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#idk if yall remember anything about a ~difficult person~ i have to deal with sometimes lol
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#idk if yall remember anything about a ~difficult person~ i have to deal with sometimes lol#but this is the one who had the ''''house fire'''' that was nothing#and her sister was my sister's friend but her and the mom ganged up on my sister to call her a bully and stuff#thats the most prominent stuff that's happened with them that i think ive posted about#(also none of this has anything to do with my therapy appt i mentioned earlier skdjskjd)#but yeah. they're just difficult people. a difficult family. and the best way to deal with them is to ABSOLUTELY AVOID THEM#UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES#which has been working pretty fine!!! the last few months!!!!#but yesterday?????? i got a random text?????? and#(ok the whole family is difficult but its a mom and dad and two daughters who are roughly the same age as me and my sister)#so i got a text from the older daughter. the one closer to my age. the one i have to deal with personally more than any of them#and she was like hi!!! i feel like we haven't talked in forever!!!! how are you??????#and she texted me while i was at work so i forgot about it for a little bit#but i just replied and basically just said im good how are you 💀💀💀#so nothing consequential has happened yet. but im very intrigued by the random text#and i wonder if my 'good how are you' response is gonna open her up to say smth real sjdhksdn#like is she gonna be like 'oh im good except I HATE YOUR SISTER' bc that's what that family usually likes to talk about 😐#or is she gonna complain about her weird secret boyfriend that she's probably emotionally abusing??????#yeah that's a whole DIFFERENT AND INSANE story#or is she just gonna be like haha good ! anyway#and not speak to me again for a fea more months#we shall see!!!!#(what is my life 😭😭😭)#no bc everyday i just said. that's all so petty and stupid. girlie we are almost TWENTY YEARS OLD. GET OVER IT. OUR SISTERS ARD 13?????????#AAAAAGGGGHHHHHHH!?!?!?!?¿?¿?
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bratz-kitten · 3 years
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ASTRO OBSERVATIONS [part 5]
— people with jupiter in the 8th may experience an “abundance” of traumatic experiences throughout life, often relating to death; these are the people who truly feel like everyone they love ends up dying. at their worst, they can become desensitized to death— jupiter is ruled by sagittarius, a sign known for being in denial when in difficult situations in favor of optimism. these natives can pretend like nothing actually happened, or minimize the situation in their head so that they don’t have to face it.
— okay this might be a weird one... like, you know in asoiaf when arya was walking through the streets and was always like “i’m as quiet as a shadow”? that’s literally the energy of someone with planets in the 12th house/chart ruler in the 12th house. these people are so stealthy. they’re able to move so quietly and without anyone noticing, both literally and figuratively. on one hand, they’re very quiet about their plans and ambitions to the point where other people only find out when they’re achieving success over it; on the other hand, they just. don’t like making noise while walking idk bitch you’ll only see me coming when i’m right beside you, i even get paranoid that i’m breathing too loud and that other people will hear 
— people with moon aspecting mars can be incredibly impulsive when they feel hurt or triggered. yall need to be careful with doing things in the heat of the moment that you know you’ll regret later... but in the moment, you feel so hurt that it clouds your rational side. please be more self-aware about this because you may make decisions that will directly affect you for the worse in the future 
— people with leo mars ft. constantly asking you for pictures... about anything. they just wanna SEE LMFAO THEY DON’T CARE WHAT IT IS THEY’RE SEEING. you just got ready to go out? “send pics of your makeup and your full outfit”. you’re waiting in a long boring line to get the covid vaccine? “send pics of the line”. your mom baked cake? “send pics of the cake”. plus they send so many random pictures while texting, it’s their special love language
— having moon conjunct moon/venus in synastry feels insane. you tell them something you’ve been through, and they’re immediately like “that happened with me as well.” it doesn’t even have to be something grand, sometimes just very specific things you thought were particular about you. the amount of understanding that comes with this aspect in synastry can feel very new and intense especially if you’re used to seeing yourself as the “odd one out”, used to feeling isolated in your experiences 
— people with pluto in the 1st house often feel the need to erase “traces” of their existence, for example deleting messages that they sent people, deleting all of their social media posts. they can feel anxious and paranoid about other people having access to their past self, even if the past self in question is from, like. a week ago 
— people with chiron in the water houses (4th/8th/12th) might’ve suffered bullying to the point where they repress their memories. a lot of their memories of their school years may feel foggy if they were bullied in those years
— also. people with chiron in the 8th house may feel as though they’ve been punished for wanting to experience intimacy. it’s like, the people who were supposed to be the closest to them – for example, their sibling or something – were the ones who hurt them the most. 
— people with mercury-neptune aspects and strong pisces/neptune energy in their birth chart might struggle with only remembering things when they’re right in front of them. you should keep things in your peripheral vision to remind you of reality, especially when it comes to feelings— so that you won’t start getting lost inside your own head. like... keep the letters your friends wrote you by your bedside table so you can read them every time your brain starts convincing you that you’re not loved. keep the gifts you’ve been sent on display in your bedroom wall, or sentimental material things that remind you of past happy experiences.
