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cookinguptales · 10 months

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I just keep thinking about the way that Silvia and Nandor mirrored each other in this episode. Both of them represented Guillermo's two families and how he's really failing them both.

Both Silvia and Nandor love Guillermo and know him well enough to know that something's up. They both know that he's distracted and self-involved and absent -- and won't tell them why. And it's hurting them both.

They're both starting to get angry.

Silvia and Nandor both get pieces of Guillermo that the other doesn't, and both treat him very differently, but... they're both very similar in this episode.

Like, Silvia rarely sees her son. He barely took any time to see her for thirteen years, even though they lived in the same city for most of it, and has missed at least three birthdays in a row. Then he suddenly starts wanting to repair their relationship. He's not just showing up at her house every so often or crashing on her couch in a depression for a week without telling her why. Now he's actively trying to be with her. Be there for her. He's giving her lavish gifts and making time to visit with her.

But even before that, she still loved him. She still supported him. Even now, she's happy for any scrap of attention he gives her. But... she's finally losing her patience with him in 5.05, and you can understand why. She's finally got him there at her birthday physically, but mentally he's not there at all. He's constantly on the phone, constantly ignoring her, didn't even bring a token gift. He keeps trying to make this night about him.

And her Guillermo has always been distant, has never been entirely honest with her about his life -- but he's never been cruel or selfish towards her.

Until now. So for the first time, he's truly disappointed her.

Then, on the other hand, we have Nandor. Nandor has always had all of Guillermo's time, but he's only started to have the emotional intimacy that Guillermo's shared with Silvia very recently. He's become addicted to it very quickly, though. He doesn't just enjoy Guillermo's attention; he's addicted to it. And he's come to really depend on him. He's become used to Guillermo being there for him, protecting him, hyping him up, getting him out of trouble. Loving him.

And now, like Silvia, he's coming to realize that his Guillermo is pulling away. And like Silvia, he doesn't know why. Silvia doesn't know that he became a vampire familiar 13 years ago, and Nandor doesn't know that he's been bitten by a vampire now.

Nandor has sort of been downgraded to where Silvia was for most of the series, hasn't he? He had all of this love and attention from Guillermo, and then he was very abruptly ghosted without any straight answer why.

But he's not like Silvia. He's not gentle and understanding and long-suffering. Nandor, like Guillermo, is fairly selfish. So while Silvia is only becoming disappointed with Guillermo now, Nandor's speedrunning it. lmao

Guillermo betrayed his biological family with his physical and emotional absence, but this episode showed that he's starting to do that to the vampires, too. And while we may laugh at the vampires' antics and it's harder to feel bad for them when Guillermo isn't there to clean up their messes, we understand keenly how badly Guillermo hurt his family by messing up his mother's birthday.

By the end of the episode, though, it's made really clear that to Nandor, the two feel like one and the same. It was an important event in his life and Guillermo, who promised to always be there for him when he needed him, was not. And he was deeply, deeply disappointed.

Compare Nandor's reaction here to his reaction in s2 with The Curse. (I could write an entire meta post just comparing those two episodes, lmao.) He would have liked Guillermo's help in The Curse and seemed a little cross that Guillermo was off "having fun" at a concert or something (read: killing vampires) but he was largely okay with figuring things out himself.

In Local News, though, he was constantly reaching out for his right hand, who was no longer there. Guillermo has become something reliable and depended on and necessary to Nandor -- and he's not here. While it irritated Nandor in The Curse, it seemed to actively hurt him in Local News. He felt betrayed by Guillermo's absence, just like Silvia did.

For both of them, though, it's not actually about physical distance. (Though that obviously bothers them, too.) It's about the emotional distance that Guillermo is putting between them. Guillermo might physically have come to Silvia's birthday, but he was emotionally a thousand miles away. Guillermo's physical absence was felt by Nandor, but it was that he wasn't there to depend upon emotionally that really seemed to fuck him up.

(Even though Nadja and Laszlo disagreed on methods, they both comforted and supported each other in a really scary time here. Nandor kept reaching out for that from Guillermo, but never got it. Ouch.)

So both Silvia and Nandor are getting this sense that they're not really important to Guillermo anymore, and that's killing them. Both of them are feeling abandoned -- and for Nandor in particular, who has several hundred years of abandonment issues, that's devastating.

Guillermo, for his part, doesn't seem to realize how much his actions are driving them both away. He's trying to have it all, but he's on the fast track to having nothing. He won't be a full vampire, he won't be a full slayer, he won't have his biological family, he won't have his vampiric family. He'll be all alone, and he'll have no one to blame but himself.

The vampires didn't make him forget his mother's birthday. The slayers didn't prevent him from helping the vampires. Guillermo is just prioritizing his own hopes, fears, and desires, and he's alienating everyone.

It's good to prioritize yourself sometimes, especially when you're a person like Guillermo who's always suppressed his own desires so he could fulfill others', but it's almost like he's swinging too far the other way now. He's letting down the people who depend on him, and he's hurting their feelings in ways that will be very hard to fix.

Guillermo has, up until now, been a very dependable person. Guillermo's mother couldn't depend on his presence, but she could depend on his love and care and kindness. Nandor couldn't depend on his openness, but he could depend on his presence and unconditional support.

But he's not dependable anymore, is he? And that really seems to have thrown both of them. They don't know what to make of this new Guillermo, but they don't like it.

They're both so, so disappointed in him.

And I think Guillermo is, too. : /

#tbh I could write an entire meta just about how this is tying into nandor's deep-seated fear of guillermo leaving him #which is worsened by the abandonment issues he's had since he was alive #but this one is already pretty long #wwdits #wwdits spoilers #wwdits meta #guillermo de la cruz

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mothguillotine · 7 months

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Hey Siri, Can Vampires Get Cucked?

"So it didn't go as well as I had hoped it would," you tell the camera thinking about the fact that Oscar ran away from you a week ago, "I was really hoping that I would be able to get Oscar to understand but now I'm realizing that it's possible that hypnosis was probably a better option and that knocking him out and kidnapping him was aggressive."

"The one good thing about the whole situation is that Nandor has finally started to warm up to me," you say, "he has actually spoken to me everyday. Actually I wouldn't say warming up to me is the correct term. I honestly have no idea what changed after Oscar left the other day." When you finish up your interview with the crew you return to your bedroom to do some reading.

Down stairs though Nadja is sat in front of the camera. She looks exasperated and when she speaks its present in her voice as well.

"I have been trying to get Nandor to grow some balls and ask her out but I have yet to have any success," she tells the camera, "I have watched Nandor follow her around for the last two weeks like a lost little puppy. I am sick of it."

"So I have devised a plan to get him to admit that he wants her," she says deviously, "Both of them have yet to truly talk and this will fix that. Of course Laszlo has a different approach."

"My idea is to shove them both in a room until something is either sucked, fucked, or cucked." Laszlo says as he sits down next to his wife.

"Cucked?" Nadja asks, "Why would this end up in cuck?"

"I mean you never know what could happen in there." Laszlo says looking suggestively into the camera while Nadja makes a face behind him.

"Well, we decided to mix our ideas together," Nadja says, moving the conversation forward, "We will lock them in a room together until Nandor confesses."

"Yes, and if it results in someone getting sucked, fucked, or cuck-" Laszlo starts to say until Nadja cuts him off.

"Laszlo!" Nadja yells at her husband, "This is about Nandor and his feelings. Not about you."

"Yes, I'm sorry my love," Laszlo apologizes to her but when they go to leave he turns back to the camera when Nadja is out of earshot and says, "If it results in anything sexual I will be a most willing participant."

_________________________________________

A little while later while you are reading you hear your name being called by Nadja.

"Nadja?" you call out.

"In here!" she yells. When you find her she is in Nandor's bedroom.

"Hey, what's up?" you ask her, " and why are we in Nandor's room?"

"One second sweetie," she says to you, "I will be right back."

You sit down on the chair in front of Nandor's coffin and for about ten minutes you wait until you hear someone in the hall outside the door. The door is quickly opened and Nandor is shoved in. As fast as the door opens its closed the next second and when Nandor rushes to open the door it doesn't budge.

"Laszlo!" he yells, "Open this door right now!"

When he doesn't get a response he starts yelling for Guillermo. You can hear nothing through the door though.

"Nandor?" you ask, "What's going on?"

Nandor turns around to look at you and immediately starts banging on the door again yelling for Laszlo to let him out.

"Just get it over with then I will let you out!" Laszlo yells through the door.

