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hoodwinkd1 · 3 years

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the stars that shine Ch 2

Ch 1 here.

Chapter 2: woke up to find that summer gone

Evangeline sat at the dark cherry desk in her bedroom, staring down at the piece of parchment which seemed to be staring right back at her. She had picked up a pen almost half an hour ago and had successfully written one line.

Dear Lys,

“Damn this!” Tossing the pen to the side, she stood and began pacing around the bed. Normally, her letters back to Caraverre were pages and pages of stories, filled with every minute detail and every silly joke that Lysandra and Aedion might enjoy. Tonight, she could barely get her thoughts in order enough to discuss what she’d eaten for dinner two hours ago.

Evangeline knew exactly who to blame for this conundrum. Hollin Havilliard.

Her first two weeks in Rifthold were amazing. Ever the social butterfly and lacking peer friendships back in Terrasen, Evangeline absolutely loved getting to know the other students in her lessons.

“You should come shopping with us next week,” Regina suggested, her smile genuine. As the third eldest daughter of the Callot family, the largest noble support of Adarlan’s fashion industry, Regina would certainly have good taste. “Anya and I are looking for springtime outfits.”

The other girl had jumped in then. “How long will you be staying? My parents always plan a trip to the country house right after the Spring Solstice and I can bring a few friends.”

So yes, Evangeline had no problem making friends. She was downright delightful and ready to try anything, go on any adventure.

Her lessons were equally wonderful. Part of the reason she came to Rifthold was to expand her education, filling in gaps that Darrow had no expertise in, and she enjoyed the challenge immensely.

Point being, she should have plenty to write home about. The shopping trip, the mathematics concept she finally mastered, even the amazing duck stew she tried two nights ago.

Unfortunately, the fond memory of her duck stew faded when she remembered what had immediately followed.

Dear Lys,

I had the most awkward night of my life. I’m relatively confident I’ve made my first enemy and I may never go back to the ballet after this traumatizing experience.

No, she couldn’t possibly send that. Aedion would charge into the palace and demand revenge at the mere thought of anyone disliking Evangeline, if he didn’t laugh himself to death trying to imagine the concept first.

Her popularity aside, she was still in disbelief. Hollin had approached her first, offering to escort her to the royal box at the Rifthold Theater for a travelling dance troupe that evening. Evangeline accepted (delightfully and more than ready for an adventure). She even dug through her closet for the stunning cerulean gown Aelin had gifted for her fourteenth birthday.

And then the prince proceeded to ignore her. All night.

“Who goes two entire hours without speaking one word?” Evangeline grumbled, moving towards her closet to grab a nightgown. The letter could wait until tomorrow. “Why bother inviting me in the first place?”

Whatever. She would be just fine with her new friends, who’s families also owned boxes at the theater.

----

“It’s been two days.” Dorian dropped into the chair next to Hollin. “Two whole days, and I haven’t heard a word from either of you. Quite rude, if you ask me, considering it was my idea to take her to the ballet.”

Hollin kept his eyes on the book in front of him. “Some people think it’s rude to speak in a library. And yet, here we are.”

The king sighed, as if his little brother’s social life was as draining as running a nation. “At least tell me if you enjoyed yourself. Or if you think Eva enjoyed herself.”

“The dancers were talented.” Hollin turned a page. “I can’t speak for someone else’s opinion.”

Dorian huffed. “I meant, did you enjoy spending time with her?”

Hollin shut the book with a bit more force than needed. “Do you have nothing better to do than force me to go on dates with your friends’ wards? I’m working on something here.”

“It wasn’t meant to be a date!” Dorian protested. “Just...Evangeline is so delightful. And friendly. I thought she could, you know, be a friend?” His words trailed off at the end.

He heard the unspoken words. Hollin was not delightful and not friendly. Dorian probably hoped this picture-perfect girl could change him, mold him into a better prince.

“She has friends. And I have work to do.” He looked pointedly at the book strewn across his lap.

Dorian, finally, took the hint. “Fine. Enjoy your suspicious research.” He stood up, fixing his tunic. “I expect to see you at the merchant’s council dinner tomorrow night.”

Hollin waved him off. “See you then.” He’d been searching for some excuse to get out of that event, some way to avoid all the grouchy, greedy men that tried to grab the king’s attention.

Maybe if he fell off a horse, he could avoid politics for a few days.

----

The two months passed quite quickly. Evangeline was expected home in time for Aedion’s birthday celebration, so she took the last day in Rifthold to search for a gift. He might grumble about her spending money on him, letting his annoyance over aging take over his usual good mood, but Eva knew he would secretly cherish something special.

