#maybe in the specifically amorous way but deeply. and I will regardless. but I can’t be her husband if she doesn’t view me that way. and
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I guess what should be considered with Marie is whether your character starts a relationship with her because of their shared past drawing him back to her, or because he just feels bad for what part of him did to her. I don't know about Marie, but the idea of someone hooking up with me purely out of pity would be awful, worse than a rejection. No one is obligated to start a romance they don't want to soothe someone else's pain. Of course it's all up to you and how you're playing him, godspeed
TuT everyone seems to hear my quandary as “Am I responsible for this girl’s suffering and thus indebted to get with her to make her better.”
That’s really not it at all. I’m not responsible. I didn’t do that shit. And none of this has ever been based on pity. There’s certainly a level of justice to it and what’s right vs wrong in motivation, but fairness and pity ain’t the same at all.
It’s not “Do I have a responsibility to get with Marie?” (Read: do I owe it to her to romance her to make up for what a part of me did?) — its “Do I have a responsibility to get with Marie?” (Read: is this my dead wife?)
There’s a lot to consider. But. Idk why everyone seems to hear my distress as “Should I pretend to be in love with this girl so I can right a cosmic wrong and heal her, because I’m sort of a part of what did it to her and I feel bad?” and it distress me
I’m not a bad person TuT I don’t just think that way.
It’s “If this is a part of me’s dead wife, who he destroyed and abandoned, am I to me Izanagi? And am I Izanagi to her? Because if so, that means she’s my wife. It means I’m a part of the person who abandoned her, but more than that it means I have a chance to be a better me. It means I have a ‘for better or worse’ and even if I don’t remember the me who made that vow, we are the same person, and that matters to me. I take it serious. I wouldn’t abandon my wife. If we are Izanagi and Izanami to each other, that is more important to me than my character’s preferences or former plans. That’s my wife. I have a responsibility to her, and to myself. I have a chance to end the cycle of abuse. I have a chance to save someone. And even if I don’t remember her, and don’t remember making that promise, if we are to each other those two, it doesn’t matter, and it’s my wife memory or no. And I would put everything else aside for that. That isn’t pity. It’s responsibility sure but not in a begrudging way. In a desperately important choice of love. I would chose the spouse a part of me vowed to love over everything, because they’re me even if I can’t remember, and even if I never do. I would love and become who I need to be, because if that’s my wife, it matters, and it will always matter. The question is if I have that responsibility, if I have that bond. Because I don’t know if I am Izanagi to her. And I know my thoughts and my answers, but you can’t tell someone they love you. And I don’t know if I am to her, and if she does, and I don’t know how to know. So I don’t know what to do. It’s about what I want and who I am being tied to a determinate framework, and not having the other half of the equation, and if I have to guess, trying to figure out what the right thing is to do.
#and I feel like this will still somehow be misinterpreted as something it’s not#but idk how else to say it at this point#ask#anonymous#r’s p4 run#why does everyone think this is about guilt and pity. it’s about right and wrong and loyalty and partnership and values and identity#‘you can’t tell someone they love you’ but isn’t that what you’re doing to yourself?’ — NO. it’s not!!! I love her regardless. not#maybe in the specifically amorous way but deeply. and I will regardless. but I can’t be her husband if she doesn’t view me that way. and#that’s ok! if she would be happier moving on or just doesnt and we go on as friends that’s fine! I am happy to become a new me or bring an#old me back to life and reinhabit him. I don’t like ‘want’ to date her and don’t know if that’s ok. I want to know what she wants#because that impacts what I do. I’m a third of a person in this game. and I can’t make myself be the friend or the husband to her. I can’t#choose if people see me as the whole or the fragment or which fragment. I can only live the best I can as whatever I am#but regardless I want to do right by those a part of me is bound to. just what that means changes and it changes based on a framework I hold#only minimal control over. and that makes ot all so complicated. but it matters so much.#I would be just as happy as Ryung-gu the gay single guy into Kanji as I would Ryung-gu Izanagi the part god trying to love his wife gently.#but I don’t know what I am so I don’t know what to do. which to be which is right. which I am to anyone else. and I can’t control what I am#and am not. so I’m under enormous stress
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Dream Date
Thomas x fem reader
Thomas had been crushing on Y/n for god knows how long
They sat up all night and talked online about every little thing in the world; passions, dreams, futures, meanings…
After a bit of wine and endless encouragement from the band, he finally decided to ask her out.