Nandor knew exactly what he was talking about. A few days ago Nandor had confided in Laszlo about how he found you beautiful and how badly he wanted you. In all honesty it reminded Laszlo of himself falling in love with Nadja. That's why he had forced this confrontation.

You on the other hand had no idea about what any of this meant. While you definitely didn't mind being trapped in Nandor's room with him you were confused. A few days ago Nadja had confronted you about what you felt towards Nandor and in all honesty since he started talking to you, you have developed a bit of a crush on him.

Nadja had pressed and pressed until you had admitted it to her and you made her swear not to tell anyone, which, to your knowledge she had kept. What you and Nandor don't know is that they had been conspiring to get their friends together.

"So, uh what was that all about?" you ask Nandor.

"You know Laszlo, he is my best friend but he is not the smartest." he says and laughs awkwardly.

"Nandor, what did he mean to get it over with?" you ask, you are honestly a bit worried that Nadja had told Laszlo and in turn he had told Nandor that you like him.

"Nothing," Nandor says, "He meant absolutely nothing."

"Nandor, whatever it is you can tell me." you tell him, Nandor turns from the door and faces you.

"I- its nothing." he tells you.

"Well it's obviously something or else we wouldn't be locked in here." you tell him.

"It's nothing," Nandor insists, "stop doing that."

"Stop doing what?" you ask him.

"Looking at me like that," he says frustratedly, "I can't deal with it."

"Okay, I am very lost." you tell him, "How am I looking at you?"

"You- nevermind," Nandor says, returning to banging on the door.

"Nandor!" you yell at him and when he doesn't turn to face you, you march forward and turn him around to face you, "Tell me."

You both stand still, this is the closest to him you've been since the first time you met. He looks down at you and a split second later he is kissing you. It surprises you for a second but once you get into it you are kissing him back, the kiss is sweet and short. When you both finally break apart you can't help but smile.

"Is that it?" you ask him.

"What?" Nandor asks, still a bit out of it.

"You just wanted to kiss me?" you ask, "That's it?"

"Well I wouldn't say I just wanted to kiss you but yes." Nandor says looking down at you.

"Do you wanna do it again?" you ask him and before you know it you are kissing again, this time though more passionately than before. His hands find your waist and you bring one of your hands up to his face. You both break away for a moment then resume your activities. One of Nandor's hands is making their way up the back of your shirt.

"Do you wanna-" You start to ask Nandor.

"Yes," He tells you.

"You don't even know what I was going to say?" you tell him smiling.

"Whatever it is. I want to do it." he tells you.

"Really?" you ask him, "Just like that?"

"Just like what?" he asks you confused.

"Nevermind, I was just gonna ask if-" You start to say but are interrupted by Laszlo.

"Nadja is starting to get what the humans refer to as 'hangry'," Laszlo says through the door, "We must leave now or she will become violent."

"Okay, Laszlo we will be right there." Nandor says, "I shall talk with you later, my sunshine."

_________________________________________

You are currently sitting down in front of the camera and honestly you have no idea what to say. Oscar hasn't returned any of your texts or calls and the whole situation with Nandor you still haven't talked about with him yet.

"The last week has been pretty crazy," you finally started, "I mean I don't even honestly know where to start but I'm starting to get the hang of the vampire thing. I hypnotized for the first time yesterday night, some security guard stumbled across us while we fed."

After you and Nandor had been freed from his room you had both been unable to speak with each other about what happened. As soon as you had left Nadja stole you to make sure you looked fabulous for your first official hunt. For the last two weeks Guillermo had brought you humans to feed on and now you were actually going to attempt to get one for yourself.

"We decided to go out by the bars and get any drunks who we stumbled upon," you tell the camera, "I wasn't told though that if you drink the blood of someone who is intoxicated that you also feel the effects. When I was still alive I was notorious at being a lightweight. Unfortunately, that carried over to my vampire life. If I was still able to be bruised my legs would definitely be covered in them."

You could honestly barely remember the night prior after you had all drank two humans. The security guard had happened early enough where you could remember it but a lot is missing.

Nadja and Laszlo had yet to leave their room and you haven't seen Nandor either. You were anxious that you may have come on too strong but you also knew that he did feel the same way. So it just honestly confused you. When you are dismissed by the crew you head to your bedroom.

Down the hall Nandor had tried on most of his clothes and still had not found the perfect outfit. Guillermo had been helping him try on and rate different outfits but after Nandor had tried on the same shirt and 3 slightly different pairs of pants he resigned himself to waiting till his master was ready.

"I honestly have no idea what is going on with him." Guillermo whispers into the camera.

"Ta-Da!" Nador says and Guillermo turns to look at him, "What do you think?"

"Wonderful Master," Guillermo says as Nandor spins to give him a 360° of the outfit, Guillermo turns to face the camera again and with a straight face says, "that is the very first outfit he tried on."

_________________________________________

You, apparently in your drunkness, had repeatedly texted Oscar apologizing over and over. It definitely wasn't the most embarrassing thing you have ever done while intoxicated, but it is definitely up there. For a while you lay on your bed staring up at the ceiling until you hear a knock at your door.

Nandor is standing there when you open the door with a bouquet of flowers. If you weren't confused before you are definitely confused now.

"What is this for?" you ask him and take the flowers from his hands.

"Well I read that bringing flowers to a potential mate is a good gift so I made Guillermo get you some," he tells you, "I hope you like them."

"Oh, Nandor, this is very sweet," you tell him, "Thank you."

"Oh it's nothing," he tells you, "I hope you like them."

"You asked me that already." you tell him smiling.

"Oh, well, bye." Nandor says quickly and leaves. You watch him walk down the hall and look back at the crew, confused, who is filming from the other way.

_________________________________________

"I have put a plan into motion," Nandor says to the camera, "mostly to get Laszlo off my back about my 'feelings' but I believe I have finally found the vampire I want to spend my life with."

You have been getting gifts from Nandor everyday for the past two weeks. At first it started off with simple gifts that anyone could find at a store but then it became more outrageous.

Three days ago he presented you with a gorgeous necklace and the next day he gave you a pair of earrings. Both days you had told him that you didn't need gifts from him but he had insisted.

In all honesty it was uncomfortable to accept the gifts he gave you, mostly because you had no way of getting him anything of the same standard. You loved that he apparently wanted to buy you presents but at some point it had to stop.

Today, as you expected, was no different. Except this time he brought you a bigger box than you had ever gotten before. It was about the same size as a small trunk and when you opened it you found a gorgeous dress, not too dissimilar from one of Nadjas.

"What is this?" you ask him while picking up the dress gently.

"I bought you a dress," he tells you, "I had Guillermo set it all up. He made sure the dress was the right size."

"Nandor, I don't know what to say," you tell him, "Thank you but I don't think I can expect this."

"Why not?" he asks you, "Do you not like the color?"

"No it's gorgeous but I-," you stop and think, "Nandor I really love all the gifts but you can't keep spending money on me."

"Why not?" Nandor asks and he looks kind of offended.

"Because you can't keep spending money on me." you tell him, "Honestly I really do love the gifts but you don't have to do that to impress me."

"I just like giving you things," he says, "seeing you happy makes me happy."

"If you want me to be happy then why don't we spend more time together?" you ask him.

"What would we do?" Nador asks you.

"Whatever we want. We could watch a movie or we could go read or something else. I don't know, whatever you want to do." you tell him.

"Can I kiss you?" he asks and you smile.

"If you want to," you tell him and he goes for it.

His hands find your face right away and you sink even deeper into the kiss. Your hand finds its way into his hair. When you both pull away you realize that you are still standing in your doorway.

"Do you want to come in?" you ask him.

"Yes." Nandor says simply.

When you drag him in the room you slam the door in the faces of the camera crew. As soon as he's in your room you resume kissing again.

This time though it's different, you both know what's coming. His hands start at your waist but slowly make their way up and under your shirt.

"Do you want me to take it off?" you ask him and instead of answering you he just rips it off. As soon as your bra is on full display he gets distracted by kissing your newly accessible skin.

"Nandor?" you ask him, "Do you want me?"

"More than anything, my sunshine." he answers you and the way he looks at you makes you want to melt.

You return to kissing each other and he picks you up to bring you over to your bed. When he sets you down you realize how much more clothing he is wearing compared to you.

"You are wearing too many clothes," you tell him and watch as he takes off the intricate top. When he is done you pull him down on the bed and kiss him again. Nandor goes straight to your bra hooks and takes it off. He pulls away to pay attention to your breasts.

"You are beautiful," he tells you and then kisses down your neck and chest til he gets to your tits. He pushes you down against your bed and starts sucking on your nipple.

