#I’m probably talking in circles

[hellonoblesky]

Repeating to myself over and over again that there is a multi-year time gap between rebels finale and Ashoka and Filoni movie version of HTTE so the Grysk conflict is probably concluded but by fucking god am I about to go rabid thinking about unresolved plots that have HUGE sway on a character because Thrawn has stuff to do and I love the htte triology but what is he doing there rn

#turtledove yells into the abyss #I’m literally going to be on a plane tmmr for like 6 hours this is going to be rotating in my head #Thrawn books in my brain!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!! #like it’s such a double edged sword for me because like on one hand YES I want to see htte trilogy adapted #but I absolutely do NOT want the Grysk plot to be brushed over #Like there is nothing that irks me more with Star Wars’ dual canons than a bit from legends being recanonized/adapted #but in the process of preservation of the original story they botch the current canonized characterization #Like there is absolutely a way to bring htte into canon. I don’t think you can take it word for word from the source tho #LIKE IM JUST RAMBLING RN but like #I’m so conflicted I’m having a lot of feelings #bc like. When I complain about the filoni interview I don’t want to sound like I’m woobifying him r anything #Bc I KNOW he’s a bad person. I know he is not a hero he is in factPretty morally bad!!! #He’s a villian with complex motives and driving forces whose ABLE to do good but let’s be fr the man looked the othr way w SLAVERY #he’s not a good man. #but on thr flipside I think it’s his capacity to do good and how he clings to what morals he has r rlly important #Especially bc like. Yk. His character trait where he’s kinda. self sacrificial?? #Like he would kill himself for the Ascendancy because it’s for ‘the good of the people’ #AND LIKE. Idk #I’m probably talking in circles

[absolutelyinlove]

just really fascinating how hannah is never allowed to team with the people she asks for and she gets asked to sit out events more often than men who avg top 10 to make it “easier to balance the teams” but she’s only played in 4 events (3 canon) and has an avg placement of 15th. really fascinating how whenever scott has a player he needs to “nerf” he uses low-ranking women and afab participants as fodder instead of putting them on teams where they’ll actually get a chance to improve and feel like they stand a chance. Really fascinating how when there’s a woman or afab participant who is too consistently good at the game to be used as a “nerf” teammate suddenly she’s just way too hard to balance so she’s left on the waitlist for 2 years and then even after getting into the event she can’t be expected to play every event she signs up for. surely it’s all just a coincidence! really really fascinating how hannah has spoken multiple times about how horrifically she’s treated by the mcc community just for. being a woman who is competitive and dares to care about her individual performance and tina openly talked about how demotivating it felt to be put on 10th-place-expected teams every time she signed up instead of ever having a chance to improve. and how the community REFUSED to hold jojo to the same standards as equally-well-performing men and demanded she prove herself a million times over before being allowed to be put in the same category as her male peers. but the people in charge who have the power to fix all of this see no issue with the way teams are constructed whatsoever. surely there’s no pattern!

a “for fun event” but one single participant has full control over who is and isn’t allowed to play and who is and isn’t allowed to be with the people they request to team with and instead of focusing on creating evenly matched teams the priority is ensuring no one wins TOO much. because god forbid the event be predictable. if only that was already possible because (most of) the games are already designed to prioritize a variety of different skills and therefore theoretically any given team could always win/lose. if only that was the entire point of a competitive tournament. if only someone involved would point out what an unnecessary waste of energy and cause for needless discourse and toxicity it is to make “team balancing” your end-all-be-all priority so that any and all criticism would stop being brushed off as “people complaining on twitter”. but i guess we’re just supposed to pretend all of this is necessary to keep the event “fun”. right

#m.cc discourse #<- mute this if u don’t care i probably won’t talk abt this more but if i do #genuinely just fucking infuriatinggggg most of this is copied from a rant in my twt circle #i just needed to rant More i’m just so irritated #sage.talking #negative

[arbitrarycategories]

what if I indulged my inner twelve year old and wrote crossover fanfiction

#it would be pjo x dc bc I’ve been reading a lot of batfam fic #I can’t stop brainstorming Tim as a demigod who encounters Grover Annabeth and Percy and just has to cope with that #tim calling Cassie: THERE ARE CRAZY PEOPLE HERE WHO SAY THEYRE DEMIGODS #Cassie: ooooh yeah. yeah I don’t run in those circles but if they say ur a demigod you should probably go with them #tim: how could you betray me like this #was Cassie also made from clay??? unfortunately I don’t know anything about Wonder Girl I’m so sorry #I want Tim to be a low-powered child of Aphrodite and when he finds out he’s just like aaa this explains why I’m so good at disguises #Gotham city has crazy levels of Mist bc it’s being patroned by Hecate #so most monsters don’t bother #also most intelligent monsters look at the batshit crazy mortals and are like. yeah we’ll stick to NY and Cali where the most demigods are #in my brain it’s actually Grover’s fault that the trio are in Gotham he wants to recruit Poison Ivy to help restore the Wild #percy and Annabeth insist on coming with to protect him and also bc they’re bored #they run into 20yo tim and grover is like DAMN how are you alive??? and Tim just has. no idea what the fuck they’re talking about #arbitrary speaks

