#fucking burnley

[ginerva-mollyweasley]

i’ve decided to just think about this q&a instead of the score

#ffs #how do we beat chelsea #but are 1 nil to burnley #fucking burnley #burnley #nottm forest #cricket #stuart broad #jimmy anderson #broaderson

[hairtusk]

misty autumnal train ride through yorkshire... my boyfriend waiting on the other side... a walk around the castle and tea and films and naps... i feel normal for the first time in weeks :') <3

#not to doxx the everloving fuck out of myself #but the section of rail between hebden and burnley is the most beautiful in the country. i really do believe that. #Spotify

[thatbrightblueshine]

genuinely miss seeing his pretty face. another 4 days. 🕊️

#rambles #james trafford #burnley fc #cannot believe this lot didn't play for 19 fucking days

[jacobglaser]

Ted Lasso really captures how fucking insufferable Man City fans are with Jamie's dad.

#im watching city batter Burnley 3-0 on my second monitor so its personal lmao #i dont even like football what is happening to me #its only cos its burnleys first match of the season. plus its fun spotting my mum in the crowd telling the ref to fuck off #anyway i love this show so much #and fuck city #ted lasso

[bo0zey]

christmas must’ve come early y’all cuz in approximately 5 hrs i will be listening live in person <20feet away to benjamin burnley’s acoustic sighs whines groans n moans………………………..and i guarantee u all by the end of the day i will be with child through the miraculous conceivement that is immaculate conception

#ik conceivement isn’t a word but idc i’m going to be the next mother mary #im gonna get sooooo pregnant yall #my stepmom fr tryna make me not kms the way she scored these fucking breaking benjamin live acoustic tickets like wtf #little does she know i’m just gonna b able to die happier n happier 😈😈😈😈😈😈 #benjamin burnley #breaking benjamin #shut up cianna

[harryswinks]

really wish i’d gone to watch the girlies at the lane today but the fucking hassle it would have been with there being no trains still i just couldnt put myself through it more than already have to

#at least for thursday theres trains from here #rather than us having to get all the way to cockfostsers early sunday for the fucking burnley game #stacey speaks

[kyogos]

conceding a pen is karma for letting the fidget spinner score

#i hate it hereeeeeeee #fuck off and die burnley #football lb

[ginerva-mollyweasley]

the only good thing to come out of yesterday’s football was stu’s commentary

#how the fuck did we lose to burnley #nottm forest #burnley #stuart broad #i’m glad i missed most of it for the cricket

[kuteon]

you never want to hear that burnley is ahead of blackburn in the championship and yet

#football #burnley fucking sucks #sim.txt

[kvetchinglyneurotic]

They're up at Burnley and it's snowing; lightly at first, a dusting of white over grass through the second half that had them shivering in their kits as they slid mud-spattered across the pitch. They'd won thanks to the fucking Roy Kent effect, everyone except Jamie 'cause that'd require coach to actually, well, coach him. To look at a space with Jamie in it and act like he saw a person instead of nothing at all, and he used to wish he was invisible, back when he was a kid dodging fists and snarled words but now he wants to cry, just a bit, 'cause he really is trying and why can't Roy try too?

They're up at Burnley and it's snowing in huge fluffy white flakes as they board the coach and Jamie feels sick, sits in the aisle beside Sam who presses against the window, breath fogging on the glass.

"You know I'd love to give you all a day out in town to celebrate but it looks like it's gonna be a snow day for us, folks," Ted says, stood at the front of the bus with a broad smile under his moustache. They all groan and he chuckles, hands held out in front of him. "Hey, I don't make the weather — and boy, that would be something, wouldn't it? Give y'all a taste of Kansas summer instead of all this rain you've got going on. Or snow, at the moment. Anyhow, we'll make our own fun, won't we boys?"

"It's barely even snowing," Zoreaux grumbles.

Jamie hurries off the coach, ready to crawl under the blankets and draw the curtains where he can't see any of it and he's halfway to the hotel entrance when he realizes Sam isn't with him. Turns and finds him with his face turned up in the middle of the carpark with snow dusted on his hair and his jacket and melting on his skin.

"It's very beautiful," he says softly. Jamie trudges back towards him and there's a look on his face he's never seen before, all wondering and open and in that moment with icy water trickling through his hair and his fingers frozen stiff in his pockets, Jamie thinks everything in his life has been worth it for this moment, watching Sam's face as he watches the snow.

Beside them, Dani kneels to scoop up a handful and yelps, shaking out his hands, pouting with betrayal. "And very cold!"