"You are really good at this," you tell him and when he switches to the other side, "fuck."

"I have been a vampire since long before this country was found," he tells you.

"So what you are saying is that you have been around the block?" you tease him.

"The block?" he asks you, "I have flown around it."

"It means- you know what nevermind," you tell him, "more important things at hand than this."

You grab the back of his head and bring him down to kiss you. One of his hands starts playing with the hem of your pants while the other cups your left tit. You get the hint and lift yourself up to take off your pants, but before you can move to get them off Nandor does. He takes not just your jeans off but your underwear as well.

Then he dives in and licks along your folds. The shock of him on you has you pulling away until he wraps his arms around your legs and pulls you impossibly closer. Your hands find his hair and you wrap your fingers in it and when you look down at Nandor he starts to suck on your clit.

"fuck," you moan, "don't stop."

Nandor looks at you with his eyes and removes one of his arms from your legs. You suddenly feel two of Nandor's fingers pressing into you. You throw your head back against the bed and moan loudly. When he speeds up his actions you know it's only a matter of time until you come.

"fuck, Nan-nandor, I'm gonna-," you tell him until you feel a third finger inside you and you know it's over.

A wave of spasms run over you and you feel yourself grow wetter than before. Nandor continues to ravish you through your orgasm which makes it really hard to stop a second one from building.

"Nandor," you beg, "fuck me please."

He removes himself from you for a second and says "One more." then he continues to work you towards your second orgasm. This one comes quicker than the one before but it is just as intense. Nandor removes his fingers from you and lips them clean.

When he kisses you you can taste yourself on his tongue. You start trying to pull off his pants and when he stands up off the bed to do so you are greeted with his erect dick.

Around the house you had of course heard all about how he had a massive penis but it still surprised you to know that he was even bigger than you thought. You move to lick the pre-cum of the tip but when you do he moves away.

"Later," he tells you, "I want to fuck you first." He drags your hips to the edge of your bed and looks at you.

You nod and pull him in to kiss you. When your lips meet he starts into you. While he pushes into you the reason he wanted to have you ready becomes obvious, he is massive. Once he is fully seated inside of you he waits a moment. When he pulls away from your lips and starts moving. Slowly.

For a bit you appreciate that he is trying to make sure that you are comfortable but you want him to move.

"Nandor, faster," you tell him, "please."

"Whatever you want my sunshine." he tells you and starts to move faster than before.

You can't help but let out a moan especially when he starts to go even faster. When let out an especially loud one he groans. You start to feel an orgasm approach when Nandors fingers find your clit. He continues to pound into you and move his fingers over the sensitive bundle of nerves.

"Nandor!" you yell when you hit your breaking point and dig your nails into his biceps.

Nandors thirsts become more and more sloppy and you know he is close. You can feel yourself pulsing around him and soon enough he spills into you. When he is done he collapses atop you.

You both lay like this for a minute until you feel Nandor go to move out of you. When he does you feel the mess gather between your legs. He goes to grab a tissue from your nightstand and cleans you up.

After he throws it away he picks you up and moves you to lay on the bed properly. It surprises you for a second but let him do it. He moves to the other side of the bed and joins you in laying down.

His arm snakes around you and pulls you closer to him. You melt into him and feel yourself start to drift off.

Masterlist

#nandor the relentless #nandor the relentless x reader #wwdits nandor #what we do in the shadows #wwdits #nandor the relentless smut #smut #female reader

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mulderscully · 2 years

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*disclaimer: i wrote this based on the leaks and am publishing it after the episode airs because i have been dying to talk about it. some stuff could have been lost or confused in translation.

something to be said about nandor confusing guillermo's boyfriend as his best friend and being jealous of that because we know nandor sees guillermo as his best friend, then him deciding he needs to turn marwa into freddie in order to be happy. maybe because he sees that guillermo was happy and thought if he duplicated it it would make him happy too, without fully grasping how many boundaries he has crossed. he has so much love for guillermo and he genuinely has no idea how to deal with it or where to place it.

he puts marwa/freddie on the trip to see the world, which was what he wanted, and what he wanted with guillermo and it's so clear how badly what he lost in that trip haunts him and i think he doesn't understand why it didn't affect guillermo the same way. why guillermo was able to find happiness with someone else while he just became more miserable. him being so emotional sending marwa/freddie away is really interesting because we know he and marwa did not have any real connection, he did not care about her. he also did not know freddie. that emotion is about nandor and his continued sense of emptiness and longing for something he cannot allow himself to admit, which is how bad he wanted that trip with guillermo and wants guillermo in general. he can't have guillermo because he can't admit this, so he wants the person closest to guillermo. he wants guillermo all for himself, but he cannot verbalize that because that means actually understanding himself and being vulnerable - and in his actions to avoid his feelings he keeps pushing guillermo further away.

i think guillermo still loves nandor, he has loved him almost half his life and that doesn't just go away - but i think that this season at the beginning was about starting to truly break the familiar/master relationship and have them be friends and equals, but as the season went on they fell back into old habits and there needed to be this final straw to make guillermo be fully fed up and set up for season five, where i am guessing nandor will actually have to do a shitton of self reflection and growth and groveling. i kinda expected that to happen this season, but it is hard to fit that into 10 23 min long episodes.

what's interesting is that, i don't feel like guillermo is distraught at losing freddie per se, he barely mentiond him all season, but more upset that nandor still doesn't respect him the way he should and that has led to the end of the one thing in 13 years that was 100% his. but i feel like guillermo's true feelings are hard gage for me because they've really had him be distant with his emotions in terms of like.... everything.

but i think it all just comes down to nandor thinking he is showing guillermo love by NOT turning him because he thinks being a vampire is a curse and guillermo thinking nandor doesn't love or respect him because he won't turn him yet still wants to keep him all to himself, not understanding that nandor feels like if he turns guillermo then guillermo will leave for good because he got all he wanted from nandor.

i don't know really think nandor's actions this season are excusable per se, esp this episide, but i do think they are understandable. not only is nandor a vampire, he is also stupid (canon) and he is also deeply mentally ill. he has made a lot of progress but the fact that he has all these hidden desires and this quest for perfection that he thinks he can reach with wishes and magic, make him backslide and hurt the one he loves most. and he is going to have to face true accountability for everything that has happened this season, which i look forward to.

i do have a very, very icky feeling about what they did to marwa. from making her a shell of a person who just likes what nandor likes to LITERALLY turning her into a white man. i always kinda thought she and freddie would run off together and fall in love, because it feels kinda fitting for nandor and guillermo's false romantic leads, but not like this.

i am giving this "ending" for her the benefit of the doubt because i don't think it's over. nandor still has two wishes and i am pretty confident marwa and freddie will return in s5. i get the sense that the s3 finale will have consequences for the rest of the show and the trip that nandermo had stolen from them will continue to plague them and their relationship as well as everyone who their relationship impacts for a while.

i understand being angry at nandor, but i genuinely find him so interesting because while he has done a lot of morally horrible things i do NOT think he had any malicious intent and i don't think he wanted to hurt anyone- but he has and he is gonna have to cope with that. he isn't beyond redemption (if you wanna think of it like that) or past winning guillermo back but i think he is gonna have a real wake up call to how selfish and hurtful he has been before any of that can happen.

#wwdits #wwdits spoilers #nandor the relentless #nandermo

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gothicafish · 9 months

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WWDITS S5 SPOILERS

I feel like a lot of post I've seen about guillermo choosing to be human have never been in a situation where theyve wanted something so bad that they not only lose sight of why they wanted it but become so absorbed in not having it that they do something stupid about getting it. And that sounds like a very specific thing to feel but it happens in real life with in the most ordinary circumstances. And then when you finally have The Thing you realize it's not what you want or that you wanted it for the wrong reasons or weren't ready for it or all of the above. And I can't explain how normal it is to make such a sharp turn towards giving it up because it doesn't work for you/feel like you.

