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#anywayyy sorry for the long absence! it will happen again
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theruseandthecaper · 6 months
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me pulling back up to Tumblr after being gone for like a year hi guys sorry again for the absence but if y'all have been following me for a while u definitely know this happens a lot. im in college now and have been so busy I haven't had much time to check my blog but I miss it so hi!! ive been thinking, sometimes it can be a bit much to write out a full fic like ive done in the past so y'all can now request headcanons!!! my head is filled with stupid nonsensical thoughts about fictional characters so ill be able to get those out quicker. alsooo for the person who sent me an ask saying that my anon asks are off, I turned those on!! sorry I am a tumblr noob and didn't know how to turn those on. anywayyy im back (for now LMAo no promises I won't disappear again) and ill try to get to writing some stuff <3 I hope everyone is doing well!!
just to update y'all about my life in case anyone cares, things have been so amazing lately?? senior year ended shittily cuz I lost my whole friend group but they were toxic asf anyway LOL im medicated now, in college, can drive, have an incredible job that I adore, and things are rlly great! ive never been this happy for this long and its so nice to finally feel like the beacon of positivity I try to be. also I deleted TikTok. this may or may not have been a catalyst in my mental health improving. anyway
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4jimin · 7 years
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Let The Walls Break Down | 3
CHAPTER III: Restart | crossposted on ao3 Summary:  I look at you, and I'm so fucked up, because I know it's love. A/N:  hello, cutie pies~ so this one has taken a while, and i'm rly sorry for those who were waiting, it's just that... things in my life are rly crazy right now, so i can't find the inspiration to write :/ applying to an university can be rly hard i hate growing up :( anywayyy, this one is just rly fluffy and cute – unfortunately for the pain lovers hahahah – but i rly hope everyone enjoys it bc let's be honest, we all need a little of lovey dovey in our life, right? for everyone who is keeping up with me, leaving kudos and commenting on the chapters, i'm rly so so thankful and i truly love you for that, i hope i don't let you down and that you enjoy <3 i have to apologize in advance because this one is shorter than the others, but!!! i have a good reason: i just couldnt bring myself to mix all this cuteness with the sexual tension that's yet to come akhsdkhf i'm sorry but i hope you don't give up on me for that lmao okay, i'll stop talking, thank you again, and as always feedback is much appreciated <3 p.s: i forgot to say before but this whole thing is developing before inu era, in the beginning of 2015, just to make things clearer Length: 5,4k words
The apartment was freezing. Violent gusts of a cold wind were entering the room through the open windows, startling Taehyung. He woke up alarmed and hurried to close them, feeling all of his body hairs bristling. His bare feet touching the gelid ground, caused shivers through his entire body. He rubbed his swollen eyes trying to understand what had happened, still in a small sleepy trance. As his thoughts settled, Taehyung's eyes landed on Jimin's bed. Oh... He's back... After a long yawn, he found his way back to his bed in the darkness and checked the time on his phone. 2:48 A.M. A weary sigh escaped his lips as he remembered he had to be up by five. Taehyung snuggled himself between his blankets again, when something on Jimin's bed caught his attention. Jiminie, you're not that big... Wait... What– Aish, seriously? A smile formed on his lips. He turned around to the wall side and fell asleep thinking of ways to mock his two best friends – sleeping in the bed by the side of his own – on the next day.
