#allowing myself a fursona just this once

[clambatch]

made a little dungeon meshi oc/sona!! maybe this isnt accurate to canon but i believe in the power of puppydog magics 🐶🧙

#dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi oc #dungeon meshi sona #allowing myself a fursona just this once #LOL #my art #digital

[cosmicstarshineart]

Graveyard of Unfinished Projects, Pt I

@anti-workshop asked me to do a deep dive on my Graveyard of Unfinished Projects, and i’m always thrilled to talk about my art!

i got this little cart (with working wheels!!) at target for $5. i am forever finding the most amazing little doll accessories from their discount bins at the front of the store. i’ve also got some fake greenery tiles for photoshoots, a cute bike (although that came from michael’s, i think), and an adorable little orange wheelbarrow. once the projects on it are finished, it will become a doll-sized tea tray.

first up: witch cubone! he had a bone club but it was really thin and it broke at some point. this is from an stl i found on thingiverse.

baby dragon eggs! I recently made an egg and a baby dragon for a coworker who is having a baby soon. i painted the egg iridescent pale pink and glued a deep pink heart jewel just above the clasp, and painted the dragon iridescent purple (purple is her favorite color). of course i forgot to take pictures before i gave it to her. >_< it was super cute though. stls from thingiverse.

tiny snail dragon with wings! i have a few different versions of these tiny dragons, the stls were made by the same person who made the eggs.

skeletal dragon, snail dragon with and without wings, regular dragon, sea dragon. i have a couple versions of each. here’s how they look on and off the sprue. they’re actually jointed and they’re held together by stringing with tiny hair elastics. i use the clear ones meant for braiding. the wings are strung separately from the rest of the body and let me tell you what a bitch it is to get the damn elastic threaded through the tiny holes. i need some really fine gauge jewelry wire to be able to string them without difficulty.

part of a tea set! these are roughly 1:4, or Mini Super Dollfie (MSD) scale. there’s more pieces in this collection, including a lid for the teapot, that i haven’t gotten around to printing yet. files from thingiverse.

sandshrew!

beacon the prussian blue (NOT navy blue) three-tailed kitsune, my fursona. she leads those who are lost out of the darkness by the light of her lantern. i customized and bought this stl from heroforge. their options for anthropomorphic characters have really expanded, and i’m here for it!

doll shoe bases. wedge heel on the left, platform heel on the right. i bought the files from moonlightjewel, they’re designed in monster high scale but 3D printing files are scalable so i scaled them up a bit for my MSD. haven’t decided what to do with them yet. i have plans for a retrofuture alien girl at some point maybe they’ll come in handy for that.

possum cowboys, aka the sheriff and her deputy! this was one of the first things i ever 3D printed. i believe the files for this came from thingiverse.

the PRIDE and JOY of the Unfinished Projects Graveyard; the only object in this post that i 3D sculpted myself. it was sculpted in nomad sculpt for the ipad, using a tutorial by erika casab of little robot studio. it was SO HARD but i didn’t even cry once. i’m still inordinately proud of it, but it is so freaking difficult to photograph!

tumblr only allows 30 images per post, so look out for pt 2!

#my art #3d printing #graveyard of unfinished projects #wips #pt I #cosmicstarshine creative diary #@cosmicstarshineart

[liongoatsnake]

How I Became Nonhuman (Otherkin, Therian)

When I first came into the multiple system called House of Chimeras, I was human. By virtue of the system's innerworld I knew that about myself. I also remembered bits of my past-life memories of being human. Finally, I felt like I was 100% human. Or least, I was human.

 At some point that began to change. It was subtle at first. A slight shift in something that mostly went unnoticed. That subtle shift began to build and gather momentum over time, however.

 It wasn't like I began questioning my humanity all along. There was just a point in my life that I went from 100% considering myself human to feeling that was no longer the case. Well, perhaps it didn't go directly to that just yet. It more started akin to an affinity, a connection to the nonhuman. I blame living surrounded by nonhumans. I began to think of "if I was an animal what animal would I be?" Sort of like someone choosing a fursona that best fits them or the ideal them, perhaps. Maybe if I was into daemonism, my daemon's form would be a golden jackal, sort of thing.

 I don't know for sure if I chose golden jackal or not. Maybe I did. I think I remember thinking at some point, "I'm human, but if I was an animal I'd be a golden jackal."

 A thought became a feeling, though. A very subtle feeling at first but it grew. I changed. A transformation. I went from being one of the few humans in this multiple system to being just another animal in this multiple system. Well, not entirely. My past-life left me with more of a sense of humanity than many other people in the system. I can also still take on my old human form if I wish in our innerworld. However, there is something of a golden jackal to me. My form in our system's innerworld can be either human, a sort of anthro golden jackal, or a plain golden jackal. When I front I know have phantom limbs and my mindset is more and having nonhuman instincts pricking at the back of my thoughts.  

 The feeling is still evolving too. Becoming deeper like the roots of a tree taking hold in fresh soil. Maybe I could have chose to stop it at some point. Maybe I could choose to even stop it now. I get the sense I could mentally block that influence from effecting me. I think there is something about this system or maybe our innerworld that did it.

 The same thing is happening to every other human member of this multiple system. Once-human should I say. It has occurred more quickly to some at others. Some have mentally blocked off the influence at times to adjust. My money is on it has to do with the mental bond that allows everyone in the system to communicate in our innerworld. Something about it nudged and slowly changed our very identities over time. I think I could have chose to block that bit of influence out or maybe controlled its direction more, but I kind of like how things turned out.

 I don't think I explained my experiences very well here at all. This is the first time I ever typed anything about it out. Maybe I could have done a better job at explaining it. I just know that I was once human, but I became nonhuman (otherkin, therian).

 - James Langford

#otherkin #therian #copinglink #animal-hearted #animality #nonhuman headmates #fictionkin

[happyhollow-mellowmarsh]

A Day in the Life of Gumi

“Zzzz……”

The camera continued to film the sleeping bunny for a while longer, before a small banana was brought into the frame, closer to the camera. The stem was cracked, and immediately the rabbit woke up with a start, looking around for the source of the banana… Before letting out a yawn.

“Awawawa…” 

Yawn finished, the rabbit hopped over, and began to munch on the banana. A smattering of Japanese kana floated across the screen, with the corresponding English translations captioned.

“Ohayou, everybunny! It’s me, Bubblegum, everyone’s favourite bun-bun!” The subtitles spelled out even if the rabbit herself didn’t actually vocalize anything. “Sorry for waking up late, peko! I was celebrating my third birthday yesterday… There was so much soda and I tired myself out partying!”

As she continued to munch, the camera was set down on a table. Their owner stepped into the frame of view still holding the banana, revealing a young Japanese woman in a white dress and a black hair bow: those of you who had knowledge of the idol scene (or had just read the channel’s about page) recognized her as the underground idol known as TASOGARE, or Dusky to others.

“Mama’s here! I mean, she’s always behind the camera, but she’s here now! And I love her so much!” Her free hand gently ruffled the back of the bunny’s ears. “Awawa! She always pets me just right!” 

A soft melody started playing over the two of them, before the overlaid intro card spelled out just what you were in for:

The next scene faded into a lounge room, where Bubblegum was being chased by what looked to be a tiny italian greyhound, barking as he went. Watching them frolic from atop a couch was an interesting animal, one that looked like a large cat the size of a boxer dog, but had fluffy wool much like a sheep possessed. She regarded the two on the ground impassively, as if waiting for the perfect time to strike, or simply because there was nothing better to do.

“Today, I want to introduce everyone to my familiar friends! The iggy chasing me is Bucephalus, though most of us usually call him Buce as a nickname. Say something cool, Buce-kun!”

“Yipyipyipyipyiphellohellohello!!” The tiny dog finally caught up, and booped his snout onto the fluff of Bubblegum’s tail. “Tag!”

