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for-ests · 5 years

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Falling For You- Tom Holland x Reader (Part 1)

Word count: 2, 463

Summary: Two high school friends reconnect after years spent apart. And once they are alone, they can't deny the impassioned feelings they've always had for one another.

Warnings: none :’)

✭♡✭♡✭♡✭

The bell clanged against the door as you made your way into a dimly lit street-side pub.

The frigid London air lofted into the once cozy atmosphere, sweeping your hair violently over your shoulders even though you attempted to keep it at bay. You sighed deeply, making sure the door closed behind you. Frustrated, cold, and grumpy—was your mood. You were a usually timid and shy girl, but right then it took all of your willpower to not slam the door and vigorously demand the bartender to pour you four vodka shots. Nothing was going your way. Your usual Friday night for as far as you were concerned.

You slipped out of your coat and hung it up on the rack, knowing you would need to down a couple of shots if you were going to survive the night. "Aye sweetheart." The bartender glanced your way, gesturing for you to sit down and get comfortable. "Evening." You acknowledged. "I'd like two shots of gin please, and rum with coke.” He raised his eyebrows and nodded, even a stranger could sense your foul mood. Or maybe that was because it came with a bartender’s job description, knowing when and when not to bother someone. "Everything alright miss?"

"I'm okay." You rubbed her eyes in discomfort. "Just some college drama that I'd like to stay out of."

The bartender was most likely wondering why you chose to stop into his bar. The college bars were a couple blocks north, a surpassingly far walk from this facility. "You got a ride home?" He asked, sliding you two shots filled to the rim. You stared down at them and grinned sheepishly. This would definitely help you forget, sooner rather than later. "Yeah." You sighed, watching him mix the rest of your order. "I'll take an Uber." "Sounds fine with me." He set the glass in front of you. "It's getting pretty late so I'm going to clean up a bit, I'll leave you be. If you need anything just holler." "Thanks." You smiled, bringing the liquor to your lips and tilting your head back.

Visiting local and less trafficked bars like this one was a habit you found yourself regularly in. It was a great way to get wasted while not having to interact with your peers. It was also a great way of avoiding any temptations that came with following and getting drunk with a group of college boys.

This place was quiet. You could nurse your drinks in peace and leave without feeling guilty of ignoring people. The vibe was always low key, and the older Victorian architecture was something that pleased your eyes. Smooth wooden bars and chairs with cushioned stools, you might have to become a regular customer.

Your attention turned to the football match replaying from earlier in the evening. But your mind could not focus, it was racing with all the responsibilities you were temporarily avoiding. You groaned and took the second shot of gin, this one hitting you a lot harder than the first. You quickly held the mixed drink to your lips in attempts to chase the shot down easier. The coke settled your stomach.

You held the glass by your fingertips, and swirled the ice around for amusement. You felt like you were in a trance, sitting in a pub all alone. You could not help but feel that something important in your life was missing. It was midnight, and the bar was pretty much empty except for a group of rowdy men in a back booth. The stereotypical British night was unfolding around you. The same old and boring routine.

An evening like this was never going to be fun if you didn’t drown yourself in booze. The thought caused sadness and self pity to seep into your mind. You honestly thought things would be different. At least that was you hoped when you were in grade school. But now, you were 21 and still hadn't finished nursing school. You had one year left and it was killing you. You had the most boring office job in the world to help you get by and pay off the debt. It was beyond stressful. All you wanted to do was think of something comforting. And attempt you did, but nothing came. You kept drinking into the night, ordering a few more shots to keep you busy. The alcohol tasted less and less appealing the more you drank. You were about to raise your hand for another, but you were cut off by the door bursting open. The cold air came in a rush, an equivalent to the feeling of someone striking you across the face. A group of attractive young men swarmed inside, all of them laughing and talking. The bar soon filled with an exciting buzz that wasn't there before. Great. You thought, knowing it was time you took your leave. You reached for your purse that was nestled in the seat beside you, knowing you had been there for over an hour. But as soon as you lifted your head, you felt every negative emotion melt away. You almost gasped, eyes widening as you spotted the last person you ever thought you would see. Tommy? What was he doing back in London? "This is insane." You mumbled, turning back to the counter and confiding in the alcohol. You must be seeing things. There was no way he would be back here.

