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underworld-park-offical · 5 months

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TOLKIEN: Zzzzzzzzrzrzrzrrzzzz

TOLKIEN: Zzazzazazezezezezezrzrzzrrzrrr

PHONE: ♪ I'M A BARBIE GIRL ♪

PHONE: ♪ IN THE BARBIE WORLD ♪

PHONE: ♪ LIFE IN PLASTIC ♪

PHONE: ♪ IT'S FANTASTIC ♪

TOLKIEN: Huhhheheehdbfd…

TOLKIEN: Huh

TOLKIEN: What

TOLKIEN: What the fuck?

TOLKIEN: Why is my phone going off?

TOLKIEN: Are the fucking queers calling me again?

TOLKIEN: Eeeeyup its them

TOLKIEN: What

GARY: Have you ever been beaten by a wet spaghetti noodle by your girlfriend cuz she has a twin sister and you got confused and fucked her dad, well that’s how it feels to drive a Ford F-250. That sounds really cool. But you know what else is cool? The new 2020 Ford F-150, winner of 10 J.D. power awards. Perfect for hauling big things and going long distances. But you want to go offroad? Try the new Raptor Edition, which cannot just go offroad, it is perfect for going extreme off-roading. You can go rock climbing or across a desert, really quickly. It is also good for the great American thing - BBQs! In fact, you can haul MORE than one oven! That's pretty cool, huh? So hurry, and buy the new 2020 Ford F-150, now for sale at your local Ford dealership. RED: Wgat RED: Stop RED: Stop speaking BEBE: Girl get the tape from the backseat RED: Already on it NICHOLE: Heyyyy Tolkien NICHOLE: Did I wake you?

TOLKIEN: …

TOLKIEN: No..

NICHOLE: Oh NICHOLE: That’s NICHOLE: That's good

TOLKIEN: What's going on

NICHOLE: So uhm NICHOLE: Ahahaha NICHOLE: Funny story

TOLKIEN: Nichole what did you do??

TOLKIEN: Did you fuckin

TOLKIEN: Commit fraud?

TOLKIEN: …

TOLKIEN: Again?

NICHOLE: What NICHOLE: No NICHOLE: Of course not NICHOLE: I am a law abiding citizen NICHOLE: Except for when it comes to the Barbie Movies

TOLKIEN: Okay? We’ve all pirated a Barbie Movie

TOLKIEN: What makes you special?

TOLKIEN: If it's not fraud or piracy what did you even do

NICHOLE: There’s a sentient advertisement in our Porsche now

TOLKIEN: …

TOLKIEN: Excuse me?

NICHOLE: Yeah uh NICHOLE: We saw Gary NICHOLE: Or G-4R-Y if you wanna use his actual name? NICHOLE: Fuck I don't know anymore NICHOLE: He was walking in the cold for some reason? NICHOLE: And you know how he only speaks in ads?

TOLKIEN: We all do

BEBE: Wait BITCH do you think we could reprogram him to be like

BEBE: An ALEXA???

GARY: Need some music for that impromptu dance off? Ask Alexa to play songs or playlists from Prime Music and Spotify so you're always ready to show off your sweet moves-if that's what you call them ;) "Amazon Echo: Alec Baldwin and Missy Elliott Dance Party Commercial" via @popisms :https://www.popisms.com/TelevisionCommercial/126873/Amazon-Echo-Commercial-2016 GARY: I really don't want you to see me like this. You need some entrance music. Alexa, play Alex dance playlist. Playing Alex playlist. That's dance music? Alexa, play Pep Rally by Missy Elliott. Really? Perfect! I got a little something for you. It's beautiful. Does this mean I'm gonna be in your next video? Let me see what you got. (Lyrics) Anything you want me to (Lyrics) Pep rally, pep rally, pep rally Oh, this a pep rally Pep rally, pep rally, pep rally Bounce, biggity bounce, biggity-biggity bounce, bounce Where my clappers that stomp? Now rock with it Bounce, biggity bounce, biggity-biggity bounce via @popisms : https://www.popisms.com/TelevisionCommercial/126873/Amazon-Echo-Commercial-2016 GARY: I’m Gary! The Mormon who advertises! RED: I mean RED: I’ll become a mechanic if it gets him to stfu 💀💀💀 WENDY: No- RED- NO PUT THE WRENCH DOWN! RED: FUCK YOU GARY: The future. You used to chase it. Now you’re living in it. The Wavefront is an all-electric automobile that propels driving into a new era. With sleek, aerodynamic design, and ultrasonic sensors that prevent collisions, there’s no more getting left behind. Life’s short. Drive fast. GARY: I’m Gary! The Mormon who advertises! RED: SHUT THE FUCK UP!! WENDY: RED!! NO!! BEBE: GIRLY POPS AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU BEBE: I'M GONNA HIT A DEER IF YOU ALL DONT HUSH RED: WENDY LET ME GO I'M GONNA KILL HIM WENDY: WE ARE NOT KILLING THE AD NICHOLE: SHUT THE FUCK UP IM ON THE PHONE BEBE: SHUT THE FUCK UP I'M DRIVING!!!! RED: CAN I THROW HIM OUT OF THE FUCKING CAR??!?!?!?!?!? WENDY AND NICHOLE: NO!!! NICHOLE: Tolkien I'm gonna have to let you go NICHOLE: We might die- NICHOLE: RED PUT DOWN THE WRENCH YOU'RE GONNA KILL SOMEONE! RED: THAT'S THE GOAL!! GARY: As a parent, I want to know that my kids are safe wherever they are. That includes riding in the car. With the new Carpool Optic from Solar I can breathe easy knowing my kids will arrive where they need to safely – whether I am the driver or not. RED: AUGHHHH!!!!!! NICHOLE: I’m hanging up now NICHOLE: MMMMMMMMMOKAYBYE

TOLKIEN: Bye?

(Beep Beep Beep)

TOLKIEN: Jesus christ

TOLKIEN: (Yawn)

TOLKIEN: Man

KENNY: Hey

TOLKIEN: Ah!

TOLKIEN: Oh my god I got jumpscared by a fucking queer!

KENNY: Oh hardy har har har

KENNY: You got games on yo phone?

TOLKIEN: …

TOLKIEN: What

KENNY: Do you got games

KENNY: On yo phone

TOLKIEN: I mean like

TOLKIEN: I got like

TOLKIEN: Subway surfers??

TOLKIEN: If

TOLKIEN: If that works???

TOLKIEN: Uh

TOLKIEN: Ok?????

TOLKIEN: Here

KENNY: Thanks

KENNY: Oh yeah, can I call my sister while I play subway surfers?

KENNY: I gotta make sure she’s not

KENNY: Yknow

KENNY: Fuckin’ dead

TOLKIEN: No you’re gonna kill my damn battery

TOLKIEN: Just call your sister you dont need to play fucking subway surfers

KENNY: Fine

KENNY: Killjoy

TOLKIEN: Ugh

KAREN: I can't believe McDonald's served me that lukewarm fucking patty

KAREN: And then had the AUDACITY to tell me KAREN: That it gets cold over time!?!?

KAREN: I think they just undercooked it ON PURPOSE to make ME look like an idiot

TRICIA: Damn, that's crazy

(🎵 KAREN METAL 🎵 )

KAREN: OH MY GOD

KAREN: WHO'S CALLING ME AT EXACTLY 1:59 IN THE MORNING?!?!?

TRICIA: Bro just say 2 AM 💀

TRICIA: …

TRICIA: I can’t believe I just said that out loud

KAREN: WHAT?!?!?

KENNY: Hi

KAREN: WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME?!?!?

KAREN: DO YOU KNOW HOW LATE IT IS?!?!?!

KAREN: I WANT TO SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER

KENNY: Sis it's me

KAREN: UGHHHHH

KAREN: You missed your nail appointment

KENNY: Shiiiit that was today?

KAREN: You still owe me the money for it

KENNY: … KENNY: Karen, we don't have money, we’re poor

KAREN: Get a job

KENNY: …I do have a job

KAREN: Okay so then you have money?

KENNY: No

KAREN: That doesn't make sense

KENNY: Anyways- KENNY: You alive?

KAREN: Clearly

KENNY: Okay cool KENNY: So uh KENNY: There's demons around, I hope they find you and kill you and you die bye

KAREN: …What?

KAREN: Tricia do you know what the fuck he’s talking about?

TRICIA: No

TRICIA: Also stop calling on speakerphone

TRICIA: You remind me of my brother (derogatorily)

TRICIA: …

TRICIA: WHY DO I KEEP DOING THAT!?!??!

TRICIA: UGHHH

TRICIA: I’m gonna go yell at my brother by cursing me into the influencer gene pool

TRICIA: You wanna come?

KAREN: If I get to yell at someone, of course

TRICIA: Be-

TRICIA: …

TRICIA: I'm not even gonna say that

CRAIG: Who the fuck where you talking to

CRAIG: I feel like they were talking shit smh my head

KENNY: Oh just my bitch sister and your bitch sister

KENNY: Told her she was gonna die soon

CRAIG: LMAOOOO I’m dead 💀💀💀

KENNY: Lol it was funny she was so mad

TOLKIEN: I swear to god you guys are the same person sometimes

CRAIG: Smh my head no literally untrue

KENNY: Common Tolkien L

TOLKIEN: I want you both dead

CRAIG: …

KENNY: …

TRICIA: Okay where tf is blud

TRICIA: I'm gonna kill his ass

KAREN: Ugh

KAREN: He probably set up Kenny to fucking prank us

KAREN: Going to yell at them both when we find them

TRICIA: For real

TRICIA: Smh my fucking head

TRICIA: OH MY GOD CAN I STOP DOING THAT!?!?

KAREN: There's his door

KAREN: Should I kick it down?

TRICIA: No he will literally kill me

TRICIA: Instead we’re gonna go in his room

TRICIA: Steal all his shit

TRICIA: And fucking burn it

KAREN: Ohh yay! Property damage! My favorite!