Just to put that feeling in a real life, non vampire sense, when I was in high school I really wanted a job. It seemed like all my friends had jobs and the idea of having my own money sounded fantastic, especially coming from a low income home where I hesitated to ask for things because I didn't feel they were immediately necessary or necessary at all in the light of our finances. So I applied several places (literally any place that was hiring) and every time I got a rejection email I felt so deflated and so brushed off and more importantly I felt like I wasn't worth anyone's time. So you can imagine how ecstatic I was when I got a call back from this hot dog place. I never really at there much but a job is a job. That's how viewed it and I wanted it so bad because I felt like I had so many things to prove, as a student, as a worker and as a functional person. So I go to the interview and I get the job. It was in the summer so I didn't have school and I worked in the mornings and evenings part time. And immediately it was not what I thought it was going to be. But I figured that was part of it yaknow getting to know a new place can be rough. But on the second or third day the owner dude of the restaraunt (who literally does nothing but come in and tell the workers shit) he comes in while I was doing dishes and keep in mind this is one of the first times I've done dishes in a restaurant environment (and if you've ever worked in food service you know there's a very specific way to wash dishes) so the dude comes in sees I'm doing it wrong and yells at my manager for not properly teaching me how to do something. The manager then tells me to ask if I don't know how to do something (I thought I was doing it right) and there were several incidences where he would come in and yell at somebody (and I'm talking have a full out burst) for something mediocre.

I remember this one time he came in and yelled at us because we left the back door open a Crack because the air conditioner wasn't working (it didn't work the whole Two months I was there). He said it was a hazard as someone random could come in and cause problems. And I would agree if it was sumer, over 100 degrees EVERYDAY EVEN AFTER THE SUN GOES DOWN AND IF WE DIDNT HAVE TWO STOVES TWO FRIERS AND A BOILING WATER STATION TO KEEP THINGS HOT. I literally went home every day dehydrated from sweating so much and that not an exaggeration AND WE WERENT ALLOWED TO HAVE DRINKS ALL WE HAD WAS A LIL CUP TO GET SOFT DRINKS FROM. So yeah I didn't work there very long. So not only was the boss a total freak wad (the managers were cool tho), I just felt so horrible at everything I was doing there. I would get told how not to do things on the daily and I would beat myself up about it. There were times were I would try not to cry because how badly I felt about myself and the job I was doing because of how many times I had to be told how to do things. I felt stupid, and the fact that my friends and people my age could do this everyday with out problems ONTOP of school made me feel worse. I would literally come home and cry because of how horrible being there made me feel. It bothered me so much that I've hesitated getting another job after that and now that I'm looking for a job to pay for college I feel so much anxiety about it being like that again. And I've sworn off food service cause fuck that. Everyone who works a food service/customer service jobs everyday of their lives deserves a metal of Valor bc goddam idk how you do it. So when it got to much for me I made an impulsive decision to quit and I did and I never went back. But I felt like shit afterwords about being so vocal about getting a job and then not being able to handle it, but it was a lot better than being there.

That was a very long winded way if saying I sympathize with guillermo and I understand him completely and how humiliating it can feel to be in that position. And I'm glad nandor and the crew was nice about it cause I felt it in my soul.

#what we do in the shadows #guillermo de la cruz #lazlo cravensworth #wwdits #nadja of antipaxos #nandor the relentless #the guide #before you come at me #i have adhd and that contributed to a lot of my doing things shittily at work #and the reason why i felt so bad about it #wwdits s5 #if you read this far youre a real one

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ineffably-human · 2 years

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"Well why didn't you do something? You should have gone and done something about it instead of just sitting here."

When the leaks came out two weeks ago, I was seriously in a period of mourning. Like I was truly, deeply upset for three days trying to process what was actually half-translated and poorly communicated. And it's a lot of the stuff other people were thinking when 4x9 first dropped. Were we being told it was wrong to desire growth and progress in these characters? Are we stupid for caring about the humanity in them? Were we supposed to hope Guillermo just escapes this toxic limbo forever?

We see so much of how these violent, sometimes half-crazy, ancient beings are dissatisfied with their lives. How they're capable of love and connection, how they want the same things that humans do... I couldn't believe that stagnation was the entire point. I couldn't believe the answer to 'can you change who you've always been?' was 'nope, sorry, nobody really does even when they're miserable.'

It feels important we care. It feels important that we feel unsettled by Colin reverting back to exactly how he was before, without even the slightest memory of being loved and looked after when as an adult he's so lonely. (That whistling, the way it breaks your heart and gives you a hope spot at the same time!) It's important they made it clear, before he finds that room, that as much as his instincts are calling out to him it's not what young Colin wanted or something he had a choice about. It was important that Laszlo and Nadja felt like they lost major, important pieces of their new lives, experiences they'd never had before even if they ended badly.

And Nandor... I don't think Nandor's as okay as he says. I think Nandor seems as aloof as he was when we first met him. It's withdrawing for recovery after the end of a lot of striving and struggling and pain. Eventually the scab is going to rip off and leave him with grief and depression again. Who's to say he hasn't had this experience before? He did tell Guillermo that he hadn't been really happy in decades. Maybe for a vampire, taking some 'me time' after a rough period is a decades-long affair.

But there's such a clear rift between him and the person he loves most now. Everyone's lost something, and Nandor and Guillermo have lost some of what they were building. I think they were losing it before the Freddie incident even happened. (Now would be the part of the slow-burn, by the way, where they get it back and reaffirm how much they belong together.)

When the leaks dropped, I read Guillermo's decision and I thought 'why?' This was the first season where I could think of plenty of explicit reasons he shouldn't become a vampire. He might never see his biological family again, even though he knows they love him. No matter what, he has to deal with his chosen family's selfishness. He sees how slow vampires change, he sees their ennui, how the big things they want are band-aids over their dissatisfaction. He knows he can stay human and still have physical power, emotional leverage, life experiences he's missed out on up to now because of all the waiting-waiting-waiting. Even having a foot in the supernatural world wouldn't have to change. His devotion and loyalty have waned somewhat, he's built relationships with the other housemates but they're not as strong.

It's not like he's so unexamined about his feelings that he'd ignore all those things to go be a vampire alone, to go hang out with a lonely dude working a counter (just like he was when Nandor met him) when that lonely dude just happens to be a vampire. Was he regressing? What the hell was he doing it for at this point? He hadn't even said goodbye!

It was like a gut punch of relief (seriously, the noise I made) when I found out exactly what the line was, the last thing Guillermo says before taking the money to Derek.

"Nothing in this house ever changes, nothing's ever going to change unless I change it."

He doesn't pack his things. The bag is full of money and only money. He won't need that closet anymore because it's no place to keep a coffin. (The attic, on the other hand, newly renovated and now the biggest room in the house...)

I want so badly to believe Guillermo is becoming a vampire because he is going to march straight back to the house, show off his fangs, and drag them all kicking and screaming into the life he's dreamed of along with him. To rescue them from themselves.

'I can use this power better. I can be the new blood. You need something to react to? React to this.' Because his dream is relentless but so is his capacity to love these people at their worst.

And if that just sounds like Guillermo saving the day again, well...

You guys want a jealousy arc? Imagine Nandor seeing that someone else stepped in and did what he wouldn't. Imagine a Guillermo made newly sexual as a vampire, having a well-deserved slut era as Nandor watches and wonders what's so different about him these days. Nandor being the one to eagerly listen to him, to sit beside him as he bosses people around...

More importantly, imagine Guillermo having a conflict between his slayer blood and vampire blood. Or leaning into the selfishness that comes with being a vampire, so much so that he starts to lose the parts of him the household really needs. Or pretending 'it's fine, it's fine, it's fine' when it's really anything but and this isn't how he's supposed to end up.

I need Guillermo to be the one to fuck up for once. I need him to do something so selfish it hurts others, I need him to do the right thing when it's hard. I need Nandor to save him or remind him of the best, most human parts of him when he's lost.

I can't wait to get that, if that's where we're going.

#fandom: wwdits #what we do in the shadows #wwdits spoilers #guillermo de la cruz #otp: nandermo #char: guillermo the relentless #i am a meta gremlin

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megaawkwardhuman · 11 months

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hello hi hey I'm icarus (but I'm also fine with virgo) and welcome to my blog!

idkf how you got here but uhhh congrats?

also sorry if parts of the gif look weird idfk how to fix it

I'm a neurodivergent artist who talks about gay vampires (wwdits) a lot!

