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gennyanydots · 1 year

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Preschool Family Day

Future Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x f!reader

Part of the ‘Spitfire Universe’ unnecessary to read beforehand but helpful.

“Unca Wooster!” Bradley hears a little voice call with little feets smacking the ground as he runs towards his uncle. The day that little boy can say ‘R’s’ and ‘L’s’ properly is going to be a very, very sad day for Bradley. He wants to be ‘Unca Wooster’ forever. More than he’s wanted anything in a long while. Sure the dagger squad formed a little family after the mission but this little boy is the reason Bradley really felt like it was a true honest to God family. Being an only child and an orphan made family a sore subject for Bradley for a long time but not anymore, not when there was a tiny 3 year old who thought the world of him. Bradley’s sure he can convince Eli’s 8 month old sister Ella that he’s her favorite uncle too one day.

As soon as Eli was within arms reach Bradley was grabbing him securely around the waist and swinging him around, he was the fun uncle after all. He swung little Eli in a circle before throwing him over his right shoulder and walking in the direction Eli had just come from. Very unlikely that Eli is without at least one parent.

It doesn’t take more than ten steps for a stroller and two adults who vaguely look like Eli to come into view and Bradley grins. “You guys missing a kiddo? I think I found one but I can’t remember where I put it,” he says before pretending to look around on the floor and in his pockets.

“I’m wight he,” Eli says in between giggles as he wiggles atop Bradley’s broad shoulder.

“Did you guys hear something?” Bradley asks while looking around again which makes Eli’s mom laugh.

“Naw, we’re pretty sure we only have the baby,” Eli’s father, Jake, says with a chuckle.

“Daaaaaaaad!” Eli yells and continues to wiggle while he laughs.

“Oh!” Bradley says and pulls Eli off his shoulder and holds him out in front of him as if inspecting him then turns him around to face Jake. “Here it is. Are you sure it’s not yours? It looks an awful lot like you, Hangman. If not though then I’m sure I can find a circus to sell him to.”

Jake laughs and walks over and pokes at Eli’s belly who gives an answering giggle, “I don’t know. He looks familiar but I’m just not sure.”

Eli wiggles and puts his arms out towards his dad, “Daddy you know me! I’m Ewi!”

“Ohhhhhhh,” Jake says and grabs Eli from Bradley’s hands. “That’s Eli. I know him.”

Eli laughs shaking his head at his dad, “You so siwwy daddy.”

Jake nods and sets his son onto his feet, “Learned it from the best, bud.”

Bradley grins and winks at the little boy, “He’s talking about me.”

Eli laughs, “O’ couse he is. You the siwwiest, Wooster.”

Bradley grins at Eli, “Someone has to be.”

“Eli has a question for you, Bradley,” Jake’s wife says to him. Bradley’s excited. He’s not sure what it could be but anything to do with his nephew he’s down for. Hell if the boy needed a kidney then Bradley would happily head down to the hospital right now, he’s got two for a reason.

“Umm Unca Wooster I was wonda’en if you coud come to my school on Fwiday,” Eli says while looking down slightly bashfully.

“Of course, dude! Tell me a time and I’ll be there. Why am I coming to your school?” Bradley asks while kneeling down on one knee in front of Eli to be eye level with him.

“It’s family day at preschool and any ‘special adult in your child’s life’ is invited. Since there are different types of families they do special adult instead of mom or dad,” Jake explains. “But that’s the day I have that big meeting. And baby Ella has a doctors appointment so we need a stand in adult and we asked Eli who he wanted-”

“And I said you, Wooster!” Eli finishes for his father, yelling excitedly.

Bradley grins, “I’m happy to be your special adult, buddy. As silly as I feel saying that.”

Jake laughs, “Oh believe me I’m right there with ya but I get it. Not everyone has parents or some have two moms or two dads. We read lots of books about all sorts of families don’t we, bud?”

Eli nods, “Sometimes other kids just have they gandma or gandpa and dats otay too! Cause they loved just the same.”

That’s exactly right, bud,” Bradley says and ruffles Eli’s hair as he stands up.

“Do I need to bring anything or do anything?” Bradley asks looking towards Eli’s mom. If anyone had those sorts of answers it would be Jake’s wife.

She smiles at him and shrugs, “Nope, the paper says there will be refreshments and things and then I think they’re singing a cute little song or something, which you need to record for me please, and then it’s just like hanging out. If you don’t have to come back to work or anything you’re welcome to pick Eli up then and you can have one of your Eli and Rooster days but that’s up to you. You’re on the pickup list so should be fine.” She shakes her head, “His poor teacher. Eli’s pickup list is probably the longest of anyone at the school. And on top of that I put everyone’s call signs next to their names so the teacher doesn’t get confused as to why a ‘Bradley’ or ‘Natasha’ is on the paper but Eli is saying ‘Wooster’ or ‘Phoenix’.” Eli had a lot of aunts and uncles in the dagger squad. Even adopted himself a Grandma Penny and a Grandpa Mav since his only other set of grandparents live in Texas, much to Mav’s happiness. Mav loved being the favorite grandpa. Only Mav would turn being a grandpa into a competition.

Bradley smiles, “I’m sure being this close to Top Gun he’s not the only kiddo who calls his aunts and uncles by their call signs and I’m sure he won’t be the last but he is probably the one with the most adults in his life. Other squads aren’t as cool as we are and didn’t insert themselves in each other’s lives. Plus you guys were the first ones to have kids so they have everyone’s undivided attention.”

