#but he totally should have expected it

[butchcharliee]

<]:D

#yall my dad actually asked me #do you want me to call you by charlie? #.!?!?@?!? #UM HOLY SHIT?! #i was not expecting him to ask me that #so he's 100% accepting of my chosen name #i was so flustered when he asked that #so then i told him he should introduce me to people as charlie and he said of course! #:0??????? #i thought I'd get a negative response to that but he's totally ok with it :0 #he even said he'll always be accepting to whatever how i identify as :0000 #so now i feel a lot better about telling him i want top surgery lol #but baby steps #anyways that made me so happy :') #im grateful to have a dad like him!

[prussianvenom]

Imo Wyll should have also gotten a tail when mizora tieflinged him

#baldurs gate 3 #wyll ravengard #he should have also kept his beautiful brown eyes #but just horns? it feels imbalanced #i see horns i expect tail #also because he totally would like wrap it around his s/o or intertwine it with someone elses #how cute would it be if him and karlach held tails #do you guys understand #my vision

[dontgofarfromme]

Incredibly fucking insane how well the Wit fits as an allegory for queerness. Burrich's harsh rejection of Fitz and Swift for it, the simultaneous automatic learned reaction of disgust and the fear at learning he has a child who could face real danger because of it, the multitude of ways he misunderstands and refuses to understand the way the Wit functions in order to keep his views. His "I've tried many years to purge it from myself. Still, it lingers. But if it cannot be purged from a man, he can nevertheless be taught to refuse it. Just as a man must learn to refuse all other sorts of vices." The damage to his relationship with first Fitz because of his inability to accept thar Fitz not only has but continues to use the Wit. The way Fitz eventually embraces his Wit but is always careful, so so careful and so worried for people like Swift, who flaunt it. Web's "there are other types of neglect and deprivation. To deny what unfolds in someone...to say to a child 'you must not be what you are.' That is wrong." It's just!! All over the fucking place!!!

#realm of the elderlings #reason 72938372929 why its utterly incomprehensible that hobb intended to write fitz as a straight man #like excuse me ma'am #u cant queer code this mans entire life and then expect me to believe u when u say he could never be into dudes #also burrich is so clearly and painfully wrong here but i find him so interesting #he gives valmiki from valmikis daughter vibes when jt comes to this topic #a reference that is totally incomprehensible to 99% of people but which i am correct abt #also just the damage done to his and fitz relationship and how bitter things are after #the way they talk around the wit even once they mend their relationship in the first series because even if he loves fitz #he still still cannot accept it #that like quiet pain of not being rejected in whole but having someone who should love all of you but refuses to #IDK!!!!

[roobylavender]

(Really long ask ahead i’m sorry!) I think your thoughts on dick and his similarities vs differences to bruce are so interesting! Personally i’m wondering how much of NTT played an influence on this kind of characterization bc i’ve never fully finished ntt but i read like nearly all the pre-80s batman 1940 issues lol and dick very much was portrayed as more idealistic than bruce in some ways while more no-nonsense (? For lack of better word) in other ways, like when it comes to batman easing up a little on selina for romance reasons LOL. Though ofc dick totally turns into - well, a dick - in team books, as i grow older i find myself far more compelled by a potential story of an 18 yr old who seemed to have the whole weight of the world on his shoulders (by his own perception) and breaking under his own impractically strong sense of duty and sky-high expectations for others, then realizing as he grows older that it doesn’t have to be that way esp after seeing the perspectives of characters like kory, wally, joey, roy, etc. Like personally as someone who never really had a huge interest in NTT anyway, i’m surprised at how desperately people want to hold on to the characterization of dick when he was 18-19 and never letting him grow past that, like it’s so difficult for me to believe that at age 25 he would be the same uptight controlling kid that he was at 19. Maybe i’m biased though bc i was like one of those insufferable INTJ internet stereotypes as a teenager, and while that worldview did bring me achievements i’m proud of like the fact that i’m in med school rn studying what i love, i still know that at age 22 i have changed SO much from when i was 18 and i can’t imagine any reasonably mature or normally-functioning person (let alone someone high-functioning like dick) not doing the same lol. Especially since dick is the kind of person who would literally die if he’s not constantly growing and evolving past his faults bc of his insufferable perfectionism, idk how he’d be willfully blind to the negative effects of his worldview in early NTT and refuse to grow from there. He even has a quote that’s like “i’ve spent years as a student of my own behavior” which i always found highly encouraging bc i know he really does want to improve himself even at his worst. It reminds me of that Marcus Aurelius quote: “if someone can prove me wrong and show me my mistake in any thought or action, i shall gladly change. I seek the truth, which never harmed anyone; the harm is to persist in one’s own self-deception and ignorance.” But what are your thoughts? (Thank you for reading all this 🥹)

