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#alfred pennyworth
comatose--overdose19 hours ago
Every time Dick leaves the house Bruce gets a new kid
Dick : [leaves]
Bruce: oh god. Nest empty. Must have bird. Hrnnnnngh [adopts an orphan]
Dick: [returns] ........
Dick: Who the fuck is this?
Jason: Hi.
Dick: I was only gone 3 weeks!
Jason: [Is dead]
Dick: [leaves]
Bruce: :馃ズ b-but!!! I have no baby!!! Must have baby!! Alfred, call the guy!
Dick : [returns]
Dick: .... Bruce why is the neighbor kid here? And where'd the girl come from?
Tim: Hi. I live here now.
Stephanie: I don't live here but I might as well.
Dick: .... Bruce what the fuck. I was only gone for the weekend and Jason's grave is still fresh.
Dick: [Leaves]
Bruce: [Vibrates intensely] Alfred--
Alfred: Already called, Sir.
Dick: [Returns]
Dick:....... (O . O)
Dick: H-hello.... Children.... Where... How.... ?
Cass, Duke, Terry, Carrie, Billy, Harper and Cullen: Hi.
Damian: I am the blood son.
Tim & Steph: We never left.
Dick: ....
Dick: [throws an apple at B's head] I ONLY WENT TO THE STORE BRUCE!!! IT WAS ONLY TWO HOURS BRUCE!!!! [Continues chucking produce]
Jason: [From behind Dick] I'm back, btw.
Dick: [Jumps out of his skin] AA--!!
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sailorsophiee2 days ago
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dilf wayne made an appearance yall it鈥檚 okay AND LOOK AT THE FAMILY EVEN JASONS THERE :D
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iselsis2 days ago
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why-i-love-comics17 hours ago
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Dark Knights of Steel #2 - "Distant Thunder" (2021)
written by Tom Taylor art by Yasmine Putri & Arif Prianto
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allineedisonedreama day ago
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and Alfred never let them into the kitchen again...
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james-bucky-beara day ago
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I felt bad for Bruce, he just wanted to see his daughter's performance but the gotham criminals don't give the guy a break.
But not even for the boys to pull the iphone and record....
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gotham-exclusive2 days ago
Bruce: Christmas is cancelled
Clark: You can鈥檛 cancel a holiday
Bruce: Keep it up Kent and you鈥檒l lose New Years too
Clark: What does that even mean?
Bruce: That鈥檚 it, Alfred take New Years away from Clark
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awaelchibichaos17 hours ago
We know Bruce Wayne makes lots of charity events, but did you know that he is never allowed to go alone to events in orphanages?
A member of the batfamily, be it Alfred or anyone else, always follows him to those, because he has no self control when it comes to adopting more kids.
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666mistyday2 days ago
Batfam Headcanons pt. ?
Tim is really good at ice skating (ice skating lessons when he was growing up)
Duke's favorite ice cream is mint chocolate chip
Jason would totally not *wink* give any of his siblings advice on getting back at someone in a petty way, he'd be like "do NOT put sugar in their gasoline tank, that would absolutely ruin their car" or like "never ever send them a glitter bomb, that shit would never be entirely cleaned up"
Dick did a photo shoot for Abercrombie and Fitch back when he moved out of the manor and then bribed Babs to delete it from the internet later on (only she has copies of the photos)
Tim, Duke, and Cass are k pop stans
Dick owns one of those indoor trampoline parks in bludhaven
Bruce had the "green lantern" name trademarked because he was feeling petty one particular morning after a JL meeting (it only lasted a year because he didn't feel like renewing it so he gave it back)
Steph is the designated one (after beating the shit out of Black Spider that one time) that kills the spiders around the house (she charges favors and they depend on how big is the spider)
Dick is that Michael from the office meme rolling up to poker face blasting in his car pulling up and say "it's Britney bitch" every time Steph asks him to pick her up (at this point if someone tries to clone Dick that's how she can tell if he's the real one)
Steph and Cass were watching the parent trap for the millionth time and decided to pierce each other's ears like in the movie, zero thoughts just vibes
Damian loves The Grinch movie, he thinks the animated one is trash
Cass has a collection of chapsticks and has them meticulously counted so if she sees one is missing she isn't afraid to throw hands
Sometimes when patrol is too slow Damian will whip out his little sketchbook and doodle or full-on draw the skyline of Gotham or whoever he's patrolling with
One time after not seeing them after a long time Jason decided to prank Bruce by putting a lot of fake tattoos on his arms, neck, and torso and wore a muscle tee to roll around the manor
Alfred greets everyone each morning as they come down to have breakfast
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theartofthecover23 hours ago
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Batman: Alfred Pennyworth [with Batman & Robin] portrait warmup (2021)
Art by: Chris Samnee
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couldbeyouraphrodite10 hours ago
Brother Moments in Nightwing Annual 2021
pt. 2
(spoiler alert, duh.)
