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land-of-classpects-and-analysis · 3 years

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The Knight Class Analysis

Ah, yes, Knights. A Class beloved by many for countless different reasons, yet one that often brings about the most discussion. It is oddly suiting for the Knight Class to cause such a thing, as Knights have shown to somehow always be the center of whatever show they may find themself in - whether they pushed themself to that center or not. Even when the brightest spotlights shine down upon them, though, there still never seems to be a way to reveal all of the intricacies of this Class. It’s one filled with the most speculation rather than answers, the most debates, discussions, and analyses than many of the other Classes. Perhaps this is why it is a Class so dearly beloved by the people in this Fandom. Of course, there are many other reasons why people do love the Knight Class. Whether it be the protective, devoted, and underlying caring natures of the Knights, the facades they are capable of putting up for countless years in order to hide their insecurities, or they simply love the long and glorious cape of the outfit. There are just as many reasons people adore the Knight Class as there are people who, well, love this Class. For this month, every last possible Knight will find their way upon this stage and within the spotlight to have their stories told and titles analyzed. For today, though, let’s focus on the Class itself.

Knights are those whose powers seem the most obvious, yet also the most complex and mysterious. Some argue that Knights serve their Aspect, while others claim that they exploit it, and so many others. As November came quickly approaching, it became obvious to your Host here that there was a little bit more of a hidden option that, personally speaking, never seemed to hit anyone else’s radar. Knights are those who actively protect exploitation of their Aspect, or they actively protect through exploiting their Aspect. However, that is quite the mouthful and far too long. For the sake of everyone’s time, it will be shortened as such: Knights are those who actively protect their Aspect, or actively protect through their Aspect. While there is no doubt some people who have already thought and written about this, it has not come towards my own attention that this take on the Knight Class exists. Now that the basis of the Knight’s power has been established, it is time to go over the journey for the Knight, as well as how they would go about participating in the protection of or through their Aspect.

The way the Knight’s journey begins is often one wherein destiny will equip them with their Aspect, but not in a way that directly benefits the Knight. If anything, the way in which they are equipped with their Aspect is oftentimes something that brings the Knight many battles, internally or otherwise, most of which they will lose in the beginning. While this may seem as though the Knight’s Aspect is out to bring only pain and suffering to the Knight, that is actually far from the truth. Every battle the Knight faces is meant to bring them closer and become more attuned with their Aspect. Learning the ins and outs of how it works, what it looks like in other people, being able to identify its weak and strong points. Deep down, this is exactly what is happening within the Knight, as their Aspect grows and blooms inside of their hearts through every fight they participate in. The Knight should be one of the quickest players to connect and master their Aspect, and to those on the outside that might just appear to be the case. To those who are not the Knight, they seem like someone who has everything in their life held together perfectly - a flawless, unstoppable force of confidence, ego, and badassery. Little do any of them know is that the Knight doesn’t truly know what they are doing at all, especially in regards to their Aspect.

One of the biggest flaws of the Knight is that they are often so quick to hide themself beneath a facade or even a few, as it truly depends on who they are talking to. Due to their upbringing of having to go through so many different battles, and having lost just as many, one of the biggest fears of the Knight is that they are not strong enough to survive. The pride of a Knight is one of the most paradoxical things about them, as they show themselves to simultaneously have a pride so strong and durable that nothing can scratch it, yet it also can present itself as something so frail and brittle that even a harsh phrase could tear them down. What they are prideful of is being a warrior, being capable of surviving for this long - even when the odds seemed stacked against them. However, it is with this pride that also comes with the fear of losing a battle - of not being worthy of calling themself a warrior. It is with this fear that leads to many of the insecurities that are so often deeply woven into the minds of Knights. Depending on their walk of life, as well as their Aspect, these fears and insecurities can vary greatly from Knight to Knight. Amongst all of them, though, there will always be one thread that runs through all of them. That thread is questioning if they are truly capable, or even worthy, of being able to handle the powers of their Aspect and use them as they properly should be. What all Knights fear the most is that of failure.

What the Knight must do in order to truly make progress in their journey is to learn that what is truly preventing them from fully embracing their Aspect is themself. They most certainly are equipped with their Aspect, but they can only use the bare minimum of its true potential and powers. A Knight’s Aspect will only ever allow itself to fully be used by the Knight once they have proven themself worthy and capable of wielding such a powerful thing. Much like the sword in the stone, if the Knight continues to fail in proving themself pure and capable enough to retrieve the fullest potential of their Aspect, then their journey will come to a stall and the Knight will never reach their fullest potential. The biggest thing the Knight must let go for this state of being and mind to be achieved is that the Knight must fully allow themself to be vulnerable to those in their life. The mask they have worn for years must come off, and the act they have been a part of must finally have the curtains called upon it. It is not the Knight themself trying to fully take hold of their Aspect, after all, but rather the lie that they created so as to shield and hide their true self away from the world. However, this is not an easy task for the Knight to do on their own, as Knights have often shown themselves to be prone towards streaks of stubbornness. If the Knight does not feel as though they are safe and supported enough to open up, then they just might never will. Those who call themselves friends, or perhaps even lovers, to the Knight must also prove themselves worthy to see the Knight at their purest, most true form of self. Because of this, once a Knight truly opens up about who they really are, and reveals to you all of their fears, insecurities, and scars from all their lost battles, it would be unwise to take such a trusting gesture for granted.

As mentioned before, the Knight is someone who will often find themself having somehow been brought to be the center of attention, no matter where they go. Because of this, they are often someone who manages to pick up and carry off quite a few allies and friends along their travels, with those people staying with the Knight for a multitude of reasons. While they may pick up a few bad and rotten apples along the way, it most likely will only appear to be another challenge brought on by their Aspect for the Knight. Even when a relationship does go sour, the Knight will often do what they do best and hide the pain that they may have endured from such an experience. For situations such as this, the Knight will sometimes go as far as to not tell anyone about this as they may fear it would prove to everyone else that the Knight is as held-together as they show themself to be. While some people may be frustrated by the secrets that the Knight seems to love keeping, others may find this mysterious air about them intoxicating, alluring, and/or simply fascinating. No matter what, though, there seems to be no doubt that Knights, no matter how emotionally distant or volatile they may seem to be, attract people who find them charming in one way or another. Out of most of the Classes, Knights prove themselves to be rather charismatic and/or charming in their own special and unique way - another reason why so many people seem to be drawn towards them. Even if the Knight’s facade may say otherwise, Knights are those who prove themselves to be more than willing to devote their mind, body, and heart to those they truly love out of many of the other Classes. Whether they scream/shout at, and belittle their loved ones, or play it off like they’re too cool to show affection in return, there is a part of the Knight that does truly, deeply care for and love those within their life. It all simply depends on the Knight in regards to how they show this love and affection.

It is through this love and devotion to their friends and allies that will help to push the Knight closer to being able to wield their Aspect. However, what the Knight needs is one final push, one final leap for them to finally cross that line in which they may finally take hold of their Aspect like that of a shield or sword. This final push is the Knight coming to terms that, for the longest time, all they needed was to believe in their own worth. Call it a fairy tale ending if you wish, but this is something that has been seen with many Knights. Their fear and insecurities have, for the longest time, plagued and clouded their vision for so long - long enough that they even became blind to the fact that they had been worthy of using and connecting with their Aspect for far too long. Once they manage to bust through such negative things, though, will they finally be able to take hold of their Aspect and do as they see fit with it. Finally, will the Knight rise and step forth to fulfill their duty as a protector.

Knights are those who actively protect their Aspect, or actively protect through it. By protecting their Aspect, it means that they are willing to use themself in order to try and preserve every last instance wherein their Aspect can occur. They protect it from being exploited, destroyed, manipulated, and more. Depending on who is within the Knight’s group, or what is occurring within the world of the Knight, this can prove to be a daunting and even exhausting task for the Knight. The shield is the best way for the Knight to equip their Aspect, if they so wish to protect it. However, depending on the Knight, they may only try to protect a select few instances of their Aspect, rather than trying to protect the entire thing. If these Knights are ones to fall in the ways of being selfish, then they will have no problem with only protecting their own personal instance of Aspect, as the rest of it falls away or becomes twisted and mangled beyond recognition. For the selfless Knights, though, they would do the opposite - allowing all other instances of their Aspect to be protected, while allowing for their own to be exploited and taken advantage of. Then there are the Knights who protect through their Aspect, wielding it far more like that of a sword so as to slice down any foes who threaten the Knight and perhaps their friends and allies, as well. Along with the sword, they’d be able to use their Aspect’s powers to their fullest ability if it meant protecting those they cared for and loved. Whether it be warping the fabric of reality to create that of a blackhole, cloaking themself or their team in shadows, or creating a wall of plants so thorny and thick that nothing could even bring a scratch upon it. Once again, this can lead to some Knights who are picky in terms of who deserves protection and who deserves to fight for themself. For some Knights, this can boil down to only protecting themself, or being willing to become a sacrifice for the betterment of the team. Then there are the Knights who may prove themselves capable of not wielding one over the other, but rather both the shield and sword at once or interchangeably. However, that is a discussion for another day.

