colourfulmes - Tumblr blog

colourfulmes · 16 hours

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I just wanted to say that the header(?) to the natewantstobattle tag perfectly matches what Nate's feeling right now.

@colourfulmes

#LETS GOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!#natewantstobattle #nwtb #youtube

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colourfulmes · 2 days

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Okay the director's cut of the retirement is really helpful, but it is long. I was wondering a lot about the catalogue sale and what it means in the practical, so here are some highlight points!

Nate doesn't want people to change their listening habits, because he already very much got the bag for it

His music is unlikely to be removed from any platforms (though theoretically Nate doesn't have control over that anymore. But literally, having it up is the reason the buyer bought it)

He only sold only his share of the music. The shares of guest vocalists, Shawn's share on production, etc. still go to their respective owners, so the music still supports it's creators

Not all songs were included in the deal, mostly for practical back end reasons

He also owns everything from To Let Go onwards and anything he releases in the future

Physical releases still support him, and the planned vinyl releases are still happening

The online instrumental sales will be discontinued as those aren't his revenue anymore

The songs may now be licensed out through the connections that the buyer has (so, they may show up in video games, movies, etc. that they wouldn't have before), or show up in other ways to promote it. This has to be run by Nate first, though he's not in control of it

This won't affect tours or the catalogue he can perform (but he's not planning on touring)

New music will still happen, but only on his terms. Might not happen under the name NateWantsToBattle

Currently no details on if his music can be used for streaming backgrounds, etc. but tetchnically he should have control over this

Nate got the value he wanted out of the deal

Covers are still allowed (though yt content ID system is still gonna fuck you over, and the owner might have some differing policy stuff)

Give Heart Records is moving forwards already and Nate will still be working on stuff there

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colourfulmes · 2 days

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Oh wow! Good for him! It’s impossible to say “good for you” without sounding sarcastic, but I mean it. I’m happy for him!

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colourfulmes · 2 days

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Now Tell Me, What Was I to You?

@nwtbobsessedemo @colourfulmes @bondoes-art

Title From: Nothing to Me by NateWantsToBattle

Fandom: Youtuber Egos

AU: None

A/N: I got really inspired and motivated to write, so here! Have this! I really like it tbh and am excited to hear feedback! Also, I’m NOT shipping Natemare and Nate, I just wanted to play around with the dynamic I guess? Idk-

Content Warnings: Graphic violence, mutilation, self-harm, torture, psychological manipulation, emotional abuse, trauma, blood, injury, gore, disturbing imagery, psychological distress, dependency

----------------------------------------

Despite the wide, near skin-tearing grin on his face, Natemare was anything but happy right now.

The man that had been his host for nearly a full decade had been having… an increasing amount of defiant thoughts.

Natemare knew because he shared a body and mind with Nathan. But Nate didn’t get any say in what Natemare did with his body.

He was just a passenger, and frankly, Natemare didn’t want the human gone. It was nice to have constant company.��

Natemare stared at the ground of the alleyway, and then he blinked. He opened his eyes to the inky darkness that was his and Nate’s mind, if you could call it that.

Nate could still see out of his eyes if he wished to, but for the past three years or so he’d been in their mind more than ever, closed off.

Natemare looked around, and saw Nate lying on the ground with his eyes closed and his hands resting on the back of his head.

Natemare walked over to the resting singer, and grabbed him by his jacket, roughly pulling him up to his feet.

Nate opened his eyes, which were filled with confusion and fear. Natemare’s wide grin returned, and this time it actually did split the skin. The being’s lower jaw looked like it could fall off. Then it attached to his face again, the skin healing.

“What the fuck?!” Nate exclaimed, his voice shaky. He was trembling. “W-Whatever I did, I-I’m sorry-“

Natemare held a finger up to Nate’s lips, and Nate stopped talking instantly. Natemare purposefully didn’t speak yet to let Nate’s fear grow.

“You know exactly what you did, Nate. You know exactly what you thought,” Natemare said, “And it-“ he laughed, “It pisses me off, it does! I-I mean, you thought you wanted to leave me! T-To force me out!”

Nate shook his head no, his eyes firmly shut. “I didn’t, please, it just one passing thought, I would never, I let you in, it was my decision! I earned this!”

“Just because it was one little thought doesn’t excuse the fact that YOU HAD IT! IT DOESN’T MATTER, NATE! Y-You.. you…” The being trailed off, starting to tear up.

“I-I can’t handle abandonment! I can’t! I… it… please don’t leave me,” Natemare said, crying. “Please! You’re my h-host, I need you! After a-a ten year bond with someone, it isn’t easy for me to just LET GO!” The fear embodiment sighed.

Nate sighed as well, and slightly smiled. That smile quickly disappeared when Natemare grabbed either side of Nate’s face. Their fingers were tipped with very long and very sharp purple claws.

Natemare pressed his claws into the sides of Nate’s face, blood starting to trickle out from the small wounds.

“You don’t get to just think that, have one little conversation and just think that’s the end of it.” Natemare said, sniffling. He took one hand off Nate’s bleeding face to wipe his tears, then put it back.

He increased his grip, his claws tearing into the skin. Nate let out a scream, but it wasn’t the most painful one he could muster. Natemare wanted that.

Natemare let go of Nate, and then waved his hand slightly. The darkness that surrounded them morphed to stab Nate in the wrists and ankles, lifting the man up.

Nate still screamed, but he was beginning to get quieter.

“No no no! That’s not what I want,” Natemare said in a sing-song type voice. “You’re gonna be in soooo much pain for what you did.”

