spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Heyo! Just checking in. How are you? Anything exciting happen lately? Or just anything you wanna share? Have an amazing day/night/etc. Also, I'm gonna be date-stamping my asks since you can't see when they're sent. Just for your convenience :) (4/1/22) -🖌️

hello, thanks for checking in with me!

i actually really appreciate the time stamping, it's very helpful when i'm going through lots of asks that are all backed up and i'm not sure what's from when

let's see, in terms of things that are exciting...

I am going to be living with my two best friends and a mutual friend of ours next year! we're currently in the process of picking out decor for our shared bathroom :) it's going to be frog themed!

I am looking for a new summer job which is scary because working gives me a lot of anxiety but it is also kind of exciting!

i’m gearing up to do a dance performance next weekend which is a little scary and a little out of my comfort zone based on the type of dancing, but i’ve got my fingers crossed that it’ll be fun!

My boyfriend and I are in the very early planning stages of a trip to Disney in the winter!

in terms of anything else i want to share....

 lately i’ve gotten into journaling & i’ve pretty proud of myself for keeping up with my habit trackers

i got to pet two dogs yesterday which was really great

i’m currently reading Carmen Maria Machado’s Her Body and Other Parties, which is super good but also very deep and tragic

i’ve been very into crossword jam lately, not sure why

my latest obsession is garlic hummus. i literally can’t get enough of it, it’s so good! i eat it with carrots or pretzels (but carrots are the better out of the two)

please feel free to send me little updates of what is going on with you guys! i’d love to hear from you, and it def brings me inspiration to write when i know i have a loving audience behind me <3 (i have some stuff in the works currently tho)

- breadstick 🥖

#asks #anon #🖌️ #🖌️ anon #🥖 #breadstick speaks #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

do you watch anime?

hello!! i actually do not watch anime 😅

i tried once years ago, with two different semi/popular animes and i just couldn't get into it unfortunately :/

i like the style of the animation though! i think it's super pretty :)

you'll notice a lot of the gifs i attach to my posts are from anime, but i'm like marge simpson lol:

thank you sm for asking though! i like getting questions <3 <3 <3

- breadstick 🥖

#anon #asks #chatting with breadstick #asking breadstick #breadstick speaks #🥖 #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

loving the pastas (as quotes)

just a little something to get me back into the swing of things.. meant to be read as if you are saying it to them/writing a letter to them/a poem dedicated to them ✨

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎꘎♡━━━━━♡

Jeff,

i crave your mouth,

your voice, your hair

silent and starving, i prowl

through the streets

bread does not nourish me, dawn

disrupts me, all day,

i hunt for the liquid measure of

your steps

(written by: pablo neruda)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Jane,

i will love you as misfortune loves orphans, as fire loves innocence and as justice loves to sit and watch everything go wrong

(written by: lemony snicket)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Clockwork/Natalie,

show me

the most damaged parts of your soul,

and i will show you

how it still shines like gold

(written by: nikita gill)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Nina,

two things i’ll

forever be sure of

the sun will always

fall for the moon, &

i will always fall for you

(written by: r.m. broderick)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Liu & Sully,

i don’t want you in bits and pieces,

i want you all,

good and bad,

every last atom

(written by: atticus)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Helen,

my darling,

you hold so much sadness

in your eyes,

i can almost touch

the scars of your soul

and cry

(written by: alexandra vasiliu)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

LJ,

my soul

thinks your soul

is just pure magic

(written by: butterflies rising)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

EJ,

i love you with a deeper love

than any human heart has ever known

(written by: christy ann martine)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

BEN,

there is no one else for me.

i begin and end with you.

