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#I WILL hold a poll abt this if need be in the future
obeymetournaments · 1 month
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Please for the love of god, change the way you do the polls. I am begging. Please have the votes be for which outfit is better, not which outfit is worse. It's so deeply ingrained that Polls are for voting for the "correct" option or the "best" option, Polls are for voting for the option you want to win. There's been several times now where I've voted for the wrong outfit, because by brain is just so hard wired to vote for the option I want to win. The blog is the only one I've ever seen where things are backwards and Polls are for voting for the worst option. Please, I can't be the only one who's made this mistake?
the whole point is to find the worst outfit--it's what everyone voted on back when I asked what type of poll I should make. Yes I am sure many of made this mistake (hell, i have done so nyself a plethora of times on different polls), but it's fine. It's literally a tumblr poll for dumb outfits who care if you accidently selected the wrong outfit. I also feel as though changing things so far in will make people do the same thing and make a mistake as well, if they are used to how i format it right now. Of course if more people want me to change it, I will, but we're also like official halfway done (more than that, actually). Again it really isn't that big of a deal imo, but if more want me to change it, I will
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cyberm4n · 4 months
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You've now filled my head with nothing but Alastor and Lucifer brainrot. Any other sharing thoughts you have for them? (I cannot stop thinking about them, I quite literally thought about them sharing me during my entire 8hr retail shift yesterday)
alastor and lucifer sharing you pt 3!
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pt1, pt2
this was highly requested, thank you all for the love <3 im tagging anyone who asked/was fine with it last time but now you can fill out this taglist form to ensure you're tagged for future posts!
tags: @lu-ferri12 @my-anime-garden @princessdreamss @polytheatrix @reaper-of-light-12 @ambi-squirrelly @hazelfoureyes @meggletoomanyfandoms @afernandez21
cw: angst ig?? idk reader is upset cause they keep fighting, general relationship issues for a moment, smut, reader gets eaten out, there's some light praise and condescension i think, alastor has a master kink, alastor discovers he LOVES eating pussy, there's like a weird sexual tension between alastor and lucifer for the majority of this if you squint, the ending is VERY suggestive
other: not 100% happy with formatting on this but i wrote majority of it on a 6 hour flight so like. you win some you lose some. not proofread that well, i kind of ramble at times too but it's fine. 2.1k word count and half of it is formatted in a headcanon cuase, again, lazy 6 hour writing. i also don't use the bolding and coloring that much cause it'd be a lot of work.
left the ending a little open, will probably do a poll tomorrow on if people want me to take this that direction.
■ okay so sex aside i would think outwardly everyone knows you're in a relationship with lucifer at the very least
■ but it's kept lowkey with the other part of the relationship
■ which both are fine with btw
■ lucifer loves pda so he's happy, alastor isn't a fan so it's whatever
■ the public part works out because alastor would genuinely be worried about someone trying to use you to get to him
■ it's bad enough that it's known the king of hell has a new partner, but nobody knowing that if they fuck with you they're fucking with the king of hell AND the radio demon is a silent advantage
■ if anyone knows, it's charlie. but only to the extent of like the fact it's a hinge relationship, everything else she doesn't know and honestly doesn't need to know
■ she's just happy her dad seems happy and is getting along better with alastor
■ i think alastor is the kind to really start caring during the relationship vs. lucifer caring about you deeply before
■ so occasionally alastor will pull you aside, or if no one is watching will just press a quick kiss on your forehead.
■ meanwhile lucifer is always making it known he's in love with you
■ arm around your shoulder, holding your hand, everything
■ again, alastor doesn't really mind unless lucifer decides to be an ass abt it
■ look they still compete with each other sometimes they can't help it
■ then it becomes a game of how much the other can get away with before you either get upset or it's too telling
■ that's the other thing is like, the competing gets really fucking annoying to you
■ we saw them in hells greatest dad it wasn't a want to be a better dad it's just wanting to out do the other
■ and when it transfers to your relationship it gets agitating fast
moving on
■ relationship side alastor isn't as involved with that
■ but if either of them did something that upset you or like there was a lovers quarrel between you and either side it's a big deal to them
■ especially if you're only upset with one half of the hinge
■ cause like, sure, they could compete with each other and purposefully drive you apart
■ but tbh.. both of them lowkey like this arrangement much more than they thought they would
■ so they end up talking to each other about it and figuring out what to do
■ same if you're upset with both
■ not that you're upset often it's just that when you are it's usually cause they crossed a line in their little competition
■ and they hate making their girl feel like a prize to be won :(
■ whatever their solution is, they do it together.
■ show you they can get along, that they both care about you enough
■ you're in your room, a bit of a blow up happened earlier after they got into one of their arguments
■ it's not that you genuinely think theyre using you to get to the other but sometimes with the way they act it's easy to doubt
■ anyways, they both come in, it's late
■ i cry when im frustrated/upset and i think it's a pretty normal reaction, so let's just say you're crying a little
■ they're both immediately at your side, apologizing profusely
■ you've never cried like this before
■ it scares them. alot.
■ for once there's absolutely no competition, the only worry is making you feel better.
■ both sitting next to you on the couch, lucifer murmuring how much he loves you, and how he knows how much alastor cares for you
■ i hate the whole "alastor doesn't understand emotions" thing because he does. he has to, he knows how to read people well.
■ it's just he hasn't ever comforted someone
■ he doesn't know what to do when someone he cares about is upset
■ so he's glad lucifer is here, as alastor just sits at your side nodding along and gently rubbing your back
■ alastor only tunes back in when lucifer offers to give some space for the night, and a little murmur from you agrees but asks they both come to bed that night
■ given its usually only lucifer who actually sleeps in the same bed as you alastor is surprised
■ but lucifer is beckoning him out for some space.
