#i find it funny that i made paul a basketball fan

[spellbook-gayboy]

Ooh action 28 paired with dialogue 13

okie dokie!

28 + 13.

“Yeah, yeah, in a minute, love,” Ian said, not even looking back as he sat hunched over, scribbling ink onto the old yellowing pages of the spell book. “Just gotta make sure this is right before I put it away...!”

“Ian...” Paul called. 

“Yeah, I know, just lemme-!”

“Ian.”

Ian stopped at the word. He slowly turned his head to look behind the collar of his cloak, spying the less than pleased look on his boyfriend’s face. “Ah... you planned something, didn’t you?”

“That I did.” Paul confirmed, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow as he tapped his foot on the floor. “So, d’you wanna stay in here and keep scribbling who-knows-what in that book while you reek like a dead cat,” He asked, “Or do you wanna shower for probably the first time this week, and join me on the couch in clothes that are actually clean?”

Ian blinked. His gaze flitted between his partner and the book. “Well... now that I think about it, the book can wait a day or two?”

“If you think so, honey.”

---

Ian scratched his neck, pulling at the hem of his beaten green tee. The Séance Dog logo had largely faded off the front of it from being washed so many times, only a few flecks of paint left. His lounge pants were partially eaten by moths, littered with holes around the waist and ankles that often joined together to expose the clothes’ insides or, more commonly, his bare legs. Most of these clothes had been around for at least three or four years, fished out of a clothing bin in Singapore or stolen from someone’s washing lines.  

“You ready, Ian?” He heard from downstairs. He checked his hair (not quite as messy as it usually was) before trudging down the polished spruce steps, his slippers making muffled padding noises. 

Paul was currently draped across one half of the red leather couch, sitting in a pair of grey sweatpants and his old Sacramento Kings jersey. His fingers drummed on the top of the TV remote as he eyed his boyfriend’s entry into the room. “Have I ever told you how well you clean up?”

Ian scoffed. “Alright, I get it! I’ll try and shower more!” He replied, rubbing at his eyes as he sat down. “Spirits, how long have I been up?!”

“About three... no, four days straight.” Paul told him. He shifted, now draping himself over the wizard. “You might be the only magic-user who does what you do, but that doesn’t mean you have to work yourself to death trying to fix every problem that comes your way! You’re only human, Ian.”

“Well, half human.”

Paul’s frown made Ian realise that his joke could’ve had better timing. 

“...I know what you mean, love. It’s just that I... I’m still new at this, y’know? I’ve gotta show everyone that I can pull my weight!” Ian confessed, blinking through bloodshot eyes at the ceiling as his head lolled back. “This whole ‘mystic defender of Earth’ schtick is the first thing I’ve had that could actually be long-term for me. I wanna be, well, worthy of it!”

“Worthy?” Paul asked, surprised by his choice of words. “Ian, you’re already worthy of it about a hundred times over! Hell, you’ve been at this less than a year and you’ve already saved the world about half a dozen times at the very least! And if that doesn’t convince you, then...,” He got closer, his mouth close to Ian’s ear, “then know that you’re worthy to me!”

Ian paused. Then, a smile worked its way across his face. “Are you still wearing that old thing? Not complaining though, ‘specially with the view I get when you do!”

Paul looked confused for a moment, before he realised what the wizard was talking about. His basketball jersey had always been about three sizes too large for his torso, showing off his lean yet somewhat muscled body and arms. “Okay, you raging horndog, simmer down!” He ordered, lightly batting his boyfriend’s arm. “Besides, how am I gonna throw this away? An authentic Kings jersey signed by my first male crush, Darren Collinson? What are you, crazy?”

“Pfft, Darren Collinson, what’s so special about him?” Ian grumbled. “So what, he plays for the NBA? I could play for the NBA if I wanted!”

“I’m sure you could, Ian! Now quiet, I’m putting a movie on!”

#i find it funny that i made paul a basketball fan #cause that man is no taller than like five foot six #invincible #invincible show #invincible amazon #invincible oc #🔮🪄 #ian cantation #👥🐼 #paul cha #multi paul #🔮🐼 #multimagic #my asks #summerfrwrks #writing prompt friday

[jrueships]

Alternative jimmy butler ships go

ALTERNATIVE JIMMY SHIPS G O ‼️‼️

Alt jimmy ships that are NOT kyle lowry #1 (in NO particular order) Paul George

i feel like most of my ships for jimmy is gonna be asshole4asshole or the unlucky twink he's become infatuated with... but this one is like a combo so it's the most powerful one <3 THE SCREENSHOT IS FAKE BY THE WAY

but anyways!! they're both big broncos fans and the Olympics coach had to throw away the football just to make them stop playing. Paul's bigass sunglasses that don't fit his face.. Jimmy's jersey. They can dork with each other about The Epic Highs and Lows of NFL football (National Football League.... Football). They're both super stubborn but are willing to talk things over AS LONG AS the other party has the courage to ACTUALLY talk things over and Try. Which they both have because they both think they're the modern einsteins of the nba. PG also defended Jimmy's actions during his Minnesota Massacre, putting him over KAT, who he loves so dearly he makes funny basketball with starring Steve urkel as well. they'd be good for each other because they're willing to help stabilize each other! While thinking they themselves need no stability in return (which they Do. Desperately). man who thinks he is always right and man who thinks he is always right.... on paper it sounds terrible because it is BUT DUDE JUST TRUST ME !! Paul makes fun of jimmy for finding a new sport to want to play in (right now it's tennis.. for some reason) and Jimmy makes fun of Paul for ragequitting in Call of Duty. Their relationship is one people in highschool would give like. 2 days max. And they're right because they break up after 2 days.... then get back together in 5. Then break up in 3 and get back BACK together in 4 and etcetc. Dennis rodman was the son they would have had. This makes no sense and that's how they (and i) like it !

Alt Jimmy ships that are NOT kyle lowry #2: Kyrie Irving

The 'divas' of the nba... i think jimmy wants to put kyrie in a glass jar and observe him. Kyrie kind of wants to do the same to jimmy but also he's scared of him? WHAT I MEAN IS... jimmy watches kyrie douse all his relationships with gasoline and torches, shackles kd, and thinks (because he is insane), I Want That. i think.. kyrie can be Evil because it's Funny. He supports & encourages kyrie's girlbossing! He WANTS it. But he doesn't want 'normal' kyrie though, only the entertaining one. Meanwhile kyrie, who likes being normal kyrie it's just really hard to have that stability when being evil is an option, thinks of jimmy who's ONLY been around him when kyries girlbossing & is like. This guy is crazy. When the Timberwolves drama was about, everyone was talking about jimmy joining with kyrie and going somewhere. Because jimmy made it seem like they were such good friends. But then they asked kyrie about the teamup rumors and kyrie basically said 'we haven't talked since the Olympics. I don't know why this man thinks of me so much. These rumors make no sense'

In SHORT... they seem really funny to me 😭 two people who belong in glass terrariums to protect the public looking at each other and thinking 'THAT guy needs to be put in a TERRARIUM.' Will they work out? ....probably not

I think.... Andrew had/still has a LITTLE crush on jimmy. BMM (Before Minnesota Massacre), he was so positive on jimmy and even DURING and AFTER it he was still on his butler fanclub behavior. Even his brother's butler trade comments couldn't stop Andrew 'watz poppiin!!' Wiggins' love & admiration for jimmy! And now that he's finally free from kat's constant slandering of jimmy, he's achieved True Gay Greatness in the form of winning a warriors championship. He's experienced the movie trope of greatness (1st pick rave), turmoil (bust rumors), triumph, and now all that's left is getting The Girl. Jimmy ALREADY likes him i mean, he's had nothing but nice things to say about wiggs which is how you KNOW jimmy likes him because jimmy never has nice things to say about Anybody <- real other player analysis!!! Andrew just wanted to be the Scottie to Jimmy's mj and complications stopped that! BUT NOW THEY DON'T H A VE TO !! let JIMMY and WIGGINS kiss‼️‼️ that'll finally prove that jimmy only had beef with Kat because he was straight-coded so obviously that made him the enemy. We could finally tie the pretty bow that he Wiggins Fairytale DESERVES

Alt jimmy ships that are NOT kyle lowry #3: Andrew Wiggins

(And they WERE a problem.. just to their own team tho lmao)

Alt jimmy ships that are NOT kyle lowry #4: Russell Westbrook

imma be honest... this one was just cus i said so LMAO. It's kinda like marcus/giannis where I just like their personalities and think they'd be even greater put together. The two psychopaths in their primes of the nba? Together? yes PLEASE!!! also they both love fashion <3 i need them to match croptops... please. Russell i BEG of you i BEG. They're girlbosses and no one understands them BUT them! Bein fr though i think they could be surprisingly soft together mainly due to their known big personalities overlapping their genuine duality. I jusf wan them 2... cuddle 🥰🥰 p...lease. they both deserve it so bad . They could protect each other from The Horrors (str8 sports fans)

Alt jimmy ships that are NOT kyle lowry #5: Joel Embiid with Ben Simmons honorable mention

Now THIS one is DEFINITELY asshole4asshole. Everyone thought they'd tear each other apart, which they did yeah.... but they also LOVED each other FOR it. Joel was someone jimmy could push and would be grateful for it. A fellow natural competitor even when it came to something as trivial as hot wings eating. They could talk shit to each other then high-five the next day, they don't care. Not only do their competitive drives make for good chemistry in the bed... but also just really good in general. Because it's HEALTHY competition. No one took anything as negative, just fuel for being better. Something they both desire on unbelievable levels. That's how they GOT here, after all!! The two most popular mean girl cheerleaders who ruthlessly clawed their way up the highschool food chain & only entertain the dumb football players around them for fun, that's them... and then one of them had to move 😐. Years later they meet again at the highschool reunion to discover one is stuck in a dried up marriage with a dried up star athlete and the other is stuck CHASING marriages. WHEN WILL THEY DISCOVER THEIR TRUE LOVES WERE IN EACH OTHER THE WHOLE TIME???? we may never know..... they may never know.. until it's too Late 😔.

Also Ben is there because of that one sus comment

Alt jimmy ships that's NOT kyle lowry #6: Tyler Herro

Yall ready know bout this one but... yeah 😭.. honestly all of these ships reinforce the fact that jimmy is insane, but this is probably like the MOST ship ship for that . I have no words that have not already been said by your greatness on YOUR blog, dr ! ill just leave this here

Alt jimmy ships that ARENT kyle lowry #7: Bam Adebayo

bam and jimmy were smart-ass for smart-ass and i MISS them!!! Their lil headbutts.. their INTERVIEWS. They both HAVE to be right and HAVE to be smart and HAVE to be funny. Seeing them interact was 😭 smthin. They was always doin smthin!!!!

Insane.

I have some thoughts in relation to the bam herro kyle dynamic here vvv

so ill link that!! but BASICALLY.... smartass smartass dumbass GOOD. smartass smartass SMARTASS dumbass..... we have some work to do . .

#THANK YOU for this ask it was VERY fun to do! #jimmy is such a fun personality it's easy for some ppl to forget it's multi facilitated !! #so i leaned to choosin more ppl who could either like heighten his personality or draw more out of it #n APPRECIATE it #BUT YEA!!! #some of my thots!!! #might add more who knows! #honorable ship mention also being!! #kyle/demar/jimmy #love their ot3 <3 #jimmy #bam #pg13 years old #indeed embiid #russy west #ted asks

[popentertainment-moviereviews]

SPACE JAM: A NEW LEGACY (2021)

Starring LeBron James, Don Cheadle, Khris Davis, Sarah Silverman, Sonequa Martin-Green, Ernie Johnson, Lil Rel Howery, Kyrie Irving, Chris Paul, Draymond Green, Kyle Kuzma, Chiney Ogwumike, Michael B. Jordan and the voices of Jeff Bergman, Eric Bauza, Zendaya, Bob Bergen, Jim Cummings, Gabriel Iglesias, Candi Milo, Paul Julian (archival recordings), Klay Thompson, Anthony Davis, Damian Lillard, Diana Taurasi and Nneka Ogwumike.

Screenplay by Juel Taylor, Tony Rettenmaier, Keenan Coogler, Terence Nance, Jesse Gordon and Celeste Ballard.

Directed by Malcolm D. Lee.

Distributed by Warner Bros. Pictures. 115 minutes. Rated PG.

If you are going to revisit a popular family film franchise after 25 years, you should bring something new to it, right?

I mean, other than replacing the star, changing it from the most accomplished basketball player in the world at the time to the new most accomplished basketball player in the world. (Going from Michael Jordan in the original to LeBron James here – neither of whom are known for their acting, although in fairness James has more experience in film than Jordan did.)

And certainly, you would come up with something other than changing the classic Looney Tunes characters from traditional hand-drawn to computer animation about halfway through the film? I’m sorry, but the idea of turning the Looney Tunes characters into CGI rather than pencil and ink is just sacrilege. (I know there have previously been some shorts with the characters filmed in CGI, but that was sacrilege as well.)

We do appreciate the lack of a R. Kelly song on the soundtrack, but otherwise, what does Space Jam: A New Legacy really have to offer a new generation of fans that they can’t get from just streaming the original?

My big question after watching Space Jam: A New Legacy is simple: It took six people to write this?

Look, the truth is the live action stuff was pretty corny and much of the CGI basketball game was kind of silly. But… a big BUT… the middle section with hand-drawn animation is actually surprisingly clever and funny. It almost makes the film worth watching all on its own.

A section in which a cartoon LeBron James and some favorite characters crash through the Warner Bros. film archive and find themselves thrown into classic films and cartoons was particularly good – a Casablanca-era Ingrid Bergman saying “Play it, Sam” with the camera shifting to Yosemite Sam made me laugh out loud.

There was also a shrewd takeoff on Batman and Superman and several other WB properties (and a few from other studios). If the entire film were as clever as this, I would heartily endorse it. In fact, that whole middle section gives me a bit of a warm feeling towards Space Jam: A New Legacy. It turns out to be better than it could be, and that’s something, right?

By the way, for a film called Space Jam, there was no outer space footage in the film. The whole thing actually took place in a computer server, so it’s more like inner space or The Matrix.

The family footage in which LeBron tries to connect with his young son is kind of sappy, but I suppose it is necessary to drive the narrative forward. Even once they change over from illustrated characters to CGI basketball avatars, there are some funny moments, like a clever cameo by Michael B. Jordan playing up on his name similarity to the star of the original film.

The CGI characters still bugged me though. I know they are trying to lure a new generation of viewers, but I may never be able to unsee a CGI Porky Pig rapping – without a stammer – like a porcine Mel Tillis who loses his stutter while performing. (Yes, I understand that outdated topical reference is totally dating me, and most people going to see this Space Jam movie will have no clue who Mel Tillis was, but I’m sticking with the comparison. Look it up if you really want to know what I mean.)

Still, the middle section is clever enough to almost be a game changer for Space Jam: A New Legacy. It ends up missing the buzzer beater, but there was enough good play in the paint to make it a tight contest.

Jay S. Jacobs

Copyright ©2021 PopEntertainment.com. All rights reserved. Posted: July 17, 2021.

#Space Jam: A New Legacy #2021 #Movie Review #LeBron James #Jay S. Jacobs

[rbrown2019-blog]

Why the Golden State Warriors will NOT win the 2019 NBA Championship

 Edit 1: 4/20

Yes, you read it here. The Warriors will not complete their ever so wanted 3-peat, nor do I think they will even make it to the NBA finals. I believe that the Houston Rockets or the Milwaukee Bucks have the greatest chance of taking down the defending champions. In this blog, I am going to break down the starting lineup match-ups, as well as each teams’ offensive and defensive play-style.

Rockets vs Warriors

How will the Rockets beat the Warriors? The Pick and Roll. Clearly, the Warriors can’t handle the Clippers’ Lou Williams isolation ball/pick and roll game, as he lead the Clippers charge putting up a 36 points-11 assists stat line in Game Two AT the Oracle. If the Warriors can’t stop the Clippers’ offensive moves, please explain to me how they will be able to stop James Harden and Chris Paul? With Demarcus Cousins now being ruled out for the rest of the playoffs, you might have better defense with Andrew Bogut. But let’s not forget about that 3 point line, the true reason why the Rockets are so deadly. As a team in the regular season, they averaged a total of 16, made 3s per game; second being the Milwaukee Bucks at 13.5 (NBA Stats). 

Edit 2: 4/21 Continuation of Rockets Analysis

Running the offense through James Harden and Chris Paul opens up so many opportunities for them to score, as well as the other 3 or 4 guys on the court, all ready to shoot. Double teamed? Kick it out to Eric Gordon or P.J Tucker. The Warriors are protecting the 3? Lob it up to Clint Capela or Kenneth Faried. Thus, the Rockets just have too many weapons in their starting 5 and off the bench that can torch the Warriors on any given night.

Now yes, The Warriors have their big 4 in Durant, Curry, Klay, and Draymond. And yes, the Rockets don’t have the greatest defense. The big difference is, the Warriors do not really have that guy to throw the lob to, now that Demarcus Cousins is out. When they set up their own pick and roll, they can easily attack coverages such as switches and hard hedges, just like the Rockets. Their one big piece they now lack is a big man to throw the lob to on the roll. Draymond Green, an undersized 6′7 forward is a great option, but I believe he won’t match up against the Rockets bigs, (please prove me wrong). The Warriors do indeed have a man named Kevin Durant, who can get you 30 on any given night. I truly believe he is the X Factor to this series, and it all depends on how many shots he wants to take a game. He needs to quiet the media and haters and prove to them that this is his team, not Curry’s. 

EDIT 3, 5/3: Warriors vs Rockets: Games 1-3

Wow. All I have to say. This has been a very entertaining series, from on the court to off the court. If you are an NBA fan, you couldn't ask for anything more, except if you are James Harden or the Rockets. Yes the Warriors are up 2-1 in the series, but the big ref scandal on not knowing their own rule they created a couple of seasons ago about closing out on a player is absolutely ridiculous. Mr. Scott Foster was the main target for this blame, since it was in his zone. The problem was, none of the refs attempted to call it, even if it was in his zone. There were many occurrences of it, mainly that James Harden was apart of. He is known for initiating contact with a defender, but the Warriors players gave him nowhere to land after he shot. Though the Rockets are still in this series, a stolen game at the Oracle will come up big down the road.

Throughout the series, we have seen tempers flare, terrible acting, and Steve Kerr doing absolutely nothing this whole series except trolling the internet and the Houston Rockets. Very funny, but we all know the Warriors could win it all with any head coach. Harsh words, but give the ball to Kevin Durant- just like they did in the 4th quarter of game 3- and watch magic happen. It is unbelievable how good of a player he is. He can do it all, and I do truly believe it is HIS team. Steph Curry may be a fan favorite, but KD is showing up day in and day out, just look at his playoff numbers, he is averaging 36 points on 51 percent shooting. Like I said, Kevin Durant is truly the X factor for the Warriors, it all depends on how many shots he takes, and how many shots they let him take in a row. This man is the definition of streaky, and the Warriors have yet to use him to his full potential.

Edit #4, 5/5: Warriors vs Rockets Games 4 and 5

As the series has gone on, we have seen a lot more flopping, acting, and numerous maneuvers in order to exploit the referees and get a call. These games in my eyes are turning into plays, while each act is a quarter. You never know what is going to happen next from these guys. #BringBack90sBasketball . Now if you know 90s basketball you may think I am contradicting myself saying I do not like trash talk and miniature fights in basketball, but I am trying to say that these days the refs immediately blow their whistles for a technical if you stare someone down, or talk trash a player. This whole series has been a prime example of what I explained above, and it needs to stop.

Despite the flopping and complaining, we got to see Kevin Durant and James Harden both take over in Game 4, and it was a fun scoring battle to watch. James Harden ended up scoring 38 points, while KD led his team in scoring with 34. A great battle between each of these players in the fourth quarter, but the Rockets ended up tying up the series 2-2 after some missed clutched three pointers by Steph Curry and Kevin Durant. 

Steph Curry. Has yet to REALLY show up for his team yet. Yes he is still putting up great numbers, but not MVP type of numbers we expect to see from this man. From the missed layups and the wide open threes, Curry has really struggled to put the ball in the net when his team needs it, ESPECIALLY in the fourth quarter. I will give say though he was the main reason why the Warriors brought home game 5 after KDs calf strain. But now since KD is ruled out for the series, Steph Curry really needs to start finding his shot quick in order to avoid elimination from the playoffs. I wouldn't say Austin Rivers, Shumpert, and Cp3 are 100 percent locking Steph up, but they have definitely made a major contribution to his struggles.

