rhys-writes-some-shit

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

I finally watched S1 of Hazbin Hotel recently and now I've been absolutely obsessing over your queerplatonic Alastor fics! You write his character so amazingly well, it really scratches my brain in the best way possible!

Thank you!!! I've been really busy with life lately, so I haven't been able to write anything recently, but I really appreciate that people are still finding comfort in my writing!

#rhys-replies #hazbin hotel

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Your queer-platonic Alastor fics are AMAZING, just thought you should know if you don't already. There aren't many out there and yours are so well written 🫶

THANK YOU!! T-T

I literally said, "No QPR Alastor? Fine, I'll do it myself."

#rhys-replies #hazbin hotel

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

A Long-Awaited Conversation

Alastor x Reader (QP)

A/N: This was initially a very different fic, but I'm not upset with how it turned out. A little bit of angst to make the day better, right?

It was a slow day. Neither you nor Alastor had much to do, so the two of you were sitting in your room, just enjoying each other’s presence. Jazz was playing quietly from an old radio by Alastor, who was doing some paperwork. You were typing away on your laptop, much to Alastor’s dismay. At least it wasn’t VoxTek, he had to give you that. 

“Do tell me, my dear: when is a door not a door?” Alastor asked suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence. 

“Oh dear,” you sighed, knowing exactly what was coming. 

“Oh deer is right!” Alastor replied brightly. “Now then, when is a door not a door?”

Playfully rolling your eyes, you humored him. “I don’t know, Al. Do tell.”

“When it’s a jar!” 

You couldn’t deny the snort that the corny joke elicited. Alastor knew you enjoyed his jokes, but it had been a while since he’d gone out of his way to tell you any. 

“Well, maybe you know why the cemetery was so popular.” Alastor’s grin was bright and genuine. Setting your laptop aside, you focused on him, smiling fondly. 

“I’m afraid I don’t.”

“What a surprise! Didn’t you know people were just dying to get in?” Alastor proceeded to laugh at his own joke. 

“I missed this,” you said after a moment. “You were gone for seven years. I really missed this.”

The lighthearted mood turned serious. Alastor’s smile lost some of its light. “My sabbatical was… necessary, dearest. I do regret that you were unable to accompany me.” 

You noticed how the music was turned up a bit, masking the sound of your conversation. While it was doubtful anyone was listening in, you knew that Alastor wanted to cover his bases. 

“You didn’t even tell me you were leaving.” There was a clear edge in your voice. “I had no idea where you were or how long you’d be gone…” The anger, frustration, and sadness started bubbling in your chest, ready to overflow, out of control. “Seven years, Alastor! Seven fucking years, I didn’t know where you were! I thought you’d left me, Al! Or worse, you died!”

“Dearest,” Alastor tried, but you cut him off. 

“No, you don’t get to ‘dearest’ me,” you snapped. “I was alone for seven years. We’re partners, Al. We’re supposed to communicate with each other. I don’t even care what you were doing, I just wanted to know you were alright.” You paused. “Did it have to do with your deal?”

Alastor’s eyes narrowed. “How do you know about that?”

You matched his gaze. “Husk told me. He used to check on me weekly, you know. Thought I deserved to know. Which I did.”

“You don’t get to decide what I should and shouldn’t tell you,” Alastor said sharply. 

“No, but you should tell me when you’re going to abandon me!” You were shouting now, standing and staring him down. “You have no idea how much I struggled while you were gone, how much I suffered! You are everything to me, Al! You are my fucking world, and what the hell was I supposed to do when my world up and vanishes?!”

The sound of static filled the room, Alastor gripping the armrests of his chair, leaving deep claw marks. 

“I was a fucking mess! All your souls, all your territory, went to me! I’m not an Overlord, Al! I don’t want to be one! Having all that power scared the shit out of me! I was forced to do your job for you, a job I didn’t want to do!” Tears pricked at your eyes as the memories came back in full force. “And then you return suddenly, take up an impossible project, and just expect me to be okay with it? Well, I’m not okay with it! You haven’t been the same since you returned and you won’t fucking talk to me!”

You were gasping for breath when the tears started to fall. You messily wiped them away, still fuming with anger that had built up over the seven years you’d been alone. 

“Are you quite finished?” Alastor asked, his smile forced. Standing, his papers vanished, and tucked his arms behind his back. “Clean yourself up. I refuse to talk while you’re being hysterical.”

“Hysterical?! Hysterical?! What the fuck, Al?!” You yelled. “You are such a selfish, pretentious piece of shit!”

With a hum, Alastor disappeared into the shadows, causing you to scream in frustration. 

The jazz music had stopped. You were standing, alone, in your room, gasping for air as you stifled sobs. 

The day had been going so well. You had to go and fuck it up. 