Ultimately, the Knight is one where their job is to help protect their teammates, friends, lovers, and more, especially once they have proven themself worthy of wielding their Aspect. By taking on this position of responsibility, it will have meant that they are someone who welcomes the idea of failure instead of hiding away from it. They may have started their journey as someone they were not, afraid of being seen as weak and incapable of survival by their peers, but as long as they stuck to the path forged by themself and their Aspect, then they should have long since burst forth from their cocoons as the truly beautiful butterflies they are meant to be. While there are certainly moments down the line where the Knight may fall back into their old habits of facades and hiding, if they learned to keep the better company around them, then such people should be more than capable of giving reassurance and kindness to the Knight. Sometimes, all they need is a gentle reminder that they are worthy to have gotten as far as they have, and they are capable of surviving many more days ahead of them. The Knight is someone who puts great faith in the relationships they have, as well as putting a large part of themself within them. As such, it would be unwise as to harm and mess around with those who the Knight holds dear. While Knights may show themselves to be able to keep their cool most of the time, even the most level-headed of them have been shown to occasionally go off the rails. As much as Knights are protectors, they are just as willing to be true, unyielding, brutal warriors.

#Knight #Knight Class #Homestuck #Hiveswap #Knight Analysis #Noble November

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commanderbensolo · 4 years

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SFW Headcanons- Triplet Matt

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Matt is honestly the sweetest guy on Earth, and honestly his affection would be to the max all the time. Always hugging, kissing, and cuddling. He just likes to be close to you and show his appreciation for you in that way. Even when you first starting dated, he was very big on affection, which was a nice change to previous relationships which had started out slow.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Yours and Matt’s friendship started in a math class that you were taking as part of an extra credit course in college. You had all been assigned ‘buddies’ as the professor called it, which was basically just the person you were sat next to. Matty was nervous to talk to you at first, because he thought you were incredibly pretty, and also extremely intelligent once you started answering questions in class, but once you guys started talking all his nervousness melted away and you became fast friends. Matt is one of those best friends who you can always rely on to be there for you, either physically or emotionally, and that’s eventually what led to your relationship starting.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Matt loves to cuddle, but he especially loves it when you’re both lying down on the couch just watching tv. He likes to fall asleep with his arm round you, it makes him feel safe and loved.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Matt would love to settle down, but only if it was with the right person. He worries a lot about how people perceive him, and he’s been bullied by a couple of assholes in high school before he had his growth spurt, so when he’s in a relationship he worries a lot about small things. However, when he started dating you, he didn’t worry half as much as he did previously, and that made him think that he had finally found ‘the one’.

Matt loves to cook, but his speciality is baking. You wouldn’t expect it, but he can make a mean tiramisu.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

He would be very nervous before breaking up with his partner, simply because he doesn’t want to cause them pain. He’d probably pick you up to go out, but then talk to you in the car before you went anywhere so you still had the option to stay at home if you didn’t feel like going out with him as friends. He’s very considerate of his s/o’s feelings.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Like I said before, Matty is fine with commitment, but it has to be the right person. He wouldn’t be able to settle down just for the sake of it. He would want to get married about 1-2 ½ years after dating.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Matt is definitely the gentlest out of the triplets. That’s what makes him so awkward around people due to the fact that he’s shredded and absolutely huge, so people tend to view him as intense when in reality he’s one of the cutest, most awkward people alive. He’s very in touch with his emotions, and always listens to people when they have problems.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Matt fucking LOVES hugging you. It happens all the time. And you certainly don’t complain when a giant wall of warmth just decides to hug you from behind.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Matty was such a nervous bby when it came to saying how he felt. He desperately wanted to say it to you, but he didn’t want to come across as too intense or seem like he was moving too fast. So he actually said it when you both had ordered takeout and were just lying on the couch with your head on his chest. He leaned down to kiss your head and whispered “I love you” afterwards. Smiling into his chest, you lift your head up to place a peck on his lips, and to return the sentiment.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Matt doesn’t get jealous, he gets insecure. He knows that he’s not Mr Tall, Dark and Handsome like his brothers and there have definitely been some idiots who have impacted his self-esteem and how he feels about himself. So when a guy starts hitting on you when you’re out or on campus, he just sort of shrinks into himself. However, when he notices that the guy is on the floor clutching his crotch in pain, he looks at you with wide eyes, and just gives you a passionate kiss. He doesn’t understand how he got so lucky.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

,Matt’s kisses are sweet and soft all the time. He believes you deserve to be worshipped, and he will stop at nothing in order to ensure that happens. He likes to kiss you on your lips, forehead, neck and stomach, and he likes it when you kiss him heatedly on the lips or place soft, little kisses along his neck and collarbone.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Matt is wonderful around children. He loves them so much, and before he decided on a sort of technology-based career, he considered become a middle school teacher.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Most mornings with Matt are spent in class, since for the classes you’re in the professor likes to set early lectures at either 8 or 9 am, but on the days where you have no classes you both will just lie there in bed together and cuddle, enjoying the warmth and the day before it’s even started.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Matt gets tired at around 10pm, and the same goes for you unless you have a project or assignment due, so you usually tend to get into bed and fall asleep together around 11pm.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Once he knew he could trust you, he revealed most things to you at once. Things regarding his family or his past took a little longer, but he eventually opened up to you.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Matt only becomes angry if someone has lied to him or gone behind his back. He hates the feeling of being betrayed because it makes him feel worthless and like he’s not good enough.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He doesn’t remember every detail, but he remembers mostly everything about you that is important.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

His favourite moment in your relationship was your one year anniversary date. You had both stressed so much over it and how you both looked, but once you saw each other all the worries melted away, and the night was perfect without a hitch.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Matt prefers to be protected over being protective, but that’s only because he doesn’t like getting into fights. He may look like an intense guy, but in reality he’s a sweetheart who would rather just sort everything out diplomatically. Unless, of course, it involved you. Then you kinda felt sorry for the guy on the receiving end.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

This boy puts so much effort into everything it’s unreal, and one time it actually made you cry from joy.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He works too hard. You always tell him this, and that it’s okay to relax, but he doesn’t seem to listen to you.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Matt is probably the triplet who is most concerned about his looks, but that’s only because he’s in a professional environment 90% of the time and so it’s just hardwired into his brain now to wear a suit and tie.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Yes. There would be significant drop in his mood and his brothers would probably become genuinely concerned for him.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Matt can play piano and violin extremely well, and can also ballroom dance. He took lessons (which his mother forced him into, Han said it was a stupid idea but they did it anyway) from the ages of 8 till he was 17, at which he had to stop in order to focus on senior year in high school and college.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

I don’t think would like a partner who hasn’t got a good work ethic. He’s just too driven as a person.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?

Matt can usually sleep like a rock, but there are some nights where he just can’t sleep because of work or college. Usually on nights like this, you make a cup of hot cocoa for you both and just sit up with him so he can relax until he’s sleepy.

#matt the radar technician #triplet matt #solo triplets #fluff #sfw headcanons

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ocular-intercourse · 4 years

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@mangosandchili and number 3, teddy

🌲 What is the kindest thing your OC has ever done for someone? What is the kindest thing someone has ever done for them? On the flip side, what is the worst thing your OC has done to another person?

This question is hard to answer for Teddy for exactly the opposite reason that I had for Ace. Cause his base mode is being kind, oozing kindness all over the place to people deserving and undeserving, so it’s hard to pick something that stands out. The kindest thing he has done is probably allowing his brother to profit from his life experiences, writing books ‘about’ him, without getting anything from it. The kindest thing someone has done for him was his father’s wife accepting him into their family, raising him, though he was not her child. He is still very much in awe by her doing that. The worst thing he has done to people probably depends on who you ask or what you consider bad. Maybe it’s making his family worry that one time he tried to run away while they were on vacation. He has a homophobic grandmother he cut out of his life, she most definitely thinks he did something cruel to her, both by being gay, non-christian and avoiding her, telling her she is the bad one?? He himself would probably answer that killing someone, even in self-defense, was the worst thing he ever did. You can’t convince him otherwise.

🌳 What does your OC do when they see others upset or in pain? An upset friend? A stranger?