"cmon, we'll be back in an hour yeah?" he chimes from the door, and with a squeeze of your shoulder alastor is out of the door, but he opts to walk along with lucifer. "we gotta do better" lucifer sighs as he walks, not looking over at alastor. he's not accusing alastor, he seems equally disappointed in both of them.
"for her?" alastor adds, and lucifer gives a hum of agreement. "this while ordeal has been quite... stressful as of late, no?" alastor adds, "to our own faults, yes" lucifer murmurs, giving a sigh. alastor nods, and the two men walk in silence for some time, ending up in the parlor, husk far since gone to bed. "want anything?" lucifer pulls alastor back to reality once again, he's standing behind the bar while alastor had been staring off, his mind running with thoughtd of god knows what.
"whiskey, my friend?" alastor suggests, and giving it a considerate thought lucifer pours two glasses. the silence falls over them again, just the sound of the clink of their glasses on the counter.
"so tell me, how do you do it when you pleasure her?" alastor breaks the silence, lucifers eyes dart up to him. thinking for a moment before replying "i don't really think tonight is the time for that—" lucifer says, but in a gentle tone.
"no no, in the morning." alastor says, staring down at his glass. "you two indulge often in the morning, correct?" alastor says, now his eyes uncomfortably on lucifer. Watching as the other man almost pales a little, swallowing thickly.
lucifer immediately falters, giving a sigh. "look it's not— i‐ that's not her fault–" lucifer immediately starts, assuming this is a confrontation. his eyebrows raise as alastor shakes his head. "oh please, if i had problem with it i would have done something" he says, a static crackle echoing through the room. "no, i want to know how you do it when you... when it's just about her. how can i do the same?" alastor asks, and this is even more surprising to lucifer than this whole fucking idea in the first place.
■ so lucifer of course explains some stuff to him, of course it's hard because unless he's done it before it's hard to articulate some of his "moves"
■ i mean lucifer can hardly resist going down on you everytime, he's definitely experienced but it's hard to transfer that knowledge at times
■ but he's impressed alastor even asked
■ so when they return to your room, they're a lot more calmer with each other than before.
■ that night changed a lot between them tbh
■ it's slightly awkward for both of them when everyone gets settled in the bed
■ you're on your back, lucifer on your right side and alastor on the left.
■ they're both holding you to the best of their abilities
■ lucifer gives alastors hand a squeeze before shuffling it to have a better grasp on your waist
■ you all peacefully sleep through the night, not shifting much but it's pretty comfortable
■ is the morning you're mostly cuddled into alastor, which is entirely lucifers doing
■ when you're all awake though alastor gets arguably nervous
■ but you being you, you slump over onto alastors chest, murmuring some affection to him
■ lucifer gives a nod, it's time.
■ he'd honestly probably move to get out of bed, assuming some privacy is wanted
■ but he feels a shadow wrap around his forearm, it's a light pressure
■ alastor shakes his head, mouthing a small "please"
after lucifer processes for a moment what exactly is about to go down, he's okay with that. he settles back in, his eyes on the two of you as alastor tilts your chin up, pressing a kiss to your lips. "my dear, would you mind if i tried something a little different with you?" alastor chimes, and you blink your eyes open again, still a bit sleepy as you give a nod.
he gently maneuvers you on the bed so you're laying on your back, his hands pawing at your sleep shorts and pulling them to your ankles. lucifer watches, honestly a little mezmerized by the whole ordeal. he feels proud in an odd sort of way. “I think our little doe deserves a treat, would you like that?” alastor murmurs as he spreads your thighs open. You take a shaky breath before murmuring some form of agreement, maybe even a little plea.
without further prodigy, alastors finally leans down his tongue swiping down your folds, hands grasping your hips to pull you to his face. your hands go to hold lucifers, but he shakes his head tutting at you. “ah ah, that’s not very polite princess” he chides softly, guiding your hands to alastors hair.
and alastor makes good use of the tips and information lucifer gave him, his tongue plunging into your sweet little hole as his nose bumps your clit. his eyes wander up, making eye contact with you as he eats you out so wonderfully. you tug at his hair and he practically growls in pleasure, opting to change tactics and focus his mouth on your clit while his fingers slide inside you, gently curling into your sweet spot.
and lucifer watches it all, absolutely mesmerized. he doesnt know what it is about watching this but theres something about knowing alastor is doing exactly as told to in this scenario that makes lucifer feel warm. he lets alastor steal the show, doing only minimal work. maybe hes softly cooing praises or gently reminding you to show your appreciation to the one making you feel this good.
as you get close, evident by the murmur that falls past your lips, alastors eyes snap to lucifers for a moment, and he takes a moment to think before understanding. usually when youre close alastor is all over you, telling you to be such a good girl and cum, just slight praises and coaxing. given the fact hes face deep in your sweetness he cant really do that, so that job is up to lucifer now.