(written by: samantha towele)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Tim,

i will love you until the end of time

(written by: christy ann martine)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Brian,

you feel like home,

and everywhere i’ve never been,

all at once

(written by: butterflies rising)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Toby

i’d choose you

in a hundred lifetimes,

in a hundred worlds,

in any version of reality,

i’d find you and

i’d choose you

(written by: kiersten white)

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

#creepypasta #jeff the killer #🔪Jeff the Killer/Jeff Woods🔪 #jane the killer #🖤Jane Arkensaw/Jane the Killer🖤 #nina the killer #💄Nina the Killer/Nina Hopkins💄 #liu woods #🧣Liu Woods/Homicidal Liu🧣 #helen otis #🎨Bloody Painter/Helen Otis🎨 #LJ #🍬Laughing Jack/LJ🍬 #EJ #🤍Eyeless Jack/EJ🤍 #BEN #🎮BEN Drowned🎮 #❓Hoodie/Brian Thomas❓ #brian thomas #hoodie #🎭Masky/Tim Wright🎭 #tim wright #masky #🪓 Toby Rogers/Ticci Toby🪓 #ticci toby #toby rogers #quotes #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

it’s been a long time! 

i’m so sorry for leaving everyone without any notice, i just felt unmotivated and have been dealing with mental health issues (what else is new though lol). 

i have been too nervous to even open this tumblr blog to even look at anything, because i have felt guilt over leaving everyone hanging with no timeframe as to when or if i was coming back. 

so i guess this is a post saying a couple of things:

a) i’m alive

b) i’m okay, it’s just been a bit and there’s been stuff i’ve had to deal with

c) i don’t know if i’m coming back or not, it’s a bit overwhelming for me to think about so right for right now i’m just going to be focused on looking through my messages and hoping to find some inspiration. that’s the next step and we’ll see where that takes me

c) i am very interested in what you guys have been up to! i’ve genuinely missed interacting with the people on here ❤

much love to all and we’ll see where this takes me :) 

- breadstick 🥖

((dedicated to @moitears​ who is a real one from day one who i love and have missed))

#update #creepypasta #back from the dead?? #breadstick 🥖 #🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Heyo! I'm back again :) I saw requests were open, and was wondering if I could get headcanons for Brian, Tim, Toby, and EJ responding to a s/o who was really cold and kinda mean at first, but once they warmed up to them, they're actually really soft and nice? Whether you do this or not, I hope your life gets less stressful, you get along with your new roommate, and that your motivation returns. I'm also very sorry for your loss. Have a great day/night/etc. With love, 🖌️ anon <3

thank you so much <3 lots of love for you, 🖌️ anon 

~

❓Brian/Hoodie❓

❓Brian’s pretty good at reading people, so he’ll understand quickly that you just need time

❓He’ll give you all the space & time you need, because he’s very considerate

❓He trusts that you’ll come around to him eventually, and you do

❓Once you see that he is respecting your boundaries and waiting for you to come to him, you’ll start to slowly open up to him bit by bit

❓Before you know it, you’ll wind up dating each other

❓He will be surprised by your softer side, especially after you start dating

❓ It’s just not what he was expecting. Like, he knew you weren’t this mean person but he also didn’t expect you to be so soft deep down either? I mean, he’s not complaining in any way, you just surprised him a bit :)

🎭 Tim/Masky 🎭

🎭 Enemies to lovers, mayhaps?

🎭 Somebody who comes off as cold and mean could really go two ways

🎭 Option 1: You get along right off the bat because you can both complain to the other one and you can bond over all the emotional walls you’ve both built up, which will inevitably lead to the both of you bringing down the other’s walls just enough for you to begin a romantic relationship

🎭 Option 2: The two of you don’t get along because your personalities clash too much. Tim thinks you’ve got an attitude problem, you think he’s got a stick up his ass. Both of you are always sassing the other one but eventually all that personality tension melts away into romantic tension (and you make out)

🎭 If you got option one going for you: Once your soft side is revealed, Tim will probably tease you for it. Like, you’ve got this tough exterior going on but on the inside you’re all soft and mushy. (He loves it tho)

🎭 If you’ve got option two going for you: After learning how much of a softie you actually are on the inside, his own icy exterior melts as well. 