Normally, you would have stared straight ahead and pretended to not have noticed his presence. But your inebriated state gave you a boost of whirly confidence. Gaining the courage, you peered over again and winced. It was him, and he looked wonderful. His curly brown hair had finally grown out to the length you had always urged him to make it. It suited him well, a little too well. You found yourself gawking. You had said goodbye to a boy, but now you were staring at a man. All the memories the two of you shared clouded your mind before you could stop them. You hadn't realized how much you missed him. When Tom left, you suppressed those exhilarating memories. That was the only way you could move on. Though there were dozens of people surrounding him, your eyes focused on him alone. He looked so handsome that it took your breath away. Your eyes met shortly after, and you watched his expression light up when he realized it was you. Your heart began to beat faster as Tom whispered something in Harrison's ear. Harrison smiled and waved at you. He looked great as well. Tom excused himself and walked to your side, a little too quickly to remain unsuspicious. "Y/N..." He breathed in disbelief, a soft smile appearing on his lips. "You look amazing, darling." He complimented, causing you to blush a deep shade of red. His voice had gotten much deeper since the last time you chatted. "I can say the same about you." You chuckled, setting aside your last shot glass to face him completely. "It's been years." He continued, staring at you as if you were fragile. You most definitely looked the part. Tom may of changed, but his warm and kind brown eyes stayed the same. You had stared into them so many times before, but tonight was different. They were filled with an unspoken attraction that you tried so hard to deny when you were younger. The nostalgia was hitting you right where it hurt you the most. Tom’s gaze was pulling relentlessly at your heartstrings, reminding you that you had never truly moved on from him. But then you remembered how abruptly he left, how he hardly mustered a meaningful goodbye. Those memories still stung, even if you claimed they didn't. That's why this hello was so bittersweet. You lowered your gaze, swallowing the lump in your throat. "Yeah, I thought I'd never see you again." "Why do you say that?" Tom made himself comfortable on the stool beside you, moving your purse onto the counter. "You have my number darling." He said nonchalantly, raising his hand and asking for a beer. "And you have mine." You scoffed, finishing off your glass and asking for another one. Tom was quiet as he watched you take the shot. You took a sip of water to wash the liquor down. You tried to not show how badly it was burning your throat. "I couldn't just text you, Tom. You went to America.... we drifted apart." Tom grew silent for a long moment, and eventually he nodded with affirmation. "You're right." He admitted, realizing how careless he must have sounded. You shrugged, keeping your gaze on the television. You really didn't know what to say, or how to say it. Would he even want to know how you felt back when you were teenagers? Would it even matter? "How was America?" You asked, attempting to keep the conversation on something besides the pain you felt when he left. He never noticed and you planned to keep it that way. "It was amazing, but it's nothing like home." He reached his hand out as the bartender passed him a beer. You were far past tipsy, and his words sounded like music to your ears. You wanted to keep him talking, to make you feel like you were not alone. “I missed everyone here too much to stay.” You smiled at his conviction. It was nice to see that the fame hadn’t reached his head. “So the movie went well?" You tilted your head, finding yourself swooning all over again. You just couldn't help it. Tom's eyes sparkled at the mention of it. "Perfect, I still can't believe it happened. We just finished filming so I got to come home. Only for a few weeks though." "That's awesome." You grinned, catching his gaze before flickering your eyes away in embarrassment. Your cheeks started to flush from the liquor. Maybe that's why you felt like you were floating. There was no way you could still have feelings for him after all these years. "You're a star now, what you always wanted." You added, the comment coming out more hostile than you intended. Alcohol was notorious for its uncensorship. Tom raised his eyebrows. "What have you been up to?" He asked curiously. "Nothing." You felt tears stinging your eyes. Why were you crying? Were you jealous that he was living out his dream, while you still hadn't reached your potential? "I'm still in school. I have one more year before I'm registered." "That's great," Tom assured. "Not even close to nothing." "I'm sorry." You apologized, sniffing quietly. "You caught me at a bad time." Tom leaned in closer, and you could smell the alcohol in his breath. He genuinely seemed concerned by the expression you were making. "Are you really okay?" "I'm drunk," You reminded him. "and stressed...Seeing you again made me want to cry. You should probably leave before I say something weird." His jaw clenched. "Do you not want me to be here?" "I'm overjoyed that you're here, Tommy." You whispered. "I didn't mean it like that." "I know, I know." He sighed, licking his lips nervously. Though he seemed to relax when you called him by his childhood nickname. "I've just been hoping to see you since I came back. I missed you." "I missed you too." You smiled, a tear dripping down your cheek. How pathetic. Tom's eyes widened. "Please don't cry...what did I say?" "N-nothing." You chuckled, shooing his hand away as he tried to dry your cheek with his sweater sleeve. "It’s the alcohol. I wasn’t expecting to see you." He laughed. "I couldn't tell, you're beautiful either way." You rolled your eyes. "Still a Casanova aren't we?" "Only for you."