Ten minutes later, you wandered to the lobby, still pissed off, but feeling a little better after crying the most you had in years. Silently, you took a seat at the bar. Husk was there, like always, and immediately started to make you your favorite drink

“Finally give him a piece of your mind?” Husk asked.

“That obvious?” Your voice was hoarse from the shouting.

“I could hear the screaming.” Husk gestured up. “Also, you look like shit, and the last time I saw you like this, it was also about him.”

The drink was placed in front of you, but you just massaged your temples. “I don’t know why I put up with him.”

Husk grabbed a bottle and drank it straight, whatever it was. “Love fucking sucks.”

You sighed, “Husk, we’ve been over this, I don’t love people like that.”

“Sure, maybe not romantically. But you still love him. And it still fucking sucks.”

“That's something, coming from you.” You took a drink, reveling in how the alcohol warmed your body. “Don't think I don't see how you look at Angel.” 

Husk glared deeply at you, not denying it. You smirked, taking another drink. 

“How do I get him to understand?” You asked quietly, half to yourself. “He’s so fucking narcissistic, I bet he didn’t even think twice about leaving me behind.”

“I couldn’t tell ya’.” Husk shrugged. “I will say, though, that you’re the only person who can actually get through to him. You have that power over him.”

You scoffed. “Like Hell I do.”

“If anyone else speaks to him like you do, they’re dead before they get a chance to think.” Shelving his drink, Husk began to busy himself behind the counter, cleaning some glasses. “Last I checked, you were still kicking.”

Silent, you contemplated Husk’s words. He had a point. If Alastor cared about anyone, it was you. Finishing your drink with another sigh, you stood. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. You had to finish this. 

“Stick to your guns, kid,” Husk assured. You didn’t have the heart to tell him you’re probably older than him. 

“Thanks, Husk. See you soon.” 

You remained quiet as you walked up to Alastor’s radio booth. Out of respect for his boundaries, you hardly ever went up there, but this was important. Radio static filled the air the closer you got, confirming that he was indeed in his booth, but the lack of his voice told you he wasn’t recording. 

Before you even got the chance to knock, Alastor’s shadow opened the door for you. 

“You can come in.”

Alastor was hunched over his desk, writing notes on what was likely a script for an upcoming radio show. His recording booth was a mess, with papers scattered all over the place and claw marks littering every piece of furniture that wasn’t nailed down. The feeling of Alastor’s radio static was heavy, but barely audible as Alastor wrote.

“I would apologize for shouting, but I don’t really feel sorry,” you opened with, arms crossed. 

“As you shouldn’t,” Alastor agreed, not even turning towards you. “I will say, I’m surprised you stopped when you did. I’d expected you to go on for much longer.”

You couldn’t help but snort at that remark. “Oh, trust me, there were many versions of that conversation where I went on for about half an hour.” You left out saying that you had seven years to formulate them, thinking that would only make the situation worse.

“I don’t doubt you.” After a moment, Alastor sighed, setting down his pen and sitting back in his chair. You can see the reflection of his face in the glass. His smile is still there, but barely, and his eyes seem tired. Husk was right, you did make an impression.

Alastor turned towards you, leaning his head into one hand while he tapped his fingers along his microphone staff. He still never met your eyes. “You… are correct.”

Silent, you waited for Alastor to continue, watching him closely. 

“I should not have left you without saying anything. I regret not speaking with you before I left.” You could tell he was struggling to get his words out. Emotions were hard for him, be it by nature or by choice, so you remained patient. “I left… to keep you safe.”

Hoping your surprise wasn’t evident on your face, you found a chair and pulled it up in front of him. The tension in your shoulders lessened when Alastor took your hand, holding it gently. 

“Had I not taken my absence, you would’ve been in danger. Danger I’d be unable to protect you from. I could not take that chance.” Alastor finally looked up at you. He was still guarded, still holding himself back, but there was something warm in the way he looked at you. A soft side, that only you had the privilege to see. “If something happened to you, I would be unable to live with myself. So I left, because it was the only way to ensure you would remain safe.”

A hand reached up and grazed your cheek, wiping away a tear you hadn’t even realized was on your face. 

“It was the only way, my darling. I wish it hadn’t come to that. And I am ashamed that I hurt you so much in my absence.”

You were at a loss for words. Alastor had never, never, opened himself up like that. It was a little scary. Part of you wished he’d just brushed off the argument and pretended it had never happened. At least that would’ve matched what you’d expected. This… this was not at all what you’d expected. 

Blinking, your heart rate picked up against your will. “Al, I… Th-thank you for the apology, I… This… is scaring me, Al. You’re scaring me. Are you okay? This isn’t like you.”

Alastor’s hand left your face. “You are correct in saying that I am not the same man I once was. I continue to hope I will revert back to who I was, but I can see now that that’s impossible. You, dearest, are the only thing making that revelation bearable.” 

