Enlightening conversation I just had with my mom:
Mom: "I don't understand the whole House and Wilson thing. I mean, Lord help me, I watched that entire show and I never thought they were more than just really good friends!"
Me: "Okay but what about the whole episode where they pretended to be gay to mess with a neighbor and Wilson actually proposed to House, or the b plot where House is trying to get Wilson to furnish their apartment without letting a woman to tell him what to do and Wilson is like 'but you're telling me what to do' and House is like 'and?' or what about that time House told a woman he was thinking about Wilson while having sex with her?"
Mom, nodding: "No it's just that there's no tv shows anymore where two male leads can just be really good friends. House and Wilson's friendship is so deep it transcends into brotherhood." (dear readers please keep in mind she's also said this in the past about Dean and Castiel and Steve and Bucky)
Me: "Do you think my friendship with [best friend of multiple years who I regularly flirt with and have kissed a couple times and am constantly in a 'will they won't they' battle with and we were both a big reason the other came out as queer, all of which my mom knows] is so deep it transcends into brotherhood?"
Mom: "...Yes."
Me:
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Astarion Baldurs Gate 3 Isn't A TumblrSexyMan™, He's Just A SexyMan™
I've seen a large number of people, most of whom are in the Astarion Disliker/"I don't get it" camp most who are not on this particular hell site, cite Astarion as Tumblr's latest sexyman. Today, I will be explaining why I do not believe that to be the case. That instead, as the title states, he's just a sexyman.
No real knowledge of the hell site is required, I'll explain things for the new people.
Setting The Definitions
First, definitions because this is now Intro to Writing and Rhetoric. A sexyman would be anyone, usually masc or a man, who is concidered sexy by a wide range of people. Fascinating.
A Tumblr Sexyman, on the other hand, is a thing - usually fictional entity - that is incredibly popular on Tumblr.com to the degree it escapes it's fandom sometimes, in the most extreme of cases, becoming far more popular than it's original fandom. It is characterized by a few major characteristics. Ranging from Twinkism* (be it the character or fan interpretation), generally unconventionally/perceived to be unconventionally attractive in a non physical sense (character traits that wouldn't otherwise be desirable, like absurd behavior or generally evilness), to impeccable drip (either in the original media/design, or done by fans in fanart).
*note: Twinkism (which I did just throw in on the spot this is entirely bullshit for my own amusement) is the phenomenon of skinny, young looking, pretty/feminine white boys who are within media. This is different from twinks, who are understood to be young and skinny - being pretty, popular, or white is not connected. All those who participate in Twinkism are Twinks, but not all Twinks participate in Twinkism.
Does Astarion Baldurs Gate 3 Fit The Definition?
First rule: must be at least a twink. Is he?
No. Yes. Kinda. In a way. Many people would describe Astarion as someone who's gone through "Twink Death". No this is not because he's literally undead. Twink Death, in it's simplest form, is when a twink no longer looks young and/or feminine. Astarion has aged. His crows feet and laugh lines, while beautiful, do not make him look 18. For some this would disqualify him from being a Twink. So perhaps he has failed at the first step.
I, however, am not satisfied with that. Moving on, is Astarion - or would Astarion - actually be considered conventionally unattractive in any way that is disconnected from his appearance? I argue no. Vampires are considered very well, normal to lust after. They're right below succubus on the "This isn't considered weird to find attractive" scale. You aren't romancing The Emperor here. Outside of that he's well groomed, shown to be muscular in game (headcanon does often disagree and while I wish it was true we are working with facts for this specific discussion), and an elf. In personality, while not for everyone, he's the pretty standard fruity sarcastic gay who's a bit selfish. We all know a fruity sarcastic gay who's a bit selfish, and they get laid. So it can't be considered that bad. Probably.
I feel important to note here that I am aroace and have no idea what I'm talking about right now. This is an educated guess.
Astarion has lost now, two for two. He's barely a twink, even going off of his model he's more a twunk. He definitely doesn't fit the Twinkism phenomenon. He's not weird to find attractive, I assume, so what else is there? His drip? I'm sorry, but his base outfit is a bit well Goofy to say the least. Much fanart leaves him in this outfit or a simpler version because drawing ruffles is enough to make anyone want to willingly jump headfirst into the underdark, so he fails the drip test as well.
His final hurtle: is his popularity Tumblr™. In this context Tumblr™ is different from Tumblr. Tumblr™ is the fandom side, where a sexyman would flourish and find their own fandom. Importantly, this fandom needs to be very insular to the site. It's a *Tumblr* sexyman after all. So that begs the question, is Astarion highly liked by mostly or purely Tumblr people/those who have the vibes of a Tumblr user? No.
Astarion is well loved by many people of various vibes. He has affected (previously) straight men on Reddit. Few can escape him and his 10 charisma.
Conclusion
Astarion is just a sexyman. He's just a fictional character that many think is neat and attractive for a variety of reasons. He's the Ryan Reynolds of crpgs. He's some dude, who's generally considered attractive by a lot of people who you both would and wouldn't expect to find him attractive.
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a friendly reminder that life is too short to just hit the like button and live with a blank blog. curate your tumblr, reblog your favorites, add your comments, save the links you want to revisit, and just create your own space–
I've had people chat me asking how interactions work on tumblr, a lot of us start out a little anxious about what's right to do or not on an online space, but you're always free to do what you want with your blog and account.
my first works didn't even have the right tags, I didn't make a masterlist until the later months, I didn't even reply to the first comments I received because I was worried that it wasn't the norm to reply. I had to use youtube to decorate my blog and I still have no idea how to design it like a proper website but that's alright because it's my space, and im not shy anymore about people seeing this space I curated because I find that a lot of you guys also enjoy the things I enjoy.
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miss molly!!! my love, my life!
i haven’t been online in a bit and in an attempt to catch up was speed scrolling and skimmed “won’t write fan fiction anymore” and came to a screeching halt
i thought i was seeing a goodbye or deleting my account type post and my heart was immediately in my ass. after some profile stalking i gathered some context and i need to say that you do whatever you need to do for yourself, and absolutely no one else.
that being said, anyone that has read anything you’ve written knows you CLEARLY don’t support or agree with the person who just named YOUR characters. bc while she may have written them down first, every story you create you build them new from scratch for us to fall in love with all over again, and none of that love comes from what she did but from what we as a community have built in spite of her.
I will support and love whatever you decide to do from here. your wolfstar is without a doubt my favorite and your fics are so special to me, but if this is what you need to do for you i back you 1000% and will be first in line to read anything you publish next.
just wanted you to know that youve brought immense joy to my life so far and i will forever be grateful you share your art with the world<3
xoxo, ur biggest fan
FRIEND 😭😭😭😭😭😭
I sincerely got weepy reading this, you have no idea how much this means to me! It makes me sad that she effectively ruined our fandom by being such a hateful person, but if I'm being honest, I'm also sort of excited about having something that is MINE and not attached to her in any way (kinda fun to figure out new names lol)
That being said, I'm not sure what I will do with what I produce. I like the IDEA of trying to actually get something original published in print, but I don't really know how to go about doing that. I considered it with DYH, but it was easier (and less scary) to write it as Wolfstar for ao3.
I haven't looked into posting original fiction on AO3, it is evidently a thing, but would anyone even read it?? (except some of my friends, including you, my darling anon)
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