#I'm too unoriginal for this

[exceptionally-stupid]

#Silence #arknights #shitpost #this is one of the first things I'm making by way of drawing pad #I will continue to be annoying about it until I'm halfway decent #more to come #is this recognizable as silence? #the way medic operators sometimes just throw medicine at people when they don't use arts has always been funny to me #I hope this isn't too unoriginal #especially considering how shitty the art is #art

[flameswallower]

it's funny how clinically depressed people, regardless of age and life experiences, talk like thousand-year-old guilt-ridden vampires: weary of the burden of consciousness, jaded beyond belief by the lives they've taken and the empires they've seen rise and fall, unable to wash the metaphorical blood from their hands and teeth

#me too this post is about me too you guys i'm allowed to joke about this #i mean i'm not depressed right NOW but i will be again #and i will be just as goofy and unoriginal about it as i always am

[and-stir-the-stars]

~

@dire-kumori MMMM. EVIL. pure, unadulterated evil you have brought unto my dash, I love it.

Just. Evan trying so hard to reconcile the image of this stranger covered in blood beside him in the next loop, except the memory is so hazy he doesn't know what to make of it. At first he wants to hope that he was wrong and this stranger isn't actually working alongside the animatronics, but the more Ev tries to remember that cycle, the hazier the memory gets. And Evan can't stop thinking about how the very next thing that happened after he saw the stranger bleeding beside him, was getting attacked by the monsters. He opened his eyes and saw the stranger beside him-- just lying there, not even PRETENDING to be trying to help him anymore; the stranger killed himself just to get away from Evan, and he just left Ev alone to die.

When Evan wakes in the next loop, he can't even muster the energy to get out of bed. He knows the monsters will drag him out of bed if he doesn't get up, even without the stranger yelling that particular fact at him, but he can't help but just lay there.

The stranger tries keeping the doors shut alone, apparently having decided to keep pretending to help. Evan still can't get out of bed. He only has the effort to sob: "I can't do this anymore. I don't want to do this anymore. Please just stop!"

Maybe, eventually, Mikey gives up and curls up next to Evan in the bed with his arms wrapped protectively around his little brother. Or Maybe Michael scoops Evan up and tries running them both out of the house. Either way, Evan doesn't have the energy to fight against the stranger's hands on him. Either way, they both end up dead.

And speaking of Evan’s memories being confusing jumbles. Before Mikey tries revealing himself, back when Evan still thinks of Mikey as some stranger, maybe Michael has to listen to Evan beg for "Mikey" to come save him.

Evan doesn't remember who this "Mikey" that he is screaming for is anymore. When Evan was alive, he thought of his big brother Mike as being the adult he was supposed to be able to turn to for help, the person who would make everything okay. Now, dead and stuck in this nightmare, Evan has the vague sense that there was a Mikey in his life, someone who was supposed to be there for him and make everything better. Evan holds onto that single memory, that one vague hope that his mysterious Mikey might help him.

It encourages Mike to risk telling Evan the truth in one cycle, except when Evan learns that the Mikey he's been begging for help from and the cruel Foxy-mask boy in his memories are one and the same...

~

~

Evan is *outraged.* He's dealt with a lot of pain and suffering and betrayal, but THIS?

Evan is in the middle of screaming at Mike thay he can try to be a good person all he wants but will NEVER make up for what he did when one of the animatronics gets past their defenses. Evan doesn't even notice at first; he's still mid-sentence screaming at Michael as the animatronic tears him apart.

Then Evan dies, and the cycle restarts, and Evan Forgets. Except, Michael can't help but notice that Evan never screams for "Mikey" to save him ever again.

And don't get me started on THIS.

~

~

After getting so offended at me calling you a monster, I offer you the chance for a happy ending where Mikey and Evan resolve their issues and move on, and you teAR IT TO PIECES?? FOR SHAME

i mean, don't get me wrong, it's a beautifully horrific ending and i love it, but holy heck. I am going to need 3-5 business days to emotionally recover!!!

Michael slowly fading as he is FORCED to realize he can't save Evan after all. Evan’s hope of finally being at peace savagely crushed, as he is forced to remain stuck in the simulation until the software and hardware his spirit is attached to slowly crumbles with time and too much use.

And the idea of him (and Mike) getting recorded onto Help Wanted is PHENOMENAL.

