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bclthczcros · 5 years

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task : the interrogation

mentioned: @ofhvney, @the-great-and-wonderful-oz, @ofzola, @thcyer, @divineangcl, @holdenwoodz

zar was shaking as soon as he got the message, and he hadn’t really stopped shaking since. he’d lied to the authorities plenty of times, why are you in this building? did you start this fight? where did you get that bruise? but it had been a while since he’d been sixteen. hopefully, he thought as he kissed honey goodbye and walked into the ashmont pd, it was like riding a bicycle.

if possible, he was hoping even harder now, trying his best to seem... at least semi-casual sitting in front of officer grant and officer forrester. his usual go-to mode when speaking to authority figures was defiant, so he tried to seem a little more innocent, a little more wide-eyed. he didn’t know if he was successfully fooling anybody.

Do you have any criminal history? Anything big or small that you want to make us aware of?

zar bit the inside of his lip, shifting a little bit in his chair and trying to maintain eye contact. his past was shameful, he could admit it, so it would make sense if he was a little embarrassed, right? “yeah, actually, um, from when i was a minor. assault, vandalism, illegal consumption of marijuana, underage drinking, trespassing, and breaking and entering.”

he considered, for a split second, mentioning the fighting ring, but he very quickly decided that was the worst idea he’d ever had; he didn’t need anyone snooping in on that. even though, given the city-wide curfew and the increased police presence, the ring was kind of dying out on its own. instead, he presented his upturned hands, and said, “but that was all back in high school; i’ve been living pretty clean since i came to ashmont. oh, uh,” he bit his lip. “except for the puppy mill incident, but i wasn’t charged.” officer grant raised her eyebrows, and zar pretended like he hadn’t been planning out how to make the great puppy heist work since then. step one: don’t be drunk while doing it. he glanced down at his hands, somewhat embarrassed. “it should be in your records somewhere.”

How have you spent the few weeks back at college? What have they been like?

he tried not to give too heavy of a sigh, but he still exhaled through his nose. “studying, working, volunteering. the usual, y’know? they’ve been... hectic. kinda hellish. i mean, a girl is dead. it’s pretty difficult to get through that.” and, of course, there was their little exposing murderer, but zar didn’t dare mention her to the cops. he really didn’t need them finding that blog. “and with the... the mural at the art exhibit... i don’t know, everyone’s been super paranoid.” he indicated himself. “i’ve been paranoid.”

How did you know Miss. Rutherford? What was the nature of your relationship?

“i’m her family’s dog walker,” zar started, tip-toeing around this topic. “or, i was. the rutherfords have been letting a lot of staff go in the wake of their daughter’s death, which is understandable. they don’t want many people around their place right now.” he bit his lip; he supposed it would be best to be candid about this. “i... for a while, i was under the impression that her dogs were being abused.” he was still under that impression, but it would probably be better to pretend that was all in the past. “i volunteer at the humane society, y’know? so i thought i knew” i actually know “what abused dogs look and act like. i thought they were shelter dogs at first because of how jumpy they were, but they were quick to tell me they’ve had them since they were puppies, so.”

he sighed, shook his head, and couldn’t help it; he crossed his arms. “i told daisey that- basically i threatened to contact the humane society, and i told other people i might take them there myself, which-.” he shrugged, sighing. “which was a dumb thing to say, and i would never do that but i was just- i was angry. i’m extremely passionate about animal rights- i’m hoping to become a vet with an animal welfare specialization.” with that, he shrugged, “so, no, daisey and i didn’t have a good relationship, but it was simply a misunderstanding. if i could say one last thing to her,” oh, god, could he manage this? he tried to unlock his jaw, look officer grant in the eye. “i would apologize for accusing her of such a heinous act, and of telling so many people about it.” she seemed to buy it; then again, she was probably just pretending. great.

Do you remember where you were the night Daisey went missing? If so, where were you? What were you doing? Who were you with?

oh, you mean the night i realized i was in love with my now-boyfriend and also almost ruined the couch of one of the richest families in town? “i was at the homecoming party,” zar said, rubbing his hands together. “at the lamar family home. which,” he indicated with one hand, expression earnest, “i presume you know about.” y’know, since it was the last place daisey was seen alive and all. he pursed his lips together, “um, i spent a bit of the night with honey kennedy? or, ulysses,” it always felt weird to call him that, “but he goes by honey. i was hooking up with him in the bathroom at about... eleven-ish? um, i hung out with zola carter for a little bit, when i got there at about ten, and then later on at around midnight.”

“i smoked outside with sam...” he put a hand to his forehead; fuck, what was his last name again? zar snapped his fingers when he remembered. “samuel thayer. that was just after i-.” he clenched his jaw. “after i got into a little fight with oscar lamar. nothing too major, obviously, or anything physical,” except for those spring rolls, “just... we don’t get along, y’know? zola’s his cousin, and he thinks i’m a bad influence on her.” he sighed to himself, “i went back inside, danced with some people whose... names i can’t remember, and then i went home at about two thirty in the morning after saying good-bye to zola.” yeah, that was about how he’d spent the night, give or take a few details.

Did you notice anything strange about Daisey’s behavior the night she went missing? Did you notice anything suspicious about anyone else you ran into that night?

he looked up for a moment, trying to remember. “not really... like i said, daisey and i didn’t exactly get along, so we tend to avoid each other. oh,” he sat up, almost surprised he forgot. “there was one thing, though.” oh fuck, was he really about to throw someone under the bus. well, he’d started this sentence, so he had to end it. “i saw her friend angel, angelica flores, and her arguing from across the room? i couldn’t hear what they were arguing about, but angel kept...” fuck, he really hoped he was right. “it looked like she was trying to get daisey to drink something, but daisey didn’t want to drink it.” he shook his head, glancing back up at them. “again, that’s just what i saw, but it seemed fishy.”