Edit #5, 5/7: Could the Raptors be a new rival? 

Never thought I would say this, but the Raptors are actually looking great in the PLAYOFFS. We all know Kawhi Leonard has been putting his team on his back and making up for the “Playoff Lowry” jokes that have been happening, but Marc Gasol and Pascal Siakam have really stepped up their game. Gasol has been rock solid offensively, and has really stepped up defensively when it comes to guarding the post or contesting shots. Not to mention, Marc Gasol is creating shots for his teammates, and taking a major gap out of the equation that the Raptors have of depth in the front-court. Also, Paskal Siakam has continued to show us why he will be a offensive and defensive star for many years to come. He is averaging 22 points per game, 1 steal, 1 block, and 7 rebounds a game. Those are some amazing stats coming from a player who averaged 7 points last season in the playoffs. Hats off to both of these guys, as well as the rest of the Raptors role players, for shutting down the Sixers offense.

Kawhi Leonard. The Raptors 100 percent made the right move by bringing him and Danny Green over to the 6. I couldn't be more proud of him, after sitting out a whole season due to his situation with the Spurs, he has been the second or third best player right now in the NBA. He has greatly handled Jimmy Butler and the Sixers defense, averaging 31 points this postseason, to go with an effective field goal percentage (EFG) of 61.2 percent. Not to mention, his Player Efficiency Rating (PER) has been 31.2, which is off the charts. As the article I linked said it, he is a Defensive player of the year putting up 30 points a game; that deserves comparisons to the Greatest of all Time, Michael Jordan. We will see if he can continue this high level play, especially against teams like the Bucks, and if they can get to the NBA finals, the Western Conference. 

Edit 6 5/8: How the Blazers can Defeat the Warriors

We all remember Damian Lillard telling reporters he believe the Blazers will win the series in 6 games. That turned into a meme real quick. Now that the Warriors have lost: some of their firepower on defense, the new weapons the Blazers have added, and the emerging of a superstar back-court in Dame and CJ, the Blazers truly match-up with these high flying defending champions. They will need to make a little magic happen-especially at the Oracle Arena- if they want to take this series and advance to the NBA finals assuming they beat the Nuggets.

First off, Damian Lillard has been the definition of clutch, along with Steph Curry. In my eyes, we are seeing the number 1 and number 2 point guard duel each other in the Western Conference Finals. Dame and CJ need to be able to out-shoot their perimeter based offensive, or this series will go downhill very fast. Portland will also need to use their size effectively to counter post touches from Kevin Durant. This will easily be their greatest challenge of the series, because we know both team’s back-courts can score at ease, but can Nurkic and Aminu shut down the best pure scorer in the league. Otherwise, I see the Warriors not having the biggest problem against this Blazers squad.

Edit 7 5/9: The Nuggets Bigs’ are the Key

This blog is turning out to be talking about each team left in the playoffs and talking about how they have a chance on taking down the defending champions. I am totally ok with it, but from a readers standpoint, it may seem very annoying. This Nuggets team really succeeded in the regular season, though then again, it is the regular season. The main key to their success was their ball movement, and their patience. Unlike the Rockets- and for some games the Warriors- the Nuggets use the whole 24 seconds given to them most of the time in order to get a shot off. The fast pace threes are greater than twos game the Warriors play is not their type of game. The Nuggets need to make sure their game is being played, and they are not rushing.

Taking a look at their roster, they are led by the 7 foot point guard/center Jokic, key role players in Will Barton, Garry Harris, and Paul Millsap. Finally, they have an emerging star in Jamal Murray. I love and been loving this mans game ever sine his days in Kentucky; a high flying, electric, fun to watch and impossible to hate player. I see his game very similar to Damian Lillard, the man he is going up against right now in the Western Conference Semifinals. It has been very fun to see both of them go at each other. 

Getting back on track, the Warriors lack the size and depth of bigs on their squad, so if Millsap and Jokic will have a field day going against Draymond and Looney if the Nuggets give them post touches. If the post isn't working, both of these big man are great play-makers, and are willing to set another player up for an open shot. On defense, the Nuggets might have a tough time guarding perimeter shots and the pick and roll/pop offense the Warriors run. Though this team has some great defenders in Will Barton and Garry Harris-who will need to be constantly on Curry and Thompson- they must protect the perimeter and be ok to give up lobs and post-up baskets. The Warriors do not completely live and die by the three, and are willing to distribute the ball, so the Nuggets need to be aware of the extra pass and weak side ball screens and cuts the Warriors do to free Curry and Klay. As for Durant, he will get his shot no matter what, but the Nuggets need to make sure they double team him in the post, preferably with their two bigs.

Edit 8 5/10: The Rockets are sent home

Despite Kevin Durant being ruled out for Game 6, the Warriors took the series after a dominating performance by the Warriors back-court Steph Curry and Klay Thompson. I am truly happy for them, both of them started to find their shot and consistency that they have been burning the NBA with during the regular season. Though lets not get ahead of ourselves here, Curry did score 0 points in the first half, and Klay Thompson got off to a decent start. Despite that the game was still neck and neck in the 1st half. Yes, the Rockets deserved to lose this one. Though, from what I watched, there is nobody truly to blame. As Jonathan Fiegen puts it in his article reflecting on the game, James Harden did not fail. He did not succeed, either. No one can claim that he did in another loss, another season ending in frustration. But as much as many will blame him for the latest playoff loss and use it to define him as had been promised even before the game began in the event of a Rockets loss, if he is to be ripped now, they are talking about games of his past. This is a perfect explanation of tonight's game in terms of a Rocket fan’s shoe. I would though argue they should have been up by more at halftime due to the offensive struggle the Warriors had, but not every game is winnable.

 Edit 9 5/11: Bucks Analysis

This is the team I expect to be in the NBA finals, and now that the Rockets are gone, the team I want to win it all (in case you didn't know or infer from my previous edits, I don’t really like the Warriors). I am now going to break down the match-ups, and how I think the Bucks can really take advantage of the Warriors fast paced, high flying offense.

Currently, all I know is that Kevin Durant's leg is going to be re-examined in a week, but I am going to assume that he is going to play in the NBA finals. That will be Giannis’ or maybe Kris Middleton's assignment. As I have said for the past teams, Kevin Durant will get his shot, the Bucks just need to make sure that the shots that they give him are not full isolation plays ran for him. As for the back-court, I am really confident that Bledsoe and Middleton have the defensive ability to lock up Curry and Thompson. Both of them are solid defenders who have the ability to guard such of players. 

The Giannis Durant match-up is one for the century. Two freaks of nature dueling out with one another for the championship (assuming that is the finals match-up). Both of these players are in their MVP form, and certainly showing it these playoffs, but I believe Durant has the slight edge over him due to his experience in these very intense situations. I fear is the lack of experience this team has. The NBA Playoffs are a whole different type of basketball, not to mention that the NBA finals are the best of the best basketball. We will see if Giannis can continue to perform how he has been all season. Otherwise, the Warriors are most likely seeing a 3-peat.

This is an English Project, I am not a professional blogger nor do I have any experience in blogging. I will continue to update this blog as the playoffs go on, as that is one of the requirements for getting full credit.

#English Project #NBA #nba playoffs #golden state warriors #houston rockets #milwaukee bucks #debate #kevin durant #stephen curry #james harden #chris paul #giannis antetokounmpo #khris middleton #draymond green #demarcus cousins #klay thompson

[mindlesssportsguru-blog]

2018 NBA Conference Finals

Well, we have officially reached the time of year where all that stands between us and the painful summer months of baseball season is the NHL and NBA playoffs. With the meat of the MLB season quickly approaching, I decided to focus on the last exciting sports story until NFL training camp starts up in August, detailing the final four teams remaining in the NBA playoffs.

Traditionally, the NBA playoffs are notorious for being predictable, lopsided affairs in which the team that was expected to win from the beginning, wins. Since 2000, the sport has been plagued by dynasties, meaning that certain franchises are so dominant over a span of several years that no other teams seem to have a chance. Whether it be the Tim Duncan-led San Antonio Spurs (1999-2007), the Los Angeles Lakers (2000-2002, 2009-2010), or the LeBron James-led Miami Heat (2011-2014), big market franchises monopolize the sport for several years at a time. The last couple years have been no different, as the Golden State Warriors formed a squad that would go on to win two of three championships, with the one loss coming at the hands of The King: LeBron James. After posting an incredible 73 win season (NBA record) and blowing a 3-1 lead (never forget) to James and company, the basketball gods gave everyone in the entire world the middle-finger when former-MVP Kevin Durant decided to take his talents to the Bay Area, joining Steph Curry, Klay Thompson, and Draymond Green in a star-studded lineup. After much speculation on whether this team would gel correctly and blow everyone out of the water, the Warriors slashed and devastated their way through the 2017 playoffs with a record of 16-1 (T-NBA record), topped off with yet another title. Following this basketball killing spree by the Warriors, the rest of the NBA seemed to be in the sunken place, watching the new and improved “Lineup of Death” (yeah, that’s literally what they’re called) ravage the rest of the sport.

Fast forward to now. We are nearly a year removed from Durant nailing that three in LeBron’s face in game five, and things are relatively the same as they were then. The Warriors are PROBABLY going to win again, and they are PROBABLY going to beat LeBron’s Cavaliers in the Finals for the third time in four years. This post could end after that sentence, but where’s the fun in that? With both Conference Finals surprisingly knotted up at two games a piece, the next week could dictate the landscape of the NBA for several years to come. With the title (seemingly) up for grabs, here is some context on the two matchups thus far, and what each team must do to hoist the Larry O’Brien trophy in June.

The East

Over the last 15 years, the rest of the Eastern Conference has served as the Avengers equivalent to LeBron James’ Thanos (sorry to anyone who hasn’t seen Infinity War). Every couple years, there seems to be a Thor-like team who looks like they may have what it takes to derail The King, and every couple years LeBron is forced to snap his fingers and eviscerate that “challenger” from existence. The Paul George Pacers, the Derrick Rose Bulls, and the Al Horford Hawks (lol) have been LeBron’s biggest competition, which is the equivalent to an average sized man standing in front of an Escalade traveling 80 mph thinking “Hey I might have a chance at stopping this thing.” Bottom line: LeBron James is a force the likes of the NBA has never seen before. These playoffs have been no different up to this point, as LeBron has single-handedly led this group to the conference finals. Averaging a ludicrous 33.7 points on 55% shooting, LeBron is on a mission to reach an unprecedented eighth consecutive NBA Finals. After being pushed to seven games in the first round against a gritty Pacers team, the Cavs embarrassed a 59 win Raptors squad, a team that has been stopped in their tracks by LeBron for years now. With his game-winning buzzer beater in game five, LeBron ripped the hearts out of every player and fan associated with the franchise, including famous rapper Drake, who had been chirping James from the sidelines throughout the series. The Cavs would go on to decimate the Raptors in game four, leading to the firing of Head Coach Dwane Casey, a Coach of the Year candidate.

What has been most noteworthy about this Cavaliers team is the absence of anything resembling a supporting cast. Other than Kevin Love who, when healthy, is an all star caliber player, this is undoubtedly LeBron’s worst supporting cast since his first stint in Cleveland. Playing themselves into the fourth seed in the East, these Cavs looked both offensively and defensively challenged throughout the season. The strategy is simple: surround LeBron with perimeter shooters and hope it is good enough. JR Smith and Kyle Korver could be viable assets on a championship team, but both lack dimensions to their game other than perimeter shooting. Adding Jeff Green looked to be a promising move right up until the playoffs, when everyone remembered Jeff Green is a bonafide playoff scrub. Many players came and went this season through various “panic trades” the Cavs made in an attempt to appease The King. Jordan Clarkson, Rodney Hood, and Larry Nance Jr. are all solid role players, but their ability to compete against the likes of Golden State or Houston is seriously doubtful.

The most glaring absence from this squad is all star PG Kyrie Irving, who voiced his dissatisfaction with the Cavs last year and was traded to the Boston Celtics. For the last seven years, LeBron has always had a “sidekick” to help in his quest for the Finals, and Kyrie was just that. Kyrie’s performance in the legendary 3-1 comeback against Golden State was nothing short of transcendent, and his scoring prowess is widely respected throughout the league. His departure from the Cavs this off-season certainly took a toll on the Cavaliers’ internal situation, and perhaps more importantly, created an Eastern Conference foe unlike any LeBron has faced in the last ten years.

Enter the Boston Celtics, arguably the greatest franchise in the history of the sport. General Manager Danny Ainge has worked like a maestro the last five years, acquiring draft picks and assets like low hanging fruit. More importantly, he scored big time with his last two first round picks, Jaylen Brown and Jayson Tatum. These two potential all stars, in conjunction with defensive expert and “team dad” Al Horford have created a threatening team in the East, playing themselves into the two seed. What is more impressive, however, is that Boston is without their two best players. PG Kyrie Irving and SF Gordon Hayward. After losing these two stars over the course of the regular season Boston has seen tremendous support from role players such as Marcus Smart, Marcus Morris, and Terry Rozier.

So, how does this team match up with the Cavaliers? Surprisingly, the Celtics can stand toe-to-toe with the Cavaliers and have been very successful thus far. While the Celtics cannot match LeBron’s size, speed, and athleticism, their role players have been outperforming the Cavs’ up to this point. Their outstanding bench, along with terrific performances at home are going to make this team a tough out for the Cavaliers. That being said, let’s bring this back to the Marvel Universe. With all my heart, I would love to see the good guys come back and defeat Thanos. It almost feels like it needs to happen. As much as I want to believe in the Celtics and their youth movement, I simply cannot pick against LeBron James until it is proven that he can lose. Whether it be next year or in 2026, LeBron will eventually decline, but this is not the team that is going to get it done. PREDICTION: Cavs in 6.

The West

No matter which team comes out of the East, they are going to have their work cut out for them against the Western Conference Champion. In one corner, we have the Golden State Warriors. You can learn pretty much everything you need to know about this team in a couple sentences, so here it goes.

This is the greatest team ever assembled. Period. End of story. A lot of romantics like to look back on the days of Michael Jordan’s Bulls and say that they could defeat this Warriors team, but that is wrong. At point guard, the Warriors have Steph Curry, who has broken the NBA 3PT record for 4 consecutive years, and is widely regarded as the best shooter in the history of the game. He led this team to a 73 win season without Kevin Durant, and is the engine that makes the team roll. Did I mention he is a two-time NBA league MVP?

Next up, we have Klay Thompson and Draymond Green. Thompson is widely known as the second best shooter in NBA history, which is a bit ridiculous that he is teamed up with Curry. His ability to knock down shots and get hotter than Hell in a matter of minutes is terrifying for any team they play against, especially considering he is their third best offensive weapon. He is also a flexible defender, specializing in taking out the other team’s best perimeter scorer. Draymond is a freak defender. While Klay is an outstanding perimeter defender, it is Draymond’s versatility that makes him unique. He can guard every position on the floor, making him a valuable asset that allows the Warriors to play their “Lineup of Death”. He also possesses a terrific basketball IQ, allowing him to run the pick and roll with Curry to perfection.

Those three together form an unstoppable core that allowed them to set the NBA record for wins in a season. Any team in the league would find it nearly impossible to matchup with all three of them. Now that we have finished covering the Warriors, let’s move o-...wait...wait a minute...nevermind we’re not done talking about the Warriors. If those three players weren’t enough, God thought it would be funny if the Warriors went out and signed all-time great scorer Kevin Durant, a former MVP. His 6’11” frame matched with his ability to handle the ball and shoot from anywhere on the court make him a lethal weapon. Many consider him to be the best pure scorer in NBA history, and he has certainly earned that type of reputation. He is the second best player in the NBA, behind LeBron, and now rather than having to score on his own, he can play his part in the well oiled machine of the Golden State Warriors. Before KD, the Warriors were probably going to win the championship. With KD, it is nearly a foregone conclusion.

Unless the Houston Rockets have anything to say about it. The Rockets were constructed specifically to defeat the Warriors, and thus far they have performed, tying the series 2-2 last night in Oakland. Built around All-Pro scorer James Harden and the “Point God” Chris Paul, the Rockets won 65 games during the regular season, leading the league. With those two ball handlers on the team, the Rockets can play night in and night out with 48 minutes of elite ball handling and decision making. Their role players are primarily perimeter shooters, and they play their roles to perfection. To bring it all together, C Clint Capela has proved himself to be an elite rim protector and scorer inside, perhaps garnering a max contract this offseason.

With stars like James Harden and Chris Paul, this team looks poised to make a run into the NBA Finals. They have great coaching, a great scorer, a great point guard, and a greater than average bench. These are all the aspects we usually see in a Championship team. However, if you have not realized yet, I am more so a realist than a romantic, and I do not believe the Rockets will beat the Warriors. The Warriors have been to this point for the fourth consecutive season now, and their experience will be tested over the next three games. That experience coupled with their ability to rip your throat out at any given point with their three point shooting, makes me believe they will not only defeat the Rockets in six games, but they will go on to win the NBA Finals in four games (five if they feel like being nice). PREDICTION: Warriors in 6.

[whatifitscool]

Friday Nights at the Crowe’s Nest

By Daniel-Paul Crowe

I don’t know about you, but Friday night’s as a kid was awesome.

Let me take you back to the glorious 90’s when things were more simple.

It’s 3:45pm on a Friday afternoon,

I just finished school and Mum is picking me up to take me to KFC for a nugget kids meal as a reward for not getting in trouble (at home or at school) during the week and for doing all my homework.

By 6pm Mum has made dinner, me and the whole family would sit at the table and share the meal.

Fast forward to 7:30pm, Dad walks into the lounge (The Crowe’s Nest) with a plate of savoy crackers, cheese and a jar Vegimite (I don’t care if you think Vegimite is yuck, that $h!+ is awesome), and everyone would be waiting in there. Dad would set up the VCR and pop in a tape (usually with a run time of 4 hours). Dad during the week had made a compilation tape of tv shows that everyone in the family loved.

And this was the night we would sit together as a family and watch It.

 Every tape would start with an episode of Family Matters https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KS6yHCOp3WY

A great show the resembled a family much like mine.

Hard working, always bickering, God fearing and at the core of it all, loved each other no matter what.

This was my families go to show simply because of the character Steve Urkel.

That guy was one of the reasons why I wanted to be a scientist as a kid (Now I do a podcast for a living).

I can remember Mum and Dad crying with laughter every time he would do something funny.

One scene that comes to mind is this scene

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hcvhXup2k8

I remember saying to my parents how did they all fit in that car?

Dad’s response was always “TV Magic”.

It was always a fun show to watch.

 The next show that came on would be Step by Step

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9nFkEdROqQ

Another show about a family, but this time it was kinda like a newer version of The Brady Bunch.

This one was more of Mum’s favourite as me and Dad didn’t laugh as much but we still enjoyed it never the less. My memories of this show was seeing mum giggle at the antics of Patrick Duffy and Suzanne Somers. In many ways looking back, I think Mum saw a lot of herself and my Dad in their characters on that show. That theme song is still stuck in my head, even after nearly 30 years I can still hear it and I’m love it.

 The next show was easily one of my Fav’s, a show that I’m still surprised not many people here in Australia remember. The show was called Hangin With Mr. Cooper

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxeBAkrj2TI

I’m not sure if my parents liked it because I don’t remember them laughing at all.

This was usually the point of the night when Dad would start passing out the Savoy crackers, go have a smoke and pay a visit to the toilet.

I loved this show simply because of the basketball references.

Growing up like most kids in the 90’s I was into basketball.  

In particular Players Michael Jordan and Charles Barkley.

Seeing a show that was about a former basketball player turned teacher really made me want to watch.

The theme song is still dope. For me this show was my Cosby Show in terms of humor, plus it had Raven-Symone so the connection to that show was there.  

Mark Curry was always funny as Mr. Cooper, I can always remember him dancing and me trying to copy it. One of the best moments of this show was when Charles Barkley appeared

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nKP8NqO-wo

I lost my mind because I never thought id see him on the show.

I’m hoping I can get this on DVD, that is If it’s ever released here in Australia.

 The last sitcom that would come on would be full house.

