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imagine-darksiders · 3 years

Note

I hope you feel better soon! When you're feeling better would you be able to write something about jealous Strife? That ask made me curious

“Do you really have to go?”

From your seat at the vanity, you heave an exasperated sigh and set down your lipstick, swivelling around in the chair to face the Horseman who stands sulking at your bedroom door.

“Strife,” you begin patiently, “I'm afraid my answer still hasn't changed since you asked me ten minutes ago.”

“Yeah, I know. It's just -” Averting his gaze, he crosses his arms and grumbles, “I thought we were gonna hang out tonight.”

“And I told you two weeks ago that I wouldn't be around tonight.”

You can't see his expression, hidden as it is behind the silver helm he wears, but you're fairly confident in guessing that there's a pout on his lips.

“And besides,” you add, “We hang out all the time. You practically live here. Hell, you've already turned my spare bedroom into your own personal den.”

'Den' is an understatement. Your spare room is now less of a bedroom more of an Earth museum, filled from floor to ceiling with all of the things that Strife has picked up simply because they took his fancy. For the most part, it's all junk. There's an obsolete gaming console that no longer works, a skateboard, a horse figurine made of glass, no less than three Nerf guns and not a foam dart between them...

Honestly, you're loathe to tell him to get rid of any of it, though you fear you might have to soon if you don't want the mess spilling out into the rest of your house.

Giving your head an exasperated shake, you check the time on your phone and stand up, throwing your bag over a shoulder. “Listen, it's just one evening with an old friend who I haven't seen since before the apocalypse. We can hang out tomorrow, I promise. But now, I really need to dash, he'll be here to pick me up any minute.”

Pausing to stuff your phone into the pocket of your trousers, you head towards the door, hardly noticing that the Horseman is still standing in front of it with his arms folded neatly across a broad, armoured chest. It's only because you glance up right at the last second that you manage to avoid a painful collision. “Um...Strife?” you ask, halting in your tracks, “... Move?”

In response, he simply leans back against your door and begins to inspect the claws on one of his gauntlets. “Nah... I'd rather hear about this friend of yours. You've never mentioned him.” Pausing, he shoots you a sly smirk that you can sense more than see, his golden eyes flashing, “You guys close?”

With a roll of your eyes, you mimic his posture, crossing your arms and giving him a glare that would make Death proud. “Strife, what's gotten into you? I just said I'm going to be late for my friend.”

“Yeah, I get that,” he returns coolly, “Just wanna know that my friend isn't walking into a trap.”

“Oh wow – a trap? Really? Of all the-” You cut yourself off and raise a hand, massaging at your temple. “Okay. Now you're just being ridiculous. It's not a trap.”

“Why don't you let me come with you, just in case?”

“Because!” you cry, throwing your arms up, “It'll be awkward! You remember what I taught you about third-wheeling?”

He remembers it well, in fact. Just like he remembers everything you teach him, committing the moments to memories that he'll carry with him until the day he snuffs it. He only has you for less than a hundred years, after all, and he's determined to remember every last bit of it. The Universe must have thought itself pretty hilarious when it placed you in his life. Of all the creatures in all the realms, the one he ends up caring about most just so happens to be the one with the shortest lifespan. It makes him want to hunt down the Creator and shoot a hole where a heart might be.

Shoving down his contempt for the omnipotent bastard, Strife returns his attention to you and lifts his shoulders in a shrug. “I don't mind tagging along. You know, just in case I have to watch your back.”

Your response hits him harder than a crack from Fury's whip. “I don't need you to watch my back every second of every day! Stop being so paranoid.”

The Horseman is too proud and obstinate to ever let the stab of hurt show in his eyes, but he can't ignore its presence in his chest.

He is not being paranoid... He's being a good friend - watching your back, looking out for you, all the things a friend is supposed to do. Not that he's had much experience being friends with a human. Or anyone, for that matter, who isn't a horse or his siblings. It's been a learning curve for both of you, though more-so for him, and so far, the most prominent challenge he's faced is balancing the line between being a friend and being an overprotective nuisance.

It perhaps hasn't helped that, ever since humanity was resurrected, the pair of you have been nigh inseparable. He's grown used to your presence – is dependant upon in, according to Death; a fact that Strife had vehemently tried to deny, at least until he learned that you'd made plans. Plans with someone else. Plans that didn't involve him.

It was only once he'd taken some time to reflect and found that he had indeed been glued to your side for months, that he realised the awful truth.

His older brother was right, after all. The smug ass.

A shudder rolls over the Horseman's body and he blinks, realising that in the few seconds he's been lost in thought, you've managed to reach around him to push open your bedroom door.

“Hey!” he complains as you all but shove past, and he – being the soft-touch that he is – simply allows himself to be moved aside. Grumbling, he follows you across the landing and down your sweeping staircase until you reach the front door and stop beside it.

From outside, the thunderous roar of an approaching, automobile's engine thrums in his ears.

“That's him!” you chirp, and Strife hates the way your face lights up at the mention of whoever 'he' is.

Throwing open your door, you head outside and try to pull it shut behind you, yet find your efforts abruptly halted by the Horseman sticking close to your heels. He ducks through the low doorframe and moves to stand beside you, his viciously keen gaze raking over the vehicle that idles at the end of your driveway.

By his own admission, Strife has always had a weakness for those 'motor bikes' the humans like to ride, with their shiny gaskets and noisy engines. But this one – the one upon whom sits a tall, lanky human – Strife does not care for.

“Anton!” you call out, flying down the driveway, splaying your arms out wide in anticipation of a hug.

'Anton' laughs brightly and kicks down the bike's stand as he leaps from the seat, his own arms only just opening in time to receive you when you crash into him with a whoop of delight.

As soon as those long, stringy arms wrap around your shoulders, the Horseman's hackles raise like a feral beast's and the sudden presence of Anarchy begins to claw at the confines of his ribcage. For a few moments, he wrestles with himself, weighing the pros and cons of letting his most primal form take over for a while, but after envisioning the disapproving frown that's sure to adorn your face should he pull such a stunt, he bitterly shoves a reluctant Anarchy back down and settles upon prowling down the gravel drive after you, glaring hard at the stranger the entire way. Admittedly, he is a little surprised at himself for the animosity. On the whole, he's always maintained a good rapport with other humans. He likes the species, a lot. So to suddenly be filled with such a strong disliking for this particular human strikes him as odd and out of character.

Then, Anton's hands slide down to your lower back and another bout of indignant fury flares up in the Horseman's belly. After what he thinks is, quite frankly, an obscene amount of time, the stranger releases you, holding onto your shoulders and leaning back to get a better look at your face.

“God, it's good to see you, Y/n,” he drawls, eyeing you from head to toe in a way that makes the Horseman's skin crawl, “I can't believe it! You've changed so much!”

Grinning shyly up at him, you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and reply, “Hopefully for the better?”

His own smile widens. “You were always at your best, even before the apocalypse. Still, being Humanity's Hero seems to be really suiting you, huh?”

At once, your expression falls and you pull a face, extracting yourself from his grasp. “Oh god, don't call me that. I've told the media till I'm blue in the face - the Horsemen are the ones who deserve to be called heroes. Oh, speaking of whom...” You turn to face the looming presence at your side and gesture up to Strife. “I'd like to introduce you to a friend of mine.”

Anton's gaze leaves you long enough to flick over towards the Horseman and you watch as he does a very comical double-take, his eyes bulging for a moment before he manages to compose himself again and lifts his hand in greeting. “Hey! You must be one of those Horseman guys. Death, right?”

Noticing that the Nephilim's hands curl suddenly into tight fists, you interject, “Uh, actually, this is Strife, Tones.”

“Tones?” He really does try to keep the disdain from his voice when he switches his burning, golden glare between you and the other human. “I thought you said his name was Anton?”

How many other friends do you have?

“It's a nickname, Strife,” you reassure him quickly, “This is Anton.”

A nickname... Of course. The Horseman's stomach twists itself into a knot and he can't stop himself from blurting out, “How come you've never given me a nickname?”

The human concept surrounding abbreviated names was a fairly easy one for him to grasp when he first learned of them. They're terms of endearment, meant to signify familiarity and friendship.

He's your friend. He's familiar. Why doesn't he have a nickname too?

"Ugh, I'm sorry. We'll brainstorm nicknames when I get back," you huff, "But the restaurant will give our table away if we don't hurry. So -"

Turning to usher Anton onto the bike, you hardly manage to take one step before a large, metal hand is sliding around your forearm and tugging you gently to a halt. Biting back a groan, you glance over your shoulder, ready to scold him, but one look at his slouched stance and averted gaze stops you in your tracks.

"Uh. Hey, Tones?" you call, never taking your eyes off the Horseman's mask, "Can you give us a sec?"

The human behind you is careful to check that Strife isn't looking when he rolls his eyes and grunts in acknowledgement before he turns and saunters over to his bike, leaning up against it and pulling out his phone.

Once Anton has turned his attention elsewhere, you raise a brow at the Horseman and wait, patient, expectant. After working his jaw for a moment or two, he finally looks at you properly and tightens his grip on your arm, not until it's painful, but enough that you understand what he's trying to convey in the gesture.

He really doesn't want you to go.

"Strife?" you prod.

Reluctantly, he lets out a rough exhale.

Although he's far better at it than his siblings, watching Strife try to openly express emotion isn't unlike watching someone pull their own teeth out with a pair of pliers. The process is slow, and it's best to sit back and listen to him rather than try to encourage him to speak. So, that's what you do, and eventually, your patience is rewarded when after another few seconds of silence, he offers a strained chuckle and says, "This guy isn't my replacement, is he? I know the bike is cool, and all, but..."