This prompted the bunny to turn tail and chase after him back, and would not have been able to catch up to his superior speed if not for the sudden appearance of the sheep-cat, who bounded off her couch and down to block one of the greyhound’s escape routes.

“And this is my cousin, Baaby! She’s a really strong and magical sheep-cat hybrid! Please don’t call her a shat, she doesn’t like that.”

He dodged the large feline with a whine. “No fair! Why are you on her side?” 

"Because you slept on me... again. And you drool in your sleep." Baaby mewled lazily, licking one of her paws.

The chase continued for a few seconds more, before Buce bounded straight into the camera and knocked it into a black screen, setting up the next scene transition.

An underground lake framed the scene this time, as Bubblegum hopped along the water’s edge. Finding the first of her two friends, she thumped a foot in a high-five against the tailfin of the winged magical fish that leapt out of the water.

“This is Astrid! She’s a fairy koi, and she likes to swim down here. Mama likes to help her friend feed Astrid whenever she has the time to.”

The camerawoman, presumably Dusky, holds out a handful of apple blossoms towards the water. The fairy koi’s eyes light up from a distance, and she jumps out of the lake in a miniature water bubble controlled by her own magic, before swimming in the air over to munch.

“OMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM!!”

Finishing up all of the flowers, the fish let out a burp and smiled. “Thank you! Much appreciated! Astrid is very happy and full.” She blew some water bubbles into the air above Bubblegum before swimming back to the lake, popping her own water bubble as she did.

“See you around, Astri-tan!” Bubblegum waved, before continuing to hop along the perimeter.

Eventually, she came across a majestic horse-like creature resting on the side bank of the lake, with mottled green skin and a mane that looked more like seaweed than hair. A bright red eye cracked open at the sudden presence, as the sea-horse lifted her head to regard the rabbit.

“This is Undaria! She’s a kelpie, and she’s also my sister! Well, technically, half-sister, her dad and my mama are dating and all, but she’s my sister all the same! Say hi, Unda-chan!”

The kelpie neighed softly, prompting Bubblegum to hop closer. “What is it now, Bubbles?”

The bun hopped onto her half-sister’s back, before beginning to run her face through the kelp. “I’m helping to groom you! Because I can!” As she continued to trim through the kelpie’s mane, Bubblegum chirruped softly, “I love my sis so much! She’s the tsun-tsun to my dere-dere!”

“What does that even mean?” Undaria whinnied haughtily. It did not stop her from allowing the grooming to happen, or from gently setting the rabbit back down onto shore once she was done.

“See you later, nee-chan!” Bubblegum thumped happily, before skittering away to a new setting.

Now she was in the middle of a pumpkin patch, nibbling on some pumpkin leaves. “Hello again! My next friends are flying at the moment, so I’ll introduce you to them when they come down!”

A few seconds later, and they did. A white pigeon with streaks of purple and red in his wings glided down to land on a pumpkin, followed shortly after by a pale yellow budgie with a dash of small white spots on his head. They raised a wing in greeting. 

“I’m Berry!” The pigeon coos, before he scratched his head. “Still don’t know what kind of berry I’m supposed to be, but I guess it depends on the day.” He eyes the camera, and the person behind it extends a baked cracker, which he comes over to eat.

“And I’m Alkonost! I- ooh, cracker.” Distracted, the budgie hopped over to munch on the cracker. “Where was I? Oh yeah, I’m visiting today! Mom works somewhere else usually, but her girlfriend was in the area so I tagged along.”

While the birds were busy, Bubblegum moved further down the pumpkin patch; once they were done consuming the cracker, they led the camera over to their next pair of familiars.

Unsurprisingly, the massive clydesdale horse stood out first. Towering over Bubblegum and the two birds by a magnitude of at least ten, he had a dark brown mane with a matching brown tail, and a chocolate brown body with white patches around his face and legs. A loose red bandana was tied around his neck, and part of his mane had been braided to rest behind one of his ears.

At his feet was a strange snake-like creature, but this one was distinctly less long and slithery, and more compact and chubby. A glow stick necklace circled around this one’s neck, and his forked tongue stole chunks of pumpkin flesh as he vibed, brown and green stripes vibrating.

“This is Johnny Kane!” Bubblegum introduced, gently thumping her paw against the stallion’s leg. “I’ve been trying to get him interested in Unda-chan for a while now, but since he only comes to visit every now and then, there’s never really been much time to schedule a date.”

Judging by the long face on the horse, both metaphorically and literally, she was the only one in support of the idea. “Charmed.”

“And this is King!” Despite the natural tendency for rabbits to fear snakes, she approached him with no fear whatsoever. “He’s a tsuchinoko! Yes, tsuchinoko real. Do you wanna say anything?”

“Flpflpflpflpflp…” Retracting his tongue, King gave a toothy half-smile. “I mean… party rock is in the house tonight? I dunno, but I’m always down to have some fun.”

While rabbits weren’t usually capable of smiling, Bubblegum could trill happy vibes very well. “Aren’t we all? Thank you guys for showing up, I’m going to go find the others now. Stay sweet!”

Hopping away, she sped past the camera to the final pit stop in her adventure quest, a snazzy recreation room that contained a karaoke machine and a countertop bar. As she hopped inside, something ran outside, a black blur of an animal with the briefest flash of yellow eyes.

“That was Teto! It’s alright if we didn’t get to see her, she’s not very sociable.” Bubblegum sniffed. “Unlike the other black cat in the mansion… my mom’s boss, Trouble!”

She pauses in her tracks, scrunching up her face. “At least I know I’ve seen her as a black cat at some point a while ago… Maybe she likes transformation magic? Or maybe that’s just her fursona.”

Hopping onto a bar stool, the rabbit came face to face with a rooster on another stool. This was no ordinary rooster however, as instead of brown or white feathers, every inch of the sun bird’s body was covered in multicoloured flechettes. Both his comb and tail feathers had little balls of what looked to be concentrated fire, and he let out a cocky crow at the sight of the camera.

“This is Bata! He’s a sarima… sarima…” The subtitles were clearly poking fun at Bata’s species, even if both rabbit and mistress probably knew what he was. “Sun chicken! He’s a baby.”

“I am not!” He clucked back. “I am a very proud rooster who eats lots of big man food and can still find the time to give my Dad feather hugs whenever he wants them!”

Bubblegum blinked. “That’s… oddly specific.”

“Shush, don’t judge me, you get hugs from your momma all the time too.” He stuck out his tongue.

“Fair enough!” Bubblegum conceded with a trill. “And you will always be a baby because that’s what I remember you as when you were still a chick. A baby!”

Bata let out a squawk, preening his feathers. “Lies! Slander! I’m bigger than you, Bubble-brain!”

The two continued their friendly banter as Dusky stepped into view and pressed the service bell on the bar’s top. A little scratching noise was heard, before a mouse scampered up onto the bar: this mouse looked to be a little old, with a small witch’s hat that had probably seen better days, but he nonetheless squeaked cheerily to ask for orders.

“A tall glass of apple cider, please. And some water for them.” Dusky requested, giving the mouse a gentle pat on the head. The mouse moved to go make those drinks, and seconds later the order was set out in front of all three of the bar’s current occupants.

“And that’s Jeffrey! He was, um… he belonged to mom’s teacher before she passed away, but he’s still working here out of loyalty to my mom’s bosses. Really great mouse, who serves great drinks!” Bubblegum happily starts lapping at the water.

Once they were done, the idol scooped up her rabbit, waved goodbye to the other two familiars and walked out of the door. The scene cut back to the inside of their room, where Bubblegum is set down gently, and the bun hops around the room to exercise, just a little.

“As you can see, there’s a whole bunch of friends here with me in the mansion, and they come in all sorts of shapes and sizes and some of them are plenty magical, too!” Rubbing the back of her ears with a paw, Bubblegum yawned. “Familiar or not though… we’re still like everyday animals and we all have our own needs. Food, sleep, and of course, love!”

Dusky shows up one last time, simply to press a kiss onto Bubblegum’s eager forehead. “And I’ll always give you as much love as I can.”