“Just means they’re spoiled rotten,” Jake’s wife says with a laugh which causes Jake to roll his eyes.

“Oh yeah because they definitely wouldn’t be spoiled without them. They definitely don’t have a pushover for a mom,” Jake says with a laugh.

She glared at Jake, “Says the man who gives in at the slightly whimper any of the kids make. Including the fluffy one.”

Jake shrugs, “You taught both kids your puppy dog eyes. You even taught the dog. You’re just as spoiled.”

Bradley laughs. He loves spending time with this family. The banter always amuses him. “Okay so Friday I’ll be there and then don’t expect to get your kid back for a while.”

“I mean eventually would be nice but whenever is fine,” Jake says with a shrug.

“We’ll see,” Rooster says with a grin.

By Friday Bradley was so excited to be going to Eli’s school. He woke up early and made sure to look his best. He had to go on base for a little while before Mav dismissed him for the day. He quickly changed into a pair of jeans with a white undershirt and a Hawaiian shirt that Eli got him for Christmas. It was one of the brightest shirts he owned and he absolutely loved it.

Bradley got to Eli’s school a little early and headed inside. There was a check in table, for safety reasons he’s sure, and he checked in as Eli’s ‘special adult’ and got a name tag that said “Uncle Rooster” on it with a small ‘Elijah Seresin’ written in the corner so everyone knew who he belonged to. Not that anyone wouldn’t know since when he walked through the door to Eli’s classroom a loud “Unca Wooster!” was heard and a little body ran as fast as it could and threw itself against Bradley’s legs and from that minute on Eli attached himself to his uncle. Bradley didn’t mind one bit. Eli immediately raised his arms and Bradley easily picked him up and set him on his hip. Eli started to point to all the things in the classroom as he made Bradley walk around.

“An dats the piggy!” Eli said pointing to a cage on the floor in the classroom.

“You have a piggy in your room?” Bradley asks walking over to it.

Eli shook his head and wiggles to be let down, which Bradley quickly did then squated down next to the cage. There was a name tag attached to one of the bars that had a name tag on it that Bradley read out loud, “Dr Rooster Cupcake.”

Eli turned to him grinning, “Da Wooster was my idea.”

Bradley chuckles, “I have no doubt about that.”

“We just mostly call him Rooster or Roo,” Bradley hears behind him.

Bradley turns around seeing a smiling woman standing behind him and he quickly stood up.

“Ms. Y/N dis is my Unca Wooster!” Eli said and slipped his little hand into Bradley’s. This must be Eli’s teacher. Damn. If Bradley knew Eli’s teacher was this pretty he would have offered to pick him up more. Or every day. Maybe he’ll start.

Bradley smiles and offers his other hand, “Hi, I’m Bradley, oh oh I mean Uncle Rooster or or Bradley. Whichever is fine. I like both. You can use either or both or whatever,” Bradley says rambling. He’s not usually like this. He knows how to talk to pretty girls. Well he knows how to talk to pretty girls at bars. Apparently he’s not as good at talking to pretty girls in preschools.

You smile and shake his hand, “Hi, Uncle Rooster or Bradley. I’m Ms. Y/N. I’m Eli’s teacher.”

“She’s da best! She let us name da piggy afta you!” Eli says pointing at the cage.

“Piggy?” Bradley questions.

You chuckle , “I’ll show you.” You open up the top of the cage and lifted up a little blue platform and reach in and grab a little brown and white fuzzy body. “This is Rooster.” You say as you stand up and came back over to Bradley and Eli. “He’s a Guinea pig.”

“Ohhhhh a Guinea pig. I thought he meant a real piggy and was scared because that’s not a very big cage for an actual pig,” Bradley says and reaches out to pet the little body but stop just before touching him and look at you, you nod encouragingly and Bradley closes the gap and pets the small animal.

“You’re right it would be too small for a piggy but it’s actually a really large cage for a Guinea pig. Typically there’s a play yard so he has something like 17 square feet to himself in all with the cage and play yard. The kids love to watch him. Every morning he has zoomies where he just runs around his play yard in circles. The kids love it when he does that,” you explain with a giggle.

“Yeah! He wuns and wuns! And sometimes I get ta give him a tweat!” Eli says excitedly. You squat down and let Eli pet the little guy. Bradley smiles proudly watching his nephew carefully pet the small animal. “Fwont ta back wight, Ms. Y/N?”

You smile at Eli, “Exactly right, babe. Front to back or he gets all huffy and we wouldn’t want that would we?”

Bradley smiles watching the two of you. He wonders what it would take to get you to call him babe. Is that weird? It’s probably weird. Bradley doesn’t want to make things weird for Eli.

Soon the Guinea pig gets a little wiggly and you stand up and walk back over to the cage and set him back inside, “Okay Eli what do we do now?”

“We wash hands! No gettin’ sick!” Eli says then runs off to the little sink in the classroom. You follow behind and then help him wash his hands and then you also wash your hands. Bradley follows the two of you and washes his hands third. Bradley looks around the room and more adults seemed to have come in while he was meeting the Guinea pig.

“I have to greet the others but I’ll check in with you guys in a little bit, okay?” You say to Bradley and Eli.