As your heart beat against your chest, you struggled to evaluate your next move. You wanted to scramble away, to beg for the old Alastor back, but you knew that wasn’t the right move. You knew this was the actual, real Alastor in front of you and not some sort of imposter. The idea that the old Alastor had vanished the day you were left on your own did not sit well with you. Frankly, it made you sick. 

But now was not the time. Right now, Alastor needed you, as fucked up as it seemed. 

Exhaling forcefully, you took hold of Alastor’s hands this time. “Thank you for coming back. Whatever it is that’s going on, we’ll deal with it together. Like always. I’m your partner, Al, and I’m not leaving anytime soon, got it?”

Alastor nodded, closing his eyes for a second. When he opened them again, his spark had returned. His smile grew once more and he stood, pulling you to his chest. 

“Well! Now that that’s settled, how about a dance, my dear? It has been quite a while since we’ve had the chance to cut a rug together.”

With the snap of Alastor’s fingers, some jazz filled the room and the disheveled furniture was shoved against the ways to make room. Mustering your own smile, you placed your hand in his and allowed him to lead you around the room in time with the music.

It was nice to dance, you had to admit, but the abrupt change left a bad feeling in your stomach. Something was not right. In fact, something felt wrong. But now was not the time for that. Hiding behind your smile as skillfully as Alastor himself, you went along with his antics. 

But the sinking feeling of dread remained.

#hazbin hotel #alastor #hazbin hotel fanfiction #alastor the radio demon #alastor x reader #rhys-writes #alastor x reader queerplatonic #hazbin hotel alastor #2k words what am I on? #wrote instead of doing my hw again oops #alastor has a mental breakdown off screen #queerplatonic #queerplatonic x reader

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Could've sworn someone asked for an Alastor x Anxious!Reader fic a while ago, but I can't seem to find the ask... Oh well! Here's something I whipped up really quick!

Alastor x Anxious!Reader Headcanons (Queer-Platonic)

💔 Alastor probably wouldn’t understand your anxiety at first, considering the time period he lived in before he died. 💔 It would also take him a while to notice any outward signs. He’d probably sign it off as a “quirk” or something before he realizes it causing you actual emotional harm. 💔 If you tell him about it, he’d probably brush it off before doing a little retroflection and research once you’re out of sight. 💔 “That sounds like a bit of exaggeration, dearest, perhaps you’re over-reacting?” Proceeds to frantically look for a book about helping people with anxiety while you cry yourself to sleep 🙃 💔 Once he’s well-read, he starts taking mental note of any trigger or outward symptom you display, no matter how small. 💔 He won’t really do much unless things get bad or if he can tell you’re close to a panic/anxiety attack. 💔 Then he’ll gently pull you aside so you can calm yourself down. 💔 He’s not very good at coaching you through breathing exercises, but he’ll occasionally reassure you that he’s there and he’s willing to wait for you. 💔 Then, if he’s feeling generous, he’ll hug you before leaving and acting like nothing happened. 💔 If Alastor is anything, it’s subtle. 💔 He won’t tell anyone about your anxiety, nor does he expect anyone else to know. 💔 If you’re in a situation you can’t leave, he’ll put a hand on your arm, reassuring you that he realizes and is there for you. 💔 He’s never confirmed it, but you’re almost positive he can hear your heartbeat and can tell when it picks up. He’s typically at your side before you have to say anything, even if you’re masking your symptoms. 💔 All in all, Alastor is never the most sympathetic or outwardly helpful, but he does care in his own way.  💔 And once you realize it, it’s hard to miss. 💔 Now Alastor just hopes that no one ever notices he cares, or else he’ll have to kill them, and no one wants that. (That’s a lie, he sort of does).

#hazbin hotel #alastor #hazbin hotel fanfiction #alastor the radio demon #alastor x reader #alastor x reader queerplatonic #hazbin hotel alastor #rhys-writes #gn reader #anxiety #bruh its so hard to write soft!alastor bc he has the capacity he just doesnt care

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Hello!!! I just found your blog and I wanted to say as someone who is also aroace your Alastor QP fics are a godsend! Your writing is really good and I’ve enjoyed your content a bunch❤️❤️❤️

AAHHH all these compliments are making me so happy >_< I've been kinda stressed with midterms and my extracurriculars, so the compliments help so much. I'm so glad my writing is reaching other people <3 thank you so muchhhh

#rhys-replies

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

I love your queer platonic alastor fics so much!! As an aromantic person these make me so happy and everytime I see something written by you I shake and then explode from joy!!! >_<

Aalsldfhlajdakf thank youuuuu <3

but plz don't explode, I don't want to get charged for murder /lhj

#rhys-replies

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Okay, I found a work around but seriously wtf

brb sobbing (/nsrs)

OKAY HOW TF DO I GET YELLOW TEXT BACK??? MY FORMATTING IS MESSED UP NOW 😫

Like I can't find the yellow option on desktop or mobile 😭 wtffff

#rhys-remarks

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

OKAY HOW TF DO I GET YELLOW TEXT BACK??? MY FORMATTING IS MESSED UP NOW 😫

Like I can't find the yellow option on desktop or mobile 😭 wtffff

#rhys-remarks

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

I love your writing! It's funny and a joy to read through! I especially love that it's Queer-Platonic. I'm okay reading all the romance that everyone else is writing if only cause I like these characters and others write so well, but QP makes me bounce off the walls.