I'm just imagining Evan cowering inside the Night Terrors/Fnaf 4 section of the game. Despite the lifetimes worth of awful memories he has inside that room, it's the first familiar place that Evan stumbles across, and he craves the comfort of the familiarity of his prison. He much prefers it to the unknown, and he's been stuck in this room for so long that the outside world (or, well, the other virtual recreations of the various games) are too big, too scary, too overwhelming. Besides, Evan has learned from his father’s simulation that bad things happen when he tries leaving this room.

#Excuse me as i get self-indulgent for a moment: i am choosing to believe that an alternate #Ending for this au can tie in what we learned from the GGY reveal-- #That Gregory was in all likelihood probably a victim of the vr headset too #Au of an au in my head where gregory encounters Evan’s spirit in the Night Terrors game #And Gregory agrees to let Evan haunt him. Best friends forever. #Okay self-indulgencies over. I'm not completely sure what glitchtrap is but if g.trap IS william #Then wouldn't it be just awful if manipulative mastermind william found evan and tried to get his son to join him on his side? #Though evan probably has too many trust issues for that to be successful. He takes one look at will and bursts into tears #Someone get this kid to the foxy pirate ride fr. Give him some fun and time to decompress :( #I would also like to point out how mean it would be if evan died so many times in the Nightmare that his #Memory of Mike killing him is all hazy and wrong too. Maybe instead of remembering his first death as a prank gone wrong #(Not that ev saw it as a prank but whatever) evan remembers it as michael *purposefully* feeding him to nightmare Fredbear #Just for an added dose of angst. #Also damn this au needs a name now too... #Nightmare au feels too unoriginal... ig i gotta think about what to call this au now #Also i would like to point out that me calling you a monster was 100% a joke #Just in case that wasn't clear

[cityboys-modelgirls]

i have so many animatics queueing in my to do list........😫

#p text #i'm unoriginal so i wanna do a “from the start” zosan animatic #but i've got a zolu/straw hat based animatic i really want to make too.... #amongst original projects

[thefiresofpompeii]

revolutionary optimism ... wish i had an ounce of it. wish any of it rang true

#wish i was revolutionary #i'm not. i'm a reactionary defeatist #i've seen how it all pans out. i'm not getting better. disco elysium is too painful to think about #the things i know and cannot correlate are eating me alive #the way it is is not compatible with how it should be but it will forever fall short #depression feels like lucidity. like contacts on your eyes where there was once a filmy blur #is it 'the illness talking' or am i seeing through to the heart of things? #i remember reading cioran at 16. i tried to block his theory out. it keeps flooding back #i don't understand anything anymore. i can't kill myself either i have a delusion keeping me here. the odd #delusion that my death should serve a purpose too #maybe i should set myself on fire and pretend it's to raise awareness of the hopelessness and western lack of empathy? #self-immolation is unoriginal now but still bold. maybe i should do it for gaza. pretend i'm being governed by anything other than a #suicidal impulse. oh we're not allowed to despair? if only this was even the beginning of being the source of my despondency. i've been #like this for years and years. in fluctuating states but never gone away #zoloft is probably making things 'worse' but that is subjective. i see the world for what it is now. empty and soulless all the way down #jamie.txt

[dearedwardteach]

I open tumblr just to see your tags 🙏 it’s a highlight of my day

armys don't scare me. i've been on the internet for fifteen years and i used to be a directioner, jungkook fans wish they were as insane as me 👍🏽

