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castle-dominion · 1 year

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c4x6 demons

Nice big moon there oh yes buzzfeed unsolved moments! I should finish watching that with my older bro... Where's the van outside tho? How do the doors close again? Maybe ghosts ARE real. Like in murdoch mysteries & then it was never again acknowledged that murdoch could see ghosts What can he see? I thought the thing came from you-know-where?

AC, on her dad's lap as they watch a movie together but then he tilts her in front of him: Dad, are you using me as a shield against flesh-eating zombies? She looks so adult. & oddly tanned. RC: I know he's busy, and you are very thoughtful to be so accommodating, sweetheart, but a healthy relationship is based on mutual respect. I mean, think about what kind of signal you're sending if you're the one always re-arranging your schedule at the other one's every beck and call. I mean, if you just drop everything the very moment that— *beckett calls* *castle drops everything at her call*

RC: The Ghost Wranglers are here? Okay, that's why I love these guys. Body's not even cold, they're already tracking down the ghost. KB: Why doesn't it surprise me that you actually watch that ridiculous show? GIRL SHUT UP RC: Ridiculously awesome. Jack Sinclair is, *becks turns to him in shock* hands down, America's most accomplished ghost hunter. KB: Um...Castle...Jack Sinclair is the name of our victim.

LP: His throat was slit almost from ear to ear, jugular, superior thyroid, common carotid left and right. You name it, it's been severed. Sexy Can't you be behind the guy? Heck yeah ghost killer! She works with dead ppl don't let her believe in ghosts

Oh nice maybe they caught the murder on camera castle explaining what it means <3 So many angles! Mum & I both immediately knew it wasn't begging for mercy. An emp maybe? (btw I'm pronouncing it émp' like in rvb when they were arguing abt it) GIRL IF THEY HAD AN ARGUMENT THAT IS A RECENT UPSET IN RELATIONSHIPS, THAT'S WHAT THEY ASKED ABOUT

Ryan's nice red sweater over his suit uwu JE: Right. Hey, we're still on for dinner tomorrow night, right? Me: what? Maybe it's a game night or smth not a date haha KR: Oh, yeah, Jenny's totally psyched. Me: oh KR: She's never really hung out with Lanie before, so *full body nod* cool. JE: Well, just to let you know, Lanie's gonna be getting off a double shift. So, she could be a little cranky. KR: Oh. *squints eyes* Maybe we should reschedule. I mean, isn't the whole point for Jenny and Lanie to get along? JE: Nah, she'll be cool. Just, you know, don't say anything controversial. KR, walking back over & crossing arms: Like what? What's controversial? [The computer makes a sound.] JE: Bingo. KR: Bingo. Don't talk about Bingo? JE: No. *gestures with some irritation* Barry Bavetta's been busy, and so has his lap. Dude has racked up a hell of a tab at a strip club

RC: We heard you were racking up quite a bill. Or is that billing quite a rack?

Sounds like he said he did kill the guy but obv it couldn't have been him. "you decided to prove him wrong"

Killing time was KIND OF funny "apparition american" KB: You'll see, Castle. This'll turn out just like every other murder investigation. *Ryan walks up looking concerned.* Once we find out more about our victim's life, the details surrounding his death, everything will be explained. KR: Um…maybe not everything. Mr irish folklore over there he looks SO mildly concerned & shaken & I LOVE it, good acting b'y *gestures politely to send castle in first* Caught a ghost! So cool!

Posting that intro on my blog

B'y surely u got SOME sleep esposito smiling watching castle set up his ghost murder board *drank her coffee* RC: ready for this? Espt *nods* RC: a demon

RC: That's not a real thing, you know. That real ghost hunters use. JE: "Real" ghost hunters? Isn't that a contradiction in terms, bro? Oxymoron? Nah man let people have their beliefs I thought that "I do" was Ryan Ooh Ryan nice tie! RC: You see? I am telling you, there is something going on with this house. The last people-- to-- *Castle tries to flip the board back around, but Beckett stops him.* RC: The last people that lived there moved out four years ago in a hurry. KR, breathy: Why? RC: I don't know, but I think it's time we found out. KB: Knock yourself out, Castle. RC: You're not coming? KB: No. I've got a murder to solve. KR sidles up to castle, eyes wide, eyebrow raised, mouth open: I'll go. *softly* [Beckett gives Ryan a look. Castle smiles at Ryan, then turns and sees Beckett's expression and his face falls. Beckett narrows her eyes.] RC: Ooh. That's a look. KR, looking down & to the side: Yeah. RC: I get these a lot. Just start walking. Faster. [Beckett watches them leave, then smiles & looks over at the empty coffee cups.] Ryan really is becoming castle jr!

Poor beckett, castle drank her coffee then said he'd make her one then he doesn't & she burns herself on it. I like the idea of ryckett & casito but rn we have some rystle & especkett scenes. JE: Yo. I, uh, just saw Ryan downstairs. I can't believe you let him go chasing ghosts with Castle. KB: Yeah. Maybe Shaggy'll keep Scooby out of trouble. Besides, you never know, maybe they'll come up with something useful. JE: Oh, you want useful. *sarcastic surprise* 'Cause I just spoke to CSU. They found fingerprints at the scene from a real live person, so… *points & wiggles finger* Becks still has the coffee with her

Girl maybe he thinks he was molested by a ghost it is not your business to make fun of the (probably psychological) issues of a man in prison! Wow the grammar & spelling... the handwriting is fine

Poor guy, he has to live with his mom bc he's an ex-con, he violated his parole for the guy who ruined his prison life, I just really feel for this guy. Prophesy vibes

This is so cool & cute & funny & scary! RC, trying not to show his excitement over the ghost: Oh, my God, that's terrible Ryan looking mildly freaked out is my new favourite thing Mercedes King & Mercy LaGrande are both cool names KB: So the question is, how is she involved in all of this? *rystle look at each other & hop up quickly* RC: Uh, well, you know, uh, Ryan and I would be glad to go check this out *ryan nods half winks* if you guys are too busy solving that murder. *especkett share a look*

Oh & now caskett is here instead of rystle These folks are doctors. They are psychologists, they are pharmacists, they are the medical professionals of the past. & I respect them. Why did he say mercy I can see IT not HIM? his face is an it but jack could have said him too.

Give that man a prize. tbh I expected the pics to be even more gory Murdoch mind moments!

I love the term on the lam, I like this guy's shirt (I have one from hot topic that looks like it lol) RC, looking to beckett: Really? He claimed there was a demon involved? AS: I know. Like anyone's going to fall for that, right? I mean, what kind of jackass did he think he was dealing with?

Ooh info! Cool! Valid, he probably turned him away. Yep you need a warrant babe. Do you need a warrant to get their car service logs? Ooh I love it when they do that! There was this one time a serial killer was watching TV with his wife 20 or 30 years later or smth & they said "this is a serial killer, we think he looks like this" with an aged up model including the style of glasses he would most likely wear & the wife looked at him & said "it looks exactly like you" & they both just laughed it off bc how could this guy my husband be a serial killer? lol that's so silly how he looks like the killer.

KB: Wait a minute, don't you guys have dinner plans tonight? KR, afraid: Uh, we can move it to…some night when Lanie's not coming off a double shift. JE: Uh, actually, Lanie's really looking forward to it. KB: You know what? No worries. It's on my way home. [Beckett takes the photos.] KR+JE: You sure? KB: That I don't want to be the one to blame for ruining Lanie's night out? Oh, yeah. I am sure.

Martha <3 Ooh hoo wowie look at alexis! & going to a party too! No he literally just called, you can answer & say she just went out bc she had plans or smth! gah!