I do have other interests tho like ofmd, good omens, hannibal, re-animator, interview with the vampire, watcher, the band ghost, the world of mr plant, and south park (it's just that wwdits is just what I think about the most)

things I've made:

I've written a few fic before and one can be found on my blog! it's a post season 4 nandermo fic and here's a link if you wanna check it out :)

as for the rest can be found on my ao3 here! (I'm not going to move the post season 4 fic there mainly cause idk if I really wanna)

I made a uquiz a few months ago that basically tells you what you would be if you where in the wwdits universe (a vampire, a familiar. an energy vampire etc)

I have an instagram that I just post my art to and that's really it

things I like to make:

as you can probably gather by now I primarily do pixel art but I also like to doodle/sketch with good old pencil and paper

I make a LOT of kandi (primarily singles) buuut I don't really post it on here (I mean unless someone asks me to I'm more than willing to share)

I kinda write? like I've written fics before and I DO have a bunch of wips but it's kinda hard for me to finish a fic due to the fact that I get distracted easily and the fact that I'm really dyslexic (you have no idea how badly I wanna fist fight the english language in a denny's parking lot at 3am)

oh while it's not a medium or anything but I'd like to mention I LOVE to draw characters from the media I like as pastel bunnies! (tho at this current moment it's primarily wwdits characters I draw) is it weird? yeah but I like to so I'm not stopping anytime soon if you want a rough explanation as to why I made a long post about it

fav characters:

guillermo de la cruz from wwdits (seriously I'm fucking feral for this man he's my top blorbo atm! he has my gender in a chokehold and I relate to him A LOT also harvey guillen is just really fucking hot-)

nandor the relentless also from wwdits (not as crazy about him but like he fascinates me and I love his goofy cringefail vibes... HE'S ALSO REALLY HOT-)

dib from invader zim (while I haven't watched invader zim in a while I still consider dib to be a fav! hell he's my fucking profile pic. he's one of the first ever characters in something I've seen that I've related to)

stede from ofmd (he's a huge fucking mood and I too jump into things head first without any plans whatsoever)

argos from twomp (a new addition to my fav character list since I stumbled upon twomp more recently. idk I just like him like go googly eye man date that murderous plant dude! wow that must sound weird to those who don't know what the world of mr plant is XD. it also might have to do with the fact that he's kinda socially awkward)

mr plant from twomp (another new addition. idfk something about that murderous plant I find oddly relatable? I think it's the fact that he's also socially awkward. arguably more than argos)

herbert west from re-animator (idk I think this autistic man with no care for ethics is neat)

I have more but for now those are the ones I'm gonna list :)

other shit:

as I've already said I have dyslexia, I possibly have ADHD (never officially diagnosed buuuuut really fucking confident I do and a past therapist said I most likely do), I keep running into situations where I question if I have autism or not so take that as you will, and despite what it may seem I have really REALLY bad social anxiety (well I have overall anxiety too but let's just say there's a reason I spend a lot of time online and not out and about)

asks as you can already tell are open

DMs are also open (tho I will say it's mainly to mutuals)

WARNING I KEYBOARD SMASH A LOT!

nandermo shipper but I'm fine with other ships involving the two :)

overall I try to be nice on here cuz there's enough negativity out there why add to it? tho key word here is try (I've gone on small rants here before and there's the possibility I will again)

I really REALLY fucking love bats and frogs THEY'RE JUST LITTLE GUYS HOW CAN I NOT?

there will be moments where for one reason or another (sleep deprived, sad, bored, it's a tueday, etc etc) I'll be reminded that oh yeah I fucking love frogs and will just start spam reblogging frog posts so be warned if you see me reblog a frog photo and read the words frog blogging or frog posting in the tags run while you still can (or don't cuz frogs are the best and need to be loved and cherished)

tag stuff:

misc thoughts/ideas/this tag is mainly random shit: throwing up my thoughts onto tumblr again

theories/meta/looking too much into small stuff: word garbage™

answering asks: answering stuff

my art: *funny tag for my art*

bunny art related posts: bun stuff

mothman memo related posts: mothman memo stuff

fanfics I've written: gather around and lend me your time

edits I've made: edit shmedit

memes I've made: brought to you by ms paint

show + tags thing: + tags

all the weekly wwdits sparkle on images: sparkle on it's gay vamp day!!!

posts that involve irl friends of mine: friend chaos

follow for a fuck ton of reblogs, art, and long tangents about whatever takes over my mind atm

thanks for reading, have a nice day, and remember: baby bats are called pups

this has nothing to do with this post I just thought this was important info plus I just wanted to throw in this cute bat image I found on google

#made a new intro post cuz I'm fucking bored :)

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harringrovetrashrat · 2 years

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so i'm writing the fic of it out lmao but

doing a what we do in the shadows inspired harringrove where steve is the vamp and billy is his familiar. billy is not a vampire hunter like guillermo, but he does badly wanna be a vamp. he's been steve's help for 7 years now and like, how long does it take?? he's getting older and like, he kinda wants to still look like this when he gets bit

billy is annoyed, but figures it takes like a decade or something. maybe a big thing to prove he should be gifted with being a vamp. he can deal with it. steve is great no he doesn't think how great it would be if he and steve could be together forever no he totally is gonna go off after being turned and just do his own shit, he didn't fall in love these past few years and sooooo doesn't wanna stay as long as steve will have him hopefully forever and compared to what some other familiars have had to do, he's probably got it easy

and then carol comes home one night, talking about a girl she turned. just for fun. just because she could

"what?" she asks, face still dripping with blood "there's no-- familiars are rarely turned i thought you knew that. usually they're used for menial tasks. honestly i'm not sure why steve keeps you around because you don't even do that."

and billy is floored. he's furious. he confronts steve. demands to know what he's up to

"what, were you having fun dangling this over my head? Ha ha, the sad sack wants to be a vampire, watch the monkey dance for something he'll never get." and billy shoves steve, angrier still that steve just lets him. steve breaks alarm clocks on the regular, billy knows he's strong. "i am just some stupid human to you? like some cute fucking pet?!" and billy is so angry because he thought maybe steve liked him, but no, he's just some huge butt of the joke--

"no, billy!" steve protests, grabbing billy's wrists and holding them. "billy, please, that's not it--"

"then what is it?!" billy screams, angry tears starting to spill down his cheeks in the way he hates.

"you're going to leave me!" steve screams back and it's so broken and sad it's like a wave rocking billy to his core. the force of it makes him let steve go and stumble back. steve himself slumps against the wall and slides down, taking a shuddery breath and covering his eyes with his arm. “you’re going to leave me and i’d rather have any time with you than… than live an eternity knowing i can’t have you.” steve sniffles. “it’s easier if… if you’re mortal. then it’s not your choice to leave.” billy stares at where steve sits, rubbing his eyes onto an outrageously poofy sleeve of a renaissance shirt, the side tucked into the waist of the cat print boxers steve loves so much.

“why would i– why do you– what?” billy asks, because he’s so confused. because he’s happy and overwhelmed and still angry and so fucking confused–

“you always talk about your plans,” steve says, eyes red as he reveals himself from behind his sleeve. “about how you’re gonna leave, travel the world, do great things. and… and how you’re gonna do it alone.” billy had said all those things, that was true. but–

“i–” billy begins.

“it’s stupid,” steve says, “that i’ve been so fucking selfish. but i… i don’t think i can exist knowing you’re out there and i can’t have you.”

“you have me,” billy croaks out. “are you kidding? you’ll always have me.” and steve just looks pained.

“please, don’t lie to me–”

“steve, you can tell if i’m lying. i give you permission okay.” he takes steve’s hand, holds it to his heart as steve stares with wide brown eyes. billy takes a deep breath and says all the things he never thought he would. because he never thought that an old vampire, one who had lived for centuries, would have seen him and wanted him. would have thought he was funny, and worthy, and handsome. hoped, but steve had lived so much life, billy was an insignificant part. at least, he had thought he was. “i have been saying all those things to convince myself it’s what i wanted. because i fell in love with you along the way these past few years and i couldn’t– originally it is what i wanted. and i thought i could lie to myself enough that it would still be true.” steve is staring, gaping, shocked at the vulnerability billy was showing. “but it’s not what i want. not anymore.”

“what do you want?” is the whispered, eager response.

“you. forever.” and without another hesitation, steve pulls billy forward, kisses his neck, and bites.

#vampire steve #harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington #wwdits inspired #carol perkins #apologues everything is lowercase lmao #regular fic i do with Grammar and Capitalization but ramblings usually not #just wanted to get this bit out at least

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youaremysunshine-court · 2 years

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Tldr; the wwdits writers know a thing or two about depression and being tired of life, nandor is a prime example, allow them to bring about his character arc in a natural way

Nandor's 'I'm whispering bc I care about marwa and don't want her to know I'm about to replace her' gives me hope and much food for thought. Excuse the rambling because I'm fleshing this thought out as i go.

Because he's just self aware enough to know when his actions are making people sad. It means that he knows when he's doing/ done something wrong, and actually, I was super mad about this episode be guillermo and marwa and freddie deserved better, but now that I'm thinking more clearly, the writers have been leading up to this.