“I said I was sorry!” Nate screamed. Natemare got closer, and tapped Nate’s nose. He breathed in and out deeply, smiling again.

“That doesn’t matter.” He said. “Now… I want you to scream for me. Loudly. Let me know that it hurts.”

He slowly put a claw up to his right shoulder, then looking at Nate. The man stopped screaming, and was frozen in terror, his eyes wide.

Natemare dug his claw into its shoulder, deep, and began to drag it down his arm, making a long and painful slash. His blood looked like a beautiful mix of molten gold and amethyst.

Nate once again started screaming, and the same exact gash appeared on his arm, identical to what Natemare was doing to himself. Nate’s wound was deep, and he thrashed around where he was.

“See? It still works. We’re still tied together, even in pain, even in our injuries, Nate,” he said. “This is proof that you can’t leave me yet.”

Natemare stopped with the gash on his arm, and brought his hands and claws up to his throat. He plunged them deep into his flesh, and opened six long cuts on his throat.

The same ones appeared on Nate, whose screaming had stopped as he was currently too preoccupied with choking on his own blood to do so.

Natemare’s tears had long since dried over the markings on their face. He was done with the crying for now. This was just him letting out his anger.

These primal feelings of rage, sadness, hopelessness- all over some human the parasitic entity was using as his host. He didn’t know any other ways to deal with them.

It stepped closer to Nate, who was lowered slightly. It bent down in a way that would’ve broken a normal human’s spine to look at Nate’s expression, which was the best thing it’d seen today. It was pained, tired, fearful- exquisite.

Natemare laughed. “You should see the look on your face! Holy shit this is- t-this is so good! Y’know, I was feeling all sad and sappy and shit about you wanting to leave me, and now I feel much better. But I… I am not done yet, Sharp.”

The human looked at Natemare, unable to move. Natemare trailed its claws over Nate’s body, and then dug them firmly into his back.

He tore into it, tearing out large chunks of flesh and bone, reveling in his host’s pained, choked out screams and sobs.

He continued to dig into and tear out Nate’s back and insides, until there was a large gaping hole where his stomach was.

Natemare hummed in approval, and then put the claw of an index finger on the back of Nate’s neck, and carved into it with precise measurements.

When he was done, the initials ‘NM’ were carved onto the back of Nate’s neck.

He walked to the front of the singer, and then he was let go from the shadows impaling his wrists and ankles. Nate fell to the floor, still unable to move, but he was able to sob.

Natemare got closer, and sat down on the floor himself.

“Oh, oh no- did you get hurt badly? I’m so sorry, Nate… I-I hope you can forgive me!” He said, feigning innocence with a concerned expression. “Did you really expect me to let you get away with thinking about leaving me? I told you… one little conversation wouldn’t be the end of it.”

He gently grabbed Nate, and pulled him into his arms. Nate’s eyes turned to look at Natemare’s own, fearful and pained still.

“Do you want to be healed? Quicker than it would usually take after one of our sessions like this?” Natemare asked. Immediately, Nate started nodding, despite the immense pain he was in from everything.

Natemare smiled softly, and snapped his fingers. Nate’s injuries, including his slashed up throat, shoulder and the hole completely through his chest, slowly started to heal and grow back.

After a moment, it was as if there were never any injuries to begin with. Nate let out a loud, content sigh. He was too weak right now to try to force himself out of Natemare’s grip.

“Are you g-gonna think of leaving me again? S-Seriously consider expelling me from your body?” Natemare asked a second question to the exhausted Nate. He was already tearing up again, damn it.

Just the thought of his host for ten years rejecting him and expelling him made his mind start to race and made him hyperventilate.

“N-No, I won’t.. no,” Nate said weakly. Natemare now let a genuine, real smile cross his face. He hugged Nate tightly, and just stayed there.

He’d never go.

Not if his life depended on it.

#THEWOODS POSTED ANOTHER ANGSTY BANGER GUYS OH GOD #chills though i love this holy moly #natewantstobattle #nwtb #natewantstobattle egos #natemare nwtb

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colourfulmes · 3 days

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HES FUCKING FREE!!!!!!

HE'S FREE

AS HIS HEART ALWAYS BE

AND THAT DESERVES A RECORD

#natewantstobattle #nwtb #nathan sharp #nwtb fanart #natewantstobattle fanart #natewantstobtl #nathan sharp fanart #THIS IS ABSOLUTELY GORGOUS OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS #THE COLOURS <33333

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colourfulmes · 4 days

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Nate right now:

#natewantstobattle #nwtb #nathan sharp #meme #rambles

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colourfulmes · 4 days

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Okay, I watched the video and I'm currently watching the stream and personally, good for him! He seems so happy with the progression he's going and I'm glad about that!!

I'm happy he's taking a hiatus from music or Natewantstobattle, he deserves the break from grinding DSJSDKJ

also HELLO?? I'm 1000% supporting future projects he has working on and I am absolutely supporting his endeavours on what he does!!

I'm just glad he's in a good space :]

I JUST OPENED TUMBLR, WHATS THIS ABOUT NATE RETIRING???

I HAVENT WATCHED THE STREAM/VIDEO YET MY ASS KINDA JUST WOKE UP LMAO

#natewantstobattle #nwtb #nathan sharp #I'm so happy for him omg

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colourfulmes · 4 days

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I JUST OPENED TUMBLR, WHATS THIS ABOUT NATE RETIRING???

I HAVENT WATCHED THE STREAM/VIDEO YET MY ASS KINDA JUST WOKE UP LMAO

#natewantstobattle #nwtb #nathan sharp #HUUUUUUUUUH #can someone explain to me rq the fandom is trying not to explode rn/j