#I was just nose-blind to it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

glitterrosesnzz · 2 months

Text

show

i'm back home which means! it's time for me to go absolutely nuts and post a h/azbin l/ucifer fic!! this features a few hc's ive seen going around, + a few of my own...

Lucifer sniffled as he stepped out of the shower, quickly grabbing the towel he’d set out beforehand and wrapping it tight around himself as a chill down his spine made him shiver.

Damnit. He’d been hoping the shower would get rid of the slight feeling of offness he’d woken up to.

Evidently, it hadn’t, which was never a good sign. Especially for someone like him.

Dropping the towel onto the back of his couch, Lucifer started pulling on a pair of pants-

A drop of water fell off of his still wet hair, landing directly on the tip of his nose. Lucifer froze, feeling an itch settle in.

So this was how this was gonna be, huh.

Lucifer sniffled again, rubbing his nose as the itch grew stronger, tensing up as the sensation of magic swirled up his arms.

“Hh…Hh’Ntshiew!” The half stifle was enough to calm the buzzing in his nose down, at least temporarily, but Lucifer still remained stiff. He had felt his magic surge just now- but there had been no fire, no wings, no fireworks, and nothing around him seemed to have suddenly swapped colours, so what could possibly have-

A sudden loud, distinctly Charlie-sounding shriek from downstairs made Lucifer jump up, snapping the rest of his clothes and hat on instantly as he opened a portal down to the hotel lobby.

He stepped out to find that his daughter was up in the air in Vaggie’s arms, her girlfriend’s wings flapping frantically, while Angel Dust and Husk had climbed up onto the bar counter, which, Lucifer supposed that was all fair, considering-

“What the fuck is a lion doing in the hotel lobby?” Angel Dust shouted, letting out a small noise of terror as the lion immediately turned it’s attention towards him. Lucifer winced, before putting on his usual showman’s smile, stepping forwards.

“Don’t worry, I got it!” He said, making a show of twirling his cane in an overdramatic fashion before pointing it at the lion.

The lion lunged at him.

Lucifer let out a yelp, snapping his fingers instinctually, trapping the lion within a reasonably sized iron cage. There was silence for a moment, everyone glancing between him and the lion in the cage. Lucifer’s nose, unfortunately, twitched.

“Hh…hehH-”

“My, my, what is all this chaos so early in the morning?” There was a surge of radio static, and Alastor emerged from the shadows beside the cage, making the others jump and turn their attention to him as he tapped his microphone-cane against it. “Catching today’s dinner already?”

Taking the opportunity that had been presented to him, Lucifer quickly took his hat off, twirled it- and used it to hide his face as he stifled two sneezes as quietly as he could, hoping that no magic side effects would slip through.

“H’nNt! N’tch!”

There was no magic sensation, thank goodness, and though it wasn’t satisfying in the slightest, it took the immediate urgency away, so Lucifer quickly returned his hat to his head before anyone could grow even the slightest bit suspicious- relieved to see that they were all still captivated by Alastor’s sudden appearance.

“Alastor, we’re not going to eat a lion.” Charlie was set lightly back down onto the floor by Vaggie, and proceeded to walk over to the lion’s cage, keeping a healthy distance away as she observed it. “Maybe we can find some way to tame it…”

“Ah, how unfortunate. I was somewhat looking forward to a dinner with a show.” Alastor said, leaning slightly on his cane.

“A show?” Charlie asked, and then, to Lucifer’s horror, Alastor pointed at him.

“Haha, what’re you looking at me for?” Lucifer asked, trying to ignore the various looks now directed his way. “You’re not expecting me to get in that cage are you? Cause, buddy, you’ll end up in there long before I will.”

“Goodness no. I would never expect you to willingly endanger yourself.” Alastor said, the constant grin on his face somehow appearing even more smug than usual. “Though it admittedly would be fun to watch. No, the show I’m waiting on should be starting any minute now.”

On cue, almost as if to spite him, Lucifer’s nose twitched again, the tickle flaring up.

Fuck. He needed to leave this conversation now. Lucifer prided himself on his ability to sometimes stifle, but he knew full well that he was absolute shit at holding back.

“W-well, I don’t know what you’re o-hH-...on about, but, but I’m just going to go… back to mhhy… my room-” He turned, fully planning on forming another portal but-

“Not so fast.” Alastor suddenly appeared in front of him, and Lucifer’s breath caught. “The star performer can’t just leave when the show is about to start, now can they?”

“W- watch mehH… hE’TCHshiew!!” Lucifer’s wings flew out, spreading wide, and Alastor quickly stepped back, giving him a wide berth to avoid getting hit.

“Hh- hHIE’SChiiew!!” Ah, and of course there was the fire. He quickly covered his mouth with his hands as his breath hitched again, his wings tensing in preparation. Couldn’t it have just been the wings? Why was his body and magic suddenly pulling out the whole shebang? At this rate, next his magic will be pulling out the- the-

“Hh’iETshh!” …Fireworks. “Hihh- haH- h’ETSHhiiew!!” And there was the fire again. He needed to get a handle on this, before he ended up damaging something, or worse- hurting someone.