"Your replacement?" you laugh, incredulous, "Strife. I don't know how it worked with Nephilim, but for humans, having another friend doesn't cancel out any existing ones."

He knows that. He's not some whelp who never learned how to share. Frustrated with himself, the Horseman huffs and turns his head to the side, glaring hard at nothing in particular.

"Hey..." An old habit kicks in, and before you can stop yourself, you reach up to trace your fingertips along the underside of Strife's helm, tipping it back towards you and smiling at the bewildered look in his yellow eyes. Confident that he's paying proper attention, you pull your hand away again and state, "I could search the whole universe from top to bottom for the next hundred, thousand years, and I'd never find a friend who could replace you, okay? So stop worrying. Your ranking as 'my best friend' is not under threat."

"M'not worrying," he grumbles, but inside, his heart is aglow with the warmth of your words. At the back of his mind, Anarchy rumbles happily. You said best!... He's your best friend? He tries to recall you ever calling him that before. Then he realises that, no, you can't have done. He wouldn't forget a moment like that. Not in a million years. Just like he won't forget how he feels right now after hearing those two words.

Oblivious to the fate you've just sealed for yourself, you clap your hands together, bringing the conversation to what you hope is an easy conclusion. "Good. In that case, will you please let me go with Anton now?"

The Horseman's mood sours almost immediately, but at least he peels his fingers off your arm.

"Hey, kid?" he address Anton, packing his voice with all the menace and threat that he can muster, "If I find out she gets hurt on your watch, I'll introduce you to a couple'a friends of mine..." His hands fall less-than subtly to his holsters, where the silver handles of Mercy and Redemption glint in the sunlight.

Anton's face pales upon seeing the Horseman's legendary pistols.

"Stop that," you scold him, smacking the back of your hand against the armoured chest plate before turning to your other friend and calling, "Come on, Tones, let's go."

Anton all but throws himself onto his bike, kicking the stand back and jamming his keys into the ignition whilst you climb on behind him, albeit far more gracefully. The man tosses you a helmet and you shove it onto your head.

Strife's eyes remain settled upon your hands that wrap snugly around Anton's waist and it takes everything in him not to grab you, haul you off the bike, drag you back to your home and lock you inside.

“I'll be back late tonight,” you call over the roar of the engine as you begin to pull away, “There's food in the fridge if you want to eat! And my Netflix is still logged in! I'll see you later, okay!?”

Strife doesn't respond, not because he can't think of what to say, but because there would be no point. Anton has already peeled away and pushed the bike to a reckless speed. All the Horseman can do is stand there at the end of your driveway, his shoulders drooping dejectedly.

After you're nothing more than a dot on the far horizon, he tears his eyes off you and lets them fall to the tarmac near his boots.

He never notices you looking back.

#darksiders #darksiders genesis #Strife #reader #jealousy

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buckybarnesbingo · 3 years

Photo

BBB Week 37 Roundup!

HOLY PRODUCTIVITY, BATMAN! I can tell the end of the round is nigh, because the fills are FLOODING in!

Our LAST DISCORD PARTY OF ROUND TWO is starting in 5 hours. It’ll be a shorter one, 24 hours,

but plenty of time for lots of fun! The announcement for that, and some additional end-of-bingo info, can be found here.

Title: I’ll Be Home For Christmas Collaborator: BookDragon13 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: B3 - Missing You Ship: Bucky/Reader Rating: Gen Major Tags: lonely Bucky, drabble Summary: Bucky misses you while on a Christmas mission Word Count: 100

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Title: Ask For Much - Chapter 14: Blindsided Collaborator: buckybarnesdeservestobehappy Link: Tumblr Square Filled: C2 - Blind Date Ship: Stucky, Bucky & Riley Rating: Teen Major Tags: hurt/comfort, angst, friendship, blind date, attraction Summary: Bucky follows through on Nat and Sam’s plan. To his surprise, he enjoys him, but he still misses Steve. Or Steve. Is. Pissed. Word Count: 992

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Title: Journey of the Winter Soldier Collaborator: Starjargon Link: AO3 Square Filled: U1 - Love at First Sight Ship: Bucky & his son Rating: Teen Major Tags: Implied murder and ambiguous morals Summary: The Winter Soldier just wants to get his son to safety, but being human again comes at a cost. Fortunately, there are still kind strangers in the world who understand the need a father has to care for his son. Word Count: 1050

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Title: compliance Collaborator: abitnotgoodiebag Link: Tumblr Square Filled: Y4 - Knives Ship: Bucky/Brock Rating: Teen Major Tags: brainwashed!non-con, blood, hydra trash party, art Summary: Rumlow likes knives, The Asset likes what it’s told to like.

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Title: Fathers and Sons Collaborator: starjargon Link: DeviantArt Square Filled: K3 - Delinquent Ship: Bucky & Son Rating: Gen Major Tags: Violence, moodboard Summary: The Winter Soldier runs away and re-learns to be Bucky with his son. He only hopes Eliot grows up to be nothing like him. Eventually he is re-captured and turned back into the Winter Soldier, and Eliot has become a mercenary before teaming up with a band of thieves.

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Title: Ask For Much - Chapter 15: Was It Worth It? Collaborator: buckybarnesdeservestobehappy Link: Tumblr Square Filled: B2 - Misunderstandings Ship: Stucky, Bucky & Riley Rating: Teen Major Tags: hurt/comfort, angst, misunderstandings, declarations of love, low self-esteem Summary: Steve finally lets it go, and Bucky finds the lightbulbs over his head. Or Everything changes. Word Count: 1062

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Title: I Guess We Never Stood a Chance Collaborator: Starjargon Link: AO3 Square Filled: C4 - Arranged Marriage Ship: Bucky/OFC Rating: Teen Major Tags: Major Character Death, dark thematic elements Summary: The Winter Soldier is assigned to take part in a New Agenda to breed more Enhanced Soldiers. Things don't go as planned. Word Count: 399

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Title: Ask For Much - Chapter 16: Downright Idiotic Collaborator: buckybarnesdeservestobehappy Link: Tumblr Square Filled: B1 - “It wasn’t worth it.” Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: hurt/comfort, angst, idiots in love, declarations of love, communication Summary: Bucky on a mission. Steve doesn’t stand a chance. Or Bucky and Steve finally communicate. Word Count: 1220

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Title: The Groomsman Collaborator: feignedsobriquet Link: Tumblr Square Filled: C5 - Historical Ship: WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: art Summary: fanart for 27dragons and tisfan’s The Groomsman

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Title: My Dreams Aren’t As Empty (As My Conscience Seems to Be) Collaborator: Link: AO3 Square Filled: U2 - Keeping Secrets. (Replacing Soulmates thanks to October party token) Ship: WinterIron Rating: Mature Major Tags: Canon divergence, young!Tony, Winter Soldier!Bucky, lying, tech geekery Summary: By revealing the technology of his prosthetic arm, Jacob continues his mission to interest Tony Stark in the potential of partnering with his superiors. However, it seems that’s not all Tony (or Jacob are interested in. Word Count:1431

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Title: The Weather Outside is Frightful Collaborator: somesortofitalianroast Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y4 - Intimacy without Sex Ship: Stucky Rating: Gen Major Tags: au - coffee shop, au - soulmates, fluff, snow, fluff Summary: It’s snowing in New York, but the fire is delightful. Or, Steve and Bucky hang a Moravian Star and snuggle. Word Count: 1404

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Title: You Me and Steve Collaborator: jamesbuckystark Link: Tumblr Square Filled: U1 - Red String of Fate Ship: WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: au - soulmates Summary: Tony wants to have more private time with Bucky, but Steve just never leaves! Word Count: 924

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Title: A Christmas Kiss Collaborator: BookDragon13 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: Y1 - cop/detective/FBI au Ship: BuckyNat Rating: Gen Major Tags: none Summary: Bucky tries to summon the courage to talk to Natasha at an NYPD holiday party Word Count: 328

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Title: Targets Acquired - Mission Failed Collaborator: alwaysabrighterdarkness Link: Tumblr Square Filled: B3 - Stark Tower Ship: Bucky & Tony Rating: Teen Major Tags: WinterSoldier targeting Tony&Pepper, explosives set at the Tower Summary: The Asset has been given 24 hours. The target is the newly minted Iron Man and Stark Industries. They cannot be allowed to continue as they are and Insight is not yet ready. But Stark knows he’s there, has hidden Potts and Hogan. The Soldier flees. Stark follows ready for a fight that never comes.

