#when i said i know what you are I DIDNT THINK STEPH WOULD WRITE A PLOT HOLE SO BIG THAT THE ONLY EXPLANATION FOR IT IS EVA BEING A LESBIAN | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lesvii · 9 months

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Wanted

Steph was in her apartment, this events takes when el sin nombre escapes from her prison jail, but in other circumstances as she looks for somewhere to lay low for a bit.

Original character cause i hate to put Y/N lol.

Also this is a F!reader for now i just feel comfortable writing wlw shit so..

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The door clicks as you open it, Steph was getting out of her third shift from the bar, serving alcohol to drunk and nasty men wasn't an easy job, but hey she got the money. She was so tired from this day, she irradiated a smell of faint tequila from her body, i think some men dropped some on her. Steph just didn't care anymore, getting a shower and getting ready for bed seemed more important than everything by now. As Steph closed the door with her feet, she went and looked for the TV remote in the couches as she found it she turned the TV on, as she didnt care what channel it landed on, she went to get herself a cup of hot water and some herbal tea Steph loved to drink when you felt extra tired. As the noises of the TV mumbles on your head she didn't pay attention to it, her eyelids forced to stay open as she poured the hot water into a cup from her kitchen, she stretched her body to reached the tall drawer up on the wall of her white kitchen to grab the bag of tea, as she pour it into the warm cup. As she grabs the cup to take a small sip, something on the tv catches her attention.

´´Citizens we have an important announcement to make, as you know the biggest drug lord in Las Almas has been captured but in the last 24 hours we been informed that she's now a fugitive, please take precautions, sleep with doors locked, dont go outside alone at this late in the night. As for the military we haven't received any news from them confirming this event.´´

Steph could see a imagine of the said woman appearing on the news, short black hair, brown eyes, intimidate look, she kinda look a little muscular as she find herself staring at El Sin Nombre picture with a smile, she… kinda looked like Steph type honestly, if it weren't for the fact she runs the biggest cartel drug she would for sure into her. Steph looks at the tv unamused brushing it off, probably just the channel wanting to make more views, lately the news has been field with a lot of junk, she grabbed the remote as a call incomes in Steph´s phone.

As Steph looks above her shoulder sitting in the couch she overlooks her phone ringing in the kitchen table behind her, she sighed as she gets up sipping her hot tea leaving it behind a small table besides the couches, she walks to the table as she reads whos calling, as she reads the name she knows its her best friend, what was she doing calling her up this late at night it was past midnight now.

Call Incoming Melanie

´´STEPH– did you saw the news!?¨ Melanie was practically screaming through the phone.

As Steph found her friend's voice irritating she turned the volume a little bit down.

``uh— yeah i guess i just did, what about it?´´She said as she passed through the space of the table to the couch, grabbing her tea as she walked through the kitching resting her body on the kitchen counter.

´´The shit everyone is talking about?!´´ Melanie replies.

´´uhh… elaborate please? I just got off a 12 hour shift. I feel like I can't think straight anymore..``Steph said rubbing her eyes, as she heard a faint giggle from her friend

´´Well i've never seen you think *straight*´´ Melanie said jokingly, as Steph is literally a lesbian.

´´ Haha, you're so funny…No but seriously what about it?´´Steph said as she started to get more curious.

´´The drug lord women???´´ Melanie said practically whispering at the phone, there was a few seconds of silence before Steph spoke again.

´´Oh yeah I heard something about she escaped and shit, but dont worry not even the military base has confirmed anything i'm sure is just fake bullshit´´Steph said as she took a sip of her tea.

It was getting cold by now, all the apartment lights were off and the only source of light was the TV in front of her and the moon shining from a window near the kitchen. There was a faint chuckle on the phone line.

´´ But you know she's kinda hot…´´Steph said giggling on the phone.

´´Oh my god Steph don't even start on this, get your lesbian ass off this WANTED woman and get someone, i was starting to think the guy that came to your apartment the other day was your affair´´.

´´Oh god no– the plumbing guy haha– no of course not… i'm only for women and women only´´. Steph said while she winked on the phone.

´´Hmmm… But you know she's kinda hot i guess´´Melanie said as Steph took a few breaths in and they both burst out laughing, she kinda needed this, Melanie always finds a way to cheer up Steph even in those bad bad days.

´´ I'm telling you… if she came out knocking at my door, the door won't be the only thing open for her´´Steph said chuckling as she whispered the last words. Her and Melanie stayed on line for a few minutes more until the clock hitted at 2:30 A.M. They said their respect goodbyes.

´´Its too late now girl, i should get going… good night dont let the sicaria fuck you in your sleep or you wont remeber it´´´

´´Haha.. So funny Mel, good night talk to you later´´.

Steph was the first one to hang up, with a faint sighed she put the cold cup of tea on the washer as she thought of washing some leftover plates from yesterday, but quickly washed it off as the tiredness started to hit her up with her yawning. She scratched her tired eyes with her hands as she kept yawning and strolls out of the kitchen ready to walk through the leaving room and go upstairs, but she quickly remembers she left her phone back in the kitchen.

´´Ughh…´´ She groaned as she took a turn to enter the kitchen again, and found her phone on the kitchen counter, she quickly grabbed it. She was on her back facing the entrance of the kitchen. Suddenly a harsh move of an unknown body is present behind her, a strong hand covering her mouth to keep her silent. Steph quickly began to panic. Who are they, she thought? She was facing the front view of the kitchen and the person was behind her, she could feel a strong arm wrapped against her face as they kept her silence, and… a chest? Of a woman?.

´´Don't scream, chula´´. A faint whisper came from this woman getting close to Steph's ear as she spoke.

Oh fuck.

#el sin nombre #valeria garza #valeria garza cod #valeria garza x fem!reader #lesbian #cod #call of duty #call of duty valeria #cod fanfic #cod modern warfare #cod smut

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inevitably-ineffable-husbands · 8 months

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Hi Steph, lots of love from Germany! 🩵💙🧡 In your reply to the switch theory you wrote that you think switching will come up later in s3 (instead of having happened at the end of s2. and I totally agree with that, the seasons theme was love, pining and miscommunication, that had to culminate in something 😂)

But yeah, my theory is that Aziraphale and Crowley will join/celestial-marry/ "merge/fuse"(??) in some way and become very powerful that way. (Although if they fuse probably not permanently) Because

a) they're crazy strong together

b)when discorporated in s1e5 Aziraphale says sth like "I wish I could inhabit your body, but we'd probably burst into flames" and I don't think that was a set-up for the switch in s1e6, because I think they didnt actually swap bodies just made theyre own body look like the other (I think?) Azzi's physical body couldn't withstand hellfire, right? So that's not happened yet.

c) didn't you write they started out as one character in the book writing process? And in an interview for s2 David Tennant said that usually Michael Sheen and him would compete for the same part and now they're playing the same character split into two.

...Thanks for coming to my ted talk. 😂 What do you think? Wishing you a very lovely evening! I really love reading your blog! It's so... cosy on here. AZ Fell's Bookshop vibes 💛🩵💙🧡

(Referencing this post)

Hey Lovely!

Firstly I'm SO happy you enjoy my blog! :) That's high praise to be compared to Azzie's Bookshop, oh GOSHLES!! Thank you so much!! I'm having a blast being in this fandom, feels like the heyday of BBC Sherlock, hahahh. I'm hoping this blog turns into another "light" success and people just come here to feel "at home" you know? LOL.

Secondly, yeah, having another think on the Switch Theory, now that it's been a couple months and more of my own theories have formed about S2, I lean more on the "not a fan" side of it. For me it's the erasure of the emotional impact and the IMPORTANCE of their miscommunication that The Final Fifteen gave us, and honestly, there's too many loose threads that just... can't work with that theory. After sitting on it for some time, the big one for me is that Crowley-in-the-car-getting-upset-at-the-music at the end makes NO SENSE if it was A-As-C; No one would be watching him, why continue the act? And Aziraphale's gentle touch-and-cry reaction to the kiss makes NO SENSE if it was C-As-A. I dunno. I can totally see why people support the Theory, but it's not for me. I'm a creature of "I need things to make sense" and too much DOESN'T make sense with it, is all.

And you're right, S2's theme WAS about showing us the development of their relationship, how important they are together, so that the end of E6 would DEVASTATE US, having us wanting more than ever for them to get back together. It was meant to show how truly made for each other they are, just they're two idiots sharing a single braincell and that braincell is emotionally dumb lol.

That all said, I have a similar thought as yours that I've been hemming-and-hawing about for a couple weeks after rereading my own theories to possibly clean them up a bit. While I DON'T think they will "merge" into one being, I DO think that they will combine their powers together in the penultimate episode to "win" (I say penultimate because I have hopes that the final ep will be them moving in together, but I know realistically, a climax can't happen an hour before the end in a story LOL).

BUT I also like your theory as well, because story-wise, the hints have ALREADY been dropped for it since S1, as you mentioned in your points A and B. There was no need for a switch, and I DON'T think it will happen again. BUT the purpose of the switch was to show that Crowley and Azzie's powers are COMPATIBLE. THAT is what's important here, and it sets up their Together Miracle in S2. And if we're going on the idea that in S3 they'll finally be in-sync and that they only get MORE powerful the more comfortable and "on-the-same-page" they get, well, yeah, I think Heaven and Hell will be wise to leave them be.

As for your point C, yes I did mention that, I BELIEVE in my BIG roundup meta for S4, but it might also be in my 'Crowley’s Past: Was Crowley Archangel Camael?' meta, since I recall doing a LOT of research for that, including trawling through Neil's blog for quotes. But yes, I actually recently saw the gifset with that interview, I think it's in my queue LOL. Neil did confirm ages ago, way back in S1 that early drafts of the book did have them as one character, which is why I think it's MORE likely that their powers are going to be combined instead.

Either way, I think the ONLY theory I absolutely am 100% against is the "they're going to become human" one, because I hate that the condition to their love must be "to love like a human they must be human" and that's just... UGH not on for me. I remain hopeful that that's not the route that their gonna go, since Gabe and Beez didn't become human, and it was a CLEAR mirror for the AziraCrow relationship (a foreshadowing of sorts).

And because I'm thinking of it right now and don't want to forget to write it somewhere, another thing that CONSTANTLY brought up is Alpha Centauri; I hope that they honeymoon there at the end of S3, it'll be a nice payoff for its constant referencing, LOL. And they can't do that if they're human LOL. I want them to spend the next 6000 years and beyond together <3

Thank you again so much for your ask!! Sorry I took a bit to reply, just got home from a road trip and I finally had a bit of free time to reply <3

#steph replies #good omens #good omens s2 #aziraphale and crowley's relationship arc #spoilers #switch theory #my meta #my theories #good omens meta #go meta #my thoughts

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quotidian-oblivion · 7 months

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Which of your Fics

Aaaaaaand another tag game which I found while binging through the writer tag game tag!

Which fic did you think would get a bigger reaction/audience than it got?

The most recent one - Greet Me With Open Arms cuz it was a requests fic where I asked people to give me dialogue prompts to use in a single fic. But then again, I posted it just yesterday. I'm just really excited about it and wanna know what people (especially those who put their dialogue prompts requests) think of it.

Which fic got a better reaction than you expected?

The Boy In The Cell, quite honestly. Cuz I thought people would ignore it due to how self-indulgent it was, but so many liked it! Thanks, you guys ^^

Which fic is your funniest?

Based on the comments, Phone Alarms. Quite proud of that one ^.^

Is your darkest/angstiest?

Ahh. Either The Boy In The Cell or There’s So Much Hurt (you can already tell by the title XD) These two cuz they cover darker topics like abuse and stuff. But if you count all the fics including the wips, then definitely this one wip i'm working on which is... pretty b a d. I mean, not the plot, the plot and characters and stuff is awesome! But in terms of rating the angst, its like- up there.

Is your absolute favourite?

Ahh. It depends on my mood, really. Sometimes I say My School’s Local Mafia Boss, sometimes Sometimes You Have To Find Your Own Genes, sometimes a couple of my wips (cuz fbhic i love the plots i've created for them like- bhfvifubhu). But right now? I'm saying I Feel More Than A Simple "Miss You" just cuz I put so much care into it, more than any other oneshot I've ever written.

Is your least favourite?