Take care of yourself!

This makes me so happy!! Thank you!!!!

I wish I could upload more just because no one else really writes QPRs on here, but I do what I can. Comments like these are what keep me writing. It makes me so happy to see others enjoy what I write.

Take care of yourself, too!!

#rhys-replies

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Could I please request Alastor seeing his QP partner attacking/distracting Adam during the finale so that he could get away, and maybe some angst of Alastor knowing he can't go and help them in his near death condition, and not knowing if they're dead or alive. Spoiler they're fine you don't become close with the Radio Demon without being some sort of badass.

Sorry if this is too specific, I hope you're having a good day.

I sort of combined this one with @meefy's request (this one). It doesn't totally match the asks, so I apologize. I threw this together between classes a bit hastily, so sorry if the pacing or writing seems off.

Yeah, Reader is a little OP. Oh well.

May or may not write a continuation where Al takes care of Reader's injuries...

TW: Canon-typical violence

Let Me Help You

Alastor x Reader (QP)

There were suddenly angels fucking everywhere. Gold ichor mixed with deep red in pools on the ground. Alastor’s shield had shattered. It hadn’t even been ten minutes, and the shield was gone. 

You tried to look for Alastor on the roof, anything to show he was alright. A flash of green followed by the distinct sight of Alastor’s tentacles helped soothe your worrying, turning back to the fight at hand. He’d be okay. He was one of the most powerful demons in Hell, he had to be okay. 

Regardless, you started to fight your way to the roof, cutting angels down left and right. Your prowess in battle had started to show through, dodging expertly before retaliating effortlessly. But there were so many of them. 

The numbers became overwhelming. Angel after angel started flanking you at every angle. You were trying to keep your eye on Alastor, but you kept nearly tripping over corpses instead. An angelic spear grazed your cheek, causing you to lash out, knocking back the growing crowd before tearing them apart one by one.

A terrible sinking feeling developed in your stomach, causing your focus to go straight up. With a flash, you teleported yourself to the roof. Alastor was half-transformed, a sinister grin filling his face while his signature tentacles framed his figure.

Adam, the first man himself, was in the air, brandishing a weapon resembling a guitar.

“--Cuz radio is fucking dead!” Adam shouted, as a bright flash of light caused you to shield your eyes. 

The moment the light subsided, your eyes widened in shock. 

“What just happened?” Alastor looked around frantically, locking eyes with you before seeing his cane in his hands, snapped in half. “Fuck.”

Neither of you saw Adam fly back down, swinging his weapon down. Alastor fell back into the ground, blood dripping from a huge gaping wound in his chest.

“Alastor!” You cried, running over to stand in front of him. Staring Adam down, your face pulled into a snarl. “You motherfucker!” Adrenaline coursing through your veins, you lunged at the angel.

 

Using your lightning-fast reflexes to your advantage, you managed to dodge any attack Adam sent your way. You narrowly missed getting obliterated multiple times, but what matters is that Adam’s focus is on you. Stealing a quick glance back at where Alastor was leaning against the wall, the huge gash in his chest slowly soaking his shirt with blood, you saw him melt into the shadows while glaring heavily at Adam with his ever-present smile. 

“Oh no,” Adam mocked. “Did I just kill your boyfriend?”

“Fuck you.” You focused all your anger, all your worry, into misdirecting Adam. At this point, you were just trying to keep him busy. Luckily, you’d learned some things during your time in Hell, thanks to Alastor. Keeping Adam running back and forth wasn’t that difficult, or at least you tried to keep telling yourself that. Maybe if you tired him out, or let the others focus on the horde of angels, it would help?

Where did Alastor even go? How were you supposed to find him when he just disappeared in thin air? Was he going to be okay? What would happen if he died? Would you do if he died?

Somehow, even though you were distracted, you kept dodging Adam’s attacks. The fatigue was growing on you, though. Adam was definitely not like the other angels. Any time you tried to attack him, he dodged or countered before you could react properly. His attacks were too strong for you to take head-on, which was why you were stuck dodging everything. 

“Now this is just fucking boring,” Adam groaned. With a movement of his fingers, you found yourself on the ground with a flash of light. A burning sensation ripped a pained cry from your chest as you doubled over, coughing up blood. 

