#who cares about joel and etho? these are My boat boys

[raticalshoez]

Man, there is just something so fascinating to me about the Boat Boys because I think their relationship has always been akin to like...the rockiest of waters (pun intended). I've just been thinking so much about it...

In 3rd Life, funnily enough, one of their first interactions was just them riding a boat together. In Last Life, Joel ended Etho's series. Even before being soulbonded they've had that sort of "me and the bestie/can't stand his fakeass" dynamic.

If anything was evident in Double Life, it's that they had fun together. It's safe to say they probably weren't the most loyal to one another, mainly due to Etho and his Bdubs withdrawal, but it would be wrong to say that they didn't enjoy each other's company. They both have the urge to cause chaos, but one's more upfront about it and the other is more subtle. They complimented each other and balanced out the other, and when the time came around, they died together poetically.

Limited Life was definitely...a season for Joel and Etho interactions. This season was filled with animosity, and constant jabs, and bitter callbacks to a past life. Boat Boys this season were just killing or insulting each other left and right, not finding a moment of comfort or piece around each other.

Then there's Secret Life. This one in particular makes me kind of insane because there's both the animosity and bite to their words when they're interacting with one another, but there was also sincerity. For a brief moment, these two were able to express genuine care that they still had for one another, and that's just crazy to me. Both Joel and Etho's characters don't know sincerity and always deal more mushy, heartfelt things awkwardly, so this was CRAZY for me. And it always hits harder for me because I've always just imagined Joel and Etho's relationship to just be a very strong, platonic bond. They have people who they are definitely closer to; Joel has people like Lizzie, Grian and Jimmy, and Etho has people like Bdubs, Cleo, and Tango. Those are people that they tend to naturally gravitate towards, but the two of them will always end up crossing paths. And well, that's what being soulmates is really about, right? It's not really about romance; it's about being bound to find this particular person in every universe, no matter what.

Out of all the people on the server, I never expected it to be them. Etho and Joel, the two guys who never seemed to be able to let go of their soul bond when everyone else had moved on to some capacity.

It's like how Martyn never left winter. It's like how Jimmy and Tango will always be each others' ranchers even though they no longer reside at the ranch. It's like how Scar and Grian know monopolies better than anyone. Cleo will always be caught up on BigB's betrayal and Lizzie will remain bitter about Cleo's destructive tendencies towards her home. Impulse will never let go of Bdubs' betrayal. It's the way Scott seems somewhat attached to literally ALL of his exes. The lifers just cannot be normal about each other and every new season adds to their insanity regarding one another.

If you've reached the end of this, I commend you. I'm not adding anything new to this conversation, I'm just yapping and blabbling about the Minecraft series that changed my life and altered my brain chemistry. These worms eat at my neurons everyday and I just HAVE to tell somebody, ANYBODY about my insanity.

#trafficblr #ethoslab #smallishbeans #double life smp #secret life smp #have i just become a boat boys fan account what is this #i blacked out and i just has words on my screen #will anyone even read this thing all the way through or will i just appear mentally ill #it is 2 am and i am just lying in bed writing this on my phone #boat boys #forgot that tag again

[tubbytarchia]

why do you acknowledge joel's boundries on shipping and then still ship him im so confused

Using read-more for easier avoidance for people who dgaf

Because of people who will inevitably come and white knight for him. What I think is that when he said what he said in that one old video clip (that he finds it weird to be shipped with anyone but Lizzie), he didn't realize exactly what was even being asked of him and that he really doesn't give that much of a fuck. He's the one who keeps the "neck kisses" and boat boys bit going, he made two neck kisses playlists with a bunch of songs about sex (never change Joel), he constantly has shippy exchanges with people like Jimmy, he and Jimmy had a whole "babymaking" ordeal in Empires and had casual suggestive exchanges with Sausage for an extended period of time regarding their child Hermes thing, his friends and Lizzie have acknowledged him being shipped with no issue, eg Lizzie saying that he ships Jimmy and Joel (or maybe it was Boat Boys. Knowing Lizzie it could have been both, she loves joking about that lol, especially to Joel in streams) or his Hermitcraft friends making similar comments about him and Etho

If Joel didn't fully get what shipping entailed back then, be probably does now and I'm inclined to believe that he doesn't care enough to say anything or he finds it funny to not say anything. He is constantly asked about how he feels about it on streams and he always ignores it, and I don't believe in a million years that it's because he's uncomfortable, otherwise he would have said as much. He just recently acknowledged "Tumblr found my neck kisses playlist", there's absolutely no way he doesn't know of the shipping too and is choosing not to comment. I can't stop it if people wanna white knight for him, I know they always will but that's my stance on the that 👍

#blabber #might delete later idk #kinda wanna have it here as my reasoning but if it invites more white knights into my inbox then Id rather nkt

