Tim: I still have your underwear

Stephanie: I still have your virginity

Bruce: You didn't know I play the violin?

Clark: Before today, I didn't even know you ate food.

Jason: Mistakes were made-

Tim: By you!

Jason: -and people got hurt

Tim: By you!

Bruce: We’re going on a road trip to Tennessee!

Dick, miserably: Yaaay

Cass: *disappears*

Jason: *bolts for the door*

Duke: You’re a billionaire, can’t we fly?

Tim: I call the trunk.

Steph: I don’t live with you, I’m going home.

Damian: *inhuman screeching*

Bruce: Is this where I am supposed to feel sorry for you?

Clark: I mean I don't want you to. But, just so you know, a well adjusted person would.

Batfam: We don’t kill!

Red hood:

Clark: Go ahead and introduce yourself.

Jon: My name is Jon with a "B" and I’ve been afraid of insects my entire—

Damian: Stop, stop, stop. Where?

Jon: Hm?

Damian: Where’s the "B"?

Jon, panicking: There’s a bee?!?

Tim: I can’t get my clam open.

Dick: Here. You just have to-

Dick: Wait a minute. This is a rock!

Dick: Aw! They’re all rocks!

Tim: Relatives. Can’t live with them, can’t turn them in for the reward.

Bruce: if you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world stays the same.

Jason, with his mouth full: kill two.

Jason, gently shaking Bruce: Bruce, wake up.

Bruce, looks at his phone: Why are you waking me up at 3 in the morning?

Jason: ...

Bruce: Everything is on fire, isn't it?

Jason: ...yes

Bruce: Whenever I’m confronted with a problem, and I feel helpless, I look at a picture of my family.

Dick: That’s so nice—

Bruce: And I think If I can deal with these fools, then I can do anything.

Dick: Less nice.

Tim: I made tea.

Damian: I would hardly call what you drink tea. No thank you.

Tim: I didn't make it for you.

Damian: Then why are you telling me?

Tim: It's a conversation starter.

Damian: That’s a lousy conversation starter.

Tim: Oh, is it? We're conversing. Checkmate.

Damian: *shatters the teacup with a throwing knife*

Barbara: You just need a little self control

Dick: Someone gave me a bag of cookies and I ate all of it without breathing.

Barbara: Well, you're not a child anymore you have more discipline.

Dick: The cookies were yesterday!

^Wayne Manor^

Cass, bursting in: CODE YELLOW!!

Bruce: Code yellow? What’s going on?!

Tim, running: Oh crap Cass, I’m coming!!

Bruce, following Tim: What is going on?

Duke: *incoherent sobbing*

Tim, putting blanket around Duke: Code Yellow Bruce

Cass, changing channel on TV: Duke got to the high ground scene in Revenge of the Sith

Duke, sobbing: They we’re brothers!! They loved each other and it’s j-just so sad!! *sobs*

Bruce:……..

Oliver: I should really frisk her for weapons before I go.

Talia: Try and I'll break your little fingers.

Oliver: She's clean.

this is my formal request for dc to make an animated batfam series

Jason: Okay, that was too much fun.

Damian: I know. I would go ice skating every night.

Dick: Except now we can’t because we’ve been banned from the ice rink.

Damian: Not my fault, the big dude kept bumping into me.

Dick: So you had to jack-slap him in front of his kids?

*Damian and Jason Laughing*

"Practice homosexuality, I must,"

-Tim Drake in a Yoda voice, probably

Cassandra: *holding a pot of stew*

Duke: *bumps into her*

Cassandra: What the hell, Duke?!? You almost killed me! I'm not going out in a stew-making accident! Cass is gonna die saving the president, or Cass is never gonna die!