— earth placements and their thing for asmr... omfg. it’s like they’re always looking for things to up their sensory experience/sensitivity. like, earth signs are the ones most connected to worldly experiences so they feel so soothed with the whole asmr experience: just hearing someone gently whispering or tapping on/scratching things calms them down and helps them fall asleep. they love the tingles it’s heaven for them
— moon-saturn aspects might hold and caress themselves while they sleep because their parents never did. yes i woke up and chose violence <3 your secret is NOT safe with me 💋
— while we’re on the topic of sleeping, a majority of the pisces moons i know need to sleep while hugging something, at least a pillow. they can’t just not hug something while they sleep, it’s very instinctive for them. anyways if any pisces moon needs a pillow to hold, i volunteer as tribute 💋
— virgo placements feel sososo soothed by hearing their cats purr. thinking about how my virgo placement friends are always the ones who send me videos of them petting their cats... and then i get soothed by how soothed they feel. it’s a win win situation, if you have virgo placements it’s hereby your duty to send me a video of you petting your cat while they purr. right now. GO
— people with gemini in the 3rd house might have shaky movements of the hands when other people look at them doing things. very specific i know but the third house rules hands and gemini is a sign that has somewhat of an anxious, twitchy quality to it. on the other hand, people with capricorn in the 3rd house (scorpio risings, using whole signs) have the steadiest hands i’ve ever seen lol their movements ooze confidence, these bitches know how to make you feel as thought they know exactly what they’re doing
— people with venus in the 1st house ft. altering their pics with photoshop and hating posting selfies without filters because they never feel like their appearance is good enough. stop it. you don’t need to always look your best and especially not if your ‘best’ isn’t even what you actually look like. also... don’t even think about making self-deprecative jokes about your appearance. next time i find one of yall saying “ahaha im not bad for a 5 without talent” i’m squishing your head between 2 pieces of toast and calling you an idiot sandwich. you’re BEAUTIFUL 
— having venus in the 3rd house in composite with someone? do you mean calling each other the absolute ugliest nicknames in the most endearing way? 
— leo deals with themes of the ego, and it seems that leo placements often struggle with attracting narcissistic people into their life... leo suns/mercuries can be raised by loud, overbearing, narcissistic parents who see their kid as an extension of themselves and who teach the kid to always be very supportive and caring towards them or else they’ll deny them of words of affirmation-- either by insulting them to shatter their self-esteem or simply never complimenting the kid back. leo moons/mars/venus tend to attract narcissistic partners who only care about serving their own emotional needs and ignore the ones of their partner, and who feed off of their supportive and giving nature. which is why leo placements really need to watch out for being gullible, naïve and dismissing the red flags because my god, you be falling for some shady people. 
— people with personal planets in the 12th house/chart ruler in the 12th house might feel like they can’t let go of their past life— they may dream of memories, people or places from another life. it’s like they can’t detach from it, and even if they can’t directly remember their past life, it’s like they feel it in their bones. also, they might’ve felt... estranged from their family ever since childhood; there may have been feelings of being unable to emotionally connect to their (often, distant) parents, and they might’ve even wondered if they were adopted because of how different they felt to the rest of the family. 
— okay so, a thing that people with saturn in the 3rd house need to look out for is mentally checking out of conversations while they’re still happening. these people can detect when they’re being manipulated really fast and their way of dealing with it can be to immediately shut down, to grow cold and silent and not even bother answering when you’re expected to respond. and, like, that’s great when someone starts screaming at you or being insulting/trying to coerce you into shit, but take notice if you find yourself shutting your loved ones out as soon as they say anything that triggers you. don’t simply detach from them, communicate what’s wrong
— aries placements, ESPECIALLY aries suns and moons, value generosity so much and they get so turned off by stingy ppl who don’t share with others, especially when others need it. like.. if you’re hanging out in a group with them and someone asks for a bite of your food because they have no money and you say no... espect them to never respect you. ever. 
— people with libra placements use soooo many adjectives to describe things. something can’t just be beautiful, it has to be DIVINE and CELESTIAL and INTOXICATING. they can be so expressive god it’s so fcking funny 
— capricorn placements HATE asking others for advice because they think no one knows better than them (and they’re not wrong, lol). when they truly care for someone, they might ask the person for advice simply as a sign that they respect, trust and value their judgement. even if they don’t plan on taking it LMFAO 
— people with mars in a water sign can have this terrible habit of expecting other people to guess what they want. and then they get passive agressive when you don’t instinctively feel what it is they want... and when you ask them “do you want this?”, they go like “FINALLY. i thought you’d never get there”. stop it. i know that you want people to understand you in a way that transcends words, but you can’t expect people to read your mind and then get disappointed when they don’t, thinking “oh if they loved me that much then they would’ve known that i really want chipotle for dinner :(” GIRL WHAT. COMMUNICATE YOUR NEEDS  
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imaginethathaikyuu · 3 years
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How did I find your blog? I was looking for soft Kuroo content on google. And your soft birthday hc’s for him came up. And that’s also how I found tumblr
What was the first story of yours that I read? That Kuroo piece ^
Roughly, how long have I been following this blog? Well I found that piece shortly after it was posted so…. Around the beginning of December 2019 I think. Got a tumblr a few months later and you were the first person I followed (had you in my bookmarks bar before that! (still have you in my bookmarks bar and when I share my screen in classes there are occasionally questions. I ignore them))
What’s something I’ve noticed about you personality wise? You’re really clever and funny. But you’re also sweet. But because you’re clever you have no hesitation in setting up and enforcing your boundaries, and I really admire that strength and confidence.
Have we ever interacted, either by PM, ask, or in the comments? What was my perception of you? YES!!! PM, SOOOOO many asks, comments, and you sent me an ask. And reblogged it. And I cried. A lot. My perception: you’re lovely and I want to h*ld your h*nd ….please.
What’s my favorite story of yours? Oh how to choose. Firstly, I’m a nb, biracial, bisexual. Honey, I’ve never made a choice in my life. But let’s try here. Anything you’ve written for Tsukki. Literally all of it is gold. Fight me. I was going to write “especially [piece title]” but I LITERALLY CANNOT CHOOSE ONE. Your Bokuto nightmare piece. Your Kuroo angsty fight. Your Tendou dealing with S/O with parents who yell piece. Your Kinktobers. Your Futakuchi and Mattsun pieces. And your Terushima pieces. Ugh. I CANNOT CHOOSE. OH AND YOUR STREAMER KENMA!!!!!! OKay just… all of it. I can’t choose. I tried, and I failed, and I’m willing to admit failure.