Where were you the night Daisey’s body was recovered?

zar shrugged. “i was at home. watching old battlestar galactica episodes in my room.” and icing his injuries from his fight; the night before had been the night of the voicemail. it was a shit alibi, but it was his alibi.

How familiar are you with the Ashmont woods? Have you been there often? Have you recently ventured out here? If so, why?

zar frowned for a moment; that wasn’t where daisey was found. was... was that where she was killed? “i went for an ecology class once in, like, sophomore year,” he admitted, “but i’m... i’m not at all familiar with those woods. i’m from out of town, so i don’t exactly know ashmont all that well, especially outside of campus.”

Do you have feelings towards the investigation? Any comments?

he shook his head. “not really? like... why would i have feelings towards it?” it was a genuine question, and read as such. “i mean, a girl is dead, and you’re questioning everyone who was involved, so you seem to be doing pretty thorough.” zar shrugged for what felt like the tenth time this interview.

Do you have any people you feel the police should look into? Please, let us know who and why.

there were plenty of people that zar thought could be guilty. any number of daisey’s exes. her fiance who was, apparently, not super into her. a part of him wanted to throw holden under the bus, but even zar knew it wasn’t deserved. “just angel, honestly. though i don’t...” zar shook his head, remembering her breakdown. “i don’t think she would have killed her, honestly. but i just have a bad feeling about her making daisey drink something, y’know?”

What do you remember of the gallery opening? What did you do? Who were you with?

zar tried not to look too nervous at the question. “yeah, i do. i, uh, took in the art. drank a bit of champagne. i was mostly checking out my friends’ pieces. uh, i went with honey. kennedy. ulysses? my boyfriend.” he swallowed, going over the lie he’d prepared in his head. “all things considered, i didn’t stay for very long. i got a message from our neighbor about my cat, bath bomb? she’d caught herself in the fire escape and i needed to take care of her. so i had to run home. take her to the vet.”

What do you know about the vandalism that transpired that night?

he shrugged. “i... honestly, i didn’t know about it until the next day. my boyfriend and i left through the back. just ‘cause it was closer to our place. i didn’t even see it in real life. but, i...” zar sighed, raising his eyebrows. “i heard it was blood, and i heard it was fuc- messed up.”

Did you see anything questionable that night?

“no,” zar insisted, shaking his head. “not at all.”

as officer grant and officer forrester dismissed him, he hoped that would be the last he’d see of the ashmont pd, but somehow knew that wouldn’t be the case.

#veritasinterrogation #tasks; zar #the more i wrote the more i was like zar bby u diggin urself a hole

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ghoulstars · 6 years

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im only posting this bc i desperately need to exorcise this thought somewhere bc it wont fucking leave me alone

those of you who know me personally or follow my instagram know about this but for those of you who dont: in a horrible turn of events, our plan to put down our geriatric yellow labrador retriever dixie was unfortunately and unexpectedly doubled today to having to put down our 3 year old engam bulldog, bean, as well

when we got him in mid december, 2015 he was barely out of puppyhood, we found him wandering around near the highway at our local gas station with a collar and no tag, trying to jump into two out-of-towner girls’ car. my stepdad intervened bc they couldnt take bean with them obviously, and brought him home instead.

we put up lost dog flyers everywhere all over our very small city, in an attempt to maybe see if someone would indeed come forward for their dog. we knew he wasnt just a stray because of his collar.

almost right off the bat, we were told by a woman who worked at the gas station that there was a man who lived in the trailer park just across the road, located behind the pancake diner. you can see it from the gas station parking lot. she told us that he had a lot of dogs that he typically kept chained up outside in poor conditions, and beat them regularly. to us? it seemed totally reasonable that that must’ve been where bean came from, given the fact he was a dog and we found him literally less than 50 feet away from where this fucking man lived.

no one came forward to claim bean. we kept those flyers up for months, we only put them up to begin with knowing he may have been thrown out by (or escaped from) this disgusting man just because there was the possibility that it wasn’t his dog, but someone else’s. as well as the potential for legal intervention if this fabled abuser found out we had technically stolen his dog (and full disclosure, fuck him for what he does, i hope all his dogs get stolen like they need to be, i myself was not fond of the idea of just giving the dog back to this creep if he was indeed the owner but i was only 16 at the time so there wasnt much i could do)

with no one claiming bean, after those months passed, we decided that he was ours now. flyers were taken down, we gave him his collar and nametag, to be real he’d already been named by us in the first few days we had him. he was going to be ours no matter what; my mother always told me its a rule that if you name a stray, and do it quick before anyone can object to keeping it, it’s yours now. that’s your pet, with it’s new name.

so we carried on with our lives, now having not just one dog, but two. it was a bit iffy with my stepfather keeping bean since we didnt technically need to manage two dogs at the time, but we still did it anyways because we loved him, the little bean man.

but here’s where my problem lies and this is why im writing this now: as time went on and we continued to have bean as our pet, some stuff about the original suggestion that he belonged to an abusive older man who lived in close proximity to where we found bean wasnt adding up

due to dixie’s failing body, she would sometimes lose control of her bowels inside the house, which was becoming unacceptable when she stayed in overnight. so, she stayed outside. she and bean bonded, so they stayed outside together too. (and for clarity here, i know what some of you might want to say, but we knew very early on that bulldogs do not do well with heat or isolation. we also know that dixie probably shouldve been put down years ago, but here’s the trouble: my stepfather would not let us euthanize her. she is his dog technically, and the thought hurt him so much that he would not agree to it for YEARS. dixie and bean were too attached to separate them for long periods of time like they would be if we kept bean inside mostly and her outside mostly; that would’ve been cruel in its own special way. we put pools out for bean and visited with both dogs for as much as we could outside, bathed them, put fans out for them in the summer. our only option to give bean the main love and care he needed was, and of course we had other reasons to do this, to put dixie down, which was where we thought we were finally going to be by tomorrow, but thats not what happened, as you can tell)