He is another one of those who will always help as best he can. With him that even extends to people he actively dislikes. He can’t help it. Ted is the emotional sponge of his friend group, the go-to for non-official therapy, he overextends himself and let’s people step over his boundaries more often than he should. To him seeing somebody else suffer feels very much like he’s suffering himself, he’s hyper empathic in some ways, so helping them feels like helping himself, cause he wouldn’t be able to stop thinking about it till it’s solved anyways.

🌿 What is something true about your OC that they refuse to admit about themselves? Is there any reason to this besides embarrassment?

It’s probably a form of refusing to admit it, more like refusing to see it, not actively I might add. If you’d ask people around him to put down some words to describe him and ask teddy to do the same, there’s one word that would appear a bunch of times on their list but never on his, it would be bossy. In his mind he’s this gentle submissive guy that more often than not gets walked over by others and pushed around.. it’s not really true though. Not always at least. It’s probably him trying to steer against not being taken seriously. He has no problem speaking out, putting his opinion out there, letting people know what he needs.. He would absolutely be embarrassed about being considered bossy, cause it fits into his self-image so little.

🍃 Describe a regular day for your OC. What is their schedule (if they have one).

He’s not a schedule kind of guy, more of a head-in-the-clouds let’s see what happens today kind of person. The only strict routine he has is about eating, as a tool of keeping tabs on his eating disorder. He’ll also try and spend as much time as he gets in nature or at least surrounded by plants, alternatively animals. There’s a massive greenhouse on the academy grounds and him and his siblings take care of the plants, if you ever try to find him it’s probably there. Before the attack you might have gone looking for him in the woods, but he’s been avoiding them ever since.

🍁 What is your OC’s most traumatic experience? (If they don’t have just one traumatic experience either pick one or describe them all!)

There’s some that come to mind. I have talked about the academy attack before, and how he had to fight and unwillingly kill. It’s definitely something he’s struggling with, especially since there’s not really a way to deal with it, in the real world, and not really a support system of sorts at the academy. The students are more or less left to deal with the aftermath alone, some guidance maybe from the teachers, but they are not equipped to handle something like that.

Another one is when it was revealed to him that he is a demi-god and his mother is not his biological mother. His whole world view turned upside down, he felt like a stranger in his family and like a constant source of pain for his mother. That’s when he tried to run away, since he was not one of them anyways, why not spare them the trouble of having him around. That’s part of what lead to him developing the eating disorder. He felt like he had no control over anything, but he could at least control very strictly what he ate and when he ate and that mostly made him forbid himself from eating entirely, for as long as he could get himself to, then binging, purging, repeating. His parents picked up on that quite fast and got him help though, but it’s still something that resurfaces a bit when he feels like things are out of control.

Something else that happened when he was absolutely too young for it, maybe 15, being the gay kid in school and bullied for it, getting the attention from one of his friend’s older brothers, starting to hang around with his friend group, going to parties, doing drugs, all under the cover of being accepted there and wanting to belong and seem cool, waking up drugged in positions he did not want to be in, touched by people he did not know, all somewhat orchestrated or at least permitted, tolerated, by said older brother. He got the fuck out of there before anything too bad could happen (as far as he remembers) and is very very thankful for having been lucky, conscious and responsive enough to be able to pull the breaks and protect himself. But it definitely put a spin on his ability to trust people for a long time, and made it hard for a while to come to terms with his identity cause if the only other interaction you had with gay people was /that/ it does not exactly make you want to belong to the community.

🍄 How would your OC react to the death of a friend/family member/loved one? Is there anyone they can confide in?

He would definitely be devastated. But he also has a very good support system, a lot of people around to catch him and lead him through his grief. It’s not out of the ordinary, something that happens to people in life, that is painful, but part of it. He tries to see it kinda holistically, it’s just part of the universe, neither good nor bad, and tries to focus on the joy of having known a person rather than the pain of losing them. He also holds on to the hope of seeing them again.

🌾 What would your OC be like if they were evil. Or if they’re already evil what would they be like as the good guy?

Evil Teddy is cliché eco-terrorist. If people have to die so the planet can survive then it’s justified to let them die, or even our mission to kill them ourselves. Picture James Bond villain Teddy. Bad guy with flair and ideals and a bigger picture plan.

💐 How would your OC react to somebody telling them that they love them? (+ bonus give another characters/OC name!)

Teddy is in love with love, romantically, platonically, he does not care, he loves people and he lets them know, constantly, which mostly inspires people to respond often. So it’s not irregular for him to hear his friends and family telling him that they love him. With Zeke that a whole other thing. Hearing it would make him extremely happy, cause he wants to be loves by Zeke. But since he tends to not show it in actions I think Teddy would, in the worst phases of this behavior, just react bitterly to being told ‘I love you’. Cause he just wouldn’t believe it. It would make it angry, even. If you love me than show it goddamit, what the fuck am I supposed to do with some hollow words..

🌷 What does your OC hate about themself? What lies about themself do they believe? On the flip side, What does your OC love about themself?

Teddy has been on a long journey of self-acceptance ever since he was litte. From learning to deal with his ancestry, to being bullied practically everywhere, to this very shitty introduction to dating, if you want to call it that, hating himself for being different. But he has always had his family and friends who helped him see what was right and what were wrong assumptions, he always had help working through his issues. He went to therapy early, since he developed his eating disorder. He just always had a really really good safety net, that made it possible for him to look at his problems and deal with them head-on. He loves himself; he loves that he is kind and gentle and loving and, well, good. There is honestly not a lot about himself that he would straight up hate. Maybe some things he’d like to change, but he always tries to see the positives even in them. What he definitely does hate though, is that his experience with Zeke is kinda starting to make him doubt again, to have to hide parts of himself that he fought very hard to be proud for. He hates that he let himself get caught in this regressive mindset, straight back to his insecure teens, all because he can’t stop himself from feeling these things for this boy who is not ready for them at all. He’s not entirely sure if he should be mad at himself, at Zeke or at the universe for this unfortunate timing. But that’s all part of the one thing he’d like to change about himself the most, being able to face injustices, especially those directed at himself, a little better. They often just make him hopeless and unable to act cause he does not know what to do, so he just does nothing instead.

🥀 What is something your OC blames themselves for and is it really their fault? Does it keep them up at night and is there any lingering trauma?

Mhmmm, again I think Teddy is not really the person to dwell on these negative things, at least not in regards to him. Like, yeah, he can’t quite deal with having killed a guy, he wished it would not have happened, but he can also see that in that situation there was not a lot of other things he could have done, it was a reaction, he did not mean to do it, but that was a bad guy that very much wanted to kill him and others, so he can see that is was justified somehow. So he suffers, for having done that, but he does not blame himself all that much, personally, cause it was out of his control. Maybe you will find him thinking about what could have gone differently here and there, but those moments are rare, cause he can’t do anything about it anyways. Things he feels guilty about are mostly related to his family, feeling like he burdened them with things one way or another. He can’t quite 100 % believe his mother really accepts him as hers, no hard feelings for his dad’s affair or one-night-stand or whatever, he feels bad about being a reminder of that, he feels undeserving of her love. He feels guilty about worrying others.

🌺 In what situation would your OC be pushed to commit an act of violence? Would they go as far to kill someone if they had to? How would this affect them and their relationships with others?

The answer is usually never. If you would put him in that same situation again, where he’s surrounded by bad guys and he just tries to keep them from being able to hurt anyone and one of them happens to die during that.. that’s not really something he chose to do. If he had known that it would happen he might have not intervened in the same way. He is a pacifist first, always. The attack made him reevaluate some things though, like the necessity of learning how to fight, if only to be able to act more controlled the next time, truly keeping everybody on both sides from dying unnecessarily. He’s the kind of person that wants to believe that everything can be solved by conversations, so he’d never see killing people as a solution. He would kill only if forced to, not by somebody holding a gun to his head and making him do it, but in a situation where the result of the other person not dying would be something he couldn’t live with.

Having killed somebody definitely made Teddy retreat a bit, he hardened a little, did not want people to see him go through that, be a different him. Eventually he did allow himself to share about it more, the easiest with his ex-nemesis who had been there when it happened and who went through the same shit.

Oh, actually, he is a bit more loose about physical violence that won’t leave permanent damage. He’d surprise people with it but he’d absolutely deck a guy in the face if he was being harmful to others.

🌸 What would your OC do if they were given god-like powers or the ability to change anything about the world for a whole day?

Teddy would try and figure out the best way to help as many people in the long run as possible. He would probably come to the conclusion that it would help if you made people understand other people’s struggles and experiences. Maybe a bit of a just dessert kind of solution. He’d put powerful assholes in the shoes of the people they suppress, hoping to make them understand even after that day and maybe change their stances, be nicer.

🌼 Describe one of your OC’s worst nightmares.