Ooh scottish architecture! Ooh Laird's Lugs! KB: We'll go first thing in the morning, see what we come up with. RC: *puppydog eyes* KB: You want to go now?

RC: For me. Please. KB: I ain't afraid of no ghosts. *ghostbusters theme*

She's pulling his leg KB: How long have you known me, Castle? Of course I don't believe in ghosts. *door closes* RC: What was that? *lights go out* KB: Well, that's odd. RC: No, that's more than just odd. This is the same sequence of events that preceded Jack Sinclair's murder. KB: Except Jack only had an EMF meter. I've got a gun and a flashlight. *The flashlight goes out.* Except wouldn't their phones also be out? Gosh it's hard to be on someone's shoulders *grabs* KB: *gasps!!* Castle, I said legs, okay? RC: Oh. Legs. Sorry.

LP: Not as sorry as I was. I'm around dead people all day. When I get home, I want a live one. JE, eating: I was tired. [Ryan and Jenny laugh.] JO: I can't believe we waited so long to do this, babe. KR, wearing his fortnightversary tie: Yeah. Yeah, it really did turn out to be a perfect night. JE: *winks at ryan* KR: I would like to propose a toast. I know that it's kind of corny, but it's me, (yeah lol) so well, there we go. Uh, to best friends, now and forever. [They toast.] JO: Cheers. JE: And to the future newlyweds. JO: Aww. [They toast again.] KR: You are so thoughtful. LP: Cheers. JO: You know, Kevin said you guys made a great couple, *Lanie smiles & leans towards javier* but I had no idea. [Lanie and Esposito cuddle and lean in to kiss.] JO: So, when are you two getting married? [That kills the mood and Esposito and Lanie recoil w/o even kissing.] KR: JO: LP: JE: *stares daggers at Ryan* KR: *moves to drink his wine during the awkward silence.*

Sad that they found a magnetic field generator to explain the moving tripod BUT wouldn't it have also moved every other tripod & any metal that Sinclair had on him? WHY is it creaking tho? *makes castle open the door* Oh it's a rat It's like when higgins kissed a corpse! Well he fell on it & his lips touched its lips but he was so grossed out about kissing a corpse & that's totally valid Poor castle lol

Hide & seek lol. In the morgue: *Beckett exits and Castle stops on his way out* RC: Hey, how'd that double date go? LP: *crosses her arms and glares.* RC: I-- I just… LP: *eye twitches* *KB comes back in abt the case, but castle leaves past her* RC: Don't ask her about the date.

KR: Look, I said I'm sorry, okay? t-- h-- I didn't mean to jinx the dinner. JE: (imitating)"This really is the perfect night." KR: Jenny got a little caught up in the moment. JE: (falsetto)"When are you two getting married?" That's a question you do not ask! (Yeah jenny, sorry. I love you plenty tho. btw when are we going to find out she's a spy like with terrence myers or mary morstan) [Ryan sighs.] JE, mellowing out: I-- You know, it's-- it's not entirely your guys' fault. KR: You guys have a big fight after? JE: Big fight? *laughing* No. Mega fight, *seriously* yes. *ryan nods* The point is, we, um…we decided that we're gonna cool things off. (Good facial expressions.) KR, sad for his friend: Wait, you mean split up? JE: Yeah. Just until we both figure out what we want. *looks down kinda sad but also an "i don't talk about emotions" way* KR: Man, I'm so sorry. JE: Anyway. *starts ignoring him* KR: Look, brother, if you need anything, you know I'm always here… What? Friendship<3 also "brother" is such a Term

WHOA THE BRO GOT THE GIRL? Cafe jouer not cafe jouerre bro Either it's weird how he remembers all the details or they got burned into his brain bc of that event or it's weird how he remembers all the details bc they would be overshadowed by the horror.

KR: It wasn't someone Melanie worked with. I just tracked down George Banner, Melanie's manager at Flywide Travel twenty years ago. He said Melanie had two co-workers: KR: both guys. RC: A-ha. KR: Married. RC: Still… KR: To each other. (XD WOW) RC: Oh. I mean bisexuality, maybe they invited her to join idk The way castle's hair moves lol

It is not going to be him Ooh strong man there WOAH DETECTIVE SMITH!? Yeah I can understand why you... wait he killed her too I forgot AS: You're both very smart, but you're forgetting one thing. Me: you have a gun? AS: This house is haunted. Nice, lights out scene, fun. Now becks has also lost her gun, maybe ryan won't feel so bad about tyson getting the drop on him.

AS: Get on your knees. *castle starts moving* KB: Don't worry, Castle. He's not gonna shoot us. That won't fit the legend. AS: *pulls a sexy knife* rysposito had better be around Technically that's illegal tho

Ooh castle is so right! Jack sinclair's ghost was TOTALLY solving the murder! Sussy elevator (are ghosts canonically real?)

Oh no I feel bad for ashlexis. Castle said "goin'a" like "going ta" except since n & t are in the same place in the mouth he just said goin'a, not quite "gonna" Cuddling <3 Flesh eating zombies I love their father daughter love time Wait am I in the zombie movie? As soon as they press play we're going to be attacked by zombies!

#castle 4x6 #castle 4x6 spoilers #castle 4x6 quote #castle family #esparish breakup #the ghost hunting episode

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burger-bro · 2 years

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I was gonna do farm work to build up muscle but then I realised I struggled with a heavy bag so that’s probably out 🤣 honestly that’s a good t shirt though, I pretty much exclusively wear shorts and a t shirt while I’m inside. I’m always overheating 😅 my mum would be thrilled she loves the film ‘Grease’! Also stuff like Heavy Rain, Until Dawn, Life Is Strange, The Wolf Among Us etc aka choice games more or less. I actually don’t drink alcohol at all so have at it by all means 🤣

See the thing about heavy stuff is if you lift it enough you get stronger bruh 😂 It is very comfy it's more of an around the house pajama sort of shirt though. I don't understand how are all of y'all other butches freaking space heaters??? Everyone's like oh gosh I'm so hot 😩 dude get over here and keep me warm sheesh. But I also have thyroid issues I think that's why I get cold easy 😅 And grease John Travolta is such a gender of only I was that cool. Oh ok I get you now. I have life is strange but I haven't finished it yet. Stellar soundtrack tho honestly. And good that way I don't have to share 😌

#asks #ryan

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tg-headcanons · 2 years

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Yo! So this is a really specific ghoul biology question. My oc has a thyroid issue (hypothyroidism: where the thyroid doesn’t make enough of a certain hormone) and it’s just to put another part of myself into her.

But I was wondering what that would look like in a ghoul, with like symptoms and stuff. I mean it would probably be similar to what regular human symptoms are like (higher metabolism, late periods, tiredness, hair loss, brittle nails) but maybe more extreme? Or like how would it affect the kagune? Since they’re made of the same stuff as hair and nails would they would become more brittle too? I don’t think it would cause them to fall out tho, that’s a bit much. Would it affect the rc count as well? And I feel like ghouls with thyroid issues would also smell different, like maybe just the regular ghoul smell but more subdued?

