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shinjisdone · 4 months

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To Soften a Warrior’s Heart (Vinland Saga; Thorfinn; Part 8)

In which you have joined Askeladd’s band…and grow closer to the Son of Thors. Though it is more difficult than anyone can could ever imagine…

[Headcanons of how it would be like to meet and crawl your way into Thorfinn’s heart (based on season 1; both platonic and romantic)]

Part 1 is here - meeting Thorfinn at the age of 14 and how he is at that age

Part 2 is here - meeting Thorfinn at the age of 16/17 + headcanons of growing closer (slightly following s1 story)

Part 3 is here - blooming friendship with Thorfinn (slightly following s1 story)

Part 4 is here - Thorfinn unwittingly opening his heart as he realizes he does not want you to die

Part 5.1 is here - sweet things Thorfinn would do for you (headcanons)

Part 5.2 is here - other seet things Thorfinn would do for you (headcanons)

Part 6 is here - meeting Canute and becoming his guard - Thorfinn accepts your relationship and bond

Part 7 is here - Canute grieving over Ragnar and Thorkell catching up; Thorfinn leaves you alone for revenge

Part 9 is here - Meeting Leif and Thorfinn dueling Askeladd; Losing while Askeladd told him the truth of his constant losses

Part 10 is here - Thorfinn and you bound by heart; Promises of Vinland broken and abandoned

Tag list: @luopenis , @jinsecho , @mitsureigen , @theknightssecrets

[Mentions of murder, death, war, slave trade, harrasment against women and whatever awful things happened in the viking era. Only mentioned and used as examples. Mostly gender-neutral examples but female-leaning ones are there, too.]

[This part will specifically mention: conversations about love in general (but hinted at to be the Christianity's view of unconditional love. I tried to have it a bit more character-focused), qestioning your bond with Thorfinn, Thorfinn being stupid, speeding through the plot because Canute and Askeladd are the main characters now I guess]

You're Gonna Make Me Go, You're Gonna Make Me Drown...

The snow is cold.

Even as everything is barren and clad in a gravely sick and whitest cloud of snow to let the prince know it is a dream, the snow below still feels cold.

He sees the blood on Ragnar and he knows how cold he feels as well but compared to all that he has known in his life, the rest of the world seemed far colder.

The man stays warm even as he begged him not to go. As he threw caution to the wind at his wise words of loss, of how he must awaken and grow.

He tossed it all aside.

Yet the outside world is harsh and forced his awakening with a splatter of blood.

Canute awakened and saw a familiar back. Under him he could not feel the cold of the white snow of the blankets he laid upon as another round of blood dared to taint his skin.

A viking he reckoned as Björn bellowed like a yet-to-be-seen beast as he threw his arm back yet again to cause another blow to a skull. His eyes wide and milky as he wildly smashed about him. To the left, was the priest with his alcohol. In front of him, with their back facing him, was you.

"...You've woken up now, finally." You soberly began as you watched the one-sided fighting, "Björn and the rest of the band are fighting over you, prince. Whoever wins gets to keep you...and everyone but Björn is ready to abandon Askeladd."

"...Everybody but Björn and Thorfinn."

You explain the fighting before you and the one behind the hills. Askeladd taking hostage and Thorfinn dueling for his right to kill him. You, are stuck here.

The atmsophere is awkward. It was as if the roars of battle did not exist, as if the bloodbath before did not exist - rather there was a silence that was drowning. Looking over your shoulder, you saw that Canute bore the same demure face as you.

"...I've had a dream..."

He began with the faintest of smiles...

"...Ragnar was there and he bid goodbye. He's gone, I know that...now," He seemed to hesitate as he took a deep but shaky breath, "Now...there is no one in the world left who loves me anymore..."

You look back to the ground below you. The snow under had long melted, your hands red and freezing from the contact of it. Your voice barely found the strength to be anything above a whisper. "...I am sorry, prince...I never wished that upon you. This shouldn't have happened but Askeladd is..."

You gritted your teeth. Askeladd was many things...and he seemed to not have an ounce of...care in his heart for his band.

Why are you surprised? The man, the killer and kidnapper of royalty...the leader of a band so vile. Yet it still hurt to be here.

Hearing something shift behind you, though you were still lost in your own, useless thoughts.

"Why...are you out of all people apologizing?"

The grave tone in his question made you snap your eyes to him.

Canute's eyes, though red, seemed...cold and deep.

The evident frown on his face was now a scowl, however, one of slight confusion. Did he...always look like that?

For the first time, you hear him say your name.

"Why...are you out of all people not fighting?"

You startle as he so boldly took ahold of your shoulder. Before that, the prince barely could glance at you.

"You seem so rueful...yet you are one of them who brought me here. You took me hostage just like Askeladd, but you still provide me with your comfort."

Feeling yourself rise and back away from the young man, your eyes widened, mouth silent. Yet Canute did not let go.

"You provide me with your comfort, your pity, your blade and weapon. With your body as a shield yet only out of obligation. You shared your rations out of obligation when Ragnar was no more but still did so with a smile. Why?"

Canute finally seemed to frown.

"The day before...you have killed for one. You rose your blade to kill for Thorfinn and willingly tainted yourself with blood, with sin for his safety. The day after that you shared the warmth and laughter as if none of that happened."

"Prince..."

"You kill and attack everyone but each other...your kindness does not reach anyone but him. I must have simply been lucky...or did I seem so meek to you to lower your guard? For you to be so merciless and ruthless to bring the slightest bit if goodness to a man who is just as cruel...and now you are here demurred by all the unfairness of it all? Is that love?"

Startled like a deer, you shift back. Canute spoke in riddles to you...or, perhaps, the word 'love' did linger in the back of your mind from a time far before your viking era?

That is up to you - but it cannot be denied that this royal must have lost his mind.

"When you kill for each other, is that love? When you indulge in your jokes, is that love? Is it love that you two share while you spare the rest of the world none?"

"Is that a bond of love?"

Moving even further back meant facing Björn and while both men seemed unnerving right now, you'd rather face the perplexing Canute. Though you cannot give an answer to his riddles.

"Do you love Thorfinn? And does Thorfinn love you? I've been wondering that since I knew you two."

You look away. It is hard to say whether or not you spared love any thought since your time here in Askeladd's band. The man and the rest of these vile creatures did not seem to know any love. Not Björn who was killing his own comrades, nor any of the men below the hills that were indulging in the art of battle and its entertainment.

Yet did you know any love?

Did you know love when graced by the shines of the sun? Did you love the feeling of winter, even as it tried to freeze you to death in the darkest of nights? Did you show any love to the critters you've killed for food? Did you know love when greeted by Thorfinn and his many snarky remarks? If so, did you love him from the beginning, when he was his cold, stark self or did you gift him any now, now that you know you could trust him?

Trust him now, even after he left you here to fight for the killer of his father?

It is strange.

It is strange as Canute discussed with the priest. As he compared the love of Ragnar and that of Thorfinn - to which the young prince took offense to.

"Both of them are discriminating. They prefer parts of the world over another. Your Ragnar preferred you over a village, and the young viking seemed to not hold any love for anything but this one." He pointed at you.

It is vile. It is discriminating, their love. They do not love all as they should. Perhaps they couldn't.

And so, the priest pointed at you again; "And this one is no different. You know love and you discriminate. You kill and steal and now drown in the consequences of your lacking love. You showed it out of pity to His Higness, I presume...but it still holds nothing. Even you, as you hold the young viking boy dear to you, can only show unconditional love in your death."

You could only watch with wide eyes. Were they right? Were they wrong? Did they know love better than you did?

Did you even know what all of this meant?

Did you?

It did not seem so.