“Yay! That’s all for tonight! I’ve been Bubblegum, and I wish you all a gumi-goodnight. Goodbye!” While the outro music played, Bubblegum hopped around in a circle before she binkied herself into her bed, waving at the camera one last time before the ending card signalled the vlog’s end.

[ayuthetigress-blog]

Greetings From a Big Big Kitty

 I’ve had this Tumblr blog for a while now. Time to finally make use of it. 

 My first post will probably just be me telling a bit about myself. First of, yes, I am a furry with a Sumatran tiger as my fursona. It’s a label that I spent years of thinking whether or not I should call myself that, and as a result, be part of the fandom. The thing is, I’ve always liked anthropomorphic animals. Growing up watching animal filled Disney movies allows me to have a high affinity towards them. I also had a huge collection of children’s animal encyclopedia. Why? I honestly have no idea. I was just really into zoology back then. And guess what? My love of it came back on my second year of uni when I did a course on adaptive behaviour of animals. I found out that I loved zoology more than biochemistry, something that I thought I’d be doing instead.

 Also, anthropomorphic art and photos of fursuits is something that I also always secretly loved. They would often appear on my old Twitter page and I had to resist the urge to retweet because I don’t want people to think I was a furry. Back then, I just think they were neat. 

 As you can probably guess, I didn’t want to call myself a furry before. Much of this is attributed towards both the actions done by bad people in the fandom, and the stigma as a consequence of it. If you’re a fur, you’d know that the term “furry” refers to a fandom, and not a fetish, which is often the initial interpretation. And while there are those who do perform sexual acts in relation o the fandom (I don’t really mind as long as everyone involved all CONSENT to it), there are those who have gone off the deep end and...well...actually have a thing for...ferals. News about bad furs abusing animals would often pop-up and that made me reluctant to be part of the fandom. I don’t want people to think that I’m one of “those people.”

  I just honestly decide to finally call myself one on the August of 2019, after stumbling across a video by YT-er by the name solarsaber that explained how furries are nothing more people who are into anthro animals, and that there are still many positive people in the fandom. If it weren’t for her, I may not have call myself a furry. 

 Another fur that also inspired me to be part of the fandom is Dr.Wildlife. Someone RT’d one of her post to my old Twitter timeline of her doing scicomm (short of science communication) whilst fursuiting and it’s honestly one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen! As someone who is doing scicomm myself, I believe communicating whilst fursuiting really helps to get audience’s attention. Thanks to her, I decided to join in on the fandom and made a goal to save up for a fursuit and use to make zoology scicomm content on YT. I can always do it without the suit, but I’d like to think that audiences would love to learn about animals, whilst dressing up as one. 

 Yes! I love science and science communication! That’s the second thing that I want to talk about myself. As mentioned before, I loved zoology as a child, followed by general biology years later. I also loved content creating, despite not being so good at it right now (hopefully that can change in the future). Hence, I decided to mix my love of both and become a science communicator, a field that’s relatively new, but I guess that’s the beauty of it. Everyday we are finding newer and creative ways to talk about science. Coming up with novel ways of doing so is an accomplishment itself. Just look at furry entomologist Entobird livestreaming ant feeding on their Twitch channel!

 Right now, I am an biology and psychology undergrad student at Auckland Uni in New Zealand. Fun fact, I’m not actually a Kiwi. I’m Indonesian, and only came to NZ to study my bachelors degree because of how affordable it is compared to other countries. If I was really a Kiwi, I would have my sona be a kea or a kārearea/NZ falcon instead of a tiger. This country has so much amazing bird species, I think I’ll write a post about it someday. 

(Fun fact, did you know that keas have similar intelligence to that of great apes?)

 Once I’m done with undergrad, I’m hoping I can work for a while before trying out for post-grad. But of course, with the pandemic currently going on (I wrote this in 16/04/20) I’m not sure how that will turn out...

Anyways, I think I’ve written enough for now. Next, I’ll be talking about why I chose a Sumatran tiger to represent myself. Take care, readers, and I’ll see you in the next blog post~

(Art by MissyMerlin and Strrrid)

#textpost #lifepost

[gynandromorph]

no one’s allowed to make mean-spirited jokes about juno though we’re not doing the dupe thing again alright, don’t send me meme-ass asks or clever quips about how stupid my Fursona is, i’m just frustrated with my brain but i think once i figure out how to reach some kind of understanding with myself it’ll be an invaluable perspective to have and i don’t need any fuckin grudge-bearers for suffering literally only i had to experience

#in fact i don't accept mean jokes about me in any way anymore at all #if i'm not supposed to be talking shit about myself even jokingly in my head why tf would anybody else be allowed to put me down for a laugh #just putting it out there i'm trying to be better now

[saturdaycrash]

a post on main got me thinkin abt middle school and early high school again..

i was the weird girl nobody wanted to talk to lol.  i was the one who was really into dragons and wolves with rainbow fur and vampires and werewolves and making super silly characters that i called my imaginary friends.  i loved to go on deviantart and look at pics of rocketchu and see everyone’s cool fursonas and then id go on youtube and watch animation memes and sonic animations.  i wore all black including a jacket i never took off, armwarmers, and a necktie for no reason

like i said i was the weird one that nobody walked to talk to.  i had maybe three friends throughout middle school and high school, only one of which i still talk to, because not only did i have social anxiety but also i was so weird i guess nobody wanted to interact with me.  i slowly lost my small circle of friends over time for one reason or another (biggest thing being moving schools) and i became socially isolated and chronically online instead b/c thats the only place i could find where i felt at home, like i fit in with people for once.  people wanted to talk to me online and that was amazing!

unfortunately those years had big effects on me.  i still feel socially isolated (i live with my fiance who i met online but neither of us really talk to anybody outside of each other) even in online spaces.  its seeped into my internet life..  i feel like even in fandoms im into the niche stuff so nobody really wants to interact with me on there either.  the places i used to feel at home in now make me feel pretty lonely and it kinda sucks a lot

there wasnt rly a point to this post i was just doing some introspection lol.  but i guess i will say as an addendum that im thankful that spaces like this exist (like the scene and nostalgia spaces) because they allow me to relive the times when i was enjoying myself and my interests without worrying about fitting in so much.  i dont consider myself scenecore b/c i feel like calling stuff “scenecore” implies that its trying to imitate the old scene culture instead of being, for lack of a better word, genuine?  and i feel like my connection to scene culture is still genuine because i lived it.  not knocking ppl who use scenecore its just not for my usage i guess lol

anyways. thanks to the 30 people who follow this blog still LMAO

[brigade-claire-opinions]

Review: Sonic Mania and Sonic Forces (Switch)

But mostly Forces, oops.

It’s no secret that I’m a huge Sonic fan. The Blue Blur has seen me through much of my life - in childhood, through my teen years, and now even to my mid-twenties. I’ve been there for every great Sonic game, for every poor Sonic game, and for every mediocre Sonic game. I’ve seen the Adventures, the 06s, the Unleashes, the Colors, the Generations, the Sonic 4s, the Booms. I’ve played the classic games, the Advance games, the Rush games, the Rivals games, I’ve even played The Dark Brotherhood. Sonic has been a part of my gaming life pretty much from the get-go.

When both Sonic Mania and Sonic Forces were announced last summer, I found myself far more excited for Forces - then known as Project Sonic 2017. A new 3D Sonic game by Sonic Team, a completely fucked-up looking world, another Generations-style team up of Classic and Modern Sonic... count me in.

Sonic Mania, meanwhile, looked like a nostalgia trap. While I’ve always had a soft spot for the classic Sonic titles - Sonic 3 & Knuckles especially, as it was my first Sonic game - I’ve always preferred the 3D games. I like my Adventure games, my Colors, my Generations, even Lost World had its moments. I didn’t think I would enjoy Mania.

