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#why is EEEEVERYONE trying to be her like
can we bring back the genre of gayness that makes you write songs like bohemian rhapsody instead of wannabe phoebe bridgers
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nintendont2502 · 2 years
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Kerakt - they/them
Prince of Space
Sstretches oout tthe bbegginning oof wwords. Ddoes iit eeeeeven mmore ffor ddramatic eeffect. Hhates eeeeveryone here X:] Ssounds llike aan aasshole mmost oof tthe ttime. Iis aan aasshole mmost oof tthe ttime. Ddoesn’t llike nnew ppeople.
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Ciripi - She/her
??? of Void
capitalises IMPORTANT WORDS . doesnt understand the concept of an INSIDE VOICE . will BITE people who tell her to shut up . is a little bit FERAL but thats okay she deserves it .
BONUS: two unfinished characters + arrtems classpect + way too many incorrect quotes under the cut because. i deserve it
Knaull (censored deadname by meta character), later ??? (he/him, later she/her)
Rustblood
???
<3< Scylan (later)
Tailiv - she/they
Purpleblood
???
Arrtem - Page of Breath (one who creates or provides freedom/independence/direction for others - relates to how he (eventually) helps calm Scylan down and make her stop doing. everything shes doing
II llove uunhinged wwomen bbut II aalso llove wwomen wwho ttry sso ffucking hhard tto bbe hhinged. Cclinging tto tthose hhinges bby hher ffingernails 
i will KILL for you . please let me KILL for you . 
Did KerAkt get elden ring?
no theyre SCARED of it
Why Are they scAred 0f it?
the MONSTERS
theyre called . th . theyre called RESPONSIBLITIES because they keep fucking RESPAWNING . 
Wwriggler sscreaming: AAAAAA
Mme: rreally ddont llike yyour vvibes rright nnow bbro
anxiety really crampss my sstyle like how am i going to sseem chill and fun if i often sstart trembling and breafing heafily and defeloping a look of impending doom in my eyess :<
Behold . i show you a small handful of PEBBLES . you are UNSURE of what im trying to get you to SEE . BEHOLD . i SHAKE the pebbles and start laughing TRIUMPHANTLY . it is still UNCLEAR what i think im doing 
I hAte m0dern Art but I Als0 hAte trAditi0nAl Art. Furry Art is the reAl mAster crAft And n0 0ne wAnts t0 Admit it. It tAkes A l0t 0f skill to Anthr0p0m0rphize every AnimAl p0ssible And Als0 Add c0ck And bAlls t0 it. 
Wwent tto tthe ffarmers mmarket yyesterday. Hhadn’t ggone oout iin oover aa yyear. 
Gguy sselling mmushrooms aasked hhow I wwas ddoing.
Ii ppanicked aand ddid aan aawkward llittle sshimmy ddance aat hhim. Hhe wwordlessly ddid iit bback.
Ccan’t sstop tthinking aabout tthis iinteraction.
im turning efil
H0w? Why?
i jusst am. sstay out of womenss bussinessss.
BITES you BITES you BITES you BITES you BITES you . 
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audreycritter · 4 years
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Have you seen the callout post for Lilo yet? Kaleidraws and their friend, called out a fictional six year old for not having the maturity level of an adult, her sole guardian, and eeeeveryone who liked the movie. The lack of empathy is frightening.
I went and read the posts you mentioned and mostly I want to tell you to stop quaranfishing for drama. This isn't even my fandom, bro. You wouldn't even put your name on it? And you want me to, by answering?
Alright, this is what I'll sign my name to:
1. Don't accuse people of lack of empathy because their opinion about media or fiction doesn't match yours.
You can callout fictional characters! You can do it for: petty, valid, personal, humorous, venting, serious, thoughtful, bored, passionate, etc reasons. And that's just fandom life. If people do that to characters in a way you don't like, then you hit that backspace, make your own blacklist filter, look the other way. What you don't do is go around trying to suck others into that in a public space. If something bothers you, find a friend to vent to! If you had messaged me to talk about why your opinions don't match and wanting to talk through it, I would have been perfectly happy to talk about why mine is different. We could have had a discussion, privately, about our engagement with media and what it meant to us without trying to mess up anyone else's day.
It's your job to keep your fandom experience safe and fun for you. It's your job to not be a jerk and try to intentionally make it unpleasant for others who don't share your opinions on fictional things.
(If you genuinely were curious about my opinion about this, or any other media, message or ask and don't name names! Just tell me what's bothering you or what you're curious about without making it about anyone else.)
Otherwise? Don't be an askhole.
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Skull theory #186
Reasons why Skull could 100% be Celty & Shinra (from durarara)’s kid who traveled back in time:
(usually do skull is secretly blah blah blah but I think being the kid of these two makes more sense then him being one of them)
he rides a motorcycle
is seemingly immortal
has some of Shinra’s... eccentric personality
doesn’t want anything to do with the underworld which could be for 2 reasons:
he doesn’t want his parents to find out that he’s in the past (and break the time-space continuum or whatever)
 he took a look at eeeeveryone in his entire life. and realized that the literally only sane person was his mother, so he decided to go with the closest thing to her job when he got dragged into the mafia
it would just be a really cool setup? like can you imagine him having to explain that, no the reason why he is trying to stay as legal as possible is less because of his various role models while growing up, and more in reaction to them. (and no, I don’t actually know if Celty can even have kids but I just really like this idea???)
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little-birdseeker · 5 years
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The Sisters
A fresh breeze of the sea blew over the market of Kugane and through Ianas long, brown hair, while she was strolling over it. Everything was so strange, so new, so different from Limsa. It was exciting! She was the first of her family, the Birdseekers, to see this beautiful city, and she wanted to see all of it, so she could tell them everything she experienced in her letters!
She followed the people, looked around the stands and let her nose guide her to the most delicious smelling food she had ever seen, when a certain person caught her attention. This red… this ears… and the tail! Could it be? “Isa?!”, she shouted, running to the mysterious little lady, who looked around baffled after hearing a very familiar voice.
“Iaaaana!!”, Isabelle screamed in excitement, when saw her sister running towards her. Before Iana could react, Isabelle had put her arms around her and gave her a big hug. “Isa, what are YOU doing here?” Didn’t dad tell her she was the first to visit Kugane? How did her little clumsy sister end up here? “Hmm… i was looooking for some nice cloooth! For new dreeesses, you see?”, Isabelle answered with her high voice Iana certainly hadn’t missed. And she was showing her cute, dumb smile again. “That’s not what i- ah, forget it. Let’s search for a quiter place, okay? Can’t hear much here…” - “Ohhh, i knooow where to go! Fooollow me!”
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After Isabelle had pulled Iana over half of the market, they finally sat on a little bench. While being pulled, Iana had enough time to take a closer look at her little sister. She hadn’t changed much, but still… “Tell me, Isa…”, she began while inspecting the red lady besides her. “Where did you get that dress? It looks really nice and well made, although i could do better, you know?” - “Oh, thiiis? Made it aaall by myself, in Uuul’dah!”, Isabelle answered proudly, happy about the praise she got. “You made this? You, who always ruined the fine cloth dad gave you?”, Iana laughed, which made Isabelle look slightly offended. “Reeeally, i-” - “Yeah, yeah, you made this, i go it”, Iana interrupted her sister, petting her head. She really hasn’t changed. Still trying to impress her big sister, and still getting offended if she didn’t believe her. It was still her dumb little sister. But still, where did she get that dress? She couldn’t made it herself, did she…?
For a few seconds, Isabelle gave Iana a grumpy look while being petted, until she shoved away the arm of her big sister. “It’s sooo nice to see you again, Iaaana! How iiis everyone at home? Are mooom and daaad okay? And what are yooou doing here?” So many words. So many questions. Iana sighed softly, before she answered. “When i left, everything was okay. Some were still worried about you, especially mom, you know? The usual. Ruun has left a while ago, too, but he should be okay. At least that’s what his letters tell. He writes one every moon. And i… i was hired from a company, here in Kugane. I arrived a few days ago, and well, now i’m going to work here as the first Birdseeker in Kugane. At least that’s what dad told me. But Isa, since when are you here in Kugane? And what in Azeymas name are you doing here?”