🎭 The two of you can be soft and nice to each other, as a treat :)

🪓 Toby 🪓

🪓 Toby will actually be pretty hurt by your outward attitude towards him

🪓 No matter how many times somebody tells him that it’s just your personality, he takes it as a personal offense that you don’t like him

🪓 Cut to Toby trying to do everything in his power to make you like him (because homie craves people’s attention and validation)

🪓 Toby will slowly start to worm his way into your heart with his attempts at winning you over (some are good attempts, and some fail hilariously) 

🪓 Somewhere along the way, this need for you to like him will stop being so platonic and start being romantic

🪓 You will have to start opening up to him and showing your soft side before you start dating, otherwise Toby will think you don’t want to be with him (but of course, you really do want to be with him)

🪓 Toby will be over the moon when you start reciprocating his friendship, and even more excited when you return his romantic feelings

🪓 He’ll also be stoked that you actually have a soft side underneath your cold exterior, and he’ll be the one that’s most encouraging of all to let people into your life without this whole mess of being cold to them first before you know them 

🪓 Toby is also very proud of himself, in a way, for winning you over and being the one lucky enough to be on the receiving end of your affectionate side rather than the side you show to those you don’t know/trust

🤍 EJ 🤍

🤍 This may not end well for the two of you...

🤍 Due to coming off as cold and mean, EJ will most likely interpret this as you don’t like him and are possibly afraid of him as well

🤍 I mean, why else would you be so cold to him? It’s because you don’t want to get close to a monster. And why else would you be so mean? It’s because you know what a monster he is and how he deserves this kind of treatment. 

🤍 He’d beat himself up over it on the inside, and stay away from you out of respect 

🤍 It would take a third party to step in and really explain to him that it’s a you problem, and not a him problem

🤍 He will probably need this drilled into his mind several times

🤍 Only when he’s been thoroughly convinced that this is a personality issue on your part instead of a moral conflict with him, only then will he start to come around you again

🤍 Like Brian, he will give you time & space to adjust accordingly

🤍 He’ll wait for you to come to him to initiate any kind of friendship, and he won’t be holding his breath for it either (unlike Brian, who trusts that you’ll come to him when you’re ready, EJ doesn’t have that same kind of trust)

🤍 You’ll have to show your softer side to EJ before you start dating though, because otherwise he’ll probably think that this relationship could never work

🤍 Once he knows that you’re actually very nice once you get past that layer of ice, then he’ll be more inclined to consider being in a relationship (you will have to make the first move though, he won’t do it)

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcanons #❓Hoodie/Brian Thomas❓ #🎭Masky/Tim Wright🎭 #🪓Toby Rogers/Ticci Toby🪓 #🤍Eyeless Jack/EJ🤍 #creepypasta x reader #🖌️ anon #requests #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

🌸 ✨Send this to the 12 nicest people you know or who seem to have a good heart 🌸✨

ahhh thank you so much for thinking of me!! really fills me with joy!!

- breadstick 🥖

#insane horror movie addict #asks #for the love of breadstick #🥖 #breadstick speaks #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Heyo! Just popping in to say that you're amazing and that- even when I'm really in the fandom- you're still one of my favorite blog (when I AM in the fandom, you're my #1 fave blog). You're writing is great and always helps me out when I feel down. And remember, we're all here for you! Hope things start to improve for you, and have a great day/night/etc. :) -🖌️ anon

{i’m one of your favorite blogs?? me???? little silly old me???? :0 :0 :0}

awwwwww thank you so much!!! [i’m sorry this is so old as well] <3 <3 <3

lots of love from me, 🖌️ anon, you’re always so sweet & i’m happy to see you in my askbox whenever you drop by :) 

what fandoms are you interested in outside of creepypasta, if you don't mind me asking? i'm intrigued! (and wondering if we have any in common!) 👀👀👀

- breadstick 🥖

#🖌️ anon #🥖 #for the love of breadstick #breadstick speaks #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Hii Breadstick!!! How are you doing?

At this point, I can't imagine how many requests you have in your ask box. So if you already have a lot of them, you can just ignore this.

I’d like to make a silly little request =]. I hope this doesn’t overwhelm you.

Which creeps do you think are the best cook and which are the worst?

Thank you so so so much, bby!! I love you!! Stay safe 💖💖💖💖

- dancing parrot 🐦🎶

ooo this is fun!!

this is in order of  BEST COOK to WORST COOK, with varying levels in between!