So yeah, I have the super basic stuff of this figured out. I just wanted your insight to get into specifics and elaborate more :D

-theeggistheworld (I didn’t want my main blog on the ask lol)

THIS IS REALLY INTERESTING AND I HAVE THOUGHTS

Ghouls can be effected by pretty much all the same issues a human can have so long as their bodies allow for it. Hypothyroidism is just as common with them (if not more) as it is with humans, though it effects them differently in some ways

Lots of the symptoms are the same, the biggest of which is pain and fatigue. Due to the lack of accessible treatments, there’s little help for it, and many aren’t able to hunt normally because of it. It’s common for ghouls with this disorder to resort to Mantising, the hunting style of seducing or otherwise luring their prey into their home or another secluded place where they can kill them more easily without strain. Even so many find that still too hard, and will need help obtaining meat

Their regeneration is very slow. Due to a lack of keratin (which ghouls already need to conserve) they grow back injured tissue very slow, and they scar very easily. They tend to have a symptom that ghouls can get that isn’t exclusive to thyroid issues but is more common with them, in which tissue unable to regenerate due to a lack of needed nutrients is instead held together by a soft kagune mass that acts as a scab. It keeps the blood from spilling and, though not airtight, most infections out. It will slowly be replaced by normal tissue once they get the nutrients they need but it’s an odd sight until then

Another thing it effects is the kagune. With weakened cell membranes from a lack of keretin, their kagune are much softer and struggle to harden for battle. Usually they can only harden it for short bursts if at all, so most will learn to use knives or guns or whatever they have at their disposal in addition to it. For as much as other ghouls may see it as a weakness, it leaves one hell of an impression. There’s still legends of a ghoul who hunted with a cleaver and a bullwhip who did so because their kagune could never harden enough to fight with

The cold intolerance comes with unique advantages. Not only can they function way better than other ghouls in day to day life during the summer months, but their kagune will often be extremely bioluminescent. It’s the largest heat regulation organ they have, it usually gives off heat to cool the ghoul while fighting, but with the need to contain the heat, any heat energy it would have given off is instead stored, and instead it adapts to giving off light as a way of expelling excess energy. Some of these ghouls can light up a whole room with their kagune alone, and it’s considered exceptionally beautiful.

Hypothyroidism is actually slightly more common in ghouls because this extremely attractive kagune trait is sought after by many potential partners and is likely to be passed down as any ghoul with it has their pick of smitten suitors. An unexpected side effect of ghoul hypothyroidism is being too sexy

Ghouls don’t have periods, but they have heat cycles, and it does effect that. They can happen less frequently, have lighter symptoms, or even outright stop. It’s one of the few perks so long as they’re not trying to have kids

They’re much more hungry. They’re some of the only ghouls who have the apatite of a kakuja without being one. Those who can eat as much as they want to naturally do much better than those who can’t, and the added nutrients help keep the symptoms in check

It’s very treatable, they just can’t go to normal doctors most of the time. However if they can get medication off of ghoul doctors, humans with the same prescription who can get some for them, or just steal it, it does help them. As for those who can’t get it, they tend to treat it by simply eating human thyroid glands, Though It’s not nearly as effective. Pretty much any ghoul who eats well and gets medication will thrive almost if not equally as well as a ghoul without it, and those who can’t will struggle, but still generally be okay so long as they have a few friends and a kitchen knife

#tokyo ghoul #tokyo ghoul headcanon

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freecornland · 2 years

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week? 3? how?

- so hey, things haven’t really been awesome this week. my mum and me aren’t on talking terms but tmrw we have an outing so i don’t really know how to feel about it?

- fucking garbage preboards are over YAY i fucked up every single exam

- nasty nasty family issues, parents need to be checked before they’re even trying to have kids. like a full blown therapy.

- i hurt myself accidentally being the clumsy klutz i am atleast six times and lowkey everything in my body hurts naur T_T. also got my period so that’s that :/

- my bois, two of them have covid :(((((((((((((( get well soon

- on a better note: i submitted my uni essays and applied fully for real. loml sunflowa helped me out and god the surge of confidence i got from that essay review? unbeatable.

- i have reasoning in the entrance test for the dream uni and i gotta work my ass off these 10 days. god i hope it works out unlike the summer school.

- so this show, it’s okay to not be okay. i’ve discovered some cool as fuck music yk? and about the show, well, um, i relate to gang-tae a lot. more on that in another post? maybe this will be my review blog as well. loml thinks i should make films.

- i haven’t journaled this whole week tho :/ and kinda ignored myself throughout

- on thyroid medication because my results were pretty bad sighe.

- missing loml, hope they’re safe and okaie. i hope they understand.

(this’ not really a studyblr update tho- hehe- sowwy-)

#soyablr #ranting basically #soya losing her shit #cashie-yah i hope you're okie please try to understand #don't be meanie beanie #imy #get well soon bangtanie #uwu

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insight-inspire · 5 years

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Personal Post <vitamin deficiencies>

Okay so I know I’m really deficient in vitamin d- like my doctor prescribed me a special vitamin d regimen cause mine was at 6. The number 6. Yeah. BUT I realized that what if I have so much trouble losing weight because I’m lacking in certain vitamins. 🤔 cause my body felt better with the vitamin d and sugarfree redbull contains lots of b vitamins and I feel better when I drink one a day. So I want to go to the doctor and get a full test and try to up some of the vitamins I’m lacking. Also try green tea extract. I know my thyroid is fine so that’s not it. My metabolism is just like the actual slowest thing ever and supposedly lacking proper nutrition can lead to slow metabolism even if you’re “eating” well. I just hate seeing the doctor tho. Anyways I’m excited to try this cause it actually feels like it makes a difference with the added vitamin d and b. Which is cool. Wish me luck xoxo

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starlightshoe · 5 years

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tagged in a tag game by the radical @piscis-pictor-austrinos !! thank ypue!! i almost never see when im mentioned in my activity so its nice to finally catch one!! tagging @69420coolman @romanticwyvern @memequeenmachine420 @galaxyvent @yoursaltness @yoursjuli @some-lonely-knight and anyone else who wants to do it (i know thats a little eh of a end but im seriois if you want to do it but arent tagged you are called upon by me personally!)

Questions:

Are you named after someone?

apparently i have a grandma or greater on my dads side?? that has my same first name!! and my multitude of middle names apparently comes from some names in my family. in another universe however, my mom decided to go through with naming me justice or maria/h!

Last time I cried?

cannot remember actually, but then again a few days ago becomes a major blur in summer! i do think it was because i was snapped at in an hour of major stress tho so bummer

Do I use sarcasm?

i tend to be and come across as a lot more sarcastic irl?? i gues?? i dont talk much but i have roasted before and made witty split second words ex. i was playin uno with the Boiz during the last weeks of school and we started a bruh chain. when the guy before me completed his bruh i went immidiately after, skipping over my ex-crush and when everyone noticed i went “nah hes not even a part of this[the game]” and i think that was the last thing i said to him b4 gradiation so like that was. a heck of a sendoff

First thing I notice about a person?

i feel vibes with a person sometimes!! like i immediately had a good gut feeling about a teacher man in the waiting room of a doctors office and me and my sister chatted with him some very very good discussioning happening there! otherwise i wanna say i notice voices too! i can hear a lot through peoples voices!

What’s your eye colour?

dark brown! you can still tell from a distance they are brown and not black tho

Scary movies or Happy Endings?

i can make do with either! sometimes if you truly feel a story shouldve had a happier end and the characters deserved better you can always yank them out and into a happier au!

Special Talent?

hmmm. it is not very unique but it is a skill that is pretty useful! i am growing to be an efficient pirate and one day i shall finally kinfirm rip off rodney from icarly except my trench coat has copies of The Lion King but it has both versions in case you face disappointment from the cgi one. it will also have funky menus.

Birthplace?

i was born in nevada a little ways away from las vegas!!! my records got busted like many years ago and i only BARELY got my birth certificate back! i suppose thats a good thing we never drove to mexico and back in that time. oof.

Hobbies?