TRICIA: Shhh shhh shhhh

TRICIA: Stfu

TRICIA: He’ll hear us

KAREN: No

KAREN: You're not the boss of me

TRICIA: Okay

TRICIA: On three

TRICIA: One- Two-

KAREN: THREE

KAREN: Ew it's so dark in here

KAREN: It smells like fucking Ccool Ranch Doritos in here

TRICIA: Shut the fuck up

TRICIA: He’s gonna hear you

TRICIA: I know where he keeps his Supreme hoodies

TRICIA: HOOOOOLY SHIT IS THAT A DEAD BODY!??!?!?!?

KAREN: AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

KAREN: WE ARE GONNA DIE

KAREN: GET THE MANAGER!!

TRICIA: SHUT THE FUCK UP THE KILLER COULD STILL BE HERE YOU QUEERMO

GREGORY AND ESTELLA: Shhhhh he eepy

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

TRICIA: …

KAREN: …

KAREN AND TRICIA: AAAAAAAAAAA-

TRICIA: Okay

TRICIA: HAILLLL NAWHHHHH

KAREN: I’m calling the police

TRICIA: That is the smartest thing you could ever do

KAREN: Hello? 911?

KAREN: Hi yeah, there's some queers in our house

KAREN: Please come

KAREN: Bye

(Edits made by @pissblanket and @cattpup5)

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south-park-polls · 2 months

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South Park Song Tournament!

[also check out @votemattrey’s South Park 25th anniversary concert tournament on their blog!! <3]

I am aware the creators made an official song tournament, but i didn’t hear about it until after it was already over so I have decided to make one of my own!

This is very self-indulgent and there are a lot of south park songs to think of, especially if you include covers (which i have decided to do) so I am likely very biased in which songs i have chosen.

I have narrowed it down to 128 songs to start to give an easy number for a tournament, but if I haven’t included your favourite song feel free let me know in the notes, reblogs or tags and I will make sure to add it to the list.

Please don’t worry about whether requesting songs will interfere with the tournament numbers! I have plans to give second chances to the closest losers to ensure that there is never an odd number of songs going into the next round :)

The songs I have decided to put in the tournament are as follows:

South Park Theme Song

I'm Gonna Make Love to You, Woman - Cartman Gets an Anal Probe

Hot Lava - Volcano

Love Gravy - An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig

Make Love, Even When I'm Dead - Pinkeye

The Lonely Jew on Christmas - Mr Hankey the Christmas Poo

Waitin' On a Woman - Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut

Simultaneous - Summer Sucks

Chocolate Salty Balls - Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls

Cheesy Poofs Theme Song - Roger Ebert Should Lay Off the Fatty Foods

Underpants Gnomes Work Song - Gnomes

Getting Gay With Kids - Rainforest Schmainforest

I Hate You Guys - Jakovasaurs

Sexual Harassment Panda - Sexual Harassment Panda

Shelly, Shelly - Cat Orgy

Turds! - Cat Orgy

Mr Hankey the Christmas Poo - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

Carol of the Bells - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

Christmas Medley - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

O Tannenbaum - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

Christmas Time in Hell - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

I Saw Three Ships - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

Merry Fucking Christmas - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

O Holy Night - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics

Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld - Timmy 2000

Fingerbang - Something You Can Do With Your Finger

Wendy's Audition Song - Something You Can Do With Your Finger

Third Grade Memories - Fourth Grade

The Prostitute Song - Fat Camp

Circle of Poo - A Very Crappy Christmas

Why Can't I Be Like All the Other Kids - Here Comes the Neighbourhood

It's Butters! - Butters' Very Own Episode

Montage - Asspen

Sea People and Me - The Simpsons Already Did It

The Ballad of Lemmiwinks - The Death Camp of Tolerance

My Future Self n Me - My Future Self n Me

Poo-Choo Train - Red Sleigh Down

Bleeding Heart Rock Protest Song vs. Pro War Country Song - I'm a Little Bit Country

Make a Run for the Border - Fat Butt and Pancake Head

Taco Flavoured Kisses - Fat Butt and Pancake Head

Jesus Baby - Christian Rock Hard

Faith + 1 Album - Christian Rock Hard

Casa Bonita - Casa Bonita

Joseph Smith Was Called a Prophet - All About Mormon

Cigarettes All Hidey Lidey Day - Butt Out

Follow the Only Road - It's Christmas in Canada

French Canada - It's Christmas in Canada

Let's Fighting Love - Good Times with Weapons

My Robot Friend - AWESOM-O

My Wishing Tree - The Jeffersons

The Future Begins With You and Me - Goobacks

Vote or Die! - Douche and Turd

I've Got Some Apples - Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset

Christmas Time is Once a Year - Woodland Critter Christmas

Make It Right - The Death of Eric Cartman

Love Lost Long Ago - Follow That Egg!

We Can Live Together - Ginger Kids

Trapped in the Closet - Trapped in the Closet

Hey People, You Gotta Drive Hybrids Already - Smug Alert!

Who's Got the Greatest Mom In The World? - Tsst

Dawg's Crew Theme Song - Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy

Hippitus Hoppitus - Fantastic Easter Special

California Loves the Homeless - Night of the Living Homeless

I've Got a Golden Ticket - Le Petit Tourette

Imagination Song - Imaginationland

Canada on Strike - Canada on Strike

My Internet Done Up and Went Away - Over Logging

Super Fun Time - Super Fun Time

You Gotta Do What You Wanna Do - Elementary School Musical

Burn Down Hot Topic - The Ungroundable

I've Got a Ring on My Finger - The Ring

Queef Free - Eat, Pray, Queef

Gay Fish - Fishsticks

Somalian Pirates We - Fatbeard

Poker Face - Whale Whores

Minorities at my Water Park - Pee

Lake Tardicaca Hula Gal - Crippled Summer

You and Cthulhu - Mysterion Rises

Cafeteria Fraiche - Crème Fraiche

Vunter Slaush Kapushkuh - Crack Baby Athletic Association

Work Mexican Work - The Last of the Meheecans

Lemmiwinks vs Wikileaks - Bass to Mouth

Put That Heart to Work - Broadway Bro Down

Out of My Shell - Broadway Bro Down

I'm Not the Poorest Kid in School - The Poor Kid

The Jewelry Polka - Cash For Gold

Make Bullying Kill Itself - Butterballs

Jackin' it in San Diego - Butterballs

I Swear - Cartman Finds Love

The Ballad of James Cameron - Raising the Bar

It's a Beautiful Day - World War Zimmerman

A Chorus of Wieners - A Song of Ass and Fire

Princess Kenny Theme - A Song of Ass and Fire

My Bitch Ain't No Hobbit - The Hobbit

Push (Feeling Good on a Wednesday) - The Cissy

The Tale of Craig's Mom's Bush - The Magic Bush

PC Chant - Stunning and Brave

Where Has My Country Gone - Where My Country Gone

The Yelper Special (Boogers and Cum) - You're Not Yelping

In My Safe Space - Safe Space

The Ballad of Tweek and Craig - Tweek x Craig

Let's Come Together As a School - Douche and a Danish

Give Life A Try - Put It Down

Put It Down - Put It Down

They Got Me Locked Up In Here - Hummels & Heroin

Barbershop Quartet - Hummels & Heroin

A Witch Pursuit Thing - Sons A Witches

Faith In Christ - A Boy And A Priest

Unfulfilled - Unfulfilled

Colorado Town - Bike Parade

Go Strong Woman, Go - Board Girls

I Love You Social Distancing - The Pandemic Special

Mountain Town - South Park: Biggger, Longer & Uncut

Uncle Fucka - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

It's Easy Mmkay - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

Blame Canada - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

Kyle's Mom's a Bitch - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

What Would Brian Boitano Do - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

Up There - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

La Resistance - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

I Can Change - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

I'm Super - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

Mountain Town (Reprise) - South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

We Are Living in the Future - South Park: Post Covid: The Return of Covid

We Missed You Randy - South Park: The Streaming Wars

I Got Cred, Bitches - South Park (Not Suitable For Children)

Hope you all enjoy the tournament and may the best south park song win!

#south park #south park songs #trey parker #matt stone #trey parker and matt stone #sp fandom

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tulip-tune · 6 months

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They should have brought into Mysterion’s episodes that Cartman remembers when Kenny dies

Like in the episode where he buys the amusement park, he talks about how Kenny dies all the time. (there’s probably other times I don’t remember)

Maybe after Kenny escaped the underworld or whatever Cartman could have said something, idk

🤷🤷

#idk #sounds like it could have been interesting to see #south park #cartman #Kenny #would’ve been sad maybe

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littlewriter19 · 4 years

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youtube

South Park- Phil Collins

#south park #cartoon #phil collins #funny #timmy and the lords of the underworld #comedy #eric cartman #throwback #stan marsh

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rad-ishy · 2 years

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Got bored and decided that it was the perfect time to start my South Park Camp Half-Blood AU

(I’m going to conveniently forget that all children of Athena have blonde hair and grey eyes for this!) Stan Marsh; Son of Aphrodite

I was originally stuck between Apollo, Hecate, and Aphrodite for him, but ended up settling of Aphrodite, because idk he just seems like a romantic to me, he always cared about his relationship with Wendy, and it just made sense to me idk

(Aphrodite is the goddess of love, lust, beauty, pleasure, passion and procreation)

Kyle Broflovski; Son of Athena

This one is easier to explain, Kyle is shown time and time again to be the smartest and most logical of the main four boys, so it was only right for him to be a son of the goddess of wisdom

(Athena is the goddess of wisdom, handicraft, and warfare)

Kenny McCormick; Son of Hades

“Oh my God, they killed Kenny!” is probably what Hades says every time he has to bring his son back to life. Hades is the god of the underworld, Kenny dies a lot, perfect father son relationship

(Hades is the god of the dead and the underworld. King of the Underworld)

Eric Cartman; Son of Ares

Eric is an asshole, he’s probably even seen as an asshole among the other Ares kids. I bet you he’s Ares’ favorite tho

(Ares is the god of courage and war)