For you stared in awe at the sight before you - the meek Canute craddling the face of a wild beast, Björn, as he struggled to swing another final blow. Eyes watched intently as he lowered his bloodied fist and held him close to his heart. Embracing him like a mother - a brother - a kin - a hurting heart!

Shocked, you stumble up on your feet as Björn regained concsiousness of his dazed state. This weak royal calmed someone as bloodlusting and barbaric as Björn!

You barely could breath and so was the priest. Mumbling about a miracle as Canute ordered the rest of the surviving men to tend to his wounds - as if he was deserving of tenderness - and to ready a sleigh for him. For he was injured, and the injured needed treatment.

The men berated of the unfairness of it all. Of the rules of fighting and of the winners and the losers. One shall be graced with victory while the other shall suffer.

The prince turned to you, ordering you to help him gather the lost horses as well. Even now his touch was firm but gentle.

"I shall show you the meaning of your battles as well. Even your death if I must. For you still hold an inkling of love...I can offer you paradise on earth if you let it happen."

Feeling Like I'm Living In Your Shadow...

He lost conciousness for a good moment, he know he did...and even though it felt like an eternity, he reckoned he flew higher than the birds...

Even after Thorkell broke his arm, he was still standing. Standing there, tall and alive as he kept asking him the same question.

"Do you know what makes a true warrior?"

Is it the valkyries and their offering hand? The promise for Valhalla? Does one need to die with honor or simply have a high body count?

Thorkell admitted on hoping the son of the man stronger than him could answer the conundrum. But the young blonde was only lost.

Lost on how to kill him. Askeladd had promised to find a weak point but so far the giant bastard has yet to stumble and fall.

His daggers are tainted with his blood but no matter the many slices, Thorkell was not admitting defeat. He challenged him to a duel, he sliced his chain mail, got his arm broken and Askeladd is on the verge of bleeding out...

The cheers of the men around him was deafening, too.

As it felt like an eternity to this fight, Thorfinn did not even notice that he wasn't thinking about anything but Askeladd.

Thorkell promised him tales of his father, who he apparently knew, but even thinking about Thors would only make him lose focus.

He couldn't afford to think about his father right now. Not about his mother or sister, Askeladd or you.

He could only listen to the hollers, the wind, Throkell's steps and the words of wisdom leaving Askeladd's mouth...

"Y'know, it almost seemed like Thors did love my niece Helga..."

Thorfinn backed away from a swing of his axe.

"So is love what makes a true warrior? Ah, no...couldn't be it, now could it?"

Thorfinn blocked it all out. Focus on the axes. Cut through the ankles and biceps. Win and you'll be fine.

And so he seemed to be. Blinded briefly by the reflection of Askeladd's blade and hit in the head, Thorkell fell into the snow. With a bellow, Thorfinn casted aside his shock and went for the eye.

He can win this. He'll win Askeladd back and kill him in a duel himself. He'll win, he'll win!

Whatever else may happen after that does not matter.

And so he won.

Enough not to have him and Askeladd be slaughtered by the others and having escaped with a mere scar and broken arm.

Canute descended the hill and with him, a small army of Thorkell's men. To his right were you, riding close by with a frown that could frighten the men. Thorkell watched the prince's bravery and equal foolishness. His lack of fear irritated the viking but he still believed it to be better to become his vassal instead of being his kidnapper.

You got off to tend to Björn, fastened at the sleigh, just like Canute ordered. As Thorkell's band followed the young royal with perplexed faces, Thorfinn tagged along before his eyes widened at the sight of you.

Running up to you, the calmness that overtook him due to his victory ceased and he almost panted like a dog as he finally reached you. One arm in a sling while the other hovered above yours - almost wanting to grab hold of it.

"You alright?" He panted out as his eyes looked you up and down - and so did yours.

The young fella was truly worn out. Even though he was lucky his arm had only been broken, bruises are surely soon to follow. You couldn't see any blood, blood that wasn't his at least, but it was clear that him even being able to stand could be considered a miracle.

The idiot gambled with another round with Thorkell the Tall, after all. It is a miracle he was alive.

"I am." You responded in a whisper, looking away with a frown. Without another word, you followed Canute.

I Know No One's There, I'll Stay, I'll Stay...

Thorfinn trotted after you like a confused child.

While staying close to the prince, the young viking talked to you mundanely as if nothing had happened. The tales that Thorkell told him - who was strolling alongside Askeladd with a tune - and how he knew about his father. About his mother and the many battles Thors had fought, and how he suddenly seemed to give it all up.

He told you how he now seemed to become a vassal for the princess, as if you had not witnessed it. Thorkell the Tall now following orders from soft Canute out of all people. The same man who almost made mincemeat out of the both of you.

Now there he was, strolling along with his eyepatch.

"What's the matter with you?" Thorfinn rose a brow.

You glanced to him. Arm tightly in a sling as if hugging himself, though his bored gaze made it clear that he was anything but concerned for his own safety. He had talked and talked ever since you met up again but not once did he ask you about your experience up the hill.

It was irrelevant to him. As long as you weren't beaten or bruised or killed, any kind of incident did not matter to him.

He did not even ask if you needed to fight for your survival. If you had to kill any previous bandmates - they did not matter though you could understand from where he came from with that logic.

They did not matter.

No one is left anyway. Eradicated either by Thorkell's, Askeladd's or Thorfinn's hand. Whether or not you helped out with getting rid of the vermin did not matter in the end.

None of that...was love, was it?

"Nothing." You curtly responded and focused on guiding the horses.

You cannot believe how much of an errand boy he was playing.

The meeting with the king was intimidating enough - you thought your good intentions to Canute would grand you to be on the good side of the king but he was keen on assanitating his own child. Canute seemed well aware and, with Askeladd by his side now, planning to kill his father himself.

It was intimidating. The meek, fair princess now plotting murder. He was so small to you, a frail bird too scared to fly - now he intended to conquer the sky.

You wished you weren't there. But as Canute introduced you as his guardian, you didn't really have a choice in this matter.

If you are female, well, having you there might do more harm then good. King Sweyn questioning his son's sanity on putting his life in the hands of a woman.

Still, what is done is done, and Thorfinn played along nicely. Both you and Askeladd could see that. The young man was training despite his broken arm, made a self-made sling or what you assumed to be support as he stabbed through the air.

The evening was cold but not refreshing to you. Spending the night in the barn next to the inn, where everyone merrily ate and celebrated the prince's safe return, you strolled along the house as if lost in a forest.

The inn was warm but unwelcome, even if Canute was in there. He ordered food to be prepared for you and Thorfinn but you'd rather wait outside than go in (Again, as a woman going in might be a bad idea).

The door opened and you watched Askeladd carefreely taking a piss on the snow. He grinned at you. "Not going to come in, into the warmth? The food is good."

You declined, saying that food would be prepared for you. The older man clicked his tongue as he shook his head. Pride is going to freeze you to death. Just look at all the men he lost.

"Only you and Thorfinn remain, oh, and Björn, too. What are you going to do after all this, eh, kid? I wouldn't call you loyal to me."

Scoffing, you turned away. Perhaps you did have a plan. Wanting to run away to a far-away place, start your own viking band or stay as Canute's guardian. Or maybe, you were as clueless as Askeladd made you out to be. Wandering like a lost child.

"Are you just gonna keep following Thorfinn like a pup? Or maybe he'll keep on clinging to you after he got his revenge."

You turn to him with a glare. Askeladd truly was an enigma of a man...does he hate you just as much as he hated his other bandmates? Why does he keep having you around when Thorfinn is a much better tool? Even now he does what he says in order to get a duel. And why would Canute, the one who spoke of love to you, recruit a cruel man like Askeladd?