oh i absolutely agree! i cannot tell you how many times i think about the person i was a couple years ago and who i am now like i cringe so much omg.. maturity is an ever persistent process even if we don't recognize its effects immediately and it absolutely is crazy to think that anyone would remain in such a static state of mind for several years on end. esp when like you said dick is someone who wants to be better! so despite his several hypocrisies it is nonetheless in his best interests to look internally and analyze and evolve. and i feel like that very much could have happened had there been any actual segue between dick's breakup with kory and his re-entry into the batfam. i don't think there was much of a connection between these two sets of writers at all and so what you got is what felt like two very distinct parts of dick's life that didn't necessarily reveal a bridge point. so it's not entirely unrealistic that dick may grow to be the person (at least to some extent) that bat canon portrayed him to be in the years that followed but i certainly think as it stands it felt unearned and like all of his issues explored in ntt were conveniently swept to the side without any semblance of closure (albeit i do think some of these issues are addressed in outsiders '03 but in that dickheaded way that winick explores things generally. so i'm not sure it's the kind of closure people actually want). it's very sad and ig that's what people cling to more than anything. it's not that they're opposed to him growing to be a better person but that they're opposed to a version of dick who feels like he sprung out of nothing

#ironically enough i Do think dick going back to gotham after the kory breakup made sense #like when something that big happens in your life what are you going to do. seek the advice of the one person you look up to more than anyt #ing right. but marv wolfman complicated things by writing bruce the way he did so rather than bruce playing an active part #in guiding dick through some of his issues and mistakes he instead became dick's burden to bear through extensive post knightfall trauma #and i mean you all know i Love knightfall. i really do it gives me brainworms upon brainworms #but i wish there had been just one moment. like after it was all over. that bruce and dick actually got to talk and like #discuss dick's problems yknow #i get the feeling they didn't delve much when writing prodigal bc they had to set up the next arcs and stuff but it's like #come on. come on. they could've afforded it. if dick really had to come back to gotham for a temporary stint where he tried to find himself #than a proper conversation with bruce about what he was going through should have been a part of that #bc i do think working with bruce's new cavalry of three teen heroes (tim / steph / cass) would have borne wonderful opportunities #for dick to grow as a leader and peer considering his ridiculous expectations of others and how this would measure up against teenagers #but the problem is that bat canon decided he was going to magically gel with everyone bc he was emotionally more well adjusted than bruce #was. like ok. ok. whateverrrrrrrr #like idk it's so funny they were given a dick with a plethora of issues and instead of using any of that ammo they were like nah #we're going to make our lives harder and give him new problems manifested out of thin air. totally makes sense. bullseye #outbox

[charlottedabookworm]

agreed to do the early shift instead of my usual late tomorrow so have some fic that my brain has decided to write now that it knows i have to get up at 4am:

"Then-" Joshua pauses, looking at him, before he smiles. It's too small, shaky and grief stricken. It's a shadow of his brother's smile.

It is the most beautiful thing he has seen in days.

Clive smiles back at him. Their father is dead, their home in ruins, their mother a traitor who wishes them both dead. They are on the run, barely surviving, and his chest aches so much it hurts to breathe and he- He smiles back at him, believing for the first time that they have a chance.

"It's not lying, Clive," his brother says and this is why the Phoenix chose him, this is why he's heir to the Duchy. Joshua inspires everyone he meets. "It's acting." His brother pauses and his smile widens, his eyes bright with innocent laughter. "You like acting."

He chokes on his own tongue.

Joshua giggles at him and his cheeks are burning but the Blessing of the Phoenix hums with warm joy between them. "Acting?" He grins, dropping into the most dramatic bow Uncle Byron had taught him, just to hear his brother laugh more. "I do like acting."

