Waterboard me 🌊
I'm trying to drown, but like it's also hot.
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The sky was super pretty last night. It’s probably my favorite part of living where I do. Sunset is always beautiful.
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what’s up!!! i’m having the week from hell rn babes but guess what!!!! fic coming tomorrow!!!!! idk if it’s gonna be fluff or angst or a part 2 of something but we’ll see!!!!
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look at this pink range rover in the grocery store parking lot I love her
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sometimes i feel like i missed out on a lot of "italian-ness" bc we stopped going there on a regular basis when i was 9 and i hardly ever saw that side of the family but then i come across a video on youtube titled "southern italians arguing" and it's just a civil (but lively) discussion about a card game the men were in the middle of playing and i'm getting flashes of what it sounds like when my sicilian dad gets real angry and it reminds me of that one time last year when i was working as an intern at a theater (in austria) and one of my tasks was to feed the actors their lines during rehearsals and one time the lead actor came up to me saying "i'm sorry that i'm always so snappy and impatient when i ask for my lines" and i went "this is nothing?? no offense taken"
or this other time, i can't remember if it was at that theater as well or if it was a different context (still in austria) but one time someone got a little loud with me (bc they were irritable and it didn't have anything to do with me or anything that i'd done) and afterwards those who were witnessing the situation were telling me "you do know you don't have to let yourself be treated like that and that you can tell them off, right?" and i was just there like ".......wait i was getting yelled at just now????"
i'm so used to my sicilian dad (and my half-sicilian brother) getting loud at any random minor inconvenience that it for real didn't even register that this person was "yelling" at me for austrian standards, ESPECIALLY since i knew i hadn't done anything wrong and it was all them and their bad mood at the time. and while i did realize that this person wasn't having the best of times in that moment, the fact that they were getting loud at me just simply didn't register. my brain honest to god just went "ah yes this is a completely Normal volume for this level of bad mood, cool cool" and i just kept chilling while everyone around me went "the audacity?? how could they be so rude to you?? are you okay??"
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trying not to think about the fact that our rent + utilities + internet is about as much as i make in a month. sometimes more sometimes less depending on utilities. that is not including gas and groceries. i go through a full tank in 2/3rds of a week. gas is like 5/gal. augh. fucking hate it here,
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