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#i was willing to pay A  LOT at the time
red-dyed-sarumane · 3 months
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i need people to start paying me for every time they tell me "oh but ur arts so good ur wasting ur talent u need to do it professionally" wrong i need to do art to draw beautiful characters that not a single other person cares about while feeding every ounce of love i have into my work or to convey thoughts & feelings beyond words and to even think of doing otherwise is to deny my own nature "oh but u can do what u want and then sell it" why is everything about money to you why cant u just enjoy things at what point in ur life did u forget how to have fun
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thrumugnyr · 11 months
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WAIT ITS BEEN THAT LONG IN THE CAMPAIGN??
Patataj and Rahadin have been dating for 1.5 years??? O.O
Idk why am I surprised knowing how time can be in DnD lol but the fact its been a while gives me hope things won't end too bad for them babsba
Altho it's cute Rahadin showed up to support his boyfriend I'm kinda suspicious of his answer GAH
OMG, I should have clarified this better: we have been playing this campaign for 1.5 years - the time passed for Patataj is only about 2 months and that's about the time that they're dating, or, well, know each other at least.
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Let me tell you chronologically how he ended up in a relationship with Rahadin (this is LONG and has spoilers for CoS so beware):
Rahadin was the first person Patataj met after he woke up in Barovia (he got dragged in through a dream by, as we would later learn, the Abbot, who was looking for sun god support in his endeavor to fix the curse (of Strahd) and accidentally grabbed Patataj over Senna).
Rahadin was there to check out the newcomers mostly (and because my GM was scared of combat balance haha) and they went through the death house experience together. For Rahadin this meant nothing much, but for Patataj that's an intense bonding experience (also they were holding hands for most of it, as Patataj was the only one without darkvision).
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After they made it out of the death house, Rahadin disappeared, but Patataj took up the sending spell on his level up a few days later and thus was able to send Rahadin little messages. That's how he was able to secure a meeting with him as well. That meeting went rather poorly, but he managed to not get killed. You must also know that by this time, Rahadin just seemed like a sulky, shy dusk elf to Patataj. Someone who would be funny to make flustered and drag out of their shell a little. Not much else. He hasn't really seen him do damage or anything.
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He does start to ask random people he meets about Rahadin though and then slowly realized that, well, he does not seem to be a terribly well liked guy. Kasimir (the leader of the few surviving dusk elves) tells him to stay away from him, but Patataj doesn't quite know why, because he gets along quite well with him.
So after a few days (and after the party killed the Aboleth in the lake) he asks Rahadin for a second date to make up for the first one and to his surprise, Rahadin agreed.
They have like a romantic little boat ride and Rahadin even brings a scroll for Pataj so he can walk on water (because he mentioned missing being able to run in the open desert and the lake is...pretty big and the next best option). Of course Patataj goes for a run but in the end he can't just let Rahadin sit all alone in the boat so he offers him a ride.
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And that's how this picture happened ahaha. YES, IT WAS ACTUALLY A THING not a dream or anything - I know!! Wild!
Centaurs don't just offer someone to sit on them willy-nilly (if at all), so in the end Patataj confesses to Rahadin that he caught feelings. He's a bard after all and centaur hearts beat fast.
Of course for Rahadin it's way too soon to reciprocate such feelings the same way (I mean, they knew each other for....two weeks at this point, maybe one? And he's like 500 years old. Them centaur hearts be moving in hyperspeed to him). But he still admits a certain fondness and they actually do kiss when Patataj asks for one.
Some time passes, Patataj keeps sending those sending messages and they interact like that every day. Just small things, as sendings have a limit of 25 words ahaha.
Eventually, Strahd invites the party for dinner, as he does. Everyone is low key terrified, but Patataj is excited to meet Rahadin again....and it goes well. Our warlock pisses Strahd off majorly because he continuously keeps the appearance of the girl Strahd is into, but Patataj is having a great time, even winning a bard-off against Escher.
Patataj ends up spending some of the night with Strahd, ending in him offering Strahd his blood (and I do not think he was even charmed. We're all still confused as well. Strahd just was very good with words and made Patataj feel sad for him okay?). Rahadin ends up taking care of Patataj for the rest of the night and it all gets very emotional, they exchange gifts, they kiss more, Rahadin starts to open up a little about his past and other personal things.
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No, nothing besides kissing happening - but hey, progress.