as to be expected, bean sometimes found his way inside, mostly by applying his american bulldog traits to memorizing when unfamiliar guests would come over and bolt in the house. he did this enough times and very recently we were letting him stay inside instead of taking him back out, and all of these experiences combined, we noticed something: bean was housebroken. he was out of practice with it, and did not know very well how to communicate that he needed to go outside to use the bathroom, but he did know what to do. he would run to the door if he had to go, not always making it, but still, he was housebroken. he only marked furniture once while inside, in his entire lifespan thus far. that was a red flag to us, but especially my mother, who realized this skill of beans directly contradicted the statement that he was probably kept outside, chained up, starved, and beaten by the trailer park guy. not to mention, bean came to us in nearly perfect condition to begin with, just skinny. no patches of fur gone, he was the opposite of skittish and aggressive, no bruises, nothing. just a loving, bouncy, stupid bulldog mix

this, im not sure if im correct about this, but it stands out enough to me that i feel its worth mentioning: bean is not a mutt of any kind, and his breed contradicts those types of breeds most people who abuse animals come to own; usually large breeds, breeds inaccurately known for aggression, and breeds used by abusers to make aggressive bc they know the fighting power of these dogs (pitbulls, american bulldogs, etc). bean is an engam bulldog (english/american mix), which is a very obscure mixed breed dog to begin with and especially obscure where i live, and as we all know english bulldogs are short, stout, fat little things that can basically do no harm whatsoever. they also have a history of inbreeding to look how they do. i know this man may have just seen ‘bulldog’ and snagged him thinking he’d be aggressive, but that does not sit right with me for two other reasons: bean’s conformation (body structure) and coloration. there is nothing about bean that suggests he was bred to be used for fighting, or that he’s a true mutt, or anything of the sort. his body type literally resembles that of show dogs, and his fur coloration is highly unusual because he’s blue. obviously not literally blue but the type of blue-grey you can find in animals, typically seen in cats. bean’s coloration is almost NEVER found in ANY breed of bulldog, it is INCREDIBLY rare that he looks like this. his condition in which we found him, his housebrokenness, his color and his body formation lead, in me and my family’s opinion, to an alternative opinion: he belonged to someone that got him because they wanted a dog as a pet, not to beat, and they either bred him themselves or bought him (probably from a pet store or breeder) for his color and conformation.

but why would they dump a dog this valuable? my mom said this to me earlier, sobbing after she returned from the vet today, and this is my whole reason for writing this insane fucking novel of a post: whoever dumped bean threw out a sick puppy, and on purpose.

bean hasnt been injured or contracted an unvaccinated illness or anything like that. he had been experiencing extreme stomach distension for the past month, whereas he was losing weight everywhere else on his body. he had also been vomiting. but he wasnt depressed, or lethargic. maybe his personality was a little off but not so much it was horribly noticeable, and at that, he was still eating regularly everyday. we came to the conclusion he had parasites, though ive always been terrified something more serious was going on (i dont get listened to though).

as it turns out, i was right. mom took him in today, the day before dixie was set to be put down, for his deworming pills. what she got instead was a diagnosis of possible lung cancer. his blood work was normal, which is unusual in animals with cancer, but he still had nodules on his lungs that highly resembled cancer. his heart was also severely enlarged due to heartworms, and his stomach was so distended because it was full of fluid and blood. they did send his blood off for labs, but even if his lungs were fine, he was going to die anyway (they got a second opinion from another practice and they also agree it was probably cancerous). he has a 15% survival rate for only the very first heartworm treatment, which will cost $500. nothing lives very long with an enlarged heart to begin with. we don’t have that money, and for a treatment that will definitely kill him? i dont even know why he has so much blood and fluid in his digestive tract. bean, a dog who is only 3 or 4 years old, has an enlarged heart, lung tumors and fluid/blood all in his abdomen. the vet was apparently stunned that a dog this young could have this many potentially (and one definitely) fatal health problem(s).

i now fully believe that whoever owned him before knew he had all these issues, or that he was going to develop them. i think it makes sense. i also think they’re cheap, cruel fucks who didnt want to shell out that much money to take care of him, or pay to take him to a shelter/sanctuary, and so what did they do? they did what many people these days very regularly do when their new pet has become undesirable: they fucking dumped him on the side of the road and booked it. took his nametag off and everything, to make him look like a stray. they left him for some well meaning, animal loving family like mine to find him, not know anything about these preexisting health issues, and assume he’s healthy enough; maybe just needs a few more vaccinations and a worm and flea treatment. he showed no signs of lung cancer or heart problems in all his life up until this past month, and he’s still so young. i will even go as far as to say that he himself may be severely inbred, which could be the cause of these health issues. given his specific posture and color, and that he’s a bulldog, it’d make sense. it seems like he came from some kind of breeder to begin with anyway.

so now that ive said that and got it all out of the way, i want to leave an open letter to the hypothetical cunt that did this to us and bean:

i hope god fucking strikes you down where you stand. i hope every single day of your miserable fucking life, you think about where he ended up, if he’s still alive, if anyone found him, if he ever got hit by a car or died alone of cancer and heart failure in a field somewhere. i hope you feel guilt for leaving him knowing he’d develop cancer and that he had heart worms, and knowing you did it BECAUSE of that. i hope you never fucking forget about the fact that you threw an INNOCENT LITTLE PUPPY out on the highway because you just didnt want to have anything to do with his illnesses, and i hope one day you find out what you did to us and this innocent little boy. he’s such a good fucking dog, he is so patient, kind, loving and gentle, and when he has bursts of energy to play he fucking goes, and now he has to die barely halfway through his lifespan because of your fucking negligence. he is laying outside on the porch right now, uncomfortable with fluids and blood backing up his intestines, coughing and huffing just to try and breathe. at the very least, if he were taken to the right shelter, he couldve been fucking cared for and given treatments to extend his life as much as possible, or at least given hospice care for however long he could live, which has now been shortened to 3 or 4 years. if you yourself knew this dog was inbred or you inbred him yourself, fuck you. i hope you get run over by a fucking truck. this breed can live from 12-16 years, that’s a LONG time for a dog like him, and you had to fucking ruin it all because of your own fucking preferences; you wanted the perfect dog. and you could’ve had him if you’d grown a fucking heart and actually gave a shit about animals beyond how they look aesthetically; as well, if you fucking actually gave a shit about your animals HEALTH and wanted to maintain it instead of apparently assuming he’d just be fine and healthy with all his vaccinations and that’d be the end of it. you do not deserve to own an animal if you dont even want to acknowledge it will sometimes need medical care, how fucking heartless are you? we never had enough money to take care of dixie’s failing health, and we always knew it’d be better to put her down, but my stepdad kept refusing. you had enough money to fucking breed or buy a blue show-quality engam bulldog and you still wouldnt fucking care for him after you found out what problems he had. fuck you. eat shit and die. i hope you never find peace from the guilt of knowing you fucking killed what became our dog because you’re selfish. my mother is physically sick with grief. i am physically sick with grief. i feel so bad that it’s as if i have the fucking flu. i was trying to talk with my mother about this situation earlier and i had to rush to leave because i felt like i was about to throw up if i didnt. everyone in this house has cried so much today it’s disgusting.

the only thing good about this is that bean came along for dixie when she needed him most, and became her helper and provider, giving her company and being a literal post to lean on for when she couldnt see where she was going. they’re going over the rainbow bridge tomorrow morning together, and in a way, this is probably the best outcome. at least bean wont have to grieve. dixie can see her old companion again (who died from a ruptured tumor in 2014) and bean can meet him, and they can all play and be together in that field in the sky.

my family will never have another dog again because of this pain this has caused us.

#personal #probably dont delete this #dont open this if youre sensitive to animal cruelty and death please #and vulgar descriptions of internal illness in dogs #and emetophobia #dont rb

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gffa · 7 years

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I’M STILL STUCK IN STAR WARS HELL COME JOIN ME IT’S A LOT OF FUN AND DEFINITELY NOT HEARTBREAKING. HONEST, I PROMISE. STAR WARS FIC RECS: ✦ Equinox by lilyconrad, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, sith!obi-wan, 48.2k wip During the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan and Anakin crash on a remote planet and take shelter in the ruins of a grand estate only to find they are not alone. ✦ And There Shall I Find by ambiguously, anakin & leia, 5.6k After her shuttle crashes on a desolate world, Leia has only one person to keep her company. ✦ Certain Point by esama, obi-wan & anakin/padme & dooku & cast, time travel, 15k wip In which Ben Kenobi travels back in time to a turning point in history. ✦ untitled by swhurtcomfort, obi-wan & anakin & cast, sickfic, h/c, ~1k Anakin wakes up to a world that’s still spinning. ✦ untitled by swhurtcomfort, obi-wan & anakin & kix & cody, sickfic, ~1k Just wanted to write something schmoopy and cute for @finish-the-clone-wars ‘s Writing Wednesday prompt: Virus ✦ Negotiation by Glare, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka & bail & cast, NSFW, dark!obi-wan, modern au, serial killer au, dark themes, 86.7k Over a year ago, Coruscant Police Detective Anakin Skywalker vanished without a trace while hunting the prolific serial killer known within the media as “The Negotiator”. Now, Skywalker has been found and rescued from captivity in a cabin deep within the Naboo wilderness, the only known survivor of an encounter with The Negotiator. The only question on anyone’s mind is: What happened during his time away? ✦ untitled by subskywalker, obi-wan/anakin NSFW, modern au, ~1k Anakin could only hold onto the counter in the restroom and try to keep quiet as Ben gripped his hips hard enough to leave bruises and fuck into him. ✦ Pursuit by Icse, obi-wan/anakin, nsfw, modern au, 8.5k wip Anakin Skywalker is a Grand Prix jumper transitioning into the Eventing world. While his scores are good during the cross-country and show jumping phases of Eventing, his dressage scores are abysmal. His sponsor sets him up as a working student for two-time Dressage Gold Medalist Ben Kenobi to help him pursue his dream of competing in the Olympics. ✦ untitled by darthcuddles, obi-wan/anakin, modern au, ~1k Anakin rushes through the hall of the local vet, a black and white kitten in his jacket, and the blood of the little creature streaming down his chest. The nails are dug deeply into his skin, but he ignores his own pain for the little meows coming from the kitten. ✦ untitled by frost-and-stars, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, ~1k gffa asked: SEXY MEME #15 - Make sure you leave a mark., Obikin. Anakin likes feeling the marks Obi-Wan leaves on him (biting? finger-shaped bruises on his hips? rope marks from where they pressed into his skin?), always urging for more, because he wants to see them the next day and be reminded! ✦ untitled by mthingthepoint, obi-wan/anakin/padme, dragon!anakin, ~1k puelhathnofury asked: YOU OWE ME THE PREQUELS DRAGON OT3 ✦ Sky Walkers by esama, anakin & rex & hevy & fives & echo, 3.8k In which some clones rescue a Jedi in the deserts of Tatooine (aka, Jedi as a species of living spaceships because, y'know, why not? ✦ Identity by madame_alexandra, 353.9k A distress signal reaches Coruscant after the Empire’s demise, claiming to be the beacon of Bail Organa. what would the reappearance of Leia’s adoptive father mean for her life in a post ROTJ context. What would he think of Han Solo, and what could he tell her about the dark shadow of her heritage? H/L; significantly AU, I suppose. ✦ Disappointment by Icse, obi-wan/anakin, au, a/b/o, 1.6k All Anakin wants is a child. As an omega and the Prince Consort with access to the best doctors in the Galaxy, it shouldn’t be this hard to get pregnant. He can’t help but feel like a disappointment at yet another failure. full details + recs under the cut