“Otay! Have fun!” Eli says with a smile. Bradley chuckles, “Yeah have fun.”

You scrunch your nose playfully at the two of them and smile before going off to greet the other adults.

Eli pulls Bradley over to a table and has him sit down with him and they both color some pictures, Eli explaining all the different colors to him as he uses them.

You’ve caught Bradley looking at you a couple times, each time he immediately looks down towards his picture and blushes.

Once done with the pictures Eli puts them in his little backpack and Bradley helps.

“There are some snacks and drinks in the hallway if anyone would like. I’m about 15 minutes the kids have a performance they would like to show you,” you call loudly to the room. It’s gotten pretty crowded since Bradley arrived. Every child had at least one adult. Some even had two. Bradley’s pretty sure one kid has whom he assumes is his parents and his grandparents.

Everyone seems to head out into the hallway at once and Bradley sees Eli kind of hesitate.

“Hey why don’t we wait a minute before getting our snack? That’s a lot of people and I don’t feel like fighting some dad for a cookie,” Bradley says to Eli who grins up at him.

Eli takes Bradley’s hand and leads him to a table, “But you would win Unca Wooster. You in da Navy like daddy.”

“You’re right, bud. I would totally win in a fight with all these adults,” Bradley says. He sits down in a tiny chair and Eli scrambles to sit in his lap. Bradley chuckles and helps Eli up.

“You know we definitely don’t condone violence here,” you say to Bradley walking with a stern look on your face and arms crossed over your chest.

“Well I was just saying and he started it and…” Bradley tried to explain before noticing a hint of a smile on your face. “You’re kidding.”

You laugh, “I am. Kinda. We don’t condone violence but I was just teasing. But we don’t use our hands and feet if we’re mad do we, Eli?”

Eli shakes his head, “No, we use wods and we take tuns with toys.”

“That’s exactly right,” you say with a fond smile. “We use our words and we take turns. You’re so smart, Eli.”

Eli grins, “I know. I good. I vewy good.” Bradley laughs while shaking his head and wraps his arms around the little boy. Clearly he’s his father’s son.

You look over at the two and raise an eyebrow, “Is that a thing?”

Bradley nods, “It is. His dad is uhh well he’s a little bit of a cocky pilot. Great guy. Just full of himself.”

You nod, “I’ve met a few of those kind of pilots.”

Bradley shrugs, “We’re not all like that. Pretty sure if I had ended up like that my mom’s ghost would kick my ass.”

Eli gasps and turns to face Bradley, “Unca Wooster! Dats one of da wods we not awowed ta use! I tellin Ganpa.”

Bradley blushes, “I’m so sorry, Eli. Sorry, Ms. Y/N. She would probably kick my butt for this too.”

“Mommy will do it. Or Ganpa. I have you phone pwease?” Eli asks.

Bradley shakes his head, “Grandpa is in a meeting with daddy. We’ll tell on me later.”

“So maybe you are like that,” you say with a chuckle.

“I swear I’m not. It’s hard to remember to turn the cursing off. I’m going to have to do push-ups later over this,” Bradley says with a small groan.

“Push-ups? Really?” You ask with a laugh.

Bradley nods, “Grandpa Mavvie is a stickler for swearing. Last Christmas someone from our squad said ‘F word Santa’ and a little boy heard it and refused to say Santa without the fun word before it. We had a squad meeting about it. Then on Christmas his dad said a bad word and his mom said he was going to have to do push-ups and Grandpa Mavvie then made that everyone’s punishment for saying bad words.”

“Wow that’s rough. I’m glad that doesn’t apply to me. I’ve definitely accidentally said things I shouldn’t hear before,” you say with a shrug.

Bradley playfully scoffs, “Around my nephew? How could you, honey? This is unacceptable!” He blushes when he realizes what he called you.

You laugh, “I know, I know! But try not saying the s h word while you’re across the room watching a kid try and grab an open gallon of paint above their head from a counter. You’d say it too.”

“Oh I’m sure I would,” Bradley says laughing. Huh. You didn’t seem to bat an eye being called that.

Eli turns to Bradley, “Snack now?”

Bradley nods and helps Eli off his lap, “Yep snack now.”

Bradley nods at you as they walk out to the hallway and get a snack together.

During the performance Bradley makes sure to record it on his phone to send to Eli’s parents.

Most people were starting to leave and everyone was taking their kid. Of course Bradley planned to too. No way is Eli staying when they can have an afternoon hanging out together at the park. Maybe even get ice cream.

There were only a few people left, mostly talking amongst themselves. You were talking to one family before the smiled at you and said goodbye.

Bradley and Eli at some point had decided they needed to help clean up. Some people just left messes and Bradley didn’t want you to have to clean up such a big mess so he and Eli cleaned the tables off together. Eli was excited to be a big helper for his teacher. Clearly he was a big fan of his teacher which Bradley was glad of. School is always better when you like your teacher.

When you turned around from talking with the family that just left you noticed the big mess you were going to have to clean up was already cleaned up and two individuals standing off to the side looking pretty proud of themselves. You smile at them both as you head over, “I assume I have you two to thank for cleaning up the mess?”

Eli grins, “I’m a big helper! Unca Wooster said we shud cwean up and be gentemen.”