GOD I NEVER REALIZED BUT i dabble in a lot of things! however i am always drawing and editing stuff! i also video game, plant, and hand made craft as well!

Pets?

I AM playing neko atsume in real life. the original 2 cats are kajoy (chartreux, scrappy, bastard man) and joint custody of oj(mijo) ((old lazey tabby man)). and the 3rd recurring cat is jack black, my main son who is very afraid and black and lovey and is scared of staying in the house for more than 5 hours. there are also 2 brand new recurring cats that just came in this summer in the black and white kitty family: cow kitty who has a hairline and is simply trying to get by, and mama kitty who looks vaguely pregnant and has a nasty scar on her forehead and has a soft meow

Do/Have you played any sports?

cannot due to many allergy and heart or thyroid issues! however i think running is fun sometimes you just got that zest for life you know

Height?

I have been 5 foot 3 for 4 years.

Favourite subject in school?

god!! science good! i have always appreciated it even when it was difficult and think learning about it is neat.

Dream job?

im going into a computer science x physics major in the fall, but i have ALWAYS fell in love with robotics as a youngerone who got to work with them in school sometimes, and now as i get older space is fucking COOL, and now i am realizing that working on shit like either artificial intelligence or the code behind anything about to launch into space would be fucking neat as hell!!

#thank!!!!!!!!!!

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cariposa1990 · 5 years

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HELLO

Hello there, so my name is Cariposa. Not really but for the sake of a little anonymity we’re going to say it is. So this is my attempt at writing a blog that I will probably never post. This is where you are probably asking yourself then why the F are you writing it? well to be honest because I need an outlet and I really like the idea of posting a blog every week and the whole bang, but still don't have the balls to do so. Sooo for now I will just write as if I am actually posting online. So this is an introduction and let me start off by saying if you don't like medical stuff, cussing, or dark humor than I am sorry to inform you this blog isn't for you. I do not sugar coat things nor will I watch my language or fake shit I don't feel. This is my space and I tend to be as raw and honest as possible. Now that,that is out of the way HELLO once again. A little about me I am 28 years old,a female sometimes I identify as a butterfly but for 99% of the time I am a human girl. I would say women but honestly hate that word. But that's a topic for another time. In the medical word I am somewhat of a unicorn which some would say that’s cool. Not me I say it sucks balls! Big time it sucks ass and I hate it. The reason behind that is because I am sick plain and simple I have a lot of shit wrong with me. I have Dermatomyositis, lupus nephritis, ILD (interstitial lung disease), thyroid problems and the less serious one high blood pressure. That's just the physical stuff don;t get me started on the mental shit lol

So basically to what that adds up too is that it sucks ass to be in my shoes some days, it's a whole melting pot of crap that hurts. It's a lot of Dr. appointments, hospital visits, and many,many needle pokes. Some days are better than others but most days at least lately it has felt like there are more bad days than actual good ones. I guess that's one of the reasons i wanted to start writing this. i use to have a journal and honestly i would mainly write on bad days or when something was seriously bothering me,i don’t write much about the happy things because i felt like i wanted to let go of the bad shit and hold on to the good. So i decided to start writing at least once a week talk about it the good, the bad and the ugly.

So this week was was filled with doctor visits,labs and test. not even exaggerating i had something going on everyday this week. It was hard because i wasn't in the best place mentally and physically i was in pain usually i can handle the physical pain but it gets to be too much when my mind starts going to shit too. I broke down earlier in the week and got mad at God (yes i believe in a higher power even tho we are on minimal speaking terms at the moment)

I got mad and asked why me? It's a question I try and avoid because well things could always be worse. Right? But I am only human and I break no matter how strong I want to believe I am.

There is only so much someone can handle before they just wanna throw in the towel and that's what I honestly felt this week. I was in pain, mad, annoyed and well I just wanted to stay in bed with a pint of Ben and Jerry and have some chocolate therapy. But well I didn't. I made it threw the week, went to my last Dr. appointment this morning and afterwards treated myself to a Vietnamese iced coffee with coffee jellies from my favorite little coffee/tea shop. Today's pain is tolerable. Now I am going to end this here and go enjoy these little chubby cheeks that are waiting for me. I'll see you next week or maybe sooner we'll see.

Till next time xo

You don't always need a plan.

Sometimes you just need to breath.

Trust.

Let go.

And see what happens

-Katrinataimikovi

so as can see i worked up the nerve and finally decided to post this, it was something my best friend said to me today that got me thinking that i should just go ahead and do it. Mind you this was written about a month ago but i i will be writing updates more often. i just felt like posting the very first thing i wrote, so once again welcome to my blog i guess stick around you might like what you read or not?

#newtothie medicalstuff notyouraveragegal

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fairytalenobodiesxvi · 4 years

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October Update

Idk the last time I did one of these. Anyways, Ive had a bunch of doctor appointments the last few weeks and one more next week. PCOS lab work I got came back semi abnromal so now on an anti androgen/blood thinner and being told to see an endocrinologist for insulin and thyroid levels. I am not diabetic though. I got a dental cleaning and no cavities!!! But have to get a filling fixed.

Ive been playing alot of SinoAlice with a new awesome guild and Genshin Impact. If uh anyone wants to friend me on the latter lmk. Also if ur a 60k player on Sinoalice and want a cool B rank guild, lmk cuz we need people. Ive also played Super Mario All Stars 3D (mostly sunshine cuz i love that game), Sims 4, and handful of other miscellanous titles.

Im still remote working for full time tho seeing a doctor to get permission for part time return (full time hours but i go in 2-3 days a week). Will likely be told no because asthma. But we will see... my asthma has been the most stable condition of mine this year. Even then we have precautions in place and only 2-3 came be in on one day (its a team of 5 + manager who works in another room).

Overall: things are better but worse in ways but Im taking it day by day in hellish 2020.

#update #sorry if long

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mottski · 6 years

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t update, 1.5 months!

the long ramble will be under a readmore but the gist:

-i’m growin a lil creeper stache and i’m not sure what to do with it yet. all the rest of my face hairs are still too transparent to notice but the wee creeper stache is comin in dark enough that my brain keeps going “THERE’S SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE” every time i glance in the mirror

-my voice is so deep yall i think it might wind up deeper than my cis coworkers

-HAIR! MUCH HAIR. it wasn’t super noticeable until recently and then i was changing and was like “oh hey stomach hair, nice.”

-since i’ve moved to my leg, the shots have been so much easier. idk why my stomach was a Real Bad Zone but i’ve had like 0 issues and even on the times i don’t ice the spot enough and it stings a bit, my brain doesn’t flip shit.

-on the down side, it itches on my leg more and i wind up with shot location bruises a lot. worth it tho

-getting a blood test tomorro to check my T levels (and also to check if my thyroid is, you know, as failing as it looked on my last blood test. so that’s...fun...)

-i’m being read consistently as male now by strangers, probs cause of the voice first and creeper stache second

-i’ve absolutely gained hella muscle thanks to my job. who knew lifting car batteries on T would give u thicc arms and shoulders. shocking.

-my doctor was impressed at how much muscle i’ve gained :D

-racist coworker, i think, has some internalized transphobia issues as well (to no one’s surprise). he correctly genders me when no one is around, but the second there’s another person in the room he gives off this vibe of being extremely uncomfortable with identifying me as being the same gender he is. i don’t think it’s even a conscious thing, honestly. what sucks tho is that it immediately outs me. i have a tiny stache and my voice is super deep. i’m read as male. i sound male. if he calls me ‘she’ there’s no goddamn way around it for the poor awkward customer now stuck in a situation of realizing 1: this employee is definitely a guy, 2: why is that coworker calling him she, 3: oh right trans people exist, 4: THIS IS AWKWARD DO I CORRECT HIM OR WHAT

-related, i had a grandma age lady FIRMLY CORRECT that coworker by HEAVILY EMPHASIZING her use of ‘he’ towards me

-on the down side, coworker had misgendered me earlier that day and the customer went ABOVE AND BEYOND to emphasize ‘she’ in his sentences despite me having, yknow. creeper stache. low voice. visibly uncomfortable.