Leopold “Butters” Stotch; Son of Persephone

I just thought it would be cute tbh, plus I think it matches his personality

(Persephone is the goddess of spring, life, death, grain, and destruction. She is also the Queen of the Underworld)

Craig Tucker; Son of Hecate

Space makes me think of magic and Craig is a space nerd, plus I think he just totally wouldn’t give a fuck that he has such a badass mom

(Hecate is the goddess of boundaries, crossroads, witchcraft, and ghosts)

Tweek Tweak; Son of Demeter

Tweek sitting in a wheat field cause yes. Also I like to think that Demeter has a rather calm personality and Tweek is just the opposite of that lol

(Demeter is the goddess of harvest, agriculture, fertility, an sacred law)

Clyde Donovan; Son of Hermes

I couldn’t really come up with one for Clyde, but Hermes covers so much stuff that I just felt that it fit. Also Clyde definitely takes after the Stolls

(Hermes is the god of boundaries, roads, travelers, thieves, athletes, shepherds, commerce, speed, cunning, wit, and sleep)

Token Black; Son of Pontus

I wanna see Token controlling water like a badass, but I didn’t wanna give him Poseidon cause it felt too basic

(Pontus is the primordial god of the sea)

Jimmy Valmer; Son of Agon

This is purely because of the episode where he uses steroids for the special olympics, mans is wild

(Agon is the spirit of conflict, struggle, or contest)

Scott Malkinson; Son of Philotes

Cause the way he acted towards Sophie in Basic Cable gave me that vibe

(Philotes is the goddess of affection, friendship, and sex)

Bebe Stevens; Daughter of Aphrodite

She’s pretty and perfect, also she’d have to be Stan’s half sister lol

(Aphrodite is the goddess of love, lust, beauty, pleasure, passion and procreation)

Wendy Testaburger; Daughter of Athena

She’s just that smart, plus she’d be Kyle’s half sister lmao

(Athena is the goddess of wisdom, handicraft, and warfare)

Sophie Grey; Daughter of Nike

I really don’t have an explanation for this one, I’m sorry

(Nike is the goddess of victory)

Red McArthur; Daughter of Enyo

Red just seems confrontational, but I didn’t wanna give her Ares

(Enyo is the goddess of war)

Heidi Turner; Daughter of Eleos

Heidi must’ve had some heart of pure fucking gold to put up with Cartman

(Eleos is the spirit of pity, mercy, clemency, and compassion)

Nichole Daniels; Daughter of Hebe

I just felt like it fit cause Nichole is beautiful

(Hebe is the goddess of youth)

(can you tell I ship Bunny by who I gave Butters and Kenny???)

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kymanweek · 4 years

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WELCOME BACK TO OUR THIRD ANNUAL EDITION OF KYMAN WEEK!

Kyman week is an appreciation event for every kyman shipper out there that takes place between 1st to 7th of July.

Previously we had in this event 7 prompts — one for each day, but this edition will be very special because we’re having 13 prompts for the entire week! That means 2 prompts to choose between per day! Those two prompts are based in two running themes alongside the other: Alternative Universes and Fanfic Tropes. They aren’t obligatory to use together as they are independent prompts, but if you want to combine them please feel free to do so!

The shippers can create any form of fanwork based on their interpretation of the prompts, it can be edits, fanfic, cosplay, fanart… anything! Creativity is the key!

The intent is to share your love for the ship and to have fun of course, even the fans who don’t participate will be able to enjoy the new content, everybody wins (˘⌣˘ ) ♡

The works will be reblogged on this blog for each one of the days and at the end everyone that did something will be on a thank you post linking to their blogs with special attention to the ones that did something for all of the days! We also have a special gift for those who complete all the days.

To participate you just have to post your work with the theme of the corresponding day and mention this blog or use the #kymanweek tag so it’s easy to find it.

Here are the descriptions of the prompts, under the read more cut.

Day 1: High School AU / Token’s Party

The boys are getting older and are now in high school! What kind of adventures will they get into there?

It’s time to attend one of Token’s amazing house parties! Will Cartman and Kyle enjoy their night or will things get out of hand?

Day 2: Adult Life / Sharing the Bed

Inevitably, the boys enter adulthood. But what becomes of Cartman and Kyle's relationship now? Will they succeed in life or crumble under the pressure of adulthood?

It’s a cliche as old as time; what if Cartman and Kyle had to share the same bed? How did they get there, and what does this lead to?

Day 3: Office AU / Locked in a Closet

Due to unforeseen circumstances, Kyle and Cartman have somehow ended up in the same office. Is this a recipe for disaster, or could them working together lead to something extraordinary?

The two enemies are inside one locked closet. You decide their outcome.

Day 4: Mafia AU / Secret Dating

Fancy costumes, dirty money, revenge and gang fights - the criminal underworld is a far cry from the mountain town we’re familiar with. What awaits Cartman and Kyle in this murky, shady business? Will they be sworn enemies or unexpected allies?

Cartman and Kyle are finally in a relationship! There’s one major problem though - it’s anything but official. How did they end up in this mess to begin with?

Day 5: Fantasy AU / Soulmates

Abnormal things happen in South Park all the time. However, a world where magic and the supernatural is commonplace is a whole other problem! What destiny awaits the two boys there?

Cartman and Kyle are meant for each other - they just don’t know about it yet. But when are they going to realize it, and what happens after that?

Day 6: Apocalypse AU / First Kiss

As the end of the world draws near, the boys find themselves in an urgent situation of life and death. Will this finally make them cooperate or is their rivalry going to ruin their only chance of survival?

At last, Kyle and Cartman share their first kiss. How did this happen?! Give us your representation of the moment!

Day 7: Free Day

It’s the final day of the week! Was there something you felt like you couldn’t include in the prompts you wanted to do? Now is the time to show it.

__________

Organizers:

@jmgirl100

@ssoletluna

@l-l-loser

@fandomdise

For any questions the ask box is always open! ♡

#kymanweek #kymanweek2020 #south park #kyman #eric cartman #kyle broflovski #cartman #kyman week #kyman week 2020

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shin-holly · 6 years

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Reaper! AU headcannons

Cartman (the reaper, or god of death or whatever)

His cruel and childish temperament come from years and years of isolation. Since everything he touches dies, the people of the underworld tend to stay away from him. The only real contact he gets with people is when he's about to take their souls away, and that's never usually positive

Gloves can block his powers for some reason, and that's the only way he can touch other people. It was Kyle who helped him find this out

Speaking of Kyle, the only reason the two met while Kyle was still alive was because Cartman was too damn impatient to nab another soul.

He's easily bribed by food, especially KFC. This keeps Kyle alive.

Cartman's proud of the job he does. It's the job he's been stuck with for years, so why knock it.

Cartman can't change forms, so he'll stay looking like an 18 year old forever. It's kind of sad when you think about how Kyle will grow up even when he won't.

Cartman's powers include the touch of death, flight (or hovering), manipulation of space (he can hide just about anything in his sleeves and pockets) and invisibility.

Kyle (The poor unsuspecting human who didn't sign up for this shit)

Kyle is set up to be killed by an 'unforeseen circumstance'

He's a student who lives in his own flat right outside South Park

He has chunks of his memory missing and can't remember much of his childhood. This is because of a tragic incident that caused him to unconsciously suppress the memories.

A calm motherfucker who can look death himself in the eye and tell him to fuck off (after being promised his life will be speared.)

He treats Cartman like an annoying friend or younger brother at first, since all Cartman likes to do is loiter about and teasingly threaten him, but learns to like Cartman and eventually becomes closer to him.

Stan

Kyle's appointed guardian angel.

Seems to have some sort of past with Kyle, and has a crush on him.

He remembers Cartman from when he died, but it appears that Cartman has forgotten, or stopped caring.

Treats Cartman as the enemy and is constantly trying to get rid of him, worried that Cartman might change his mind and kill Kyle

He's a serious kind of guy, but is also pretty compassionate.

Outside being Kyle's guardian angel, he tries to do his best for all humans, even if they can't see him.

Stan's abilities are flight, healing, telepathy, and invisibility

Kenny

Another angel, but he's too laid back to be much use, he's basically Stan's wingman! Ayyyy!

Also seems to have a past with Kyle, but doesn't seem too intent on having the redhead remember.

Kenny can actually change back and forth from being an angel and being human.

Eventually he falls for a human, just like Cartman (I'll leave figuring that out to your imagination!)

He's good friends with Kyle and Stan, and seems to be one of the only angels that gets on well with Cartman

Still the perv we know and love.

Other than his ability to change between species, he has the same abilities as Stan

What do y'all think so far? I'm trying to come up with a plot! :)

#Reaper! AU #South Park AU #Kyman #Kyle #Cartman #Stan #Kenny #The boys #South Park

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codarpy · 7 years

Text

South Park 21x05

•Spooky Halloween Episode!

•Fuck off Gerald

•Isn’t “I Want Candy” from that Easter movie though?

•No joke, I totally wanna go to Randy’s party

•Eric calling Heidi “sweetheart”

•OMG Heidi’s adorable!

•Fucking Gerald...

•Oh Jesus I forgot about Heidi’s super jacked up dad...

•This is the best thing I’ve seen coming out of these men..

•Don’t fuck up the mood, random guy, by adding witchcraft.

•Of course it’s from Salem

•You all fucking already know the fucking devil! He was in a gay relationship with Sadam Hussein

•Aaand here goes the magic...

•Watching all these people burn really gets me into the Halloween spirit. I’m being totally serious.

•I want there to be at least 1 IT reference... just because.

•Kidnapped some children, that’s enough of a reference for me. I’m good.

•I love how, overall, Sharon was very nonchalant about the fact a man blew people up.

•Eric’s Kubrick Stare!

•Children going to fuck up the monster.

•Nods to Salem Witch Trial

•We all know Cartman is talking about Heidi

•I typed that way too fast...

•Kyle defending Heidi!

•Witch hunts... this whole episode is about witch hunts on multiple platforms...

•Fucking Gerald...

