#But I still want to be considerate to the sensitive folk out there.

[loupy-mongoose]

WARNING: THIS PART CONTAINS IMPLIED DEATH...

PREVIOUS NEXT (Finale)

START | CHRONO

This is where it started. This idea.

A human trapped under debris in a collapsing building, and a Mew taking his memories to "save" him...

That idea is the seed from which Linden Roots grew...

Judging by the asks and theories I've received, a looooot of you saw this coming. I've loved reading all the theories, even if I didn't reply to the vast majority of them! (I've seen several mentions of Detective Pikachu--While I did watch it years ago, I had forgotten about that element of the movie. It could've been a subconscious influence.)

This one cements the answer to the big question of my story, but the facility arc isn't done quite yet. There's one more to go. One more part of Mo's sendoff...

#Pokemon #Linden Roots #Past #Comic #art #I hate having the warning on top because I feel it spoils the moment #But I still want to be considerate to the sensitive folk out there. #lab #full

[heartfullofleeches]

Not to be gay on main but do you perhaps have any spare LockJaw headcanons that you wouldn't mind sharing with us? 👉👈 Can be SFW or NSFW, I'm not picky.. I just wouldn't mind taking a bite outta that feisty lil jawbreaker 👀 LMAO

[Here ya go! Sfw for now, but there's always the future-]

LockJaw is a very head strong jawbreaker. Aside from literally being able to crack a person's skull open with her own - she takes little shit from anyone including her darling... But she is far more lenient with them. Once upon a time she was a slightly kinder and patient person, but after losing part of her face she is less accepting to strangers. At her heart, LockJaw is fiercely loyal to those she deems worthy of her faith and to harm them is to bruise her - and you really don't want to do that.

LockJaw is far more caring of those around her than she lets off. Her cold nature and initial hesitance to touch/interact with her darling is because she's afraid of her own strength. She has more control than she realizes, but there's always that what-if. As her bond with Darling grows, Lock will wrap her hands in the softest materials she can get her hands on. When they lay in bed together, LockJaw will put a marshmallow pillow beneath her shirt to support them better. She softens her voice and rarely yells if they are the sensitive type, and is considerate enough to tells them to look away before she spills fresh blood.

LockJaw is extremely touch starved, but tries not to let that side of her show. She also treats her darling like they're made of glass. Does all the heavy lifting, grabs everything from higher shelves, demands to know why they need a knife before she gives it to them when they're just trying to make dinner- even carries them on her shoulder if they complain of the tiniest aches or pains. If her darling desires their own free will or to go for a walk without her glaring everyone down, all they really have to do is hold her hand for a while or give her a smooch on the cheek. This also stops her from punching a hole through someone's face and calms her down like a flame to a fire when enraged.

Scary Dog Privileges - LockJaw is the type to hover in the background whenever her darling is out and about or talking to someone. One wrong move and she will remove her darling from the situation. Even something as small as using a tone she's not fond of will get someone thrown across the room. Did I mention she's a big motherfucker? I'm still playing around with her height, but she's well over six feet and has the muscle/strength to back up her warnings to folks who refuse to listen to her.

Darling both improves and worsens her behavior. She gains back some of that patience she lost in earlier years and tries to use her words more than her fists, but make them cry and it's lights out. She'll "apologize" if there was a misunderstanding, but by tone alone it's easy to pick up she doesn't mean a word of what she says.

(Hope that's enough for now! I love this hot-headed jawbreaker and can't wait to do more with her and the rest of the cast)

#yandere oc #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #female yandere #yandere headcanons #yandere insert #yandere blurb #yandere #perfectly sweet #LockJaw my oc #yandere candy

[bonefall]

Ask Etiquette

HELLO sorry for the intimidating post lmao, I just need something to toss up on the masterpost because I feel bad deleting asks and then people will never really have an idea of why I never answered them

I get a ton of asks (usually anywhere from 10 - 20 a day!) and I'm not able to get to them all! I try to answer as many as possible but I'm still just one guy. So with that in mind, there are some sorts of asks I will simply not answer, and some 'requests' I have for people who send them in;

Please keep your asks short PLEASE try not to send me essays if you want a response; I still love reading them! But if you send me walls of text/analysis you are asking me to write a lot in response, which I'd rather spend on actually writing or designing cats. (On that note if you send a bunch of questions at once, the likelihood I respond goes down.)

