special occasion. It called for celebratory coffee.

“Sure.”

Maven got up, then, and told their order to the barista who already knew them by name. She came back a few minutes later, handing her a cup with a lot of cream.

“I forgot to give you the money!” She exclaimed after taking a sip of the heavily sweetened down drink.

“That’s okay. I did a cleaning job for my cousin a few days ago, this one’s on me.”

Half an hour passed comfortably. Maven told her of how the library’s book club went, and Johanna took the chance to discuss a book she was reading. She felt she could talk to her friend for hours; Maven was so intelligent and well read, it was nearly impossible to get bored when she was near. But their cups were long since empty, and it was time to go. However, there were still things Johanna needed to say.

“Do you want to take a walk in the park? It’s going to be a beautiful sunset by the looks of it.”

Maven bit her lip. She really needed to go home to study, but that really was an offer she couldn’t refuse. So she nodded and they got up, and walked to a little known park near Johanna’s place, one that had many flowers growing wildly and randomly due to lack of attention from the city hall, and even had a small fountain, though cracked in a few places and waterless.

“How does Mr. Kavindi know Ericsonberg’s dean?”, Johanna asked eventually, when they stopped to admire a few celosia flowers. Maven stretched her memory.

“They went to college in Oslo together, if I remember correctly.”

Johanna frowned. “The librarian went to Oslo? But that’s an amazing college! How come he ended up working in a little town? He sounds like he’s from the north, so he can’t have family here!”

That made sense, Maven though. With a good graduation and his natural talent, Mr. Kavindi could probably get a job in a way better place. Sure, Trollberg’s library was gigantic, but that was mainly due to the efforts of one of the first mayors in its history, who had hoped that the town would grow to be one of intellectuals. Maven nearly pitied him.

“Mrs. Kavindi said once that they had met when they were in college and she took a trip to Oslo”, Maven remembered, lifting her eyes to the orange sky on top of them. “And her family is from here. So he probably came to live here because of her.”

“Oh.” Johanna breathed. If that was the case, it was probably one of the most romantic acts she had heard of outside her books. “That must have been quite a sacrifice.”

“Not really” Maven shrugged. “It must have payed off. When you love someone, and they love you, you do whatever it takes to be with them, don’t you?”

Out of the corner of her eye, Johanna realized that Maven had stopped looking at the sky, and was now looking at her. She felt her heart accelerate, beating madly against her ribcage as she faced her friend back.

There were so many things that needed to be discussed. Johanna knew that ideally, she should probably talk about her feelings and the things she had found out first. But Maven was looking at her with so much affection in her beautiful grey eyes, and her short dark hair was just a little bit messy because of the wind, and the golden light of the sunset was throwing golden shadows on her angular face, and honestly, Johanna was just human.

So she closed her eyes and leaned in.

And not after a moment later, Maven leaned in too.

The raven haired girl exhaled heavily. She had been deathly afraid of having mistaken her friend’s intentions, but found instant relief when Johanna pressed her lips against her own. Many thoughts filled her mind, of love and victory and confusion, but she pushed them all aside: she could deal with them later. When she was alone in her room, and Johanna wasn’t kissing her.

Maven took Johanna’s bottom lip between hers, and sighed again at their taste of sweet coffee and honey, being answered with a similar sigh from her love. They hadn’t had any honey at the cafe. She wondered if her lips always tasted like that somehow.

Oh, how she wanted to find out the answer for that question.

She wished she could stay there forever, in that beautiful place with untamed flowers, in that perfect moment of golden light, that little natural miracle that was when day met night. But too soon, they pulled away.

And Maven didn’t “grin”. For most of the town, save her family and Johanna, she didn’t even smile. But in that moment, she was grinning like an idiot. Like the lovesick idiot she had become.

“ I, uh-“ Johanna began, blushing strongly but also with a gigantic smile on her face. “I’m sorry it took so long for me to get the hint. A- about you and about myself too.”

Gods, she looked so cute it was nearly impossible to gather any rational thinking, Maven thought. “Do… do you?” She asked, only realizing that she hadn’t asked a complete question when Johanna cocked her head in confusion. “L-like me, I mean.”

She cursed herself for stuttering, but stopped bothering when Johanna’s face opened up in a smile again. “Yes, I do. Very much.”

And after that, when they didn’t know what to say, they kissed again. And again. And even as she walked home alone later, the stars and the moon her only companions, Maven began thinking that maybe, just maybe, that beautiful dusk could last forever.

_#_#_#_

The Librarian shut the door behind her and all but threw herself on the grey duvet of her bed, feeling the hard mattress against her back. She was downright exhausted. For two years, she had made herself accept the fact that she would never see Johanna again, she had locked her feelings for her where she thought it was safe to say that they wouldn’t haunt her again, and yet there she was. Back in her town, back in her house, back in her damn heart.

She slowly got up from the bed, walking to her windowsill seat and sitting down. Johanna had always had such light around herself that Maven sometimes felt as if she needed to squeeze her eyes to look at her directly. She just radiated warmth that she had craved so deeply. But now that there was a baby, she all but glew whenever it was near. She had been through so much, had gotten her heart broken, and it was clear on her eyes how much she had suffered, but it was also clear that her ability to love had, if anything, multiplied.

Maven drew her legs up to her chest and looked at the waning moon, leaning her head against the bedroom window and catching her own eyes in the reflection. Johanna was so bright and comforting and nutouring, and she was cold and lonely and eerie.

So it didn’t matter that she was back. It didn’t matter that she was staying at her house. It didn’t matter that her heart sang whenever she looked at Johanna and her baby. After all, she told herself as she drew her eyes away from the moon and to its glow on her pale hands, Sun and Moon could never be lovers. The day could never be with the night.

Dusk was just a fleeting moment. Eventually, darkness always came.

#fic: tmwm #the hilda librarian #hilda librarian fanfic #hilda's mum #johanna hilda #sketchbook ship #sketchbook fanfic #sketchbook hilda #sketchbook ship hilda #hilda fanfic #hilda cartoon

[generalthirstclub]