#...not what i intended to write when i was trying to figure out how to have a complete au #including secret identities #when clive is canonically an absolutely terrible liar #but hey clive was also a drama kid to the bone and he can totally devote himself to a role (esp when his brother's life depends on it) #my fic #ffxvi #fic idea #joshua rosfield #clive rosfield #snippet #should have expected this honestly clive's devotion to his brother is such a massive part of his character

[beeapocalypse]

trying to craft a funger oc like aughhhh i can see him i can picture him in my head right now [image of the most off putting little man possible]

#he does not have a name yet but he DOES have a vague concept. author from the eastern union who got drafted into the military and-- #--met another guy during the 1 week he had b4 getting shipped out to basic training. they immediately develop a WAY intense relationship-- #--and constantly send letters to each other. author is a total chickenshit and comes to cope w the violence of war thru-- #--alcoholism and a complete retreat into his obsession w the other man. gets a couple wires crossed and has his lust morph into more + more #--violent fantasies that the other man plays along w bc its Fun+Wild (at its core its the authors desire for CONTROL. if hes the one-- #--bringing the pain then hes safe. even better if its with the single person in existence he feels like he can trust during that-- #--period of time). manages to live throughout the rest of the war and rushes back to his lover. spends a slowly degrading week w him where- #--the man comes to realize what he thought of as simple metaphor+exaggeration was TRUE desire from the author + the author flounders-- #--without the then expected+familiar terror day in and day out. culminates in the man demanding the author leave and never try to contact-- #--him again (saying their romance was wild and exciting and unlike anything hed ever experienced but the only good way it couldve ended-- #--was if the author died out on the front and forever left him Wanting without the actual reality of those desires realized) and the-- #--author either tries to shoot himself or the man (fails to do so. lol) b4 running off to the first train out of town. worlds messiest guy #ya it leans a bit into samarie territory but hes fun. his theoretical ending b would probably have smth to do w sylvian worship + marriages #even more vague idea for his moonscorched form is a sopping wet pathetic red wolf ('red wolf' being one of the mans terms of endearment-- #--thru their wartime love letters) w its legs tangled up in barbed wire so it has to drag itself around. red bc its incredibly-- #--thin skin (<-- do you get it .) splits and bleeds thru with every movement. a lot of whining and incoherent babbling as it hesitates to-- #--ACTUALLY attack anybody. should have some cock horror element but ive no ideas on that front LOL #skill ideas are persistence predator (more melee damage dealt the less mind hes got- a backstory choice where he focuses entirely on the-- #--love letters rather than splitting focus on his on-pause career with short stories) and an unnamed one playing into his terror/lust deal- #--where he gets a buff to either melee damage or speed when his phobia is active. want to come up with at least one more though #mmmaybe him being an author doesnt play that well into his concept as a whole but hes my strangeguy so whatever

[eebie]

we are deconstructing gender on Google docs tonight boys

#this is stupid LMAO im annotating stuff from a guy from liek the 1400s who prolly didnt even give a shit #when he wrote that In the spirit realm the concept of gender is nebulous at BEST #if not just totally absent #he was like.. ya spirit beings change their genders all the time They switch tey can be combinations they can be nothing #reading that like Hemm…. well 1 big belief Thats held in christianity is that people are spirit beings underneath all the flesh #so what does that mean for the people who are dead set on Sex Organs determining peoples personalities ? idk. makes you think #gender means jack shit basically. #a lot of people raised male tend to behave in certain ways Not because of their sex but because of expectations And norms #and same with people raised female #and that shit goes alll the way back 2 the stone age #obligatory Nothing wrong w falling into gender stereotypes if its stuff u genuinely like!!^_^ #anyways i rambled #i would have rambled more if tumblr wasnt trying to kill itself as i was typing #my rambles #my little peewee brain is sometimes capable of coherent thought But calling this coherent migjt be a stretch #bc im hardly in any mind 2 decide if im making sense . its like a fuckin echo chamber up in my brain N every echo becomes more n more warpd #until it eventually sounds normal 2 me ^_^ but when i voice it. the. suddenly i realize Wow thats fucked! #which is why. i usually keep my mouth shut !!! #but thats also bad .real bad If ur opinions always go unchallenged you may as well not even have them #should alwayd know Why you think what u do