They are mostly back to sending messages and short meetings for most of the campaign then. This goes on for months in real time you know haha. It does sometimes skew with my perception how much time actually passes.
At some point Patataj manages to convince Rahadin to join a little party at the tavern in Vallaki and it's all very cute. They play like, throwing knives and never have I ever and it's really stupid but fun....thanks to probably the alcohol Rahadin does actually end up comfortable enough to do ....more than kissing that night, too. And that is actually also the last night they managed to spend together until now.
Meanwhile the campaign goes on, we go to Krezk like, twice, kill the Abbot, we do the Yester hill battle, defend Vallaki (where Rahadin was extremely worried). In Vallaki there was also one instance where Patataj almost died and sent some final words type of message to Rahadin and boy, Rahadin was UPSET about it. Mostly mad because the message did not include Patatajs whereabouts and such and it took him longer to find him. He was probably also upset that the whole thing made him so scared in the first place haha. Rahadin is not used to care about anything other than Strahd and maybe Anastrasia (and since they're both vampires, they die far less easy, so not much to worry there).
But yeah, this is how you manage to date Rahadin in Curse of Strahd: You need a GM who puts him in the campaign early enough and PERSISTENCE. It's not easy to make Rahadin care, but once he does, he's very loyal and your chances of survival become very good actually ('You wouldn't want to hurt Rahadins mate' worked very well with the werewolves for example lol) - but also it can be a little terrifying at times. Patataj is trying to come to terms with the fact that all the protection benefit he gets out of this also means that it is very likely that he will end up as a vampire in the end. Also there is no turning back. Rahadin is very unforgiving and I'm sure if Patataj would break his heart, Rahadin would slit his throat, because that's just how he deals with his problems. There is also still a chance Rahadin might follow Strahd's orders to kill Patataj despite his own feelings. It's 500 years vs a few weeks/months after all.
But I do think Rahadins feelings are genuine. He says the most romantic shit sometimes and he really was very supportive in the last session (at least as much as you could expect Rahadin to be). It was actually the first time he said 'I love you' in return! MORE PROGRESS!
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And I also do think he doesn't just want to use Patataj for personal gain. He's not a very....scheming guy. Not that Patataj would care either way. He'd do almost anything for Rahadin at this point, aside of things that go against his morals of course. It's quite funny, really. Patataj knows of all the terrible things Rahadin has done by now, but he kind of shoves it aside under 'well he did it under Strahd's orders, he wouldn't have done it otherwise' because he just can't fathom Rahadin is THAT bad/uncaring, since to HIM he is extremely gentle and sweet, even if sometimes a little struggling with showing emotions. Love makes blind, I swear.
But I'm rambling. I hope they get a happy ending. At least Patataj would deserve one after everything (all the suffering and pain of people around him and his powerlessness to help are getting to him), but it IS Curse of Strahd and who knows what will happen. Even at the best outcome, he will have to kill some if not most of Rahadins 'family', in the worst outcome, Rahadin kills him. In the most likely, he ends up a vampire in Strahd's castle, never to see sunlight again.
So yeah, on that depressing note and for anyone who read this whole thing, I'll leave you with two songs from my Patadin playlist because who doesn't have songs for their OC?
Nessa Barrett - Die first
Amber Run - I found
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realness-remade · 5 months
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i may have to make a semi urgent donation post at some point very soon. -___-
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merakiui · 1 year
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who are your favorites from genshin and twst to write about? :o I feel like I know at least a few of the answers to both (cough cough. scara, octotrio) but maybe there's some more you really enjoy writing even if you don't write them often? and that being said.. are there any characters you'd like/want to write more for? :D
I do have many other favorite characters that I would love to write more for!! The scummy fish and Scaramouchey have a tendency to live rent-free within my head too much. orz
For Genshin, I like Aether, Albedo, Kaeya, La Signora (I miss her every day of my life. T_T signora, please come back...), Xiao, Childe, Dottore, and Kazuha! Lately Cyno and Yelan have been rising to the favorite spots as well, and I have been looking closely at Pantalone...