I am the shame of god but here’s the meme

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex) - passes the fuck out. head empty no thoughts - if you’re lucky he might manage to mumble a “goonite” - either way: a literal angel wtf - this bitch tender B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) - I think he knows he’s got cake. he’s double cheeked up. dummy thicc, if you will. - if you have tiddies he likes those. also, on a more innocent note, ur hands!!! and ur stomach and your eyes and your lips and your thighs a C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person) - doesn’t get too riled up about it one way or another - he kinda likes seeing it on you 😳 - not ur face though that’s icky. he doesn’t want any on his face so it doesn’t occur to him that you would - if you specifically ask he’ll be like “ew ok lol” - if you swallow it he goes 😧😳🥴 - I don’t like how confronting this question is because it makes me ponder the logistics of this whole situation D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) - not really a secret but a bitch gets pegged on the reg E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?) - no fucking clue. he’s quick to figure out what works though - real perceptive! - if he can’t figure it out himself, sometimes he might try to ask you whether or not you like something but he can’t get the question out bc he’s baby F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual) - ohohohoho back this mans up against a wall - also you know how he does the splits? th - anything where he’s contorted in some crazy way appeals to him - if he’s topping pls put a leg over his shoulder he will uwu G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc) - he’s a huge dweeb at all times. if something you do or say strikes him the slightest bit funny he’s gonna cackle. - you made a face he thinks is funny? mid coitus he’s snickering. he will imitate your funny face. what a bastard H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.) - I hate this question because it makes me think about the fact that I am writing this about a goddamned train… trains don’t have p*bes… I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)  - oh he’s heart eyes all the way babey. - he might try to put on this Indifferent Sex God act but really? he just likes you a whole lot - smooches. constantly. all the time J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon) - if anyone sees him do that he’ll literally die right there on the spot - he either waits until the dead of night or makes up some excuse as to why he has to leave right now and go alone to some exceedingly secluded part of the rail yard - if it’s the former he can Indulge. the latter is reserved strictly for emergency situations - if a bitch is indulging a bitch is indulging. hes gonna think abt something cute he saw you do (or whoever else hes jerkin it to idk) K = Kink (One or more of their kinks) - pain. both giving and receiving - any kind of marks - hair pulling. also both giving and receiving - praise. praise him. tell him he’s pretty. tell him he’s doing a great job. tell him you love him so much. t L = Location (Favourite places to do the do) - pretty vanilla about this one actually (see N) - push him up against a wall - or let him push u up against a wall! the red caboose would like to be of use mother fucker! M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) - being a little shit - read: when he’s bratty and you snap at him - or the other way around - also? feeling wanted. when he does something vaguely sexy and sees someone looking at him for too long. N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) - anything in public— he’d just be so embarrassed if you were caught! also I feel like consent is a huge thing for him and whoever walks in on 2 people fucking did not consent to seeing that - anything especially degrading to his partner, though he doesn’t mind being called a little slut if he’s bottoming 😳 - not really into the whole pet play thing. “that’s silly! you’re not a dog!” O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) - again, no clue what the fuck he’s doing (see E) - very eager to please however! and you can’t tell me this bastard doesn’t have any oral fixation I mean look at him - n e wayz if he’s giving the best thing about it is how excited he gets. super messy as well. drools everywhere. - if he’s receiving then his pillow princess levels are maxing out. he’s having a good time. straight vibing if you will - you went and sucked all his braincells out thru his dick! - tries to cover his mouth but he’s not gonna be that much quieter (see V) P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.) - entirely depends on his fickle moods. sometimes he’s in that Cherishing Mood. other times he’s a wild untamed feral fucking animal Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.) - not very often. I don’t imagine he’d prefer it. - however if he’s in that wild untamed feral fucking animal mood he’s not opposed to it R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) - as long as it definitely won’t kill either of you he’s down - big fan of knifeplay tbh. - In general he’s more willing to risk hurting himself than his partner bc he definitely likes you and would be upset if you got hurt S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…) - leans more towards one long round than a bunch of short rounds because (see A) this motherfucker busts one nut and is out like a light - he only lasts as long as he does (which is to say, very average) by sheer force of will. unfortunately sometimes this means stopping for a second to get ahold of himself T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?) - seems like the type to have like. One (1) big old dildo that NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT!!! U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) - ooohohoho so much - (see M) sometimes he does vaguely sexy stuff,,, on purpose 😔 - again idk how to approach this for anthro trains but if we think of them as just people then uh - wears clothes that he knows will show his tumtum if he stretches 😳 and then he stretches 😳 in front of u - it’s an easy way to read people! if they have no interest in him then they won’t pay it any mind. if they do, this is the easiest possible way to figure out about it V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) - louder than average for sure - starts out with just his breathing changing audibly, - then that changes to either high whines or low growls (depending on what’s happening) - he’ll try to muffle himself either by covering his mouth or keeping it closed. it won’t work - a lot of “mmf”s are still gonna get through 😔 - if you can convince him to uncover his mouth… fuckin get ready - hes about to sound super pretty and breathless 🥺🥺🥺 - if you had a mcr phase and you remember destroya… it’s like that kinda - you know how wide his vocal range is? it shows W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice) - he makes real cute faces and is super embarrassed about it - tries to hide his face in the crook of your shoulder 🥺 - on an unrelated note I feel like he’d call it “making love.” just cause he’s baby X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) - just a regular old pp? he seems like the type to be a little shorter than average but his diameter game is certainly not lacking Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?) - not terribly but when he’s ready he’s READY Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) - IMMEDIATELY

#I FUCKIBG ADORE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS #YESSSSS #ANON I OWE YOU MY LIFE #THIS IS KINDA HOT... #NSFVV #DEAR LORD I LOVE HIM #submission

[hjertetssunnegalskap1]

Hi. For the director's thing, I'd love to know a bit more about the first chapter of Don't Leave Me (Alone) please. What made you decide to write it that way and how the more supernatural elements came about.

Ah, thank you so much for this ask! I ended up writing a far too long post about it. Kudos to anyone that actually reads it.

Don’t leave me (alone) was my very first Skam fic, well, my very first fic ever, so it has a special place in my heart. It’s hard to recall what made me decide to write it. I recall that the idea for the fic started out pretty simple, though. I wanted to write Isak and Even meeting as adults (but realizing that they had met before). I had an idea about Isak coming back to Oslo from his studies in Trondheim (yeah, I’m a psychic, I predicted Andem’s headcanon, lol). 

I wanted to write Isak a little lonely, lost and not knowing what to do next:  

He walks with long, quiet steps. There’s no reason to be quick, and he can decide which hotel to sleep in later. He stares at the pavement in front of him. Things are a bit shitty at the moment, he has to admit. Right now, he has no place to stay, no boyfriend, no job. Well, that isn’t exactly true; he has a possibility to work as a biology teacher at Hartvig Nissen, but he’s not particularly tempted.

Most people his age have jobs, houses and cars, and some even start to have kids. Whereas he has almost everything he owns in the backpack and suitcase. The thought gives him an uneasy feeling in his gut. It hadn’t been his intention to come home like this. He was going to come back with a good education, safe job and a bright future ahead of him. He had been close, too; he had studied at the university, and did well. But he never found a job that he wanted. On top of that, he hadn’t quite managed to make friends in Trondheim. He had made a couple of acquaintances, and had enjoyed some hookups, but still ended up spending most of his time home alone. It was like his whole life was on hold, waiting for something.

Yeah, “not knowing what to do” is a recurring theme in my stories, and I can’t really call it self insert, since I was determined to do what I did after high school (I was pretty sure I couldn’t make a living of writing and painting, so I chose something more reliable).

Anyway. I wanted Isak and Even to meet and have this sort of magical day that set everything in motion between them. Making a sort of one-night-stand to friends to lovers thing. When I tried to figure out where they should meet, I wanted to begin where their story sort of ended in the show, in Sagene church. I imagined that scene pretty clearly from the start, with Isak remembering meeting this unknown boy there, seven years ago, and then suddenly stumbling over the same guy, at the same place. 

For a moment, Isak almost wonders if the guy has materialized from his thoughts. That’s ridiculous, of course. It must just be a weird coincidence. 

Isak can’t look away. He just can’t. It is like those blue eyes hold him, and look right into him. His face burns, his heart races, all kinds of feelings tumble in his belly. His hands feel heavy, like they long to touch the other guy, making sure he is real. Isak struggles to shut his mouth and not look like an idiot.

I also imagined their moment in the church very clearly. I have done just what Isak and Even are doing here, once, crashing a funeral with someone I liked. And I guess that’s why the scene came easily to me.

But then the organ starts playing, and the little group of people in the front starts to sing another psalm. The sound of the melancholy hymn and the thin voices is oddly gripping: To live, it is to love/ the best your soul could reach/ to live it is in work/ searching richer goals. The words hit Isak hard, thinking about the lonely life of the deceased, and how it mirrors his own boring life.  