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Title: That’s Just Me, Thinking of You Collaborator: Starjargon Link: AO3 Square Filled: C3 - Free Space Ship: Bucky & Eliot Spencer Rating: Gen Major Tags: Psych and Leverage crossover, amnesia, mind control, kid fic Summary: James has a baby to look after, but he barely remembers himself, and he has no idea what to do. Fortunately, he has new friends willing to help him with that. Word Count: 882

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Title: Art: Recharging Getaway Collaborator: LiquidLightz Link: AO3 Square Filled: C3 - Free Ship: Stucky Rating: Teen Major Tags: art Summary: My NASBB artwork for the fic “Coming up Easy”. A modern au where Bucky is a writer and Steve a DIYer with a penchant for art... “Bucky Barnes suffers from writer’s block. When he stumbles upon gorgeous DIYer Steve Rogers on YouTube and Steve turns out to be a fan of Bucky’s books, a friendship blossoms. Bucky even spends the summer with Steve in New England, where he can finally pine- er, write in peace.“ Steve paints Bucky relaxing with Alpine in his cottage, without his knowledge, and surprises him with the painting just before he has to leave. This is my rendition of Steve’s painting 🙃 🎨

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Title: Ask For Much - Chapter 17: Got Your Nose Collaborator: buckybarnesdeservestobehappy Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y3 - Nose Kisses Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: hurt/comfort, angst, morning after sex, idiots in love, relationship Summary: Bucky and Steve wake up together. Nose kisses are their favorite. Or Two boys in love. Word Count: 1236

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Title: Fri on the Wall Collaborator: LBibliophile Link: AO3 Square Filled: C5 - Dialogue-only Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: Mutual pining, Supportive Friday, 5+1 Things, Drabble sequence, Dialogue-only Summary: Friday watches her idiot, pining boys. Or, five times Friday tried to support their relationship, and one time she decided to take more drastic measures. Word Count: 600

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Title: idiotic brothers Collaborator: jurassicworjd Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y5 - “Get Off My Lawn!” Ship: WinterHawk Rating: Teen Major Tags: swearing Summary: Bucky is trying to have an intimate moment with Clint when they’re suddenly interrupted. Bucky is not impressed with what they find. Word Count: 2332

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Title: BBB December 2020 Round Robin Collaborators: Poliz, Faustess, Turtles, Winnie, Menatiera, Ginger, Phoenix Link: AO3 Squares Filled: Poliz - B5: bodysharing Faustess - U2: Bed sharing Turtles - B5: Reluctant Teamwork Winnie - B2: comics Menatiera - Y5: Wrong number Ginger - U1: Mission Gone Wrong Phoenix - B5: galaxy Ship: Bucky & Sam Rating: Gen Major Tags: body-sharing, terrible magic, team bonding Summary: When they find themselves stranded on an alien planet, Strange’s solution is to use Bucky and Sam’s connection to Steve to send an SOS back to Earth. What could possibly go wrong? Word Count: 2831

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Title: Mr. Miyagi Would Say... Collaborator: starjargon Link: AO3 Square Filled: C2 - Cartoons Ship: Bucky & Eliot Spencer Rating: Gen Major Tags: Psych and Leverage crossover, fluff, kid fic Summary: The boys are playing spies, superheroes, and guns. They're doing it wrong- Bucky would know. Word Count: 808

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Title: The Future I See With You Is My Reward Collaborator: Politzania Link: AO3 Square Filled: B4 - Bucky/Tony Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: A/B/O ‘verse, vague reference to mpreg Summary: After a close call during a battle, Tony and Bucky cuddle on their couch and talk about the possibility of retiring and starting a family. Word Count: 636

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Title: Strip Shooting Collaborator: hddnone Link: AO3 Square Filled: K2 - Role Reversal Ship: WinterIronHawk Rating: Explicit Major Tags: oral sex, humor, crack Summary: Bucky and Clint are up to their usual crazy tricks on the shooting range, switching weapons and competing against each other. Tony wouldn’t be paying it any attention except JARVIS is upset about their lack of proper footwear. But the conditions of the sharpshooters’ bets means they start losing all the rest of their clothes as well - until it comes down to Tony to raise the stakes and declare a winner. Word Count: 3207

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Title: Ask For Much - Chapter 18: Quickly Collaborator: buckybarnesdeservestobehappy Link: Tumblr Square Filled: C5 - Kink: Rushed Sex Ship: Stucky Rating: Explicit Major Tags: hurt/comfort, angst, morning sex, quickies, friendship Summary: Natasha has an annoying way of showing up without much warning. That means Steve and Bucky only have time for a quickie. Or Bucky has a boyfriend! Word Count: 1008

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Title: Go On and Find What You’ve Been Missing Collaborator: Starjargon Link: AO3 Square Filled: K5 - Accidental Feelings Ship: Bucky & Eliot Spencer Rating: Gen Major Tags: Psych and Leverage crossover, kid fic, Red Room, dysfunctional family Summary: Bucky will always protect his son. No matter who he needs to protect him from. Word Count: 1062

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Title: Reengaged - Part One: Bucky Collaborator: ABrighterDarkness Link: AO3 Square Filled: K1 - Never the Fall that Kills You Ship: past Stucky, WinterIron, pre-Stuckony Rating: Teen Major Tags: Reference to Torture, Angst Summary: Bucky Barnes knew a thing or two about pain. It was something that he was intimately familiar with. He knew hundreds of different ways to inflict it. Just as he undoubtedly knew what all manner of pain felt like. But he had forgotten, or possibly never known, this particular brand of pain. Word Count:987

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Title: Reengaged - Part Two: Tony Collaborator: ABrighterDarkness Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y4 - Role Reversal Ship: past Stucky, WinterIron, pre-Stuckony Rating: Teen Major Tags: Reference to Torture, Angst Summary: He wondered how Steve would take it, if Tony were to tell him that he didn’t mind. That he wouldn’t be jealous or hurt or angry. That, if anything, Tony would welcome it. Would Steve believe him? Or would he proceed to offer more of the same promises? Promises that Tony was nearly positive he didn’t want to see kept. Word Count: 1635

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Title: Sticking Around... Chapter One: Bucky Collaborator: pherryt Link: AO3 Square Filled: U1 - Kidfic Ship: Pre-Winterhawk Rating: Gen Major Tags: kidfic, high school AU, foster care Summary: It’s been a few weeks now, and Bucky’s not sure how much closer Clint is to settling in then when he first arrived at Phil’s. Word Count: 7704

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Title: Sticking Around... Chapter Three: Bucky Collaborator: pherryt Link: AO3 Square Filled: U5 - Boardgames Ship: Pre-Winterhawk Rating: Gen Major Tags: kidfic, high school AU, foster care Summary: It’s been a few weeks now, and Bucky’s not sure how much closer Clint is to settling in then when he first arrived at Phil’s. Word Count: 7704

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Title: we remember them all with equal affection Collaborator: seibelsays Link: AO3 Square Filled: B2 - It Wasn’t Worth It Ship: Bucky/Darcy Rating: Gen Major Tags: Referenced character death Summary: Becca Barnes always tended the family graves. With the weather so cold this year, the responsibility falls to Bucky. He has complicated feelings about it. Word Count: 2038

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Title: The Basements Collaborator: riotfalling Link: AO3 Square Filled: U1 - Board Games Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: witch!Tony, vampire!Bucky, an adorable cottage Summary: Tony is willing to do just about anything to get out of his father’s house, and babysitting a magical cottage seems almost too easy. Even if he’s not sure exactly what’s in the basement. Word Count: 1229

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Title: Father to Father Collaborator: Starjargon Link: AO3 Square Filled: K4 - Entry Ship: Bucky & Eliot Spencer Rating: Gen Major Tags: Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Nathan Ford, Families of Choice, Family, Hurt/Comfort, Promises, Friendship, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Nathan Ford has feels, Nathan Ford hearts His Team Summary: Nate Ford has a stranger in his apartment. Only, there's something eerily familiar about him. Word Count: 406

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Title: The Strength That Now You Show Collaborator: Starjargon Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y5 - Expendable Ship: Stucky Rating: Gen Major Tags: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Fix-It of Sorts, Conversations, Best Friends, Friends are Friends Forever, Bittersweet Ending, Hopeful Ending, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Steve Needs Bucky to Tell Him It'll Be Okay, Before he Can Tell Bucky It'll Be Okay, end of the line Summary: Bucky and Steve have a conversation before Steve takes the stones back. Word Count: 663

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Title: Take A Deep Breath (Baby, let me in) Collaborator: MagicaDraconia16 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y1 - Winter Ship: WinterIron Rating: Mature Major Tags: Angst, humor, fluff, canon divergence, time travel, dimension travel, WWII (and related non-graphic violence), Extremis Tony Stark, first meetings, falling in love, kissing, period typical attitudes, pre-WS Bucky Barnes Summary: Take two villains playing ping-pong with the Cosmic Cube that apparently has some kind of hiccups, add in a dash of mis-directed repulsor fire, shake well, and what do you get? A Tony Stark stuck in both a time and a dimension not his own, that's what. He has to admit, though - he much prefers this version of Bucky Barnes, compared to Captain America's pipsqueak sidekick. Word Count: 7529

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Title: Ask For Much - Chapter 19: It’s a Beautiful Life Collaborator: buckybarnesdeservestobehappy Link: Tumblr Square Filled: U4 - Precision Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: hurt/comfort, angst, cooking, friendship, happiness Summary: Sam and Nat are happy for them. Or Bucky has a perfect day. Word Count: 913

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Title: The Midnight Fox - Chapter One Collaborator: Minka Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y4 – Bodyguard Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: royalty, bodyguard AU, PTSD Summary: Time for you all to meet the man of the hour. Or well, both men of the hour, because, in a crazy twist of fate and un-Minka-ness, our two fav guys meet in chapter fucking one! This is a first! Word Count: 10,782

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Title: Proof of Guilt Collaborator: Purple_ducky00 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y2 – Innocent Until Proven Guilty Ship: WinterIron Rating: Mature Major Tags: Public foreplay Summary: Tony aims to figure out if Bucky should be punished for drinking his coffee Word Count: 413

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Title: Good Old-Fashioned Dancing Collaborator: Purple_ducky00 Link: AO3 Square Filled: C2 – Dancing Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: dancing Summary: Tony and Bucky are downgraded to paperwork after a bad fight. How else should they spend the day but dancing? Word Count: 648

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Title: Sing me a song about you Collaborator: riotwritesthings Link: Tumblr Square Filled: C5 - kink: non-penetrative Ship: WinterIron Rating: Mature Major Tags: musician Bucky, grad student Tony, a meet-cute and a back alley handjob Summary: Bucky doesn’t usually notice much about the crowd while he’s on stage, instead just losing himself in the music. Tonight is different though. Word Count: 915