“isn’t alastor doing such a good job duckling? you want to make sure he knows how good hes treating you, dont you?” lucifer coos, scooting in behind you on the bed so you stop trying to writhe away. “I think he’d be so disappointed if you didnt cum for him, you think you can do that, hm? you wanna cum all over your masters tongue?” lucifer says directly in your ear, and alastor feels a bit of a warmth in his stomach by being referred to as “master”
when you give a weak moan in response lucifer sighs, shaking his head. “be a good girl now, you can do it little doe” he says which is what sends you toppling over the edge, your hips rutting up into alastors mouth, whiny moans coming from you as alastor desperately licks up your sweet release. this whole thing was quite enjoyable for alstor, but hearing lucifer call you “little doe” his petname for you made him smugly satisfied.
after some aftercare which mostly just involved more cuddling, alastor feels satiated enough to shift to leave, before getting a look from lucifer. he reluctantly stays, feeling as you come to lay at his side once more. lucifer seems to take note of something, giving alastor a nod down, he glances down, seeing the obvious tent in his pants. alastor looks back up, slightly annoyed. a like “yeah, no shit dumbass” kind of look is exchanged.
alastor looks back down at you, pressing a kiss to your forehead as you sigh happily. but alastor tenses as he feels a hand on his knee, shooting a glare to lucifer as he traces his hand up a little. the two meet as and alastor takes a shaky breath as lucifer leans in just a little, breathing out the next few words with a calmness alastor admires:
“just keep cuddling her”
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qprsmackdown · 11 months
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what submissions have the most convincing propaganda: rather for being silly or being serious
hi anon. mod zazie here. i read through every single one of the submissions to answer this because i am insane. and the results are as follows ^-^
techno & phil fans are INSANE over "for you phil, the world!!" as they should be!! i, too, read bunfloras' phil & techno fics. but even if i didnt already know who emeraldduo was, you all have VERY GOOD propaganda. Immortal lifelong best friends... <3
dsmp fans i love you im holding out my hand to you in a gesture of friendship. hello. both mods are also mcyt fans and dsmp fans. we know abt characters vs ccs. we also despise cc!dream. you are safe here. im sorry that previous polls have traumatized you :((
c!tubbo/c!ranboo fans also fucking turned out you have VERY convincing propaganda
ive never read the locked tomb, know nothing of the characters, but to the submitters who sent in Camilla Hect and Palamedes Sextus youve convinced me. VERY good job. where can i find your media i need to learn more. no like fr
jrwi fans are you okay. good lord /pos. also youll be pleased to know WE HAVE NOT ONE BUT TWO SUBMISSIONS OF THE GREATER MANA POLYCULE
to the etho/skizz fan who submitted an essay. hi. i think youre so right for putting them in a httyd au. very convincing propaganda. also are you okay.
hi silmarillion fans. do you need hot cocoa.
jrwi fans are literally so not normal about their guys. sorry to call you out but oh my god not a single one of you is normal /pos. its great.
not a fnaf fan but "Theyre also both canonically queer, if that helps. That has nothing to do with the lobotomies or the dying and being revived as a soulless walking corpse, though." is the sentence of all time. i hope whoever wrote that is doing well.
good evening to the homestuck fan who wrote jake & dirk propaganda so convincing that for a moment i wanted to go check out their media only to remember its Homestuck and ONLY to the homestuck fan who wrote jake & dirk propaganda so convincing that for a moment i wanted to go check out their media only to remember its Homestuck.
we've been over the jesus christ/mary magdalene submission but did you know apparently there's actual evidence to back it up? lots of it in fact? i did not expect to read that tonight (for future reference slash in case you're curious i am an atheist & cycad is christian)
the little women fan has some SERIOUS propaganda. my respect o7
hello to the autistic sp (south park) fan who wrote a genuine essay on kenny mccormick and eric cartman. wish you well (and like, we got a voltron submission as well. i dont know either of those shows/fandoms at all besides vague knowledge that they're not great but eh we're here to have fun. who cares (this is in response to you mentioning you didnt know if sp was allowed (i dont know actually youd have to ask cycad but im like 95% sure its fine (can you tell i have adhd))))
GIGOLAS FAN SPOTTED. they didnt write a lot of propaganda but HELL YEAH WE GOT SOME LOTR FANS HERE. theyre so qpr to me you dont even KNOW
i didnt even think about link/zelda being a qpr before this but you have convinced me. youre so right. they Are
besties who drink poison together STAY together!!! (merlin and arthur). fuck yeah baby!!! i have never seen merlin bbc
oh moirails are a homestuck thing i saw those in our asks and was unsure what they were
CANON QPR IN FABLE SMP? oh i need to check that out. fable smp fans ik this is a long shot but if anyone wants to give me reccomendations for where to start watching.
hiya qsmp fans. no need to worry you have turned out in both numbers AND propaganda. wowzers.
we have One submission for q!quackbur but now im wondering why no one has submitted c!quackbur. theyre literally homoeretic business rivals whose relationship could be viewed as platonic or romantic. smh
Roman and Youngblood from Roleslaying with Roman have very dedicated fans.
divorce quartet the divorced qp polycule ever but also im very biased. (both scott/cleo and scott/martyn were submitted multiple times)
we have some very fun ocs & real life qp relationships and im so here for it.
oh hey lifesteal smp i know those guys. wow damn theyre kinda fucked up arent they.
POLYARCHIVES SUPREMACY <3 BASEDBASEDBASED
POLYMECHS SUPREMACY ALSO SO BASED
Hi. Person who submitted both jesus/mary magdalene and now hamlet/ophelia. I love you. You are here to cause CHAOS and i for one applaud you for it. Can we kiss /j
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pocketramblr · 3 years
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Poll Results
Alright, that’s it, i’m tired of trying to sort the answers so yall just get the big list of all the free response answers to that quiz about ofa. be aware some are less safe for work than others.
memorable ones: OfA Snickerdoodle, I’d Give It To A Cat, So You Know Vore Right?, I’m in Love With Nana, Slicey Blood Oath, and Homoerotic Sword Fight
(My answer above is how I think it did happen, not how I want it to happen.) I personally think something along the lines of a Bruce Banner Jennifer Walker blood transfusion where the OFA holder doesn’t realize they’ve passed it on until later.
a tender kiss. perhaps loving. perhaps they're dying, and i already knew that they loved me, either platonically or otherwise, and we always knew that i'd be next. perhaps they tried so hard to make sure it never happened, and perhaps that tender kiss as an apology as much as it is a gift. sure sucks to be gay i guess 
Peacefully? By doing the do and making it a wonderful moment of lovemaking and passing on the future.. If we're in the middle of battle you bet your freaking butt I want them to kiss me dramatically, tell me they love me, and then yeet me away as they turn back to the fight. Ow but relationship goals. 