My translation of the hymn is probably awful, but I’m kinda pleased with how I made that scene come together. Isak has a strong reaction to it all, and leaves. 

The second part of this chapter is in Even’s perspective, and it was really interesting to write things in his point of view, both to explore his experiences of fears and doubts, but also to show his dorky side.

Now Isak turns around, facing him, and Even is forced to drop his hands from his shoulders. His looks still take Even’s breath away, just as they did in the church back when they were kids. Isak is still golden, but far from a boy, even if Even can see he still has sort of a boyish charm. Despite that impression, he is a man, with strong features and dark, green eyes. Even still feels the overwhelming want in his hands, the want to hold him, and the want to sense his skin. He has this excitement in his body and buzzing feeling in his fingers, something that makes him wonder if he is starting to become manic again, so he holds back.

Need to stay in control.

Isak meets his gaze for a moment, looking a bit embarrassed, and Even smiles at him.

– Okay, Even says, and tries to sound reassuring. – It seems like you are better now. But if it’s okay, I want to follow you to wherever you are going. Just to be sure you are all right.

Smooth. Even is quite pleased with himself.

I see now that even if the perspectives are altering, I do maybe write Isak’s perspective clearer than Even’s. Or maybe it feels like that in chapter one because Isak has more parts (in the second chapter Even has more). 

In the next part, we’re in Isak’s head again, and they have a stop at Hartvig Nissen. I guess it’s easy to notice that I picked locations from the show and built the story around it. The story more or less starts at the church, and they visit several of the sites, but just in a jumbled order. Of course, I did some changes, the cafeteria turned into a coffee shop and things like that. Also, while the locations are sort jumbled compared to the show, the scenes parallel the show pretty closely. It helped me find a structure for the story.  

As they have a chat in the schoolyard, they talk about before, and I get the opportunity to parallel some of the moments from the show that I love. Like this one:

Isak looks at Even. – Which school did you go to?

– Bakka.        

Even glances at him, and looks ridiculously hot with his swoopy hair and bright, blue eyes.

Isak swallows, but puts on a cocky face. – That figures, he smiles. – Elvebakken is the place to go for hipster movie makers or media wannabes, isn’t it?

– Ha ha. 

Even smiles at Isak, but there is something serious in his eyes. – I almost transferred to Nissen, actually, in my last year. That is, I got delayed for a year, and then I thought about changing schools.

– Really? Why?

Even`s gaze at him is thoughtful. – It’s a long story. I can tell you over a beer some time. 

I can tell you. Some time. Isak likes that little promise. 

– But I decided that I wasn’t that kind of person, Even continues.

Isaks looks at him. – What kind of person?

Even shrugs. – I didn’t want to be that kind of person who quits, I guess.

Sounds familiar, you say? If you have read more than one of my Skam fics, you know that I make parallels to this, over and over again. I just can’t seem to let go of it, for some reason. 

Oh, I must also comment something about the horrible dick jokes. As we know, Isak and Even has this thing where they do a lot of banter, and I knew that banter wasn’t something I wrote easily. So to help myself to add some humor between them, I added some silly dick jokes. I’m not sure about how well it worked, but I guess it helped me get over the fear of writing banter. 

Anyway. In the next part, Isak struggles to find a hotel and Even takes an initiative. And in the next and final part, they go to Even’s flat and things heat up. I don’t know if I should say more about it. I can’t quote everything in this fic, this post is already far too long. Also, I shouldn’t spoil everything. However, I can say that I wanted to write this situation where everything happens a bit too fast, perhaps, and then take it from there. 

So, about the supernatural elements. Right now, I can’t recall exactly which magical scene that started the whole magical realism thing. Maybe it was the one in the church. I think that Isak had a moment where everything got blurry and he felt that he knew Even from before. I had planned to just have just a few moments like that and leave it as a mystery (I’m weak for magical realism and it tends to pop up in my writing from time to time). But my amazing beta reader saw the potential and helped me see more places that I could add more magic. And that magical realism thing became a big part of the whole fic. Actually, it became the most important part of the story. And the most fun part was that it fit surprisingly well with the idea of parallel universes. 

Here’s an example of one of these moments in the church: 

One moment he has this vision, of himself in another life, where he has chosen love, and living for real, where he laughs and cries and lives, and it takes his breath away. It’s bizarre, but he sees himself with Even, with this guy next to him, and they do everything together; they kiss, laugh, fuck, fight and cry and kiss again, and it can’t be right, because it almost feels like memories. Memories from another life that never was.  To live, it is like the ocean, / to mirror the heavens.

What is happening to him? Isak can’t breathe. It is like he is trapped. 

As a result, this chapter changed quite a lot from my first draft, as I added more magic moments and as I knew where the story would go. I guess I learned a lot, writing this thing, about how stories can change and turn into something more than you imagine from the start.

#skam #evak #fic writing #director's commentary #don't leave me (alone) #Anonymous

[almasidaliano]

Here’s the thing about Religion:

so i'm not religious. i am spiritual. to each's own, whatever you believe in, im simply happy you believe in something.

i grew up christian, i guess. uh baptist, ame, and non denominational. resonated most with non demoninational, even gave sermon when i was 15. and i loved it, truly. church is what threw me for a loop the most in religion, and members of the congregation. it's like hard to want to follow something when followers aren't people you would imagine when you think "Christ-like" you know?

i have always been skeptical about christianity. about religion in general really. so you talk to god and he hears you and he gets back to you with a signal or sign, a blessing or a lesson etc. very seldom people go through these experiences where they have truly heard the voice of God or seen some silohuette or something. its all about faith. and that wasn't the issue. "walk by faith not by sight" right? okay. it was the discrimination. the way people take it upon themselves to condemn others. the amount of sins people commit by simply having a judgemental conversation in a holy building is beyond me. the way the pastors feed off of the congregation. churches should be tax exempt meaning they are getting plenty to sustain their building from the government. why is the congregation dropping money in collection plates?

tides and offerings. paying dues. what about buying food for someone who was hungry? or simply giving some money to someone in need? why is it you go through your week being christ like giving tides and offerings selfishly whole heartedly, just to come to church and twice maybe three times a collection plate goes around while the pastor giving some motivational speech about how he know you got it; knowing you probably don't so to speak.

the most repetitive thing in the bible is not to judge and christians have got to be some of the most judgemental people i have ever known. when it comes to religion so many believers want to passively play god. they want to decide who is worth saving and who is condemned, who is living right, and what they need to be doing with their life. and that is not their job nor their place. you love thy neighbor. it never said unless xyz. no. simply love thy neighbor. it means be kind. love can be passive. it's treating humans like humans and not animals. common decency; which like common sense is less than common.

each religion has like its commandments you know those clear set of rules. i personally never thought these were things that needed to be clarified on the do not do list, however society. when you really break it down though, it is simple. be a good person. don't steal, don't kill. don't commit adultry (being loyal and faithful). etc. there are hundreds of stories in the bible. each open for each individual's interpretation.

if the title of the Creator is God then God is a woman. male and female exist yes i just think there is a little bit left off to the story. if there's a battle of the sexes women are the superior. first, there's father time and mother nature. time is a construct, it does not actually exist. ashes to ashes dust to dust. we all come from the earth.

see how the white man created a male god and sent his male son to save us all. "this is a man's world" (the Devil is a white man. and God is a black woman.) that is true, why? because Earth is the Devil's playground. what is so crazy is that the devil is this symbol of desire and guilty pleasures, rebellion and such and here we have the power to choose. life is about experiences. thinking for yourself doesn't make you a menace, how else do you learn? self knowledge is the best knowledge.

the Nation of Islam, is the prominent black religion. Catholicism and Scientology are the most prominent white religions. Catholicism enables sodomy and pedophilia. Scientology is a tax exempt cult, pretty much controlling the media and lowkey the United States. the Nation partnered with them and have been getting some heat from it, however i think they are trying to take it down. as time has progressed, everyone has gotten smarter. talk about a trojan horse.