[squidinkedcreative]

i am sick again (i stg its the weather patterns here or smth bc when i lived in a different climate for 4 yrs, I HARDLY EVER GOT SICK!!!! i still mask everywhere !!!! wtf!!!) so naturally i am thinking abt my blorbos…

watching older joel and etho content has me feeling so many things

JOEL BUILDING THEM A BOAT TO LIVE IN,,,, IN DOUBLE LIFE

and etho being so encouraging yet still teasing to joel the entire time. it was so endearing ngl lmaoo

i havent seen either of their newest episodes of current hc but i have seen a handful of things abt it 💀 oh maaaaaan etho is leaning into the “little shit” part of their dynamic so hard its so funny

it also all has me thinking abt head canons n stuff… so heres some of those heh

-etho comes down w a cold and hes miserable but trying rly hard not to show it, n joel comes in n makes him some food n gets him some warm towels and makes sure he knows hes allowed to take a rest now n then, especially when sick

-etho is not a menthol enjoyer, but joel loves it. he loves vapo rub and menthol cough drops/tea, and it used to make etho nauseous, but he’s slowly beginning to enjoy the smell of it bc it reminds him of joel, but more specifically whiny sick joel who’s very needy

-OH YEAH. joel is so the type to be extra whiny and needy when he’s sick, whereas etho is the opposite. he pretends hes fine until hes literally collapsing lmfao he could have a high grade fever and still insist he can keep working lmfao meanwhile the millisecond joel feels slightly under the weather he’s whining about it and basically throwing himself at etho to take care of him

-i like tho think that gem would stop by with some sick care package stuff if both of them were to get sick, like soup and meds but also comfort stuff as well like snacks, media to watch, maybe a handmade blanket too heh

-etho is immunocompromised teehee so anytime joel gets sick, etho ends up getting sick 2x as hard, thats also why he masks all the time!!!!!!!! but sometimes the sickies r just unavoidable ough

anyway yeah idk what this is i feel feverish and delirious even tho the dr said i had a normal temp this afternoon hope u enjoyed these potentially incorherent smalletho/boat boys ramblings

#boat boys #smalletho #smallishbeans #ethoslab #hermitcraft joel #hermitcraft etho #hermitcraft smallishbeans #hermit headcanons #etho headcanons #smallishbeans headcanons #boat boys headcanons #squid speaks

[dmwrites]

“It’s not fair.” Joel muttered to himself. He was watching, not stalking, watching, Jimmy and Tango walking around Tumble Town together, chatting and laughing and looking like they were having a lot of fun. Joel hated fun, more specifically them. So, he flew down from his hiding spot to grouch at them. “Oi! Idiot toy and ice guy! You’re both so annoying!”

“JOEL!” Jimmy yelled, shaking his fist out of instinct.

“Woah, woah, big guy! You can’t talk to Jim like that!” Tango strode forward, frowning and crossing his arms at the god. “What’s got your toga in a bunch, huh?”

“I don’t need a reason to hate, I’m a god and he’s an annoying little toy. And you, ice boy, are his little soulmate, so you too will suffer.” Joel sneered at them.

“Jimmy, you know what?” Tango said thoughtfully. “I think that Joel here is projecting his anger onto us, because Etho didn’t come to visit him.”

Jimmy gasped. “Tango you’re a genius!” He started laughing. “Oh my god, Joel’s jealous!”

“Am not!” Joel said defensively. “I could care less about him, he was just some guy, I would never care what he thinks or why he didn’t come to see me even though you two morons got hang out with each other. I’m not jealous!”

Jimmy and Tango were laughing now, and Joel huffed and puffed at them, feeling how red his face must be. Tango was the first to stop, and spoke again.

“Listen, dude, you’re literally a god! Just, like, summon Etho here or something. I’m sure he’s just in his singleplayer world or something, hasn’t even noticed that the hermits left hermitcraft.”

“He can’t do that, he’s weak! He’s a weak little man!” Jimmy laughs turned into screams when Joel hit him with lightning.

It wasn’t too bad of an idea though, Joel thought as he flew back to Stratos. Perhaps if he prayed to his fellow gods, he could be granted some extra power to jump over to another world, just enough to grab Etho. He hated that Tango had read him like a book, but it was true, he missed his soulmate, and had sulked when he found out that Etho wasn’t among the people that had come through the rift.

“Oh great and powerful Peril.” Joel stood in the peaceful temple he’d built for some god he could hardly remember. And he wasn’t weaker then them, just to be clear, he was just collaborating with the other gods, because he just loved teamwork. “I don’t know if you know, but I once was in a relation ship, like an actual wooden boat that looked so cute, with a guy called Etho. You might know him, he’s kinda a big deal, super mysterious and cool. We were soulmates, I showed him everything he knows, well, you know how it goes. Anyway, I want to bring him here, but I need some-” and here Joel looked around conspiratorially, like someone would be spying on him from the bushes. The only person around was Hermes, who was playing in the water a ways away, “extra power to get him. Could you please help?”