Everytime nandor does something wrong, he does notice. A lot of it is stupid dumb shit like getting locked in a cage at the rescue shelter. But when he pushed guillermo off the balcony during their fight, he has a millisecond of hesitation before he says OOPSIES. Likewise, when he's discussing the freddie fiasco, he considers for a moment that he's doing something wrong, then very deliberately glosses over it like it's nothing. (For more, see nadja figuring out he pillaged her village, leaving benjy alone and hypnotised, turning Gail without her consent, etc)

I believe the reason for this is a very specific turn the writers want to take with nandor as a character. It's a fact that nandor hasn't been happy for a long time, but this fact only becomes evident from the latter half of season 2 onwards. This is also when he starts fucking up more, and instead of taking responsibility the way he did with Sean and the brain scramblies, he starts to write things off like they don't really matter.

Had the vampires not stated clearly that he was going through vampire depression, it would have been evident from the way he just... stopped caring about everything and everyone. Compounded by guillermos apparent betrayal in 3×10, I believe he just kept sinking into these feelings, until he became the nandor we see in s4.

I know in a previous post i said they'd just made him into an asshole incel (which btw I do still think), I believe its a mask for the terrible depression he's going through. He's a lonely lonely vampire who wishes he could be human, who wants a lifeline so badly he'll cling to one made of gum and feathers at this point, and he's been in this despairing state for a while.

First, he clutched onto guillermo, thinking if he made him a vampire then they'd be happy. Then, he decided a wife would fix him. But she didn't, so he thought she needed to be changed. All this while he's struggling both with depression and buried feelings for guillermo. Which means when guillermo and freddie show up, happy and gay, he is intensely envious and immediately latches on to "what he's been missing".

Freddie. Freddie is the stand in for everything nandor wants but can't have. A human, slightly nerdy boyfriend, who dresses like the pits of fashion and knows enough about nandors niche interests to be interesting. He's the "perfect fix". Until he isn't.

This episode made a lot of people, including me, very very angry. But I think we need to look past this to what nandors really struggling with and allow the writers to let him grow without praising them for some episodes and cursing them for other, heartbreaking but necessary ones.

Honestly I'm pissed about the ending they forced on marwa, because yes she deserved to stab him at least once. But once again, I think that last shot of them together just highlights how far gone nandor is. She looks miserable, because he IS miserable. Marwa doesn't like him because he doesn't like himself. Marwa doesn't like living because nandor doesn't like living.

Sure, he smiles and laughs with freddie, but he's uncomfortable not knowing human jokes. Even the second time around he looks deeply unhappy when he's laughing at the roomba joke. He wants to be a part of this little clique humans have SO SO badly, but at the end of the day he is other.

And finally, that shot at the end where nandor cries after leaving freddie on the train. Is he grieving leaving freddie or is he grieving the travels he could have had with guillermo? Is he really crying or just scrunching up his face for the cameras? It all comes down to the original question: does he care? And the answer is, no, not anymore, not for a long time.

In conclusion, this has been long and rambling, but I can't wait to see how far he has to fall before he hits rock bottom, or if this is perhaps rock bottom. At that point I would like to see if he wishes to become human, or wishes that he'd always be happy. Or, my favourite option, I would like to see who the writers bring in as the person who shows him how to heal himself. Either way, the writers have brought the show this far without ruining it, and I trust them with this episode and the bigger picture, and I can only hope that they follow through on that.

#wwdits #nandor the relentless #not tagging this as nandermo bc it isnt #as someone who went thru a period where i literally did nothing beyond lying around and crying and not being able to stop crying #i can see a bit of myself in nandor #i fucked up a lot in that time and i just couldnt bring myself to care #i said some really insensitive things and then brushed them off and moved on #it wasnt my proudest moment but i yanked myself up and i hope nandor cam do the same #anyway character growth uwu good writing uwu nandor character development U fucking WU

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spookymultimedia · 2 years

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Heartaches [18+]

Laszlo spends the evening alone with his mixed up feelings towards four different men in his life and wishes his polyamorous heart would take a fucking break

CW: there is strongly suggestive content but nothing explicitly in detail. This is not a lewd fic but the themes are mature.

'Heartaches, heartaches

My loving you meant only heartaches

Your kiss was such a sacred thing to me

I can't believe it's just a burning memory

Heartaches, heartaches

What does it matter how my heart breaks

I should be happy with someone new

But my heart aches for you."

The phonograph crackled out music in the small library of the house as Laszlo was laid facing down on his belly next to the fireplace with his face resting in his arms. Crickets hummed outside the window accompanying the music. Cold November wind blew harsh against the house. The boy was fast asleep in his bed and Nadja had been working at the club leaving the tired vampire alone with his thoughts. He was vexed by the thoughts of men, specifically. Multiple men whom he felt a variety of feelings and affections towards and it all spiraled into a headache of heavy feelings that left him stressed.

Love. Love was one of the emotions that was spiraling through his mind. His charming human neighbor Sean Rinaldi has been his sights for a year now his crush on the fellow had blossomed into something romantic. His spirit fluttered with joy when he walked into the room. The air was light and Laszlo's mood brightened. His voice was like a melody that could stain his memory for weeks. He was witty, bold and beautiful. He could never get as close to the man as he desperately desired. He recalled the prior week while, for a moment, he was hand in hand with Sean pretending to be lovers and parents of baby Colin Robinson. He remembered how soft his hand was and how his hand felt on his knee. Sean wouldn't remember but Laszlo certainly did. For a moment it was real. For a moment they were lovers. He wanted to be Sean's lover so badly. He wanted to embrace him and kiss him and make sweet love to him and belong to Sean. But that love was mixed with fear. He was scared of getting too close to Sean and getting burned. He was scared of rejection. What if Sean wasn't queer or keen on loving him in that way? What if he ruined their existing relationship? What if Sean knew the truth about who he was? Would he be scared? Even worse, what if Sean did love him back? Sean was human and he didn't know if Sean wanted to be a vampire. Humans are delicate things. Humans die. Someday Sean would die and Laszlo would have to live on without him.

Grief. Grief was another emotion. Everyday he yearned for his deceased lover Colin Robinson. His love for Sean was challenged with guilt. Was he trying to fill this unbearable empty space with Sean? Was his sickly sweet adoration a shallow ruse? Could he be using Sean as a distraction from his grief? No, Sean could never replace the one true Colin Robinson. Colin could never be replaced. He knew that. But the void that Colin used to fill certainly made him feel a unique loneliness for another. It was unfair. Sure, the time he spent with Colin was full of passion and love, he didn't regret any moment of his amorous relationship with him, but it only lasted a number of months and before he knew it all of it was turned to dust. It was so brief that the memory felt like a dream. His time spent with Colin was wonderful and even though Nadja would never ever admit it he had heard her sobbing in the daytime over the loss of Colin Robinson. He remembered Guillermo recalling the first night in those crates to London. He could hear her crying all alone for Colin. He was hurt knowing that his lady wife was also grieving. She, however, hid her feelings under a thick veil. Colin Robinson touched their lives.

Bitterness. Nandor the Relentless was a man whom his relationship with had been growing more sour as the days went by. Did he love him? Yes, they had been close companions for centuries. Nandor had been someone he had confided in once. Once he felt happy with him. He was fun. He was someone he felt like he could really bare his soul and talk to. He remembered one particular time when he spent all day hunched up in the basement in a gigantic pillowfort watching SpaceJam on the television, which was inside the fortress. He remembered being cuddled up and talking about everything on their mind. He felt like a fool to think he meant anything to Nandor. It was getting harder to call Nandor his friend. His rose tinted glasses were broken and now he could see Nandor for the selfish insecure ass he was. His trust for Nandor was shattered on the day his beloved Colin had died. He stood there stunned as Nandor dismissed his wife when she told him Colin Robinson was dead. She was vulnerable and sorrowful and he had disrespected her with skepticism. He stood there watching in horror as Nandor ridiculed their feelings. He spent the entirety of Colin's party thinking about himself. He didn't care and if he did he was too cowardly to show it. He believed that Nandor was too busy with his stupid face and his stupid wedding to think about how he treated others. In that moment in Colin Robinson's bedroom, something broke within Laszlo; their friendship was broken. He felt like nothing to Laszlo and it tore him up inside.