8. Feel free to hit me hard.
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First of all, I love the tribute/shout out to Nightwing's current main team from Tom Taylor. The current Nightwing is written by Tom Taylor with art by Bruno Redondo and colors by Adriano Lucas.
Taylor is also the writer for this year's Nightwing Annual and it seems he slipped in a tribute to the rest of his main team in Oracle's dialogue when she made a report to Nightwing.
That aside, let's talk about the scene itself. I think it's pretty funny how they're both adults now but Dick still won't let Jason drive (for now, at least).
And I feel like this scene symbolises Jason's inner turmoil which tends to punish himself over the things he's done in the past. But I might be reading too much into this lmao.
Ramming into Clayface with the Batmobile is a pretty cool entrance made by the two oldest Batbros though.
9. Clayface grabs Dick.
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Jason really came to Dick's defense here.
Jason: put my damn brother down, bitch
And Clayface really underestimated Jason's daddy issues, huh.
It's a pretty funny scene though. I don't know why Clayface thought it'd be a good idea to morph into Batman of people.
There isn't much to talk about in this scene but I included it because I think it's amusing.
10. Jason gets to drive.
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See, Jason, this is exactly why Dick never lets you drive.
And the one time he did let Jason drive, he wrecks the Batmobile.
I guess Dick handing the keys over to Jason symbolises letting him take over the mission, too. Since Jason is personally involved with this case now (his mother overdosed from drugs supplied by Wolfgang Blysma, aka the villain who hired Clayface).
who knew he'd end up wrecking their dad's car tho lmao
11. Epic entrance.
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Not much to talk about here, just a super epic entrance by the Batbros.
Also, I consider it canon that Jason grew to be taller than Dick (most fanart also depict Jason as taller than Dick). So I'm a little disappointed that it wasn't integrated into this issue (it's a personal preference, though).
12. Conclusion of the story.
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I like their friendly banter here, it's rather cute.
I'm glad Jason is satisfied with seeing criminals getting justice. After all, there was a time when violence seemed to be the only way out for him. He's learning to control his violence better, and we're all so proud of you.
It's funny how they both agree not to tell Dad that they took his car out for a joyride (and wrecked it).
This issue seems to tie a lot of the current events to past events, back when Jason was Robin. It fits so well and the story is thoroughly wholesome.
What a great story, definitely one of my favourite Dick and Jason team-ups.
Bonus: Good Brother!Dick dialogue.
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I personally love the fact that Dick told Jason that he's proud of him, even mentioning that Bruce probably is, too.
They're a pretty troubled family, but they sure do love each other, don't they?
that concludes all i've got for everyone today, see u in the post! don't forget to read the current Nightwing run, it's reallt good!
<- part 1
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captaindickgraysona day ago
Bruce Wayne x Reader
鈥淛erome Valeska is back. -Part 1 of ?
Imagine Jerome (from the TV show Gotham came to pay a visit to the reader and Bruce Wayne. Pretty much no like an AU, Jerome Valeska never died, and he isn鈥檛 the Joker. Bruce and reader have their own daughter.)
I pulled up to the manor and I quickened my pace with every step. I tried to listen to odd sounds, but I could only hear the sounds of my Louboutin heels on the cement. Alfred opened the door for me,聽鈥淢rs. Wayne, what is the matter? I don鈥檛 think I have seen you pull into the driveway like that before.鈥 He said and I sat my purse down on the small table by the front door.
鈥淎lfred, is Bruce home? Are the boys and Allison here?鈥 I questioned and Alfred locked the door.聽鈥淢aster Bruce is stuck at Wayne Enterprises, and the boys from what I understand are gone to the movies. Miss Allison is in her room playing. What is the matter, Y/N?鈥 He questioned with a look of panic across his face.
I sighed as I slipped off my jacket,聽鈥淲ould you mind going and picking up the boys early, Alfred? I would feel better if they were home. I promise I will explain everything to you later.鈥 I say and he quickly but quietly went on his way without questioning me.聽
I jogged up the stairs,聽鈥淎llison? Allison, honey, please come here.鈥 I call and there was no answer. I panicked and raced into her room, and I saw her on the floor with headphones on. I touched her shoulder and she let out a yell,聽鈥淥h, mommy! You scared me!鈥 She looked so much like Bruce when he was younger, it was like they were twins, only she had long hair.
鈥淚鈥檓 sorry sweet pea, but I called you and you didn鈥檛 answer.鈥 I say and she smiled up at me,聽鈥淚 was pretending my barbies were having a concert!鈥 She explained about how the pink one was the one singing and the others were doing backup vocals. The lights began to flicker, and I pulled her close to me.聽
I picked her up and I raced into Tim鈥檚 bedroom, I opened up the small door that led into a bigger room. At this point, I was glad we had a bedroom with a secret room in it.聽鈥淎llison, listen to me carefully, I need you to stay in here and not to come out until I come and get you.鈥 I say as the lights went out.聽鈥淚f you here screaming, or anything that is unusual, do not come out. Do you understand?鈥 I say and she nodded.
