#some things I still can’t tell you

[highfunctioningflailgirl]

On days where RL clubs me with a sledgehammer, I reach for poetry. Oftentimes, there’s an uncanny correlation between my emotional state and whatever poem I randomly pick from whatever anthology I’m currently reading. Take today:

I’m sad for different reasons, but - Misha!! Thanks for smacking me in the face with this. Right in the feels…

#poetry #misha collins #some things I still can’t tell you #my reading

[shedontlovehuhself]

Today is officially the one year anniversary of Misha droping his New York Times best seller Some Things I Still Can't Tell You on the world.

Yes I made a post yesterday, but today's the official day.

#misha collins #some things i still can’t tell you #stiscty

[clairedelune-13]

There’s no way “Leg Wrestlers” isn’t about Jensen.

#leg wrestlers #misha collins #cockles #some things i still can’t tell you

[solargeist]

Can we pretty please get a Grian and Xelqua meet-up?? I love how you draw Xelqua and Grian and I just need to see what they would do if they meet......for science of course

wait hold on.. goes crazy .. I don’t have a design for Xelqua, that was just Grian earlier, but…. I think it’d go well

I think Xelqua is his patron, so he’d be excited to meet him !

but I was also playing with the idea that Little Grian here is a reincarnated version of Xelqua, but still looks up to him, prays to him, would want to be picked up and hugged by him, the safety of it. (How can he be reincarnated and still have a form here ? Well the divine can be a bit finicky)

#something something abt the first thing little grian says to Xelqua is did you hear me ? When I thanked you for the food ! #<- Aether showed him how to pray before meals #ask #my art #Xelqua #sketching #Late night doodle of them . Yawnssss #Also something something abt Grian being a reincarnated Xelqua and the two angels having to take care of him #he has no divine memory ! Maybe some vague feelings involving being scared of lightning and missing the ocean . But he’s just a little kid #that needs to be fed and kept out the weather and his back scratched so he’ll go to sleep #someone hold me back this is becoming a one shot au #Also Xelqua is 5’0/152cm still. Aether and Flora can’t tell if he’s another child when they see him 😭😭😭 #Grian and Xelqua meet and it’s like when Goten met Goku for the first time . Bursts into tears rn live

[simgerale]

me after attempting to get back into sims and realizing i had a lot more to do than play the game

#hi everyone #I’m going around hugging you all #okay now that we are gathered here today #i will simply acknowledge that i have been gone for a very long time and then also acknowledge that maybe it was for the best #i relied on sims to be my only creative activity even if i tried to write a book at the same time #and also. i prioritized sims over real life responsibilities. that’s just a deadly combination lol #but I recently noticed I just replaced sims with Netflix. with YouTube. with anything that gave me quick dopamine #literally became addicted in a sense. still am but I’ve been cut cold turkey from most everything #I get off work and go. okay I’ve done the dishes and the laundry……..I could read or write or bake…. #I try to write and sometimes i get a good hour #then I read for a few hours and then get tired of it #and I made cookies Tuesday so I’m waiting for those to be gone before baking again #I’m just so pitiful that I feel BORED and don’t know what to do #so I said….. okay what if I do sims for an hour. #I downloaded some new cc Tuesday and tried to play yesterday #y’all ……………….. I can’t find the energy anymore to set up elaborate scenes and pose my sims and plan posts #I said wow… this is boring without my intervention and fake story #I said wow…….. all this for what? for tumblr? yes I created cool things and provided joy. but is that inherintly important compared to my #own joy? my own everyday activities I should be doing? #y’all I do not leave the house unless we got out to eat or shop or travel to our parents #.. I have little desire to. I’m trying to find that desire #but my husband is busy with grad school and work and I don’t want to do anything by myself #I’ve found myself in one heck of a slump #I didn’t want to be human for awhile. just had no desires no interests no ambitions #I was slacking off SO HARD at work. I just had no drive to do well #I’m still working on it. I’m still trying to get caught up. I’m still trying to force myself to move every day. #but I am struggling y’all. and I can tell you that sims… sims isn’t helping rn but I want it to so bad. I want to get back into it #I didn’t mean to disappear on everyone. I got married and then life got busy and then I fell into this hole of nothing #I didn’t even WANT to crawl my way out. but my husband has helped a lot. I feel like such a child!!!! #I reached max tags. 🙃 bye love you all. till next time

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

I was rewatching The Stone Forest and I really like to think that Hilda had to pass by the Bell Keeper’s outpost on her way out of the city limits. I like to think that idiot looked at what was happening, shrugged, and said ‘eh, she’s the scariest thing out there’