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Title: Good Changes Collaborator: Purple_ducky00 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y5 – Height Difference Ship: WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: no powers AU, Howling Commandos Summary: Steve loves his found family, but Bucky has a boyfriend who's changing the status quo. Can Steve work through that? Word Count: 764

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Title: Winter Solstice Collaborator: BookDragon13 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: Y4 - kink: alpha/beta/omega Ship: Bucky/reader Rating: Teen Major Tags: implied smut, A/B/O dynamics Summary: Bucky gets his rut over the Winter Solstice Word Count: 281

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Title: Ask For Much - Chapter 20: Rock On Collaborator: buckybarnesdeservestobehappy Link: Tumblr Square Filled: K4 - Pet Rock Ship: Stucky Rating: Teen Major Tags: hurt/comfort, angst, friends to lovers, happily ever after, happy ending Summary: Bucky Barnes doesn’t ask for much, but maybe he should. Or Bucky Barnes finds his happy ending. Word Count: 496

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Title: Soulmates? - Chapter 2 Collaborator: writing-what-writing Link: Tumblr Square Filled: U5 - Dream Sharing Ship: Bucky/Darcy Rating: Gen Major Tags: Light angst, mentions of Howard Stark being a bad dad Summary: Bucky and Darcy get to know each other and unknowingly share a dream. Bucky figures something out Word Count: 1675

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Title: The Valley of Lights Collaborator: writing-what-writing Link: Tumblr Square Filled: B2 - mutual appreciation society Ship: Bucky/reader Rating: Gen Major Tags: none Summary: You and Bucky go see Christmas lights Word Count: 322

#buckybarnesbingo2020 #bbb2020 #bbb weekly roundup #bbb week 37 roundup

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thanksjro · 4 years

Text

Eugenesis Part Three, Scene Three: The Eighties Weren’t All That Great, Actually

Nightbeat, Sunstreaker, Hoist and Grapple come out on the other side of the wormhole in 1984, on the Ark, just as according to plan. Nightbeat reminds everyone to not touch anything, lest they alter their present, only for that rule to be broken literally immediately.

Luckily, we seem to be working on Elegant Chaos time-travel rules, so things are working out okay.

But how do we know that? We haven’t been in the past for two minutes, surely the current state of the present is still up in the air.

Turns out Optimus never actually intended for any of the robots aboard the Ark to ever wake up or be found. He made sure that would happen by activating the Sidestep Drive- a molecule wiggler that renders the ship completely invisible.

So, Hoist just turned off the Sidestep Drive. He was always intended to, since Optimus had no intention of letting anyone out of the Ark crash alive.

That’s some dark shit, Optimus. I can’t believe this is the same guy who tells dad jokes and shoots hoops with the kids.

The gang splits up to look for clues, leaving Nightbeat all on his lonesome, as he reflects on when the Ark had gone missing. There’d been a lot of propaganda, some of it getting outright bizarre- think along the lines of cannibalism- but at the end of the day, all they’d known at the time was that Optimus Prime and a majority of the Autobot’s finest warriors just weren’t around anymore. He remembers how he’d not been picked for the fated mission, and retroactively feels incredibly grateful for it, despite having been incredibly disappointed at the time.

On a lower level of the ship, Grapple and Hoist are poking around looking for Optimus. Hoist wanders off to make sure his mind crystal didn’t get broken in the crash- Hoist was one of a group of Autobots who had their minds copied and placed onto the Ark in secret, just in case extra troops were needed after launch. It’s fine. Which is good, because it keeps the time-stream from getting too terribly convoluted.

Sunstreaker, on the other hand, is having a horrible time. He’s just found his own mangled body, his face having been more or less erased by an acid pellet that had been fired at him millions of years prior. Nightbeat apologizes, having not considered the fact that Sunstreaker had actually been on the Ark when he’d picked him for this mission. Yeah, that’s kind of a massive oversight, my guy. I can’t believe nobody said anything.

They find Optimus in the same room.

I guess it’s just physically impossible for anyone to write these two bastards without any Undertones™ bleeding into it at some point. “Journeys end in lovers meeting”, indeed.

Nightbeat, he’s a FUCKING SEMI-TRUCK.

While Nightbeat’s busy fat-shaming the robo-messiah, everyone else is busy trying to get him unstuck from Megatron. He makes the call to bring Optimus back online in the future, so he doesn’t have to see how thoroughly wrecked the Ark crew is.

The team carries Optimus back to the future, pall-bearer style. There’s a brief moment of panic when Grapple realizes that they haven’t found Optimus’ trailer, which is also a part of him and shares space in his mind? Weird to think that Optimus’ detachable butt shares his consciousness. Luckily, the reformatting hasn’t taken place yet, so his trailer doesn’t currently exist.

It’s not everyday you gotta kidnap your dead leader from the past to fight a bunch of tentacle monsters. I think I can forgive Nightbeat for being a little short here.

Meanwhile, Sixshot is watching the cleanup of his fellow Decepticons’ corpses via Laserbeak’s surveillance footage. It’s looking grim for the ‘Cons; at least sixty percent of their forces are now dead or imprisoned by the Quintessons. Soundwave’s definitely dead.

Still got my doubts about that, but will see if those doubts bear any fruit.

Sixshot sends everyone away, so he can focus on how scared shitless he is about what’s currently transpiring.

The birth and pregnancy theming is ratcheting up in this Part to an alarming degree. Roberts, you’re obsessed.

Sixshot recalls the last time the Quintessons had invaded, where all of his friends- very powerful, nigh-indestructible friends- had been reduced to crumpled cadavers. He himself had hidden under their bodies, shellshocked to the point of considering self-terminating to save himself from a similar fate. He’s still shaken by the experience, hiding two miles underground in a steel silo, with no intention of ever coming out. He can still hear their screams.

That’s some pretty severe PTSD, Sixshot. Maybe you should make an appointment with Rung to work through all that trauma.

Up on the Conquest, General Quantax orders for his troops to get ready to bring the heat to the Autobots.

Roberts is really over here using the nonsense time units from the comics. This was before they had the Wiki, so he probably had some unofficial guidebook, or his own notes, to work off of. Good on him; that’s dedication to the craft right there.

A breem isn’t even ten minutes. Nightbeat better hurry on home.

Speaking of home, Prowl’s running in the halls like a hooligan, getting everything set up for the impending attack.

This just in, local jackass would rather have all of his friends murdered than face any sort of criticism. More at 11.

Quark comes up to him and asks if they can walk together to the munitions room. Prowl says yes, except no, because he’s already where he needs to be. Prowl, I think he asked because he’s scared, so maybe do the guy a solid.

It seems even the OCs know that Prowl sucks.

You want to be a good leader, but don’t want to put forth any actual effort in making people want to follow you. Maybe you should get a WWOPD? bracelet.

Prowl closes the door on Quark. He goes over to the desk and takes a look at the message First Aid’s left him.

That’s right, I’d nearly forgotten that Rodimus was possessed by the robot devil. Prowl’s pretty irritated by the pronoun game, seeing as Rodimus banned the name ‘Unicron’ from the Autobase lexicon in fear of it rousing the embodiment of evil living inside the Matrix.

If the climax of this book is Rodimus Goddamn Prime giving birth to the Antichrist, I am going to lose my fucking mind.

First Aid goes on to state that they still can’t get Unicron out of the Matrix, so whoever gets it next is going to also be subjected to this unwanted demon pregnancy Roberts what the fuck with this parallel. I know that Unicron basically haunting the Matrix was established in the comics, but come on.

That message ends, and Prowl, like any sane person, thinks long and hard on whether he’s ready for that sort of responsibility. Bold of you to assume that the Matrix would even be interested in your slimy ass.

The next message brings more great news- First Aid informs him that Rodimus had a massive seizure, and more than half of his brain’s been effectively turned to mush. He’s calling for High Command to pull the plug, before they pour all of what’s left of their energon into someone with a eight-percent chance of survival.

You’re really doing this, aren’t you Roberts? You’re going to kill Rodimus Prime. Astounding.

Chromedome calls. The Quintessons are on their way. Lots of them.

#transformers #jro #eugenesis #part three #maccadam #Hannzreads #text post #long post #prose writing

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bgb16999 · 7 years

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Sister Claire Recommended Reading Order

The best webcomic I have read, I think, is Sister Claire by Elena Barbarich (@yamino) and Ash Barnes (@summerlightning.) The characters are deep and nuanced, and the world is rich and enthralling.

There is one issue with the comic as it is: the best order to read it in for your first time through is not obvious. The updates to Sister Claire come in two varieties: the comic pages (Mondays and Fridays) tell the “main” story, starring the eponymous protagonist, with very few flashbacks. Meanwhile, the “Missing Moments” (which update Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays) are short story prequels which flesh out the backstories of the cast and the details of the world.

The use of prose stories accompanying a webcomic may seem odd if you are used to other webcomics, but it works for the kind of story being told. Stephen Sondheim said that “content dictates form.” The missing moments detail the backstories of the characters and the world, and that is something that is easier to do with text. Meanwhile, the comic lets us see the emotions of the characters in real time from their body language, and includes powerful symbolism from the scenery and page layout in ways that only a visual medium can pull off.

The missing moments are not really “optional” for understanding Sister Claire, as the later portions of the comic have clearly been written with the assumption that you have been reading the missing moments. If you go to the archives, though, they are split into two archives: one with all the comic pages and one with all the missing moments. If you want to try reading every page of both sorts in the order they were originally released, you’ll have to continuously click back and forth between the two archives. This process would be very inconvenient, and on a smartphone would be nigh unmanageable.