A Day In The Life Of Tim Drake. No hesitation. It's my first fic. Ok- sometimes, i am proud of it. But most times, nah. Cuz I wrote this on a whim bc i didnt like the thought of having an empty ao3 account and i did not think i would be actually writing fanfiction regularly. But here i am!

Which was the easiest to write?

I... don't know? I wouldn't be writing fanfic, or writing at all period. So I'm gonna say all of them.

The hardest?

As i said, I wouldn't be writing at all if it was hard so i'm gonna say non- NO. WAIT. THERE IS TWO.

Murder On The Stalker’s Turf and I Can See You. Cuz these were casefics and i was writing these while trying to get back into the flow of writing after a particularly hard and taxing writer's block.

Which fic has your favourite line/paragraph?

AHHHHHHHHHHHH WHY THIS QUESTION? DFHIUBF I'M SO INDECISIVE

OK. OK. SO I NARROWED IT DOWN TO THREE:

There’s So Much Hurt (both of them)

“You’re my son, Jason,” Bruce carried on. “Do you think that when you brought Tim over and started calling him your little brother, I wouldn’t start mentioning him as my son too?”

Alfred tightened the bandages that had loosened and continued wrapping. At some point, Tim whimpered loudly in pain and squeezed Dick's hand so hard that both their knuckles went white. Jason swept a strand sticking into his baby brother's eye. "I know. I know it hurts, Timbit. I'm sorry." "Jason," the little bird said weakly. "Ouch." Jason smiled smally. "Yeah, bud. Major ouch."

Let Them Be Siblings

Steph blinked twice again. Then she rubbed her eyes tiredly and muttered, "Lord, please bless me some fucks to deal with this bullshit."

which fic have you re-read the most?

My School’s Local Mafia Boss No hesitation. One, to refer back to it while writing the series. Two, cuz I write fics for me first and foremost and so i very much love this fic and reread it quite a lot. Three, i cant believe how much attention its getting! why- ohh that's why, yep. And four, I'm feeling nostalgic and I want to visit the place where I made most of my current friends.

Which one would i recommend to someone reading your work for the first time?

Phone Alarms ig? Cuz it's really chill and cracky and I'm really proud of it. But if we're including wips, then I would rec the Bruce Wayne Writes Fanfic AU first XD

the one you’re most proud of?

Isn't this sort of similar to the favorite one? At least it is to me. Still keeping this question if other people wanna do this question.

No pressure tags: @uncertainwallflower @sardonic-sprite @tristicorde @wakkoroni @blightwritesfic @pevensiechase @ah0yh0y @foursixtwonineoh-pieces-of-lego + anyone else who wants to join

#quotidian convos #writer tag game #which of your fics tag game #fic recs #dc fic recs

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gotham-rat · 4 years

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BRO since father's day is nearby, how would the batfam celebrate it with bruce and alfred (alfred takes care of them sm and deals with their shit on the daily, he's technically a father too imo!!) and how would they celebrate it when they're in quarantine and before when there's no quarantine?? I love reading your stuff anf it genuinely makes me happy and hope u have a great day! ^___^

this made me so happy!!! and wow it’s an amazing ask so thank you anon :)) here we go, it’s a pretty long one:

batfam + father’s day

bruce, without fail, always forgets about father’s day. it creeps up on him every year and every year he’s surprised by his kids. the very first father’s day gift he ever received was from dick-his second year of being robin. it was a very colorful card, with a drawing of a small robin and a big hulking batman. young dick also included 46 cents in change because he thought money was a very high end addition. bruce cried later, softly while in bed. he couldn’t stop thinking about just how much he cared for richard. his little boy. dick, of course, carried on the father’s day gift tradition. cards accompanied by long hugs, cheesy fake trophies for “#1 DAD”, awkward pictures of bruce on patrol in big frames, his gifts remained light, always poking a little fun. bruce keeps every single one.

jason’s first father’s day with bruce felt a little tense. jason wasn’t sure if he could celebrate it with him, he didnt know if bruce liked that type of thing, even though jason himself wanted badly to spend the day with him. so when dick showed up, bearing gifts, and jason saw bruce’s grin, he ran upstairs and pulled out a letter he’d written but wasn’t planning on giving. every year until his death he’d write bruce a long letter. post-death jason doesn’t usually show up, but leaves a small package on the front step every father’s day. it’s addressed to both bruce and alfred and is normally random things. a polaroid of him and a bad guy he tied up, a batman themed card deck, an old batarang he found in a street once, etc.

tim woke up really early his first father’s day, and replaced every picture in the house with one of bruce that had been used as a meme all that year. (it was him at a red carpet event, doing The White Man Pose, awkwardly facing the camera). every year he does something like that, TPing the house, putting googly eyes on the food, etc. bruce finds it absolutely delightful even though he pretends to be annoyed.

damian didn’t really understand the concept of father’s day, so upon waking up and finding the whole crew there, he was pretty confused. when he found out what was happening, he quietly excused himself and proceeded to cry in his room. he felt embarrassed and guilty for not knowing. he wanted to express his great love for his father but he had no idea how. bruce came into his room, quietly shutting the door behind him, and dami wrapped his arms around him and they sat on the bed hugging for a long time. bruce kissed the top of his head and said “thank you.” when damian heard that he asked “for what? I didn’t get you anything.” and bruce said “you’re here. you’re my kid. I’m thankful everyday for that.”

cassie punches bruce in the arm as hard as she can every year. she leaves a tiny fist shaped bruise that hurts way more than bruce will every admit.

barbara always swings by, and takes a pic of bruce and her own dad when she sees him, and then cuts each person out and pastes it together on one picture to give to both of him. on the back she writes “love you dads!” or “batdad and copdad” or “why do you both look so stiff? xx”

father’s day makes stephanie uncomfortable. highly uncomfortable. she certainly loves bruce, but doesn’t quite see him as the father figure most of the others do. she calls him every year though, at 6 o’clock on the dot. sometimes she cries. she thanks him and tells him she’s so grateful to have him in her life. bruce wants nothing more than to hug her, but he knows she doesn’t like being around him on that day, when her mind is filled with thoughts of her own father.

when it comes to alfred, bruce organizes the whole thing with his kids. alfred doesn’t really do much butler work anymore, but he definitely gets the whole day off, dami and bruce cook whatever he asks for, for each meal (and he likes to mess with them and ask for difficult things to make) and tim puts on a suit quite similar to alfred’s and talks with a bad british accent. damian likes giving him father’s day gifts and writing “grand” in front of “father” which alfred absolutely adores. he’s completely showered with gifts, in fact he gets more than bruce does. last year they distributed nerf guns and had a full pillow fort war with him. alfred kicked all their asses of course.

for quarantine this year, things were a little different. these members are quarantined in wayne manor: bruce, alfred, dick (he couldn’t be alone in his apartment), tim, jason (where else could he go), cassie, and damian. (stephs in cali and babs is self quarantining). dick got the wonderful idea of putting on a talent show for bruce and alfred, as a way of celebrating how well the two have raised them. it took a lot of convincing on his part, but finally everyone agreed. dick did a dance number that’s was entirely too long. tim solved not one, not two, but three rubix cubes in under a minute. damian did a little magic show where he was supposed to *cut* off jason’s finger and restore it, only he accidentally did cut into jason’s finger, and there had to be a pause in the show for jason to get gauze and wrap. damian is now banned from doing magic. jason reanacted the door scene in titanic by himself. cassie dares anyone to challenge her to a staring contest. she won everytime.

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bi-robins-club · 4 years

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jason had just settled onto his couch with a jane austen novel and his favourite peach iced tea when damian crept in through his window. he sighed internally and decided to simply ignore him. he had told damian to use the front door (nevermind the fact that jason rarely used the door) and more importantly? he was freaking comfortable. after a few minutes as jason flipped idly through the book, damian cleared his throat. jason sighed again, outwardly this time and reluctantly dragged his eyes up to his youngest brother. baby bat was shivering slightly from the rain outside and jason simply rasied an eyebrow as he sipped at his tea. scowling, dami stomped over to jasons bathroom to dry off. he rolled his eyes. how dramatic. damian was acting like he sentenced titus and alfred the cat to their deaths instead of how he was actually saving jason from deep cleaning his rain soaked carpet. (he was still going to deep clean the carpet the next time he tidied up but still)

when damian stalked back into the room, looking less like a wet, angry kitten and more like a dry, angry kitten, jason titled his head back and established eye contact.

"so what brings you over to my neck of the woods, demon spawn?"

instead of snapping back like jason expected, damian simply stood there looking extremely uncomfortable. he shuffled his feet, opened his mouth then closed it and sat next to jason on the couch he splurged way too much on.

"i don't know how to tell you this" dami began, hesitant "but i believe harper is experiencing thoughts of suicide"

jason jerked up, almost knocking over his tea (and what a damn waste that would be) before fixing damian with a look. he hadnt noticed anything different in roy lately but he knew more than anyone that depression acted strangely and was hard to pinpoint. his mind raced with thoughts of why roy might be suddenly suicidal, from a sudden relapse to not getting a happy meal toy included in his 3.99 box of clogged arteries. "why do you say that, damian?"

"i have been keeping an eye on his health since he became a close confidant to you and last night he said something worrying that i am still not able to parse the meaning of" jason smiled lightly at that, in damian speak he was basically declaring that he cared for roy- if for nothing else than for how happy he made jason. still he shook it off and asked what roy had said that was worrying dami.

"he was patrolling last night" jason knew that. roy had been picking up his patrols since jason had a nasty leg wound. it was the reason he wasn't out tonight. "and he was on the phone with an unknown person, though i am inclined to believe it was either Starfire or Canary" okay, still not surprising "and then he said that the only place he could die happy was between your thighs" oh hello blue screen. yes jasons mind was in the middle of rebooting but could you hurry it along? he almost missed what damian said next. "not only does he wish for death upon himself, he wishes for you to give it to him!"

"damian" jason managed, frantically trying to figure out a way to explain to his baby brother without including his sex life. "uhh its just an expression"

damians face brightened up slightly. "really? he does not wish to smother himself between your thighs?"

"yeah, its like...like just a way to say... mind your business? mmhmm" he struggled to get out, pulling an explanation out of his ass.

"you have told father to mind his business a thousand times but i dont recal you ever using that one. is it new?"

oh god. jason would rather die again than continue this conversation.

"uhh its only used if you're close to someone" jason didnt know what he didnt wrong but dami's eyes widened in clear worry. "i thought you and father were reconnecting? has something happened? are you fighting again?"

well shit. jason had not thought this one through. fuck roy and fuck his mile wide kink that centered around jasons thighs. he was going to kill him. and he wouldnt even use his thighs. "oh nonono dami we're fine, just not as close as me and roy" he hedged, pleading to gods he didnt believe in to stop this conversation with whatever means necessary. strike him dead if need be but *please*. damians eyes narrowed "and exactly how close are you with harper, jason?" jason stared in disbelief. how had his nice relaxing evening turned into such a shitshow? damian was fine with roy when he and jason were just friends but now that he was (correctly) assuming a relationship, his over protective instincts were kicking in? christ. he remembered how when dick and babs finally started dating (again), damian seemingly lost all respect for her and called her an evil harlot more than once.

thankfully he was saved by answering in the form of the best person jason had ever met aka duke thomas. he announced his presence by awkwardly coughing. jason met his dark eyes and mouthed 'help me' over damians head. duke smiled as if it was getting pulled out of him by torture but nodded.

"hey dames, dick wanted you to join him by the docks when you finished up here" damian scowled "cant you see i am clearly not finished yet"

"hah, well dick was facing up against scarecrow and i think he needed some back up but you know him"

"yes, he wont admit he needs help when he very clearly does" damian sighed "very well, ill go check on dick. you stay and question jason. " and with that damian clambered out the window and after he disappeared from sight, jason threw his head back to stare at his ceiling and groaned. duke laughed at him.

"hey daisy duke?" duke grumbled at the nickname and jason cracked a smile "how did you know i needed back up?" duke winced and ran a hand over his dreads. he made a face and jasons soul was slowly draining out of his body. "oh haha funny story" duke rocked back on his feet and faked laughed "damians com was still connected to the channel" jason froze.