Losing hope in the world, in the inherent goodness that he believes in. He’s seen many people, even optimistic ones, become cynical and hopeless considering the state of things. And he understands their reactions, they are probably justified. But he himself just does not want to lose hope, he always wants to believe that people are good and the world is good, and things will end well. But understanding why others become pessimists is just one step too close to following in their footsteps. He refuses to let that happen, he wants to at least, but he is a little scared of failing to keep it up indefinitely, of being proven wrong.

🌻 What advice would your OC give to their younger self? What advice does your OC need now?

Be yourself always. If you feel bad about something it’s probably the right feeling to have. Trust your instincts. Only you can know what’s right for you, the opinions of others might sound nice but that does not make them true. Right now he could probably be reminded that there is strength in kindness and that the cost of it is worth it, always. Also somebody tell him to dump Zeke.

#ocs #teddy #mangosandchili

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teenwolf-rarepairs · 5 years

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For the ship ask: scott and Isaac

do they have a lot of arguments? if so, over what? They don’t argue a lot, but when they do is about their ways to approach a situation (Isaac usually being more aggresive and Scott sometimes a little bit too patient)

who apologizes first? in what way? is it hard for either of them to apologize? Isaac is usually the first one to apologize, not because Scott is too proud to do so, but because he really doesn’t like it when Scott is angry or upset because of him. Scott can’t really stay mad at him when he makes the puppy eyes thing.

which one has more insecurities? over what? Mostly Isaac. He still has a hard time trying to get over all the hurtful things his father constantly told him. He constantly worries about not being good enough, not deserving all the good things Mellissa and Scott have done for him, not deserving someone as amazing and kind as Scott. He can’t help it, but when it gets too bad Scott is there to reassure him.

who gets more riled up? do they show their anger? Isaac gets riled up faster, but they are careful with how they show their anger. Physical violence is off of the table. Scott knows he sometimes can be hurtful with his words when he’s really upset and Isaac can be cruel, so they really try to keep their words in check when they fight.

how do they hide their pain when they’re upset? do they try to hide their pain? Scott is not very good at hidding his (emotional) pain and neither is Isaac. They might try it once in a while, but the other will quickly pick up on their distress/sadness and do something about it.

who tries to make up first? does it work? Isaac does. He hates when they fight, and will approach Scott sooner than later. Though Scott sometimes beats him to it.

would they hate-fuck if they were mad at one another? if they had a falling out? Scott never liked the idea of hate-fucking someone, specially Isaac. He likes to make his partner happy, feel him happy, so he won’t try to have sex with him unless they’ve talked everything out. They do like their make up sex tho.

do they hold grudges? is it hard for them to let go/forgive each other? Not really. Scott doesn’t see the point in doing so, and though Isaac is prone to hold grudges, he knows Scott doesn’t hurt him on purpose, so he lets it go quickly enough.

is there something big that could potentially tear them apart if it was revealed? No. Neither of them have done anything bad enough to cause a fall out.

if something already happened to tear them apart, what would make them come back together? is it even possible? Well, Scott is very forgiving, so I think he would really try to understand his partner and the situation, and then he would try to fix everything. Isaac is more insecure and it could stop him for a while, but his feelings towards Scott would win the battle at the end.

what’s their favorite pass time when they’re upset? Scott just goes somewhere quiet and thinks. Isaac gets restless, so the only thing he can do to relax himself is go for a run.

who do they confide in when shit hits the fan (besides each other)? For Isaac is kind of difficult to trust someone like that, but he gets close to Malia and she becomes his confidant. Scott of course goes to Stiles, though he’s not always helpful, he listens and thats enough.

is it hard for them to talk about their feelings openly with each other? if so, is there any way that can be resolved, even in the slightest? It’s a little bit hard for Isaac at the beginning, but he feels really comfortable around Scott and knows he won’t judge him. Scott wears his heart on his sleeve, and when it comes to Isaac it’s even a little easier to tell him how he feels.

who grieves more when the other is away? Isaac. Man, he hates when Scott is away and he also hates that he feels clingy, but he can’t help it. He doesn’t connect with people like he did with Scott that often.

who misses the other more, or really thinks about them more? They both do, a lot.

do either of them have a special item (an article of clothing, a necklace, a book) that they use when they miss the other? if so, what is it? what do they do with it (read, wear, look at, smell)? They both like to wear each other’s clothes, but since Isaac is taller than Scott, he prefers taking one of his shirts or a hoodie and sleeps with it tucked under his pillow.

who cries more? who gets more emotional in general? They’re both kind of emotional, but Isaac the most. He feels safe enough with Scott to show that soft side of him.

do either of them have the other’s stuff lying around their house? Isaac’s stuff are all over Scott’s house. Even when he moves out, he leaves clothes, books and other things behind. Scott moves them into his room.

how about teasing? do they tease each other while in a fight (whether it be with themselves or just general teasing)? They don’t like at all when the other is upset, so they won’t tease each other about it.

do either of them have any vices? Nope, though Isaac had a time when he always had skittles on him.

what’s the thing they miss most about each other? Isaac misses how safe and secure Scott makes him feel. Scott really misses how warm Isaac makes him feel inside, like he could do anything.

what’s their go-to breakup/angst song? Someone you loved - Lewis Capaldi

who’s more jealous? Isaac, because Scott is way too friendly and almost never notices when someone is flirting with him.

who is the first to forgive? Scott. He doesn’t see the point in holding onto grudges and things that hurt him.

what’s the one deal breaker for either of them (lack of communication, fear of commitment, etc)? Isaac’s insecurities sometimes get the best of him and it strains his relationship with Scott.

who would take longer to let go? do they ever really “let go”? When Scott really falls in love, he falls deeply, head over heels, so it’s way harder for him to get over a breakup. Isaac on the other hand is very similar, but maybe would convince himself that it was for the best and he’ll force himself to move on.

which is more afraid of confrontation? Isaac. He has a lot of childhood traumas regarding confrontations with people he loves (his dad), so yeah. He’ll avoid them like the plague.

who’s the first to distance themselves (if either)? Scott, but not because he wants to push Isaac away. He just needs a quiet moment to think and cool off, before he can do anything.

who’s more patient? is it hard to break that patience? Scott is more patient, and yes, is hard to break that patience but is not impossible. Sometimes Isaac gets very difficult and Scott snaps.

who’s the first to blame themselves? Both of them, but Isaac is really self-deprecating.

who’s more likely to do something out of spite? Isaac, even if he knows he’ll regret it later.

who would be the first to say they hate the other? would they mean it? Neither of them would say that, not even as a joke, really.

who worries more? Both of them.

what scent reminds them of the other? Scott smells like coffee and cinnamon for Isaac, and Isaac smells like lemon balm and Scott loves it.

do they have any regrets (regarding the other, or just in general)? They do have regrets regarding a lot of stuff, but not each other.

who’s quicker to walk away if a situation gets heated? Isaac. He hates confrontations, so if a fight gets heated he’ll walk away until he thinks is safe to come back.

who is more prone to anger? Isaac.

who cries more in an argument? do either of them cry? Neither of them cries, but if it gets really bad, Isaac might tear up and Scott will immediately stop.

does it take a lot for it to get to the point of yelling? Yes, though Isaac sometimes rises his voice a little bit, they don’t yell at each other.

who sleeps on the couch? can either of them sleep without the other? If they had a pretty bad argument, Scott is the one to willingly take the couch, but it doesn’t last long. Either Isaac will call him back to the room or he’ll sleep in the couch too, on top of Scott.

who’s more likely to protect the other? They both are, equally.

if one of them gets injured, who worries more? Isaac worries a little bit more because Scott has a tendency to sabotage his own healing when there’s a particular situation, so yeah, he fusses a lot.

who would be more afraid of the other’s death/harm? Isaac is utterly terrified of that possibility. He has lost his whole family and got a new one he really intends to keep safe.

who ends up yelling first? are they always yelling when arguing, or do neither of them yell at all? They don’t yell at all. They might rise their voices a little bit here and there, but it never goes further than that.

who would be more likely to save who? Isaac is more likely to save Scott, because Scott has like zero regard of his own well being and will sacrifice himself if necessary.

who stays up at night brooding? Isaac.

who has more dreams/nightmares about the other? Both of them have a lot of nightmares, but not about each other.

who comforts who after a bad dream/event? They comfort each other.

do they think about each other a lot? does it affect their performance/schoolwork? Yeah, they think about each other a lot and sometimes Scott gets distracted by that. Isaac is more careful about it.

if one of them were to come back after a long time, who would come to who? would it go well? would the other person take them back? Well, Isaac is the one who comes back after a long time. It’s awkward for them at first, not knowing where they’re standing with each other, but after a couple of days they come around and talk about the situation. Scott does take him back, but they go slow.