“Um, y/n, I had a question…” his voice trembled slightly, watching her wash some dishes before patting her hands dry and turning to face him
“Of course, amore. What is it?”
“I was wondering If you wanted to go on a date with me tonight?” He asked, looking at her with fear and anticipation.
He only grew more worried as the girl remained silent, shock written all over her face.
“Are you kidding? I would love to!” She chuckled, approaching Thomas and hugging him tightly
He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, and basked in the sensation of being so close to her. Y/n’s soft, luscious hair slightly tickled his cheek and filled his nose with the pleasant scent of flowers and spring
Thomas was standing in front of the mirror, fumbling nervously with his tie. He had picked a light gray suit with a pink shirt.
“Thomas!! Aren’t you gonna come pick up your princess?” Damiano teased from downstairs, earning a frustrated groan from the blond.
He came up in a second and watched Thomas try and knot his tie, laughing to himself before helping him out.
“Are you nervous?”
“Guess, stronzo.”
Damiano snorted before patting him on the back and pushing him downstairs
“You are incredibly handsome Thomas, she’ll be more than enamored”
“Shut up.”
He got in the car and drove all the way to Y/n’s house, where he noticed she was already waiting on the porch.
She was gorgeous, to say the least. Her curly hair was pulled back with a few pins, light peach eyeshadow on her eye lids and a soft pink lipstick.
He hadn’t realizes she was in front if him, until Y/n spoke.
“Where are we going?”
“Oh um, beautiful- I mean, you, you are beautiful.”
They both blushed, Thomas more out of embarrassment, and he opened the door for her to get in the car.
“What made you decide to finally ask me on a date?” Her soft, honey-like voice broke the silence.
“I am always excited when I’m with you, or when I talk to you. It’s something I don’t really feel with other people.”
“I honestly thought you’d say that you would willingly wake up for me.”
They both started laughing, as they passed the illuminated streets of Rome.
“That’s a given.”
Eventually, the car slowed to a stop, and they both got out.
“Where are we?”
“Remember that place I told you about a few nights ago? I used to come to this meadow every day when I was younger. It was like a safe haven for me.” His voice faded out, looking around and taking in the all-too familiar plants and trees he knew so well.
“Why did you bring me here, then?”
“I wanted you to see it. Maybe it could become our haven.”
Y/n sighed, and picked up a flower from the ground, smelling it.
Meanwhile, the boy opened the trunk of the car and pulled out a blanket and a basket, laying them both down and taking a seat.
The soft glow of the moon softly illuminated the patch of grass they were sitting on, creating a surreal and whimsical feeling.
“To be fair, If you wouldn’t have asked me out one of these days, I would have.” Y/n snorted, opening the basket and gasping.
“CHOCOLATE COVERED STRAWBERRIES??” Y/n’s eyes were comically wide, as she looked between the treats and Thomas
“Well, you know, I did plan for this date to be the cheesiest thing possible.”
“They’re over used for a reason. They rock!”
“We rock.” He added smoothly, feeling himself relax more and more.
“We sure do.”
Taking out another plate out of the basket, Thomas grinned as he remembered one of his favorite childhood movies.
A big smile appeared on Y/n’s face as she saw the giant portion of pasta in front of her, and hurried to find some forks in the basket.
“I suppose we’re eating out of the same plate, correct?”
Thomas nodded and didn’t hesitate to start devouring the food.
They mainly listened to the soft tuned of the car radio while eating in silence, the occasional chirp of a bird catching their attention, until Y/n started giggling.
Thomas looked down, and saw that they both have the same noodle in their mouth, one end in her mouth, on in his.
