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#just makes ppl feel so comfortable around her
edains · 2 months
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Geth Dreadnought: Ashley & Tali reunion
Ashley Williams's Andromeda Armory (LE3)
Subtle Faces for Quarians (and Tali) - LE3
Morning's Tintable Armors for Femshep LE3
Morning's Versatile Hairstyles for Femshep LE3
New Armors for Femshep LE3 (Breather)
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schmweed · 3 months
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#David Tennant#Alec Hardy#Ellie Miller#Broadchurch#my gifs#Yes they're talking about something extremely serious.#But can you see soft way his eyes tenderly trace her eyes and just rest on her face like it's the best thing he could look at?#He spends so long just looking at her -- and she is so mindful of his comfort level and RARELY looks back when he's looking at her.#If he's looking at her she's always looking ahead or down or away.#Except if she needs to hold his gaze to get a message across. Like go make some tea. Or if they're both worried.#This reminds me -- she is so naturally instinctively understanding of him#We rarely hear her addressing him by name after the rant that falls out of him when he has dinner at her place in S1.#She gets that simply looking at someone while you're talking to them is enough. And you don't need to tack on their name on top of that.#Which astounded me actually! I wondered if Chris Chibnall had spent some time around an autistic person!#Because I feel EXACTLY like Alec does abt names! I hate names. I hate using them. It's so unnecessary.#I'm not as outspoken as him though so I use them when I can't get out of it. But I hate it and I hate ppl using my name.#That scene was ASTOUNDING I'm telling you -- it took my breath away to find my very specific struggle onscreen!#Anyway. Yeah. She doesn't bug him or insist even though to her it's second nature.#I bet you she's very good at coming up with pet names -- another thing my autistic brain shrieks at and sth I suspect Alec finds impossible#Oh Ellie -- beautiful beautiful adorable strong wronged Ellie!#Wronged by everyone except him <3#Well and a few others -- Mark was kind to her despite his pain. Brian never treated her badly that we know of.#I will always love them for that.#I wish Jack had survived -- I think he would've been kind too. Maybe she would've hidden in his store when it got too much.
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yayforocs · 3 months
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👉👈 so @silverskye13 i saw this and..............
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had to make an aron helsmet!!!!!! this was really hecking fun to think about actually like what she'd be like n design (which. is a poke at the rp server she was from actually) and also made me sit down and think more on my other minecraft ocs i have sittin around and why they ended up getting redesigns lkdsfh BUT YEAH i!!!!!!!! aron!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#what do i. tag this as. sdklfjslk#i mean ig since it's like??? she's a concept from it i should???#redstone and skulk#aron#a lotta the stuff aron goes through in her character arc in the rps has to do with like. she has her stuff that she's comfortable doing#and stuff that she's not#and after trying and trying and trying to go outside her comfort zone and help ppl around her in a Better Way#feels like she's just not good at it and should give up and go back to what she was doing before#-only to find out through A Lot Of Events that no she actually was learning even tho she didn't realize it and she was getting better#and she was actually helping#and also. it was. kind of impossible for her to go back anyway. jlsdf.#sO i thought her helsmet would be more of the 'stick with what i know and don't leave that' kinda thing!!!#leaning into her minecraft roots; she was originally a redstoner/demolitionist (i mean she's still a demo but)#so her helsmet would- if following that idea- be Really Hecking Good at redstone#but only stick to redstone bc No I'm Not Trying Anything Else#also aron had a lot of problems trusting people she shouldn't and it really bit her back so there's that aspect too!!!#...also is it just me or does this pic feel very Camish like i don't know what it is about the style bc i tried smth different#and when i finished i looked at it and went 'huh. this looks like camish drew it.'#I WILL ALSO!! make more!! of my other minecrafters!!! i just underestimated how much thought i would be putting into making helsmets sdlkfj#but they are bouncing around in my brain!!! and i will draw them once i can get them to stay still long enough to realize what they are!!!
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oscill4te · 10 days
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Why does it simutaneously feel so good and bad to avoid family
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tinyfantasminha · 1 year
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Okay I really didn't want to bring attention to this but I am BEYOND enraged.
Yes we are all aware about Ugi's tracing and awful takes and tbh I couldn't care less about this pathetic tracer, but I just got sent an anon submission on her personal info and address and I'm like?!?! What the fuck?!
I cannot stress enough about how doxxing and other kinds of harassment absolutely enrage and disgust me. I just cannot believe that some people would resort to literal CRIMINAL ACTIONS just to have a ''gotcha'' moment and feel their ego stroken for ''giving a problematic person what they deserve''. I've already blocked people solely because their takes and opinions on another person are disturbingly violent, even if the person they're talking about is somebody I hate as well.
It baffles me that some people (most of the time teenagers/young adults, worringly.) really do believe they have the moral ground when they're the ones showing violent, harassing, disturbing and sometimes criminal behaviour towards the person they claim is the problematic one. The lack of emotional intelligence in young people to deal with things that upset them on the internet nowadays is horrifying.
It doesn't matter how much you think a person ''deserves'' it, your disgusting fascist behaviour is NEVER justified. Doxxing isn't justified, harassment isn't justified, sending death threats is NOT, EVER, JUSTIFIED.
If you in any way condone these actions or has participated in it, get your miserable ass OUT. OF. MY BLOG. I don't want you here.