#scisaac #scott x isaac #ship meme #ship ask #teen wolf

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imitationpersonne · 5 years

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Monoma Neito at His Worst: Maladaptive Narcissistic Tendencies

[Descriptions collected from various sources.]

Summary

Charming or abusive, seductive or abandoning, the narcissist fears himself most. Surrounded by terrors that reside within and seem impossible to be tempered or resolved, the narcissist is haunted by fears of his own unworthiness, and at all cost he seeks to avoid them by wearing a face of invulnerability, superiority, perfection. He protects his false face at the expense of anyone who is within his power of influence. The narcissist despises himself and feels so devoid of value that everyone around him either represents a threat of emotional injury or potential leverage for his ego—either through winning their esteem or asserting his superiority over them.

The narcissist is grabbing at what he didn’t get enough of from his caretakers at a crucially formative time of life—validation of self. Like anyone compensating for deprivation, he tries to fill the void. But the narcissist is drinking from a cup without a bottom, looking to others to fill and refill it only to end up empty. No one can give him what he needs, because he struggles to see anyone but himself. Without a childhood ‘redo,’ his search for self in others’ eyes only shows him his own empty eyes reflected back.

[Up next: Paradoxes, Fears, Struggles, Head Games]

Paradoxes

Angry at the world and yet utterly dependent on other people for psycho-emotional sustenance.

Constantly seeks attention and admiration but often self-sabotages by being rude, haughty, or attacking.

Extraordinarily vulnerable to shame and rejection but readily humiliates and rebuffs others.

Attacks and manipulates others and simultaneously projects his own abusive behavior onto them.

Continuously claims credit while deflecting all accountability.

Expert at detecting and exploiting others’ desires and vulnerabilities but blind to his own inner workings.

Fears

Being seen. While emotionally healthy people want to be truly ‘seen’ by others and seek partners who are able to give them that recognition of self, the narcissist is in deep hiding. Although the narcissist thrives on attention (good or bad), everything he does is in service to protecting his mask, a false self that he wears to hide the shameful black hole within.

Being humiliated. To assert his superiority, the narcissist compulsively competes with others, often to the point of absurdity. In his game of one-upmanship, he continuously strives to outshine, embarrass, and denigrate his opposition. Humiliation represents public vulnerability, which profoundly threatens the narcissist’s precious false self. Being at once hypersensitive and grandiose, the narcissist is enraged by even small, meaningless ‘slights’ that others would easily brush off. For the narcissist, even a hint at humiliation is a devastatingly shameful cause for vicious retaliation, including rage, belittlement, mockery, and a host of other punishments.

Being rejected. Narcissists regard any kind of rejection—personal, social, or professional—as intensely invalidating. Rejection reveals that which he works each day to hide—his sense of inferiority and unlovability. While a healthy person will pick himself up and try again after rejection, the narcissist will resort to all means of contorted rationalizing, hoovering (pulling others back in), and bitter reprisal. Typically, the narcissist stages his life to play the rejecting role, and he attunes himself to rebuff and discard others before they walk away from him first. But if rejected, a narcissist will utilize all his tactics, from guilt trips, to grand promises and seductions, to power maneuvers, to threats and revenge.

Struggles

Taking responsibility. Because he has built his identity against fundamental feelings of invalidation, he is intensely sensitive to shame and blame. Responsibility of any kind triggers the narcissist’s threat of exposure to criticism. The narcissist is so averse to responsibility, he systematically stages his life to avoid it and becomes masterful at denying and projecting it onto others.

Self-reflection. Narcissists are terrified of their own shadows—the long-hidden child within who was irreparably damaged and whose feelings of inadequacy he constantly overcompensates for. For the narcissist, self-reflection is dangerous territory to be avoided at all costs because it represents unbearable vulnerability. This is why narcissists rarely seek therapy, avoid honest communication, refuse accountability, and readily resort to defensive outbursts to blunt the truth.

Forgiveness. To the narcissist, everyone represents a potential threat to be defeated, and he is hyper-vigilant to perceived or (more rarely) real attack. Life is a battle zone, and he is always fighting for his survival. Narcissists regard any kind of hurt as cause for retaliation and revenge. Genuine forgiveness is not a function that comes naturally, fundamentally because the narcissist cannot forgive himself.

Expressing his real feelings. The narcissist thrives above all on attention, and there is no more fascinating topic than himself. He loves to dominate a room, asserting his superiority and awing others with his intellectual prowess. But when it comes to his feelings, the narcissist hides, from others and from himself. Narcissists lack the self-awareness to understand the underlying feelings that drive their behavior as well as the courage to make themselves vulnerable enough to share those feelings. He operates competitively on raw survivalist instinct and is a stranger to his innermost emotional realm.

Head Games

Cognitive dissonance. The narcissist’s manufactured reality is built on lies and denial, and he expects others within his sphere of influence to accept his version of the truth. What this means for these others is that they find themselves in ‘opposite land,’ where the narcissist tells them (usually through a range of manipulative tactics) that ‘reality’ is different from or even the opposite of what they feel and perceive. He produces a cognitive dissonance in which the other person experiences a profoundly disorienting gap between what s/he perceives and what the narcissist says happened—black is white, good is bad, false is true.

Gaslighting. This is a form of psychological abuse in which the narcissist systematically undermines another person’s mental state by leading them to question their perceptions of reality. The narcissist uses lies and false information to erode his victim’s belief in their own judgment and, ultimately, their sanity. After an abusive incident, the narcissist refuses responsibility, blames you, or outright denies that the abuse took place. He may say things like, “That’s not what happened,” “You’re crazy,” or “You made me do it.”

Hoovering. Since a narcissist’s behavior can be self-centered and often cruel, they tend to make those around them miserable and eventually drive many people away. If a source of emotional supply pulls away or tries to go ‘no contact,’ the narcissist typically attempts to hoover (as in vacuum-suck) them back within his realm of control. He will try to hoover through a variety of means, from promising to reform his behavior, to acting unusually solicitous, to dangling carrots such as gifts or money. However, if he finds adequate sources of new supply, he may simply walk away from old ones.

Projecting. One of the narcissist’s go-to manipulations is projection, whereby he beams his words, actions, traits, and motives back onto others. If he lied, you are the liar; if he is childish, you are immature; if he insulted you, you are critical; if he demanded reassurance, you are insecure. Through projection, the narcissist blames the victim and denies accountability. It is up for debate as to whether narcissists project consciously or unconsciously, but they do it with impeccable aim.

Shame. Narcissists are expert at projecting their own negative emotions onto others. Sadly, shame is a foundational emotion of the narcissist, probably stemming from childhood feelings of personal failure. In a primitive attempt to avoid feelings of shame and to elevate themselves, they routinely shame others.

Smear Campaign. Narcissists engage in smear campaigns to discredit others within their social sphere. A narcissist may smear another person because that person sees through his mask, he is trying to preemptively conceal his own abuse of that person, or he is taking revenge because the person offended or rejected him. He may conduct a smear campaign for lesser reasons, such as jealousy or resentment. Narcissists are quite calculating in their process of discrediting and socially isolating their target, using innuendo, gossip, and outright lies to family, friends, neighbors, and community members.

#from my old blog smallforone #headcanons #hc: psychology #cw: mental illness #cw: narcissism #Note these are his worst behaviors and not his entire repertoire #And everything manifests in varying levels of degrees of severity

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once-upon-a-ouat · 6 years

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OUAT Rewatch 1x15 “Red-handed”

The writers decided to make a masterpiece and we caught them red-handed (I should really stop this). To differ from my pun, the episode was just awesome and provided the same engaging experience as the first time I watched it. It was actually better this time around because with the knowledge of how the story plays out, you can see all the hints you missed on your first watch.

Red is such an awesome character and we see her go through so many phases (not of the moon though) in just one episode. Her romance with Peter was super adorable and the tragic end of it was just as jarring as the first time if not even more now that we know how much it affected Red. I loved how the writers misled us by making Peter say that he’d huff and puff, alluding that he’s the wolf, all so that the twist at the end could hit us even stronger. The fact that Granny was against their romance didn’t upset me as much as the first time because she had her reasons. Besides, without obstacles coming between them, we never would’ve seen to what lengths they were ready to go for each other. I loved how “I’d do anything for you” was their “I will always find you”. The playful banter between the two was also adorable to watch. But they showed that they were serious in their feelings when they faced difficulty (a.k.a thinking that Peter was the wolf). Their romance had solid foundation and was properly established which made it believable.