Adam kicked your side for good measure, sending you careening off the building. “Fucking pussy.” 

You mustered a portal before you hit the ground, softening your fall as you rolled into your bedroom. It still hurt, pain causing your body to spasm. Dangerous-looking burns decorated the skin on the upper half of your body. While your vision faded in and out of focus, you tried to use some of your power to heal yourself as best you could. 

The pain eased just enough that you could focus on the matter at hand: finding Alastor. At this point, you couldn’t give a shit whether angels killed everyone in Hell or not. You needed to find your partner. You needed to find Alastor. 

Hands shaking, you mentally went through a checklist of every place in Hell you’d ever been to, trying to determine where he’d have gone. 

Almost like mockery, the old radio that sat on your desk crackled faintly. Of course! Where else would Alastor be but the one place he feels most in control. 

Rather than trying to make another portal, you picked yourself up off the floor and started walking. The hotel itself was abandoned, making it easy for you to traverse the halls without interruption. Your body ached as adrenaline started to wear off, but at least you could function. Who’s to say what Alastor was capable of. 

You cringed at the memory of his wound. Not only was it long, but it looked deep, with blood steadily leaking out. Alastor’s signature red outfit and his blood was not a good combo, you decided. Yes, it might match, but it was not right. 

It didn’t take long for you to get to the recording booth near the top of the hotel, carefully making sure you stayed out of sight. Your wounds healed little by little as you walked, your natural healing factor kicking in. A few well-placed deals, and your healing was nearly ten times as fast as a regular Sinner’s.

There was no need to knock, the door hanging from its hinges. The recording booth was in massive disarray. And in the center, leaning weakly in his chair, sat the man you were looking for. 

“Alastor.” You breathed a sigh of relief at seeing him still alive, but further inspection didn’t do much to help your nerves. His breathing was shallow, expression pained but somehow still holding a strained grin. 

“What are you doing here?” His voice was sharp. 

“Helping you, obviously,” you snapped in reply. There was no first aid kit nearby, so you just ripped sections of your jacket off, forcefully shoving the scraps onto Alastor’s still-bleeding chest. 

“I do not need your help,” he snarled back. Despite his words, he didn’t try to discard the fabric you were now pressing into his wound. 

When Alastor finched, you hesitated. You didn’t want to cause him any more pain, be it physical or emotional, but you knew he’d insist on trying to deal with everything himself. You were a similar way, but he’d also do the exact same thing you were doing if the situation were reversed. 

Gritting your teeth, you forcefully held the fabric to him as it slowly became blood soaked. “Summon a damn first aid kit.”

“I said–”

“I don’t fucking care.” You raised your head, meeting Alastor’s eyes so he knew you were serious. Was your voice shaking? Maybe. Were you scared? Most definitely. Was Alastor more important? Always. “Let me help you.”

Alastor visibly deflated, bringing a hand to his face. “Fine.” His voice was stiff, defiant. With a wave of his hand, a first aid kit appeared beside you. 

You were silent as you worked, now with actual medical supplies at your disposal. Any training you’d had while you were alive all came back to you while you attempted not to make the injury any worse than it already was. 

“I wasn’t sure if you were still alive,” Alastor admitted quietly after a few minutes. “Adam was much… more than I’d anticipated. I appreciate that you allowed me to retreat.”

Pausing, you looked Alastor up and down, possibly to see if he had a head injury as well. Never, in all your years, had Alastor ever said anything so kind to you. 

“What else would I do?” You shrugged. “Leave you to die? In your dreams, maybe. We’ve been friends for so many years, I’ve lost count. So of course I helped you, you stubborn asshole. A psychopathic angel is nothing if it means helping you.”

Alastor was silent for a moment. “If Adam had killed you…” The room filled with static, Alastor’s true demon form coming out ever-so-slightly. “I was prepared to burn all of Heaven to the ground.”

“Thanks for the sentiment, Al.” Your expression softened, unable to deny the smile that grew on your face. “Now, sit up so I can secure this gauze.”

Hours later, after the hotel had been rebuilt and you were prepared to act like Soft Alastor had never happened, an arm looped in yours. Alastor stood beside you, smiling down like always. 

“Come now, dearest. It’s time for supper!” 

Something about Alastor was different now. His expression was altered. He’d seemed more defensive in the aftermath of the battle, however, he seemed to do the exact opposite around you. 

It was subtle enough that only you (and maybe Rosie) would be able to tell. Luckily, for Alastor, you were perfectly content keeping your observations to yourself.

#hazbin hotel #alastor #hazbin hotel fanfiction #alastor the radio demon #alastor x reader #rhys-writes #rhys-replies #alastor x reader queerplatonic #hazbin hotel alastor

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Hello! Would you be willing to write silly Alastor x Reader (they’re dating) where he shows the reader around hell because she hasn’t experienced a lot of it? Thanks! I love ur work hehe it’s been keeping me sane 💕

Hi! Hello! Thank you for the request and I'm glad you're enjoying my work!