You couldnt find any answers that night. Thorfinn kept on stabbing through the air, only the aroma of food making him stop. He gobbled it all up and you kept on pointing out the scraps of food stuck on his lips. Watching him eat, you absent-mindedly called his name.

"...Why do you keep me around, Thorfinn?"

The blonde let out a confused noise. You took a scrap of meat off his cheek before eating it yourself.

"Why would you ask that?" He kept on stuffing his mouth. Truly, why? He was the one who asked you that question many months before, he was the one confused by your behavior and actions. Yet here you are putting his into question?

"I don't want you to die." Though he kept on eating, his eyes stayed downcast and his voice barely above a whisper. Still, that was enough of an answer to him. It had been before. But you did not seemed satisfied by it.

"It's just strange." You mumbled and inhaled sharply to gather your words, "Thorfinn, do you-"

You halt, then hesitated. There was furstration in your eyes that even he could make out.

Was his wish for your survival his gracing of love?

Then why did he not love when surrounded by the sea, by land, animals and food?

Why did you gift love to the one companion to when he aims to murder out of honor?

Sighing, you sat back and leaned against his shoulder. Swallowing the last crumbles, Thorfinn wrapped you in a blanket as best as he could with one arm.

"Take this. It gets freezing cold here at night."

"...Why is my friend such a fool?"

You whispered and Thorfinn let out an offended 'huh'? He flicked your cheek before making himself comfortable. "You're acting so strange."

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childrenofandromeda · 1 year

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Major powers of the Andromeda Galaxy, Part 1: The Xana Arm Federation

This post is a brief overview of the species of the Xana Arm Federation.

The Xana Arm of Andromeda is home to 6 major sapient species, whose planets have formed the Xana Arm Federation. These species are Parallans, Celestans, Lolai, Valians, Valikin, and Tsanans. The Xana Arm confederation was established in 2018 CE. Membership in the HAF is fully voluntary, on a per-system basis. As of January 2023 CE, there are 6,442 member systems.

Interstellar trade is done through Xana Credits, which are almost always handled electronically, but "coins" in the form of small cylinders, colored to show their value, exist for small transactions.

Tsanans (tsawhe)

Tsanans are a humanoid race, native to the moon K'aazipelh of the planet Tsana in the Caset system. K'aazipelh is a superhabitable moon, being slightly larger than Earth with shallow oceans and a denser atmosphere. Tsanans were the first species in Andromeda to invent FTL travel via Subspace, nearly 5 million years ago. They explored inward along the Xana Arm during this time, controlling much of the core of the galaxy, including the galactic bar and the roots of both the Xana Arm and the Mehiti Arm. Tsanans even crossed the intergalactic void, having a small presence in the Milky Way. They studied humans as they evolved and their societies formed as well, interfering as little as possible. In 100 CE, however, Tsanans had to abandon the Milky Way due to a war with the Glian Mycelium, leaving little behind in the Sol system, however some planetary bases and orbiting ships were left behind in many other systems. The area around where the Tsanans built their first Intergalactic gateway, now known as the Galactic Backwaters, has a lot of abandoned Tsanan ships and bases scattered through it.

Having come to almost universally appreciate the stories that humans created for teaching about how mythology develops in society (information lost to them millennia before), many Tsanan families today continue to name their children after human gods and mythological figures. Tsanans have also mastered genetic manipulation, many having traits from animals like cat ears, bat wings, or bear claws. These traits are often shared within families, as a sign of their togetherness, and it is a big deal when Tsanans get their first gene edit, typically around age 15.

Parallans (palanal / ashal palanu)

Parallans are also humanoid, almost indistinguishable from Tsanans (sans gene mods) and humans. They are, however, taller than both on average, with some even reaching 7'10". Parallans are native to the planet Parallax (pala), in the Yakuin system. It has a worldwide archipelago, with the largest islands being approximately the size of Australia. The foliage of Parallax is violet rather than green, taking a rare approach for photosynthesis by absorbing only the peak wavelengths of light from Yakuin.

Parallan culture focuses on equality and learning in all stages of life. They have public scientific institutes, which (pending approval) any citizen of the Parallan Federation can use for independent research. The Parallan Federation also has many universities, at least one in every Parallan settlement.

Celestans (Selasyk)

Celestans are the only other sapient humanoid species native to Andromeda. They are native to the planet Celesta (Seleste) in the Yakuin system. Celesta and Parallax are neighbors in the Yakuin system, with Celesta being a bit farther from Yakuin. Celesta is covered almost entirely by a large forest, with many lakes and rivers dotted within. However, there is one large, almost star-shaped sea in the northern hemisphere.

Unlike their neighbors, Celestans are quite anatomically different from humans. They have larger, pointed ears, and some even have horns growing from their heads. Their biology is also changed by their planet, which has a lot of Ninai deposits. Ninai is a mineral only found in Andromeda which interacts with Vipris, a type of exotic matter which does not usually interact with normal matter. Celestans have Ninai in their blood and nervous systems, which allows them to manipulate Vipris to create magic-like effects. No species on any other planet has this adaptation naturally, but there are a few ways for other species to gain it, which is common among Parallans.

Lolai (Lolai)

Lolai are a group of many species native to Celesta that have been uplifted by proximity to the Ninai crystals in Celesta's crust. There are many species that this has happened to, but not all members of those species are affected. It is passed down from generation to generation, but both Lolai and Celestans have insisted on conserving the populations of their non-uplifted cousins.

Lolai and Celestans both have a connection to the wildlife of Celesta. The mycelium of Celestan fungi form a planet-wide network which allows communication among much of the planet's plant-life, which Celestans and Lolai have found ways to use as well. It acts as a sort of long-range telepathy, but it only works on Celesta, and doesn't have any mind-controlling properties like Glian Mycelium does.

Valians and Valikin (valinal / valinal yu)

Valians and Valikin are native to the rings of the planet Vali I in the Vali system. They are reptile-like species, who both biomineralize metals and ores as scales to protect from radiation. Valians are large and draconic, with large wing-like appendages which allow them to maneuver within the gasses in the rings of Vali I. Valikin are smaller, around human-size, and lack wings. They instead jump between the rocks that make up the ring, or rarely they are allowed to ride along on the backs of Valians.

Both Valians and Valikin are mute, despite the gas being thick enough for them to breathe properly and for other species to talk. Instead, they communicate through a few different systems. Close up or intimately, they both use a system which consists of holding hands or feet and vibrating and pulsing special muscles in their palms/soles. For communicating at a distance, Valikin use a combination of dance and sign language, and Valians use a kind of semaphore with their wings. That said, many of both species have learned Parallan Sign Language as well, in order to communicate with other species, and some have learned to understand spoken language, though this is more difficult for them.

#worldbuilding #writing #writers on tumblr #science fantasy #sci fantasy #sci fi #childrenofandromeda #pala #coaparallax #seleste #coacelesta #tsana #vali #lolai

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shinjisdone · 4 months

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To Soften a Warrior’s Heart (Vinland Saga; Thorfinn; Part 9)

In which you have joined Askeladd’s band…and grow closer to the Son of Thors. Though it is more difficult than anyone can could ever imagine…

[Headcanons of how it would be like to meet and crawl your way into Thorfinn’s heart (based on season 1; both platonic and romantic)]

Part 1 is here - meeting Thorfinn at the age of 14 and how he is at that age

Part 2 is here - meeting Thorfinn at the age of 16/17 + headcanons of growing closer (slightly following s1 story)

Part 3 is here - blooming friendship with Thorfinn (slightly following s1 story)

Part 4 is here - Thorfinn unwittingly opening his heart as he realizes he does not want you to die

Part 5.1 is here - sweet things Thorfinn would do for you (headcanons)

Part 5.2 is here - other sweet things Thorfinn would do for you (headcanons)

Part 6 is here - meeting Canute and becoming his guard - Thorfinn accepts your relationship and bond

Part 7 is here - Canute grieving over Ragnar and Thorkell catching up; Thorfinn leaves you alone for revenge

Part 8 is here - Thorfinn wins against Thorkell; Questioning your bond with Thorfinn

Part 10 is here - Thorfinn and you bound by heart; Promises of Vinland broken and abandoned

Tag list:

@luopenis , @jinsecho , @mitsureigen , @theknightssecrets

Mentions of murder, death, war, slave trade, harrasment against women and whatever awful things happened in the viking era. Only mentioned and used as examples. Mostly gender-neutral examples but female-leaning ones are there, too.]