So what order should you read the comic and missing moments in? If you don’t feel like reading the rest of this post, just skip down to “Book Order,” because that is the one I recommend for new readers.

There are at least three major factors to consider in deciding in what order to read Sister Claire:

1. Pacing: Each missing moment short story flows well when it is read all at once. If you were to read each page in the order of original release, the stories would be broken up every three pages by new comic pages. You will probably want to read things in an order such that you get each missing moment story as part of one chunk.

2. Information reveals: If you read things in any order other than how they were originally released, then you will receive information in a different order. This isn’t always a bad thing--sometimes it is even good if an alternate reveal order is better. But it does lessen the impact of some potential reading orders.

3. Convenience: the online archives of Sister Claire are set in a particular way, and they make reading in certain orders require more clicking than other orders. As I mentioned above, reading page-by-page in order of original publication will require a lot of extra clicking beyond just pressing the “next” button.

Below, I discuss four possible reading orders for Sister Claire, and their various pros and cons. I think three of them are appropriate for a first-time reader, while one which might seem obvious is a really bad idea if it is your first time through. The one I’d most recommend is “Book Order,” which I describe third.

Page Publication Order

To some potential readers, the most obvious order may be the order in which the pages were originally published. You’d start with book 1 (which only has the comic), and the first three chapters of book 2 (which also only have the comic). Starting with book 2, chapter 4, you would alternate between one or two comic pages and three missing moments pages.

As I noted above, this order is very inconvenient. The archives have the comic and the missing moments separated. To read in this order, you would probably have to keep two separate tabs open, and flip between them frequently. You would also have to frequently check what page to read next, since it isn’t obvious from the archives.

All hope is not lost, however. Laura, the comic’s editor (@ace-and-ranty), maintains a spoiler-free Google spreadsheet showing the order in which each pages was published (she also maintains a version with spoilers which summarize every comic page and every missing moment). If you are willing to keep this spreadsheet open in a sperate tab, and consult it every page as to what to read next, then you will be able to read everything in release order. It will be quite inconvenient, and will likely be easier on a laptop or desktop than it would be on a smartphone.

Even ignoring the inconvenience factor, Page Publication Order is not perfect. It works for people following the comic as it is released, but that doesn’t mean it provides the best pacing for an archive binge. Many of the missing moments stories have tight narratives, and so you’ll want to read a story straight through, rather than being interrupted every three pages with new comic pages. Likewise, if the tension in a seen in the comic is really high, you might not want to interrupt it with a prequel story. These concerns aren’t as big a deal for those reading Sister Claire as it is released, because you’ll have to wait a few days between pages no matter what. Both Book Order and Chapter Order (described below) address the pacing issues of Page Release Order.

Archive Order (Comic first, then Missing Moments): NOT RECOMMENDED

One reading order that might seem appealing would be to read the entire comic first, then all the missing moments. This order may seem like the easiest: since the archives are divided between the comic and the missing moments, you can just read straight through the archives without having to do any extra clicking. However, I believe that this order is not a good way to be introduced to Sister Claire.

Archive Order will work for the first book, and the first three chapters of book 2. The Missing Moments didn’t actually start until book 2, chapter 4, so you won’t be missing anything in the first book if you haven’t read the missing moments. You’ll also probably be fine through book 2, chapter 4. However, starting with chapter 5 of the comic, the authors assume you have been reading the missing moments, and reference information that they assume you know. A lot of the events in chapters 6 and 8 don’t make much sense without the context provided by the missing moments.

Moreover, if a character is introduced first in the missing moments, they generally won’t be given another introduction if they later show up in the comic. One example is the character Magpie, who is first introduced in the missing moments of chapter 6 of book 2. When the first appear in the comic two chapters later, Magpie is given no further introduction and is not even named initially, because the authors assume that you are already familiar with them. A more extreme example is Hanabi, who appears occasionally in the book two missing moments. Her first apearance in the comic is in the first chapter of book three, in which Hanabi is the focus. Without the missing moments, there is no explanation as to who she is or how she connects with the rest of the story.

Other things that happen in the comic do make sense without the missing moments, but don’t have nearly the same effect. In the last chapter of book two, there is a really emotionally powerful reunion between two characters who, if you’ve only read the comic, you have barely seen interact. You know they were close to each other at some point in the past, and you’ve seen a lot of them separately. But without having seen their past relationship, the reunion isn’t as powerful as it could be. On the other hand, if you’ve read the missing moments and seen their relation from the beginning, then the ending of book two is among the most powerful dramatic moments I have ever read.

Book Order: Most Recommended for first time readers.

The order I think is best for first-time readers of Sister Claire is as follows: ----

Start with book one (there’s only the comic, since the Missing Moments didn’t start until book 2).

Read all the book 2 missing moments.

Read all the comic pages in book 2

Read the book 3 missing moments until you are caught up (as of 2017 book 3 is still ongoing).

Read the comic pages in book 3 until you are caught up (as of 2017 book 3 is still ongoing).

This order works a lot better for the pacing of the story than page release order. If you read in Book Order, individual missing moment stories won’t be interrupted by comic pages, and the narrative flow of the comic won’t be interrupted by the missing moments. But, by putting the missing moments for book 2 in between the books 1 and 2 comics, you’ll get all the context you need to fully appreciate the book 2 comic in ways you wouldn’t get without the missing moments.

There are some pieces of information that you will learn in a different order than if you had read every page in release order. However, the missing moments are written in a way such that you won’t have trouble understanding them if you read the series in book order. Characters and events that are first introduced in the book 2 comic are reintroduced if they later show up in the missing moments, so that you don’t need to have read any of the book 2 comic to fully understand the book 2 missing moments. Similarly, the book 3 missing moments are written so that you can understand them without having read the book 3 comics (provided that you’ve read first two books).

There are some cases when reading in Book Order leads you to learn some pieces of information at a different time than release order, but it actually works out better for those reading in book order. For example, there is an important fact about Oscar that was first revealed in book 2, chapter 3 (which only had the comic). In the missing moments, this fact is first hinted at in chapter 5, before being revealed directly in chapter 6. If you are reading in book order, then the chapter 6 book 2 missing moments are the first time you learn this fact. I believe that the reveal in the missing moments is better than the reveal of the same information in the comic, so people who read in book order will be getting a better experience in this regard.

In book 2, chapter 4 of the comic, the background artwork contains some powerful symbolism which ties in to the missing moments of chapter 6. If you are reading the series in page release order, the background in chapter 4 works as subtle foreshadowing. If you’re reading in book order, though, it is instead a heart-wrenching callback. Once again, I think it works as well or better in book order as in release order.

The biggest drawback to book order is that you have to read through a lot of text in between the book 1 comic and book 2 comic. There are over 500 pages of missing moment stories in book 2, not counting title pages and such. Since the missing moments are almost entirely text, that means you have a novel’s worth of short stories to read in between volumes of the comic. If you are someone who reads text slowly (like me), that means a very large time investment in before you can get to book 2 of the comic. If you are someone who prefers comics/graphic novels over prose, then you might not like slogging through all of those missing moments before you can get back to the comic.

Of course, if you enjoy reading fiction in prose in addition to comic form, then you likely won’t mind and won’t consider this a drawback of book order.

As of late 2017, the current updates are still fairly early into book 3, so going reading through all the book 3 missing moments in a row doesn’t take nearly as long as going through all the book 2 missing moments. In any event, this drawback (if you consider it a drawback) of book order can be avoided by reading the series in chapter order, which is described below.

Chapter Order

What I call Chapter Order for Sister Claire is as follows:

Read all of book 1 (there is just the comic).

Read the first three chapters of book 2 (there is just the comic).

Read the missing moments for book 2, chapter 4.

Read the comic for book 2, chapter 4.

Read the missing moments for book 2, chapter 5.

Read the comic for book 2, chapter 5.

...and so on.

In many ways, this approach combines the best aspects of book order and page release order. Each chapter leaves of at a natural break in the story, so this order doesn’t have the interruption pacing problems of page release order. You’ll also learn story information in approximately the same order as someone reading in page release order. The exposition in each chapter’s missing moments is directly referenced in the corresponding comic chapter, so you’ll always have the context you need to understand what’s going on.

So why isn’t Chapter Order the most recommended order? It is largely a matter of convenience. If you are reading the comic in the archives, you can easily tell when one chapter ends and another begins, because there are title pages for each chapter. However, there is no such indication in the missing moments archive.

Let’s use Book 2, Chapter 4 as an example. This was the first chapter that had missing moments, so the first missing moments story for this chapter was “The Discover.” The last missing moment story of chapter 4 is “The Dark Friend,” and the chapter 5 missing moments begin with the next story, “First Sight.” If you are just reading the archives, however, there is no indication that a chapter has ended or that a new chapter has begun. If you are trying to read the series in Chapter Order, you may not know when to jump back to the comic.

All hope is not lost, however. Laura, the comic’s editor (@ace-and-ranty), maintains a spoiler-free Google spreadsheet showing the order in which each pages was published (she also maintains a version with spoilers which summarize every comic page and every missing moment). If you check the spreadsheet after each chapter, you can see which missing moments stories you should read before going back to the comic. The drawback to using this approach is that it is an extra thing you have to keep track of when reading the story for the first time. Users who primarily read comics on their phones may find archive-jumping, as well as the reliance on the non-touch-friendly Google sheets, particularly inconvenient.

If you don’t mind those inconveniences, then Chapter Order may well be the best way for you to experience Sister Claire. Otherwise, Book Order is about as good.