However! All my Alastor x Reader work is queer-platonic (not romantic), and I only with gender neutral readers. I'll keep this request in mind going forward, but because it doesn't match my vision for my work, I'm not promising anything.

But again! I'm glad you like my work!

#rhys-replies

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Hi! I just wanted to say that I am seeing the requests you guys are sending in! I'm not replying to them right away just so I don't flood my page, but I plan to start working on drafts as soon as I can. School and stuff is crazy, so writing hasn't been my top priority these last few days, but know that I am working on things!

Thank everyone for all your support. I had no idea people would love my work as much as you do, and I means so much to me that people enjoy it just as much as I do.

Have a good day y'all :)

#rhys-remarks #hazbin hotel fanfiction #helluva boss fanfiction

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Could I please request some poly headcanons with Asmodeus and Fizzarolli, maybe where reader is on the ace spectrum and a lot of people thinks it's weird that a demon is hanging around the literal lust demon, and not having sex with him.

GLADLY!!! I love poly!Fizzmodeus x Reader fics, thank you for giving me an excuse to write something for these two goofballs.

Poly!Fizzmodeus x Reader (Queer-Platonic)

💙You meet Fizz and Ozzie on accident, having been dragged along to Ozzie's club as a "+1"

💚 You only interact with Fizz once, but there was something about you that stood out to him.

💙 Maybe it was the fact that you were at a strip club and complimenting the choices of music and the skill of the dancers rather than getting off like everyone else.

💚 Regardless, after a few months of back and forth, you move in with Fizz and Ozz.

💙 They openly accept and support the fact that you're asexual, and never force you to do anything you're not comfortable doing.

💚 Their intimate relationship has nothing to do with the fact that both of them love to cuddle you into oblivion.

💙 It's not uncommon for people to give you shit online and in-person.

💚 People don't understand how you can be asexual, especially while living with the two biggest sex icons in Lust.

💙 Most people tend to assume you're trying to take advantage of Ozzie, or that you're just crazy.

💚 Fizz makes many public statements asking people to stop harassing you, but that doesn't really do anything.

💙 Only once Fizz and Ozz ganged up on a few demons who were hitting on you, did people really get the memo.

💚 Whether they understood or not, they realized that crossing you, meant crossing the King of Lust. And no one wanted to deal with that.

#helluva boss #helluva boss fanfiction #helluva asmodeus #helluva fizzarolli #fizzmodeus #fizzarozzie #fizz x ozzie #fizzmodeus x reader #asexual reader #queerplatonic #fizzmodeus x reader queerplatonic #rhys-writes #rhys-replies

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Hi! First of all love your writing and I hope you've had a great day so far. So im not aromantic but I personally love alastor, and I'd be pretty chill with an queerplatonic relationship, and i was wondering if like that's okay???? Cause like I had a friend who used to flip me off when asking this types of question so yeah just curious because i really love your blog and writing and I kinda feel guilty reading it thought since im not aromantic- AJSJHDOWF dont answer if you're not comfy with it though <3

Thank you for the question!

Of course you can enjoy my fics! They're for everyone! Also, you don't need to be aroace to be in a QPR or enjoy reading about QPR's, they're not exclusive or anything.

That is quite rude of your friend to brush you off for asking simple questions, but that's not my place.

Regardless, I'm so happy you like my content and I'd be overjoyed if you kept enjoying it.

I hope this answer is clear enough lol

#rhys-replies

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Alastor: My favorite pastime is to watch people with hopes and dreams slowly fall into despair upon realizing the true nature of their existance and lose all faith in their futures, but being forced to miserably trudge along upon the stage of life.

Me: Oh, man, have I got the place for you.

Me: Let me tell you about college, my friend.

#rhys-remarks #alastor #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #y'all life is rough #college #college is no joke

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

Thank you so much for the QP Alastor best friend Lucifer fic, I'm now so invested in reader and Lucifer's friendship so I was wondering if you could write some pure and fluff filled bestie headcanons on them. I feel like they would be such chaotic ride or die meanwhile Alastor and Charlie are both like, these two can never be left alone together.

I gotchu. Wrote these in 20 minutes, I'm going insane :)

Bestie Lucifer Headcanons

(ft. mentions of Alastor x Reader QPR)

🐤 You and Lucifer hit it off as BFFs right away.

🐤 You live for Lucifer's goofball energy and he uses your scemblance of responsibility to your advantage.

🐤 One time the two of you claimed be going out to advertise the hotel, but you really just put up a few fliers at Lu Lu World before going on all the rides at least twice.

🐤 Lucifer loves to send you pictures of ducks.