If we're not romantic because I am obsessed with the Duo Holders ship currently, blood works fine. Ingest it or have them pressing a bloody palm into a wound of mine *shrugs* Gotta pass it along somehow
Personally, I'd rather drink blood instead of hair. It feels less gross. But I'd pass it on as hair just to fuck with my successor
Hair or blood eating, but no touchy-touchy or whatever thx.
Probably a vial of blood so it’s easy and over quick
kiss 👉👈
i would like it to be blood from an already opened wound just cause it would probably less weird, ..........but knowing my luck and because irl my sister has attempted to feed me her baby teeth by shoving it to my lips and saying "eat", thats actually how i would get ofa. ( >:/ i have almost eaten at least two teeth this way because i thought she was being nice and giving me candy )
Consider: doing one of those blood oath things where you swear to be BFFs for eternity except now you also get a quirk out of it. But lbr kissing is way more romantic and you’ve made First/Second my new OTP, so I’ll stick with that for them. <3 But also, maybe to make the kiss option more romantic First thought something more along the lines of wishing he could give ~everything he has/all of himself~ to Second which counted as including his quirk, rather than specifically about giving him the power to defeat his brother?
This is going to sound gross but all ways of transferring DNA is. Just work up a sweat and have the other party drink it. It would probably be the best tasting option which is kinda a weird thing to think about. Nvm sweat doesn't contain DNA looked it up but I don't want to delete all of this so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ maybe a scraping of skin cells
Honestly the hair is probably the way I'd want to go. That or blood. Like just swallowing it.
Look, i know realistically it was probably some desparate on-the-brink-of-death "please defeat my brother" thing and oo, magic he gets the quirk. But consider. First's last fight with afo. Second is holding his bleeding body, crying. First gently cups Second's cheek and pulls him into a bloody kiss before dying. Second pulls himself together just long enough to flip off afo, barely resisting the urge to absolutely slaughter him, knowing he would lose. He finds his successor and trains him to the best of his ability, determined to not lose another person he cared for
I mean like dead skin cells probably dont work right? Except hair works so thats not true. So like you totally could lick someone to get OFA. Like could you imagine the whole holding your hand over someones mouth to shut them up but they lick you and they somehow wind up with your quirk, like crazy. What must have been the trial and error with this stuff cause they must have kept passing it inbetween each other to figure out its dna right. How long did it take for them to realize. Like you’re eating breakfast and theres a hair in your food like ew and why am i stronger now. Overall, comedic timing for getting a quirk would be hilarious.
My apprentice lays broken and bloody beneath me as I cradle them in my arms, crying on to an open wound on their face praying the power will be enough to save them
little bit of skin like a hang nail just like put it in a sandwich and dont thing about it
Put it in my coffee.
If I received it from Nana then I would love to have received it via eating her out~ though for passing it on to others I think I would just either spit into their mouths or shove a bleeding finger down their throat until they swallow and then run and get myself killed by AfO while taunting him with "I DON'T HAVE YOUR BROTHER'S QUIRK ANYMORE! SUCK MY NON-EXISTENT DICK YOU LOSER!"
knock me out and just inject the blood. if i have to actively think abt ingesting someone elses dna im gonna yeet myself into the ocean. to pass it on i'll just spit in a cup (or in their mouth) bc im not gonna make someone eat my hair nor is anyone getting my blood
who in their right mind would trust me with a power like ofa 💀afo just looks at me funny the quirk is his. im not a mc for a reason
Sexy battle where I’m the villain, and randomly the hero thinks “I wish I could save you”. Boom I punch them with bloody knuckles and the quirk passes to me. Now the hero has to teach me how to be good again. Also we fall in love.
You know, I always assumed I would head canon it as something romantic until canon proved me wrong But these options are so varied - I had to choose the most Dramatic (tm) one As for my actual answer: a gentle kiss with full consent from both parties
I will bite a holder as a sign of affection. There's probably some dead skin cells in the arm I can swallow by accident. They are used to this and sometimes we switch the quirk around for funsies.
You know, I spent like 10 minutes trying to think of something original here, but knowing my shit luck some bastard would spit in my drink or something and cast upon me the Curse of Bone Breaking and/or.... y’know..... AFO...........
okay this is gonna sound weird but. consider this i marry a very lovely women. we are in much love. we get attacked by evil people because she is a good hero but plot twist. i am secretly her nemisis. the attackers are my minions. i wanted her to protect me because i am very smol but. my comrades were too mean. she is nearly dead. "take this" she says. she kisses me and i am one for all. fuck, i say internally, but i dont tell her. she dies in my arms. i run and become vigilante and take down my once comrades. all is not well. i die unsatisfied. i eventually pass it onto a cat in an alleyway because they are the only one who is with me when i get hit with a back alley sniper
Blood or just like. skin. You could use nail clippers to take a bit off from a really fleshy area, like just under the nail. It's that easy
Spit in my food like an underpaid fast food worker.
i have long hair so that would not be ideal, but blood seems kinda...unsanitary, but i guess it would be better if i was 100% positive i wouldn't pass on some sort of disease. so if that could be ascertained then like a few drops of blood in a glass of water or something and then down the hatch, bam ofa passed on. i know other folks are probably typing some nsfw stuff but just. no. keep it in your pants y'all.