~

Skilled in the kitchen (can cook Thanksgiving/holiday dinner)

Slender (the chef of the mansion)

Hoodie (assistant to the chef)

Good cook

Jane (she has made some pretty excellent dishes, but she’s not really a fan of the whole cooking process)

Masky (he makes a mean steak & other grilled food)

Only knows how to make three (3) things without messing up

Liu (he’s not a bad cook, he just doesn’t know how to properly make meals for anybody other than himself) 

Nina (she likes to cook when she’s in the right mood for it, but she just doesn’t have the skillset or really the patience for it either)

Helen (he has no interest in being a cook & he also forgets to eat half the time)

Terrible cook

Clockwork (nobody ever taught her how & she doesn’t want to learn)

BEN (only knows how to make microwavable food & even that’s a struggle)

EJ (he is excused because he literally can’t see & he doesn’t even eat actual food anymore, so this is really not his fault)

Do NOT let them near the kitchen unless you want the house to burn down

Jeff (he’s just a hazard in general & prone to setting things on fire; also had nobody to teach him how to make anything)

Sally (she’s a child in a kitchen, she doesn’t know how to cook)

LJ (also acts like a child in the kitchen despite not being one)

Toby (he is the worst, not only does he not know how to cook but he also has the tics that get in his way)

#creepypasta #creepypasta most to least #🌲Slenderman🌲 #❓Hoodie/Brian Thomas❓ #🖤Jane Arkensaw/Jane the Killer🖤 #🎭Masky/Tim Wright🎭 #🧣Liu Woods/Homicidal Liu🧣 #💄Nina the Killer/Nina Hopkins💄 #🎨Bloody Painter/Helen Otis🎨 #⏰Clockwork/Natalie Ouellette⏰ #🎮BEN Drowned🎮 #🤍Eyeless Jack/EJ🤍 #🔪Jeff the Killer/Jeff Woods🔪 #🧸 sally williams 🧸 #🍬Laughing Jack/LJ🍬 #🪓Toby Rogers/Ticci Toby🪓 #creepypasta headcanons #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

🌸 ✨Send this to the 12 nicest people you know or who seem to have a good heart 🌸✨

Ily how’ve you been love bug?

omg thank you so much for this!! i know i've been in & out, but i've been doing well! classes just ended for me, i've moved back home temporarily, & i have a lot more time on my hands all of a sudden which has been.... weird? good weird, but still weird lol

how have you been?

- breadstick 🥖

#whaleofatjme1920 #asks #for the love of breadstick #🥖 #breadstick 🥖 #breadstick speaks #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Your writing is very lovely and is a joy to read! If you feel like it, could you maybe write some headcanons for some activities or hobbies that the pastas enjoy doing together?

That they enjoy doing together? Hmmm, let me think....

Here's eight examples of what different pasta-duos enjoy doing together....

🍬 LJ & BEN 🎮

LJ likes to test out new jokes on BEN

BEN actually likes watching some of LJ's performances that he puts on (when he's in the right mood for it)

LJ in turn is willing to participate in some of BEN's video games, but he doesn't always understand how to play

He's more content to watch, and be sort of like a "backseat player," if BEN's in the mood for that (because sometimes BEN's happy to just have company while he's gaming, and LJ's good for that because he's easily impressed by BEN's gaming abilities which makes him kind of stroke BEN's gaming ego a bit)

They also enjoy watching baking shows together

🎮 BEN & Jeff 🔪

Um, they're best friends?? They do everything together??

They are obviously gaming buddies

They enjoy watching trashy TV together and ripping it apart

They also like to stay up late having movie marathons

And do general crackhead activities together as well, gotta have that in a best friendship

🔪Jeff & Toby 🪓

Jeff likes to dare Toby to do things, and Toby's happy to be included so he usually does them

Jeff and Toby sometimes wrestle together (sometimes it's fake and sometimes it's not)

Toby likes to tag along with Jeff and either BEN or LJ to get into some trouble together (a real headache for Slender)

🎭 Tim & Toby 🪓

Tim's taken Toby fishing one time (but it's hard for Toby to sit still for a long time, & he ends up scaring the fish... He still likes to be included though)