[This part will specifically mention: Slave woman purchased just to be killed, meeting with Leif, Thorfinn not giving a sht about Leif :( , and you are like??? bro that is LOVE, he loves you!!!!, THORFINN U IDIOT, Askeladd and Thorfinn dueling, Askeladd snapping, lots of plot-driven dialouge, Askeladd spittin facts, lost Thorfinn]

No, I Don't Want It, I Don't Want It, I Don't Want It...

No more was this a viking band - the majority has been killed by their own leader.

This was now the newest vessel of the youngest prince of Denmark. Leading of what remained of the men with Askeladd being his right-hand man.

Sailing along with all the tricks in the book that he had, all of which he had learned in his life felt like it was meant for a moment like this, for a future king like Canute.

And you had no choice but to go along with it if you wanted to keep on living.

Askeladd seemed more alive than ever. Youthful even as he grinned and spoke and chatted with Thorkell and Canute as if he had been waiting all his life for an opportunity like this. You and Thorfinn had never seen him this upbeat before, unless he was with Björn.

The man in question was still on a mat, resting though.

So in his usual fashion, the older man confidently stood on the boat with his typical shit-eating grin while crossing his arms. He spoke with carefreeness to the prince as they neared a dock in York. Left and right a crowd congegrated at the incoming ship, whispering among themselves on the return of prince Canute.

Yet as loud as their curioustiy was, deadly silent was the arrow that pierced the vulnerable chest almost precisely.

A thud ensued and a scream from your direction caused a commotion from the docks. The ship hurried to land and brought the wounded royal quickly to aid. While few ran over to him, another hurried away from the scene.

Clothes were ripped apart as someone abruptly stopped from taking out the arrow. The weapon was deep but what truly caused many to gasp and back away, was Canute himself approaching the dying woman.

You watched with a glare of anger (or perhaps pity? Indifference? Shock? Disgust?) as Askeladd casually trailed after Canute while letting out the obvious elephant in the room that someone apparently wanted him killed.

The leader made sure to purchase a slave with a form and stature similiar to the prince to act as bait. He ordered you to cause a commotion on land to have the culprit panic and escape from the scene - and then have Thorfinn silently get rid off him. To show the assasins that Askeladd is well aware of their presence and capable of taking them all out.

He has his tools for it, after all.

"Play the dumb but genuine witness," He grinned as he pointed at you before shooing you and Thorfinn out of his sight. Do your part and you'd all safely arrive at York. For now.

The perpetrator was cut down and the commotion that was supposed to bring the attention on the dying woman unfortunately was also brought to Thorfinn.

Still with his arm in a sling, he found himself surrounded by a few guards who also shadowed the culprit but put the blame on the young blonde instead. You hurried to him but even so, your own acting wasn't really able to save him.

"As if!" One pointed out, "You're just a kid, just like him! Obviously you two are in this together so you are trying to save his skin!"

"I told you, it wasn't me. It was him, he had the corssbow in hand."

Still, the guards were not relenting, drawing their swords at the two of you. Behind them was a much smaller man who called out, though his voice was way too meek compared to the spitting insults of the guards.

One insult too many and one step too close to you, and Thorfinn took one out with a single biff. As intimidating as the men seemed, they quickly turned tail and ran off at the sight of his two daggers.

"Thorfinn Karlsefni!"

The young lad who took Thorkell down with just two knifes - gossip turned real at the sight of the beaten blonde.

The scene clearing out so fast left you a bit relieved - perhaps speechless even. Would tension like this cease so quickly in the future too, whenever the name 'Karlsefni' was uttered?

Still, one stayed - the little man in the corner you had noticed. His green tunic was well kept for someone his age, short with half of his light hair already gone on his head. With his moustache spikey but kept short as well as his shining but wide eyes, you doubted this old geezer could pose as a threat.

"...Thorfinn...?" He muttered in a horse voice, "Thorfinn...Son of Thors? Are you the son of Thors?" With each word, he gingerly approached. You watched as Thorfinn merely rose a brow before his own eyes widened.

"...Uncle Leif?"

You watched with bated breath.

The hand on your weapon had long ceased shaking and resting upon it yet still; It was balled into a fist at your side.

Your eyes darted between the two men and their exchange of the past. With your back to the wall behind you and Thorfinn resting on the edge of the dock as this 'Leif' never seemed to stop talking about Thors.

About Iceland.

About family. An 'Helga' and an 'Ylva'.

"That does not concern me." Thorfinn uttered as he got up and adjusted his arm sling, "I am asking you about Vinland. Father wanted to go there and I want to know if you did anything about it."

"But Thorfinn," Leif stepped closer, his arms open as his eyes threatened to tear up again, "You don't need to be here. You want your revenge but what about your mother? She's been getting worse and worse ever since you got taken from us. Ylva has been worried sick as well, you could go back and see them. I'm sure Helga will feel better-!"

"I said that doesn't concern me!"

Swiftly the blonde spun back with dagger in his good hand. His face had quickly contorted into sheer rage once again. "I'm here to take my revenge! Nothing else!"

Seeming to lose air, Leif sobbed as his voice shook. "It's been enough! We've lost you since you were six, Thorfinn, six! You have been in this hell long enough, we can go back home! Go back to Iceland!"

You could feel it. Feel the familiar ire ooze out of Thorfinn. A hatred unrivaled and unequalled in a way you have never seen nor felt in your young years.

"Enough?" His tone was akin to a growl, like a switch.

"It will never be enough! Have you not seen it, how Father died?! As long as this damn bastard is eating, breathing and shitting, it'll never be enough! You hear me?!"

He tried to take a deep breath and in the next moment, grasped your hand and marched back to the boat with you in tow. His grip was tight enough to hurt you. Yet that was the least of your concerns.

Looking back, you could see the man tear up.

"I'll stay...I'll stay right here until you change your mind!"

Never have you heard of such absurdity before.

"I won't give you up, Thorfinn!"

A man from the past - a mere, old, harmless merchant - insisting on bringing someone back home, someone like Thorfinn. To have looked and searched for him. Embracing him tight like a son and weeping at the sight of him. Alive and safe.

"Let's go back home! Please!"

Such bravery, such determination for someone like Thorfinn. That is love, is it not?

You'd certainly feel loved if someone like that was searching for you.

"Let's go back to Iceland!"

I Don't Want It But I Know No One's There...

The day is quick to be over and morning approaches yet again.

Today at noon is the meeting with the king and all his investors and allies. Askeladd insisted on being there as well but you couldn't care enough about the details of high and mighty masteries.

About spying, about rumors, about hired assassins and slaves only to get rid of them...

You would love to say that Thorfinn shares your sentiment and he does but still approves on playing a puppet while you stay rigid and firm on the stage. Not moving.

You simply had watched. Watched as bands fought over a prince, watched as he tamed them like beasts, watched along as the band was reduced to mere three people that serve a royal now. Watched as Thorfinn continued to play along and along and along...