Scientology and Catholicism kind of rule the country. all the many branch religions from catholicism just get ranked under that, however those two mainly. Scientology is a full blown brainwashing cult. they are the abusive partner in a domestic violence situation. most religion is. it's like religion or life. religion or family. religion or you know? more division. Scientology is more extreme in the sense that they really have policies and such enforced behind the rules and expectations. However, the same dynamic is kind of true for other religions. people get shunned and become estranged from their families frequently due to religious disagreements. it is truly disheartening because if someone is supposedly lost and you are their loved one, or simply a member of the following, why wouldnt you keep supporting them in the sense of like love companionship an ear to listen. instead, they force people to choose between trusting themselves and trusting their religion.

if your religion makes you question yourself take a look at it. you may be fucking up, you may not. however, blind trust will lead you off a cliff. almost all if not all religions talk about Jesus in one way or the other. there is truth in everything see? the Bible says its blasphemy to read another holy text. i want to find a Bible in the original script before people came with their intentions and made it what they wanted.

let's talk homosexuality for a moment. now i dont know how other religions work, however in christianity, christians love to condemn a homosexual. first thing, WHAT DOES WHO SOMEONE ELSE LOVES HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH ANY OUTSIDER? nothing. nothing at all. it has never been anyone's place to tell someone who they can and cannot love. there are scriptures, however they talk about pedetry and sodomy, rape, and male prostitution. crazy thing, it speaks a lot about males not committing homosexual acts but im pretty sure only comes up once about women and the topic was still men.

here's what i think: like i said god is a woman. so if the stories still hold true, humans were created right? so male and man have prefixes. these are word parts that come before. adding these prefixes creates woman and female. in that, i feel as though women were here first. (probably considering all babies start as females and then whilst developing testes drop or don't.) men cannot carry children, they don't have the nutrients in their bodies, they too have nipples however they don't produce milk. men were created as a tool. like a whole ass donor or carrier. men do not like to be "second in command". they feel like in order to be a man and wear the pants, they must do all the providing while a woman does the nurturing. whereas women are multifaceted and great at multitasking. men are constantly thinking like squirrels trying to get nuts. that's all they are here for lol. women could rule the world.

toats just a random theory: what if eve eating the apple and gaining knowledge was the knowledge of true love. like what if shorty realized she aint love dude they were just made for each other lmao. like men are here for reproduction. and to help when a woman's hand are full. i mean like they are in the garden and shit all happy and shit then shorty eat the apple give it to dude and they like oh no we naked. so they go find bushes and leaves and make some lil clothes or coverings. its the knowledge of good and evil so what if their union was evil lol in the sense of bad. like they get caste out stay together have two sons and one kill the other on some hateful envious shit. men provoke violence and evil. they are so prideful. so its like men love women, because they were made to help repopulate and to some extent protect. that's why men think with their dick heads. maybe that's why homosexuality is a "sin" or they try and press the issue; because of rape and sodomy. also, in effort to keep women unhappy since men were too. like it says man and man shouldn't be together, blatantly. not woman. man. because it was unconsensual, and they are here for reproduction so they kinda wasting product getting off elsewhere if you know get what i am saying. lol its a loose theory just popped in my head. however, it kind of makes sense. this lifetime we learning and experiencing things. at the beginning of the lifetime there was woman and then male was created with the tools needed to procreate. as life progressed, there are now ways for same sex female couples to have children. currently only girls can be born due to the lack of "Y" chromosome, however in due time. it is still presently possible for a child have two birth mothers in the present. that is what life is for, the condension of One Sound Consciousness (basically the big bang except not how they described it.). the condension of the Consciousness means when the Creator decided on this lifetime and created every single thing in it us included in order to experience each and every part of their creation. the Creator knows all, can create all, however has not experienced all; that is what lifetimes are for. the experience. the knowledge gained.

always trust the vibes. energy never lies. your body is a radar. you must protect your peace. meditation is like prayer, except broader. in my opinion you let go of so much weight and you gain so much clarity. do not stop believing. always believe in something. mainly yourself. if nothing else. the things that you eat matter too.  there are religions against eating pork, all slaves had was pig parts and pig's food. personally, i think it strengthened our bodies against more diseases and such like made us immune.

religion is simply something to believe in. spirituality is actuality. energy is undeniable. you can feel vibrations. and if you can't open your third eye because you are sleep and we need to be woke. we are superhuman. we have superpowers. for centuries, we have been under a curse of mental slavery. (sound familiar? this is why our ancestors laid down and took it. this is why my melanated friends still laying down and taking it.

having faith supposed to make you stop being afraid to die. so do yall not actually believe in something? because i get (ish) in general not wanting to die if you can help it. however, what part of the life you living is worth living truly? if you sat down and looked at the cards you were dealt, could you honestly say "nah im good, it could be worse ima ride it out." or some shit? would you truly rather live this life than fight for the life you want, the life you deserve and maybe die in the process? so what if they gone kill you anyway?

you know they out to kill us anyway. this is the land of the free and the home of the brave. you gotta be brave to be free. we caged or running the streets. "Ye though I walk throw the valley of the shadow of death i shall fear no evil-" trust yourself and give it to the universe.

We will prevail. We will prevail. We will prevail.

your God already knows your heart, learn yourself and fight like hell for peace, equality, and harmony.

-Almasi

[leviskitten]

𝑵𝑺𝑭𝑾 𝒂𝒍𝒑𝒉𝒂𝒃𝒆𝒕 ♡

Bruno Bucciarati x reader(gn)

Warnings: general nsfw themes, nothing dark so dw.

A/n: and anotha one, but this time it’s my baby boy bruno 🥰🥰 (ps. I have a one-shot of him coming up soon but for now enjoy this).

Original template

♡彡 A = Aftercare : What are they like after sex?

• Ok but hear me out, he’s the KING of aftercare and you cannot convince me otherwise.

He would run you a bath, and bathe you as well (unless you don’t want him to, in that case he’ll give you your space). Then he’d gently cuddle with you in his probably way too big bed and caress you until you fall sleep. Or would bring you some water and snacks so you don’t go to bed with an empty stomach 🥺

♡彡 B = Body : What’s their favorite body part of theirs? And yours?

• He likes his legs probably. I headcannon that he has ~gorgeous legs, so he probably likes them a lot.

On you, he doesn’t really have a favorite body part. I feel like he’d be the type of guy to love you as a whole, and doesn’t really notice details like that. But if you really want an answer, then I guess it’ll be your hands or something like that.

♡彡 C = Cum : Anything to do with cum basically.

• Idk why, but I feel like he cums a lot. Like, he shoots massive loads each time he cums. Which would probably be the main reason of why he’s not a big fan of cumming more than twice. And it would also be reason why he insists on cumming on you a lot of times.

Now don’t get me wrong, he loves the feeling of cumming in you and filling you up to the brim. But there’s just something in seeing you covered in his massive loads that just makes him go all fuzzy and 🥰🥰

♡彡 D = Dirty Secret : Share a dirty secret of theirs.