#“‘the scariest thing out there’?”the girl sends him a look that isn't quite a glare for once; it still conveys her opinion just as clearly #Edmund shrugs. Hilda is still within sight of his binoculars. he watches her run and can’t be sure whether she’s running *towards* or *from #*.He doesn’t think she knows either. #'I mean. it’s not like trolls can harm her at this time of the day. #Don’t tell me you believe in fairies kid.' #And there it is at last: the glare. Meiri looks up from her art project - her new therapist had reccomended it as a way to express herself #and since he'd been helping so much so far she'd decided to grudgingly give it a shot - #“*No*” she states pointedly; to anyone who knew her it was an affirmation. And Edmund knew her better than she cared for #'What I believe in is wolves and recluse spiders and ticks and nettle. And I believe that someone with the spine #to sabotage the Patrol wouldn't have the self control to not lick a pretty mushroom' #“Hey!” Edmund protested putting down his binoculars. “I sabotaged the Patrol! For *you* I might add!” #Meiri's smile turned mean; it was a regular expression for her yet it never conveyed any malice. Just the thrill of a game that never tired #her. “And would you?” she lifted one thick eyebrow; signaling to her dad that it was his move now #The dad in question was unfortunately thinking back to a time in his young teenage years when he figured he could eat anything animals bit #and gave himself a poisoning that had him taken to the ER. But she didn't need to know that. *ever* in fact. #“Obviously I would. Like I'd let a mushroom ruin my perfect sandwich diet” #Meiri groaned loudly. Some games were worth playing. But some wars she'd already accepted she'd never win #“Anyway” he turned back to staring at the outside of the wall as if it was of any interest to him (it wasn't) #“kid'll be fine is my point. And even if she isn't ya know what's the best think about this situation?” #They looked at each other with matching smirks. “none of our flipping business” he said at the same time as she echoed #“None of our fucking business” #He gasped immediatelly. “*Meiri!*” #The chastening was useless. She just shrugged innocently. #He'd really have to limit her library visits #the bell keeper hilda #meirdom #hilda the series #hilda netflix

[blueberryspyder]

I know my blog doesn’t have like, any followers, but I wanna make it clear that transmisogynists are not welcome here. I also know for a fact I have some people I need to unfollow for being transmisogynists. The last few months I’ve been very, very confused by wtf “transandrophobia” was, and I had only ever seen the “good” side of it, and never the side of it being used to actively hurt trans women. I’ll admit I’m still confused on certain things, but I’m not above admitting that I might be wrong and I’m willing to learn, so thank you for your patience.

To any trans women/trans fems who follow me: I support you, and I want you to feel safe here.

Edit: I’m retracting the bit about transandrophobia, since some of y’all have been really kind (genuinely) and helped explain the theory to me (as well as the antisemitism behind the “truther” term, which I apologize for).

To any fellow trans men/trans mascs that follow me: I want you to ALSO feel safe here. Even if my original message came from a good place, it was still worded poorly and painted us in a bad light. I won’t delete this post cause I don’t want to hide from my misconceptions and help others like me who are confused, and because I want to stand behind the message that transphobia of any kind is NOT welcome here. Thank you 😊

#captain's log #wanted to make it clear #since I’ve been very in the dark about what transandrophobia stood for #I never fully believed in it but I did agree with some of their comments #I saw there was… antagonistic energy towards the group to say the least #and the way they would respond put me off #so I sat outside of it and looked at it through a critical lens before diving in #and then I saw that one anon message and went ‘ah okay’ #remember: you are not immune to propaganda/cult like mentality #I’m grateful I’ve learned to be critical about what others tell me #and to look into things before I take a stance #and I can’t beat myself up for that because I thought it was just a blog dedicated to trans men! and I’m trans masc! #but after learning about it I started looking at what they were really saying and I didn’t. like a lot of what I saw #but I still saw things that I agreed with #so I was confused #it feels hard to ask about it yknow? especially since I was only seeing the ‘hate’ from people who didn’t believe it existed #so I’m really glad I found that long post from earlier it really shed some light for me

[starlooove]