He was as focused as ever today. Today he insisted on getting his duel and revenge.

You sat still and watched. Perhaps a part of you adjusted his arm sling yet again. Out of kindness, out of pity, out of fear, anger, exhaustion...

You just didn't want him to die.

Gods, would it be awful. Would it be foolish if he were to die now.

Though it was noon, the sky was dark. Clouds forebode a storm or blizzard and Askeladd complained about the awful timing. How it had to be so close to the meeting...that two stubborn idiots insisted on dueling him now.

You went up the hill, next to Canute and Thorkell. Both of them said nothing as you invited yourself to their company.

Thorkell, who almost crushed you. Your shorter, younger body that of an insect compared to him, as well as in his eyes.

Canute, who was too bashful to glance at you. Someone who grieved and cried while clinging on your sleeve now seemed like a different, stronger person than you.

And the second dour fool...Björn crawled up the snowy path with nothing but a sword and his wound. He needed to go first and Thorfinn seemed to grant him that wish, watching from the sidelines.

Though the duel was quickly over. So fast and one-sided that it could barely be called a match, let alone a battle. Even as Askeladd held a sliver of shine and love in his eyes as Björn died in his arms, as he confessed his wish and reciprocated it with his own...as he gave him the final but merciful blow to send him to Valhalla...none could find it in their hearts to really feel anything for the old man anymore.

"...Awfully sorry to have kept you waiting, lad." He threw the blood off his sword with a clean swing after he covered the body.

While walking over to Thorfinn almost like in a trance, your eyes never left the snow sullied in blood nor the body growing ever so cold or the sword in Askeladd's hand.

"I shall be witness to this duel and as the prince here, I shall also be the one to decide when it ends." Canute spoke in a loud tone, it was hard to believe he only used to mumble. You didn't look back but felt thankful that he went out of his way to ensure Thorfinn's safety.

Even if that meant not satisfying him and his lust for vengeance.

And here you were in front of Thorfinn, yet again tugging and adjusting his arm sling - which he had also wrapped his dagger around, refusing to have it any other way while dueling the older man - to make sure it stayed put and firm. Firm enough to not have the weapon fall out of its grip and to not have the stubborn fool injure his arm more than needed.

He watched silently, his glare the moment he laid eyes on Askeladd today not yielding. Not softening at the sight of you as they ususally do.

Wordlessly you tug and tie and press the dagger deeper into the grip. Though your work is done, and even needless to an extent, your cold hands stayed on the sling. Cold, bare hands red from the chilling winter day. Hands that have seen and caused chaos gingerly carressed the sling and bandages alongside the blade. Your eyes never left it and neither did Thorfinn's.

No one commented a thing. All waited patiently for both men to begin.

Slowly, ever so slowly and reluctantly, your hands glided down his sling and swung back to your sides. Finally, you looked back at him and stared into his hardened eyes with your softened ones.

"...Don't die. Please..." Was all you could muster after an enduring silence. Thorfinn only left you there as he went up to Askeladd.

The sword is thrown into the snow.

Daggers in both hands, one broken.

Still, as he stood there, ready and unarmed with his neck so delicate and vulnerable, Thorfinn got pummeled nicely; One fist after another as he was headbutted, kicked, uppercutted, held by his hair and biffed until his face was red, blue and black. It was hard to watch.

Thorkell and Canute chatted about bets and strength. The giant of a man teasing you even for probably being the type to bet it all on your loyal friend and buddy Thorfinn even as he is getting the daylights beaten out of him. You refused to talk to him.

You never uttered a word during the duel nor to the other two, yet Canute could easily tell how tense you were with each punch Askeladd threw at Thorfinn. You were just watching with bated breath and a racing heart.

Even though this one-sided brawl was easily, so, so easily in Askeladd's favor, the leader grew more and more frustrated with each swing.

A fool. An idiot. Stubborn and small-minded, braying like a blind animal and lashing out in the most childish way he has ever seen. A real warrior.

How he wished he'd just get into his thick skull, use a bit of his brain! Just a damn bit for once, that complete moron!

Yet as he kicked him for one last time, having the young man fall head-first into the snow, knocked out cold, he rose his sword over his head, only to quickly raise his other arm the moment he heard stomping through the snow.

Canute had called out to you as you rushed towards the man with your own blade - cutting into his hand as he stopped the weapon from piercing through his chest.

Your glare was as dark as thunder and so akin to Thorfinn's. It made him laugh and just as frustrated.

"Calm down now. I didn't even harm a hair on his head." Askeladd gestured to tip of his sword dug into the snow, right next to Thorfinn's head. Swiftly, the man grabbed your own blade, pushing you away with a shove and shaking the blood off his palm. He eyed you with a matching scowl. "Don't get worked up over an fool like him. He'd just cause you trouble."

You paid no attention to his words. Throwing your weapon aside, you were fast as a storm, kneeling by Thorfinn's side and turning him around, holding him in your arms.

"Thorfinn! Thorfinn!" As you attempted to waken him, Canute followed close behind you, yelling out that the duel was over. Askeladd did not reply but instead, took a seat on a few bricks of an abandonded bridge. With a scoff he watched the young blonde regain conciousness but even as he awoke in your arms, the simpleton just jumped to his feet despite his injuries and whipped his head around in search for his prey.

Even as Canute explained the outcome and even as your hands and arms supported him like a mother, as Thorfinn looked dumbfounded at your hurt gaze at the sight of his blue, bloodied and pummeled face...he was still looking for Askeladd.

His blue eyes watched as you tried to wipe the blood off his nose, at the mere graze of your touch had the young viking jump in pain. It must hurt so much to see him make a fool of himself time and time again. Nevertheless, he keeps on crawling back to Askeladd and it sickened him.

For the first time in a long while, Askeladd called out your name in a calm and placid manner.

"Don't waste your enegry on an moron like him. He keeps on getting these injuries because of his own stupidity...you're better off without him."

At that Thorfinn let out an offended groan - Askeladd gestured to his outburst with an unimpressed sneer. "As I said. The idiot brays, then takes out his weapons and thinks himself the hunter as he charges head on while going for my neck. He thinks he's already won...by just roaring out a little victory chant and throwing himself into battle, just like all these self-proclaimed warriors do. They've all lost sight of the nice things in battling."

"Björn was right...I hate all warriors like that. Bastards that take, rampage, pillage, kill and then rob an entire culture of all that they had. Especially those Nordics...those vikings." Taking a deep breath, he called out calmly once again. "Laddie. Let me tell you...how to really murder an abhorrent bastard."

Don't Let Me Go, I Have Nothing Left To Lose...

His eyes never left him. Nor you.

The tale was as old as time for him, funny even in a way. A past that shaped him and all his actions he has done and will ever do but simply reciting it all brought a few chuckles out of him from the memories. The treatment. His mother and her belief of an returning king. The never-ending mountains of ash. The fools of half-brothers he used to have. All the wealth from the murder. The soft 'Why?' as his father met his end.

He didn't even think he'd remember that much!

But it all did happen...he remembered the respect he earned and how he dug her grave in Wales. It is all still there, he hoped.

The kid knew how to kill him now...he wondered if he would actually suceed after hearing his advice.

"So you know now, Thorfinn if you listened to me of course. I've managed to kill my most hated enemy within two years and still here I stand about ten later. Use your wits for next time, you damn numbskull." The man had long stood up and marched over to Björn's cold body. He threw one brief glance over his shoulder to Thorfinn - who was simply fuming in his own blood.

"Shut it!" He got up as briskly as he could from your arms, "Shut up, bastard! I'll, I'll kill you! Until my final breath, I'll rip out your heart! I will definitely-!"