Tim will sometimes, if he's in a patient mood, attempt to teach Toby how to cook (more often than not, Brian will also be there to help coach Toby as well)

🪓Toby & Brian❓

Brian will sometimes read to Toby, when Toby feels like he can't sit still or focus for that long

Brian and Toby also enjoy taking walks together (and sometimes Tim or maybe even EJ will join in)

Brian also invites Toby to pluck weeds out of the garden with him, and Toby takes his de-weeding job very seriously

❓Brian & Tim 🎭

They, much like BEN and Jeff, are best friends who do everything together (not everything really, but just a lot of stuff)

They both like to fish, to take walks together, to read books and then swap them, and they also just like to sit and each independently do their own thing but while in the company of the other

They are also both a fan of card games

🤍 EJ & Toby 🪓

EJ likes to listen to Toby chatter away a mile a minute... he doesn't mind listening and Toby is grateful to have somebody who likes to listen to his rambling and stuttering

The two spend a lot of "quality time" together with EJ patching up Toby's various cuts and scrapes

🤍 EJ & Brian❓

Brian will often read to EJ

They also like to sit and enjoy each other's company while silently working on something else

Sometimes EJ will ask Brian to describe what things look like

#creepypasta headcanons #🍬Laughing Jack/LJ🍬 #🎮BEN Drowned🎮 #🔪Jeff the Killer/Jeff Woods🔪 #🎭Masky/Tim Wright🎭 #❓Hoodie/Brian Thomas❓ #🪓Toby Rogers/Ticci Toby🪓 #🤍Eyeless Jack/EJ🤍 #creepypasta friendships #creepypasta hcs #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

when i thought i was gone for like a week or two with a couple of posts set up but in reality i just went offline for almost a whole month....

- breadstick 🥖

#what have i done #what am i doing #??? #🥖 #breadstick speaks #creepypasta blog #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

HII BREADSTICK!! AAAAAAAAA I MISSED YOU!!!

you don't need to apologize for your absence!

you just moved out of your house and went through so much, you would imagine that this situation would cause a little discouragement in your writing routine.

i'm sorry for your loss, cancer is really horrible. If you want to talk about it don't hesitate to seek help.

I'm so proud of you, Breadstick! Even with all this happening you came back here and said you're going to try to write again, and I am proud that you are learning how to be an adult on your own. I know you can do it!!! (cheering sounds)

what a brave friend I have!

your writing is wonderful!! I think I keep saying it but it's true! I love the way you express your words, your headcanons, the cute and adorable aesthetic of your blog, I could stay here talking for hours on end

I missed you! I'm sending you kisses and hugs and all the best!!!

💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

- dancing parrot🐦🎶

DANCING PARROT YOU'RE THE BEST ❤❤❤❤

this means so much to me, thank you so much bby!! 

- breadstick 🥖

#🐦🎶 #dancing parrot anon 🐦🎶 #dancing parrot #dancing parrot anon #🐦🎶dancing parrot #anon #asks #for the love of breadstick #🥖 #breadstick speaks #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Helloo Breadstick!! Welcome back!! how are you doing? I hope you are doing well!

I would like to requesttt a headcannons (fluff and angst?? idk, its up to you ;] ). For Tim! With an s/o who is neutral chaotic but can be chill. And at night, s/o would always stay in their room and read a book or draw or chill to songs and etc. Yup! thats all!! Thank you for your time!! Take care <3<3<3

I didn't know what exactly to do for this one, so it's just like little hcs :) {and thank you for asking, i'm doing pretty well!}

🎭 Tim might get annoyed at his s/o for being a bit chaotic at times, but you can hardly blame him

🎭 He's got a stressful job, chaotic coworkers, and he's always tired of everybody's shit.

🎭 As long as you're calm enough to give him a good break after a hard day, he's good.

🎭 And a little bit of chaos, like the good kind of chaos, might be good for him actually. Get him to loosen up just a bit, have some fun.

🎭 Tim also thinks it's cute that you stay up to chill in your room, just vibing and having a good time in there by yourself.