Blood transfusion First, pick a hospital Second, steal all their blood Third, have the previous user donate their blood to that hospital Fourth, get into a major accident and need a blood transfusion near the hospital you robbed Fifth, hope either OfA will only pass onto you bc your the intended recipient, or that no one else needs a blood transfusion Sixth, get the transfusion Seventh, steal all of the previous users blood back Eigth, return all the other stolen blood Ninth, get new identities, this crime leaves DNA everywhere Tenth, die of a blood clot due to incompatible blood types (optional)
okay realistically bleeding into a cut or a drop of blood into water and drinking it would be easiest but like... what if somehow dna could be baked into like a muffin or cookie or something... like i know when cooking with wines and stuff the alcohol cooks away and evaporates out but is that process the same for like blood? like if you baked your blood into a cookie would traces of your dna still be there? basically i want an ofa cookie (snickerdoodle preferably)
no i like my bones
drink a drop of blood. it'd go down easier than hair
no
Something dramatic and desperate in the heat of battle like blood or something
First of all, I think First passed OfA as he was dying entirely on accident, because Second was badly (though not critically) injured and they'd been sort of dancing around each other's feelings and doubting their own worth, so First, knowing he was dying and that his brother was a petty bitch who would probably kill Second anyway because he knows that First cared about him, kisses Second with blood on his lips and his last thoughts before dying are about how he wants Second to have the strength to survive if his brother comes after him.
If I was given the option of getting OfA, I wouldn't take it. I'm a coward and being given something like that is a death sentence.
If it was forced, probably ingesting the previous users blood, because blood is a lot easier to choke down than hair.
If I already had it and had to pass it on, I would want it to be something suitably dramatic like collapsing on the doorstep of a trusted loved one and explaining with my dying breath who killed me and why and then raising my blood covered hand to their face like I was going to caress their cheek only for them to taste blood. They cry and try to get me take it back and when I finally die they swear vengeance over my slowly cooling corpse.
Pass it on in a non-life threatening scenario where I decide I actually don’t like the weird bone breaking power a random person gave me as they were dying and wish I could pass it to someone else and through a weird set of circumstances end up accidentally cooking some of my own hair into brownies I was making because I shed like a dog and passing it to my new neighbor I came to welcome to the neighborhood.
Either drinking a glass of milk with their saliva (no icky hair taste), or an epic sharing of blood while clasping hands like knights in a noble brotherhood!
not by eating all mights long ass hair thats for sure, why did he give midoriya one of the longest ones he had, he has shorter hair right there on the back of his head. not to mention the fact of like how i would prefer to recieve it or give it away which would be just, fucking sharing a pop or something and swaping it through the backwash??? less nasty than hair and not as weird as the other options for spit which is like straight up spitting in a drink or the other persons mouth outside of kissing. if someone told me i had to eat their hair i would straight up say no thanks, cheers for the fitness glow up tho homie
I want nana 2 kiss me, on.,, the m,,,.."#*(@÷out.h pretty lady.,
Q-tip to the inside of the cheek
Those blood pacts where you slice your hands open and do a little handshake thing. Not very creative, but idk it just appeals to me
Via consumption of blood, babey
I would want it to be with a maybe maybe not homoerotic sword fight in a Wendy's parking lot, preferably while we are both being impaled on each other's swords. The sweet pain of almost dying is a very intense moment to share isn't it?
Sweet love
Hair
If it's someone cute, a kiss. Otherwise I'd probably just swallow a hair with some water.
i'd just like. spit in their water bottle. if thats not enough dna i guess licking a paper cut it is. hair is bad idwa bc it doesn't digest and can get wrapped up in things. and like. im too aroace for kissing and such
Last option, cause first is sexy as hell
okay you know what vore is, right. and you know how blood and organ transfusions work? well...
Not at all, like?? I enjoy being alive and not having my body destroyed thank you. Literally everyone with OfA died young-ish or has suffered debilitating injuries bc of it. Like Midoriya's bones are powder, and we don't even need to go into All Might's medical history. Like thanks but no thanks no freaky dna ingestion 4 me
Had a open cut from a can lid and ofa holder had an open cut. While lamenting about fins a successor.
Blood
Assuming we can bypass the rules of canon, it would be funny as fuck is OFA was passed on by intentional physical contact. So yes, a smooch for First and Second (and Second and Third) but also. Bitchslap of destiny. Nana giving her protege one last hug. All Might ruffles Mido’s hair like a dad to pass it on. I’m sure you get it
Bleeding over an open wound
lil bit of spit in a milkshake.
I hold their hand Platonically but it's summer and we're both sweaty and they're a little loopy and having weird thoughts due to dehydration and heat lmao, literally hanging around anyone for any extended period of time guarantees you accidentally ingest SOME of their dna. Dead skin cells are floating through the air ~constantly~ and if you have a friend I promise you've inhaled their dead skin cells before. Have fun with that knowledge!!
ok so like deffo a kiss, but in canon people get weird biological urges for using their quirks, like bby Toga drinking bird blood. First has had a LOT of "spit in their drink" intrusive thoughts over the years. immediately post first-kiss he is mystified that his intrusive thoughts have disappeared entirely, but then BAM it seems that second has the stockpile now, and with it, a preoccupation with vampire lore
drink from the same water bottle?
“EAT THIS!”
Pass it on by making them lick my arm because that would make them rly uncomfortable, passed to me by spiting in my 20oz Red Bull and then chugging it
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wilccard · 4 years
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☺ ♣ ♥ !! ☼ ?? ► ↕
                                     ( modern au ) ::: accepting.
☺ for a loving/affectionate text 
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  when did we turn into the third floor gays that buy flowers and leave them on the window sill for ages? 🙄
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  several poets would be disappointed in us. i won’t bother listing them here.😒 just buy new flowers THE ONES THAT DON’T DIE.