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toastsnaffler · 3 months
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everyone say thank u to my roommate for going to visit her parents this weekend so I can jack it loud and nasty 🙏
#i love her but there are some benefits to having the flat to myself.... love getting to wander around in just my boxers + a tshirt too#things i could do while she was still here if i wasnt a pussy 🙄#jk itd just make her uncomfortable and im too respectful for that#having a lowkey crush on her is an endless comedy to me bc we would be so woefully incompatible romantically#and also sexually.. historically ive only ever stone topped bc ive never been comfortable enough w anyone to let them fuck me#despite very much Not being stone or exclusively a top. and i think shes some form of sex repulsed anyway so like. sits there dead silence#and also shes so in love with her other friends and i showed up late to that party.... ive been feeling kinda guilty lately bc ik-#she misses them a lot and wishes we'd be able to stay roommates w them too. and im a pretty poor replacement for them tbh#and i love spending time with her but whenever i do i feel kinda painfully aware im not them like i could never fill that space#and asking to hang out more with her always feels like im taking away from time she could be talking to them. or even being alone ik she-#likes her own company and i get that a lot too so its chill but ahh.. man#i dont mean this in a bitter or jealous way at all like theyre all such sweet ppl i couldnt ever hold it against them#theyre kind of a 3 headed cerberus type situation and im like. the stray puppy they found on the side of the road#theres nothing they can do differently i was just born to be alienated from other ppl forever until i die. and someday i hope ill-#finally get used to it and accept i wont ever feel like im enough for anyone else or feel like anything else is enough for me#old wounds healed over 5082 times that still hurt to touch but i cant help pressing my fingers into them anyway bc its a familiar pain etc#anyway lost where i was going with this its just been on my mind again recently. i hate to be pitied i hate to feel like im only included-#bc they didnt want me to feel left out i hate feeling like a shoddy secondhand stand-in and its been a lot of that lately#also been a little annoyed bc sometimes it feels like shes trying to micromanage my social life and girl. we're not close enough for that#im sure its well intentioned but im not part of what they have going on i cant compete in that ring so dont try to push me into it..#ahhh. its all ok tho one of the guys is coming to visit next month which will be rly fun but ill try to give them some space too#its good at least im doing this processing now bc group situations can be spike traps of triggers for me sometimes#regardless of how good friends i am w ppl and ive already had a wobble a few weeks ago w how i cope and i dont want it to become a#fully fledged regular issue again bc its so hard to crawl back out of that pit. anyway losing coherence here im gonna stop rambling#and go make myself an early dinner and then back to drawing........#sorry for long tags if ur reading this blows u a kiss but go find a better use of ur time girl!!#.diaries
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nerosdayinanime · 7 months
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kny x tokyo ghoul au
was thinking abt following tokyo ghoul's storyline and making nezuko get organ donor ghoul-ified like kaneki but on second thought that seems a bit boring. the slayer marks (tanjiro's specifically- that one frame in the red light district arc where he looks like hes absolutely lost it) made me think of the sort of insanity thing with centipede kaneki when he started eating ghouls. (nezuko's bout of literally losing control of herself beating daki is probably a bit closer tho) dont know what to do with that. tanjiro being human and having to keep nezuko safe with her new life as a half-ghoul is pretty cool but i dont know. could make it different
#sakonji as coffee shop owner and sabito & giyuu as workers and the fox squad being the underground Good Ghouls makes me kick my feet#goth/alt vibe makomo as the mask maker MWAH and sabito & giyuu playing as regular college kids. giyuu 'eating' out with friends and#sabito drive-by eating his food before booking it (Sabito-! you bastard!) and later when theyre alone giyuu holding his hair back#(you should stop eating my food all the time..) ((im fine- as long as it makes it easier on you))#tanjiro working as a server & nezuko more as#.#i forgot hanae-san also voiced Kaneki#what the fuck is it with him and voicing the main characters of anime about the morality of cannibalism#its not much but its weird that its happened twice#i completely fucking forgot abt that and here i am literally putting tanjiro in his place#as i was saying nezuko has a 'job' there but shes not actually employed or forced to work she just hangs around in uniform like her brother#while tanjiro's the one thats employed. shes the cute mascot of the place and sabito gets hype with her and it entertains ppl#sabito nezuko interactions beloved<3 she makes him go big brother mode#giyuu's behind the counter helping sakonji make coffee so he doesnt have to interact with people (as much)#something something also half-ghoul genya being an antagonist at first until tanjiro & nezuko's bond makes him change his mind#and he becomes the newest employee at the coffee shop. que him and sabito bickering at eachother like children and tanjiro being so#sweetfaced and genuinely kind to him & giyuu being a chill comforting presence he can go to#confides in them his fear about his brother and the guilt he feels for being around them bc it puts them in danger#mm#sweet au. great playing field to ruin absolutely everyone#i should rewatch/read tokyo ghoul its been almost a year i think#do that then decide how i want the au to play out if i want it to try to follow that storyline or if i should do some worldbuilding fuckery#of my own instead to completely change how nezuko & genya's half-ghoulness would happen#i remember i dropped tokyo ghoulre but i dont remember why. didnt bother after that Hide scene in the anime but i dont remember y the manga#i was listening to Seijatachi for writing vibes and stared a bit too long at the album image i put#kny#tokyo ghoul#kamado tanjiro#kamado nezuko#kny x tokyo ghoul au
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pepprs · 2 years
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ok mutuals i know this is cringe i am so aware and i am so sorry. but this is my…………………… warrior cat oc who represents me (i am so so so so sorry. i am so sorry.) and im doing some tweaks to her design rn and i can’t decide whether she looks better with or without this like spiky cheek fluff that’s supposed to make her face look more starlike. so what do u think. vote now on ur phones (without fluff on the left, with fluff on the right)
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#my art#i have been doodling this silly little cat all over the place for almost 10 yrs btw. and i VERY much suffer from same face syndrome with#both cats and ppl and ive been trying to add like unique variations and stuff when i draw but it’s rly hard. (also ive been getting back in#into drawing if u couldn’t tell. i straight up stopped when i was in college bc i just couldn’t function and this was not the thing i#thought i would come back to once i got out of school but here i am swimming in warrior cats stuff again at age 23 💀💀💀) BUT ANYWAYS. i am#adding butterfly and star motifs to this character who is also me. like u can see her ears are kinda wobbly bc they’re supposed to be shape#like butterfly wings! but the star thing isn’t as evident so I thought maybe the cheek fluff would be nice but then it’s like.. the ear#wobble is already a change and im just worried i will forget the cheek fluff when i doodle her and stuff. ive been rly lenient w how i draw#fluff on cats and stuff and i want to get better at it but i feel like i’ll annoy myself if i mess around w it. but it looks good and is#symbolic so idk 😭 ofc like i would be the best judge of this bc I know what my comfort level is and stuff but … do u like the fluff is what#im asking i guess. and do u think i should carry it forward and make it a thing even if it takes a while to get used to#purrs#i feel so cringe posting my warrior cats characters but idk. it’s my blog i get to post whatever i want so this is what im posting 🤸🏻‍♀️#ALSO plus when i doodle i already majorly simplify her markings so it’s just the freckles. and the markings im whatever about but i feel#like the physicality is really important smth i would always capture no matter how intense the drawing is and smth i kinda want to#challenge myself to get better / more consistent at a little bit. so yeah. idk#pepe
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tate-lin · 4 months
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Rant incoming concerning fatphobia:
I find it superrrr vexing and distasteful whenever someone threatens me with the 'do you want to become fat' thing. I understand that since my natural body frame is being thin, it'd indicate bad things for my health if I do become fat (if you're naturally born big, then getting bigger probably won't mean anything too bad) but I just deeply resent the underlying implication of it all. Like ofc it's better for me in a societal sense to be thin, especially since I don't have a thick skin to negative comments at all, but like?? If you want to scold me in order to make me eat more healthily, just cite health reasons! There's literally no reason to bring up fatness!! What's everyone's deal?? Is it a crime to be fat?? Smh 💀
Some ppl act as if ppl automatically become ugly when they're fat which is just blatantly untrue. And in the first place I'm not even particularly good-looking so it's not gonna be the end of my world if I get bigger. Ofc if being fat negatively affects me physically and/or mentally then I think those are good causes for concern but at least lead with that if you're truly concerned about me for god's sake
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amatres · 1 year
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I know you have to choose the option but the farewell conversation that sticks most in my head in the Gallows is with Carver where Hawke can say something along the lines of 'This is how we're supposed to be, side by side' and he tells them they know it can't be like that forever.
Like, my Hawke at least spent so much of her life building her identity in service of her family. Hawke most resembles their father no matter what, and the family is shaped around them narratively (if you're a mage or not deciding which sibling you lose first and how that class effects how those siblings feel about themselves and their place in the family) and they shape themselves around their family in turn, exist for them, takes up the role of leader after Malcolm has passed. The answers of where Hawke considers home when they're asked never felt right, because they lived on the run for so many of their formative years, the true answer feels like to me to be their home is their family, the place never mattered beyond being allowed to rest and not look over their shoulder every day.