Easily Dad’s favourite (He was A John Stamos/Beach Boys Fan).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2EL65KLdEHE

this one back in the day was awesome, wasn’t also my favourite but whenever Uncle Joey would come on screen and do those goofy voice it cracked me up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5BGpmw0MTE

Sadly I tried to watch this series again (thanks to Netflix) and it hasn’t aged well.

It’s so cheesy that you would think it was a pizza.

I think one of the main reasons I enjoyed the show was simply because of Lori Loughlin.

She was hot, Give me a break.

 After that it would either be some random movie that I would hate or a full episode of murder she wrote

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vksQlLF7JB8 .

If it was a movie I hated, I’d try to fake that I was tired and excuse myself and head to my room (didn’t always work). The movies were usually some random drama about blah blah blah or a TV biopic about blah blah blah. The only movie I can remember watching  that I liked was The Jacksons biopic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V53OfsZCaHY

Murder she wrote was always great ,even as a kid.

To this day I love murder mystery stories and this was always winner in my book.

Dame Angela Lansbury I’ve always liked cause she looked like my Nana but more nicer (Nana was very strict…but loving). Every episode was hard to work out who the killer was.

I will always remember when my dad would pause the tape and everyone had to guess who they thought the murder was and how they did it.

Mum usually got it right; I don’t think I ever got one right.

 I miss days like this, not just because of all the great shows I got to watch, but the family being together and spending quality time like this.

With the way watching tv is these days I doubt I could do this with my family now.

But hopefully once I start my own family, I can find someway to give my kids an experience like this.

#familytime #tvshows #fridaynights #friday #fridaynight #sitcom #familymatters #stepbystep #hanginwithmrcooper #fullhouse #murdershewrote #steveurkel #loriloughlin #Angela Lansbury #markcurry #90'ssitcom #80'ssitcom

[the-anti-internet]

#trypod

Hey, haven't been around in awhile. I've been "busy" over at @petesmediadiary logging (once a week, usually Sundays) all the media I consume (plugtime over). But in honor of #trypod, a campaign to make people aware of podcasts, here comes a list of all of the podcasts that I listen to with a brief description of what the podcast is about: 12 Hour Day with J.D. and Connor -- Each episode is at least 12 hours long where the hosts hang out for a day. You follow them as they hang out, and do things around New York City. (Comes out a couple of times a year) Comedy Bang Bang -- Scott Aukerman hosts where each episode he has on a comedian and other odd people come in after a brief interview segment Mike and Tom Eat Snacks -- Each episode Michael Ian Black and Tom Cavanagh Pick a snack, Eat a snack, and Rate a snack. (Currently on extended hiatus, but worth listening to the back catalogue) The Indoor Kids -- Kumail Nanjiani and his wife Emily V Gordon talk about video games and other stuff they are watching. (Also currently on hiatus, but might be coming back soon?) Womp It Up! -- Jessica St. Clair and Lennon Parham spun off their characters Marissa Wompler and Charlotte Listler from Comedy Bang Bang where Marissa has a senior project podcast from her schools library where they interview the schools faculty and other students. (Hopefully it will be back after Playing House season 3) Spontaneanation with Paul F Tompkins -- PFT has a chat with a celebrity guest and then he and some improvisors do a 30 minute long improv based on that conversation. Harmontown -- Dan Harmon has a mental breakdown on stage, and raps about having sex with your momma. The K Ohle with Kurt Braunohler -- No longer active, but it was a multi-format podcast that Kurt hosted. Pet-o-philia and Get Lost were the two best formats. Beautiful Stories from Anonymous People -- Chris Gethard takes a call from a random person and is not allowed to hang up for an hour. At the hour mark the call is ended. Surprisingly heartfelt and wonderful. My love of Gethard aside, this is a GREAT podcast. Hollywood Handbook -- Sean Clements and Hayes Davenport are two of Hollywood's elite and drop names on this red carpet we call showbiz. This is some of the hardest I have ever laughed. It does take some getting used to though. You will hate it for the first few episodes. Emotional Hangs -- Kurt Braunohler and Joe Derosa explore their friendship and break down adult friendships and try to be open and vulnerable with each other. Rose Buddies -- Griffin McElroy and his wife Rachel recap episodes of The Bachelor family of TV shows. (I have never watched an episode of The Bachelor Family of shows) You Made It Weird w/ Pete Holmes -- Pete talks about Comedy, Sex, and God with pretty much anyone (usually comedians) who will talk to him about it. (Harris Wittels #3 is one of the best episodes of a podcast I have ever heard. It's an episode where Harris is open and honest about his struggles with addiction, and he is so effortlessly funny about it too. Spoilers: While the episode ends hopeful and on a way that makes everything seem like Harris is going to turn it around, he died from an overdose less than a month after the episode was released) Who Charted? -- Howard Kremer and Kyla's Vilaysack count down the charts in Music and Movies every week. Pistol Shrimps Radio -- Matt Gourley and Mark McConville don't know anything about basketball, but that doesn't stop them from doing the play by play of a women's recreational basketball league in LA. The Worst Idea of All Time -- Guy Montgomery and Tim Batt watch and review the same movie once a week for an entire year. Year one: Grown Ups 2. Year 2: Sex and the City 2. Year 3: We Are Your Friends (currently still going) Doughboys -- Mike Mitchell and Nick Wiger review a different chain restaurant every week. My Favorite Murder -- every episode Georgia Hardstark and Karen Kilgariff each talk about a murder and go through the story of it. The Dollop -- Dave Anthony tells an American history story to his friend Gareth Reynolds who has no idea what the topic is going to be. The Adventure Zone -- The McElroy brothers and daddy play dungeons and dragons together. It's some of the best storytelling you will ever hear and it's consistently incredibly funny. Never Not Funny -- Jimmy Pardo hosts a relaxed chat with a celebrity guest. Doug Loves Movies -- Doug Benson plays movie games with comedians and funny people. Totally Beverages (and Sometimes Hot Sauce) -- Andy Rosen and Intern Josh do blind shootouts of beverages trying to figure out which is which and guess their favorites. (I "produced" episode 100, so selfishly I would suggest that episode) CoolGames Inc. -- Griffin McElroy and Nick Robinson create a new video game every week. With Special Guest Lauren Lapkus -- Every week Lauren is the guest on a different host's made up podcast. How Did This Get Made? -- Paul Scheer, Jason Mantzoukas, and June Diane Raphael talk about a different (usually) bad movie. No Such Thing As A Fish -- Writers of British panel show QI talk about their four favourite facts of the week that they learned while researching for QI. Ding-Donger with Matt Braunger -- Matt Braunger hitchhikes into your life for 30 to 45 minutes each week as he tells you what's been going on with him. Thanks for picking him up! The Bugle -- Andy Zaltzman and a rotating group of co-hosts talk about what's been going on in the world over the past week. (Formerly co-hosted by John Oliver) Competitive Erotic Fan Fiction -- Comedians write erotic fan fiction about pop culture and read it in front of a live audience. Slumber Party with Alie and Georgia -- Alie Ward and Georgia Hardstark have a guest over and they play slumber party games. What Say You? -- Sal and Q from Impractical Jokers talk about whatever is on their minds. Cardboard! With Rich Sommer -- Rich Sommer (Harry Crane from Mad Men) talks about board games. Black List Table Reads -- Franklin Leonard produces "ear movies" each episode is a table read of an unproduced screenplay. Hound Tall with Moshe Kasher -- Moshe has an expert on a topic as well as three other comedians on stage to talk about the experts subject in a town hall style meeting. Post Pink -- Justin Linville and Robby (who's last name I've forgotten) talk about Weezer's releases since Pinkerton. U Talkin' U2 To Me? -- Scott Aukerman and Adam Scott talk about everything U2 related in the dumbest way possible. Tell Us How Your Dog Died -- David Kramer and David Stoll talk to a guest about how their dog died. Legitimately one of the best earwormiest theme songs ever. Even though there hasn't been an episode (and probably won't be any more) I still find myself singing the theme song to myself fairly often. 'Till Death Do Us Blart -- The McElroy brothers and the guys from The Worst Idea of All Time Review Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 every thanksgiving for the rest of eternity. In the event of one of their deaths they are to bequeath their spot to someone else who will take the mantle. FizzyBoys -- Don Finelli and Chris Gethard review a different soda every episode. The Ones Who Knock -- A podcast that recaps every episode of Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul Decoding Westworld -- From the people who brought you The Ones Who Knock talk about Westworld. Analyze Phish -- Harris Wittels (rip) tries to convince Scott Aukerman that Phish is a good band. Andy Daly Podcast Pilot Project -- Andy Daly's many characters from Comedy Bang Bang each try to get their own podcast at earwolf. Each episode is the first episode of what their podcast would be. New Years Eve with Neil Hamburger -- Listen to Neil count down the new year! In Your Dreams with Chris Gethard -- Chris and Dream Analysis Expert Gary Richardson analyze the dreams of people who called in with a different guest each episode. End of podcasts that I'm subscribed to. Now onto podcasts that I am either working through their back catalogs, or listen to depending on the episode: My Brother, My Brother, and Me -- An advice show for the modern era, the McElroy brothers give their listeners (and Yahoo answers users) advice. Started listening in June, currently on episode 114 out of 346. Hard Nation -- A spoof on Right Wing Political talk shows. Brothers Mark and Pete Hard host a show with a different political guest (a comedian pretending to be a political figure) Dr. Gameshow -- Jo Firestone hosts a radio call in show where listeners submit their ideas for game shows and Jo has comedians play the games in studio. No longer active and the back catalog is disappearing. So get on this one quick if you want to listen. Jordan, Jesse, Go! -- Jordan Morris and Jesse Thorn talk with a different guest. (Guest dependent) Hopefully We Don't Break Up -- Couple Will Miles and Giulia Rozzi talk with other real life couples (usually at least one comedian) about their relationships. High and Mighty -- Jon Gabrus talks with a guest about something that they are both passionate about. (Guest and/or topic dependent) If I Were You -- Jake and Amir give advice to their listeners. (Guest dependent, but the Ben Schwartz, Jon Gabrus, Thomas Middleditch, And Rose McIver episodes are all must listens) The Adventures of Danny and Mike -- Danny Tamberelli and Mike Maronna (better known as Pete and Pete) go on a monthly adventure together. I Was There Too -- Matt Gourley talks to an actor with a small-ish role on a big movie. Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend -- Alison Rosen talks to a person of note. (Guest dependent) This Feels Terrible -- Erin McGathy talks to people about relationships and why they make people feel terrible. Fitzdog Radio -- Greg Fitzsimmons interviews (usually) another comedian. (Guest dependent) 100 Words or Less -- Interviews with musicians. (Guest dependent) Going Off Track -- Interviews with musicians. (Guest dependent) The Best Show with Tom Scharpling -- Tom Scharpling's long running radio talk show. I don't have enough time in my week to listen to this every week, but whenever I can squeeze it n it's always worth it. The JV Club -- Janet Varney interviews People about what they were like in their formative years and then plays M.A.S.H. with them. (Guest dependent) Put Your Hands Together -- The audio recording of the weekly standup show hosted by Cameron Esposito and Rhea Butcher. The Todd Glass Show -- Todd Glass has a guest and it's just non-stop bits. There we go. There are all of the podcasts that I listen to regularly (or at least check in with regularly). There should be something in there for everyone. You're a champion for reading all the way through this, and if you try one of these and like it, please let me know. I would be happy to talk about any of them.

#trypod #12 hour day #comedy bang bang #mike and tom eat snacks #the indoor kids #womp it up #Spontaneanation #Harmontown #The K Ohle #beautiful anonymous #Hollywood handbook #emotional Hangs #Rose Buddies #You Made it Weird #Who Charted #pistol shrimps radio #Worst Idea Of All Time #Doughboys #My Favorite Murder #The Dollop #The Adventure Zone #Never Not Funny #Doug Loves Movies #Totally Beverages #CoolGames Inc #With Special Guest Lauren Lapkus #How Did This Get Made #No Such Thing As A Fish #Ding Donger with Matt Braunger #The Bugle

[gmafbcm]

Merry New Year!

I listen to a fucking ton of podcasts. Here are a few I don’t miss. Grouped but not ranked. Tried to include a favorite or representative episode for each. I don’t know what platform you listen to things on so I went with firm specific or top google results for each.

Finance: the bulk of my listening goes to my favorite topic

RopesTalk: Ropes and Gray does a great job of providing concise insight on legal issues primarily in finance and IP.  Quick hit on CDS

Conversations with Tyler: I didn’t know where to put this one but Tyler Cowen is a great economist and has surprisingly good questions no matter the topic. Matt Levine is good one to start with 

HBR Idea Cast: Long running pod from the Harvard Business Review. Here is this year’s econ Nobel winner Esther Duflo

Invest Like the Best: Patrick O'Shaughnessy of O'Shaughnessy Asset Management talks to investors of all stripes. Here is a great ep with @modestproposal

Macro Musings: David Beckworth of Mercatus Center at George Mason University talks econ and markets in depth. A good one with Chris Crowe from Capula

Macro Voices: the host Erik Townsend is not particularly impressive but he gets some fine guests. Chris Cole the CIO of Artemis has done two strong episodes both linked within

Exchanges at Goldman Sachs: amazing guest and interviewers across the board. Can’t go wrong with this one.  The parting spot from Gary Cohn is very good

Morgan Stanley Ideas: discussions from the research team at MS. My favorite is when they examine “cypto currencies” through the lens of other pretend money like western Massachusetts’s BerkShares

Quantcast: from Risk.net if you really want to get into the weeds there are few better. Mats Kjaer, one of the most talented risk quants out there, formerly of Barclays now at Bloomberg shares his latest on capital valuation adjustment   

Reorg: a go to for distressed, BK, liquidations, and debt litigation. A good example of what to expect is their latest on new issuance covenant trends

Top Traders Unplugged: a back and forth with more quant focused, CTA, and trend following traders. Not sure how they swung this one but they bagged the founders of a visionary shop AHL. Michael Adam, David Harding, founder and CEO of Winton Group, and Martin Lueck, co-founder and president of Aspect Capital

Debtwire: broad based coverage on levered finance throughout that side of the capital stack. Proskauer Rose’s private credit restructuring group is a good one

Blackstone: crab claws, you know the drill. Former partner and GSO founder Dwight Scott is a standout 

Activist Insight: a look at all that happens in the primarily domestic side of activist investing. One to get you caught up is The top 10 wildest campaigns of 2019  

Alpha Exchange: New but shows promise. The first episode hooked me Louis-Vincent Gave, CEO and Founding Partner, Gavekal  

JP Morgan Eye on the Market: Michael Cemblast is razor sharp. It is rather topical and quick, just subscribe.

Capital Allocators: Ted Seides formerly one of the more influential names in early stage fund of funds talks with some of the biggest names in alternatives and more. Whitebox Advisors’s Andy Redleaf is amazing

Inside the Ice House: from ICE / NYSE very broad but worth a listen. John Arnold is the best one I have heard 

Odd Lots: as often as I question some choices of guests Tracy Alloway is fantastic. Bill Janeway on the unicorn bubble 

CFTC Talks: a bit dry but they bring in some hitters and do not mind deep diving at all. A good idea of what to expect is George Saravelos Deutsche Bank, Global Co-head FX Research 

Barstool: not for everyone but I am a Stoolie since year one, a bunch of my friends work there, and they put out some of the funniest stuff on the internet.  I had brutal year and couldn’t have handled it without their levity.

Pardon My Take: Number one podcast for a reason.  Football guys guys. Produced by Scituate’s finest Handsome Hank. If you are one of the few not listening the best of 2019 is a fine dropping off point

Spittin Chiclets: hockey from the standpoint of both fans and former pros. Hosted by my summer neighbor and the originator of gassin’ beers and chuckin’ knucks Ryan Whitney.  Doing another best of cop out

Fore Play: I don’t even play golf (rage and lack of patience) but this pod is so funny and they treat the game with an irreverence that is exactly what it needs. Jake Owens’s story about Phil Mickelson is perfection

Micks Tape: basketball focused but plenty of discussion of sports at large, stand-up comedy, and the only place I find out about new rap.  It is a weird episode but I fell off a treadmill laughing to ‘All Star Draft and Wild Hypotheticals With YP’

Light Camera: where I go for movie reviews and some of the goofiest skits I have ever heard.  I found their second interview with Jesse Eisenberg fascinating

The Corp: a look at entrepreneurs from Alex Rodriguez and Big Cat. Pulls some of the biggest names out there.  Martha Stewart is a personal favorite 

Gambling: it is derivative market making but for sports 

Bet the Process: Rufus Peabody is one of the best football and golf handicappers on the planet. Jeff Ma former captain of the MIT blackjack team is as good at cross discipline analytics as it gets.  Former head of market making at Pinnacle Ted Knutson bridges the finance / gambling bridge well

Pinnacle: gambling through the lens of the most quantitatively advanced sports book out there. In this ep Joe Peta discusses his overlapping careers in hedge funds and gambling

Gamble On: this pod from US Bets focuses on offshore and online gaming. Not a ton of shelf life on these so the latest on Draft Kings going public is worth a listen 

Gaming Today: more of an old school discussion from the standpoint of Vegas bookmakers.  They remind me of floor traders. Listen to the latest and try to find some edge 

Misc.

Daves of Thunder: Feeney and Shek are two tremendously talented comedy writers and they make me laugh ever episode.  I would start pre-hiatus from the top because the jokes get very inside baseball 

Hodinkee: if you have any interest in vintage watches this is really the only place to go.  Ben Clymer’s backstory is what watch collecting is all about

David Chang: insights on the food industry and running a business from a real pro in both regards. Joe Beef is one of my favorite places on earth so that is a good one to check 

Brattlecast: books old and or rare. Ken Gloss owns my favorite shop in Boston and has decades of stories about it.  Finds of a Lifetime is the goal 

Bon Appétit: recipes and trends from the food world in a relaxed and approachable format. Just a delight. They made a perfect Thanksgiving, I stole two recipes and I barely cook

Beyond Yacht Rock: I have learned more about music from this show than in my years of formal training and symphony involvement.  I would take it from the top  but if you need a good cry, JD’s songs from his late wife is a touching tribute

Comedy Bang Bang: if you are in need of a good laugh instead this inside look at comedy is second to none.  I relisten to Paul F. Tompkins as Werner Herzog and every time it kills me

All the Smoke: the newest addition gives a player perspective on the NBA from Stephen Jackson and Matty Barnes.  It made me like Dwayne Wade which as a Celtics fan is tough

If there is anything you think I might enjoy based on these I would be pleased as punch to hear from you.

[junker-town]

7 NBA Draft lottery conspiracies they don’t want you to believe

The truth is out there. I mean here. The truth is right here.

The world is flat. We never landed on the moon. Avril Lavigne died in 2003 and was replaced with a clone. The NBA Draft lottery is rigged. These are a few of the incontrovertible truths about our world, and yet people still keep trying to deny them.

Every year the league consults with the grim specters of the Illuminati to decide whether or not they should rig the draft. Like any competent agency, they don’t play their hand every year — only when it matters. Considering SB Nation is the only sports site not run by the lizard people, we feel uniquely positioned to wake up the world and shine a light on these draft atrocities.

Research is still being conducted by a private group of concerned basketball fans so we can present iron clad proof of impropriety to the United Nations, but for now here’s what we’ve discovered.

NBA Draft lottery conspiracy theories, ranked by how sure we are that they happened.

No. 1 — David Stern rigs the 1985 lottery.

The year is 1985. The first time the NBA decided to hold a draft lottery to determine the No. 1-overall pick. The Felt Forum in New York City is buzzing, the league just secured a new broadcast agreement for the draft with the TBS Superstation, and the Knicks are sitting with the third-worst record in the league.

Everyone knows the Knicks are supposed to get a high pick, but the pressure is still on. The Warriors and Pacers both had worse records, but represent much smaller markets compared to New York. Stern knows the Knicks have to land the No. 1 pick, not only to prove the concept of the NBA Draft lottery and the unpredictability that anything can happen, but ensure that Georgetown standout Patrick Ewing can anchor the Knicks in the NBA’s premier market for the next decade.

In 1985, there was no weighted lottery. Each of the seven worst teams in the NBA was given an equal chance to land the No. 1-overall pick, giving each team just a 14.29 percent chance of being able to pick Ewing. Rather than using a standard lottery ball system as it eventually would, the league put large cards into a tumbler, spun it around and Stern would select one to be the top pick.