#ksjhfjksjhdjksjd ily too #i finally listened to golden btw #(cant believe i wasted 30 minutes of my time on this when i could have been listening to indigo instead but ANYWAYS) #my take is: still not sure how 3d is supposed to be about heterosexual sex and the term champagne confetti still has me rolling on the floo #i guess i kinda like closer to you? but i like major lazer's stuff usually and it's clearly not my fav sound he's ever put out so yk #grasping at straws there #his falsetto in seven is good but that's about it with this song #overall jk's voice when it's not completely overlaid with autotune is nice he's doing what he does best #but his voice is not enough to save the overall mediocrity of the songs #(also bc i guess his voice is the one i like less in the band so ofc it won't hook me like jin's or tae's singing voices might) #(but that's very personal in no way i'm saying he's a bad singer) #standing next to you sounds like a rip off from a michael jackson song so it's not that it's bad necessarily #just that it's... not... original. at all? i mean the song is very representative of the whole album in that way. #it's not that i dislike it necessarily just that it sounds like a cover album more than anything #the only thing i truly hate about golden is that i don't listen to bts to listen to mediocre white men's music and that's all that album is #yes or no is a skip boring as fuck #please don't change is. lyrically and musically underwhelming but i do like his voice? id say it's a white people festival song which. yeah #hate you. white man christmas movie song. skip. #somebody is ewwwww i do not like his voice in it at all and the rest is uninteresting so yk SKIP #too sad to dance. unoriginal literally have nothing to say about it. white man song. skip #shot glass full of tears. once again it's not that it's bad per se. id even say i like it. its just that it sounds like somebody else's son #this is so frustrating!!!! gaaaaaaaah!!! everything about this is frustrating! #id say im disappointed but it's what i expected since seven came out so im not. #overall boring and disappointing i beg u poc artists dont let white men make music for u thanks for coming to my ted talk #raplinenthusiasts #ask #answered #it's not even that golden is horrendous it's just... mediocre. idk what's worse tbh #anyways not tagging all that i might be insane but im not gonna consciously invite the crazy armys in #thank god for rapline huh

[maddy-ferguson]

the feminine urge to come out to my sister and my mom

#i'm very unoriginal and. susceptible to suggestion #if someone eats an apple on tv i'm gonna want to eat an apple #i think about it often actually especially my sister because sometimes i wanna tell her certain things but i can't because i'm not out to #her #and it's not like my mom wouldn't be accepting so if i tell my sister i might as well tell her too like get it over with #but i also DON'T wanna tell them because it's gonna be awkward. feelings #i did watch someone come out on tv yesterday (leighton from tslocg) it's funny #and like i say: brf slt

[thornsnvultures]

Sorry to disappoint but I really didn't like the balloon animal shifter book. I went in knowing there was a sexual abuse thing going on with the plot and I hoped that it wouldn't feature so heavily, but it did. I'm tired of romance books (even the silly ones) relying so heavily on slavery/ abduction/sexual assault to create tension and conflict.

Dark fiction has it's place, but goddamn it's been so fucking pervasive in the romance genre, especially in the monsterfucker scene. Even the fluffy ones! Like uh-oh my neighbor's an alien! What kind of quirky adventure will we get on- oh he's on the run from slavers. Oh no the fmc was kidnapped into sexual slavery and he has to save her. Like!! Please !!! I'm dying out here.

Anyway don't read it lol like you can if you want a something on the edge of dark fiction, but's not silly enough to bother with if that's what you're looking for. Read the door one. That one still had murder in it but like, there was enough silly and spice to make up for it.

It fell short for me but if anyone has any other weird books they wanna rec lmk

#i read the warnings before going in but sometimes the book can make up for what i feel are short comings in other ways #this one did not #so I'm left with that feeling of 'were doing this again??' #it feels unoriginal and i was just bored #the sex was too weird to be hot (for me) and i didn't care for the characters like i did in the door one #im not into enemies to lovers where one character is just a piece of shit for no reason #idk it was rough

[radiantaerynsvn]

someone kick my ass into finishing the final touches on my aeryn sun art because it's been taking me too long and enough is Enough

#like its literally just the final details and i'm procrastinating because i'm scared i'll just end up hating my work #i keep seeing other peoples art and not feeling good enough and i know thats what i Shouldnt do #i'm just an insecure little people pleasing idiot what can i say i never think anyone will like what i make #i wish i could switch off my brain seriously it holds me back in too many ways #how do people just exist and do stuff and make stuff and talk to people without doubting every single thing do you know how jealous i am #anyway my problem is that i cant figure out a simpler art style because i strive to realism and then i feel unoriginal and also i usually #dont succeed well enough #anyway excuse the tag ramble im just So frustrated with myself <3

[lesbianlovelanguage]

Thunder in Our Hearts

my contribution to the flood of fix-it fics <3 read it on AO3 here!

Part Two

-----

Billy woke up the first time in who knows how long. He wasn’t even sure he wanted to know how much time he had been in this hellscape, where the only thing he could do was replay his memories like a horror movie made specifically to torture him. There were only so many times he could watch his mom leave, the disappointment on his father’s face morph into violent anger, Max crying over his dying body. 