What happens to that identity when everyone you built it around is gone? Where would they consider home when it's all said and done? The Amell estate was something they got for their mother, one of the answers they can give to Varric in Act 2 on what they plan to do now is watch over their mother, Carver tells Hawke to look after her when the expedition separates them. Then their mother is gone too.
There's no final statement for this since it's just me rambling, but it's hm, sad to think about. Who is Hawke if they aren't living for the sake of another, when all those they lived for are gone and they never felt at home anywhere but in the people they surrounded themselves with?
#ama mumbles#dragon age#dragon age 2#hawke#allyn hawke (oc)#im not writing meta this is just me rambling thoughts specifically born from trying to figure out allyns uhh problems lol#by act 3 the answers is probably their companions but eventually everyone leaves their side besides their possible li#so what do they consider home who are they when they are truly alone#my hawke is a mage which also shapes this perspective i dont know how it affects nonmage hawke#anyway carver was right and valid to want to find an identity separate from the family#bc like look how his sibling destroys themself trying to shape themselves around it#as for my own hawke id say she felt most content in lothering she briefly was feeling the same in kirkwall in act 2 but when leandra dies#part of her dies with her i suppose. shes the champion of kirkwall and its a death sentence bc shes a mage so she decides#to try and help at least make the world a bit more comfortable for any mage that comes after her#allyn and anders in act 3 shaking hands over being suicidal and throwing themselves into at least making it mean something#by helping ppl like them maybe having a better life#on that point the chantry explosion didnt feel like a axe to allyn it felt like a release. finally the hold of this place has lifted#if that makes sense lol. kirkwall was only for her mother now that shes gone allyn was waiting for an end to her stay there and it came#back to being on the run. something that felt more natural to her. maybe one day she will have a small farm again#or maybe she will live in a city with a garden if the people she surrounded herself wanted to live there#just somewhere that the noose of her family's ghosts were no longer strangling her
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tiredgn0me · 1 year
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arguably one of the worst feelings is doing everything u can to not cry in front of someone but knowing they know ur trying not to cry
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tokkismoved · 1 year
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okay   so.   i’ve   decided   to   move   blogs   n   d/iscord   to   start   fresh   along   with   a   future   alias   change   </3   but   from   now   on   i   will   not   be   following   /   interacting   /   writing   with   people   that   associate   with   r*afi   /   i*cah   (   c/loudfey   ,   f/airynuit   /   d/reamsboat   ,   wtv   other   url   she   has   )   bcus   she   makes   me   extremely   uncomfortable   and   i’m   not   going   to   abdicate   my   comfort   just   so   she   pops   up   on   my   dash   every   ten   posts   </3   i   hope   everyone   understands   and   thank   you   for   writing   with   me   but   like.   no   more   seeing   people   that   make   me   feel   bad,   okay   ?   it’s   2023,   it’s   all   abt   comfort   <3
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stonerzelda · 2 years
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While being all brokenhearted and sad writing that post it should be noted that i thought i saw a house centipede in the bed and jumped up, only to find the sweetest roundest little baby mouse that ever lived hiding behind the bed. Tha k u little mouse for trying to cheer me up but sneaking up on me in my blankets is not ideal for me. Esp at almost 4am. Im sorry
#edit: k i deleted most of the posts crying abt this bc like. whatever#i dont care about that sack of shit at least i know i was fuckin right to block them bc they WOULD have gotten worse#like aw a 20 yr old u thought was cool turned out to be creeped out by ur progressively weird messages abt other users uve had sex with? :(#sooo weird aha they must just be dumb❤ like lol#all i care abt is making sure things at least end in good terms with my old mutual bc. she was cool. and id hate for her to think i was#ever malicious T__T this sux.#altho i still dont know for sure if this is what happened like if they turned everyone on me but. cant shake the feeling#it was all around the same time i should have guessed but i GUESS i thought theyd be a fuckin adult and get over it#sigh. idk. this is so dumb im just upset at the feeling This is why we all drifted. like im in the wrong for not wanting to be friends#w someone who was way too comfortable just...sharing shit i didnt consent to hear abt ppl i knew that Also didnt consent to me being told#qnd this all happened SO LONG ago and i didnt even know because i thought this asshole would be normal for some reason!!#this whole time ive been disappointed n a little sad in not seeing certain ppl active anymore but still thibking fondly of them#and this whole time. they could've just been fed lies abt me. its 730am im so fuckin tired but this thought is rly hurtin 😞#....i just rly hope this isnt why ok. because this isnt anywhere near fuckin fair if it is. im fine if they just dont wanna follow anymore#thats fine im 200% cool with that and i Respect when ppl need to move on whatever i get THAT. but its fuckin greasy if it was out of spite.
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treesbian · 6 days
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everything's gone to shit and life is completely meaningless and i hope i wake up dead <- he lost the receipt to lightbulbs that had the wrong base size
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bastardlybonkers · 1 month
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thinking about how marcille thinks that her feelings for falin are parental while the audience can see the attraction that she either cant see or doesnt want to see
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parental doting, nagging her to use the stuff she bought her
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this fucking cover. every single relationship pictured here being parent/caretaker and the one being taken care of.
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how when marcille starts this matching scene its like a mother bathing her child, right up until falin rises over her and grasps her hand, to which marcille is very suddenly confronted with a cocktail of complicated feelings, attraction, fear, shock, confusion. this isnt just a horny scene guys Look at marcilles face, her eyes, the black background on their clasped hands. how marcille doesnt blush until the interaction is over, then slips right back into the comfortable dynamic of calling falin cute and small and inviting her into her bed
this is how marcille sees their dynamic. parental, caretaking. safe.
is it that kui genuinely meant it like this and we as an audience found a different interpretation? is it that marcille is dense to her own feelings, misinterpreting protectiveness for parenting? is it that marcille doesnt Want to understand her own feelings? is it that shes an elf, and elves generally infantilize shorter lived races? is it a conscious or subconscious method of self protection, denying herself the fact that shes in love with someone who wont even make it past her own young adulthood?
(also im gonna need you guys to be so fucking serious here if you even Think about making the claim or god forbid saying that Im making the claim that farcille is ""problematic"" because marcille has complicated and nuanced feelings for falin im going to combust)
edit for clarification: i meant if the attraction was intentional not the parental feelings lol just making sure cause i think some ppl mightve thought i meant it the other way around
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arachine · 1 year
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— ❝on this fateful night...two hearts danced.❞ ˚₊✩‧₊
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ᥫ᭡ pairing :: neteyam sully x human! reader
ᥫ᭡ synopsis :: in omaticayan culture, a young na’vi male does not yet become a full fledged adult until he passes one of two rites of passage: 1) choosing an ikran, and 2) carving a bow from the wood of Hometree (and/or choosing a woman). reader is now 20, and the only man she’s ever loved is expected to choose a wife soon. one day when she overhears a rumor concerning neteyam and the first woman in line to betroth him, reader is struck with grief, ultimately venturing off deep into the forest where she knows nobody will follow her—somewhere forbidden. however, unbeknownst to her, a certain someone follows her trail…
ᥫ᭡ genre :: mature
ᥫ᭡ general tags :: 18+ (explicit sexual content, explicit language), angst, fluff
ᥫ᭡ content warnings :: characters aged up to 20, use of alcohol, inebriation, size kink (kinda), vaginal fingering, oral sex (f receiving), male masturbation, overstimulation, riding (no penetration), m/f ejaculation, squirting…i took some things out but i think that’s it?