Guillermo. The felt lust towards the fellow was the icy snow on his mountain of the emotions piled up in his mind. The lad was unremarkably sexy. He wanted fuck him. He wanted to fuck that murderous chap. He fantasized seducing Guillermo into taking advantage of him. He dreamed of being under the killer's control; he wanted to be captured and tamed by him. He wanted Guillermo to let out his frustrations and put him in his place. His mind wandered there often when he spent time alone in his shed. Guillermo felt like something forbidden and naughty not only as a vampire killer but as Nandor's ex familiar. He didn't deserve such a beautiful human. A human like Guillermo deserved to be worshiped in bed with an attentive head between his large orc-like legs like the beautiful warrior he was. Nandor would be furious to know he fucked the man who he was closest to. His closest friend of 13 years. He knew Nandor longer than that!? What the fuck did that make him?!! Nothing?

Love, grief, bitterness and lust were the four horsemen that plagued his psyche. He laid there on the library floor feeling all four of these emotions all at once. Somehow they all connected to each other in a cycle that nauseated him. He closed his eyes, wishing his emotional heart would stop feeling. He wished his feelings would just blow away like the wind outside the house. He felt a hand brush against his shoulder. He immediately recognized it as his wife's hand. He looked up at her. "You're home early." He muttered.

"The workers had a walk out. I tried everything. If you can't beat them, join them." She sighed dryly in defeat.

He huffed out a chuckle and smiled, "I'm sure you'll think of something my love."

She smiled and ran a hand through my hair, "Now, what are you doing sulking on the floor like a dead fish?"

He frowned and moaned. "I'm exhausted Nadja, I'm tired of how much I feel for other men. My amorous feelings bring me nothing but strife. I don't even know why I spend my time and energy on such stupid emotions. " he said bitterly.

"Did Sean reject you?" She frowned in sympathy. He winced.

"Not-not verbally but his body language implies it. I don't know. I don't believe he swings that way my beauty," I rubbed my eyes trying to alleviate my aching head,"Am I smitten for this man? Yes. But frankly he's not the only man on my mind right now. I'm still in grief, Nandor is an massive bloody arsehole, and I am getting sexual fantasies about Guillermo that I am struggling comprehend-." He started to cry. It was too much stress and emotion for his dead heart to handle. "I want it to stop."

"Laszlo you're going to worry yourself into insanity one of these days." She shook her head. "Why can't you just talk to Seanie? Just get it all out and deal with it."

"It's not that easy." He shook his head.

"Just tell him the truth!"

"Oh so am I supposed to waltz up to his door and say: 'Oh surprise I am actually a blood sucking vampire who's madly in love with you and who's been thinking of your hands gripping my sopping wet dick!' in front of his wife??!"

She looked him up and down, "Yes." she answered, looking at him like he was the one talking crazy.

"Absolutely not. No. That would not end well at all." He shook his head am groaned," I am desperately in need a good fucking." He breathed out and rubbed his head. "That'll do my mind good. I don't want to think about anything but your body for the next 12 hours, thank you very much. No men. No more. I've had enough."

She grinned in delight, "Oh Laszlo I quite agree, I have some stress I need help with myself. There's nothing more stress relieving than sex," she said as she pulled him onto his feet before leading him to their chambers.

#18+#18+ fic #suggestive text #wwdits fanfiction #what we do in the shadows #laszlo x sean #laszlin #laszlo x nandor #Laszlo x Guillermo #nadja x laszlo #laszlo cravensworth #sean rinaldi #colin robinson #nandor the relentless #queerplatonic exes #queerplatonic ship #guillermo de la cruz #nadja cravensworth #Spotify

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gerandor · 11 months

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alexander accepted nandor's invite out of pity though so i don't know where this idea that he would want to see nandor again when their first outing was a disaster is coming from here. nandor can be pretty off putting to people who aren't used to him. so can all the other vampires, they're not exactly the most sensitive bunch or even the most up to date with social conventions as shown by nandor talking through the movie (that shit's annoying when you're watching tv at home but at the theatre that's just a full stop no for me). and i know we all collectively breathed a sigh of relief that the show didn't go down some antisemitic road but talking about wanting to meet a jewish person so badly like you'd talk about collecting pokemons and calling a jewish person a slur (yeah i know jewish people use it to refer to ourselves but goys really really shouldn't) is the kind of shit that flies around the vamps because they don't care and guillermo because he knows nandor doesn't mean any harm. but if nandor said any of that weird shit around alexander... yeah i don't think he would call again.

Hi! Sorry this answer got a bit too long!

Ok so for context, this ask is most likely in response to this post i made about one possible interpretation (actually two. I added another reading immediately after the first one) of the scene with Guillermo on the phone.

I think it's fair to assume that you know about interpretations and different readings of text as this is exactly the same practice you used to read Alexander's words “he seemed harmless and kinda lonely” as meaning “I pitied him and was so annoyed at him at the movies that I didn't want to be around him anymore.”

And well. That's also the same method i used. I had a text and I tried to use cues from the text to read it in my own way. And I don't think there's anything wrong with that. In fact that's what we all do with text. We try to read it in our own way and it's our different readings that enrich the actual text. But yes when the readings aren't supported by facts from text it gets annoying and unbelievable. But i thought i gave enough reasons in that post, so I won't repeat them here.

But i will expand on it.

In that scene when nandor asks if it's Alexander on the phone, Guillermo presses the phone to his chest and he actually cowers and he sounds so guilty for some reason. I'm not saying it definitely means it was Alexander on the phone but it shows Guillermo is hiding something. So the question is, what? I tried to come up with one possibility.

Also i thought most of us agreed that Guillermo looked jealous when nandor was talking about acquiring a new friend? He definitely didn't look pleased that nandor was spending his time with someone new.

And you used your own personal feeling about people talking in the movies to support your view that Alexander didn't want to be around nandor after watching a movie with him. But that's just a reading. As long as we don't get Alexander actually saying in words that he didn't want to be around nandor bc he found him so annoying at the movies, we can all have our own interpretations why he didn't want to be friends with nandor anymore. (And the scene with nandor showing him his...ehem penis, i think that was just the last straw, bc before that he was trying to completely ignore nandor.)

And in fact, the show seems to be encouraging our various readings by not actually telling us who it was Guillermo was talking to on the phone. Isn't it interesting that the scene immediately cuts off to nandor smashing the phone and saying ‘it's not fair’? What isn't fair? Who was Guillermo talking to? The show doesn't tell us bc it wants us to speculate.

I also wrote in the tags that i actually hope that my reading wasn't correct bc if Guillermo is being petty and jealous (like how he was about gail and jenna, so it's not too ooc for him) and wants to sabotage Nandor's friendship with others, then i want the show to actually be upfront about it. I don't want it to be sth people speculate about when every time nandor messes up, it's there for everyone to see (and hate nandor for it.)

As to the whole jewish discourse which i don't know how it's relevant to my post…i’m not jewish and i’m not the right person to talk about it and tbh i have no idea about the slur you talked about. But i have seen some posts by Jewish people who said they actually loved the representation. The episode was directed by yana Gorskaya who is of jewish descent and ive heard that she said she had taught kayvan the jewish slangs. I personally didn't think it was offensive that nandor always wanted to have a jewish friend. He even described them as brave and fierce warriors which are the kind of qualities nandor appreciates in others and prides himself on.

But you're welcome to your own interpretation.

#nandor the relentless #wwdits spoilers #guillermo de la cruz #wwdits asks #wwdits s5 #wwdits #nandermo #what we do in the shadows

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cookinguptales · 10 months

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my favourite thing about wwdits is how freeing it is to watch something and not have to fear the moment it all goes to shit because the characters have to Pay for their Sins. It's the opposite of nihilistic. I hope they keep being toxic assholes forever.

Right! That's just it. It's just such a drastically different system of morality than you get in most shows, and that can be really fun. When step one is a bunch of creatures that unrepentantly feed on innocent humans (and a human who's Really Into That), you really have to be working with a totally unique values system. It's actually really fun to have a show about monsters that really leans into how funny the monstrous is. It makes things way more unpredictable.

Like... to use the offered comparison, Succession is a show (that I also watched and mildly enjoyed) about realistically awful characters doing realistically awful things in realistically awful scenarios. You just cannot compare that to a show where one of the protagonists murders Sofia Coppola for funsies and it's never mentioned again. I had many moments while watching that show when I thought to myself, "I really wish Shiv would pull a Nadja and kill everyone in this room" but alas, she could not, because Succession is a realistic show with realistic characters and she would presumably go to jail for the rest of her life.

But you're right, watching a show that is totally devoid of those values and that system of punishments for misdeeds is super fun. You can just see these characters be radically awful and enjoy it. That's actually something I've really enjoyed about s5; it's making it clear that Guillermo has been living by this radical values system for a decade now, and other humans (see: his family) do not appreciate it. I think it's really fun to look at how vampires live by totally different rules than humans do, and I think it's fun that that's part of why Guillermo wants to become one so badly. (And I think it's fun that it's going terribly for him.)