What’s a story I’d love to see you write? I don’t want to say this… because it hurts me… but I just KNOW you’d write brilliant angst. Some of my fav pieces of yours are pained beginnings with happy endings. That fight with Tsukki after a bad day at work. The pieces I mentioned above (nightmare pieces and fighting pieces and angsty home life ha.. ha.ha.ha.). That Oikawa one where the reader wakes up in bed without him and thinks he left. You write these gorgeous atmospheres and descriptive, visceral feelings, and if you chose to use it for evil…. You could get evil shit done. You’re SO powerful. So I want to read it… but also…. I don’t. I’d love to see you write ABO like you mentioned a while back or just see you explore a cutesy soulmate AU or something. I think you’d be really good at writing an AU where you hear what the other person’s listening too. I feel like you’d be so good at making me feel something for someone who was in another city. (think this would be cute with Tsukki cos he’s headphones boy, OR terushima because I like the dynamic of someone flirty, who clearly cares about looks, falling for someone he can’t see) ANYWAY….
Favorite pairing you write for?/fav reader insert? Tsukishima x reader. It’s my fav self-ship. (but also Mattsun, Bokuto, Oikawa, Tanaka, and Akaashi because you write them SO WELL!!!!)
Have any of your stories helped me through a hard time? Of course. Your self-harm piece came at a time I needed it. Iwaizumi’s in particular saved my life. But also your Tendou dealing with S/O parents who fight… came right when I needed it. Also starting college… was hard.. And reading and rereading your fluff really pulled me through it.
Have any of your stories hit closer to home? YES (see above).
Do I genuinely like your blog, it’s aesthetic or posts? It’s overall feel? It’s content? Yes. The aesthetic is, ngl, a wee bit basic. But I kinda love that. And the feel? It feels like home. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Your blog is my safe space. So, yes, I love. It’s content? YES. OF COURSE. Your personality probably could have kept me here even if your content was kinda shit, but I follow you RELIGIOUSLY because of your content. So yes. I adore.
Is English my first language? Kinda??? I grew up in a trilingual household so I kinda learned three languages at the same time while growing up. But no, I don’t need to translate it in my head. Because English was one of the three.
Anything I want to share? Yes. Please keep being kind to yourself, caring for your mental health, enforcing your boundaries, loving Akaashi, and just generally being you. You’re so lovely as you are, and I hope you continue grow, but never change. Also I’m sorry about all your work stuff…. It literally makes me feel sick. And I hope you find a job where that’s not tolerated, or that your work finds a better way of protecting it’s employees. I know you know this, but none of it is your fault. I just hope things improve. AND I love you… a lot. And I’m so proud of you hitting 9K and you deserve so many more followers because your pieces are just... GORGEOUS. I can’t wait until I’m at Barnes and Noble in a few years and I can pick up a hardback copy of your debut novel. I’m so excited to say “I knew Em Akaashi (which is your legal name as far as I’m concerned) before she was so popular among the masses.”
so ive been trying to figure out the correct and worthy way to reply to this ask since the moment i got it......because its so fucking sweet and kind and amazing and pure and perfect and i just dont know how to use WORDS to explain the way it makes me feel so.......i will just reply in bullet points in regards to every question u answered to make it a lil easier :D
- the fact that u found my blog on google ....... like this may be odd and a very specific thing but before i made this blog i always hoped that 1 day my fanfic would pop up in google searches bc thats ALWAYS how i found fics when i was reading them religiously and i felt so much ENVY!!!!! LIKE I WANTED TO BE THERE I WANTED MY FICS TO B POPULAR ENOUGH TO POP UP ON GOOGLE.....that may sound very selfish but its true......so thats just very cool to me... :]
- u’ve been here for so long omg 🥺🥺🥺🥺 if anyone in ur classes ever asks jus promo my blog like its nbd 
- thats so sweet what 🥺🥺🥺 i try my best to advocate for myself and be confident for myself.....ive spent far too much of my time being silently uncomfortable because i was afraid of pushing someone’s buttons seeming rude.....but NO MORE!!!! i know what upsets me, i know my triggers, i know what i dislike experiencing, and im never gonna let myself be anxious or uncomfortable for someone else’s sake, esp if theyre being rude 2 me. i would say its less strength and confidence and moreso me attempting to take control of my anxiety in the places i can (aka on the Internet) bc i am SICK OF ANXIETY ATTACKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
- BBY no dont CRY!!!! im racking my brain trying to think of who u are i wanna know so bad so i can thank u personally for being the kindest person in the world n so i can send u more asks >:(........MY HAND IS URS TO HOLD!!!!! dont tell akaashi tho 
- OMG my TSUKKI pieces.....hes so hard to write why ;-; thank u so much im so glad u enjoy my works<3333
- NOT ANGST NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!! pained beginnings to happy endings are my specialty.....IMAGINE me writing a sad ending like i CANT!!!!!!!!! ive only done it a few times and it is so Difficult.....YALL ARE SO LUCKY IM NOT EVIL!!!!!! ive had this idea for an angsty akaashi fic that i think about and write in my head every night before falling asleep and it Hurts and i wanna write it but i also can’t make myself :D ABO would be very fun but i genuinely do not know how to explore the concept while making it feel like it’s Written By Me.....u know what i mean? same with soulmate aus, i really dislike writing them because theyre just boring to me like they all feel the same everything’s been done for them.....which is FINE!!! but i write enough cliche stuff as it is HAHA, a long distance type soulmate au could be fun and interesting but ldr’s trigger me bc of a past relationship so </3 but hey maybe someone else could use the idea!!!!!