"who was on the channel oh my god" duke smiled thinly and his hand paused on his head. "other than me? everyone." jason buried his head in his hands and let out a high pitched whine. duke consolingly rubbed his shoulder. this is why jason loved him. he hadn't even laughed at jason like tim, dick or steph would or started plotting death like damian started to. he and cass would just offer support. jasons favorite brother and sister right here folks. duke sat down beside him

"listen. i know what it's like to be outed when youre not ready and when i heard damian grilling you about roy, i thought i would help" jason turned and stared at his brother. duke was staring at his hands and avoiding eye contact. "i got caught with a boy when i was 15 in high school. its pretty shitty to be gay and poor in a homophobic neighbourhood but its worse to be gay, poor and black." jason knocked shoulders with him. "if you tell me the name of whatever asshat outed you, I'll shoot him for you." duke let out a waterly laugh. "they kept bullying me for being gay but if they even listened, they would have realised that im pan" he joked "its a completely different thing after all". jason snorted

"that was horrible"

duke winced "yeah, it was wasnt it. im bad at this" it was jasons turn to avoid eye contact now.

"talia once caught me with a league operative. a male operative. i was so paranoid for days until i caught shiva leaving her rooms. i got the courage to tell her i was bi and she just patted my cheek and asked how my training was going."

duke huffed out a laugh. "bruce gives you shit but i for one think your lesbians moms are cool"

jason laughed with him "just wait until you meet Ducra. shes a badass"

"ducra?" he questioned with a weird look. "how many moms do you actually have? i knew about diana and your assassin moms but thats a new name" jason burst into laughter at the expression on dukes face. "its not fair man. steph is the only other one with a mom and you have four! you need to share" jason choked on his laughter and shoved duke.

"first of all, its only *three*. ducra is like my badass abuela"

"dont you already have a badass grandma? have you forgotten about Ma Gunn? she threatened to shoot bruce in the dick last week!"

"yes well excuse you i need strong female role models in my life, fuck you" the two of them continued to joke around for a little while longer before jason caught a flash of black kelvar outside his window and sighed. duke followed his eyes and smiled before patting jasons shoulder and pushing off. "have fun with the one strong male role model in your life. im going to see if cass needs help" both of them knew that cass wouldn't need help but jason accepted the excuse for what it was. "me and steph are still coming over to study tomorrow. college is kicking my ass and i need you to explain this English assignment to me"

jason scoffed "im not writing your essay for you"

"eh worth a try. bye jace" duke gave a two fingered salute and slipped out the window. jason took the brief reprieve to sip his tea and mourned when he discovered the ice had melted and watered down the peach taste. for the third time that night, someone crept into his window. oh well. third times the charm right? jason wasn't going to acknowledge bruce until he said something himself. it was a repeat of damian. jasom read his book as it got increasingly uncomfortable.

"jason."

"bruce" jason drawled, not lifting his eyes from his book. bruce grunted like the neanderthal he was and jason finally huffed out a heaving breath before marking his page and looking up. bruce looked supremely uncomfortable. actually his face looked exceedingly neutral but jason knew how to read bruce and that was the brow furrow of how do i deal with jason without fucking it up? jason was well famailairsed with that one.

"you know i love you" jasons own eyebrows rose. bruce only said 'i love you' like four times a year tops. and he usually never wasted it on jason. bruce deflated at whatever face jason must have made. goddamn it. this was why jason always fought with bruce with his helmet on, he couldnt control his facial expressions for shit. "no you dont know that." bruce smiled thinly and to jasons suprise, quickly crossed the room and knelt, placing his hands on jasons shoulders.

"even if you dont believe it, and its my own fault that you do and i hate that i ever caused you to even doubt my love for you, i swear that i do, jay lad" jason was completely frozen. he had expected bruce to yell at him for letting roy go unchecked on patrol last night and how irresponsible he was yada yada, not this declaration of feelings that he had no clue how to deal with. he couldnt remember the last time bruce called him that. it had to have been when he was still in those scaly green panties and pixie boots. and not the adult verison that jason picked up from a halloween store on a whim just to see roys eyes.

bruce sighed and drew jason into a hug. when bruces shoulder started getting wet, jason was horrified to realise he was crying. "i wanted you to know that i wouldnt love you any less for loving a man. but you have to know that i love you in the first place for that to happen" bruce said self deprecating.

"shut the fuck up" jason said sniffling and gripping his dads back. "i hate you"

bruce laughed softly at him before pressing a kiss to the side of jasons head. "i want you to know that i expect roy-and you- over at dinner on sunday. i need to meet the man that stole my babys heart" he murmured. jason laughed wetly "youve already met roy, you just want to con me into actually coming to family dinner"

bruce smiled "that was before i knew you two were dating. roy needs to know what hes getting into" jason leaned back enough to stare into bruces eyes and weakly punched him in the chest "dont threaten my boyfriend. he refused to look at me for two weeks after t was done with him" bruce sighed longingly "its times like this when i remember what caused me to love talia in the first place."

"bruce!" the aforementioned man laughed and hugged jason tightly before stepping back a few steps. "Sunday dinner. you and roy. 8 pm." on a whim jason reached out and snagged bruces hand. "hey" he started, swallowing "you wanna stay for a while? we could watch a movie or something" bruces eyes softened and he nodded. "let me change out of the suit."

and if roy had crept in after patrol only to see jason napping on his dads chest to a shitty action movie playing in the background and took several pictures, well that bruces fault for not waking up when roy stumbled it. (nevermind the fact that bruce had every single one of those pictures saved on his phone) (nevermind the fact that after roy put his phone away, he was greeted to the sight of batman glaring at him as he twisted a batarang around his fingers. it was sorta ruined by the fact that jasons curls was hiding the lower half of his face but roy was still adequately terrified)

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woahajimes · 3 years

Note

gurl i wanna know your answers to *all* those questions please

bet

What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?* mmm jayroy and kogane/moniwa i s'pose

Are there any popular fandom OTPs you only BroTP?* jayroy for this one too and maybe batcat? like not brotp but idk i dont ship them // asanoya, kuroken ( i mean i do ship it but im not invested and havent read many fics but i definitely see why its a ship but also they're friendsss)

Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion? i once blocked a buncha ppl that i didnt even follow bc they said shitty things about astrid arkham while i thought she was cool

Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?* as long as they're not incest/pedo ships then i honestly don't mind any ships

Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?* uhhh i don't think so? maybe yja birdflash

Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?* not really but i have starting shipping pairs bc of fanart and stuff (konbart, kagehina, sunaosa, atsuhina)

Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?* like in fandom?? or irl?? bc uhhh ?? ill think about it lmao

Have you received anon hate? What about?*y ooh yes and they're all stupid asf (one about tim, another about steph, a bunch about me, and a few about timkon)

Most disliked character(s)? Why? mmm older jon in certain writings, everything in the 2003 tt run (specially cassie i just can't stand her idk her character was butchered and its not HER and it pisses me off), and uhhh for hq i don't have any in particular. i love them all.

Most disliked arc? Why? hmmm??? i don't knowwwww/ none come to mind lmao but i hate a few i know this (im sure there are a bunch of posts of me professing my hate for arcs n stuff) -- edit: the one in which seijoh my beloved DIDN'T go to nationals like 🙄 the fuck was that one about amirite

Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why? A BUNCH. LORENA AQUAGIRL, GARTH MY BELOVED, miguel <3, that one kid in the 50s batman issue, simon baz, jessica criz, jesse chambers <33 they're not disliked but underrated // for hq its komaki my beloved (like it's all ''pretty setter'' this and ''pretty setter'' that but he's NEVER INCLUDED like smh) ALSO SHIBAYAMA AND INUOKA OMG I LOVE THEM SO MUCH AND KANOKA --again, just underrated (not a SINGLE kanoka playlist. shame.)

Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why? mmm?? teen titans from the n52

Unpopular opinion about XXX character? aroace agender jason todd

Unpopular opinion about your fandom? lmfao dc was my first fandom (interacting-with-fandom fandom) and it's all "fuck dc" this and "fuck dc" that so when i enter new fandoms i gotta bite my tongue bc immideately its "i know ur characters better than u, [author]! you suck!" but noo

Unpopular opinion about the manga/show? l5ve it

If you could change anything in the show, what would you change? i'd let seijoh go to nationals... everyone gets to go to nationals fuck you

Instead of XYZ happening, I would have made ABC happen… nah

Does not shipping something ‘popular’ mean you’re in denial and/or biased? i don't get the question bc im tired and have no brains <3 but sometimes i go "i am NOT going to feel this way about XX character because everyone else feels that way about him (read: i will NOT be a jason simp bc everyone's a jason simp anyways -- disclaimer: I AM NOT)

What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom? no <3 --edit: b*tcest shippers

What is the purest ship in the fandom? UHHH harlivy <3 i won't say PURE but yes i love them (ALSO AQUAFLASH) // aofuta, yamatsukki, iwaoi, iwasuga!! (listen. there is lots of angsty fics with them but pls.)

What are your thoughts on crack ships? crack ships as in,,, never interacted in canon ever?? bc if so yes

Popular character you hate? no (joker)

Unpopular character you love? SO MANY OMG. eddie from tt03 (only good character to come put of it i swear) and a LOT more from dc i swear i only love the most unpopular characters and theres NO content so ughh // yes 100/100 all of them. from haikyuu i love all of them

Would you recommend XXX to a friend? Why or why not? yes 1000/1000 if i like it ill recommend it but also sometimes i wanna keep things to myself and for ME but i always end up recommending lmfao

How would you end XXX/Would you change the ending of XXX? hm? no

Most shippable character? uhh dick maybe?? yes def also akaashi and iwa (and oikawa and samu and literslly everyone also daichi and-)

Least shippable character? jason and asahi ... whoops (jason bc i hc his as aroace lol) also like arthur curry like :/

#i will elaborate only if asked

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thebluenebula · 4 years

Text

So todays my birthday so I figured I'd write a birthday fic for Ashleigh. I really enjoyed writing this. This take place about three to six months after she arrived, so she is much more comfortable around the Batfam.

Masterlist

The Day After (Coming Soon)

Birthday

I sat at the breakfast table, reading todays paper. I never really read them. I just skimmed through them until some picture or crazy headline caught my eye. Bruce sat across from me.

"So." He loudly said.

I looked up from the paper. "So?"

"Sunday."

"What about Sunday?"

"It's your birthday."

"Oh." I was genuinely shocked. It didn't feel like a year had passed. I guess when a lot happens, you don't notice the time go by.

"I was just wondering what you wanted to do for it?"

"I don't really want to do anything." I explained.

"Really?"

"Yup."

"No party?"

"Yep."

"You're only eighteen once Ashleigh."

"And I'm quite content not to celebrate it."

"Alright." Bruce looked a little disappointed. "How about a gift, what kinda gift do you want?"

"Gift." I looked at Bruce with genuine shock. "Bruce you've literally given me everything I could have ever needed in the last six months."

He grinned. "Thats my job."

"I dont need anything else."

"I know you don't need anything, but so you WANT anything?"

"How about my own house?" I joked.

"If you want one." Bruce replied, deadly serious.

"No." I quickly responded. "I'm not going to get kicked out am I?"

"Of course not."

I sighed with relief. I may be about to be eighteen but I'm in no way prepared to be on my own.

"If I was going to kick out any of my kids, don't you think Dick and Jason would already be gone."

"What's this about me getting kicked out?" Jay asked as he walked in.

"Don't worry Jay, I'm not kicking you out. Yet." Bruce assured him. "Just making a point."

"Wait," Jay leaned against the table. "I understand why your using me as an example, but why would you want to kick out Dick?"

Bruce shivered. "I have heard him say things I never wanted to hear any of my kids say."

"God." Jay yelled and slammed his head into his hands. "I'd repressed that memory."

"What happened?" I cautiously asked.

"Well there was this one time Dick and Wally were fu-" Jay began to explain.

Bruce elbowed him. "She does not need to know. No one needs to know."

I looked at the two curiously. I wonder what Dick and Wally got up to.

That night before I lay into bed, I looked at the photograph on my locker. Siobhan, Sean, and I. We all looked so happy. It felt odd, this would be the first year I'd have a birthday without Sean, and the first in years without Siobhan. I grabbed the photo and lay into bed.

That Friday I was lying on my floor, texting Cassie. "Artemis seems crazy."

"She can be, thats why her and Jay get on so well. So it's your birthday Sunday. 🎉🎉🎉" She text me.

For a moment I wondered how she knew, then I remembered that it was on my Pixtagram account. "Yup."

"You doing anything for it?"

"Not a thing."

"No party?"

I wish. "Not much of a party person."

"Dick or Steph will through you one regardless."