Do not send me personal questions Listen... I'm a stranger on the internet. I'm overjoyed to see when my art connects with people and helps you realize things! But don't ask me sensitive questions like how to move out of your abusive parents' house!! PLEASE learn internet safety and get less comfortable with volunteering that kind of information to people you don't know!

Do not ask me personal questions you do not need to know what i study or where i work. get less comfortable asking these sorts of questions to queer people on the internet, especially when they talk openly about having previously been abused or stalked. (not that a person should even need to be as open about that as i am)

If I don't have a good response I won't answer Especially for suggestions I don't vibe with. I try to only say "No" if I have a particularly interesting "No" to talk about, if that makes sense! If I had to write a full explanation for every veto or idea I don't vibe with, this blog would be 90% what isn't in BB.

No AUs within the AU. "What if Hawkfrost survived his impalement? What if Firestar never joined? What if Tigerstar was never born?" Listen, buddy, you're creating an exponential distraction for possible ways the story could have gone and I'm not looking to write several essays for the literal hundreds of alternative ways Clan history could have been written. It takes you 5 words to ask "What if X never died" but it takes me paragraphs to answer. (This isn't about suggestions btw, I very specifically mean ppl asking hypotheticals for fun.)

Don't be rude. I feel like this should go without saying but please mind the parasocial gap. Especially if you're on anon, I don't know you, your backstory, or your cadence.

And, lastly, CLANMEW ASKS!!

I make a hard effort to get to everyone!! Those are published on Clanmew Day (WHICH IS NOW JUST GOING TO BE THE 30TH OF EVERY MONTH SO THAT IT'S LESS CONFUSING) but PLEASE understand I get a ton of them.

As I write this I have more than 26 tabs open of unanswered Clanmew asks, a lot more in my inbox, and 9 already in the queue. So that you understand the sheer volume of asks I have there.

If I didn't get to you that month, chances are that I'll get to you on the next, but please understand why I ask for folks to not re-send asks

So here's Clanmew-specific requests;

PLEASE just try a translation on your own first! Don't just send me raw lists of OCs to translate, give it a go first using the Lexicon, just so I can see you tried. I will happily and gladly make more specific words for you when I see you try!

When you send OCs you've translated, ask me for a new word at the end if you didn't already in your list. Just in case I can't think of a witty comment or a word suggestion, you will help me a lot

Please try to format with lists like this one Folks will send me double or triple-indented lists and it will take up my entire screen when they've only sent like, 5 names. Remember that posts you send to me go on people's dashes, be considerate please You can open a list like this by starting a new paragraph, typing -, and then an immediate space. Hold Shift + Enter to indent without adding another bullet.

If you could put "Clanmew" somewhere in your ask, like even if you open up with "Clanmew: Here is my question blah blah," it would help immensely I physically can't get to every ask I receive on Clanmew Day, so if you have "Clanmew" in your ask somewhere, it makes it a lot easier for me to find it when I can finally answer! I really wish Tumblr had ways to sort asks, but currently, I've just gotta make due with Cntrl + F.

#I currently have 900+ asks btw #Bone Babble #EDIT: See that 900+ number? It's now actually 1100+

[genderqueerpositivity]

Content warning: ADHD medication and medical stuff

A few months ago I started taking Adderall after being diagnosed with ADHD. The results have been kind of mixed. We've adjusted the dose a bit here and there, gone back and forth on the benefits of immediate release vs extended release.