Anya had offered to join her, commandeering her family’s carriage for the trip. The two of them, along with Regina, had become inseparable during Evangeline’s stay.

She had never had friendships that were entirely her own before, outside of her family’s vast and unyielding legacy. Spending the day shopping tasted like freedom and youth.

“Where are we heading first?” Anya asked, shifting her long skirt to make room for Evangeline to sit on the bench next to her. “What does one even buy for the most infamous General in the world?”

So maybe she never could fully escape that legacy. Evangeline chose to ignore the honorific. “Aedion? He can be quite the sentimental type. I was imagining some sort of calendar he could use; one that I’d add drawings and photos and secret notes to. Something useful, but still personalized.”

“Oh, thank the Gods. I was terrified you would drag me to some boring weapons shop.” Anya fanned herself in mock horror. “Minsky’s has the best stationery.”

Once they arrived, Evangeline lost herself in the rows of parchment. She adored the smell of the shop, somewhere between a library and perfumery, thanks to the variety of candles that lined the walls.

She wandered for a while, enjoying the feel of books, journals, scrolls, and other trinkets underneath her fingertips. Anya struck up a conversation with Minsky, the elderly owner who apparently had very strong opinions about what time of day one should light lavender candles.

Evangeline stopped in front of the rack she’d been looking for, eyeing the different color choices. Each calendar looked sturdy and durable, perfect for Aedion’s regular travels, but only a few had carrier cases. She selected the emerald one, to match Lysandra’s eyes.

“Oh that’s lovely!” Anya beamed as Evangeline joined them at the counter. “Very practical.”

Minksy nodded solemnly as they checked the price. “Smart child, finding a way to stay organized.”

“It’s actually a gift,” Evangeline corrected. “Would you have any wrapping supplies?”

They pulled out a few choices of paper, and the girls left the shop with the package securely tucked under Evangeline’s arm.

Anya opened the door of the carriage to let her enter first. “Do we have any other errands - Gods!” Her question was cut off with a curse. “Galen, you scared the life out of me.”

Evangeline found herself face first with Anya’s older brother. He shot her an apologetic look.

“I spotted the carriage and didn’t fancy a walk back to the house,” he explained, musing at his dark locks with one hand. “Any change you two lovely ladies want to go out for lunch?”

“You are unbelievably annoying,” Anya sighed. She moved to sit next to him, glancing at Evangeline. “What do you think? One last meal before you go?”

Galen turned to face her as well. “Leaving so soon?”

Evangeline hadn’t had many interactions with the older boy. Galen had danced with her at one of their parents’ parties, and had teased her a couple times when she joined them for dinner. But all of a sudden, Evangeline found herself wishing for some more time in Rifthold for an entirely new reason.

“I have to return to Caraverre tomorrow,” she informed him. “It’s my....it’s Aedion’s birthday.” Explaining their relationship was difficult enough, and easily avoided since everyone knew exactly who he was.

“Pity,” Galen replied. “But that just means I have to treat you to the best sandwiches Rifthold has to offer before you go.”

Anya groaned. “He always drags us to this tiny little place, when there are plenty of nice restaurants around.”

“A tiny little place sounds perfect,” Evangeline reassured. The carriage jolted forward, carrying them away from the main streets.

An hour later, she wasn’t lying in the slightest when she praised her meal. The sandwiches were really quite good. And the twinkle in Galen’s eyes when she stole one of his chips was even better.

“Oh goodness,” Anya interrupted as they stepped outside into the twilight hour. “I left my pouch at the table. Be right back.” She strode back into the restaurant, leaving Galen and Evangeline alone by the doorway.

Galen leaned against the stone. “Do you have plans to return to Adarlan?”

“Not in the next half-year,” Evangeline admitted. Her thumb rubbed the edge of her pointer finger, a nervous tick despite her calm tone. Was there meaning behind his question? “I’m due to spend two months with one of my mentors in Arran after some time at home.”

“Pity.” He offered her a light smile. She prayed to the former Gods to keep her face from turning pink. “Next time you come around, I’ll have to move faster. Ask you on a date at the beginning of your stay, instead of the end.”

Evangeline couldn’t hold back a wide grin. “Yes, I suppose you will.”

---

Hollin threw himself onto his bed, head spinning a bit from the wine he snuck during dinner. Evangeline was leaving tomorrow, a fact that wouldn’t affect his life much since Dorian had stopped forcing a friendship between them.

Maybe the wine was a mistake. The prince didn’t like alcohol much, knew he was far too young to start drinking, but insomnia had plagued him for weeks now. Hollin tried so many home remedies, from herbal teas to meditation, before attempting to drink himself to sleep that night.

It wasn’t working.

