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jess-rewatches-prodigalson · 3 years

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Take Your Father to Work Day (S2, E4)

As many people have said: This is one of the STRONGEST Prodigal Son episodes to date. It was incredible. My time-stamped thoughts for this episode are below.

I reference Malcolm’s mental health and sexual violence in this one. So if that’s going to be a trigger for you, don’t keep reading.

SPOILERS AHEAD:

0:16 - OMG. Destiny’s Child. Whoever is in charge of the soundtrack for this show needs a raise. Or an award. It’s SOO GOOD.

0:18 - How great is this montage of Martin’s prison life too? I mean the insane mundanity of it combined with “Survivor” and Michael Sheen’s incredible acting is some perfect mix between hilarious, captivating, and just brilliant.

1:06 - I feel so bad for Mr.David. He has to deal with Martin’s theatrics every day. Poor guy looks done in this episode.

1:35 - CAN HECTOR BECOME A BIGGER CHARACTER?! PLEASE. He’s hilarious and I love him. “Bro. You got your ass jumped at Sunday School.”

2:09 - Wait. What? Jerry’s getting released?!? I mean, I understand that he’s no longer in need of psychiatric care......but he still killed someone. Shouldn’t he just be getting transferred to a different prison?

2:25 - Does Jerry have a death wish?!?! He’s talking about being released in a room full of jealous murderers. Everyone looks sooooo pissed at Jerry.

2:54 - Martin is such a liar. However - Michael Sheen’s performance is astoundingly good. Like he shines brighter than usual in this episode.

3:17 - Poor Malcolm. “What’s going on?” Poor boy looks terrified.

3:23 - I love everything about this scene. I love how freaked out Malcolm is. I love you extra Jessica is. BUT HANS. Holy shit. I want Hans in every episode. He’s crazy in a good way and such a beautiful comedic relief.

3:30 - OMG. “Skinny milennial” might be the best thing anyone has ever called Malcolm. Someone please tell JT and Dani - hell, even Gil. They would tease him forever and I want to see it.

3:45 - 1) Malcolm is a terrible liar. 2) Jessica knows he’s lying. 3) This story about the wine is interesting. I wonder when and how Malcolm first told Jessica the story. Was it the same night? AND HOW DID ENDICOTT’S BODY END UP IN ESTONIA?!? I WANT MORE INFORMATION ABOUT THAT NIGHT.

3:54 - “Ainsley and I came back from the hospital after Gil’s stabbing.”....we never saw Ainsley at the hospital. Was she there and left before Malcolm got there? Or is this a plot hole I need to ignore?

4:05 - The way that the flashbacks of Endicott’s murder is spliced into this scene with Malcolm’s cover story is so perfectly executed. It’s so captivating and so so well done.

4:14 - Malcolm’s eyes look quite manic during the retelling of this story. Poor guy is desperate to have everyone believe the story. Poor guy probably wants to convince himself that the story is true.

4:16 - Wait. What? Ainsley has always been clumsy? .....interesting. I’ve seen no evidence of it but I’ll believe it for the sake of the plot.

4:23 - “At least one of you has a soul.” Holy shit. hahaha Hans is brutal. I love him so much. I also love how this line makes me, as a viewer, think “does that mean the writers want me to think that Ainsley doesn’t have a soul?” ...or more likely that she doesn’t feel emotion (which can be interpreted as a lack of a soul). That she’s a psychopath like Martin?

4:27 - OMG. Jessica loves Hans. He speaks to her dramatic rich woman soul. So entertaining.

4:30 - Poor. Malcolm. This boy is always in some sort of emotional turmoil. For once I wish he was happy (but also I love the emotional whump so if that could continue that would be great).

4:44 - “It’s so much more than that.” *chef’s kiss* comedic genius. I would watch a whole episode of Mr.David making fun of Martin. But can we all just take a minute to appreciate that Martin doesn’t seem bothered at all that Mr.David is basically verbally telling him that he sucks? It’s almost like Martin thinks they’re friends?

4:50 - Martin is strangely chill talking to Mr.David in this scene. It’s a little off-putting. He almost seems normal. He’s not putting on his usual theatrics or ranting about doctor stuff. It makes you wonder how many different sides of Martin that Mr.David has witnessed.

5:01 - “Oh no. Not Jerry.” LMAO. HOLY SHIT. Michael Sheen needs an Emmy. His delivery of that line might be the funniest thing this show has ever given us. hahahahaha

5:29 - Damn. This is not Gil’s month. First Jessica dumps him. Then he has to deal with Martin Whitly in the flesh. That plus the on-going drama of worrying about Malcolm’s mental health and the stress of reintegrating into work after a STAB WOUND.

5:31 - Gil’s face. hahahahaha he’s like, “Kill me. This can’t be happening. I hate everything. I wish the ground would open up and swallow me whole.”

5:37 - “Yeah. Why’d you do it?” GIL. OMG. I’m so proud of Gil for dissing Martin to his face. BUT ALSO I worry that that’s going to give Martin more of a reason to hate Gil. I’m genuinely scared that the writers have Martin escaping as the pre-finale episode and Martin trying to kill Gil as the finale. Maybe Gil shows up trying to save Malcolm, AInsley, and Jessica (whom Martin is trying to abduct or hurt or something) idk I just feel like it’s going to be a likely subplot somewhere. I don’t want an attempt on Gil’s life to become a season finale tradition.

5:56 - Ew. “Gilly” That is a terrible nickname. I think I threw up a little.

6:00 - Damn. I love this scene. I could watch Martin and Gil pretending to be civil to each other for years. So entertaining.

6:29 - hahahahaha OMG. Gil’s reaction to Martin saying, “Thank you” PLUS Edrisa’s sudden excitement at realizing she’s 10 ft away from Malcolm’s Dad - a medical legend, is magical.

6:35 - Not gonna lie. When Edrisa said, “Ok. I’m gonna play it cool.” I had to pause my TV and walk away to calm down. I was experiencing a mixture of second hand embarrassment for Edrisa’s inevitable behaviour, excitement for what is to come, and fear that Martin would be a jerk to our precious Edrisa.

6:44 - Edrisa and Martin interacting was everything I’d hoped. It was strange, funny, sweet, and disturbing at the same time. The sweet, eccentric girl who attends cuddle parties is getting buddy-buddy with a literal serial killer. Hilarious. Even better is Gil’s background reactions as he desperately tries to keep Edrisa away from the psychopath. hahaha <3

7:12 - Gil is currently living in a nightmare. hahahahaha

7:47 - I love this. I love how Malcolm and Ainsley interact. Malcolm is such a good big brother. IDK something about these two adult siblings chilling on a couch and warning each other about Mom’s current rampage reminds me of myself and my younger brother. <3 Warms my cold dead heart. <3 PLUS has anyone else noticed that (as long as Ainsley isn’t hounding Malcolm about a story or airing out his mental health diagnoses like the bs from Q&A) Malcolm is extremely calm around Ainsley. Like maybe the calmest we’ve ever seen him?

8:20 - “Oh Ainsley, that’s a horrible idea.” This is adorable. Malcolm is totally acting like Ainsley’s surrogate dad. He’s trying so hard to protect her. <3

8:42 - There’s something about the way that Malcolm says, “Hey Gil” that makes my heart swell. Idk why. I just their father/son relationship. So much. And it makes me so happy to see Malcolm having semi-normal interactions with people in general.

8:48 - This. Is. The. Funniest. Episode. Of. Prodigal. Son. To. Date. Holy shit. The comical dread on Malcolm’s face. Martin’s glee on the phone. Gil’s general “done with life” body language. Ainsley’s utter joy at her luck. MALCOLM DRAINING THE ALKA-SELTZER. Ainsley saying “chug chug”. So perfect.

9:27 - Is it just me or has Jessica been showing way more concern for her children’s well-being this season? At first I thought it was because she was so happy with Gil....but that’s not a thing anymore (because Jessica is a MORON - seriously if this show gets cancelled before Gil and Jessica are living happily ever after I will riot) so now Idk.

10:02 - EDRISA WHY DID YOU NOT TELL GIL AND MALCOLM THAT THE SURGEON WAS ON THE PHONE?!? For a hot second, poor Malcolm looks like he thinks he’s hallucinating.