For twst, I like Riddle, Trey, Cater, Ruggie, Vil, Rook, Idia, Kalim, Lilia!! I also love Rollo and Neige a lot. :D
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jorvikzelda · 8 months
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This may be a good and normal thing but I have absolutely zero regrets about having purchased the laptop last night. Like all day yesterday and even as I was buying I was going oh god should I should I not but now I’m not even having second thoughts about the huge display lmao
#SO FUCKING GLAD that I actually did some extra research rather than just going meh the one I looked at before is probably better#I think it was a SIGN that I got paid a little early for the month’s work and then like the day after the laptop I bought went on sale#(Didn’t actually pay immediately so I didn’t USE any of that money but that is besides the point)#Only with the reservation of man… it’s big… and heavy… and REALLY huge and that’s bad…#I HAD deep down been going ‘man if only there was a bigger laptop with the same specs as the one I wanna buy’#And then!!! This baby pops up!! With a big display and BETTER specs!!!!!!!!#Cannot begin to express my excitement at playing Real People Games like that hasn’t even been a POSSIBILITY#Stray is at the top of my list right next to ranch of rivershine#And also probably Elden Ring that shit looks NEAT#(Also yes there is a catch and a reason this one is cheaper even though it’s better! The one I was planning on getting had an OLED display#This one’s just a normal good old LCD display. But in all honesty that is ABSOLUTELY a sacrifice I’m willing to make lol)#z talks#not horse game#Also the fact it’s not currently in stock so I’ll be waiting almost 3 weeks for it also very much feels like a good thing#Like. I have a Date on which I can expect to Receive It. And that means I have a very set time frame for the stuff I want to do to prepare#(mainly organise my cloud storage to make sure everything’s where it should be)#(but that’s a bigger problem than it might sound like because I have a LOT of files)
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I emotionally blackmailed my mom and we’re FINALLY going to see Renfield tonight
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mellomadness · 11 months
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you know what. why don’t we have the option to hug our friends in the witcher 3. why can’t i give any of geralt’s old buddies a good clap on the shoulder whenever i want. why can’t i give ciri the hug she desperately needs whenever i so please. we can’t even talk to dandelion all that long but we spend like a third of the game finding him?? why am I not allowed to make geralt give his friends and family affection
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hella1975 · 1 year
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bagged a trial shift at a new pub just for my manager to immediately put on facebook if anyone wants an extra shift on wednesday. he knows what im doing
#he said GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE RN#lmfaoooo the notif came through literally as i put the phone down i was like 😳😳😳#like that 'CONNOR' tiktok audio like no king im not doing anythinggg haha wdym#anyway im a bit annoyed that the first place to get back to me from my applications was this one#bc im pretty sure their pay is still minimum wage and also my cousin worked a trial shift there once#and not only did they not pay him but they also never called him back or even emailed to politely turn him down#literally just used him for free labour and that was that#word of warning from a very tired waitress if ur thinking about starting: always take trial shifts with a pinch of salt#if the trial shift is longer than 2 hours they really really should be paying you and if they dont the odds are you got mugged off#also the woman on the phone after i said i worked at the place i currently work at was like 'and do you still work there?' SHE KNOWS#and when i said yes she was like 'would you be willing to leave?' HOW CAN I BE TWO-TIMING BOTH OF YOU RN#LYING TO ONE JOB ABOUT SEEKING ANOTHER JOB LYING TO THE NEW JOB ABOUT LEAVING THE OLD ONE COME ON NOW#IM NOT BUILT FOR THESE LAYERS#but yeah summary here is i have a shift at my actual place on wednesday (thank god i havent had work in over a fucking WEEK)#and i have a trial shift at a new place where i'll most likely be offered a job. life is picking up#ALSO i have enough money to change my america flights bc basically something came up with that and i need to change my return flight#and i was originally rlly worried bc the change cost was £161 and that piled onto my current no-shifts stress was Not Fun#but ive been working a lot for my mum and i got paid for the shifts i HAVE done and it all kinda fell together anyway#the way everything is sorting itself today within the same HOUR yet ive been stressing about these things for days now#hella goes home#hella slaves to capitalism
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jvzebel-x · 6 months
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🦋
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birdmenmanga · 1 year
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when he said "is there still anyone left in the world who you'll allow yourself to be spoiled by" that was insane