“Well you two seem to be the best gentlemen. Thank you for helping me,” You say and squat down and hold your arms out that Eli excitedly runs into and hugs you. You smile and hug him back.

“We goin to go pway at da park!” Eli says excitedly as he lets go of you to run back to his uncle.

“You are? That’s so exciting! I’m sure you’ll have so much fun!” You say matching Eli’s excitement.

Eli nods, “Unca Wooster is so much fun!”

You smile, “He seems like it.”

Bradley blushes, “Okay Eli why don’t you get your things, buddy.”

Eli runs off to gather his things then runs back.

“Bye Ms. Y/N!” Eli says grabbing Bradley’s hand.

“Bye Eli! Bye Uncle Rooster or Bradley,” you say smiling and waving. “Hope I see you around.”

Bradley smiles, “I sure hope so, honey, I sure hope so.”

AN: Did I name my class pet Rooster? Yes. Yes I did.

#bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #rooster x reader #spitfire universe #rooster x female reader #preschool family day

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chamomileteainabuttercup · 3 years

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Thanks for tagging me in, @demisexuallupin

How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently 24, but there are many more orphans, whether from fandoms I no longer enjoy or because I really didn't like how they were written any more. I orphaned rather than deleting them because I knew from comments there were people who'd enjoyed them, so I might as well leave them available in some form.

What’s your total AO3 word count?

782,484 (probably a lot closer to a million if we could count the orphans, I know at least two of them were over 100,000 words each)

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Currently I've got fics for Star Wars, various Star Treks, The Witcher, Tintin, Jeeves and Wooster and Sailor Moon. Past fandoms included A Song of Ice and Fire/Game of Thrones and Steven Universe (see above about "fandoms I no longer enjoy") - I'm not sure how many in total.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Curse of Chamomile (Geraskier)

Fairy Tales in Deep Space (Garashir)

Locked Inside (also Garashir and have you ever noticed how "Geraskier" and "Garashir" look like the same word written in different bad handwriting also both involve a pretty-eyed slut called Julian)

Boba's Back (Bobadin)

No Peeking (Dincobb)

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Oh yes! If only to say thank you and I'm happy they enjoyed it. As for why, it's a combination of "it's just polite," "it's a gentle form of self-promotion" and "the response and interaction is a huge part of why I actually publish stories online instead of just thinking about them to myself." The best comments are the ones that turn into a real back-and-forth conversation, and those often generate more ideas for the story.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I think it's To the Island, a Garashir fic which ended with the two of them concluding they couldn't be openly together because Garak has a lot of enemies and it would be too dangerous. (But I wrote a sequel where they reunite some years later when circumstances have changed.)

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I'm trying to think if I have, but I think the closest I got was crossing over characters from Star Trek: the Next Generation and Deep Space Nine, and it was an AU - not very crazy at all, I just adjusted time so that two characters who would have attended Starfleet Academy several years apart were there at the same time and fell in love. That's Cadets and it's Datashir if you're interested.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not outright hate, but a very ungracious comment of the "I don't like this ship but your writing is good" variety.

If it had been "I didn't use to like this ship but I enjoyed your story so much I'm starting to feel differently!" I would have been very pleased (and I have had some comments like that), but no. If you don't even like the ship, please don't read my story, it is not for you.

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

hahahaha I write little else! A big part of why I write fanfic at all is that I want sexy material with the characters I like from media that doesn't get that (onscreen/page) sexy. I do have some G-rated fics, but they're in the minority. My smut tends to be romantic and fluffy and tender, though at the same time it can be relatively hardcore/kinky, I just think it's possible to have romantic, tender rimjobs and canings, you know? The characters are always in love or on the way there. It is virtually always queer. I've written more m/m than f/f, mostly because the SF/fantasy/adventure-type stories I like have disproportionately male casts with more screentime and interesting development given to male characters, and that is an industry problem not a me problem. (I love Sailor Moon the best and that has an overwhelmingly female cast which is great, but the characters are mostly in their early teens and I don't find them sexy at my time of life.)

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not to my knowledge.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, and I don't think I could. I've written fic based on discussions I've had, so I consider that co-created by my discussion partner (eg Just Business, Nothing Personal with @djarining) but actual writing feels very personal and idiosyncratic to me and I'm not sure I could mesh with someone else's writing effectively, even if we did it in a relatively discrete way like alternating chapters.

What’s your all time favourite ship?

Probably Garashir, but I don't have a strong degree of favouritism.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

oh uhhhh are we counting incomplete fics that I abandoned a long time ago? Because that's most of 'em, I'm very poor at finishing stories. I tend to want to go on until I've run out of ideas completely and have nothing left for a conclusion.

What are your writing strengths?

Lively dialogue with distinctive character voices seems to be the biggie. Also generating a vibe of comfort and healing. I think I write fairly vivid descriptions.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Not finishing things, struggling to create a plot, getting bogged down because I suddenly hit this weird mental state where I can't figure out how to describe kissing without making it sound gross or boring, and doing the writing-a-sex-scene equivalent of falling asleep right after coming - the chapter tends to end a bit abruptly after a climax because I've spent a long time writing through all this emotional and sexual intensity for the characters and I want to finally push the chapter out and get some response to it.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I don't care for it myself but I don't object to other people doing it! The fandom I'm currently most involved with is The Mandalorian and there's this current of people using lots of Mando'a dialogue, especially to express deep personal feelings, with characters who we've never canonically heard use the language, eg Boba Fett referring to Jango as his buir when in Attack of the Clones he called him Dad. I'm not saying it's incorrect, people are free to imagine whatever they enjoy, but it throws me off/alienates me slightly while reading - like it doesn't feel natural to me that Boba and Din would speak Mando'a to each other, especially because given Boba's life story I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't speak it well or feel comfortable with it. It's entirely a matter of personal taste rather than something I disapprove of, I want to make that quite clear.