10:40 - Gil hanging up on Martin and then telling Edrisa that she needs to make new friends is everything. It’s vicious. Gil looks absolutely furious in this scene and I love it.

11:07 - Yo. Edrisa’s got some baggage. hahaha Malcolm looks soooo uncomfortable with her outburst.

11:18 - I would pay good money to watch Martin and Gil have a pissing match in front of Malcolm every episode. It’s amazing. They’re constantly trying to one-up each other. The tension is palatable. And someone Malcolm is the only one acting like a mature, working adult. Malcolm. My mentally unstable, skinny millennial.

11:34 - OH SHIT. Martin did not just bring Jessica into this. Oh SNAP. Does Martin know that Jessica dumped Gil?!?

11:56 - “I’m going to need a little more than that.” Damn. Malcolm looks pissed here. Pretty sure he hates that Martin just brought up Gil/Jessica. Malcolm’s bio-dad and real dad are fighting and it’s very clear that Malcolm is on Gil’s side.

12:17 - The look that Gil and Malcolm share here is perfect. I love it so much. You can see how annoyed they both are, how much they hate that they need Martin on this case, how much neither of them want Martin’s help. <3

12:23 - SOMEONE GIVE GIL A MEDAL. This man just grit his teeth, smiled, and let MARTIN WHITLY - the man who tried to KILL HIM work on his case. Why? Because Malcolm silently asked him to. Because Gil loves Malcolm and knows that it’s better for Martin to work with them officially than for Malcolm to work with Martin in secret. At least this way he can look out for Malcolm.

12:42 - “It’s taken Dr. Marsh years...” soooo was Dr. Marsh the name of the Asian doctor leading group therapy last season? Is this just a new actor, same character scenario? OR am I supposed to forget that Asian doctor existed last season?

13:04 - I can’t tell if Gil hates this whole “father-son in group therapy idea”. He looks kind of like he hates it (although he is looking at Martin in the shot). I’m inclined to think that Gil is worried. He doesn’t like how nice Martin is acting toward Malcolm. He doesn’t want Malcolm to get hurt again. BUT I also think there’s probably a part of Gil that thinks group therapy might be beneficial for Malcolm’s mental health? I mean it was only ever going to be terrible or amazing. Nothing in between.

13:12 - “They hate you don’t they?” GIL BRINGING THE FIRE. hahahaha angry Gil is really funny.

13:43 - OH HELL YES. More Hector. <3

13:46 - hahaha YES. Hector this is Malcolm - the son. You know, the one you had to role-play? hahaha I feel like Hector is a really cool dude (aside from the murder).

13:53 - Damn. Hector pays attention in group. He has a lot of info about Malcolm. I would’ve thought the other inmates would just tune Martin out when he starts his monologues.

13:59 - “He’s got a thing with hands?” hahahaha OMG. How did I never connect the hand thing. DOES Malcolm have a thing with hands? ....I kind of want that to be cannon?

14:00 - “You’re crazier than me.” Ouch. That must’ve hurt. Think about it - Malcolm is ridden with guilt about Endicott. He’s haunted by what he experienced as a kid and by what his father is. Malcolm believes he’s broken beyond repair. On some level Malcolm thinks he’s crazy. Now a literal killer just told him he’s crazy. That just affirms what Malcolm already believes about himself. :( PLUS right after Hector tells Malcolm that he’s crazy - the camera pans to Martin. MARTIN looks scared. Martin is losing control of the situation and he doesn’t like it. Martin knows on some level that he ruined Malcolm’s mental health. He almost looks a little guilty?

14:31 - FINALLY. We have a cannon occurrence of someone calling Malcolm “Mal” (or “Malc” if you’re going by HULU’s subtitles?). I hope the writers start having people call Malcolm by Mal/Malc more often.

14:35 - I can’t ignore it anymore. DID HECTOR HAVE THAT SCAR ON HIS FACE LAST SEASON?!? I DON’T REMEMBER IT.

14:38 - YES YES. Malcolm looks angry. I LOVE IT. Scream at him Malcolm! Give him hell!

15:03 - Yikes. Malcolm sounds like he’s about to cry here. :( My heart breaks for him. .....I wonder if this is the first time Martin has ever heard how much pain he caused Malcolm straight from Malcolm? Martin looks hella uncomfortable here.

15:25 - The inmates (literal murderers) empathizing with Malcolm is twisted, beautiful, and haunting. These guys understand how much it sucks to hang out with Martin. These guys can see the real pain in Malcolm’s expression. They know he isn’t lying. Part of me honestly wonders if one of them is going to try and hurt Martin for Malcolm. They looked pissed enough by the end of the conversation that I kind of believe they might.

16:00 - Malcolm is not acting here. For once he’s not projecting his problems onto potential suspects. He’s just venting to suspects. No pretence. I love it. BUT 100% of me wants to know where Gil is during this session. Is Gil listening? Is the session being recorded for evidence? There’s no way Gil (or Dani) wouldn’t confront Malcolm about this. Even if they just asked him if he’s okay.

16:10 - hahahaha look at Doctor Marsh. He’s like “ooookkkkkaaaayyyy. I’m a psychiatrist in a psychiatric facility for people who have committed violent crimes. BUT THIS IS THE NUTTIEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN.”

16:12 - Look at the way Martin narrows his eyes. He’s trying to figure out if Malcolm is acting. He’s finally realizing that Malcolm truly hates what Martin subjected him to as a child. I honestly think this interaction will cause Martin to shift his “become a murderer like me” agenda from Malcolm to Ainsley. He’s finally seen the depth of Malcolm’s hatred and pain and knows deep down that Malcolm will never turn into a serial killer. But there’s still hope for Ainsley. That’s not to say that Martin won’t stop gaslighting Malcolm - he totally will.

17:10 - Martin has been at Claremont for 20 YEARS. How is it that he didn’t know a gold card existed?!?

17:21 - I honestly thought Marsh was going to get shanked. For the gold card. No other reason.

18:07 - It’s not supposed to be funny but Burt freaking out and punching Marsh is HYSTERICAL. hahahahaha

18:10 - That guard who pushed Malcolm out of the room and into a safe area? He’s in my good books. Every time I watch him push Malcolm to safety I want to give him a hug. Just for doing his job. What the hell is wrong with me?!?

18:18 - UGH. I hate that creepy, satisfied look that Martin gives Malcolm. It’s the same look he gave baby Malcolm in the pilot. It’s the “we’re the same” look and it clearly bothers Malcolm. :(

18:26 - Oh look. 18 minutes into the episode and we finally have a Dani appearance!! annnnnnd no mention of JT. I mean, I get it. He’s on paternity leave. I’m happy for him. BUT TWO EPISODES WITHOUT A JT APPEARANCE IS TORTURE. At least give me a throw away line about how happy JT is or about the baby!?? Honestly - it’s my biggest gripe with this episode.

18:56 - soooo either Dr. Marsh is a terrible psychiatrist OR you can’t “cure” murderers.

19:08 - The NYPD knows that Martin cured Jerry?!? HOW? Did Mr. David get Martin to admit to shocking him? Did Mr. David tell the police?!? I don’t remember Martin telling Malcolm. I specifically remember Malcolm saying, “I don’t want to know”

20:02 - Damn. I want Ainsley to go dark so badly. I want to see how badly it would destroy Malcolm and Jessica. I am evil.

20:52 - Malcolm’s burgundy jacket is gorgeous. That is all.

21:10 - Malcolm knows that Martin wants to escape. This is good. I love this.

21:55 - THERE’S A WOMENS WARD?!? REVOLUTIONARY INFORMATION. I THOUGHT THEY HAD A SEPARATE HOSPITAL.

22:00 - Oh wow. Finally - a perk to gender inequality.

22:52 - This Brightwell scene is so cute. I love watching Malcolm be excited about solving the crime. I love watching Dani gently tease him about how weird he is. I love watching them subtly flirt. Is Malcolm ready for another relationship - hell no. Do I think Dani has forgiven him - not totally. If they got together now it would end badly. But I do want them to be endgame.

23:11 - Andre is really suspicious throughout this whole scene. I’m convinced that if Dani and Malcolm weren’t too busy flirting Andre would’ve become a suspect really fast.