🐤 Similarly, you love to send Lucifer pictures of snakes.

🐤 bonus points for either of you if it's a Sinner demon or a stuffed animal.

🐤 Lucifer usually gets really depressed around the anniversary of Lilith leaving him, so you do everything in your power to help.

🐤 If he's locked himself in his room, you find a way in and make towers with his ducks.

🐤 if he's not communicating, you send him gifs until he replies, leading to entire conversations made up of gifs.

🐤 If you're ever not doing well and Al isn't around to cheer you up, Lucifer will take matters into his own hands.

🐤 He'll purposefully makes dad jokes because he knows they crack you up.

🐤 He'll watch TV with you into the early hours of the morning, no matter what it is.

🐤 If things are really bad, he'll even (begrudgingly) turn on Alastor's radio show for you, which always has a way of making you feel better.

🐤 The two of you are major cuddlers, so you're constantly snuggling with each other.

🐤 lots of hugs and the occasionally hand holding

🐤 It's gotten to the point where people think you've ditched the Radio Demon for the King of Hell, which has led to some very violent altercations.

🐤 Neither of you are allowed in the kitchen without Alastor or Charlie. Neither of you can cook. Both of you love cooking. Enough said.

🐤 On top of that, someone has to keep an eye on you when Alastor and Charlie are out of the hotel.

🐤 There was once an incident with trampolines that ended with a very stern lecture from Vaggie.

🐤 The two of you will get up to so many shenanigans, nobody can ever guess what will happen next.

🐤 As annoying as your friendship can be to them, Alastor and Charlie are both happy to see the two of you getting along.

🐤 (Even if Alastor wants to murder Lucifer where he stands from time to time)

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanfiction #alastor x reader queerplatonic #lucifer x reader #lucifer x reader platonic #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel headcanon #hazbin hotel alastor #at this point I don't know how I'm passing my classes #i'm going feral #ngl

[rhys-writes-some-shit]

The Dilemma of a Rubber Duck

Alastor x Reader (Queer-Platonic) ft. Bestie Lucifer

(TW: Mentions of depression, mentions of suicide attempts)

You knew Alastor didn’t like Lucifer. You weren’t 100% sure why, only that the King of Hell really got on Alastor’s nerves. Ever since Lucifer had moved into the hotel in the aftermath of the battle with the angels, Alastor had spent hours ranting and raving to you about him. They were constantly trying to one-up each other. It was comical, really.

Except that you were stuck in the middle of it. 

Unlike Alastor, you and Lucifer had hit it off right away, getting along like two peas in a pod. There was a certain camaraderie that came with being clinically depressed and still having to force a smile, which both you and Lucifer were experts at. Many late nights had been spent exchanging stories and finding humor in things other people might not otherwise find humorous. 

(“I tried to kill myself twice, and then end up getting hit by a car! That’s how I end up in Hell? What did I do all that work for?” That was the first time that story had been met with laughter, and that was when you knew Lucifer was a good guy.)

You were constantly thinking about how Alastor would react to knowing you enjoyed hanging out with Lucifer, or vice versa. It worried you to no end, so you tried to keep your friendship with Lucifer under wraps, for Alastor’s sake. He needed someone to back him up, and you wanted to be that person. You wanted Alastor to know he could trust you.

One evening, you and Lucifer were talking in the parlor, drinking tea. Alastor was out for a fancy Overlord meeting, so you were able to relax a bit. 

“I’m so glad we have Niffty around,” you were saying. “Sometimes I just can’t find the energy to do my laundry, but I know that if I leave it on the floor, she’ll take care of it right away.” You thought for a moment. “It’s not like I’m forcing her to do it. Or taking advantage of her. Right?”

“Nah, I thought cleaning was her job,” Lucifer reassured. “My loophole with that is all my outfits are the same. Also magic. Magic is very helpful.”

“Man, I’m jealous!” You gave a lighthearted groan. “I wish I could have magic like that.”

“Who’s saying you can’t?” Lucifer shrugged, sipping at his tea. 

You snorted. “Have you seen me? Do I look like Overlord material to you?”

“I didn’t think Mr. Crimson Asshole was an Overlord, so looks aren’t everything.” Lucifer hesitated. “Oh, shit, I shouldn’t have said it like that. You two are like, dating, right?”

You made a ‘fifty-fifty’ gesture with your hand. “Eh… Not really? It’s like… a mutual relationship. Neither of us are the ‘dating’ type, so we just kind of… vibe. But it’s fine, I get it. You should hear the things he says about you.”

“Oh?” Lucifer leaned forward, curious. You mimed zipping your lips, grinning playfully. “Alrighty then, keep your secrets.”

The feeling of guilt you’d been getting used to returned, but you smiled past it. If there was anything Alastor taught you, it was that you could hide everyone behind a smile. And it worked, for the most part. The only person who’d ever been able to see though it was Alastor himself. Similarly, you were the only person able to see through his ever-present smile.