I was incorrect. Sonic Mania, while definitely a nostalgia grab, turned out to be a great experience, all the better because of the nostalgia factor. Each returning stage was remixed - both visually and audibly - with fantastic results; each original stage felt wonderfully handcrafted.

The controls were as smooth as butter. The game felt similar to the classic games, but... refined. Definitely better. The game had so many cool things going for it, too: drop-dashing as Sonic, having new routes (and even a completely different stage at one point) as Knuckles, Debug Mode, “& Knuckles” mode, the return of Blue Sphere, a better UFO mode than Sonic CD... Sonic Mania was a great time, and at $19.99, was a great value even with the short length. There was a lot to love there, and I was more than satisfied with the end result.

Yet... Mania felt like filler. Sonic Forces was still looming on the horizon, and despite thoroughly enjoying Mania, it was overshadowed by the new 3D game. I loved the opening theme - Fist Bump featuring Douglas Robb from Hoobastank. I loved the idea of being able to create an avatar - make all the jokes about fursonas that you want, but what a way to bring a new idea! And I loved that, gameplay-wise, the Avatar looked like a refined Sonic Boom character. I loved Infinite’s edgy OC feel and his edgy Punkstep theme. I loved just how... ridiculous, how over-the-top it all looked. I played the terrible Switch demo and wished I could play more than just one minute of each stage. When the game finally launched on Tuesday, I was more than ready.

I’m aware of the mixed reception of this title. I have both a PS4 and a Switch; I chose the Switch versions because Sonic has always felt more at-home on Nintendo for me than any of the other platforms. I’m aware that the Switch version of Forces is considered to be inferior to the others. I’m aware of the 30fps, the 720p, the reported framerate issues... I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I felt that I’d made the correct decision.

Ladies and gentlemen, it brings me great pleasure to say that I thoroughly enjoyed my time with Sonic Forces. That doesn’t mean the game is perfect - it’s definitely flawed, with some flaws more glaring than others.

Sonic Forces is split into four different types of gameplay - 2D platforming gameplay as Classic Sonic, 2D/3D hybrid gotta-go-fucking-fast platforming as Modern Sonic, Sonic Boom-esque 3D and 2D slower adventure platforming as the Avatar, and a team-up hybrid of Modern Sonic and the Avatar.

Ultimately, that last one is the game’s biggest flaw for me - the two gameplay styles don’t blend nearly as well as Sega thinks they do. It feels weird controlling two characters at once, and because the Avatar is slower than Sonic and doesn’t have a homing attack - they use a grappling hook instead - there’s a weird dissonance. Sonic will often speed ahead of the Avatar, and whenever you try to perform a homing attack, there’s an awkward second that Sonic will be floating in the air next to the Avatar as they fire their hook. The Team Boost function, while cool, feels needless. It’s more of a means to skip large sections of stages rather than actually play through them - and since the move is executed regardless of whether you properly perform the “required” QTE, control of the game is basically ripped from you.

I should note here that I played the game on Hard mode. Normal mode seemed to be “noob mode,” so I decided to try to make the game a little more challenging for myself. I had a blast on this mode, but my experience my vary from someone who played on Normal.

Playing as the Avatar is fun. After the first stage of the game, you’re tasked with creating your furry pal - you choose their gender, their race, their skin color, their fur color, and their voice. Each Avatar race has a different ability - I created a female wolf for my first playthrough, meaning that I drew in nearby rings as I went by them. After you beat the first Avatar stage, you unlock the ability to change their clothes and weapon - and this is where the meat of the Avatar system lies. There are many unlockable Avatar parts that you earn throughout the game. Some are fucking great looking; others, not so much. I spent much longer than I care to admit just customizing my wolf girl to make the cutest outfits I could, so take that for what it’s worth. It also helps that I had the preorder costumes, so my girl ran around in Joker’s coat from Persona 5 along with some Converse and cute gloves.

The Avatar is equipped with a weapon called a “Wispon.” That’s right, folks, the Wisps from Sonic Colors are back. However, with the exception of Yacker, their Hyper-Go-On energy is harnessed for use in the Avatar’s weapon. Each weapon uses a different Wisp to power its ability, and each stage is laden with them. Since the Wisps have no plot relevance yet again, I found this to be a cool excuse to use them - they seem to just be residents of Sonic’s planet now. The Avatar’s stages also have varying routes that can be accessed with different Wispon abilities, thereby upping replay value.

Yacker is used yet again as Modern Sonic’s boost ability. These stages are more of what you expect from Colors and Generations - boost, react to platforming challenges while boosting, occasionally switch to 2D mode for some precision platforming, etc. I did notice, however, that the game seemed to punish me for boosting mindlessly through these stages. I often found myself careening off ledges or right into enemies, causing some rather humiliating deaths. It’s important to note that most of these deaths felt like my fault and not the game’s - I wasn’t paying attention and I was punished for it. This is a huge factor for me. It’s one thing if a death is caused by my carelessness or lack of skill - it’s another if the game throws bullshit at me. Aside from a few instances where something seemed to just come out of nowhere, I felt that the game was fair with its punishment.

I wasn’t fond of the Classic Sonic stages in Generations. Classic Sonic felt weirdly floaty, stiff, and slippery. Those stages felt like a chore to me, and I pretty much only played them to get them over with so I could get to the Modern Sonic stages.

In Forces, Classic Sonic controls very similarly to how he did in Sonic Mania. He even has the Drop Dash ability, which makes him feel like a dream. I very much enjoyed these stages; none overstayed their welcome. While I feel that his involvement in the game’s plot is questionable, these stages were a nice change of pace.

The plot of Sonic Forces is ridiculous. Many of the reviews I’ve read have stated that it’s the worst part of the game, that it sullies the experience, etc. I know I’m in the minority, but I really, unironically enjoyed the story. Yes, like I said, it’s ridiculous, utterly stupid. But the game fucking commits to that shit. Sonic and Eggman are as cocky and arrogant as ever, Tails is still not-so-subtly gay for the Blue Blur, Knuckles and the rest are just kind of there... all of this is par for the course.

The over-the-top part of the story comes in the form of Infinite, the game’s new antagonist. This dude hates all things good, and is basically the culmination of every edgy Sonic OC ever created. He wears a mask, he has one weird demonic eye, he has a gem embedded in his chest that allows him to do crazy shit... while I know that he’s not some commentary on Sonic OCs, I like to think that Sonic Team was at least somewhat self-aware with this guy. Liam O’Brien voices him, which just increases the edge factor tenfold. Sonic is a great foil for him, too - whenever Infinite growls some edgy phrase, Sonic drops a dopey one-liner. Brilliant chemistry.

Let’s actually take a moment to discuss the voice acting. Returning as the voice of Sonic is Roger Craig Smith, who’s now portrayed the Blue Blur for longer than anyone else has, and in more things than anyone else has. If you liked him in the other games or shows where he’s Sonic, you’ll like him here - if you didn’t, then this game probably won’t change your mind. I personally love Smith’s take on Sonic and prefer it over Ryan Drummond’s and (vastly over) Jason Griffith’s. Like in Generations, however, Classic Sonic does not have any spoken dialogue, so he has no voice actor. I think that it’s really cute how he communicates in gestures and facial expressions, so this is a non-issue for me.

Mike Pollock’s Eggman is also as brilliant as always. He doesn’t really throw his voice around here like in the other games, probably because Eggman’s already achieved his goal here. The Eggman Empire is actually finally a thing - it’s so fucking gratifying to see, and Pollock really brings out that raging pride in Baldy McNosehair’s voice.

The rest of the voice cast is great too - Colleen O'Shaughnessey brings good performances for Tails and Charmy (though I can’t help but miss Kate Higgins for Tails), Cindy Robinson is good as Amy, Travis Willingham and Matt Mercer are good as Knuckles and Espio respectively, Karen Strassman really brings it for Rouge, Quinton Flynn is good as Silver, I can’t hear Vic Mignogna behind Omega’s voice filter, so thank the gods for that, you get the point. The voice acting is great.