♣ for a drunk text
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  [ SPEECH TO TEXT ] hello babe why is your family cruella de vil. ville. veel? how do you spell
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  i’m getting grilled for no fuckjng sreason. Reason. why do they know my motherss name??? something abt? her not finishing college? fucking ell
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  HOW AM I AT UR FAMILY PARTY BEFROE YOU...! GET HERE 🤡
♥ for a sexual/naughty text 
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  oh my god, august, the things that does to me.
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  [ VIDEO 03:38 ]
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  okay, longer than usual, but. what’s the point in having a bathroom mirror if not this. ALSO, USE HEADPHONES. EXPLICIT DESCRIPTIONS AHEAD.
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  if you use this to destroy my nonexistent political career (since my life is an appendage to yours at this point, no jk) at least take it to the finish line
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]] [ IMAGE ] yea btw we need to clean the bathroom mirror.
!! for a threatening text 
[[  sutherlandslide. ]]  [ 2018 ] [ drafted ] i cannot believe you’d pull this stunt. what’s the point in bringing him to the dorm room, you absolute idiot, you have a condo in the city. yOU LEFT THE DOOR OPEN. OF COURSE I’D WALK IN ON YOU TWO. you’d think i?? what, wouldn’t catch on? wouldn’t see through the paperthinfuckingveil of it? I AM NOT BLOODY TWELVE. I’M A POLI SCI MAJOR THIS IS LIKE... COLD WAR TACTICS 101. i cannot believe you’d use up and break the heart of some random bloke just to prove a point - people are people you absolute fucking brat. you spoiled, silverspoon asshole. shit like this, august? it’s exactly the reason i need to go. i just... need some time away. a world that doesn’t revolve around this will-they-wont-they we keep doing.
☼ for a morning text 
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  it’s like i woke up and i no longer know who i am
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  or as if i just found out. yea, definitely the latter
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  cannot believe it took us this long to do this. mostly me, but shush. i’m losing it in the fucking subway i cannot wait to get back home.
?? for a strange/vague text
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  the polls close in at 10, go go go go !!! you can make it to the first interview if you drop everything right now. ed should be there.
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  i’m omw, just trying to GET A FUCKING RIDe. if central lon traffic isn’t your priority for the first quarter i’m quitting.
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  also, if this works out.... and i’m saying IF. if. we should probably get new phones for these messages??? i’m not freaking out. just... I just want to hold you right now. to be there for whatever they announce.
► for a text not meant for you
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  jonathan i have no idea what they teach you in med school but. That thing you suggested? Christ i saw stars. i’m p sure august can’t walk straight 👌
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  wait
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  SMHhhhhh no way 🙃🙃🙃. they show shit like this on twitter and i always said it’s utterly fake tosh. well GUESS WHAT? I’M BEING PUNISHED FOR MY SKEPTICISM. FOR MY HUBRIS.
[[  willem 🍑💕 ]]  i am so sorry lol.
↕ for a scared/worried text
[[  sutherlandslide. ]]  [ 2019 ]  this is a temp phone so i’m not sure if it’ll get through. thank God the contacts saved. S. Jobs looking out for me from beyond the grave i guess haha.
[[  sutherlandslide. ]] [ 2019 ] okay, okay. here’s to cutting the crap in the new year: your mom texted. actually, she didn’t, she phoned MY mom, who was already riled up for not being able to reach me, so I assume that just amped her up. cue their collective paranoia that we’re somehow both gonna die at 5000 miles from one another but in perfect sync. cue my mom phoning the EMBASSY. she cried for like an hour but i managed to get from her that you’re?? in a bad way?? on some stuff?? it still wasn’t clear. you’re using?
[[  sutherlandslide. ]] [ 2019 ] one, what, and two, what the fuck? you never did that shit. we never did that shit. i took like two bumps in fresher’s week and you had to hold my hair back as i was throwing up in someone’s garden. and then you stayed up with me literally all through the night while i kept saying i can hear my teeth speak, which, Yeah. so how
[[  sutherlandslide. ]] [ 2019 ] God this PHONE. how did you get from that to just doing lines on the reg? and what else? there better not be an else. there better not is all i’m saying. and no i don’t mean the swedish/danish/whatever boyfriend, you can go through the GQ catalogue for all i care & as long as you’re safe. i mean an ILLEGAL sort of else. God, August, what happened to you? you had plans. we had plans? just because David Cameron can be caught on camera dicking a pig or something doesn’t mean it’s a free for all in world politics. one footage of the wrong angle, the right angle, and it just. it all goes to shit.
[[  sutherlandslide. ]] [ 2019 ] I don’t even know if I’m giving you this ole slap on the wrist as your future PR or manager or... or just as me. I think it’s just as me. I cannot cope with the thought of you snorting shit off someone’s hand in a glitzy loo somewhere. I cannot cope with the fact that? This is who you are when I’m not there? Was this who you’ve always been? Where the fuck was I during it? What did I not see? It sends me bloody raving. It sends me just... somewhere so dark and so off the edge of the world.
[[  sutherlandslide. ]] [ 2019 ] I’m coming home.
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simkjrs · 7 years
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Hi please PLEASE talk to me abt the socioeconomic state of japan in bnh verse I am SO interested to hear ur thoughts? I'm a poli theory major and let me tell u im a SLUT for fic that deal w the political/social repercussions of fictional happenings
sure thing! 
disclaimer: i only just graduated high school so i’m pulling all of this out of my ass one semester of macroeconomics i took in senior year. feel free to add onto or correct any of this 
edit: if anyone wants to use this for reference when writing boku no hero japan, feel free! i’d appreciate any credit, but it’s not necessary. 