I absolutely loved the friendship between Red and Snow. It developed quickly but naturally and never came off as unbelievable. That first scene between them also revealed more of Red’s character. Her kindness and readiness to help a stranger make you love her immediately. I loved the fake name Snow chose for herself. That was very cool and it actually makes sense for the Curse to give them names that they would pick for themselves. Anyway, back to one of the cutest friendships this show has to offer, I just loved the girl talk between them. It was cool to see that even amidst all the chaos of the hostile world they live in, they still find time to be just girls. I think that was very important and, seeing how later on the show the characters often didn’t have time to be just humans because they were busy saving the town from impending doom every other day, I’m glad we got to see it. I loved Snow and Red’s determination to hunt down the wolf even though they were both scared of it. The trust that was built between the two so quickly was simply heartwarming and it justified Snow’s decision to go with Red.

I loved Granny in the flashback although she really made a wrong choice. There’s that fierce vibe to her that I just can’t help but love. She’s a strong-willed no-nonsense survivor and I really admire that. I also absolutely loved that she acknowledged the fact that her wrong choice had cost many lives. You rarely see the heroes own up to the mistakes they’ve made (but that rant will come into portions as we keep going with this rewatch). I found the lore in this episode particularly interesting and I also didn’t find any holes in it. There was a backstory inside the backstory but I think it actually worked quite well. Granny’s story didn’t deter the villagers from going after the wolf though. I can’t help but wonder how come none of the villagers have thought of Red’s idea – to go after the wolf in the daytime? Not that they would’ve found anything but still. I’m also curious as to how the marriage between Granny and Red’s grandfather worked out. It is heavily implied here that Granny hates the whole werewolf thing so I don’t imagine she was very fond of her husband which could give some insight into the person that she’s become. Also, could she control the wolf? In 2x07 Anita told Red that if you tried to fight the wolf, it would take over. I don’t really think Granny was too terribly happy with being a werewolf and I would bet my money on her fighting it every time and therefore losing control. I have more thoughts on this that are quickly morphing into a fanfiction idea but this paragraph is already long as hell so I’ll just leave it off here. One last question though – how did Granny explain Red’s absence to the villagers (and yes, I realize that is not of great importance; I’m just curious)?

I really enjoyed Ruby and Granny’s relationship in Storybrooke. The tension really escalated during that first scene between them but you have to admit that the sass was hella amusing (August’s face at Ruby’s comment about Norman Bates tho). I feel for Granny because Ruby’s outburst really hurt her but I also admire Ruby for having the courage to leave. Especially after it was revealed that she didn’t think she could do anything. Leaving is hard enough, but leaving when you’re full of insecurities and don’t believe in yourself is even harder. And we saw that they were both unhappy with the changes but neither of them wanted to admit it. That last scene between them was adorable but I’ll talk about it later.

Ruby’s journey of finding herself and overcoming her insecurities was really inspiring to watch. What I loved about it was that it didn’t come to a solid end because these journeys are never actually over for any of us. The doubts are present throughout our whole lives and being able to overcome them is what makes humans such fascinating beings. I loved that Emma was a part of Ruby’s journey (especially having in mind her reaction when Mary Margaret offered Ruby a place to stay). She helped her and it was nice to return to the idea of her being the Savior (‘cause she hasn’t done much saving in those past few episodes).

I really didn’t like the ‘well-deserved’ part of Emma’s comment and maybe she was trying to prepare Mary Margaret for what was about to come but I still didn’t like it. In this episode Emma interacted more with David but there still isn’t a relationship established between them and that annoys me a little bit. But on the other hand, it kinda makes sense because Snow was essentially the one to make the decision to put Emma in the wardrobe. David wanted them to keep her but she convinced him to take Emma to the wardrobe. So their relationship serves both as a way to make up for it and as a punishment because her daughter is right there with her but she doesn’t know it. The more you think about it, the more fucked up and terrifying the Curse becomes. Btw, there’s no way Regina didn’t know that Emma and Henry were spending time together. Even if they thought they were being sneaky.

David’s ‘condition’ kind of came out of nowhere. After he woke up from his coma, he ‘blacked out’ because he didn’t have cursed memories and he was intuitively searching for Snow. But now that he’s got his cursed memories that doesn’t really make sense to me. I don’t remember if they gave any further explanation of that so I’m not gonna put it in the plot holes column just yet.

What was Mary Margaret doing at the town line? She looked surprised and a bit startled to find David there which leaves us with no explanation as to what she was actually doing out there. Or did I miss something? It was cute that she believed in him and that he hadn’t done anything wrong but it was also heartbreaking because you know he’s not going to do the same. Once again and a bit in advance - dammit, David!

That twist in the end though. But I have some questions regarding that. When did Regina steal Mary Margaret’s jewelry box? Because if she stole it, say, the previous day, Mary Margaret should’ve noticed it was missing. That doesn’t really matter that much though. What I’m more interested in is where Regina got the human heart from if there were no other missing people. It can’t have been from her vault because those hearts are all glowy and enchanted, y’know. So where did she find a human heart?

Favorite scene: Ruby and Granny’s reconciliation. It was such a moving scene and it was great to see them working it out. And the whole fight was kind of triggered by a misunderstanding. But they both explained where they were coming from and the problem was resolved. I loved how Ruby admitted that she admired her grandmother and was afraid that she couldn’t be like her. And the “Proud of you”. It melted my heart. On a side note, how does Granny think she got that scar? In 1x07 Gold said there were no wolves in Storybrooke, so...?

Least favorite scene: The scene in the hospital. The whole explanation for David’s condition didn’t really make sense to me. Regina came barging in and started behaving in the cringiest way possible. It was the worst scene of the episode in my opinion.

Favorite line: “Well, I am [scared], but it’s okay. I can do it anyway. I sort of found someone in myself that was more than I expected.” - Ruby to Granny

Least favorite line: Okay, not a line, but I didn’t really like the look David gave Mary Margaret at the end of the episode.

I absolutely loved this episode. The last ten minutes you just watch and cry. The story was awesome but also very creepy and I loved both the twist in the past and that in the present. I honestly loved the horror vibe of the episode. I remember watching it for the first time and thinking “Holy shit! Don’t tell me there’s a human heart in that box... FUCK!”. I think Megan Ory’s performance was incredible. The soundtrack was once again amazing. This is definitely one of my favorite episodes of the whole show and one of my favorite twists. I can’t wait to see how dark the next episode will be.

P.S. I have a name day today and I’ve decided to celebrate by watching two episodes. So there's another review coming from me today.

#ouat rewatch #once upon a time #ouat #sea #1x15 #red-handed #operation end

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fusrodie · 7 years

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1~ 5 sal, 20~28 Kieran, 34 ~37 Evan.

So this one is… Very, very old. I’m sorry it took me so long to answer!

Get to know my character

for Sal:

01. What does your character’s name mean? Did you pick it for the symbolism, or did you just like the way it sounded?

Bruno means “brown”, Salvador means “savior”. I don’t exactly like the way it sounds, but I wanted a character whose nickname was Sal, then came the idea of making him Brazilian. I was between either Pablo or Bruno at this point, and Bruno sounds far more like a tupiniquim name. Not to mention, someone I admire greatly is called Bruno, too. Bonus that his name means “brown savior”. I mean look at him. *finger guns*

02. What is one of your character’s biggest insecurities? Are they able to hide it easily or can others easily exploit this weakness?

His appearance, though it’s actually both his biggest insecurity and his shield. While he doesn’t exactly stand out in the wasteland, pre-war Bruno was pretty far from the norm. Tattoos, jewelry, weird haircut, black clothes. He didn’t follow that style to stand out, not exactly, but it ended up becoming his weapon to fight against people’s mean comments and his ever present fear of not fitting in.

03. What would be their favorite physical trait about themselves?

His hair! He absolutely loves his hair, and this goes for both Companion!Sal and Sole Survivor!Sal. It’s a warm black, wavy, and it looks absolutely amazing because he takes such good care of it.

04. What are their favorite traits about their lover? (one psychological and one physical)

Sal doesn’t have a lover in his canon playthrough, but I can talk about Debra, his wife. Physically, he loved her eyes and always said they were very expressive. But he also loved her confidence and determination, and her will to help others, all things he’s never really possessed.

As for AU pairings, there is @trashofthewasteland Michelle - and to be quite honest, he loves everything about her. But physically, I think it’d be how petite she is. It was never something he noticed on women before, particularly because he tends to prefer women who are taller and stronger than him and look like they could kick his ass. It’s strange - the good kind - that despite her being so different from what he’d always admired, he thinks his tiny boss is sublime. He also loves her hands. Don’t ask me why, he just does. Personality wise, he loves that she is genuinely a good person. She seems to have all the kindness in the world inside her heart and he couldn’t do that if he tried.