鈥淚鈥檓 scared, mommy.鈥 She said as I sat her down and let her crawl into the small space,聽鈥淭here isn鈥檛 time to be scared, darling. Just do as mommy says and you will be okay.鈥 I say and I placed a kiss on her head.
I sent a text to Bruce:聽鈥淏ruce, get home NOW. Allison is in Tim鈥檚 room.鈥
I handed Allison the phone and I closed the door and pushed the laundry hamper in front of the door. The sound of glass shattering echoed up the stairs and I got up and slowly made my way to mine and Bruce鈥檚 room. I quietly opened Bruce鈥檚 sock drawer and pulled out the small handgun he had hidden. My hands started to shake while I was trying to load the bullets,聽鈥淒amnit...鈥 I whispered and I could hear whistling . It was eerie and the sound progressively got louder. I quickly walked to the staircase, I had to get whoever this was away from Allison. I slowly made my way down the stairs and I had the gun drawn.
鈥淕od.... you are beautiful as ever, princess.鈥 I heard the voice echo and I shuddered at the sound.聽鈥淟ook at you.... trying to protect yourself. I could smell you. Your Chanel Number Five gave you away.鈥 The voice sounded like it came from behind me and I turned around quickly with the gun drawn.
The man let out a manic laugh and I instantly froze,聽鈥淚 bet that gave my anonymity away! Look at you, baby, you haven鈥檛 changed a bit.鈥 I knew that laugh, it has haunted me to this day. That laugh was forever burned in my mind, it was Jerome Valeska.
I began pointing the gun at every corner I heard a laugh,聽鈥淚 thought you were dead!鈥 I shouted and he laughed again. There was a long pause,聽鈥淲ell I can assure you, I was never dead. I was waiting for the perfect time to visit you, princess.鈥 He said and I could hear his footsteps.
鈥淚 can鈥檛 believe you married Bruce Wayne, Billionaire Brat. And you two have been busy! You both had billionaire brats together.鈥 He seethed and I could hear glass shatter, he was in the living room. I slowly walked into the living room and scanned the room. I looked down at the floor and all of our family pictures were lying on the floor.
鈥淲hat the hell do you want, Jerome? It has been years since you鈥檝e tortured us last. What could you want now? What made you want to come out of hiding?鈥 I questioned and he chuckled.聽
鈥淵ou don鈥檛 understand, I want you! I鈥檓 not letting that Billionaire Brat have you forever. I am going to take you away for him, and them I will hurt all of your brat offspring!鈥 He said and I saw his dark figure emerge out of the darkness. He bent down and picked up a picture off of the ground.聽鈥淲ell, I will ship the little girl off to Timbuktu. I know that one belongs to you and him. The others, they鈥檙e orphans. Why would I hurt them?鈥 He asked and he slowly approached me.
I fired the gun twice, and someone hit me from behind.聽鈥淵ou know what the best thing about having cronies is? You can set them up, and you my dear, are easily tricked.鈥 He said as my eyes began to close.
鈥淏ruce...鈥 I called out before I lost consciousness.
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That鈥檚 it for this one guys! I hope you all enjoyed it!
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theodorecanaryhood2 days ago
On the tenth day of Christmas
Batboys, Alfred x GN reader (gonna use GK universe for this)
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December was a different experience for each of the boys for many reasons.
Dick always had a good Christmas and New Year, Jason鈥檚 was pretty bad as he had abusive parents and then lived in the streets, then was dead. Now fine though, living in a mansion and all. Tim鈥檚 was average, then he got officially adopted into the Wayne manic life.
Alfred always tried to make an extra effort for the Boys, now fully grown men, as they are all he has. More so now as Bruce was no longer here.
Barbara was off in Florida for the Holiday with her friends and Aunt. So Alfred was short of one person, but then he remembered you had no where to go as you were stuck in Gotham City.
鈥楶lease do come for as long as you like, this is your home as long as you need y/n鈥 Alfred spoke on the phone, the three men not being able to hear who he was talking to.
鈥榃ho you think Alf is talking to?鈥 Jason asked curiously, Dick shrugging as he sipped his Coffee.
鈥楴o idea鈥 Tim responded, Alfred then walked back into the dining room as he took a seat next to Dick.
鈥榃hat?鈥 Alfred asked nonchalantly, Jason just smirked.
鈥榃ho you talking to on the phone there Alf?鈥 He asked the Butler, Alfred just winked as he picked up his newspaper.