He still couldn’t force his mind to relax. Ideas for new experiments and inventions swirled around, mixed with memories of his most recent failures that stabbed him with self-doubt. Then came the childhood memories, the horror of being raised by the devil without noticing and the shame of past cruelties keeping him far from relaxation.

Hollin groaned into his pillow. He wanted someone to talk to. It was such a simple solution, one that most people would find easy. Dorian had even hired a specialist, a healer who worked with minds as well as bodies, for palace staff who needed help after a traumatizing war. Hollin had paced by their office more times than he could count, never entering.

Somehow, he fell asleep before sunrise. A sharp knock at the door yanked him out of restless dreams.

“Hollin?” He recognized Herina’s voice, one of his personal servants who was years past using formalities. Changing a baby's diaper gave one that privilege. “I have your schedule for the day.”

Hollin stood up, blindly feeling for the robe hanging next to his dresser. “Come in, thank you.”

She pushed the door open, pulling a cart of food behind her. “I didn’t see you eat nearly enough at dinner last night, certainly not enough to be stealing drinks of wine like you did.”

He opened his mouth to argue, but shut it quickly. “I - thank you,” he said again, too tired to form a better sentence.

Herina left the cart by the entrance and walked further into the chamber. “You have a couple lessons scheduled, one before lunch and one in the evening. Light day.”

“Not too terrible.” Hollin took the parchment from her. “Herina..” He trailed off.

“Yes?”

“Could you - do you know how to add things to my schedule?” he asked.

She nodded. “Of course. What grabbed your interest?”

He pushed past his discomfort at the idea. If he didn’t sleep well after, that would be the end of it. “Training. Physical, that is. I’d like to learn how to fight.”

Herina eyed him warily, no doubt taking in the lanky and awkward features that haunted most fourteen year old boys. “You know the king would never expect you to fight. He knows that isn’t where your interests lie.”

“I know.” Gods, he was blushing now. “It’s for myself, just a new hobby.”

Thankfully she moved on. “Well, alright then. Don’t be late today.”

With a final meaningful look at the breakfast, she left. Hollin thought about ignoring the food and falling immediately back to sleep, but his stomach chose that moment to growl loudly. He would need the calories if he planned to actually follow through with his new training idea.

If getting knocked on his ass for two hours a day didn’t help him fall asleep, then nothing would,

#tog #throne of glass #fanfic #sjm #evangeline vuolo #hollin havilliard #dorian #dorian havilliard

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childhoodgrave · 4 years

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I'm starting 2 play pathologic but I'm scared any tips for how to make the start of the game less impossibly heavy and mortifying (I accidentally started a fight got scared and restarted my game)

HI im typing on my computer this time bc i wrote likean essay long response to this and tumblr crashed instead of saving this also adding a readmore bc this will get long im sorry.. but thank u so much for sending me this ask i am so excited u r playing pathologic first of all!! i will format this in a numbered list so its a bit easier 2 read...

1. im assuming the fight u started was with the ppl loitering in evas garden, right? this is a v common problem new players face and an intentional obstacle left by the devs to teach u tht u shld avoid confrontation and fighting at all costs when u can help it. the fighting system in this game is intentionally difficult and u will usually die if u get into a fight if u dont have a gun. just leave the guys alone and let them stay and u will be fine. there arent any consequences to this so dont worry!!

2. starting and then restarting the game a few times when ur getting into it is very normal so dnt worry abt that!!! i had to restart my save like 3 times before i got the hang of things, so dont be discouraged. tht being said the game isnt for everyone so if u just consistently are not having fun w it dont force urself to play it!!

3. check out the settings page where it lists all the controls for the game, bc it will show you some mechanics the game nevr tells you about. use Q to open up your quest menu which will show you your overall goal, main quest, and sidequests. the main quest MUST be completed by the end of each day or there will be ingame consequences, so be careful. sidequests are less dire.

the I key opens up ur inventory!!

you press E to talk to people

the P key opens up ur status menu iirc. be sure to keep track of that too, but statuses will also pop up in the corner of ur screen when they get actually dire, too, so if u dont check it u wont be completely clueless dw!!

the L key opens up your letters menu. u will get letters from different ppl throughout each day and usually they pertain to the main quest at hand or a sidequest you can do so that you know what youre supposed to be doing each day. whenever you get a letter a spinning icon will pop up in the corner of the screen and the sound of a paper flipping will play, but the game never actually tells u abt it which is a big design flaw on its part.

4. pay attention to the time!! esc or q will pause ur game and pause the flow of time, but opening ur inventory wont. time is a super important aspect of the game so just watch out 4 that.