--
what really got me thinking about the socioeconomic state of boku no hero japan was probably the difference between orudera junior high (bakugou and izuku’s school) vs. yuuei, both of which are in the same city, musutafu. orudera junior high gives off the feeling of a school that’s a bit run down; not terrible enough that it obstructs the kids’ education, but enough that you think the school probably can’t afford to keep it in good repair. 
here’s a screenshot of bakugou and izuku’s classroom:
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and then here’s izuku’s desk, which has details indicating that it’s in slight disrepair: 
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if you go back through the chapters and look at the setting at yuuei, it’s spic-n-span. just super clean and well-kept. it’s an entire world of difference… so already there is this huge disparity between the junior high school in izuku’s neighborhood, and yuuei, which is a 40 minute subway ride away (chapter 3).
makes sense that yuuei would be so nice and expensive if it’s the most prestigious hero academy in the country, right? but there’s more details too, like this brief exchange between bakugou & iida right at the very beginning: 
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bakugou’s resentful comment about iida being an “elite” really only makes sense to me in the context of economic disparity. let’s infer that soumei junior high is better funded, better equipped, better everything in general. of course bakugou will resent iida for that, especially coming from the more ill-maintained orudera junior high. the difference in their economic status is already apparent. 
this isn’t even going into the difference between yaoyorozu’s incredibly rich status vs the rest of the class vs uraraka, who has decided to become a hero because she wants the financial security, and who also lives in an apartment by herself and skips meals to save on money. so even within the class itself there’s a huuuge difference in economic status. 
you could just think of it as the individual circumstances of the characters, but i think it’s more of a systematic problem – see, again, the difference in infrastructure quality between the different schools (the public school is not doing so great but yuuei is doing fantastic). maybe the city is poor, or maybe all of its funds go towards repairing the constant property damage from villain attacks, or maybe there’s just some areas they don’t care to maintain. either way: just by traversing different parts of the city you’ll probably see big differences in how well the neighborhoods are kept. 
and now, for a different question: if this is the golden age of peace, why are there still so many villain fights? 
looking at chapter one (the first villain we see is a guy who stole a purse and then tried to fight back when he was caught) and chapter 115 (villain activity increases sharply after all might’s retirement), i feel like… these attacks are driven by financial need. look at this: 
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a group of adults gathered to commit crime… just to steal a register from a convenience store. that’s such a small sum of money! but they were so elated to get just that amount. it seems like the kind of thing that would happen if you were strapped for money, right? 
and then the villain from chapter 1: why would he fight so hard just because he got caught stealing a purse? he stopped the trains, for pete’s sake. all i can think is that a) he needed the money he’d be able to get by selling the purse, or b) he knew he wouldn’t be able to afford the fines, and that’s why he fought. 
maybe i’m reading too much into this, but based off these crimes, plus the other details provided above, i really feel like there’s a growing problem in boku no hero japan where there’s an increasing disparity in wealth. 
another thing to consider: in the golden age of peace, you’d have to be pretty stupid, pretty reckless, or pretty desperate to commit a crime where heroes frequent. (or you’re a black market dealer and/or evil.) if you’ve got an increasing number of people who are poor, who are dropping from the middle class to under the poverty line, or who have no upwards economic mobility, then you’ve got plenty of people desperate enough to try some petty crime for the sake of just a bit more cash for rent this month. that would be enough to explain the frequent villain fights that heroes get into – which are common enough that people will stop by and watch the show on their way to work. (chapter 1) 
this is really just a theory… but what could you use to explain why there’s a growing number of people struggling to make ends meet? 
here’s some factoids about japan (this article is from 2016): 
its real wages were falling, and as such, had weak domestic consumption; people buying less & saving more, or people just not having the money to spend in the first place, resulting in less money circulating in the economy and causing the economy to slow down. efforts to stimulate wage growth in 2015 did not make it down to the workers 
there was an increasing number of people with non-regular jobs, part time jobs, etc. as opposed to full time jobs, so they couldn’t get the financial security of a full time job (source)
one in six people in 2014 were living in relative poverty. this rate is higher among single mothers and among middle aged men without families, i believe. 
japan was like, 39th of 41 developed countries in terms of child poverty (the higher the number, the worse it is). something like that
this is despite japan having a high labor participation rate and a low unemployment rate, and also a low violent crime rate 
basing boku no hero japan off of actual real world japan’s current economic problems: we could surmise that, in boku no hero japan, although nominal wages are rising, real wages are falling; infrastructure spending is poor and disorganized, geared towards repairing villain-inflicted property damage and not enough towards everything else; and people are finding difficulty holding onto jobs (as seen with uraraka’s parents) and are forced into low-paying, part-time work, and may find themselves struggling with debt. 
oh, and here’s a quote from the guardian (jan 2017): “experts say programmes to help needy children are underfunded and held back by bureaucratic inefficiency and political apathy.” 
so it’d actually be quite viable for boku no hero japan to be doing quite badly, economically, and to be struggling with wealth inequality and other super fun things like that. 
boku no hero japan is also like centuries in the future, one where villainy is commonplace, so it’s not a surprise that people’s response to struggling to make ends meet would be “well, i have a pretty good quirk. if i’m lucky, i think i’ll be able to steal some cash, and i’m desperate enough to do it, too.” SO, my personal guess, is that this is a biiiig portion of the crimes that heroes fight. 
i mean, it doesn’t really make sense for villains to do so much… villain-ing… when there’s footage almost every single week of the heroes taking down yet ANOTHER criminal. why do they keep coming out of the woodwork? why’s there still enough criminals to keep all the heroes in business? ‘cause they’re desperate and need the money, probably. which is understandable. so even if you eliminate a villain, you haven’t addressed the economic problems that drove them to become a villain in the first place; hence, there’s always someone else rising up to take their place. 
on that note, let’s take a closer look at the hero industry! 