✦ Equinox by lilyconrad, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, sith!obi-wan, 48.2k wip During the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan and Anakin crash on a remote planet and take shelter in the ruins of a grand estate only to find they are not alone. Chapter 9: This is an update rec and will focus on this chapter, rather than the fic as a whole, and will contain SPOILERS by this point. So, this is a chapter where Some Shit Happens, maybe not explosively yet, but certainly and important and massively looming for what it’s going to mean–and it’s all done in such a way that it’s clear that this is exactly where it was going since the beginning. One of my favorite things about lilyconrad’s writing is that I feel this sense often from her stories, that I have a few guesses, I can maybe tell a bit of the framework, but I can never guess exactly, I’m always surprised by something, and yet I look back, even having analyzed everything with ridiculous zeal, and it was obvious that she’d laid the groundwork for it. I figured the Sith versions weren’t gone, they’d pop up in some manner, but I didn’t quite expect them to become real like this–or whatever it’s going to mean! I could guess that it was Isten who walked out to meet Obi-Wan in the rain to give him a cloak, but the scene between Veris and Anakin still surprised the hell out of me. And, god, that is so satisfying, to be able to have some guess about the shape of things, but the details surprise me, some stuff still hits me out of nowhere while being a perfect fit, like, okay, sure, this fic is tailored to exactly what appeals to me! But it’s honestly one of the author’s best for me, especially in terms of sheer storytelling structure. I love that I’m still analying things–was it the sex that made them real?? because I noticed that the positions used by Obi-Wan and Anakin were verysimilar to the first time Anakin saw Isten and Veris in the gardens, which thenmade the line of how Veris couldn’t do anything unless Obi-Wan had done it first stand out in new relief. Obviously, the Sith were always about reflections of pieces of them, not the whole of them, but the darker and bent versions of some part of them, so Obi-Wan watching Veris fucking Isten, the way his thoughts turned to his own past experiences and some young noble from a past encounter riding him the way Isten rode Veris, the intimacy of Isten’s glove being off, all that takes on new meaning and makes me wonder about the future, if that’s what’s next for them or if their paths are diverging now that the Sith are real! And is all of this what the Shadow was in the house or is there still something more? Is it the Force in a Nexus here or something more self-aware? Either one offers such intriguing possibilities!! One of the other details that jumped out at me as being perfect, is how precious the Jedi are to them, which appeals so much to me, yessss, because it fits with the themes so much better, that these aren’t canon Sith, these are something else, these are reflections of the Jedi given life, so they come from the Jedi, of course they’d be precious, of course they love each other and so the Sith would love them as well, Anakin is still Anakin to Veris and Obi-Wan is still Obi-Wan to Isten, after all. And their mirrored selves may be somewhat loathesome for the parts they hate about themselves, but they are still precious because they are themselves. It makes the knowing each other all the more delicious, that Veris’ final line of how he’s not going to hurt Anakin, but he thinks Anakin might like it if he did all the more tension-laden and satisfying, because it’s not about disinterest or anything, but a different kind of danger, the kind that lures me right into the story and various dynamics all over again. The tension of the story is so nicely done as well, that it’s wound together with the way these characters would behave–that Obi-Wan doesn’t register Isten as Isten instead of Anakin, because he’s in his own thoughts, because Isten behaves like Anakin would in that moment, even when I could tell the difference, because it made sense with what I knew that Obi-Wan didn’t, I wholly believed that Obi-Wan wouldn’t. Especially caught up in thoughts of his night with Anakin and, oh, I love that, yes, it’s perfect that he didn’t regret it for having done it, that it’s not like it’s against the Jedi Code (because that’s factually wrong ♥) but instead about exactly what it should be and why the Jedi would be concerned–not because sex or love are wrong (they’re not), but because it puts his priorities and focus out of balance. Because Obi-Wan recognizes the part of himself that is possessive about Anakin, that’s wild and ready to be taken off the hook Obi-Wan has it on, that he’s wary and afraid of his own fire, because he knows what it’s capable of. Because he loves Anakin so deeply (and so much that it blinded him in canon, that was the problem, not the love itself, and this reflection or extension of that is so good for me here!) that balance will be incredibly difficult to come by for them, that is what he’s concerned about. That it’s exactly as Obi-Wan would do–he meditates on it, doesn’t knee-jerk reject it, but instead analyzes it and lets it settle. YES AND MORE YES. So, yes, I enjoyed this chapter a lot and had a ton to say about it and there were some delicious moments (Isten swinging a leg up over Veris to straddle him, now that they’re real and free, was especially nice, thank you) and so much that I’m still chewing on and so many lovely moments of character insight that absolutely nailed who these characters are, so that, yes, every word of this unecessarily long rec (that’s probably not even of use to people who aren’t already reading! orz) was actually indeed necessary. ♥ ✦ Equinox by lilyconrad, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, sith!obi-wan, 48.2k wip During the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan and Anakin crash on a remote planet and take shelter in the ruins of a grand estate only to find they are not alone. Chapter 10: This is an update rec and will be focusing on this chapter, rather than the fic as a whole! Also, there will be SPOILERS by this point! Oh, man, this chapter was intense and I could hardly unwind from the sheer tension of reading it, the confrontation between the newly real Sith versions against the Jedi versions and something else! I didn’t so much as glance up from the screen the entire time I was reading because I couldn’t look away, that the Shadow crept into the room with them, wrapped itself around Obi-Wan and the fic found that line between having an impact and being too over the top, that instead it was in the sweet spot of moody and atmospheric and creepy and would be terrifying for the people experiencing. But, oh, what this fic does is makes the characters (and me, the reader!) uneasy about what’s happening