"You gotta wear gloves, mate," Jamie says. He knocks his shoulder against Dani and Dani knocks back.

"But it looks so soft!"

Inside, Ted leads them to the conference centre instead of up to their rooms and they sit in a circle on the floor, coaches and all. Jamie ends up huddled between Sam and Dani, arms looped over each other's shoulders, two lads who've never seen snow before in their lives and Jamie who has but the cold worms into him more than it does the others, never mind how Isaac teases him that he should be tougher, northern lad that he is.

There are eyes on him, a tiger watching from the brush. Jamie glances up and it's Roy, eyes dark and hard and searching and it's the first time they've met eyes since he returned, maybe ever. Jamie breaks first. Stares down at the carpet instead — ugly fucking thing, pilly and brown and worn out. They're a Championship League team now; can't afford the good hotels any longer. A year ago he'd've thrown a fit, quit in a huff to somewhere that deserved him like he might have done when Ted became gaffer if he hadn't had City to go back to. Only it turned out Richmond had made him too soft to handle Manchester and all that came with it. He'd made it twelve years with dad hanging over his head and then broke after barely a handful of months, huddled in his bathroom with blood in his teeth, told his agent he'd take whatever as long as it was far away.

The door crashes open and it's Zoreaux, back from raiding the hotel bar 'cause Ted wouldn't let him out no matter how much he insisted it weren't a proper snowstorm and the bartender let him buy by the bottle now half the guests who were supposed to come up had cancelled. Pass it around like they had at the curse fire and Jamie still feels stupid for that, a little, spilling his guts everywhere only to be sent back, but part of him wants to try again, just to test.

He hasn't drunk much since he got back, not much appeal in it after dad's drunken rages and the constant refills of neon-coloured cocktails on Lust Conquers All, but he drinks now, both hands wrapped around the bottle of vodka — not vanilla, the regular kind — when it comes his turn, warmer and warmer from the heat of their palms with each round. Sam's slung half over his shoulders and every few seconds he giggles at nothing and Dani says, "what is it, amigo?" and Sam says, "I don't know!" and it just makes him laugh harder. Jamie shoves playfully at his chest — "Right in my ear, mate? Really?" — and they both overbalance so the window stretches above them, one of those long thin floor-to-ceiling things. Looks up at the snow spiralling through the flat white of the sky and like this he can almost feel the cold bite of it on his face, the melting weight of it on his clothes as the water trickles down over his skin.

"I got lost in a snowstorm, once," he says, dreamily. Someone else is talking but they go silent at his voice and that's got to be on the list of prick shit he's not supposed to do, probably, to keep Ted from booting him off the team again, but he can't shove the words back inside now.

"Oh yeah?" Ted asks. "I didn't know y'all got those over here. Sounds like one heck of an experience, Jamie."

He shrugs against the carpet. "Not really. I was s'posed to drive for my da, right, 'cause his usual guy was being a fucking little bitch about it and didn't want to drive in the snow—" that's how dad had put it on the phone when Jamie got called into the principal's office, said his da was on the phone with a family emergency— "and I'd never even been to the fucking neighbourhood, right, so by the time I went and got the car off his mate and his mate gave me this whole fucking stupid lecture about not crashing or getting caught and shit and found the place it was a proper white-out, and my dad had been hanging around so long with this like, massive fucking TV that someone'd called the cops so I just fucking drove off, right? 'Cept I'd never driven in snow before so we got stuck in a ditch and me da sent me out to..." he blinked, bleary with drink. "Dunno. To find someone to tow us or some shit. But I didn't know where the fuck I was and I couldn't see shit so I just walked around 'til I found the road again, and by then dad had got himself unstuck and left, and the buses weren't running so I had to walk home." It's not really a bad story but his heart's pounding all the same and the room's gone quiet. He scratches harder at the carpet; tries to laugh but it comes out strangled and faint. "Good exercise at least, yeah?"

No one says anything, still. The carpet comes up in tufts; he piles them together like he used to do as a kid picking at grass during a fire drill. It's his turn with the vodka again, handed over by a solemn-faced Dani, and he takes a long pull. The alcohol calms the frantic buzz beneath his skin, leaves him tired and heavy and warm, the silence comforting instead of worrying.

After a while, Ted clears his throat. There's a funny tilt to his smile. "Hey, I love me a silver lining. Thanks for sharing that, Jamie," he says, strained. Maybe the cold's got him sick, or maybe it's just the way the floor's spinning that's making him look funny. Jamie flops onto his back.