- gotta love tsukishima <3
- im rlly glad my writing could be there for you friend, one of the biggest reasons i write fanfic (and write the kind of fics i write) is bc i know firsthand how much reading sweet stories abt ur comfort characters can help u through the shittiest times - i just wanna offer ppl some support and happy feelings and love cuz sometimes fanfic is the only time we can find those things (and theres nothing shameful abt that either if anyone bullies u for reading fanfic i will fight them)
- I KNOW MY LAYOUT IS LAZY AND BASIC AS FUCK AND THAT IS BECAUSE I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT LMAOOOO so im glad u think its ok...... like i dont have the patience to create a fancy ass layout that actually works are u KIDDING ME??????? I COULD LITERALLY NEVER plus i kinda like that its just the basic kinda ugly boring default layout like it makes it simple and easy and i feel like it brings focus to the only thing on this blog that i care about which is my writing, i rlly only care about the content here and not aesthetics jdbljdabsdk that blue background will be there til i Die......i adore u more btw 
- WHOA trilingual what the hell ur so cool tell me more 
- you have my word, friend, that i will continue to do all of that so long as you do the same. take care of yourself, be kind to yourself - i know u can do it, ur so kind to others and u deserve to be kind to urself, too so this is the part that genuinely brought me to tears because *sappy dumb shit ahead* ok look ever since i can remember the one and only thing ive wanted to do with my life is become an author ...... dreams of book covers with my name written on them and words in pages written by me and fanart of my characters and going into my local bookstore n seeing my book there....these thoughts all haunt my fucking brain because i want it SO BAD!!!!!!!! so bad that it makes me CRY!!!!!!!! ive never wanted something more and just!!!!!!!!!!!! idk how much u meant that part but holy fuck!!!!!! i hope so bad that one day i can send u a free copy of my book as a thank u for being the person u are. u have all my love friend, every last bit of it <333333333
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EPISODE THREE
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“this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off!” - nash
HOH: Nash UPSIDE DOWN: Joey & Saira NOMINEES: Brianna & Gina POV: Jacob FINAL NOMINEES: Emma & Gina EVICTED: Gina (11-1), Jake (WALK)
ARIA
https://youtu.be/SyHPQkbxxw8
JOEY
WATCH THIS AGE LIKE MILK:
I feel great!!!!! Nash winning means my ass aint going up, I gave her 2 tokens, and she gave me 1, and I feel fantastic heading into this week
SAIRA
i feel okay about nash being hoh, she wasn't my first choice but i don't think im in any danger of being nominated (hopefully haha) im not sure who i WOULD want to be nominated, i just know who i wouldn't want, so as long as they're okay i'm good!
JEV
I'm once again feeling pretty good this week. I've grown pretty close to Nash since nominating her in week 1 and she told me and Nathan we aren't going up so, there's that! She's told me Gina is going up and will be her target which I'm not thrilled about but hopefully Gina can pull some miracle and win POV. I'm a little worried about Emma and Jake too, as they've both said they haven't spoken to her much which is dumb, bc like hello??? its week 3, i feel esp with Jake, I can understand Emma bc Nash keeps leaving her on read but I don't think Jake has even tried much (crying emoji) So hopefully they can ALSO pull something out
JAKE
FUCK MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i hate everyone in this game t b h. why can't people just follow with a plan and go through with it like it aint that hard to put your chips on one person from your alliance so youre all safe like........ i dont think these ppl understand strategy and it's TIRING. i frankly am over people relying on their friendships to get themselves through another week bc fucking nash won an alliance-based hoh comp. now we have to deal w this fucking friend group running the house another week. i don't know if i'm safe i'm honestly probably going to be put up??? even tho nash is the one that CONSTANTLY ignores my PMs even tho ive given her paragraphs to respond to... she's gonna do whatever her little friends want her to do. i mean that's what she literally said to me. i was like pls don't nom me <3 and she was like "im not making any promises im just doing whatever the house wants me to do" like girl............ lkjghklsdfjhg what kind of dumbass bullshit response was that. just tell me you're putting me up or you're not. youre a big girl you can make your own fucking decisions.
i give nash what i would give any hoh if they won and that is "i'd never ever nominate you it's never even crossed my mind" and hoping that's enough to make her wanna keep me. she might think im not going after her but, if she's smart, she'll send me out the door this week before i can retaliate. 
im super super worried that jacob will be like oh jev n jake aligned in BBHOS9 u should put them up together since jev nominated you week 1. like i feel like she'd do ANYTHING jacob tells her at this point cuz shes just another one of his sheep so like hoping im good w jacob but he's such a wildcard idfk
at this point im just hoping me or emma don't get put up and if we do there will be a veto to be won and a nash/jacob to come after next so...... period
ARIA
yall i feel so fucking cracked and tired of everything but itS FINE!!! I got this easy peasy!! Im not going to always feel motivated but im doing my best and thats valid baby!!! So lets jump in, first off lets start with a random information dump of things i've collected
-jacob has talked about me w/ nicholas during pasio
-monty and jacob have a connection ( i dont even remember how)
-nathan nash (maybe jacob) obviously tight lmao
-joey monty close
-Jake made a counter alliance to Jacob's (actually joshes) alliance made of me gina saira emma and josh
-josh emma me alliance
-JOEY RECORDS CALLS
-Jake is wary of nathan (but also thinks hes cute ugh)
-told jake im wary of pasio peeps so he might nom them
-Jacob alliance STILL isnt created
-called with josh and told him that jacob is wary that the alliance isnt made yet
-jacob josh have a pregame
-told josh, saira and nick have a pregame
-josh kiki close
-josh thinks saira is a social threat 
-josh prefers jev over nathan
-told monty to talk to jake more
-told joshua jacob is the most connected person
-got back to nash gina doesnt like her
-jacob kiki nash confirmed trio alliance
-nash told jev gina is the target (jev then told jake)
-josh thought jacob was the original maker of the alliance
-jake thinks jacob/josh are snakes
-jake also thinks jacob-josh-nash-kiki-bri-nick-nathan are an alliance
-josh wants to play the middle w/ me :uwu:
 So from here I want to get into how my ideal week will go and how it will realistically go. IDEALLY Nash noms jev and josh with them not winning veto and the house gets rid of a utr social threat but realistically its gonne be gina and jake with gina going bc she doesnt talk to anyone of have any motivation for this game (I LITERALLY WROTE HER A PARAGRAPH TO SEND TO NASH TO NOT BE NOMINATED AND SHE GOES "hmm idk maybe ill send it" LIKE????) 