in chapter 1, horikoshi gives us a brief history of heroics. quirks emerged, the government wasn’t sure what to do to combat quirk-related crime, heroes emerged, and heroes eventually became sanctioned by the law. and when that happened: 
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so that’s pretty cool! seems like heroes aren’t specifically a government institution, but they are affiliated with & rewarded by it. makes sense, since heroes have to work closely with law enforcement on some matters, anyways. heroes =/= police only because heroes are specifically there to combat quirk-related crime. 
but times have changed since then, as shown in the latest manga chapter: 
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“it’s all about entertainment and approval ratings and whatnot.” 
we know from the stain arc that heroes are still paid by the government: 
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‘given my status’ – in other words: his hero ranking? popularity? how respected he is as a hero? hmmm. 
uraraka’s mentor that arc explains that heroes are sort of “paid on commission” by the number of crimes they can resolve, but said commissions usually get sent their way by the police: 
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but to get your name out there (both to the police and to the public), and to become higher ranking in the popularity polls, you need to cultivate a public image, too. get yourself some attention. 
so to cultivate a public image, one thing that heroes can do is to conduct a fight in a public, open space where anyone can see. apparently this happens often enough that izuku would actually regularly run into one of these fights on his way to/from school, and would stay to take notes and learn from them. villain attacks are ALSO frequent enough that apparently all might keeps arriving at yuuei late because he stops to help out: 
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in other words, villain attacks and fights are a regular, almost quotidian experience. more on that in a sec. for now, just think about how the heroes benefit from public fights: they get to show off, and their fights are broadcasted, and they can get a boost in their rankings. fighting against a villain, they don’t just have a motive to do their job and save people; they have a motive to grab the spotlight and show off. popularity boost! we actually see this happen in chapter one, when mount lady leaps into kamui woods’ fight and defeats a villain in one kick. 
so, as a citizen, you may be grateful to the heroes for saving people – but you might resent them for turning these situations into a spectacle for showing off. incidents sometimes turn into competitions between heroes. if you take that a step further, you might think some of the heroes are only helping because they want to look good. and hey, that’s not the kind of person you’d want to entrust your life to, right? 
because heroics is now partially driven by entertainment and image, heroes are all forming their separate hero agencies to try and differentiate themselves. for example, this list: 
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while they work together to fight crime, they have to battle for popularity and attention… they probably even have to vie for commissions/crime cases from the police. they all need to make themselves stronger, cooler, & a better choice than the other hero agencies. it’s something of a conflict of interest. you can imagine sometimes that gets in the way of cooperation (i.e. endeavor’s forever grudge against all might. y’all should read the illegals spin off.) 
and if you’re battling for popularity and attention… it would also make sense for you to center your hero office somewhere with lots of crime, and lots of people to see you fighting crime. right? urban centers would provide plenty of both. what about slums, and the underground, and the outskirts, then? these are places that news reporters and cameras can’t reach easily – and possibly might not want to travel to at all. these are also places where passersby and onlookers might run away instead of praising you. you won’t get a lot of return (in terms of publicity) by working here. so if you’re business-minded… you’re not going to conduct your hero investigations here. 
i mean, yuuei even has a business department. heroics is a business. you make money off of this, and you have to sell your image to the police and the public. if you focus more attention on places that are profitable to you, then the other areas lose. there’s no way around that. 
so poor neighborhoods, bad neighborhoods, camera- and television broadcasting-inaccessible places get the short end of the stick. the heroes don’t go here as often, because it’s not profitable. (well, the heroes probably come down here if they get a police commission. but where are they if a spontaneous crime happens, hm?) meanwhile you turn on the t.v. and you see like five heroes show up at one battle downtown, which is complete overkill. you’d feel pretty resentful, right? do the heroes think your area of residence isn’t worth protecting, just because it doesn’t get them as much attention? do the heroes think it’s okay to just ignore your area of residence? fuck that, right? heroes are supposed to serve the public, and you’re still part of the public too, right? 
that’s gonna build up more resentment between bad neighborhoods & areas v.s. the areas that heroes frequent (often urban, downtown, lots of people to witness their good deeds). and it definitely builds up resentment towards heroes who aren’t so discreet about the money-making aspects of their businesses. 
like: all might sells merchandise. okay, understandable. present mic has a radio show (which probably gets paid to run advertisements). okay, that’s pretty cool! but then you get things like this: 
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a hero using their public service, publicly paid hours… to shoot a commercial and make themselves a little bit of cash on the side. if you’re in one of those areas that heroes don’t frequent so often – wouldn’t you be pretty furious to find out that the person who’s supposed to be fighting crime in your neighborhood just made $500,000 by filming a commercial instead? 
you’re going to turn on the television and see ads with pro heroes in them – pro heroes who used their public service hours to do something for their own profit. this isn’t to say that heroes can’t film commercials, or make money on the side. if they’re helping people, it’s great that they can make a living! but they’re making that living by pandering to the entertainment industry when they’re supposed to be… you know… helping people. even kendou (in the picture above) comments that it’s not very hero like. the next page, momo replies that this aspect of the hero business is ‘unavoidable.’ ads, entertainment – it’s all part of the hero industry now. 
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and they don’t feel that good about it. 
if all this conjecture is true, then – as grateful as people are to the heroes – they might be quite critical of the hero industry itself, and the heroes that embody the worst parts of it. i’m not surprised that there are a whole bunch of people who feel “othered” by heroes, and by society as a whole. 
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like… that’s no excuse to be a villain. stop that. but it would certainly be a reason for people to dislike the hero industry. AND it would explain why it is that stain’s ideology resonated so deeply with other people. 
AAAAND that’s basically the rundown of what i think the socioeconomic state of boku no hero japan is like. sorry this was horribly long
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