"Bruce made Dick promise not to and I don't think Steph even knows."

"Wait you didnt tell them its your birthday?"

"Nope. Only Bruce, Alfred, and Kate knows and I'd rather keep it that way."

"Okay, mind if I come around tommorow? We can just hang out or something to not celebrate you're birthday."

I giggled. "That'd be awesome."

"How's 12 sound?"

I yawned. "That'd be awesome. If it's alright, I'm going to go to bed."

"Goodnight Ashleigh. I'll text you in the morning."

"Night."

I was asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. Cassie text me the next morning and we confirmed are meet up. A little after one Cassie arrived. We got to togetehr with a couple of the other kids and played video games and chatted for hours. Cassie had to leave in a bit so the two of us headed up to my room.

I sat down on my swivel chair and Cassie plopped onto the bed. "So any idea what Bruce is getting you for your birthday?"

"Nothing, I think."

"Nothing?"

"Well he asked me what I wanted but I couldn't think of anything else I could want"

"Maybe you could ask for a car and give it to me." She joked.

"You can fly though."

"It would be a tad questionable if I FLEW to school."

"Point taken."

"Speaking of gifts," Cassie pulled a wrapped box out of her bag. "Since I won't see you tomorrow."

"Cassie you didn't have to."

"I wanted to."

I took the box from her. "Thank you. Do I open it now?"

"I'd prefer if you did." Cassie said. "You can't imagine the amount of thought you have to put into getting a gift for the child of a billionaire."

"I'm not picky." I explained, then pulled off the wrapping paper. A photo frame. A blue frame surrounded by little clouds and bats. "Cassie, its adorable."

She smiled. "The clouds were already there but i stuck the bats on cause... you know."

"Yeah, I know." I smiled. "I love it."

"Well I seen that you had that photo by your bedside and thought you might use this frame for another. Maybe you could put like a picture of everyone in in it or something.

"I don't have a picture of everyone in the house together. That'd be nice."

"That's it!" She exclaimed.

I jumped. "That's what?"

"Your birthday gift. Ask Bruce for a picture of you all together."

"I'd love that but I'd have to blow on a hell of a lot of candles for that wish to come through."

Cassie laugh was interupted by a ding from her phone. She checked the phone. "Diana's outside, I've got to go."

"I'll walk you out."

We headed down to the entrance. Cassie opened the door and prepared to leave. "I guess I'll see you again Ashleigh." She said as she stepped out the door.

"Cassie."

She stopped and turned. "Yes?"

"If you aren't busy tommorow... maybe you like to come around."

She smiled. "I'd love to."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I'll remember to bring those extra candles for the wish."

I laughed. "I'll need them."

"I won't forget." She promised. "I'll see you tommorow then."

"One other thing, when is your birthday?"

"Why?"

"So I can remember to get you that car."

She giggled and walked down the steps. I wonder if Bruce would actually let me buy her a car.

I got up early the next day and to my delight. No big deal seemed to be made of my birthday. Dick, Bruce, and Alfred wished me a Happy Birthday but that was it. Everyone else seemed clueless to it.

Around eleven Cassie arrived and her, Carrie, Harper, and I ended up in the den playing video games again.

About one Bruce dragged me out of the den. "What's up?" I asked him.

"Someones here to see you."

"Who?" I asked as we stepped out into the hall.

"Hey Ashleigh." Kate stood just inside the door. Arms open.

"Kate!" I hugged her. "I didn't know you were coming today."

"Thought I'd surprise you, considering it's your birthday." She ruffled my hair. "Happy Birthday, by the way."

"Thank you." I smiled. "How'd you know?"

"I always know."

"Bruce told you?"

She nodded. "Bruce told me."

"I felt it was necessary." Bruce added.

Kate held a box. "A little something."

"Thanks but you didn't have to."

"I know, Bruce said that. Which is why I distinctively ignored it."

Bruce scoffed. "I shouldn't be surprised."

Kate looked to Bruce then back to me. "I'll hold on to it for a little while."

"Sure." I looked to Bruce skeptically.

"Follow me." He said.

I followed Kate and Bruce towards the Dining room. "Where are we going?"

"I just want to say, that this was primarily Dicks idea." Bruce said.

Oh no. I already knew what this is. I put on a smile as we walked through the doors into the dining room. It was decorated to the nines with birthday banners and other colorful decorations. Sometimes I hate Dicks insistent to go over the top with everything.

"Happy Birthday!" Everyone yelled as I entered. I smiled at the large gathering of people. To say I was uncomfortable was an understatement. But just for a second. Before, when I had parties, it fwlt like a lot of the smiling faces were just that, smiling face, no genuine emotion behind them but not this time. This time the smiles held happiness, love. I could feel it

All the nervousness I should feel, melted away. I don't know of it was Kate's hand on my shoulder or the smiles of my family and Cassie.

I was quickly tugged to the table by Steph. In front of me sat a large chocolate cake. On it, there had to be about fifty candles. "I told you I wouldn't forget." Cassie smiled.

"Come on!" Dick shouted excitedly.

"Can't we just skip that part?" Jay moaned.

Dick ignored Jay's remark and burst into song. "Happy birthday to you!"

Dick was quickly joined by the others, even Jay mumblwd along. After the song was over, I blew out my candles. Downside of so many candles, took quite a few blows.

"So what'd you wish for?" Steph asked.

"She can't tell you, that ruins the wish." Dick said.

"I didn't wish for anything." I said. "I have everything I could ever need."

Damien scoffed. "Corny. You sound like Grayson."

Cassie nudged me. "Do it."

"Fine." I sighed. "I did wish for something."

"Anything." Bruce said.

"I wish for... a photo. Of all of us. Together."

"That's all?"

"That's all."

"That's doable." Bruce turned to the kids. Jay and Damien in particular. "Isn't it."

Jay sighed. "Just this once."

Damien scoffed. ""Yes, as Todd said."

"I shall get the camera." Alfred stated.

"No need I have one here." Steph said, handing a camera to Alfred. "I have been capturing every moment of this."

"At this point, I'm surprised you don't take pictures of us sleeping." Tim remarked.

"Maybe I do."

"I'm double checking the locks in my door tonight." Duke commented.

"I'll always find another way in."

"You are the creepiest blonde I've ever met." Jay said. "And thats not a low bar."

"But you love me for it."

Jay sighed. I turned to Alfred. "You're not going to be in the photo?" I asked.

"Someone must take the photo."

"I can take it Alfie." Cassie said.

"I will allow you to take this photo, Miss Sandsmark, on one condition."

"What's that?"

"Never refer to me as Alfie ever again."

"Fiiine." Cassie snagged the camera. "Now go join them."

"Okay," Bruce said. "Tallest to the back."

Dick, Kate, Bruce, Alfred, and Jay stood at the back in that order. Damien, Babs, me, Harper, Carrie, Duke, Steph, and Cass stood in front.

Dick picked up Damien. "Let me go Grayson!"

"Chill out." Dick said as he placed Damien on his shoulders. "Don't want you cut out of the photo.

"This will suffice." Damien huffed, pretending to be upset.

Steph turned to Cass. "Pleaaase."

"Sure." Cass lifted Steph onto her shoulder.

Bruce smiled at his children and place an arm around Alfred. I felt Kate place her hand on my shoulder.

"Say cheese." Cassie said.

"Cheeese!" We all shouted as Cassie snapped the picture.

We all walked over to her. "How's it look?"

She through an arm around my neck. "Smile."

I looked at the camera in surprise as Cassie snapped a picture. "What was that about?" I asked as Cassie let go of me.

She shrugged. "You needed a photo of us."

She handed me the camera. I looked at the photo of us. Cassie looked perfect but I had a look of absolutely confusion plastered on my face. I smiled and looked at the family picture. Everyone looked perfect in it. Even Damien and Jay were smiling. The camera was quickly passed around everyone as they looked at the photo.

Afterwards we cut the cake. I could tell by the way that Cass and Steph watched me as I took the first slice, that they had baked it. "Best cake ever." I said after I took a bite. The two girls had huge grins plastered across their faces. The cake was quickly devoured by everyone.

A pile of gifts sat on the table from each of the Batfamily. I figured I'd open them later and we went to play party games. For a moment I thought they be boring but the look on Tim's face when the donkey tail ended up pinned to his back, courtesy of Steph, proved me wrong.

Eventually we all lay up and watched some movies. By eleven everyone was clearly knackered. I could barely even keep my eyes open. Carrie was sound asleep against Bruce and most of the others weren't far behind. I was almost asleep when I felt a small weight on my shoulder.

Cassie looked half asleep as she leaned against me. Maybe she was asleep, just with her eyes open. I couldn't tell.

"Is she asleep?" I heard a voice ask from behind me.

I looked over my shoudler. Diana stood in the open doorway. "Diana." Bruce slid out gently from under Carrie and stood up. "I didn't hear you come in."

"I knocked. I assure you." She said. "No one answered, so I let myself in."

"Sorry, Miss Prince, I was preoccupied." Alfred stated.

I hadn't even noticed Alfred in the armchair in the corner. Jay was curled up beside him and appeared to be sound asleep.

"No worries Alfred."

"You've come to pick up Carrie. I assume." Bruce said.

"Yes. I'd leave her here but I promised her mother I'd bring her home tonight."

"Of course."

I shook Cassie. "Wake up."

She looked up at me groggily. "Huh?"

"Diana."

She sat up straight and looked to Diana. "Oh hey."

"Time to go."

Cassie stood up and stretched. "Sure, I'll juat grab my bag, i think it's in the kitchen." She turned back to me. "See yah Ash, and Happy Birthday."

I smiled. "See yah."

Cassie and Diana left and I looked back at the TV. I didn't recognise the movie that was on. I didn't even know who picked it. Slowly I drifted off to sleep on the couch.

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alloveroliver · 4 years

Text

Author Interview

I was tagged by @peacheat and @dear-mrs-otome THANK YOU GUYS!!! (I also added more Qs if you want to answer those as well *sweats*)

Name: Ash Knight

Fandoms: Now: MLQC, Ikemen Revolution, Ikemen Vampire, Ikemen Sengoku, Mystic Messenger, annnnnd one or two other otomes I like lol. Want to do in the future: Obey Me (Currently playing) Ikemen Genjiden (translating got to be too much but its GOOD!) Tokyo Debunkers (when it comes out in April!!!)

Where You Post: Mostly Tumblr but also Ao3!

Most Popular One-Shot: By far Victor x MC “In This Moment.” I’m glad cuz I spent a lot of time on this one and I love the concept of Victor stopping time because he know’s he’s going to miss MC <3

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: Mmm, I don’t have any muli fics yet BUT I do have 10 chapters of my blood thirsty fics! they are all oneshots though.

Favorite Story You Wrote: Its actually my first Oliver fic I posted around Aug of 2018 (Omg have I been doing this for that long???) It needs to be rewritten BUT heres the link. Oliver x MC “Giving Up Control” I still think about this fic often lmfao. Femdoming Oliver is 🤤👌

Story You Were Nervous to Post: Ooof, a recent Oliver fic. Only because it had alcohol themes and smoliver asking her on a date. Just due to his curse and things I didn't want to change too much but it was all consensual with adult Oliver. I was just nervous some people would read into it and take it the wrong way :( Oliver x MC “In A Perfect World You’re Happy With Me” (Looking back at it, it actually got a good response! I am surprised cuz I posted it then tried to put it out of my mind lol. #thanksanxiety

How You Choose Your Titles: First thing that comes to mind. Song lyrics, one word that sticks out in the fic. Or if its a common word or a word/title I’ve used before I put it into One Look Reverse Dictionary and find a similar word that means the sameish thing. I don’t dwell on titles too much tbh.

Completed: Last I counted, I had over 500 short stories under my belt. You can read them all on my blog but not everything was put into my masterlist. This was just due to the tumblr purge we had and I had to make a new masterlist since a lot of my fics got shadowbanned due to the tagging system back then. I didnt wanna repost them all lol

Incomplete: I have an entire spreadsheet that I plop all my ideas on... and it is FULL. I organize it by fandom, suitor, and fluff vs. smut. Ummmmmm.... See below: Coming soon lol.

Do You Outline? I usually start writing when I have an idea and if I need to step away from my computer I will do a quick outline. AKA just some quick bullet points of what I was thinking would happen next lol. If I ever take the time to properly do a full outline, I 100% go off the rails and do my own thing away from the outline. I am what is called a ‘discovery writer’ lol. I discoverer my own story as i write it then go back and edit it and act like I knew what I was doing all along lmfao.

Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: I have 3 substantial WIPS (like 2-3k words) I bounce between that I’m working on. Victor x Mc, Vincent x MC and Faust x MC.

A plan to do part 2 of Gavin x MC’ s ”Distortion” .

I also have an long running AU fic with Gavin x MC (8k currently) but that is far away from being done lol.

There is also an 11 chapter fic I am planning. I have 2 chapters written but I cant seem to figure out one major plot detail and its keeping me from getting it done anytime soon :(

There is a chapter fic im writing for a cradle born MC, however its a mesh of our MC and my OC and its kinda complicated. Also its fluff and I’m less interested in writing that BUT I really want to share this story <3

Valentines day is actually prob going to be the next thing yall see from me tbh and that is TBD

Do You Accept Prompts? I used to every once in a while but I have so many WIPS and no personal computer at home rn. (SOON THOUGH!) So I don’t have the chance to write as much in my free time as I used to. I’ll take prompts but I let them sit in my ask box until I am able to write them <3. I am not the person to ask people to stop sending them, cuz I like to see what yall want me to write and take that into consideration for sure. I like taking asks for Thirsty Thursday (even if its not thurs, I will hold onto them until then) and answer them 😍 I love those because more people are involved other than me and I like being a part of something bigger than myself 🤗

Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write: My Victor x MC story. Its UMMMMM........ ITS SLOW BURN YALL. LIKE WHO AM I?! lmfao.

*(I am going to personally add a few questions to this tag that I am interested in knowing about others as well lol)*

What do you use to edit?: I pay for Grammarly (its AMAZING even the free version is super worth it)

For word meanings, synonyms, and better wording I use OneLook Reverse Dictionary ALL THE TIME for every single fic. (and like I said before, to help with titles)

When I feel like something is off and grammarly doesn’t quite know and I don’t know, I put the fic through Hemmingway Editor. It tells you HOW readable a sentence is. If its hard to read I rewrite it and make things a bit simpler for the eyes. Its free in the browser.

Writing setup: Ideally, the sun is coming in through the window, It’s cool inside, I’m wearing a fuzzy sweater, I have hot coffee or tea, and my head phones are in.

I listen to lofi music station on youtube but If its distracting I put on lofi without lyrics. I love THIS playlist. (this is live so it’ll prob break but here’s an alt link to their offline playlist) If I am in an upbeat mood I like “Electropose” music. Or I listen to the ‘setting’ a fic is in. Like if its raining in the story, I put on rain ambiance and things like that.

Do you use a beta reader? No 😬, not really. Anytime I have someone beta read and they comment on the content and not the editing I get way too nervous to post the fic and suddenly it get sick to my stomach laskjdlsdj. I trust a couple gals to beta read in an editing mind set but I don’t bother them all the time. I like to go balls to the walls and trust grammarly, post the damn thing, and bite my nails hoping for the best.

Where do you get your writing inspo?: Bruh, #1 READING! Reading books, reading fics, reading summaries for things. Also, reading the routes in otomes, watching anime, and letting my mind wonder lol. I also like to chat with people on discord and let the stories unfold. Inspo has also come from a lot of my dreams tbh. My dreams are hella vivid and I try to write them down when I wake up if they are interesting lol.

Can we get a quote from an upcoming WIP?:

[ Without cars and crowds, the evening wind picked up nothing but serene sounds. Crickets gently chirped and leafs quietly brushed one another. The branches rustled together, making an organic symphony that the wind carried up to the balcony you leaned on.

*****’s warm hands ran up and down your forearms, warming your chilled skin. From behind, he bent forward and nipped at the shell of your ear.

“Is that better?” His silky hands moved faster, creating heated friction.

“Mmm,” You relished in the sensation. “Much better.”

His gentle chuckle against your pulse made you wiggle into him. ***** pressed his solid chest against your back and sighed. “Maybe if you were wearing more than just my shirt, you wouldn’t be so chilly.”

“I just want to be out here for a moment. The fresh air is nice.” You pressed your lips together into a small smile and angled your face up to him. “Don’t you agree?” ]

tagging: @somethinglacking @pseudofaux @tarralin @steph-writing @kiarigirl @otonymous @jennacat84 @xathia-89 @toloveawarlord @moonlit--river @thequeenshuntress @thirstyforbishiesimagines <3 Honestly I want to tag more people but I don’t wanna be annoying SO if you do this feel free to tag me cuz I am soooooo curious about other writers! Lets be friendsssss <3

#ash speaks #ash ask meme #fanfic writing #this post is shadowbanned due to links

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bountifulwitcharchive · 6 years

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I thought I would talk about stuff in my life a bit, especially considering I keep getting rattled by anxieties and taken a back by feeling as if I am hurting or harming someone.

As an adult I take it as my responsibility to make sure my actions are concise, I feel this is how any adult should ultimately be. Whether or not who I am as surefire as I am, hurts someone by accident. Whether it is that my opinion makes someone upset ; I want them to know I am not changing who I am yes. But that I do still care about them. If I fail to do this, then i feel as a person I have failed. Whether this is because of trauma in the past, or stuff that people from online communities made me feel. It does not matter, ultimately this is where I am at in my life.

My in real life is hard. I dont talk about it because I have, and the end result is always the same. This contorted feeling from others who dont know how to answer and feel uncomfortable themeslves. Knowing they cannot do anything, and my own discomfort that they cannot relate. Cannot understand. Cannot know what it means like -- I often hear ‘ Is it better today? ‘ Rather then, ‘ Are things stable today? ‘ I hate that people often feel my household is a place where things can be healed or feel better, that is not the case. My household works on whether things are stabled and held together vs Anyone having gotten BETTER. The job I am getting into now deals with this , and a reason why I applied for it was because I understand. I understand so much what this means and how people who do not have members of family who are disabled like this, dont understand. Every day is a struggle. It is a challenge, but it is so normal what I understand and come home to. However, simply because I am use to it and accept it does not make the stress of it any less then how heavy it is in my heart. Because ontop of my sister being disabled and us lucky that she is communicative. My mothers health is getting worse; in terms of worse she is getting old. And her poor choice of eating. Her inability to take care of herself and having to take care of another adult for themself--mind you for the rest of their lives. Takes a toll on her. And then my brother is getting worse, hes a smart boy where doctors are realizing he too is disabled. However, imagine being told you are disabled at 13 but consciously aware of what that means ( my sister ) and afraid of what you will become. Without going into details; if anyone in this household would kill themsleves it would be him. So ontop of hiding knives from my sister. We have to hide anything ( the surplus AND VARIETY of medicines my sister is on ) away from him. While also avoiding serious conversations of our home structure struggling as to not spike his anxieties. He will self harm like crazy. And its hard watching your little brother slam his head against the wall because he is overwhelmed by the world he was born into. I have many siblings, but my sister steph who is the only other person who lives with us does nothing for herself. I am sure she has issues her self but does not speak of it. And instead sits at home. Falling more and more into imo a depression that my mother just calls and berates her for being lazy for. I keep trying to push her to branch out but I can tell how this life effects her individually and that there is something there she doesnt wanna talk about. And I cannot reach in there to help. For my other side of the family, Where my stepmother who i discovered the other day doesnt realize or remember or care to understand that the reason i fell into depression at 18 was because of what she did . And now I have to compress my memories and ask myself if my abuse was real -- or is this another one of those ‘ Manipulators conviently forgetting to forget the abuse they did in the past to cling onto the future they have now. ‘ By all means fine, she is a mother and needs to focus on that, but for me. Who endures. And endures. Staring at someone who did nothing but break me into who I am today, and hear that she forgot. Or doesnt understand. Or doesnt know. Like to her the past was nothing, did hurt. But forgive we do because what else will you do in points in time --- people online think your own feelings are so valid that you need ruin the world around you to make it worse. But no. Sometimes. You need to accept things for what they are, and think that me in a situation where I cannot change things. Or amend if the issue is brought to light -- to focus on what I can. For my sisters. So I can see them. And for myself. So maybe one day in the future, that conversation can come to light. But for now, we deal with what life gives us and we move on.

That is why that job was too much for me? Nothing had order .everything was a mess. Nothing was put together well and often people blammed the lowly coworkers for the faults in the system if it meant they did not have to get introuble. Then we look as if we do not know what we are doing and exhaustion has hold of it. The system in place reminded me too much of abusive circumstances. I did not have a voice. My back was always in pain. My feet was always aching -- none of this mattered to them and none of anyones complaints ever reached them. They valued their own problems over everyone elses around them, and I understand everyone is dealing with so much but seeing management value their own complaints over others was horrible. Considering Iwent into this with such a promise. With so much of who I was feeling like the brightest light about to conquer something new--the last of my hope in life. Thinking I was gunna change my life .Change my world. Offer my family something better. Something knew. Only to find out the truth of that all; that the Manager coaxed the employees there who I was . Was to be horrible. To tell her what all the coworkers were doing. So she could write them all up and -- so with that purpose and picture in mind to them. They rallied together to put me on probation and everything that I was broken to tears, realizing that--trying hard to tell myself I mattered more then what people made me out to be. Because when I salvaged my self to befriend them all -- to at least face them and figure out why they did that to me. That this was my job life for a year and a half. Lmao? And did that I did, and learned so much about what went on I had... And overwhelmed by this picture of how they lived and treated each other. I wanted to leave. And left I did, but into a situation that was just far worse. Never in all the years of retail I have worked have I ever endured such hell like I had with these customers. And some of it I dont blame them, the store really made them feel this way especially when nothing was right. Nothing as good. And nothing worked. Regardless the complaints I had of this I was stressed and nothing I did and nothing I got from this job gave back to me. None of it but stress and being exhuasted and finding myself stripped of who I am. ANd I tried with my quiet feelings about myself, to say things. I would say “ No I am miserable. “ And say it so flatly and awkwardly to make a point, but everyone always made a joke about it despite how flat I would remain. And then compare, “Well at least you arent management.” Nothing I said got through to them, and I tried. I promise. I tried with attempts despite how hard it is for someone like me to open up.

So yes I left and the job I have now is not something that is easy, Nor do I expect that my stress to be any less. Rather that it pays more and I am with endurance to try something new that might offer me better future opportunities and worse comes to worse -- I find a new job.

Even as this all went on I made sure my life here was as easy for me to come to as it was. Imagine. Imagine.

Just imagine.

If I was truly enduring all of this . What about everyone else? I looked at everyone like this, I looked at what I went through day by day and thought -- What if they have it worse. If I have no heart and mind to talk about what really goes on in length in my irl day by day... What if someone else is just the same? It is not for me to ask. it is not for them to say.

I geniuely wanted to be at peace with everyone online, and if something went on that was so bad by their action. I truly believed; well you cant be as bad as my Step Mother or physically bad as my sister who I deal with day by day. That is to say, I have no interest in detailing my past.

Im pretty sure its obvious my past does paint my anxieties and issues with how I deal with things. Approach people day by day.

And its important for you to know that, to know that I am like you or anyone else. My desire to be positive and happy is to allow for you and everyone else to feel and be surrounded by positivity in life.

Life is really hard.

Hell, right now I am still going through more impersonal feelings while trying to dance my around all this going on. Because even as im nearing 27 -- almost 30 years old. I still realize things about myself, and it will hit me hard. The most recent and most eye opening realization that still rattles me and probably is the reason why. I feel flippant in my anxiety ; is realizing I gave 5 years to my life to someone who did not exist. This person went by the name Logan and roleplayed Snow from FF13. I realized ; I spent 5 years of my life giving myself to this person. This person who did not exist and catfished everyone around me. Including me. Making people believe I was obsessed with him. Making people believe that he didnt treat me as if the private things shared between us were most intimate. That I spent 5 years waiting for him. Giving myself to him. Being patient for him. Enduring anything he said and taking my feelings so that I revitalized the things I did. Said. And would approach and appreciate him more understandingly. So he didnt hurt me, or ignore me--that he took so much from me. Money. Drawings. My writing. So much of my attention and love. He took 5 years away from me that I could have given someone I actually was so in love with and still am. That acted mildly the same -- but actually had stuff going on-- I am and was so in love with that person. And All I could give him was consciously a year until everything that I felt with Logan came crashing down in remembrance. That I didnt even realize why I was really overwhelmed by it all until some how talking to a close friend of mine about everything really. Really hit me hard.