23:15 - Why do people get released from psychiatric prisons?!? This is a genuine question. I would’ve thought that everyone in Claremont has committed some seriously heinous crimes and only a very small portion of them are actually sick. The rest of them just pleaded insanity and had good lawyers. But even if they are/were sick. I don’t think the types of mental illnesses that drive people to murder and/or rape is something that can be cured. Sooo why are they getting released? I guess I just wonder because there’s this guy that’s been in my local news on and off for like 10+ years. He’s molested/raped many young women between the ages of about 16-25. He’s been arrested and released multiple times. He keeps getting released to different major cities in my province (usually a city with a big University) and reoffends within 6 months of being released. Most recently he was arrested last month after being released in October 2020. Clearly he’s going to keep reoffending - so why does he keep getting released? I guess I just don’t understand what the criteria are that allow an inmate who has committed that sort of crime to be released. Here’s a link to one of the more recent news stories if you’re interested: https://vancouverisland.ctvnews.ca/police-warn-of-high-risk-sex-offender-moving-to-victoria-1.5149264

23:23 - hahaha Andre is like, “Yo. This dude is freaky.”

24:15 - Look at how proud Malcolm is of his whole “lobster = murderer” profile. <3 So freaking precious. <3 and Dani looks so amused with him. <3

24:37 - Sooooo Mr. David isn’t listening to this conversation? He left the room?

24:40 - Jessica going to Martin for parenting help is terrifying. This is a woman in crisis.

25:20 - But Jessica was right to be paranoid in 97′. She wasn’t being cheated on romantically but her husband was murdering people.

25:24 - Martin is so selling his kids out here. He knows it. He doesn’t care. He’s having too much fun torturing Jessica. He’s rejoicing at the fact that he gets to play the “I turned the kids to the dark side” card.

26:40 - Poor Jessica. She looks suspicious and scared. Scared that she raised a killer even though she tried desperately to prevent that very behaviour.

26:56 - Damn. Martin is having a really good day. First he gets to annoy Gil Arroyo in the flesh. Then Edrisa talks medical with him. Then he gets to work with Malcolm. THEN his ex-wife calls him and he gets to toy with her mind. THEN his daughter, who has literally murdered someone comes to visit him. He is a proud Dad right here and he’s having an amazing day.

28:00 - Rhonda is terrifying. This girl has perfected the “I’m sweet and unthreatening” while lying and manipulating people. I swear she’s a teenage Queen B personality with a side of violence.

28:30 - I love how protective Malcolm is of Ainsley. Look how positively livid he is that Marin is talking to her. Malcolm is terrified that Martin is going to purposefully and successfully turn Ainsley into a serial killer. Malcolm doesn’t want to lose his sister. He doesn’t want Jessica to lose her ‘stable’ child.

29:09 - This scares me. This is the kind of Ainsley behaviour from last season that made me believe she is the Whitly child most like Martin. Her ruthlessness and lack of a conscience when it comes to looking for a news story is extremely upsetting.

30:11 - What the hell happened to Tevin? AND WATKINS?!? We got no closure on those guys. Are they dead? In prison? Is Tevin still in Claremont? Were they transferred to facilities outside of New York State?

30:28 - Malcolm yelling at Martin is perfect. *chef’s kiss* Finally this boy is being honest with his father and he isn’t holding back.

30:40 - Michael Sheen is an incredible actor. This is an Emmy worthy scene. By Sheen AND Payne.

30:48 - I love how you can see Mr. David just chilling. Sitting outside the door and staring across the hall during this scene. It’s just....can’t he hear the screaming?!? Is he just like, “I can’t take anymore of this today. Not my circus and not my monkeys.”

30:55 - Soooooo this is Martin showing his true colours. There’s definitely a part of Martin that hates Malcolm. I honestly wonder if that part of Martin actively tries/tried to emotionally torture Malcolm now and throughout his childhood.

31:00 - “And your mother. And you ruined HeR!!!”....does this mean Martin was trying to make Ainsley a serial killer? Maybe after the camping trip when he realized Malcolm was too “weak” to kill anyone? Is this Martin saying that Ainsley is ruined because she didn’t become a serial killer? Or that Ainsley is ruined because she killed Endicott?

31:05 - “But that’s not me.” hahaha OMG. Michael Sheen just flipped between two personalities like nobody’s business. Respect.

31:08 - Martin’s outburst hurt Malcolm. Badly. You can see it all over his face. Even now, when Malcolm is being strong and showing some backbone to Martin, Martin can wound Malcolm with a single phrase. :(

31:41 - soooo where has Gil been for the past 10 minutes of this episode?

32:02 - Sooooo did Andre kill Jerry for Rhonda? Or did he just know about the murder and keep quiet for Rhonda? Or is his oblivious to the fact that Rhonda killed Jerry? I’m honestly confused here.

32:20 - Holy shit. Rhonda is crazy. Andre is dead now. Right?

32:48 - Wait. Why did Andre have a gold card? Mr. David only has red. What kind of qualifications does a guard need to get a gold card vs blue, green, or red?!?!

32:55 - Claremont isn’t a punishment for Martin. Solitary is. Martin should live in solitary. He deserves to suffer for his crimes (and the ongoing torture of his son).

33:05 - How messed up is it that Mr. David’s job is to protect a serial killer? I don’t think I’m brave enough to do something like that. I also don’t know if I could do that for moral reasons.

33:14 - Damn. That elevator looks like it hasn’t been cleaned since it was installed. It’s sooo much nastier than the hallway outside of the elevator.

33:50 - Sooo does this mean Martin is eventually going to try and murder someone down here?

33:54 - HE CALLED FOR BACKUP <3 <3 <3 OUR BOY IS GROWING UP AND I’M SO PROUD. <3

35:40 - FINALLY SOME MALCOLM WHUMP. <3 THIS SEASON HAS BEEN LACKING IT.

36:00 - This is really interesting to me. I honestly wonder if Martin has some sort of split personality disorder (personality #1: murderous, selfish, psychopath; personality #2: loving, concerned father and lawful doctor). You can see how desperately he wants to escape. But also how much he loves his son. I honestly thought he was going to leave Malcolm to die.

36:06 - Ugh. Look at his whumped face. <3 <3 <3 ....one thing that I couldn’t stop thinking during all the tazing (which was amazing FYI, I’m not complaining) is this: in QxA (1x07) Mr. David says that he only has a single shot tazer. Why did Andre have a multi-shot tazer? Is this a gold card vs red card thing?

36:40 - WHY THE EFF DOES BACKUP NOT INCLUDE GIL?!?! I KNOW HE’S STILL IN THE BUILDING.

37:03 - MARTIN, IF YOU TOUCH A HAIR ON DANI’S HEAD I WILL PERSONALLY HUNT YOU DOWN AND KILL YOU MYSELF. He honestly looks like he wants to murder her.

37:50 - Martin’s speech is not going to help Malcolm’s mental state. At all.

38:31 - No. No. No. Martin you do NOT get to talk to Dani on a first name basis. Look at how much Dani hates it.

38:35 - I love how soft Malcolm looks as Martin lifts him up. Look at how Malcolm gently leans into the touch. It breaks my heart. After 20 years Malcolm is still comforted by physical contact with his father. :(

38:37 - “Put your hands on me again Dr. Whitly, and I’ll blow your head off.” OH HELL YES. Dani is my hero. Iconic. Also - anyone else notice that Dani is chewing gum in this scene (I don’t think she’s chewed gum on camera since the pilot?) it makes her look like so much more of a badass in this scene.

38:55 - Oh look. The rest of the backup finally showed up. Where were these assholes 5 minutes ago when DANI WAS ALONE? AND WHERE IS GIL?!?!

39:00 - Malcolm thanking Dani is so so precious. And the fact that he’s clearly struggling to breathe and stay conscious is giving me life. ALSO Dani saying, “YOU’re welcome.”?!? *chef’s kiss* :) :) <3

39:30 - So Malcolm definitely knows that Martin almost left him to die so that Martin could escape.

39:33 - ......Ainsley is currently living with Jessica. Why is Ainsley not at the family dinner? We literally see her in the house in like 30 seconds.

39:35 - Malcolm in a polo shirt. Malcolm in a polo shirt. Why is it so attractive?!? He looks like a baby cinnamon roll? <3

39:51 - WHO THE EFF LET AINSLEY INTO THE MURDER BASEMENT?!? WHY AM I EXPECTED TO BELIEVE THAT JESSICA DIDN’T RE-SEAL IT AFTER WATKINS?!?!