It’s here where the NBA’s two-prong plan springs into action. Two separate attempts to rig the lottery, one desired result. Over the years, people have argued for each theory, but it’s our belief that both were done simultaneously to hedge Stern’s bet.

First of all, the Knicks’ envelope was refrigerated, making it cool to the touch. This attempted to make the card stand out amongst the rest, making it easier to select. However, this plan was risky. Under stage lights and with the possibility of time delay, there was a chance the envelope would heat up, rendering the process meaningless.

So, Stern had the help of a secondary source: Jack Wagner, a partner at accounting firm Ernst & Whinney. He placed the envelopes in the drum, and curiously happened to bang one of them on the lip of the vessel — denting the Knicks’ envelope.

Wagner is the real key to all this, because he was the league’s fail safe. If Stern couldn’t select the cold envelope, he’d instead look for a creased corner, knowing this was the Knicks logo.

Need more proof? Ersnt & Whinney were the accounting firm for Gulf and Western Industries. Guess who was a predominant owner of the Knicks in 1985? Gulf and Western Industries, who held a 81 percent stake in The Madison Square Garden Company.

No. 2 — Stern makes up for trading Chris Paul in 2012.

George Shinn is one of the most notorious owners in NBA history. Once the king of the Queen City, Shinn brought the NBA to Charlotte in 1987 after buying the rights to start a franchise, leading to the creation of the Charlotte Hornets. Just over a decade later, he was in the middle of a public trial for kidnapping and sexual assault, which led to the public finding out about Shinn’s extra marital affairs.

Withdrawing from the public, Shinn decided to move the Hornets from Charlotte to New Orleans, a decision some believed was caused by public scrutiny in Charlotte. Despite the Hornets still pulling some of the best attendance figures in the NBA, Shinn found a new home for his team.

Things were decent for the New Orleans Hornets for the better part of a decade. The team had a few playoff berths, hosted an NBA All-Star Game, and, thanks to superstar Chris Paul, looked to anchor the team for its future. Then Shinn expressed his desire to sell the team. A year down the road, and a collapsed deal later, Stern announced the league would purchase the Hornets for $300 million, to ensure its financial solvency and the health of the league as a whole.

The league-owned Hornets decided to trade Paul, after the star demanded a trade out of New Orleans and put the team over a barrel. An initial deal to the Lakers was vetoed by Stern, citing that it wasn’t in the team’s best interests. Four days later, New Orleans agreed to a deal that sent Paul to the Clippers, bolstering the underperforming Los Angeles team and increasing its worth. Meanwhile the Hornets got back a two second-round picks, the Timberwolves’ unprotected first-round, Eric Gordon, Chris Kaman, and Al-Farouq Aminu. It was a potential upside deal for the future, but has aged terribly in retrospect.

By April 2012, the NBA found a buyer for the Hornets when Saints’ owner Tom Benson purchased the team for $338 million. Benson needed a make-good, a superstar to re-launch the team. It was a tough proposition. While bad, there were three teams worse than New Orleans vying for the top pick, with the Charlotte Bobcats holding the worst record in the league, which was also the worst record in NBA history at 7-59.

Everyone knew the No. 1 pick would be Kentucky’s Anthony Davis, a generational athlete with a transcendent unibrow, branding that built itself and would immediately bring star power to whichever team drafted him.

Then, with just a 13.7 percent chance to get the top pick the Hornets somehow wound up with the No. 1 pick, and the ability to draft Davis. The Bobcats got the No. 2 pick. One final twist of the knife for the city that lost its franchise to New Orleans were now robbed of its franchise player.

It’s unclear how Stern pulled off the 2012 heist, but the circumstances are too suspicious and fortuitous to be ignored.

No. 3 — Dikembe Mutombo knows best.

While not a direct conspiracy theory itself, Dikembe Mutombo’s actions prior to the 2016 NBA Draft lottery is stunning proof of the conspiracy the league had been operating in for decades.

The Philadelphia 76ers had the best chance of landing the No. 1 pick on lottery night, but by this point, we’d seen time and time again that “luck” means nothing when it comes to landing the pick. Sure, the Sixers had a 25 percent chance of getting the first pick — but this came after several years of the Cavaliers somehow jumping the worst teams in the league (more on that later).

So, suffice it to say, there was no guarantee the 76ers would pick No. 1 — and yet one guy knew.

Look at that timestamp ... 4:36 p.m. on May 17. Hours before the draft lottery was set to air live on ESPN. Mutombo quickly deleted his tweet, but what happens on the internet lasts forever — and indelible mark of the league’s lottery fixing.

No. 4 — The Cavaliers’ incredible luck.

No team in the NBA has benefited more from the league’s guiding hand than the Cleveland Cavaliers. Drafting LeBron James in 2003 represented more than getting a phenom the entire league coveted, it secured the team’s superstar future for the next 20 years — assuming the Cavaliers drafted right.

In 2011, 2013, and 2014, the Cavaliers unpredictably landed the No. 1 pick in the draft. Over this time, they never had the worst record in the league. All this curiously happened after James made his first “decision” and left for the Miami Heat. Funny how this all works, isn’t it?

Perhaps it was luck, but it was the kind of luck so unpredictable that there had to be an outside hand.

2011: Cavaliers get No. 1 in the lottery thanks to having the Clippers’ pick (2.8 percent chance).

2013: Cavaliers get No. 1 in the lottery (15.6 percent chance).

2014: Cavaliers get No. 1 in the lottery (1.7 percent chance).

The raw odds of this happening is 1,493-1, so improbable it functionally shouldn’t happen. And yet, the Cavaliers kept doing it again, and again, and again. After James left, the Cavaliers were in dire need of a new superstar, and the NBA was there to give them opportunity time, and time, and time again.

In April 2019, the Cavaliers had a 50-50 coin flip against the Suns to determine which team would officially receive the ping-pong combinations for the second-worst record in the NBA. They won, naturally. In a season after James left, this time for Los Angeles.

No. 5 — Ball is lifeline for the Lakers.

At this point, nobody is going to confuse Lonzo Ball with some grand prize worth rigging the lottery over. But this isn’t the story of the UCLA point guard going to Los Angeles — not really. The key players in this conspiracy were then-coach Luke Walton and executive Magic Johnson, both of whom predicted their top-three pick with stunning, Dikembe-esque accuracy.

In a classic case of saying the quiet part loud, Walton appeared on CBS Sports’ We Need to Talk and outlined, straight faced, how the Lakers were going to get their top draft pick to build for the future.

“Magic’s already ensured me that we’re going to get our top three pick this year so I’m excited about that.”

This conversation happened on May 5, 2017. The NBA Draft lottery was held on May 16 — and, just like Johnson promised, the Lakers ended up getting the No. 2 pick in the draft and went on to select Ball.

Yes, the Lakers had a good shot of getting one of the top three picks — but it was far from certain. They entered the lottery with a 46.9 percent chance of picking top three, but that’s not even odds-on, let alone enough for Johnson to “ensure” his coach that the Lakers would get a top-three pick.

Unless he already knew the outcome.

No. 6 — Orlando’s magic.

The year is 1993. The Orlando Magic have just come off as electric a season as anyone could have imagined.

How can a 41-41 year be electric? Shaquille O’Neal. A 20-year-old phenom, O’Neal cruised to rookie of the year honors by posting 23.4 points, 13.9 rebounds, and 3.5 blocks a game, in a season regarded as one of the best rookie years in NBA history.

It took the Magic from cellar-dwellers to barely missing the playoffs thanks to a tiebreaker with the Indiana Pacers. The NBA knew they had a mega star on their hands in O’Neal, and needed to make sure this appointment player could be on as many TV sets as possible the following year.

Enter the 1993 draft lottery. The Magic come to the table with just a 1.52 percent chance of landing the top pick thanks to their 11th-place finish. It’s an awkward year for the Magic to draft. It’s a year of big men, with Michigan’s Chris Webber viewed as the grand prize — but it’s unclear how he could play alongside O’Neal. The Magic need backcourt help, and the Golden State Warriors are in dire need of a big man to pair with Tim Hardaway and Chris Mullin, both of whom missed time with injuries in 1992-93.

The Magic win the lottery (of course) and trade Webber to the Warriors on draft night for Penny Hardaway, and THREE future first-round picks. O’Neal and Hardaway went on to form one of the most exciting tandems of the 1990s, both making multiple NBA All Star Games, and leading the Magic to the playoffs for three straight years, including the NBA Finals in 1994-95.

It all happened because of the NBA and draft lottery night,

No. 7 — The Chicago Bulls land their hometown star in 2008.

The Chicago Bulls weren’t down on their luck by any stretch by the time the 2008 NBA Draft lottery rolled around, but this also presented a unique opportunity for the NBA. The Bulls had languished with two playoff exits and clearly missed one superstar piece to get over the hump. Derrick Rose gave the NBA the opportunity to intervene and solidify the future of a once-proud franchise.

Rose, a Chicago native, had slotted himself as a top pick, along with Michael Beasley and O.J. Mayo. However, as the draft drew near, many believed Rose was going No. 1. The Bulls were in need of an upgrade at point guard from Kirk Hinrich, and this was the chance to kill two birds with one stone from the NBA’s perspective.

Chicago had just a 1.7 percent chance of landing the top pick. It was enough, with the league’s help of course.

[shervonfakhimi]

The Dumpster Fire of a Laker Season

This 2018-19 Lakers season has been a disappointment. A season that glistened with hope and joy has gradually deteriorated into one where watching the clock tick towards its merciful end, whether it be a first round sweep from the two-time defending champion Death Star of a team, the Golden State Warriors, or missing the playoffs outright. This enigma of a team, that has marquee wins over those Warriors (on the road Christmas night), the Houston Rockets (at home), the Oklahoma City Thunder (on the road), the Denver Nuggets (at home), the Portland Trail Blazers (both home and on the road) and Boston Celtics (on the road) has also lost to the hapless and willfully tanking New York Knicks, Cleveland Cavaliers, an Anthony Davis-less Pelicans, Atlanta Hawks and Memphis Grizzlies. They currently, as of this writing, are 3 games back from the 7th and 8th seeds and have the 5th toughest schedule remaining (maybe that’s a good thing since they can only beat good times for some God-forsaken reason). I’m not interested in debating whether or not they’ll end up getting in. Let’s instead talk about how they got here and why the front office deserves to shoulder much of the blame for this debacle of a season.

Like David Ershon in ‘The Other Guys,’ we’ve started at the end, which is the present state of the team. The Lakers are an enigma, inconsistent bunch of young players figuring out how to play along LeBron, but haven’t due to the rash of injuries that have befallen the team, most notably to the prized free agent signing LeBron James, the best player in the league. But it is worth noting how they got there. The Lakers were a hot mess, to put it nicely, pretty much ever since Kobe tore his achilles. Losing persisted. The Lakers laughably lost on multiple free agents. Kobe’s retirement tour was the greatest win/win tank job you could ask for while not making it painfully obvious you were losing games on purpose. The losing netted multiple top 10 picks, which the Lakers used to land Julius Randle (2014, 7th Overall), D’Angelo Russell (2015, 2nd Overall), Brandon Ingram (2016, 2nd Overall) and Lonzo Ball (2017, 2nd Overall). The trainwreck of the Steve Nash trade in 2012 made these picks even more important considering that had either of those 2nd overall picks landed outside of the top 3, the Lakers would’ve lost the pick (they finally lost it in 2018, which the Suns used on Mikal Bridges after hilariously re-trading for it after losing in the Brandon Knight trade in 2015). Some shrewd Lakers trading and drafting allowed them to find contributors in the form of Jordan Clarkson (2014, 46th OVR) Larry Nance Jr. (2015, 27th Overall), Ivica Zubac (2016, 32nd Overall), Kyle Kuzma (2017, 27th Overall), Josh Hart (2017, 30th Overall) and Thomas Bryant (2017, 42nd Overall). All but two of these late find contributors remain, for an assortment of reasons: cap space. After Jim Buss and Mitch Kupchak squandered laughable loads of money in the cap spike of 2016 on Lou Williams, Timofey Mozgov and Luol Deng, the team, predictably struggled. The latter two struggled while stealing money like Biggie in ‘Gimme the Loot’ and the team continue to falter. This was a team that had been irrelevant for at least two seasons, enough to the point where Jeanie Buss fired her own brother and hired Magic Johnson as president of basketball operations and Rob Pelinka as GM. Things were supposed to get better. And they did momentarily.

After getting hired, things looked to get better from the decision makers. Not only did the Lakers have charisma and something to keep them relevant again with a former Laker great running the show, the team made good moves. They traded Lou Williams for what amounted to Josh Hart and Thomas Bryant, a pretty good haul for a rebuilding team. Then, before draft night of 2017 but during the week of, they traded D’Angelo Russell and Timofey Mozgov to Brooklyn for Brook Lopez (and his expiring contract) and the 27th overall pick, which the Lakers used on Kyle Kuzma. While I didn’t like the trade at the time, it was an important trade to make. After the whole Nick Young fiasco, the spotlight on D’Angelo grew immensely. He never was able to properly develop and showcase his skills in Kobe’s farewell tour. Perhaps he could’ve grow to the All Star he is now in Brooklyn, but he needed the change of scenery. He got it, the Lakers got closer the cap space to sign a max free agent, which was their goal. Perhaps there was another way to make it happen, but unlikely with the Lakers not willing to move Brandon Ingram at the time and that they already owed a pick. After trading Larry Nance Jr & Jordan Clarkson in the following trade deadline (for Isaiah Thomas and Channing Frye, both of whom had expiring contracts, and Cleveland’s 1st round pick, which became Moritz Wagner) and Luol Deng giving money back in his buyout which the Lakers used the stretch provision on, that freed enough money to create a second max cap spot without having to trade one of the other key figures of the young core mentioned above. While it sucked to see D’Angelo Russell leave and now flourish (that’s what happens when you epically screw up and can’t afford to wait to move on), these moves were necessary to create the opportunity to sign LeBron and possibly another free agent in the future. This is where shit starts to hit the fan.

ACT I: The Summer of 2018 and the lack of shooting

The Lakers could have signed 2 max free agents this summer. Had the Lakers traded for Paul George from Indiana in the summer of 2017, he likely would’ve re-signed. He’s even said as such. The Lakers chose to bet on him signing in free agency, electing not to mortgage young pieces who can help sustain contending teams, a bet they ended up losing as he re-signed with Oklahoma City, the team that traded for him. The same applies with Kawhi Leonard, who got traded to Toronto and now seems more likely to sign with the Clippers than the Lakers. After signing with LeBron (which after the news dropped I proceeded to scream as if I were in middle school yet again while watching ‘Wedding Crashers.’), the Laker suddenly had over $20 million to spare. Their proceeding moves essentially lit that money on fire like Heath Ledger did as the Joker.

Julius Randle essentially signed a 1+1 with New Orleans for about $8 million per season. Brook Lopez signed a 1 year deal for about $3.5million, the room exception, with the Milwaukee Bucks. The Lakers waived Thomas Bryant to help maximize cap room and he was claimed by the Washington Wizards. The Lakers did not bring in their own players outside of Kentavious Caldwell-Pope. Instead, the front office elected to bring in guys with playoff experience who can ease the playmaking load in Kentavious Caldwell-Pope, Rajon Rondo, JaVale McGee, Lance Stephenson and Michael Beasley. The problem was these signings were incredible redundant. Randle’s scoring, playmaking and ability to switch defensively and Lopez’s newfound 3 point shooting provided skillsets unique to the team that they didn’t have elsewhere. Those two, like Russell, have flourished in their new digs. The Lakers already had guys who can do what those 5 they signed could do. While Pope showed he was a more than capable ‘3&D’ player last season, he has regressed this season. Lance and Rondo have shot well from deep, but the majority of those have been shots defenses have dared them to make, taking away driving lanes or other Laker action. Beasley is an older, lesser version of Kyle Kuzma who didn’t even last the season. To make matters worse, all 4 signings have had a negative impact defensively while on the court. Not only did these guys negatively impact their teams’ defense from the previous year as well, all of Rondo, JaVale, Lance and Beasley had negative net ratings, meaning their teams fared better while they were off the floor (though at least playoff Rondo made a positive impact). So instead of signing their own big men, (Brook Lopez is shooting 36.4% from 3 spacing the floor for MVP candidate Giannis Antetokounmpo; Julius Randle is shooting 35% from 3 and is scoring a career high 20.1 points per game) knock down shooters and/or 3 point gunners (Trevor Ariza, Anthony Tolliver, Seth Curry, Mike Scott, Wayne Ellington, Noah Vonleh, DeMarcus Cousins all signed 1 year deals, which the Lakers prioritized to maintain salary cap space in the summer of 2019, to name a few), the Lakers paired miscasts whose skillsets do not match the complementary skills you need to surround LeBron James and a young core who have shooting concerns of their own. Bear in mind that all year long, rookie 2nd round Isaac Bonga, who has a bright future, has ate a roster spot all season and taken away a roster spot for someone to potentially help the Lakers right now. I don’t about you all, but this sounds like incompetence to me.

Act II: The Chided One

Playing with LeBron is hard. He is the sun everyone around the league, no less his own teammates or coaches, revolve around. It took time and a slow start in Miami with young whipper snapper Erik Spoelstra calling the shots, who LeBron sort of kind of wanted Pat Riley to can and replace with Pat himself. David Blatt lasted just one year in his 2nd stint in Cleveland. So it is important to be on the same page with your coach and your players and your coach and management. But, only 7 games into the season, Magic Johnson took a different approach. He ‘chided’ Luke Walton, as ESPN reported. (Sidenote: Chided is just a funny ass word. You know how hard you have to get verbally roasted to have it be reported as ‘chided?’) This put a ginormous, mostly undeserved spotlight on Luke Walton. Rumors will persist. Altercations and disagreements will take place. Magic Johnson never hired Luke, and any time shifts in front offices take place, more often than not the new regime will want to hire ‘their own.’ While Magic Johnson never hired Luke, he at least owed him patience and understanding. Luke was put in a very difficult spot trying to mix and match this 2 faced team. His rotations were questionable (again, a reason for that being the tricky roster constructed) and has had trouble at times getting his team prepared to play schematically and mentally to take care of teams they should beat. Yet, despite the poor fit and the enhanced spotlight after preaching patience, Luke was doing a good enough job to keep them afloat, as the Lakers were the 4 seed in the West after drubbing the Warriors on Christmas and  a Top 10 team overall.Then the injuries happened….

Act III: Paramedic!

I hate to blame injuries as the majority of the reason why the Lakers have faltered. Denver has been snakebit with injuries all season long, yet have torched the NBA despite it. Indiana lost Victor Oladipo and still have played over .500 ball in his absence. James Harden carried the Rockets through Clint Capela and CP3(to 6 weeks)’s injuries. It’s a little different when it is LeBron James being the one getting injured. The Lakers fell from their aforementioned Top 10 status to a bottom 10 team in LeBron’s absence with an injured groin he sustained against the Warriors on Christmas night. For a team overly reliant on transition offense, they no longer had their safety valve in the halfcourt. The lack of shooting and spacing started to manifest itself even more. The Lakers looked lost.

But it wasn’t just LeBron getting injured. Kyle Kuzma’s effectiveness suffered due to a sore hip. Josh Hart’s 3 point shooting has fell of a cliff due to knee tendinitis. Brandon Ingram has missed 11 games. Rajon Rondo has only played 26 of 60 games. Both of them got suspended early on after throwing hands with Houston. Lonzo Ball rolled his ankle and the Lakers defense disappeared along with him. Chemistry and consistency have been hard to find and sustain, only briefly taking shape in the weeks before the Christmas game. It’s going to become a lot harder to find soon enough.

ACT IV: The Brow

When Anthony Davis signed with Rich Paul, noted LeBron confidante and stout NBA agent for his own agency (Klutch Sports), everyone lost their shit and were convinced he’d end up on the Lakers. Everyone lost their shit once again once LeBron told ESPN it would be ‘amazing’ to play with Davis once he was asked what it would be like if Davis somehow found his way to La La Land. Everyone lost their shit even more than both of those events combined when Anthony Davis’ trade request from New Orleans went public. With Boston (just as big a dumpster fire, by the way!) not being able to trade for Davis due to a CBA quirk where multiple players who sign designated rookie extensions cannot be on the same together (Kyrie Irving signed one previously), this was seen as a power play to get AD to LA, Davis and the Lakers’ best shot at doing so before Boston’s treasure chest of players and picks could become available. The Lakers front office, again, handled it very poorly.

