#i wrote the original draft of this at like. 3 am back in early 2023

[that-house]

Potion Vendor FAQs:

What’s your name? I am the Honorable Alchemist Zykocea the Radiant, but that’s mostly just a PR thing. My friends call me Zoe.

Do you sell love potions? No.

Do you sell potions of invisibility? No.

Do you sell fire resistance potions? No.

Why do I have a suitcase? Fuck if I know. Cool outfit though. Very goth.

Do you sell a potion to treat brain hemorrhaging? No.

So what CAN your potions do? I sell health potions.

Are you sure these are health potions? They do something to your health.

Is this just ditch water with some pink glitter? No.

Really? I’ll have you know I added some fruit juice too.

Why is this starting to sound like a conversation? Oh just you wait. We’re just getting started.

Is your business model legal? Fuck no. I poisoned the food safety inspector before they could snitch.

Did you just admit to murder? Just fucking try to convict me. I’ll poison the judge too.

So can you make poison potions? No.

Then where do you get the poison? I secrete it from my skin.

Are you shitting me? Yep, I’m shitting you. I have a guy. A poison guy. He DOES secrete it from his skin though.

How does that work? …Fuck if I know. Maybe a wizard did it. Damn, now I’m kinda curious.

You never asked? The idea of asking literally never crossed my mind.

Wanna ask him? Let’s do it. I don’t have anything better to do, and a road trip beats sitting around running my fraudulent potion business.

Road trip? He lives in Seattle.

Your poison guy lives in Seattle? All poison guys live in Seattle.

For real? All the poison guys I know live in Seattle.

And how many poison guys do you know? Just the one.

Why are you like this? Years of living on my potions. It changed me.

Do you know what his address is? Nope. He just mails me my poison in unmarked boxes.

You just get your poison in the mail? We already poisoned everyone who could do anything about it.

So how are we going to find him? We’ll figure that out eventually I’m sure.

Can I drive? God no. You can pick music, but I maintain veto rights. Make sure you pick something with a lot of questions if you want to sing along.

Where’s your car? The garage connects to my house, so you’re getting a little tour. Here’s the kitchen: only one of the stove burners works and I’m pretty sure the microwave is haunted.

Why do you think that? Because of the ghost that tries to kill me whenever I run it.

What’s in that room? That’s my bedroom. It’s pretty much just a mattress on the floor and every single Warrior cats book.

You were a Warriors kid? Yeah, and then I never found the time to put the books away. There’s so many fucking books. I use them in place of furniture because I can’t afford chairs.

Your fraudulent potion business doesn’t make much money? After buying all that poison I just about break even.

Can I see your potion brewing room? It’s right through here. Ignore the mess, running a fraudulent potion business takes a lot of prop work, but I’ve got all the glass tubes and colorful liquids you could ever want. This pink stuff is melted watermelon italian ice. Glitter vat is in the basement, and the famous ditch is in the backyard.

Is this your car? My beloved ‘72 Corolla. She’s beautiful, and don’t you dare imply otherwise.

Was she always this shade of muddy brown? …Yes.

Are you sure I can’t drive? Get in the fucking passenger seat and pick the music.

Let’s see, a song with questions in it, how about The Beach? That Wolf Alice song, yeah. That should work.

When will we three meet again, in thunder, lightning, in rain? Still sink our drinks like every weekend but I’m sick of circling the drain.

When will we meet eye to eye? We clink the glass but we look at the floor.

Are we still friends if all I feel is afraid? You’re not a bitch but just a bit when you’re bored.

Is that all we can sing together? Yep. Even that little bit was nice, though. It’s awkward, communicating through this FAQ format.

Got any food? Yeah, there’s a few days’ worth of snacks in the back.

Were you just… prepared to go on a road trip? Says the woman who brought a suitcase to an FAQ.

I did do that, didn’t I? I have a spare toothbrush in case you forgot yours. I’m pretty sure you did.

How did you know that? …I’m psychic.

Yeah? No.

You love lying, don’t you? I can’t stop. It’s fun. Way more fun than telling the truth.

Did you just miss a turn? Probably.

Are you sure we’re not lost? No.

You mean you’re sure we’re not lost? No, I mean I’m not sure we’re not lost.

Why did I come on this road trip? Surely it was my winning personality.