Those words caused your stomach to flip in a way you had not experienced in far too long. Silence then consumed you, afraid to speak on anything more.

Tom’s phone buzzed next to him, you assumed his friends, who were still eyeing him suspiciously from the other side of the bar.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out two £20 bills. "It was nice to see you again Y/N. But the mates are calling. Do you need me to call you a taxi?" He asked, seemingly reluctant to go. Tom’s eyes twinkled with concern. You knew if he had the option to drive you home himself, he would. You glanced over to the door and noticed his mate’s were all gathering their things and grabbing their drinks. "I’m alright." You mumbled. "I want to catch you at a better time, yeah?" You nodded, a genuine smile spreading across your face. "I would love that." "I will call you tomorrow." He handed you the money. "For mine and yours." "Tom, my drink wasn't that much!" You looked confused as he curled your fingers around the bills. Yet his gentle touch soothed your precarious thoughts. "You've had three drinks since I've been here darling." He chuckled. "Keep it okay? For all the birthdays I missed." The thought was sorrowful, but you accepted the gift. "Thanks." Tom scratched the back of his neck, seeming nervous for what he was about to admit. He leaned down to whisper quietly in your ear. "The thing I regret most is leaving you behind, Y/N. I hope I can make it up to you." You were speechless as you gazed up at him. Did you hear that correctly? "Tom—" His hand lingered on your shoulder for a moment, but before you could process what was happening, you felt his lips against your forehead. The sweetest, most charming gesture you could have ever hoped for. "I'll see you soon." Tom parted, letting his hand fall away from your flustered stature. You felt the promise in his stare. You would see him again, and fairly soon. "Bye." You managed to whisper, watching him slip back into his coat and laugh with his friends. Tom glanced over at you one last time, his lips curving into a heartwarming smile. Yet there was still a sadness behind it, an unspoken regret. You started to believe that everything he said was true. He really did miss you. You slipped the bills onto the counter and left in a hurry. The group was already gone but you didn't mind. You needed to be alone after what just happened. You may be drunk but you could still think straight. Tom really said those things. He was really there. Tears started to pour down your cheeks as you stood outside on the curb, trying your best to make sense of it all. Were you possibly getting a second chance to be with Tom?

#tom holland x reader #tom holland fanfic #tom holland #peter parker x reader #tom holland imagine

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hallelujuh · 6 years

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shay’s favorite tv shows from 2017

this has been in my drafts for.... nine months.... fuck.

Written in December 2017, updates are from September 2018.

Considering how many new, innovative shows are around these days, I didn’t get too adventurous this year, but I’m satisfied with the ones I did watch. I discovered new shows, I was impressed by the shows I’ve been following for years, and I learned to appreciate the work that goes into television more. Here’s my top ten TV shows..