And the whole time I've been getting gradually more uncomfortable with having this...window of usefulness, at most 4-5 hours, of feeling normal and productive and emotionally stable. For less time than a typical shift at work. And then it wears off and I feel irritable and like my tolerance for sensory input is at 0. In fact, I think my sensory sensitivities might actually be considerably fucking worse on stimulants even if my general executive functioning is better. My sensitivity to sound is especially affected.

The answer every time has been to increase the dose...which is an effective solution for only a few weeks at most.

I don't know if this is typical for any other AuDHD folks but it has been my experience. I am also not passing judgment on anyone at all when I say the following: I don't want to have to rely on amphetamines to get shit done and feel (very temporarily) emotionally regulated.

I know that stimulant meds are a life changer for a lot of ADHDers. I just feel like it might not be for me. Not for my brain, not with my health issues, not with my family history of certain conditions.

Which is disappointing, actually. Not the outcome I was hoping for when I set out to be evaluated and diagnosed. I was hoping this would be the missing explanation and the solution basically. I have a better understanding now of my executive functioning issues, but I'm still struggling to deal with them.

Anyway, I'm switching to a non-stimulant medication. And I'm a little nervous about it, as I am with most new meds. I'm just hoping that it helps and that the side effects aren't worse than those I've been dealing with for the past few months.

When I get around to picking the stuff up, probably tomorrow, I'm starting Strattera. I'm already doing the googling (ono) but if anyone who sees this would like to share experiences, I'm all ears.

#actuallyadhd #actuallyaudhd #medication tw #medical tw #personal #not a positivity post

[dissociationawareness]

The irony for me is that all throughout our childhood and teens we were written off as dramatic and attention seeking because we had outbursts of intense emotions, but since at least fourth grade I remember recognizing that I was stuffing my feelings and that resulted in them exploding.

The reality is that I repressed a lot, I ignored a lot, and I belittled myself a lot. When someone told me to calm down or that I was being dramatic, I did exactly what they wanted: I shut down. It never stopped the feelings, it pushed them out of view for their comfort.

Still to this day, people take my emotions as childish and over-the-top when they're negative, and still to this day I keep them out of view of people as much as possible... but they still creep out, and when they do they're nearly the sum of how much I've stuffed.

The irony of this is that I've found only one way to keep them under control: letting them out in controlled bursts, usually online where I get belittled for them, or in private where I increasingly feel isolated and alone.

See, the answer for people like me is to express ourselves, to feel heard and supported.

People may not like intense, negative emotions... and that includes ourselves! We don't like feeling them or putting them on display anymore than anyone likes seeing them.

See, emotions are vulnerability, and expressing them in front of someone feels unsafe.

My therapist has told me many times to open up, to talk to others about what I'm going through, to let my friends in. My experience, however, is that doing so opens me up for ridicule, which most people will take advantage of (and some of them well-intentioned).

The more I stuff, the more builds up... and it has to come out sometime... be that through me or another that lives in this body with me (cus let's be real, emotions sometimes spread through us like a virus, especially if we're co-con). Feelings don't tend to stay perfectly contained in their little boxes, they tend to grow and fester when repressed - sometimes it feels like that's the very nature of some of them and that's why some of them fit into the category of memory-keepers, and furthermore why those others tend to be considerably more emotional than the rest of us.

If I'm able to find outlets, I'm able to keep the outbursts under control. I cry on my way home, or in the bathroom, or in the dark by myself.

I'm still extremely emotional and sensitive, afterall... I haven't magically become a different person from who I was as a child. I'm still "immature" and "dramatic", but no one can call me attention-seeking when they don't see those things.

It seems that society still doesn't recognize that no one has control over their emotions - we can't control how we feel. All we control is our actions, in whatever way that's even possible, and how much of the feelings bleed out into our lives (and how ironic that it often does without our control).

It seems like most people are too stuck in their own experiences to remember that everyone's different - different feelings, different experiences, different coping mechanisms, different tolerances.

We also all have different ways of expressing things and different intensities of those expressions at different times.