-if he keeps doing it, i’ll talk to my manager cause that’s shitty af and legitimately unsafe for me if he outs me to the wrong person

-straight up tho T is making me gayer than i thought. like i’ve always been some weird mix of a- and bi- romantic but wew lads. also heh “straight up” nothing about me is straight. nothing.

and now, a ramble

so like, here’s the deal. i joined tumblr in early 2013 and the Hot Discourse of the Day was trans men. specifically people (transphobes and terfs, but i didn’t know that then) saying that trans men were either women who wanted a taste of male privilege or were shitty nasty traitors to women. i saw blogs be attacked for disagreeing. i saw people being called misogynistic women haters for disagreeing. it was some real shit. then after that, although it’s now starting to fade, was the years of “men are literally horrible evil monsters” Discourse.

i’ve...always been very, very prone to absorbing (shitty) peer opinions and caving to them. i’m working on it. it’s a process. it’s kinda one of those need to fit in things where i just...agree with and absorb the views i’m seeing so that i can be one of the Cool Kids. not that it ever works but that’s what my brain tries to do.

...so when i first realized i was trans, i stuck with words like agender, nonbinary. then transmasculine. anything to like...avoid having to be the shitty nasty traitor monster. to this very second actually claiming that i might maybe be a trans man makes my brain go “BUT THAT’S A BAD THING YOU CAN’T.” to this very second.

i’m out at work as a trans man, i’m comfortable IRL being read as a man, but that’s not tumblr, is it. i’ll always be Vaguely Nonbinary but in my gut, i know i’m a trans man. i know it. i still haven’t fully 100% owned that yet though because tumblr’s attitude towards trans men has forced me deeper and deeper into the closet over the course of, what is it now, 5 years? that bullshit on this site is incredibly toxic. i’ve realized that now, in the past six months, which is good.

...undoing five years of absorbing that toxic attitude, though, is gonna be a real long haul.

so, anyway, i think i’ve now identified as everything but the I in the LGBT+ acronym and tumblr is fucking stupid

#personal #trans tales #long post #ok to interact etc etc #fair warning: the ramble is a rant

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larryrickard · 4 years

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lets get personal.

i know this is supposed to be an ask meme but i’m fucking bored & no one ever sends me them, so. also i’m kinda pissy rn unfortunately so forgive pls some of my answers lol