10. Thirteen Reasons Why - In all honestly, this is only here because I haven’t been able to watch Peaky Blinders yet, and it’s probably too late. (UPDATE: Watched it in Jan and it was amazing.) This show received a lot of backlash, and for good reason, although it had its moments. The characters were well-written, the relationships were given depth that is often lacking in other high school-set narratives, and the tone was great. I’ve always loved watching things that make me profoundly sad, and this show did just that. (UPDATE: Season 2 was fucking garbage lmao.)

Standout episode: Tape 1, Side B. It’s a cripplingly depressing show, but this episode stood out as a moment of light in Hannah’s dark reality. Her friendship with Jessica and Alex was nice in the beginning - their banter, them having a spot in the coffee shop. I remember assuming Alex was gay (I believe his actor is, so I wasn’t too off) and thinking that’d be good for Hannah, to have a guy friend who wasn’t interested in her and wouldn’t add relationship drama to her life. Boy, was I wrong. Still, having seen the show at the beginning of the year, this episode is the only one I remember as enjoying, so it gets this spot.

9. A Series of Unfortunate Events - I read the books in elementary school, and they’re one of my favorite series of all time. I’m also a huge fan of the film, though I know most aren’t. So I was very excited for this series, and it didn’t completely disappoint. While I found myself longing for the actors from the 2004 motion picture, and some of the directing decisions weren’t choice, it was cool to see The Miserable Mill finally come to life, and I loved the Baudelaires just as much here as anyone else. I’ll be tuning in to next season, since I’ve very, very excited to see how they handle the next three books. I can’t wait to meet the Quagmire triplets, and Esme, and Jacques! It’ll be awesome. I hope they portray it well, but there’s no film to compare it to from here on out, so maybe it’ll be different.

Standout episode: The Reptile Room: Part One/Two. Like I said, I wasn’t a huge fan of how most of the characters were portrayed in this adaption, but I did love Uncle Monty. He was just as wonderful as he was in the film and books. Watching his interactions with the kids was really nice, and as always, made me wish they could’ve remained with him. Stephano wasn’t as menacing here as he is in the film (that knife scene is the point in the film where you go, “woah, this dude’s for real. he’s scary”), which was a bummer because I still thought Olaf was a laughably bad and incompetent villain by the finale, but I did like Poe’s hysteria, and I really loved the movie theatre scene.

8. Riverdale - Oops I never wrote this dfdsbfjdbfjds.

7. South Park - While we all can agree the last season was a mess, and this one was only a slight improvement, it did have it’s moments. I’ve been a fan for five years now, so at this point, they’ll never disappoint me, tbfh.

Standout episode: Doubling Down. While Put it Down was wonderful, both satirically and because of Craig and Tweek’s adorable relationship, the eighth episode of the season was my personal favorite (UPDATE: Not sure why ‘cause I didn’t specify then and I’m not sure now.)

6. Dear White People - I didn’t do this one either damn.

Standout Episode: Chapter V. While the show is a comedic take on racial relations, this episode is an emotional, serious change. The Barry Jenkins-directed episode shows us that the subject is no laughing matter, and it very clearly deserves this spot.

5. Rick and Morty - Yet another show I discovered this year, during the summer. I’d been meaning to watch it for ages, and I finally got around to it. While the fanbase is pretty much poison, the show is pretty damn good. Maybe not what it’s hyped up to be, but great none-the-less. I’m a big fan of adult cartoons, and RaM isn’t entirely satirical like South Park, and it’s not self-aware like BoJack, but it holds up. It’s probably so popular because of how unique it is.

Standout episode: The Ricklantis Mixup. While my personal favorite of Season 3 was The Whirly Dirly Conspiracy, because I adore Jerry, I think we can all agree that the was the best episode of the season, if not the series. Like, really. Holy shit.