#just thinking thoughts...#this is about karasuma and tatsume squabbling over who's going to pay the bill when they go out to eat btw.#if you even care.#obviously karasuma thinks good heavens I'm an employed man making 6 figures I canNOT make this retired college professor PAY the BILL#but keep in mind they just had a HUGE conversation about. you know.#possible consequences of prioritizing others over yourself etc.#giving and giving and giving and feeling empty inside because you won't let yourself be loved despite everything you've given#hey you know one of the first serious conversations I had with the vegetarian guy was about whether people deserved to be loved#and obviously I said that everyone deserves to be loved#but with a super serious and straight face he said that nobody deserves to be loved#and what he meant was that there is a misery that comes with not being loved when you feel ENTITLED to it#and yeah I agree nobody is ENTITLED to love#I couldn't quite articulate that on that day#but if you have given away kindness to others— if you have loved others— then you do deserve a little something for what you've done#like for example he's vegetarian so he goes with people to eat dinner and stuff a lot but he sits there without eating anything#and it's like. how can you believe nobody is willing to go to a vegetarian restaurant with you after you did that for a whole semester.#how can you believe that people will be so unforgiving when you've been so nice to them!!!#how can you think after half a year of keeping these people company that they wouldn't do the same for you#not even every time. just every once in a while.#god. i don't know how to explain it. this guy's affection deficit is insaneeeee#ok mutuals be honest. the vegetarian guy checks my just thinking thoughts tag for fun sometimes but he's not very interested in bm#you think he's gonna open the tags and see this? vote now on your phones#sorry. chorus is going to be SO good. I'm telling you. it's going to be so good.#LIKE SORRY. IS THERE STILL ANYONE LEFT IN THE WORLD YOU'LL LET YOURSELF BE SPOILED BY. HELLO.#letting yourself be loved is something that can be so intimate.#guy who has distances himself so so so much from his loved ones. guy who is suffering SO much because of this choice of his
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partners sister is taking various courses to become an aesthetician and I volunteered to be her model to practice on so I got my lashes done today ✨ (which looks amazing and she only did it the first time ever?? the instructor was also pleased with her work)
and in two weeks well do some basic nail care stuff 💅 and then in november she wants to practice waxing/sugaring on me 👀
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nonbinaryeye · 8 months
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I suppose superhero movie fans and what do we in the shadows fans are not two groups with a big overlap but Harvey Guillén was hundred percent highlight of my Blue Beetle viewing experience. Just the fact that he was in it and I didn't expected was delightful but that one specific line made seeing the movie truly worthy.
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is this actually that uncommon? I don’t even unpack just the DAY I return from somewhere, but it’s literally the first thing I do. I do nothing else until I’m unpacked, I have everything organized back in it’s proper place in the house within an hour of getting home lol.. I thought this was typical??? What’s the cultural norm?
#same with groceries or anything else I;m bringing home from outside -  i put it away or d o soemthing with it immediately#I just don't like looming tasks in the background taking up my mental space like 'oh i still have to do that later' etc.#I can't relax until everything is taken care of. If i try to relax or rest when I just got home from a trip there's just always the nagging#sense that I'm going to have to get up and do something else LATER (put the stuff away) so why not just do it now#It's the whole principle of 'be more uncomfortable in the present in order to help yourself in the future'#Samme thing with covid like. Follow the social distancting tules and wear masks and do everything extremely dillignently NOW no matter how#annoying or inconvenient it is at the MOMENT because the future pay off will save you more discomfort later (more vairants coming out - long#er lockdowsn because of wider spread - you or your family getting sick - etc.)#I am ALWAYS willing to inconvenence myself and ''suffer'' temporarily in the present if it will help my future self or get me a larger#benefit down the line. etc. etc. But to me that just seems like.. literally the only rational thing to do#what's more important? my temporary emotional satisfaction or my long term wellbeing ? always the long term#it might feel good to just come home and flop onto the floor and shove the suitcases aside but is that like hour or so of rest worth#the annoyance later when you realize you've still got to put everyhting up and now you REALLY don't feel like it and etc. etc. ?#just save your future self the trouble and get it out of the way#But again I just thought it's like... everyone would also do that??? If not then when do you unpack? days later???#Kind of like how in childhood I still had a lot of issues (hadn't developed cognitive empathy really at all - no affective empathy - don't u#nderstand social cues well or people at all - etc.. which is a recipe for frustration when Living In A Society since people are always#doing things you don't understand and you struggle to communicate properly or be understood like everyone's just speaking a different langua#ge than you) and worse anger problems and there were a few times I would come home from shcool or something and just freak out and#knock my shelves in my room over and break things or etc - and it's like OKAY that feels fine in the moment but.. consider the aftermath!#now I have to spend like a whole fucking hour cleaning my room and putting everyhting back together and etc. etc. and it's like a negative#feeling on top of a negative feeling. not only am I still kind of mad but now I have EXTRA work to do when I just want to go to sleep#So in a more minor way it's the same thing like.. If I feel shitty from traveling I don't want to DOUBLE the shitty by having extra stuff to#do later and some task looming over my head. I want to get all the bad out of the way first so I can just have uninterrupted peace later lol#if that makes sense? idk lol#The one exception is once recently I had been somewhere and got legit heat exhaustion and was throwing up by the time I got home so#I didn't unpack everything then. But after cooling off and having pedilyte and stuff I still shakily unpacked before I went to bed lol
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a-dragons-journal · 1 year
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hey, you got radfems following. i don't have the names, sorry, i had already blocked them when i noticed they followed you. i've seen you around alterhuman spaces and wanted to give you a heads up. might want to do a sweep of who's following if it isn't too many.