5. spend all your money on food on day 1. dont bother with eggs or lemons so much as meat, bread, fish, vegetables, and milk to a lesser extent. its important u do this on day 1 for reasons u will find out later.

dont worry abt keeping ur hunger meter completely low tho!! make sure it doesnt max out, but dont try to keep it empty, ull waste food very quickly that way and its a very important resource.

theres also an area in the game near where u start out that has some milk left out near a statue of a woman that you can pick up. raising ur fists in game will make a little dot appear to help you aim for things, and i always use that to focus on what i want to pick up because it can be very difficult otherwise. heres the area im talking about

6. check ur map frequently whenever ur going anywhere!!!! the layout of the town is intentionally confusing and u will get lost without ur map, esp because it shows u quest markers of wherever u need to go.

the walking in this game is also very slow and tedious. u get used to it but it is a feature of the game so just keep that in mind.

i used this map to keep track of where all the shops in town are because its a bit difficult to tell otherwise and can save time if u need to get stuff (like food and medicine. dont bother with clothes bc theyre honestly useless but clothing stores do sell needles which you should collect for bartering.)

7. bartering is a BIG system in the game and its actually what you use to get a lot of the items youll need. you can barter with pretty much every random npc you see in town, just press E to talk to them! different people will trade for different things and find value in different items, so just pay attention to that!

look in trash cans and bins located around the town to find useful things you can barter or use yourself, like water bottles. id recommend especially saving items that children will trade for like jewelry, flowers, needles, hooks, sharp objects (like knives and switchblades), and nuts. dont eat the nuts, trade them with children.

8. one child in particular will have an item called “schmowder” on her occasionally. theyre important for reasons that you find out in game later. if she has a schmowder, trade for it, and save it. it costs a lot so save up things this child will trade for. dont use schmowders on yourself, save them for later. the child looks like this.

unrelated but i just think this girls design is sweet. i like her dress :)

9. sometimes characters will give you items for quests. if your inventory is full, the item will drop to the ground in a bag with a thud. watch out for this and be sure to check your inventory and the ground to make sure you actually have the item you need to do a quest.

10. quests can be confusing sometimes, and if u ever feel lost i recommend checking the pathologic wiki for “the bachelor’s route” to find a guide about each quest that happens each day. OR you can just dm me and i can help u if u dont want to risk being spoiled!!! i dont know everything but if i dont know the answer i can just look it up for you since i already know the story of the game.

11. dialogue can also be confusing sometimes, so choose what you say carefully! dialogue trees that you can go back to are usually rare and dont actually happen that much. the dialogue system is also intentionally confusing and tricky. dont be afraid to reload a save file if you want to learn more or see what other dialogue options would have got you.

and thats all i can think of right now??? im sorry this is a lot, i promise the game isnt actually that difficult once you get used to it!!! its just a matter of getting used to the mechanics. lmk if u ever need any help at all :D

#pathologic #im so sorry for saying so much ...i rlly rlly tried to be brief here ok #the game RLLY RLLY isnt as difficult as ppl make it out to be #or at least the bachelors route isnt.

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monsterfanfic · 6 years

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Chapter 05: Guilty Pleasures of His

"Make sure you all study for Chapter Four's test. We will have a peered reviewed study guide discussion up by six tonight. Make sure you engage in the activity at least three times. That'll be it, have a nice day." Eva and Kelly looked at each other before packing up their things. The days to this semester seemed to be blur into one another as the time went on. Last week was officially the first of October, yet heat still somehow found its way into the New York streets at times. While Kelly enjoyed every second, Eva was more excited about the fall weather. Mostly because it's usually by the beginning of November, the students thin out by a few rows in the auditorium classrooms, taking away the noise makers and shit talkers. Then of course, the perk of hoodies, her favorite jackets, and boats. Thankfully with this being Eva's junior year, she had one issue to undergo to make this New York move worth the while. Being accepted into NYU's two-year Nursing Program. During her summer labs, Eva completed the required Health Education Systems Incorporated exam; praying with every click and written response she was doing her absolute best. During her last semester as a sophomore she started her degree related course, making sure to take those required courses in that year's span. "Ms. Reed, may I speak with you for just a moment." Semi-shocked and worried, Eva wanted to blurt out, no she couldn't. Since Antonio, Eva tries to stay away from Professor Martin. She doesn't know what she and Tonio have going on. It could be strictly innocent, or in his line of business. Eva isn't obtuse nonetheless, she knows Tonio has a dangerous edge to him. So, if her professor is involved; she rather not be in the middle. Then again, Professor Martin is on the decision board of the school's nursing program; so being rude is out of the equation. "Yes, ma'am." She nodded to Kelly, signaling her need to stay, and both of them parted ways. Leaving Eva seated at the front of the class, awaiting her professor's reasoning for wanting to speak to her alone.