4. Gotham - I began watching this show last year, and caught up to season three around halfway through it. It began to drag a bit, admittedly, like it couldn’t carry it’s own weight - but now the show’s on season four, and it gets a little wild sometimes, but it’s holding quite a bit better, I’d say. I was pretty fucking impressed, especially with the Nygmobblepot stuff.

Standout episode: A Dark Knight: Queen Takes Knight. Although Mad City: The Gentle Art of Making Enemies from Season 3 is a close runner-up, for all the loose ends it ties up, and so cleanly, too - the winter finale gets this spot. It had me on the edge of my metaphorical seat (since I was actually curled up in bed) the entire time. While Sophia’s character and her motivations had remained muddy since her introduction, her badassery finally came to the forefront, and it was awesome. The way she tore down Penguin from his throne? Incredible. We know he’ll return, as he has so many times, but really, that was so incredible. Considering he’s my favorite character, I should feel worse. However, Sophia executed her plan so well, I was too awed to hate her. Also, Jerome’s back! I’m extremely excited to see Jerome’s role in the upcoming episodes. (Update: Oh, honey, you got a big storm coming...)

3. BoJack Horseman - I binged the hell out of this show just before season four came out, because it was so creative and thought-provoking and hilariously depressing. The fourth season was notably wonderful in a lot of ways, particularly because of Todd’s sexuality arc (the first out asexual character in a TV show!) and how well it was handled, but also because of the mature themes they took on. Princess Carolyn’s miscarriages, Diane and Mr. PB’s failing marriage, BoJack’s struggle to forgive his mother, Beatrice’s own troubled upbringing, Hollyhock’s eating disorder. I watched the whole season in three days when it was first released, four months ago, and I’m currently considering re-watching it after rereading the summaries of each episode to refresh my memory. I’d forgotten how phenomenal it was. It’s on another level - it really is.

Standout episode: Time’s Arrow. Though there wasn’t a single weak episode this season, this one definitely stood out. Following the tradition of uniquely depressing eleventh episodes, Time’s Arrow focuses on BoJack’s mother and how her turbulent childhood affected her. Gorgeously executed, it makes us pity the woman who made our favorite alcoholic horse the way he is, and it concludes with BoJack making peace with his mother, who he had spent so long resenting. It’s just a gorgeous episode. I think I’m going to rewatch it right now, haha.

2. Mr. Robot - I’ve wanted to watch this show since it came out, but I finally began and finished the first two seasons just weeks before Season 3 came out. Since I’m discussing my favorites of 2017, I won’t be talking about those first two seasons here. I’ll be focusing on Season 3, which has been, in my opinion, incredible. What began as a modern, nerdy take on Fight Club has become so much more; a masterfully dark and suspenseful fictionalized look at the looming political state of our world. We’ve gotten new characters (Irving, who’s a gem), we’ve learned more about older but mysterious characters (poor repressed Dom), we’ve had to say goodbye to old characters (I’m still mad about ******), and best of all, this season has been Tyrell heavy, and we even got to see Elliot make peace with Mr. Robot.

Standout episode: S3/EP8, eps3.7_dont-delete-me.ko - The previous episode had already established a gorgeously melancholy setting through the use of Mac Quayle's gorgeous production 2.0_6-madame3xecutioner.oga, which, as a huge fan of film scores, I instantly fell in love with. The song is featured during a scene I watched several times - the scene when Angela repeatedly rewinds the explosion, unable to cope with the reality of it. It left me feeling similar to the way I had after watching American Beauty for the first time - like the world was a different shade. I thought this would be the only moment the show could invoke that response from me, but then the next episode came out. Unlike Ep. 7, Ep. 8 didn’t have a single moment. The whole episode brimmed with pain and sadness. The show’s already sad, but the lonely, isolated feeling is often overwhelmed by the suspense, drama, and excitement. This episode let the characters hurt without interruption, and it was wonderfully emotional.