• He really wants to have a threesome with you and Abbachio.

He thought of it once randomly and now the scenario just keeps floating in his mind ever since. And he has a hard time trying not to stare everytime you and Abbachio interact.

Just the thought of you messy with his lipstick while both of them fuck you relentlessly makes him feel lightheaded.

♡彡 E = Experience : How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?

• He probably had a little bit of prior experience, however it doesn’t really matter, because he knows what he likes and how to get it (while giving you what you want as well of course). So he definitely knows what he’s doing, don’t worry about it.

♡彡 F = Favorite Position : Self explanatory

• Not to be basic, but probably missionary or mating press.

I feel like he’s more of a soft service dom (who would sub or turn into a hard dom if asked), and a little bit of a classic romantic, so he probably likes to go at it soft and slow, for which missionary and mating press are prefect for.

♡彡 G = Goofy : How serious are they during the moment? Do they like to joke around?

• He’s probably really serious and focused on the moment, however if you laugh or joke at something and he finds it funny too, he would laugh, tho he’ll try to brush it off and go back at it again smh.

♡彡 H = Hair : How well groomed are they? Does the carpet matches the drapes?

• Oh he’s extremely well groomed down there, and everywhere else really.

Either completely shaved, or well trimmed, and would never EVER smell bad. He likes to take care of himself, so you would never catch this man slippin when it comes to that. (And yes ofc the carpet matches the drapes he has black hair lol).

♡彡 I = Intimacy : How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect.

• Oh he loooves to be really intimate. Calling you sweet italian nicknames, praising you on how good you feel/how good you respond to him, kissing you constantly, grabbing your hands, etc.

And yes, he does tells you he loves you right after you both cum. It’s almost mandatory.

♡彡 J = Jack off : Masturbation headcannon.

• He doesn’t masturbate that often, but when he does, he likes to do it in the shower. Mainly so he can feel extra relaxed once he comes out of it.

♡彡 K = Kink : One or more of their kinks

• He’s fairly kinky, surprisingly, though he has a soft approach with them. Anyways, here’s a little list:

— Choking, finger sucking, praise (for both ways please 🥺), hair tugging (on him), spit (will spit on your mouth, no questions asked), anything to do with mirrors (main reason why he has a giant mirror somewhere in his room), LINGERIE (on both you and himself), edging maybe, cum play, pet play, and biting.

♡彡 L = Location : Favorite place to do it.

• Either his room, or his office. Probably his room the most, he likes the privacy and intimacy of it. However he can’t deny that the thrill of getting caught in his office is kinda hot.

♡彡 M = Motivation : What turns them on/keep them going?

• Knowing that you’re enjoying it too.

I feel like he’s a very giving person, so there’s nothing better for him than to know that you’re feeling as good as him, specially knowing that it’s him who’s making you feel like this.

Praise him and tell him that he’s doing amazing please 🥺🥺

♡彡 N = No : Something that they wouldn’t do/turn off’s

• Probably anything extremely rough, like impact play or heavy heavy degradation.

He already sees enough violence on the daily, there’s no need to bring it into the bedroom too.

♡彡 O = Oral : Preference on giving/receiving, skill, etc.

• Again, he’s a soft/service dom. Which means that he can and will eat you out as much as he likes only to make you feel good/show his appreciation.

However he does enjoy the blowjobs from under his desk while he works a little bit too much.

♡彡 P = Pace : Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? Etc

• He likes to go at it slow and steady most of the time. Peppering you with kisses and whispering sweet stuff on your ear while he does it.

But he would speed it up or go a little bit more rough if you want him to. All you gotta do is ask~

♡彡 Q = Quickie : Their opinion on quickies, how often, etc.

• Not a big fan tbh.

He likes to take his time with you, so unless it’s a quick blowjob under his desk or something similar then don’t even bother to bring it up (mainly because he would tease you gently and make you wait until you both have enough time to actually do something about it).

♡彡 R = Risk : Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? Etc.

• He’s willing to take a few risks, if he thinks the cause for them is good enough. And he’s pretty open to experiment new stuff, as long as it’s not something extremely violent or rough.

♡彡 S = Stamina : How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?

• To be honest, he can go for as many rounds as you want him to. Like I said earlier, he likes to take his time with you, so naturally, he does have the stamina to be able to do that lol.

♡彡 T = Toys : Do they own toys? Do they use them? On themselves or his partner?

• He owns a few toys, but mainly to use them on you. Like a couple of different vibrators, or buttplugs, etc. Though if you want to use them on him then he wouldn’t necessarily complain lol.

♡彡 U = Unfair : How much do they like to tease?

• Look, he might be soft and all. But this mf will tease the hell out of you when he’s bored.

I’m talking about secretly touching you under the table during a meeting, whispering dirty stuff on your ear as he passes by, taking you to a secret corner while you guys are doing something important just to have a little make out session and touch you just to leave you hanging. And stuff like that.

♡彡 V = Volume : How loud are they? What sounds do they make? Etc.

• He’s not that loud, but he does make a lot of pretty sounds.

Grunts and deep moans while he fucks you, also panting. Will moan while giving you head, or while kissing. And the only time when you’ll get to see him whiny and flustered is when you give him a blowjob, idk why.

♡彡 W = Wild card : A random headcannon for the character.

• At some point of your relationship he will get you a matching lingerie set like the one he wears under his suit. And yes, he’ll make you wear it constantly, specially if he can see bits of it through your outfit. He thinks it’s cute lol.

♡彡 X = X-Ray : Let’s see what’s going on under those clothes

• His dick is a little darker than the rest of his body, like, it’s tanned almost. And he’s cut, for sure. Probably average length, but it’s more on the thicker side, and it’s quite veiny tbh.

♡彡 Y = Yearning : How high it their sex drive?

• Meh, it’s pretty regular. He’s not that much of a horny bastard, but he still likes to do it once a week or something just because he can (and if you’re up for it of course).

♡彡 Z = Zzz : How quickly do they fall asleep afterwards.

• He does get a little more sleepy after it, but he doesn’t fall asleep that quickly. Which is why he mainly likes to make sure you’re doing alright afterwards and just treat you some more.

#bruno bucciarati #bucciaratibruno #jjba bruno #jjba bucciarati #jojo bruno #jojo bucciarati #bucciarati x reader #bucciarati x abbacchio #bruno bucciarati x reader #bruno x reader #bruno x abbacchio #bruno x leone #jjba x reader #jojo x reader #jjba part 5 #jjba hcs #[🌸]— bucciarati #[🎀]— txt.

[imagineurfavs]

The Boyz Q: A-Z

“Hii, can I request A-Z for Kevin and Q from the boyz, thank you so much!!!!”

----------

A - Aftercare He’s pretty good with the basics; a towel, and maybe a glass of water. He’ll happily oblige to anything beyond that, but you’ll have to specifically ask for it lmao

B - Body Part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner) On himself, he loves his hands, specifically his fingers, they’re nice and long and can always get you in all the right places. On his partner he loves their legs 

C - Cum Likes to cum on you, literally anywhere, the messier the better. He’ll just kinda  let it go anywhere. He’ll always just kinda sit back and admire his masterpiece for a minute before getting you a towel lol

D - Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs) Now, it’s not really a secret to you, but he loves to film or photograph the two of you whenever you're going at it, the more explicit the better. He’ll keep them for his spank bank that he uses whenever he’s away from you for too long lol. It’s the reason why he’s so protective over his phone.