••••
Jimin felt a familiar, yet, strange warmth next to him. He was sleeping alone for the past month, so the sensation of another body glued to his caused him a slight surprise. Tae tae? But those arms around his waist did not belong to Taehyung. Jimin's breath slowly got caught up in his throat, while he brushed his fingers through the arm's veins of the person hugging his waist and assimilated who they belonged to. He took the tender touch down to Jungkook's fingers and delicately held his hand. Jimin closed his eyes remembering all the moments from last night and allowed himself to sigh relieved. It wasn't like all of his problems had suddenly disappeared, but the constant weight tiring his shoulders – which followed him day and night in the last month – wasn't there anymore. Jungkook's breath was rhythmically tickling his neck, making him feel butterflies on his belly. Jimin pretended not to notice. He didn't want to fall in that trap again. The room was dark and cold, thanks to the sun's absence outside. In the most delicate way Jimin managed, he got rid of Jungkook's hug and got out of bed, being successful at the attempt of not waking him up. For a moment, he lost himself observing the younger boy calmly breath, his face tender and in peace. Jimin smiled. His eyes traveled through the traces of Jungkook's face – much more mature than the first time Jimin saw him –, and he felt something awkward on his chest. Jungkook was growing up fast. His childish characteristics were slowly disappearing and being replaced by puberty. Jimin didn't know how that made him feel. He was pride of being able to witness his beloved doengsang getting mature, but he was also emotional by thinking that Jungkook wasn't going to be Bangtan's baby anymore. He wasn't going to be anyone's baby anymore. Not even his. He was slowly becoming an adult. Aish, what am I? A mother? Jimin got rid of his reveries at the same time a high and irritating noise filled the whole place. He followed the sound till Taehyung's bed and turned off the screaming alarm on his phone. It was five in the morning. Jimin streched his spine thinking about their schedule for that day. Two interviews, one photoshoot and the recording of some parts of their new MV. "Jiminie?" Taehyung's muffled voice reached his ears, "What time is it?" He had his face buried in a pillow. Jimin almost laughed. Instead, he crouched down by his best friend's side and slighly messed his hair, answering in a low tone to not wake the others, "Time to get up, you lazy ass." Taehyung lifted his head up just enough for only his swollen eyes to be seen. "Just more five minutes?", his voice was deep and rough, but yet, he still managed to sound like a five year old boy. Jimin caressed his hair before getting up while saying "fine, fine" in a false defeated tone. He left the bedroom looking for his own phone – which was found resting on the kitchen's balcony. Yoongi was sitting in one of the chairs with a mug and a plate full of toasts covered in jelly. "Good morning, hyung." Jimin greeted him, heading to the fridge's direction. "Hey." he heard Yoongi saying, while he looked for the milk, "What time did you come back yesterday? We went to sleep and you two hadn't arrived yet." Jimin was thinking of an answer, when Yoongi added laughing: "What type of running did you two go for?" Jimin blushed. "We got lost by the way." he lied. Kind of. Yoongi took the chance for a – shitty – metaphor. "I hope you've found it again." Jimin laughed softly. "What is this? Namjoon-hyung is namjoonizing you, be careful." Yoongi looked pretty damn offended and pretended to feel chills. "If I wasn't clear enough, I was being sarcastic, okay?" he tried to sound indifferent, but a smile resided on his lips, "You look better." "Huh?" Jimin finished filling his bowl with milk and went to the balcony, sitting in front of Yoongi, "You think?" "Yeah." he bit his toast and chewed it in silence observing Jimin eat his chocolate cereal. Jimin was about to ask him to stop looking at him in that embarrassing way, when the whole apartment heard Hoseok's voice giving good morning to... Well, everyone. Just to make it clear: At once. "Good morning, sunshines!!!!" he screamed from his bedroom and Jimin felt thankful he wasn't there anymore. A minute later, he came out carrying both Jungkook and Taehyung out with a huge and bright smile on his face. How could someone be like that at five in the morning? Jung Hoseok wasn't a normal human being, Jimin had just declared official. It wasn't possible to say the same about the other two, that looked more like two walking zombies than actual sleepy human beings. Jimin's heart skipped a bit by glancing Jungkook awake. He stuffed more cereal in his mouth and looked away, even though the younger was walking with closed eyes. "Are they sleeping for real? You're really the worst... With this innocent smile... Waking them up in the worst possible way... Tsc, tsc." Yoongi pretented to scold Hoseok, that seemed truly offended. "What are you saying? I woke them up with lots and lots of love and that's why they're here. Right, boys?" "I asked you five more minutes, hyung." Taehyung whined by his side. Well, in Hoseok's defense, the other five minutes he asked Jimin had already passed. "But you jumped on me, like this,” he exemplified throwing all of his weight on Hoseok, "without even listening to me... You're heavy... I'm sleepy..." he continued to complain, now with his eyes closed and walking till the sofa. Jimin chuckled. There he goes again... Taehyung snuggled up on the couch, ready to sleep again. Jungkook, on the other hand, seemed to be really sleeping standing. Jimin gathered enough courage to look at him, but the boy's head was hanging to his chest and for a moment he looked to get unbalanced, which startled him and made his eyes go wide. Jimin searched for more cereal to fill his mouth, wanting a subject of distraction, but the bowl was empty. He sighed, not knowing what to do. Jungkook sat by his side a moment later, making his whole body freeze. How should I act? How does he expect me to act? What do I do, what do I do? "Morn–" He started shyly, but Jungkook was fast in dropping his asleep head on the table. He was snoring.