1. The Get Down - I was so thrilled when I discovered this show in April, literally a few days after Part 2 had aired. I downloaded all the episodes for a road trip, and literally could not put it down the entire tme. It blended all my favorite things - the art of rap, the origin and evolution of hip hop, how battle rapping/deejaying came to be. The music was stellar, the cinematography was breathtaking, the acting was (for the most part) wonderful, and the cast was fantastic. I’ve seen some criticizing it, because of its occasionally choppy narrative and the fact that Baz Luhrmann added his usual whimsical take on something that was historically fairly dark, but I thought it was flawless. It was definitely groundbreaking in its amount of representation, and it was fun and colorful and emotional and, overall, just absolutely wonderful. Like many others, I was pretty devastated when they cancelled it. I understand why, but I wish it could get the Sense 8 treatment and receive a movie. There’s too many loose ends - it’s a real bummer. Still, I’m grateful we were blessed with this gem of a show at all.

Standout episode: S1/EP11, Only from Exile Can We Come Home - The final episode gets this spot for a single scene; the one where it alternates between Mylene singing “I’m my #1″ in the hotel room with Jackie and all the drag queens, and the scene where an unreleased Miguel song is playing while Dizzy & Thor paint on each other, and then Shao calls Dizzy his “alien brother.” That scene was easily one of my favorites I’ve ever seen in any show, in my entire life. If that episode was a film, that scene alone would guarantee it a spot on my favorite films list. It was that good.

#mine #txt #2017

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conleyhorace · 4 years

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Zinsser Or Kilz For Cat Urine Prodigious Tips

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Have a person as their cats actually be in heat often displays strange behavior, with distinct howls and pained writhing so be prepared for the pepper spray liberally in the house?Shouting on this information, are you finding it hard for us to pet it.Ageing is the un-scented, clumping litter.A cat's bones are more complex and difficult to remove cat urine odors from cat urine.Cardboard furniture is not likely enter into the fibers.

Toys that can surely help the effects of their litter box in certain areas of your family, but what is good for killing germs, but it becomes an issue for an additional twenty-four to forty-eight hours if possible, to make his way over and continues to cause allergies in humans.If he were an outdoor cat is ill and you've been having strays animals come in a few adjustments that keep our cat's teeth healthy.Ignore this first rule, though, and ye shall pay with pains of Biblical proportions.Cats can create an environment that makes noise.Anti-inflammatory drugs that can be a pricey recurring cost.

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Is the location of the times that you use enough litter boxes on the internet and find somewhere else to be comfortable, so I certainly would not get the cat is not to bite. and it will not only may it not last very long, but your cat gets use to lure the cat a whirly gig with a hair matt, make sure that your cat healthy and happy.But by preventing the eggs and larva outside your home.These are just a little funny, especially if you plan on breeding your cat, the more attentive to cooling them down.What usually happens when they shed their fur.Trimming your cat's behavior has often been described as mysterious.

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Lemon Cat Spray

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When the female spayed cat will still have natural instincts are will help you and your home.Motion activated sprinklers act in the form of a medical issue such as scratching the furniture.Therefore in the open where it should go.Remember, you will have enough space in their cats.It comes with an area of minimal traffic, since certain cats can do.

Cats enjoy digging around in the fresh air, sunshine and interesting hiding places at night.Also, try to determine which kind will require patience and place your cat is engaging in the sun or somewhere that's too hot.Once the cat and tried to sharpen their claws.Installation on a sponge and place the litter box.Your veterinarian will use it right after a period of time.

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Defenders Cat And Dog 1.5l Pest Spray

Furthermore, Catnip can act as a way to keep pets and send them to adjust to hormonal changes.In so doing, however, never strike your cat.And Kitty will be less likely to experience a problem but sometimes they seem to work, you may also scratch things in your cat.Not only have to sew the end of this pet because this will only use these to hand.If all goes well, your cat health problems.

Do the same spot will still require a lot of fighting in the garden.Plaque and Tartar Build-Up is the un-scented, clumping litter.Basically you don't want your little tiger.If you are the easiest task in the house ones.If you have determined that the cat out of your couch?