So there we have it, folks! I’d recommend either Book Order or Chapter Order. I have no doubt that many in the Sister Claire fandom will disagree with me, stenuously. Some may even advocate for a particular order that I haven’t discussed. Whatever order you decide to read the series in, I do think it is worth your time to try Sister Claire.

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the-j-esther-shalom-they · 4 years

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At Abydos - Hall of Sokar & Nefertem Up & down yawn gruff grunts register from the inner chamber halls here at the temple of Sokar & Nefertem. Rocks are moved, in the shade men take breaks from market’s bustle & blaze, masons in a maze, dizzy with work for a mad son. Workers flake Shavings off the gods' limestone block stunt doubles: the daredevil twins by artisan are called, a necromancy whose mandate is to work within a dialectic’s trick scenery fit with trap doors & skeletons, specters of those who came before & did not make it through. Just a hint of ruler's visage allowable, studio pros backing up undisputed (at least not audibly) solo leads. A final comment period to public trust is given, sack of grain with a mechanical winch to reel it back when command is ex- ecuted. The first section presented just so before unveiling what will to history be visible against workers finesse, tailoring divine couture as if god attend ruler’s runway shows for the spring’s upcoming line. 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Faces modulate, echoing Limited sets of expression In infinitely shifting ways, To feel hydrangeas have a code To themselves, amnesia, like love Is for these very viewers. T hrills fill light, matter, mass Anticipation for not just a passing, But the sound bite of sacrifice... It is clear the diver cannot Return to his beautiful Green ship. His body to Be dispersed, a scattering: Why memorialize a detail here Another there, really, the Eels calibrate a method For a prize like any good Member of the animal kingdom, Barely a dance their corded bodies flex Blurring circular blinks against fish, Ribbon twirls, effusion. Sand Makes a bed for sleep, deep sleep. Unnamed resonance in witness The teeth robotonate As any buzz saw removing Fungal-prone limbs Shadowing heavy traffic. Gambling Splendor rises from cuneiform In a classroom, the ceilings of which Hold mirrors dangling like a trick. Shape making patents drawn from given shapes— Trachea airlock gambling coin & air carrier tube. Spare the necessity of value for sheer farce Nickel coats & dusk's banishment Suggestive of aging luster Madly in love with exiling others Before monarchs carry off a corpse To be disincorporated Over mountain & desert expanse. Refraction cues transparency —wheeling projector just to Skip real time with mama Dickinson. But would customer ask plumber If they really knew how to use A silver-based solder Or ask their preference when copper Supply lines are off the table & galvanized lead begin their Second century soiree? Concentricity works with a verb like swirl. Light, transfixing fire; occurrence chord Tritonal phonics opt for optics department. Rubber pupils make dilation comically elastic; Last city to fall cataclysmically? To generate a billion-dollar surplus? When watching an all-day troupe act, A student reminds me: it’s not just Parsing gesture; it’s language In its own right; it’s its own language. “Becoming light stretches latex cordage For parachute discussions, scuba whales Steeples knifing skyline, diacritical skyline Chip dip finish gloss on the nails, Underestimated frontal growth in a forge. Untied to anything: this, a king; United by belief sweetdick king. When Frederic stops by, top hat stacked, annals of paysage Artemis, cross Off the remainder of the day's Appointments, sounding like an Employee shadows that in the mirror. What happened next: art missed. Radioactive materials gotta be handled With care when expressed or moved. Like a stage, a player's habits stagger An unbecoming show, casino chip danger Dagger turns wager spins badger churns Wholesale body fuck. No. Those coins Are to be measured; not till the till's right. Sluices sink into drain, violets rainwater Runoff into gutter where parent-teacher Conferences are underway!— Amazon’s thing is Stalinist plus web pornography & cartel meth for a diverse american spread. Sand to glass. Velvet blinds. Across a face slap thing is—the thing is— This is where PhD candidates Emphasize the body, the body, the body. Polyps phonograph ear tuft cirrhosis Crust in foam headphones, cacophony The shimmering winnings raining down In a room of misery & pleasure. Gloucester, glue, metal melts on skin Like hot topping over ice cream scoops. Strap. Strange, manufactured jaws Fractured source-code error in larynx? This word isn’t pluralized with any “i” see? Coercion rivets a spur along sandy lane. Deep between rail blades, this bliss, this ecstasy to a landowner married young you say Though specifying botany & geography need it no defense. Remember to zip tie them If there's a chance they defy taxonomic classification. Accompany the doctor down to the incinerator Before he's off to meet with the research team Super fun university funders company. That shouldn't have to be repeated. [oregonian orkin man] What should I gaine by the exaction of the forfeyture? [Movement 1] Light scars mountainside in bars - filets assumed substances’ shared atmosphere - returning radiation mark’d - light laying on in a line on the side of a barge – though none of it – not a thing – not nothing (thin nog, hint within) none of it stays on - save for atom at home – moat un- scroll’d - aqueous ring constable centering city in a trick play - urn ash fuzzy - swore a radio statistician in baritone comb’d through daily spaghetti with Lachrymose D-minor most arks Mozart a gluten 8 binding in fins it t-shirks calligraphic DEX text - tares scale weight back to zero’s enduring baseline oblong song heard through speakers full of wool KG’s voice sable coated coated in honey LR help’d in harvesting from HUMVEE engine compartments - redemption from resume buttons so on all the time they froze - LR laugh backing yard & garlic & iron horses & slabs of wood & Cedar keeping watch Ruth scoping library books - Gandolph using eBay but a woman - John’s sorrow agile under- understood though though a gaggle would sit or stand with him through impossible hours - friend in Bucharest the call issues out from cellular mass but no echo do amoeba colonies register thermodynamic circles tight- rope walking one of time’s tensile steel cable lines - clouds work rote routes - cursory but heavy with shape codified jest surf syrup clot in figured may pole grain - am hurt am burst by black light excretory polygons touring a green-blue or three - audible then booking a ride 512 bus means dig out zinc from sink’s secretarial cove - look of suburban versions of teethwhite crime whose luster’s best seen dead on – lining up in yards with two-car garages in hailing DEET sargeants - boysenberry trucks & good brags - hum-mum-bull-full & well clean goes in archaeopteryx skeletal remains - neighborhood’s vale of value’s optimus primus sending in marine ex- term nation-gate pizza farmer – germs churn in whorls - ohm mite god! at last this report tablet Sumerian imitation but grain tables & floodwater chronology tabulated in you - 4 “e” vows follow’d by tomb’s odd homophony zoom rocket boost mic - scope the algebra solving at least for lost bracket tearing up during grapheme golden hour - shunt in a valve casing sausage cowboy tennis - see mimeograph mime eidetic charm! - the lightbulb field sprouts prussian turnips - nip in the bud see what turns up geniuses – wingèd – tentacle suction-cup-horn’d – morpheme - then hand-name manus - hand jest in the style of factus - in helices like peas climb up stalk & – though no time lapse accelerants on board – given time & giving time — beyond but this is where jupiter’s Martian splotch becomes a gaseous swimming hole & neptune creates a billion-note tonal scale out of its blue winds undisrupt’d - no instruments meter’ing utilities, runaway customs - cuz faith in a stoic’s a valueless stock – cussing at innocents vellum crow’d to Kum & Go lot - from a gap bodying amplitude empty between the clefs - canyon’s sounds maintain : none-of-em stay always on - records in logs – recall Abel’s speech-spokes from low gravity zone - chlorophylls postal carriers with alphabets scribed into sugars & enzymes – mycological threads tethering spore print rorschachs - gill diameter a hundred minnow fishbones – language CFCs escaped from pressurized cans refrigerants boring through air with drillbit none - no torsional force at all chemists grab Erleynmeyer just to be sure ezra-cyborg.z1 get it - symbolic arrangements from tongue to hex- ameter for fire’s dis- appearance past seek to recover its ashes by way of tale - the survival of which depends in part on the pre- servation of the unrecover- able mystery of fire’s de- parture into pieces sold for parts - exorcisms of black light pitch’d back - script with spirit encryption to be re–constructed though green-blues’ll lack ideogram or alphabet from original tongue of groups around the fire, a task thrown out so in - to- ward one of the many namesake others in drag for the day - using the name by which our loves call us :: man age game holsters cent & usury menagerie bisque detail multiplies pension - sutures pence curves hull as tug holds tight & charge goes by :: [movement no. 2] ensures barn noon nuns find between them lodged A prism, protractor, styliss & without cartography no part of it — evolving equation. tools re-visit listening shapes then if in possible way broke biscuits shared, a company of others engagèd - deuterium green plums ripening about catnip at its base - Naps lucky moment - sum indecision parietal orbit profiteering caricature well-meaning derangement ignorant in excursus forgo excuses from start, hard Hart— raid : raid ration : rationate : state rate raid : nation race ration : clay state raz's iron rate station raid: throw drain nation : air rations raid state : rain bow’d station: terrain bowl’d stain shun: ratio nation rate stadium gain : raid rations gold radio waves : save nation : everyone nation : discard nation : rat ate ionization : polite save aid : ration: come here : rapport nation : rapt gate nation: contain nation caution: raid nation : raz’d notion of the prism shift, gist & contract legal sneeze read with ease squared-off edges millimeter machinèd possibility exaction contact focal point photons lit internals at a boil - locus mapp’d then gone— landscape sculpting a— ”the sam hell are we”-- forays of alpine terrain altitudinal gains weathervane move with bot any name errs or moves with its directional intent - not one of capture but fortune’s junction : brackish carbilimades source bracket “frick” sound top teeth gripping bottom lip axel’s racket flakes of dust rust off featherlike at first fistfulls accrue suddenly your’re hunting for labor - COLONIAL LANES - HIRING NOW at town’s edge you got bowling lanes booze lot chop-chop chatter practically a legislature lube shop & a remoteness schooled to be so peculiar - part by part it ticks - talc cuts in nonstick - it’s home in the sine wave signs - “sin” - “nature” foreground give-in a laughter full - the fugitive Parthians follow through Media Mesa - Patmos - aim ame love shakes a tackle - rattles bait free - line - hook - sinker summon then from bottom deep the shelters whither the routed fly nuns around triangular prism in intervals angles just-so though there are,— some nights complications. — architecture bur to fur picket sticks stymie tics sweat wet burning surfaces collective magnification — heat tough penninsular nunery stay link’d with ease stoke a giant a jar sprouts out dirt floor con- fiscation & props lining cool glass walls pliant gymnasts carpenters with plumbing wrenches oil paint recipes catechetical erasures radical handbooks one nun calls a zine — short word blurb from a— from scene disbelief together climbs rafters tall then falls back down to ground, kink in a pipe sneaks a leak geese bleat — squeezed beatitude with attitude :: & just nowhere a head, torso but above & below nothing— as in—traction as to the arc of Orkin’s spin & stir salesmanship decaffeinated say i brief sublimity encrypted thoughtless error, subtitution, pressure applied to glib clips but squid swim just off rocky Sequim Washington but for a second: flesh silicone casters, enamel robotic limb-assisted controls— torn even so torso goes on senseless it raises hatred body & self to but bother’d not they in the slightest— mess in front visual field — gore orthography, special signs nuns a specialized structure to labor have— picking away with probable probe, chisel to chip, fine-haired brush to sweep sweet enameling & nothing one finds is said to be filed as fine by team— were there grenadine a feeling hearse on the go — cold brew braggadocio— vivid temp stations silver illness—abscess from absence stiff-arm serif— momentousness no moment us to suss us, mousetrap from foam mousse, toupee glue dripped down in- to odd-tune soup— gloop a hoof a huff hoarse from — nuns wiping brow my back sticker’d with hay, molasses to molecules hangs blurs--hand feels absent tool belt & spray canisters & moldable insect models gigantic & not to scale for effect gulp :: time slow go there a necessity :: engine — tears gasket swears bit it —snake oil that’d seal it & save the gremlin out loud denim sleeve fed, sling— is that wind? water sips from pewter tongue an audible sense of its cold lip— distant winch’s capitulation between sheets tanks out pyramid sky- seismologist over a moat cascadia subduction junction future’s figure spree spending a coin or two anthropocene gravity —(just now already passed not so much point as on-ramp access on different dimension or synthetic scrim script’d outside parameters of limited programming functions) / deter - rinse - rate - aerate - ate shunts to cement stunt landing - caught in netting, wear— woo’d by worcester, wool piccadilly robe, rhombu rocking chair : so go beams sift awl holes in the sheets still, compressed into reams , phasor hex head lag screw together a stone graph consequence charting territory old sour fig [sic.] signature :: anything new Noob — bile bite grip’s nipples got my — tips overlay / knit coriander doves hover joists cloud qualia from clover & radishes — for i but have — my gut, it covereth breast & anon.’s a favorite speaker please god prayer blankets choral quality of Is IVs & Vs their voices reconstituting body then it clear now an accident victim surveilled thought I an other but supercede —given by others me to temporary lay pain low so grave & stave to shapes may rise can’t - can’t knot - esc. key signature haze! in inner space face settles with spies charts & map graphs screen creamtop adhesive Elmer’s elementary glues muskox copper ties side tongue tasters to cheek-bit torsion of titanium bit - tighten it one nun at noon says with gesture - linen sheets set before lowering I'm HELLO — SEA - AT - AL! rummaging. wow. so. loud. craven cranberry pair justice the neighbors before asked about the nuns— nuthouse fuckbag hang yourself, save the world! nice neighbors - in silk bands the hours go tender practitioners render to center solar plexus landing strip punctuation - notes worn by torso flat float secure & bedded to carriage upholstery— revolutions per, — up scabrous reality don’t mind do I distant stochastics scattering murmurations moor’d to shroud & this fear neutralizèd a shine only is left - shirks sharks shoulders do they solo mother— sex & rage downstream ripped text- tile — chips evidentiary to story’s misnomer hovering— nuns with shovels now conical blades metallics gold only what dust does pressurized & shot through with light ascendancy high-8 tapes demonstrate salmon run sells itself fantasy turbulence, thicket gross domestic product recollection recovery - lost daimon dominion prints prison,— scratch wall border the fact of a body scarf or collar jug- ular in regular thumps swells into drum earing disappearing —calendar baseball on AM radio in pitcher’s palm who happened to be dad of a boy in a book— scene overcrowded with nature’s angels roaming moor in romantic flux on schisms rely - nuns social bulwark against this —what scenes degrade as most light cannot get through layers of dirt covering blood hares skate surfaces pools light inside & glass sacrament wine, ligature & typeface design patriot at his climax truest rendition :: gratitude glazed by grace’s drunken fender expeditional piths myths molten-core driven show true, how to— background of sirens & vehicles moving with velocity accelerating, danger (how shine incisors with the sale, no training in drama, awe, obvious) scrap sell-off from any collision floss through teeth as if a meal metal flesh together proxied by petrochemical fires — blue-grey & red with weaponries of white moonshine for a feeding step right up to drive-in theater seats endeavor letters heat-death's in leather afternoon sun driving through un- an T’s adage sort teary hullos hourglass god gives mourning folk waiting at the wake for forest of clear rings cut - kind of thing where as long as rock tumbler or track spins the lot loose - ‘’ not of loss but from it - wade in to banks whose river-marsh don dune buggies they themselves caught with tusks - walrus tusk, mammoth oathes - it doesn’t come but but the wake works - this ending up leech gripping concrete between orange sutures & backhoes frozen as if waiting for a pike from drainage grate to strike - construction project, bolts soldiers aligned With flags & settlements if hit by idiots— T-REX PROJECT & congestion— sienna lilac bogies thick spokes of upward brushstrokes suspended beneath cash register’s 100-story shadow.