“You let your shit bubble quietly (AND THEN YOU BLOW!).” “Hey keep your cool. The only way to peep a fool is let him show his hand. Then you play your cards.” “Then he through, dealing I understand.” This was Jay-Z showing the game to a young Memphis Bleek in ‘Coming of Age.’ Magic Johnson and Rob Pelinka did not follow this advice. EVERY trade offer became public, whether New Orleans leaked them through Woj or the LA Times got a piece of these offers from the Lakers brass. That is not how trades work in the NBA. There was no word a Tobias Harris trade was even imminent, let alone would occur at 2 AM central time, to the Philadelphia 76ers, no less. The Knicks trade of Kristaps Porzingis to the Dallas Mavericks fell out of the got damn sky. That’s how business is conducted. The Lakers should have seen that the Pelicans were not taking them seriously once Woj reported it would take 4 first round picks, on top of all the Lakers’ young players, for them to even *consider* making a deal. Whether it was their lust to pair Davis with LeBron or making up for not going after Paul George or Kawhi Leonard as hard as the Lakers went for Davis, the Lakers got played. They got played HARD. And it started to affect their play on the court.

Perhaps it is solely no Lonzo as to why the Lakers aren’t defending. Maybe it is because these same Davis rumors tore the locker room apart. The Lakers already had difficulties overlooking poor teams. But consistently losing to teams actively looking to tank to get Zion Williamson signifies something deeper. They aren’t playing *together.* LeBron has resorted to, at times, taking his passive-aggressive Daddy LeBron shots at his younger teammates, when, as mentioned earlier, the veterans have been a bigger issue. From the perspective of the younger players, how couldn’t trade rumors to a new location not affect their play? How do they know they have the full backing of the organization when they know they’re trying to trade you? Why should they go all out just to get swept by the Warriors in the first round of the playoffs? Some of the recent quotes from LeBron haven’t helped bridge the gap. Magic Johnson essentially telling them to ‘grow up’ didn’t help either. For some guys going through their first bout of trade rumors and the ugly nether regions of the business of basketball, shouldn’t there be a little more empathy? Maybe doing so will not just get the young players to play better (Brandon Ingram is lowkey playing some of the best ball of his entire career, averaging 21.1 points, 5.8 rebounds, 3 assists per game on 49.6% shooting from the field and 41.2% from 3. It’s almost like he’s good or something! Wow! Who’d have thought!), but help rally the team to play together and make one last push. That hasn’t happened yet, and the Lakers likely will suffer if it doesn’t happen soon.

Act V: Too Little To Late

At least Magic Johnson and Rob Pelinka made some moves. With the Lakers ranking 27th in the league in 3 point shooting percentage, they finally got shooting to help spread the floor, but once the team was on the outside of the standings looking in. Acquiring Reggie Bullock for (my son) Svi Mykhailiuk and a future 2nd round pick made a lot of sense. Trading Ivica Zubac, who had been by far the Lakers best center this season, and exiling Michael Beasley for Mike Muscala didn’t make as much sense. Especially since, while Muscala is a career 36.4% 3 point shooter, they already had a big man who can shoot from 3 in the form of2018 1st round pick Moe Wagner, who has shot 37.5% from 3. What makes even less sense is acquiescing to demands for minutes from JaVale bleeping McGee (getting roasted by Joakim Noah and Jonas Valanciunas, adding them to a long list of centers who have gotten the best of JaVale McGee this season) as your reason to trade for a stretch 5 when you already have one. Remember when I said the Lakers had Brook Lopez, Julius Randle, Larry Nance Jr., Ivica Zubac and Thomas Bryant all on the same team? None of them are there now. And their frontcourt has routinely been smashed all season long. This move made no sense and has hurt the Lakers in the meantime (it also hasn’t helped that Mike Muscala rolled his ankle in his first game as a Laker). These moves also signified the Lakers realized the moves from the summer haven’t worked out, yet took too long to make a move to make up for it.

And that’s how we got here. A bickering team with a coach that surely seems like a dead man walking that is playing below its expectations of at least making the playoffs after years of rebuilding and missing the playoffs that was playing above those expectations before being decimated by injuries. With 22 games to play, the Lakers currently are tied for 10th place with the Minnesota Timberwolves, who own the tiebreaker with the Lakers after beating them three times. Will they get to the postseason? I don’t think they will, but I hope I’m wrong. LeBron still looks like he’s recuperating from his groin injury. Lonzo’s return does not look like it is coming all that soon. A three game deficit while having to hurdle over three teams is a lot to ask in 22 games. Should they miss on the postseason, Luke will almost surely get canned, and presumptively get the majority of the blame as well. While he garners some blame, he shouldn’t get it all. The majority of it should fall at the hands of Magic Johnson, Rob Pelinka and the front office. And they’re the ones responsible for finding a way to pair another star or superstar alongside LeBron before his contract expires. If this season is any indication, they have a lot of work to do. Or they won’t have their jobs either. Magic Johnson seems to agree.

[flauntpage]

The Outlet Pass: Don't Worry About the Rockets, They Have...Eric Gordon

An Ode to Eric Gordon

I want to talk about Eric Gordon because more people should and not enough do. How many players in the entire league—who have his talent and pedigree—would be happy occupying the intricate space Gordon does, in the collective shadow of James Harden, Chris Paul, Clint Capela, and even P.J. Tucker? The more I watch him this year, the more I appreciate how he feels like the personification of an overlooked albeit crucial cog; a barometer for the Houston Rockets, which also makes him a pivotal character in the narrative of this season.

Fighting through an early-season slump that he’s determined to burn through with the help of his own comically short-term memory, the Houston Rockets need Gordon to be so much more than an accessory from here on out. Pre-Chris Paul, he was James Harden’s right-hand man in a situation that inevitably provided little oxygen for anyone but James Harden. Gordon won the Three-Point Contest, claimed Sixth Man of the Year, and ended his first year in Houston with more threes than everyone except Steph Curry, Klay Thompson, and his own bearded teammate.

Since then, he's comfortably shined outside Harden’s orbit, punishing defenders who want nothing more than a moment to catch their breath after the ball gets swung his way. What they get instead is a mental breakdown. His self-reliance—Gordon has no conscience and knows he’s good enough to get where he wants without a screen—is their worst nightmare. He’s a pugnacious, perma-green light who’s happy to launch a picturesque jumper whenever a defender starts tap dancing at the sight of his jab step (or ducks under a pick 30 feet from the basket).

Gordon's pressure is relentless. He’s a one-man salvo of between-the-leg dribbles that seemingly have no purpose until they magically catapult him into the paint. According to Synergy Sports, the only players who’ve been more efficient on at least 30 isolation plays are Khris Middleton, Bradley Beal, and Kemba Walker. He can hit Capela with a pocket pass and lull defenders into a panic as part of Houston’s devastating Spanish pick-and-roll; every once in a while he tries to end someone’s life by exhibiting a genuinely sneaky athletic burst above the rim.

The Rockets can’t function properly for 48 minutes on either end without Gordon, but they’d especially struggle to master the switch-everything defense he’s built to thrive in. Like, how many guards who do all the stuff Gordon does on offense can also switch onto a bear and not get mauled? His low center of gravity is appreciated, but he also understands how to shrink the floor after that initial switch, so whoever then defends his assignment doesn’t feel like they’re on an island.

Gordon is currently shooting 35.4 percent and the first few weeks of this season featured a four-game stretch in which he launched 67 shots and made only 18 of them, but all in all he might be the single biggest reason I'm not worried about the Rockets. We know his splits will course correct—his True Shooting percentage is 57.5 in the last five games—because his struggle doesn't affect his shot selection. Gordon lives without brakes. He’ll miss a layup on one play and then jack up a quick three the next time down. If it's an airball, he'll take an even deeper shot 15 seconds later. When the defense gives something, he takes it.

Contrast that audaciousness with his expressionless demeanor and what you get is Gordon’s own brand of fortitude, a resiliency that makes you wonder how high his numbers would soar as the first option in Orlando or Brooklyn. When he’s on the floor, Houston’s offense scores 13.6 more points per 100 possessions than when he’s not (from second best to the third-worst offense in the league). Nobody could even attempt to play quite like Gordon does without losing minutes. He's two steps to the left of the spotlight, with a mentality so daring it borders on reckless. Gaudy, stone-faced, and even more threatening outside the parameters of Houston’s system while quintessentially representing what Mike D’Antoni wants it to look like, Gordon is not a perfect player. But watching him steer his skill-set beneath the general NBA fan's radar, on a team that's all in to win it all, is a pleasure to behold.

The Clippers Don’t Shoot Threes (and Couldn’t Care Less)

With the highest winning percentage in a Western Conference that was expected to rip them up, the Los Angeles Clippers are the story of this season. Nobody on their team has ever played in an All-Star game, but their depth, complementary design, youthful exuberance, and two-way tenacity have, so far, eclipsed any questions related to talent. Winning eight of their last nine games—a run that includes victories over the Warriors, Grizzlies, Trail Blazers, Spurs, and Bucks—the Clippers have the sixth-best offense in the league, and are nearly averaging as many points per 100 possessions as they did during Lob City’s heyday. And they’re doing it without the three-point shot.

Last week, I asked Doc Rivers if he wanted to shoot more of them. Here’s what he said: “I’d rather stay in the top ten in offense. You know it’s funny though, really, I think we’re six or five or seven, I don’t know where we’re at, but if we were that and shot a lot of threes I’d say ‘yeah let’s shoot a lot of threes.’ The goal is scoring. It’s not how you score. It’s to score as many points as you can. And we’re doing that. So there are games where we think we should’ve taken more threes, but there are also games where we thought we should take more layups, you know? So we don’t care how it adds up, and that’s what we talk about. If we can get to the 120 number or something like that, I don’t care if they’re ones. Let’s get there as quickly as possible.”

That’s all very fair, and, to a glass-half-full optimist, suggests that L.A. has yet to reach its offensive potential. Quality shots attempted behind the arc are good, and despite ranking 28th in three-point rate, the Clippers are basketball’s most accurate team from the corners; fifth-best from deep, overall.

“That’s something we’re still figuring out, how to get easier threes,” forward Tobias Harris said. “I think we can do a better job of locating them off turnovers on fast breaks, but we’re an ever-improving team. Every night we’re figuring out different things and I think once guys get more into their comfort zone [and let threes] fly, it’ll open up a lot more of the game for us. But it’s something that we do put an emphasis on.”

“We just hoop, bro.”

They’re built to attack in a modern way, with stretch fours (Danilo Gallinari, Mike Scott) and one ascending wing (Harris) representing three of the most lethal spot-up shooters in the league. Others—Lou Williams, Patrick Beverley, Avery Bradley—are way below their career average but still respected enough to open lanes for their teammates, be it Montrezl Harrell rumbling through for a lob or space for Shai Gilgeous-Alexander to penetrate. (The Miami Heat are the only team currently averaging more field goal attempts from drives to the rim.)

There’s also an undeniable “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” vibe surrounding this team. They rank in the bottom five in assist rate, and as the league’s better teams shift away from the pick-and-roll by adopting a more diversified and unpredictable half-court attack, no group runs the pick-and-roll more than the Clippers, per Synergy Sports. They’re anti-style and post-analysis, but so far it all feels sustainable. We’ll see how long it lasts, or if they’ll inevitably need to embrace the arc a bit more than they have. Until then: “I’m gonna be honest with you,” Lou Williams told VICE Sports. “We just hoop, bro.”

Noah Vonleh!

Noah Vonleh is 23 years old, and last week New York Knicks head coach David Fizdale called him “probably, overall our most complete player.” Everything in that sentence is real.

Heading into this season on a contract that still only guarantees him $100,000 before January 10, Vonleh was viewed as a bust—an instant journeyman on his fourth team in five seasons. Before they salary-dumped him onto the Chicago Bulls, the Portland Trail Blazers spent a couple years bouncing Vonleh between spot-starts and a seat at the end of their bench. Nothing stuck. It was a frustrating NBA existence for a promising talent who, as a teenager, was frequently compared to Chris Bosh.

When the Knicks signed Vonleh in July, he was a buy-low, no-risk commodity for a team that's prioritizing the future over the present. So far he's made the most of the opportunity, averaging per-36 minute career highs in points, assists, steals, and blocks. The Knicks are 15 points per 100 possessions better with Vonleh in the game, an absolutely insane number. At worst, he's currently a positive trade asset, someone New York may use to get off a larger contract (like Courtney Lee) before the trade deadline. At best, he's an untapped, young, cheap contributor who's showing the league what New York's player development staff may be capable of. If kept around beyond this season, Vonleh can play two positions, post-up, move his feet, and, theoretically, fit beside Kristaps Porzingis. Athletic big men who rebound, shoot, switch, and protect the rim do not grow on trees.

Of note: His three-point rate tripled from October to November, and for the first time in his career he's making over 40 percent of them (42.1 on just under two tries per game). Vonleh is averaging 10 points, 10.3 rebounds, and 2.7 assists at Madison Square Garden, and has the 32nd-highest Real Plus-Minus in the league, with Mitchell Robinson as the only other Knick in the top 100.

It's still early, and we'll see how Vonleh's impact will be affected if/when he goes through a shooting slump, but so far it's cool to see him find minutes role in a league that was so close to spitting him out. This is an NBA player.

Free Rodney Hood

Rodney Hood is too good for the Cleveland Cavaliers. He doesn’t fit into their short-term goals (i.e. only six teams have a better offense when Hood is on the floor; when he sits only the Chicago Bulls and Atlanta Hawks are worse) and, as a 26-year-old unrestricted free agent this offseason, won’t be onboard the next time they make the playoffs.

His pick-and-roll game is crafty yet stable—Hood hardly ever turns the ball over—and whenever he curls off a screen and draws two defenders the result is usually a simple pass to the open man. Coming off an awkward postseason run that didn’t go as well as he hoped, in the interest of boosting his monetary worth, Hood belongs on a good team, surrounded by good players. (Thanks to his current one-year deal, he can veto any trade the Cavs involve him in, though it behooves him to accept whatever happens.)

The Rockets—a pseudo-contender forever hungry for three-point shooters, iso-creativity, and adjustable defenders—are an obvious suitor. After Hood is eligible to be dealt on December 15th, would Houston attach a protected first-round pick to Marquese Chriss? A Harden, Paul, Hood, Gordon, Tucker lineup would give the Rockets five able three-point threats without sacrificing their switch-everything defensive system—Capela can exist in this group, too—and if the Golden State Warriors are still the only team on their mind, we already know that Hood can be a difference-maker in isolation on the biggest stage.

The fit isn’t perfect: Hood adores the mid-range and has already shot more long twos than the entire Rockets roster this season. He’s isn’t shy about lowering his shoulder into a defender, but still rarely gets to the rim. But in theory, Hood is skilled enough to give them a boost on both ends at an outrageously low cost.

If not Houston, Hood can upgrade just about any situation outside the one he’s currently in. (Would the Philadelphia 76ers part ways with Markelle Fultz for Hood?)

A Three-Headed Sixth Man Race!

This year's Sixth Man award is a subtle microcosm of the league’s bottomless talent pool. At the season's quarter mark, the number of credible candidates is immense. But with apologies to *takes deep breath* Lou Williams, Julius Randle, Spencer Dinwiddie, Dennis Schröder, Terrence Ross, Marcus Morris, Josh Hart, Michael Kidd-Gilchrist, Dwyane Wade, Evan Turner, Shelvin Mack, Jonas Valanciunas, and Patty Mills, three players have separated themselves from the field: Montrezl Harrell, Domas Sabonis, and Derrick Rose.

A walloping punch of adrenaline who turns “the little things” into momentum-shifting uppercuts, Harrell is probably the frontrunner (though I’d vote for Sabonis if the season ended today). He’s wildly efficient on rolls to the rim, protects the paint, and has proven that last year’s production in 16 minutes per game could be extrapolated into a larger role without any drop off. The guy is second in Win Shares per 48 minutes and eighth in PER. He is the NBA's Incredible Hulk. In a word: incredible.

Next is Indiana's backup center. If there ever was a player who showed how detrimental the wrong fit can be for an incoming rookie, look no further than Sabonis's brief, progress-stunting tenure with the Oklahoma City Thunder. Back then, which feels like six million years ago, his daily duties were: 1) Get out of Russell Westbrook’s way, 2) Don’t screw up when Russell Westbrook needs you to get him his tenth assist, 3) Get out of Russell Westbrook’s way.

About a third of all Sabonis’s shots were three pointers, and according to Synergy Sports, he only posted up 94 times in 1,632 minutes, a crime considering how useful he was/is leveraging his size, footwork, and vision on the block. Instead, Sabonis hardly ever drew fouls and lived on the perimeter. Today, he’s attempted five threes in 469 minutes. (A couple weeks ago, Sabonis tapped his chest to apologize for taking—and making—a three. That's incredible.)

He’s one of the five most serviceable passers at his position, an automatic double team with his back to the basket, and someone who functions as a hyper-efficient fulcrum on a Pacers team that plays at a 60-win pace when he’s on the floor. Last month he dunked on Joel Embiid harder than anybody ever has and tried to decapitate Hassan Whiteside later in the same week. There’s unteachable confidence here. A soft touch and dainty footwork spliced with the strength of a musk ox.

Remember when I said Harrell was second in Win Shares per 48 minutes? Sabonis is first. He also leads the league in True Shooting and few are greedier rebounding in traffic. Even though Indy has been fine with Sabonis and Myles Turner both on the floor, the question of whether they can co-exist long-term should and will linger until they succeed/fail in the postseason. Sabonis turns 23 in May and is eligible for an extension next fall. If the Pacers let him become a restricted free agent, some team may (should!) offer even more than the $80 million over four years they just gave Turner. Semi-related: The Pacers are outscoring opponents by 9.5 points per 100 possessions when Sabonis is on the floor without Victor Oladipo, the franchise player. He’s been that good.

Somewhat on the opposite end of the NBA spectrum is Rose, a 30-year-old who nearly washed out of the league. Right now, he’s averaging 19.1 points (his most since the first torn ACL) and 4.5 assists while legitimately boosting a Timberwolves team that desperately wants to make the playoffs. The unprecedented explosion that hurtled him towards an MVP award is no longer accessible in the same way it once was, but in its place is a rhythm jump shot defenders suddenly have to respect.

Rose is shooting 45.2 percent on pull-up threes and 45.9 percent on spot-up threes. Those two numbers are unsustainable, but they'll live on in opposing scouting reports for the rest of the season. Defenders will be less willing to help off Rose, instead doomed to close out hard and run him off the line. Earlier this month, Sacramento Kings head coach Dave Joerger called time to chastise Willie Cauley-Stein after he dropped back and gave Rose a wide-open shot. That would’ve been unthinkable six months ago.

Rose is finally healthy and comfortable, resulting in the successful marriage of a sinister first step with an outside shot. For that alone, if he doesn’t win Sixth Man he should be in the conversation for Most Improved Player. It’s opened up driving lanes for himself and teammates—Minnesota has a top-five offense with Rose and produce at a bottom-two rate without him—while forcing opponents to acknowledge the myriad ways he can attack in the open floor.

According to Synergy Sports, Rose is averaging 1.25 points per possession as the ball-handler in transition, which, given his volume, is an excellent mark rivaled by two or three players in the entire league. (He’s scored more transition points than Kemba Walker, Kyle Lowry, James Harden, and Damian Lillard.)

A lot can happen between now and April, but be surprised if neither Harrell, Sabonis, nor Rose is named Sixth Man of the Year. They've been dominant in their role.

Orlando's Science Experiment

Maybe it’s because I’m a weirdo (spoiler: yes), but few occasions from this NBA season hype me up more than whenever Jonathan Isaac and Mo Bamba share the court. To be clear, there is no rational reason to feel this way. The basketball is typically atrocious, chaotic, and disheveled. But every so often, like the Loch Ness monster emerging from a fog-topped lake, a rare glimpse of what can one day be Orlando’s norm rises into view.

Steve Clifford's defensive principles are simple. He wants his bigs to stay in the paint and let his guards and wings chase shooters up top, usually over screens in an attempt to take away the shot and funnel them towards waiting rim protection. The previous three seasons, the Magic finished 24th, 22nd, and 25th in the percentage of opposing shots that came at the rim. This year they're sixth. When Isaac and Bamba are the two primary defenders involved, whoever's up against them can feel their brain melt into ice cream.