Bonus Leilani: he finds Lani an absolutely fascinating person to begin with. He feels like he’s finally found someone who understands what he means when he says he thinks in colors. And that’s comforting even though he never thought he’d want to be understood on that regard. He also loves her calm demeanor. Physically? Her eyes. He could stare all night if she’d let him. And her hair.

05. Are they sexually confident or more of the shy type?

A bit of both? He doesn’t have the highest sex drive, so actively looking for sex isn’t happening often unless he’s in a steady relationship. He’s not the sort to look for one night stands. In the rare occasion that he does, he’s not ashamed of it, much less after the initial, possibly awkward stage has passed and it’s time to get down to business. He might get shy at first if it’s someone he really likes/admires, because he doesn’t want to screw things up. He wants things to be special, so he’ll be extra careful.

for Kieran:

20. Does your character like animals? What are some of their favorite animals? Would they want pets? What about mythological creatures?

Yes. Let me repeat that: yes. Kieran will tell you he was practically raised by a goat, and it’s true. Don’t ask me how goats survived in post-apocalyptic United States, but I’m calling it now, they survived, and Kieran’s family had a pet one. Her name was Myrtle. But farm animals were the only animals he had around growing up, dogs and cats not being very common in his village. Regardless, he loves all animals, though maybe not deathclaws or things that are bigger than him and have scales.

Radstags are his favorite, and he won’t kill a radstag if he has a choice. They are too adorable for that. He wants to have a pet radstag one day, but for now, he has D’Artagnan, a Maine Coon Cat. Sometimes they hunt together, go hiking together, and D’Artagnan is a big part of the reason why he lives so secluded - he wouldn’t forgive himself if anything happened to that cat. So he’d rather live far from people and somewhere D’Artagnan could hide if faced with danger and Kieran isn’t nearby.21. What is one of your character’s biggest fears? How would they react when dealing with this fear?

He’s afraid of tight/closed spaces, and ferals. That’s about it. Ferals he deals with easily enough - an arrow or a bullet, problem solved. Traps places and does his best to avoid them. The one time he got caught, he went into panic mode and doesn’t remember anything that happened after the first shot. Just remembers being back home, tending his wounds, with a lot of blood on his hands.

Regarding interiors/his claustrophobia, he just doesn’t go anywhere that looks cramped and doesn’t have a lot of windows unless he has company. Doesn’t matter if he knows there are things he needs inside. He just won’t go in.

22. What kind of tattoos, piercings, birthmarks, freckles, and other such unique physical features do they have?

I haven’t exactly decided on this, but in Skyrim, Kieran has a tattoo he got during his rite of passage with the Skaal - half a sleeve on his left arm. If he has a similar one in Fallout, I don’t know yet. But if there are two things Kieran has aplenty, it’s freckles and scars. You’ll find freckles all over his body, but it’s nowhere near Brandon’s level, for example. They’re mostly on his face and shoulders. As for scars, he has three claw marks on his face from a yao guai attack, claw marks on his back from a feral attack, bullet scars near his shoulder, and also one right between his right thigh and buttock. He got shot in the ass once. He has a bite mark on his ribs (mole rat, he can’t remember how it happened), and a half-moon shaped scar that begins just under his ribs on the left side, and goes down towards his crotch, that he got when he was with the raider gang. He seduced someone he shouldn’t have and they got a little, tiny bit angry when it became clear he didn’t want sex. They ran out of blade before they could do more damage, and he considers himself fairly lucky for it.

23. What is your character like when it comes to school? What subjects are they good/bad at? Do they get in trouble a lot or are well behaved?

Kieran never went to school, and while he did have people to teach him things, for the most part he didn’t want to learn. He was taught how to read and write, but didn’t learn out of stubbornness and a lack of discipline from his parents. He’d be good with science, though. Maybe philosophy. Wouldn’t do his homework, but wouldn’t misbehave.

24. In their own words, how would your character describe what their lover is like?

Fair warning, you would have a hard time getting Kieran to stop talking about them.

He wouldn’t shut up about how determined @njadastonearm Toni is - and how strong willed, and clever, and brave, and beautiful. I don’t think he’d ever vocalize it without some serious preparation beforehand, but she inspires him to try and do something out of his life. Here’s a woman that left her past behind, found herself a goal and went after it. That’s something he never had the courage to do, because he never managed to move on and still dwells in the past. Toni might be scared her past will catch up with her, yes, but she’s never let it stop her. He did. Being with her helps him learn a lot on how to do what he wants to do, rather than what he feels like he should be doing.

As for @mininuked Ahn - he sees that woman as a fucking goddess. A goddess of war, because he thinks she’s so goddamn badass. They butt heads sometimes, they learn together how to talk about their feelings, but there’s something about her that makes him feel like it’ll be worth all the trouble. She makes him want to try and that’s something no one had ever managed before. He feels like she gets him - they have the same interests, hobbies, they even have some of the same problems. She doesn’t have the answers, but it’s comforting to have someone to share the journey with. He’s used to being the rock for everyone - the one safe, solid thing people can count on. But with Ahn, for once he feels like he has someone strong and solid to support him.

25. Is there something traumatic from your character’s past that greatly affects them even to this day?

Losing his sister. He never talks about it openly, and has never told anyone his side of the story. If pressed, he will actually give you his father’s, and consequently his village’s take on it: he sold out. His sister’s boyfriend found out about it. Kieran killed them both and dumped the bodies somewhere snowy and dark so they wouldn’t be found. Feral ghouls attacked him when he went back to check on the bodies for whatever reason.

The truth is quite a bit different: Saoirse’s boyfriend got in with a gang from Quebec - the same gang Kieran would ultimately join. His ticket in would be selling out the village, and the raiders promised they’d just rob them all blind but leave everyone alive. Kieran happened to witness a conversation in which said boyfriend revealed his plans - but after that, he has no idea what happened. He notices the two have disappeared one early morning and tracks them, only to find their bodies dumped in the aforementioned snowy, dark place, half buried and half eaten. He is then attacked by ferals who almost kill him. He reports back as quickly as he can, and is accused by his father of having killed his sister to take her place as the next village leader. Given he had some shady dealings with traders from nearby settlements, his reputation with his people wasn’t stellar at the time. Having someone as important as his father blaming him made it worse. He never tried to tell his version - he simply accepted his exile and left his family behind.

He still has nightmares with feral ghouls, and even though she was already dead when he got there, he swears he can hear Saoirse screaming sometimes. He feels like their deaths were his responsibility, and never forgave himself for it. This is why he lives in seclusion and, despite being a sociable, friendly man who loves talking to people, punishes himself by staying as far away as he can and never truly making friends.26. What is their lover like sexually? How do they feel about their lover’s quirks, needs, etc?

I’m going to give more of a generic answer here because Kieran is a curious creature. He doesn’t know himself well, sexually in particular. Practically speaking, this means he will always put his partner first, and rarely stops to consider what he actually likes. That “I’m so used to giving and now I finally get to receive” meme? Kieran, only until his love interests (Toni, Ahn) came along he’d never had anyone care about his pleasure. Not even himself. So whatever his lovers want, he will accommodate and do what it takes to please them. It’s important to note that he does it because he likes to, though. He’s not putting up with anything, he is just a genuinely accepting person who respects people and tries his best to make them happy.

27. If your character was going to get arrested, what would be the most likely reason for it?

I have a hard time imagining Kieran getting arrested. Brandon? Hell, even Evangeline, but not Kieran. The only way he’d get arrested is if a) someone truly manages to piss him off enough for him to beat them up, or b) if a friend he really likes does something stupid and he plays along.

28. If your character became a celebrity, what would they be famous for?

Realistically, I’d say his looks. But if he had a say in it, he’d like to become famous for his cooking. Cooking show shot in a cabin in the middle of nowhere. Treats his guests like Gordon Ramsay treats children. A delight, really.

for Evan:

34. Does your character have favorite foods? (breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, snacks, etc)

Pre-war, Evangeline is addicted to baked sweets (cookies, cakes, pies) and noodles. Post-war, she refuses to eat anything pre-war for fear of getting seriously sick, but will cave if offered Sugar Bombs. She is also a big fan of mutfruit. Preston introduces her to mirelurk meat - and she loves it. She hates mirelurks, got seriously injured by one at some point; so eating the flesh of her enemies gives her a strange sense of accomplishment. Veni, vidi, vici, motherfucker.

35. Is your character afraid of death? If they got to choose how to die, how would they want to go?

She is and then she is not. She hates the idea of her death being meaningless, something stupid or unimportant. Because she gives it her all to try and make a difference, so if her death just slipped under everybody’s radar, that means she hasn’t done enough. There will come a time, though, when she will be satisfied with the work she’s done in the Commonwealth. Then it will stop having such a meaning - and her fearing death will be because she doesn’t want to let go of the life she’s managed to build for herself.36. Does your character have any medical conditions? Are they serious or minor? Do they affect their day to day life?