"Uh-huh. Sure thing, coach."

"It is very stupid to volunteer your criminal history like that," Jan Maas says.

"'S not a crime to drive the getaway car," Jamie says.

"Pretty sure it is, bruv," Isaac says.

"Huh."

"Don't worry, Jamie Tartt! We will not tell anyone!" Dani says, very loudly or else very close to his ear. There's a general murmur of agreement.

"Thanks, amigo. I won't tell anyone 'bout your crimes, neither," Jamie says. "Not that I'm saying you've done crimes and that. But if you have. Unless it's like, murder, maybe. But if you murdered someone they probably deserve it so also not then." He holds up his fist; Dani bumps it on the second try.

"You cannot break a pact made during a snowstorm," Sam says wisely.

"I still can't believe you guys think this is a real snowstorm," Zoreaux says, and Jamie drifts off to a vivid description of the horrors of Montreal in winter.

He blinks awake to find the lads shuffling back to their rooms and Roy crouched over him with his giant fucking caterpillar eyebrows scrunched. The position can't be any good on his knee but Jamie's trying not to get in fights with the coaches so much this season so he doesn't say anything. Roy doesn't, either. He blows out a sigh like one of those panthers Jamie'd seen at the zoo with mummy way back when he was a kid, mouth working like he's trying to force himself to speak.

"Your dad's a piece of shit," he says. "You don't have to find a silver lining." And then he hauls Jamie to his feet and fucking dusts off the carpet lint with the sleeve of his jacket like Jamie's his seven-year-old niece. "You played fine today. Next time you can be fucking great, but first you need to get the fuck out of your head and be more aggressive."

Jamie breaks into a grin. "Aye aye, coach."

#behold the fruits of my poor time management skills #“it's not a crime to drive the getaway car” comes from my mom's cousin who got arrested for... driving the getaway car #jamie tartt #sam obisanya #dani rojas #ted lasso fanfic #kvetch oc

[northern-punk-lad]

Solidarity to Burnley councillors who resigned fuck genocidal starmer

#uk politics #england politics #Lancashire

[kelloggsenthusiast]

heyyy could you do alejandro garnacho x reader where reader witnesses his bicycle kick goal at the man u v everton match and she’s just so happy for him, maybe if he dedicates his celebration to her too🥹thank youuu

Shoo, I didn't think I'd get a request for him this quickly :))

At your best, you are love

It had been a stressful season so far for the boys, as every match weekend dampened morale more and more. As a team physio, you bore witness to this firsthand. It was more personal when you saw your boyfriend, Alejandro, struggling with it.

He had been at the club for about a year and felt that he wasn't doing anything. You had tried to talk to him, tell him it was still too early to judge his performance but he barely listened. Much as you loved his dedication to his job, it's hold over him frustrated you.

That weekend, the team made its way to the mereyside for the match against Everton. Historically, you should've been optimistic about the forthcoming match but it was like you were dreading it.

The match started off well, with both sides having enough chances to score, but frankly, it could've give either way.

That's when it happened,however. You turned away to speak to your supervisor about something when the entire stadium erupted into cheers. Your confusion gave way to joy when you realised that it was a goal for United.

One that was scored by none other than Alejandro Garnacho.

You immediately stood and cheered with everyone else as tears filled your eyes.but when you caught his eye, he smiled at you as kissed the tattoo of your name on his arm, dedicating the goal to you.

The rest of the match went on with everyone feeling a lot more hopeful for a win. And two goals later, you were returning to Manchester with three more points under your belt.

On the bus ride back, half of they team was either asleep or too drunk to be aware of anything beyond their arms reach. This gave you an opportunity to be with your boyfriend without anyone noticing.

"how do you feel?" You ask, wanting to know what's on his mind.

"more confident than I did four hours ago, that's for sure," he replies as he runs his and through your hair and kisses your forehead. You lean further into him.

"you are a good player, alejandro. I don't know why you doubt yourself," you say, seriously. "Today just proves that. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you."

He smiles at your words, grateful for them and for you.

"gracias, mi amor. I don't know what I'd do without you. I love you," he whispers as he holds you closer.

You smile to yourself as you lean against his chest, eyes droopy with sleep.

I think we are in particular need of this one after what the fuck was that Burnley game???? It's like when you remind United of how much progress we make, they just want to take it back to zero. Anyway, I'm stuck with this until tennis starts again. Apologies for not writing sooner and for writing shit. I'm going through it.