No bc fuck tim but it really really bothers me how people ignore his growth like he used to be an asshole and I’ll give tim Stans one thing: now he’s so so so stale but what I disagree with is that this staleness is bc nobody likes him like it’s in fact the exact opposite where everyone likes him so much they dont want to do anything. Even when it’s him surface level challenging Bruce it’s when everyone else is doing it too; but he’s still the backbone of the fam! Etc. and it’s so irritating bc him gaining more compassion and empathy even for people he doesn’t fw is so fun to watch and that’s why the captain boomerang thing was so out of character! (Not in a from the author way but in a tim wouldn’t do that and he and Bruce both knew it which is why it went down like it did. Same way dick killing joker was ooc; not in fanon sense but in a he would hate himself forever for this sense) and speaking of that it’s such an interesting mirror to Bruce who genuinely believes that everyone can grow vs Tim’s it doesn’t matter if they grow it’s not my decision to make like it’s the same but it’s not AND WITH CASS’ IT DOESNT MATTER IF THEY CHOOSE NOT TO GROW I WONT DO IT! like ugh. And anyways even when people acknowledge it they boil it down to “Janet and Jack taught him that the capitalist pigs that they are” like no. This is who tim was. Tim was the kind of guy who’d blame a dead kid for dying. That’s ok. Also Janet and Jack? Please reread anything involving them that’s not a fic like Jack had anger issues and they were both aloof at worst like relax.

#the Jack and Janet thing is both an understatement and an exaggeration but I don’t think anyone reads enough to care #some tim stan might get all pissy and be like ‘no look this is everytime jack yelled at him and boarding schools are abusive’ to which #and its like narratively that means nothing bc the tim you made up to justify the Drake parents you made up by blowing shit out of #proportion is also made up and if all of that was abusive there’d be smth to show for it besides ur homophobic Jack #too girlboss to care but still terrible Janet bc god forbid a woman have a personality from ur fics #anyways that’s also the reason I’m ignoring the council of spiders #well two reasons #first is that was just a moment to make tim look cool and did absolutely nothing for him or his character moving on #like at all #I’d say it fucked with his previous established dislike of killing for his own reasons #and while that COULD be interesting it’s not bc they didn’t do shit with it #and fanon doesn’t do fun shit with it either #nothing about how tim in his most manic state did shit he doesn’t want to remember shit he’d HATE other ppl for #just “’remember what I did to ur base Ra’s? mess with me again and see what I do next 😼’ #like ok can you be real and genuine? #anyways I think #AND NOT IN A HATER WAY #Tim would benefit from being humbled #like genuinely I detest the world can’t move without tim running it but the idea that tim thinks that way is so good to me #and #I think next step being him realizing that’s not true would be a BIG push for his character #bc like I said tim Stans are right in the fact that he’s stale as hell rn #but that’s bc there’s nothing to say bc there’s nowhere to go! y’all want a tim action story where he shows off how badass he is reread #the Bruce quest and maybe it’ll remind you he’s not ceo lmao but anyways there’s nothing internal to say about him atp bc nobody wants to #say anything that’s not propping him up. same with Bruce! Gotham war was such a copout but it’s like ppl are saying he’s stale and it’s bc #god forbid he makes a lasting fumble. and I’m not under the illusion this is new I’m just saying it’s weird that fandoms not clocking it #anywayyys I really do like thinking about the No killing rule and how different it manifests for each perosn #like the way each distinct difference tells u so much about them #UGH ONLY SLIGHTLY RELATED BUT DUUUUUKE BEING LIKE IDGAF ABOUT GUNS LIKE UR SO REAAAL #anyways enough tim positivity for today FUCK THAT NIGGA!

[clairedelune-13]

Sorry, but “Men In Woods” was not written by a heterosexual man.

#misha collins #men in woods #some things i still can’t tell you

[itspileofgoodthings]

The moment in Stardust when Tristan walks into the witch’s lair and Yvaine who thought he didn’t care about her at all lights up while still chained to the sacrificial table of death

#stardust #at the very end of the day the thing that gets me the most about stardust is that she literally glows when she’s happy and you can see it #it’s so me-coded #can’t hide when you like someone can’t #hide when you’re sad #and the light comes and goes as you move about your day #also ??? like?????!!? the story just lets Yvaine love Tristan first and in some ways most #it’s not unrequited it’s not unreturned and so it’s satisfying #but he sets out on his stupid little quest and it’s not just about him realizing that it’s Her not Victoria #it’s also Yvaine learning human love up close after loving it so much from afar #she tells him first!!!! she chooses first!!!!!!!!!! #her generous beautiful noble heart #(I really love her) #anyway my least favorite thing about stardust is the occasional moments of 7th grade boy humor (the princess bride would never) #but still #Tristan coming in to save her. the two of them protecting each other from the smashing mirrors. Yvaine putting her arms around him and jusT #GLOWING #and that being the highest emotional payoff and the thing that saves everybody #like. 14 year old me saw this movie and was CHANGED #because her happiness and love is something so bright it can destroy evil #and that’s what her shining IS #idk it’s just such a perfect fairy tale quality #no Star can shine with a broken heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #also when Tristan tells Victoria he found the star and quietly says yes when she asks if it’s beautiful #and then opens the handkerchief and realizes she can’t cross the wall #and then SPRINTS #to stop her #now I’m just listing random stardust moments #while we’re at it Michelle Pfeiffer is absolutely terrifying and incredible as the witch

