barris has a choke hold on me but there’s just something about thommy…like my first love that showed me all the fantastical things about sharing your heart with someone and who i still often think about (though i’d never admit it for fear of my husband, my fourth love, growing green with jealousy) when the sun shines just so and the breeze blows just the right amount to waft the scent of fresh grass and magnolias to my nose, just like the kind we used to run through together before we understood the harsh reality of the world and our hands touched one last time and our eyes met with the knowledge that we would never again have the pleasure to see each others physical form but that we would never forget the hushed whispers in the moonlight or the gentle giggles hidden behind the old wooden fence or even the way our hearts seemed to intertwine and beat as though they were one single organ which they might as well have been, born from the same vine as we were and growing around each other until it became suffocating and we needed to branch away from one another lest we come too far together in a mutated, wretched lump of cells.
I started my period this morning, and I’ve had a horrible day. I’m so sore and shaky and groggy. Plus, I have a choir concert this Sunday… and my choir/the MC is going to have to deadname me because my parents are probably coming, they weren’t supposed to be. I’m just. I wanna cry. I wanna be held. I hate this.
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Oh, darling, I'm so sorry to hear that. C'mere, I'll give you a big hug and many cuddles.
Periods suck so much, I'm sorry 😞 They really can throw off your entire day.
I'm sorry to hear that you're going to be deadnamed. Oh god, that really is terrible, love. You can cry, you're allowed to feel sad and upset and frustrated and even angry at this situation. I'll hold you close, darling, put your head on Mommy's chest and just let it all out, okay? I'll give you soft head kisses and whisper that you're so valid, your gender identity is valid, and so is your name. I'll remind you that the shittiness doesn't last forever, and that your chosen family and friends love you so much for you who you are. I'll hold you tight, if you want, so your nervous system can get a little bit of regulating. I'll stroke your back slowly as I whisper to you, "You're going to get through this. It's going to be okay. I'm right here, darling."
I know you've heard it a thousand times, but it will get better, angel. And I am so, so sorry you're in this circumstance 😞
sunflower from spiderman into the spiderverse always reminds me of the best friendship i’ve ever had <3 it’s such good memories and makes me smile and man i fuckin miss it :’) i tell my therapist all the time of the fact it was probably the first healthy bpd friendship i had it’s crazy
he used to redirect my emotions and explain why what i was doing wasn’t good and what i could do instead and why it was good i do that instead and he was just so patient, i miss him so much.
Mommy I’m so overstimulated and hot and everything’s too loud and too bright and I need to calm down
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Oh darling, I'm sorry that you're overstimulated right now!
I'd suggest holing up in bed, with all the lights turned out! Maybe some earplugs if you have them, sweet! What helps me most is finding somewhere quiet (my bed), pulling the covers up and over me, and breathing for a little!