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“Oh, ehhh… i caaame here a feeew moons ago, i think? I could ask Vaaalli again, she will deeefinitly know when whe caaame here! She is the leeeader of the free cooompany i live with, and they moooved here, so… i came with them!” Iana looked absolutly baffled. What exactly did her little sister tell her right now? A few moons ago? A free company? And… that ring at her hand she was waving in front of her!? “So, Isa, you are telling me, you are part of a free company now, you are living here for a few moons in Kugane and you got married?”, Iana asked, pointing at the ring. “Mhm!”, Isabelle nodded proudly. “Then why didn’t mom and dad tell me about it?” - “Eeehhh… i, eh, kinda didn’t tell them?”, Isabelle responded and showed her dumb smile again, while looking a bit embarrassed, too.
Iana couldn’t believe it. Her little sister, the clumsy little bringer of chaos, had found a man, and didn’t tell her family about it? To be fair, she had been somewhat popular in Limsa, maybe because of her cuteness, her red hair and also her considerable bust. But still… who wanted to have such an annoying girl around all the time? And how did she managed to get married before her, her big, beautiful sister, who may have managed to get some boyfriends back home, but… they all had been idiots. And besides that… a free company?
“Okay, okay. You are married, i get that. But… a free company? One of those companies full of adventures?” Again, Isabelle nodded. “My huuusband brought me to them! They were sooo nice to me, and are aaall my friends! There is Vaaalli, our little leeeader, and Saaang, her huuusband, who teachs me, aaaand Niiiyu, my best frieeend, and Azuuura, the mom of eeeeveryone, and -”, Isabelle counted on her fingers while her green eyes seemed to glimmer with joy, when Iana interrupted her. “Isa, Isa, okay, i got it, i got it! There are many wonderful people. But what are you doing there? Adventuring as their little mage or what?”, she giggled. “Mhm! Aaand weaving!”, Isabelle answered as proud as she could.
“...what?” Iana hadn’t expected to be right. “You… what? Magic? Isa, nobody in our family could use magic, and you know that! You can’t fool me!”, she mocked her. “But i caaan use magic! Looook!” Isabelle stretched out her arm and… somehow, little sparkles appeared around it. “Oh, please. You are really desperate to impress me, aren’t you? We all know you just need a bit of magic powder to create something like that”, she giggled again. As if her sister could use magic. No Birdseeker had ever the power to use magic - even teleporting was something only a few could use. But magic? Never!
“Hmpf! Then taaaake that!”, Iana could hear Isablles huffy voice, when a surge of water hit her face, producing a loud splash. “Ehhh, wha- That was toooo much, i’m sooorry, Iana, soooorry!” Her whole face was wet, and her clothes, too. Big drops of water were dripping down from her face, taking her wonderful makeup with it. But Iana didn’t moved. She was too perplex from what had happened. Were did that water come from? Isabelle couldn’t carry that much water with her, could she? Iana would have noticed for sure! And nobody else was here! That meant…
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Magic! Iana looked at Isabelle in disbelieve. Why, of all people, was she the one who could use magic? And not her, the big sister? Why had it to be her clumsy, idiotic sister? Iana would be such a good mage, she knew it! And, besides that: if Isabelle could use magic, she could teleport, too! Which meant she could just… teleport back home, instead of taking a ship, which took at least a week to sail back to Limsa. While Isabelle could always go back home, Iana was stuck here!
Envious rage was building inside her, until she shouted “You are so proud of yourself, aren’t you? Just look at yourself! Look at you, look at me! You, with your red hair! Have you ever seen someone like yourself? A real Birdseeker has brown her! Like me, or dad! A real Birdseeker can’t use magic! A real Birdseeker is a masterful weaver, like dad and the others! A real Birdseeker is married to another Seeker of the sun, unlike you, i bet! I don’t know how you did end up i our family! But you are no real Birdseeker! You don’t deserve those stars at your cheek! You are a disgrace to the family! You, and your husband, your so called weaving-skills, your magic, your shitty red hair, and… and your ridiculous boobs!”
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Tears had build up in Isabelles eyes as Iana was yelling at her, running down her cheeks slowly, running over the red stars on her right cheek. And when Iana has stopped, Isabelle was shaking. For a second, she was looking at Ianas green eyes, she and Isa had inherit from her mother, before Isabelle turned and ran away. Away from her awful big sister. Iana didn’t followed her. Why should she? That girl wasn’t worth it. Instead, she should write a letter home. A very important letter.
When Isabelle appeared in front of the free companies house, she ran straight to the door. She didn’t care if anyone was there, she just wanted to be alone. She ran through the house, crying, until she reached her own room. She slammed the door after entering her room and jumped straight into her bed, where she burried herself in the blanket and all the cushions she had hoared. What did she do wrong this time? Everything? Could she ever be a true Birdseeker? One, her father and sister and everyone else would be proud of? She didn’t know. She just… didn’t know. So she kept crying. Crying, until there were no tears left...
((If you want to know, how the story continues, click here!))
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simkjrs · 6 years
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the making of enoshima junko
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junko is a fascinatingly funny villain who defies so many attempts to understand her, reason with her, or empathize with her. i think the creator of danganronpa even said she was made to be a villain who’s impossible to relate to or understand. BUT HERE I AM, writing a meta about the inner workings of her mind and her motivations as a villain and how much of a tragedy she really was, because i am out here empathizing with her and loving her with all my heart.
i think she can be difficult to understand, and it’s easy to give up and explain away her actions as just “an obsession with despair” but there’s so much more going on that i just can’t leave it at that. 
SO HERE WE GO: what the fuck is going on in junko’s mind?
[contains MAJOR spoilers for the first and second games and danganronpa 0; includes content from unlocked bonus mode games]
to start things off: if you said that junko's motivation for destroying the world was just because she wanted to and for no deeper reason, you'd be correct. but like, you wouldn’t be right.
critical to understanding junko is danganronpa 0. we learn a few things about junko, the first and most important of which is the fact that her TRUE shsl talent isn’t fashion, or despair -- but analysis. 
junko has a mind that works very, very well. scarily so. she has a brain that:
after watching someone fight for approximately three minutes, can near-flawlessly predict their moves and lay an elaborate trap to knock them out despite the fact that they are much faster and stronger than junko
in fact, she predicts them SO WELL that she doesn’t even have to LOOK at them in order to dodge their attacks while they’re chasing her
just... three minutes, and she completely saw through their fighting style. that’s unreal. 
can analyze others’ speech patterns, thoughts, & mannerisms, to the extent that she can nearly word-for-word guess what someone is thinking or going to say. so we get gems like this: 
“If my prediction is correct, he‘s going to realize very soon that the source of my newfound power lies in my notebook.      [...]     Madarai reached a conclusion. There was some kind of secret hiding in that notebook.” 
“Does [Junko] think this is a game?!     ‘You‘re probably asking yourself if I think this is a game, but I‘m not gonna tell you either way...’”
can generate countless connections and possibilities at a moment’s notice: (from the bonus “ultimate talent development plan” mode)
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can anticipate the way everyone is going to react to certain situations, as if they aren’t all complex independent organisms but instead actors whose lines she’s reading off a script... 
junko has a mind that accumulates data about the world very, very rapidly, and makes this.... GIANT database of behaviors, and patterns, and predictions. she's smart. she can lay a plot that accurately predicts the actions of people MONTHS in advance, to the point that she can make her plots run almost entirely on the reactions she predicted other people would have; she can craft a plan that would run completely in absentia of her, powered only by the decisions she predicted others would make. 
that's what she does in dangan ronpa 0. and it goes down without a hitch: 
“Just answer me!” Frustrated, Matsuda raised his voice angrily. “What is it you want to achieve? Just what is it you‘re trying to do?”
Enoshima tilted her head slightly to the side.
“Nothing really. I don‘t want to do anything.”
“... What?”
“It‘s too late, I shan‘t do a thing. I‘m not going to do a single thing, I have everyone else doing it for me. Guys like the student council, the headmaster or the steering committee... and also that girl who you absolutely adore... EEEEVERYONE is running around, doing my work.”
so what you learn from this is that junko is frighteningly good at breaking down the behavioral patterns of the world & people around her. good enough to predict other people, down to their thoughts, speech, and decision making process... good enough to predict fashion trends and make a name for herself as the ultimate fashionista... good enough that, with a little bit of time and observation, she can read her environment like it’s an open book. 
good enough that she’s completely, utterly bored. 
bored of talking to people because their responses are SO predictable, bored of schoolwork because it's SO easy, bored of doing things because it's just the same patterns repeated over and over and over again. junko can predict people months in advance; reading people in the moment must be a joke. 
for example, during her events in the bonus “ultimate talent development” game mode, junko has an encounter with asahina aoi and hanamura teruteru, in which hanamura invites asahina to his kitchen and junko cheerfully inserts herself into the conversation. there’s a little banter that junko takes part in at first, but then, before hanamura can get around to telling asahina what he invited her to the kitchen for--
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turns out hanamura wanted asahina to taste-test some of his donuts. before he’d even mentioned it, junko figured it out. and to her, it was completely trivial to figure out. 
this is what daily life is like for her: nothing new, nothing exciting, just an endless parade of people moving according to a script. a script that junko read, divined, memorized, learned by heart, and is now completely and utterly bored of. 