•Is this episode also an allude to clowns not getting good work because Pennywise has scared people into thinking clowns steal children... or am I looking too much into this?

•Randy is me, but on another note, who is asking for these Randy episodes?

•Eric’s gonna fucking obliterate her... please stall him Heidi.

•Goddamn Mr. Garrison... I can’t decide whether I love or hate him.

•Everyone shitting on Chip Duncan

•This is not the lowest of Cartman. He killed someone’s parents and fed them to their son, he raised Cthulhu from the underworld. I love Heidi and the situation is awful, but this is not the lowest Cartman has ever sank.

•Detective Yates talking directly to the audience about victim shaming!

•Witch hunts. They’re Called dicing Witch hunts for gods sake! What can tv not say that?

•Those are straight up Deadlights don’t even try to tell me any different.

•Fuck it up Garrison!

•These episodes always go by so fast.

#South Park #eric cartman #kyle broflovski #stan marsh #kenny mccormick #South Park episode #trey Parker #Matt stone #Randy Marsh

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underworld-park-offical · 2 months

Text

GREGORY: Well! That was incredibly draining.

ESTELLA: Oh don’t you even start, young man!

ESTELLA: You barely did a thing!

GREGORY: Oh I HELPED!!!

ESTELLA: When I ASKED!!!

ESTELLA: You were more concerned with playing Papa’s Cupcakeria!

GREGORY: That game is really fun, okay?!

ESTELLA: Whatever, what shall we do now?

GREGORY: …Play Papa’s Cupcakeria together?

ESTELLA: No thank you.

ESTELLA: I do not mean to offend, but If I hear that game’s soundtrack one more time I will throw that computer.

GREGORY: Hmmm…

GREGORY: I know!

GREGORY: We could play Kiss, Marry, Kill!

ESTELLA: GREGORY!!!

ESTELLA: NO!!!! ESTELLA: That game is lewd, violent, and inappropriate!

ESTELLA: Who would we even be kissing, marrying, and killing in these scenarios???

GREGORY: Why, the humans, of course!

ESTELLA: Absolutely not.

GREGORY: Awww! Pleeeease??

ESTELLA: Gregory. Bellarose.

GREGORY: Pretty please?

ESTELLA: Gregory. Wolfgang. Bellarose.

GREGORY: What if I said pretty please with a cherry on top covered in a banana sundae?

ESTELLA: …

ESTELLA: I do like banana sundaes…

GREGORY: Wonderful!!!

GREGORY: Starting off strongly, Craig.

GREGORY: Can we agree to kill this one?

ESTELLA: As a pacifist, I firmly believe others do not deserve death…

ESTELLA: ….

ESTEALLA: However

ESTELLA: He has gone through great lengths to ensure your internet extravaganza is as unenjoyable as possible, so I agree.

ESTELLA: Put the boy in the Pear Wiggler.

GREGORY: I did not expect that, being honest…

ESTELLA: No.

ESTELLA: Kill this one too.

GREGORY: Estella! I am surprised at you!

ESTELLA: I had to be in. That INCELS body. For three. Hours.

ESTELLA: I could not bathe.

ESTELLA: The body was constantly SHITTING itself.

ESTELLA: And he smelt of doritos and body odor.

ESTELLA: I think my choice is justified.

GREGORY: Okay queen, that was actually really slay of you! Go off!

GREGORY: I think his little ex is more tolerable, though!

ESTELLA: I hate to be mean, but he was right to break up with him.

GREGORY: Exactly! Those nasty ass hands…

ESTELLA: Please don't remind me…

ESTELLA: Now, I wouldn't marry Tolkien, but a smooch wouldn't hurt anyone.

GREGORY: For what he did to Clyde I'd get down on my knees and start throwing rings at him.

ESTELLA: I thought you liked that Stanley boy?

GREGORY: Mmmm…

GREGORY: Reconsidering my options….

ESTELLA: Oh dear, why so?

GREGORY: HE WON’T SMOOCH ME!!!!

ESTELLA: That is his loss then! You are a wonderful boy, Gregory. You deserve better.

GREGORY: Estella you don't get it.

GREGORY: Dad bods and pathetic men are my weakness.

ESTELLA: Gregory…. Raise your standards for your own sake…

GREGORY: If my standards went any higher, I'd be single for life.

ESTELLA: Fair enough, I suppose…

GREGORY: WHY WON'T YOU SMOOCH ME WHY WON'T YOU SMOOCH ME WHY WON'T YOU SMOOCH ME!!!???

ESTELLA: He may not like men, dear….

GREGORY: HOMOPHOBIA!!! HE IS HOMOPHOBIC!!!!! HE DOESN'T WANT TO KISS ME AND THAT MAKES HIM A HOMOPHOBE!!!!

ESTELLA: I suppose I'm killing this one too…

GREGORY: I'm forcing him into marriage. He. Will. Kiss. Me.

ESTELLA: Gregory, calm down.

ESTELLA: You're here, I need you here.

GREGORY: Sorry… sorry…

GREGORY: Oh Dear look at that one…

GREGORY: Green is NOT his color…

ESTELLA: Don't be rude! You can not bully him!

GREGORY: What? It's not bullying! It's an astute observation! He's a ginger! Gingers don't look good in lime green! It's constructive criticism!!!

GREGORY: Oughh… I think I'm going to have to kill him…

ESTELLA: GREGORY!!!

ESTELLA: (Sigh)

ESTELLA: I for one, think he's a nice boy, and will give him a little smooch, as a treat.

GREGORY: Erm… which one's this again?

ESTELLA: Oh I'm afraid I don't know.

GREGORY: Is he new or something?

ESTELLA; Oh no no no! I think he's the blue haired Fellow!

ESTELLA: TrollyHomme was his name, right?

GREGORY: Hell-

ESTELLA: Language

GREGORY: -If I know

ESTELLA: Hmmmm….

GREGORY: Kill?

ESTELLA: Kill?

GREGORY: Kill.

ESTELLA: Mhm.

GREGORY: Hmmm, I'm not sure about this one?

GREGORY: I think this will be the first one I kiss.

GREGORY: That country accent weakens me.

ESTELLA: What accent he speaks in mumbles.

GREGORY: You can hear it sometimes!!!

ESTELLA: No you cannot.

GREGORY: How can you not?? It's so obvious!

ESTELLA: I have no comment on this one. He smells of metal, which concerns me.

GREGORY: Why? He could just be a mechanic?

ESTELLA: Or a murdering robot.

GREGORY: Oh please! They haven't been active in centuries, we'll live.

(edits made by @pissblanket)

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galactic-tragedy · 5 years

Text

One of the South Park Ship kids

The idea of ship kids seem to be popular all of a sudden. Why don’t I introduce my Creek ship kid to ya all.

Luna Tucker:

Age: 10

Gender: Cis female

Sexuality: Bisexual

Partner: Bunny McCormick

Parents: Tweek Tweak and Craig Tucker

Sibling(s): Unknown

Friends: Bunny McCormick, Tessa Black, Erin Cartman, Pandora Marsh, Benji Testaburger, Damon Thorn, Nathan Daniels, and Kimmy Valmer

Birthday: October 9

Nickname(s): Lu, Other nicknames are currently unknown

Appearance: Short blonde hair dyed black at the tips. Wearing Craig's old peruvian hat along with a blue and green letterman jacket. Ripped black jeans with black combat boots. Pale skin littered with a few freckles, a button nose, and light blue eyes.

Personality: Usually hides her emotions when she first meets someone, keeps up the whole 'I don't care' act, will probably break down in front of you one day. Can get annoyed extremely quick depending on who you are.

Religion: Atheist, possibly pagan

Alias: Lunar Eclipse (The Fractured But Whole), Rogue Thief Star (Stick of Truth)

Enemies: Teachers.

Likes: Guinea pigs, birds, animals in general, being alone (sometimes), finding some way to cause trouble.

Dislikes: School, teachers, getting in trouble over the stupidest things.

Music Playlist:

Outrunning Karma - Alec Benjamin

Wires - The Neighborhood

Everybody Gets High - MISSIO

Runaway (U & I) - Galantis

Sober Up - AJR

Background info:

Luna is never really a great child. She's learned how to get on her parents' nerves along with how to get out of trouble. It's honestly hilarious watching her try to get out of trouble with her dads, since by now they know all her tricks. Luna takes after Craig when it comes to her emotions, hiding them away from people. Though, at times she will break down and let them take over which is usually at home when Tweek is home. Ranting about things to him helps her a lot when it comes to that. She used to smoke occasionally, until Bunny showed her how she can sneak out to smoke. She does sneak out with her girlfriend to smoke and watch the stars. Tessa told her parents. It is unknown if she's actually grounded or not, since Tweek and Craig haven't explicitly said she is. Teachers at school usually say she's just like her father (Craig) when he was in school. The blonde often gets into fights with other students, resulting in either her only reasonable friend, a teacher, or even Bunny having to step in to stop the fight. Anyways, even if Luna is a trouble child she's learned a lot of things and tries to better herself for anyone who knows her.

Older Design:

Newest Design (SP Avatar Maker):

Rogue Thief Star:

Age: 10

Race: Drow Elf

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Bisexual

Class: Barbarian Thief

Parents: Barbarian Tweek and Feldspar the Thief

Allies: Unknown

Kingdom: She's a rogue, she isn't loyal to anyone.

Status: Unknown

Appearance: Short blonde hair dyed black at the tips, pale skin littered with a few freckles, a button nose, and light blue eyes. Wearing Craig's old feldspar cape along with a sort of binding around her chest, jeans, and boots. Black stripes inspired by Tweek's character are painted on her body.

Personality: Calm most of the time, doesn't exactly care about certain things, doesn't trust easily.