Okay the other thing im freaking out about is bc i feel like theres tension between me Jacob Josh and Jake and im not sure what it is about. I mean i kinda do but im missing key components. The whole situation just doesn't sit right with me at all and I feel very at odds with them in a weird kinda way. I've explained this so many times but i have such a bad feeling that josh leaked the janelle alliance to jacob and is more with him than me and now josh is setting these two sides against each other and i just heard from him that nash isnt nomming him so now im really uncomfy ughhhh i have such a bad feeling and i really need to work on people like jev saira monty to make sure i have people behind me i can fall back on, but also im getting the vibe jake really really trusts me which is great because i want to go far with him as well, unless hes just misting me SUPER hard ughhh
god i just have such a bad feeling about this week buts its fINE totally fine ill work it out eventually,,,but now its trust ranking time yay
1.Gina (youre so inactive i adore you!)
2.Joshua (kid GANG!!! thank you for trusting me sometimes <3)
3.Jake (hes a crackhead but hes my crackhead)
VERY BIG GAP
4.Emma (shes chilling what a lovely gal)
5.Monty (better inactive than be active and a threat)
6.Nathan (youre kinda sketchy but hes like a funky older brother)
7.Josh (youre at the center of a balancing act i wonder if u can keep it up)
8.Nick (they always give such an honest vibe,,,,,i dont trust it)
9.Brianna (shes so sweet but the sweetest angels make the fiercest demons)
10.Jev(,,,,your on slightly thicker ice than joey but combined with a little more charisma)
ANOTHER GAP WOOT WOOT
11.Joey (youre on THIN fucking ice buddy,,,,please be more open w/ me)
12.Saira (im begging for u to talk game to me,,, but also since we havent talked u cant snake me yet)
13. Jacob (idk ily sm but youre so fcking connected and idk if i reached ur inner circle yet)
14. Kiki (my favorite furry)
15.Nash (please talk to me im begging ill do anything please plsease plaease plae-)
So update ive been talking around and wow this game loves looking at my allies and kicking them in the kneecaps while spitting in their eyes ugh. So nash is probably leaning towards nomming jake and Gina with gina as the target (really weird that jake is nommed makes me think jacob had some influence there) but in that scenario best case is that veto is used and anyone but josh goes up and that person leaves easy fucking peasy!! Anyway i just talked with josh and apparently jacob was the one who came up with the alliance idea which is interesting bc he tried to pin it on josh. Anyways not to totally contradict my initial rant but me and josh had a really good chat where we're kinda in the same position between two groups (the og alliance and janelle) and we dont know if we should make the og alliance and with who bc of janelle so we're struggling to see whats the correct move from here....or maybe josh is completely misting me but i fucking hope not ugh- either way im surviving this week and thats that!!
JEV
I'm realising that I'm getting myself into a pretty tight position since I have firm alliances with Emma & Jake and Nash & Nathan, as well as being extremely close to Josh C, which could prove difficult for me down the line, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
KIKI
https://youtu.be/6cn8xUFWqhA
BRIANNA
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1XvZzg3dTEZ89VeFbG3bxk4JFNtr7Ixm0/view?usp=sharing 
i had to use google drive bc it wouldn't take my file on youtube :((((
JEV
So right now I've somehow accidentally wriggled my way into conspiring with Nash on how best to take Gina out, which is so dumb of me because I don't really want to see Gina leave this week, but at the same time I'm having to fight Nash's decision because she wants to put Emma up beside her and... I can't let that happen because I'm worried Emma would leave over Gina
JEV
So I'm speaking to Nash, taking the heat off of Emma by telling her I feel she could be a number for me/her/Nathan down the line, and now I'm pushing for Brianna to go up since Nash wants someone who 100% wouldn't leave over Gina and I'm thinking like... WHO would vote to evict Brianna, but at the same time I'm feeling super terrible about it because Brianna is a literal angel
JEV
Wow a lot going on so I'm trying to update as best I can, Nash is saying she's going to randomise for who goes to the upside down so I'm having to encourage her not to include me or Nathan in the randomisation just incase she needs us for strategising but REALLY its so I can stay and hang around and try my best to keep Emma from touching the block at all this week.
NASH
sorry for nominating women i didnt mean it.
EMMA
If i am being honest the more this game goes by i get so unmotivated and its only week 3 i suck because well in bbgames like galar and almia i mostly played from the bottom now im like alright i kinda want to fuck up my game for fun but kinda pisses me off a bit that i almost could of been nominated if it wasnt for jev but that pisses me off so much i tried talking to nash but i get left on read i dont take things 100x personal unless if somebody is being mean like laughing etc but knowing that i would be on the block over brianna when i did try talking to nash its still hurts a little but if somebody like gina wins veto if i get on the block it issss what it isss i guess but i played on the bottom way to many times maybe i can do this??
JEV
So my efforts worked and Brianna went up instead of Emma, now I've just gotta hope neither of the noms win POV/that the POV isn't used so I don't have to throw someone elses name out there to Nash :flushed:
JOSH
hello ladies and gays. straights aren't welcome here.
today, we are feeling GOOD because the person we nominated just a few days ago won power and STILL didn't nominate me. is that iconnery or what? i was honestly ready for my ass to be TOAST but i did approach nash before they won HOH and had a conversation about where we stood and they said i would be OKAY this week bc we did start talking. we love to see it, yes we do!
the nominees this week are gina and brianna and.. even though i'm in two different alliances with both of them, i'm not mad at either of them going up. i don't REALLY talk with either and i'd be happy to see either one of them go. the tricky part will be figuring out WHO to vote when the time comes, but we have a POV to happen before we get there. we'll SEE.
if i had to choose, i'd probably send brianna home simply because i find her a bit CHAOTIC where i feel like gina isn't really going to cause a lot of waves with me. she's much more quiet whereas brianna is more likely to be able to pick herself back up.
some other fun events going on:
jake was NOT happy about nash winning and thought he was going to get nominated because of it. he was about to RIP nash a new one and is really brewing with how much he hates them. MAKES ME LAUGH A LIL BECAUSE IT WAS SO UNWARRANTED BUT NEVERTHELESS, it's something to note that jake does NOT like nash.