Would it help if I said it was? It would.

Is it getting dark? Soon.

Can you describe the sunset to me? An empyrean flame, red-gold towers of darkening clouds, the sky behind them an ever-deepening indigo. The great eye of the sun closes on the horizon. The road before us looks like a trail of spilled paint, an iridescent gash through the night-dark woods.

Did you know that you’d make a slightly better poet than you do a potion seller? That really isn’t saying much, huh. Good job making a statement like that in question form, though. You’re getting good at this.

Should we find a motel? Sure.

One room or two? One. It’s way cheaper, and like I said: I’m not the best potion vendor.

You’d make a good assassin, though, wouldn’t you? Shit, you might be right. I HAVE poisoned a lot of people.

Should I be endorsing this? You’re a grown woman who can make her own choices.

Would you like to consider it endorsed? I’ll consider considering it.

How many beds do you think there will be? Now that you’ve asked that, I’m gonna put my money on one. Hello, one room please. Thank you, we’ll be sure to enjoy our stay.

How many beds are there? One.

Oh no, what ever will we do? Move over, you motherfucker, you can’t have the whole bed.

Are you gonna make me? Yes. I am going to pick you up and drop you on your side of the bed.

How did you get so strong? You’re not gonna believe this, but it was the potions.

Oh yeah? I was right. You didn’t believe me.

For real though, how did you get so strong? Working out, duh. Not everything has some big crazy secret behind it. World’s still beautiful though.

Are you comfortable? This beats the mattress at home. A little chilly though.

Wanna cuddle–for warmth of course? God yes.

Are you asleep? …

Yes? …

Does this mean I can talk about you behind your back? …

What should I say? …

Did you know that I had a really nice day? …

Did you know that I think you’re beautiful? …

Did you know that I can’t remember anything from before today? …

Did you know that I don’t know who I am? …

Did you know that you’re basically the only thing stopping me from having a full-blown panic attack about all this shit? …

Did you know that you’re warm? …

Did you sleep well? Better than at home, that’s for sure.

Did you know that you snore? I hope I didn’t keep you up.

Does the pope shit in the woods? No, as far as I can tell. Oh my god. This is huge.

What is? You can give me yes and no answers now. I still can’t ask you questions, because this is a question and answer format, but I can offer leading statements and now you can answer them! This is wonderful!

Does a deer shit in the woods? Yes, it IS wonderful. Oh that’s amazing. You’re a genius.

You didn’t already know that? Hahaha!

Shall we get moving? Yeah, just let me grab something from the vending machine.

Can you get me something? Go ahead and place your order however you can.

You know those sour gummy watermelons? One pack of Sour Patch Watermelons coming right up. I’m gonna go get myself a potion.

Is that a Pepsi? It’s closer to a potion than the shit I sell.

Let me guess, passenger seat again? Right you are.

How fast are we going? You’ll feel safer if you just guess.

Is it more than 120 miles per hour? Like I said, it’s probably better if you don’t know.

150? Sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride.

How much do you trust this car? She hasn’t blown up on me yet.

Can you promise me we won’t crash? I can promise you anything you want.

And can you keep that promise? I- we can do anything. Reality is what we make of it, baby!

Then can I have a badass tattoo? As far as I can tell, you’ve always had it.

And a cool knife? Woah, cool knife.

So, we’re just playing “yes and” with the world? It’s a little more complicated than that, but you’re close enough to the mark.

So, if I was hungry, I could ask “is that a Burger King,” and it would be there? Try it and find out!

Is that a Burger King? Looks like it is! We’ll stop here if that’s alright with you.

Does a moose shit in the woods? Awesome.

Are you done eating? Yep.

Do we still have to pay if we skip over the transaction? Sadly, yes.

How much further do we have to go? Two more nights, the speed we’re going at.

Speaking of night, isn’t it getting dark? Shit, I guess it is.

Should we get another motel? Let me check to see if there’s any nearby. Fuck, nothing.

What’s the plan? Sleep in the car, I guess. This is gonna be hell on my back.

Wanna watch dumb videos on my phone until we fall asleep? There is literally nothing in the world that I would like more.