Thomas smiled sheepishly, as he continued advancing towards Y/n, her actions replicating his.
They were mere centimeters away from each other, Y/n’s hot breath sending shivers through Thomas, her eyes lit up, as If a fire glowed with in them.
She made the final step and closed the distance between them, kissing Thomas tenderly, for so long that they both forgot what breathing felt like.
Eventually pulling apart, they kept staring into each other’s eyes, trying to calm down, despite their hearts being aflame with desire and affection.
“We should film a live-action version of Lady and the Tramp.”
Thomas chuckled and shifted so that he was closer to her, nuzzling his head into the crook of Y/n’s neck.
She picked up the box of strawberries and started shoving them down her throat, eating with a speed that got Thomas worried.
“Woah, woah, woah, slow down! I want some too!”
“You can’t bring me strawberries covered in chocolate and expect me not to eat them!!”
He snorted and leaned over to the basket, pulling out a book.
“What’s that?”
“Poems”
Y/n gasped and lowered herself so that she would align herself with his face.
“Wow! You’re gonna bring me food, read me poetry and show me your hiding spot? I feel like I’m in a romantic movie.” She joked, pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek.
“Well, I am trying to romance you.”
“There are literally so many words for it and you choose romance me?”
“I knew you’d say that.” He scoffed, faking a pout and opening the book. He flipped through a few pages until he ended up at a heavily marked one, a coffee stain on the corner.
“I’m guessing this is your favorite?”
“For one specific reason. Can you guess it?”
Y/n hummed, thinking for a few moments before answering him.
“Is it about sleep?”
“Oh come on! No. It reminded me of you.” He grinned, fluttering the book under her nose.
“Oh god, it’s gonna be a prayer to the devil, won’t it?”
The blond squinted his eyes, seemingly freezing, before starting to flip hurriedly through the pages once more.
“Shit, you’re right.”
“THOMAS!” Y/n elbowed him, scoffing, bursting into laughter along with him.
“Fine, fine, alright. Here it is;
When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;
How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;
And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.
Y/n’s eyes were brimmed with tears, slightly smudging her eye makeup, as she took a deep breath, taking in all that Thomas recited
“What’s it called?”
“When you are old, by William Butler Yeats.”
Y/n let out a silent oh, and looked closer at the sketches around the writing.
There was a small sketch of her, relaxing on the balcony under the stars, and Thomas, looking up at her as if she were his moon.
Her heart was filled with affection for the boy who held it in his hands, who unfortunately didn’t realize how much he meant to her.
“Let’s dance.” She beckoned him, walking towards the car and turning up the volume. A terrible love song erupted from the speakers, making Thomas cringe at the harmonies and lyrics, but he took Y/n’s hand regardless and pulled her closer.
They swung from side to side, looking deeply into each other’s eyes and memorizing every single aspect of the night
“This night is amazing, but this song really fucking sucks.” Thomas eventually spoke, not being able to hold in his commentary any longer.
“Well, not everyone can make music as well as you.”
“Oh you little flirt.” Thomas blushed, brushing a strand of hair out of Y/n’s face and spinning her around, over and over again.
She was giggling as she turned, her flowery dress flowing around, making her look like even more of an angle in Thomas’s eyes.
“I wanna spin you too!”
“I’m taller. You can’t!”
“Bet?”
Y/n pushed Thomas around, but he got stuck while he was with his back to her.
“Ow, Y/n, my arm can’t bend like that!”
He muttered a few curses, instinctively stapling backwards, thus making Y/n fall along with him.
A loud thud was all that he heard before an uncontrollable mess of giggles started wiggling under him.
“YOU’RE CRUSHING ME!”
“No, I’m crushing on you.” He spoke calmly, not getting off of her small body.
“Stronzo!!”
They were both laughing as Thomas got up, pulling Y/n with him, and pressing a passionate kiss to her lips.
They both sat back down on the blanket and nuzzled into each other’s embrace, their breath matching up.