40:15 - Jessica desperately tearing apart the living room is heartbreaking. :(

40:29 - Question: Did Jessica send her staff home before she tore apart the living room? Because I can just imagine two of them staring into the living room from the hall like, “She’s finally snapped. Should we call someone?”

41:00 - Jessica is the queen of drama. HOLY SHIT. This reveal was so extra and so perfect.

41:13 - “I killed him.” “You’re lying.” I love this interaction between Jessica and Malcolm. Malcolm has spent his whole life trying to convince people that he’s not a murderer. To protect Ainsley, his baby sister, he will say the words “I killed him”. Even though that is literally killing a part of Malcolm. Jessica knows it. I love that Jessica can see that Malcolm is lying. She’s not trying to convince herself that he’s innocent. She literally just accused him of murder. She’s scared. Because Malcolm just admitted to killing someone - his biggest fear - and it was a lie.

41:35 - Watching Bellamy Young’s facial expression as Jessica realizes that Ainsley killed Endicott is a thing of beauty. This woman needs an Emmy too. HELL, CAN WE GIVE THIS WHOLE EPISODE AN EMMY?!?!

42:00 - Poor Jessica. The guilt she must feel. She’s always thought that Malcolm was the one at risk of being a murderer. He’s a boy (they’re statistically more prone to violence than girls), he was older than Ainsley, he remembers terrible things, Malcolm had continued exposure to Martin throughout his childhood (Ainsley didn’t - I think?). But the child she neglected, the child she thought was safe, the child she thought remained free of Martin’s evil killed someone. It’s a plot-twist that just ripped Jessica’s heart into a million pieces.

42:30 - Yep. I promise you Malcolm has been psychoanalyzing Ainsley’s past behaviours since the moment she killed Endicott. He’s found traits common to serial killers and he’s terrified that she’ll become one if she remembers what it felt like to kill Endicott. He’s probably kicking himself for not noticing sooner. He’s probably questioning his ability as a profiler and as a big brother. AND the fact that MALCOLM has to protect Jessica AND Ainsley is heartbreaking. It’s way too big a burden. No wonder Malcolm’s mental health is on a downward spiral.

42:33 - This is the moment Jessica begins grieving for Ainsley. The fear, disbelief, and horror on her face. It’s torture that I can only describe as someone telling a mother that her daughter is dead. Because Ainsley is dead. The person Jessica believed Ainsley was - that little girl is dead. Because Jess just found out the truth.

42:55 - Jessica is now terrified of her own daughter. That is maybe the most upsetting thing this show has given us.

43:00 - I saw an interesting theory about how Ainsley is regressing back to her childhood (crawling into bed with Mom, moving back in with Mom) and I must say - that would be a really interesting way for this story to go. Ainsley regressing to a child-like state as she is convicted of murder. As a result she ends up in the women’s ward of Claremont because she can plead insanity.

This episode was amazing. Seriously, one of the best Prodigal Son episodes to date. Definitely the best of season 2 so far. If you’ve read this far - thanks for hanging out.

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shirophic · 3 years

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close nights | mm!naegiri fic

here’s the mastermind!naegiri fic i promised BAAHAHAHA VERY INSPIRED BY SONGS AND THERES A FAMILIAR QUOTE AT THE END IM PRETTY SURE MOST OF YALL HAVE HEARD ngl i feel like it went too quick but honestly idc give me feedback warnings: mentions of death, blood, stabbing, major character deaths

The night was cold, colder than usual.

Kyoko Kirigiri entered the security room, sighing as she sat down in the cool, blue chair. As she scanned her eyes across all the different cameras, quite a few things were on her mind. The 4th trial had ended, with alter ego’s death replaying in the minds of the students. Despair rotted within the students as fear shook them. Alter ego was their only hope, and now they were crushed.

Kirigiri watched as Asahina sobbed in her pillow, Hagakure trying to calm himself down, Togami reading as if nothing happened, Fukawa having a panic attack... Kirigiri bored her eyes into each of the footage from the cameras. Careful trying not to miss anything. Up until she reached a certain CCTV footage caught her eye.

A boy holding up a sign. The boy was Makoto Naegi, Ultimate Lucky Student. Kirigiri knew better than that, she was the Ultimate Detective for a reason. She knew that talent was a deception, after all, what kind of talent is the “Ultimate Lucky Student”?

Kirigiri knew his real ultimate was despair, a sickening depth of darkness, tearing down others.

To put it down to simpler words, It was his specialty.

Kirigiri never really understood the reason for despair. Sure, without despair there is no hope, but what was the real meaning behind it? Her ultimate was the Ultimate Detective, aren’t detectives supposed to be fighting against despair in the name of hope? Oh well, she was pretty much forced into this.

Turning her attention back to the green-eyed boy, she noticed there were words on the sign, with a grinning Naegi as he tried to stand tall enough to show the message.

“What an idiot. How did he become the Ultimate Despair again?”

The sign said “Come meet me in our special spot! Wear something pretty!” with a lopsided smiley face.

Once holding it for about 10 more seconds, he ran with the sign. Kirigiri had no idea what he had stored in that deceptive of a mind, but probably something not good.

- - -

As Kirigiri strode over to their “special place” Naegi was setting up something. Something like a room filled with candles and roses.

Rose petals and rose vines adorned the walls and floors. Candles were set up as yellow light shown in the darkness. Vodka and other drinks were lined up on a table, all set up for the night. Sure, it was cheesy, but something he put too much effort in. About a minute passed until Kirigiri arrived, Naegi staggered to fix his tie and suit, waiting at the entrance. As he looked up to meet with her eyes, he paused in amazement.

Kirigiri was wearing a deep purple dress that went just above her ankles with long gloves. Purple heels allowed her to have a little more height against Naegi. And her hair was up in a ponytail, with a purple bow to match. In all words, she was stunning. Naegi stood there agape as he looked at Kirigiri (respectfully of course.)

“Well? Are you just going to stand there looking like a reincarnation of Kuwata’s hair? Or are you going to explain what this is?” smirked Kirigiri, Naegi could have sworn he saw Kirigiri blush.

“Ah yes of course..” Mumbled Naegi as he looked down. “I.. I wanted us to take some time alone with each other, seeing as we get too caught up with the killing game and making sure none of them finds out about… about us..” spoke Naegi, softly.

Kirigiri’s smirk softened, seeing a side she saw many times, but not like this. Was this a confession? Perhaps a prank? She had known the boy for far too long to just not expect this wasn’t one of his other little pranks.

“Well then… In that case, let us take some time with each other.”

With that, Naegi and Kirigiri spent time talking and letting out their struggles. “It’s hard to keep track of what I've said and what I've not! It’s like I have to create a mental script..”

“You.. don’t have a mental script?” “You do!?”

As the night went on, Naegi played some music.

“Oh.. Isn’t this Lacrimosa?” questioned Kirigiri.

“Yea! Sometimes it calms me down when times are rough for me,” exclaimed Naegi.

Kirigiri didn’t respond as she looked like she was lost in thought.

“You’re thinking about your past again, aren’t you?” whispered Naegi.

Kirigiri turned to glance at Naegi, a stoic but slightly saddened expression on her face, “You.. You don’t need to worry about me. I can handle myself perfectly fine, just some… memories.”

Naegi examined Kirigiri for a while before standing up and lending Kirigiri his hand.

“Hey, I’m no doctor or therapist but, maybe a waltz will get it off your mind,” suggested Naegi.

Kirigiri opened her mouth for a bit, but completely drew a blank. Eventually, she surrendered and took Naegi’s hand.

They danced to Lacrimosa until it came upon an end.

Naegi slightly lifted his head to Kirigiri’s lavender eyes, yet couldn’t make out what was in them, sadness? Regret? Anger? He’ll never know.

Kirigiri had many thoughts as she slowly danced with Naegi, but she held them off for the time being, as they both wanted time together. And she didn’t want her depressing thoughts to ruin it.

Kirigiri and Naegi made eye contact as their thoughts disappeared, only focusing on each other now.