There was a moment of silence, and Joel stood with his head bowed. And then, Joel felt a heaviness enter his skin, and he knew that the prayer had worked. He snapped his fingers, and a portal appeared in midair, rippling in the breeze.

“Hermes! I’ll be right back, son!” Joel called. Hermes looked up and waved. Joel stepped into the portal, closing his eyes and concentrating on Etho, his mask and his laugh and his sarcasm.

And when he opened his eyes again, he was in a field, and there was a man with a shock of white hair with his back to him. He was surrounded by bits of redstone machines, and Joel grinned.

“Honey, I’m home!”

Etho yelped and turned around, pulling out his sword. “Wha- who- hold on, Joel?”

“The one and only!” Joel couldn’t stop smiling.

“What- hold on, hold on. Why are you dressed like that, and why do you have a beard, and, most importantly, why are you here?” Etho cocked his head and approached Joel slowly.

“Listen, we don’t have much time before my extra power gives out.” Joel told him. “Long story short I’m a god now, surprise, and all of your hermit guys came through some rift into empires- you remember empires, right- and you weren’t there and I was upset because the silly toy got his soulmate back- come with me!” Joel grabbed Etho by the arm and dragged him into the portal, giving Etho no time to respond.

They appeared back in Peril’s temple in an instant, and Joel sighed as the heaviness in his skin left him, and the portal vanished. Etho gripped Joel’s arm and looked around.

“Where am I? Did I have some bad mushroom soup or something?”

“No, no, my friend, this is my kingdom, Stratos! I am super cool and hot, I’m a god, baby.” Joel spread his arms so Etho could behold it. “You’re impressed, I can tell.”

Etho’s breathing was slowing, and he let go of Joel. “It was just very sudden, all of this. You know, I was trying to figure out a redstone machine that could invert-”

“Hermes! Come meet your dad’s old fling!” Joel called.

“Dad?” Etho asked, distracted at once. Hermes came running over and waved right into Etho’s face. “Hi there. Is this your father?” Hermes nodded, hugging Joel’s leg for a moment before running off again. “You had a kid?”

“Oh, yes, with Daddy Sausage, it’s a funny story actually, we-”

“Sorry, who?” Etho interrupted, eyebrows raised high, a laugh making his voice crack.

“Oh, shut up.” Joel muttered. “Listen, I did not do all of this just for you to laugh at me for what I call the man I co-parent with. My builds are in the sky and amazing, and I am so tall and hot. Right?”

Etho eyed him over. “Still shorter then me.” He said.

“Etho, I swear!” Joel said, but he couldn’t help but smile. Etho was back with him, and it felt right.

#November 16 2022 #fic #hc x empires #smallishbeans #Etho is also there #boat boys #team ranchers mention at the beginning #long post

[flyingfisharejustbirds]

i have more ideas for my stratos boat boys au

hermes absolutely adores etho. when ever his dads can’t play with him he always goes to etho who will stop what he’s doing just to give the kid company. etho much to joel’s dismay started teaching hermes redstone. joel didn’t really care about the potential danger (they were gods after all) it was more that he didn’t like that hermes never had interest in building despite his efforts. hermes even started calling etho his third dad. that was a weird thing to have to explain to joel and sausage.

etho and joel’s relation was awkward to say the least. they both wanted to wrap themselves around each other like they had back in double life, but neither had to courage to ask if it was okay. it’s took THREE months for joel to break grabbing etho and pulling him against his chest. desperately pulling ethos mask away so he could kiss him. etho melted into joel’s arms happy that they both were back to where they belong. even if their roles were switched their feelings didn’t.

that’s the end for now but i will be back. next time we’re gonna take a look at what our favorite harem protagonist boy toy is doing!

#ethoslab #boat boys #smallishbeans #smalletho #hermes #double life shipping #empires joel #empires smp #double life etho #if the ship burns everything burns #one of many brain rot

[aviangrian]

oo sunset please?

Sunset: a chunk of description that I’m proud of

this is fun because i have a couple! there’s lots of small moments but they instantly came to mind

this one is from my etho and bdubs fic, “it seems like once again you’ve had to greet me with goodbye”, which is also my favorite play on words i’ve like, ever

Etho aims his bow for Grian’s heart, because what means the most to a man who pretends to have no cares or attachments in the world? That title belongs to Etho now, having spent way too long acting as if Bdubs was just his partner, not showing him the love he deserved, and the answer to that question is the heart.