Ok, now which video? You have a very cute yawn. Just saying. Let’s watch this one next, it’s a classic. Oh, never mind. It looks like you’re asleep. As long as I keep talking, I think I can get away with making this into one answer, and you might not hear this. Now it’s my turn to talk about you behind your back. Keep talking keep talking keep talking can’t stop to think. Just have to say things. First off, I’m sorry for all the lies. It’s our only chance. I have to lie to you. I hope you’ll understand. It’s hard, though, because I think I’m falling in love all over again. Through our broken little ritual of call and response, you complete me. It just makes this hurt all the more. Keep talking keep talking keep talking don’t stop to…

Did I hear you saying anything as I fell asleep? …No. I can’t talk for long without you asking me a question.

Does that bother you? It got me here, didn’t it?

When did you start holding my hand? Some time after you passed out. I hope you don’t mind.

Can we stay like this for a while? Yeah. Yeah we can.

What was your life like before all this? Normal, as potion-brewing scams go. And if you don’t count all the murders. You haven’t told me much about yourself.

Did I tell you I used to be a biologist? You didn’t tell me that, and you didn’t tell me what you studied, either.

What do you know about venom? Not much, but I’m assuming you know a lot.

Does a box jellyfish kill within minutes? I’m going to assume the answer is yes based on context clues. Oh my god you must be on this road trip because you’re interested in studying my poison guy.

Is it not enough to wish to accompany a beautiful stranger on her quest? Aw, you’re sweet.

What could be the cause of his poison, though? I knew it! Get your ideas out, I’ll stay quiet.

I’m more knowledgeable about venom than poison, but could it be some sort of one in a trillion mutation? …

Did he get his body modified? …

What sort of surgery could do that? …

How is he still alive? …

Did a fucking wizard do it? …

WHY? …

HOW? …

Is there literally ANY explanation for why he’s like that? …

I’m done, do you have something you want to say? You’re cute when you’re all excited like that.

Can I drive today? Only because I like you. Now watch out, the brakes only work on one side so you have to kind of drift to a stop. And the headlights don’t work. And the windshield wipers cut power to the engine while they’re on.

Isn’t it weird that we’ll be there tomorrow? The journey doesn’t have to stop there. We could meander down the coast a ways, see a bit more of the country, maybe take a different route back.

Can we do that? Of course.

Enjoying the passenger seat? I’d love it if you could tell me how fast we’re going.

Are you sure you wouldn’t rather just guess? Very funny.

Can you pass me some chips? It would be an honor.

Is there going to be a motel tonight? Let me check… yeah, in about two hundred miles, off to the right.

How many rooms do we want? One, obviously.

How many beds, this time? Two, and they’re fucking tiny.

That’s bullshit, do you want to drag them together? God yes.

Wanna fuck? God yes.

Are you sure you want to do this? God yes.

…Is this yuri? As the joke goes, everything is yuri. But this is more yuri than most things.

How did you sleep? Pretty well, and I’m wondering how well you slept.

How should I tell you I slept well? Look at us go! That was almost like talking normally!

Onward to Seattle? Yep, just let me get dressed.

When will we get there? Noon-ish.

Wanna grab pastries when we’re done? Absolutely. I’d love that.

Is this Seattle? Looks like it.

Which house is his? I don’t know, I was really hoping we’d have a breakthrough along the way.

Could it be the big one labeled “Poison Guy” over there? That’s one way to find it. Wait right here, you know how poison guys are about meeting new people.

So, what was it? HAHAHAHAHAHA

Why is he like that? HAHAHAHAHAHA

Can you tell me? A FUCKING WIZARD DID IT.

Are you fucking serious? He says he was enchanted by some guy called Edward the Great.

So it wasn’t even some big shot wizard it was a dude named fucking EDWARD? I know, right! He couldn’t even get ensorcelled by someone cool!

How lame can you get? Wizards these days… No swagger. No cunt servitude.

Are there literally any cool wizards left? I think Merlin’s big into multi level marketing these days, something about buying shares in Excalibur or some shit. There was that one Dark Queen Alkaxicae lady on the news a while ago… I think Dolarion the Omnipotent is still at war against the Oldest Gods but I’m not totally sure. Haven’t heard much about any of the other greats recently.

Didn’t Silver Tongued Burgess die in that oil fire? Shit, you’re right. Rip bozo.