[nostalgia-tblr]

If I could do Fics With A Plot I'd probably attempt An AU Where Lauffey Dies And Odin Goes "Oh Hey, Frost Dudes, I Had Your Heir All Along :D He's Urs Now :D" Except Because This Is A Shit Plan It Does Not Go At All Well. Because it does bother me. Because I worry too much about fictional monarchies having the 'wrong' rules. D:

#this of course means odin has also has to tell his son “btw we lied to you. GUESS WHAT THO!! I GOT U A JOB!!” #and he sends Thor along because a) characters need other characters to talk to and b) he does in fact expect trouble #and I reckon after some sort of tense Confrontation about how if Lauffey wanted rid of his son he should have the guts to make sure he died #instead of leaving it to fate like a COWARD #Loki would - by power of poshness alone - manage to convince one or two Jotuns that he does indeed count as the heir #meanwhile: existential crisis D: D: D: #but hey free kingdom nothing to sneeze at eh? let's go! we can do this! #except (obviously) no. you can't. there is NO WAY there's nobody out there with a counterclaim. #and if your WORST ENEMY raised your new king (who has a questionable claim) you absolutely manage to find a third cousin from somewhere far #off who also has a shaky claim but - here's the thing - he's not an obvious attempt to impose Odin's puppet on your realm #and then Plot would unfold which is why i cant write this despite my Weird Niche Interests being aroused (NOT LIKE THAT) by this idea #also i would answer the “was there no mother involved? did she not mind the infanticide thing?” (could go either way on that really) #essentially Loki does have Scheming Politician energy but sometimes the task really is just impossible #but perhaps surprisingly the ending is a heartwarming reunion and maybe - MAYBE - some sort of vague apology #because that really was The Worst Fucking Plan Of All Time #okay someone stop me making a new file (you-and-whose-army.rtf) and writing the extensive notes i've now got in my head D: #(but an AU so not really!) #do you want a civil war on jotunheim because this is how you get a civil war on jotunheim #...oh no DO you want a civil war on jotunheim?! D: D: was THAT the plan??? D: D: #i'd totally throw in an Ambitious Consort Queen because those are my jam <3 <3 <3 #fic-related #thor movies

[froqgy]

dante being a cool badass guy who canonically loves strawberry sundaes and doesnt smoke cigarettes is like so awesome do you understand how awesome this is

#i dont want this to come off as i have something againstppl smoking just like thats what u might expect of him but hes totally not #its hard to picture its just his character #so its really funny when ppl draw him smoking. or vergil that is also rly funny like no where is said that #vergil canonically doesnt smoke but u should know he doesnt. of course he wouldnt #its just so out oft character for both of them

[jacksintention]

.

#I was contemplating whether to message or not someone who told me to do so in May to see each other again #and like... On the one hand I want to. I so desperately want to #On the other hand... what do I do afterwards? #I've crafted so much of my life around the fact of seeing him again #I was content with that instant in December. More than content. I didn't expect him to be so happy to see me at all #And he told me he was leaving but he'd come back in May‚ to write him then to see each other at lenght #But after so much absence and honestly so little intimacy since the very beginning‚ #and mainly having the chance of seeing him be what's kept me alive for a long while... it's like. What for? xD #We have nothing to say to each other and what do I do afterwards with my life? #So anyway I was contemplating this decision and #I really should learn better ways of coping with life. This is so stupid it's kinda humiliating #But he's meant so much to me. He means so much to me. I don't think he knows how much he's meant to me #But like. In a totally detached way xD He's one of my favourite people I've ever met. I enjoyed spending time with him #But it's not that. It's situational xD #I don't know. I just wanted to ramble a bit and this blog has fewer followers haha #I used to write these things down on notebooks but I'm afraid of someone reading them when I'm dead haha #Other than the instant in December I hadn't seen this man since 2015. It's been so long. I've missed him desperately but also I haven't #I can't believe his 'go into academia‚ that way we'll see each other again one day' worked #If someone is reading this‚ don't go into academia. It's depressing‚ it makes you resent what you love and it doesn't pay haha #It's stupid how many things I've ruined in my life for my detached attachment for this particular person #with whom I never really had a close relationship. Yet here I am. And in part‚ indeed‚ here I am #I was considering the most effective way to kill myself when he told me to go into academia to meet again at some random conference in 2015 #And I was going to kill myself this December until I saw him and he told me to meet him in May #And he was the only person to say the right words when I first tried to kill myself #I don't know what he does #But he always makes me want to live #The sky looks beautiful and violet when I watch it from beneath the jacaranda flowers and suddenly Tuesdays come back #I miss how his hands smelled of coffee in the mornings and how he blushed when you teased him. He had beautiful hands #I think I won't write to him. It seems unbearable. It seems unbearable to see him again and see everything that was and wasn't #and how much kinder my life could have been had I known how to manauver it. And it's unbearable losing the possibility of seeing him again