ᥫ᭡ notes :: what a long week this has been…but we made it! i cannot believe the first thing i post after being on hiatus for months is blue alien sex. anyway, i hope you all enjoy. also, be mindful that the dialogue switches between formal and casual. it’s something that i noticed neteyam and kiri do a lot in the movie. for what reason? idk…but the big font after the read more is intentional bc ik some ppl complain that the small font hurts their eyes :3
ᥫ᭡ word count :: 7.2k
— playlist :: spotify link
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“You have been wandering off by yourself a lot lately…” 
There goes that attentiveness, you could never put anything past her—Kiri, that is. She was just too good (to a fault), and though her keen eye and emotional intelligence were extremely useful, they were also the most aggravating traits about her. 
Now, you could just tell her the truth about the place you’re always wandering off to, and you also could confide in her about the thing that’s been plaguing your mind recently—but you don’t, because you know better.  
For a split second, though, you hesitate telling her. The lean girl tilts her head, eyes flitting between your face and the satchel in your hands. Smoothly, you pull the satchel across your body and shift it to rest behind you—out of sight. 
Kiri seems to notice your apprehension, and so, she peels her eyes from the bag, offering you her full attention by resuming eye contact once again. If she has even the slightest hunch that you’re hiding something, she doesn’t voice her suspicions.
“Well, I won’t pry, sister. You know that I am always here to listen,” she reassured, reaching out a gentle hand towards your face. You let the tips of her fingers graze your cheek, the warmth of her hand providing transitory comfort. 
The two of you exchange sweet smiles before you pull away. It was getting dark, and the longer you stayed here, the harder it’d be to avoid the very thing you were trying to get away from—the very person you were trying to get away from. 
“I know, Kiri,” you grabbed her hand, encasing it between your own, “I know…but—I have to go. I promise I’m alright. I’ve just…been doing some thinking, and I think I gotta sort some things out with myself before I can be around the rest of you, you know?” 
There’s a silence between the two of you, and you’re not exactly sure if she’s taken offense to what you’ve just said, or if she’s carefully choosing her words. You decide on the latter though, because the last thing you want to do is make her feel as if she’s done something wrong, or if anyone has done something wrong. This was entirely on you; you and your stupid, selfish human heart. 
“Yes, I know what you mean,” she replies, squinting her eyes. Again, there’s a silence, but you can tell she still has something to say, like she’s mulling it over. “Will you at least be here tonight? You know, for the big feast? Everyone will be here, even Neteyam,” the girl tsks playfully, shaking her head as she walks circles around you. 
Immediately your body stiffens, and she responds to this by teasing you, “Or, I could just save you something…or maybe i’ll ask Neteyam to save you something since he’ll be the most important man tonight.”
“And why would you do that?” the words leave your tongue before you have the chance to process them. It reads rather defensively, but you ignore it. “I mean, why—why ask Neteyam?” 
“Because he’s your friend…” kiri pokes you, “because you love him,” she whispers, only this time her voice is a lot more serious, a lot quieter—a whisper. This is when you get that feeling again. 
That weird, achy feeling that leaves your stomach in knots and your throat all puffy. The sensation is debilitating—suffocating, and the only way you know how to ease it is by doing what you had set out to do in the first place (though, you were swiftly interrupted).
“Don’t be silly, Kiri,” your smile drops solemnly, “we’re…friends, just friends. Besides, he’s going to be spoken for soon. There are a lot of Na’vi women who would make fine mates…” Your voice decrescendos into the forest night air, the conversation lasting a lot longer than you’d anticipated. To stop your solemn mood from being expressed outwardly, you quickly turn around, looking back once to speak.
“Anyway, I have to go now. I’ll see you later.” Kiri nods and waves bye, her eyes watching as your small frame disappears out of her family’s tent. 
A cacophony of voices and music fall on deaf ears as you make your way through the village. The preparation is beginning, but all you can think about is him. Him, him, him. 
And ever since you overheard a rumor that Neytiri and Mo’at had chosen the next in line to become tsahik after Neytiri, your heart stopped beating…because you knew. You knew exactly what this meant—the end.
Neteyam was to be a future olo’eyktan, after all. And in Na’vi culture, the future head of the clan and the future spiritual representative were to be betrothed. You knew that, and yet, you couldn’t fathom it. Because then it’d be the end. 
The end of your late night rendezvous, the end of your special talks, the end of your banter, and your clandestine glances—your whispers. The ones that were quiet, and innocent…the ones that tingled the shell of your ears. Meant for him and you only. 
It was selfish, really. Stupid. You knew the day would come when he’d have to grow up and fulfill his duties as a Na’vi male. Just not this soon though, you wanted to hold onto him a little longer. And if drinking your pain away to preserve those precious memories could do that, then you’d do it. 
Lost in your train of thought, you don’t register that you’ve walked yourself right into the heart of a crowd until you bump into a young na’vi child. Apologizing, you then attempt to squeeze through the sea of bodies, tapping lightly on people’s legs until you reach the front. The people were cheering, celebrating the hunters’ return and the game that the Great Mother had graciously given them. 
Slowly, hunters had begun pooling in from the forest on direhorseback. Then, they started coming in clusters, all ululating, and pumping their fists in the air while holding their dead game in the other. Your head turned in awe as each hunter rode past you, the energy of the people so contagious that your sour mood was starting to dissipate, even if just a little. 
Thinking that was the last of the riders, you begin walking again, but the sound of heavy hooves striking the ground halt your movements. Turning your head back to the trees, you see something moving behind the shrubbery, and then enters none other than the man of the hour: Neteyam. If the people weren’t cheering before, they were definitely cheering now—especially since he’d managed to catch an adult sturmbeest (which was a difficult feat). 
The direhorse strides slowly through the crowd, and stops in the centre on Neteyam’s command. Nobody can take their eyes off of him, and neither can you. He just looks so strong, and masculine—like his father, even though he’s the spitting image of his mother. Neteyam puts his hand into the air before he dismounts his horse and ushers the people to settle down, and eventually, they do. 
He points to the sturmbeest that his direhorse is carrying back to be prepared. “Tonight, my brothers and sisters…” a pause, “we dance! we sing! we feast!” His words excite the villagers again, uluations so loud that your ears begin to ring. Just as you’re about to turn away, his eyes meet yours—he smiles. And there it is. That achy feeling in your chest. 
He wants to say something, reaches his arm out to you as if he were silently telling you to wait up, but then a girl strikes up a conversation with him. At first, you’re not entirely sure who it is—and you shouldn’t even care—but then you do a double take and your heart sinks a little more. It was Tsimandi, the girl rumored to be his betrothed. 
From this distance, you can’t hear what they’re talking about, so you watch intently. He’s got his head thrown back in hearty laughter, and she’s touching him—actually touching him, her hands wrapped around his forearm in an attempt to pull him further away. 