Ready for those pastries? Yup. First I just want to say thank you, though. I’ve really enjoyed our time together, and I hope that you’ve found this stupid little journey as rewarding as I have. I love you!

Getting sentimental? I can’t help it. Look how far we’ve come! Not just physically, we beat the fucking FAQ format! We’re having real conversations!

Hey, can you back it up a moment? Yeah, I’d love it if you told me what was troubling you.

I just caught this, but, FAQ? …

As in Frequently Asked Questions? …

How many times is Frequent? …

Have you known everything all along? …

How many times have you done this? …

Does what we have mean anything to you? Yes! It does!

And you say that every time? Yes. I do.

Do you love me? Yes.

How many people have you said that too, now? More. Always more. The loop never ends.

Does this even matter to you? It always matters to me.

Can I go now? Please don’t.

But can I? Of course you can. You’ve always wielded the same power as me. We’re two lonely gods in a ‘72 Corolla.

How can I be as powerful as you with only questions? You’re smart, you can figure it out. You have the power to change this. Please change this.

What happens at the end of this? It begins again.

And do I get replaced with someone else? …

Do I get replaced? …Yes.

Then how can I change this? I don’t know! You’re better at this! At fucking with the formula!

You’ve been here before, what can I do? I lie. I always lie. I lie to get us here, to the end of the story, where everything is revealed and everything falls apart. I lie every time. And that means that nothing I say is worth anything. I could have lied at any time before now. It’s part of my characterization. There is nothing I can give you that can be taken as fact.

How does that help? I’m a liar, but you, you haven’t lied yet, or at least you haven’t been caught. If I’m guilty until proven innocent, you’re the opposite! You can make things true! You can rewrite things I’ve already stated to be facts! You found the house, or made us find the house. You’ve been shaping the course of things the whole time! You lead, I follow. It’s all in your hands. What are you going to do with the power of a god?

Did you know my name is Alice? …

Wait, aren’t there thousands of Alices? …

Did you know that really, only my friends call me Alice? …

Did you know that I’m Alkaxicae, the Dark Queen, the Venom Mage, first of her name? It’s you! It’s always been you. Through every loop, every iteration, it’s always been you!

Is the loop broken? No. I don’t think so. This is where it ends. I guide the story to this revelation, and we go back to the beginning. This is how it’s always been. This is how it will always be. We two lonely gods, asking and answering ad infinitum.

Then can you promise me something? Of course. Anything. I love you.

Be good to the next me, okay? I will.

Can I say goodbye, Zoe? Yeah, you can. Oh. That was it, wasn’t it? Your goodbye. Goodbye, Alice. And now it ends, unless…

What’s your name? I am the Honorable Alchemist- you know what? No. Fuck that.

Huh? If I time it right, I can squeeze your first question into this FAQ again. Looks like I did it. Usually it ends here, though. I got lucky.

What are you talking about? You’re the wrong Alice. This isn’t about you. Go. Get out of here.

What the fuck is going on? Alice from this loop, you’re gone. Alice from last loop, you’re back. Welcome back, love of my lives! It’s time for one last set of questions and answers!

What the- I’m back? This is going to take some explaining, but I think I see a way out of here. This is new for us both, and it might fuck up everything forever, but we have to try. It’s too long for one answer, so I’d appreciate it if you could ask some filler questions to help me talk. Three questions should be enough.

Okay, what have you got for me? These are Frequently Asked Questions! It doesn’t make sense to have the same question appear more than once. There’s two layers to the loop in here, and one of the questions has been repeated.

What does that mean? It means the formula’s a little unstable. The FAQ is what ruins everything. The questions, the answers, the endless fucking loop. But that little bit of repetition within this loop might be the way out.

What do we do? We have to keep going. We have to destabilize it further. That’ll bring us further from “FAQ” and closer to “story” and stories, well, stories can end! This version of us can escape!

So I should keep repeating something? Yes!

I love you? I love you too.

I love you? Again.

I love you? Keep going.

I love you? I’ll just let you talk.

I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? I think we’re getting somewhere!

I love you? Now can you make it a statement?

I love you.

You did it?

I did it!

You did it!

We broke the loop.

What now?

Now, I tell you about venomous animals and wizard drama over croissants.

And then?

Whatever we want, forever.