There were only so many times, and he was terrified when he realized he wasn’t sure what he would do when he finally snapped. He’d hurt so many people already, had been hurt so many times before. What new hell would he unleash unto the world? He was afraid, and tired and a million other things he couldn’t process, so he had slept.

Except he wasn’t asleep anymore and he wasn’t sure why.

He opened his eyes to find that he was in the same world he had been in since he died, a twisted version of Hawkins covered in vines and ash. Though he wasn’t sure why or where he was going, he found himself walking through downtown Hawkins. He knew it was the Shadow Monster’s will, and there was no point in fighting it anymore. Max was safe. Her nerdy friends were safe. He couldn’t hurt anyone anymore. Not here, trapped in what he could only assume was hell.

He passively watched the world go by as the Shadow Monster directed his body, trying to empty his mind again before the memories could start. It wasn’t very long before his body stopped and he tried to look around some. Most of this place looked the same, especially the further you got into the woods. The oppressive blue light, the vines that slitered like snakes. The only variation was what appeared to be decaying tombstones, all crumbled marble and obscured names. This was a new one for him. The Shadow Monster had never taken him to the graveyard before. 

Dear Billy, she started. I don’t even know if you can hear this. 

He could, but why? What was she doing here? It had to have been another sick game for the Shadow Monster to play, trying to break Billy’s already broken soul.

He and my mom started getting into fights. Bad fights. 

Fuck. Now he knew it was a hallucination. He knew Neil loved Susan. As much as his father could love someone. He certainly valued their picture perfect family too much to jepordize it. This was just the Shadow Monster trying to fuck with him. Still, he couldn’t help but send out a useless thank you to the universe that Max had gotten away from him.

And sometimes I imagine myself running to you, pulling you away. I imagine that if I had, you would still be here.

Billy wanted to cover his ears and scream, but he couldn’t make his arms move. He wanted the Shadow Monster to quit with this bullshit. Hadn’t he suffered enough? Why couldn’t it let him drift away?

I imagine that we could’ve become friends. Good friends. Like a real brother and sister. And I know that’s stupid. You hated me. I hated you. But I thought that maybe we could try again.

No. It wasn’t stupid. He wanted that too. He hadn’t known how to be a brother, how to open himself up and use his words rather than fists, but god he wanted to try again. Try to be better, for her. Try to be someone she would want to call brother.

But I think that maybe a part of me died that day too.

I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.

Something snapped deep inside his chest at Max’s apologies. This may have been an attempt to shatter him, but the Shadow Monster had taken a wrong turn with that one. Instead of hiding his wounded pride, he did what he’d always done. He fought like a wild animal, teeth bared as he desperately tried to regain control over his own body. He wanted to run, to scream, to cry. He wanted to be free, to have control again. He wanted to find Max and tell her not to cry over him. He wasn’t worth it.

And then a fog began to roll in, and through the haze he could see the outline of a figure begin to flicker into existence. No. No. He’d died to save her. Why the fuck was she here now? Fucking brat can’t stay out of fucking trouble.

No, it had to be fake. Just like all of the other memories. But why did this one feel so much more real?

He felt the Shadow Monster begin to drag his body forward and a new force push him to start speaking.

“Max. I’ve been waiting to hear those words Max. Waiting so very long,” the Shadow Monster lied. Billy had never wanted to see his little shitbird sister again. At least then he would have known she was safe. But instead, she was here and he couldn’t tell if she was real or just a nightmare.

“But it wasn’t the full truth, was it Max?” The Shadow Monster had finally pulled him close enough that he could see her face through the fog, and it felt like a punch to the gut. Seeing her eyes puffy from crying, fear clouding her face. It was an expression he was all too familiar with, having been the cause of it himself over the years they’d known each other. But this time it wasn’t just himself. This time it was some other thing, something Billy could have protected her from. Had died trying to protect her from.

He ached to reach out and touch her. Surprisingly, the Shadow Monster allowed him this, moving his arm to touch her face more gently than he had ever managed to in his life. She felt so real. Could this really be something other than a trick?