i think aria is my number one right now bc we get along really well and have very similar opinions. i'm really open with how i talk to her so i'm HOPING she's not spilling everything i say to someone else but i don't think she WOULD? i dunno. i love her energy and i'm hoping we can SLICE AND DICE together in the middle.
my strategy is to take my HOH under my belt and take a step back for a minute while my two alliances (one: jake, aria, gina, emma, saira, me & two: jacob, aria, brianna, kiki, me) get picked off back and forth. i'm going to see if i can craft a narrative for them to go after each other but we'll SEE. there are a lot of people in the middle i enjoy a lot more than some of the people in my alliances so IDK. i feel like some people got thrown into these alliances that i did NOT want but they were kind of forced in so i don't trust it. and i think people KNOW because i'm not very chatty abt it in the chats (and i haven't even made one of the chats. am i supposed to? idk)
anyways that's all for now x 
ARIA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp71zzR-wgE
someone help
JAKE
https://voca.ro/g2ZQWs9x8du
JEV
Not miss Nash coming to me asking how I'd feel about being renom :flushed:
JEV
So I literally just woke up from a sleep and in the space of 30 minutes have had to talk Nash out of renomming me, Emma or Jake since we've just made an alliance together so I warned her that probably wouldn't work out for us in the long run. We narrowed it down and she shortlisted Aria, Josh C, Monty & Nick, and I have spun her to try and get her to nominate Aria, because 1. I don't wanna see Josh C go up and 2. like with Brianna I feel nobody here would vote to evict Aria, and Nash wants Gina GONE (crying emoji) so I feel this was the only logical renom to suggest.
JEV
The conversation has turned back to Emma and I just really don't wanna let that happen because I do feel like she'd leave over Gina. Part of me is saying not to stick my neck out too much to save Emma but at the same time she's my number 1 in this game and I hope she'd return the favour if she was in my position.
NASH
this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off! 
ARIA
Well,,,, FBSFJDF I feel like im making so many of these but honestly this game changes everyday so please dont be too annoyed by me uwu, the mood swing i had just this DAY was insane so lets begin w/ the general info-
IN TIME LINE ORDER
-Jev told jake that something about noms but acted dumb when I asked
-Gina/Joshua/Aria alliance created!!
-Saira and Josh are close
- VIDEO DR GOES HERE
-Jake spills Emma-Jev-Nathan-Nash-Jake alliance with Emma/Jev/Jake being a trio as well= Jev created the alliance
-Jev prefers gina out
-jake doesnt believe in screenshots or recording calls
-Jev and Jake are close
-Jev/Jacob/Jake all played together before
-I leaked Bri's backups to Jake as well as Jacob's trio with Nash and Kiki
-nash almost backdoored jev bc he wasnt responding to her
-jev was the reason i was almost otb
-I WAS ALMOST OTB
-Josh AND Jacob both want Jake out
-Bri thinks nash's comp ability is scary
-Nash and Nick are close 
-Jacob nervous about Bri's backup leaking
-Jacob barely talks w/ saira and monty
-made a final three w/ jacob josh called malibu
So now im debating whether its morally okay for me to analyze what happened in the living room in a game sense. FBSdffan So lets run down things in chronological order and I might mention my thoughts if they arent too controversial, Nathan leaks the alliance with jev/nash/jake/emma. Eventually emma says 'i wanna know who put these thoughts in the hohs head" and nick starts to shut the discussion down which is an interesting contrast to their earlier attitude where they were very for the drama continuing, which leads me to begin they had some sort of hand in it. Nathan goes on to say he likes nash on a personal lvl which jake analyzes as a nod to a friendgroup and a mini confrontation between nathan and jake occur. I believe that part was just a misunderstanding on both parties account. Then happy discussion until Jake calls nash out for being in the diary session for too long which leads to a discussion of house guests over analyzing production and using that as a strategy which is ultimately unfair and also at this time I believe nash was going through itTM leading to their friends to be slightly defensive on their behalf (which is valid) and i after rereading things i really hope that they're okay, ultimately this leads up to frustration on Jake's part and his ultimate quit. 
I mean where do i go from here? I have the Bri's angels but that did get leaked to Emma on Jake's way out so i need to figure some way to micromanage that where i think im gonna make a emma jev alliance and work with them as a trio in the future (if gina goes) but rn i feel like this force of energy that is Bri's backups is gonna body for a bit but i think theyre gonna throw hoh leading me jev or emma to step up and body a bit. Like i think i might actually win hoh and nom nash and monty with a nick potential renom bc im BORED and nash continuing to skate by without even talking to me is not valid, and monty is so not here its like??? HEWWO??? but idk thats making big moves i may just chill a bit for now but i dont want jev and emma being targeted in the future bc theyre gonna be numbers for me and thats on PEWIOD!
HOST WEEKLY CAST ASSESSMENT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L25lY813N1k&list=PLFEwPPy8j010XXwntq80VSU0qLNTNpSIN&index=4&t=0s
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isaacathom · 7 years
Text
so theeennnn the woman starts interacting w/ more villagers the more time she spends and she starts becoming real good friends with some of them. and because her ‘master’ thinks shes trustworthy and stuff, he’s not strict, and she sometimes gets free time to just hang out with these friends shes made. and the survivor, from that attack, is really pissed that shes basically just a regular worker as opposed to a ‘proper slave’, angry that he’s being lenient and that she’s just been accepted.
so what the guy does, is he gathers evidence of her ‘slacking off’, even gets some testimonies from people who don’t know that her master allowed it and shit, and he peeps on her hanging out with one of the ladies from the village and being real close to her. and he brings it before their council, claiming she’s fucking around instead of atoning for the misdeeds. so they bring everyone together, and it doesnt even go far, because the second in command steps forward and goes ‘listen yall, this is my fault, ive been lenient in her work and she’s been permitted time off to relax, and she’s been using said time to make friends. if this set up displeases the council, i will alter it immediately and she will be reigned in. i am at fault, not her’
and the council accepts it, her schedule is changed to minimise that free time spent on the town, and the survivor is FURIOUS, because the punishment deflected off the woman and punished that guy instead, and thats not what he wanted. so he’s gotta find something else.