Kirigiri suddenly stopped, being aware of her surroundings and what she was doing - dancing. And with whom she was dancing with. “I.. Don’t you think it’s a bit… well, late for this?” Kirigiri questioned, “I wouldn’t want to be caught, god knows what they’re up to…” Naegi paused and chuckled for a bit. “We’re the ones in charge, aren’t we? Where is their god now?” Kirigiri looked down, not saying anything. “Where is their god now?” typical Naegi…” “if you don’t want to do this right now, why not grab a drink with me?” Kirigiri looked at Naegi with slight amusement, “why the niceties now?” but gave in, as her throat ached with thirst.

Naegi laughed quietly, then led Kirigiri to the food and drinks stand. Naegi grabbed a bottle of vodka and poured

“Hm, don’t you think we’re too young to be drinking?” “We’re 18 now, did you forget? Oh yea, Junko erased your memories as well.”

Kirigiri got lost in thought as she remembered the previous ultimate despair Junko Enoshima was the previous despair. Keyword: previous. Naegi and Enoshima had been partners for quite a while, a feared duo. After “The Tragedy” and after class 78 got converted to a new school for a safe shelter, Enoshima and Naegi were already putting their plan into action. They made sure everything was sealed and “safe” and after about a year, Enoshima forced them into the killing game. Unbeknownst to the other 15 students, Naegi was also in this plan from behind the scenes. And after the first death (Ikusaba), Naegi and Enoshima got into a fight.

- - -

An angry Naegi burst through the doors of the security room, opening to a gleeful-looking Enoshima.

Naegi never had any thoughts on Ikusaba, she was just another pawn in Enoshima’s plan. But she always had to make things complicated for him.

“Enoshima!” Naegi yelled, “How could you just let Ikusaba die like that? Do you know how risky that was.. If they found out-”

“Which they won’t, honestly Naegi you’re too paranoid,” Enoshima said unbothered. “And If they did I’m sure you can just kill them off like a fly.”

Naegi had a dark look on his face, “And what would be the explanation for that? Tell me.”

“I-”

“Oh! Togami just pissed me off! So I killed him in cold blood, upupupupu!”

Enoshima took a stand, an annoyed look displayed on her face.

“Look Naegi, if you’re just going to argue about the past, fuck off, it can’t be changed and you know that.”

Naegi quietly chuckled, which turned into full-on laughter.

“AHA- HAHAHAHA, you think I’m just going to accept giving up like that? Well unbeknownst to you, Enoshima, I have a few cards up my sleeve as well..”

Naegi swiftly threw a card at Enoshima’s face, giving a fresh cut to her cheek. Enoshima looked at Naegi in disbelief, gently touching her face.

“H- How dare you,” Enoshima said, bewildered.

Naegi looked at her in amusement, “Was that not entertaining for you enough, Enoshima?”

Enoshima growled, spitting at Naegi.

“Fuck you,”

“Pay me.”

Naegi quickly moved behind Enoshima, slicing the back of her neck, then putting her up against the wall with a knife under her chin, complimenting her facial features.

“Well now, the shorty finally decided to grow some balls, huh?” Enoshima teased, wincing as the cut behind her neck burned.

“You know damn well I grew some balls ever since I even started our little plan. Have a nice time in hell, Enoshima.” Naegi sneered, looking up at the despair twin.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be saving you a seat.”

Naegi then sliced her neck, pink blood dripping from the knife and onto Naegi’s hand.

Naegi hummed, dropping Enoshima on the floor, disgust filling his senses. “As much as I love bringing people into despair, the stench of blood is disgusting.”

Naegi then washed his hands and ordered monokuma to clean the mess up before heading towards his dorm room, pretending as if nothing happened.

- - -

“Hello? Earth to Kirigiri?” Naegi waved his hand in front of Kirigiri’s face.

Kirigiri was brung back into reality, realization striking her that she was lost in thought.

“O-oh, Naegi. Sorry, I was lost in thought… again.” Kirigiri said rather embarrassingly, glanced at the shot she was holding, and gulped it down.

“It’s okay Kirigiri,” Naegi spoke as he had doubt in his eyes. He then took a shot, shaking his head.

“Hey Kirigiri, I know I invited you here myself but, there’s another place I wanna show you, care to join me?”

Kirigiri pondered for a minute, should she really go with a murderer who killed the ultimate despair only just to become the ultimate despair himself? Kirigiri sighed, he couldn’t kill her because of her secret anyways. Kirigiri remembered how desperate he was to know the secret.

- - -

(beginning of chapter 3)

Naegi whined as he followed Kirigiri around pleading.

“Oh Kirigiri pleaaase!” he begged, “Let me know your secret!”

Kirigiri stopped and looked at Naegi, “why do you want to learn my secret so much?”

Naegi scoffed, “Well obviously because you’ve mentioned it once before and never told me! I thought I was your best friend..”

Kirigiri shook her head and continued to walk towards the physics lab, a click in her steps.

- - -

Oh well, it’s not like she has much of a choice.

Kirigiri sighed and followed Naegi, hoping that it would mean something good.

- - -

Naegi led Kirigiri up to the roof of the school, looking back from tie to time with a smile on his face.

Once on the roof, Naegi invited Kirigiri to sit down. The area was outgrown, plants growing everywhere. Fires all around the building, blazes and flames of fire all around the base of the school, the sun setting with a red aura.

Smoke filling Kirigiri's senses, she coughed. “W-Where are we Naegi?” she said as she looked at Naegi. Naegi’s face was lightened with red, orange, and yellow hues as he grinned down upon the world, eyes sparkling with delight.

“We’re.. We’re at the top of the world,” Naegi smiled.

Kirigiri glanced at Naegi with a confused expression but stoic eyes as she looked Naegi up and down.

“Quit the act, why did you bring me here?” Kirigiri demanded.

Naegi turned around, surprised. “Kirigiri, I just wanted to spend time with yo-”

“Stop, I know you’re lying to me. Spit it out.”

Naegi sighed with an annoyed tone and looked Kirigiri directly in the eye.

“I want to know your secret.”

Kirigiri was disappointed, but not surprised. Naegi was an awfully ambitious person and would go to extraordinary heights to get what he wanted, but Kirigiri was awfully stubborn.

“And exactly why should I tell you? For all I know, you could kill me instantly after.” Kirigiri doubted.

“Well for one, you can get out alive!” Naegi laughed, “But you’re not getting away this easily, Kirigiri.”

Kirigiri carefully examined the options she had; A: make a run for it, B: punch him and run, C: tell him and live. She knew with plans A and B he could easily either send monokuma after her or just kill her himself. And with plan C he could also be lying. So in all, it’s a win-lose situation.

Kirigiri sighed and made up her mind.

“I’m not telling you, whether you kill me or not. And besides, even you don’t know the secrets of this school, you need me.”

Naegi examined her closely again, then swiftly took out knives, throwing them all at Kirigiri. Which she dodged them all, even catching one. She threw the knife aside and stepped forward towards Naegi.

“You know you need me, you can’t do anything without me. Give up.”

Naegi growled, “shut up, shut up, shut up!”

With a few knives cutting Kirigiri’s dress and skin, she fell on the ground, backing away from Naegi.

She winced in pain as she looked up at Naegi, her vision blurring as she tried to make out what to do. Naegi stopped in front of her, playing with the knife in his hands before kneeling down in front of her face, lifting her chin up with the knife.

“You know Kirigiri, you’re an intelligent person with lots of room for improvement. I never wanted to come to this conclusion, but if you’re not going to work with me here, we’re going to have a problem.” threatened Naegi.

Kirigiri glared up at Naegi, keeping full eye contact.

“I’m not giving in, no matter what little tricks you have in store.”

Naegi rolled his eyes in annoyance, then putting his knife hard against her neck, “if you oblige, I’ll make your death quick and painless, if you don’t - well then you’re gonna have a fun time suffering.”

Kirigiri stared at Naegi in silence watching as her blood dripped down from her neck and onto everywhere.

Naegi then grew tired of waiting and sliced Kirigiri’s throat leaving her dead blank face the last expression she’ll ever make again.

He then stood up and started walking towards the exit down back to the school, when he heard something.

“I-Ikusaba… she’s alive, an…” Naegi whipped around, anxious, as he urged Kirigiri to continue. “And… she’s o-out for you..”

Naegi was stunned into silence. Ikusaba.. was alive? And she wanted vengeance? Naegi was very confused about this whole proposition. This was Kirigiri’s secret? Naegi then looked at Kirigiri again waiting for more information. But to no avail, Kirigiri’s eyes rid of the light and grew dead.