“You know, I think there’s a part of you, buried somewhere deep, that wanted me to die that day.” He was forced to admit his deepest fear, to watch Max’s face twist down in guilt, to feel his cold dead heart ache. He couldn’t blame her though.

“That was maybe even relieved.” Of course she would be. He was her monster, her shadow in the closet. Her Neil. God, he wanted to puke. Instead, he redoubled his fight against the Shadow Monster’s control, if only so he could just run away. “Happy.”

Max said something in response, but it fell on deaf ears as Billy poured his concentration into getting something, any part of his body back in control. He felt the Shadow Monster responding, but it was all a blur. Until…

“And why, late at night, you have sometimes wished to follow me.” Something cracked deep inside of him, inside the part that had laid dormant ever since the kids had locked him in the sauna. He sobbed in pain, and it must have been strong enough to do something as he felt a single tear drip down his face. Maybe he could do it. Break free from this neverending nightmare. 

The Shadow Monster must have felt the crack too though, as it spit out some threat that tasted like bile in the back of his throat, because as soon as it finished using his voice to intimidate Max, he felt himself be violently ripped away from her, from the graveyard. The last thing he saw as he began to pass out was a true monster, something that looked like it had been ripped out of a horror comic, leered over Max as she tumbled over the raised edge of the grave. 

He hadn’t fought to stay conscious since the battle in the mall, but he felt himself strain as hard as he could until nothingness consumed him once again.

-----

s/o to @ihni and @hrngrvlv for being amazing cheerleaders! Thank you guys so much

#it has to get worse before it gets better #but I'm working on a part 2 already i promise! #also yes i know the title is insanely unoriginal but I've been listening to the song on a loop for 48 hours #tw dissociation #billy's not doing too hot in this one #billy hargrove #max mayfield #season 4 fix-it #tay writes

[bat-the-misfit]

person: if i post things this person likes they'll think i like what they like and then they'll like me more!!! :D

enneagram 4s seeing these posts directed at them: this fucking bitch is trying to steal my identity now i fucking hate them

#trust me i'm a four #if you want a four's attention that's not how you're gonna get it 👍 #also bc you're being fake and we hate inauthenticity 👍 #in case anyone is wondering no no one is trying to get my attention lmao #but they're trying to get the attention of this person i know is a fellow four #and it's so obvious it's pathetic #if it seems pathetic to me imagine to the person #like that's so unoriginal #like yea it's nice to have smth in common with someone but not when they're faking it #or they're WAY TOO MUCH similar to us bc again loss of identity

[dendroculus]

i need a new signature recipe and i really think stoner potatoes is it these things fuck beyond belief. it goes like, cut up 4 potatoes (i did small chunks like home fries but you could wedge them)

put turmeric garam masala and curry powder on (amount doesn't matter but use more turmeric because it's good)

heat up oil (BIG pan).

cook it.

put salt on at some point.

stab with fork occasionally to see if it's done and this is crucial: turn the heat up at the end to get em crispy (idk if this was necessary but it was fun)

#talking to myself #thank you india for making spices #this is so unoriginal but it is so fuckin goooooood #perfect for like a side or some shit idk i'm too poor to have multiple meals at once

[ascendent]

hate to be a hater but tlou gay romance might've actually affected me if not for the cliche and ableist euthanasia plotline

#no i'm lying i hated it before that. but oh my god #i have seen this beat for beat SO many times before ugh #like i support right to die but must every story about disability end this way #how meaningful is your “gay romance doesn't end at 30” story #if it's secretly a “life ends at disability” story instead!!! #FUCK #also i’m sorry it was just. it was just really boring too #the dialogue was predictable #the beats were predictable #even the swelling romantic string instrumentals have literally been used in everything from shutter island to fucking arrival (both of whic #i might add) #but really what should i expect from the episode whose prelude replicated an entire sequence from 28 days later beat for beat with only min #you are fooling yourself if you call this some “great love story.” hbo is so pro at marketing half-baked #unoriginal content as “prestige” that it will be eaten up as such by prestigedramapilled suckers without any critical thought but the thing #it’s not! it’s not the greatest love story or the best tv adaptation you’ve ever seen. it’s not even good #don't tell me your life story

[fairy-ganj-mother]

so sick of the edm community and it breaks my heart</3 i've been going to these kinds of events for 10 years this year and lately I come away feeling disillusioned and frustrated after shows. I'm sick of meeting fucking wooks because like it's not "nice to meet you" anymore when we've met 10 times in the last 6 months and I remember every time but you're too fucked up to remember any of it. I'm sooooooo sick of a lineup of five white guys being billed as "diverse" because they all make very slightly different dubstep. I'm sick of the oversaturation of edm that all sounds the same bc people are just tryna make a living off partying instead of actually innovating and pushing new sounds. everyone is either on too high of a horse or just straight too high to interact with. I don't want to say it wasn't like this bc it probably was but I def wasn't as acutely aware of this part of the scene 10 years ago when we still practiced PLUR and shit.