First off, thank you for the heads-up, I appreciate the thought. However -
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fam, you are gonna have to give me names and evidence of claims like that, I simply do not have the time or energy. I also do not always have the time and energy to follow up on a specific accusation if it doesn't come along with at least some direct evidence, so be aware of that (nor do I think you should be making accusations like that without being willing to provide some direct evidence just on principle, generally speaking, unless it's one of those cases where it's blatantly clear from less than thirty seconds of scrolling their blog because it's all they're talking about).
Generally speaking, I... also care more about people I'm following/reblogging from than about people who are following me, because it's not like I'm platforming the people who follow me inherently in any way. I'm thus a lot more likely to follow up on that and actually do something about it.
Generally speaking, I don't prune my followers of anything but obvious bots, because I'm not platforming them in any way, and maybe if they stick around they might learn something and change their mind about some things. There are exceptions, but generally speaking, if they want to listen to the perspective of someone outside their circles, I'm not gonna refuse them that - that just forces them into the echo chamber that's just going to reinforce the bigoted opinions until there's no chance of changing their mind about it, which doesn't help anyone. The only way to change people's minds is to talk to them, and I'm of the opinion that while no one owes anyone that, of course, the world is a better place when it can happen.
(If I'm saying things that are attracting them because of those opinions, that I want to know, because it means I need to reevaluate myself about that, but that's a different story. Similarly, if they're actually starting to say that shit in my notes (or, worse, if I have reason to believe they're using the notes of my posts to find people to target for harassment), I'm probably going to block them about it, but that's also a different story.)
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princemick-archive · 1 year
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dima said kevmick bodyguard au and im-
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#I DIDN'T SAY IT I SUGGESTED IT BUT I DIDN'T SAY THW WORDS BUT GOD LISTEN#okay listen I know that pic implies mick bodyguard but obv kev has to be the bodyguard and mick is the spoiled rich kid#OFCOURSE IT IS#and maybe its like batman style like spoiled rich boy in public shy and kind irl#OR if we do do mick bodyguard it cud b intresting#maybe kev is part of a mob family and is working on taking over from his dad mick whos obviously from a famous military family gets called#to help out by the head of this like security company thing maybe its toto maybe is seb maybe even mattia or rene#doesn't matter hes like the top of the class but also protected by the company and omly does more safe jobs bv michael used to be head#like of the company n when he got like seriously injured during a job corinna basically forced the new head to take care of her boy#when hes on the job#so he helps kev bc big mob family who aska for the best and mick is EXPENSIVE and they're willing to pay so like kev expects this older#like buff traditionial bodyguard type bc if ur so expensive and so highly rated by a company like micks you must have a lot of experience#and then mick this 170 cm kid whos buff ye but like 25 walks in and kevs all like ??? u guys fr but mick is real fucking serious and shit#and he calls the head probably toto like '???? ur fr abt this KID' n toto is like 'yes' n kevs like aight okay and mick is there the whole#time ofc like he heard it all and instantly doesn't like kev bc stfu bitchface i can murder u with a hand tied behind my back#and like obv there's a collection of bodyguards from the top mob guys maybe these are the older drivers aka mark nando jense kimi and#they obviously dont know mick by face he was probably really really well protected by the agency as hes obv a target so they're kinda like#also '....whos this kid' just like kev MAYBE only jense knows mick bc hes sebs husband (ofc sebson shhh) so he knows and#mick and jense share like a knowing look bc they know n shit but the others r kinda iffy abt this new kid but mick is serious n all that#kyle.txt#god i shud write this down not do this in the tags#bodyguard.au
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felice-girlboss · 2 years
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Sorry I got lost who was insulting Wille????
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