[voiddemon]

I’m mentally ill im laying in bed and thinking about making a kine rig

#I could. it would be easy. #and that’s what upsets me #it wouldn’t take much effort. #if I made the body a super high quality circle texture I can just #stretch it based on the direction he’s looking #I would probably have to make an extra set of mouth textures but that isnt so bad #not much effort into the expressions if any #his eyes would be a bit fussy too but still probably doable #could maybe give his fins hair physics? #top and bottom one I mean #those will also need an extra texture I think? but not a huge deal #I’m talking about all the complications but the time loss of not having to do much of the other complicated stuff would be a huge time save #music make me lose control #rambles

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

.

#since everyone was talking about the - er - engagement discourse earlier #it reminded me of the rumours and articles that started swirling in early 2022 #and one of them (I think it was probably the daily mail) that said she had a ring that she only wore in private #but that they were very tightlipped about things and only their inner circle knew #which that right there says it was probably bullshit because if only their inner circle knew #then how the fuck would dm know since they were notoriously private lol #but like if that had any validity to it it very much screams secret/oath yet again #anyway it was all very sad whatever it was #everyone is better off now I’m sure etc

[lem-argentum]

oh yeah soo i might’v gotten bg.3 the other dayyy…. the experience thus far: “mm i probably won’t like anyone in this game ^^” *meets kar.lach* “Oh

#lem text #EHFKDJD . <3 #it’s fun i lov e combat and rolling dice <3. my guy is a wood half-elf rouge i can post him sometime if i get nicer pictures of him <3 :) #i’m shy talking about well-er known things so i probably wont talk about it much butttttt spins around in a circle <3. x)

[j-esbian]

i am once again begging people to learn how to recommend things. i’ve been seeing a couple posts lately about a league of their own that have honestly done a really poor job of selling it, not least because none of them actually say what it’s about

one essentially said “you guys need to watch it because it’s got queer woc, and if you don’t watch it, we’ll never get a season 2” which is coming at it backwards. why do i care about getting another season of a show i haven’t watched yet?

another said “if you liked our flag means death you should watch this, because they’re both gay and about real-life historical figures” which, while technically true, is missing the point of both shows. ofmd is a comedy about pirates in the early 16th century. a league of our own, from what i can tell (i had to google it, because none of those posts mention any of this) seems to be a drama about baseball in the early 20th century. what about those is similar

do we really need to keep having this discussion about not tokenizing stories?? because it does it a disservice to boil it down to “it’s good and you should watch it because it’s Diverse”

it’s like if i said, “hmm, i want to go clothes shopping, my closet feels stale,” and you told me, “i have just the thing,” and tried to give me a blank cardboard box with something inside. “what is it?” i ask, and you tell me, “it’s purple.”

but is it a top? pants? i don’t really wear skirts so i wouldn’t be interested. is it a turtleneck? i like those sometimes, but it’s really hard to pull them off. what material is it? i have sensory issues and i don’t like polyester. what if we’re not the same size and it doesn’t fit?

“it’s purple” you tell me. “you like purple. you’ll like it, trust me.”

#also the fact that everyone says to watch it but no one has said where #which i realize is probably because they have 🏴‍☠️ and expect other people will also #but it’s a bad habit to get into. if you’re recommending something you need to let people know how to get it #spoiler culture definitely contributes to this too. people don’t want to tell you anything that happens in case it Ruins the Surprise #i’m going to be generous and say that maybe these posts were written for a small circle of people and i am not in that conversation #but it’s something i see all the fucking time from like. everyone i know #i don’t taken reccs from my sibling or their gf anymore lol #like. boiling something down to ‘it’s gay so it’s your duty to watch it’ makes it feel like a chore #the last time i listened to that argument was years ago bc everyone was talking about steven universe #which like. was mediocre imo. i don’t think i’d ever have watched it otherwise but i didn’t hate it #i never really felt a spark of ‘oh i like this’ but i kept making myself keep up with it because I Had To #like don’t get me wrong. i will probably watch this show bc i love the 40s aesthetic #but y’all are doing it and yourselves no favors by talking about things in this way #i very much DO like purple but i’m gonna need a little more information first #mine

[iloveyoumorethansoup]

When u gotta do ribbon flowers for homework and give up before you truly start 🫠🫠

Giving up. Staring me me and me.