••••
Okay, so maybe things were a bit awkward. They were back talking and Jungkook was even giving a try at light teasing Jimin with subtle jokes and touchs, but things were a little different when they were left all alone. At the first time, Jimin thought they were only tired – so that was the reason for the uncomfortable silence – and that he was the only one feeling odd in that atmosphere. But then, at the second time, Jimin tried to initiate a conversation. An easy conversation, such as “hey, have you got your makeup done?”, but Jungkook weirdly answered a “mhmm, da... yes?” and ran out of the room at the very same second. So no, he was not the only one feeling odd. And he soon found out the reason why: the two of them were shamelessly pretending nothing happened at all. All the drama of the other night, the tears shed, the muffled apologies between the hugs and the actual backhug to sleep? Nah. They were totally ignoring the whole reason of why they were back talking again and they were simply talking again. And here it was why it was odd: all of this, should have led to getting the both of them closer (what the actual fuck, Jungkook said I love you to Jimin out loud), but thanks to their dumbness, they were acting all shy and embarrassed, which was getting Jimin frustrated. For real, they didn’t go through all that shitty moments to end up here blushing and running away from each other. “Jungkook is not talking with me.” he pouted. “Hah? What do you mean? I saw you two sleeping together last night!” Taehyung said, surprising Jimin. “We didn’t– Okay, maybe we... Anyway, yes, we're talking again, but... It's weird. It feels weird, I don’t know.” “Are you asking me for advice? I don’t even know why the two of you fought before.” Jimin sighed. “It was stupid. We're stupid. It wasn’t like...” he didn’t know how to put it into words – and to be honest, he didn’t even want to, because somehow, it still hurt a little, “We both had our fair share of fault, I think, so... It wasn’t like he hurt me on purpose or anything...” Taehyung looked at him dumbfounded. “What? Are you telling me he wasn’t the dickhead and you weren't the victim?! But how so, if you were crying your heart out that night in the hotel?!” Jimin shuffled uncomfortably on his seat. “Well... Aish, why is this important, really? I don’t wanna talk about it...” he scratched the back of his head to have another thing to worry about “And that wasn’t even the reason why I came here, to begin wi–” “It is important because if he wasn’t the dick and neither were you, then I was!” Jimin gave him a confused look. “What are you talking about?” “Aish...” Taehyung held his head on his hands “Sorry Chim, but I need to apologize to Jungkookie.” and just like this, he ran away, leaving Jimin alone and clueless. “Hey! Taehyung!” he called for him, but the boy just waved at him like “talk to you later”. Jimin snorted irritated. He wanted help and Taehyung gave him shit. “What's up? Tae abandoned you?” Jin appeared by his side with his necktie in hand. “Kind of...” Jimin looked up at his hyung and smiled at the sight of the boy struggling to get his tie right, “Need help, hyung?” “Maybe.” Jin sat next to him and let Jimin finish the job of tying the thing for him. “Mhmm... Hyung?” Jin didn’t answer but he looked Jimin in the eyes to show him he was listening, “Can I ask you something?” Jimin carefully passed the tip of the tie through the hole he created while talking. “Of course.” the older boy gave Jimin his best attentive eyes, because Jimin seemed to be choosing his words carefully, so Jin deduced it was an important thing. “If you... Had a fight with someone...” he successfully finished tying the necktie and let his hands fell between them with a little sigh, “And, like– This has nothing to do with me, okay? It's just that a friend asked me for advice and I have no idea what to say... Anyway... You had a fight, but everything is fine now, because everyone apologized, okay? Okay... But what should I– my friend do if even after everyone apologized, things are still awkward between the... people who fought? “Mhmm...” Jin looked up to represent him thinking “Are you asking me how to break the ice?” “No! I mean, yes, but... Not like that...” Jimin pouted at his failure of expressing the situation he was currently in. It was frustrating. “Regardless of the situation, you can always use this, it's 100% effective!” Jin cleaned his throat with a cough, “What did the ocean say to the shore?” “Oh no, hyung, not the dad jokes…” Jimin helplessly covered his face with his hands, showing all