I want to take a moment to applaud Kirk Thornton for his performance as Shadow. Before this game, I didn’t really care for his portrayal of Shadow. I couldn’t tell you what it was, but something just seemed off. He seemed miscast. This time around, however, he sounds great as Shadow. I still hold that Jason Griffith (yes, he voiced both Sonic and Shadow before the change) gave the best performance, but in my opinion, it seems like Kirk finally found his stride for Shadow in this one.

There are two ways to play as Shadow in this game - the first is through the free Episode Shadow DLC, which serves as sort of a prequel to the events of the game. The second is that when you S rank certain Modern Sonic stages (or all of them, maybe? I haven’t S ranked all of them yet), you can play as Shadow on subsequent run-throughs. As of this writing, I haven’t played through Episode Shadow yet, but I have played as Shadow in two Sonic stages. It may just be me, but he feels different from Sonic - he feels more like he did in Adventure 2, which is great. His boost is also pretty silly to look at.

The music in Forces is top-notch. Classic Sonic stages have a chiptune sound to them, remnicscent of the hedgehog’s 8- and 16-bit adventures. Modern Sonic stages tend to have fast-paced rock soundtracks, as is custom for our green-eyed friend. The Avatar has electronic music in their stages, so expect lots of techno wub.

In all, Sonic Forces is a pretty good package. My playthrough clocked in at about 8 hours, which I’m okay with, but may be a little skint for the $40 price of admission. Still, I had a great time with the game. It scratched the itch I’ve had for years for a good 3D Sonic game. I noticed none of the technical issues that others have pointed out, so take that for what it’s worth. While it may not be perfect for everyone, it was good enough for me.

This year was a great year for Sonic, with games that should satisfy both types of Sonic fans. Sonic Mania and Sonic Forces are both available for PC, PS4, Switch, and Xbox One. Sonic Mania goes for $19.99, while Sonic Forces retails for $39.99.

#review #Sonic Forces #Sonic Mania

[alphayellawolf-blog]

BurningWhite Beware

This beware was written by Alana Mackenzie Willis and this is her experience

His FA Accounts and DA Account: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/burningwhite/ http://www.furaffinity.net/user/shiire/ http://burningwhite.deviantart.com/

WHERE: http://degil-hollow.deviantart.com/ http://burningwhite.deviantart.com/

WHAT: Character theft, Harassment

WHEN: Well found out today the character has been stole, (May, 15 2017) however had ongoing issues since, December 20th 2016.

EXPLAIN: Bought design july 9th from Abseline on Furaffinity, was not linked species TOS, broke 1 rule, changed the species. abs sold species to snuggery, got black listed by snuggery, now the species is own by BurningWhite who illegally is uploaded my fursona Roiell to the species data base. He is not apart of this species, been asked more than once to remove, will not remove. "Revoked" the character cause of the species change (even though this was long before). Likely going to be trying to use or sell the character to someone else. You'll notice in the caps he calls the oc "Roiell"(mine) a 2g character, please be aware he flipped to of my ocs. Roiell (is the one getting stolen) worth of approx. $557, the 2g oc is Watermelon. (he has a suit hence the worth) If you see the oc being used by anyone but myself, its been stolen. Thanks.

PROOF: (ps, Snowharpies, Sandvamp, Abs, and Blooflies are the same person, while Munkwhut, Shiire and burning white are the same person)http://imgur.com/a/ESpTb cap #1 When snuggery black listed me from the group, White started messaging me if Roiell was for sale. cap#2 the first time i asked for removal (at the time i was helping with the species hence why Roiell was forced into being a degil again) cap #3 I had told him i hadn't made up my mind /as/ atm I was streaming and couldn't reply to him (that and i didn't want to) cap #4 again i had /demanded/ him be removed. cap #5 this is the /second and third/ time i asked for removal along with my friend explaining he can't just take the oc as he was never to be classed as the species and he was paid for. cap #6 I have been removed as the design's owner which brings my supision he might get resold or live with White. cap #7 & 8 He got the person (abs) who i bought the design from involved. Cap #9 is the DMCA I sent cap #10 - 30. caps from my partner. Some realting and some not. Vesta is an oc that is my partners but i have the rights to ship, draw, and buy art of and to use in general. We kinda co-own him but not really. he is classed as my oc but my partner holds his rights. cap #31 his ref of him as a degil (feral) this is how he was uploaded. (art by Abesline) Cap #32 is my art when i changed the species to a deer dragon (anthro) I write it like that because he is part noodle dragon now and have no current feral art. (art by me) Cap #33 I was no longer a co-founder but aslo was not allowed to leave. Drop box link, caps from a admin chat about the deal and other thingshttps://www.dropbox.com/…/u9kymc…/AAChYidnetGzGjeOT090iZD2a… Cap #34 -#38 more stuff between him and my partner about Roiell and Vesta Cap #39 my beware got leaked to him. Cap #1-39 are from December Cap #40 & 41 he sent a mod after me, March 15th. Cap #42 - 46 He sent toyhouse after the character (apr. 27) Cap #47, Roiell has now offically been stolen. stash link here --->http://sta.sh/22duljpk3838 (Small update here, the Stash link no longer works) Cap #48 Till end these are from today (may 14th 2017) AND is just more added information.

#IAmNotResponsibleForTheActionsOfOthers #beware #artist-beware #harassment #stolen-art #stolen-character #NotADegil #Roiell

[stewy497]

Stew Reviews - Dust: An Elysian Tail

What’s this, two reviews within a week of each other? What absolute madness is this? Could it be that Stew finally grew a sense of discipline and decided to start posting consistently? To that I say, dream on Mister Strawman. I had been planning this review for some time, and the Switch release of Dust: An Elysian Tail last month presented an excellent opportunity to finally tackle it, but at the same time I’d already planned out the introduction to my inFamous: Second Son review, and I didn’t want to miss the window of relevance as badly as I usually do. So, I took the logical option and decided to push myself, just this once. But enough about my scheduling habits, we’re here to talk about games, so let’s do that.

SPOILERS AHEAD. PROCEED WITH CAUTION.

As with so many other similar independent projects, Dust: An Elysian Tail is a 2D Metroidvania hack-and-slash platformer, developed by Humble Hearts game studio – that is to say, one dude named Dean apparently trying to look more popular than he really is. As much as I tease him for that however, I can’t help but admire the guy’s dedication to the project – the core gameplay is solidly constructed, the visuals in particular I imagine to have taken a lot of work, and the story manages to apply itself to some surprisingly mature and complex themes despite the slightly childish presentation.

Dust takes place in a world populated with anthropomorphised animals and is set against the backdrop of a war-torn land consisting, against all odds, of mostly lush, green forests and meadows. You play as the enigmatic Dust, a faceless teal-furred canine with an oversized hat and a mysterious backstory. Without any memories of his past, he embarks on a quest to rediscover his true identity at the behest of Arah, a magical talking sword, and a small orange bat/rabbit thing named Fidget. Yes, the plot starts out somewhere between Disney Classics and My First Fursona – a comparison that only worsens with the introduction of soul merging and induces flashbacks to the Final Fantasy VII House - but over the course of the game it acquires more depth and deviates towards more interesting themes.

The aforementioned war is more of a looming threat than something actually present in the foreground for most of the game, but as the plot unfolds it’s threaded through a series of encounters which showcase just how far-reaching the conflict is, as guilty and innocent alike are affected by it. The point where I decided I was fully on-board with it was during the second act, where despite their best attempts to avert catastrophe, Dust and Fidget are unable to save the life of a dying villager – something that Dust doesn’t take particularly well. The sequence works because it’s a subversion of the usual narrative, and Dust’s grief and frustration with himself  reveals a more introspective element not often seen in this sort of story. The contrast with the cartoonish visuals only serves to make it more effective, and it’s only slightly undermined by the voice acting.