Religion: Pagan

Alias: Luna Tucker

Enemies: Unknown

Playlist:

Rocket Ships - Cavetown

Just Hold On - Louis Tomlinson, Steve Aoki

Don't You Dare Forget the Sun - Get Scared

Shelter - Porter Robinson

Sick Boy - The Chainsmokers

Background info:

Rogue Thief Star was exiled from Kupa Keep once they found out she was a Drow Elf. How did she hide it, you may ask? Well, when this little thief was born with human like ears. As she grew up, however, her ears started forming into an elven like shape. The Wizard Queen had called for her exile, her own parents unable to join her. Now, she is roaming the Forest of the Underworld looking for a fight. The king of the forest had invited her to join him, but she declined wanting to live in the world alone. Who knows what kinds of trouble she could get into.

(Picture will be added as soon as it’s done.)

Lunar Eclipse:

Age: Personal info can't be distributed!

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Bi

Class: Elementalist/Brutalist

Parents: Wonder Tweek and Super Craig

Team: The Rulers of the Night

Kryptonite: Adults

Appearance: Wears a black cloak with hood over her head, a mask that covers half her face (eyes), black leggings, black boots. There's glitter that looks like stars near the bottom of the cloak, she thought it was a great idea at the time.

Personality: Self-esteem is probably too high, she's brave when it comes to being Lunar Eclipse

Religion: Pagan

Alias: Luna Tucker

Enemies: Freedom Pals, Coon and Friends

Playlist:

Partners in Crime - Set it Off

Little Lion Man - Mumford & Sons

The Nights - AVICII

The Devil Within - Digital Daggers

Entropy - Sim Gretina Remix

Background info:

Lunar Eclipse is the villainous persona of Luna Tucker. She had turned to a life of crime once she realized that if she wanted to take things a little too far, she had to keep her real identity a secret. She recruited her friends and they formed the team of villains called The Rulers of the Night. After a few weeks or so of the team of villains going around doing crimes, both The Freedom Pals and Coon and Friends had finally caught on. They've been trying to stop them, but to no avail.

(Picture will be added as soon as it’s finished.)

#ship kids #creek #creek ship kid #Luna Tucker #Idk #My child TwT

0 notes

southparkhighrpg · 6 years

Text

Damien Thorne - Accepted

Congratulations, Apollo! Welcome to South Park High! Remember to send us your account within 48 hours of acceptance! If you ever need time extension to make the account, message the mods.

1. Mun information

Preferred Name: Apollo

Age: 26

Pronouns: he/him

Timezone: Central US

Activity Level(Scale 1-10): 6-7

Discord:

Password: Ericccc Cartman isss a fatass.

2. Muse Information

Muse’s name: Damien Thorn.

Age: 17

Birthday: He doesn’t know his exact birthdate, but usually celebrates it in December or July. When he celebrates it in December, he does so to annoy others who are trying to get into the winter holidays spirit, to have to share the month with the birth of the son of Satan himself.

Height: 6’2”

Sexuality: Bisexual/Biromantic

Gender/Pronouns: he/him.

3. Personality (two paragraph)

As a child, Damien was known for his brash behavior; cynical and with a chip on his shoulder already, he was, at the end of the day, horribly jealous of the other kids in the class: they got to -be- kids as far as he could tell from the outside. In the rare occasion that his father, Satan himself, allowed Damien to go up to Earth, he would always limit his only son’s travels to South Park: a small mountain town that was just strange enough that Satan felt like Damien wouldn’t stick out too much, just as long as he kept a handle on his temper.

Sixth grade was the first time that Damien was allowed to attend nearly every day of school on Earth, unlike before when he was usually homeschooled by a different group of poor souls each day, these souls were hand picked by his father.

Now, at seventeen, Damien is very much still the temperamental boy he once was, but, to the relief of his father’s subjects and all around him, also a whole lot more mature and careful.

The biggest surprise of all, though, was that the time on Earth had, slowly, throughout the past couple of years, broadened his sense of compassion for others and, at times, himself. Working at an animal sanctuary on and off since he was fifteen had a lot to do with it. Damien is still learning to detect social cues to the best of his ability, but, at the end of the day, prefers to be alone.

Quick witted with a dark sense of humor, the chip on his shoulder hasn’t faded much at all, in fact, in some ways, it’s gotten deeper- he’s not a stranger to picking fights, no matter how petty-, but he’s learning, slowly but noticeably to some, what it means to be a friend…. sometimes.

4. Appearance (two paragraph)

When Damien was first born, his hair was the color of wheat; a neutral blond, but, after being mistaken as a cherub being allowed a once in a lifetime visit to Hell, what with the natural curl he had at the time, Satan used his unlimited powers while in his Lair and Damien’s hair after that forever grew in as near the darkest shade of black;when this did nothing at all to change the public’s perception of the infant with the rosy cheeks, Satan had made the points of Damien’s ears more prominent and made it so that the little horns atop baby Damien’s head poked out from his head of curls (curls that have since straightened out to slight waves). As an infant, when he was closing his eyes, sleeping, Satan’s subjects couldn’t see that his eyes weren’t always a warm brown as a cherub’s might be: sometimes they flickered red and violet, like little stars. Damien’s eyes still do this, but more so in the light, leading him to wear sunglasses while outdoors, and, sometimes, tinted glasses at school, when around people who may raise questions: when they did ask, it paid to be seen as Alternative, he could play it off as wearing some sort of unheard of high tech contact lenses.

Now, at seventeen, Damien usually keeps his hair long: sometimes down, sometimes pulled back into a bun or ponytail. He is able to will his horns to disappear while in public, because even the son of Satan himself doesn’t exactly want to embarrass himself in public and have everyone think he’s wearing some sort of Halloween headpiece all year round. While he usually wears little to no makeup at all, sometimes he will pack on the eyeliner and black or brown eyeshadow. Nude, jet black, or deep red lipsticks, too, but very rarely.

Style wise, Damien loves to add historical twists to his outfits, little nods to the 17th and 18th centuries in particular, but usually ends up in black jeans, black chunky boots or dress shoes, and some kind of stylish t-shirt or baggy hoodie. Damien’s ears are pierced three times on the left, and twice on the right. One of his ears are noticeably pointed, while the other has an indent right under the tallest part of the point (a scar he got from a fight with a hellhound at the age of fifteen).

7. Name at least 5 headcanons

-Damien had been kept at the age of ten for hundreds of years, both mentally and visually; Satan wanted to protect Damien from everything that went on outside of the gates of Hell, where he wouldn’t have complete control and influence, until, one day, Damien had convinced him to allow him just one day outside. Damien was then, eventually, allowed to age along with his peers. Eternally ten year old Damien had expected growing up to be a lot easier than it would turn out to be. This, coming from a kid who once laughed in the faces of newly arrived subjects who told him of the struggles they had waded through while living. Karma was really biting him back hard.

-As a result of the shock of beginning to see different perspectives, Damien had a difficult time in middle school. From the sixth through the ninth grade, Damien was unusually quiet; teachers didn’t know what to make of him; he would hardly ever look up from his notebook, tuned those around him out, and never raised his hand, and, yet, did exceptionally well on in class pop quizzes… that is, until he began to do poorly in school near the middle of the ninth grade and onward.

-Damien loves music, but lacks the patience to play any instruments.

- Despite growing up in an intensely hot climate, Damien isn’t bothered by the cold winters of South Park; in fact, he had to learn to wear a coat and gloves just so that he wouldn’t worry others.

- Gym class is where Damien has always excelled and, up until this day, he’s been allowed to use the gym after school hours any time he wants, even during the summer, just to get some of his endless pent up energy out: only rules being that, anything he inevitably breaks, he has to fix or buy.

- Damien’s issues with temper have had him theoretically suspended from school umpteen times, but, because of his father’s influence and threats to the system, he’s only ever actually missed a day or two here and there due to the detentions. This embarrasses Damien, though; he never asks Satan to intervene, but Satan is nosy and always finds out about the detentions somehow.

8. Write two decent sized paragraphs that shows how you would portray your muse

Drumming his pencil on the top of his desk, Damien was deep in thought, without a clue in the world that the teacher had stopped the lesson and everyone aside from one or two of the other students, who were too afraid to give him a look, were staring right at him. It took the student sitting behind him kicking at the legs of his chair to snap him out of it. Looking down at his hand that wasn’t fidgeting with the pencil, but, instead, resting atop the desk, he realized he had managed to melt the beginnings of a hand print into the manila yellow colored hard plastic. He needed to cool off.

Excusing himself from the classroom, he pressed his back against one of the cool metal lockers lining the hall and sunk down until he was sitting on the ground, back still against the locker. Sitting cross legged, he pulled out his phone and tried to distract himself with a game of Scrabble. The night before had been the worst night in recent memory for the teen, ending with Satan threatening to request his assistance in the ruling of the underworld sooner rather than later. All Damien wanted was to be a normal kid, or, as normal as he could be: he didn’t understand why Satan wouldn’t let him have that, at least until graduation.

9. Chose 4 electives from this list if your muse is in high school, your muse will get 2 of them as it is randomized on what they will get:

Art/Painting, Theatre, Culinary Arts, Broadcasting.

10. Any additional information you would like to add:

#damien thorne #accepted #submission

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underworld-park-offical · 6 months

Text

TWEEK: Okay

TWEEK: You

TWEEK: Mister

TWEEK: Tinfoil

TWEEK: Hat

TWEEK: Guy

KENNY: Stan

TWEEK: What

KENNY: His names Stan

TWEEK: Okay

TWEEK: Cool

TWEEK: I'm not gonna remember that

TWEEK: You said you had

TWEEK: Like

TWEEK: A bunker

TWEEK: Right?

STAN: Yeah

CRAIG: Dog shit covered ahhh barn 💀

TWEEK: Why is he saying Skull emoji out loud

TOLKIEN: Not even WE know at this point

KYLE: We gotta get him to stop that

KYLE: It's more annoying than KYLE: ….Whatever….. Stan's got going on

CRAIG: Omg not you slandering me 💀

CRAIG: Don't even rn you look like the Goodwill shat you out

KYLE: Fuck you

KYLE: You know that Supreme hoodie isn't even real Supreme, right?

CRAIG: Lmao what

CRAIG: Me when I lie

KYLE: Nonononono

KYLE: Look look look

KYLE: It says “Souprem”

KYLE: It's fake merch dude

KYLE: Its as fake as those fucking yeezys

CRAIG: ….