Orlando's lineups that feature those two have been bad, but that's not 100 percent their fault. Most of the minutes come at the start of the second and fourth quarters, when they're joined by other reserves (like Jerian Grant or Jonathon Simmons) who make little sense supporting them on offense. When Evan Fournier and Terrence Ross are in, though, Orlando can breathe a bit more with the ball. Sometimes that's because Bamba and Isaac are good enough shooters to invert the floor and create space for those guys to maneuver in the paint.

Here they are both hanging above the arc, bringing their own big defenders with them:

Separating the two, Isaac has already flashed the chops of someone who should appear on multiple All-Defensive teams. The speed (in his feet and hands), length, and intuitive feel are locked in place—to beat him off the dribble is to evade one’s own shadow—but the 21-year-old isn’t muscular enough to stand up the league’s more brutish scorers. That's fine right now. He'll grow. Until then, at 6'10" with a 7'1" wingspan, Isaac is good enough on the perimeter to reach in, get crossed over, then recover back to smother his man from behind. As a help defender, Isaac tends to chase the ball a bit too much, but that tendency should iron itself out as he matures.

Bamba is a supernatural beanstalk who plants himself in the paint, then tries to use his uncanny physical dimensions to race out and contest along the perimeter whenever his man is about to line up a three. (He's usually a step too slow.) Bamba's physical dimensions are unprecedented, but can’t mask the learning curve he'll eventually need to master if he wants to become a great all-around anchor. Together, he and Isaac are still feeling their way through the league, but it’s a thrill to daydream about what they may become. I mean, just imagine you're Kyle Kuzma on this play:

De’Aaron Has the Eyes of a Fox

I used to think nothing in life was perfect, and then I saw this pass.

The Outlet Pass: Don't Worry About the Rockets, They Have...Eric Gordon published first on https://footballhighlightseurope.tumblr.com/

[leehaws]

The Outlet Pass: Don’t Worry About the Rockets, They Have…Eric Gordon

An Ode to Eric Gordon

I want to talk about Eric Gordon because more people should and not enough do. How many players in the entire league—who have his talent and pedigree—would be happy occupying the intricate space Gordon does, in the collective shadow of James Harden, Chris Paul, Clint Capela, and even P.J. Tucker? The more I watch him this year, the more I appreciate how he feels like the personification of an overlooked albeit crucial cog; a barometer for the Houston Rockets, which also makes him a pivotal character in the narrative of this season.

Fighting through an early-season slump that he’s determined to burn through with the help of his own comically short-term memory, the Houston Rockets need Gordon to be so much more than an accessory from here on out. Pre-Chris Paul, he was James Harden’s right-hand man in a situation that inevitably provided little oxygen for anyone but James Harden. Gordon won the Three-Point Contest, claimed Sixth Man of the Year, and ended his first year in Houston with more threes than everyone except Steph Curry, Klay Thompson, and his own bearded teammate.

Since then, he’s comfortably shined outside Harden’s orbit, punishing defenders who want nothing more than a moment to catch their breath after the ball gets swung his way. What they get instead is a mental breakdown. His self-reliance—Gordon has no conscience and knows he’s good enough to get where he wants without a screen—is their worst nightmare. He’s a pugnacious, perma-green light who’s happy to launch a picturesque jumper whenever a defender starts tap dancing at the sight of his jab step (or ducks under a pick 30 feet from the basket).

Gordon’s pressure is relentless. He’s a one-man salvo of between-the-leg dribbles that seemingly have no purpose until they magically catapult him into the paint. According to Synergy Sports, the only players who’ve been more efficient on at least 30 isolation plays are Khris Middleton, Bradley Beal, and Kemba Walker. He can hit Capela with a pocket pass and lull defenders into a panic as part of Houston’s devastating Spanish pick-and-roll; every once in a while he tries to end someone’s life by exhibiting a genuinely sneaky athletic burst above the rim.

The Rockets can’t function properly for 48 minutes on either end without Gordon, but they’d especially struggle to master the switch-everything defense he’s built to thrive in. Like, how many guards who do all the stuff Gordon does on offense can also switch onto a bear and not get mauled? His low center of gravity is appreciated, but he also understands how to shrink the floor after that initial switch, so whoever then defends his assignment doesn’t feel like they’re on an island.

Gordon is currently shooting 35.4 percent and the first few weeks of this season featured a four-game stretch in which he launched 67 shots and made only 18 of them, but all in all he might be the single biggest reason I’m not worried about the Rockets. We know his splits will course correct—his True Shooting percentage is 57.5 in the last five games—because his struggle doesn’t affect his shot selection. Gordon lives without brakes. He’ll miss a layup on one play and then jack up a quick three the next time down. If it’s an airball, he’ll take an even deeper shot 15 seconds later. When the defense gives something, he takes it.

Contrast that audaciousness with his expressionless demeanor and what you get is Gordon’s own brand of fortitude, a resiliency that makes you wonder how high his numbers would soar as the first option in Orlando or Brooklyn. When he’s on the floor, Houston’s offense scores 13.6 more points per 100 possessions than when he’s not (from second best to the third-worst offense in the league). Nobody could even attempt to play quite like Gordon does without losing minutes. He’s two steps to the left of the spotlight, with a mentality so daring it borders on reckless. Gaudy, stone-faced, and even more threatening outside the parameters of Houston’s system while quintessentially representing what Mike D’Antoni wants it to look like, Gordon is not a perfect player. But watching him steer his skill-set beneath the general NBA fan’s radar, on a team that’s all in to win it all, is a pleasure to behold.

The Clippers Don’t Shoot Threes (and Couldn’t Care Less)

With the highest winning percentage in a Western Conference that was expected to rip them up, the Los Angeles Clippers are the story of this season. Nobody on their team has ever played in an All-Star game, but their depth, complementary design, youthful exuberance, and two-way tenacity have, so far, eclipsed any questions related to talent. Winning eight of their last nine games—a run that includes victories over the Warriors, Grizzlies, Trail Blazers, Spurs, and Bucks—the Clippers have the sixth-best offense in the league, and are nearly averaging as many points per 100 possessions as they did during Lob City’s heyday. And they’re doing it without the three-point shot.

Last week, I asked Doc Rivers if he wanted to shoot more of them. Here’s what he said: “I’d rather stay in the top ten in offense. You know it’s funny though, really, I think we’re six or five or seven, I don’t know where we’re at, but if we were that and shot a lot of threes I’d say ‘yeah let’s shoot a lot of threes.’ The goal is scoring. It’s not how you score. It’s to score as many points as you can. And we’re doing that. So there are games where we think we should’ve taken more threes, but there are also games where we thought we should take more layups, you know? So we don’t care how it adds up, and that’s what we talk about. If we can get to the 120 number or something like that, I don’t care if they’re ones. Let’s get there as quickly as possible.”

That’s all very fair, and, to a glass-half-full optimist, suggests that L.A. has yet to reach its offensive potential. Quality shots attempted behind the arc are good, and despite ranking 28th in three-point rate, the Clippers are basketball’s most accurate team from the corners; fifth-best from deep, overall.

“That’s something we’re still figuring out, how to get easier threes,” forward Tobias Harris said. “I think we can do a better job of locating them off turnovers on fast breaks, but we’re an ever-improving team. Every night we’re figuring out different things and I think once guys get more into their comfort zone [and let threes] fly, it’ll open up a lot more of the game for us. But it’s something that we do put an emphasis on.”

“We just hoop, bro.”

They’re built to attack in a modern way, with stretch fours (Danilo Gallinari, Mike Scott) and one ascending wing (Harris) representing three of the most lethal spot-up shooters in the league. Others—Lou Williams, Patrick Beverley, Avery Bradley—are way below their career average but still respected enough to open lanes for their teammates, be it Montrezl Harrell rumbling through for a lob or space for Shai Gilgeous-Alexander to penetrate. (The Miami Heat are the only team currently averaging more field goal attempts from drives to the rim.)

There’s also an undeniable “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” vibe surrounding this team. They rank in the bottom five in assist rate, and as the league’s better teams shift away from the pick-and-roll by adopting a more diversified and unpredictable half-court attack, no group runs the pick-and-roll more than the Clippers, per Synergy Sports. They’re anti-style and post-analysis, but so far it all feels sustainable. We’ll see how long it lasts, or if they’ll inevitably need to embrace the arc a bit more than they have. Until then: “I’m gonna be honest with you,” Lou Williams told VICE Sports. “We just hoop, bro.”

Noah Vonleh!

Noah Vonleh is 23 years old, and last week New York Knicks head coach David Fizdale called him “probably, overall our most complete player.” Everything in that sentence is real.

Heading into this season on a contract that still only guarantees him $100,000 before January 10, Vonleh was viewed as a bust—an instant journeyman on his fourth team in five seasons. Before they salary-dumped him onto the Chicago Bulls, the Portland Trail Blazers spent a couple years bouncing Vonleh between spot-starts and a seat at the end of their bench. Nothing stuck. It was a frustrating NBA existence for a promising talent who, as a teenager, was frequently compared to Chris Bosh.

When the Knicks signed Vonleh in July, he was a buy-low, no-risk commodity for a team that’s prioritizing the future over the present. So far he’s made the most of the opportunity, averaging per-36 minute career highs in points, assists, steals, and blocks. The Knicks are 15 points per 100 possessions better with Vonleh in the game, an absolutely insane number. At worst, he’s currently a positive trade asset, someone New York may use to get off a larger contract (like Courtney Lee) before the trade deadline. At best, he’s an untapped, young, cheap contributor who’s showing the league what New York’s player development staff may be capable of. If kept around beyond this season, Vonleh can play two positions, post-up, move his feet, and, theoretically, fit beside Kristaps Porzingis. Athletic big men who rebound, shoot, switch, and protect the rim do not grow on trees.

Of note: His three-point rate tripled from October to November, and for the first time in his career he’s making over 40 percent of them (42.1 on just under two tries per game). Vonleh is averaging 10 points, 10.3 rebounds, and 2.7 assists at Madison Square Garden, and has the 32nd-highest Real Plus-Minus in the league, with Mitchell Robinson as the only other Knick in the top 100.

It’s still early, and we’ll see how Vonleh’s impact will be affected if/when he goes through a shooting slump, but so far it’s cool to see him find minutes role in a league that was so close to spitting him out. This is an NBA player.

Free Rodney Hood

Rodney Hood is too good for the Cleveland Cavaliers. He doesn’t fit into their short-term goals (i.e. only six teams have a better offense when Hood is on the floor; when he sits only the Chicago Bulls and Atlanta Hawks are worse) and, as a 26-year-old unrestricted free agent this offseason, won’t be onboard the next time they make the playoffs.

His pick-and-roll game is crafty yet stable—Hood hardly ever turns the ball over—and whenever he curls off a screen and draws two defenders the result is usually a simple pass to the open man. Coming off an awkward postseason run that didn’t go as well as he hoped, in the interest of boosting his monetary worth, Hood belongs on a good team, surrounded by good players. (Thanks to his current one-year deal, he can veto any trade the Cavs involve him in, though it behooves him to accept whatever happens.)

The Rockets—a pseudo-contender forever hungry for three-point shooters, iso-creativity, and adjustable defenders—are an obvious suitor. After Hood is eligible to be dealt on December 15th, would Houston attach a protected first-round pick to Marquese Chriss? A Harden, Paul, Hood, Gordon, Tucker lineup would give the Rockets five able three-point threats without sacrificing their switch-everything defensive system—Capela can exist in this group, too—and if the Golden State Warriors are still the only team on their mind, we already know that Hood can be a difference-maker in isolation on the biggest stage.

https://oembed.vice.com/i7tPwsS?media=0&app=1

The fit isn’t perfect: Hood adores the mid-range and has already shot more long twos than the entire Rockets roster this season. He’s isn’t shy about lowering his shoulder into a defender, but still rarely gets to the rim. But in theory, Hood is skilled enough to give them a boost on both ends at an outrageously low cost.

If not Houston, Hood can upgrade just about any situation outside the one he’s currently in. (Would the Philadelphia 76ers part ways with Markelle Fultz for Hood?)

A Three-Headed Sixth Man Race!

This year’s Sixth Man award is a subtle microcosm of the league’s bottomless talent pool. At the season’s quarter mark, the number of credible candidates is immense. But with apologies to *takes deep breath* Lou Williams, Julius Randle, Spencer Dinwiddie, Dennis Schröder, Terrence Ross, Marcus Morris, Josh Hart, Michael Kidd-Gilchrist, Dwyane Wade, Evan Turner, Shelvin Mack, Jonas Valanciunas, and Patty Mills, three players have separated themselves from the field: Montrezl Harrell, Domas Sabonis, and Derrick Rose.

A walloping punch of adrenaline who turns “the little things” into momentum-shifting uppercuts, Harrell is probably the frontrunner (though I’d vote for Sabonis if the season ended today). He’s wildly efficient on rolls to the rim, protects the paint, and has proven that last year’s production in 16 minutes per game could be extrapolated into a larger role without any drop off. The guy is second in Win Shares per 48 minutes and eighth in PER. He is the NBA’s Incredible Hulk. In a word: incredible.

Next is Indiana’s backup center. If there ever was a player who showed how detrimental the wrong fit can be for an incoming rookie, look no further than Sabonis’s brief, progress-stunting tenure with the Oklahoma City Thunder. Back then, which feels like six million years ago, his daily duties were: 1) Get out of Russell Westbrook’s way, 2) Don’t screw up when Russell Westbrook needs you to get him his tenth assist, 3) Get out of Russell Westbrook’s way.

About a third of all Sabonis’s shots were three pointers, and according to Synergy Sports, he only posted up 94 times in 1,632 minutes, a crime considering how useful he was/is leveraging his size, footwork, and vision on the block. Instead, Sabonis hardly ever drew fouls and lived on the perimeter. Today, he’s attempted five threes in 469 minutes. (A couple weeks ago, Sabonis tapped his chest to apologize for taking—and making—a three. That’s incredible.)

He’s one of the five most serviceable passers at his position, an automatic double team with his back to the basket, and someone who functions as a hyper-efficient fulcrum on a Pacers team that plays at a 60-win pace when he’s on the floor. Last month he dunked on Joel Embiid harder than anybody ever has and tried to decapitate Hassan Whiteside later in the same week. There’s unteachable confidence here. A soft touch and dainty footwork spliced with the strength of a musk ox.

Remember when I said Harrell was second in Win Shares per 48 minutes? Sabonis is first. He also leads the league in True Shooting and few are greedier rebounding in traffic. Even though Indy has been fine with Sabonis and Myles Turner both on the floor, the question of whether they can co-exist long-term should and will linger until they succeed/fail in the postseason. Sabonis turns 23 in May and is eligible for an extension next fall. If the Pacers let him become a restricted free agent, some team may (should!) offer even more than the $80 million over four years they just gave Turner. Semi-related: The Pacers are outscoring opponents by 9.5 points per 100 possessions when Sabonis is on the floor without Victor Oladipo, the franchise player. He’s been that good.

Somewhat on the opposite end of the NBA spectrum is Rose, a 30-year-old who nearly washed out of the league. Right now, he’s averaging 19.1 points (his most since the first torn ACL) and 4.5 assists while legitimately boosting a Timberwolves team that desperately wants to make the playoffs. The unprecedented explosion that hurtled him towards an MVP award is no longer accessible in the same way it once was, but in its place is a rhythm jump shot defenders suddenly have to respect.

Rose is shooting 45.2 percent on pull-up threes and 45.9 percent on spot-up threes. Those two numbers are unsustainable, but they’ll live on in opposing scouting reports for the rest of the season. Defenders will be less willing to help off Rose, instead doomed to close out hard and run him off the line. Earlier this month, Sacramento Kings head coach Dave Joerger called time to chastise Willie Cauley-Stein after he dropped back and gave Rose a wide-open shot. That would’ve been unthinkable six months ago.

Rose is finally healthy and comfortable, resulting in the successful marriage of a sinister first step with an outside shot. For that alone, if he doesn’t win Sixth Man he should be in the conversation for Most Improved Player. It’s opened up driving lanes for himself and teammates—Minnesota has a top-five offense with Rose and produce at a bottom-two rate without him—while forcing opponents to acknowledge the myriad ways he can attack in the open floor.

According to Synergy Sports, Rose is averaging 1.25 points per possession as the ball-handler in transition, which, given his volume, is an excellent mark rivaled by two or three players in the entire league. (He’s scored more transition points than Kemba Walker, Kyle Lowry, James Harden, and Damian Lillard.)

A lot can happen between now and April, but be surprised if neither Harrell, Sabonis, nor Rose is named Sixth Man of the Year. They’ve been dominant in their role.

Orlando’s Science Experiment

Maybe it’s because I’m a weirdo (spoiler: yes), but few occasions from this NBA season hype me up more than whenever Jonathan Isaac and Mo Bamba share the court. To be clear, there is no rational reason to feel this way. The basketball is typically atrocious, chaotic, and disheveled. But every so often, like the Loch Ness monster emerging from a fog-topped lake, a rare glimpse of what can one day be Orlando’s norm rises into view.

Steve Clifford’s defensive principles are simple. He wants his bigs to stay in the paint and let his guards and wings chase shooters up top, usually over screens in an attempt to take away the shot and funnel them towards waiting rim protection. The previous three seasons, the Magic finished 24th, 22nd, and 25th in the percentage of opposing shots that came at the rim. This year they’re sixth. When Isaac and Bamba are the two primary defenders involved, whoever’s up against them can feel their brain melt into ice cream.

Orlando’s lineups that feature those two have been bad, but that’s not 100 percent their fault. Most of the minutes come at the start of the second and fourth quarters, when they’re joined by other reserves (like Jerian Grant or Jonathon Simmons) who make little sense supporting them on offense. When Evan Fournier and Terrence Ross are in, though, Orlando can breathe a bit more with the ball. Sometimes that’s because Bamba and Isaac are good enough shooters to invert the floor and create space for those guys to maneuver in the paint.

Here they are both hanging above the arc, bringing their own big defenders with them:

Separating the two, Isaac has already flashed the chops of someone who should appear on multiple All-Defensive teams. The speed (in his feet and hands), length, and intuitive feel are locked in place—to beat him off the dribble is to evade one’s own shadow—but the 21-year-old isn’t muscular enough to stand up the league’s more brutish scorers. That’s fine right now. He’ll grow. Until then, at 6’10” with a 7’1″ wingspan, Isaac is good enough on the perimeter to reach in, get crossed over, then recover back to smother his man from behind. As a help defender, Isaac tends to chase the ball a bit too much, but that tendency should iron itself out as he matures.

Bamba is a supernatural beanstalk who plants himself in the paint, then tries to use his uncanny physical dimensions to race out and contest along the perimeter whenever his man is about to line up a three. (He’s usually a step too slow.) Bamba’s physical dimensions are unprecedented, but can’t mask the learning curve he’ll eventually need to master if he wants to become a great all-around anchor. Together, he and Isaac are still feeling their way through the league, but it’s a thrill to daydream about what they may become. I mean, just imagine you’re Kyle Kuzma on this play:

De’Aaron Has the Eyes of a Fox

I used to think nothing in life was perfect, and then I saw this pass.

The Outlet Pass: Don’t Worry About the Rockets, They Have…Eric Gordon syndicated from https://justinbetreviews.wordpress.com/

[doubledrivel-blog]

11. Chinese Big Baller Bail - Awful NBA Officiating - Not Much Hornets Buzz - Eric Bledsoe Gets out of Phoenix

Greg:  Hello and welcome to another episode of Double Drivel. We are a weekly podcast offering a fan's perspective on the news and issues surrounding the NBA. Thank you for joining us. My name is Greg and I am joined as always by my co-host JT. You can find us on Twitter @doubledrivelers or email us at [email protected]. JT what up my friend?

JT: Hey Greg, not too much at all. Hanging in there, watching basketball, living life, playing a little at the old local Y

Greg: Getting down?

JT: I played today. A lot of elbows being thrown there Greg. They're dirty elbows. We had a good time. That's how they do it down there.

Greg: We got some great stories this week. Harden goes for 56 on the Jazz, I know you like that story. Eric Bledsoe is going to the Bucks. We’ll start with some piss-poor officiating. What is going on in Oklahoma City?

JT: Can I be so bold as to say they're being targeted?

Greg: I don't know if you can say they're being targeted. They have some aggressive offensive players. They are high profile players. They draw more eyes on them to begin with, but both Carmelo and Westbrook got the shit end of lousy calls in the past few days.