[ulforcev-dramon]

Now we just have to wait for the Primal video game to fix this bullshit like we did with Samurai Jack.

i actually had no idea they retconned the samjack ending with the game, so I just watched it and have pretty mixed feelings about it

don’t get me wrong, it’s nice the samjack end was fixed regarding Ashi! absolutely better than what we got at the end of s5

buuuuut wrt Primal specifically, I think I’d rather he just leave it alone, personally. he had the chance for a satisfying ending and he blew it. i don’t think a retcon can undo the special form of bizarre disappointment S2 Ep10 gave, there’s no element of surprise or shock left even for the story elements that could have been done well. i’ll be going into it with bitterness, basically, so a retcon will only have everything going against it from the getgo.

#idk might be an unpopular response but the game looks. Bad. so having the better end walled off behind it just feels like #somehow even worse/more bitter on some level #u know? #like primal’s ending was bungled bad enough—unless the game looks and plays monumentally better than samjack’s then i think i’d rather #he just Not #neologisms #(THAT SAID if the game looked felt and played well? hell yea! but if we are talking samjack game quality for a fixed ending I’m Out) #(i do feel like he’d have to also completely change the ending… make it something New (if even possible by now) in order to surprise again) #primal #primal spoilers #who knows tho maybe in 6 months or a year i’ll feel different #what i really wish had happened was ep 5 was nixed and all the current eps were brought forward by 1 #break the final ep into 2 parts: first part spear’s flashback and his integration into Mira’s home #part 2 great big episode-long fight that’s more climactic than the Mad Sauropod ep #i won’t say one way or another what spear’s fate should or shouldn’t be because i feel that alone wasn’t the damning part of ep10 #just… (gestures vaguely to the whole episode) everything else #actually what i had totally expected was at least 3 seasons ill be totally real with you #the fact i didnt expect a series finale also threw me off and compounded all the bizarre pacing issues and story choices #im just baffled that every single other fight in the series felt higher-stakes and more cinematic than the Series’ Final Fight.

[sandsofdteam-moved]

good morning it looks like there's still residual mcc discourse but also apparently punz lost like 80RR from when George ended last night 😭 Praying he stays in immortal for the rest of the act if he ends in ascendant I will be pissed on his behalf

#discourse #<- I'm just gonna do a lil vent about it in the tags don't open them if you don't want to see it :] hopefully it all tides over soon #i think the discourse is stupid tbh it's not a hill to die on for either side 😭 #like personally I both agree and disagree w drm and that's okay #I think they SHOULD have redone the event #bc a quarter of the contestants in a relatively small event is a significant amount and warranted some kind of action #and I'm aware that there was likely no way to manually change the scores but they should have just counted the best time across attempts #that way it's fair for both players who did disconnect and did great the second run and for those whose momentum got knocked the 2nd time #the way that they did it in competition was probably the best and only way to handle it which sucks :/ #however he was totally right in questioning why they waited for so many people to finish before deciding to reset #most likely it's bc they needed the round to finish so they could replay the game but why not say anything at all until after 30+ finishes? #anyways. I think that he had every right to complain and also much like last sg the vod watch ended up w a karmic resolution so why care #look a fair analysis of both that rationalizes the reason for both shocking #ppl on the anti-drm side are overreacting bc he had both valid criticism and the right to do so #like imagine your entire team morale being super high bc they did great and then someone says jk didn't count do it again #and then you have to keep up with the expectation of the first time only to underperform like that'd be stuck in my head for ages too #plus around his little rants he made sure to say that it was his frustration towards what had happened and that sending the #crew/event hate was fucking stupid and no one should do that bc it really is a wonderful event and they put their souls into running it #is there room for valid criticism of both parties? hell yeah but it doesn't seem like anyone is actually doing it 😭 #it's ppl with residual drm hate getting more ammo and making it into a bigger deal than it really needs to be #but we're also amplifying it like for the discourse to die ppl need to stop talking about it so this is my one little vent I'm done now #anyways. yesterday was epic like despite all of their setbacks and two of their best games sitting out yellow managed to pull it together #their epic skybattle rampage? george being cracked during meltdown? skeppy's only skb weakness being the border?? #there's so much more stuff that we could be positively focused on #also george's first win in nearly two years dream reclaiming most landed shots in db skephalo making out in the winners' circle or smth #also after a really sad first db loss for drm last canon db he was in he managed to do so fucking well this time and sweep AGAIN #like they can't contain him even w anti-sweep mechanisms in place LOL #scuffed tourney for sure but it had such fun moments too we should focus on those