KYLE: …Dude?

CRAIG: No that's my other hoodie

KYLE: Are you fucking serious

KYLE: You aren't even rich stop acting like you are

CRAIG: Nuh uh

KYLE: FUCK YOU MEAN NUH UH????

TOLKIEN: Kyle, just give it up

TOLKIEN: Trying to convince Craig he isn't rich is like trying to convince a toddler to wipe their own ass

TOLKIEN: It's not worth it

CLYDE: …. CLYDE: Why do I feel like that was directed towards me?

TOLKIEN: Because It was, Clyde

CLYDE: OH COME ON I WASH MY OWN ASS

TOLKIEN: NO THE FUCK YOU DO NOT YOU SMELL LIKE A TACO BELL CLYDE: FUCK YOU CLYDE: AT LEAST TWEEK LIKES ME TOLKIEN: OH SURE SURE SURE TOLKIEN: TWEEK DOESN'T ACTUALLY LIKE YOU TOLKIEN: THERE'S NO WAY SOMEONE LIKE TWEEK WOULD BE STUPID ENOUGH TO GO AFTER YOU, YOU FUCKING TESTOSTERONE FUELED SHITSTAN

CLYDE: THANK YOU FOR ACKNOWLEDGING I'M TRANS BUT FUCK YOU FOR INSULTING ME

TOLKIEN: YOU’RE VERY WELCOME, FUCK YOU TOO

CLYDE: YOU KNOW WHAT?? I BET YOU 30 BUCKS I CAN PULL IN TWEEK WITH MY MANLY AWESOMENESS

TOLKIEN: I BET YOU A MILLION DOLLARS YOU CAN'T

CLYDE: FINE

TOLKIEN: FINE

CLYDE: LETS FUCKING GO

CLYDE: I'LL ASK OUT TWEEK AND IT'LL BE THE MOST ROMANTIC THING EVER

STAN: Hmmm

STAN: At my barn we could like

STAN: Use my dad and my sister

STAN: As like

STAN: Food

KYLE: Dude no

KYLE: I am not resorting to cannibalism

CARTMAN: Kahl, you’ve eaten animals, that's basically like eating people

KYLE: Okay mr “forty big macs in one day”

CARTMAN: Uhm, actually they're vegan chicken patties KYLE

CARTMAN: ALSO did you just ASSUME my GENDER????

CARTMAN: YOU ARE GETTING C A N C E L L E D

CARTMAN: I WANT A TEAR RIDDEN UKELELE FILLED APOLOGY RIGHT NOW

KYLE: Oh my GODDDDD

KENNY: Actually studies show that most human meat is similar taste wise to chicken

CRAIG: I thought it was pork

CRAIG: Like

CRAIG: Deadass

CRAIG: Like pigs

CRAIG: Like deadass pigs

KENNY: We know what pork is CRAIG

STAN: Yeah

STAN: So we’re fucking set

CARTMAN: Uhhh no thanks, i’d rather be one with the animals and eat dirt and hay

STAN: We don't even have animals

CARTMAN: I’ll just eat the weed then

STAN: What

KENNY: What

KYLE: What

CRAIG: LMAOOOOOOO IM DEADDDDDDD 💀 💀 💀

CARTMAN: What???

CARTMAN: It's like eating catnip

CARTMAN: Besides its environmentally friendly

STAN: What's your source

CARTMAN: Wikipedia

STAN: Ooooof course it is

STAN: The internets lying to you, you know

CARTMAN: Fuck off, Stan, Queermo

STAN: IM TELLING THE TRUTH HERE

TWEEK: HhhhuGiyhvfdeiohjd

TWEEK: OKay

TWEEK: Cool

TWEEK: We’re set on a TOTALLY ANONYMOUS LOCATION

TWEEK: Awesome

TWEEK: Great

TWEEK: Dandy even!

TWEEK: Everyone

TWEEK: Lets hold hands

CRAIG: I am not touching Clydes fucking shitstained hands

TWEEK: Fine

TWEEK: I’ll hold Clyde's hand

TOLKIEN: Why do you wanna touch Clydes hands thats fucking nasty

CRAIG: For real

CRAIG: Preach 🙏🙏🙏

TWEEK: I don't care

TWEEK: It's just for a bit TWEEK: I can wash my own hands afterwards

CRAIG: EWWWW FAGS

CLYDE: Aww… really?? :D

TWEEK: Fine

TWEEK: Sure

TWEEK: Whatever

CLYDE: Nobody other than Tolkien has wanted to hold my hand before! :DD

TOLKIEN: Was that before or after I figured out you don't wash your hands

TWEEK: Who else is fine with

TWEEK: Touching Clyde

CRAIG: Stop making me have gay thoughts, Playboi Carti

TWEEK: What

TWEEK: I don't

TWEEK: I'm not

TWEEK: Just

TWEEK: Hold hands

TWEEK: You all have socks on

TWEEK: I think

TWEEK: So it's not gay

CARTMAN: Uhm erm erm erm

CARTMAN: Actually

CARTMAN: That's a homophobic statement

TWEEK: CRAIG SAID A FUCKING SLUR?????????

TWEEK: WHAT???????

TWEEK: IM TWEEK: HUH TWEEK: WHAT TWEEK: OKAY

TWEEK: JUST TWEEK: JUST HOLD HANDS TWEEK: STOP MAKING THIS HARDER FOR ME

CLYDE: Wow

CLYDE: I forgot CLYDE: What holding hands felt like

KYLE: Woah

KYLE: This reminds me of the first episode of My Little Pony

KYLE: Where

KYLE: Twilight and her friends

KYLE: Find the friendship trinkets or whatever

KYLE: And they reverse the curse on them that turns them into stone

KYLE: And they used them to like

KYLE: Defeat Nightmare Moon

KYLE: Turning her back into Princess Luna

KENNY: That was so fucking gay

KENNY: I feel like I'm gonna vomit rainbows because of you

CARTMAN: Kenny stop being homophobic

CARTMAN: I will cancel you again

KENNY: Fuck off I know that blue hair you wear online is a wig

CARTMAN: BITCH-

TWEEK: SHUT UP

TWEEK: ALL OF YOU TWEEK: MY SATAN

TWEEK: CAN YOU ALL GO LIKE TWEEK: TWO MINUTES WITHOUT FIGHTING AND OR DEGRADING EACH OTHER

KENNY: ….

CARTMAN: …. KYLE: …..

LITERALLY EVERYONE: …..

CRAIG: Slllaaa-

TOLKIEN: Dont

TOLKIEN: Just

TOLKIEN: Do not

TOLKIEN: Actually, you’ve lost speaking privileges

CRAIG: 😡

TWEEK: Alright

TWEEK: Is

TWEEK: Is everyone holding hands

CRAIG: yeah its like Kumbaya frfr

TOLKIEN: Stop talking

TWEEK: Okay

TWEEK: Alakazam

TWEEK: Alakazane

TWEEK: Im sending you off this mortal plane

KYLE: Wait wha-

CRAIG: Like And Subscribe! Like And Subscribe! Like And Subscribe! Like And Subscribe! Like And Subscribe!

KENNY: Yoooo

CRAIG: Like and Share! Like and Share! Like and Share!

TOLKIEN: Haaaaa

TOLKIEN: What

TOLKIEN: Was that

TWEEK: Magic Trick

TOLKIEN: What

TWEEK: Hey you have a lot of free time when you live in a dumpster

CRAIG: Copy link! Copy link! Copy link! Copy link! Copy link! Copy link!

TOLKIEN: Whatever, please for the sake of our brain cells, never do that again

KENNY: I dunno

KENNY: I thought that was pretty cool

CRAIG: Kombucha? I LLLOOOVVVEEE KOMBUCHA! Kombucha? I LOVE KOMBUCHA Kombucha? I LOVE KOMBUCHA Kombucha? I LOVE KOMBUCHA

TWEEK: Alright

TWEEK: Humans

TWEEK: Freaks

TWEEK: Whatever your names are

TWEEK: Get in the fucking barn

TWEEK: Now, quoting the safety psas from Estella,

TWEEK: Don't open the door for strangers, Don’t investigate any random noises, don't take any offers from strange men in white vans, don't help anyone, if anyone says they're friends of your parents do not trust them

TWEEK: And for goodness sake,

TWEEK: USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM

CRAIG: I'm addicted to Takis! I'm addicted to Takis! I'm addicted to Takis! I'm addicted to Takis!

STAN: One, what are we, five?

STAN: Second

STAN: It's a backup bunker, not a barn

TWEEK: WHATEVER! JUST- GET IN

TWEEK: DO YOU WANNA LIVE OR NOT????

STAN: No

TWEEK: …

STAN: …

TWEEK: ….

STAN: ….

TWEEK: ….

TWEEK: O….

TWEEK: Kay…..

TWEEK: Just…..

TWEEK: Get in the barn

STAN: Fineeeee

STAN: Whatever

STAN: Fuck you

CRAIG: [ Gotta sleep in fucking pig shit this sucks fuck this ]

CLYDE: Hey

CLYDE: Hey CLYDE: Hey Tweek

TWEEK: Arrrghhh…What….

CLYDE: Do

CLYDE: Do you

CLYDE: Do you think

CLYDE: Do you think we CLYDE: Do you

CLYDE: Do you think we could

CLYDE: Maybe

CLYDE: Like

CLYDE: Go to like

CLYDE: Dennys

CLYDE: After this???

TWEEK: Whats

TWEEK: What's Dennys?

CLYDE: Oh

CLYDE: Uh

CLYDE: Maybe we could like

CLYDE: Go to Olive Garden then?

TWEEK: What

TWEEK: What's an olive?

TWEEK: And

TWEEK: And what's a Garden?

CLYDE: …

CLYDE: Oh you poor

CLYDE: Sweet

CLYDE: Summer child

CLYDE: You know what

CLYDE: I'm gonna take you to the Olive Garden

CLYDE: And you're gonna have the time of your fucking life

TWEEK: Uh

TWEEK: O

TWEEK: OKAY?????