“I never want this night to end.” Y/n whispered against his neck, squeezing his hand.
“It’s the only way it will remain special.”
She smiled contently, before looking up at the stars and letting the faint crickets and rustles of the forrest drive them to sleep.
A/n: I had plenty of inspiration for this🥴 @cantaraiilmionome 😉 for you, amore
Taglist: @fuckim-so-gay @ginny-lily @messyhairday-me @cheese-toastie-11 @wannabemarlenabutiscoraline @simp-per-ethan @maneskinrollercoaster @juststalking @superchrystaldrug @immrbrightsideeee @shehaddreamstoo @tiaamberxx @victoriadeangeliswifey @bidet-and-legolas @makapaka11 @electra-phoebe
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BOY’S CRY
Before sharing his story with the world and becoming one of the most important artists of our time, Frank Ocean was a high school graduate in New Orleans scouring for jobs to pay for studio time to record his potential projects. In August 2005, Hurricane Katrina wreaked havoc across the region, provoking Ocean’s move from New Orleans to Los Angeles, California. It was in California that Frank eventually found his opening into the music industry. Landing a songwriting deal, he began ghostwriting for many of the biggest artists we know today: Justin Bieber (“Bigger”, 2008) and Beyoncé (“I Miss You”, 2009). In 2009, he started working with Odd Future, specifically Tyler, the Creator - one of his best friends, who played a pivotal role in encouraging him to continue writing songs, but for himself. Through Odd Future, Frank was able to meet Producer, Tricky Stewart who eventually introduced him to an American Record Label: Def Jam Recordings. Though this deal was meant to serve as his platform for releasing music, out of frustration he released his first mixtape, nostalgia, ULTRA, for free download on Tumblr. Frank explained that he was frustrated with the label for not being supportive of his efforts after signing. Regardless of the heightened tension in Frank’s relationship with the label, this mixtape ignited the spark of his fame to follow. Frank’s pilot success with this mixtape allowed his standing to grow tremendously, eliciting feature requests from A-listers such as Jay-Z and Kanye West, but for the most part, Frank remained highly selective with his craft and unwaveringly loyal to Tyler and Odd Future.
This origin story is only the tip of the elusive iceberg that is Frank Ocean. Since before the days of nostalgia, ULTRA, Frank has been selective with his public interactions. Once a ghostwriter for pop stars and then a secret weapon among Odd Future’s large roster, playing the background seemed to come naturally to him. However, the star within him proved too bright to contain. Still, since his rise in stature, rather than outwardly embracing the fame that was guaranteed, he chose instead to remain guarded with his art and protective of his image. Over time, this has allowed him to meticulously reveal himself on his own terms, using his art as a way to give insight into his identity. It was only when speculations about his sexuality began to circle through the hip-hop and pop community prior to the release of his debut studio album, channel ORANGE, that the once-guarded artist decided to become candid in a way he never previously attempted; on his Tumblr, through an open letter to his fans titled Thank You, Frank went on to reveal his bisexaulity:
Credit: http://frankocean.tumblr.com/post/26473798723
I don’t think I’m exaggerating in the slightest when I say that this letter was a beautiful, poetic exemplification of love. In typical Frank fashion, it wasn’t an overt admission of anything, because there isn’t anything to admit. We are who we are, and according to Frank, that is “human beings spinning on blackness”. According to Frank we are a lot more alike than we are different, regardless of our race, cultures or sexual identity. He chose to focus on what makes us all similar as humans, and if he revealed or confirmed something about himself that wasn’t clear to you in the process, then so be it. His sexuality wasn’t the point of the letter. The letter was about empathy and love. The letter was about being human. In an era were child-suicide rates were increasingly linked to homophobia and transphobia, especially in black and latino communities, Frank used his story to humanize those who had been historically demonized.