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takenews-blog1 · 6 years

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The Most Ridiculous Cosplay and Comedian-Con Fails

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The Most Ridiculous Cosplay and Comedian-Con Fails

From Superman to Batman and the X-Males, everybody loves Comedian-Con occasions. The cool costumes, the fastidiously thought our cosplay themes, the…What? That woman appears nothing like Marvel Lady, and that MAN definitely higher not be Princess Leia. Let’s take a very good take a look at these cosplay and Comedian-Con fails.

I gotta admit, whereas that is cute in a extremely unhappy kind of manner, I don’t suppose the Implausible 4’s “Factor” character would respect this pitiful try at cloning. Although I’m curious how he obtained the styrofoam to stay, I don’t suppose I actually need to know. Comedian-Con Fail!

That is really an authentic thought, I suppose. I’ve by no means seen anybody attempt to cosplay a VHS tape cassette earlier than. And I’m sure I by no means need to see it tried once more. Is the child attempting to channel his interior “Ariel”? Is he attempting to channel all of the characters without delay? Does he want for an easier time? I’m shocked that somebody his age even is aware of what a VHS tape is.

“Sailor Moon” wants a shave. Badly. A minimum of she’s courageous sufficient to let the world know she’s most undoubtedly NOT an actual blonde. I at all times thought these anime characters have been a bit too clean-cut for their very own good. This simply proves the purpose. To all mother and father: be taught to worry this character.

“Jigglypuff,” the deranged pink Pokémon appears nothing like this pink..factor you see beneath. And why would he be so low-cost about it anyway? Why would he go to all the difficulty of dressing up like a spherical, pink Pokémon a extreme consideration deficit dysfunction, however run out of pink make-up earlier than he might do his face?.

“Jessie” from Pokémon’s “Group Rocket” is such a show-off. She’ll do something to remain within the limelight. This one appears like she simply got here off the set of VH1’s “Behind the Music.” On that episode, she’ll in all probability clarify that she makes use of a physique double for all scenes and she or he simply voices the character, for apparent causes.

I’ve been telling folks for years that Pokemon’s “Misty” was this man I do know named Travis. Nicely, at present the reality lastly got here out. I heard Travis was came upon due to his dependancy to body-hugging yellow tank tops. He stored going into the lads’s altering room at Goal to attempt them on and the remaining is historical past.

Are you able to think about this “Cat Lady(?)” beneath slinking round your property in search of a bowl of milk? Its always-dirty intestine dragging on the ground or grass all day lengthy? I’d lure it with some catnip to it’s scratching publish whereas I hid in a closet with my aluminum bat. 20 minutes later Cat Lady would have a brand new dwelling within the nation. I’d stuff the bizarre turtle with cheese to present the cat some firm.

I noticed this one on the Discovery Channel the opposite day. It’s a prehistoric Comedian-Con model of Spider-Man. Its extinction was discovered to be induced not by the large meteorite which worn out so many dinosaurs on the identical time, however as a result of it was too massive to climb, and was too heavy for its internet to help it after falling right into a prehistoric field of Cheetos.

Crimson ziplock over the top however, this cosplay isn’t all that unhealthy. And by that I imply on a scale of Chernobyl, I’d quite be caught in a tsunami. This isn’t a lot Indignant Hen as Insane Hen. Hell, If I noticed this one climbing a tree, I’d throw this boy at a wall whether or not he requested me to or not.