I wouldn’t say that it’s awful by any means, but there’s a certain amateurish, almost caricature-like quality to many of the voices in Dust. The titular character himself is by far the worst offender, as he seems to confuse dramatic, tortured delivery with standing too close to the microphone. Every time he delivers a “wh” sound it comes out like he’s just finished running a half-marathon and listening to it makes me want to tear my own ears out. And considering how many whats, whys and hows the average clueless amnesiac character throws around, that’s a lot of tearing.

On the gameplay side of things, there’s not much to say that I haven’t already said. You jump around on collections of floating rocks a whole bunch, sometimes there’s a group of enemies between you and where you want to be, so you start mashing buttons until the path is clear again. In all honesty, while the combat is perfectly functional and somewhat entertaining, I feel like there could have been more to it – for a magic sword, the list of available combos is rather disappointingly short; light combo, ground throw, air launch, air throw, plunging attack. You’ll have seen every one of them by the time you reach the fourth screen.

Transitioning between moves feels sticky at times too, since many of them have long animation cycles that can’t be cancelled out of, which tends to leave you vulnerable or waste crucial seconds that results in a particularly long streak of hits ending prematurely. Then again, it does mean that the combat demands some degree of skill, as button mashing is more likely to leave you vulnerable than a carefully executed string of movements, which is part of what keeps it entertaining. Annoyingly Dust has inherited that quality of Symphony of the Night wherein the protagonist is thrown back by any incoming damage, which is particularly annoying during the time trial levels. It also makes Reed’s quest almost impossible if you don’t prepare for it, since the required revival stone is expensive and grinding up cash simply isn’t feasible while Dust is constantly taking damage.

The platforming is fairly bog-standard as metroidvania goes, but while in other examples of the genre exploration is demanded to make progress, it feels far less necessary in Dust as the progression is fairly linear. The movement abilities typical of the genre like the double jump or wall climb are simply given to you as you need them. The only purpose exploration serves in Dust is to hunt for treasures and secrets, making it less “exploration” and more “arbitrary backtracking for the sake of 100% completion”.

A treasure chest might give you some decent gear, but enemies also drop crafting blueprints regularly and the shop system makes it trivially easy to acquire the necessary components; any time you sell a material to the shop, it is catalogued and periodically restocked with no input required on your part. You don’t even need to visit a shop to buy materials, since an early quest allows you to craft items without visiting the blacksmith and grants you access to a portable shop to boot. Granted, grinding for the rarer materials would have been annoying, but this makes it zero effort to complete the item-gathering quests.

And as long as I’m complaining, there’s also a secret room in the snowy mountain stage which is literally impossible to find without a walkthrough; you have to find a cliff face in the middle of the level with an hourglass carved into it, and deduce that if you kneel in front of it for ten seconds, a tornado will appear from offscreen and teleport you to the secret room. Yeah, it’s poking fun at Castlevania 2’s obscure puzzle solutions, but acknowledging that what you’re doing is stupid does not equal biting satire, Dean.

Lastly, the final level isn’t great. The lion’s share of it is spent cutting a path through the big bad’s soldiers to confront him, most of which can block your attacks even when lying prone and concussed by a sliding tackle to the ankles. It completely obliterates any sense of flow in the combat, and, contrary to the rest of the game, makes button mashing a valid option. The final boss probably would have been about perfect if he wasn’t supported by these hangnails.

 Additionally, since this is the final confrontation in a long and bloody war, the game sends you in with a squad of NPC support fighters. All this does, however, is clutter the battlefield and make any given encounter impossible to read. I’m not even sure the NPCs are capable of damaging the enemies, but like I said, I couldn’t tell through the clouds of dust and waving spears.

For all my whining, however, I can’t deny that I’ve enjoyed my time with Dust each time I’ve gone back to it, and if there is a second instalment planned for the world of Falana, then I await it eagerly. The beautiful visuals, gorgeous soundtrack and compelling story do a lot to make up for the game’s more annoying aspects. If you’ve an itch or a particular soft spot for this sort of 2D action-platformer then it is a strong contender that I’d definitely recommend.

#platformer #hack and slash #fantasy #story rich #furry #anthro #humble hearts #review

[bambuizeled]

"I will learn to live again, for now I'm breaking All the things I couldn't mend without escaping I will learn to love again I will learn to love I will learn" - “I Felt Free” by Circa Survive

Hey look! It’s Krissy! My first fursona... Or well... One of my first fursonas. Krissy was a German Shepherd because they were my favorite type of dog back I made them. You probably have to have known me for 7+ years to even remember them. Why am I posting them and why did I draw them again? Well... It’s a long story...

Before we begin I just want to say this is not vent art and not even a vent post with what will be mentioned---The followup to this is more vent related anything. This is gonna be touchy. It talks about abuse, manipulations, and stalking lil’ mentions of suicide idealization---Stalking that still seems going on to this day! But we'll get to that...

So... I'll clarify that this happened around back in 2010 and most of this shit took place on Deviantart unless stated otherwise. Sadly this was before we constantly spammed the “PRT SC” button for receipts and shit so much dialogue is lost and some is shit I’ve forgotten. I used to delete my accounts due to being overwhelmed, too.

Sometimes people end up having the wrong person in their lives. Unfortunately, It happens. Stuff like this can happen the most when we're younger and impulsive. Online relationships were an odd concept for me but I found myself getting into one. When I thought I had a good relationship I was going to through a rough time with a abusive parent and wound up in the hospital for an entire week. I remember that day pretty well. Went to school as normal but had to leave early as my mom picked me up and she drove me to see doctor and wound up having to stay in the hospital for a week due to suicidal thoughts. Didn't get to mention "Hey, I can't be online for a long while" on Deviantart to let any of my friends know. So I was stuck in there for a week.

Only to come back online, not wanting to mention the specifics as other people asked me why I was gone for so long---Including my datemate, who wound up suspicious over me being gone. Back then, I never liked mentioning my mental illnesses or doctor’s trips and I still don't really do that now unless I know someone really well or I need to clarify something about my behavior. But back then I hated mentioning my mental illnesses to the point where I often lived in the delusion that I was normal and didn’t need my meds. But me being gone for a week enough for him to decide for us to break up because he met someone else during the same week I just happened to be gone. And apparently their mother got suspicious of me because I lived in another country and was dating their child. The usual "You might be dating someone much older than you case" when it wasn't that at all. But, of course, we had to break up. Coming back to that after a terrible stay in the hospital for a week and dealing with an abusive mother honestly had nothing more than self harm and suicide on my young, teenage mind. But I still didn’t want to mention anything in regards to my personal life so I never explained...

It was less about breaking up and more as to how it was handled. There was a copy-paste note sent out to multiple people---including me. Explaining the whole situation and mentioning that he and I had broke up in a small footnote. And that. Put me on the breaking point and I simply blocked him and planned to ignore him from that point. Of course, my decision immediately caused chaos. He wound up creating a fake account to pretend he was someone else. A brand new account just popping up and someone immediately talking to me? He asked me if he could draw one of my OCs. I said "Sure" and once the drawing was done, I had a suspicion over who it was. And we eventually had a conversation via notes and since I was still sad about the breakup. I was asked if I could just forgive him and I responded with a "no". And then being told it's a good idea to forgive people... Coming from the stalker who had to make a new account, pretend it wasn't him, and then try to make himself look like the victim? Haaah.

So it went back to quietness until there were various journals "calling me out". Mentioning how mean I was or belittling me to the public on journals from Deviantart to Furaffinity. And of course, multiple people would end up disliking me and talking shit about me in the comments. Boy, as someone who deals with paranoia in my adulthood---I wonder how that came to be, eh?

And when I don't let him have his way----He ends up making vent art and ranting about me in submissions! How nice to have something escalate from journals to vent art about me so it can blasted on the front page to DA and FA. It's funny because when the vent art was posted---I was called a "whiny bitch" when this person was the one another account for block evasion, making journals and art submissions that namedropped me no less. While I just stayed quiet because I was going through child abuse and dealing with racism at school and I did not remotely feel safe online when spending time and posting art on Deviantart was one of the few things that made me happy.   What a wonderful experience I had there, right?