This letter birthed a chapter for Frank’s influence. When channel ORANGE arrived that following summer, these feelings of self-discovery through heartache and unrequited love reverberated all throughout the tracklist. The album itself was named after the summer detailed in his letter, the summer during which he first fell in love with another man. Frank dropping this album and his Thank You letter was powerful, valiant move. He cut through the lingering homophobia of the time and crafted a tale of perseverance and acceptance. This album allowed me, someone with completely different experiences, to appreciate his journey. He successfully detached himself from the increasingly materialistic world of the music industry and turned his art into statements that effectively captured the current state of the human condition.
There are two songs off of channel ORANGE that I believe are worth highlighting. The first is “Bad Religion”:
Taxi driver
Be my shrink for the hour
Leave the meter running
It's rush hour
So take the streets if you wanna
Just outrun the demons, could you
He said "Allahu akbar", I told him don't curse me
“Bo Bo, you need prayer,” I guess it couldn't hurt me
If it brings me to my knees
It's a bad religion
This unrequited love
To me it's nothing but a one-man cult
And cyanide in my Styrofoam cup
I can never make him love me
Never make him love me
Love
It's a bad religion
To be in love with someone
Who could never love you
I know
Only bad religion
Could have me feeling the way I do
This is a story of longing, of internal conflict and crippling self-doubt. With no one to turn to, Frank resigns to confessing his deepest, most closely guarded truths in the backseat of a taxi, and his thoughts betray the confidence that many of his fans may have prematurely branded him with. These confessional thoughts instead show him in his most fragile state, one in which he seems internalize years of homophobic rhetoric. The stigma that homosexaulity or sexual fluidity is a sin, is amoral, and requires prayer and absolution is so deeply ingrained in society that Frank doesn’t even flinch when the taxi driver basically tells him to pray away his desires. Instead, he chooses grasp onto the suggestion, wondering if maybe he should find a way to detach himself from the unrequited love that has brought him so much pain - whether through religion or drugs. This song is a heart-wrenching discussion of the internal struggle felt by Frank throughout the journey detailed in his letter. Frank’s lyrics expertly navigate self-hate and heartbreak, and his execution features a stunning vocal performance that evokes a deep, soulful pain that feels universally applicable to all humans.
The second song of importance would be “Forrest Gump”:
I wanna see your pom poms from the stands
Come on, come on
My fingertips, and my lips, they burn
From the cigarettes
Forrest Gump you run my mind boy
Running on my mind boy
Forrest Gump
I know you Forrest
I know you wouldn't hurt a beetle
But you're so buff, and so strong
I'm nervous Forrest
Forrest Gump
My fingertips, and my lips, they burn
From the cigarettes
Forrest Gump you run my mind boy
Running on my mind boy
Forrest Gump
I saw ya game, Forrest
I was screamin' run 44
But you kept runnin' past the end zone
Oh where'd you go Forrest
Forrest Gump
If “Bad Religion” - and “Thinkin’ Bout You” before it - were subtle allusions to his bisexuality, “Forrest Gump”, the penultimate track on channel ORANGE, would be the unabashed coming out party. In this song, Frank beautifully covers the timeless love story from the film, Forrest Gump, but through Jenny’s perspective - one that he clearly relates to on a visceral level. In the movie, Jenny and Forrest don’t end up together - but neither did Frank and his love at 19 years of age. In a very literal sense, Forrest Gump is used as a metaphor for a man running away from Frank - referring to the different paths taken by him and the man he fell in love - and this story is another example of unrequited love. But it’s uptempo nature and Frank’s equally light singing paints it in a much different light than “Bad Religion”. Here, there is no self-doubt and he seems to believe the experience of the fling was worth it. It’s the bright result of having grappeld with his emotions throughout the album’s more dark spots. This is essentially Frank fully submerging into his new lifestyle that he explains in his letter as being “a free man”. Similar to his letter, Frank is grateful for the man he fell in love with, regardless of the outcome.