here, that the Sith versions aren’t what we expect or precisely know what to do with, we don’t know their motivations, and little pieces that we get along the way aren’t necessarily wholly trustworthy, in a way that’s been built up from the beginning. All of the structure of the story is something I’ve been enjoying and legitimately delighted by/respecting as a story, even as it hits my id right on. But, oh, yes, it definitely hits my id, too. Veris leaning over Anakin, who is paryalzed by seeing Obi-Wan’s face and just the way he reacts to someone that he loves being so commanding and lethal, the way Obi-Wan isn’t fully himself in the scene, that the darkness (whatever it is) creeps over him and into his mind and makes him so much more dangerous and not himself, but in a way that works with whatever is going on in this house, oh, I ate that up like it was the most delicious thing. Because it steals in through his protectiveness for Anakin, that the thought of Anakin being hurt is what allows it in, ohhhh, yes. And then!! AND THEN. The Sith versions finding the Jedi versions precious because… well, possibly because they’re who their beloved came from, who they themselves came from, because who knows, but they do and that is something I am so wholly here for. Veris’ reactions to Isten being in genuine danger, that the themes of his character and Obi-Wan’s are so interesting to play with here, that he provokes and cuts with just the right words, not realizing (even when he himself sprung from Obi-Wan) just want he’s unleashing. And yet this does not take away from the absolute core of who Obi-Wan Kenobi is, a Master Jedi and someone who loves, someone who is grounded in good, that they’re both parts of him, that Obi-Wan is a character about knowing that darkness in himself and not letting it control him, and Veris is not him and yet is a reflection of him in a way, and I love all of it. That it’s tied up in the relationship between Obi-Wan and Anakin–the Shadow sneaks in through that love, that Veris shows something much more real when Isten is threatened and possibly hurt, that it’s tied up with Anakin’s healing (because Veris, born of darkness, probably can’t?) of Isten (or at least checking on him) because of that love between them. Everything is tied up in that love, that Obi-Wan loves Anakin and Anakin loves Obi-Wan. And it’s such a natural, organic progression–like, two chapters I was thinking Anakin was the one that the Shadow would sneak into, but then no! It’s Obi-Wan! And it made absolute sense to me! And I still am not sure what it wants, if it wants them all dead, wants them all sundered into darkness, if it wants Anakin’s power, if it wants Obi-Wan’s power, or what. I love that the moment of truce between Anakin and Veris was based on seeing Veris’ love for Isten, that of course that’s what makes him more of a person to Anakin. I love everything here and the mystery of what’s going on, just what is in that house, and where it’s all going and how things will end. It’s so good and this chapter still has me feeling wound up from how beautifully intense it was! ✦ And There Shall I Find by ambiguously, anakin & leia, 5.6k After her shuttle crashes on a desolate world, Leia has only one person to keep her company. Oh, this was a really lovely, bittersweet in just the right ways, kind of piece. It’s exactly what it says–Leia crashes on a remote world and hits her head so she can’t ignore the Force Ghost trailing around after her like she usually does. And it’s clear how much she hates him and how much anger is still in her, how much fire she still has in her, even as she has so much love still, that it breaks her heart that she was trying to meet Ben again, that he’s going to think she just didn’t show up, and all she has to get through it, is the ghost of the father that she never wanted, not her real father that she does. Anakin trying to respect her wishes and yet so dearly wanting more with her, the bits of humor and trying to help her, the bitterness of their situation mixed with the sweetness of it, is spot on to the characters, it really is just the right amounts of everything in all directions and was a very satisfying read! ✦ Certain Point by esama, obi-wan & anakin/padme & dooku & cast, time travel, 15k wip In which Ben Kenobi travels back in time to a turning point in history. Oh, I love time travel fic and dropping Obi-Wan back into the beginning of the Clone Wars has me hooked already! I do have a few caveats in that the fic kind of really kind of seems to misunderstand the Jedi and their ideals (at least as far as I’ve read!), as well as I’m not sure I buy that Obi-Wan Kenobi would express some of the things he has (though, a lot I’m attributing to Anakin and Dooku’s points of view, which absolutely does make sense!), as well as it’s trying to stitch old Jedi Apprentice events to The Clone Wars canon and it doesn’t quite work, as well as is wrong about some factual stuff like Obi-Wan says Sifo-Dyas created the clone arm by order of the Senate in the movie. But if you can roll with those things (and this is genuinely not a drubbing on the fic, merely that I want to encourage people past these things! and that I tend to notice things more the better the writing is, because a lesser fic wouldn’t stand out so nicely), the writing is engaging as all hell and I absolutely have feelings and I greatly enjoyed the scenes between Obi-Wan and Anakin, especially Anakin’s sense of growing quiet panic that Obi-Wan seems distant, feels like he’s not there anymore, and it really captures the sense of a young adult who is on the cusp of indepence and the terror that he feels, especially for someone like Anakin who is so very needy and emotionally dependent. I’m also greatly enjoying Dooku’s view of Obi-Wan and how he wants to turn Obi-Wan to the Dark Side but recognizes that he can’t and the way his character feels almost unsettled about it, like he’s seeing some things about himself that the canon Dooku never had the impetus to do. The plot of the story in the four chapters I’d read as of the writing of this rec carried me through, so even when I had some caveats and doubts about it, there was no way I was putting it down. The writing itself really is spectacular and so, so addictive and the author certainly knows how to write a story that I eat up with a spoon and makes me desperate to know what’s going to happen next! The plot itself is very solidly done and the time travel is very well done in that I am so, so here for knowing how this moment is what can be the changing moment! Definitely one of the fics I’m most excited about right now! ✦ untitled by swhurtcomfort, obi-wan & anakin & cast, sickfic, h/c, ~1k Anakin wakes up to a world that’s still spinning. This is the fic I read first from these authors (though, I believe I’ve enjoyed their work elsewhere, too! ♥) and it’s the one that immediately made me fall in