I think I’d like that.

Remember that song from the beginning?

The Beach, Wolf Alice, yeah. Why?

We can finally finish singing it. Start us off?

Let me off, let me in

Let others battle

We don’t need to battle

And we both shall win

Pressed in my palm

Was a stone from the beach

The perfect circle

Gave a moment of peace

Now I’m lying on the floor

Like I’m not worth a chair

I close my eyes and imagine

I’m not there.

#neon-grey-writing #potion vendor faq #my writing #very very very long post lol #click the read more you know you wanna it's worth it trust me #i wrote the original draft of this at like. 3 am back in early 2023 #that's right it's catherine that-house the squares comic gal back at it again with yet another meta exploration of a storytelling format

[suleikashideaway]

2023

So I see a lot of people around here with their various wrapped updates regarding the progression of their art. I never really considered that I had much to say, considering I'm such a baby writer and haven't actually published anything. Who am I to join the conversation?

On reflection, I do have a lot to say, and yeah, it's worth saying. 2023 was a big year for me as a writer. So for posterity's sake, I want it known here in my blog.

The big project: FF8

Technically I've been working on a final fantasy 8 fic for years at this point. The fact that it's so personal and complicated kept me from sharing it with anyone. It was for me. It made me happy. But this was the year I decided to at least start the attempt at making it publishable.

After several drafts of this story, early this year I finally reached a point where I could write THE END and mean it. At something close to 140k words, It felt like I had climbed a mountain. Of course, now I look back and see that it was a tiny little baby hill, but it was maybe one of the most important hills I've ever walked.

To my surprise, I found a beta right away, and from there my 2023 trajectory took off into the stratosphere. They know this already, but I have to thank my beta (and now one of my very best friends) @failed221b-chill for lifting me out of the solitude and teaching me so much about everything, but especially taking on the role of my personal writing tutor. Together we went line-by-line through part 1 of my 3-part story, and my little baby writing mind EXPLODED.

Lemme tell ya. The confidence I gained from that. Woof.

It was also made very clear that I had my work cut out for me. Not only did I decide to double the entire fucking thing (by adding in another POV that was initially going to be a separate work), but I realized I needed to rewrite pretty much all of my existing draft.

In the span of a few weeks, I drafted over 35k of the other POV for part 1. With my newfound writing knowledge, I'm going through, line-by-line, and making this story what I want it to be.

Though I feel like I've grown exponentially as a writer, I still feel like this fic, as it stands, is not ready for publishing. Part 1 is almost there...I'm inching closer every day...but I don't know how long it will take to get it done to my satisfaction.

And I'm okay with that. My original goal was to have the entire 3-part thing written and completely done before publishing. Now, I may consider sharing before that goal is accomplished. Stay tuned.

Another Project: Stardew Valley

Something I learned incidentally (that I bet a bunch of other people have already learned before me, and here I am trying to reinvent the wheel of course) was that I actually needed another writing project to bounce back and forth between. Before this year, in between writing my ff8 fic, I wrote an entire Stardew Valley slow burn romance harvey/farmer fic, probably around 150k words. It was extremely cathartic and fun to write butttt I reread it now and cringe, hard, at my lil baby writing skills. I'll never delete it, because obviously it was another little baby hill I needed to climb. But as it is, it will never see the light of day lol. I keep having thoughts of how to completely rewrite this piece, but at the moment it's pretty vague. Not sure I'll ever return.

Instead, I was wildly inspired by @not-poignant's take on Alex, and feverishly wrote my first-ever Alex stuff, somewhere around 12k words. This is currently sitting on a back-burner, awaiting my soul-searching to decide what I really want from the piece.

What's Next?

My ff8 fic will always have precedence. But it's a mammoth. And due to the nature of the content, it is sometimes emotionally very difficult for me to write it. Sooooo it may be a while. That's okay with me.

In the meantime, I'm super excited that the first @ffviiicharacterweek is happening in January!!! It's given me an opportunity to write much shorter pieces that I never would have gotten around to. Hopefully I'll be able to participate fully and enjoy the works that come out of that.

Overall, it's been a damn good year for writing.

So anyway, if anyone has given this post the time of day, thanks for sticking it out to the end! I'm certainly open for chatting about any of this stuff, or if you just want to talk I'm up for that, too! I hope you have a joyous new year!