#the single blue petal? fantastic. looks just how it’s supposed to. it’s supposed to be 4 times that size tho🫠 #so I say. ok. we’ll just burn out some petals the old fashion hack and slash way. i need to make a consisten pattern for that #so I say ok. let’s try the wind wheel. nah. let’s not #to be fair. i needed a pentagon and I cut that thing with not a single measurement in mind #so. that one’s on me. and I super glued it cause the thought of hand stitching at 2am just is a no #i think I might do individual triangle petals for that #would probably just be easier. No pentagons #the purple rose tho. that’s beautiful #10/10 #the likelihood I do a ton of roses like that is so deeply non 0 #my plan for the flower pot is to just make a crochet circle so I can stick in some stems and they’ll stay in there #and I can switch out the flowers if need be #ughhhh #it’s gotta be done by tomorrow night #kill me #shoutout to roomie tho for saying she’ll try and help #I’m like oh it’s just folding things and half and burning them!! now it’s just straight up set things on fire #i burnt my fingers :(( #this project is not fun for me rn #soup talks

[potatoes-tomatoes]

Pride is supposed to be month of education and of the community’s struggle with oppression, documenting and retelling history for younger ppl learn from, engaging in open dialogue with the silent majority who still dissent, not alienating or ostracizing them, but conversing with the hope that we are to be seen, heard and respected.

I’m kinda damn sick of how commodified my own sexuality has become. Like. It’s a holiday, and once that holiday’s passed the decorations and sentiments are stored away in the attic for the rest of the year. and those who don’t celebrate it (i.e, share the same belief behind it) simply stand aside quietly and tolerate it. Despite what corporations have made it, i’m bi 24/7, not just during June. But the ads and the merchandising are so glaringly loud and disingenuous and off the mark that I can see in the extremely religious conservative circle I live in, that Pride is achieving the opposite of its goal. Every year my family and family friends dread the month, and double down that we’re “pushing an agenda” or “trying to trick people into sin”. It sucks. Companies and brands are tonally deaf with good intentions at best and patronizing at worst.

I’m just complaining into the void. June is almost over and I’ve not once felt comfortable celebrating my own sexuality because the month like. glaringly illuminates it, but never educates ppl about it?? it feels so overbearing and I have to see my family and family friends make more intolerant comments and jokes than usual. Idk. Despite what’s advertised, we (america) aren’t as progressive as we think we are. We’re kinda… going backwards? It’s estranging the ppl who are key to our acceptance— the opposing side lol.

#cel speaks #i’m probably gonna piss someone off bc that’s how these internet things usually go so 🤷🏻‍♀️ #and also i’m glad hollywood/ social media lend us a powerful and large platform. I really am! #but… there’s no attempt to reach others who’re still in disagreement. or extend an olive branch #I get the sentiment of ‘we’re here and we’re queer deal with it’! #that assertiveness was and still is vital but i really wish we could extend an olive branch #instead all the ads and merch I see are just. half assed attempts to pander to us? and ignore like actual deeper issues still prevailing #i think i’m talking in circles now. ima shut up for now lol #i think this all came to a front when I saw that damn bugs bunny pride banner on twitter lmaoooo #i had such mixed emotions… 1 bc Bugs is like. NEVER sincere so writing wise that threw me off lol and 2… #the dialogue was so incredibly vague and vapid. Bugs sounded like he was giving a generic holiday greeting. that’s when it hit me y’know?? #like WB cycles thru throwaway lines like ‘happy holidays!’ and now it’s ‘be who you are!’ #lmao yeah i fuckin would if i didn’t risk being disowned hfjfjf or risking real world consequences for coming out

[munamania]

it’s so amazing to think about the variety of life out there. someone out there got their dream job today. someone got to pet a little dog or spend time in the sun with their friends. someone probably got proposed to. someone is going to their first college party. someone is having their first kiss first fuck first love. and me? well. i am probably going to listen to colin morgan read me a fairytale

#again. #and avoid thinking about the crippling and unyielding loneliness #that has underscored the last several years of my life and probably rendered me unlovable. lol. #damn girl get a journal yeah. i’m going to i journaled this morning but i am so so tired and i need to make dinner but i am so tired. #i’ll feel better tomorrow never trust how you feel abt your life after 9pm etc it’s fine. #and this is not all because of film girl but of course that is adding to the misery. that and the fact that once again literally #everyone around me is getting into little relationships and it’s soooooo fucking cute. and at one point in my life #i remember that happening and going i just know this is gonna happen for me. and oh. i waited one time then too. but i was 15. so it was #less sad then probably. but anyway life goes in circles but brother i do not think this one is going to complete its round #i’m gonna go make some fucking rice or mac and cheese or something. ignore me. hangry tired sad issues haver. #abby talks

[builtlikeastickofcelery]