5 years.

I think.

5 years was stolen of me. 5 years of love. 5 years of who i was. 5 years of dedication. Of loyalty. Of patience. Of endurance.

I could have been a different and confident person who really believed in love and not riddled with anxieties that made me remember everything I put effort into didnt matter -- because this one person would make sure of reminding me what my actions would fall under.

Life is really hard, and day by day I still learn things about myself.

And I just think, if you are still reading this. That you too are going through this. And that someone you know is going through this. And that we are all going through so much of this or more. And I just hope you are alright and that you are hanging on there because I want you to know that I am trying to. Very hard. To live and I dont want you to give up either so please hang in there with me.

That is why when the group of people who often harass my community when they do not like someone.

Yes the same group every time.

Had finally had me in their sights its was overwhelming, I had thought wow -- this is what you ultimately came to understand from me? When I had tried hard to reach out to you. To be your friend. To consciously find a place where we can be together as people comfortable -- but no thats not the point I want to make.

It rattled me that it took people who knew nothing about me, to change the course of my environment just like that. I lost the hand full of people from that community I talked too . A friend I had been friends with since I was 17 . Simply because they were scared of being caught in that fire too. It was less about who I was, and more about them losing the safe haven they had. The fun group and comfort they had-- they did not want to lose that.

And I understand that. Im not mad at that, just concerned. Sad. And reeling in the fact that people can ultimately take things from each other with misplaced context. And the unfortunate circumstance that people will opt for this, instead of talking to one another.

So I am tired yes.

Because that happened, that whole thing happened while I as dealing with so much. And I had no answer for it. And that me talking about this is to tell you how effected I am by my life right now. And that it indeed upsurged my anxieties more uncomfortably so and not that that is bad or good. It merely is what it is.

And that as I am now, I am sorry. I am sorry and grievanced because I went backwards and am not as timely with things as I use to. I have been struggling to sleep, and when I wake up feel a sort of touched exhaustion that makes me feel like not getting out of bed.

I am sorry since I cannot roleplay things most often for others that I would love to explore. That my interests as of late have been : what would make me laugh to roleplay. What would make me feel wholesome to roleplay. What can i say to talk to others? What can I do to connect with others?

My mind and interests as of late is more about; making myself feel better and coping through what means I can through roleplay or just talking rather then. Having fun with my hobby like I had been the past few months.

This is why alike on Gawain, my compliant is coming online and constantly seeing him hash’d negatively. In truth I deal with negative things on a day to day basis... I did not want to have it follow me online. If I post about it, then clearly I have left myself open for those things.. But often I dont and am trying to mind my business and roleplay leisurely when things erupt.

I am really sorry, because ultimately, I failed as a friend and as a fellow roleplayer. My talking about it is to correlate the truth but also to let people know how I am as a person. Even still.

I feel sometimes people think you know, ‘ Oh hey Sheep just excuses things. ‘ Rather its just Im a different kind of person from a harsh road of life and I see things a lot differently.

For this I will explain with a more literal example,

Things that many people feel uncomfortable online. I myself cannot-- it is that merely I cannot. If someone is talking about something regarding their character that they were abused sexually and want to explore the meaning of this through roleplay. I do not find this insulting, I find myself glad. If people can find out what it means to have been sexually assaulted, maybe they can also connect with me too? And understand why its hard for me to expose my body ( or how overly okay I am to do so ) or how feeling /sexy/ can be a hard feeling for me to overcome. I often see people mistaking things or not handling it correctly, but I want it to be done rather then ignored. Or treated like it doesnt happen. For an adult, this is how I separate my reality from fiction. But find a connection from my reality into something fictious. Further, as an adult I want to help people understand that difference. It is very bad to feel gratified and pleased by subjects that are distasteful. But seeing it treated as if it cannot be spoken of discomforts me. This is a public place, but it is also a place where you control the content on your blog. By the end of the day, I will pick the things that will make me feel uncomfortable or wont make me uncomfortable.

With such a short example, I dont know if anyone read this far. I had hoped. And hope. These feelings can help others or really understand where I am with my life right now and how stressed out I really am. I cannot talk individually with people because I actually choke up. I have ADHD and often forget if I dont take it slow. And can get overstimulated by the fact that someone is merely listening/paying attention to me. I am quiet about myself because I dont like wide attention.

But that.

The past weeks I have had such support in my life.

And I am trying not to cry thinking about it, but I have such a healthy circle of friends and I would do anything to see it through that it lasts for years to come. Me speaking like this is because of this. Because of the comfort. Because of my desire to reach out and branch out comfortably. To remind ppl of my life, and to apologize for where I am not most prominent and may suck at show casing things for.

I probably will make a more positive post in the future about how everyone has helped me through so much -- like I am just a cup that is spilling about and everyone is trying hard to keep whatever is coming out from falling on the floor--s uch a silly analogy but really.

I am so thankful as much as I am apologetic.

Thank you guys for giving me a home where I most need it. It is why I want to be open and communicative. I want the place I come home to, that I enjoy and need to cope through things going on. To remain okay, to be alright, and that positive energy can still be shared.

And that I want to with all my heart, continue giving that positive energy to anyone around me the best that I can. With you understanding me as a person.

Thank you, if you have read this far. For taking the time to get to know me.

#.´ · ⋆ ❛ ᵗᵃᵏᵉˢ ᵃ ᶫᵒᶰᵍ ᵈʳᶦᶰᵏ ᵃᶰᵈ ᶜʳʸˢ ⥃ 🇴🇴🇨 ｡#tag: vent #I hope that ultimately people #see what I say -- and understand .#But also #that my feelings can be used as a platform in one way or another.#And that people know you are not alone and that I am also going through so much.

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larksinging · 6 years

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okay here’s my... thoughts on “a simple favor”

getting warnings out of the way uhhh if you’re sensitive to incest or parental abuse those might be worth watching out for. though theyre not related, oddly enough. really the incest thing was kind of weird and didn’t really feel like anyone thought about the full implications

spoilers from here on out, and its a thriller so yknow those matter

um let me start by being nice, it was very fun and while i did guess some twists, a lot of times then THOSE would twist in ways i didnt expect. everyone was very good in it, etc, if you just want a fun thriller than it’s good

okay ive been chewing over the rest mentally in the car because i am... conflicted

so. the gay subtext wasn’t subtext, it was text, but also not really? ill just explain it to make my point clear, they have blake lively’s character be CLEARLY queer (bisexual, or something along those lines) and there’s a kiss, but... how do i put this

the movie kind of feels like theres another version of the script where the husband turns out to be cheating with the TA or something else shitty and then blake lively (emily) and anna kendrick (stephanie) run off together to be morally complicated lovers and raise their children together. but then someone went “no, that’s TOO gay, you can make blake lively gay but not that” and so we got what we got

because the husband ends up being a little bit Too Perfect for the... mood they kind of set early. stephanie of course ends up going back to him in the end and they’re Happy and Straight

and it’s weird because emily fluctuates between this character who is morally complicated and not really a good person but who clearly loves a few people and is from an abusive background, and... this borderline cartoonish villain? they even clearly imply she’s abusive and, dont get me wrong movies exploring women being abusive can be a good thing, but in this case it’s just... it feels a bit too much like... “yeah that mean ol emily with her sexual deviance is so awful and abusive and she’s the reason her husband can’t write, and she lures poor stephanie in with her wiles and almost seducers, but It’s Okay because they all end up straight and happy without her”

when i put it like that it sounds really harsh but. hmnnnn.

anyway there’s a turn where you THINK steph and emily are teaming up to take down the husband, (which feels a little weird because he’s been So Perfect) but then it turns out nope! stephanie and the husband were teaming up to take down emily! all the things she was suspicious/angry at him about were really emily’s fault/not his fault! and haha emily gets her comeuppance in a kind of bizarrely comical ending

i don’t know, maybe this was all intended and it’s me having expected something different and being disappointed talking, but...

anyway this is speculation but i feel like there was a version of this script where emily was primarily just... complicated but within a system that privileges men, and who had much more of a romance arc with stephanie, but somebody said “that’s too gay” and so emily was shoved as the full antagonist and most of the gay was just on her and it became. something

i guess i’m more steamed about this than i thought. make your own judgement, i guess

#ask to tag ...

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milreads · 3 years

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...despite this being a 600 page book, I dont have much to say. A lot of this is straightforward. Tessa and Hardin are toxic as hell. We all know that at this point. My sister read this book a few years ago and she told me how it ended and I told myself I would never read this book because what Hardin does absolutely disgusted me more than any act by a "bad boy" in media. Like there is no getting back from that and I just didnt want any part of it.

But then, I watched both of the movie adaptations that came out from this series... and I'm kind of trash for them? Like I have major heart eyes for the girl that plays Tessa and the movies are like this book, a highly addictive and compelling trainwreck.

Like I am so absolutely torn because on the one hand, this relationship was toxic, they constantly fought, Hardin was so toxic and constantly belittled and talked down to Tessa, not to mention for a majority of this book Tessa is cheating on her boyfriend I wanted to like the relationship while it was building up in the first half of the book but I just could not bring myself to fully enjoy all of the steamy and/or adorable scenes that were happening as they started to get to know each other because of how wrong it was in the movie. I could be wrong but as far as I remember she only cheated on her boyfriend once maybe twice with Hardin before breaking up with him in the film.

As previously stated the ending is also what gets to me. I am possibly getting into spoiler territory and by that I mean I'm going to say the big plot twist at the end of the book but if I ever -I don't care how long I was with the person I don't care how serious it was- if I found out that so much of our relationship was based off a bet for them to take my virginity from me and basically Flex to their friends with bloody sheets that they deflowered me as though I was a prostitute or something for them to barter with as though I wasn't even a person not to mention how his friend got involved and they were both trying to see who could basically get in her pants first, I would be so disgusted, there would just be no coming back from that ever for me.

Clearly since this is a multiple book and multiple movie series I am aware that she moved past that but I think that they are not healthy for each other I think that they both somehow bring out the best and worst out of each other at the same time and I hate that there was such a beautiful almost blossoming flower aspect of seeing Hardin open up and speak about his trauma to Tessa, the whole wedding and everything like that, moving in with her all for it to basically be exposed at he is a raging pile of trash.

I hate that I feel as though there's not a single redeemable character in this book maybe Landon but he was barely featured but like seriously Tessa is a cheater, Noah was a little narc to her mother about everything she did to where he treated her like a child, the mom was awful, like we've already expressed why lot of these characters suck but what hurt me was Steph she was one of my favorite characters of the book and I love her in the movie because she's the same but they also chose to make her queer and I appreciated that I feel like her character could easily be interpreted as queer and it would still make sense but she was supposed to be Tessa's friend and for her to be aware of this bet and be aware of how they were treating her secretly and not do anything to put a stop to it or not tell her about it and basically letting her friend get used as though she was an object without wanting to end that makes her just as bad as the rest of them he'll at least Molly owns up to how bad of a person she is she owns that.

That being said despite the fact that this plot was repetitive and basically did not need to be 600 Pages because it was the same formula of them getting close to each other and then them fighting and it just being a vicious cycle of a toxic relationship all for it to end terribly and all of the characters to be shity people I thoroughly enjoyed myself reading this book it was compulsively readable despite having two jobs and a lot of my time eating up I still managed to fly through this decently quickly at least for me and it was fun it was light-hearted it was compulsively readable I definitely plan to continue with the second book I enjoy the films as I stated before and I'm hoping but since we got a lot of this negative behaviors and patterns done within the first book that after she inevitably forgives his shity actions she takes Harden and they grow as a couple and their struggles and the plot devices in the book and the problems they faced will be less about their relationship and how terrible they are to each other but more so outside antagonists.

I think that they had a quiet kind of charm about them when they were together like moments where they would smile or be sweet to each other and I would like to explore that mor. This book and the film's had a fuckton of Sex and the scenes were very steamy I appreciated them I think that the author can write a good sex scene and so I think that there were a lot of negatives in this book but I also feel like there were a lot of positives to balance it out and when it comes down to it I think if you just want straight up trash that you're going to have fun with I think this is a good book to do so with it is very much take it as it is and you will definitely enjoy your experience with it.

#anna todd #after book #after review #review #tessa young #hardin scott #hessa

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audiovisualrecall · 6 years

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Telling steph the parentals are having executive function issues rn (they do sometimes) and first she says theyre just exhausted and then says that theyre lazy and i just.