You think if you stay a second longer you’ll actually become a pile of liquid where you stand, so you take this opportunity to slip away while he’s preoccupied. 
When Neteyam looks back, he notices your absence. Squinting, he looks around in search of you, and then he sees what looks like a person disappearing into the thick of the forest. Just what is she doing?
“I apologize, Tsimandi, but I must do something,” he begins backing away, a genuine expression etched onto his face, “I will see you tonight, at the feast!” 
“Oh, o-okay,” she mutters but he’s already run off. Neteyam calls for his direhorse and waits at the edge of the forest until it comes running towards him. Before he can mount it and follow you, someone calls out to him. 
“And where are you going?” the voice queries, tone laced with suspicion. He recognizes who it belongs to and sighs. 
“Nowhere, sir,” he dismounts, meeting his father’s eyes, his mother also accompanying him. 
“Yeah, I’d hope so. The people are throwing this feast for you, or have you forgotten?” Jake gives him a once over, eyes still boring into his son. 
“No, sir. I have not forgotten,” the boy lowers his gaze in embarrassment. 
“Good. Go get ready, knucklehead.”
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With each trudge through the forest, you were losing more and more sunlight. You’d walked about halfway to your destination when you remembered the bottle sloshing around in your satchel. 
Usually, you waited to drink the liquid there, but you decided given today’s strenuous events, you’d have some now. A reward, you tell yourself. Taking the bottle out of the bag, you lift your mask from your face briefly, twisting open the top and taking a big swig. 
No matter how many times you did it, the taste always made you gag. Bourbon—is what they called it. It was equal parts bitter and pungent but it did the trick. Helped you to relax, to forget. The first time you came across it, it was by pure accident. 
You’d been somewhere you shouldn’t have been, doing things you shouldn’t have been doing. But one thing led to another, and soon enough, you were inebriated for the first time. 
By the time you drink half of your weight in liquor, you reach your destination. The old shack. After what happened with the Sky People, Jake’s first rule as olo’eyktan was to prohibit anyone from entering. 
Even being somewhere remotely around the area was forbidden. But you were no stranger to disobedience, you’d come here once with Lo’ak (which was your first time actually). 
Though, you didn’t get to explore much because Tuk had spoiled your fun by telling Jake. That day was one of your favorite memories, you think. Jake couldn’t stop yelling at the two of you, but all you could do was laugh. Nothing was really even funny, but you couldn’t help it. Seeing Jake’s eye twitch at your outburst only exacerbated it. 
Lo’ak was getting the worst of it, and Neteyam fell victim to Jake’s nagging too for not ‘being there’. After a while, he’d dismissed the bunch of you from his tent and as soon as you were out of earshot, the three of you went into a frenzy of laughter. You think back fondly on those memories, all the ones that include Neteyam, that is. 
“God, there isn’t a second when I’m not thinking of you…” you sigh in exhaustion, extending an arm out to open the shack’s door. Reaching in your satchel, you pull out two jars full of glow worms (you’ve found that two jars are enough to light up the shack). Ambling over to your favorite spot, you open a cabinet and reach for another bottle of that bitter liquid you willingly put into your body. 
It’s still a wonder to you how well preserved these bottles remained over the years, and you’re pretty sure you’ve heard Norm or someone mention that the older the liquor, the better it tastes (which was a lie, but alas, you down another shot). 
“Wooo,” a cough erupts from your throat, “yep, still nasty.” 
At this point, the liquor is starting to take effect. Warmth radiates throughout your entire body, and you can feel your limbs gradually getting heavier. Being drunk had to be one of your top three favorite feelings. 
It either made you: sad, tired, or giggly (maybe even all at once). But now? Now you were feeling sleepy, so you groggily trudge over to one of the beds in the shack. 
As soon as your body hits the plush, a cloud of dust filters through the air. It was incredibly disgusting, but you’d slept in worse places. For now, you would lay here…succumbing to a sweet slumber. 
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Neteyam had gone home without fuss as promised. Go and get ready. Well, he was doing exactly that now, exchanging his previous attire for that of something more formal. He rolled his eyes and huffed. Sometimes his father could just be a…
“Son of a bitch,” the boy snapped, his frustration reaching its peak. He’d been standing in the tent for about 10 minutes trying to figure out this headpiece his mother had laid out for him, but could not for the life of him figure it out. 
Giving up, he throws it to the ground and takes a seat with his head in his hands. Kiri slips in shortly after his outburst, bending to the ground to retrieve the item. Hesitantly, she walks over to her brother. 
“If you needed some help, you could have called, brother.” Neteyam lifts his head up from his hands to see Kiri towering over him, his eyes breaking contact with hers as she sits down next to him. There’s a pregnant pause, but it doesn’t last for long because Kiri is already opening her mouth to speak.
“What is troubling you?” She asks, forcing Neteyam to turn his back to her so that she can place the headpiece onto him properly. He inhales deeply, then exhales.
“I do not know…I saw (your name) earlier and…” Kiri hums, encouraging him to continue, “and—she had this strange look on her face.” 
“Look? What do you mean? Was she angry? Sad?” 
“I have never seen it before, sister. She usually looks happy when she sees me…but this look was different,” his voice is almost inaudible when he finishes. Kiri ponders for a bit, tilting her head as if she were mentally putting the puzzle pieces together. 
“How come you did not speak to her?” Kiri makes her final adjustments to the headpiece, ushering Neteyam to meet her eyes. 
“I was going to…I tried to, but Tsimandi found me before I could,” he fiddles with his fingers. Kiri takes note of his disposition, and she frowns empathetically. Clearly, whatever was going on with you two was something you had to work out together. This wasn’t like either of you! 
“But it was not just today either,” he continues, “she has been distancing herself for awhile, have you noticed?” She laughs at this, nodding her head.
“Yes, she has been acting a little strange lately. I think I might know what is troubling her, brother,” the girl takes his hand into her own. “But I cannot tell you. This is something that concerns only she and you…”
Neteyam squints his eyes in confusion, muttering a ‘what’. His mouth opens to speak but he is swiftly interrupted upon Jake and Neytiri’s arrival. He looks to Kiri for some clarification but all she says is: ‘go, go, you have a feast to attend’, followed with a, ‘find her later’.
“Well? Come on, the people won’t wait for your blue ass all day will they?” Jake teases. Neytiri slaps his arm, scolding him playfully. 
“Ah, my son, my beautiful son,” she pads to where he stands, taking his face into her hands. “It is time to go, we must celebrate you.”
Jake nods, flashing a quick wink of approval. Together, they all walk out of the tent and through the village where they’re instantly greeted with colorful luminescence, loud music, and food. All things that have been so generously prepared for him. By the time they make it down to the Tree of Souls, everyone halts their cheering to hear what Jake has to say.
“Tonight we eat,” a pause, “in honor of Neteyam’s mighty victory!” Jake grabs his eldest son’s hand, raising it in the air. “He led his first attack against the Sky People and made it back without any casualties!” A sudden roar of praise erupts from the crowd. 