E - Experience Eeeeh probably a little bit. I feel like he’s fooled around quite a lot, but probably only had full on sex a couple of times

F - Favourite Position Definitely doggy. He can be free to set the pace as rough as he wants and he gets to watch your ass jiggle as he pounds into you lmao. If not that then he’s always a fan of having you up against the wall.

G - Goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous etc) He’s really not all that goofy in the moment, all his focus is on getting you both off, he’ll kinda just zone out for a little bit, like, all the blood is in his dick not his brain lol. It’s afterwards that he gets all giggly and mushy 

H - Hair (how well groomed are they) Super well groomed and tidy, not a single hair out of place.

I - Intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect) Mans is a Scorpio, so he’s gonna be super intimate, even when he’s being pretty rough lmao. Whilst he can be intimate, it’s almost a dark kinda intimacy, like, the atmosphere is very heavy lol he takes this shit seriously. Sex is the best way for him to express his emotions.

J - Jack Off (Masturbation) I lowkey feel like he’s the type of person to do it every day. Even if he’s not particularly in The Mood, it’s pretty much just become a point of his daily routine at this point. Usually he’ll just do it in bed so that he can fall asleep fully relaxed

K - Kinks (one of more of their kinks) Likes inflicting pain. Not a huge amount, just enough to sting and leave a mark lmao, he’s for sure a spanker and will leaves hickeys all over you. Which ig means he’s into marking as well lmao. He loves being scratched too, he feels so proud whenever he catches a sight of the red lines down his back in the following days

L - Location (Favourite places to do the do) Just bc of how...intense, he likes to get, he much prefers to keep in in the bedroom. That way you’re both free to do whatever you want and be as loud as your heart desires.

M - Motivation (What turns them on) I feel like he’s suuuper easy to rile up lmao. Literally anything even vaguely sexual just makes his imagination go wild. He’s one of those people where something so simple as watching you eat anything even vaguely phallic will set him off. You really wouldn't have to try very hard to get him in the mood lol

N - NO (something they won't do, turn offs) Tbh, I dont picture Changmin as being someone with any hard limits, he’s super open to trying anything and will give anything a go once. I feel like maybe he’d be a little insecure about bringing other people into the bedroom, but that’s about it.

O - Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) He’s for sure not opposed to giving oral, he’s just not the best at it. He’s a lot better with his fingers that he is with his mouth. Given the option he’d much prefer to receive, but he’s not afraid to try and get better so maybe let him practice on you lmao ;))))

P - Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc) He’ll start off a bit slow, but he’ll get much faster as he finds his rhythm. Maybe a little bit on the rougher side, not so much that you wont be able to walk or anything, but you’ll for sure still be feeling it afterwards. 

Q - Quickies (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc) He wasn’t always a fan, purely bc they don’t give him the time he needs to be able to go all out. But sometimes they're the only option. Over time he’s really come to enjoy them, he really finds the kinda frantic needy energy so fun

R - Risk (are they down to experiment, do they take risks?) He’s TOTALLY down, the riskier the better. As long as there’s no danger of like, lasting injury or anything...illegal, he’s always down to do anything and everything.

S - Stamina (how many rounds can they go, how long do they last? etc) You’ll for sure be getting more than one round out of Changmin lmao, just bc i feel like he doesn’t really last all that long. It also doesn't take too long for him to bounce back and be ready to go again lol

T - Toy (do they own toys do they use them on a partner or on themselves?) He loves them, especially if they're something that can be used on him as well as you. He’s certainly not against having toys used on him. Probably owns some cuffs, super pretty ropes and maybe some kinda paddle lol. Bought a remote control vibrator that he’s just itching to use on you in public lmao

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease) HE. IS. SUCH. A. TEASE. He lives for making you squirm. He’ll whisper the most sinful things to you, or have his and a little too high on your leg in public and watch your face go bright red, just to innocently ask “you okay y/n? you look a little flustered” He’s evil.

V - Volume (how loud are they, what type of sounds they make) He’s really not all that loud. Maybe gets a little bit whiny as he gets close to finishing but aside from some drawn out sighs here and there, he’s pretty quiet.

W - Wild Card (a random headcannon) Whilst he can be super rough and a lil bit on the dominant side, I feel like Changmin has a SUPER hidden submissive side that he keeps firmly locked away. It’s when he’s super tired and worn out that this side of him comes out. He won’t ever be super submissive however, but he’ll get whiny and almost a little bit bratty. He just wants to be taken care of and treated like a prince lmao

X - X-ray (what's going on inside those pants) Average length, maybe on the slimmer side but kinda pretty and veiny 

Y - Yearning (How high is their sex drive) Pretty high, he’s always ready to do something; whether thats full on sex or just fooling around, anything. You just have to say the word and he’ll have his trousers down in 0.2 seconds flat.

Z - Zzz... (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards) Tbh, I feel like he wont be sleeping for quite a while afterwards. He just gets all chatty and giggly, he’ll just wanna stay up and talk about everything.

#the boyz #the boyz reactions #the boyz imagines #the boyz a-z #the boyz a z #tbz #tbz reactions #tbz imagines #tbz scenarios #the boyz scenarios #the boyz q #the boyz changmin #ji changmin #changmin reactions #the boyz smut #tbz smut #kpop smut #kpop reactions #Kpop A-Z

[billyggruff]

On Bismuth

I would have answered this in a reblog, but apparently some people decide responding and then subsequently locking the convo or whatever is a way to win an debate. It’s not by the by.

my answers are in bold, responses are in italics, and this post is just regular. 

*“The issue is the show is trying to show Bismuth in the wrong when she clearly was not.”*

Sorry, but you choosing to interpret Bismuth as being in the right does not actually make her in the right, especially when the show portrays her actions as wrong.

This is just a non answer. All it is is a “Nuh uh you are wrong.” You don’t tell me how I’m wrong or give evidence of it or anything besides the flimsy “the writers think she’s wrong.” But she isn’t. Bismuth is a soldier in a wartime situation. She was in that wartime mentality even after she was bubbled because they don’t seem to register time passing. She didn’t GET thousands of years to come to grips with all her comrades being shattered or turned into monstrosities. It was all as fresh as the day and hour Rose had bubbled her. Then she finds out that she was right, and everyone she knows and cares about has been shattered if not worse. 

*“She offered Rose a way (albeit a super impractical way but that’s for a different topic) to shatter the Diamonds, and Rose Bubbled her for it.”*

Actually, it is VERY strongly implied that she attacked Rose when she refused, and Rose was forced to poof and bubble her in self-defence. After all, she tried to do the same thing to Steven, so it’s very likely that the encounter between her and Rose went the same way. In fact, she also made it pretty damn clear that she wanted to use the Breaking Point not just on the Diamonds, but on Homeworld Gems in general. You know, the very people they were trying to liberate?

We do not know what went down that day. We do know they fought, and that Rose won. Bismuth was trying to end the war and liberate the gems via shattering the diamonds. Rose was trying to play batman no kill rules in a wartime scenario. You cannot effectively wage a war when your general is only allowing half measures. It’s probably why they ended up losing so many people in the first place. Garnet even spoke of all the gems shattered during that time. Shattered gems that were likely turned into experiments later. 

“What happened after that? The Diamonds basically nuked the planet with their song, corrupting every gem that wasn’t in Rose’s immediate vicinity, be they loyal to homeworld or not. They then used shattered gems in experiments, fusing their stones together in ways that traumatized Garnet upon seeing it. These abhorrent experiments were just the precursor to the cluster, which was supposed to be a planet sized lovecraftian abomination in the Gems eyes.”