The three men exchanged looks, not knowing what Alfred was upto. Who is staying? And this close the Holiday.
You drive upto Wayne Manor on the horrendous Snow fall, the white December was beautiful you couldn鈥檛 deny. But a huge inconvenience for you right now as you were trying not to die on the bendy road.
鈥楿ncle Alf?鈥 You called as you locked your car, rushing over to him in the snow.
鈥榊/n, lovely to see you after so long鈥 Alfred greeted you with his warm smile. The warmest smile you knew, it always melted your heart when your favourite Uncle would greet you.
鈥楶lease come in, warm up by the fire鈥 he spoke as he took your coat, you entering the Manor.
鈥榊ikes, this is huge鈥 you looked around as you took in the sight of Wayne Manor.
鈥楾hat鈥檚 what she鈥檚 said鈥 Jason shouted from the living room in response to your comment.
鈥楳aster Todd鈥 Alfred scalded as he walked into the room with you next to him, Jason jumped to his feet as he saw you.
鈥楽orry鈥 Jason looked at you wide eyed as he cringed slightly, you just laughed as you put your hand out to him.
鈥業鈥檓 y/n, y/n Pennyworth鈥 Jason shook your hand, looking at Alfred then back at you.
鈥楢lfred鈥檚 Niece/Nephew鈥 Jason smiled, you nodded as you put your bag down.
鈥楾hat鈥檚 a big bag鈥 Alfred looked at it as it test at your feet.
鈥榊eah, brought all my presents only the air port thought it was a bag of bloody explosives, twat at customs wouldn鈥檛 listen鈥 you recalled, nearly getting lost for time as you argued with the man.
Alfred chuckled, he always loved your antics and that you never lost your sense of humour. You never lost it even in a crisis, and secretly Alfred needed you to try and cheer everyone up.
鈥榃e鈥檒l come through to the kitchen, I鈥檓 sure Masters Dick and Tim would like to meet you鈥 Alfred put a hand on your back. Jason looking at you a little too long for Alfred鈥檚 liking.
鈥業 remember back when we used to hide under the patio at Nana鈥檚 house鈥 you laughed as Alfred set the cups of tea on the table.
鈥榊es, you and your siblings were a riot growing up鈥 Alfred chuckled to himself. Jason looking at you, never losing eye contact with you.
You looked at him every now and then, smiling as Dick nudged you. Tim even clicked on and kept winking at you as he would subtly point at Jason.
鈥業t was mostly my brother, he liked to wind everyone up, cantankerous shit鈥 you smiled, noticing Jason and blushing a little.
Alfred sat beside you as he sipped his tea, watching as your face would light up telling everyone mental stories from your childhood. The pranks you and your Brothers would pull on each other, the antics and most importantly the love you shared for each other, even to now.
December 25th shot at you all fast as you sat in the living room, Alfred already telling you what to get for the three siblings. Knowing bits and pieces about them. Of course, already knowing their alter egos. You would take that information to the grave.
Dick and Tim chuckled as the they opened their presents, getting great gifts from everyone.
Though there was no Bruce, it still felt like they could be happy. Alfred tried his best to make everyone not miss out on the cheer of the day. Even if a family member was missing.
Wrapping paper and gift bags discarded to the side of the room, unwrapped gifts being carried up the stairs.
Jason stood in the doorway to the living room as you walked in, standing in front of him. You both smiled slightly, looking up to see.
鈥楳istletoe?鈥 You both whispered simultaneously, Jason went red as you winked at him.
鈥楥ome here鈥 you said as you leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. Just slight pressure for a few seconds.
Pulling away and sighing slightly as Jason inhaled, going even more red in the face.
鈥楳erry Christmas鈥 you said as you walked into the room, Jason just smiled shyly as he followed you.
He grabbed your arm, spun you round to face him again and kissed you harder, one hand on your waist and the other on the back of your head holding you in place. You grabbed onto one of arms and the other hand the side of his face. Leaning your head into the kiss more.
鈥楳erry Christmas y/n鈥 Jason smiled as he pulled away from you.
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bambicambia day ago
Marinette: i can't wait until you finally talk to someone.
Dick: *begrudgingly* he does lots of talking. *glares at Bruce* he just doesn't say anything.
Bruce: *pointedly igores them both and continues eating whatever Alfred made them for breakfast*
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dculatera day ago
Dick: why鈥檚 Alfred doing the laundry so loudly?
Bruce: so everyone knows no one helps him around the house
Alfred in the distance: *politely slams the dryer shut*
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why-i-love-comicsan hour ago
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Batman '89 #4 - "Shadows" (2021)
written by Sam Hamm art by Joe Quinones & Leonardo Ito
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bpersephone2 days ago
Old people crying is so emotional to me. Just thinking about Alfred crying over Jason鈥檚 death is enough to make me tear up every time.
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