Another clang. The sword hit the snow, it's tip dug deep within the earth. With more fiersome intent than him feigning the final blow on Thorfinn. If you were not mistaken, you reckoned to hear the metal crack.

"Damn it all. You're really pissin' me off."

In an attempt to control his anger, Askeladd balled his shaking hand as he scowled like a wounded beast at Thorfinn. The latter was startled, you noted.

"...You talk about killing and killing and killing. Yet you haven't achieved a single thing. Look at you, lad. You're covered in blood, snot and saliva, it's disgusting. You had so many, so many chances to kill and gut me yet you never used your damn brain for any of them! Look at you!"

With a sudden shout he pointed at him. You and Canute could not help but jump in fright. "You're quick, you're strong, you're talented! I can't deny that...and still you insist on going off on your emotions and losing each little duel you so wholeheartedly persist on! Keeping on losing your cool and brainlessly charging forward. You had so many chances, Thorfinn, and you had equally as much chances to get killed for your brainless behaviour if it weren't for them!" His digit went to point at you. Your breath got caught in your throat.

"If it weren't for the only damn friend you got in this messed up world, you'd be long dead! You owe them more than I owe you! And still...they're gonna end up being the death of you, too."

With a sharp gasp, Thorfinn once again swung his dagger at him. However, he struggled to catch his breath. "Don't bring them into this! This, this is between you and me! It always has been!"

"Don't be laughable, boy!" Askeladd bellowed at him, "It always has been until they arrived! Little dog that you are, you clung onto their hip since then and today as well! Your little attachment will get you killed, fool!"

Oh, how long Askeladd had waited to say that straight to his face! Thorfinn's attachment to you will end up killing him! And what good does that bring when a corpse can't avenge his father?

You watch with a darting, wide gaze between the men. Thorfinn kept denying it, throwing his tantrum with the same threats as before - the same threats he has been spitting his way since he was six years old - only for Askeladd to point out every. Single. Thing. He has ever done for you, sacrificed for you and only you. For your survival. For your honor. Everything. He can't fool him, boy.

"It all started with your absurd, small 'trades'. Yes, I've seen it as you threw them that bunny as amends. I've noticed you bringing in the horses, fix your gear together, having each other's back on the battlefield as you barely even acknowledged our existence. You think I haven't been paying attenton aside from our duels?"

He saw it in the early dawn of spring when you hunt and Thorfinn shared his prey with you. He witnessed it in the deadly cold night of winter when you are huddled and cuddled close together. He saw it when Thorfinn's dear dagger is in your hands as if it was nothing and the lad doesn't see anything wrong with it. Damn it, he sees it in his smile! He smiles when near you, at you and is brought only by you!

Boy, you are laughable!

"And when I told you to go fetch His Highness from Thorkell's men in an exchange for a chance to kill me, you just had to turn around and save their skin. You are as predictable as I thought, Thorfinn." Askeladd couldn't help but snicker, "I've given you so many chances and you all threw them away the moment your little friend just seemed to be in danger. You can't even focus on your goal, idiot, you kept on prioritizing a life that won't help you achieve it. Maybe if they'd never joined, you would have long gotten your revenge."

Askeladd calmed down enough to grin and jest, "But no," He feigned disappointment and shook his head, "You still refuse to have a bit of your wits about you. When I threaten your friend's life, you throw yourself in front of them. When I tell you to fight Thorkell the Tall, you do so only to be the one to chop off my head. And now...you are here. And so am I. Really, you've helped me along the way, Thorfinn...you've been an useful tool."

The young viking stepped back with a choked breath and a gut-wreching hole in his stomach that seemed to take his heavy heart.

"You're like a dog chasing after food. I should be thankful to Thors."

Everything seemed grow hazy around. The cold, the figures talking away, the ground underneath him. The air seemed more piercing with every breath he so depserately struggled to fill his lungs with, fill it to live but that seemed like a task too great for him. Pain shot through his broken arm and his legs gave out as the snow softened his fall. Everything dislimned before him as if all this never happened at all.

You caught him before he could fall into the snow and suffocate. His body freezing and heavy against you. The second dagger slipped out of his hand.

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shinjisdone · 1 year

Text

To Soften a Warrior’s Heart (Vinland Saga; Thorfinn; Part 4)

In which you have joined Askeladd’s band…and grow closer to the Son of Thors. Though it is more difficult than anyone can could ever imagine…

[Headcanons of how it would be like to meet and crawl your way into Thorfinn’s heart (based on season 1; both platonic and romantic)]

Part 1 is here - meeting Thorfinn at the age of 14 and how he is at that age

Part 2 is here - meeting Thorfinn at the age of 16/17 + headcanons of growing closer (slightly following s1 story)

Part 3 is here - blooming friendship with Thorfinn (slightly following s1 story)

Part 5.1 is here - sweet things Thorfinn would do for you (headcanons)

Part 5.2 is here - other seet things Thorfinn would do for you (headcanons)

Part 6 is here - Becoming Canute's guard while Thorfinn accepts your relationship and bond

Part 7 is here - Canute grieving over Ragnar and Thorkell catching up; Thorfinn leaves you alone for revenge

Part 8 is here - Thorfinn wins against Thorkell; Questioning your bond with Thorfinn

Part 9 is here - Meeting Leif and Thorfinn dueling Askeladd; Losing while Askeladd told him the truth of his constant losses

Part 10 is here - Thorfinn and you bound by heart; Promises of Vinland broken and abandoned

[This part will specifically mention: Attempted murder (at you), protective Thorfinn (slightly injured, you'll be okay though), and small headcanons of the aftermath (Thorfinn imagining what would happen if you did die).]

Anyone, Everyone I will Crush Them All...

Thorfinn felt even better in the morning. You were being so considerate to him after last night, at least in a way to not make it obvious to the other bandmates.

But Askeladd wasnt like the others...man got a brain inside that skull.

You stuck by Thorfinn, often glimpsed at him to check on his well-being, talked when something was directed at the both of you.

And if that change wasn't obvious enough, then sharing the same camp, food and pain certainly was. It was interesting to watch this flower bloom.

Anything that touched ones heart can be a drive and a weakness at the same time.

It was only a matter of time. The prince was within arm's reach, just behind the smoke of the wildfire and Thorkell's army.

Thorfinn is truly perfect. Stubborn and foolish, he follows every command as long as he can duel Askeladd in return. Without any hesitation, he buckles up on his horse, lets himself be soaked in water and storm blindly into the enemie's territory all alone. What a perfect tool.

And what a sweet, sweet and perfect opportunity this is.

Askeladd stands on a higher point at the outskirts to 'get a better look at things', he claims. The man stands behind you, tall with his hands on his hips as he watches Thorfinn, with the latter glaring at him in return.

Good.

One hand slides down to the hilt of his sword before raising it. Tilting it to the side, he aimed for your neck.

Thorfinn's eyes widened while you stayed ignorant of what's to come.

The horse brayed in pain as the blonde almost snapped the rein back, pulling towards him and steering it back. Watching Thorfinn's face twist into one of rage, you turned around to see Askeladd's blade coming down for your neck.

With a scream, you stumble as you are yanked back and Askeladd withdrew his sword before the young man could harm him. Thorfinn lets go of your collar as he stands between you and the man.

"What the hell is the meaning of this?!"

More questions are thrown but Askeladd stays unnervingly calm. He clicks his tongue and waves his finger down to the massacre below. Thorfinn should better hurry up.

Seething with his nosetrills flared up and teeth gritted, he snapped his eyes between him and the battle, back to back. Unintelligable grunts leave him and he grabbed your arm (or a fistful of your collar) and hoisted you up with him on his horse - desperately quickly, rough and without explanation.