JT:As bad as the Westbrook one was I think Carmelo's ejection was worse.

Greg: Will you please go through the tale of why Carmelo got ejected on an offensive play?

JT:  They were playing the Blazers. It was confusing to watch because Melo comes with a double clutch layup kind of like leaping, in and it goes in. It looked like he drew contact. He’s getting ready to take his free-throw shot, and they chose to give the play a review real quick. They were like yeah, we're gonna eject you instead. Here's a quote from the dumb zebra, “We deemed that the contact was excessive and not a natural basketball move whereas he is seeking out near catch that hitting him in the face with an elbow and then goes back to the basket and scores.” This seems like a lot of thinking in the air from this take, if you ask me. Jump off the ground, look around, bop this guy in the face with an elbow, then turn around and go back to playing basketball, all while your feet are off the ground.

Greg: It's possible, it just seems pretty calculated. He went from making a great basketball move to getting called.

JT: Loving it my man. Hit a great shot. A very Carmelo shot. That is a very characteristic shot for him to take. That's how he drives and takes laps. That's how a lot of players in the NBA go to the hole and make some off-balance shots with limbs flying.

Greg: The funny thing is when you raise your arms they're about the height of heads, and it's the damnedest thing, things the same height might occasionally hit into each other. He goes, makes a great move, gets the call with the n1, and 'm not gonna say mysteriously, they reviewed the play. They did go over and review it and they came back with a crazy explanation. Who wrote that? Who even said that and can take themselves seriously? He drove to the basket and took a shot, there was nothing more than that. I didn't see any bad intentions on those elbows. I didn't see any anything to that effect.

JT: That's just the wrong call. After the game they asked Melo if he wanted to say anything about it, and he said I don't have anything to say about that play. I think the league will do what's right. He’s taking the high road. Is that what Carmelo Anthony is known for?

Greg: Poor officiating there, and nobody likes that. The next night Russell Westbrook goes to one of his well known spots on the court. Russell Westbrook plays. He won

MVP last year, he's Russell Westbrook. For him to get called on this kind of offensive shot, where he stopped and was looking for contact? This was not a malicious intent of any sort. He went from getting what should have been a one and done,  to a flagrant one.

JT: That's absolutely insane. Come on guys. I thought on this play. They were playing the Kings. We're talking about bottom boy on offense Greg. Another Eastern European guy. Westbrook took a jump shot, and I thought they were gonna call him for kicking his feet out. It looked like he did maybe a little bit. Still not enough to be called in my opinion. They got him for a follow through. An unnatural follow-through. He smacked Boyd, son a bitch, in the face top to bottom style. Three Stooges style. He sold it. He flopped. This fucker, he played his part to get the reaction.

Greg: In the previous, story oddly enough, it was also a fellow Eastern European with  Bogdanovich.

JT: Here's the thing about Eastern Europeans, they're very tough. Arguably the  greatest heavyweight cage fighter of all time, Fedor Emelianenko, is Eastern European. He's

a legend. Another championship boxer, Yvonne Drago from Russia. He’s very much a champion. These guys are tough, they don't need to be flopping. They don't need to be doing this. They don't endear themselves to any of the other fans in the league by playing that way.

Greg: Eric Bledsoe whined and successfully got his trade. He was the one who famously went on Twitter and said, “I don't want to be here.” He said was talking about a hair salon and hilarity ensued. The Twitter pictures, the jokes, the everything. It was all fun and games, but he got his way. He's going to a better team. He's going to a team that's on the rise. They’ve got some great players to play with now, and I hate this. How do you feel?

JT:  It's rewarding bad behavior. He basically decided he didn't want to be there. He tweets I don't want to be here. The league find him $10,000 for that. Two weeks later he's traded and gone. Ten thousand dollars well spent. Ten thousand dollars! What does that mean? This definitely makes the Bucs a better team Greg. I don't know anything about Monroe, but they got a draft pick to the Suns.

Greg: I hope Bledsoe doesn't ruin what seems to be a pretty cool thing going on in in Milwaukee.

JT:  If it was three or four years ago I might have wanted Greg Monroe, but I can't imagine wanting him now. He's just taking the spot and probably some money for the trade. When Kyrie Irving successfully got traded that “we don't like this, and this is not this,” I don't think a lot of people like that. It's gross.

Greg: The NBA is lucky enough to have guaranteed contracts. The NFL would kill for guaranteed contracts. If they're gonna get all the money the NBA  should at least play all

the time, that's just fair. If they want to get traded or something that's business. Refusing to play is garbage. It is just not cool.

Something that you're very passionate about, the Utah Jazz got a spanking from the beard, James Harden. The other day he scored 56 points. It didn't look like he could miss. I know you intently watched him hit every shot. What do you think of that game?

JT: Things aren't great in Utah Gregg. The defense is okay, but it hasn't been phenomenal. Harden couldn't fucking miss. He had 22 points in the first quarter. He knew it was gonna be a long night after that.

Greg: You texted me when he had 22 in the first. I knew you weren't gonna have a good night I don't even know if I replied, I just knew it was gonna beone of those nights.

JT: He tried some different things, but he ended up with 56. The Jazz lost by a lot.

Greg: That's why Harden is consistent MVP candidate. He can put up big numbers like that.

JT: I don't care for his style of play either. I don't think that Chris Paul is going to make that much of a difference either. The first game they played together, it not only didn't look like it was working that night, but a lot of people said what is the real plan? It's gonna be great to have two good players.

JT: It never hurts, but it's too similar in the position. It's not gonna work, especially because Harden’s getting used to scoring all these points. He's playing exactly how he was playing last year. He's just continuing.

Greg: Is Chris Paul gonna hinder that at all?

JT: I know you don't agree, but I think Chris Paul is gonna be in a backup kind of position. They will let Harden either start, and play the point guard, or Chris Paul's gonna come off the bench

and lead a second. He's slowed down a little bit. He's smart enough to know if Harden can put up these kind of numbers, you don't want to interfere with that. You want to like see where you can complement him. That's gonna be when he needs a break.

Greg:  It doesn't seem like they need to help scoring points. They could use his other talents with the assists or going in for the rebound.

JT: Chris Paul, he's got respect. My man goes in for a guard rebound. Not really in there, but he's definitely going for it better than some guys.

Greg:  He's scrappy. JT what is with the Celtics? I am a Celtics hater. I don't like anything about Boston. I feel dirty that I even felt any sort of pity for Tom Brady when deflate gate was going on, because that was a sham. I hate Boston and that was a sham. I don't care for Boston at all, football, basketball, hockey-

JT: None of it?

Greg:  Well baseball, let's not forget baseball. The Red Sox, hate them, but they're playing pretty well. I am NOT a Kyrie Irving fan, especially how he got there. They had to trade away three starters from last year to get Kyrie Irving, and four other moves in the offseason. They also lost a guy they only had for a couple minutes. Pretty crazy that they are still playing this well. How great would they be if they had the great Gordon Hayward as well?

JT: Do they even need him? They won nine in a row. They look fantastic. Kyrie looks incredible. Do they need Hayward? They had to have him? It's not like he's gonna go anywhere, but they look really good. It looks like Boston made the right deal. Shipping out Isaiah Thomas, J Crowder, and Avery Bradley for Frick.

Greg: Brad Stevens is a good coach, which Kyrie has never had.

JT: You're always on his nuts. You say you hate Boston, but you're always on Steven’s nuts.

Greg:  Look at the guy. Who did he have last year for them to be playing as well as they have? Even the year before that they played pretty well. When you see that guy in the huddle, he gives a shit. There's a lot of the coaches like the Hornets coach. That guy's trying, and that's all I wanted, a little bit of effort. I also liked that guy when he was a college coach. He made it to the tournament one year. They played great when he was at Butler. He was just as big of a star as the kids were. He seemed like a good coach then, and it if the guy can get some little crap school into the tournament and get them very far in college, and he does very well with the professionals, then there's a common denominator there. It's him being a good coach.

JT:  You love him, and you love your man on the Sixers, JJ Reddick. They're both very handsome players Greg.

Greg: You couldn't get me to say a bad thing about JJ Redick. I don't really care how he looks.

JT: His hair's a little shorter this season. Do you like it better this way?

Greg: It doesn't really bother me one way or the other. I'm good on that. The Celtics play the Lakers tonight. If they win it'll be ten in a row.

JT: Kyrie Irving is gonna fucking smoke Lonzo Ball Greg. He's gonna smoke him dirty all night long.

Greg: He might. He doesn't play defense well though. Neither one of them are great on D. In

unrelated news, how could we even talk about Lonzo Ball without talking about his brother

shoplifting in China? Did you see this story?

JT: He has two little brothers. This is the youngest one right?

Greg: This is the one that's on UCLA. There's another one that's still in high school.

JT:  He and a couple other players from UCLA were on a trip to China, and they decided to steal some sunglasses. They were just released on bail. It's one thing to go somewhere and act up a

little bit but, you're gonna steal in a country like China? That that seems crazy. That seems like you think you're bigger than any problems, or any consequences. That's madness. To make it even worse their father came, and they're currently a reality show.

Greg: Of course.

JT: He's there with the camera crew for this whole thing.

Greg: The show is going to be called Ball in the family.

JT: This all turned into petty theft in China Gregg. For petty theft in China you get thrown in jail. I'm terrified of international prisons. I'm scared of jail in general, but the idea of being in jail or prison abroad is-

Greg: They had that show locked up abroad, remember?

JT: No, what's that?

Greg: People would tell their stories. Guys would go in Venezuelan prison, or there would be somebody who had been there on vacation, did something stupid like this, and ended up in prison. There's all different people with stories every week. There were horrible terrible stories of international prisons. It’s not like any prisons good, but I don't want to be in some Chinese prison, I'll tell you that right now.

JT: There was that movie from the mid-90s,Claire Dane's travelling abroad, and some dude slips drugs and herb in her carry-on bag Greg. Next thing you know she's in a fucking wooden cage in some Thai prison. No one can get her out. That shit's scary. I don't want that. Do you remember when we were in middle school, and  that guy got caned?

Greg: I believe it was in Singapore.

JT: He stuck gum or something somewhere, or threw it on the sidewalk or something. My fifth grade teacher made a point to tell us they moisten the cane so it can wrap around the body when they hit you with it. He was quite a fella. The strikes Gregg, they're administered by a martial arts expert. He also taught us-

Greg:  In fifth grade you learned that huh?

JT: Yeah, maybe too young for that. Maybe a colorful fella.

Greg: We'll leave it there.

JT: Dwight Howard Gregg, fined $25,000 for an obscene gesture. Do you know the gesture he gave? The old DX crotch chop.  I was pleased because it took me a minute to find what the gesture was. I had to do a little internet sleuthing.

Greg: I assumed it was the middle finger, but no, it's the old DX suck it. I was happy to see people are still putting that one out there. There's something retro actively wonderful about that. It takes you back to a better time when the crotch shop was prevalent, and wrestling was a bigger part of our lives.

JT: Sucks to have this guy on your team though Greg huh?

Greg: It does. It sucks a lot. If I'm opening for the days of X-Pac, who God rest his soul, right?  Didn't X-Pac leave us a couple years ago? Please look that up while I'm talking here. I think X-Pac left us. I believe something stupid happened. I believe it was like a backhoe accident or something. Something ridiculous. But yes, having Dwight Howard on my team, I can go off about the Hornets while you look that up. I am very unhappy with the Hornets at this point. I watched them lose a game the other night by just a couple points. It was a game they should have won. It was a game that was in their hands. The worst part is, now these teams have a Twitter presence. Any person on Twitter who feels like they need to be commenting or making observations of what's going on, that's not their job. They should just keep quiet. They may say

everything's going great, but we're watching the game,  I can see when it goes down to the

other end of the floor. Offense has no freaking clue what they plan on doing. There's no person that's gonna take command. People are jacking up threes. People are playing hero ball. Nobody is doing anything. We all saw the great video of Cody Zeller getting blocked four or five times by Porzingis last night when they played the Knicks. It's disgusting basketball right now. There's teams all over this league playing above their capabilities and beating teams they shouldn't beat. Even the Suns beat somebody the other night. They beat the Thunder. They beat the

Wizards. The Suns are a garbage team, and they are beating people. The Hornets are trash right now, and it makes me so mad to watch. The coach after the game says everything's fine. We're gonna tighten up on defense. Old coach Cliff gonna tell me everything's gonna be fine, just gotta tighten up on D? Knock off that trash right now. You're playing like trash! Nobody cares. There's no go-to guy. You're wasting a good rookie. People are laughing about Malik right now.

JT: He wasn't that good

Greg: He is pretty good, the horn isn’t using him very well. I'm getting tired of watching these games. They're not playing well. It's driving me nuts. I'm used to them sucking, but this seems

worse. I had a little bit of hope. I haven't even said a word about Dwight Howard. Dwight Howard is a walking disappointment. That guy has been okay for us, but he should be so much better, so I won't shit on him too hard. We have so many other problems.  He's just a small part, but damn it.

JT: Well said Greg, well said. I don't know if this is gonna brighten your spirits at all, but xpac lives Greg.

Greg: Why did I think he was dead?

JT: He was arrested earlier in the year for meth.

Greg: Okay, just dead inside.

JT: I won't go as far to say that, but a little trouble with the law. He is alive. Road Dogg was the d-o-double-g. Road Dogg, I almost thought they were the same person.

Greg: Not the same person, just the same kind of person. The DX kind of person.

JT: Don't forget about Mr. Ass too.

Greg: I don't want to go too deep here with the wrestlers, but we love Mr. Ass. We're gonna move on to predictions. What is the prediction for me this week JT?

JT: We are about one month into the season. Neither one of our beloved teams are doing particularly well. Is it too soon to call this season a bust and just fucking tank it Greg? Should we tank it?

Greg: It’s too early for us to tank. Do you feel like the Jazz are playing as bad? I haven't heard you complain that much about them.

JT: I’ve been keeping it quiet Greg. Some things don't feel good to talk about.

Greg: I should have asked. I feel like it's my fault that we haven't gotten to it sooner. There was an issue that I knew was there, and I was avoiding it.

JT:  Things aren't good. I think you're in the same boat but we play on. 

Greg: I just don't know what we would be tanking for. Do you feel like your organization drafts well enough that you would get a great player and turn next season around?

JT: I don't know if it's that that I worry about. other More so having an effect on our rookie Donovan Mitchell and and pissing off Rudy. He might be less inclined to stay after his contract expires. It's pretty hard to watch sometimes. We just can't fucking buy a bucket you know? Rudy's working. Rudy looks exhausted. He looks so tired because he's working so hard. You got favors shooting threes and Rudy's shooting jump shots a little bit. You see them looking for offense wherever they can find it. It's a little disheartening. 

Greg: I feel the same way. 

JT: It's not that I'm worried about the draft for them finishing low and getting the draft pick, it's the fact that it's tough to attract free agents when you're just not good and missing a couple pieces. We need almost a whole team. I'm just wondering if it is time just to get rid of everybody  and roll the dice as they are and then see what happens and start with new players next year and see what we can do.

Greg: Too early to say, but you know come on guys give us something to get excited about . Let's get some wins. 

We're gonna be back next week with another episode, and in the meantime you can follow us on twitter @doubledrivelers or you can email us at [email protected]. Subscribe to the show on iTunes, podbean, or Google Play, and until next week we'll see you on the Internet.

[celebrityresearch-blog]

Stephen Colbert - November 6, 2017

I’d like to preface this entry by explaining the obvious; considering the great wealth of online clips of Stephen Colbert due to his position as host of The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, and considering my lack of knowledge about the protocol for Conan interviewing other late-night hosts, what I have compiled is an abridged collection of Colbert’s recent interviews and performances as well as any upcoming events I believed may be significant for his appearance on Conan. 

Stephen and Conan in NYC

Conan: November 4, 2011 (link) (During Conan’s week at the Beacon Theater)

In the middle of his monologue, Conan spots Jon Stewart in the audience. After Conan reminds Stewart he is missing the taping of The Daily Show, Stewart sprints out, Conan requests another ticket-holder is brought in from the lobby, and Colbert enters as the replacement for Stewart’s seat.

Colbert quips he found the ticket for the show on the ground outside.

After Conan reminds Colbert he has a show airing in 18 minutes, Colbert assures Conan that is plenty of time to write a show. When Conan updates the countdown to 17 minutes, Colbert frantically evacuates the theater.

The Legally Prohibited from Being Funny on Television Tour: June 2, 2010 (link)

During a performance in New York City, Colbert appears on stage, mentions Conan’s recent facial plastic surgery, and jokingly insults Conan for leaving NYC (following the ending of his Tonight Show stint). 

Conan criticizes Colbert for claiming to be a true New Yorker, when in reality, he’s from New Jersey.

Colbert suggests a physical altercation with Conan, which turns into a dance-off.

After Colbert falls and injures himself while dancing, Jon Stewart storms the stage to prevent Colbert from surrendering to Conan. Stewart then starts an aggressive dance-off to the song Sandstorm by Darude, during which he too falls.

As Stewart lays injured and dying on the ground, Colbert hovers over him and requests that Stewart, as his dying offering, give Colbert the 11:00 pm slot. 

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: October 14, 2017 (Conan as guest)

David Letterman’s Horse (link)

(The last time Conan appeared on The Late Show, it was being hosted by David Letterman.)

Conan congratulates Colbert on his Late Show success.

After discussing their mutual respect for Letterman, Colbert mentions Conan’s piece written in honor of Letterman’s retirement, which was published in Entertainment Weekly.

Conan recounts a long tale, in which, because Letterman appreciated the EW piece, he sent Conan a horse, delivered by two cowboys, an hour before a taping of Conan. 

The horse, named Dave, requires an immense amount of upkeep including room and board at an expensive facility.

Conan cannot ride the horse because it has bucked off the last two people who attempted to get on it, so in order to clear it for riding purposes, Conan would have had to hire an “expensive horse lawyer.” 

After two years of rooming the horse, Conan’s wife sends the horse, named Dave, to an equine massage center, where students learning how to massage horses may practice massaging techniques on Dave all day.

Colbert is overwhelmed by the length of Conan’s story. (As was I.)

#PuberMe and Harvard (link)

Colbert mentions Conan’s submission for the #PuberMe challenge — a viral hashtag that prompted celebrities to Tweet pictures of themselves during puberty in efforts to aid relief for Puerto Rico.

Colbert mentions Conan’s Ivy League past at Harvard and inquires about his desires to become a serious writer.

They discuss their mutual love of Flannery O’Connor. Conan’s favorite of O’Connor’s work is A Good Man is Hard to Find, while Colbert’s is The Enduring Chill.

Conan was ashamed of his Harvard identity when he first took over for David Letterman. 

Conan tells another (great, but equally long-winded) story about how his finger was jammed into his ring while playing basketball, and he had to visit a particularly rough hospital in East Los Angeles, where his ring dilemma was met by patients who had been shot in the face, attacked by pitbulls, and burned with acid. 

Traveling for Conan (link)

Colbert praises Conan’s travels to seven countries in the past two years.

Cobert asks what Conan loved most about Israel, and praised Conan for nobly acting as a “common fool.”

Conan stressed the importance of demonstrating to other nations that Americans can laugh at themselves and can stand to be laughed at. 

Conan explains how his travels have made him feel re-energized about his work at Conan, and he recounts his recent trip to the Holy Land, where his sound guy caused a scene by hitting an 800 year old lamp in the Church of Nativity, which caused hot oil to spew everywhere. 

Other appearances:

Face the Nation: December 25, 2016 (link)

(This interview with John Dickerson came a year after Colbert’s popular Face the Nation interview at the end of 2015.)

Following the election, Colbert says the good news of 2016 lies in individual relationships, and not in the nation’s politics. 

Makes a lengthy comment on political divisiveness, and explains that dividing into teams is only worthwhile if your team wins.

In preparation for his live coverage of the 2016 election, Colbert and his team prepared material for three out of four possible election outcomes, the fourth of which occurred: Trump was predicted to win with little uncertainty. He chose not to prepare material in event of this outcome because he knew if this occurred he would be performing for an audience of very depressed individuals.

Despite his own rant against political divisiveness, he admits it’s hard not to be divisive in his line of work because he tells jokes and every joke has a little knife in it. 