I love WWDITS. It's like microdosing on a lil bit of ferality every week.

#wwdits tag #replies

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quillyfied · 2 years

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Current WWDITS S4E1-2 thoughts:

- yep teared up at the intro not gonna lie I did do that

- NADJA MY BELOVED. AND WHAT A DRESS.

- okay but Laz how TF did the house get that messed up in a YEAR. Like on the one hand it’s a metaphor for their family (not escaping me that Guillermo is jumping in to fix it and keep it together despite much sighing and passive aggression) but also LASZLO WHAT ON EARTH DID YOU DO THE BASEMENT IS A POND AND THERE IS PLANT GROWTH EVERYWHERE.

- The Boy immediately reciting pi instead of the card password is peak Colin Robinson and I’m very pleased at his progress

- brief moment to scream about Nandor and Guillermo being friends and on a more equal footing, equally rabid excitement about this being Nandor’s pining era while Guillermo takes care of himself and doesn’t put up with Nandor’s or any of the others’ bull anymore. Nandor immediately jumping in to save Guillermo. Nandor respecting Guillermo’s feelings to a greater degree. Nandor and Guillermo y’all.

- calling it now, Guillermo’s London boyfriend is a vampire or something similar. Is he dating actual Freddie Mercury? Debatable but I’m willing to believe it wholeheartedly.

- they found some real raunchy ones for the Guide’s unlocked memories, huh? Oof. Wow. (Also brief moment to also scream about what others picked up on, how SLEEPING WITH A VAN HELSING COST THE GUIDE HER MEMORIES AND THE LAST EPISODE OF THE SEASON IS CALLED MEMORIES. COOL. COOL COOL COOL. Also choosing to tie this in with my theory that Freddie is a vampire bc the alternative is Nandor gets the ole memory wipe and while I love that I also don’t see how that helps Nandor in his character arc yet? We will see.)

- Guide has some Issues, poor thing. Not sure Laszlo was the best to help her with that XD but he’s the best we’ve got. Also: uhhh Nadja from whence comes this desire to open a vampire nightclub? Let’s explore that next. Also drooling for more details about her time in London, clearly something deeper going on with her.

- I would very much like to go back to the whole “Nandor’s home village is an unchanged by time vampire community now” and his whole “well if everyone is a vampire then it means there’s nothing special about being a vampire” thing. Because. Uh. Hmm. Cool thing to say to Guillermo, who still very badly wants to be a vampire, and very interesting to dig into re: group dynamics and Nandor’s continued unwillingness to change Guillermo and how everyone else in his life is a vampire except Guillermo, Djinn, and now Marwa I guess.

- I wanted more episodes with all the wives. Like I get juggling 37 spouses is a lot but. They were fun and I wanted more time with them. Especially dishing to the cameras the dirt on Nandor bc Yes. Good luck to Marwa, and bless her soul, she deserves better.

- Laszlo trying so hard to make sure The Boy doesn’t become Colin Robinson. If anything, it’s gonna make him into an even more unhinged and powerful Colin Robinson and I can’t wait to see it. Or he’s going to be exactly the same, which I’m excited to see too.

- excited! Ready for it! How did a tree wind up in the house! WHAT DID YOU DO LASZLO!!

#wwdits #wwdits spoilers #wwdits season 4 #good times good fun good vibes #this one is gonna be fun

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gui1lermodelacruz · 11 months

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[ Indi Mutuals Only RP Blog for Guillermo de la Cruz from What We Do in the Shadows. Familiar, Bodyguard, Van Helsing, Vampire, Guillermo de la Cruz

Very crossover friendly, always up for plotting. if we are mutuals, you are free to send me asks any time, which you are free to continue!

written & loved by sofia, 30+. established july 16th, 2023. / Follow my sideblog: @thedjiinn // follow Ed & Izzy @indestructiblelittlefckr

Affiliated with: @therelentless

Useful links: Van Helsing lore, send me starters / memes. also here are a couple of opens (can be one-liners/paras, I will match the length!)

Exploration in: loyalty, making reckless decisions, wanting to belong, feeling alienated from everyone, realizing that what you thought you wanted was just... not it, sense of being unappreciated, loneliness, unrequited love, wanting something so badly you would do anything for, years of obsession, getting impatient and much more

post s5-finale: There are so many things to explore in Guillermo like how he will see the past 13 years of his life, what he has done and what he actually wants, seeing the difference between his found family and his biological one, more about his Van Helsing side, how much he actually loves Nandor and how he really doesn't stay because he wants something from him, his dynamics with the other vampires...and so many more!

And I'd love for him to have more friends to talk about these stuff and explore these things with! And see where our muses will end up in the story! I hope you guys are up for it!

Rules & more info here CARRD, please read the rules at least?]

#hello!

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wizardpink · 2 years

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Hey if anyone wants to read my long rambling WWDITS / Nandermo thoughts have at it.

Been thinking a lot about the state of nandermo after today's episode because:

I do not see what Guillermo is doing to his boyfriend to be anywhere as obviously wrong as what Nandor is doing. I don't buy into the idea that he is "emotionally cheating" by ignoring his bf for work stuff. Every moment he isn't doing familiar/ bodyguard stuff he is on the phone. And I don't think he is more emotionally invested in Nandor right now than his boyfriend.

Why?

Because Nandor absolutely is doing all those things with Marwa. He is faking being in love with her SO HARD. I think Nandor's arc is leading him in two directions right now: the first, having to realize that a relationship is not the cure for his depression, and the second, realizing he is down bad for Guillermo. Which yes, are conflicting struggles, but that's what makes his journey compelling. It insures conflict and plotlines for a loooong time. That's great.

And I think what they are trying to show us is that Nandor and Guillermo have passed each other like ships in the night, essentially flip flopping with each other on how they feel. Nandor has to come to terms with not only being hot for his familiar, but his familiar that has moved on without him. He's not gonna take that well.

But anyway back to Guillermo. I've been thinking of how this season (or maybe into next season) is gonna shake out for him. And I've been thinking-- Guillermo is getting off pretty easy in the public opinion department this season. Even though he has always been the nicest of the main characters and easiest to love, he is STILL a serial accomplice to murder. But even more important to the writing of this show, Guillermo's constant misfortune is the backbone of like half the comedy of WWDITS.

What I'm saying is, he is not getting his happy ending just yet.

Which has led me to the personal theory that his boyfriend has no idea that Guillermo is a vampire familiar / slayer / bodyguard.

It isn't just because of the low hanging fruit of hijinx ensuing while he tries to hide his life from his love interest, and the inevitable fallout. But also because we need to be reminded that Guillermo can be an asshole too. Guillermo, who alienated all his friends and family to chase this dream of being a blood sucking vampire, who has missed his mother's birthday three years in a row and only tried to save Jeremy at the very last second.

We need to see Guillermo do something to warrant all the shit he is subjected to, because ending his torment just isn't an option right now.

At this point though him doing something shitty to any of the main cast isn't enough, because THEY deserve it too. Guillermo needs to hurt someone who doesn't deserve it.

Now he could do that by cheating on his new boyfriend but I don't see that for him, and I really don't think Nandermo as an explored concept is there yet, nor will they be in the next six episodes. I believe Guillermo when he says he's not jealous and when he smiles at his phone. He loves this guy! He wants to be with him! So how else can he hurt him? With his past, and with the truth. And it's totally within Guillermo's character to be afraid to tell someone he loves all this vampire shit (and honestly can you blame him...).

So I think this is going to end badly for Guillermo and I have a million and one thoughts on that, from a jealous Nandor outing Guillermo, to the boyfriend getting accidentally killed but it looking like Nandor did it on purpose (ESPECIALLY if Nandor has confessed just before the guy is killed), to Guillermo feeling guilty about lying to this sweet innocent guy only for it to turn out the guy is also a vampire slayer and playing him to get to Nadja and the Supreme Vampiric Council so Guillermo has to kill him himself (I AM REALLY HOPING FOR THIS ONE).

Anyway the point of all this babbling is that if Nandermo are endgame in this series I think we have a long way to go. I think they have an enemies to lovers arc in their future and they aren't even at the enemies stage yet. And even if they aren't, Guillermo AND Nandor have some more shit to wade through personally and plot wise before either of them has a happy resolution or a healthy relationship.

And also I hope Marwa gets all of Nandor's treasure in the divorce and runs off with the Djinn because he is hot.

#if you read this whole thing you are a masochist #wwdits spoilers #wwdits

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