Everyone is chanting his name, and clapping, but even amidst all this praise, he can’t help but to think about you. What does all of this matter if you’re not here to celebrate with him? 
You’ve been by his side since the two of you could walk, so where are you now? The thought saddens him, but he can’t wear his heart on his sleeve tonight. Not when there’s so many people here just for him. 
“For the past 20 years, my son has always been just a boy to me. But now I realize…he is a man—and he has proven himself in front of the eyes of Eywa,” The former marine glances down at his son, eyeing him in admiration. “Enough talking, let us feast!”
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Laughter and songs fill the warm, breezy nighttime air. It’s been about two hours since the celebration commenced, and Neteyam has just about made his rounds to every important family. 
He smiles warmly as he looks at the scene in front of him: children playing and dancing by the fireside, putting on elaborate performances for the adults still filling their bellies full of food. Everyone is lively—happy, a testament to tonight’s success. 
Mo’at is pleased by this especially, she tells him that ‘this is what the people needed’—you know, to boost morale. At some point, when nobody is watching, he slips away from the party to walk around. Unbeknownst to him, someone has seen him. 
“Getting tired?” a voice questions from the shadows. Out comes Kiri, revealing herself from behind a leaf. 
“Yes, exhausted actually,” he jokes, disconnecting his braid from his direhorse. “No, but I need to find (your name). She has not come back and it is dark.”
“I figured you would leave early, that’s why I covered your ass and told Dad you were not feeling well,” the feline-like girl smirks. 
“Do you have an idea where she might be?” 
Kiri takes a moment before answering, “I’m not sure…but for some reason, I have a hunch that she’s at the old shack,” Neteyam furrows his brows in confusion. 
“Why do you think she’s there?” he queries, “I mean, it is forbidden.” Kiri offers him a shrug.
“I don’t know but if you’re going to find her, do it now while dad still thinks you’re not feeling well.”
With that, he thanks her for the intel and mounts his horse, disappearing into the thick of the forest. On the way there, his mind conjures up just about every possible scenario that might explain your absence. 
Were you upset with him? Did he do something or say something that you didn’t like? He wishes he could just read your thoughts because right now, his heart is pounding so rapidly within the confines of his chest, that he thinks it’ll explode. 
This wasn’t like you two, everything was always so easygoing. Being with you was easy, like breathing. But this? His heart couldn’t handle this. Yeah, there’s been some distance between the two of you recently but not due to his own volition—it was duty. If he could spend every second of his life by your side, just being kids, laughing with you, playing with you, he would. 
He’s trying to recount these last few days, weeks—months. Trying to pinpoint when exactly things got like this between you…pinpoint when you stopped smiling at him with that smile that made his head all fuzzy, and his heart race like a kid running for the first time. 
“Ah, everything’s going to shit, buddy,” he sighs, rubbing the side of his horse, “I don’t know what is wrong.” His mammalian companion grunts empathetically, stopping in its tracks at the edge of the forest when it sees the abandoned link shack. Neteyam doesn’t bother scolding her, because even the animals know that this place is forbidden. 
“Alright, I will see you later, okay? Stay here,” he pats her, disconnecting the bond. From this distance, he can see that there seems to be some sort of light illuminating from inside the shack. 
That alone already confirms Kiri’s hunch. The closer he gets, the more his stomach feels uneasy. He doesn’t even know why he’s nervous, but he attempts to ease his mind (and body) by telling himself that it’s only you. He’s talked to you one on one hundreds of times, so what’s the difference now?
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Noises in the distance rouse you from your ephemeral repose. When you stand up, your head spins with the room, causing you to instinctively reach out for the nearest surface available. Whatever was outside had better be non-threatening, because you were not in the condition to be fighting—let alone standing. When you were drunk like this, you couldn’t even hurt a fly. 
“Fuck, I’m gonna have the worst headache soon,” you huff quietly, still aware that there might be someone or something outside. The noise is getting closer, and you’re running out of time to find a hiding spot. 
Quickly, you grab the closest thing you can to defend yourself (which is literally a jar of glow worms), and crouch down below the window. When you lift your head just enough to see outside, the makings of a silhouette cloud your vision. 
“Shit, shit, shit,” you whisper-yell, tightening your hold on the jar. Lifting your head up again, you notice that the figure is not in the spot it was previously. Then, the knob to the shack twists, and now it’s opening, and—
“(Your name)?” 
You pause your attack, slowly dropping your hand (that’s holding the jar) to your side. A flood of relief washes over you once you register who the voice belongs to. Rising from the ground, you open the door fully to see Neteyam standing in the doorway. 
“I almost killed you, you know!” you raise the jar, pulling him inside of the shack. 
“I think it would take more than a jar of worms to kill me,” he teases. Rolling your eyes, you continue ushering him further inside, leading him to an area where you can sit and talk. 
“What…what are you doing here?” you finally ask, folding your arms across your chest. Neteyam towers over you from this height, so he accommodates you by dropping to his haunches. 
“I was worried about you,” the boy confesses, “what are you doing here? Why were you not at the feast?” Suddenly, you don’t really feel like talking anymore. Even though the adrenaline from before was still pumping through your veins, so was the alcohol in your system. You’re not so sure you’d be able to keep your composure long enough to answer without exposing your truest feelings. So, you decide on deflecting. 
“Aren’t you the man of the hour? I think you should go back to the party before daddy throws a fit. We both know how he gets when his perfect little son isn’t at his every beck and call…” As soon as the words spill from your tongue, you wince. It came out meaner than you meant, and the last thing you wanted was to give him shit for being a caring friend. 
“I’m sorry, I didn’t—I didn’t mean that,” you apologize, sitting down on the bed. All he does is sigh, but he takes this opportunity to enter your space, gets all close until his body is nestled between your legs. 
“I know…I know, but I want you to tell me what’s wrong, hm?” his fingers lift your chin, “so I can fix it.” 
“Can’t fix this, ‘Teyam,” a saltine droplet ribbons down your face. Your head is tilted up with his fingers, but you can’t even force yourself to meet his gaze. God, how pathetic did you look right now? 
Here you were, inside an abandoned shack, drinking your body weight in liquor…all while a celebration was being thrown in your best friend’s honor. And for what? Because you were jealous? Because you liked him—loved him? 
You knew that eventually your relationship would shift. That he’d take on his duties as the future olo’eyktan, and you’d just be his human friend he hangs with from time to time. How stupid could you be to think things would stay like this forever?
“Hey, hey, hey,” he soothes, both hands now cupping your cheeks, “don’t do that. Do not shut me out. We’re not like this, (your name), you used to always talk to me about things.”
Things. You’d talk about things. But those things were not like these things. And if he knew what things you were thinking about, the things that involved him…then you two would never talk about things again. 
You’re curious, though. What if you just told him? Just told him about all the days you’ve loved him, all the nights you’ve stayed up thinking of him—all the stars you counted wishing for him? At least then, the burden of keeping such a secret would stop weighing so heavy on your heart. 
“I..” a breath, “I heard a rumor.” The boy hums, encouraging you to continue. “I heard your mother has chosen her successor.”
“Is that what this is about? Why does this bother you?”