Years ago, he coined the term “truthiness” to describe the tendency to believe what feels true rather than what is verified by facts. In light of Oxford Dictionary’s selection of “post-truth” (absence of facts) as word of the year, Colbert expresses his fear that if there are no facts, there is nothing to agree on.

Colbert urges his viewers to seek out other news sources besides him.

He highlights the benefits of humorously covering an election cycle; it’s one story and no one dies.

Colbert explains that writing jokes about trump isn’t as much about swinging at a ball as it is picking which ball to swing at.

The biggest lesson he learned about interviewing was not to hold a pen. During his time at The Colbert Report, he played a character that battled his guests in a debate style, but as a late-night host, putting down the pen allowed him to drop the caricature act and truly listen.

After all of his 2016 live specials, Colbert was reminded the beauty of writing material under pressure because some of his best shows that year were written in a matter of hours or even thirty minutes.

His happiest moments of 2016: Stevie Wonder singing him “Happy Birthday” on their mutual birthday, taking his son to college, his friend diagnosed with cancer learned her disease would be treatable.

Colbert recommends Trump should read The Constitution, Art of the Deal, and the phrase “The buck stops here” because a president must not blame others for his own actions. 

After reading The Art of the Deal, Colbert learned that Trump will be friends with anyone.

Colbert would not turn down the chance to have any sitting president on his show (similar to Conan’s opinion) but he would like to find a way to respectfully challenge the POTUS.

When Trump came on his show during the 2016 election cycle, his liberal fans skewered him for being too lenient, but he greatly respects the presidency, so he finds it morally unsound to be disrespectful.

Looking ahead, he hoped to get more sleep in 2017.

Colbert’s talk show advice: listen, be up to date on the news, be able to read, know how to improvise, learn to be happy with failing, don’t blame anyone but yourself for the outcome of the joke. 

SHOWTIME’s special Stephen Colbert’s Live Election Night - November 8, 2016 (Signing off) (link)

Shaken and awe-struck, Colbert says he cannot bear to sit down, and he somberly comments on the “exhausting” and “bruising” nature of the election.

Remarks that both parties believe the other political party is a threat to the nation and a cause for fear, and he compares bipartisan hate to ingesting poison.

Richard Nixon was his first president as a child, and he grew up during Watergate. He blames Watergate as the moment in American political history where we all stopped trusting each other, but he insists that even then young people did not discuss politics to this extent; dinner table conversations were geared towards religion and guessing which family members were gay, rather than political affiliations.

Comes from big Catholic family, including siblings James, Edward, Mary, William, Margo, Thomas, Jay, Elizabeth, Paul, and Peter. His mother was born two days before women could vote for the first time in a presidential election.

Before his mother died at the age of 92, she told Colbert she was finally ready to vote for Hillary. The only Democratic she ever voted for was Kennedy. 

Colbert insists we are not meant to absorb this much election coverage, which is why so much exposure to/information surrounding it is so boring (i.e. electoral college, C-SPAN).

To end his live coverage, he rattles off national American truths such as the proper way to eat Kit Kats, the designated fate of YouTube pranksters, and a perpetual unknowing of the purpose behind the War of 1812.

Upcoming events

Homes for Our Troops (November 4-14, 2017)

Event hosted by Cher, George Clooney, Jake Tapper, and Ben Stiller, which aims to give mortgage-free, specially-designed homes to wounded veterans. 

In order to raise money, items will be put up for auction on eBay, and all proceeds will go directly to the charity.

Both Conan and Colbert (as well as other late-night hosts) have offered up tickets for their shows and photo opportunities as an item for bid.

Night of Too Many Stars (November 18, 2017)

Hosted by Jon Stewart 

Fundraises for Robert Smigel’s NEXT for autism charity, which supports autism schools, programs, and services

Celebrities listed to star alongside Stephen Colbert include Louis C.K., Olivia Munn, Adam Sandler, Chris Rock, and John Oliver.

[vioncentral-blog]

Winning It for Chuck: One SI Writer’s Plea to Cheer for the Dodgers in the World Series

https://www.vionafrica.cf/winning-it-for-chuck-one-si-writers-plea-to-cheer-for-the-dodgers-in-the-world-series/

Winning It for Chuck: One SI Writer’s Plea to Cheer for the Dodgers in the World Series

As a child, my parents would regale me with tales of where they were when the hobbled Kirk Gibson hit his iconic home run off of Dennis Eckersley in Game 1 of the World Series. Returning from a wedding on the west side of Los Angeles, they heard the radio call and noticed multiple cars pulling over to the side of the freeway and honking their horns in celebration. Commutes and general traffic safety halted while Los Angeles county and its swath of 10 million citizens celebrated one of the most unlikely and memorable moments in baseball history.

Opposing fans are quick to joke about Dodger fans arriving in the third inning and leaving in the seventh, but consult the stadium’s response to Gibson’s homer, their sendoff to Vin Scully last season or Justin Turner’s walk-off home run in Game 2 of the 2017 NLDS. In those moments, and throughout the regular season, you’ll find an impassioned group that finishes either near or at the top of attendance every season.

My parents heard the radio call in 1988. I was born in 1989.

MLB Why you Should Root for the Astros in the World Series

So when the Dodgers clinched their first pennant in 29 years last week, my first instinct was to call my dad, who too often upended his weekend plans to take a pouty, baseball-obsessed son to Dodger Stadium’s top deck to watch a team that never finished any better than second or third place.

The second call I wanted to make, I couldn’t.

Among the countless Dodger fans who populate Kerouac’s “loneliest and most brutal of cities,” I cultivated a true kinship with one other person always willing to tolerate endless queries about their transactions, nightmare ownerships and in-game decisions. I’ve worn out the patience of friends, girlfriends and family with talk about the Dodgers. But I knew one person would always be happy to listen.

Chuck Ballingall was my debate coach, history teacher, economics teacher and mentor during my often arduous teenage years at Damien High School in La Verne, Calif. Undersized and underslept with a funny mushroom haircut, I channeled whatever intellectual energy I had away from Odysseus’s journey after the fall of Troy and the function of mitochondria into studying the Dodgers’ upcoming season and how to perfect my fantasy baseball team. As a “never-will-be” infielder who couldn’t hit the ball more than 150 feet, I stood no chance at the athletic glory I envisioned in my backyard as a child. It’s hard to make the big leagues when you get cut from the JV team twice, and those football dreams are mere illusions when the coach says he won’t miss you if you don’t return for the second day of freshman practice.

So Chuck pressed to get me to join the debate team, a group whose legacy is rich with unathletic adolescents whose competitive fire is channeled into argument instead of physicality. He invested plenty of hope and resources into my becoming one of his star debaters for a nationally competitive team.

I let him down. I neglected research assignments the same way I did my homework. I performed well enough at tournaments, but seldom exceeded expectations and never worked as hard as my teammates.

Fortunately, Chuck was a Dodger fan. A native of Fountain Valley, Calif., he was one of the top collegiate debaters in the nation during his university years, a lexicon of American history and macroeconomics, and would soon become a nationally recognized debate coach and revered AP US History and Economics teacher at Damien. A lifelong sports fan who recorded mock talk shows on his own as a child, he was the recognized PA announcer for Damien basketball and baseball. He rooted for the Dodgers during the halcyon years of Garvey, Cey, Lopes and Russell and saw Sandy Koufax pitch as a kid. He’d happily recount those memories to me when the Dodgers limped to another third-place finish or sent Daryle Ward up for a pinch hit appearance.

MLB Remembering the 29 Long Years Since the Dodgers Last Made the World Series

With a booming baritone voice that reverberated through the worn speakers of Damien’s gym, Chuck’s PA work had a melodic and authoritative tone present in only the finest voices. He worked Clipper games when the regular announcer was unavailable. One time, I trekked out to Dodger Stadium to hear him fulfill his lifelong dream of announcing the Dodgers. His idol, and computer background during my sophomore year, was Vin Scully.

Chuck knew I was a distracted student and debater. Guilt gnawed at me that I was actively failing a teacher who invested faith in my future. Ultimately, I did enough to avoid failing, but seldom more than that. Even when he knew I probably hadn’t prepared for an upcoming tournament, we’d pile into a van full of rank and bawdy teenagers and drive.

We’d drive from La Verne to Berkeley. Or Stanford. Or Las Vegas. Or Long Beach. Wherever the tournament was that weekend, Chuck navigated us with his zest for passing on the right and ear-splitting renditions of Billy Joel and Elton John. As the rest of the team faded to sleep in the backseat, he’d ask me whether the Grady Little was the right replacement for Jim Tracy. Or whether the Dodgers should have held onto Paul LoDuca instead of shipping him to the Marlins. He’d quiz me on World Series MVPs of years past, of Dodger lineups from his youth and to name trades exactly as they were executed. I may have I could always talk about baseball.

As high school ended, the conversations were less frequent, but we’d meet up twice a year to discuss the Dodgers. As college ended and I moved east to New York City, I’d meet up with him once a year when he visited his brother and nephews in New Jersey. We missed each other the last two years.

The last time I heard Chuck’s voice was on December 4, 2015. I was drinking alone at my local haunt, nose in a book either trying to atone for my past sins of missed homework assignments or simply drinking alone. An alert arrived that Zack Greinke spurned the Dodgers to sign with the Diamondbacks. Speech slurring and vision doubling, I called Chuck to alert him of the tragedy.

MLB The Astros and Dodgers Exemplify Contemporary Baseball. Now, They Meet in the World Series.

He picked up and chatted. We weren’t sure how we’d solve Greinke’s departure if we were the GM, but the conversation lasted 40 minutes. He restructured his Friday evening to talk about the Dodgers with an inebriated former student. Regardless of his endless work obligations at debate tournaments, basketball games or mock trial events, Chuck always found time to keep up with his former students.

This past August, Chuck’s heart gave out at 56 years old. His memorial service at Damien was nearly filled the gym. I think my relationship with him was special. But the beauty of the ceremony was that the halls teemed with former students and colleagues with whom he forged similar bonds. My relationship with Chuck was special, but hardly unique.

It’s a tough year to tell you to cheer for the Dodgers ahead of the Astros. The city of Houston is reeling from the devastation of Hurricane Harvey. Jose Altuve is baseball’s most exciting player, and one who can bring the casual follower into fandom. The city of Houston needs this title more than the Dodgers, the league’s richest and arguably smartest team, does.

Of course this is the team that broke the color barrier while in Brooklyn, made fans of Mexicans (Fernandomania in 1981), Japanese (Nomomania in 1995), South Koreans (Chan-Ho Park in 1997) and local boys (Justin Turner). The Dodgers have always been keen about the demographics of its adopted city, and their stars often reflect the impossibly diverse population. The crowd at Dodger Stadium is the richest tapestry of ethnic backgrounds that you’ll find in the nation. It is fundamentally American. The Dodgers may be presented as this coastal behemoth towering over the middle markets, but all they’ve done is invest smarter and evaluate players better (though it helps to have the money).

Ultimately, I just want this one for Chuck. I smarted about the Cubs winning last year’s World Series until I saw the countless videos of older men and women weeping at the site of the Cubs hoisting the World Series trophy and the testimonials of people wishing that their grandfather, father or friend had been around to see it.

While I let out a yip and a clap when the Dodgers clinched the first pennant of my lifetime, a prevailing emptiness followed the elation. Rooting for teams is an unwise investment of our emotions that leaves us ultimately defenseless when they lose again. When the payoff finally came after years of heartbreak, I felt the burden of annual sorrow lift. And then I remembered that the second call I wanted to make wasn’t possible anymore. There’s a fondness that accompanies the memories of someone lost to time, but missing them never gets any easier.

This will be our year, Chuck. And we’ll chat about it someday.

#cheer #chuck #dodgers #series #winning #world #writer

[scottielambchop]

My Review of The Summer Set Festival (1/2)

You know, as a 32-year old man, I don’t really feel like I’m all that old. I’m hip, I still have that old devil-may-care attitude, I’m in pretty good shape, I play video games and don’t have many responsibilities. I love music, and I certainly feel that I’m more than open listening to new music and giving it an honest shot.

Then I started my security job at a Minneapolis bar called Psycho Suzi’s and got to know (and befriend) many people in their early 20s. Now, I’ve now come to realize that I don’t know shit. One such coworker recently posted the flyer for Summer Set (a local EDM festival), and only three names sounded familiar to me: Run the Jewels, Die Antwoord, and Zeds Dead—and that last one was only because it’s a Pulp Fiction quote.

So, as an attempt to fit in with these wacky youths, I’ve decided to listen to one song by each band (group) in the order it was written on the flyer and post my initial thoughts on each. It’s like a stream of conscience from hell. Let’s see how this one goes.

Zeds Dead - Frontlines (ft. GG Magree): This girl’s voice is okay, but musically who gives a shit? Oh, never mind; now it’s turned into a goddamn dubstep song. What in the holy fuck have I gotten myself into? It would be a lot cooler if this featured G.G. Allin — and I really hate G.G. Allin

Zedd – Clarity (ft. Foxes): This song sounds like every song played at my gym. It’s fine. I probably would have liked it in, like, 2001 when I went through a bullshit Paul Oakenfold phase. Do you think this guy has a beef with that Zeds Dead group? I guess that would make this festival kinda neat to see how they hash that shit out.

GRiZ – Hard Times: I’m really hoping this is about Dusty Rhodes, but I think I need to get that out of my head right away. This song starts off kinda cool, like a hip hop version of a Reservoir Dogs-type movie intro. Oh, now the dumb bullshit dubstep kicked in and ruined it — should have figured that nothing stays gold in the context of this miserablelittle adventure I’m on. Also, watching this video, you need to understand this this dude is the most stereotypical white guy trying to be a hip hop DJ. It’s like if Edward Snowden put on a hockey jersey and shitty glasses.

Run the Jewels – Run the Jewels: I’ve heard this before. These guys are cool. But then again, I’m a white guy who casually listens to NPR, so of course I like Run the Jewels. My only problem with this song is that I think only Angel Witch and Minor Threat should have titular songs.

Die Antwoord – Ugly Boy: I don’t know how two people can look so much like juggalos but not be lumped into that group. Instead they’re like the best thing to happen to graphic designers since the Adobe Creative Suite. I used to really like these guys but, then again, I used to be really fucking stupid.

RL Grime – Core: This is building up to something that I’m probably gonna hate. Not to be a self-fulfilling prophecy, but holy shit was I right. It has buildups that I felt like will have a significant payoff, but then it just does fucking nothing. It’s like audio edging. For fuck’s sake, this song goes nowhere. Well, at least I can say that I also really hate their name.

Datsik – Redemption (ft. Excision):  Oh great, I found the official background music to every YouTube vape video. When they inevitably remake the Matrix movies, I fear this is all they’re going to sound like. The track says it features another artist, but the only thing I can hear is some random audio clips. But then I did some research to find out it took TWO separate DJs to make this bullshit.

Post Malone – White Iverson: First of all, this guy needs to land on his basketball references. Second of all, this video has 276,473,194 views—a number I wish I were joking about. This song just sounds like every other modern hip hop song, minimal beat and some dude inaudibly saying dumb shit without a rhyme. Now that I’ve established how milquetoast this song is, I’d really like to comment on how this guy looks. He’s the missing link from Riff Raff and James Franco’s character in Spring Breakers. Seriously, if they were to make a reboot of Malibu’s Most Wanted, casting had better snatch this honkey up QUICK! He seems like an exaggeration of someone trying to appropriate black culture, and it’s heartbreaking no one is calling him on this shit. I can’t wait until we’re in a time of post-Post Malone.

Seven Lions – Worlds Apart (feat. Kerli): Honestly, this starts out okay. Kerli has a pretty voice, the electronic beat isn’t overbearing and the video features bloated images of outer space that you’d probably find on the wall of a “worldly” teenage stoner. I’ve heard way worse. Granted, this could also be my old “techno” fan coming out. There’s a middle dubsteppy part that I could do without, but whatever. Yeah, I didn’t mind this one.

Zomboy – Like A Bitch: Right from the get-go I’m told to, “stop acting like a (woop) and get my hands up.” Here’s the deal, Zomboy: you only get one chance to make a first impression. And you insulting me for not doing what you want isn’t going to make friends with anyone. So, no, I won’t stop acting like a bitch.  The mere fact that you keep repeating it, isn’t going to motivate me to do it any faster—if at all. With that said, musically, this also sucks.

Audien – Something Better (ft. Lady Antebellum): Hey! This has a structure of a legit pop song! I don’t know if this project has been beating me down, or if this is actually decent. Don’t get me wrong, it has the really annoying electronic hooks that most modern music has, but compared to some of the garbage I’ve already put in my ears, it’s pretty alright.

Bakermat – One Day: Man, what a progressive song. Nothing says, “heartstring cash grab” better than mixing samples of MLK’s “I Have A Dream” speech and sexy saxophone with generic dancy electronic beats. It honestly sounds like the backing beats to Marky Mark’s “Good Vibrations.” Oh well, at least it was short.

Big Wild – Aftergold: This song sounds like it was tailor-made to be used in the opening narrative of an “inspirational” teen movie. Imagine an opening shot of an urban high school with the main character doing a voice over explaining his life and school, now think of the music that is playing in the background. Yeah, you’ve got it. It’s light and floaty with an array of unique instruments (strings, Taiko drums, etc.) and then sample in some record scratches and electronic noise and that’s it. It’s not offensive. It’s not anything. It’s just a thing.

Bleep Bloop – Slippin: Before I start, I want you to know that it was THIS band that made me venture into this masochistic assignment. It all started when a group of younger coworkers posted the flyer for this festival on social media and expressed their sincere excitement. Now, being the complete asshole I am, decided to shit all over their good time by stating that it sounds like the worst time imaginable. (I was essentially being facetious because I really don’t care what they listen to. But for the record: I’m right). Anyway, after skimming through the names, my eyes caught the name “Bleep Bloop” and everything in me laughed and cried all at the same time. I voiced my opinion about this band without ever hearing them, stating that this just sounds like a generic EDM placeholder until these assholes can figure out something dumber to call themselves.

Cut to a few days later. It’s a Saturday and once we were finished closing up, I decided to invite some coworkers over for drinks. While everyone is over, I take it upon myself to throw on a record that I figured would appeal to many. So I put on my copy of T-Swift’s 1989 (it’s solid pop-gold, fight me). I throw on the record, and it’s mostly well received. At this moment, the person I was giving shit to about Bleep Bloop made his opinion heard by stating that he can’t believe that I would listen to/enjoy 1989, but refuse to open myself up to Bleep Bloop. Now once he said “Bleep Bloop” out loud, I couldn’t help by throw myself into maniacal laughter. I mean, just think about how goddamn stupid that sounds. Imagine your favorite band of all time. Then imagine their name is fucking Bleep Bloop. Now try and defend that band to someone who hasn’t heard them before. It turns into the biggest, most useless uphill battle you’ve ever waged upon someone else. It’s also just really funny for the other person, if you’re dead serious about them.

Okay, now that I’ve got the backstory of this shit-ass band, it’s time to dive into the music.

This is just a series of dumb sound effects. It honestly sounds like it was created on the Playstation version of MTV Music Generator. Then they have remixed versions of a guy saying the same damn thing. It’s seriously giving me a headache. I don’t know why anyone would want to listen to this for enjoyment. It’s really fucking confusing. All in all, it’s exactly what I expected out of a band named Bleep Bloop.

Destructo – Higher: Have you ever seen an action movie from the late 90’s/early 00’s where the protagonist has to kill a mafia boss in the middle of a douchey club? You know, those scenes where in which shit really escalates into a full-blown gun fight and the fire alarm goes off making everything wet creating a unique aesthetic? Yeah, this is the shitty music playing at the beginning of the scene that lets the viewer know that the location really sucks. The video is blatantly alluding to straight-up heroin/sex addiction—it’s pretty glamorous. And then she dies at the end from a broken heart while some guy repeats, “get higher, baby.” All in all, better than other stuff already reviewed on this godforsaken list.

Ghastly – We Might Fall (ft. Matthew Koma): This video started out by saying “Dubstep Electro House” which is weird because I can almost guarantee it should just say “whiny dude singing over bullshit.” It started off slow with dumb vocals, then it slowly built up to a techno climax (which is also a medical term for when you ejaculate lasers) with a high-pitched autotune. And then it repeats. Whatever, it sucks, but it’s fine.

Well folks, that’s it for the first half. I’m currently waiting on edits for the second. I’m sure you’re waiting with baited breath. Trust me, it fucking sucks.