Naegi then started pacing around, wondering what to do next. Should he try to find Ikusaba? Should he kill Ikusaba once and for all? Should he-

Naegi was then interrupted by a figure in the shadows. He turned around to look who it is, but he couldn’t make out who it was until they stepped into the light.

“Naegi,” a cool monotone voice spoke, “We meet again.”

The figure then stepped into the light - a face known too well.

Mukuro Ikusaba. The other despair twin. Also known as the ultimate soldier. The last time Naegi and Ikusaba met was when they were putting the plan into action and putting the students in the classrooms. After that they barely interacted.

Naegi knew Ikusaba was dangerous. Her talent gave it away, after all. She knew tons of different strategies, and while Enoshima liked to say that the strategies were hers’ - spoiler alert: they were not.

Turning back to reality, Naegi began thinking of different tactics to well ah, slaughter his close friend.

Ikusaba read Naegi like a book, and took out her dagger - to which Naegi replied to taking his own out as well.

“Impressive, I saw what you did with Kirigiri. You’ve worked on your reflexes.” complimented Ikusaba. “But you’re no match for me.”

“You think so?”

“I know so.”

“Alright, let’s dance.”

#look i did something! 🕊️ request accepted #🙤 · mod tsumugi #mastermind naegi #mastermind makoto #mastermind kyoko #mastermind kirigiri #mm!naegiri #naegi x kirigiri #naegiri #makoto naegi x kyoko kirigiri #makoto naegi #makoto x kyoko #kyoko kirigiri #dr1 #dr1 kyoko #dr1 makoto #tsumugi-mikan

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emmybluefire · 6 years

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Heroes, Power-playing, and Villians

First off: I want to apologize sincerely for the lack of RP related posts of late. I haven’t been on much due to the holiday season hitting my store hard, and overall I’ve been struggling to find my creativity. As well as my motivation.

But enough of that.

Second off: This post may wind up being rather long (My rambles typically do) so I’m just going to put a text break riiiiiiight here. XD

ALRIGHT! SO!

I’ve been scrolling through some of your guys’ pages quite a bit recently, and came across a rather interesting discussion on @thalsianiii ‘s page.

(http://thalsianiii.tumblr.com/post/167725376592/psa For quick access)

Simply put, a Villian is a villian. They are written as antagonists and will be antagonistic! Don’t expect them to be nice to your character, and don’t treat them like a punching bag. If they’re a powerful character, don’t expect them to be easy to take down if your character pisses them off. And remember, that just because the character is a villian, you have NO RIGHT to kill them without consent. That is somebody else’s creation you’d be destroying if you did.

I agree with ALL of this. I truly do. So... enough said right? Well. No. I’m here today to talk about a little more than that. In reading this... one line stuck out to me.

“Just because your character is sassy and spunky, doesn’t automatically give them the right to try and be disrespectful to someone who is most likely superior to them.”

Now this... well, it got me thinking.

“What if my good character is powerful?”

Now, In the context of the line this question seems to have no point. If you’re RPing a powerful “good” character, you still don’t have the right to treat a villian with disrespect for no particular reason. That was the point of the statement. However... my mind works in very disjointed and unorthodox ways.

What was actually going through my head was this:

“Why is it socially acceptable for a villian to be powerful, but not a hero?”

The reason being: Emmy, Me... I was a guard for the longest time. And Emmy; as a blue dragon mage--who declined archmagedom--has always been a powerful character at her core. Always.

She’s capable of altering the flow of gravity, creating tiny black holes, and just straight up changing the laws of physics for a short time. She’s an intelligent, knowledgeable, teacher who has preformed feats such as creating pocket dimensions and utterly de-atomizing demons.

However... despite all of this, she’s set personal limits for herself. She knows that breaking the laws of reality has some dire consequences. Civil and physical ones, not just on her, but the environment around her. She hates hurting people, and Titans forbid she kills them. And hence, she almost never does any of the things she’s more than capable of doing. She prefers to outwit her opponents in most situations. Confusing them enough to render them mentally incapacitated, or straight up fooled into thinking she’s someone else. And if she has to use magic, she keeps it at a minimum. Applying simple spells intelligently to get the maximum effect out of minimal power. Your target is running away? Conjure arcane bonds around their feet. Make them trip. Two worgen are in a fight that’s endangering civilians? A simple arcane blast to the back of the neck should do the trick. (typically knocks them out) And when she does cast spells, I often emote them in such a way that people have a chance to interrupt her before she pops it off.

But even doing that , I was continuously reeed at for god-modding, and power-playing. Why? Really... Asking around? I was never able to get a straight answer. And I was often left confused because... the people yelling at me? They were perfectly fine with the antagonistic character being uber powerful. Or they were the uber powerful antagonistic character. And when I tried to stand up for myself? I was often shot down. Not just by those involved, but by my fellow guild members as well.

So... slowly but surely, I came to the conclusion that villians are the only people allowed to be powerful. And I was just supposed to stick with being a grunt.

“But why?” I often asked myself.

Why was it okay for a villian to be powerful, but not me? Well... in truth. Thinking about it now... there may have been a few subtle reasons. Villians are supposed to be big, scary threats. That’s what makes them intimidating. A seemingly unstoppable force a hero has to overcome. You see it all the time in films, books, and video-games. Taking on the villian 1v1 is suicide. S/he can only be defeated by putting them under certain conditions.

(Spoiler alert: Thor Ragnarok )

Even in Thor Ragnarok: Where the hero’s were so overpowered they were almost marry sues, this was the case. Hela, goddess of death, was the very definition of unstoppable. Alone she annihilated an Asgardian army, survived getting stabbed from behind straight through the abdomen, shot at by heavy-duty gunships (destroying them in the process), the “Biggest lightning blast in the history of lightning blasts!”, raised the dead, and nearly destroyed a massive fucking space ship. And yet... Thor and Loki discovered exactly how to beat her. By summoning Serter, and forcing Ragnarok to come to pass.

(End Spoiler )

That’s how it’s always been with villians. So by introducing a hero who’s evenly matched with the villian? Well... despite this being more realistic, it breaks ALL KINDS of common norms. And that get’s even worse when you introduce a hero who’s just straight up more powerful than the villian.

But the thing is... in a universe like WoW’s , where magic exists and certain people are jus- more attuned to it than others, or have practiced it for much longer? You’re GOING to have characters that are just simply more powerful than others! It’s just a fact. Be they hero or villian, it will happen!

So... at the end of the day. What I suppose I’m trying to say is: communicate with your antagonists. Give them the basics of what they’ll be getting into. And be “realistic” (Hard to apply that term to magic... but I’m sure you an deduce what I mean.) with your posts. And always remember the golden rule: Don’t do ANYTHING that removes control from another player’s character, without their OOC consent! That is all. c:

To those of you who got through this entire thing: Jesus fuck you’re a trooper! XD, and thank you SO much for reading! I love all of you! And please, have a good day or night. Wherever you are. :)

#writing #rp #roleplay #villian #hero #power gameing #discussion #wow #world of warcraft #wra #wyrmrest accord #ooc

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anoldwound · 7 years

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Adventures in Stupidity (With Your Host, Mike Newton) - Mike/Edward [Twilight]