CLYDE: Alright

CLYDE: I’ll see you there babe

TWEEK: Uh

TWEEK: UHHH

TWEEK: WHAT

TWEEK: DID YOU JUST CALL ME BABE TWEEK: WHAT???

TOLKIEN: Don’t fall for that shit

TOLKIEN: He doesn't wash his hands

TOLKIEN: Or his ass

TWEEK: Why's that relevant?

TOLKIEN: IT'S FUCKING DISGUSTING?????

TWEEK: CHILL OUT IT'S NOT THAT BAD

TOLKIEN: YES IT IS??????

TWEEK: …Whatevs

TOLKIEN: ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS????

(edits made by @pissblanket)

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underworld-park-offical · 3 months

Text

GREGORY: Ugh

GREGORY: That one girls hair looked so ugly

GREGORY: It didn't match her clothes at all

GREGORY: I can just tell she’s related to Craig_The_Real_Tucker

ESTELLA: Gregory!! Do NOT be rude!

GREGORY: What!?! I’m just saying!

ESTELLA: They are just children!

GREGORY: So? Children can be ugly as fuck, too!

ESTELLA: Gregory. Don’t make me do the count

GREGORY: Yes, ma'am...

ESTELLA: Well, we cannot discuss anything until Phillip, Tweek and Thomas are back

GREGORY: Ugh, seriously?

ESTELLA: You know our "nobody left behind policy", Gregory!

GREGORY: So what are we supposed to do?

ESTELLA: I suppose we shall have to wait

GREGORY: Hell no

ESTELLA: Language, Gregory!

GREGORY: I’m looking around for something to do

GREGORY: Ugh, there's a drawer full of Supreme hoodies

GREGORY: No way in the seven layers of hell will I ever put these disgraces of fashion on him

ESTELLA: Language!

GREGORY: Hell isn't a curse word, Madame Estella

ESTELLA: It very much so is

GREGORY: This is still not going on him, no matter your insistence.

ESTELLA: He needs warmth Gregory

GREGORY: There's always the option of burning these.

ESTELLA: Quit it!

GREGORY: (scoff)

GREGORY: It doesn’t even suit him well in this lighting anyway

GREGORY: The white barely complements anything

ESTELLA: Young man, i mean it

ESTELLA: Knock. It. Off.

GREGORY: Alright, I suppose no more nitpicking for me…

GREGORY: This will unfortunately have to do…

ESTELLA: While we’re here we may as well close this portal up

GREGORY: Why??

ESTELLA: So no other demons wander and get hurt, of course!

GREGORY: Oh you and your safety

ESTELLA: I don't want the parents of these implings to start worrying if their child goes missing!

ESTELLA: Would you mind giving me a hand?

ESTELLA: I can’t exactly do this type of magic by myself

GREGORY: No!

ESTELLA: Gregory, I'm not asking you, I'm telling you!

GREGORY: I’M NOT DOING JACK SHIT I JUST GOT MY NAILS DONE!!!

ESTELLA: LANGUAGE!!!!

ESTELLA: WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE GROUNDED TOO?!?! GREGORY: WE ARE THE SAME AGE YOU HAVE NO AUTHORITY OVER ME

ESTELLA: OH YES I DO!! DON’T THINK I WON'T GO THROUGH YOUR INSTAGRAM DRAFTS

GREGORY: YOU WOULDN’T ESTELLA: I VERY MUCH SO WOULD. GREGORY: UGH! FINE! I'LL HELP!!

GREGORY: BUT I AM NOT STANDING!

ESTELLA: Thank you!

GREGORY: (scoff)

GREGORY: (eyeroll)

GREGORY: …?

GREGORY: Oh ho ho! NOW we’re talking!

ESTELLA: Gregory, what are you giggling about?

GREGORY: Ohhhh nothing~

ESTELLA: If you so much as BREATHE on that lap top young man, the last thing that you will be seeing is my sandal

GREGORY: I never said I was going to touch it!

ESTELLA: Well I can tell you were! No electronics until you help me fix this!

GREGORY: Yes ma’am…

ESTELLA: Although…. I suppose you have been very good up until now…

ESTELLA: If you say that you’re sorry for the way that you acted, I allow you to go on the computer until I need you

ESTELLA: But you HAVE to mean it!

ESTELLA: No sarcasm!

GREGORY: Right, right,

GREGORY: I want to apologize to you for what I did, it was VERY wrong and I am VERY sorry

GREGORY: I just would like to move on and lead a normal life, you know?

GREGORY: Get a job, a husband, and change my ways.

GREGORY: I hope this apology impresses you, even though you made me do it and I don’t actually mean it.

ESTELLA: You mean you do mean it?

GREGORY: I mean i do mean it

ESTELLA: Hmmm…..

ESTELLA: I suppose that will do

ESTELLA: Go on, then,

ESTELLA: I'll let you know when you're needed

ESTELLA: Do not give me sass when I need you, either, or else you won't have ANY computer time!

GREGORY: Hooray! Thank you, Estella!

GREGORY: Time to scroll through Instagram reels and hate myself!

(Images edited by @pissblanket)

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underworld-park-offical · 5 months

Text

CRAIG: Hey

CRAIG: Can you like,

CRAIG: call someone?

TOLKIEN: Why?

CRAIG: So Kenny stops getting up my ass

TOLKIEN: Who would I even call in this scenario, and WHY?

CRAIG: I don’t know, our queermo lesbian friends from the hypehouse

TOLKIEN: Bebe is the straightest woman alive are you joking?

CRAIG: She hangs out with fags, so shes a fag too

TOLKIEN: Whatever

CRAIG: Thanks Tolkieeeen

TOLKIEN: Yeah yeah yeah….

TOLKIEN: I think we should call Daimen first though

CRAIG: Why? Isn't he at work? Smh my fucking head

TOLKIEN: Yeah, but he doesn’t do jack shit

TOLKIEN: And I can guarantee he’s bored to tears anyway

TOLKIEN: Could use a bit of lightheartedness in this situation

CARTMAN: If you could call OUTSIDE that’d be nice

CARTMAN: I’m trying to get my 8 hours of sleep so I don't get my brain eaten

CARTMAN: It's hard enough as it is with, and no offense to you, Clyde

CARTMAN: CLYDE'S SHITSTAINED ASS SELF SITTING AND SHITTING RIGHT BELOW ME

CLYDE: Dude I have IBS…

CLYDE: Not cool :(

CARTMAN: You can at least change your pants so we don’t have to smell you

CLYDE: I DON'T HAVE ANY

CRAIG: EWWWWW

CLYDE: WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH CRAIG: You guys love the hit game Among Us?

CLYDE: ….

CLYDE: SNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE MIMIMIMIMIMI

CLYDE: SNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE MIMIMIMIMIMIMIMI

CARTMAN: HONK SHOO HONK SHOO

CRAIG: There we go, they assess is out 💀

TOLKIEN: What, like you?

CRAIG: ….

CRAIG: Tolkien, hurry up and call him

TOLKIEN: Kinda hard to do that when I don't have any service

CRAIG: Just type a bunch of 6s into the phone

TOLKIEN: Will that even work?

CRAIG: It will, I've done it before

TOLKIEN: Of course you would

CRAIG: <3

TOLKIEN: Whatever, worth a shot

TOLKIEN: (Barbie Girl ringtone)

TOLKIEN: Hey Daimen, it's Tolkien

TOLKIEN: Uh

TOLKIEN: We’re kinda fucked right now?

TOLKIEN: I know you don’t really like us but you’re the only person in this group I can really tolerate

TOLKIEN: When you get this can you get to the Barn?

TOLKIEN: You know, the one where we smoked weed at once?

TOLKIEN: Yeah, that one

TOLKIEN: I can’t describe it just in case the other demons are listening

TOLKIEN: They have a target on each of our backs and we don't wanna give away our locations

TOLKIEN: You know?

TOLKIEN: Call me back

TOLKIEN: Fuck you

TOLKIEN: Bye

(Edits made by @pissblanket , credits for video are in video description <3)

#craigfluencer #craig tucker #hellpark #south park #south park edits #sp #southpark #underworld park #underworld park tweek #underworld park pip #underworld park clyde #underworld park tolkien #underworld park damien #underworld park cartman #underworld park gregory #underworld park kyle #underworld park stan #underworld park estella

51 notes · View notes

underworld-park-offical · 5 months

Text

What the FREAK!!!

Literally get out of there smh my head

-Craig_The_Real_Tucker

Yes of course!! You're so stunning Holly!! If you'd like to come over and paint each others nails I'd be more than happy too!! <333

Also your fashion sense is DIVINE, people could learn a thing or two from you!

-Gregory_Cutie_Pie_3rd

Finally, a bloke with fucking common sense. Truly so hard to find these days.

-Pip P.

My word! Please do not resort to such drastic measures!

I'm sorry to disappoint you but my answer still remains the same, It is a firm NO, if you cannot respect my wishes than I will no longer answer your asks.

I apologize for being so direct, but I feel as if It must be done.

With love,

Estella.

Didn't she tell you no? I'm sorry but I have to respect her wishes, I love her too much to do this to her (platonically, of course). But I mean.... I'm not opposed to getting a partner... (just... you know... throwing that out there...)

-Gregory_Cutie_Pie_3rd

WHAT TEHD FFJUXCK WHERED YOU GET THAT YORUEE A SPY YOURE ASPY LEAVE ME ALONE IM NOT PAYIENG MY TAGCES

-Stan

Oh you poor thing!

Why yes of course! I love collaborating with my fans! They've all been such lovely people, as long as you're okay with me doing your makeup/being on video in general, I'd happily collab! Just let me know where and when

-Gregory_Cutie_Pie_3rd

Literally what the FREAK!!! It's been X for like... a month??? Maybe more?? Smh my fucking head

Hey Anon,

I've got to say, your recent comment about my hair was seriously uncalled for. "Ugly"? Really?