🎭 He'd like to know your book recs, but he probably would never get around to actually reading them because he's got too much on his plate

🎭 Same thing with songs, too. He'd like to know what you're listening to, but unless you actually show him these things, he probably won't look it up on his own time.

🎭 Tim would really like to see your drawings though. He can be quite invested in your art, and he'll keep anything you give him (probably in a box or something under his bed)

🎭 He sometimes would get on your case about staying up too late, but once you've been together long enough, he'd know that's just a part of who you are

🎭 And I mean, he'd like to join you, but you know, he's got work in the morning 🙄

🎭 He's just an old man in disguise, he's gotta go to bed early and get his beauty sleep lol

#HCS #creepypasta hcs #🎭 #masky #tim wright #masky/tim wright x reader #🎭 Masky/Tim Wright 🎭 #creepypasta #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Breadstick, I finished reading They Both Die at The End (one of your recommendations) and what distressed me the most was not all the moment of reflection I had in the 5 hours that followed after I finished reading, but that no one told me Rufus is bald!!

I had even drawn them both, only to be shocked to discover that Rufus has a shaved head! Only at the end of the book!!

ok, kidding aside, thank you very much for the recommendation! Seriously I loved the book 😢❤️❤️❤️❤️

-dancing parrot🐦🎶

oh, i'm so glad you liked it!!! That actually warms my heart to know that you actually read a book based on my suggestion (and you liked it!!)

Also, this is news to me too??? Maybe I just blocked it out because I don't like that mental image 😭 can't believe he's actually bald 😭

(also, I got your Halloween message, and I hope your Halloween was lovely!!)

- breadstick 🥖

#🐦🎶 #dancing parrot anon 🐦🎶 #dancing parrot #dancing parrot anon #🐦🎶 dancing parrot #anon #asks #🥖 #breadstick speaks #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Okay so, I keep jumping fandoms and my stupid brain hasn't properly revisited the Creepypasta fandom yet, but you're still amazing and I miss you <3 -🖌 anon

🖌 anon, i understand completely... i've been stuck in the same fandom for a long time now, it's just like deeply cemented into my brain at this point, but i get like that sometimes.

like, when i'm hyperfixated on a fandom, i can't imagine ever not being THIS intensely interested in it, THIS involved, and I can't picture myself liking another thing as much as I like THIS thing. But then I'll hop onto another hyperfixation-fandom, and I'll wonder how I could have ever been SO wrapped up in that other fandom, obviously THIS fandom is the superior one, etc etc etc. It's an endless loop lol

I wonder if it's the same or at least similar for you? either way, thank you for still thinking of me and popping by to say hello <3

- breadstick 🥖

#🖌 #anon #asks #🖌 anon #for the love of breadstick #🥖 #breadstick speaks #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

Hi breadstick!!! Loved your last head canon!

thank you so much!!! i know this response is late, but it means so much to me when you guys comment on my work!! it really makes my whole day <3

- breadstick 🥖

#pissboymcassface #asks #for the love of breadstick #🥖 #breadstick speaks #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick

[spookybreadstick]

hi hi !!

i havent sent a letter in a while, i've gotten pretty busy doing color guard. do you know what that is? it's quite fun, though less people know about it.

color guard is like rotc, but it's less serious n stuff. it's usually contemporary dance with flags, rifles, and sabers. we work with the marching band !! and no the weapons aren't real, they do hurt though. we tape them up with electrical tape and wear gloves since it can hurt your hands a lot.

we have a show review next week !! that means whatever show we decided to create this year and work on we'll be going to another school to have the judges review our show and give us any criticism n what not.

we even are going to start practice for a new years parade our school has always been performing for for literal decades. it's 5 miles so we really have to build up stamina to do flag work and dance, not to mention memorize and have a good diet for it. since it's a parade it'll be about 1-3 hours long.

it's odd, i'm not used to being busy often or having an actual schedule since i've been depressed since i was young—though i haven't been diagnosed. i'm not diagnosed with anything, i know i said i had adhd and i feel bad for lying. i have a cousin a first cousin with it and i researched it since i wanted to do something in any medical profession or like- therapy at some point. so every single thing i read or research, i have symptoms or can relate far too much. i've been relating to and understanding anything i see about people with adhd or people with adhd explaining it or describing it since i was in elementary. i don't want to self diagnose though, that isn't good, but it sucks being stuck with either being diagnosed but then actually being diagnosed and having my family treat me like some kid.