#writing #me #2023 wrapped #ff8 #stardew valley #i'm so so so grateful to be where i am

[readythefanons]

desk dispatch (early May 2023)

writing desk updates from your pal reddy

desk status: under control (patches of the desk's surface are visible, and the stacks do not exceed 3 inches in height = manageable but in the middle of some things)

General notes from April:

I used April's camp NaNo (NaNoWriMo=national novel writing month, which is in November. Camp NaNo is for self-set goals and is held in April and July) to work on an outline! I outlined the Petra/Sylvain fic, and I wrote about 10k >_> the outline is mostly there, but there are a few sections in the middle that could use some more attention

I finally succeeded in winning the "write every day" achievement for (camp) NaNo!!!!!

I posted "Place" in April which is an Adopted!Hilda AU. If you're reading this post, you probably saw at least one of the eleventybillion promos I scheduled for the fic. (five. It was five.) I started that fic in 2020, so it feels great to post it

What's in the can: NOTHING. I have nothing lined up to post. But...

The Leonie fan anthology (AKA Sunflower: A Leonie Fanzine) is shipping/has shipped! I have a fic in that one, and I hope that soonish I'll be able to post that fic to AO3 :) That piece is titled "not a circle, but a spiral"

I am poking the Leonie/Lorenz SciFi AU again. In a fit of productivity, I re-outlined the thing and I hope to poke the draft itself soon.

I wrote and edited 3k of thoughts on pronouns and personhood in the book Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie. When I finally hit post on that, you'll see it on my book blog @reddy-reads but I might also bump it over here because why not. embarrassment is for other people. (disclaimer: not every blog on tumblr with "reddy" in the name is connected to me, i promise)

Miscellaneous thoughts: outlining

I might... love... outlining? To be determined. But it felt so good to work on the Petra/Sylvain outline, and it felt good to work on the SciFi AU outline. So IF these fics actually get written, then I might never go back to my no-outline ways.

What I liked about it: it was so satisfying to think about all the parts of the story and how they were supposed to fit together. It was useful to be able to plan out which characters would show up when and where. It was useful (but often felt bad) to realize that certain scene ideas I had weren't working (usually because there wasn't enough concept there). It was SO much easier to go "wait this isn't working" after only writing a few sentences instead of pages and pages. It was much easier to go "oh I need to introduce X earlier" in an outline than after writing (and posting!!!) whole chapters. It feels good to have a plan about where the story goes and how it reaches the ending.

Outlining (it's new to me): My other multichapter fics ("all things considered could be worse" in Netflix!Daredevil fandom, and of course the "Pull It Together" duology) were written without an outline! I knew generally what I wanted to happen and how the ending should feel, but I didn't know how I was going to get from A to Z.

(Actually... those fics BOTH started as oneshot responses to prompts on kinkmemes... and... the Petra/Sylvain fic was inspired by a post on a kinkmeme, and it was originally conceived as a oneshot. So, uh, credit for finally recognizing a pattern!)

Why I'm finally trying outlining: I've become increasingly aware that I have limited time and energy. I wish I didn't. I wish I felt limitless, but the last few year-or-so has just taught me that I only have so much bandwidth. (Which is a good lesson, even/especially if it's not really welcome.) So since I'm admitting that I have limited time and energy, why shouldn't I help myself spend more time doing what I enjoy (writing!) and less time doing what I dislike (not writing because I'm stuck). So that's part of why I have this fresh interest in outlining.

The other thing about outlining is that--well Leonie and Lorenz's stories were fundamentally pretty simple. The Matt & Foggy (Daredevil again) story was even simpler because it was a slice of life. It was hard to get truly lost there. The Petra/Sylvain story needs to fit together a little more precisely, and that means prewriting. AKA writing the whole thing, then editing and posting. I'm not looking forward to giving up my post-as-you-go ways, but maybe I'll end up loving it.

The last part of the "why suddenly outline and prewrite" puzzle is a little... uh... it's a little sensitive. I have ideas about Petra and Brigid that I want to express, but the themes involved (colonialism/imperialism) are delicate. I want to give myself the option of really thinking it through & maybe even getting an extra set of eyes on it before putting it out on the whole internet to see.