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life for junko is the perpetual, endless torture of boredom. it is about as engaging as being locked in an empty room with nothing to do but watch a clock ticking away at the time. 
and if you had no way to leave that room, no way to escape -- eventually you’d have nothing to do except take apart the clock itself, wouldn’t you? how long could you hold out before -- out of sheer frustration and the need to do something -- you’d try to dismantle the clock piece by piece? 
what junko wants, more than anything else, is relief from the numbness of boredom. she wants stimulation! interest! something exciting, something that can stir her to passions she could never reach under the endless cafard that weighs her down so in daily life! the highs of hope and joy, the lows of utter devastation and despair... how could she not chase that? she so desperately  wants it! she wants that excitement! she wants, more than anything else, to feel.
and boy howdy does despair make her feel. taking, for example, this passage from when junko personally murders her beloved matsuda yasuke (dangan ronpa 0): 
[Junko] loved him so much, that irreplaceable existence, more important than anyone else, almost obsessed with him to the point of insanity, always wanting to be within his embrace, even living in a world with only him would be fine. And by losing that incredible existence, just how much despair would [she] fall in?
She nurtured her love for Matsuda all this time just to get a taste of that feeling. Seeing her loved one be smothered by despair during his last moments, she pretty much lived to experience that spectacle.
Finally getting to taste that despair... 
“...INCREDIBLE!!”
It was more than anything she could have hoped for.
"Too depressing! Too good! My chest is gonna tear open! This is true self-loathing! I want to die! This is! This is the despair that comes from losing a loved one!”
While Enoshima‘s being was assaulted by that despair, she kicked Yasuke Matsuda‘s corpse with all her strength.
“Amazing, amazing! Amazingamazingamazingamazingamazing!”
and again: 
Looking at this notebook brought back memories of Yasuke Matsuda. Remembering him, she could feel her chest tightening. Consumed by disgust at what she did to him, she was compelled to cry and scream out. I want to forget this already! I want to just get rid of this notebook!
“Aha! All the more reason to keep this on hand!”
despair is just about the only thing that can reliably make junko feel something -- anything other than the utter boredom that plagues her so, that dogs her footsteps wherever she goes and eats away at her mind. it’s the only thing that can bring her relief. it’s her drug, her nepenthe, her poison of choice 
and for this reason alone, despair is the only thing that junko can cling to. as long as she’s bored, as long as she’s trapped by the very nature of her own mind, the only thing she can do is chase the purity of despair. 
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in fact, it would be accurate to say that despair is junko’s only hope for being satisfied with her existence, and her only hope to be happy. Or, as dangan ronpa 0 puts it, “Junko Enoshima wishes for despair above anything else [...] finds hope within despair more than anyone else.” 
with this context, we can finally understand what ikusaba mukuro tried to say about her sister (again, in dangan ronpa 0): 
“[Junko] has lived her whole life with despair by her side. She lived while immersed in despair. That‘s why she began looking for despair in others. She learned to enjoy pushing people into despair [...] she learned to enjoy inflicting despair onto herself. That‘s how the link to despair began. As she chased down despair, she pushed it onto others on the way. Doing so, it caused her to desire falling into despair even more...and because of that chain to despair, the Super High School Level Despair was born.”
junko has been, and i quote, “bored since the day [she] was born.” despair is the only thing she has. by causing others to fall into despair, she can experience it herself. the more she cares about her victims, the better, too -- the worse she’ll feel, and therefore, the better she’ll feel. this is why junko gives so much special attention to causing the despair of those she loves the most, i.e. her childhood love matsuda yasuke, her sister mukuro, and her classmates at hope’s peak. 
BUT! there’s also an added bonus to all her convoluted plans for despair. it involves setting up situations that she’s never before seen -- and therefore, situations she can’t entirely predict! her pursuit of despair is her ticket to possibility of an unpredictable factor in her life -- and for someone as endlessly bored as junko? that’s as good as it gets. something exciting! something new! 
and if she doesn't know what's going to happen, then junko gets to feel things like ANTICIPATION, or SURPRISE, or FEAR, or DELIGHT -- things that are so often denied to her in her daily life because she can predict so much that she's just bored all the time!!! everything is boring!!! an endless plain of dull, boring nothingness with nothing to engage her for more than a minute, and junko HATES it, junko would do anything to find something even a little interesting or surprising in this world! she’d murder, she’d weaponize her empathy against herself, she’d destroy the world! she'd do anything to feel something besides boredom again!!!!
for junko, "despair" is associated with excitement and relief. she would pursue it to such a degree that she'd destroy the entire world and herself while she's at it -- just so she can feel something besides the endless boredom and nothingness that has burdened her all her life. 
of course, that means there’s a little dissonance in what junko claims to stand for. for junko, true despair would probably be akin to being locked in that empty room with the clock, and never letting herself take the clock apart. it would be... giving into boredom. and that’s something she could never bear to do. 
so then we have lines like this: 
With the sullen expression still on her face, Enoshima trotted towards Madarai‘s dead body. “It‘s your fault, y‘know. Take that!” She started jabbing her toes into the body. “Hey, say something! What‘s up with being so easy to kill?! You should‘ve at least made an effort to disrupt my plans! How can I possibly despair like that?!”
despair is about the thrill! the excitement! and yes, junko is making all these plans, hoping that they’ll succeed -- but how can junko despair if there isn’t at least the excitement of defeating all those who would desire to challenge her?! if there isn’t at least something a LITTLE new, a LITTLE bit unexpected?! she can’t, thats what! at least let your despair drive you to do something interesting and new for once in your life! 
or this: 
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in all probability, junko -- more than anything -- would love an enemy who she can’t defeat. someone who, no matter how much she tries, she simply can’t overcome! because more than anything, that would represent a challenge -- and therefore, something exciting. junko’s happy ending is meeting her match, and more. 
too bad she doesn’t have anyone like that. 
so instead, junko has nothing to test her mind against, nothing to occupy her... nothing to save her from the boredom eating her alive. and so, from dangan ronpa 0: 
Everything turned out just the way she expected... Everything turned out just the way she hoped... and so she despaired.
“But, it‘s so unsatisfying when your plans always succeed... Whose fault is this? Is anyone going to take responsibility?”
and again, from the last trial of the first game: 
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in the end, despair is only a poor substitute for what junko really wants; a pale, cheap imitation. what junko wants the most -- excitement, purpose, relief from boredom -- will forever be out of reach, as long as she’s trapped by the confines of her own mind. 
i think the saddest part about danganronpa 0 is that we get a look at what it would take for junko to be really, truly happy. junko wipes her own memory; more than that, she makes it so her long term memory is nonexistent, and she forgets things almost as soon as they happen. and the kicker is that junko is happier like this, living as the forgetful otonashi ryouko, than she was as herself. 
because she constantly forgets everything, she’s not bored. everything is a new experience. she’s happy to be with matsuda and feels no need to chase despair. as ryouko, junko is still self centered and somewhat callous, but she’s also passionate, excitable, cheerful, upbeat. she cares about those who are important to her, and would try her best to preserve their happiness. 
but when her brain is in perfect working condition, she can only helplessly fall back into the hopeless boredom that she hates so much -- and that she’d do anything to escape. 
it is a boredom so complete, she can’t stand it. she can’t even stand herself. her own predictable self, whose mind, thoughts, actions she knows so well... in danganronpa 3, junko actually has something of a seemingly stable personality, but by the time the end of the first danganronpa game rolls around... 
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... she’s so bored of even herself that she feels the need to constantly switch up her personality. 
the sad thing this implies is that junko’s mind just -- couldn’t take it, anymore. it gave out under its own weight. her boredom was so absolute, her mental state could only deteriorate. she could only become increasingly unstable, and increasingly desperate to find something, anything, to keep her boredom at bay. 
no wonder junko has this sentiment, then: 
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junko’s analytical mind is her greatest blessing, but also her greatest downfall; the source of her boredom, and thus, her descent into despair. she went to all these efforts to relieve herself of her boredom; and to do that, she chased despair, defined herself by the concept, even. but in the end, what junko needed the most was an escape from being herself. 
for someone like that... no wonder she welcomed death with open arms. here it is: the end of the line. no more boredom -- no more anything, in fact. only the fear, the terror, the excitement of her execution -- the great unknown -- and then, her death. 