After all of the ranting, I ended up receiving some sort of apology message from my ex but he used someone else to send it to me via note on FA. Because of all of the harassment---I accepted the apology even though I didn't want to. I wanted this to stop. I had no choice because I was already dealing with a lot in real life. I at least wanted to feel safe on Deviantart.

Eventually we did start talking to each other again in July of 2010... Then there was some sort of fight that my mind draws a blank at in 2011. There was a disagreement over something and it was back to not being friends again, apparently he was the one to end it. Maybe that's why I don't remember? Because it did mean freedom for me after feeling forced to stay with this person. It was probably something meager or something really stupid in his case. But it did go back with me being publicly shamed again so I'll leave that note here as well. Then I was begged for forgiveness once more and I accepted the apology again because I scared.

But you know what did all of the harassment amounted to? This person publicly slandering about how much of a bitch I was for not forgiving him and just deciding to cut ties? Wanting me to go about my life because I was dealing with a lot in my life and my only safe space was being contaminated? You want to know what all of that amounted into? I got ignored and I got neglected. No. I'm not fucking joking.

Each time we cut ties and got back together---There was a bit of talking and then just silence all the way through. It was more prominent after 2011. And you want to know who was the ONLY person to bother with starting conversations with this abusive person? Me. Because I thought we were friends. But we really weren't. No matter what he says otherwise. It was nothing more than a delusion. Constant complaints about me for blocking him when I wanted nothing to do with him only for me to "forgive" apologies because I wanted the harassment to stop. I was forced into a friendship with someone because I wasn’t allowed to make my own decisions without the threat of slander and I was miserable.

So from July 2011 up to June 23rd 2016----I was the only person to say "Hi" or actually try to get chatter going. Most of the time conversations would end in abrupt silences. No replies or anything for over months to years. No updates or anything. Even passively aggressively mentioning me on a Deviantart journal where you answer questions and it asks you who your friends are and for some reason I’m added to the list with some sort of passive aggressive “I know we don’t talk much, but I still consider you a friend”. Yeah, not like he ever bothered to talk to begin with. What a great friend. But mentioning that we don’t talk on a DA journal is more appropriate than starting a conversation apparently. Maybe I was expected to break the ice again but at that point I was not interested in speaking to him anymore. Most of the time, I don’t mind it if me and friends don’t talk for a long while. Heck, there’s friends who I haven’t talked to in over a year and we’re still on good terms. But this.... Is a different case than not talking to someone for over a year or a general long period of time---This is a case of having someone harass you for not wanting to talk to them and when they can talk to you---they ignore you instead. AND THIS HAPPENED TWICE.

So... What happened on June 23rd 2016? I sent him a note, asking him to never contact me or interact with me or any of my accounts ever again. But due to the disrespect for my spaces---Well... That’ll be revealed shortly afterwards.

______________

You'd think me typing all of this would mean I'm mad, right? Hah. When we get to the other part and such---Then you’ll see why I’m mad.

I drew this picture as something that represents me. Or well, a part of me. Specifically the younger part of me---Back when I was about 15 when this all happened. I wanted to draw something light for this topic. Because of dealing with 6 years of that crap. Having this person out of my life and even kicking them out when it was clear they didn’t really care for me from the beginning made me so happy with myself. The entire time I was forced into a relationship that made me feel unsafe and scared. And yet I was still the one to ever bother talking.

All in all; be kind to yourself. Have the right people in your life---Specifically non-toxic people.  A mutual relationship with understanding is better than a relationship where it's one-sided and there's too much tension or someone is uncomfortable around you. Breaking away seems scary---And it is. But sometimes you need to break away and heal.

The topic of "healing" and "recovering" can be a scary subject to people. I know I always dreaded the concept for some reason---More so to the concept of me never being able to recover over broken relationships. But when I told this person I didn't want him in my life anymore---I felt free. To cut back any ties that were holding me back. To let go any bad memories that I'd usually think about during my depression spells. (Which did stop during said spells, thankfully.) And I felt so proud of myself finally cutting ties with someone who took me for granted and ignored me.

Sometimes you'll never forgive a person---That lack of forgiveness for someone isn't a "grudge". Whether or not you forgive doesn't make you a bad person. You can forgive the moments to move on. To think my stalker pretended to be someone else and suggested forgiveness where it was not his place to.

Maybe what I say is something people can't relate to. I'm human, and we're all different. And situations are different.  Healing and recovery is different for people and different for everyone. So take it all with a grain of salt because what I mention is from my own experience

But do know this, if you ever experience a toxic relationship that ends up with stalking as a result---Please. Take care of yourself and I hope you are well.

[crazykendal]

woah if I were you I would .totally. read though this

did you pay attention to anything you were being taught in health class?   health class.. like family life or what

what are your feelings regarding shopping?   I hate shopping

do you think people have any misconceptions about you? Honestly im mean around a lot of people and I think people think im mean to everyone which is not true. I can get really soft with some people

have you ever worn fishnets? nooo...

do you go somewhere to get your eyebrows done? nowhere:)

do you believe prayer really works? no

do you have one best friend who is always there for you? yeah she’s weird

describe one of your most emotional farewells. haha nonononononoonon

have you ever been tied up? like literally or mentally.. ohhh god no

how many times have you been cussed out? dunno

does it bother you when people ask personal questions? no, it just means that they might care more

do you know anyone who’s been in jail? a tonnnn

have you ever considered acupuncture? No

have you ever watched the same sex undress? no..?

have you ever seen the last person you kissed cry? no

have you ever seen your mom or dad drunk? no

do you enjoy mario games? like super mario yes my dads a hardcore fan

do you think that necessities should be free? (ex. food, toilet paper) no you must work for shit dood

does it bother you when dogs lick you? no they love me

do you feed your pets human food? yeah haru loves chicken

which is worse: being sexist or racist? both are absolutely horrible, but nothing is worse than a perachel shipper

do you think suicide is selfish? man.. it ends the pain but it starts more pain to people close to you. It seems selfish but it really depends

would you take a dirty picture of yourself for someone you are dating? No

what are the most embarrassing songs in your itunes library? i dont have any embarrassing shit that i can think of

how picky are you when it comes to choosing who to kiss or not kiss? oooohh man idk

do you feel that having sex anywhere but a bed is more exciting? ..yyeahh..

in your opinion, is it ever okay to get back with an ex? depends on who

what’s the first animal you go to see at the zoo?  i never go to the zoo

what’s the strangest or rarest creature you’ve seen at a zoo? idk

what animal is at a zoo that really, in your opinion, shouldn’t be? all of them they want to be FREED

do you like zoos or aren’t you bothered? why so much fucking zoo shit

i offer you a cigarette, you say… nope i dont want lung cancer

why do you think you were put on this earth? to fucking suffer and to make others suffer

is it ever okay to hit a child? when is this? no unless they are gonna kill you

do you think violence in video/computer games influences the nation also? no i hate people who believe this

are you in any shape or form, racist? no

are you in any shape or form, sexist? no but i kinda prefer girls if you know what i mean :)

how do you think the world will end? either a nuclear war or global warming haha

what natural phenomenon do you find the most beautiful? death :)

would you kill someone who killed a child? how about YOUR child? sure dood

what is your favorite cover of a song? halsey covered justin bieber’s love yourself and replaced love with fuck. i relate to this cover more than I do with my family

have you ever been in love with someone who was fatally ill? no?

have you ever received or given a make-over? no..

do you know anyone who is HIV+? not that i know of

have you ever been to a desert? idk but I feel like i live in a desert

do you know any trans* people? yeah and also I met MILES MCKENNA yussss

what is your favorite beatles song? uh..