"I’ve noticed that your last few papers have been nothing short of well-polished and critiqued perfectly. I want to applaud you for that. I've taught you almost every year you've been attending the university and I'm proud of your growth," Eva hadn't noticed how tensed she was until Ms. Martin started to speak. The words leaving her mouth, keeping her body in a frantic mode of wanting to relax, but still so uptight to what could be said next. "The board and I are reviewing your test scores and previous interviews. Plus, the paperwork you presented with your results. You're a bright girl; I hope I see you into our program." "Thank you, Professor. I appreciate your words." "No problem, Eva. I'm sure your mother would be proud. You're dismissed now."

"Wow, she said what again?" "I know." Eva was busy typing away at her computer, piles of papers from notes of her Fundamentals of Mathematics work spread out in front of her as she tried to make sense of her professor's assignment. Eva wasn't as much of a math wizard, as science. But she did better than the average. "She must’ve change. Martin is a true bitch. And not a bad bitch type of bitch. Just a bitch. You know, the kind of bitch that makes other bitches seem like angels." "I think I got it, Kelly." "No, I'm serious.....so does this mean you're accepted into the program yet?" "No," Eva replied, her fingers halting as the thought crossed her mind. It actually could have meant the total opposite. Maybe Professor Martin's words were a piece of her condolences to the fact the board members didn't like her. "It just means they are reviewing my papers and what not. They still must base everyone, then pick the top fifteen percent. After that is the top ten. Then if I fall in that pick, I have been accepted." "That's fucked," Eva cut her eyes at Kelly, already knowing the thoughts running through her head. She had them too. "What happens if you work your ass for that spot and don't get in?" "Become an LPN, but I'm not aiming for that. I could be a nurse's assistant. Even go to Nursing school, but I'll have to have my degree first." "You should've been a teacher like ya' girl. No worries, baby!" Scoffing, Eva went back to her notes and typing at her five-page paper on mathematics' in the property of medicines. They both knew better than to think that Kelly was getting out of the end of her deal, risk free. "Anyways," "Anyways my ass. Are you coming with us to the frat party tomorrow night? It'll be after the test. After all your worries." "My worries won't be over until I get my acceptance letter." Eva shot back. "Bruh," Kelly made her way over to her dearest friend, carefully pulling the book and papers from her. "Enjoy one weekend from work. Be a teenager." "I'm a grown ass woman, Kelly." "Then act like one and have a fucking drink and get some dick," Kelly fired at her, but then she smirked. "Unless there's something you need to fill me in on." Eva laughed, crossing her arms as she noticed she fell into Kelly's infamous hot seat. Her quick-tempered responses only railing her deeper into the lion's den. "What you getting at Kelly?" "C'mon, Eva......for the past week, you've spent more time in that phone than all the time I've known you, put together. Actually, at one time, you didn't even care for a phone. Now, I can't pull you away from it." She was right. Eva hadn't seen Antonio, but it hasn't stopped them from speaking and texting every day. From him sending some of the most romantic and sweetest text messages she's ever received. Eva still doesn't know much about the man in her life, but there's a feeling that he'll be around for a while. They'll have time to fill in their blanks, dot theirs I's and cross the T's. Not telling Kelly has been the most dreading, yet satisfying thing ever. She had something for herself finally and it felt good. Yet, as Kelly's best friend, these kinds of things are important to share because she surly can't tell Nicole. "You already know about him, Kels." "Stop lying bitch. You're keeping it to yourself." "No, remember the guy from the club? Got drugged, he took me home, brought me back?" "Oh, Prince Charming." Mmm? "Okay...." Shrugging, Eva accepted that. She could see the connections. Somewhat. "Well, he checked on me afterwards. Made sure I was okay and then asked me to dinner. It's been innocently building since." "Wow, he's truly Prince Charming. I gave him the nickname for manners, but damn, Eva. You probably found you one in this New York sea of millions." "Relax," "Nope. Tell me everything now you, heffa. I want details. Go."