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the tragedy is that for junko, this was the only happy ending she could have. as long as she was alive, she’d never be happy, never be satisfied. death, for her... was a relief. 
so when naegi started to tell her that executing herself wasn’t necessary--
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she became angry. this was all the wanted in life, this was all she could ever hope for. this was, in her eyes, the only way for things to end. 
this is the tragedy of junko enoshima: a girl who, in a desperate effort to keep herself from going insane, destroyed everything she touched. 
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C:R ~VE~ Chapter 17
Aouda is holding my hair back as I splash warm water on my face from the basin.
We’ve spent the afternoon talking together about everything, from my experience at the university to her literally being swept off her feet by Fogg.
“Our first adventure was, quite literally, a trip around the world,” she says. “She had made a wager with her fellow members of the Reform Club to travel around the world in eighty days... without the use of an airship.”
“Eighty days... I wager that didn’t give too much time for sightseeing,” I say before patting my face dry with a towel. My eyes are still a little red, but I look much better than I did before.
This innocent observation surprisingly makes Aouda blush, then she looks at me with a smile. “Philomena told me that I was the only thing she took the time to see on that trip. I was the only thing that she allowed to distract her. It sounds so simple, but if you know her--”
I nod. Fogg is, to put it bluntly, a walking clock.
Aouda brushes out my hair and sighs. “There, are you feeling better now?”
I nod again.
“So... what do you think will make you happy now?”
“I want to be with Nemo and Barbicane and the others. Even if I’m just sitting and reading, I want to feel their energy.”
I’m surprised to hear laughter bubble out of my mouth. “Observing is my job, after all! It’s what I do best!”
Aouda shakes her head. “Honestly, being around such large egos might do you some good. I had better prepare to make my return to Steel London, though. I assume that you will be there to see us off, won’t you?”
“Of course,” I say.
I walk over to the door to open it for her, but both of us jump when we hear something slam on the door.
“Owww.... ow ow ow owww...”
.....
Aouda and I look at each other.
“Huhhh? Why is the door locked...”
“Aouda, I do have a question for you,” I ask. “Has your cousin always been....”
I clear my throat, unsure of how to finish that sentence.
Aouda laughs sympathetically. “Not as blatantly, perhaps, but yes. He’s always been ‘eccentric’, to put it mildly.”
“Hmmm~? Aoooouda, have you been keeping the Professor all to yourself~? I’ve been waaaiiiting all afternoon!”
I quickly open the door for Nemo, who’s still rubbing his nose, a pitiful frown on his face.
Aouda shrugs and crosses her arms. “I told her about the engine, but I’m afraid we got wrapped up in our discussion. Sometimes, women just need to talk about things alone. Geez...” Aouda looks down at the doorknob and shakes her head. “I thought you would’ve learned to knock by now...”
Aouda moves past her cousin and begins walking away. “I’ll see you before we set off. Don’t keep us waiting, okay Da-- Nemo?”
“Mm-hmm~ ciao ciao, my cousin~” Nemo waves over his shoulder before looking back at me-- at my eyes, specifically.
Shit, they must still be red...
“The engine will still be there,” he says before closing the door behind him and walking towards me. When he’s about to step into me, I stumble back and trip into my vanity.
“Ahh-- hold still,” he says. He leans over me and tilts my chin up.
I wonder if he can hear my heartbeat. Certainly he can feel my skin heating up.
“Where did I puuuut thaaaat....”
Nemo roots around in his coat before pulling out a vial with a triumphant (and loud) ‘a-ha!’ He quickly takes off his gloves and sighs before quickly undoing the bandages on his fingertips.
“Ho~nest~ly~ Polly-chaaaan, you’re so much trouble... close your eyes.”
My eyes widen, and he just looks at me until I obey him.
My lips are aching, and I wish that it was those that he had touched! But instead I feel a cool sensation on one cheek, then the other.
....?
Is this lotion?
“Crying dries out your skin,” I hear Nemo say. The lotion grows warm with his touch as he gently rubs it into my cheeks. “There~ we~ gooo~ feel better?”
I open my eyes and put my fingertips to my cheeks. They do feel soft.
“Hehehe! It’s my own formula~! I am a chemist too, you knoooow!” 
“You... you make your own beauty products?” I really shouldn’t be surprised, but the eager smile that stretches out over his face makes it worth it.
“Mmm-hmm! ❤ Lotion, serums, and l-i-p-s-t-i-c-k-! Sweat-proof, water-proof, feather-proof, and ki~ss~proof!”
Kiss-proof, huh...
I feel my face heat up under my fingers, and I quickly put my hands to my sides.
“Of course, leaving a mark on a lover can be fun, but sometimes you just want your makeup to stay in place. Besiiiiides~” his teeth glint. “There are other ways to leave marks~”
Oh.
OH.
“L-Let’s be serious, Nemo...” I stutter, laughing nervously. “Ah, th-the engine, right? You were having problems because-- because fire consumed oxygen, which is--isn’t ideal for being under the water, s-so...”
Nemo leans over me again, putting his hands on the vanity behind me, effectively pinning me to it.
“S-So instead of using fire to boil water and create steam, chemical reactions would be used, a-and... it would be a... a chemical furnace and...”
He lowers his head, and soon I can feel his lips gently press against my neck. I can feel them against my pulse, quickening under his touch. They’re so soft and warm. Is this our first kiss? Does this count as a kiss?
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Chemical... steam made by chemicals... oxygen not being consumed as a result... I... I could really use some oxygen, too....
“Well, how about it~?” I feel his breath hot on my skin when he opens his mouth. Then, there’s a light pressure as he grazes my skin with his teeth.
My voice, once occupied with technology, lets out a sigh that sounds so needy that I shudder in shame.
“Shall I show eeeeveryone that you’re miiiiiine~?”
I swallow, feeling the sensation of my throat move against his mouth.
I feel light-headed as I respond: “Y-Yes...”
He smiles, and I feel him open his mouth again “Ahhh~n~”
And then...
He blows a raspberry into my neck, making me jump.
“HAAAAAAAAA---- hahahahaaa!” He stands up and leans back, cackling loudly and pointing at me. “You should see the looooooooook on your faaaaaaaaaaace!!”
He was teasing me. That’s all it had been... teasing.
Maybe it was out of embarrassment, but after a moment of mortifying silence I begin to laugh, too. The situation had been so serious only a moment ago, and now here we are laughing like fools.
He takes my hand and leads me out of the bedroom, not even giving me time to pin my hair back up.
“You’re right, though,” Nemo explains as we walk towards the warehouse. “Impey Barbicane and I have finished constructing an engine that actually creates oxygen as a byproduct! With this, we won’t have to surface nearly as much! We took the concept that Narcís Monturiol designed and adjusted it so...”
Nemo is leading the way as he excitedly talks about the history of submersibles. Though his speech is still flamboyant, the langue that he’s using is easy for me to understand, so I’m able to get excited alongside him. 
I put my free hand to my neck where he had kissed me. It still feels warm.
When we make it to the warehouse, Nemo pulls out one of his arm bandages and orders for me to close my eyes again.
“Are you going to...?”
“Mn~?” Nemo tilts his head.
“N-Nevermind,” I quickly mutter.
Nemo sticks his tongue out impishly as he begins to cover my eyes.
“Okay, okay~ I’m going to be taking you inside the inner hull, so I’ll have to carry you.”
I nod silently before I feel him pick me up in his arms.
“I-- I’ve seen the blueprints before, so why are you being so secretive--?” I ask, yelping as I feel him kick open the warehouse door.
Of course, it’s for the drama of it all.
Still, I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t enjoying this.
“Uhh...” I hear Barbicane express his confusion. “N-Nemo... isn’t it a little soon to be carrying Polly-chan across the threshold like that...?”
Nemo’s laugh is so loud that I have to cover my ears.
“Impeeeey Barbicaaaaane! Haven’t you realized by this point that my bride is SCIIEEENNCEEE?!”
“Y-Yeah, you’re saying that, but still... um.... your arms are shaking, do you need help...?”
“IMPEYBARBICANEIAMFINETHANKYOU.”
I have no idea what he just said.
“IWOULDGIVEYOUAPEACESIGNBUTIAMCARRYINGPOLLY-CHANSO...”
“P... Peace... sign...?”
“YESLIKETHATTHANKYOU.”