I mildly disapprove of people scattering in words of a real-world language that they clearly don't speak (eg gratuitous "hai" instead of "yes" in an anime-based fic) and are just getting from a phrasebook or Google Translate, just because it's kind of clunky and not really the flavour enhancement I think they intend it to be.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

I think The Vision of Escaflowne. A very, very long time ago.

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

Whichever one I'm currently enjoying writing! I feel very fond of Curse of Chamomile because it was the first Witcher thing I wrote based on having only watched the Netflix series, and I felt quite indimidated to begin with but the comments I got were welcoming and lovely and some people even said the characterisation I arrived at worked like a blend of the Netflix series and the books, which was a lucky trick given that I have never read them. That was a really encouraging and up-cheering experience. A lot of the early comments coincided with the time I was on a very enjoyable winter holiday to Taupō so when I had downtime I could refresh AO3 on my phone and there was often something new, and it all just reinforced my Good Time so I remember it fondly.

Tagging, ummm, I always feel awkward doing this because what if someone else tagged them already and I didn't notice? Anyway, we'll say @djarining and @beboots and honestly, anyone else reading this who would like to have a go, consider this your free tag.

#fanfic #ao3

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mostweakhamlets · 5 years

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*whispers* what is the jeeves thing pls explain

Listen 👏 up 👏

The Jeeves series is books and novels written by P.G Wodehouse. They take place in, I guess, the 1910-1920s even though I know there was a floating timeline so some are in the 70s when Wodehouse wrote them? I'm not sure. I haven't read those ones I'll be honest.

It's about this man, Bertie Wooster, who's part of the idle rich class in England. He doesn't do anything besides spend money and go to clubs and get into awful situations. His family is very wealthy, and he lives off his inheritance (we assume he's an orphan). He's super sweet, though. I cannot stress enough how much I love him. He's very selfless and will do anything to help anyone. He often gives away money without a second thought and listens to all of his friends' problems while promising to help. He's also very naive and gets scammed a few times, but I don't think he's physically capable of saying no. Which just leads to very absurd situations.

He's about 25, but this boy is an idiot. He cannot take care of himself. He sleeps until noon and doesn't know how to make tea.

That's where Jeeves comes in. He's Bertie's valet (a gentleman's gentleman (a servant that basically looks after the household and the individual)). He's the only smart character in the books. Bertie and his friends are constantly getting engaged and getting into trouble because of whoever they have a crush on this week (though iirc Bertie doesn't seem to fall in love as much as his aunts try arranging marriages for him). Jeeves is kinda a trickster character. He always has a plan for Bertie to get out of trouble, but he's also caused his own trouble from time to time for his own amusement. He's pretty loyal tho, and very dignified, and very stoic.

The character inspired Ask.com which used to be Askjeeves.com. "Jeeves" is also a colloquialism that people use when referring to a butler (though Jeeves wasn't a butler). The books had a big impact.

Then, there was a tv series made with Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry as Bertie and Jeeves respectably. It was as good as you'd expect Fry and Laurie to be when they're together. The cast did change quit a bit, and some of the other characters aren't as fun as Bertie and Jeeves. There's also some seasons that are set in America, and they do the whole "every American has a super harsh voice" thing which can be grating at times (especially if you're American and don't quite find it funny just bc that's not an ingrained part of our humor). It's worth watching, though! I've been watching it for the past couples days to cheer myself up.

The tv series also changes a few things about Bertie's character. Since Hugh Laurie is a musical genius, they have him play piano and sing a lot. It's a great addition to his character. It shows that he's not completely useless and gives him something to do rather than just sit around his apartment when the scenes are set there. It also leads to cute moments like Jeeves playing with him in a rare moment of softness. The dynamic between Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry is amazing. It kinda gives a different tone to the relationship. They're closer in age, and it feels like a friendship.

In the books, they're definitely friends but iirc Jeeves is a bit older. He's there to provide some stability to Bertie's life and imo he sort of takes on this caregiving role that Bertie doesn't have (his aunts are bossy and his parents are dead and his friends are all idiots as well). At the end of the day, Jeeves is there to clean up after the trouble and ensure that Bertie will have a hot breakfast in the morning.

#jeeves and wooster

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cuddyclothes · 6 years

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These fics deserve more love!

(I accidentally deleted this post, sorry!)