[hotcheetohatredwastaken]

Just sat through an hour of my great aunt saying that I remind her of both that blond chick on Risoli and Isle and that lead female protagonist from Bones, am I sure I shouldn’t be studying to be a mortician instead of a chemist? Just since I’m smart but seem not to have any empathy and all 💀

So anyways how is y’all’s Christmas going so far

#gotta be honest #still have no idea what she meant #I mean slay queens #but like #A #not a super realistic job I don’t think #well maybe idk #can’t say homocide and dead people are my things #B #I just don’t know if this was meant to be a compliment or not #I asked for an example of the no empathy thing #and she just said #“well in some situations you have it and others you don’t. #so still no concrete answer there #ma’am please tell me about myself #why am I a murder mystery show protagonist to you

[onedirecton]

Guys….I’m gonna start looking around for a new job

#just had a big fat cry lmao #my sister made a good point I’m feeling so out of it because my body and mind sre telling me to follow a different path #like I know I am meant for more and I just need to take action #my home life is still bothering me but I just need. detach you know. and not let the small things get to me cuz I can’t control it #and I need to tackle one problem and one major task at a time #and i think I #will look into getting a few passes to so #some gym classes for enrichment lol and for stress relief

[padawansuggest]

.

#I had to send some messages to my local ss office #telling them my specific disabilities and how it keeps me from even applying yo jobs #because colorado did a new thing recently where they want proof ur at least applying or exempt from working #or they cut off food stamps after 3 months #which is fair I guess just prove you apply and try and you keep them #but I had to write out a bunch of reasons my diagnoses keep me from working #which is also okay that was easy enough #but I still can’t get actual disability lmao they denied me #idk maybe I need one of the SS office lawyers to file it for me maybe i did it wrong lol #either way it’s wild that all I have to do is tell them why I can’t even leave the house much #and they give me my benefits back but applying for actual disability is such a freaking hassle #putting this in tags cause I feel it’s quieter

[cuntylittlesalmon]

i’m finding it really hard to take more media discourse seriously right now because a lot of it tends to be hinder by emotional fragility. the “if something make me feel this type of way (namely the escapist, or the horny) it is inherently above criticism, and any attempts to critique (even if said critique is coming from a place of endearment) is an attack on my morality” stuff.

#esp when it relies on misogyny…….. #like attempting to create a new category of fiction is fine #it happens all the time. but when people tell you that creating That Specific Subgenre is futile & a defanging of the baked-in nature of #The Genre and you hit back with ‘but it’s WOMEN’S fiction!!!’ that is just misogyny #and the original critique was not commentary on your moral politics #however #you’re reaction is now that you have made it such #anyway. i saw a thread on ‘cozy horror’ and i wanted to scream #you are just describing GOTHIC. you are describing DOMESTIC. #these are things that already exist. and attempting to craft something new (and fucking vague as hell) out of it #on the basis of it being ‘by women for women’ (as comforting fiction should inherently be. no terrible bitchy women here no sir! /s) #is fucking futile. and misogynistic. #and this is coming from someone who regularly enjoys romance novels #i UNDERSTAND the desire for soft and escapist fiction #however when people find the politics in them & the discourses surrounding lacking….you can’t get in your feels about it #a lot of this reminds me of the rwrb discourse. it’s the poster child for escapist fiction. it also has some of the most milquetoast #liberalized politics. #like in your escapist fiction palestine is still being violently colonized? AND your find that jokes about that are acceptable? #before cmq removed the line there were tons and tons of these ‘escapist fiction’ readers in their feelings about being told that their book #baby had piss poor politics. are you incapable of seeing flaws in your favorite pieces of fiction? #i’m positive i could pull this into the fandomization of media consumption + the idea of media as identity but it’s dinner time #and i’m hungry :) #anw. sorry the tag essay for anyone who got this far 💀 #i have chronic can’t shut up disease #i would normally rant to my gf but she’s napping 🥺 and i don’t want to disturb her rn