All of a sudden I feel Nemo running. He must have overexerted himself by kicking down the door and carrying me at the same time. Or maybe it has something to do with what Barbicane said...
But that’s probably just wishful thinking.
With the voices of the others dwindling, it feels safe for me to lean my head against Nemo’s shoulder. Even with the smell of chemicals and metal, it’s easy for me to think back fondly to that night on the airship. 
Nemo sets me down and mutters something about opening up the hatch.
I realize with a shiver that I’m likely standing next to the very submarine that will take me on my adventure.
I reach out my hand and grope in the air, only to hear a shriek. “STAAAAAAY PUUUUUT!”
I immediately freeze.
“Geeeeez....” I hear the sound of heavy movement, and I realize it’s probably the hatch being opened. Then there’s a thump and I hear Nemo walk over to me.
“What were you trying to do?” he asks.
“It’s kind of embarrassing to say it...” I mumble.
“Ufufufu....” Nemo’s giggle is haughty and wicked. “Don’t forget that you’re blindfolded, Professor. I can make you as embaaaaaaarrassed as I want~”
I may be blindfolded, but I hope that Nemo can see the glare that I’m giving him. It’s really not fair how easily he can tease me, but I guess it’s my own fault.
“So~?” he continues, and I can practically see his leer. “What were you trying to accomplish by grabbing around at a highly dangerous piece of machinery?”
I look away, hoping the bandages are hiding my blush. “I want... to touch it...”
“... Eh?”
“T-The submarine,” I quickly clarify. “Since I can’t see it yet, I want to touch it. I want to touch my dream. I suppose it will feel more concrete to me, then. Like it’s really happening.”
I hear Nemo take a few steps away and thump against something metallic.
“Nemo?”
I hear a sniff.
“Polly-chan.... that... that’s so....”
The air is suddenly squeezed out of me as Nemo hugs me tightly.
“THAT’S SO CUUUUUUUUUUUUUTE!!”
“Urk! Nemo, I’m still blindfolded!!”
But he doesn’t let go, spinning me around and sweeping me back up in his arms. I couldn’t even protest as I felt him nuzzle his cheek against mine.
“A woman in love with sciiiiiience-- can anything be so preeeciiouuusss?!”
He carries me in the direction he had been working on and sets me down on the ground. Then, he takes my hand in his.
I hear him inhale and feel soft strands of his hair touch my fingertips. Then, the warmth of his lips on my knuckles, slowly kissing each one in turn.
My knees feel weak.
Then he quietly laughs and says: “I told you I could embarrass you, didn’t I? Hmm~ what fun is making a threat without sometimes acting on it~?”
I feel my body heating up again, like it had back in the bedroom. It’s really terrible how a simple kiss can make my senses so muddled.
“You keep on teasing me,” I murmur. “Is it that fun?”
“It iiiiiis~!” he draws me close to him again. “And I will keep on teasing you until I’m certain that my cute professor will never reject me~ I’ll intoxicate you with my very being, the most sinful of experiments.”
I feel his warm hand cup my cheek, and feel his breath on my ear. “And when I know you’re mine, that you’ll never reject me... I will do everything in my power to make you happy.”
Then, he puts my hand against something cold. With an excited shiver I realize that I’m touching the hull of the submarine. He puts his hand over top of mine and threads our fingers together.
“Your dream,” he says, laughter in his voice. He sounds so unbelievably happy. After meeting Aouda, hearing the truth about everything, after I realized how my own insecurities were affecting me... that loud laughter of his was a wonderful sound.
-----
When the blindfold drops from my eyes, I look around in shock. Though the hulls aren’t complete and there’s a gaping hole, I’m clearly inside the submarine.
This room doesn’t look anything like an engine room, though.
Nemo’s grinning at me as he sprawls out on a velvet chaise lounge.
“I hooooope you don’t mind that I told a little~ white~ lie~! Of course, I’ll show you the engine room, but...” he looks up at me with a lopsided smile. “I thought you might enjoy this more.”
Though the room is somewhat small, it’s nothing short of luxurious. A sofa sits in front of the circle cut into the metal, leaving me to believe that it will eventually house a gargantuan porthole for undersea viewing. The entirety of one of the walls has been converted into a metal bookshelf already lined with volumes on science of all kinds.
As I step around, my eyes focus on...
“Is... is that a...?”
“Hrm?” Nemo tilts his head back and looks upside-down at the wall behind him. “Oh, yes.” He points at what I’m staring at. “She’s in progress right now, but she’s eveeeeeentually going to be a pipe organ. Isn’t she looooovely~?”
“A... a pipe organ?!”
It’s huge, taking up the entirety of the wall in a beautiful patchwork of metal.
“I mean, I figured you were a piano player, but...”
Nemo tilts his head to look at me. “How did you figure that out?”
I... I hadn’t meant for him to hear that. Oh, dear.
“I... uh...” Well, there was no way I was going to get out of this one. I might as well just suck it up and hope he’s somewhat merciful in his teasing-- though judging from today’s events, I doubt it. “I... noticed...”
I rub the back of my neck and take a breath.
“I observe these sorts of things. When you work, you tend to hold your hands out in a way that pianists would.”
I stretch out my fingers to demonstrate.
“Though, I shouldn’t be surprised that your instrument of choice is the pipe organ. The multiple ranks and manuals would provide more mental stimulation for someone like you compared to a singular keyboard.”
I inwardly curse at myself for going on like that.
Nemo looks surprised, but then his lips stretch out into another one of his grins.
“My, my.... how obseeeervant! It’s no wonder you excel in your field!” He swings his legs over the edge of the chaise lounge and props himself up. “I suppose your observant mind is ooooone of the reasons why I’m falling in love with you, Professor Aronnax.”
I can do nothing more than stare at him.
“Oh~ don’t look so surprised!” he waves a hand idly. “I told you already that I’m ex~pe~ri~men~ting~ on you. What fun would it be if my heart weren’t also in this test?”
He giggles as he tilts his head and looks out the hole in the wall. “Ahh, and speaking of love~”
I follow his gaze and see Barbicane and Cardia walking next to each other on the ground level.
“He’s been very entertaining,” Nemo continues. “Almost as entertaining as the submarine itself... honestly, having Cardia-chan be our assistant was a moment of geeeenius!”
Barbicane has an expression of embarrassment on his face. Seeing him look hesitant is a little strange.
“He’s inexperienced...” Nemo continues with his musings. “I’m not sure he even reeeeaalizes himself what he’s feeling! It’s cute...”
I clasp my hand over my mouth when I see Cardia reach up to touch Barbicane’s cheek. Barbicane looks just as shocked as I imagine I do.
Nemo just continues giggling. “First love~ there’s nothing quite like it.”
I hear him stand up and walk behind me. He quietly peers over my shoulder down at Barbicane and Cardia.
“She’s going back to London with her brother,” I say. “I wonder if they’re saying goodbye...”
I shake my head.
“We shouldn’t be watching this, Nemo.”
Nemo sighs and turns away. “I suppooooose we should be making our way to the airship.”
I swallow. “Do you really think they’ll manage to convince Queen Victoria? Or stop Aleister?”
I hear Nemo stop at the doorway.
“Don’t ask me questions like that, Polly-chaaaaan.... I may not look like it, but I really am quite a pessimist.”
I close my eyes. Right now, unfortunately, I feel that his pessimism might be right.