When I want something interesting to read, I read AUs. AU or not, these are fics which have not received nearly enough love. I'm mostly listing fics with under 1K hits, some with less than 350. There are also more traditional fics, of course! These are all on AO3. Bertie's Beau by @ladykeane Modern day AU. This is a sequel to "Bertie's Blog". Bertie Wooster is a social media doyen who played the first drag Elle Woods in a local production of "Legally Blonde". Reginald Jeeves is a biracial lawyer with a...difficult...Indian family. This is screamingly funny. Every few chapters is a self-contained story, with all of the complications and characters translated intact into the present day. There are ill-advised engagements, romantic misunderstandings, etc. Bertie and Jeeves are madly in love. Even though Jeeves remains as sartorially tyrannical as ever. The Adventures of Mini Bertie by orphan account AU. After the disaster of Plumbo-Jumbo, Tuppy Glossop gets hold of another contraption that shrinks Bertie down to the size of a mouse. The detail in this fic is wonderful, and mini!Bertie managing to pleasure Jeeves is extremely hot. Deus Ex by innocentsmith AU. Jeeves moves in mysterious ways his wonders to perform. This takes it one step farther. He goes for his annual vacation where he acts as a deus ex machina in other worlds, including Shakespeare where Jeeves advises Rosalind, who is pretending to be Ganymede! However, his world is disturbed when Cupid (who will remind you of your favorite Drone) and Psyche show up. This is an odd but well-done fic. Jeeves is perfectly IC. The Matter Of The Firebird by Not_You AU. (Can you tell I have a fondness for AUs?) This retelling of a Russian folktale has Bertie as a clumsy prince sent out on a variety of difficult errands. All of your favorite characters are here. Madeline Bassett is a simpering princess who falls for Bertie, Spode is a dastardly villain, and Jeeves is trapped in the form of a giant wolf. Funny and touching. Mister Robots(Steampunk AU) by orphan account This is one of my favorites.The tags and description are rather off-putting. Bertie helps design and create humanoid "robots" destined for domestic service. He longs for the long-dead family butler, Jeeves. Despite Rocky Todd's warnings, he creates "Jeeves", packing the robot's "brain" with knowledge. "Jeeves" evolves into the Jeeves we all know and love. This has red-hot smut as Jeeves discovers the wonders of sex and falls in love with Bertie. A great plot and phenomenal world-building. Jeeves On Holiday by ricketybridgeThis is a mainstream fic. In epistolary form, it has Bertie wrecking Jeeves's holidays every year. I sat in a London hotel lobby, using their PC, howling with laughter. Jeeves And The Mustache by Franzbibliothek Set in New York. Melchette has a thick mustache that somehow compels men to do his bidding. When he must be stopped, Bertie steps into the breach, dressing in drag to seduce him. With Jeeves's help, of course. A crossover that works. Non-Jooster We Want Haddock by @wotwotleigh-prime You might balk at this, but it works perfectly. How can you not love a fic in which Jeeves attends a servants' ball in drag? This is set shortly after The Mating Season. Bertie can't stop thinking about devastatingly handsome Esmond Haddock (neither could PGW, trust me on this). When Corky and Esmond sever their engagement, Bertie goes to Deverill Hall to patch things up. This is clever and extremely funny. And hot.

#jeeves and wooster #fic rec #funny #smut #alternate universe #and now for something completely different #go read these immediately #also regular universe

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professorsparklepants · 7 years

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Girlvek secret marriage au

(AKA: Falling in love with Gil Hotzfaller was the worst mistake Tarveka ever made).

So, here’s what I got:

Tarveka “Veka” Sturmvoraus, the eight year old second daughter of the Prince of Sturmhalten, begs, pleads, and weeps crocodile tears until her father sends her to Castle Wulfenbach to be educated with the future rulers of Europa. There she meets orphan-without-a-past Gil Hotzfaller, who quickly becomes her best friend, and when they break into the records vault looking for his family records, instead of staying behind to dig deeper, she runs after Gil to try and comfort him. Neither of them get caught.

Several years pass. Both of them break through remarkably early, likely around the same time, and they’re told by the Baron to keep Gil’s spark quiet (sensibly, Veka thinks, since a breakthrough this young in a boy without any family will draw the attention of a great deal of people eager to piss off the baron). Other than the Baron and Von Pinn, she’s the only person who knows about it, since she just happened to be in the fight place at the right time, which was next to Gil, where she always is.

(I haven’t decided when exactly Gil found out about his real parentage, but it’s somewhere around his breakthrough. Gil gets scared into keeping quiet, but his friendship with Veka never suffers because he knew she was his friend even before he was someone important).

Somewhere around 13 or 14 she and Gil start quietly dating. It’s an open secret among the kids at the school, who’ve known they were going to and up together for YEARS, but since Gil is a nobody and Veka is 50 families they know to keep quiet and save the two of them grief. Everything seems to be going great until their first big fight as a couple, because it’s a BAD one. Veka wants to look into Gil’s family more, because she remembers how miserable he was after the vault and knows something else is going on. Gil reacts badly and accuses her of not caring about anyone unless they’re useful to her. Veka snaps back that Gil has been anything but useful to her. Gil says he’s been useful enough keeping all of her secrets. Things deteriorate further from there; they both run off in a huff.

Gil mentions the fight (if not the context) to his father, because Veka looking into his past is something he knows the Baron doesn’t want. Klaus then proceeds to over-react and expel Veka from the school.... without telling Gil. Veka is under the impression that Gil went to the Baron and sold her out. Gil is under the impression that Veka threw a fit and decided to break up with him in the most definitive way possible. She refuses to look at him or say goodbye when she leaves.

Several bitter, miserable years pass.