the love he had for his hyung's jokes. But Jin didn’t say a thing, so he knew it was useless to fight, “...what?” “Nothing. It just waved.” he answered already laughing that squeaky and loud laugh of his mid-way the joke. Jimin tried forcing his own laugh it in, but he couldn't make it. The laugh came out against his will and he whined out of frustration. I need more useful members. “Hyung...” “No, wait, wait! There's another! Oh, this one is pretty good, you're gonna love it.” Jin did The Dad Pose with his forearm resting on his thigh and gave him an expectant look, “What do you call a group of killer whales playing instruments?” Jimin was in silence, mortifiedly looking at him, but already fighting a smile, “An Orca-stra.” Jimin cracked. “Okay, no, I'm leaving.” he got up from his chair, “Hyung... Laughing at your jokes hurts my pride.”
••••
The group had just finished the second interview, when they were rushed to the place where the mv would be recorded. Jimin wanted some time alone with Jungkook – even though it was useless, since he still didn’t know what to do to make things less awkward –, but they were only seeming to get more and more apart. The photoshoot had been the first thing to get done in the morning, so that recording was their last responsibility of the day – kind of – and Jimin couldn’t wait for it to get finished. They weren't going to shoot everything at once, anyway, so hopefully it wouldn't take too long. When it finally ended – the sky already dark blue –, he almost thanked the heavens. He was tired, yes, but now that they had nothing more to do – apart from practice, of course –, he was free to try solving things out with Jungkook. Damn, he wanted things to get back normal again, okay? When they arrived at the studio, everyone headed at once to the showers to take a good bath after the long day, but there were only five of them, so Jimin and Jungkook were left waiting. “I'm older!” Jimin had said to the two months younger boy. “I know, Jiminie, but… Please…” Taehyung gave him the puppy eyes. Dirty. He knew Jimin was weak for the puppy eyes. “Fine.” he let out rolling his eyes in a pseudo irritation. And that was it. To be very honest, he only gave in, because he realized that was the chance he needed to be alone with Jungkook a little. In fact, in that moment, he was alone with Jungkook. Each one in a corner of the room looking at their phone's screen in a complete silence. “Hey… Jungkook…” Jimin tried, not taking his eyes off his phone. “Yes, hyung?” Jungkook quickly looked up at him. Jimin closed his eyes wanting to punch himself. He couldn’t believe he was actually going to do that. “So… You know…” Jimin looked at him, ignoring the flush on his cheeks, “What did the ocean say to the killer whales? Wait, what. No! Shit.” Jimin looked away, “How do you call an ocean waving to the shore? No! Fuck! That's not it, wait.” Now the will of punching himself in the face was the minor of all his personal issues if compared to his will to bury himself in the fucking earth's core. He couldn’t believe he appealed to a goddamn dad joke and completely messed it up. Who does that? But Jungkook was laughing. Really laughing. With his eyes disappearing and crinkling in the corner while his body curved forward. Jimin was in a trance for a moment, just appreciating the sound coming out of the younger's mouth and watching his nose scrunch in that adorable way only Jungkook could do. “Hyung..." the maknae looked at him with eyes sparkling and that beautiful bunny smile, making Jimin blush, "Are you really dad joking me?” Jimin couldn’t be more offended. “What? Well, yes, but–“ “Why are you so offended if it's true?!” that only made Jungkook laugh more and well, fuck, Jimin was laughing too, because yeah, it was kinda funny. “I can’t believe you actually managed to mess up a dad joke, hyung, this is iconic.” Jungkook looked at him with those warm eyes embellishing his face and Jimin almost melted. “Hey, how do you call the ocean waving to the shore?” he imitated Jimin's voice in a lame tone, which made both of them fall in an even louder laughing. “Shut up! I totally don't sound like this!” “Shut up! I totally don’t sound like this!” Jungkook did it again in a further lame way and now Jimin was almost falling from his chair, the laugh completely taking over his body and making his tummy ache. “You're stupid.” Jimin told him while trying to catch his breath. “But you're smiling.” Jungkook pointed out with a light red hue painting his ears and cheeks. Jimin rolled his eyes still with that ridiculous smile on his face. “Yeah…”