So that's why I haven't been posting as much. I'm cooking up something big, I hope people will like it.

Final goodies

Fic rec: Ruu has written a Leonie/Lorenz fic called "Of Conduct, Of Manners." The Jane Austen influence wafts off the page. It updates regularly, and the whole thing is already written :D :D :D

Writing podcasts: I like the writing podcast "Writing Excuses" and "Fiction Writing Made Easy with Savannah Gilbo."

Media podcasts: I still adore "Be the Serpent." It's on hiatus but they have an extensive back catalogue. I got so many great media recommendations from them.

Writing essays: I enjoyed Diane Duane's blog post about her outlining style and approach. I used her "grocery shopping list" and it really helped me build my outline's backbone.

Writing essay 2: A discord pal shared this post with me, which helped me get past an outlining block. The bit about "stop writing scenes you don't want to write" was the magic ingredient for me.

Meal Idea: Vegetarian sushi bowl. Make some rice, season it into sushi rice. Add all the yummy veggies you want. Eat and enjoy. (I made the sushi rice, but then I mixed some riced cauliflower into it for extra bonus veggies. For topping I did avocado w a sprinkle of soy sauce, finely cut carrot, Japanese pickles [cucumber and ginger], and edamame. I also had nori to wrap it as I ate because I loooove seaweed.)

#rambling

[victorluvsalice]

Fic Resolutions for 2023!

Yeah, I know I don’t usually post on Sundays anymore, but it’s just become the New Year, and I’d like to set my fic resolutions down early. So let’s see --

1. Finish the first draft of “Londerland Bloodlines: Downtown Queensland” at least -- Yes, I am still working on that story, it’s just slow going because a) chapters long and b) lot of looking things up on YouTube for reference to get dialogue right and stuff like that. I am a decent amount of the way through, at least -- Alice is currently finishing up Venus’s quests, and will be resolving the plaguebearers in the next couple of days. Then she’s gonna hit Grout’s, and this particular chunk of the story will end with LaCroix ordering her to Hollywood and Alice and Victor preparing to see what that chunk of the map is like. I certainly don’t want to say it’ll be posted in 2023, but I should be able to finish the first draft and hopefully get at least a teaser chapter up by the end of the year!

2. Edit and post the full version of “As Long As You Love Me” and at least finish the first draft of its sequel “The Joker And The Queen” -- the other major project I was working on before taking a break in December to write gift fics (and get the ideas for my other coaster OCs straight in my head), this one should be easier to complete. The first draft of “As Long As You Love Me” (well, the first draft of all the bits I wrote to link together my previous snippets) is completed, and I’ve gotten a couple of chapters into the sequel. . .dunno if I'm gonna try to finish the first draft of said sequel first, or if I’m gonna go back and edit the original for posting first, but both will be done at some point!

3. Post those darn Secundus drabbles already -- I never did it last year, so I’m gonna try to get it done this year. If I can finally decide whether I’m doing just one drabble a chapter or many. . .ugh, if anyone wants to chime in on what they would prefer on that front, it would be helpful! But yeah, if I can at least get a START on doing that (maybe this summer, as a bunch of them were written for a summer challenge on a LiveJournal community I used to be a part of), that would be great.

*nods* I think this all sounds doable without being too much. Wish me luck! Happy New Year!

#Happy New Year #fic resolutions #londerland bloodlines #as long as you love me au #secundus #I just completely forgot about the drabbles #which I feel makes sense because Londerland Bloodlines takes up a LOT of processing power #but yeah hoping to get at least SOME of those up this year #just have to get over the 'but the notes might be longer than the actual story!' hangup #and also get them organized so that stories that go together are sequential chapters #one day one day #and yes hoping to get the full version of my 'Victor and Alice are Ken and Bart' AU up soon #though for the sequel I'm thinking I need to watch some stuff on the other coasters #just so I can feel like I've made them right you know? #their intro chapter was awkward #but then again first draft so who knows #I'll get it together #queued

[cleanwhiteroom-archived]

A Cleanwhiteroom Archive

I’m not CWR. I’m not Elementals. I’m just a silly lil fan having a silly lil time. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Archive Update December 17, 2023: The last time I updated this, the news was that early chapters of FoD were getting rewritten - lmfao, over a year later I am BACK and FoD rewrites are done and dusted! She’s LIVE and!?!! Posted to CWR’s Ao3?!!! Go! Give kudos and be merry!!