Title: Adventures in Stupidity (With Your Host, Mike Newton) Characters/Pairing: Mike/Edward (one-sided) Rating: soft R Spoilers/Warnings: Some sexual content. Word Count: 3731 Summary: So how could he have a crush on Edward Cullen? Obviously he didn’t, since he didn’t act like a gay guy, and so he wasn’t gay, and therefore he did not have a crush on Edward Cullen. A/N: Spawned from the Mike Newton Music/Fic Meme I did a while back. Enjoy! ^_^ It was one of Mike's best-kept secrets that it wasn't Edward Cullen he was jealous of -- it was Bella Swan. The way it had all started was completely stupid, you see. An accident, really. It had just been a glance out of the corner of his eye -- the first day of school was when it had happened -- and Mike saw him, impossibly good-looking; almost too attractive to be human. The glance became a stare as he looked at this person in bewilderment (Who is this guy, and how did he get to be so smoking hot? And look at his clothes -- ugh, it’s always the rich people that are the most attractive; it’s so typical… he’s really very good-looking, though) and an irritated scowl was shot in his direction from the mysterious, broody-looking guy. What the hell’s HIS problem? Mike thought as the guy angrily shoved his hands into his pockets and walked away. Mike shrugged and mostly forgot about it. Until the guy showed up in his English class during fourth period, that is. Due to the teacher’s extremely odd method of arranging the seating chart, Mike was forced to sit next to the dude (whose name was Edward Cullen, apparently). Cullen did not look too happy about this, and inched his desk away from Mike once he sat down. Mike furrowed his brows in confusion, feeling slightly hurt despite himself. He hadn’t even said anything to him. What the hell had he done to piss this guy off? That nagging little question hung in the back of his mind all day, from gym class to science class to lunch to math class to photography class to home. Mike laid down on his bed and stared up at the ceiling, going through the whole day in his head, trying to figure out what he could’ve possibly done to make this Edward guy glare at him like that, and coming up with nothing. Unless he’d given him a funny look without realizing it. But you’d have to be incredibly sensitive to get so offended from a look that wasn’t strong enough to give the person making the face a clue that they were even making a face at all; and for that matter -- Then Mike realized that he was being monumentally stupid over something that didn’t even matter, and got up from his bed to go play some video games. Still, though, Edward Cullen was really, really good-looking. ---- Mike’s mother had a habit of saying that when Mike falls, he falls hard, and fast. It was a statement that was entirely too true, if he had to be honest. The first week of school had barely been out before he had found himself fostering a ridiculous man-crush on Edward Cullen, and it was seriously freaking him out. He wasn’t supposed to like guys -- that was a weird thing reserved for the ultra-feminine, diva queen, fashionable guys like the school’s resident Gay Dude, Lester Keigwin, who pranced around in pink shirts and really tight pants and talked with a lisp. And Lester was cool, and a friend of Mike’s, but still. Mike was not like that. So how could he have a crush on Edward Cullen? Obviously he didn’t, since he didn’t act like a gay guy, and so he wasn’t gay, and therefore he did not have a crush on Edward Cullen. Convinced by his sound logic on the subject, Mike managed to rationalize the “crush” into mere admiration; it was hard not to admire Edward’s beauty, after all, and it was perfectly reasonable to notice that another member of the male species was good-looking. It wasn’t out of the ordinary at all. But that didn’t explain why it got him off when he thought about Edward Cullen sucking his dick. That had caught him completely by surprise one evening while he had been “taming the beast”. He had been thinking about normal stuff for the most part -- boobs, that sort of thing -- when all of a sudden, towards the end, he had the mental image of Cullen sucking him off. And that was when he came, fast and hard, with a loud groan that made him grateful that he was the only one in the house. Oh, God. He was gay. Mike spent the next day in an incredibly heightened state of paranoia -- oh God, they had to all know, what if someone knew, they could probably tell by the look on his face; was he sashaying his hips now? Oh God Lester was looking at him, he must know, gays can tell their own and OH GOD HE WAS GOING TO DIE HE WAS GOING TO DIE WASN’T HE. He was going to get beaten to death with sticks by the football team after school; he just knew it. But he wasn’t murdered by the stick-wielding football team at the end of the day, and nobody had said anything to him, so Mike went home feeling stupid again. At least Cullen had been absent. Although Mike also felt sad about that at the same time -- English class just wasn’t the same without Cullen sitting next to him. ---- He attempted to distract himself, in the meantime -- going out with girls on the weekends, participating more in sports, studying a lot… and while it worked to the extent that he didn’t think about Cullen during the day, there was no escaping the dirty, pornographic thoughts that invaded his mind while he was trying to go to sleep. His parents had become concerned that he was developing insomnia when, for the fourth night in a row, he only got three hours sleep, and it had taken a lot of convincing to get them to believe that he was just worried about his mid-terms. It was weird, though, how easy it was for him to get these terrible crushes on people he barely knew. He didn’t like to think of himself as being shallow, but the only things he actually knew about Edward Cullen were that he was fucking gorgeous and that he was a foster kid with equally gorgeous foster siblings (seriously, how does that work out?). He’d never spoken to him, not even to ask about homework or to borrow a pen or something stupid like that. Part of it was a fear of stuttering like a moron and blushing and revealing to the entire world that he had a crush on this guy, but another part of it was that he was scared that the ideas that he’d formed about Cullen in his head would turn out not to be true. That’s it, Mike thought. I’ll talk to Cullen tomorrow. Even just to say hi. I gotta say something to him. His mind immediately started warning him against taking such an action, but Mike was firmly resolved and would not budge from his decision, no matter how many times his mind reminded him of the possibility of football players with sticks. ---- Mike sat down in his usual seat next to Cullen the following day. His heart was hammering erratically in his ribcage, and his stomach felt as though it had dropped about 40,000 feet below ground. Would he even be able to make it through the class alive, let alone say something to Edward fucking Cullen? The mere thought of it was about to make him go into cardiac arrest. “Um --” he turned to Cullen, and was immediately struck by the strange, black color of his eyes. Funny, he didn’t remember them being black a couple weeks ago… “Yes?” Cullen asked, stiffly. “Just… um… nothing,” he muttered, averting his gaze and facing back to the front. God, he was such an idiot. Stupid, stupid, STUPID… Mike spent the rest of the day keeping a careful eye out for angry football players with large wooden sticks. ---- Valentine’s Day was just around the corner, and Mike was getting sick of all of the ridiculous hoopla surrounding it. Yeah, Valentine’s Day was nice and all, but the way some of the girls just went on and on about it and giggled like insipid fifth graders whenever a guy simply walked past them was enough to make Mike wonder if they all had ever actually graduated from middle school. Plus, there was too much pressure about who to send Valentine’s chocolates to. The school had set up a booth in the cafeteria so people could send a little box of chocolates to their sweeties for a small fee, and absolutely everyone in Mike’s class was going nuts over it. Seriously, what was the big deal? They were all treating it like it was a life or death situation… “Ohmigod, are you going to get chocolates for Edward Cullen?” he overheard some girl giggle-whisper to her friend in the hallway. “What? No!” The other girl blushed furiously. “Like he’d even be interested…” “Oh, c’mon! As if he’ll even know it was you. And he’s so hot.” “Yeah, but --” “I’ll go with you to the booth, if it makes you feel better about it.” “Well… okay.” A smile spread across the girl’s face. “C’mon!” The both of them ran into the cafeteria, giggling their faces off. … Damn it. Damn those girls for giving him ideas. He was not sending chocolate to Edward Cullen. He wasn’t. No way. Never in a million years. That would just be the most embarrassing thing ever. His face was turning red at the mere thought of it. And of course, right at that moment Cullen was walking past him towards the cafeteria. Cullen shot him a dirty look before he went inside, door swinging shut behind him. Mike felt a stab of humiliation in his gut, although he didn’t know why. It wasn’t like Cullen could read minds or something; there was no possible way that he could know what Mike was (not) planning. Right? ---- It took him exactly twenty-four hours to finally get the nerve to send the chocolates (making his handwriting on the card as girly as possible in order to disguise his identity), and almost immediately after he had done it he wanted to go jump in a lake and drown himself for being so stupid. Why? Why had he done it? He was pretty sure that this was the most idiotic thing he had ever done in his life, including the time when he’d thought it would be a good idea to pull the fire alarm on his first day of school in second grade. Why was he so dumb? Cullen was going to find out it was him, and then he was gonna tell the whole school, and then -- “Hey, Mike Newton, right?” A senior that he recognized as being the quarterback on the football team was walking towards him. Mike froze in place. Oh, no. This was it, wasn’t it? He was going to die. He flinched in anticipation of the giant stick that would soon