Your weapon almost slipped out of your hand, feeling too distraught to really focus and the many battle cries around you didn't help.

In fact, you were no help at all. Thorfinn trampled down men that stood in his way and dragged you off it with him as he stood defensively in front of the prince and his soldiers. One hand tilted his dagger upward so he wouldn't scrape you as he once again yanked you behind him.

He is not going to leave you alone with...that senile, old bastard!

What the hell even was that?!

Trying to kill your own bandmate - no, you weren't part of these brutes, you were just following orders for your own benefit but never did you do anything that deserves to have your head chopped off! What was that supposed to be?! How is this of any help?!

He may have hauled you right into the battlefield, in the eye of the storm, in the smoke where out of all people, Thorkell is waiting...but you are safer here.

You are safer with him.

Thank goodness that for whatever reason Thorkell the Tall did not want to fight. His reasonings made no sense nor did you want to understand a monster like him as long as you did not need to battle him...you couldnt deny your relieve despite the stressful ordeal.

The prince seemed unharmed but Thorfinn couldn't care less. He was half-heartedly listening to the retainer and Askeladd (while biting bis tongue on what the hell he did right before the battle) as he kept on glancing to you - until the glances turned to straight up holding onto your shoulders as you were the one harmed. It may have happened due to Askeladd's trick or during the battle or maybe even Thorfinn himself inadvertently hurt you. It's hard to tell after the storm passed but your injury remained.

Thorfinn WILL say something. He would have no qualms about interrupting Askeladd's deal of protecting the prince right then and there or he might say something after that first. Maybe the both of you are on the boat at the back - like you usually are - but instead of talking or joking, you're clinging to your side. It isn't fatal but the fact that it happened through such circumstances is what's getting to the blonde.

"ASKELADD!!!" A ear-piercing scream made the prince and his soldiers jump while said person barely turned around. You're sitting, laying, enduring the pain at the back of the boat as Thorfinn was hunched by your side with his hands balled into fists, teeth gritting. The older man hasn't seen him so angry in years.

"What was the point of that?!" Thorfinn would yell out while Askeladd wouldn't even reply. A mere shoulder shrug or, if he feels like it, an excuse of 'You saw that wrong' or 'My hand slipped' would be all he'd get.

This would anger him more.

No, it's just not 'anger'. The pounding fear he felt when you were just about to be beheaded rooted itself in his heart and irrational fury was born from it. The blonde is confused and scared. Nothing that the leader did made any sense and...he was endangering you. The only thing clear in his mind is that this bastard tried to kill you!

Askeladd tried to kill you! The murderer of his father tried to kill you!

There was no turning back now. Even as empty-headed as the other men are, they notice the harsh shift in the boy's behavior and attempt to calm him down - some are at least, the other (still very oblivious) ones keep asking what the hell the kid's so getting worked up for. You're still alive and it isn't fatal. Give the wound a few days rest and it'll turn into a nice scar.

It's even more troublesome when the band doesn't even know why he's so upset. Due to the smoke and their high trust in Askeladd's leadership, none would think he would ever attempt to kill one of his bandmates (hee hee, if only they knew).

'C'mon, lad, don't be like that', 'You're making a ruckus, we just got the prince', they'd say and if any of them dared to approach with open palms, Thorfinn would be quick to draw out his dagger and throw it at the closest one.

"Don't you dare go near them!"

The men grow uneasy but decide to let you two be. Askeladd hides his little smirk while the prince is wondering what he got into and if it was really worth it.

Thorfinn is too distraught, too furious and too emotional to notice his care for you but his actions made it crystal-clear to everyone. None of the danish soldiers thought that vikings would care so much for each other, especially such young ones.

Not like he can afford to ponder about that now. You're hurt and he needs to patch you up somehow - which he does, poorly so as it is evident from his own scarred body. He isn't quite good at taking care of himself, let alone someone else (he realizes he needs to learn it).

Would let none and I mean, none go near you to tend to you. Thorfinn is just decent at taking care of wounds, only enough to not die from them. Even if it were someone as honest as Björn or a danish doctor on board with the prince, he wouldn't let them. Not after that stunt from Askeladd. Thorfinn's distrust blossomed anew.

No. He will take care of you himself.

During the trip the blonde is hostile if he has to interact with anyone. His entire attention is on you even after he patched up, even if you told him you're fine.

Thorfinn can try as he may but if he were to deny his overprotectiveness of you, no one would believe him. Though, he is being too irrational at the moment that no one wants to talk to him anyway, including you.

If you are distraught yourself, the both of you are quiet but close with Thorfinn keeping his eye on you. He'd do the same if you were angry yourself.

If there is just a hint of sadness or even a tear leaking from your eye (but not falling. You swiftly wipe it off, you can't afford to cry here among vikings. Either it's only going to make you feel worse or you will lose all respect and reputation of the band), Thorfinn would absolutely be pissed. He isn't even thinking of shushing you for crying but instead his anger at Askeladd would only grow. It can't be described.

The son of Thors can't think straight. Everything was going fine until for some reason Askeladd, that bastard, that murderer, was...thinking of beheading you. Why? Why? What was the point of that?

It makes no sense. What's the point in killing someone like you? And the man just looked at him, leered at him with that damned smirk, toying with him, toying with you and now is just sitting there, having captured the prince and...!

He keeps on getting away with this.

First his father...now you.

No. No, he won't.

Thorfinn doesn't realize it. He won't ever admit it to himself because he isn't aware of it, but he doesn't want you to die. Thorfinn didn't want you to die.

Just the thought of it...which he would repress whenever he could, is just...awful. Imagining your body dismembered on the battlefield like the thousands of men he killed is an awful thought to have. That's all he knows.

The young man is hostile through and through. All of this happened in the span of a few hours and he is just expected to be over it?! To turn a blind eye because 'it didn't happen the way he thought' and that your injury isn't 'that bad. You probably were just careless'.

Oh, no. Fuck that.

The mercaneries were able to shake of Thorkell's army long enough to rest for a bit. Night came but that didn't mean they couldn't take their chances when it came to a monster like that. Let the prince rest and calm down and then keep on marching.

With you in tow Thorfinn made sure to stay far, far, far away from the other men, even preferring to sleep deep within a forest, as long as Askeladd can't spy on him with his ugly mug. He is too pissed off to really care about the other dangers lurking around.

Even if you started to feel better after the few hours, for the very first time, Thorfinn will insist on doing everything. He is going to get food, he is going to set up a fire, he is going to keep watch and you are going to rest.

Don't get it wrong though, he isn't saying it in a nice way. While he won't yell or grab you, he is going to sternly order you to stay right there and sleep. Don't even think of being of any help, the way that you are now, you won't be any, anyhow.

He's definitely going to literally look down at you and point his finger at you while saying this.

So, he does as he claimed. Food, warmth and protection are all brought and done by him as he sits close to you.

You're the only one wrapped up in a blanket as Thorfinn keeps watch and cleans his dagger.

You lay down, watching the fire crackle. Thorfinn is quiet.

If you are angry and aggravated yourself, it's best if you don't say anything or else you're going to sour Throfinn's mood more than it already is. In fact, it's better if the both of you stay quiet to digest the whole situation.

If you cry, again, do so silently. Thorfinn won't and can't make an attempt to comfort you. He doesn't know how to on one hand, but also refuses to try for he is too proud and angry to do anything.

However, that doesn't mean he won't notice or won't feel anything over your feelings right now. Having felt death almost brush you, no matter if it came from friend or foe must...feel awful. Your silent tears would let the anger inside him grow but also leave him with his heart falling to his stomach.