^^me realizing my friend may actually not be my friend or understand me as a person or care about me at all outside of a shallow perception of me based on my recent behavior despite the fact they have known me for 6 years

#this is a vent #sucks to realize that someone never really cared about you #or at least never bothered to show it #and I mean we’ve always been very “friends who are super different” #but I didn’t think about how that might play into them not actually being the type of friend I need? #this feels very middle school navigating friendships help book #but I seriously feel like shit for not realizing this #that they never stopped to actually look at me or how I act #in the way I try to see how they are at certain times #i could name so many things they do differently from how they normally are #when they’re tired their face twitches #every time they swipe something o their phone they make a full circle with their thumb before doing it again #they act like they’re not touchy unless they’re with friends #and yet I’m realizing that they probably don’t know any of these things /I/ do #that I know for a fact my other #better friends do #and Honestly I only stopped to think about this recently #because I was talking with one of our shared friends about another one of our friendsnot taking them seriously #so I offered to help them talk it through #only to be told by this person that I shouldn’t or can’t #because “you can’t mediate” #they didn’t have a reason why #they just said I couldn’t #and maybe this is just me being insecure and wanting to Prove I Am Capable #And Useful To The People In My Life #but it just stuck with me???? #that they thought I was incapable of that #and I KNOW why they said that #it’s because of how I present myself #because I project a lot of confidence and carelessness (cough rise leo cough im not bringing him into this tho)

[trollbreak]

I should really draw peipre round later

#ik there’s a better term for what I’m talking abt but I can’t remember it so. circle head. possibly plushy shaped. small canvas so I can’t #fuss too much over the details and just have fun. Yk? #like I did with pidge and mawris and pr0t0 and vrayan and probably others

[selfconsumerofmywoes]

i can’t do accents unless i’m angry or drunk. then i’m very welsh

#either way i’m pissed #i talk and its probably something weird #(please help i’m walking in circles saying ‘howell jenkins’ because it’s really fun to say in south walian)

[asexualastarion]

Just saw someone complain about how people only ever talk about childhood media franchises like cartoons, pokemon, etc. and never branched on to Adult Interests. dude I think you’re just online too much

#I just think it’s cause you’re On Tumblr dude #I guarantee if you walk up to like a 30 year old in a grocery store they probably wouldn’t have played the latest Pokémon game #like. people who play Pokémon and watch kids cartoons are definitely in the minority. they are just a very vocal minority online #I have interests that are children’s media and interests that aren’t. no one wants to talk about like. weighy novels online cause it’s not #like memeable and easy to talk about? like it’s literally just a symptom of being online #idk I’m not being eloquent. most adults don’t know what the fuck the owl house is or are able to name more than a couple Pokémon if any #it’s just people online and the online circles you are a part of #or maybe you just hang out with a certain circle irl dude you don’t have to be mean about it just get different friends

[mars-ipan]

I DIDN’T FALL ASLEEP IN ART HISTORY !!!!

#marzi speaks #maybe i’m just bored of europe. today’s lecture was abt native american (as in the continents) art and i was enraptured so #i wish we had more time to talk abt it :( i wish there was more surviving art to talk about #we’ll probably circle back around as we move into modern art but like. i wanna know more about this too #i don’t think it’s my lecturer’s fault tho. art history here only recently expanded to be global and i don’t think the curriculum- #-gives much of a shit abt anything outside of europe #my dad wrote an essay about aztec art when he was in college. maybe i should ask him to find it and send me photos so i can read it again #it’s been a while since the 90s but maybe i can do more research on the pieces he talks about

[shroomierambles]

ugghhhhh I have feelings for a friend, which literally hasn’t happened since like early highschool :’)

cause the way my feelings work, I don’t catch romantic feelings for friends once we’re already friends. I caught feelings when we were getting to know each other & I thought it was mutual, but turns out I’m 90% sure I was wrong & now we’re platonic buds, becoming really close friends. and I’m not used to dealing with having romantic feelings & pining over a friend :’)

#cause I dont catch big feelings too often& it just so happened that the other times Ive started getting to know someone &developed feelings- #it ended up with us getting together #So I really haven’t had to deal with unrequited pinning in like 7 years #he’s very quickly speedrunning it to the inner friendship circle too #It’s extraordinarily rare that I find someone I’m comfortable messaging with everyday& talking to so much without getting socially burnt out #& it’s fucking awesome that I’ve gained a really dope close friend #BUT ALSO the more I keep getting to know him… I just like him so much :’) #I’ll probably tell him one day but like not till I feel confident that it wouldn’t make our friendship weird or anything #that would make me very sad cause it’s hard for me to find friendship like this & I don’t wanna mess it up #but if I never tell him I’ll probably regret it. so I’ll leave it at an Eventually™ #shroomie rambles