••••
Jungkook once watched an anime that talked about equivalent exchange – and even though it was an alchemy's fiction and such, Jungkook totally believed in its concept. So much he brought it to his reality. The most famous quote of the animation was something among the lines of “you can't win anything without losing something first”. You know, this here it's a paraphrase, but the idea still lives on it. Jungkook believed that in order to have good moments, the sad moments needed to come first. He didn’t know if he was right, but that was how things always worked for him in his life, so maybe he kinda was. One example was what it was happening with Jimin. They fought, got hurt, stopped talking for a pretty long time and yes, it had been terrible, but now, they were closer than ever. Jimin was resting his head on Jungkook’s chest, while watching a cheesy drama. Jungkook could feel his hot breath on his skin through the fabric of his tshirt. After a few minutes, Jungkook's hand was tangled in Jimin's hair without him even realizing when it happened. He was there playing with it and softly caressing the top of his head, when he felt it slowly dropping a little to the side. Jungkook smiled, because he realized Jimin had just slept. He stayed there though, hands on Jimin's hair and Jimin's body warming his own. They were glued to each other and Jungkook couldn’t feel more at ease. He was breathing Jimin's scent, which was very probably – and happily – going to stick to his clothes for the rest of the day. It was sweet and it smelled like flowers. Jungkook buried his face on Jimin's hair, wanting to feel more of it. He deeply breathed in and the smell made funny things to his stomach. He left no room to think about what that meant, though. He didn’t want things to get weird again. His left arm was starting to tingle because of the position he was in, but Jungkook didn’t allow himself to move. Jimin was peacefully sleeping and Jungkook would do the possible to keep him that way. He wasn’t really seeing Jimin's face, but he imagined he was with his beautiful lips a bit open, with the side of his face that was in touch with Jungkook's chest all crumpled in a very cute way. He grinned thinking about it. Jimin was really cute, even though he was older. He had a tiny nose, soft cheeks and small fingers. Sometimes when he was talking, his lips formed a little pout making his voice sound childish – but not in a bad way, in an adorable way. Jungkook sighed and ignored the pain starting to grow in the middle of his spine, still playing with the fluffiness of Jimin's hair. Jimin woke up when the movie had just ended. He looked up with puffy eyes and swollen lips, so Jungkook did the possible to fight a smile. The left side of his face was marked with the folds of Jungkook’s tshirt, which just made his confused expression look cuter. “Did I sleep?” he asked in a deep and raspy voice. Jungkook felt a little shiver run through his spine, but he laughed it away. “Yes.” he took the chance to change positions and strech his painful back. “Is the movie good?” Jimin rubbed his face, trying to fully wake up. “Great.” Jungkook lied. He couldn’t say he passed the whole time staring at the top of his head thinking about him, could he? “Damn. I'm sorry, I missed it.” “It's okay.” Jungkook smiled. Jimin was still looking at him with his eyes partially open and with his mouth – Jungkook realized in a jolt – dangerously close. His heart raced ridiculously like it always did when his attention was directed to Jimin's lips and he suddenly asked himself who already had kissed those lips. He felt uneasy out of nowhere. The memory of Jimin making out with that girl invaded his mind. Jungkook closed his eyes in order to make it go away. But... Their lips touching, their tongues– “Hey, what you thinking?” Jimin whispered on his face. Jungkook opened his eyes just to meet a worried face staring back at him. He shuffled uncomfortably under Jimin, but he kept his hand on the older's back – holding him still –, because he liked that warmth so close to him. “You know, hyung...” Jungkook didn’t know why he was about to ask this, “W-who was the first person you kissed?”, but he did. Jimin wided his eyes with a slight surprise from that unexpected question. He opened his mouth to answer a few times, but fell in silence in all of them. Jungkook felt a knot on his chest, so he hurried to apologize. “I'm sorry, you don’t have to answer, that was stu–“ “A girl from my class.” Jimin cut him off and looked away. He supported his face on his hands, resting on Jungkook’s