Eva skimmed the titles of books. Her hands tracing some, her eyes roaming the others. None of which seemed fictional. The only thing catching her attention was Monster: The Autobiography of an L.A. Gang Member. She caught the title; remembering it from her favorite rapper, J. Cole, speaking on it once. Besides that, it too would have probably been unbothered. Walking to the L-shaped couch, Eva got comfortable in the den of Tonio's home, opening the book to the first page of the 400-page autobiography. Even with a test tomorrow, she was finding time to fit this in her schedule. Both the book and the man. What wasn't expected, how interesting Kody "Monster" Scott life was. So, fascinating she never realized Tonio sitting beside her until his fingers trailed up the zipper tattoo on the back of her thigh. "You like that?" "The feeling or the book?" "The feeling?" "It's relaxing kind of." "...And the book?" "Interesting," Eva said, turning to look at him. "Aren't you a crip too?" The question caught Tonio brought surprise, his fingers slowing down as he thought of his response; the answer she already knew. Eva figured it out during the ride back to her dorm last week; a blue bandana taking up the space around his rearview mirror. It was always there, contrasting against the deep red paint on his truck. "I am." "When were you jumped in?" "I was fourteen." "So what name did they give you? Since it seems everyone gets a lucky name." "Tone East," "Tone East..." Eva repeated his words as if she was trying to embed them into her brain. Forgetting his one rule. "Eva." "Sorry," Flipping the book back open, something crossed her mind. The thought of asking him and knowing what, just so she no longer worried ate at her. Empty minded she read at the words, interest no longer holding her to the topic as the scenario played in her mind. "Can I ask something else?" "Anything, Eva." "How do you know Professor Martin?" Smiling, Tone shook his head. That beautiful smile sucking her in as he stared at her silently. "Let's make a pack, Baby Girl," Tone started. "You don't ask questions, you don't think you can handle the truth to. I won't lie to you. I won't be able to. So, know when you ask me something from now on, you'll get the truth," Nodding, she knew then it was something she didn’t care to figure out. His words scaring her enough to continue reading. "It's strictly business, Eva," He finished off. "Nothing more, I promise you. I like you. As fucked up as it is, I do, so I wouldn't hurt you by playing with you, Eva." "Why is liking me so......messed up?" "Because I wasn’t supposed to like you."

#dave east ff #karrueche ff

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eilidh-loves-sj · 7 years

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Dear Yousef: Part 1

I wrote this after the clip on Sunday so please keep in mind that this story doesn’t take into account what’s happened since then. Please enjoy and any comments or thoughts are welcome :)

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Saturday 1:00

Sana lay on her bed in darkness as she pondered over everything that happened over the past week. Her mind had been all over the place ever since Noora had shown her Yousef’s messages. She finally felt like she had finally gathered courage that she needed to be honest with him about her real feelings for him only for him to tell her that he was leaving. She knew logically that two months was not forever but in her heart it felt once he’d left things between them would never be the same. After all the obstacles that been thrown their way to keep them apart Sana couldn’t help but feel that it was the universe’s way of telling them that despite what Yousef believed they were just not meant to be together.

Spending time with Yousef tonight as they had broken the fast had been one of the hardest thing she had ever done. Knowing that he was leaving and being around him was like having her heart broken a thousand times and as he’d said goodbye to the boys she felt his eyes on her. She wanted more than anything to hug and beg him not to go and just pour out everything that she had been feeling the past few weeks but she just kept her mouth shut and wished him a safe journey.

She wasn’t sure why but this movie that the girls had made her watch during one their sleepovers, Dear John. She remembered the girl in the movie writing a letter to her lover explaining her feelings towards him and ending their relationship. She felt that writing a letter to Yousef could help her deal with the pain of the reality of what her relationship with Yousef would never and the regret she felt even if she wouldn’t send it. So she opened up her messages and went back to unblock Yousef and opened her last message from him and began to type.

Dear Yousef

First I just want to say that I’m sorry for all the pain that I have caused you. I know that I should have warned you about Even being at SYNG and not interfered but I hope you know that I really was just trying to help, he really missed you guys and I know that you missed him too. Second I just want to say that I’m sorry that I’ve been sending you mixed signals and I want to be absolutely clear with you. I love you. Wow I think that’s first time I’ve actually said it, I love you. For so long I’ve felt like I’ve never fit in anywhere, I was always too Muslim or too Norwegian or not pretty or not fun enough but with you I felt for the first time I could really be myself. I didn’t have to hide behind anything and I felt like you really saw me. But when I saw you kiss Noora it broke my heart. It felt like once again I wasn’t enough. I thought you had just used me to get closer to her and I felt so stupid and embarrassed, that’s why I’ve been so cold towards you I wanted to protect myself from hurt anymore and I thought you didn’t really care. And at Eva’s party Noora showed me everything that you had said and I don’t think there are words to describe how happy I was. I wish I knew that you had felt the same way I do before. I was gonna tell you on Sunday but then you said that you were leaving I couldn’t do it. I’ve thought a lot about this over the past few days and I realise now that everything that’s happened is a sign that even though we care each other we’re just not supposed to be together. I know that one day you’re gonna find someone who will love you as much as I do and when you do I hope that you’ll be happy. If I don’t find that happiness than that’s ok I know that I'll be happy with whatever path Allah has chosen for me. Finally I just want you to know that no matter what happens I’ll always love you. Goodbye Yousef Acar and thank you for being my soulmate.