be making contact with his head -- “I think you left your cell phone in Coach Pasdar’s office,” the quarterback said, holding out Mike’s cell phone. “It had your name and picture and stuff in it.” “Oh -- thank you,” Mike mumbled, and quickly snatched the cell phone and ran away as fast as his feet could carry him. ---- The chocolates were delivered two days later on the dreaded Valentine’s Day during -- of course, during fourth period. Mike maintained a stoic face and refused to look anywhere except the board during the distribution of candy. Much to his surprise, he got four boxes of candy himself, which made him feel impressive. After the guy giving out the candy had left (Mike felt sorry for him, having to wear that ridiculous heart costume all day), he accidentally looked over at Cullen’s desk and saw it completely covered with tiny boxes of chocolate. Cullen looked decidedly pissed off, especially when he picked up one of them that was -- Oh, God. It was his box of chocolate. Mike felt his face go pale and his skin turn to weird, tingly ice as Cullen looked at the note and made a face. Then -- and this was the scary part, because how could he possibly know -- Cullen turned to Mike and gave him an accusatory look. “Can I talk to you after class?” Cullen asked, his voice quiet and cold. “Um… s-sure,” he stammered. He was definitely going to die now. Mike turned back to the front again and tried not to have a panic attack as he attempted to figure out an escape route. Maybe he could jump out of the window, suddenly, in the middle class -- unexpected! -- or maybe he could just make a run for it at the end, and then never come to school ever again, like maybe he could move to Canada or Hawaii, or possibly France -- But he never got the chance to implement any of his escape schemes, because Cullen had grabbed his arm as soon as the bell had rung (wow, he was a lot stronger than he looked), and yanked him out of his seat and into the hallway. “Listen,” Cullen said, whirling Mike around to face him, still clenching his arm. “I’m not interested. Okay?” “I… I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Mike said defiantly. Cullen rolled his eyes (which were a weird topaz color now -- did the guy wear color-changing contacts or something?). “I know you sent me a box. And I’m flattered, really,” (the look on his face suggested otherwise) “but I’m not into guys like that. I’m not into anyone like that. So, please, stop thinking about me that way.” “What --” But it was too late; Cullen had already let go of his arm and was walking down the hallway as though nothing had happened. God, he had never been so humiliated in his entire life. It was like Cullen had just thrown a bucket of ice water over his head and had just left him there, freezing and in shock. It was in that moment that Mike Newton decided that he hated Edward Cullen. ---- Two years later, when Bella Swan showed up, Mike was instantly enamored with her. It was one of the many instant attractions that he was sort of infamous for throughout the school. He followed her to class and helped her with her books and that sort of thing, and everyone thought it was “really cute”. Except for Bella. She seemed to be more interested in the enigma of Edward Cullen than him. Which was incredibly irritating, for a multitude of reasons. Still, he had never thought that Cullen would be interested in her. Cullen was never interested in anyone, except himself. Mike had been completely shocked when it became apparent that Bella and Cullen were a couple, and not only that, but he wasn’t entirely sure who, exactly, he was angry at -- Cullen or Bella. For he still had a miniscule crush on the asshole, try as he might to suppress it, and it was very difficult to suddenly be sitting at the same table as him and to suddenly have Cullen attempt to make some form of small talk with him, even though he clearly hated his guts -- and not even just the thing from freshman year, but because he also knew that Mike had a crush on Bella. It was pretty much the most awkward situation ever. But Mike was sure he could handle it -- after all, he was much more confident now than he had been freshman year, and was able to hang around the people he had feelings for without freaking out completely. And so far, Cullen was the only guy that Mike had ever found himself attracted to, so he was pretty sure he wasn’t entirely gay. Hell, maybe he wasn’t gay at all. Maybe he was completely straight except for Edward Cullen. After lunch one day, Cullen, Bella, and that Alice girl were getting ready to leave, when Mike suddenly said, “Hey, mind if I tag along?” The three of them looked surprised, and a little annoyed, but the Alice girl smiled and said, “Sure.” Mike had no idea what had caused him to suddenly ask to go with them to… wherever it is they went after lunch… but he had a sudden and unexplainable urge to walk with them. It was only after walking next to Cullen down the hallway for about a minute when he realized why he’d wanted to walk with them -- it was something that he’d been thinking about doing for a while, but he had kept pushing to the back of his mind. He guessed his subconscious was adamant on getting him to finally do it. Mike cleared his throat. “Um, Edward? Can I talk to you privately for a minute?” Cullen glanced sideways at him, a resolute expression on his face. “Okay,” he said, and let go of Bella’s hand. Bella looked distressed, but Alice gently grabbed her arm and led her down the hall. Mike raised an eyebrow at her behind her back. Couldn’t she be out of his presence for more than two seconds without flipping out completely? It was like they shared a lung or something. “What is it you want, Mike?” Cullen asked, a patient look on his face. “I just…” He gulped. He had to do this. “I just wanted to make sure… you’re not going to tell Bella about what happened freshman year, right?” God, it was so hard to say. His mouth felt so dry; it was like a desert in there. “No, of course not. Why would I do that? It’s hardly relevant…” Mike let out a huge sigh of relief. “And you haven’t told anyone else, right?” “No.” “Good. Thanks, I guess.” “Not a problem.” A pause. “Is there something else you wanted?” “No, not really…” He looked up at Cullen’s face, and a strange, overwhelming feeling possessed him when he looked up into that impossibly God-like visage, his practically luminous pale skin, and his eyes… He didn’t even know what he was doing before he was suddenly kissing him. Cullen shot backwards rather quickly, looking shocked and bewildered. “What -- ?” Mike’s mouth fell open. He felt numb -- everywhere -- oh God what had he just done? “I don’t -- I didn’t mean to -- huh?” “This never happened,” Cullen said angrily, his brows knitted together. “Do you understand?” “I -- yes --?” Mike said, but Cullen was already running down the hallway. It took Mike a few seconds to come to his senses, and that’s when the tidal waves of YOU ARE AN IDIOT came crashing down on him. He was sure his face was completely red, and he slid down to the floor, his head in hands. He looked around in panic; it was five minutes before lunch was over, so thankfully no one was in the hallway and thus no one had witnessed anything that had just happened. “Excuse me?” Mike froze. A figure emerged from behind one of the corners, looking more than a little taken aback. Mike slowly turned his head and saw -- It was the quarterback from his freshman year. The one who’d given him his cell phone… What the hell? “Didn’t you graduate?” Mike asked, forgetting, in his confusion, about the fact that he had just been caught kissing Edward Cullen. “Yeah, I’m visiting for a while -- did you just kiss Edward Cullen?” The quarterback stepped toward him tentatively, as though frightened of him. So. It really was true. He really was going to be beaten to death by a football player with a giant stick. He might as well go down with some vague shred of dignity. “Yeah, I did,” he said defensively. He stood up, fists clenched. “What’s it to you?” The quarterback stared at him for a few seconds, then suddenly grinned at him and said, “You lucky bastard.” Mike blinked. Wait, what was this now? “Huh?” he said. “You know, it’s been two years and I still haven’t forgotten about that guy,” the quarterback said, almost wistfully. “He looks exactly the same. Fucking hot as hell. How was it?” “I -- uh, don’t know…” He was completely confused. The football player was gay? And he was just openly admitting it? And a football player was gay? Mike looked at him; he didn’t look the slightest bit feminine -- he was masculine through and through, even in his movements and the way he talked. He didn’t even have a lisp! “How can you not know? You kissed him, didn’t you?” “I was… kind of in shock, really. I kinda did it out of nowhere. But…” He struggled to remember. “I think it was… cold. And hard. Like some kind of rock or something.” “Huh. Weird.” The quarterback shrugged and grinned again. “You’re still a lucky bastard, though. My hat is off to you! I would never have been able to do that while I was still in high school. You’re very brave.” “Thanks.” Mike smiled back. “Well, I gotta run, but see you later -- Mike Newton, right? Kid that lost his cell phone?” “Yep, that’s me.” “Well, good luck with everything, man.” The quarterback started walking down the hallway, when Mike called after him, “Hey, what’s your name?” “It’s Matt!” the quarterback yelled behind him. “Matt Spencer!” “Bye, Matt!” “Bye, Mike!” And Matt turned the corner and was gone. Mike smiled to himself as he stood alone in the hallway, his hands stuffed into his pockets. Maybe he wasn’t so weird after all. Maybe you didn’t have to be girly and feminine and odd when you liked guys. Maybe you just were who you were, and having a thing for some dudes was just one part of you, a part that didn’t have to do with anything else. He was still going to keep an eye out for football players with giant sticks, though. Or maybe just Edward Cullen with a giant stick. …It took him a couple moments to realize the innuendo in that sentence, and he burst out laughing. Well, if Cullen wanted to show Mike his giant stick, Mike wasn’t going to complain.

#fandom: twilight #ship: mike/edward

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