the end goal would be to provoke her into demonstrating her goddamn ~magic hands~ and proving beyond a shadow of a doubt in anyones mind that she definitely did the murder, which would have her ostracised instead of welcomed and would ruin her good status with the second in command. after all, his good treatment of her mostly came as him believing her to be innocent and non-complicit in the attack. if the survivor can prove that she has the ability, then she’ll lose the good status. but i think going from the aforementioned slacker charge to bringing back the murder is..... a bit.... a bit high. theres gotta be a middle ground.
but while i think that up, the provocation. itd be tough, because shes a fairly collected sort, and quick to resort to humour or to straight up disappear as soon as stuff gets tough on her. so he’d have to get her in a place she cant leave, and a very public place at that in order to ensure he’s not seen as a guy with a vendetta, and he’d have to provoke her. all i can imagine that’d really provoke her would be a suggestion that she’s fucking the second in command, because anyone would be insulted at the suggestion that their status comes from just shagging a guy. idk if that’d tilt her so hard she almost goes murderer, if anything she’d just be :||| excuse me, sir, do you want the chicken or not. like customer service or smth.
if it was long term, like its a long night and he keeps going, it could hit her by the end, especially if she cant easily access the second in command and get him to like. switch her out or something. she’s stuck dealing with him chipping away. maybe the shag suggestion comes at the end and its what finally tips her over. at that point, her eyes would go white and she’d go ‘excuse me’ in a very creepy voice and the survivor would suddenly realise that this isnt actually exactly what he wanted. see, what HE’S thinking is that he can provoke her into doing something she’s not allowed to do. and he’s done that, he’s succeeded, but said thing is an attempt to stuff his head into a christmas turkey with fucking telekinesis. what happens in the end is he stammers out a repeat of what he just said, she steps forward and white light surrounds her hand, he starts screaming in absolute fucking terror and someone tackles her to the ground to prevent her from hurting anyone. after all, everyone knows about the attack. everyone knows how it was described, they all heard what that survivor said, about how a mysterious lady summoned white light in her hands and shots holes through people. and they see the lady that they were told did it but, on reflection of character, really didnt buy that, and they see her summon white light, and it clicks in for EVERYONE. every single person in that room, excusing perhaps children and The Blind, is that she absolutely did it.
so following that display, she’s put back in the slave quarters and its a fucking disaster, dude. like shes distraught. she’s fucked it up. she’s maintained that, though she has ~magic hands~ and could have been in the area at the time and encountered the hunters, she’s ALWAYS believed that she could never have killed them. not with intent, absolutely not. if she did do it, it wouldve been as a result of her being so exhausted that she didnt understand what she’d done. but never, at no point, did she genuinely believe or know that she did it. but her almost fucking up the survivor, it proves to her (and everyone else) that she did. she now has no excuse. she cant reason with it. everything adds up. magic hands, intent to do harm, it all tracks, she had the power and the ability to do it, and if thats the case, how can she say she didnt do it????
at that point, the second in command would need to talk to her, but she wouldnt talk. she’s just silent, head in hands, and nothing he can do can convince her to just explain what happened. and he has to come before the council, or specifically the guy he’s the right hand of, and explain that. it gets really weird. the thing is, her actions imply an intent and attempt to reoffend, which is grounds for banishment. the second in command really doesnt want to do this, because hes positive that if she would just talk to him, he could save her from that, and he still thinks that maybe theres a misunderstanding. because at this point, she’s been in this town for over a year, and she’s been so good up till that point, this doesnt add up to him, there must be more to it.
the only way to really clear her name of that last debacle and keep her in town is to prove it wasnt premeditated. if they can prove she was provoked, they can get her. the problem is, the people who wouldve been close enough to hear all the survivors comments were friends of his, and wouldve agreed with it, thought it fun and not seen his game. they though she snapped as a result of a few harmless comments and that it wasnt a deliberate provocation by him. being able to prove that he provoked her deliberately would clear her. but shes the only one who can prove it, and aside from not talking, its difficult to take the word of the accused on its own. the second in command could stand as a character witness, to speak on her good name, and there are many who could, but equally many who saw what she did and wont. the second in commands word will not stand. everyone thinks that shes corrupted him in some way. before the display, they probably all thought that, but in a vaguely positive way. he’d become a better leader, prime to become the High Council Guy, with her involvement. if there was corruption, it was generally well meant and produced a positive result for all (except the survivor and his family, ofc)
the only OTHER way to really clear her name is to find who actually DID the murder. if they can prove she didnt kill the hunters, then she didnt reoffend, and furthermore would no longer be a slave, or would have her ‘term’ drastically shortened. problem is, beyond the fact that noone knows anyone else would could match the picture of the killer, is that i dont actually know if she did it or not. i like the idea of keeping it ambiguous. proving that she could, but also proving through her general character that she couldnt, making a conundrum for ‘reader’ and characters as to whether she did or not.
god, idk. three clearing options - prove he provoked her into ‘reoffending’ at the party or whatever, prove she didnt do the murder in the firstplace, OR even prove that he and the hunters provoked her in the initial attack, which would subsequently downgrade the initial offence into an act of self defence, which would carry different connotations. OOH, and there’d be a way to do it, sorta, if we bring the initial attack a lot closer to when she collapses in town. like, a day or so. as in, the attack happens and the hunters are all brought back to town in their awful state. the survivor, who wasnt actually injured, explains what he saw. the next day, a woman matching his description of the attacked collapses badly injured in the town. when questioned, she has no recollection of ever meeting the hunters, and thus cannot prove she did or did not kill them. coincidental evidence is still strong. but theres the problem - she’s very badly injured with fresh wounds. were they received in the altercation? but the survivor claims the woman just appeared and attacked them, and that all they could do was run and hide until she left. no blows landed on her, he claims, as all the hunters lowered their weapons once they saw she was human, and wouldnt have had time to raise them for an attack.