All my love

Sana Bakkoush.

As she wrote the message tears fell down Sana’s face and by the time she had finished she was sobbing. As she continued to cry she found herself slowly falling asleep and without even realising it as her phone slipped through her fingers. Her thumb hit the send button.

#skam #skam season 4 #skam fanfic #skam fic #sana bakkoush #yousef acar #yousana #sana x yousef

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evakfanficsrecs · 7 years

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Well, hello beautiful person. Could you please recommend me you favorite oneshots? Better if those are AU. I LOVE YOU by the way.

Well, hi you! :) Favorite oneshots, preferably AU (there might still be a few of CC there though, I couldn’t help it haha…), gotcha! This is gonna get pretty long, so be aware & read more below the cut! By the way, I LOVE YOU TOO, anon

The Way He Looks at You by anna_sun Summary: It first happened in the safety of Isak’s own bed, the cluster of butterflies that seem to clog his lungs when he really looked into Even’s eyes. They were laying mindlessly, limbs and hearts tangled into each other’s, the only effort required of them being when they wanted to kiss. Though, even that, in itself, was effortless. When Isak looked up, he was welcomed by the sight of Even’s full lips ready to be kissed, and he wasn’t about to kiss them good-bye. Every single time, he did it only with the promise of more. The lingering touches, the fingertips softly drawing patterns on warm skin, the kisses. They all meant the same to Isak. They all meant infinity.

Love, Isak by Avengers__x Summary: Isak writes Even a bunch of letters but he never intends to send them.

fire and ice by snowyderek Summary: “From what I’ve tasted of desire—” Even met eyes with Isak as he looked up from his paper only for a second and blushed before looking back down, continuing. “—I hold with those who favour fire.” It was silent in room other than the voice of Isak and the soft pitter patter outside of the rain. (or, Even falls for Isak soft words and their unknown meanings.)

Steal Your Heart by alijan Summary: An AU story of how Isak and Even met through Isak’s friends. Or, more specifically, a AU story of how Even chases after Isak and he lets himself be caught.

The Hot Muffin Thief by Bellakitse Summary: There is a magical muffin at the café where Isak’s buddy Jonas works. It’s Isak’s lifeline, he has it every day and then one day some hot art hipster steals his muffin.

flickered in my mind for only you by DarkBeauty_890Summary: soulmates!au; But even the lonely nights hearing his mom cry for his dad couldn’t stop Isak from tracing the words (looped, like maybe his soul mate was an artist or a writer) etched permanently onto his skin. He sat huddled under the covers for hours, flashlight illuminating the darkened space, allowing Isak to wonder who they would be. His soulmate.

True or False by iriswests Summary: childhood best friends!au; Seven moments between Isak and Even (+1 with Sonja), ranging from the ages of four and six to the ages of seventeen and nineteen, respectively.

And If In That Moment by allyasavedtheday Summary: Isak rolls his eyes and reaches for his beer again. Even’s teasing always feels different to his friends teasing him. Even’s teasing feels a lot like flirting. “Anyway back to Emma.” Fuck. “Why isn’t she your type?” Isak considers his options, considers a single conceivable reason why a straight seventeen-year-old boy wouldn’t like a girl like Emma. He can’t fucking think of a reason and it makes him panic but he’s also just- tired. So fucking tired of having to constantly lie about why he feels the way he does. So he settles on as close to the truth as he can get. “She just- I guess it’s never felt right.” *Or, what would’ve happened if Isak and Even had had the Halloween pregame alone like they had originally planned.

Love Me Harder by tech_ftw Summary: In which accidentally being added to a group text has unexpected consequences. Like falling in love.

Sideways and Slantways by iriswests Summary: Isak gets stuck in an elevator with the one person he’s vowed never to speak to again. This eventually prompts a conversation long overdue, but not without the memories flooding his brain like a broken dam first.

cards and drunken propositions by Bellakitse Summary: “Eskild, please tell me I didn’t make a fool of myself in front of Even,” Isak begs, groaning when Eskild winces theatrically. “Oh, god, what did I do?” “You mean besides rubbing yourself against him like a cat and started taking your clothes off?” Eskild asks tentatively, giving him a pitying look when Isak lets out a noise of death and mortification. “If it helps he seemed to be enjoying your…attention?” * Isak doesn’t remember the night before but he knows he made a fool of himself in front of this crush.

sickeningly sweet like honey by tomlinsoln Summary: coffee shop!au; Even likes to write pickup lines on Isak’s cup.