Nevertheless, you try to sleep. Laying on your good side, you fluttered your eyes closed, trying to ignore the cold. Though, you really couldn't complain right now. Your stomach is full, the fire was warm enough and you could rest without having to worry...

You glance back up to Thorfinn who was still cleaning his dagger. He seemed calmer than a few hours ago though you could tell that the anger was still bubbling inside of him...just not as strong.

"...Thank you, Thorfinn..." You mumble quietly and if he wasn't wrong, the blonde reckoned he heard a bit of an painful crack in your voice. He stops and looks at you.

Thinking back to the battlefield an slight cold shiver that ran down your back from the sensation of Askeladd's blade. Your face grimaced. Realization hit you that night.

"...You saved me..."

Thorfinn's eyes would widen as well.

It's true...he hadn't really thought what he was doing when charging back. Ignoring the mission.

The young man pouts slightly and doesn't know what to say, especially if you're looking at him with such big eyes. He'd look around as if he's searching for something even if he had no reason to. He simply doesnt want to look at you right now after you said that...

With a small wave of his hand, he brushes the comment, no, the statement off.

"Sleep while you still can. We'll be off before sunrise." He softly let out without sparing you a glance. You can add anything you like but Thorfinn would keep pestering you to rest so you better stop before you start annoying him.

Having no other choice you fall asleep. Thorfinn only looks back at you once he knows you're asleep and can't sense him staring at you. Something akin to a small frown on his face.

He lets a hand hover over your head, he doesn't know why. Once he cant find any proper reason, he lets it rest on the ground. Few men are noisy enough to even reach the deep woods but the blonde doesn't seem to hear them as he's staring at you.

Just as he promised, he kept watch until you all had to go.

The day went on unexpectantly alright.

You and Thorfinn would be at the end of the row, riding on horses the prince still had at his disposal. Only two were left, the other ones didn't survive Thorkell's men. So to test their remaining strength if they could pull the wagon of his highness, and with you two being the youngest and lightest ones of the mercenaries, you were deemed test subjects for the horses. (I just need you two to ride horses...)

You ride in silence, the band marching in front and behind you...but you can't help but glance at Throfinn again and again through the march. Ever since the battle, there has been something eating away at your mind and its bothering you.

Leaning closer to the blonde, you finally ask why he did all of these things. Why he'd go out of his way to do all of this for you...saving you, patching you up, protecting you, feeding you, looking out for you, sticking by you...it was all so much in such a short amount of time. You were helpless and Thorfinn acted like it was his duty to take care of you.

You just needed something. Anything as an answer.

He glanced back at you before quickly staring at the road. "What, did you want to die?" He would let out and nothing more.

You ask again, explaining yourself. It isn't like you don't believe he wouldn't do this for you or - or that you weren't willing to do this for him! It...happened so fast and perhaps you were scared but you've never seen Thorfinn this dedicated to anything else but his revenge before...

He frowns for a bit and stays quiet. He's contemplating on his own, on one hand pondering how to express his feelings and on the other, not really knowing what he feels in the first place.

"I don't want you to die." He kept on staring ahead as he let out in a whisper. Still, he said it like it was a fact.

Your eyes widen and you lean back to properly sit on your horse. Never did you think Thorfinn actively wanted you to die but you never thought you'd...hear him say that either.

Of course. You supposed things made sense now.

"...I don't want to die either." You admitted, feeling a bit low. Obviously, you didn't want to die.

You lean back to the blonde but not as much as before. Your eyes held sincerity even as you sounded a bit blue. "...And I don't want you to die either, Thorfinn".

Finally, he straight up turned to you. There was an unreadable expression on his face even as his brown eyes seemed wider than usual. For a moment something on his visage shifted and he swiftly turned his head away again.

With a low, quiet, seemingly inaudible chuckle, he scoffed; "You're strange".

You almost couldn't believe it as you leaned closer. Was there the slightest and smallest of smiles on Thorfinn's face?

A chuckle of your own escaped you. "You're strange!" Teasingly and with small laughter you let out.

Turning back to you, you were right. This was the first time you saw a genuine smile on his face even if it was faint.

And for him it was the second time he saw this glint in your eyes and warm grin on your face. The first time was when you talked about Vinland.

Aftermath thingies:

A few quick reminders before yall are gonna have to deal with the prince:

Ever since that night where he finally realized that he saved you, Thorfinn has been acting unusually soft with you.

He saved you out of his own will. Not because it will mean he'll get a favor or a duel with Askeladd, it simply meant that he didn't want you to die. There wasn't a single thought running through his head as he attacked the man who tried to harm you (at best. At worst he wanted you dead which is something Thorfinn wholeheartedly believes) even as he was being possessed by his rage. He wasn't thinking when he dragged you with him to the prince, to Thorkell nor did he plan anything through when attempting to patch you up.

He just followed his gut. What he felt.

He caved easily to the rage he felt towards Askeladd and any of the men that did not believe him or dared to mock you both for it. He gave into the belief that right now, injured like that, you were weak and an easy target so he'll take care of things for now. He let the fear muffle his senses when he saw the sword only this close to your neck.

Thorfinn doesn't know if he cares for you. And if he did, then he wouldn't be aware of it. He just doesn't want you to die.

A man as young as him is easily swayed by his emotions.

Was returning his dagger all it took for it to spiral it this way? First a few compromises that turned to favors and now selfless behavior for the other? Was it the slightest speck of respect for his late father, not for his physical prowess but his strength as a person, which he hadn't gotten in years? Was Thorfinn battling the loneliness so hard and desperately that all it took was a soft glint of your eyes and a warm smile when talking about hopes and dreams for him to seek you out?

The image of you dying on the battlefield, butchered and beaten... of the man called 'leader' betray you so cowardly...of you defeated and collected as a 'prize'...it all so angers and frightens him.

Thinking back to that battlefield and imagining how it would be like if you did die...

You would just be another body lying amongst the soldiers and waiting to be reclaimed by the earth as crows take the first bite of your damaged, rotting flesh...

Thorfinn would move on without you. He would be alone again with not a single, upstanding soul by his side. Kindness, jokes and companionship would be no more...

If you died, would his father visit him on his dreams again, telling him he lost his friend?

He cannot explain it but it feels wrong. So much so he feels a disgusting shiver run down his spine just thinking about it.

He gets blinded by his own feelings. And he doesn't even know it.

The lad is like a dog chasing after food, after all.

Theoretically he may confront Askeladd in the middle of a duel (if he gets one in the first place). Asking him what the hell he was thinking, he could have killed you. He would have! Throfinn is sure of it! (No matter what the others say).

In turn, the man just taunts him more, subtly, however. In a way that witnesses might not fully understand, aside from Björn maybe.

(In fact, Björn might be the only one aside from you and Thorfinn who knew what Askeladd was trying to do but he keeps quiet. However, that doesn't mean he approves of his actions. It actually makes him more suspicious on what Askeladd's true feelings about his mercenaries are...)

Back to the taunting, that would anger Thorfinn more than he already was and make him charge at Askeladd without thinking - which, of course, causes him to lose.

This bastard better not mock him! He knew what he saw even if he doesn't understand the intention!

Thorfinn doesnt truly understand that he is being used as a tool. He takes things on a surface level with the way he feels, smells, touches, tastes and sees. And he saw him trying to murder you.

Even so, one day he has to put his issue with that aside if it means having to be the prince's bodyguard while also wanting to get a chance for the next duel. That doesn't mean he will not ever forget waht Askealdd did however...

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shinjisdone · 1 year

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To Soften a Warrior’s Heart (Vinland Saga; Thorfinn; Part 5.2)

In which you have joined Askeladd��s band…and grow closer to the Son of Thors. Though it is more difficult than anyone can could ever imagine…