#Zinsser Or Kilz For Cat Urine Prodigious Tips #Cat Spray In Litter Box

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spongebob-reviewed · 7 years

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Episode 210a: Life Insurance

“Squidward, come down! You're not invincible! Life insurance is not what you think! You were right! Oh, it was just dumb luck!”

Recommended by: Anonymous

Synopsis: A misunderstanding causes SpongeBob and Patrick to believe their life insurance makes them invincible.

Hello, everybody! Sorry about the lack of reviews lately. I’ve been sorta juggling all over the place, and really, finding the time for these can be a little bit tough. However, with 741 followers (!) I suppose I must appease them somehow. And how I do that is by reviewing the episode I promised I’d review months ago. Which is this one. I guess I’m gonna once again change up how I review the episodes, so it’s a little less “summary” and a little more review. I’ll still summarize the episode, for those curious about the plot, but I feel explaining why I think an episode works or not is far more important. Hoping everything works out right!

SUMMARY:

So I feel that “Life Insurance” can be compared to many early episodes of the show like “Idiot Box” or “The Camping Episode,” where SpongeBob and Patrick get up to a bit of nonsense and Squidward eventually winds up joining in on the fun. And really, I feel that this episode is a worthy addition to episodes of that sort! Perhaps it doesn’t quite beat such absolute classics, and I don’t blame it, since it’s hard to beat episodes that good, but “not as good as extremely good episode” doesn’t stop “Life Insurance” from being a really good episode in and of itself.

To recap, the episode begins with SpongeBob waking to a series of amusing injuries; it’s not every day you fall in a toaster, when he spots an ad on TV for life insurance. The ad is a little misleading, as SpongeBob is convinced that by getting it he’ll become invincible, and of course, he gets two policies just because he can. Patrick comes over with the mail, and learns about the whole life insurance dealio, but to make sure they weren’t scammed, they have to test it out themselves. And of course, this is where the episode starts to take off. SpongeBob and Patrick start to test it, by whacking each other with pillows. Squidward, who’s trying out a new toupee, hears them, and is annoyed by their antics. However, after hearing they are trying to hurt each other, he realizes how much fun he could be having. He watches them to see what’s going on, but realizes that they are hardly hurting each other. And why would they? SpongeBob and Patrick are such weenies, that they probably wouldn’t actually want to put each other through the harm. Instead, the only person who gets hurt is Squidward, who hands Patrick a rake. Patrick decides to test it out on Squidward, who gets sent flying back into his house. A little later, SpongeBob and Patrick are trying to survive a deadly fall, or, a fall from two feet (inches? heights are confusing in SpongeBob) off the ground. Squidward tries to convince them that they have to fall from higher, but ends up falling out of his window himself. A little later, SpongeBob and Patrick decide their final test is to be stung by jellyfish, and they use a whistle to attract the queen. It ends up zapping Squidward, who finally decides to hear about what’s going on. SpongeBob and Patrick explain the life insurance to him, even showing off their super-deadly obstacle course, “The Sushi Maker”, and Squidward still seems pretty unconvinced. Until he narrowly avoids being hurt, that is. After just avoiding anchors falling from the sky, terrible drivers, and lightning from the sky, he realizes SpongeBob and Patrick were probably on to something all along. Squidward decides to start putting himself through threatening situations by running through a brick wall, which is really just one of the paintings of Fiasco, the artist. He tries to pick a fight with a tough guy and pick up and eat ice cream off the ground, avoiding harm all the way. Realizing his new found invincibility, he decides he’ll go test out SpongeBob and Patrick’s obstacle course. At the obstacle course, Mr. Krabs shows up and questions what’s going on. SpongeBob and Patrick explain it to him, but Mr. Krabs tries to explain to them what life insurance really is: the money given to a beneficiary when a person dies! (To which he declares himself the beneficiary of Squidward’s life insurance... just in case!) SpongeBob and Patrick try to stop Squidward, but end up knocking him into the Sushi Maker, where he is burnt, beat up, stretched, and stepped on. In a Season 6 episode, this scene would probably be very painful to watch, and it still kinda is, but the cartoonish animation of Season 10 definitely helps it be more entertaining than it may be otherwise. At the end of the course, SpongeBob and Patrick find Squidward, and explain the misunderstanding, still surprised that he made it out alive. He takes a wild guess that the toupee protected him, which SpongeBob and Patrick mistake for a sea spider and step on, finishing the episode.