If theyre exhausted then it is executive dysfunction.... because executive functioning can be affected by being tired! If you're tired its much harder to do things especially ones that are complicated. Its not laziness. Laziness isnt even a thing for disabled and neurodivergent ppl.... i would LOVE to get out of bed right now! but i just cant make myself do it. When I'm tired, i cant make myself do things well. None of us are the kind of ppl to be good at executive functioning at all times, and it can be a problem! But its not laziness, especially not if the 60 year olds are tired! She's so judgemental and doesnt understand what executive functioning is - decision making, switching tasks, doing tasks, concept of time passing, etc. All of that are part of executive function for everyone, and when theres a dysfunction all it means is u have trouble with one or more of those. So dad having trouble stopping playing a game on his computer or stopping reading or whatever to go shower or go food shopping? Executive dysfunction, not laziness. Ma having trouble getting to making calls and scheduling apptments and such? Executive dysfunction, whether its tiredness or not. Even neurotypical ppl can have dysfunction issues at times, and none of us are that anyway. Laziness is a choice, an active one, it is not 'i cant do that rn I'm too tired rn', and neither is it forgetting to do the thing. Laziness is not 'i want to and need to do the thing and i know that!! But it just. I cant...' and its also not 'i cant do that i dont know how its too difficult aaaaahh I'm not gonna nope nope nope'. Laziness is not being exhausted and forgetting to do something, it is not lazy to care about your health by napping instead of doing things doing things doing things constantly when youre tired. Regardless of what you call it none of those are laziness. Its like capitalism got in her brain and convinced her if someone isnt doing something its laziness, like being exhausted isnt an excuse to stop and take a nap???? Tf? Ma is "lazy" for being axhausted and napping, being forgetful, and otherwise not getting to do things when she has a lot of other stuff on her mind??? Dad being exhausted and doing things he enjoys to relax and not getting to doing something that slipped his mind is him being "lazy"???? How bizzarre.

Steph is leading herself to an eventual breakdown imo, she feels like she has to constantly be doing things and yeah its good to do things in a timely manner when possible, but that doesnt mean burning yourself out. And the judging 60 something year olds for not being how they were 5 or 10 years ago is??? Weird. And just.... its not lazy to be tired, to forget, to mishear, to nap, to screw up, etc! Its not laziness! Its not an active choice! She tends to think if someone forgets something she said or anyone else said then they did it on purpose because they didnt listen well enough. Like wtf? Thats not how brains work. She says it to me even tho i?? Literally have diagnosed adhd??? And forgetfulness is a symptom/trait of adhd! No matter how carefully i listen or even write things down, I'm going to forget things! And most people will even if theyre not adhd! Especially if theyre older too!

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omnishamblegreg · 7 years

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Hey @loveofmylonglife !!

92 truths

rules: once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. At the end choose however many people you want to tag!

LAST …

[1] drink: water

[2] phone call: my auntie

[3] text message: my best friend

[4] song you listened to: It’s Like That by RUN DMC

[5] time you cried: maybe.. 3 weeks ago, if we’re not talking laughter-crying

HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] dated someone twice: no

[7] been cheated on: no

[8] kissed someone and regretted it: yes

[9] lost someone special: no

[10] been depressed: yes

[11] gotten drunk and thrown up: no

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS:

[12] jade green

[13] mint green

[14] lilac

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…

[15] made new friends: yes

[16] fallen out of love: no

[17] laughed until you cried: hooo yes

[18] found out someone was talking about you: yes, good and bad

[19] met someone who changed you: yes

[20] found out who your true friends are: i dont know, maybe i knew that before now

[21] kissed someone on your Facebook list: heh yes

GENERAL…

[22] how many of your tumblr friends do you know in real life: 6 i think

[23] do you have any pets: yes, kitten of the name Mika

[24] do you want to change your name: noo

|25] what did you do for your last birthday: visited my dad in qatar, swam, played board games!

[26] what time did you wake up: like 10.30am

[27] what were you doing at midnight last night: probably watching narcos or being attacked by my cat

[28] name something you cannot wait for: for summer, camping and swimming, passing my driving test and driving cousins about like rebels

[29] when was the last time you saw your mother: like an hour ago

[30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: my family dynamics- hooo boi i agree with you there. and how i’d handled certain situations. where i decided to do 6th form, being brave enough to confess love. having the brain capacity and energy to think thoroughly for myself about my spiritual beliefs. sometimes i think it’d be easier if i’d grown up not questioning stuff so much

[31] what are you listening to right now: the end credits of narcos. my love.

[32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: ah my old basketball coach

[33] something that is getting on your nerves: my inability to revise for shit

[34] elementary: What about it? if you mean the *cough* sherlock piracy, the actor played alongside cumberbum in frankenstein, then went off and did elementary. felt a bit like he nicked his acting pointers to go imitate him. but im not bitter! oh this means primary school: ledge. i was a loving teacher’s pet

[35] high school: same mostly girl’s schools, year 8 was peak :(, but year 9 was PEAK and best fricking thing ever. i moved a lot but made some great friends. then got stressed at alevels but v funny friends. school is stress i dont need to go back to that

[36] college: uni is TBA. i will enjoy my own space

[37] hair colour: brown

[38] long or short hair: short

[39] do you have a crush on someone: not really

[40] what do you like about yourself: that people trust me a lot, that i make my sisters laugh so much they look like gargoyles, that i have little things im good at.

[41] piercings: Ears

[42] nickname: depending with who: karimmer/rimmer, kima, karma, gary

[43] relationship status: single and ready to spread my legs. in bed to sleep because thats the most comfy sleeping position

[44] zodiac sign: im a goat

[45] pronouns: she/her

[46] favourite tv show: this is fluid. right now i am addicted to narcos. (not like that)

[47] tattoos: none

[48] right or left handed: right

FIRST…

[49] surgery: just sewing up my chin?

[50] piercing: ears

[51] best friend: maysa my cousin, since i was 3, who i knows near everything about me (every time we meet i just catch her up on the new shit). we fuckin tight

[52] sport: this is FUNNY. but i guess swimming, in a leisurely, non-competitive floating way

[53] vacation: tunisia, like what else besides visit family every summer obv

[54] pair of trainers: MINE DIDNT LIGHT UP ! they were PINK tho

RIGHT NOW…

[55] eating: nothing

[56] drinking: nothing. sad days

[57] I’m about to: watch pedro pascal in game of thrones

[58] listening to: nada

[59] waiting for: nada

[60] want: this is a lot. want to feel energy coursing through me. want to be physically able to sleep for a day. to kiss. to have photographic memory. to actually have a spec of an imprint, a positive, a help, on the world. to meet up with all my old friends. to understand myself. to write something and make someone think with it.

[61] get married: some day. i forget im 19 and family members are suddenly going ‘hey karima wanna get me to find u someone heh?’

[62] career: during and after uni, i’d like to write stories. and do art. academia would be cool, researching and writing kickass linguistics papers about memes. but i do not want to dwell on this

WHICH IS BETTER…

[63] hugs or kisses: both, but hugs only if they’re proper gourmet ones

[64] lips or eyes: eyes

[65] shorter or taller: taller

[66] older or younger: older

[67] romantic or spontaneous: I AGREE WITH WHAT U SAID BOTH BOTH IS GOOD. spontaneity is madly romantic

[68] nice arms or nice stomach: oooh. stomach i think

[69] sensitive or loud: yep i agree again ^^ someone who’s both is brilliant, we just both gotta be in the same hyper mood then BAM whole house telling us to shut tf up. overall tho.. someone who’s sensitive and understanding is more important. someone who cant switch to being sensitive is so closed off

[70] hook up or relationship: relationship

[71] trouble maker or hesitant: trouble maker if they’re not like. pablo escobar level trouble maker.

HAVE YOU EVER…

[72] kissed a stranger: yeah stupid

[73] drank hard liquor: no

[74] lost glasses/contact lenses: yes

[75] turned someone down: yes poor unfortunate souls

[76] sex on first date: no

[77] broken someone’s heart: i dont Think so

[78] had your own heart broken: yes

[79] been arrested: no

[80] cried when somebody died: yes

[81] fallen for a friend: yes rip me

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…

[82] yourself: at times. i always believe it’ll kinda be alright in the end, that i’ll get to where i want to be, but i dont always believe i have what it takes Right Now. this is hard to explain.

[83] miracles: kind of. depends. i believe it was a miracle i got As and A*s in my gcses when i barely revised. and that my sister causes rain and thunderstorms when she prays for them. some miracles. i feel like a lot more used to happen

[84] love at first sight: no, thats romanticising someone as a concept and i am all too guilty of it

[85] santa claus: no and i dont think i ever did?! i discovered who he was simultaneously with ‘he’s fiction’. but thats okay with me

[86] kiss on the first date: whatever man i know nothing

[87] angels: yes

OTHER…

[88] current best friend’s name: Kathryn, steph, maysa, rabeeya

[89] eye colour: brown

[90] favourite movie: shaun of the dead or How I Live Now

[91] favourite flower: honeysuckle, def jasmine.

[92] favourite season: summer whosoever should like to also do this, tag me and go for it!! im a curious bastard

#ah time flies filling this in #me #ask meme #a little shy of posting this but ehh #also forgive my lack of eloquency its too late for epiphany-level opinions on things #this is a lazy ask meme

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celestialallstars · 5 years

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Episode #4: “Everyone hates a puzzle god.” - Drew

This swap was PERFECTO, well, had I been on Nu Orfeo, it would have been but, Nu Tuatha was my next best choice and already it is great! I have Kori/Bryce and then Loris for sure. I talked with Mitch and Sharky a bit, so I'm optimistic on that. But I go and talk to Stephen. Lo & behold, he tells me there's a rumor that Kori and Bryce are working together. He says he heard it from Jared, but I figure hey, why am I not living a little? I say wow if we lose they go but...I immediately told Zach haha what he wishes to do with it is up to him, but if the rumor happens to spread, then I guess we'll see. If Mitch happened to feel this way, then I can at least use it to avoid being a target for a little while, even if I am sticking with KB.. this is gonna be one heck of an intriguing dynamic!

Oh my goodness, what a great swap! I got Chris, I got Bryce, and I got Mitch all of whom I doubt will be voting me. If I play my cards right I'll also be able to use this opportunity to get closer to Sharky or Loris in the event we never go to tribal. Ideally I wanna make sure me and Loris are especially good since Sharky seems the more likely first boot from our tribe.

I'm not sure what to make of this 24 hour challenge, wanna be optimistic but who knows.

I fucking love Alyssa, literally as soon as we swapped she looked at my teammates, messaged two of them to talk to me and gave me info on Zach and Stephen having history in the season. The equivalent of like "Okay go to the backdoor, meet the guard and tell them you like to fly with the eagles, he'll let you in, tell them you're with me and I'll leave the rest to you." So while yes I am the odd duckling out being the only one from Cyrena I'm going to do my best to work with what I have.

So not very much has changed on Tuatha as far as I can tell. My tribe winning the immunity challenge has helped me delay any confrontation between my 2 alliances which is great, as it should theoretically allow me to maintain relationships with all 6 members of the tribe. Still, it's going to keep being important to win immunity or pray for a swap in order to keep these groups from clashing.

Jared and Rhys are still a ? for me. I don't know why/how Rhys was able to convince Kori to invite Jared to the alliance of 5 instead of Mitch, and it worries me that those 2 may have a stronger bond than I immediately suspected. Hopefully I'll have an opportunity to deal with that when the time comes.

We're going to lose. I hate for it to sound so defeated/pessimistic, but the fact of the matter is unless we have a turn around in the AM, then I only see this setting the pace for the remainder. I know Bryce and Kori must be sleep. Mitch is trying, Loris possibly went back to sleep? And I guess Sharky is shooting for a late night swim or something. Regardless, I'm just already going over who the best person to leave would be for me. Unfortunately, with Kori/Bryce and then Loris, that only leaves me with Mitch or Sharky. Personally...I'd be open to Sharky, just cause, yea it would've been cool for Orfeo Seven to be a thing, but like I only feel secure with Zach/Loris and that's to a certain degree. All in all, this might be the tribal for Sharky to go and if the others are very sad over it, well, I guess they will have to come to terms with it. I know Mitch is with Stephen and now that I know Steph is gonna probs wanna target Kori/Bryce, I'll need him and Mitch around for them to battle it out against each other...hmm decisions.