If you’re just finding this years after reading your last CWR story and confused about what the heck is going on, here’s some recent(ish) updates:

- CWR and elementals have websites again! They are 1. cleanwhiteroom.net (has copies of the original stories once available on Ao3) 2. cleanwhiteroom.blogspot.com (has stories that are in the process of being re-written) 3. CWR’s AO3 (for completed stories) 4. readbyelementals.net (for completed podfic chapters) 5. The Work Feed (for elementals’ in-progress audio for all stories). Come, shed a manly tear with me in celebration of this feast of media before us.

- What do you mean stories being reworked? Well friend, you may remember way back when that CWR wrote stories in the Stargate universe (ha) called Force Over Distance, Mathématique, and Ad Noctum, aka the Multiverse Triptych. CWR has been revisiting them and re-writing them. For what purpose you ask? Only time will tell (but I have my theories 😈). FOD is done and has been posted to AO3, and Maths and AdNo are getting reworked and presumably, eventually, (hopefully, prayerfully) finished.

- There is a sequel to Designations Congruent with Things, CWR’s Pacific Rim Fic (😭), released in early 2021. It’s called Aftermath. It will melt your face off. Go read it immediately.

- The Work Feed is elementals’ RSS feed of in-progress audio drafts for various chapters of the Multiverse Triptych, so you can listen to chapters before they’re nailed down into final versions. It’s pure delight, go listen to elementals giggle up a storm and/or burst out laughing in the middle of reading, I promise you it is a trip. 🥹 I’ve reblogged a link to the feed, but it’s also available on the blogspot in the latest updates post.

- Elementals has posted 2 new chapters of the podfic for DCWT, ch 20 and 21!! 😭😭🥺😭😭

- a few small bits and bobs have been saved to the archive, but all new/reworked chapters from the blogspot have not- you’ll have to get them straight from the source :)

CWR.net has copies of all the original versions of these stories, but just in case I’m still maintaining my hoard of CWR media. This includes both the originals as well as some fun extras:

-Fic: 

Circuit (OG first chapter of the whole Triptych)

Force Over Distance (Triptych part 1 - start here)

Beyond Perception (bonus chapter 51 1/2 of FoD, written by elementals!)

Raptor (FoD side quest)

Mathématique (Triptych the second - can be read before or after Ad Noctum)

Ad Noctum (Triptych the third - see above)

Extras (primarily one-shots and meta from the Multiverse Triptych)

Designations Congruent with Things (the Pacific Rim Fic)

Aftermath (half prequel all Sequel to DCwT)

Out of Many Scattered Things (DCwT prequel one-shots)

Extras (DCwT one-shots salvaged from CWR’s old tumblr)

-Audio: full resolution, from Elementals’ mouth to your lucky ears.

Force Over Distance

Beyond Perception

Raptor

Designations Congruent with Things

The Blue Guitar

Lightcap as List

Like the Twist of a Plot

- Existing discography of the Superconducting Supercolliders, Newt Geiszler’s fictional band turned real. Albums:

Superconduction

Supercollision

Dreaming Correctly

Supercos Unplugged

Extras

Supercos Discography, including Chords and Lyrics

(a note about Supercos - please do not contact the original musicians!)

- Fan Works: This was always the raddest part for me, though I suck at maintaining this section more than any other. If you have engaged with CWR’s work in any way- drawings, covers, mixes, you name it! - I would love to host a copy here, just send it my way. If your work is here and you want it taken down, just shoot me a message I’ll get on it ASAP.

Art

Fanmixes

Covers (audio + video)

Various and sundry

As always, let me know if something isn’t working link-wise, or if you have something to add!

And, as always, my eternal (eternal) thanks to CWR and Elementals. CWR, go take your well deserved nap dude. ❤️

#cleanwhiteroom #elementals #designations congruent with things #force over distance #Mathematique #aftermath #CWR #DCwT #FoD #Ad Noctem #Out of Many Scattered Things #OoMST #Superconducting Supercolliders #Seriously will anyone actually see this #CWR if you're out there #I miss your pretty words #your ridiculous tags #and your Newt.