- sadie

For @pepsfootstool-69 who is just as unhinged as I. And for you, dear reader

#alejandro garnacho x reader #alejandro garnacho #alejandro garnacho fluff #Alejandro Garnacho fanfic #alejandro garnacho fanfiction

[jamietarttsnorthernattitude]

For this week’s word-

Wales. Welsh. Dad. Mean. Bad.

Thank you thank you my friend. I’m guessing you’re looking for something in the Colin’s Bad Dad category but surprisingly, I only had Wales once! And not in said fic, sorry. Instead please enjoy this snippet from not to me, not if it’s you:

The problem was that half the Greyhounds were scattered across the globe, taking advantage of the remainder of their International Break. Colin, Dani and Zoreaux had gone to Wales, Mexico and Canada, respectfully, after they losing in the group stage of the World Cup. Bumbercatch had followed to Switzerland after their loss the week before. At least Roy assumed he was in Switzerland. With Bumbercatch, you were never quite sure, and Roy knew better than to ask.

I did find Welsh(man) in the story though!

Maybe he should apologise for his play in the match, too, which had no doubt suffered from the guilt the Welshman felt as soon as the words left his lips on the bus. The guilt that had wrapped around Colin’s spine since then, growing like a tumour. Just as Colin decides to change seats and apologise to his teammate, Dani deposits himself in the empty seat next to Jamie.

LOTS of Dads, but I offer you a snippet you basically wrote from all you can take with you is that which you’ve given away aka Roy Kent’s A Wonderful Life from after Roy spots Jamie for the first time:

“There he is over there,” Clarence says, pointing.

And Roy’s immediate thought is denial. There’s no fucking way that’s Jamie Tartt. The man looks a decade older than his 26 years. He’s moving stiffly, more like Roy did in the twilight of his career than the spry footballer Roy watched perform a joyful roundoff in Amsterdam less than a year before. There are bags under his eyes, and to Roy’s great concern, Jamie’s hair looks lacklustre, drab, and unconditioned. It’s not even styled. Even from a distance, Roy can see those same grey eyes that practically twinkled in Roy’s presence are dull and unfocused. All of his sunshine, all of his inherent Jamie-ness, is gone, snuffed out by some invisible force.

“That can’t be him,” Roy whispers in disbelief. “God the kid looks so sad.”

“Ah, but it is. In a world where you never existed, Jamie Tartt has no constant presence of Roy Kent on his wall to guide him, to inspire him, to give him hope. Without Roy Kent as Captain, Jamie declined a transfer to Richmond and instead ended up at Burnley FC.”

Only a short car ride from Manchester, Roy realises with dread. Only a short ride from his Dad. Maybe it wasn’t such an invisible force that stole Jamie’s light after all.

Back to Colin for mean:

Jamie resembled a kicked puppy after Colin’s comment. Calling someone a dog was a term that Colin thought received a bad rap unfairly. Dogs were loyal, friendly and fucking adorable. Jamie might not be the fittest on the team, in Colin’s opinion, but the grown-out walnut mist and the smile Jamie wears more often than not lately, certainly qualify under the adorable category. And the only time Jamie’s not friendly recently is if he’s given the prick signal. Okay, he could still be a prick, but it was no longer in a mean-spirted way, more in a funny, sarcastic way.

And bad:

“It’s not like he’s ever laid a hand on me. I’ve never been afraid of him. Sometimes, I’d just rather not talk to him. Like now.”

“Colin, how does the stuff he says make you feel? I know you say it’s not a big deal. But does it make you feel good when he acts like that to you?”

“Well, no,” Colin says, and Jamie stares at him expectantly. “I guess if it makes me feel bad, but Dads can just be tough on their kids.”

“You think Ted’s like that to his son?” Jamie raises an eyebrow. “Come on, you saw Ola with Sam, practically thinks sunshine comes out Sam’s arse.”

“Sometimes I think sunshine comes out of Sam’s arse,” Colin counters.

#jamie tartt #ted lasso fanfic #roy kent #colin hughes #fic: all you can take with you is that which you’ve given away #fic: apologies from my tongue and never yours #fic: not to me not if it’s you #wip #wip wednesday #wip word game #thank you friend for offering me so many bits to share

[harryswinks]

wait i just realised connor robs got relegated

#FUCK burnley #he’s gonna have to play against swansea next year….. he’ll score own goals i know it #like when shelvey always used to score them against liverpool #stacey speaks