I'm all for expressing opinions, but let's try to keep it real here – your choice of words was downright rude and offensive. It's my hair, not yours, and I don't recall asking for your unsolicited critique.

If you've got an issue or if my hair somehow offends your delicate sensibilities, how about expressing it like a decent human being instead of resorting to insults? It's infuriating to think that someone I know can be so insensitive.

Next time you feel the urge to be brutally honest, maybe take a moment to consider how it might feel on the receiving end. Constructive criticism is one thing, but your comment was just plain mean.

Not impressed,

Blue_Haired_Cartman

That's okay, everyone's entitled to their own opinion,

but it doesn't mean that opinion is correct :)

30 notes · View notes

underworld-park-offical · 5 months

Text

CRAIG: He didn’t pick up?

TOLKIEN: Clearly not

CRAIG: Damn L

CRAIG: Big L

TOLKIEN: Who else can we call?

CRAIG: My friends from the hypehouse im in?

TOLKIEN: The what?

CRAIG: A hype house

CRAIG: Yknow like

CRAIG: You get a bunch of cool and famous people in a house together

CRAIG: And then you like

CRAIG: Film them doing shit and you get like

CRAIG: MEGA rich.

TOLKIEN: That's queer

CRAIG: You’re queer

TOLKIEN: So are you

CRAIG: AURRR NAUURRR, CLEAURRRR!!!

TOLKIEN: I mean

TOLKIEN: It’s not a bad idea…

TOLKIEN: But I think i’d be wiser to call Nichole

TOLKIEN: She at least has common sense

CRAIG: Who?

TOLKIEN: My ex from before I knew I was gay

CRAIG: Oh

CRAIG: You’re still friends with her but not Clyde?

TOLKIEN: I’m still mad at Clyde

TOLKIEN: At least Nichole washed her hands

CRAIG: Lmao

CRAIG: Based

TOLKIEN: Shut up

TOLKIEN: I'm calling them right now

NICHOLE: Wow, that movie was really good!

NICHOLE: Though, to be honest

NICHOLE: I think we should’ve saw Oppenheimer

WENDY: Hoe, do you even KNOW what Oppenheimer was about?

NICHOLE: Yeah, I saw like two trailers

WENDY: What's it about then?

NICHOLE: Well-

(Shape of you ringtone)

NICHOLE: Oop! That's mine!

WENDY: Oh my fucking god, it’s like, 1 am

WENDY: Who's calling you right now??

NICHOLE: Oh it's–!

NICHOLE: Tolkien?

BEBE: YOUR EX???????

NICHOLE: Yeah

BEBE: BIIIIITCH, is he single?

NICHOLE: No, last I heard he was dating Clyde

BEBE: I can fix him

NICHOLE: He’s gay, Bebe, not a robot

BEBE: I can fix him

NICHOLE: Whatever

RED: Wassup, Wassup, Wassup, it's Prince Charming

RED: Hey Tolkien

NICHOLE: I didn't even pick up the phone

RED: ….

RED: Oh

NICHOLE: "Hello, hello? Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first night. Um, I actually worked in that office before you. I'm finishing up my last week now, as a matter of fact. So, I know it can be a bit overwhelming, but I'm here to tell you there's nothing to worry about. Uh, you'll do fine. So, let's just focus on getting you through your first week. Okay?

Uh, let's see, first there's an introductory greeting from the company that I'm supposed to read. Uh, it's kind of a legal thing, you know. Um, "Welcome to Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. A magical place for kids and grown-ups alike, where fantasy and fun come to life. Fazbear Entertainment is not responsible for damage to property or person.

Upon discovering that damage or death has occurred, a missing person report will be filed within 90 days, or as soon as property and premises have been thoroughly cleaned and bleached, and the carpets have been replaced." Blah, blah, blah. Now that might sound bad, I know, but there's really nothing to worry about. Uh, the animatronic characters here do get a bit quirky at night, but do I blame them? No.

If I were forced to sing those same stupid songs for twenty years and I never got a bath? I'd probably be a bit irritable at night too. So, remember, these characters hold a special place in the hearts of children and we need to show them a little respect, right? Okay. So, just be aware, the characters do tend to wander a bit. Uh, they're left in some kind of free roaming mode at night. Uh... Something about their servos locking up if they get turned off for too long.

Uh, they used to be allowed to walk around during the day too. But then there was The Bite of '87. Yeah. I-It's amazing that the human body can live without the frontal lobe, you know? Uh, now concerning your safety, the only real risk to you as a night watchman here, if any, is the fact that these characters, uh, if they happen to see you after hours probably won't recognize you as a person. They'll pr- they'll most likely see you as a metal endoskeleton

without its costume on. Now since that's against the rules here at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, they'll probably try to...forcefully stuff you inside a Freddy Fazbear suit."

TOLKIEN: Uhm TOLKIEN: Hello? TOLKIEN: Nichole?

BEBE: Hiiiiiiii Babyyyyy~

TOLKIEN: Oh TOLKIEN: Hey… TOLKIEN: Uh… TOLKIEN: Ba…. bee?

BEBE: Bebe, baby,

BEBE: It's kinda like baby, but it's not! BEBE: Its B-E-B-E

BEBE: And that's how you spell my name, baby!

BEBE: Sweetie!

BEBE: Honey bunches of oats!

TOLKIEN: Don’t call me those things, we aren't dating TOLKIEN: I'm gay, anyways

BEBE: I won't tell Clyde

TOLKIEN: I’m not even dating Clyde anymore

NICHOLE: Oh my god why? What happened?

TOLKIEN: I found out he doesn't actually wash his hands TOLKIEN: Like… ever

WENDY: EWWWW

RED: Bruh ☠️

RED: BRUHHHHHH 💀 💀 💀

WENDY: Other than that….

WENDY: Disgusting ass mess

WENDY: What's up?

TOLKIEN: Oh nothing much TOLKIEN: Just getting haunted by demons TOLKIEN: You know how it is

RED: Oh cool

RED: …. RED: Wait what

NICHOLE: Yeah wait what?

BEBE: WHAT???? BEBE: OH MY GODDDDDD BEBE: ARE YOU DEAD??????

TOLKIEN: Yes TOLKIEN: I am dead TOLKIEN: I'm talking to you on my ghost phone in the afterlife

BEBE: WHAT!?!?!??!?!??!?!?!?!??

TOLKIEN: Yes, I'm alive you dumb bitch

BEBE: Oh thanK GAWDDDDD

TOLKIEN: Anyways TOLKIEN: Craig wanted me to call you

WENDY: Why?

TOLKIEN: I don't know TOLKIEN: He’s Craig

RED: Yall fucked around with an Oujia Board and found out?

TOLKIEN: Craig decided to be an idiot and use it while we were gone TOLKIEN: He was gonna slander the dead person for their subscriber count

WENDY: Of course he would

BEBE: I mean like

BEBE: Why wouldn't he?

BEBE: I’ve collabed with him enough times

BEBE: Image counts

BEBE: Especially on our duo account Xx_The_Real_Ones_xX

BEBE: Like

BEBE: I don't want some ass hat with less than 500 followers following my ass

BEBE: Smh my head

TOLKIEN: God I forgot how insufferable you and Red are TOLKIEN: It's just Craig all over again

BEBE: What?

TOLKIEN: What? TOLKIEN: Oh yeah, by the way, Jimmys fucking dead

RED: WHAT?!?!

RED: Noooo Jimmy was literally so cool

WENDY: Okay yeah this sounds like

WENDY: Awful

WENDY: Do you want us to come over?

TOLKIEN: What TOLKIEN: No TOLKIEN: That’ll put you in danger

RED: I’ve seen every horror movie ever

RED: You’ve involved us with this phone call

RED: We’re pretty much already fucked

RED: Who's got the car keys?

BEBE: Meeee!!

BEBE: Memememmemmeme!!

RED: Okay bitch lets go

BEBE: YASSSS QUEEN

BEBE: YAYYYYYY

BEBE: RESCUE MISSIONNNN!!!!

NICHOLE: We’re coming, Tolkien, where are you guys?

TOLKIEN: Stan's Bunker

WENDY: His room?

TOLKIEN: No TOLKIEN: The other one

WENDY: The barn?

TOLKIEN: Yeah

WENDY: Okay, we’re coming, see you soon

RED: Lets go yall

RED: We got some people to find

BEBE: YEAHHHHHH!!!

NICHOLE: Stay safe until then guys, okay?

TOLKIEN: We’ll try TOLKIEN: Man, Tweek is going to kill me

BEBE: Who's Tweek?

BEBE: (GASP) BEBE: DON'T TELL ME BEBE: HE'S YOUR BOYFRIEND?!?!?!?!??!?

BEBE: WAHHHHHH

TOLKIEN: No, he's not my boyfriend

TOLKIEN: He's Clyde's

BEBE: WAHHHHHH…. waaaait

BEBE: Clyde got a new boyfriend ALREADY???

TOLKIEN: Yeah TOLKIEN: You all missed a lot

RED: I mean

RED: To be fair

RED: Until now, we didn't have plot relevancy

TOLKIEN: What?

BEBE: What?

WENDY: What?

NICHOLE: What?

RED: What?

TOLKIEN: Whatever, just TOLKIEN: Just get here soon guys TOLKIEN: Try not to die on your way here, either

RED: Well RED: We can't make any promises now, can we?

BEBE: Oh don't be so NEGATIVE, Red

BEBE: We’ll live

RED: …

RED: Okay well now we're definitely gonna die

WENDY: Red, Stop that!

RED: I'M JUST BEING LOGICAL

WENDY: HORROR MOVIES AREN'T ACTUAL LOGIC YOU IDIOT!

NICHOLE: We’ll be there as soon as we can

NICHOLE: It’ll be a miracle if we can even get out to Bebe's Porsche

TOLKIEN: Alright TOLKIEN: Bye Nichole

NICHOLE: See ya (Poopyface)

(Edits made by @cattpup5 BE NICE TO THEM THEY WORKED VERY HARD >:((( )

37 notes · View notes