01: 6 of the songs you listen to most?: idk. mostly i listen to everything on random anymore, and only in my car. the only song i’ve listened to on repeat recently has been ‘stupid love’ by lady gaga. 02: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?: speaking of which, lady gaga. 03: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.: the only book near me would be all the books, as in my bookshelf. unless you count my kindle, in which case there would be no line 17 because of the font size. sorry. 04: What do you think about most?: idk. whatever my current obsession is i guess. 05: What does your latest text message from someone else say?: “And you don't have to cook it”. 06: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?: with. i don’t like being naked and don’t understand those who do. also i get cold. 07: What’s your strangest talent?: i don’t have talents. 08: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence): are soft and beautiful. meh, have to earn my trust. 09: Ever had a poem or song written about you?: a song, yes. 10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?: a very long time. it’s not a thing i ever do lol. 11: Do you have any strange phobias?: i don’t think so. my phobias are pretty standard. 12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?: when i was a kid, yeah. plenty. once my parents had to hold me down and tweeze a chewed up wad of juicy fruit out of my nose. i fucking love the smell of that gum. three year old me may have been stupid but, hey. i was being economical. also i blame it on my parents for, you know, giving a fucking toddler some gum. 13: What’s your religion?: don’t have one. former christian, which is gross. don’t indoctrinate children, please and thanks. 14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?: walking to or from my car. that’s about it. :/ 15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?: behind. no one deserves to see my face. rip to everyone who sees me in person on a regular basis. 16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?: jars of clay, jimmy eat world, the elms. 17: What was the last lie you told?: that i’m not in debt lmao. the only time i’ve lied to my psychiatrist :/ 18: Do you believe in karma?: no but sometimes i wish i did. so many people deserve their comeuppance. 19: What does your URL mean?: doesn’t really mean anything, he’s a character from the flash. 20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?: all sorts of things? and idk. 21: Who is your celebrity crush?: lady gaga, angelina jolie, carlos valdes, idk if shane madej is a ‘celebrity’ but him, brie larson, michael sheen... idk, i don’t really have “crushes” but those are the first ppl to come to mind. 22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?: nope. and no thank you. 23: How do you vent your anger?: lol. 24: Do you have a collection of anything?: funko pops? but not seriously. i mean. i have a lot of them bc i love a lot of characters and there are some pretty fuckin dope funkos. but it’s not my goal in life to have a huge collection or anything. at least i can say i have less than a hundred of them lol. (less than 75.) 25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?: ew, neither. but if i had to choose, phone. bc, you know. my face. 26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?: lmfao no. i mean, i’m better than the person i used to be, that’s for sure. (see: indoctrinated as a child, including your typical conservative bullshit like racism for starters.) 27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?: so many. i have misophonia. and people chewing + mouth sounds is definitely a big one. love? idk??? music? rain? my cat’s cute lil meow? 28: What’s your biggest “what if”?: what if my thyroid issues were discovered earlier on instead of a year or more after they started. my childhood doctor was Not Great. it took her two weeks to figure out i had a sinus infection. i was in the fourth grade. still bitter about both of those. 29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?: no, ghosts aren’t real. aliens yes. not the stereotypical ones, but in a “given the size of the universe it’s literally impossible that we’re the only life out there” way. 30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.: right, the cat. left, air. 31: Smell the air. What do you smell?: nothing? it’s my house/room, so to me it smells like nothing. 32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?: uh... i’ve no idea? 33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?: west, obviously. 34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?: no such thing as ‘opposite’ gender. of a different gender, though? lady gaga. 35: To you, what is the meaning of life?: who the fucking fuck knows. literally know one knows, though tbh. they just think they do. 36: Define Art.: lmfao how would i know. i don’t have a creative bone in my body so i should be the last person to comment on the subject. 37: Do you believe in luck?: nope. i hope it’s obvious by now that i don’t believe in fictional things. 38: What’s the weather like right now?: cool. cloudy. typical oregon winter weather. i want rain tho :( 39: What time is it?: 3:04am. 40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?: yes. and yes, several times. three. two totaled cars. the last one is the only one that was actually my fault, though. driving too close after it rained. don’t do it, folks. 41: What was the last book you read?: the diviners by libba bray. currently reading a short history of nuclear folly by rudolph herzog. fascinating, but kind of depressing af. 42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?: no. 43: Do you have any nicknames?: hal (to a very select few bc 99% of the time i hate it, so fuck you if you call me this without permission), hals, hallie bird, hallie strawberry. 44: What was the last film you saw?: i honestly don’t know. haven’t done a whole lot of movie watching lately. maybe the fall (2006). (please watch this movie, it’s so gorgeous and lovely.) 45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?: i’ve never had a serious injury. well. i take that back, i guess. in my first car accident i was stopped and rear-ended at like, 40mph. so i’ve had back issues since i was 18. usually it’s fine but sometimes it’s bad and sometimes i can set it off really easily. idk if that counts as “serious”, though. lots of people have back problems. 46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?: i don’t think so? 47: Do you have any obsessions right now?: i guess buzzfeed unsolved and watcher. and ‘stupid love’ by lady gaga lol. good omens, as usual. 48: What’s your sexual orientation?: asexual. 49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?: yes. thankfully only a few (that i know of, anyway). 50: Do you believe in magic?: no. 51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?: yuuup. they deserve it. 52: What is your astrological sign?: taurus. 53: Do you save money or spend it?: spend it :|| every paycheck i tell myself i’ll be better at saving it, but............ 54: What’s the last thing you purchased?: preordered chromatica by lady gaga. 55: Love or lust?: if i had to choose, love. lust and all that stuff is gross. 56: In a relationship?: nope. shocker, i know. (this is sarcasm. it is no shocker to anyone as to why i’m single.) 57: How many relationships have you had?: just the one. 58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?: nope. 59: Where were you yesterday?: work on my day off for a staff meeting, and then my psychiatrists’ office. 60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?: a few things, yes. 61: Are you wearing socks right now?: yes. almost always. 62: What’s your favourite animal?: cats, then birds. mice are p adorable, too. i miss having them. i haven’t had mice since middle school or early high school i think :( i’d love more but my current cat would definitely try to eat them... same with a bird. i’ll probably never have a bird :( 63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?: be sarcastic and love stupid puns and bad jokes? 64: Where is your best friend?: one is in ohio and the other is in massachusetts. 65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.: no idea lol. i haven’t been on here much recently, and i’m never caught up anyway. and i don’t usually pay attention to who is posting/reblogging. 66: What is your heritage?: mostly german. the rest is other typical white stuff that i can’t remember. some irish? either way idc. 67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?: uh, rewatching some buzzfeed unsolved for the 100th time? and playing with my tamagotchi? 68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?: he doesn’t exist so idc. 69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?: nope. also, Nice™. 70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?: incredibly doubtful. 71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?: go to work. i love my job way too much. i’d probably try to get someone’s attention if there was anyone around, and/or call animal services. (there are no canals around here anyway and i don’t walk to work and ain’t gonna.) 72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?: who tf knows, i hate this shit. i’d really rather not think about it bc it stresses me out. i probably wouldn’t tell very many people tho. try to find someone to take my cat :( i sure as shit wouldn’t leave her to my parents :( and i wouldn’t want to leave her in a shelter. she’s already done that once and it makes me too sad. 73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.: trust. you can’t have love without trust, though... 74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?: ‘sweetness’ by jimmy eat world, ‘fade to grey’ by jars of clay, ‘thunderhead’ by the elms, ‘bad romance’ and ‘g*psy’ by lady gaga (latter is... i hate the name but the song is so fucking catchy, ugh), ‘torn’ by natalie imbruglia, ‘bring it all back’ by s club 7, ‘... baby one more time’ by britney spears, ‘where’s the love’ by hanson, ‘who do you think you are’ by the spice girls, ‘as long as you love me’ and ‘everybody (backstreet’s back)’ by the backstreet boys, ‘black balloon’ by goo goo dolls, ‘spark’ by tori amos, ‘last beautiful girl’ by matchbox twenty, ‘push it’ by garbage, ‘i want you’ by savage garden, ‘minority’ and ‘she’ and ‘basket case’ and ‘macy’s day parade’ by green day... how’s that lol. 75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?: not giving out that kind of personal information lmao. 76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?: i wouldn’t know. 77: How can I win your heart?: you probably can’t. idk anyway. 78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?: sure, but lack of insanity is a better way to go. don’t perpetuate the bullshit notion that you need to be suffering to create Great Art™. 79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?: idk. i haven’t made very many. 80: What size shoes do you wear?: 10 in women’s. 81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?: i’m going to be cremated and you probably should be, too. just don’t get embalmed, k? 82: What is your favourite word?: fuck. 83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.: ‘alone’ by heart. 84: What is a saying you say a lot?: idk. someone who spends time around me irl would have to tell me. 85: What’s the last song you listened to?: ‘stupid love’ by lady gaga on repeat. 86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?: blue. then green, and in no particular order, black, grey, purple. 87: What is your current desktop picture?: it’s boring, just the default mac catalina background lol. i was having issues choosing a background and was getting way too fucking picky, so i just said ‘fuck it’ and have been using this one for months. 88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?: donald trump. 89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?: idk? how much in debt i am? lmao. 90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?: assume i’m having a night terror or am hallucinating. and be scared. 91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?: hopefully teleportation. 92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?: maybe when i met carlos valdes & got a picture with him. he’s super sweet, is living sunshine, and gives amazing hugs. 93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?: so many :/ idek where to start tbh. 94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?: i’m sex-repulsed so no thank you. also, gross question. get a life. 95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?: new zealand. 96: Do you have any relatives in jail?: yes, my cousin bc he murdered my dad ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?: no. 98: Ever been on a plane?: many times. 99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?: indigenous people aren’t history, they still exist. shut the fuck up and listen to them. build a time machine to go back in time and prevent colonisers. just straight-up kill them, we deserve it.

#me

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littleangelicboy · 7 years

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ALL OF THEM!!

{Holy fuck okay} ▪Brain: Ever Thought of Killing Someone? How?▪ -yes yes I have-idk tho -murder is hard -but for a completely different reason this reminds me that I want to learn about blood splatter!!! -it's so cool from what I know so far!!!! ▪Thyroid: Ever Screamed in Public?▪ -No -public is a scary place ▪Trachea: Top Three Songs▪ -idk idk -Numb - Linkin Park -Otter Pop - Shawn Wasabi -idk idk probably a Celtic Woman song ▪Lungs: Do you like the taste of your own blood?▪ -not really??? -whenever I start bleeding I feel the need to taste it -but it's not practically good -too much iron ▪Heart: Are you in love? Is it unrequited? ▪ -i think everyone knows the answer to this...-YES I'M IN LOVE -and most likely let's be honest here ▪Esophagus: If you ate someone, what bit would you eat first?▪-probably a fatty part -like the thigh -it'd be like chewing on the fatty greasy part of steak!!! ▪Liver: Do you drink?▪ -not alcohol-but also not in general -I have like... one small glass of juice a day -and even that's hell to get down ▪Spleen: Have you ever been seriously injured?▪ -No lol-I got food poisoning or something in like preschool -and was in the hospital for a while-but I don't think that counts -the worst thing to ever happen-was when my arm got dislocated when I was little ▪Stomach: How would you change yourself if you could?▪ -WELL LET'S START WITH GETTING RID OF MY BPD ▪Gaulbladder: What animal best describes you? Why?▪ -every animal on the endangered species list -bc I too -am going -extinct ▪Kidney: What fandoms do you belong too?▪ -Well Ao No Exorcist (obviously)-and kuroshitsuji-although that maid dragon anime looks cute -even tho the big titty girl and little boy interactions are a little strange ▪Pancreas: Favorite Gore/Guro scenario?▪-YES I WANTED THIS ONE!!!! -I LOVE GURO IN CASE YOU COULDN'T TELL LOL -BUT ANYTIME THERE'S BLOODY SELF HARM -INCLUDING GUTS/LOTS OF CUTS -AND THEN 'I LOVE YOU' SPELLED OUT IN BLOOD OR SOMETHING -I REALLY LIKE THAT!!!!! ▪Large Intestine: What sickens you?▪ -when someone is an asshole :)-and then they get called out on it :)-but they go and cry and say they're the victim bc they're part of an oppressed group :)▪Small Intestine: Any kinks?▪ -oh I can't read suddenly -I don't know -I -jeez I'm sorry -I can't read gosh this is devastating -No one will ever know my kinks ▪Ureter: Most embarrassing moment in public?▪ -um...-jeez...-when my abuser screamed that 'I molest little boys' or something in the name of a joke -while we were outside at school ▪Bladder: Where do you live?▪ -in hell-the place where I see confederate flags -and die in the 102 - 109° F weather▪Urethra: What languages do you speak?▪ -English-and very very limited Gaeilge -my specialty is reading :)-and then listening :) -talking is actual hell ▪Rectum: Chosen weapon in a zombie apocalypse?▪ -Shit uh... -probably one of those riding lawnmowers