[lesbiten]

the fandom image of hawkfrost being this sleek and stream lined flamboyant villain is entirely made up because in canon he was just a boring loser (and i say that so nicely he has his fun moments i guess) and thats not to say the fanon version of him is bad bc i actually like it but it makes sense that the official merch for him does not reflect headcanons

#no punctuation in this one i have a headache #i think warriors fans do this very funny thing where the wc fan version of this series is objectively better than canon like 80% of the #time #so every time something happens that contradicts fanon interpretations of characters people criticize it #and when its shit writing its totally fair because the erins should just let the super fans of this series write #but when it comes to figurines. cmon. did you think hawkfrost was going to slay. did you expect that #hes greasy in the books too lest you forget it. #simon says

[fastidious-and-a-mess]

just finished s6 of elementary (finished s5 on sunday. lol) and i’m trying to get my friends to watch it also so unfortunately i can’t drown them in my spoilery rantings so instead everything is going in the tags here so uh. abandon all hope ye who enter these tags, spoilers abound

#im gonna pad these tags a bit actually #so the spoilers go behind a 'read more' or whatever #youre welcome <3 #have i mentioned you should watch this show #anyways we're probably safe now su #HOOOOOOOOOLY SHIIIIIIT #that is not at ALL where i expected that to go #gregson was really warming up to me this season. he had never really stood out as a characted before but i think he really shown in s5&6 #but man. that finale. honestly idk if i can forgive his character for that. i know he was just trying to protect his daughter but she had to #take responsibility for killing michael because it was not fair for joan to take the fall for that even unintentionally. im definitely gonna #miss him tho. and marcus too. i mean i knew his presence was coming to an end anyways with the marshalls but this finale has really dissolve #d the core cast here. now its jsut sherlock and joan. back in london too; thats quite the move #and in the last season. i guess the total shift is setting and cast didnt do well with ratings? or maybe it was always going to end at 221b #idk. but i think my favorite part of this season was sherlock completely devoting himself to the idea of joan getting a kid #personally idk how i feel about the narrative making her a mother in the end. i could say it has come problematic implications about women's #roles but honestly within the context on the narrative? i dont think thats entirely true. anyways i jsut thought it was super cure how much #sherlock just wanted joan to be happy and fulfilled. 'i would make adjustments for you watson always.' 'we're two people who love each other #they way he develops through her. the way he learns how to love and be loved. the way he becomes kinder and he lets down his walls to laugh #with her and smile with her. the way that they understand each other in ways nobody else ever has. it makes me som emotinal #HE NAMED A BEE AFTER HER #im never going to get over that #anyways 'uncle detective' is maybe the cutest thing ever. he cleaned up his murder dollhouse for a kid she didnt even have yet :) #ok i think im done. for now. its 1am and i have class at 8:30 so uh i guess i'll just die about it but oh well. i was gonna watch one more #and then i realized the one after that one was the season finale so you see how i did what i had to #anyways. good night #:') #will tags this far in even get registered? oh well #elementary #cbs elementary #please someone talk to me about them

[arthur-r]

i got complimented for the stickers on my water bottle being so cottagecore…. killing and biting and crying and screaming