Okay cool. Shattering Homeworld’s forces would have still been abhorrent though.

False equivalency much? Those are nowhere near on this same caliber of bad. Not even close. This is a wartime situation with a rebellion against a tyrannical force. They were fighting for their freedom and their survival, while the enemy combatants were going to be turning them into monsters, experiments, and the cluster itself. You don’t get to play the “killing is bad mkay?” card when the enemy is literally a tyrannical regime bent on exterminating any opposition and turning their corpses into weapons to strengthen their power. In War, and I cannot stress that part enough, killing is necessary in order to facilitate a victory if not a surrender from your opponent. 

“Bismuth didn’t know about any of that, she wasn’t around long enough to.”

Then it doesn’t actually help your argument.

If you had been paying attention, I had said specifically that “She would be even MORE livid if she knew half the things that happened after she had been bubbled. 

“What she did know was Rose’s half measures in war caused all of her friends to be shattered.”

Okay, that is just straight up fan interpretation. Sorry, but, you can’t use fan theories as an argument. It’s not valid.

Except its not though. 

“What type of Leader doesn’t give her Army the best chance to win! How could you value the gems of our enemies more than our own? And look what you’ve done without me, without the Breaking Point!  You’ve LOST! ”

Her words exactly. This is not a Fan interpretation, this is just reading the dialogue as it is. You just don’t like it cause she’s right. Rose DID lose and it’s because she didn’t do what she needed to do as a Leader in a wartime situation. 

“As for attacking Steven, it’s been more than established by this point that Gems have no concept on what children even are.”

Cool. Attempted murder is still attempted murder.

“Bismuth was attacking Rose for betraying everyone with her weak, limp wrist battle strategies.”

Cool. Attempted murder is still attempted murder.

Come ALL the way off of it with that nonsense lol. “Attempted murder is still attempted murder.” I suppose you’re gonna get on Star Butterfly’s case for blasting Toffee out of existence too? Or how about the slew of protagonists in any show or movie ever that takes out swaths of grunts and even the big bad without batting an eye? 

We are talking about a WARTIME situation with a General who is not fit to lead her troops into battle, not a peacetime squabble between civilians. If you wanted to say she was being Treasonous or was attempting a Coup then SURE you would have a point. However leave this civilian talk to peacetime, which they aren’t. 

“These are the kinds of war crimes you read about in history books decades and centuries after the fact.”

Funny, I don’t remember reading about sound weapons that turn soldiers into monsters or stitching together dead soldiers to create undead abominations. The hell kind of history books have you been reading?

Snark and facetiousness is going to get you nowhere in a debate. YOU KNOW what I meant. 

“Bismuth is more than warranted in wanting to liberate everyone with lethal force.”

No, she isn’t. She is in the wrong. Sorry.

Again, no reasoning given, nothing sited. “She’s just wrong, that’s it. now I’ll disable replies. (or whatever happened to prevent replies, who knows)”

As a soldier who saw there was a problem with her leader, and wanted to secure a way for her side of the war to win, I’d say she’s in the right here. Rose’s half measures cost them so much and after it was all said and done she just kinda dicked around for thousands of years. Finally leaving Steven to clean up her messes. She was a terrible war leader, and I can definitely understand where someone would want her forcibly removed. 

#su critical #bismuth #lethal-cuddles #bismuth did nothing wrong #steven universe

[valiantvigilant]

Come Home, Please (Jason Todd x Reader)

I decided to start off my first imagine on here with a Jason x Reader because who doesn’t love Jason? I’m kinda nervous about posting my work considering I haven’t posted any of my writing since my edgy middle school days lmao. Hopefully, it’s gotten better! Well, here goes nothing!