After living with her father’s terrifying and ethically unsettling agenda for god knows how long, Tarveka finally able to escape and attend university in Paris. She’s not free, because the Mongfishes rubbed their dirty fingerprints all over the Order and there’s no way to escape their agenda, but she’s as good as she can get. Maybe while she’s gone she can formulate a plan to scrub the order down.

Mostly she ends up finding dead bodies at society parties, but that’s practically normal in her family. Developing a hobby of amateur detective work is not, but it’s significantly more fun, and she gets a good friendship with Colette Voltaire out of it, so everybody wins. She’s almost starting to enjoy herself when she runs into Gil again.

Their first meeting is not pleasant. Neither is the second. Or the third, or the fourth.... For two people who hate each other, Colette is fond of pointing out (to the both of them) they tend to meet a lot. Tarveka is fairly certain it’s because the universe hates her. It’s the only explanation.

After several vaguely humorous events where Gil ends up crashing one of Tarveka’s cases, or Veka ends up caught in Gil’s adventures, or their two seemingly unrelated genres of after-school activities turn out to have been entangled from the beginning, the two of them settle into a vitriolic partnership founded on mutual survival and Not Talking About It, With Anyone, Not Even If You Paid Me Colette. The turning point is when they get into a REALLY BAD fight where they drag up all the stuff that happened on the castle and find out that both of them have different stories and someone must be wrong here, and maybe it’s both of us.

I’m not sure on the specifics of how their relationship progresses from there but I’m sure it involves a lot of attempted murder and rampaging monsters and slow burn, and the two of them in various stages of undress due to action scene clothing damage and pulpy fan-service tropes. At one point Colette suggests that Gil knock Veka up so she can retire from politics in disgrace to become Paris’ greatest dressmaker and everyone chokes on their drinks in horror (Wooster) and embarrassment (Gil and Veka). Maybe there’s fake dating. Eventually they start REAL dating again, and Veka makes a lot of jokes about Gil being her kept man, and everything is (mostly) great.

This is where the secret marriage plot comes in.

Martellus comes to town for a few weeks and pays more attention to Tarveka than normal. Like, a weird amount of attention. He danced with her four times at the last ball they both went to, and even spending time “keeping Grandma company” hadn’t deterred him. She’d been forced to resort to throwing eligible young ladies with power hungry mothers at him to keep him away from her.

Meanwhile, Anevka’s letters start mentioning lab accidents at Sturmhalten--specifically, her lab. They never have lab accidents at home. The idea is ludicrous, which means someone is trying to kill Anevka and not even bothering to be subtle about it. Which in their family is a long list.

She doesn’t think to connect the two until she has a dream one night where she’s the sovereign Princess of Sturmhalten, happy and glowing, congratulated by her many powerful and influential guests who all adore her. Someone asks if she’s looking forward to the coronation, and she replies Only as much as my husband is! And an arm wraps around her waist and she leans into it as Tweedle kisses her cheek and calls her wife and she wakes up in a cold sweat.

She and Anevka are the only thing standing between Tweedle and incontestable rule of Europa. If either of them have sons, their claim will be better than Tweedle’s, unless they’re his sons. Anevka is dangerous and stubborn and would castrate him with a socket wrench if she knew he was even considering it, but everyone thought Veka was a pushover who did whatever her father told her because that was the price of surviving. Grandma hadn’t stopped Tweedle from dancing with her even though Veka knew she was the favorite grandchild, which meant either she was in on it or she was expecting Veka to solve her own problems, and if Grandma wasn’t openly supporting her then she had little chance of talking her father around, and she would have to marry Tweedle, and have his children, and let him touch her--

TWEEDLE CAN’T MARRY HER IF SHE’S ALREADY MARRIED TO SOMEBODY ELSE.

This is more of a ”panic at 3 am” plan than a Tarveka plan but when she wakes up (again) the next morning it seems like a good idea, because she’s actually still panicking. Gil spits out his coffee when she brings it up and then Colette spits out her tea when they ask her to be the witness.

In the future when asked, Gil’s defense for going through with this is 20% “I thought it was just technical and she would ask for an annulment later” and 80% “I didn’t actually believe it was really happening until we literally signing the marriage contract”. Tarveka’s is, besides the aforementioned panicking, “AT THE TIME Gil was the only person I trusted not to take advantage of me”. Colette, when asked, claims that a. they were clearly hopelessly in love, b. she knew that Tarveka was miserable at home and would be even more so if she ever broke up with Gil to get a political marriage, and c. the fallout was going to be HILARIOUS. (None of which are WRONG, per-say).

There’s a short honeymoon period until Gil realizes that like.... if they’re.... actually doing this.... he should probably like.... actually tell Veka who he is. So they have a serious talk about the trajectory of their relationship and how neither of them actually wants a divorce and at one point probably like, mush, and then he tells her. And she is SUPER PISSED. Especially since lying about your identity makes it a voidable marriage.

To quote Doc, who gave me permission to steal this piece of gold:

"Hey, I'm still the same Gil you know and love, right?" "Sentimentally, YES! Legally, NO!"

Like, this puts her in an amazing political position over the order and tbh most of Europa but she’s still SUPER PISSED because she married Gil specifically because she loves him and thought she could trust him and the fact that he was lying to her about this! For years! Even when they were kids! Fucks her up a little.