so you layer that, and you get the idea that perhaps the hunters attacked this exhausted woman and she snapped, as she did in the ‘party’, and retaliated with ~magic hands~. but because she doesnt actually remember ever meeting the hunters, she cant prove that, hence being found guilty of murder and becoming a slave.
so then, if the second in command really wants to clear her name, and she wont talk to him, and no close witnesses would implicate the survivor as the unquestioned provoker in the display, he needs to prove she committed the murders in an act of self defence. there would be evidence, without doubt. her wounds wouldve been documented, as would those of the hunters and the locations they were found. possibly if the second in command went the location, he could find a weapon coated in blood that implicates one of the hunters as having landed a blow on her. but a) thats a bit deus ex and b) itd be difficult to place the blow as being before or after she went all ~Avatar State~ on the hunters, which means it wouldnt be useful. thats the issue here. if its been a long time since the attack, a year like a said, itd be really difficult to confirm whether she did it when the only witness is the Survivor, who’s a cunt. if she remembered the incident, and could explain it, the whole mess wouldve been fixed, but her suddenly remembering the attack after a year and when shes in trouble would look /real/ suspicious, and wouldnt be taken seriously at all.
whoops written myself into a detective hole here. fuck. this is why all my dr fan stories fell through, yall. the fucks a murder mystery.
unless like. ok. heres an idea. so the woman is travelling with someone else the whole time (for what reason? she doesnt explain, but shes clearly a foreigner so mm), and theyre both exhausted and probably vaguely headed for the town to rest and recuperate. on their way, theyre encountered by the hunters. things lead to things, probably nasty, and the travelling partner is killed by the hunters. they know theyre humans, and the Survivor’s mention of ‘putting their weapons down’ is probably true, as of when they first encountered the women. but as i said, shit leads to shit, the traveller is murdered, and The Woman loses her fucking mind. of course, at this point, the hunters all have their weapons drawn, with the possible exception of the survivor, because itd make some sense in a sec. so the hunters, w/ their weapons drawn, see the woman go all Avatar and attack her, in response to which she fucking destroys them. at that point, possibly leaving the Survivor due to him not participating in the murder of her friend. the woman promptly flees the scene, screaming bloody murder. this is what, at least initially, piques the interest of any villagers nearby, because her yells probably echo through the forest.
The survivor thinks fast. his friends were just slain in front of him. theres a dead woman in front of him, who his friends just murdered. what does he do? chucks the woman in a fucking ditch, probably. and because investigators have no reason to look in the ditch, they dont. the womans body remains. because the Survivors now covered in shit, he goes and starts to drag one of his friends back to town, and now he starts yelling for help. the story is set. he and his friends were set upon by a wild woman and slaughtered. he alone survives, covered in cuts and scratches from the undergrowth and trees and covered in the blood of his friends. when the woman subsequently turns up in town, blood covered and fatigued, her wounds are coincidental. she doesnt remember their encounter. she has no reason to inherently distrust what the Survivor says. all she knows is that she was travelling with someone, who now isnt there, and she has to believe that in their exhaustion and injuries they were separated. she has no idea.
and the thing w/ the survivor not killing the friend comes up. because the Woman has ZERO reason to feel inherent hatred towards him. if she saw the hunters’ bodies, which she didnt, she mightve had a gut reaction, but she has no gut reaction of the violent or upset kind towards the Survivor, because he didnt do it. she doesnt hate him. so for the whole time shes in the village, she treats her vague sense of deja vu towards his face as just a coincidence and moves on. ofc she develops hatred to him, as hes a Cunt, but she doesnt have it inherently. she clearly doesnt, because she let him live when she slew his friends.
so THEN what happens is that, in the lead up to another trial of her, the second in command explores the area in which the attack happens, and discovers the partly preserved body of her friend in the ditch. its brought back to town for investigation, because, yknow, a dead fucking body covered in weapon wounds, theres foul play. they briefly postpone the Woman’s trial in order to investigate this fresh case, and she could be found with shit on her that is identifiable as either the hunters’ or the Survivors, implicating him. as that shit mounts and stuff looks sus, the second in command manages to convince the council to allow him to bring the Woman to see the corpse. then she fucking reacts, because she immediately recognises it as her friend, and she probably almost goes avatar again before being restrained and escorted out. NOW she’ll talk. thing is, she still has 0 recollection of the night of the attack. her memory doesnt miraculously reappear on that front. that whole night doesnt exist. probably a trauma thing but also, try and remember a specific random day from over a year ago, good luck buddy.
but she’d now be able to explain proper what happened on the day of The Display, and theyd be able to piece a lot of stuff together and come to a conclusion that she and her friend were attacked by the hunters and that she retaliated after they killed her friend, which would allow to sorta slot under an act of self defence (or a similar, not fuckig murder charge, you feel me), thus allowing her sentence to be drastically shortened, and for a charge of murder (or conspiracy to murder, or culpability, or like, what... accessory! accessory to murder) to be laid upon the Survivor and posthumously upon the hunters.
fuck. thatd work. i guess? especially if the element of the dead woman is established. mentioned when the woman wakes up in a panic in the home of a king soul, asking if theyve seen her and if she was with her, and being forced to weakly concede that she doesnt remember having seen her recently due to her exhaustion blacking out many of her days. then you can bring it up later, when the second in command gets closer and more curious about her and asks about how she came to be in the village, and she’d mention her travelling partner and how she wished she knew where she was. then, the body. BAM. fuck! rule of threes, motherfuckers, i know how to construct a narrative! fuck me
tl;dr the Survivor tries a few times to get the Woman thrown out, and eventually succeeds in almost being attacked and killed by her. in an effort to clear her name (because hes a naive good soul who cant combine the image of a murderer with the general way this woman has acted since her arrival), her master, the Second in Command, does a sweep of the area in which the survivor was attacked and discovers the partly preserved corpse of a woman, who was murdered by the Hunters, prompting their deaths at the hands of The Woman.
fuck me down
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