i don't talk about it often besides with friends though since i don't want people thinking i'm being weird or faking it. i've just been having the symptoms since as long as i can remember so i try and figure it out myself before i decide to go and ask to be diagnosed.

i had the courage to ask my doctor a year ago but i was moving in a week when i asked so i couldn't get an evaluation or be assessed. so when i finally asked, my situation ruined it.

sorry for dumping like that. i got sick recently so i havent been able to be awake much or do anything properly. it's not covid, just a sore throat n lots of congestion. i have to blow my nose every 30 seconds i swear. so i havent been able to tell any friends and stuff about these things.

anyways, daily questions so prepare yourself !! how are you, mentally, physically, and emotionally? anything fun you did recently? have you been taking care of yourself? are you okay, considering the amount of time you took away from tumblr to move n all of that. how's moving been?

that's all for this letter, and i'm sorry if any of the topics i've mentioned aren't very joyous or make anyone get triggered.

– MC

hi MC, it's good to hear from you! so sorry for such a late reply :(

My ex-best friend used to do color guard, so I know of it's existence (she took up the activity at the end of our friendship, so I don't know too much, thanks for filling me in!) It sounds like a lot of work, so I applaud you for that. I don't think I could ever do it lol

self-diagnosis can be a tricky thing because you’re right, it isn’t great to self-diagnose but at the same time I know not everybody has the resources and means to get officially diagnosed. And in my opinion, diagnosis can do a lot of good for a person. I have a math learning disability that I wasn’t diagnosed with until last year. I knew something was wrong but I wasn’t able to get tested for the longest time. It actually hindered me more I think when it hung over my head as some big cloud of “I know something’s wrong with me but I can’t get tested, what if this is all in my head & I’m just making it up for attention, or what if I’m just really dumb and trying to use this an excuse for it’. all that fun self-doubting/spiraling thoughts. But after I got tested and diagnosed with my learning disability for math, it’s like things shifted for me. I had more patience with myself, if that makes sense. I started to treat myself like I would if I was any other person with a math learning disability. Like when those thoughts came to me, I was able to say to myself ‘You know you have a math learning disability and that’s okay, you’re not making it up for attention, and you’re not dumb’. It was a freeing and calming thing for me, so I totally get why it would be the same for you with a self-diagnosis (although I hope you can actually get diagnosed soon for your own sake and mental well-being, I know it’s tough though!) And you know, plenty of people have ADHD and it’s nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed by if you do have it! If anybody treats you differently (which I don’t think they will), then that’s their problem, not yours! 

As for your questions....

1a) I am mentally doing alright. Seasonal depression is coming back, I can feel it in my bones, so that’s always tough

1b) I am physically well, just have a lot of bruising from dancing (I’m part of a dance club, and while learning some new moves I totally wiped out!!) 

1c) I am emotionally good right now! Things have been crazy lately but things are calming down enough for me to take a breather, you know?

2) The fun thing that I did recently was go back to my family’s house and help them decorate for Christmas! 

3) I’ve been trying to take care of myself! I’ve been really enjoying parfaits lately, and I also recently bought some new skin-care products that I’m excited to try out. I am slacking on my vitamins though, so I’ve gotta get that in check! 

4) It was hard for me to take a break to be honest, and I know I’m still not super regular with everything, but the move and classes and everything was a lot harder than I thought. In a good way though, if that makes sense? Like I thought it would be a bad-hard, like I’m lonely and crying all the time and I have all this extra empty time on my hands that I could at least use to work on the blog, but it’s not like that. It’s good-hard, like I have friends and I’m doing activities and I’m staying so busy with general life and such that I don’t have a lot of time for the blog like I thought I would. So it’s good, but also not exactly what I expected?

Thank you for your letter MC! Hope to hear from you soon!

- breadstick 🥖

#MC #mc letters #asks #🥖 #breadstick speaks #breadstick 🥖 #spookybreadstick