“Because you know what this means! We both know what this means, don’t be dense, ’Teyam,” you droop your head in sorrow, coaxing him to just lift it back up. Only this time, his hold on your face is a lot firmer. His eyes are fiercer.
“No. I don’t, so just tell me.”
“You’re gonna be the future olo’eyktan, and we both know that the future clan leader and the chosen tsahik are to be betrothed,” you start, “there will be no time for me! No more late night talks, no more exploring, no more secret whispers…I mean, I get it, you have duties to fulfill but…I wanna be selfish a little longer. Can’t I be selfish a little longer?”
You say the last line while meeting his gaze. You’re teary eyed and shaking, but you try your best to keep any semblance of composure you have left intact (though, it’s failing). His expression is indiscernible. 
It makes you nervous. Sick. And now you’re forcing yourself not to throw up because…the realization that you just told someone your deepest, truest, most vulnerable feelings makes you physically ill. 
“Oh, god, I’m sorry. Forget what I jus—“
“Are you serious? You don’t get it do you?” Neteyam’s head falls forward, a little chuckle slipping past his lips. His hands leave your head and slither down to your hands. He takes them into his own, eyeing you while kissing the knuckles of each. 
The act is incredibly intimate, sends white-hot electricity down the column of your spine. Renders you speechless. All you can do is sit there, too scared that if you move or speak, you’ll shatter into a million little pieces. 
“I have duties, yes…but my heart is already spoken for. Always has been.” 
“What are you saying, ’Teyam,” your head snuggles into the warmth of his hand. You know exactly what he’s saying, but you want to hear him say—
“I see you,” he whispers in your ear, “you are my most beloved.” The warmth of his breath tingles the shell of your ear, it takes the strength of a thousand men to not scream. 
But in this moment? In this moment you want to kiss him. You want to kiss him silly, actually, but you quickly remember the thing on your face preventing your lips from connecting with his. There are truly evil forces conspiring against you.
“I want to kiss you,” you admit solemnly. 
“Oh, you don’t know how many nights I’ve spent dreaming about kissing you. Too many,” he jokes, “but I’m afraid if we remove this, you’ll die.” 
“Then you don’t have to kiss my lips,” a silence, “you can kiss me anywhere you’d like. Anywhere.” 
His green eyes flitter between your face and your body, and then his hands are on you, forcing you to lay back against the bed. You lift your head up and lean back onto your elbows, watching through lust-filled eyes as he begins his ministrations. 
He starts from the bottom, works his way up real slowly—too slowly. He’s showing restraint, and while you appreciate the fact that he’s worshiping your body like a devoted follower worships their deity, you want him to ravage you. To eat you up until there’s nothing left but bones. 
“’Teyam, please…” you breathe out impatiently. Like the cocky-brat he is, he ignores your pleas, only laughing into your skin. 
“Shh, be calm.” The plush of his lips trail up the plains and pastures of your body, up your calves, your thighs (he spends the most time there), and then comes to a stop at the crest of your breasts. His fingers fiddle with the cloth covering your chest, lightly tracing the edges that rest just beneath your mounds. 
A tease is what he is. And you didn’t have the time for a tease, so you figured you’d help speed up the process by removing it. Sitting up, you untie the makeshift top and let it fall to your lap, smirking deviously as if you’ve done something so naughty. 
“Thought I’d help you,” you grin, wrapping your hands around his neck, “Please, no more going slow…I think we’ve been going slow for twenty years, don’t you think?” 
And he gets the hint, once again resuming his assault on your body, but this time with more fervor. More urgency. He’s kissing you everywhere, licking wet stripes over your chest, and leaving love bites in the places where he’s kissed you. Right now he’s acting on his most basic, primal instincts—he’s claiming you as his mate—in the only way he knows how to. 
The feeling of his hands on your neck, back, thighs and waist send you into oblivion. But then his hands are creeping up to your tits, deft fingers twisting and kneading, and oh god, you’re seeing stars. The addition of his mouth doesn’t help either.
“You’re so,” a kiss, “beautiful,” a suck, “perfect.” Neteyam kneads one breast while his mouth works on another. He plops down onto a pert nipple, using his tongue to draw circles around the area, his saliva acting as a salve. 
A moan (that comes out more like a disgruntled sigh) vacates your throat, and his eyes widen in excitement. The sight of his tail swaying in the background makes you giggle. Cute, you think. 
Even though what the two of you were doing wasn’t innocent, you couldn’t help but to feel all giddy. Reaching a hand out, you place a gentle palm on the side of his face. 
You trace the contours of his nose, his cheekbones, smooth over his jaw, and then stop at his lips. Your thumb grazes them, first the top, then the bottom—learning. Committing them to memory, how they look, feel, and move under your thumb. 
Neteyam is unmoving while you continue to run your finger across his lips—save for his hand, which slowly begins traveling south to your thighs. Experimentally, you push your thumb inside of his mouth, pressing the digit down on his tongue before tracing his cat-like canines. This moment is particularly special, because now it’s you who’s doing the admiring. 
The free hand that’s not inching towards your core, skillfully removes the loin cloth around your hips. Immediately, he’s met with your bare sex. It’s smooth—wet, so incredibly wet that it has his cock twitching, and his hands eager to touch you. He wants to taste you. Feel you, all of you. 
“I—,” a slender finger rubs your slit, “mmf, see you,” you mewl, cupping his cheek. Neteyam’s eyes widen, he wants to hear you make that sound again…and again, and again, and—
The boy repeats the action. Watches your abs flex and tremble from the touch, and your thighs close in on his arm. Using the other hand, he gently pulls them apart and leaves three open-mouthed kisses: one on your inner thigh, one on another, and then a final one at the top of your mound. The heat from his nostrils make you full body shiver; suddenly, being the only one completely bare is slightly bothering you. 
“Do not cover yourself. I want to see you,” his hand finds your cunt again, a long finger pushing into you ever so slowly, “…want to hear those sweet sounds again.” 
A soft sigh leaves your lips as you watch his digit push further into you, the drag of a knuckle against your slick walls aiding in the pleasure. You can’t help but to wince at the intrusion, because shit, this was a lot more than what you were used to—using your fingers, that is. 
You also suppose penetration would be off the table considering humans and Na’vi were never meant to mate, but it doesn’t prevent you from fantasizing about it anyway. How big was it? Did he touch himself? Use his hands and picture yours? 
The thought of him hunching over, rubbing one out, all slick with sweat and pre has your head all dizzy. Your mouth is practically salivating at the mental image you’ve conjured up in your head of him fucking your face, but you know it would never fit. There really are evil forces conspiring against you…
Neteyam’s finger reaching the hilt brings you back down to reality. A forceful thrust that coaxes you to gasp sharply and grab his forearm. After patiently waiting for you to adjust to his size, he begins to move. He sets a steady rhythm, pulling out slowly, then pushing back into you with the same velocity. 
Eventually, his movements become less hesitated, and more calculated. Instead of steady and slow, he begins increasing the pace of his thrusts, then graduates from speed to incorporating force. 
Every delve of his finger, every deliberate drag and prod has fire pooling in the depths of your belly. Squelches and whimpers ricochet off of the metal walls, and fuck, his dick won’t stop twitching. 