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So we swapped. Yay. I have Jared. Yay. Stephen, eh kinda doesn’t speak to me a lot, well he speaks to me the least in my tribe. But we’re in an alliance. So I’m gonna have to figure how to navigate that.

Chloe Mo and a Zach all talk to me more than Stephen. So If I can figure out a way to maintain numbers and sack off Stephen, bye bye Stephen.

Also Mo is amazing. Staying up to try to prove worth in challenges 😍 no one deserves mo.

Y'all know me, one wrong social interaction which ends in humiliation or making me look like a dingus will ruin my entire day. Like oh no one laughed at my joke? Time to disappear into nothing and mope for a couple hours.

I’m lowkey scared about this challenge. I’m on my phone which sucks cause I can’t really do much in terms of puzzles. I can do them just always not the first one to finish. So looks like I’m not doing much yikes.

hi! we swapped! um. the last 2 hours. what a mess. so. like. kori posted a screenshot that showed the names of all his alliances and like. i told everyone maybe... ?? i told zach and then.. mitch.. and then.. i confronted bryce bc one was called 'three kings' so it was obv him chris and kori.. and bryce confirmed it. then sharky does the same thing but oh well thats insignificant hes only in 1. also. me and mitch r like. close now!! all because of this mess. but kori hates me. hehee

So the tribe swap has hit, and I'm back with my old pal Zach! You know, the person from my season who I tried to vote out like a million times before finally succeeding due to finding the idol at F5. Woohoo.

In all seriousness, though, I'm kinda happy to be on a tribe with him because he's a challenge beast and I don't think our relationship is totally unworkable. I made it clear to Zach as soon as the swap happened that I wanted to work with him, not against him, so hopefully that'll work out.

Chloe and Mo are 2 people I've also been working to get to know since the game began so I'm not too worried about them targeting me right away. I think this is a strong group overall.

And then there's Jared and Rhys. Probably not the first 2 people I would've chose to swap with but at the very least they both have incentive to keep me around. We are in an alliance together after all!

I made the decision to tell Chris about my situation with Mitch and the alliances on OG Tuatha because I really want them both to survive and unite with them at merge, and if Chris knows that Mitch was on the bottom of the totem pole on Tuatha, then maybe he'll take it into consideration.

So I had a glimmer of hope but we lost it and that's okay. I already prepared myself to vote for Sharky and it seems that is where we're headed...and yet craziness ensued in the time I was away! Kori accidentally reveals three kings and I try and do what I can to talk to others but nobody has said anything so they're either good at hiding things or they legit dropped it after questioning Bryce and Kori. ON TOP of it all, I learn from Loris that Sharkys alliance chat could be from an org..with Drew, Chloe and maybe Matt. It would definitely explain why Chloe didnt except the alliance offer..so that is fun. And now Stephen has told me he/Bryce/Kori/Rhys had majority alliance. So now I have a lot of info. It's just mattering how to use it

Shoutout to Drew for carrying everyone’s ass while drunk for half the challenge

I wanna explain my plan. It might sound ridiculous but... shut up. So I have this chart I made to show who’s doing the best and worst in challenges. I made four charts, three for each tribe, and one for everyone overall. The overall chart comes in handy if I make it to merge. So my dumb strategy is using said charts to kind of vaguely suggest who should be voted out each round. For example Tuatha is going to tribal and Mitch is doing the worst statistically so I can see him being eliminated (Mitch ily I’m sorry if you’re reading this). The bumpy part happens when and if I get to merge. Because then I’m going to be playing with a bunch of incredible comp players. My goal is to kind of use them as a way of getting to the end, by pinning them against one another until eventually it’s just me. Several problems in this plan, the first one is if my tribe goes to tribal which isn’t super severe because like I said I do feel comfy socially but I am doing the worst statistically so there’s a chance I could be eliminated. Second problem this is a very fragile plan and one crack could leave me looking like a goat trying to make something out of nothing and I’m not tryna get biggest goat in touchy subjects again. Will this all fail? Most likely. Am I gonna try to be a cool strategic genius? Yeah. But it’s worth a shot. Ok rereading this whole thing I’m kinda thinking this plan is garbo but I took so much time to write it so I’m gonna send it anyway.

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I’ve been like bouncing in between moods of. “I’m gonna be an early out” and “I’m gonna go far/win.” Right now I’m feeling like an early out again.

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appreciation the thumbnail + title please.

God, the last 24 hours could not have gone worst. We lost the challenge, AND I was such a dumb idiot that I posted a screenshot in the tribe chat where you could see my alliances.

So naturally I had to basically inform anyone I was aligned with that it happened. I feel like such a flop right now. I've missed the window 3 times for searching for an idol, and it's just like how can I be so absent minded. I need to get myself together if I want to even make the merge let alone win the game.

So far the only people I know for sure saw the Screenshot are Loris and Zach. Chances are other people know and just haven't told me. I'm just trying to keep a level head after having a mental breakdown over what an idiot I've been. We're at tribal and I'm hoping the votes on Sharky are there because we do talk the least. (I'd rather Loris goes but we're actually in a chat together because apparently Jared and him talk a ton.) I have 0 desire to keep working with Loris though, so if I can push it I wanna send Loris home next if we lose again, he literally went up to Bryce asking if he was in Three Kings and tried to draw attention to my screenshot without flat out saying it in tribe chat, asking Mitch if he saw it etc etc.

It's obvious he's trying to basically draw attention to me because I did win our season. His fake-nice apologeticism isn't fazing me. If it's genuine, well he's bad at seeming sincere then since the actions I've seen don't reflect it.

Boy I hope I wake up and get my shit together because I really need to. Granted I could also be seeing myself going right now, so who knows. I haven't been the most useful in the challenges even though I've never not been trying. So hopefully I stick around for awhile longer. I've still got so much more I've set out to do and I don't want to get sent home without accomplishing any of it.

So we SWAPPED and I wanna give a little bit of insight as to my thoughts. New tuatha consists of me loris chris sharky kori and bryce. The first challenge was this 24 hour puzzle crap where Zach and Drew H from the other respective tribes CARRIED their teams to victory. It is about 5 hours before tribal and I already feel like I am on the bottom again. IDK WHAT IM DOING WRONG. I always seem to be on the bottom premerge, but thankfully this is how I flourish. I am SO good at getting out of situations like these and finding myself in a power position at merge because nobody wants to get rid of me. RN I created a chat with Loris and myself just so he can keep me updated on what is HAPPENING with chris and sharky, and i also have my old alliance with Jared and Stephen who i hope are doing ok. The targets for this round are me and sharky for being perceived as inactive. The vote should be 5-1 with Sharky going, but it HAS crossed my mind to throw a vote on like Bryce to shake the cage a little bit. I dont trust Bryce one bit and I feel like he'd throw me to the curb the first chance he gets unless loris keeps him in check.

Everyone hates a puzzle god mwah!!

Lol so we swapped, I get Michael and Alyssa but the former blue tribe has 4/6 majority here, I like them enough as people but like...we're just gonna go ahead and not go to tribal here, if I have to drag them to the immunity statue kicking and fucking screaming. Which is what I did. F17 ladies

Fourth tribal safe. It’s a weird feeling to be safe so many times in a row but I’m glad my all stars game is getting off to a strong start by making connections here there and everywhere. I’m praying for Sharky tonight because I know that he’s close to me and Chloe so if he goes it’s definitely worse case scenario.

So it seems sides are forming so that's cool. Mitch is possibly going to end up with me [and Loris] and then there would be Bryce and Kori. However, after chatting with Stephen and Jared yesterday, I've concluded that I am in a pickle! Let's say Kori/Bryce are legit about this Three Kings thing. Well, I know I'm a possible third wheel for it. On top of that, I'm assuming Mitch might get boned if we lose again, however, Stephen trusts Mitch a lot and so wants us to use him to take shots at Bryce/Kori if we lose again. Mind you, according to Jared, Stephen is a sneaky dude (Sneaky Pete), and him and Rhys don't trust him longterm. SO what does this all mean? All of my allies are hot messes. And on top of it all, I am beginning to feel for Sharky. Yes! I get that its been optimal for me to get him out, but it still sort of sucks now that I've talked with him more. Unfortunately, it is for the best he goes for my game right this instant and hopefully the wrath of him and his allies shant be too horrible.

So we swapped!!! And by some fucking miracle, we have a majority of me, jack, Alyssa and Bodhi. Was very unexpected tbh but we'll take it! Michael and Drew joined us which is good cause they r both v.good at challenges which I would hope means we can immunity run. Cause no thank u hate tribal not dealing with that. Drew also like carried us in the challenge which was a yeet, I swear I tried tho hehe. Mo and rhys I want to try and get to work together, would be very fun n flirty. Sharky messaged me like "lol I'm leaving" and if he does, I'm fucking fighting people, cause that is NOT ON. HE is my one true love and if he leaves I will be annoyed so much and will be quite fucked tbh.love that for me!!

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at orientation last year we were told about a “rule of 7” to not overcommit ourselves. I’ve just about doubled that threshold and depending how the next few days go it might go even higher. Pray for me.

I wish I had more energy to dedicate to this game but i need to fucking relax in my free time. So I’ll talk to people at my current rate and hopefully that’ll get me to merge. Then I’ll drop all other responsibilities and fucking dominate.

I really think the game is starting to slow down for me. Now what I mean by that is I am continuing to get more woke and more misty, and the aura of this being all stars and the spectacle of the other players being so great is starting to dissapear.

I feel very much as though I have perfected my craft in terms of how I like to play, and I'm doing it very well here. It's cool to think about on a meta level like from AnnaJane's perspective: "oh my god Jared did really well for himself in Wakea and had major influence to where some people couldn't even notice, I wonder how he'll stack up against these all stars." I can feel myself back in that zone and coming into my own even in this field. To the point where these legends like Chris and Bryce and Sharky, I know deep down that I can play ball with them. Now, they may beat me at the end of the day and I may go home at some point, but I can understand even at this moment that I am probably top 3 if not the #1 best player here. Or at least I CAN be.

I want to zoom in on this and really get my shit together and take advantage of what is in front of me because with the game dynamics as they are, I can very clearly see myself as the winner. I need to keep doing what I'm doing, but at the same time make myself dissapear and be able to do this undetected.

My new strategy is called "fast and loose" because I'm going to get into these conversations, knock it out of the park and get out. Leave people feeling good about me every time I leave the room. I don't need to spend a ton of time working on anyone to the point they can tell what I'm doing. Calls? After tonight they are done. Not calling with anybody unless they ask. I want to be gaining social capital and influencing people's decisions without being detected so it has to be a hit and run.

I will reevaluate my position soon and probably recalculate my alliances, maybe I was wrong about Stephen and I need to get closer with him while no one else is. But at this moment I need targets going into the merge. That's how I'm gonna set it up. I want everyone to be shooting at each other and then at the key moment boom challenge advantage, boom idol, boom you gotta vote out Bryce can't vote for me, oh look I'm at the end.

Having the One World twist is so interesting because in a usual game when you don’t know everyone until you get to merge usually. You don’t know what’s going on, on the enemy tribe, you don’t know who’s inactive, who is starting drama or who is messy in challenges. Because you’re focusing all your social energy into your tribe alone so when someone you haven’t made contact with on the enemy tribe gets eliminated you think nothing of it. But here there are no walls, you can see and communicate with everyone and it’s in your best interest to focus your social energy into the one world chat because that’s what everyone else is doing. So my point in saying this is it’s now incredibly difficult to imagine having to lose 8 people before we get to the final 10. Because literally everyone is social, there are like two quiet people but everyone else you talk to on the daily and everyone is kicking ass in these challenges (except like two people). I think that’s why I keep thinking myself as an early out is because it’s so hard to imagine anyone else getting voted out. But fuck that I got shit to prove.

I can’t even begin to explain how it feels to have been immune for 10 days in a row. My glow up front wakea is real.

Bodhi wants to get the 4 of us OG Cyrena's in a majority alliance, which is super convenient bc we can just combine our alliances into one. Problem is? I would HATE to vote either Drew or Michael out, especially given Drew singlehandedly got us immunity this time. So if there was ever time for an immunity streak...

Also I keep forgetting to search for idols this is why I never find one

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Sharky is voted out 5-1.

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