Setting his cup down, Lucifer waited for a lull in the conversation. “Before I forget, I have something for you.” With a wave of his hand, a little yellow rubber duck appeared in his palm. Its features and markings made it resemble you. 

Eyes wide, you carefully took the duck from his hands like it were an actual duckling.

“This one doesn’t breathe fire or anything, but…” Lucifer paused, like he was struggling for words. “I haven't had a real friend in… a really long time. S-so I wanted to thank you. For that.”

You were at a loss for words. The only other person to get you gifts since you’d died had been Alastor. That feeling of guilt hit you like a train, but it was masked with a bright, grateful smile.

“Lucifer, I… I’m honored. Thank you.” You struggled to tear your eyes away from the duck. “Can I hug you?”

Instead of replying, Lucifer pulled you out of your chair, hugging you close. You matched it, hoping your appreciation for his existence was properly conveyed.

“Ahem.”

You and Lucifer pushed each other apart like a teenage couple caught making out. Alastor was standing in the entrance to the parlor, teeth bared. His grin was sharp, borderline violent, and his eyes were narrowed. 

“Al,” you tried, but no other words followed.

Then Alastor sighed, and the murderous look in his eyes disappeared. You were still holding the duck Lucifer had given you. Looking down, you realized you were shaking, and felt a little faint. 

You stumbled back, right into Alastor’s arms. Head spinning, you allowed him to set you down on the chair. Alastor kept a hand on your arm, watching your every movement with surgical focus. He knew, you realized. He knew how guilty you felt, how much anxiety it was causing you. How long he’d known, you had no idea, but you could feel it in the way he wouldn’t let you go. You didn’t want him to let you go. 

“Are you okay?” Lucifer looked frantic, obviously worried. “Do you need water? Something to eat? Medicine? I’m sure there’s some around here somewhere, if you just give me a minute—”

“I’m fine,” you interrupted, trying to muster a smile. You failed. How Alastor held his grin all day, every day, was a mystery to you. “Well, okay, maybe not fine.”

“They could use water,” Alastor provided, only a slight edge in his voice. Nodding, Lucifer ran off to get a glass of water, leaving you and Alastor alone in the parlor. 

Alastor was silent for a moment. You could tell he was trying to figure out what to say. “I apologize for not noticing your anxiety sooner.” A little joy fluttered in your chest. Alastor enjoyed watching everyone’s suffering—everyone except for you.

“It’s not your fault,” you told him. “I should’ve been more upfront. I just…” You were still a little shaky. Alastor’s hand moved so it rested over your hand. The rubber duck was still in your other hand, and you turned it over with your fingers, fidgeting with it. “I didn’t want you to leave me.”

“Now that is nonsense if I ever heard any!” Alastor laughed. “What a ridiculous sentiment, my dear. It would take more than that to take me from you, I assure you.”

“But I know how much you hate him.” You looked towards the direction Lucifer had gone. “You hate that he’s here. You hate that he’s meddling. And this is just another reason to hate him.”

Alastor was contemplating his words again when Lucifer came back. He gently handed you the glass of water, causing you to have to put your duck down. Alastor was right to ask for it—the water helped. The air was tense as Lucifer and Alastor glared at one another while also keeping an eye on you. 

“When you are happy, I am happy,” Alastor said out of the blue. Both you and Lucifer looked to him for clarification. “If talking with Lucifer makes you happy…” Alastor swallowed, gritting his teeth, glowering deeply at Lucifer, “then, by that logic, it makes me happy.”

“Hey, same here.” Lucifer put his arms up symbolically. “I’m not gonna leave my friend just because I hate their boyfriend– er, whatever you are, that is.”

“Partner,” you and Alastor said in unison.

“Right. That.” 

The air was still tense, but it made you feel better knowing that Alastor and Lucifer wouldn’t be fighting over you, at the very least. 

“Okay,” you said suddenly, having finished your water. “I’m going to bed. Thanks again for the duck, Lucifer.”

You barely heard Alastor growl at Lucifer upon realizing that he’d given you a gift, but it just caused you to smile fondly. Alastor was quick to step in beside you, taking your arm to escort you up to your room. 

“You’re welcome!” Lucifer called back. “But don’t think that just because you and Alastor are partners that I’ll make one for him too!” You had to stifle a laugh. Lucifer was too sweet for his own good, no matter how awkward it made him seem.

You turned so Lucifer could see your grin. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

#hazbin hotel #alastor #alastor the radio demon #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel fanfiction #alastor x reader queerplatonic #hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer x reader platonic #lucifer and alastor #i wrote this instead of doing my homework #aroace reader #aroace alastor #lucifer is trying his hardest #rhys-writes