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roccoroks · 6 years
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Dag 3 THE DAG FILES! *que X Files music* The following events took place at the Spring Grand Rod Run, names have been changed to protect the stupid and liable. time:.......dark....ish im working a double, 2nd & 3rd shift pryor to the take over of the motel there for i was still a employee at the time and had to answer the a boss (the sorry motherfucker that he is) but thats another story/rant. its hot outside, people are pissing and shitting all over my lobby bathrooms and im trying to deal with 100+ geusts and god only knows how many classic cars... this is more of what its like to deal with multipul shitty guests and problems while working a rod run in pigeon forge tn. the grand rod run takes place twice a year and has more that 1000-2500 show cars through out the city of pigeon forge. we find our hero sitting on his ass watching youtube videos and eating potato chips and trying to download bootleged My Little Pony:Friendship Is Magic episodes when the internet suddenly explodes and stops working due to me trying to download 30 episodes at once! this is more of what its like to deal with multipul shitty guests and problems while working a rod run in pigeon forge tn me: *prior to net crash* ^.^ *om nom nom nom* *internet crashes* me: O.O........shit....not good me: hey chris (we work in pairs on rod runs) chirs: whats up man me:.....um i think were fucked chris:what did you break? me: the internet....all of it chris: I FUCKING TOLD YOU NOT TO DOWNLOAD THAT MUCH PONY SHIT AT ONCE! me:.....sorry?...you fix?...please chris: *sigh* leave, NOW! me: *me runs out from behind the counter just as the phone rings* ~when the wifi goes down at the motel, you might as well have set the place on fire, eeeeveryone calls to tell you!~ me: front desk poc 1: (pissed of coustomer) yeah uh hi, the inter net is not working, how do i log on? me: (i know its not working, i broke it! ^.^) im sorry we are having technical difficulties and are trying to restore it as we speak! poc1: oh ok ill try later! bye me: that wasnt so.... *ring* me: front de..... rpoc: (realy pissed of coustomer) HEY THE INTRANETS NOT WORKING me: im sorry we ar....(did you just say "INTRANET"?) rpoc: WHEN I MADE MY RESERVATION I WAS TOLD THERE WAS WEEFI AND I DONT HAVE WEEFI WHAT DO YOU PLAN TO DO ABOUT THAT! me: sir im trying to get it back on line and i should have it working with in.....( WAIT...WTF IS WEEFI?) rpoc: I DONT WANT EXCUSES I WANT THE INTRANET FIXED me: sir? sir are you there? rpoc: *yells louder* I SAID IIIIII WWWWWWWWAAAANT TTTTHEEEEEEEE INTERNET FIIIIIXXXXXXEEDD NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOWWWWWWW CAN YO.... me: SIR YOUR GOING TO HAVE TO SPEAK UP BECAUSE I CANT HEEEEEEEEEEAAAARRRRRRRRR YYYYYYOUUUU! (fucking yell at me dick head) rpoc: *SOME HOW YELLS EVEN LOUDERER* III SAID FIX THE GOD DAMED INTRA......... me: idk chris i cant hear the guy, he sounds like a broken record. (lmao i soooooo can hear the vein in your head thumpin!) rpoc: you have got to be kidding me, now the fucking teller phone doesnt work *hangs up* chris: what was that all about? me: thats how you deal with a bad guest chris: great! now hes going to come down here and bitch to me me: yup, see ya later! me: *leaves to check parking lot for cars to tow,leaves chris to clean up mess* me: *looks out the window* (if there were any more cars in my parking lot it, this place would look like a poory orginized scrap yard) me: *walks outside for 3 hours* *3 hours, 2 beers and one smokey burn out from a dodge challenger later* *sitting at the desk, chris leaves for the night* chris: im turning my phone off, dont....fucking.....call...me! me:k me: (back to down loading ponies! and cruse CL for car parts) poc: AHEM! me: /).- (I will not respond to a clearing of the throat, what the fuck bitch, this aint high school) poc: AAAAHHEEEEMMM! ME: (NOPE! FUCK YOU) poc : EXCUSE ME! me: (was that so hard?....bitch) yes mam! may i help you? ^.^ poc: uuuhh you need to do something about that drunk guy in the pool.... me: drunk guy? poc: yes hes in the pool and hes drunk and i dont want to see that! me: ...*blank stare* poc: well.... me: (do i get any more info than that? ITS THE ROD RUN! EEEVVERRRRRYYYBODIES FUCKING DRUNK!) yes mam what does he look like? poc: HE IS THE DRUNK ONE! me: (com'on! take the hint!) mam this is the rod run and everyone in the pool is drunk, is he bothering you in anyway? poc: well..huh..he just shit in the pool.... me:........ me:....your shitting me....(i haha i made a funny) poc: she for your self! me: *goes to pool, see only 3 people in the pool, all of them drunk* me: soooo he just? poc: yup, he just dropped his swim suite and shit right in the pool, then he jumped it , then he told his friends that it was a candy bar and dared them to eat it! me: .......*speachless*.... me: ok mam, who dun shit in my pool *i sooooooo wish i was making this up* poc: him! *points at all 3 drunk people* me: (really? not the middle one, not the one on the right just that one?)ok witch one of them? poc: the fat one me: (THERE ALL FUCKING FAT!) ok witch fat one poc: I FUCKING GIVE UP! *STORMS OUT* me: (damn, she lasted longer than most, shee needs a discount!) me: *walks out into the pool* ok, who shit in my pool (this situation warents cussing) *all the drunk people* "HE DID" *AND POINTED AT EACH OTHER!* me: /).- WHERE IS IT! *again all three of them * THERE! *all three point in different directions!* me: soooo its everywhere.... *blank stares all around and akward silence* me: where....is..... the.... TUUUUUURRRRD *more blank stares* drunk guy 1: ummmmmm me: all of you, GET OUT! drunk guy 2: but what if we.... me: NOW! *all three exit pool* drunk guy: um when can we get back in the pool? me: tomorrow dunk guy 2: why so long? me: look im the only guy here and i have better things to do then go on a wild goose chase for a lone turd in the pool! drunk guy 1: well whos going to clean it up? me: NOT FUCKING ME! YOU WANA SWIM? GO NEXT DOOR AND LAY A LOG IN THEIR POOL! *they all think this is wildly funny and walk off to deuce one out in the smokey mountain lodge's pool* 30 mins and a few pissed off would be pool goers later ME:* just sat down to pizza* *ring, ring, ring,ring,ring* me: FOR FUCK SAKE! I HATE YOU PHONE *get up and walks to phone* me: *bangs knee on desk drawer* FUCKING OOOOOWWWWWWEEEEEEEEE ! FUCK YOU TOO BROKEN DESK DRAWER! AHEM! front deak *in sweet voice* dag: (room 403)" THE GAW DAMN INTRANET AINT FUCKIN WERKIN!"(i a heavy drunk southern accent) me: e.e...(you sound familar) its not? one second let me check. *puts customer on hold* me: *goes to bathroom to take a dump* 5 mins later me: (fuck ! hes still there!) *takes dag off hold* sir? dag: BOUT TIME! me: try it agian dag: I DONT FUCKIN KNOW HOW TO GET ON THE GAW DAMNEDED THING ME.......O.o (then how do you know its not working.....WAIT, HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU....DO YOU EVEN COMPUTER BRO?) me: sir? dag: *YELLS TO WIFE* HEY! GET THA FUCK OVER HERE AND MAKE THE FUCKER WORK ME:  .....(oh my god this is like jerry springer) *long pause* dags wife in background: THERE! IT FUCKING WORKING...WAIT NO, YES...NO ITS NOT ME:.......sir? DAG: HANG ON DAMNED IT! ME:......*SUCKING BACK LAUGHING.....BECAUSE I JUST FLIPED THE BREAKER TO THE ROUTER KILLIN ALLLLL THE INTERNETS* dag: IT JUST WAS FUCKIN WERKIN THEN THE SHIT BROKE ME: HANG ON A SEC.....*puts dag back on hold, sit down and eats a slice of pizza* 4 slices of pizza later... me: *flips breaker back on, takes dag off hold* sir, HOW BOUT NOW? dag: HAY, HE SAYS ITS WERKIN........WELL.....GET THA FUCK OVER HUR AND MAKE THE TING GO! ~pernounce it just like i wrote~ long pause...... dag: aigh the fuckers workin now ME: go deal yall, yall has a goooooooood nigh nowww...... dag: hangs up me: (THAT WAS FUN! now for foods!) *almost sits down* *ring, ring,ring,ring,ring* me: FUCKING REALLY?!? ahem: front desk? dag: HAY ME: (oh gawd not you again) yes sir dag: what room are we in me: O.o..(really.....you dont even know what room....) 403 sir dag: im in 403? me: yes sir dag: TELL THEM FUCKERS ABOVE ME TO SUCK THE FUCK UP OR IMA GONA BEAT 7 SHADE OF SHIT OUT OF THEM! ME: (i would pay soooooo much money, you dont even know) sir its 930pm and during the rod run thing tend to go on until 12 am or so, im sorry but there nothing i can do dag: I GONA KICK THEIR ASSES! ME: SIR! PLEASE DONT GO......*CLICK* ME: *RUNS OUT THE DOOR TO THE 5TH FLOOR* FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK! *arives at 5th floor.....its empty* me: ......