____ It was going to storm in Gotham tonight, per the usual. However, the rain hadn’t started to fall yet. Only the thunder and lightning crackle above, and at any given moment, the sky’s water works could begin. (Y/N) was doing patrol alone tonight. As (Y/H/N) (your hero name) you have saved many people in Gotham. Many villains feared an encounter with you almost as much as they feared The Bat, your mentor. You were his second protégé, after Dick Grayson. You didn’t have the greatest life before Bruce took you in. Your parents died when you were young, and having to make due for yourself on the streets of Gotham isn’t a child’s ideal lifestyle. However, Bruce found you and took you in. You had just saved a lady from being robbed when your 12 year old self beat the living shit of the criminal. And thats when Bats came and your life just went up from there. Not too long after he had brought you in from your grimy life on the streets, he had scooped up him. Jason Todd. He became Robin and you were (Y/H/N.) The three of you worked like a well oiled machine. All of that changed when he died. When your best friend, your other half, the love of your life, died. That was a long time ago. Your Jaybird was dead and that was that. You…never really healed from that. It scarred you. Oh, how you wanted to kill Joker. There isn’t a day that goes by that you don’t want to kill him and send his rancid soul to the pits of hell for what he did to Jason. You two were ever so in love. No one had ever seen two people more fit for each other than (Y/N) (L/N) and Jason Todd. Everyone knew just by the looks you two gave each other that you two were going to last a lifetime. But sometimes in life, things change. Jason Todd, was supposed to be dead. He has been for five long years. Until recently that is. You remembered when you walked down the steps to the Batcave and you saw Bruce hunched over the computer, his forehead resting against his hands that were folded in front of him. You swiftly made your way to his side, placing the mugs of hot chocolate you had brought down for the both of you, down. “Bruce, is everything alright?” You asked, worry evident in your voice. He looked up at you, his cowl was down, revealing tired blue eyes. Those eyes only flicked up to the computer screen in which you saw it. All of the evidence that proved Jason Todd was alive and was now going by Red Hood. Your (e/c) hues widened as you scanned every bit of information on that screen. You clenched your jaw and took a seat, your body shaking with anger and shock. No, no, no. This can’t be real! This cannot be true! He was dead. Gone. You felt his corpse and how cold to the touch his skin was. That body was bloody and broken. It couldn’t possibly be him. Could it? After a bit of denial and a few hours of viewing the facts over and over, you came to except it. The fact that your once dead boyfriend, the man who plagued your dreams at night and your thoughts in the day was alive! He didn’t even say anything to you… You listened calmly as Bruce explained everything. Though, nothing in the explanation was a good enough excuse for Jason not to see you. You had shed tears for him, worked yourself to become stronger so you didn’t lose anyone else, in honor of him. You even used his mask as part of your uniform. Everything you did since he died was in memory of the man you loved. You decided to confront him yourself a couple months after the incident between him and Bruce. You had clung on to a bit of hope that he would confront you at some point, but it never happened. So you decided to take matters into your own hands, keeping Bruce’s warning in mind as your ran the rooftops of Gotham. “He isn’t the same man you remember Y/N. He is…different. Stay alert.” And here you were, typing away at your hologlove (The computer built into the wrists of Batman’s suit and Robin’s as well. It’s in Young Justice if you’ve ever seen it lol) You had gotten a few tips from people in Crime Alley were The Red Hood just might be, and now you had a lock on his location. Smirking, you followed the red dot on the screen that was Jason. Eventually you finally caught up with him. He hasn’t lost his swiftness, that’s for sure. You closed out the computer on your wrist once you made it to the same rooftop as him. You were fast and stealthy. You his behind the roof door of the building and you watched as he loaded the guns he uses for weapons. You put your hand on your hip, double checking that (w/o/c) (wepon of choice) is still strapped to your hip. You took a deep breath and closed your eyes for a moment. This was it. You would be reacquainted with the man who still has your heart. Opening your masked eyes you peek your head out one more time and see that he isn’t standing there anymore. You’re about to pull up your hologlove when you sense him. Behind you! Your instincts screamed and you flipped out of the way just as bullets came spitting at you. You tugged the hood of your cloak further over your head so it shielded your face as you dodged and got a good distance away. “Who the hell are you?!” He demanded, stepping into the moonlight to face your cloaked figure. “I know you’ve been following me. What do you want?” His voice was full of bitterness and scorn. He had gotten a hell of a lot taller than you remember. His voice was rougher and his face was covered by that red helmet. You longed to see those seafoam green eyes of his under there. “You have ten seconds before I start shooting again and blow your fucking brains out!” Your lips curl into a smug smile and a laugh escapes you. Faster than he could process, you reach down to the straps on your calves and pull out the pair of escrima sticks that Dick had made for you. (W/o/c) would give it away who you were, so you decided to use these. Jason was fast, but not fast enough. He shot at you once more, but you were faster. You quickly knocked the guns out of his hands and sent them skidding across the rooftop. He let out a growl before sliding out a knife. “I’m going to ask you again, who are you?!” “I’m surprised you haven’t notice by now Jason,” you replied. He gripped his knife tighter. “You’ve gotten stronger, faster, smarter. But so have I.” Your voice was a low snarl, and you felt your anger and hurt start to fill your gut. You yanked your hood down and revealed your face. Rage was etched into your features and you were pretty sure your knuckles were white with how hard you were gripping the escrima sticks. “(Y-Y/N)?” He questioned. “Who else would be able to disarm you that quick?” You snap back, meaning for it to be a joke, but it sure as hell didn’t sound like one. “Nice mask (n/n),” he said slyly, putting his knife away. You take a few steps towards him and rip it off, showing your blazing (e/c) eyes. He got captivated in them, just as he did the moment he met you. The pools of (e/c) were enough to calm his racing heart. Partially. You were angry. You were beyond angry. You were seething. Perhaps he should have visited you. Said something to you…but why should he? He thought to himself, you kept Joker alive. You didn’t do anything to avenge him! (Or so he believed.) “You can have it back,” you snarl, throwing the mask at him and it flutters to the ground. “Did Bruce send you after me? I thought for sure you would be with Golden Boy if you did come.” “I came on my own accord Jaybird.” He felt his stomach drop as you said this. He normally hated when anyone besided you and Roy called him that. All the times that you said it with love and care in your voice raced through his mind. Now, you said it with clear agitation. “Why?” He says, his voice came out…softer than he imagined. He cursed himself for it. “Why? I came out here to find you, so I can finally see you after thinking you were dead. And, all you can ask me is why?! Why do you think I came to find you Jason? So I can fight you?” You say the last two lines with sarcasm dripping off each syllable. He stays quiet. “I thought you were gone…and now Bruce tells me you are alive. I had to find out for myself if it was true.” “Well sweetheart, as you can see, I’m alive. Fucked up from the Lazarus Pit, but alive!” He replied with an equal amount of sarcasm. You had gotten your anger towards him under control and you were ready to talk to him about why you really came here. Putting your escrima sticks away, you began to speak again. “I know you are different now Jay, but-” “Different?” He said, laughing coldly. “I’m beyond different (Y/N). I’ve decided that just putting the scum you and Bruce capture, in jail, isn’t enough. My little experience taught me that. The only way is to terminate them.” “That isn’t right and you know it,” you respond sternly. “Don’t you see what happens when you keep them alive?! You kept him alive. You and Bruce. And look what happened (Y/N) I was killed.“ Jason spat out. “I thought if not him, than you would do it. That you would kill Joker. He took me from you (Y/N). Me. And you didn’t do a fucking thing about it!” “Don’t you dare say that,” you replied, in a low growl. “I was going to do it. I had him on the brink of death, but Dick and Bruce had to pull me off him. But with the adrenaline, rage and tears, I slipped from their grip before they had to get Clark to hold me back. So don’t you fucking dare say that I never did anything about it. I almost lost myself because he took you from me.” Tears were forming in your eyes now as you stood before your once dead lover. You took a deep breath to get your emotions in control before you said something you would regret. “I’m not asking you to kill Penguin, or Scarecrow, or Riddler, or any of those other bastards. This is Joker, (Y/N). He has done the worst out of all of them, he is lower than a pile of shit on the food chain. He is unexplainably dispicable and you choose to keep him alive, even after he took me from you. Clearly I didn’t mean enough to you!” “You won’t ever get it, will you?” You retort, your voice getting bolder. “I love you Jason. I always have and always will. But I can’t kill him. The hatred for Joker will always linger, but I learned to rid it from my heart because I won’t allow myself to be corrupted by him. I won’t let that son of a bitch get to me anymore. For a long while, he had a hold of my mind and I don’t even think he realized it! But the past two and a half years…I learned to let go of my poison because I had to go back to what I was trained to do. Saving people. I couldn’t save you Jason…and I’m sorry. I am so, so sorry. I took that, the pain and tears, he blood and sweat that came with losing you and I made myself stronger. So I could do better and save more lives. For you. So don’t you say I didn’t do anything, that you weren’t in my heart, or that I didn’t care. Because everything I’ve ever done since you’ve been gone, was done with you in my mind. You are in my daydreams and my night-thinking. You will always be in my heart because that’s what I chose to keep there, not the toxins that Joker had implanted.” You were breathing heavily after your speech as you reached down and picked up his old mask, pocketing it. Then, you walked towards him and he shrunk back a bit. Jason wasn’t quite sure what he was feeling. The bitterness he felt had melted away at your words. You had always had that effect on him. Your very presence was enough to sooth his aching soul. He felt a lump form in his throat as you walked closer and he slid back a bit. Your words had struck something in him and he realized that he wanted you. That he needed you. He wanted to be enveloped by your arms and never leave them. He felt like…like such a child in this moment. He had just yelled at his love, the girl he had loved practically all his life and surprisingly she still hasn’t given up on him. If he were you, he would have left a long time ago. You were just a few inches from him now, and you reached up to his helmet and put your hands to it and pulled it off, revealing his face. His eyes however, were concealed by another mask. You internally rolled your eyes at this. Only Jason would be that extra that he needed a mask under his mask. He had a white tuft of hair that was part of his bangs. You could only assume that the Pit left him with that trauma streak. Your slim fingers took hold of the corner of the domino mask and peeled it off, finally showing you the brilliant shade of seafoam green that were his eyes. You put a hand to his cheek, and gave him a warm smile. That’s what broke him. He scooped you up in his arms and held you tightly, breathing in your scent. Oh God, how he missed you. His heart yearned for you and here you were, back in his arms where you belonged. He felt his eyes well up with tears and yours did the same. This time, you let them fall as you clung to each other. You felt your shoulder become damp and you tangled a hand in his hair. You pulled back slightly and he turned, trying to wipe the tears from his face so you wouldn’t see them. “Jason,” you began. “Will you come home? Please?” He took a deep breath and nodded as he cupped your face in his large hands. You let a few more salty pearls escape and he wiped them away. Furthermore, just like how it was five years ago, he pressed his lips to yours. It seemed ethereal. For this, this hadn’t happened in what felt like a millenium. You supposed, things like that, will never change. ____ Well, that’s the end of my first imagine on here! I’m really excited to write more of these, so please, send in requests!! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed!

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