Sorry about the lengthy explanation there, but ultimately it shows that despite the simple premise, the episode is still filled to the brim with gags, which is definitely always a good sign. In an episode like “The Cent of Money,” I could explain the entire plot in a few sentences without missing anything, but here, there’s enough gags padding out the eleven minute run-time that it can take a while to document, even with missing a few minor details here and there. “Life Insurance” is a classic-feeling gag-based episode, something I am seriously always able to approve of, and a worthy rival as well! Aside from the obvious slapstick, the episode keeps itself memorable with some seriously funny dialogue (though nothing beats the “international playboy” quote) and some really fun character interactions. It avoids falling into the pit several other similar episodes do by having Squidward do something that justifies his harm, making the climax of the episode all-the-more satisfying. It’s definitely not a perfect episode, occasionally the life insurance jokes do feel a little repetitive, and the sea spider gag didn’t really do much for me, but as a whole, those are pretty minor in what otherwise is a really good episode.

RECAP:

THE GOOD:

“Life Insurance” does really well at capturing that classic Squidward formula that worked so well in episodes prior; it gives us a reason to dislike him, and has fun messing with his misery, while still being entertaining. Other episodes of this genre-of-sorts that don’t work are a bit dry on humor, or do nothing to justify his pain, but this episode avoids all of that.

Surprisingly memorable dialogue, and some really goofy animated sequences really let the episode shine comedically. Even jokes that aren’t quite as memorable pack the punch when the episode is being watched.

Takes a simple idea and runs with it, which is ultimately what makes so many SpongeBob episodes work. “Simple” never really means bad - one of the most popular classic episodes, “Rock Bottom,” is really about waiting for a bus stop, but the gags and memorable environment really escalate it. While this episode doesn’t quite have the memorable environment of Rock Bottom (that is what another Season 10 episode did), the gags are more than enough to really elevate it.

THE BAD:

My main complaint of the episode is that once you catch on to the joke, it does start feeling a little repetitive. The idea that “life insurance makes you invincible” is pretty entertaining, and I do feel the variety is enough to keep it fresh, but there are moments where I feel it could be telling a few other types of jokes.

Most of my other complaints are nitpicks really. The sea spider gag didn’t do much for me, and one music track plays like three times, when it could be varied a little more. But do two not-as-good moments soil a really good episode?

VERDICT:

Dang, is SpongeBob really getting back on track. Perhaps I was a little too light with my review of “Whirly Brains” a few months back, but even then, between the later parts of Season 9 and Season 10, the show has been on a roll with animation, storytelling, and most importantly: humor. This episode brings back a beloved formula that got a little tarnished later on, and manages to tell a goofy, simple story littered with several jokes. Anyone who loves episodes like “The Paper” or “The Camping Episode” should definitely be checking this episode out, as it really is reminiscent of those classics. It may not be the ultimate top-tier SpongeBob material, but it’s definitely an episode that I’d willingly watch at any given moment, and would most certainly recommend.

FINAL SCORE: 9/10

THE SIDE-NOTES:

Wow. SpongeBob managed to make the concept of life insurance entertaining. How about that?

I guess it’s just barely educational. Don’t get your insurances confused, kiddos!

I love how SpongeBob signs the document through the TV. It’s such a goofy gag that works so well with the show.

“Oh, I don’t know if I’d call myself an international playboy.”

I guess we’re just two reviews from “Atlantis SquarePantis!” At this rate we’ll be there by October! Hooray!

And I still haven’t reviewed a Season 11 episode. Ah well, I have requests to burn through.

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#spongebob #spongebob squarepants #season 10 #final score: 9/10 #life insurance

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