(aint no one up here) *walks down to 4th floor, sees drunk guy outside 403, in whity tighties, passed out in the chairs* me: (im sooooo not dealing with that) *goes back to office* me: * sits down at the desk and see something out of the corner of my eye* *looks at security moitor* me: DAFUQ IS THAT? *switches to pool cam, see UFO (unidentified floating object)* me: nooooo, it cant be.... *zoooms in, sees large turd* ITS BACK! THE TURD! ME : *runs around the counter to the pool, trips on carpet and knocks over entire brocher rack* me: (deal with that later, I HAVE SOME SHIT TO TAKE CARE OF!) *at the pool* me: damn.....thats quite the deuce....atleast a 2 pounder *starts talking to myself in a steve irwin accent* me: wear hear in the confines of the pool room, in search of a veronious beast! SHHHHH *GRABS SCOOPER* aahw yea thar she is, just look at hur thear, she a absolute beauty! and shes a floata too! me: *lowers scooper, turd slide off the edge* awhh shes a fisty one she is! ima grab her tail! me: * trys to come from below and scoop it up, turd veirs away* shes a quick won! HUHO QUICK! THE SHELA IS MAKIN A BREAK FOR IT! me: *finaly scoops turd* HE SCOOPS HE SCORES!!!!!! * turns around see's hot girls laughing at me* me: *looks at turd on the scooper* (theres not a hole deep enough for me to craw off in right now) *drops turd in trash* * relocks pool goes to desk to commit suicide* 20 min later me: *watching youtube, probably supercharger videos around that time* dag: HAY, YOU BACK THUR? ME: (maybe if i sit reeeeeeeal still he will not see me) dag: HAY! *leans around counter* me; (FUCK! IT SAW ME) me: yes sir how ma.... dag: LISTIN THE INTRANET DONT WERK, YOU GOT US UNDER THESE LOUD FUCKING PEOPLE , YOUR POOL IS CLOSED AND IT AINT EVEN TIME TO CLOSE IT AND TO TOP IT OFF NOW MY TV DONT WORK me:im sorry sir (no im not) but i cant move you to another roome because we are full. dag: WELL WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT THIS! I WANT A GWAD DAMND DISCOUNT! ME: (no you need to put a shirt on, no one needs to see your "DD" man titties!) im sorry sir theres nothing i can do, you will need to talk to the manager in the..... dag: I DONT WANT TO HAVE TO WAKE UP EARLY AND COME THE FUCK DOWN HERE TO TALK TO A MANAGER I WANT THIS SHIT FIXED NOW! me: (and i want a decent blow job from my wife, but that shit aint going to happen either) im sorry bud but i cant do anything until morni...... dag: YOU CAN ATLEAST OPEN UP THE FUCKING POOL! me: sir i cant op.....SURE THING! TELL YA WHAT IF IT WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY I WILL OPEN THE POOL JUST FOR YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS BUT NO ONE ELSE, IS THAT OK? dag: now thats more like it *walks out the door* me: (BAWAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA!) 15 MINS LATER. DAG AND HIS WIFE ARE SWIMIN IN THE POO WATER LAGOON *chis walks in with beer* chris: *stops, looks at the two fuckers swiming in the pool* you know its past 11 right? you not suppost to let people swim past 11 me; i know chris: oooookkkk why do they get to swim? me: because i hate them chris:sooo you hate them and they get to swim.....is that the motherfucker that yelled at me for the inter net not working? me: yup, and some one shit in there earlier to day too chris: *snots beer out his nose* HAHAHHA WHAT THE FUCK? me: yup, fuck them chris: thats sooooo wrong me: yup chris: your going to hell for this but it sooooo worth it /rant
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proven-paradox · 7 years
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The Lesser Evil side sessions: Akali departs and Rav catches up with friends
<DM_Dox> ---
<DM_Dox> The next day dawns, and apparently people are beginning to prepare for another day of festivities. The previous night was a long and loud one, whether celebrating in the common room or trying fruitlessly to get some sleep above.
<Akali> Akali's already awake and staring at the ceiling by the time the sun begins to peer through her window.  The moment it does, she slips out of bed, already dressed for adventuring, collects up her weapons and an extra pack, then heads straight out of the inn without a word.  Easier done now that she'd changed inns.  She makes her way towards the south gate, where she'd seen caravans being arranged before.
<DM_Dox> As predicted on the day after the end of an extended siege, Akali spots a large number of merchants arranged around the gates, loading wagons and making the arrangements needed for the journey to Leyline.
<Akali> Akali grins just slightly upon seeing this, she gets to take her pick!  Probably.  She strolls along, peruuuusing the various carts, wagons and various modes of transportation, finally spotting the one that looks like the most comfy ride before stepping closer and tapping one of the people loading it on the shoulder.  "Hey, who's in charge of this thing?"
<DM_Dox> The young man Akali hailed looks a bit annoyed at being interrupted, but points to a portly gentleman in red robes and wearing a feathered cap. "'At'd be Boris there, miss."
<Akali> Akali smiles and thanks the man before heading on over to Boris, doing her best to look imposing but not quite threatening.  "Boris, is it?  Are you going to be accompanying your wagon to Leyline?"
<DM_Dox> Boris turns to Akali, speaking quickly. "Well I'm certainly not going to just leave my goods on the doorstep for folks to steal. What's it to you, miss?"
<Akali> "Theeen I assume you've been delayed a while, right?  Little gnoll problem?  One that eeeeveryone here seems to think is suddenly -over- just because we took out their camp?"  Akali keeps strolling, looking over the wagons.  "I took part in destroying their camp, yeah, but we didn't.... Destroy them, Boris.  We routed them.  Maaany fled Boris, and now they don't have a camp or supplies to lean on!  What do you think those gnolls will be up to now, Boris?" Akali grins knowingly.
<DM_Dox> Boris gives a dismissive wave. "Yes, yes, now that their siege of the city's broken the straggler's will be roaming the roads. I'm not stupid miss, and I've hired three guards to protect me during the journey. I don't have time for games right now. What do you want from me?"
<Akali> "Only three?  Hire another.  And not just any guard, bring me on board.  I've killed enough of these things and I'm eager to kill more on my way to Leyline."  Akali strolls back closer to the wagon, "It's rare for these gnolls to attack in groups smaller than ten, and when you've suddenly got a dozen of these mutts throwing spears down on you from the tree tops, well, you'll be glad to have me at your side."
<DM_Dox> Boris stops and seems to be actually taking stock of Akali for the first time since the conversation began. He twirls his mustache for a moment thoughtfully. "What's your price?"
<Akali> "Ehhh my going price is generally two hundred, but seeing as how I actually -want- to get to Leyline and if you're willing to hurry things a bit, one hundred will work for me.  I want to be there by sunset, else my price goes up."
<DM_Dox> Boris is clearly running some numbers in his head. After a moment, he nods. "Deal. Half now, half when we get there." He pops a pair of small coin pouches off his belt and casually tosses them to Akali. "Prep up, we leave in 20 minutes."
<Akali> Akali catches the pouches, quickly stashing them away.  "Good choice."
<DM_Dox> And with those arrangements made, Akali leaves Northwall, heading south, and away from the others trapped in TLE's game.
<DM_Dox> ---
<DM_Dox> ---
<DM_Dox> The next day dawns, and apparently people are beginning to prepare for another day of festivities. The previous night was a long and loud one, whether celebrating in the common room or trying fruitlessly to get some sleep above.
<Ravanya> Ravanya wakes up early that morning. She, in vain, searches for Akali for a short while before making her way out of the inn. After a short time shopping to replace her bow with a musket and discussing getting some barding for Shikari, she heads off to first check on Matthew-if she's able to get into the temple again.  
<DM_Dox> The temple is somewhat less busy than previous visits; efficient triage has seen folks with serious injuries tended to by now, leaving only non-life threatening injuries to be tended as the healers cycle through their daily spells. There are also half as many guards around as before.
<DM_Dox> Rav is ushered in by a middle aged acolyte. "Who are you looking for, dear?"
<Ravanya> "I'm here to see a friend," She replies as she motions to the direction of Matthew's room. "A man named Matthew, here for a somn addiction. Would this be an alright time to visit?"
<DM_Dox> She gives a sad looking smile and replies, "Ah, poor timing I'm afraid. He's actually asleep for a change right now. I fear if we disturbed him right now Mother Tullins would be rather angry with us. He is doing much better though!"
<Ravanya> "Oh!" Ravanya gives the acolyte a soft smile. "Well that is good to hear, and I am glad he is getting his rest. I will take my leave then, and return another time." She lifts her hand in a farewell. "Thank you for your time."
<DM_Dox> "Of course. What's your name? I can tell him y--" Her words are cut short as a woman's muffled shouting sounds from a side room. It sounds angry, like an argument going very badly for someone. The acolyte sends a sour look in that direction. "Ah, a moment luv." She stands and starts heading that way.