#also going around under my deadname all day has been definitely a weird and not good experience #like i haven’t had to introduce myself under my deadname since before i even knew i was trans #(even when i have to pretend to be cis i always go with ari because i can treat it like a silly nickname and be kinda okay with it) #i never just spend my time with my mom constantly at my shoulder and it’s been weird #also the bus driver was being majorly creepy toward my mom #like. as we were boarding the first time he was like oh you you’re special your red hair makes you special #and then he called her like. ‘‘my special redhead lady’’ #and it was just. very uncomfortable. like i don’t usually run into people being that weird about gingers but this guy was #anyway lincoln is nice but it’s a lot like st paul so my mom thinks i should stay in state and go a little further into the cities #it does kind of feel like i should either go somewhere new and different (madison) or save the cost of room and board when this is basically #just another midwestern city only 6 hours further away #but the thing is i WANT to be far from home it’s just. everything feels very fragile and hard to figure out #i have to pull up tuition figures for all the schools again it’s getting really hard to remember what i’m getting into with each one #anyway idk. like. i like it here but. my dad wasn’t wrong when he said nearly everyone is white here it’s friggin weird #like there’s a couple other poc touring but i’m talking like. three total out of 60. so idk how it would feel to relocate here #anyway i’ve got a lot to think about but i haven’t even officially toured campus yet. i’m sticking with it #and there’s the international quilt museum and stuff here that are really cool #so yeah i’ll keep giving it a chance. it’s just. idk it’s not quite what i was expecting #that being said i would happily be a student here. i’m just not sure it’s worth whatever tuition costs to be here #anyway i’ll shut up about college stuff it’s just where i’m physically at right now so it’s what’s on my mind #but yeah. idk. i still have time to figure all of this out. and i will. just. yeah #me. my post. mine. #delete later #college talk

[theheadlessgroom]

https://beatingheart-bride.tumblr.com/post/684303850275995648/beatingheart-bride-theheadlessgroom

@beatingheart-bride

Still seeing that she was worried, Randall desperately wanted to reach out and take her hands in his, to hold them, give them a comforting squeeze, to warm them as he soothed her worried mind and nervous thoughts...

…but he remembered how uncomfortably cold and clammy his hands were, how bony and spidery they were, and how they would do no good when it came to comforting Emily, and so he kept them to himself, instead leaning forward to speak, once again donning the soothing, certain voice of an angelic teacher:

“Please, do not fret about opening night, Emily,” he insisted gently, keeping his tone even and encouraging. “Your casting will not be a fluke in the eyes of the public, I am certain of it. Whatever doubts they may have will vanish as soon as you are on-stage as Elissa, and they will absolutely adore you, and for good reason. You are not only a marvelous singer, but an exceptional dancer and a talented actress, and they will see that. As soon as you take your place on that stage, La Constance will be the furthest thing from their minds.”

Did he believe some of the audience would be disgruntled to know their diva would not be performing that evening? Sure. Did he believe they would completely forget all about said diva upon seeing Emily? Absolutely. He had every confidence in her and her ability to sweep the audience off their feet, and any uncertainties they may have about this mysterious newcomer would be washed away in a heartbeat.

#((someone once captioned a piece of art they did of erik and the daroga with 'how high do u think the daroga's blood pressure is')) #((and i have NEVER forgotten that caption because by god-the only thing hopping jolly high really IS that poor man's blood pressure!)) #((it must be through the roof on any given day!)) #((and i'm sure it just absolutely SPIKES whenever he hears ANYTHING that could've remotely been erik's fault)) #((and i can't even IMAGINE how said pressure felt when listening to erik be such a brat about the chandelier and the siren!)) #((and seriously; the siren straddles the line between absurdity and horror BEAUTIFULLY)) #((like on the one hand it's such a silly excuse: yes erik; the daroga is completely stupid and will believe you when you say)) #((that a siren killed philippe; he'll TOTALLY buy that)) #((but at the same time...the image of erik creeping up on philippe in the dark murky waters of the underground lake)) #((thinking he was raoul; pulling him down when he least expects it to drown him; it's such a horrifying mental image)) #((and one that should absolutely be brought back in an adaptation!)) #outofhatboxes #beatingheart-bride #V:Phantasm of the Mansion