love all over again, that it’s such a good Anakin voice, how grumpy and bratty he can be, but it’s in such an adorable and charming way for it, that it’s obviously layered over a deep and incredible love. The way Obi-Wan reverts to calling him “Padawan” when he’s sick, the way he gently touches Anakin who is so miserably sick, it’s so telling and spot on for the character, you can feel how much Obi-Wan loves him in a very Obi-Wan Kenobi sort of way. It’s a fic that hit at my id and all the things I wanted out of h/c sickfic, but is also genuinely well written and spot on. It’s short but it was the perfect length and so very satisfying! ✦ untitled by swhurtcomfort, obi-wan & anakin & kix & cody, sickfic, ~1k Just wanted to write something schmoopy and cute for @finish-the-clone-wars ‘s Writing Wednesday prompt: Virus This was another lovely fic from swhurtcomfort, this time with Obi-Wan under the weather and, of course, with that incredible tank nature of his he doesn’t go down easily, which frustrates the people around him, but there’s still a sense of things not being too silly about it or over the top, instead it feels much more grounded than that, and so I was even more in love! And, oh, when Anakin shows up, that Obi-Wan is more gentle with him, that there’s a different dynamic there, that also a bit that it’s that the Jedi are just kind of weird to outsiders, all of it is so very lovely. ✦ Negotiation by Glare, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka & bail & cast, NSFW, dark!obi-wan, modern au, serial killer au, dark themes, 86.7k Over a year ago, Coruscant Police Detective Anakin Skywalker vanished without a trace while hunting the prolific serial killer known within the media as “The Negotiator”. Now, Skywalker has been found and rescued from captivity in a cabin deep within the Naboo wilderness, the only known survivor of an encounter with The Negotiator. The only question on anyone’s mind is: What happened during his time away? Final Chapters: I’ve written recs for this fic as it was in progress, but now that it’s finished I’m going to aim for one that’s a more general rec for the entire fic at once! This is a fic that you definitely need to roll with the concept with when you walk in the door, that this is not the Obi-Wan Kenobi of canon, but instead that he’s a negative image of the character we love, that everything good about Obi-Wan is dark and terrible in this version of Kenobi, that it’s a version of him that is similar on the surface, where they share the trappings (the politeness, the formality, the predatory abilities under the kind surface) but presents instead an Obi-Wan Kenobi who is as dark as the canon one is good. If you can roll with that, this is a fascinating look at obsession and stalking and Stockholm Syndrome and that the fic warmly embraces these things, that it finds a balance between not trying to justify any of this with appealing to what I’m here for in the relationship between these two characters. This is a fic that, yes, is about breaking down Anakin Skywalker until he goes along with whatever Obi-Wan wants, but it’s also a fic about something warm between them, something charismatic and hellishly engaging for me to read! And that’s where this fic gets me! All the things that I might have been wary about before stepping into it, that it’s so different from the canon I know and love, that this is such a different take on these characters, that it’s about murder and serial killings, is balanced by how there’s something that makes me root for these characters to be together, for Anakin to stop struggling between his two worlds, for me to be able to just dive right into the beautiful trash fire that these characters’ lives are. That there’s a glimmer of something I recognize still there and that I hold onto, that’s what really won my heart with this fic. That and it’s just incredibly engaging, that it doesn’t drag things out just to drag them out, but instead the pacing really allowed for showing the long journey these characters took, from the beginning to where they ultimately ended up, to show the how of Anakin’s slow breaking apart, in a way that a 20k fic just couldn’t have done. It was the perfect length and ended exactly how I would have wanted things to end and hit so, so many of my buttons along the way. I’m not kidding when I say there’s something incredibly charismatic about this story, that it appeals to the dark fic desires I have, while not trying to pretend to be something it’s not, yet still getting at that shipper heart of mine. It also has so many moments where I was just incredibly invested, where I wound up rooting for these characters (and I do think there’s a similarity to the NBC Hannibal in a really good way, it captured that same sense of heroes and villains and the connection between them even when they disagree morally) and was practically tied up into a pretzel by the end of the fic when I just so badly wanted them to somehow end up together. There’s also some really spectacularly satisfying sex, that chapter where there’s this moment of pause right before Obi-Wan finally pushes into him, that moment that is just full of everything that this means and lets the weight of it really sink in, that went along with the ridiculously hot porn, and that just made the whole thing better. All of this was a super satisfying fic and a hell of an experience that I’m glad I got to enjoy! ✦ untitled by subskywalker, obi-wan/anakin NSFW, modern au, ~1k Anakin could only hold onto the counter in the restroom and try to keep quiet as Ben gripped his hips hard enough to leave bruises and fuck into him. This ficlet came along at exactly the right time for what I needed to get me interested in reading Star Wars fic again, because it’s pwp and really only about the sex, it’s one of those that’s designed to appeal right to my id in that way that satisfies me, and, boy, did it do exactly that. Anakin getting fucked over a bathroom counter while Obi-Wan tells him to keep watching himself in the mirror, the slightly rough edge to the sex, the slight undercurrent of d/s to it, the satisfying and super hot sex, all of it just made my brain light up exactly as it was supposed to, god bless. ✦ Pursuit by Icse, obi-wan/anakin, nsfw, modern au, 8.5k wip Anakin Skywalker is a Grand Prix jumper transitioning into the Eventing world. While his scores are good during the cross-country and show jumping phases of Eventing, his dressage scores are abysmal. His sponsor sets him up as a working student for two-time Dressage Gold Medalist Ben Kenobi to help him pursue his dream of competing in the Olympics. Speaking of fics that have sparked me back into wanting to read more! This is another one that hits me right in the id, where it’s this soft-hearted modern AU fic that is clearly a work of love from the author and designed to appeal to what I want out of it, it’s just warm and soft and