Not exactly. Sometimes her left hand hurts a lot, because she once managed to stick a needle inside it while sewing. Other than that, she managed to stay perfectly healthy even after leaving the vault. Somehow.

37. What are some of your character’s pet peeves? What are some things that annoy them or disgust them?

She… Really likes to color code things. It annoys her a lot to see things being organized with no obvious pattern to it.

#oc talk #sal sinclair #kieran murray #evangeline pierce #thank you and i'm sorry again #uglehcat

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teenwolf-rarepairs · 5 years

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Indulge me with dallison

ddo they have a lot of arguments? if so, over what? They argue and headbutt a lot, though with time it’s with less frequency.

who apologizes first? in what way? is it hard for either of them to apologize? It varies from time to time. They’re not usually vocal about it, so they apologize silently, by sitting near the other, with small touches, until the tension between them recedes and that’s it. If it’s a really bad fight, then one of them might actually say they’re sorry.

which one has more insecurities? over what? Derek is very insecure, not about himself, but about their relationship. He’s constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. Allison knows it, and though she doesn’t like it she understands and tries to reassure him with her actions.

who gets more riled up? do they show their anger? They both get riled up fast, and they’re also very vocal about their anger. They say hurtful things that they know will regret later, but they don’t mean them (not all of them, at least).

how do they hide their pain when they’re upset? do they try to hide their pain? They’re both stubborn and their pride gets in the way, so yeah, they try to hide their pain. Allison acts somewhat mean towards him, and he acts aloof and cold until something gives out.

who tries to make up first? does it work? It depends on who started the argument, or who was meaner to the other. If it’s Allison she knows better than to leave Derek alone with his thoughts, so usually she’s quicker to try and make up. Derek on the other hand knows better than to try and apologize when she’s angry, so it takes more time that way. And sometimes it takes more than one try.

would they hate-fuck if they were mad at one another? if they had a falling out? Before they get in a relationship, hate-fucking is how they blow steam off. But once feelings get involved, they don’t do it anymore since it reminds Derek of Kate.

do they hold grudges? is it hard for them to let go/forgive each other? Yes, it’s hard for them to learn how to forgive each other. They’re both prone to hold onto grudges for a long time, so they have to actively work on letting go.

is there something big that could potentially tear them apart if it was revealed? Not really. They got together after all the terrible sh*t happened, they’ve already seen the worst of each other, so there’s nothing that cuould be revealed bad enough to shake them up.

if something already happened to tear them apart, what would make them come back together? is it even possible? It would depend on what happened. I don’t think it would be impossible, but it certainly would be very difficult, for sure.

what’s their favorite pass time when they’re upset? Allison trains until she’s too exhausted to even think. Derek does something similar, working out until he tires himself, or occasionally reads the odd novel.

who do they confide in when shit hits the fan (besides each other)? Allison goes to Lydia, undoubtedly. Derek is not the type to talk about his relationship, but if he really needs to, he goes to Stiles. Or more like Stiles picks up he’s upset and nags him about it until he talks.

is it hard for them to talk about their feelings openly with each other? if so, is there any way that can be resolved, even in the slightest? It’s hard for both of them. For Allison because she sometimes feels like opening up like that is weakness, until she learns the difference. For Derek because he’s scared that if he appears vulnerable, he’ll be played and manipulated again.

who grieves more when the other is away? They don’t grieve each other’s absence and cope with it busing themselves in whatever thing is at hand at the moment.

who misses the other more, or really thinks about them more? Allison misses Derek a little bit more. Is not that he doesn’t miss her, but he is used to being alone and deals with the feeling better than her. But he thinks about her more.

do either of them have a special item (an article of clothing, a necklace, a book) that they use when they miss the other? if so, what is it? what do they do with it (read, wear, look at, smell)? After Allison lost Kate’s necklace, Derek bought her one with a little crescent moon and an arrow going through it and she loves it. He keeps a scarf that belonged to her and usually carries it on him if she’s not around

who cries more? who gets more emotional in general? They’re both emotional, but Allison cries more, though is not that often.

do either of them have the other’s stuff lying around their house? Allison has a lot of stuff lying around Derek’s house. Spare clothes, a backpack, a journal, pajamas, slippers. She even claimed half of his underwear drawer with her own underwear. Derek pretends to be annoyed by this, but he loves the way it’s now their space, not just his.

how about teasing? do they tease each other while in a fight (whether it be with themselves or just general teasing)? If they’re fighting with each other, they get too engrossed in the argument to even think about teasing. If they’re fighting someone else, they’re either supporting each other or trying to calm down their partner before anything gets physical.

do either of them have any vices? No.

what’s the thing they miss most about each other? Allison misses the way he makes her feel confident. Like she could conquer the world if she wanted and he’d be sure she doesn’t need help to do so. He misses the way she pushes him out of his comfort zone but also grounds him when he needs it.

what’s their go-to breakup/angst song? Impossible - James Arthur

who’s more jealous? Allison. She’s not insecure, but she really doesn’t like when someone flirts with Derek.

who is the first to forgive? Surprisingly enough, Derek.

what’s the one deal breaker for either of them (lack of communication, fear of commitment, etc)? It would be Derek’s fear to repeat his past mistakes. He’s constantly worrying about it and Allison gets fed up with it, even though she tries really hard to understand him. That and their misscommunications.

who would take longer to let go? do they ever really “let go”? Derek would have a harder time letting go but eventually he would, even if it takes him a long time. For Allison would be easier, but not less hurtful.

which is more afraid of confrontation? They seek confrontation, they surely ain’t afraid of it.

who’s the first to distance themselves (if either)? Derek. That’s his patented move. Allison only allows it for a short period of time, then she makes him confront her.

who’s more patient? is it hard to break that patience? They’re not very patient, but between the two of them it would be Allison. If that patience is hard to break, depends on the situation and her mood.

who’s the first to blame themselves? Derek, no doubt. Though he’s also quick to blame her.

who’s more likely to do something out of spite? Allison. Old habits die hard.

who would be the first to say they hate the other? would they mean it? Allison would say it and she’d mean it just a tiny little bit.

who worries more? Really hard to say, because both of them.

what scent reminds them of the other? Allison loves that Derek always has this piney smell on him, underneath the leather and his cologne. And Derek can’t exactly point out her scent, but it reminds him of long forgotten summer afternoons, like something sunny and citric.

do they have any regrets (regarding the other, or just in general)? They regret a lot of things, in general and specially regarding each other.

who’s quicker to walk away if a situation gets heated? Derek. His favorite coping mechanism is denial and avoidance, so he’d be really quick to walk away if things get too heated for his taste.

who is more prone to anger? They both are, though Allison’s anger is explosive while Derek’s anger is cold.

who cries more in an argument? do either of them cry? Allison cries because she gets frustrated and sometimes really wants to punch him, but she has to refrain herself, so she cries instead. It’s a way to relieve the impotence.

does it take a lot for it to get to the point of yelling? Not really, sometimes their fights escalate real quick and they’re rising their voices before even realizing it.

who sleeps on the couch? can either of them sleep without the other? Derek does. And is not that Allison makes him, he willingly goes there because he’s headstrong like that. Until she tells him he’s being absurd and coaxes him to go back to bed because they can sleep without each other, but is better if they’re together.

who’s more likely to protect the other? They both are.

if one of them gets injured, who worries more? They’re pretty even here. They both had sustained mortal injuries, and they can’t help but worry something like that could happen again.

who would be more afraid of the other’s death/harm? They’re not afraid of death or harm, but they have lost a lot of family and loved ones, so both of them hate the idea of losing another person they love.

who ends up yelling first? are they always yelling when arguing, or do neither of them yell at all? They don’t always yell, but who starts doing it depends on the situation.

who would be more likely to save who? Allison is more likely to save Derek’s ass, since he has like zero regard of his personal safety and sucks at planning strategies.

who stays up at night brooding? Derek’s second name is “brooding”.

who has more dreams/nightmares about the other? Derek has nightmares about her. It makes her feel kinda bad, but is not like he doesn’t have reasons.

who comforts who after a bad dream/event? They comfort each other.

do they think about each other a lot? does it affect their performance/schoolwork? They both avoid fantasizing about anything when they’re doing something important, so no.

if one of them were to come back after a long time, who would come to who? would it go well? would the other person take them back? Allison would come back and it could go very well or very bad. She’d have to gain Derek’s trust (again) and he’d have to prove that he’s grown enough for it to work. He might consider taking her back and vice-versa.

#dallison #Derek/Allison #derek x allison #ship ask #ship meme #teen wolf

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