Right in the middle of this emotional shit show is when Tarveka finds out her sister is dying. She makes up with Gil, a little, when she’s leaving (and she has to leave, because even if Anevka was a menace and made her skin crawl she’s still her sister), and promises they’ll talk more if when she comes back.

THEN she finds out their father put Anevka into the summoning machine, and more panicking happens. Because her father put his DAUGHTER and HEIR into the summoning machine to get possessed by his EX-GIRLFRIEND and after he got over his hypocritical grief there was no proof he wouldn’t try it again with the spare.

I imagine that the extra years spent on Castle Wulfenbach gave Veka time and space to come to the same conclusions Tarvek gets to in canon when he finally has time away from his family--that no one deserves the sort of thing Lucrezia wanted to do to them. The difference here being that she got thrown back into it as a young teenage girl with the implication that as long as she was good, she’d be safe. This is proof that was a lie, and that she’s never been safe here at all, and maybe only survived through luck.

Clearly now the only way to make sure she survives long enough to heal Anevka is to cut her father and the Other out of the equation altogether. So... she contacts the Baron about the veritable army living underneath her town, armed with dozens of hive engines. As you do.

I think you guys can imagine how exactly that goes.

After everyone that needs killing’s been killed and everything that needs handling is being handled, the Baron tracks her down and demands to know why he shouldn’t just kill her immediately for treason and harboring Agents of the Other.

To which her response is “Because I’m your daughter-in-law.”

And that’s where things start getting interesting.

#i need a tag for this #secret marriage au #lectures #girl genius #why did i spend 2 hours on this rip #genderbending

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ndrmag · 7 years

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Contributor Interview with Gwen E. Kirby

Gwen E. Kirby’s stories appear or are forthcoming in Guernica, Mississippi Review, New Ohio Review, Ninth Letter, and elsewhere. She won the 2017 DISQUIET Literary Prize for Fiction and is currently a PhD student at the University of Cincinnati.

Your stories entangle historical narrative, traditional mythologies, and fiction in ways that produce such a fascinating tension between old and new, real and imagined. As a writer who curates, revises, and stitches together existing narratives in the process of producing new ones, how do you see yourself conveying truth in your writing? What truths do you see emerging from “First Woman Hanged for Witchcraft in Wales, 1594”?

When I’m writing a story, I don’t think about trying to convey TruthTM, as that would completely paralyze me. I do, however, search for a tone that feels true to the subject matter and when (if) I find it, then I know I have a story that is working. I suppose I love weaving narratives together precisely because I find the tension between tone and story generative, particularly when pairing modern diction and my own weird sense of humor with historical events. “First Woman Hanged” is about the historical figure Gwen Ferch Ellis (who really was the first woman hanged for witchcraft in Wales), and when I was writing I wanted her to be so much more than another woman killed by ignorant people. I wanted her to be angry and funny and I wanted her to be a storyteller. When witch-Gwen recreates the story of the afanc, she passes on that same agency to the virgin character. Storytelling in which women are the speakers and the heroes helps women be storytellers and heroes. So I guess that is the truth I was going for after all. It’s a good thing I didn’t think of it until just now.

Does your writing process follow a consistent pattern? Do you typically start with the research, the characters, or with some kind of emotional thread?

My writing process does follow a pretty consistent pattern. If I find something that interests me (like a dead witch with my name), I’ll carry it around in my head until, if I’m lucky, I hit on the voice that is going to carry me into and through the piece. Voice is central for me. I’ve discovered ¾ to my continuing frustration! ¾ that voice is where I produce the energy to move the story forward and that if I haven’t hit on the right voice, all the editing in the world is not going to make a story get up and walk.

Another story of yours that I love, the exquisitely titled “Shit Cassandra Saw That She Didn’t Tell the Trojans Because at that Point Fuck Them Anyway,” which you published recently in SmokeLong Quarterly (and which our readers should check out immediately), engages with Greek myth. What led you to Wales this time?

Wales is actually a much more normal place for me to be! I don’t know more than the average bear about Greek mythology, but I am somewhat obsessed with British history and am actually working on a novel set in Bath in the 1790s (it involves my personal hero, Mary Wollstonecraft). Growing up, I read and reread Jane Eyre and The Secret Garden and Great Expectations. I think I wanted to be a plucky British orphan more than anything in the world (actually, this is still partly true). My parents helped my obsession along by introducing me to Blackadder and Jeeves and Wooster and many other awesome BBC productions.

Though I am curious, asking about your favorite writers seems a bit cliché, and so much of this story revolves around the natural world: So what are some non-human inspirations that kindle your creative fire?

Clearly from this interview, I find history and literature very inspiring. I do go outside and enjoy the natural world and I have lived in a lot of different places in the last decade, which helps me find new interests and new places to set my work. But I always come back to books. One of my favorite activities of the last year was reading for my doctoral exams, which focused on women’s novels from 1700–1900, and then summarizing the books to friends at bars. Okay, that sounds like not very much fun, but the thing is, those books are chock full of wacky, ridiculous plots, amazing one liners, and sneaky, wicked moments of feminist rebellion. When I describe them to friends (“And then this asshole tries to make a move on her in the carriage before abducting her to his castle in Italy and she is like, oh hell no!” and etc.) I find myself reminded again and again that history and literature are just so intensely human, so perpetually modern, so ready for us to appreciate if we take the time to look. And that helps me think about how my own work engages the past and at least tries to make a contribution to the future.

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