“Hh’TSHh! ‘Tch! HhIE’SCHiiew!!!”

Fuck.

“H’Ngtsh! Hehh… hH’IETChhiew!!”

Double fuck.

“HN’Tshiew! Hh- eT’SHhiew!!”

Hells Bells, why couldn’t he fucking stop-

“Hh- hihH….” The sudden sensation of cool metal resting just under the tip of his nose took him by surprise, shocking him just enough to send the tickle temporarily back into dormancy. His wings slumped slightly with relief, and Lucifer blearily opened his eyes to find that the metal was, in fact, Alastor’s microphone-cane.

The demon himself was standing a good distance away from him though, of course, the cane held out at arms length, just enough to touch. After a brief second, Alastor pulled his cane back, shifting it to rest in the crook of his arm as he clapped slowly.

“My, my, what a performance!” He laughed, ignoring the glare Lucifer directed at him, “Though it is a shame that the carpet ended up being an unfortunate bystander.”

“Wha- oh, shit!” Sure enough, there were scorch marks on the carpet, evidently from the fire. If possible, Lucifer’s wings slouched further. “...Sorry, Charlie. I’ll uh, I’ll fix it up-”

“It’s, ah, alright, dad.” Charlie sounded uncertain, and Lucifer turned to her to find that she was looking at him with concern. “Are, um. Are you alright?”

“Of course!” He was definitely sure at this point that he wasn’t, but he couldn’t let his daughter know that. “It was just a little tickle-”

“Little?” Husk’s voice sounded from behind the bar, and Lucifer finally realized that, at some point, the bartender and Angel Dust must have ran and hid behind the counter. Husk was now standing, leaning against it with an almost irritated expression, while Angel Dust was still crouched, as though he was ready to duck back down again. “It certainly didn’t seem ‘little’ to me. You’re sick.”

“WhaAat? No. No, nu-uh, no I’m not.” Lucifer crossed his arms, avoiding eye contact with the rest of the room. Charlie let out a sigh.

“Dad.”

“I’m not sick!” Lucifer insisted, despite the Look the rest of the room was giving him. “I don’t- I can’t even get sick, I’m an angel- fallen sure, but still an angel-”

“Vaggie can get sick, and she’s an angel.” Charlie argued.

“...I’m an archangel?”

“Outside of power levels, sir,” Vaggie said, moving to stand beside her girlfriend, also staring at Lucifer with concern. “Whether you’re an archangel or not doesn’t affect much in this matter.”

Lucifer stared at the two of them, then at Alastor’s still smug looking grin, and then over at Husk and Angel Dust at the bar. After a beat, he sighed.

“You guys aren’t going to believe me no matter what I say, are you.” At the various negative shaking of heads, he sighed again. “Thought so. Fine, so maybe I’m coming down with a cold or something. So what?”

“Dad, you just almost burnt the floor to ashes.” Charlie said. Lucifer winced.

“Well, I-”

“He was also responsible for our little lion problem this morning, I would assume.” Alastor suddenly added on, seemingly delighting in Lucifer’s panicked expression. Angel Dust finally stood up straight in shock at the revelation.

“That’s why- Charlie, princess.” He said, “I think we’re going to have to either quarantine your dad, or build a bunker.”

“I’m leaning towards the bunker.” Husk muttered, and Angel Dust smirked at him. Charlie pinched her brow in exasperation.

“We’re not going to build a bunker.” She said, “Though… something like a quarantine isn’t that bad of an idea… Dad, go back to your room.”

“Huh- but-” Lucifer couldn’t even get a word out.

“Go back to your room and rest, dad.” Charlie insisted, “You seem… mostly fine now outside of the… incidents, but we don’t want whatever this is to be getting any worse.”

…Lucifer supposed he could see the logic in that, even if this somewhat felt like he was being grounded by his own daughter.

“Fine.” He said, snapping his fingers and re-opening the portal to his room. “Just, call me if you need anything, okay?”

“Don’t worry, everything will be fine, you can just stay in bed all day today!” Charlie said, patting her father on his arm. “I’ll send Niffty up to your room with some tea later… Wait, where is she anyways?”

“She’s in the lion cage.” Angel Dust deadpanned.

“Niffty-”

Lucifer stepped through the portal and let it close behind him before whatever chaos was about to begin could truly start to happen. After a moment of standing in silent debate, he shrugged off his jacket, kicked off his shoes, placed his hat onto the bedside desk, and flopped down onto his bed.

He supposed having a rest day wouldn’t be so bad…

…Ah, shit-

“Hh’EITShhiew!!”

There was a loud scream from downstairs, followed by a roar, followed soon after by a surprisingly loud shout of; “We’ve got this! Don’t you dare come down here dad!!”

Oh, right. He’d made that cage out of his magic, hadn’t he.

…Maybe Alastor was going to end up getting his ‘lion lunch’ after all.

#H/azbin H/otel #snz #snz fic #snzfic #side note; l/ucifer does canonically have a nose y'all are just blind i have the screenshots to prove it #albeit it's probably like. a snake nose or something. ive written him as having a normal nose here though #cause im a coward and this is my sandbox of cowardice to play in.#anyways please do enjoy

36 notes · View notes