It’s grown considerably harder in these past few minutes, and all from just hearing you vocalize your pleasure. When the stretch stops feeling like a stretch, and starts feeling like a ‘give me more’, that’s when you encourage him to add another. And of course, he indulges you. 
The same time he pushes another finger in, is the same time he starts rubbing himself. He’s not even really aware of it at first, it’s mindless. He’s just so entranced by you, and the sounds you’re making, the things you’re saying, the way your cunt’s sucking in his fingers—
Fuck. He just finished all over himself. He doesn’t let that deter him though, keeps fingering you through his post-orgasm, taking care of you until you come undone on his fingers. 
And the sight is amazing, he can’t stop gawking at the way your hole flutters around him, and the nectar-like liquid that drips down the length of his fingers and onto the bed. He wants to taste it. 
“Can I taste you?” he asks. You’re in such a daze that the question doesn’t even register, suddenly too preoccupied with breathing like you’ve forgotten how to. 
“Huh? Wha—ohhhh.” His tongue licks a long stripe up your slit. He concentrates the tip at the bottom, lapping at the essence that leaks from there, and then circles back to your puffy bud. Experimentally, he prods it with his fingers, rubbing it in tantalizingly slow circles. 
The combination of his tongue and his fingers almost feel overwhelming, you feel like a puppet on a marionette with the way he’s maneuvering your legs around for better access. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was a starved man. 
His mouth is slick with drool, and his hands are pressing down so firmly onto your thighs, that you’re sure a handprint will be there for you to discover in the morning. His tongue feels so good on you, so nasty. 
The picture is obscene, unlike anything you’ve ever witnessed before. But the thing that’s really getting to you are the sounds he’s making. Grunts and groans, expletives and mumbles. ‘So good’, ‘perfect’, ‘beautiful’…it has your head spinning and your fists gripping for the sheets beneath you. 
There’s a knot in your abdomen pulled taut like a string of twine. You can feel it twisting and pulling, ready to come undone at the drop of a pin. The more he works on your slit, the more the temperature rises in the shack. 
Was the room always spinning? Did your body always run this hot? It feels like you’ve been thrown into a furnace, and the only source of coolness is the wetness that his tongue provides. 
“‘M gonna, mmf, ’s too much!” you jab at his hand in an attempt to push him away. He’s relentless though, still sucking harshly, and teasing, ramming his thick fingers up against your gummy walls. 
It feels different than when you touch yourself, more intense. Like something’s sitting heavy on your bladder. Then, snap. The string in your abdomen unravels, bringing forth a flood of ecstasy. 
“’Teyam!” you sob, back arching to the ceiling. When he pulls his fingers out, a stream of clear liquid seeps from your cunt. He’s awestruck, staring in admiration as your sweat kissed chest rises and falls rhythmically. 
“Look, your legs are shaking,” he points, biting down a laugh, “why are they shaking?” 
“Oh my god, shut up!” you feign offense, pushing him backwards with a chuckle. He pretends to be wounded, rubbing his back dramatically, ‘oohing’ and ‘owing’ as he does so. When you finally sit up, your eyes naturally fall to his loincloth, a wet ringlet contrasting starkly against the beige textile. 
“Hey…” your voice is hesitant, but teetering on the edge of curiosity, “Can I try something?” 
The boy silently nods his approval, shifting his position on the ground when you amble over to him. A look of confusion molds onto his face following the events that involve you plopping down onto his lap and laying him down. He goes to speak but you interrupt him. 
“Your turn, right? Can’t put it in, but…I can still make you feel good,” you say, tugging on the piece of fabric that separates your sex from his. Eagerly, he removes it for you and lets the item fall haphazardly to the ground. 
It’s big, so big—and pretty too. A beautiful blue hue that matches the rest of his body, paired along with a blushing teal tip that’s oozing pre. You want to know what he tastes like on your tongue…
“So pretty.”
Heat rises to his cheeks, and his tail takes an aquiline form, quivering in rapid movements. His usual, over-confident disposition was slowly dissipating under your intense gaze, and you reveled in it by mocking his bashfulness. 
“Awe, the little kitty’s shy,” you mock, tickling his side. 
“Stop it, I don’t look like those Earth things,” he laughs, pushing your hand away, but to no avail. You continue to dodge his attempts to stop you, tickling him here and there until he accidentally bucks and pulls you down against him. Embarrassingly, you let a whine fall from your lips…still too sensitive down there, you guess. 
There’s a shit-eating grin plastered on his face now, you hate it. “Who’s making noises like a kitty now, huh?” With this, he takes the liberty to do it again, pressing you down hard against his length. 
The feeling of your bare cunt against him is electrifying, probably (definitely) not better than him being inside you, but the next best thing. This was supposed to be your thanks to him. But now he’s taken full charge—maneuvering you back and forth, gripping and kneading—it’s cruel.  
For someone who’s never mated with anyone in his life, he’s sure moving you around like he has. His hands are all over you—thighs, hips, waist, breasts, it’s almost overwhelming. Every touch, addled with the buck of hips, brings forth a new sensation that is better than the last. You think this would be a good way to go out, right on his cock. One last hurrah before the morbid inevitable. 
“You f-feel so good, (your name),” his voice is breathy, “r-really good.” Neteyam’s grip on your arms is vice, partly because he can feel his climax approaching, but mostly because he can tell you’re growing tired. 
Swiftly, he changes your positions to where you’re laying on your back and he’s crouching over you. The tip of his head smoothes over your folds when he pushes up, and before he draws back, you can see just about where his dick would rest if he were inside of you. 
“I’d be all the way up here,” he presses down just beneath your breastbone, “you’re so tiny.” It sounds so dirty, but you know ultimately he’s just making an observation—regardless, the comment has your stomach churning in excitement. 
The both of you watch in fascination as he sheathes himself up and over your cunt, moaning in unison when the tip of his mushroomy head catches against your bud. Euphoric, he thinks. He never imagined that something could feel this good, let alone without connecting bonds. 
Still sensitive from earlier, it doesn’t take too long for you to reach your peak. Neteyam knows that your arrhythmic breathing is a tell-tale sign, and he helps you get there by cooing words of encouragement. 
He goes back and forth between ’I got you’s and ‘it’s okay’s, leaving trails of kisses down your body in his wake. The second you finish, you’re pulling him down onto you tight. Moaning and whining into his ear, whispering those same words of encouragement that he whispered to you prior.
“So good, ‘Teyam,” you claw at his back, “keep going, want you to feel good too.” And he does. Unrelenting in his attack against your sex, he comes with a few more pistons. 
You eagerly welcome him into your arms when he drops from exhaustion, and hold him there until your erratic breaths synchronize. The both of you are disgustingly sweaty and sticky, but even so, you feel at peace. 
You bask in the tranquil quietness of the night, just staring at each other. Soft caresses and soothing hums. Then, Neteyam speaks. 
“On this fateful night, two hearts danced…” he whispers, grabbing your hand to hold it over his heart. 
“What does this mean?” you smile at him. He ponders over it and then explains. 
“My songcord…I want to tell this story,” he starts, “the night when two hearts became one.” 
A crystal droplet cascades down your face, “that sounds beautiful.”
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