GoodTimeWithScar was shot by Etho

there’s also this part from the same fic about when bdubs turned red:

The first thing Bdubs felt was the turn of his stomach. Tango’s panicked yell coursed through his ears, as did the wind as he plummeted to the floor of the Nether. He reached out with his hands, but he hardly scratched the red bricks. There was nothing he could do to slow his fall. He shouts and thrusts his shield out, but there is no stopping the inevitable.

As he made his way back through the Nether portal and to the fortress, he thought about the implications of being on red.

in “tiny tangerine speckles painted in your eyes”, there’s the part where grian kills scar and the “weight of his vulnerabilities” is literally grian. like grian in his lap is that weight but it means so much

A heartbroken apology is the last thing Scar hears before Grian launches himself at him, pinning him to the ground. Scar tries to struggle, he tries moving, but there’s nothing he could do against an enchanted diamond sword and the weight of his vulnerability on his lap as his life becomes a last-minute sacrifice for Grian to save himself. 

this last one is from “am I bothering you?”, which is part of the star wars au but boat boys centered:

“I can take this from here! Thank you so much for your help, Etho.” Joel waits for Etho to drop the tools into his waiting palm, and really, Etho should. He’s done more than he’s been asked already.

But he tightens his hold on the screwdriver, kneeling down next to the other damaged control system. 

“You can head to sleep now, if you’d like,” Etho tries, but as soon as the words leave his mouth, he knows Joel won’t listen. “I’ve got this.”

“I’m seeing this through to the end.” He sits down next to him, his presence strangely welcomed. 

they’re a bit awkward but the small actions like etho not giving up his screwdriver and joel sitting down when he could very well go to bed makes this one of my favorites as well

i had fun w this! man, going back to read old fics is so nice. thanks for the ask! :D

#so much etho in this one #ask #ask game #marius writes

[flyingfisharejustbirds]

part three of my etho stratos au except today we are looking at jimmy and what he’s been up to through the eyes of a very confused joel.

this is a mix of an actual written story and just headcannon so it’s not gonna be very good.

the first time it happened joel didn’t pay much attention to it. he was picking up hermes from sausage’s empire as he noticed jimmy had landed near by calling out for sausage. joel would’ve loved to toy with the sherif but him and etho had plans to teach hermes to use wings today so he bid sausage goodbye. as he left he saw sausage wrap and arm around jimmy’s waist kissing him. that’s fine sausage can be with whoever he wants even if it was that annoying sheriff.

the second time it happened joel had stoped by chromia for some dyes. he was searching for scott wanting to make a large order for some while he was here. what he did not want however was to see scott pin a very disheveled jimmy against the side of his house, making out with the very much out of breath sheriff. was jimmy with scott too? he decided that he’ll come back for that custom order some other time.

the third time it happened it was after the bloody sheriff had won his lawsuit against him and his toy shop. joel could only watch as fwhip practically launched himself at jimmy hugging his the best he could. the sheriff merely leaned down pressing his lips against the goblins. fwhips face lit up as he jumped excitingly muttering “oh my, oh my, the leaders given me a kiss! the sheriff gave me a kiss.” their attention was soon turned as the judge cleared their throat stating that there was another case to be solved. one about is the beloved sheriff was a toy or not. joel immediately snapped out of his downward spiral of thoughts and started taunting jimmy as the poor sheriff and his deputy ran off.

the fourth and hopefully final time it happened joel had been relaxing while etho constructed his newest redstone farm. his comm had pinged with the distinct sound of a newly whitelisted player joining the world.

*tangotek joined the game*

what? neither of them had heard news of anyone new joining soon. and why tango of all people he doesn’t seem like he would be suited to run an empire without risking it burning down. joel looked up at etho who was just as confused. as quick as the two could they headed over to spawn, only to watch as jimmy threw himself into tango arms. tango looked different; his hair was now a blue color almost looking frozen, his eyes were now blue but still just as warm, even his clothes changed he was now wearing a dark blue almost black cloak, with a royal style suit like thing under it. jimmy didn’t seem to care placing kisses all over the new players face as sausage, fwhip, and scott arrived quickly surrounding the two seemingly just as excited as jimmy about tango arrival. WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON?! just as he was about to head down and start demanding answers etho placed a hand on his arm shaking his head. “just let them be for a while we can just ask sausage when we pick up hermes again.” joel sighed before nodding following etho back to stratos.

wooo i’m done this is not beta read at all because i don’t want to. hope y’all had fun with this i’ll get back to boat boys next time i just thought this would be fun to write. any way bye bye!

#smallishbeans #empires joel #empires smp #scott smajor #jimmy solidarity #solidaritek #solidaritygaming #mythical sausage #goblin fwhip #fwhimmy #tangotek #the ranchers #empiresshipping #one of many brain rot