<Ravanya> The bard's eyes follow in the direction of the acolyte. Curious about the argument, she steps closer in attempt to hear what might be going on. Were it something that would take some time to settle, she would simply take her leave.
<DM_Dox> Listening in, Rav can just barely hear another feminine voice in the conversation, almost completely drowned out by the other woman's yelling. The louder woman is near frantic, shouting "I won't allow it! Absolutely out of the question!"
<DM_Dox> The acolyte cracks the door and pokes her head inside and speaks sternly. "Speak quietly or leave! We have patients who need their rest!"
<Ravanya> Curiosity getting the better of her, she now leans against the wall, just a little ways off from the door, to see if she can make out any more. Maybe there was a good story here somewhere!
<DM_Dox> The softer voice has gone completely quiet now, but the louder voice approaches the door, growling, "Which of you put her up to this!?" Rav can peek inside; a short middle aged woman in an expensive looking tailored dress is on the other side, glaring accusingly at the acolyte.
<DM_Dox> A familiar voice replies, "Mother, this is my own idea! You can't change my mind, not this time!" Rav would recognize Nadia's voice, the engineer girl who came with them on the first trip to the sewers.
<DM_Dox> Looking the woman over, Rav would see an obvious familiar resemblance. Nadia is taller, but they have very similar faces.
<Ravanya> Wanting to see if she can hear just what Nadia is going to be doing, she waits just a bit longer to see if anyone will say. But she does not try peeking again, not wanting to bring this mother's wrath upon her as well.
<DM_Dox> The acolyte is having none of it. "Mother's Mercy, if I have to waste a spell to silence your shouting, I'll get the guards here to detain you."
<DM_Dox> That was clearly the wrong approach, as Nadia's mother shouts a reply, "You wouldn't dare!"
<DM_Dox> "Would I!?" The acolyte shouts back. All activity in the main hall of the temple has stopped, all eyes locked on this brewing shouting match.
<DM_Dox> An armored man approaches, hand on his arming sword's hilt. "Ladies, is there a problem here?"
<Ravanya> It doesn't seem like there is going to be any more real discussion on the matter. Rav steps away from the wall, back to where she had been standing with the acolyte.
<DM_Dox> Things get a little quieter once an armed man is involved, but apparently they don't get more peaceful. A contentious conversation ensues, when ends with Nadia's mother being "escorted" away by the guard. Nadia herself emerges from the room, face red. Anger, embarrassment, or a combination of the two, it's unclear.
<Ravanya> "Ah, Nadia..." Ravanya makes effort to try to get the girl's attention. With a worried look she turns to her. "Is everything alright?" She tries not to fill her face too full of worry, not wanting Nadia to be self conscious.
<DM_Dox> Nadia sighs and nods to Rav. "Yeah. Mom's just... like that, I guess."
<Ravanya> She gives her a sympathetic smile. "I see. My father used to be like that, somewhat." She glances in the direction the guard and the mother took, before looking back to Nadia. "I overheard a little, what with the yelling. What is it you want to do that's gotten her so worked up?"
<DM_Dox> "Well..." She sighs again. "I've decided to join the Reavers. Heard one of them talking about building a stronghold to the north or something? Trying to get a base closer to here so if this gnoll siege comes up they can respond quicker, as I understand it. Same engineers were talking about being stretched thin, so I asked if they were hiring on a whim..."
<Ravanya> "Oh. Well that certainly is quite a surprise!" Ravanya's smile grew to a cheerful one. "I can see why your mother might be worried, but it is a choice you can be proud of. With how brave you are, they will be lucky to have you. Have you told your uncle yet?"
<DM_Dox> She nods. "He said it makes a lot of sense. Said to be careful, seemed happy about it." She shrugs and adds, "...Also wanted to be far, far away when I told Mom."
<Ravanya> She let out a burst of laughter. "I can imagine! I'm sure that your mother would have immediately blamed him were he in the room. I am happy he is supporting your decision, though. I'm sure in time your mother will also find a way to accept it."
<Ravanya> "Or you can just do what I did and not ever go back home. But I don't recommend that." She adds with a slight shrug.
<DM_Dox> Nadia rolls her eyes. "Doubt it. She can keep a grudge going for a long time. But whatever, she wants me to get married off to some merchant and spend my life doing nothing like she did. To hell with that." She practically radiates bitterness.
<Ravanya> Ravanya's smile fades at that, but she still attempts a light hearted tone. "Ah I see. I understand exactly how you feel. But I'm sure your mother loves you Nadia, perhaps some day she'll see the error of her ways...Ah, but, I've taken enough of your time. I'm sure you have a lot to do now."
<DM_Dox> She nods. "Yeah, gotta get my stuff packed up. Nice to see you again Rav." She nods and gives a forced smile.
<Ravanya> She nods. "Hopefully next time we'll meet under more happy circumstances." She gives her one last smile before turning to leave the temple.
<DM_Dox> Nadia nods and moves to go back into the side room she emerged from. The acolyte nods to Rav on he way out and waves, saying, "Sorry about that. I'll let Matthew know you visited when he wakes up."
<DM_Dox> On her way out, she catches eye of Terril entering the temple, noticing her quickly. "Oh, Ravanya, how fortuitous! I was going to seek you out after concluding my business here."
<Ravanya> Ravanya significantly brightens up when she sees Terril and steps closer to him. "Ah, Good morning! How have you been fairing since the return? I'm sure you've been kept quite busy." She tilts head head to the side, smiling. "I wasn't expecting to see you again so soon. Is your business here urgent? If so, I can wait outside till you are done."
<DM_Dox> He nods to the first question. "Well enough, but as you said, busy and busier. Alas, 'tis part of my duties." To the second he shakes his head. "So long as it is done before sundown, I need to discuss something with Lady Tullins. That can wait though. How have you been, milady?"
<Ravanya> "Ah, I have been well. I am in much better spirits now. A situation that had my group stressed is seemingly settled, and it seems my friend staying here is doing well. Also, I just spoke to Captain Calther's niece. It seems she has decided to join the Reavers, and she told me about the plans to make a new base in the area."
<DM_Dox> "Oh, the new base?" He clears his throat nervously. "Ah, those plans are... not finalized yet. We still need to speak with the Dals who use the land, the Sunstones I believe. I would thank you not to talk too much about that?" He sounds a bit sheepish at the end.
<Ravanya> "Oh, of course." She gives a nod. "I won't go telling anyone."
<DM_Dox> "All the same, glad things are well with you, and to hear of our new member. I hope she works as hard as her uncle."
<Ravanya> "I can promise you she will. She wants to prove herself. I've seen first hand how brave she can be. Nadia will make an excellent Reaver."
<DM_Dox> "Good to hear, good to hear." Terril nods. "So, if I may. There is a ball being held tomorrow evening, celebrating  Northwall's liberation. Would you care to accompany me to this celebration?"
<Ravanya> A cheery, giddy expression comes over Ravanya. "Of course, I would be delighted!"
<DM_Dox> Terril grins as well. "Wonderful! I do look forward to it."
<DM_Dox> "You should tell your comrades that they are welcome to attend as well. Your role in the battle has earned you that right."
<Ravanya> "I'm having trouble locating one of them at the moment," She replies with a sigh, "But I shall certainly let them all know, and will try to convince them all to attend."  
<DM_Dox> He nods. "That would be much appreciated. Do you need help seeking the other out? Should we be concerned?"
<Ravanya> Ravanya shakes her head. "No, I believe Akali is actively avoiding Neera and myself because of the argument we had. It is something to be handled amongst ourselves, no need for alarm."
<DM_Dox> "Ah... This is what you were talking about before, after the battle I assume?"
<Ravanya> "Yes. I have yet to be able to sit down and discuss things with her. While what happened is still not something I agree with, I let my emotions get the better of me and didn't act as a companion should." She frowns. "But I'm sure everything will be alright. She has to be around me eventually."
<DM_Dox> He nods. "Well if you change your mind let me know and I can have some men help search for her."
<Ravanya> "I thank you, but you and your men are busy enough as it is." She smiles again, waving off the topic. "Was there anything else you needed of me?"
<DM_Dox> "That is all for now. I am very much looking forward to seeing you tomorrow though. I should return to my business, Lady Tullins is likely at least as busy as I."
<Ravanya> "Of course! I look forward to tomorrow." she bows her head politely. "Until then, Captain."
<DM_Dox> As Terril walks off, Rav hears a message from the ring. It's Captain Calther's voice. <Is this working? I'm at the sanitarium. Raido is here and he is unconscious. I want you lot here ASAP.>
<DM_Dox> ---
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