kind, even when it’s kind of angsty. But a fluffy kind of angst, which is exactly what I wanted! It’s a fic that’s meant to be picked up when you want something like a fuzzy blanket to wrap around you, when you just want an AU where it’s about the author’s love of horses and riding, where Anakin is a bit of a brat, where there’s flirting and pining on both sides, where the pacing is reasonably lengthy (and will probably be 15k when all finished, I guess) without being drawn out, and it’s just sweet and fun. It’s one of those fics that runs full-tilt at all the soft things in Obikin fandom and gives them the biggest hug and has such charm to it, that there’s such care and affection here, that the horse riding stuff is genuinely fun to read about and, ugh, I just love this and it’s like sinking into a warm, comforting bath when I get a new chapter. ✦ untitled by darthcuddles, obi-wan/anakin, modern au, ~1k Anakin rushes through the hall of the local vet, a black and white kitten in his jacket, and the blood of the little creature streaming down his chest. The nails are dug deeply into his skin, but he ignores his own pain for the little meows coming from the kitten. This is another fic that I read at the right time to perk me back up, because I just want kind and soft things right now, I want cute stories where these two love each other or are just meeting and are wildly attracted to each other and there’s an instant connection and such charm to the way it’s written. It’s a story for when you want a warm, fluffy blanket, a bite-sized ficlet that’s just really cute! ✦ untitled by frost-and-stars, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, ~1k gffa asked: SEXY MEME #15 - Make sure you leave a mark., Obikin. Anakin likes feeling the marks Obi-Wan leaves on him (biting? finger-shaped bruises on his hips? rope marks from where they pressed into his skin?), always urging for more, because he wants to see them the next day and be reminded! Oh, this may be short, a little over 250 words, but it was exactly what I needed at the time it was posted and it’s beautifully written, frost-and-stars has a lovely way with the imagery in this piece, and lovely characterization as well in just a few lines. That Anakin is so greedy here, wants all the more even when he’s already getting fucked, wants the bruises and bites so that he can feel them again later, can remember them and know they were given by Obi-Wan, wants to push himself back onto Obi-Wan all the harder, even as Obi-Wan is already taking him apart, oh, it’s just my favorite Anakin. The desperate, greedy one who loves so deeply and wants this so very, very much. Beautiful and super hot, bless. ✦ untitled by mthingthepoint, obi-wan/anakin/padme, dragon!anakin, ~1k puelhathnofury asked: YOU OWE ME THE PREQUELS DRAGON OT3 Oh, I really enjoyed this! It’s short and of course I would have loved more, but as a snippet ficlet there’s such lovely imagery here, the way Obi-Wan and Padme balance this wild, powerful creature that is Anakin, that they help soothe over his rough spots, and you can see why they fall in love with this brilliant creature. It’s lovely for how they want him as well, and how much it caught my imagination and started spinning things out of it. A lovely read! ✦ Sky Walkers by esama, anakin & rex & hevy & fives & echo, 3.8k In which some clones rescue a Jedi in the deserts of Tatooine (aka, Jedi as a species of living spaceships because, y'know, why not? This is one of those fics that’s delightfully weird and knows it, just embraces that and has a fun, light-hearted time about it! It explains what you need to know, but doesn’t go any further than it needs to, so instead it’s just this fun, odd read that’s engaging, where Jedi are living spaceships and the clone squad comes across Anakin on Tatooine and it’s adorable and sad and weird and fun all at the same time! ✦ Identity by madame_alexandra, 353.9k A distress signal reaches Coruscant after the Empire’s demise, claiming to be the beacon of Bail Organa. what would the reappearance of Leia’s adoptive father mean for her life in a post ROTJ context. What would he think of Han Solo, and what could he tell her about the dark shadow of her heritage? H/L; significantly AU, I suppose. I picked this fic up because I was really curious to see what a fic that brought Bail Organa back would be like and I found a story that is very, very well-written, though it feels more Legends-based and it’s very, very much a Han/Leia story. I think, if you’re a fan of the pairing, this fic is going to be absolute catnip, you’ll roll around in it and have stuff to read for days and it will keep you totally enthralled! For those on the fence, the fic does prioritize that relationship above everything else and I found myself wishing that the other people in Leia’s life had some kind of narrative weight to them, because this is basically entirely about the Han/Leia relationship, how they are everything to each other, how they become each other’s whole world, how their time together is full of banter and love and everything else they’re trying to process after the war–but I couldn’t fault the fic for it, it’s tagged the right way and it’s obvious the fic is having a great time and embracing what it wants to embrace, and if this had been the ship of my heart, I’d have written a five paragraph long flailing screed about it and nothing could have stopped me! I recommend it because I think it will appeal to Han/Leia fans and I did enjoy the parts I read (though, it took about 50k for them to find Bail, this is a very slow burn of a fic, though, I wouldn’t say it drags! the whole point is the journey there) and it’s a nice fic to have in the fandom! ✦ Disappointment by Icse, obi-wan/anakin, au, a/b/o, 1.6k All Anakin wants is a child. As an omega and the Prince Consort with access to the best doctors in the Galaxy, it shouldn’t be this hard to get pregnant. He can’t help but feel like a disappointment at yet another failure. This is another fic that’s about embracing a trope and a thing that has personal meaning for the author, you can feel that coming through, but it was such a sweet and kind-hearted story, that it was about working through something and the crushing feelings that of course Anakin would feel, how he has these mood spirals when things don’t go well, and that can be cathartic to write and/or read for the audience. But that ultimately it was a hopeful story, that Anakin is going through these difficult feelings and it’s not like a hug can just magic them away or anything, but Obi-Wan is so in love with him and devoted to him that they’ll find a way to muddle through together. It was lovely and perfect exactly as it was, I’m so glad the author shared it with us.

#obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #leia organa #han solo #obikin #fic recs #star wars fic recs

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