Despite this album being such a bold statement on his part, highlighting him as an artist that will stand the test of time, I’ve always felt as if its slow and melancholic vibes represent a shyer, younger Frank Ocean. Since releasing his letter and reinventing himself as a free man, the outward projection of his confidence has considerably escalated. Four years after channel ORANGE the fans were finally given a second and third album, simultaneously: Endless and Blonde. I personally cherished these albums, not expecting any new music for yet another few years, but just as I was getting used to the idea of no new Frank music, he released a single on his Beats 1 radio show, Blonded Radio: Chanel. Chanel was released in March 2017, and I can’t think of any way to describe the start of the song, besides epic:
My guy pretty like a girl
And he got fight stories to tell
I see both sides like Chanel
See on both sides like Chanel
The Undefeated’s online music review of this song describes these first few lyrics in the following manner: “The boastful first few bars of Ocean’s new song might be the coldest, gayest, and most securely masculine flex in the history of rap. Elegant and mellow, the song’s lyrics read as a deliberate ode to duality and non-heteronormative binaries - an ambition, that since the death of Prince Rogers Nelson, is sorely missed in black music”. Whether I’ve convinced you or not, I truly believe Frank Ocean is an icon. He has made tremendous strides through his music and personal life and his consistently made choices that have positively influenced millions. As a visionary and genius, he’s stood out not only as a singer, but as a writer, a visual artist, and an activist.
Credit: https://www.gq.com/story/frank-ocean-is-peerless
#frank ocean#blonded#chanel#bisexual#genrefluid#genrebending#innovative#inspirational#artist#visual#activist#singer#writer#bad religion#channelorange#boysdontcry#lgbtq+
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Michael Seibel, president of the Y Combinator (YC), recently published an essay on the type of person startups make sense for. The original article is here: https://blog.ycombinator.com/why-should-i-start-a-startup/For context: YC is a prolific investment firm for very young startups. Reddit was accepted into the first batch of YC companies. Seibel is a successful entrepreneur now turned investor. From his experience and job role, he has many data points on aspirational entrepreneurs who make it, those who don’t, and most importantly, who those people were before we knew how they’d turn out.Language and ideas were the original “scaling platform”/software/meme, so it makes sense that YC would be interested in facilitating these platforms. Consequently, they also run a popular discussion forum (“Hacker News”) for people interested in startups and technology, colloquially referred to as “hackers”. Seibel’s essay was submitted to the forum for discussion and discussed heavily here: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=14806393. With ~280 comments and 500 upvotes in two days, it’s reasonable to say the post has struck a nerve.I’ll save you the effort of trawling through the comments (that’s my job), but the most frequent reactions fall along these lines:Loved it: Super motivating, I relate, let’s talk shop, tactics, mentors, tools, etc.Hated it: This article encourages hubris about one’s ability, most startups fail and need luck. Also, privilege, lots of money, lack of wife, kids, family, mortgage, yada yada.The ontologists: people who concerned with being. This is where the gold is.To clarify, most people genuinely shouldn’t try to start a startup. Preaching that kind of tactic based panacea is just as helpful as telling everyone to be “happy”.What’s useful about startups, however, is that they’re rigorously executed petri dishes of life experiments. Startups are defined by growth, whether its users, time spent on the platform, revenue, profit, etc. For our personal case study, if we substitute growth for the more neutral term “change”, startups become fantastic case studies to a certain type of existence, specifically, a dynamic one.Back to ontology. There is a key moment that got pushed to the bottom where Michael tries to respond to Q&A’s, and he has this insightful interaction:A: What's the origin of your desire to be better than all of your peers?MW: Because I realized that I could be betterB: In what ways? Sorry Michael, but I reject the idea that you can be 'better' than another person.MW: I should have said I realized I could be better at the game of high school student looking to get into a good college.Commenter B was looking for evidence that people in startups think they’re better than us plebeians. But give yourself a gut check of Seibel’s life and you can probably conclude this is unlikely. How’s that joke go again? Oh right.