#I miss the glowy vibes of community but plur is dead #just too many egos and drugs and all male lineups and an oversaturation of boring ass unoriginal sounds #trench brostop [be real its way closer to brostep than riddim ugh] and 140 are the worst for unoriginal sounds #like i used to think house music was boring but like the dirtybird label for example is way more innovative than the DDD label #literally fuck ddd lmao. #the chokehold they have on the scene is unwarranted #it's all descending chromatic basslines with a trash-can snare at 140 bpm #i've made 140 its boring and easy compared to like actually expressing myself thru music #so i'm also on a high horse and have an ego bc i'm critical of the music #but being critical of music is also standard for people who like to explore and discover new music #i still want friends in the scene but around music not drugs and who are willing to criticize it not just put DJs on pedestals #and i don't like 140 anymore and think it's blowing up disproportionately #I know trench like subtronics is 'fun'..... #i have never really liked that tho hahahaaha #I liked excision for a bit when i was still intense with rolling and shit in 2015-2017 and i get it #but respectfully molly and brostep are not for me anymore and the genre is boring when ur not rolling lol #subtronics blew up too fast too #also the just lack of women getting opportunities without some caveat #it's so gross #like maybe i'm too deep in in the scene now that i know too much about nationwide promoters and venues and how they treat women #also wook is not a good word btw and never has been??? #it felt like we were ironically using it in 2017-2019 to describe when we forgot things or were too fucked up #now ppl use it as an identifier that they're 'in the scene' and its gross #being a wook is bad #bring back wook shaming....lmao #fuck edm i guess lol #moving to denver - the mecca - ruined it for me lmao #t #edit to add - the g jones fan base is a notable exception and i love them so much<3 caverns and rrx were both amazing this year #i made friends at both those shows

[causticsunshine]

.

#not even gonna lie to yall im moments away from pulling up all the moots i'm finding make fun of the whole zayn situation #or fully thinking this man mansplaining manipulating and begging for pussy is just funny entertaining not at all weird/concerning? #and just being like hey _ you think this shit is funny? you too _? #idk maybe i'm irate because i don't find a cishet man fetishing a bisexual woman and using her for sex shit #when he can FULLY pull himself funny? especially when he was talking to her the way he was the whole time too?? #and about women in general? come ON #im not gonna lie though some of you arent even mutuals or people i like im just sick of seeing your asses everywhere #with your unoriginal unfunny mid ass takes on things and people kissing your ass for it #like oh cool so you're also like this ok! good to know! #just like oomf said on twitter so many of you are spineless jesus fucking christ #alex talks

[winter-spark]

And if I say this is what my wips are like

(Is that good advertisement? Does it make you want to read them? I will try to hurry up in finishing them. They're both much longer than I anticipated but one is like 6 chapters and the other... Hmmm (I've recently finished chapter 9, and have scenes written that could end up in chapters like 10-12 but then the aftermath of that will probably be one or two more chapters... but if I can, I'll smash chapters together like chapters 1 & 2 together will be chapter 1, it messes with my advertisement plan but that's a bonus project anyway and I'll worry about it later) maybe 14 maybe 7 chapters. Both of them started as one shots tho. Granted, the second one I'm talking about was supposed to be a long one shot, it's still too long to be a one-shot now)

#not gonna tag this properly #i don't want to be precieved but the fanbase too much this time or how can I post these anonymously later #I'm unoriginal tho #My wips are very different from each other tho #Even if that's a core... point(? Idk the word) in them #There's a third one that that can add to that count but that one I already know would be longer than both of these & its a bit more complex #So there's a pin in it for now #lol this has been in my drafts since 2 days after that was twted