Cut Us Out In Little Stars by allyasavedtheday Summary: Romeo and Juliet!au; Even Bech Næsheim. The boy making Isak’s heart beat double-time in his chest is Even Bech Næsheim. He can’t believe he didn’t realise it earlier. Even doesn’t have any social media and any pictures of him in the press are usually grainy or leave his appearance partly concealed through sunglasses or a hat but still. A sick part of his brain almost wants to laugh because of course. It’s not enough for Isak to like boys when he shouldn’t, no, he has to go and like that boy. The one boy his father would condemn him for being with without question.

Love and other stories by littlemovie (Lejla) Summary: The guy in the picture had a black snapback on, which covered half his face, but what caught Isak’s attention was the sinful, plumb mouth half opened, the bottom lip dragged down by the guy’s thumb, his other fingers holding his snapback. A simple caption, Not Mags, but sure. And before he knew what he was doing, Isak had taken a screenshot of the picture and then he let out a sound, which he would never in a million years admit to. Linn looked at him from the other couch, her eyes disapproving. “You need to be quiet, Isak.” Isak’s wide eyes widened even more, and with a quick nod to appease Linn, he booked it to his room, his phone clutched in his hand. Or Isak accidentally falls in love over Snapchat and he doesn’t regret it.

Better With You by iriswests Summary: Isak and Even don’t know what they’d do without the other. Eventually, they realize they don’t really need to find out.

Please Know That I’m Yours to Keep by pressurerin Summary: hogwarts!au; “Remember how I was making amortentia for my final potions project? Well, Isak ate some. And now…” Even gestured towards the way Isak was currently trying to lick his neck. OR; Even accidentally gives Isak a love potion.

the region of the summer stars by thekardemomme Summary: flower shop!au; Someone keeps sending Isak flower bouquets and Even happens to work in a flower shop.

open the pod bay doors by iriswests Summary: Even’s trying to write a script for his class, Isak happens to catch a glimpse of the shit show, and they fall in love over a story of parallel universes.

The only thing keeping me on fire by diamondjacket Summary: massage therapy!au; This guy—this profoundly, unfairly, deeply good-looking guy—is going to…put his hands on Isak? On his thigh? And, like…move them around? Listen, he’s just starting to maybe, possibly come close to beginning to acknowledge that he might not be one hundred percent heterosexual, all of the time. It’s slow going—okay, fine, it’s borderline glacial—but he’s getting there. He didn’t need this today. Or: Isak’s doctor tells him to get a massage. Even delivers…and then some.

Would You Mind Closing The Bedroom Door? by allyasavedtheday Summary: The boy falters in the threshold, eyes widening when they land on Even. “Oh fuck- sorry! Eva didn’t say anyone was home.” Ah. No wonder she was up late last night. Even can’t really fault her taste – the boy is beautiful. He’s got golden hair mussed and curling over his forehead and cheekbones not even Michelangelo himself could sculpt and the most well-defined cupid’s bow top lip Even’s ever seen. Also he’s shirtless. Did he mention that part? There’s a stunning, shirtless boy in his kitchen with pillow creases still on his cheek and Even can’t do anything about it because he’s Eva’s one night stand. Fuck.

Afire Love by pressurerin Summary: Isak can’t seem to stay out of trouble. A hot firefighter makes trouble seem not that bad.

sweet creature (but we’re still young) by kittpurrson Summary: summer camp!au; Isak meets seventeen-year-old Even Bech Næsheim at Tyrifjorden on his fifteenth birthday. Or: the one where Isak tries to convince the boy next door to put his hands on him.

blow out all the candles by tarjeiandhenrik Summary: It’s Eskild’s birthday, Even works at a cake shop and Isak doesn’t know how to make tea.

we were made for garden by stomatoconveniencestore Summary: When Eskild announces he’s about to star in a documentary, Isak doesn’t pay him much attention. But once he accidentally gets involved himself, it’s not only the film he starts to care about, but also its director.

when your heart is bleeding, i’m coming to get you by cosetties Summary: uni!au; Isak doesn’t exactly expect his hookup from last week to be the love advice columnist at the school newspaper he’s working at. He also doesn’t expect to fall even harder for him than he already has, which is a shame, really, since Even’s crushing on someone else.

Forget The World by verlore_poplap Summary: Hence, Isak resigned himself to being the ninth wheel and consoled himself with the knowledge that Even was always good for some solid kush and he’d just light up for four days straight. The more he thought about it, the better it sounded in Isak’s head. Yeah. This weekend was going to be fucking awesome.

–A

#andie likes #anonymous #evak fanfics recs #evak fanfiction #oneshots #skam fanfiction #answered

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