#Rough draft answers #angelicxprowess #tw: self harm #tw: abuse #tw: child molestation #there we go #I love guro so so much #idk it makes me feel better when I have bad intrusive thoughts surprisingly

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semercury · 5 years

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this is so fucking frustrating. my new doctor’s fucked up my prescription, so now i have a million anxiety pills but only two depression pills. i know they’re spelled similarly, but i literally had the bottle in my hand and was asking questions about it when it got refilled. and i got a condescending “we usually need 24 hour notice” talk when i went in and asked about my thyroid pill, bc i normally get it filled at the other pharmacy, but i was out of refills when i tried to refill it, so i asked if the pharmacy had called, but i guess at their pharmacy they have it, so i might get it on monday.

and like.. i’ve never even talked to the doctor yet. i have no idea who she is or what her deal is. and apparently patients aren’t important enough to talk about their blood work with face to face.

i miss my old doctor. she was a hippy who didn’t try to make me eat meat or anything and would go over everything going on in my body, like i understand what the fuck is going on with my thyroid because of her, and she actually listens and will explain stuff and when i was like “i wanna see if it resolves itself” she was like cool we’ll talk about it again in a month. and then a month later, i was barely normal, so she’s like “hey, i think these pills will help you for x y z reasons” and she was super nice and caring when i was having all the issues with the BC especially since morally i don’t like taking it, but she explained that like the only other options was other hormone therapy, and it’s basically the same thing, only insurance will pay for this and it won’t cause permanent damage like surgery would (tho i doubt i’m having kids, so idk why it would matter).

i’m just so frustrated because i finally found a doctor that i felt like i could actually trust and a nursing staff that i felt i could trust and they were all so nice and caring and i miss them.

#stuff sarah says #and yes i am frustrated crying right now thanks for asking #i'm p sure i found where my old doctor went to and i'm like this close to just switching entirely #idc if i'd have to pay more at least it would be worth it and i'd be sure my doctor was refilling the right fucking pills

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stylessemantics · 7 years

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11 Random Facts!

Rules: tell your followers 11 random facts about yourself, and tag 11 people in return! Tag backs are allowed, but you mustn’t repeat any of the facts you mentioned previously. The facts can be absolutely anything! Whatever springs to mind! Let’s get started!

I was tagged by the wonderful @thepainofbeingafangirl and the lovely @whoopsharrystyles

1. I like K-pop. I’m not fully into it I just really like some songs and the music videos are next level and i’m a sucker for aesthetic and art direction. 2. I recently (finally) discovered that I wanted to make music videos and create concepts for videos, and for stories and storytelling as a job. Just basically conceptualising fantasy or real things to then make them real. 3. I’ve wanted to make a youtube channel for the longest time and I might do it when or if I go to college abroad. 4. I already have 3 songs that i HAVE to dance to with my husband at my wedding. 5. I would love to marry someone of another race/culture so that we can have a cultural clash at home and with our children that everyone can enjoy and feed off from cause i think that’s cool. 6. I have a small cyst in my thyroid that was discovered recently and i’m currently one month into my 6-month pill treatment. #why. 7. Go Yankees! 8. My youtube feed is basically a couple of music channels, fave artists, and gaming videos (Jack, Mark, Poods, Game Grumps) and my dads Rhett and Link aka GMM. 9. My parents are both musicians. That’s their job. I literally am alive thanks to music creating an income for my parents. 10. I’m a size 10 shoes, which i think is too big for my size even tho i’m like 5′8″? 11. I don’t read the newspaper, I hate it. (i don’t even do digital newspapers either)

I’m dumb and forgot to tag people so... ok @harrycarryme @cheshirepuddin @freakassharry @weeklyfangirl @canistay-haz @stylesinthewild @kasiwrites @kale-child @midsummervixen @cuddlemusclestyles @dunquirky @tigerthightat

#11 random facts tag #tag #tag challenge #get to know me i guess #:)#do these #i want to read them #i was tagged

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autistic-beshelar · 7 years

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ok so im gonna write these down to keep track of them

- weird sunburny-feeling patches on skin (like somewhere between sunburn and scraping your knee). usually either on bottom of arm or leg, usually lasts up to an hour. currently have it on underside of right leg and it’s been that way for... about 8 hours - costochondritis (although that hasn’t played up in quite a while) - constant colds/chest infections that don’t go awaayyy - tremor, getting worse, mostly in fingers/hands, but also a kind of weird tremor like shaking in legs sometimes when im standing. and i don’t think it’s just bc i don’t eat enough bc i eat about the same if not more than my parents so? idk - literally always back/shoulder pain why - muscle spasms/twitches, esp in legs atm - vision is THE WORST. astigmatism, but doesn’t seem to be helped by glasses. like. at all. even though i just got a new prescription. just. literally always blurry vision that’s even worse when im tired or when there’s bright lights which is so not helpful at work - my body has never known temperature control in its life - literally tired all the time like wtf. i mean one bonus is that i’m falling asleep easier the last few months whereas it used to take me a long time but. also i’d like to not have to sleep for twelve hours a night just to be vaguely functional - wrist painnnn (altho this could be from typing but im sure it shouldnt be this much) and random shooty pains elsewhere idk i don’t even pay attention man - hecking. um. possible uti or sth idk - what even is balance - that time when my right arm went totally numb even though i wasn’t lying on it - what feels a bit like growing pains except im nearly 21 and i am fairly sure my legs aren’t gonna get any longer - h e c k e n i n g c ram ps - what is circulation. have my feet ever known blood - them fuckin weird rashes on the tops of my arms and the bottom of my legs wtf is that about edit: - keep feeling like there’s something stuck in my throat - balance is a lie - keep feeling like my tendons and pulling when i walk - walking slower - actually started dragging my leg the other day coming back from piano even though i’ve walked that distance once a fortnight since february and been totally fine

i think that’s it? i mean. yeah. probably

eta:

- left shoulder feels like it’s sitting wrong (has felt like that for about 6 months) - left arm frequently feels ‘weird’ like i’ve trapped a nerve, going down to my little finger which feels pins and needlesey - weird tightness/pain has now (today 15/07) spread down to my ribs - breathless easily - feeling like i can’t catch my breath

11/12 edit:

- RIP MY JAW - haven’t had a cold in ages! it’s winter so ill probably get one now but thats good! - chest pain (both types) has been fairly good recently - thyroid area was playing up for a while but as of a couple of weeks ago it seems to have calmed down - v i b r a t i o n s - srsly i’m not sure how much of that is tiredness/lack of eating and how much is just. The Thing. in legs, in back (usually when sitting up straight, though not often), and shakiness in hand (tho hand shakiness doesn’t feel quite the same, though that could justbe bc im comparing fingers to legs which are rather larger) - mmm back of neck pain is like. there. but its usually mild like a 2 or a 3 i guess - shoulder is better! need to do exercises more often

13/04 edit:

- hypermobile (beighton score 6) - feet cold! feet cold! - t i r e d - also have an eating disorder so who knows what that’s causing - am currently on setraline, vitamin D and iron - back cracky. back cracky bad. need chiropractor stat - today my RIGHT SHOULDER FELT WEIRD. why. you’re meant to be the good one - did i mention my back is bad (a lot of this is undoubtedly posture i really gotta find a more comfortable sitting position) - may have EDS who knows. not me. (i never lost control) - shooty pain and uncomfy joint weirdness is Much today (still notmore than like a 3 but it’s worse than normal (or im more aware bc of the eds thing? idk idk) - haven’t had a cold in ages so that’s cool! - trying to up calorie intake - got fitted for a soft mouthguard today so hopefully that will help the TMJ

#???#a list of things that are a little bit wrong #they're not bad? like? it's fine?#but figured i should make a list #bc sometimes theyre hecking annoying #but also funny in a weird way

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milenasanchezmk · 6 years

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Dear Mark: Potato Diet, Lean Gains, EVOO/Butter/Ghee, Exogenous Ketones, and Early IFing

For today’s edition of Dear Mark, I’m answering several questions drawn from the comment board of last week’s post on fasting vs carb restriction. First, how do I square my recommendations with the successful reports of potato dieters losing weight on a high-carb tuber diet? Second, is Leangains optimal for mass gain? Third, how do I use extra virgin olive oil, butter, and ghee? Fourth, could exogenous ketones help a man with dementia, MS, and seizures? Fifth, how should a woman with stalled weight loss integrate fasting?

Let’s go:

Walter Sobchak asked:

If “carbs” are so bad, how do people eat only potatoes and lose large amounts of weight? Andrew Taylor (SpudFit.com) and Penn Jillette (Penn & Teller) are two high-profile people, but there are lots more. Of course, I wouldn’t recommend an unbalanced diet of only one food, but the point is that potatoes are a natural food and are not inherently detrimental.

I agree that potato-only diets are a quick weight loss hack.

Potato-only diets work well because they’re so monotonous. When your only option is a plain potato, it’s extremely hard to overeat. It’s the combination of fat and carbohydrates that’s so easy to overeat, and that causes the most metabolic problems.

Potatoes are surprisingly nutrient-dense. They have complete protein, containing all the necessary amino acids. You won’t be bodybuilding on all-potatoes, but there’s enough protein in there to stave off muscle loss for a week or so.

Cooking and cooling your potatoes converts some of the glucose into resistant starch, which feeds your gut bacteria and cannot be digested by your body. This lowers the effective glucose load.

I could recommend the potato-only diet, ditch the keto/low-carb/Primal talk, and people who listened to me would still lose weight. But they’d miss out on all the other benefits, not least of which is the delicious food. In short, the potato-only diet isn’t the worst thing out there, but I wouldn’t recommend it as a long-term strategy.

Check out what I’ve written about potatoes in the past. You might be surprised.

Mattias Carlsson asked:

I have a question for advice if someone know. According to most sources I find the so called anabolic window persist at least 24 hours after resistance training. How can then an intermittent fasting with 8 hour eating as in lean gains, from what I understand, be optimal on training days. It seems to me that a bit of overeating on carbs and protein during all this time would be most beneficial?

I don’t know that it’s optimal for sheer mass gain. But it does seem to strike a nice balance between “gains” and “staying lean.” You may not bulk up as quickly as you would cramming food in your gullet. You will gain lean mass without gaining so much of the squishy mass that normally accompanies what passes for “gains.”

Michael Levin wondered:

Question: EVOO, Ghee and grass-fed butter–which to use when and for what?

EVOO: salads, marinades, sautéing. It’s actually far more resistant to heat than most people think; the polyphenols protect against oxidative damage.

Ghee: Indian cooking, Thai cooking, high heat searing.

Butter: Cooking eggs and other breakfast items, melted with broccoli/shrimp, finishing steaks and reduction sauces.

Beth Olson asked:

What are your thoughts on exogenous ketones? My dad has MS and dementia and seizures way too often. Should we try adding these?

I can’t give your dad any medical advice. You can talk to his doctors, however, and show them this study where exogenous ketones reduced seizure activity in mice. You can show them that coconut oil and MCT oil—two other routes for generation of ketones—have shown efficacy against cognitive decline in patients with Alzheimer’s or dementia.

I suspect exogenous ketones can help. I also suspect they’d be far more helpful on top of a low-carb, high-fat diet with plenty of healthy lifestyle modifications.

That’s the thing with dementia: there isn’t a pill that fixes everything, or even a single intervention. In the one study that actually got major results, researchers had Alzheimer’s patients undertake a dramatic diet, exercise, and lifestyle shift. Here’s what each subject did:

Eliminate all simple carbs and follow a low-glycemic, low-grain (especially refined grains) diet meant to reduce hyperinsulinemia.

Observe a 12-hour eating window and 12-hour fast each day, including at least three hours before bed.

Stress reduction (yoga, meditation, whatever works for the individual).

Get 8 hours of sleep a night (with melatonin if required).

Do 30-60 minutes of exercise 4-6 days per week.

Get regular brain stimulation (exercises, games, crosswords).

Supplement to optimize homocysteine, vitamin B12, CRP levels.

Take vitamin D and vitamin K2.

Improve gut health (prebiotics and probiotics).

Eat antioxidant-rich foods and spices (blueberries, turmeric).

Optimize hormone balance (thyroid panel, cortisol, pregnenolone, progesterone, estrogen, testosterone).

Obtain adequate DHA to support synaptic health (fish oil, fish).

Optimize mitochondrial function (CoQ10, zinc, selenium, other nutrients).

Use medium chain triglycerides (coconut oil, MCT oil). You could possibly use exogenous ketones here too.

Bring that study to your dad’s doctors and see what they have to say. If they aren’t blown away by the possibilities and open to give it a try, I’d be shocked. Hopefully your dad is game. I’d love to hear how it works.

Lisa Chupity asked:

I went Primal/Paleo back in March of 2012. I lost the 15 pounds I wanted to lose. In 2015, 7 pounds crept on, and for the life of me, I can’t lose ‘em! April of this year, I went Keto. I track my macros, and do my best to keep my carbs to 20 grams per day, tho I don’t beat myself up if I have 24. I haven’t lost an ounce! I’m going to have to do the IF thing, I’m sure. As it is, my breakfast is bone broth (1 1/2 cups) and a mug of Coffee with Brain Octane in it. Lunch is yer basic “Big Ass Salad”. Dinner is good, too, and within Keto guidelines. I try to keep my caloric intake to ~1600 calories/day.

To add to the mess, I have Multiple Sclerosis, so stuff like Cross Fit is outta the picture. I can manage some stationary cycling, and some Pilates, with lighter modifications. Any advice?

If you try IF, do the “early restricted feeding” rather than late. You’re already doing a kind of “fast” in the morning, just drinking broth and coffee with MCTs, and it doesn’t seem to be working.

Eat some fat and protein for breakfast with a few carbs. Eggs and bacon with a side of cantaloupe or berries. An omelet with spinach and onions and cheese. Steak and greens and half a banana. Emphase whole-food fat and protein. Have coffee and broth, too, if you like. This and lunch should be your biggest whack of calories.

Eat your Big Ass Salad for lunch. Drop dinner, or make it really light and no later than 5 or 6 PM.

Terry Wahls has a great Primal-friendly MS protocol. Check out her Ted talk and go from there if it interests you.

Good luck and keep us apprised of your results.

That’s it for today, folks. Take care, be well, thanks for reading and writing!

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