chest. “I liked her, but she didn’t. Her friends forced her to kiss me. Aish, that was embarrassing.” Jimin hid his face for a moment, “I didn’t know back then, so when I found out I apologized to her.” Jimin explained, and added in a lower tone, “I also told her to find new friends, because... Who does that?” “But it wasn’t your fault, you didn’t have to apologize!” Jungkook was shocked and pissed for Jimin. What shitty friends, to be honest. “Of course I did!” Jimin lifted his head to look at Jungkook, and he realized Jimin's lips were doing the pout thing, “I liked her and they knew that, that's why they forced her to do it! It was my fault...” “Hyung, of course not!” Jungkook was getting mad. Why was Jimin blaming himself for a bad thing other people did? “You can't be guilty for liking someone! And even if you didn’t, other people would like her, and their friends would do the exact same thing!” Jungkook realized his voice was louder than he initially intended, but he couldn’t help it. It was unfair for Jimin to carry this guilt with him if he was innocent. Jimin seemed to take a moment to think about it. “Yes, but... Still...” “There's no still! Or but!” Jungkook said with his brows furrowed, “It's not your fault...” Jimin smiled that smile that made his eyes disappear and Jungkook tried really hard to not gasp for air. “Okay, okay...” he said with a small voice, “And... What about you?” Jungkook was caught off guard. “M-me?” he stuttered. “No, idiot, me. Of course it's you!” Jungkook thought about it. He was nervous to answer. Not because of the subject itself – he had already talked about it with Taehyung and it had been a normal conversation –, but because it was Jimin who was listening. “It was a-also a girl from my class...” Stop stammering, idiot. “There's nothing big about it, but... I didn’t really like her. It was just that she confessed to me and everyone else had already kissed, so I thought 'better be with someone that likes me' and...” Jungkook had no problem telling Taehyung this, but now he was blushing and feeling guilty, “It was selfish, I know, and I kind of used her, I think, but I... I... Don’t know what to say, I felt sorry later, but she didn’t study on the same school anymore and...” “Jungkookie, it's okay.” Jimin interrupted him, “You don’t have to excuse yourself. It's okay.” he warmly smiled and Jungkook felt that warmth spreading through his whole body, “We do some mistakes as we live, but it's okay, I guess... Don't worry too much about it... In the end, aren’t we all using each other for our own happiness, anyway?” Jimin looked away supporting his head on his hand again. They were both in silence now, but Jungkook was too excited and happy he was getting to know new things about Jimin. He told himself that was the reason why he so naturally – and let's say, in a dizzy state of mind – asked, “Hyung, and what about boys?” But actually hearing those words resounding through the room made him regret at the exact same second they came out. “Huh?” Jimin looked at him again, probably asking himself if he heard right, “Boys?” Jimin asked to make sure, and that was the chance he needed to say 'forget it' and move on to another topic, but he stuttered a 'yes' instead. “What about boys?” “H-have you ever kissed them?” Jungkook heart was beating in his throat now, and the living room was drowning in silence. It probably lasted five seconds, but it felt like an eternity for Jungkook. Jimin's face was being illuminated by the orange glow from the sunshine's dawn entering the window behind them, when he answered, lowering his eyes: “Yes...” Jungkook could have ended the conversation there and moved on, but he wanted to know. He needed to know. He wasn’t really understanding that urge of finding out about Jimin's personal life, but it was completely swallowing him up. “How was...it...?” Jimin was looking at him with fond eyes, which made Jungkook feel more comfortable and secure to ask the questions he wanted – it was a 'go ahead' kind of fond eyes. “The first time?" “Well... yeah.” Jungkook answered while wondering how many times could have happened. How many people could have touched Jimin's lips in such an intimate way? Jungkook didn’t understand why, but thinking about it – which led him to imagine it – made his stomach sink. He realized he was staring at Jimin's lips, so he averted his gaze. Jimin sighed. “We used to dance together. We were from the same academy, but we weren’t classmates. One day, the professor decided to take the best from each class and form pairs to create choreographys. He said it was