what is the poorest you have ever been? when I first had no money haha

i’m sure you know of the gamer fad on youtube. who’s your favorite? like youtubers?? oh god. I used to love ihascupquake, dantdm, and ldshadowlady when I used to like minecraft but its now more vanoss gaming, zac cox tv, thegaminglemon, thedevildoggaming, and lets play games

is there something written on your shirt right now? it says Mavel

what is your favorite song to play on guitar hero or rock band? ooh I love those games I just dont have it

where do you find the surveys you take? I follow an account

what’s one weird/annoying thing your pet(s) tend to do? BUB ATTACKS THE SHIT OUT OF MY OTHER CATS

what’s your favorite song by your favorite artist?   Salt Skin by Ellie Goulding, Colors by Halsey, Secrets by The Weeknd

do you have an “original character?” what.. like something ive come up with myself? If so, dont even get me started. I literally have about 100 characters ive created for this huge long ass collection of stories ive been writing for about 3 years.

what about a persona/fursona?   wut

do you ever MAKE your own surveys? no way

why’s it the woman who have to give birth anyway if the man is physically stronger in most cases? because the man isnt strong enough ;)

do you get good internet where you live? no my room has no wifi but my backyard is gr8

ever had a cavity? how many? yeah idk how many haha

ever broken a tooth? I thought i did once

what did you do on the playground at your school as a child? idk

are you into comics? I recently wrote a 60-70 page comic for a series im writing

did you ever have computer disc games you played as a kid? yeah GTA San Andreas all the way homie

what do you think of people who have therapists? pretty brave, my parents think i need one but i could never

do you have any of those adult coloring books? no I hate coloring

ever ridden an elephant? no

deserts: dreary or beautiful?   dreary

ever seen a panda?   like once I think

what kind a camera do you have?   I only have my phone

do you have stretch marks? where? don’t be shy, they’re tiger stripes! no

lobsters: cool or scary? i pet one once

opposoms: total vermin or cute? what

what tv channel dominated your childhood?   idk

ever actually seen a snake in the wild? my friend stepped on one when we were little holy fuckk

have you ever had a PET snake? what kind? no

ever had an encounter with a snapping turtle? they’re scary! no

do you like oatmeal? no

wherever you live, have you ever seen your national bird? yes

ever had a reptile as a pet that you had to feed crickets? no i got cats

ever play hearthstone? no but I know a guy named Hearthstone :)

ever gone hunting? biggest thing you’ve ever shot?   no

how about fishing? biggest thing you’ve ever caught?   MY DAD IS OBSESSED WITH FISHING HE HAS SPECIAL KAYAKS FOR IT AND EVERYTHING. But sometimes ill go fishing (like never) I caught some fish before

coolest place you’ve ever been fishing?   santa cruz is my life

which is cooler: african or asian elephant? I didn't know there was a difference

craziest thing you’ve ever eaten? nothing

what’s in a camel’s back? Idk ask the camel

steve irwin: foolish for messing around with animals or brave for teaching us? who dat

what do you think of people who put their whole life on social media? fine with me if they put up there credit card info :)

don’t you think it’s a bit deceptive to wear a push-up bra?   idc

do you truly believe we came from chimps? not from chimps but from earlier ancestors of them

well, what do you think of extra bones and even organs in our bodies? why do we have them?   people are just sometimes born like that

if you could choose anyone to be your father, who would it be? Han Solo

weirdest video game you’ve ever played? hmm gta v is weird for how inappropriate it can get sometimes even tho its the best game ever but probably sims 3

we’re having a pig-pickin’! whatcha eating? a what

ever been on a scary hay ride? no

ever been to a castle?   I went to Hearst Castle once

what’s your favorite kind of penguin? club penguin :) (ive never played before tho) rip

whales. should they be allowed in sea world? NO

ever seen an albino? whether it be human or animal?   yes

what do you think of the song “miss jackson” by panic! at the disco? omg have I never heard of that song whats wrong with me

what is the wallpaper on your best friends cell phone? my old bestfriend has a picture of her and new best friend, isnt that great haha fuck me

do you feel comfortable singing in front of others? depends :)

do you like using big words when you talk? No i dont know many big words

do you EVER use caps lock? NO WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

are you loud when you’re having sex? well idk

have you ever wanted to drop out of school? i probably will want to in high school

when was the last time you watched south park? never

are you italian? nope

are you interested in photography at all? only in gta v

any survey takers that annoy you on tumblr? no

do you like bob marley? ive never heard any of his stuff

can you talk to your parents about anything without them judging or bickering at you? I never can or do

are you interested in art? sketch my life away

don’t you think we’re spending too much money on exploring the mere theory of climate change? No but when the worlds flooding they wont regret it haha

everyone always wants to know your favorite animal. what’s your SECOND favorite? I always say cats are my favorite but i also love chickens

who’s your favorite disney character? none

have you ever taken the eharmony personality quiz? no

do you take vitamins? if so, what kinds? idk

how much was your prom dress? what’s the most you’d spend? hahahahahahahaha kill me

would you marry someone of a different religion? ehh.. im not religious and i could never go to church every sunday so maybe not..

how did you learn the word “fuck”? my parents swear a lot

if you could make one of your enemies your best friend, who would it be? id rather stay enemies thank you very much

what is the last movie you saw in theaters? Spiderman Homecoming

have you ever got into a wreck?   not serious

do you think you are an argumentative person? yeah and i lose friends because of it :)

can you admit when you’re wrong?   all the time

are you easily confused? yeah people yell at me for it

do you think you would make a good wife/husband?  

probably not

have you ever caught a butterfly?   hey I used to be afraid of butterflies so no

have you ever deliberately tried to get someone drunk? no

do you like being kissed on the neck? never been kissed so yeah

favorite song by the band the offspring? never heard of them

how many times each morning do you press the snooze button? never had to, ever

when you go out to eat, what sides do your order with your food? idk

what video game or computer game are you best at? GTA V Online, ive become so good from 4 years of experience people think im a modder, fuck all those bitches, but its really funny when they think I can just drop money for them, id love to be a modder but I dont want to get banned

how do you normally come across new music? friends or the radio

what subject in school do you feel is the least necessary? science and english and history even though i love history

do you enjoy power outages or do you get annoyed? i dont care

are you pretty politically correct? kinda

have you ever behaved like a stalker?   no i have no idea what you are talking about :)

do you appreciate other people’s opinions?   depends on who

if you could pick your own pet name, what would it be?   I named my cat Bub so there

do you care what’s going on in the world? If it hurts me, yes

how many partners is too many? at one time, one is good but if youve had a lot in your life time i lose respect

do you examine the tissue after you blow your nose?   no

do you prefer boys to shave down there? uh..

how much does your mother know about your sex life (or lack thereof)? im 14 wtf

are any of your siblings married? what are their spouse’s names?   No but I think my sister is married to Finn Wolfhard

have you ever had a pet bird?   no

how many times have you moved in your lifetime? once

if you could get one piercing and one tattoo, where would you want them?   ahh only if it didn't hurt id get a red triangle on my right wrist (gotta be like ellie goulding) and a piercing? nose? maybe

would you consider yourself to be adventurous?   yes i love to adventure but no one ever wants to come with me :’(

has any part of your house ever been flooded?   no

is there anyone that you’re worried about right now? who and why? yeah, I cant say though. Their friend told me about some stuff

if you won a lot of money, would you donate any of it? to what organization would you donate it?                                                                 

idk

describe the best friend you’ve ever had, or the best person you’ve ever known.   ive been friends with her for about 10 years and we've been fighting for months and ive finally come to realize she cares about me a lot more than I do about myself and she is really worried about me ever doing anything with myself. Ive just been really down with myself these past months

have you ever adopted a stray animal?   maybe

what time did you wake up this morning?   8:28 dont ask how I remebered

ever wonder if you’re someone’s everything? yeah but I know that it’ll never happen but like theres this one person id give my life for (just one person) she knows who she is

would you ever bleach your hair platinum blonde? like once ok stop it

what is your mom’s middle name?   Lei

do you know the color of your ex boyfriend/girlfriend’s eyes? n/a

have you had your wisdom teeth out?   no

your appendix?   no