See what is going to gene splicing get you at Comedian-Con? One offended Wolverine combined with a extremely, actually outdated and fairly probably dementia-laden banana. This isn’t gonna go down nicely at this man’s retirement dwelling. I’m curious as to why a banana would paint on underwear, nevertheless it’s actually none of my enterprise.

So the opposite day, I used to be strolling down the road simply window purchasing when lo and behold, I see a few Wolverines on the counter of my native Krispy Kreme. Now I believed to myself, I suppose superheroes get hungry too. Till I spotted there was just one Wolverine on the counter. And it was hungry….

I believed this was a clip of RuPaul’s Drag Race once I first noticed it, lol. I’m so foolish. I suppose Aquaman determined to return out of the ocean at Comedian-Con. I do suppose the gold starfish necklace units off his eyes, although. And people chiffon fins are to DIE for!! I have to get the identify of this man’s designer.

I admit I don’t know what this factor is meant to be. So I’ve determined it’s that Pikachu character from Pokémon. Really, I’m calling it the Pokémon that ATE Pikachu. And Pikachu’s different Pokémon associates. And Group Rocket. OK, it ate Ash, Misty, and Brock too. Glad??

Not gonna say one phrase about this strapping, younger Comedian-Con man’s portrayal of his favourite character “Colossus.” Nope, I’m not even gonna mess together with his huge toes or how badly he wants a tan. However I WILL say this; That excellent, strategically positioned object that’s between his legs is greater than sufficient to make me snicker all day lengthy!

I do know Darth Vader has a tough job. You recognize, operating his mighty empire, managing sufficient GoFundMe accounts to consistently exchange these costly Dying Stars, and so on. However Darth, actually, you could eat one thing. Something. I swear, the very last thing I noticed you eat was that hand you chopped off, lol.

I do love Marvel Lady. Too unhealthy this isn’t her. Don’t you acknowledge the hairdo?? That is actually Marvel Lady’s stunt double. She’s shy, that’s why she’s nonetheless sporting a pair of these “Relies upon” underneath her Marvel Bottoms. Wouldn’t desire a “Paris Hilton” to occur at Comedian-Con when she steps out of that limo now, would we?

Don’t I do know you? Wait, I do know you. You have been at my good friend’s wedding ceremony. Yep, you have been the ring bearer!! I knew it. I always remember a stomach button. Or Tub Salt glazed-over eyes. So, you at the moment are a girl huh? Cool. I really suppose you look higher now as Storm, mutant climate mistress. Superman is just for weddings anyway.

I like to consider this Comedian-Con man because the Flash that slowed down. Method down. Within the comics, after all, Flash has to eat plenty of energy with a view to be all tremendous speedy. This Flash merely fell right into a stoop. Or possibly a vat stuffed with doughnut glaze. I’m unsure.

I nonetheless do not forget that first Star Wars film from the Seventies. Nicely, I keep in mind Leia. What a magnificence, I believed. So swish, and what a physique! As you see above, Leia appears simply as nice as she did all these years in the past. Certain, all of us get just a little bushy once in a while as we age. However Leia nonetheless has that rocking physique, and what a rack!!

Metal physique, nigh indestructible, tremendous energy. Sadly, this cosplay man doesn’t have any of these qualities. However he may very well be taking part in Colossus’ uncle, “Reynold’s Wrap” I suppose. One who apparently wants some low-cost Spec Savers glasses to battle super-villians and such. No use preventing when you may’t see with out squinting, lol.

Everybody is aware of Deadpool has a Marvel Lady fetish. I for one am so blissful he’s let it out. OK, he didn’t let it out precisely. These are pics from his hacked Google Drive account, posted to Comedian-Con. It’s true, and I’m not ashamed to publish them both. It’s time to point out heroes how they are surely.

It is a Comedian-Con tragedy, nothing extra, nothing much less. That is Iceman after a few doobies in the midst of a heatwave. For medical causes, after all. Very like Michael Phelps used to do. I simply thought it is best to know what the true Iceman is like when he’s a, nicely, 7-11 slurpy.

Nicely, what do we’ve got right here? I see the Iron Man animated collection’ character has by some means come to life. Nonetheless made largely of paper I see. And that blue repulsor ray coming from his has is mighty intimidating too. And what’s this? I didn’t know Pillsbury had a brand new mascot at Comedian-Con. The extra you recognize…

Worst. CosPlay. Ever. This appears just like the porno model of “Human Centipede.” Why would anybody do that to themselves? I wouldn’t even do this in non-public, lol. All this for fifteen minutes of fame? And I guess at the very least two of them will run for Congress sometime. Their mother and father have to be elated.

Sonic the Hedgehog by no means appeared extra emaciated. Clearly, he’s fallen on exhausting occasions and never consuming repeatedly. Nonetheless, I see he’s protecting his spirits up together with his well-known finger stance. Bless him. The identical factor can’t be mentioned for poor R2-D2 although. It appears as if he’s nonetheless doing the lingerie gig for stag events simply to make ends meet. Fortunately he has no genitalia.

A lot as I just like the present, doing CosPlay out of “The Simpsons” is a bit suicidal. Mr. Burns’ taped-on nostril is unhappy sufficient, however a stuffed and soiled tube sock strapped to his head? And this offensive Homer? Give any fats man only one Duff beer and so they all seem like this, lol.

These CosPlay fails solely come down to 1 query: Which Lara Croft would you quite? Personally, I’d take “Castrated Lara” on the proper. I merely love the voice that comes out of a eunuch. Heavenly. Plus it appears like he might do loads of housekeeping and maintain the garden manageable too. And he in all probability has no real interest in the rest.

Bruce Banner have to be kidding himself if he thinks he’s actually the Hulk. Perhaps he typically simply turns inexperienced with out turning into the Hulk? Nicely, he definitely doesn’t appear to be scary anybody. Not even that child within the stroller is intimidated. This 90 pound Hulk is fortunate the birds aren’t taking a poop on him.

Everybody need to be Leia at Comedian-Con. I don’t get it, however I settle for it. The costumes are OK, however why so a lot of them? This jogs my memory of the newer model of “Battlestar Galactica.” The model the place the Cylons don’t die, they’re merely resurrected. And I didn’t need to say something, however isn’t that Hillary on the left??

Mountain folks, I imply the deep-woods form, have to have heroes too. Sure, even the inbred. That is what would occur if Superman had landed within the mountains of Virginia. I can think about him being raised by “Banjo Boy” and the remainder of his household from Deliverance. Yep, raised on hog jowls, squirrels, and the occasional Tasmanian Satan and given a sixth-grade training. This one is admittedly tremendous.

Maybe his energy lies in his unimaginable top. He’s in a position to run underneath any car standing straight up. He’s so highly effective he’s in a position to flip again time (at the very least when he listens to that Cher track) and area. And don’t overlook that fantastic cape. Rumor is he solely makes use of the factor as a safety blanket, however I’m not shopping for it.

Ariel, you’re trying so…match. Yeah, actually. Did you modify your coiffure or one thing? I see you’re nonetheless rising that beard so you may donate hair to sick youngsters. Nicely, I believe that’s nice. Me? Nothing a lot. I used to be heading in to take a look at 12 Monkeys. I hear it’s fairly good. You too? Cool. Hm? Oh. Umm, no pricey. You possibly can’t eat them. It’s not a restaurant. Is that why you’ve obtained a ginormous fork in your hand?

OK, this man is killing it with the Ku Klux Klan Grand Wizard CosPlay outfit. He’ll have the ability to put the worry of the Almighty into…What? He’s not a caucasian? However what in regards to the hood? It’s only a ceramic painter’s pot he obtained from HomeDepot? Oh. Nicely, by no means thoughts.

It takes a quite courageous individual to combine meals into their very own hair. I can think about a swarm of honey bees coming for “Leia” proper now; her, attempting to battle them off along with her Nerf water pistol, trying to run (nicely, possibly waddle) into the closest spaceship or cave (or Circle Ok) for cover.

I’m questioning why EVERYONE seated is ignoring this man? Are they frightened that in the event that they make eye contact he’ll ask them for some spare change? “Magneto” right here has by no means appeared extra appalling than this. And what’s with the Boy Scout knot that he’s utilizing on his Salvation Military Retailer sheet? And please, a jock strap for a helmet?

I’m simply gonna say it and stand my floor: I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the primary 4 phrases on the signal. I’ll go no additional. So, what’s up with the new chick? What’s her expression imagined to imply? At first, I believed she is perhaps drugged and wanted help. Now I suppose she’s kind of hinting that for the correct of “compensation” she’ll pose with ANYONE at Comedian-Con.

Think about, if you’ll, your baby’s sixth celebration. You’ve invited all your child’s associates, obtained all of the presents and employed the leisure so that you and the opposite mother and father can seize a couple of cocktails whereas the brats are distracted. You rocked this get together and you recognize it. Then the leisure exhibits up: Spiderman’s Nice Grandfather. Wrinkly as all hell, can’t even put on a masks as a result of he’s too outdated to breathe filtered air, and needs money upfront. The youngsters scream, some even begin to vomit once they see his scalp transfer by itself. You and the remainder of the mother and father simply get one other cocktail.

Am I the one one who get dizzy this over-stuffed Spiderman costume? I imply, I’m certain the man desires to play superhero with all of his associates however couldn’t mommy get him one thing that will match? This factor appears just like the digital camera is on LSD or one thing.

Simply take a look at the pitiful expression on the younger man beneath. Would YOU be impressed with this Cosplay try? Hell, I’d be suicidal too if all I needed to put on to the large Cosplay get together was a cardboard field that I in all probability needed to battle a rabid homeless individual for.

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