for approximating the students or something... Anyway, we started practicing together, some times alone and some times not... I... was shy at first, but he was nice and easy to talk to, so we were getting along well as time went by...” Jimin wasn’t looking at Jungkook – he was blankly staring at the ground like he could see all of those memories before his eyes. Jungkook felt a tip of jealousy bothering him, “He was older too, and better than me, so he helped me with some dance moves. One day... It was night already, but we were still practicing, because the performance was on the other day and... I was really nervous, so I was doing a lot of mistakes. He noticed it, paused the music and sat down in silence.” Jimin smiled, “I asked 'what are you doing?' and he lied saying 'wahh, I'm so tired, let's take a break.'" he smirked softly, "Idiot... Anyway, he was my hyung, so I just nooded and sat too, but he started talking and playing with me, and when I realized we were sitting really close to each other laughing about stupid things and I had even forgot about the performance... I think that was what he was trying to do the entire time, to be honest... But... You know when you're talking with someone and suddenly things just go quiet? So... That happened and... I was looking at the ground, but he was looking at me and getting closer. I got nervous and didn’t know what to do or what was happening, so he said 'Jimin...' and made me look up. He said 'I think I'm going to kiss you, so if you don't want to, stop me.'” Jimin sighed one more time and Jungkook got scared he could feel his heart fastly beating in his chest, “But I didn’t. I didn’t stop him and he kissed me. It was gentle and sweet and also nice, so it made me wonder if I liked guys too... Yeah... That's it.” he laughed shyly a little, “Aish, I talked too much, this is embarrassing...” “Do you?” Jungkook asked thinking that breathing got a little harder since Jimin started telling his story. “What?” “Like guys too.” Jimin looked away. “Well, yes... At least, I thought so back then... Now I know I only like guys.” Jungkook met Jimin's eyes again, “Is there a problem?” he cautiously asked. “No!” Jungkook hurried in saying. “I'm sorry.” he didn’t know why he was apologizing, “There's not, I'm sorry...” well, deep down, he kinda did. “But... What happened after?” Jungkook told himself he just wanted to know out of curiosity. “Well, we performed. I made no mistakes. And then, I left to Seoul.” Jungkook quietly nooded. “I see...” There was still another question bothering him, but he was scared to ask, so he just stayed in silence chewing on his bottom lip. His hand was sweating on Jimin's back so he took it off. “What is it?” Jimin sweetly asked. How did he do this? Jungkook said nothing, but it was still like Jimin could read him like a letter. He was about to answer 'nothing', but instead he asked: “Did you like him?” And here it was why it was bothering him: he didn’t want to hear the answer. If Jungkook was to be honest with himself, he would have to admit he didn’t really need to ask to know it. It just needed for Jimin to start talking about it, for him to realize. It just needed for Jungkook to look at Jimin blushing and looking away right now, to understand it. But the thing was, Jungkook was the master of lying to himself. So he needed to hear it. “Yes.” and even though he knew it, it still hurt, “I didn’t know back then, but I do now.” Jimin smiled at him, “But it's past. I have all of you to love now.” his eyes did the crescent moon thing. Jungkook's heart clutched in his chest. He was so cute. “It's not the same!” Jungkook told him, even though he knew Jimin was aware of that. “Hah?” the dork did a disbeliefed tone, “What you talking about? I thought it was already pretty clear that I'm marrying aaall of you.” he said like it was the most obvious thing. “Stop joking around!” Jungkook scolded him smiling. He didn’t know why hearing that made him happy, but, somehow, it did. Jimin tickled him. “I'm not!” Jungkook tickled him back. “Yes, you are!” They got into a tickle fight, just to finish it three minutes later with Jungkook screaming for mercy, “Fine, fine, you won! I give up, hyung, stop!” They were both laughing and trying to catch their breaths, when Taehyung appeared out of nowhere and joined them to watch the drama – now replaying on the tv. Before Jungkook realized, everyone else was snuggled around them with popcorn and stuff, making the place feel all warm and cozy. He smiled, feeling so much like home.
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