“Would you rather be a white woman or black male?”Though tech has gotten better and will continue to do so (proof: https://techcrunch.com/2017/04/16/stop-blaming-the-tech-industry-for-the-worlds-problems/), the reality is positions of power for men of color remain statistically abnormalities. On a good day, Seibel may have looked at his life and job and felt like the Obama of Silicon Valley. And for all the others, Chris Washington. Heck, that scene from Get Out might have been inspired by a hypothetical party I just made up where Billy Dee Williams/Lando Calrissian and Seibel bump into each other, and the two men give each other a wink and nod of camaraderie. “I see you brother, keep making cash.”Which is to say, it is unlikely for Seibel to have grown up internalizing that he was better than others. Read his original piece and this alternate hypothesis checks out. Now that we’ve set aside that interpretation, it begs the question: what did he mean to really mean?“I realized I could be better” reads very different if we read it as “I realized I could become Better.”Later on, when another commenter asks why the 3 constraints (1. underdog preference, 2. loves the thrill of poor odds, 3. Amor fati) that Seibel said were the preferred constraints of startup founders, he claimed no answer. After all, even Seibel won’t purport to have God-given Moses style tablets on the commandments of constraints that founders must have.With help from Nicholas Nassim Taleb’s “Antifragile”, we can conclude that all three constraints are great heuristics of the type of shock that biological systems benefit from. Cue the tape:“The bold conjecture made here is that everything that has life in it is to some extent antifragile (but not the reverse). It looks like the secret of life is antifragility. Typically, the natural—the biological—is both antifragile and fragile, depending on the source (and the range) of variation. A human body can benefit from the name Wolff’s Law after an 1892 article by a German surgeon. But a dish, a car, an inanimate object will not—these may be robust but cannot be intrinsically antifragile. Inanimate—that is, nonliving—material, typically, when subjected to stress, either undergoes material fatigue or breaks.We can use the distinction as a marker between living and nonliving. The fact that the artificial needs to be antifragile for us to be able to use it as tissue is quite a telling difference between the biological and the synthetic. Your house, your food processor, and your computer desk eventually wear down and don’t self-repair. They may look better with age (when artisanal), just as your jeans will look more fashionable with use, but eventually time will catch up with them and the hardest material will end up looking like Roman ruins. Your jeans may look improved and more fashionable when worn out, but their material did not get stronger, nor do they self-repair.”Seibel can’t write too philosophically, or he comes off as a mystical Internet cult writer. Once again, that’s my job. So let’s put it together.There is good evidence (Seibel’s data points as President of YC) to believe that, for a certain group of people, subjecting themselves to stress (in the form of unfavorable odds) is a desirable end goal. Further, we know that the indicator of living, organic systems is their system’s ability to grow from the right type of stressors: sprints in working out, not marathons; keeping a low personal cost of living so you can risk taking an unpaid internship at your dream company; etc. So what do this all mean?For people who are more Life than Death, starting a startup is a fantastic way of becoming who you deeply want to be. Be it warrior, saint or thinker, many of the commenters never realized that Seibel was writing an article about character formation. In fact, he explicitly refutes financial success as the basis of why he recommends starting a startup. But because of his need for propriety due to his status, he can’t outright and say “adversity will give you the opportunity become exactly the type of person you respect, leading you to respect yourself more and be more satisfied. This is guaranteed regardless of the financial outcome.”Why can’t he say this? Because there’s a non-trivial percentage of the population that is OK with “death”, living instead of Life. Fear sells much better than hope. And in their defense, even Taleb writes about this. Remember, most startup founders will financially fail, but the backroom secret is that most news fail to report the astonishingly high satisfaction rate (https://unsupervisedmethods.com/the-startup-failure-myth-b80fc4b6af45), even among “failed” entreprneurs, as opposed to the normal population’s job satisfaction (http://www.gallup.com/poll/188144/employee-engagement-stagnant-2015.aspx) The antifragility of the system requires individuals to be fragile. Barbells leverage means you need to have people manning libraries, fire stations and police departments vs. jetting off to Hawaii and crowdfunding video game playthroughs. If you’re willing to live like a pauper to do what you love, your self-satisfaction will be its own reward.The key is to choose with eyes wide open. Well, maybe a wink is fine ;)
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