If I could teach folks one thing it would be to find outlets, be that online or IRL, be that verbal, written, artistic... so long as they don't hurt yourself or others. Don't think of your emotions as ridiculous, recognize they exist for a reason (but also that they're not always a reflection of reality). Don't try to stop yourself from feeling unless it's unsafe for you to do so in that moment.

Let yourself feel. Let yourself be sad. Let yourself be scared. Let yourself be angry.

Allowing yourself to exist and feel is extremely healing... even anger can be extremely healing. The voice that tells you those feelings are unnecessary is the voice that the world has injected into your spirit and it has no place in healing.

So, no matter what anyone thinks about it, let those feelings out. You'll no doubt find that they're easier to deal with when they're not repeatedly stuffed in a box and let to fester.

And most of all: be kind to yourself, especially if no one else ever has... it's your job now to give yourself the understanding that you've been denied.

#actuallymultiple #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused #actuallydid #actuallydissociative #actuallytraumagenic #emotions #coping #emotional regulation

[ladylookslikeadude1]

Sitting in a hospital waiting room all alone Izumi trembles silently, holding Shoko's hand. This is an appointment for her rainbow baby and her relationship with Shouta has been going downhill. Th estress and anxiety is killing her and her baby. She has ran out of excuses and justifications for a man who is never there. So imagine her surprise when she sees Shouta sitting on the couch a bouquet of flowers laying listlessy on the ground and hands holding the unsigned divorce papers she had got for her own reassurance. Cue a long heart to heart that doesn't exactly end in cuddling but things going in right direction.

Mind the tags folks, I don't want anyone triggered by this. I'm putting it under a cut because I know this is a sensitive subject for some.

The miscarriage had devestated both Shouta and Izumi.  She knew that Shouta had wanted that baby, and losing her had broken him in a way she couldn't quite comprehend-just like it had shattered her in a way he'd never truly understand.  So when she'd ended up pregnant again, she'd excused the way that he was never at any of the appointments, the way that he avoided any mention of the baby.  But at this point, gripping Shouto's hand tightly as the doctor told her that the stress of virtually hiding her pregnancy from her husband was going to kill her and the baby if she wasn't careful, she realized that the divorce papers she'd had drawn up a few weeks ago might be for more than just her own peace of mind.

Coming home to Shouta sitting on the couch, a bouquet of flowers wilted on the floor as he stared at the divorce papers he'd found was honestly just the cherry on top of an already terrible day.  "Are you going to leave me?"  Shouta asked hoarsely, hands clenched around the divorce papers to the point the pages threatened to rip.  

"I don't know," Izumi said tiredly.  "I think…you and I need to have a very honest conversation, because you don't want to talk about the baby.  You don't want to hear about the baby, and I've been trying to hide the fact that I'm six months pregnant to be considerate of that-because if I don't you disappear for days.  But the stress of it is literally killing me Shouta, and I can't do it anymore."

Letting the papers flutter to the floor, Shouta buried his face in his hands.  "I didn't want you to hide it, I'm so sorry," he whispered.  "I-It was hard, seeing you pregnant and remembering our little girl, and I'm so scared it'll happen again.  Or that I'll lose you this time instead."

Izumi hesitated before going to sit by him, rubbing his back gently.  His seeming apathy had been the reason for the divorce papers.  But she could work with his fear, because fear at least meant he wanted the baby-and that he still wanted her.

#miscarriage mention #rainbow baby #ladylookslikeadudeanswers #female midoriya izuku #my writing #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #my fanfiction #boku no hero academia fanfiction #my hero academia fanfiction #aizawa shouta/midoriya izuku #aideku #writing prompts #writing prompt answers

[redux-iterum]

Out of curiosity, what *exactly* do you think went wrong with your original Redux to the point that it caused you to start Iterum?

God, what didn't go wrong? There were so many things at play, even excluding the less-than-stellar attention I was receiving at the time (as major of a factor as it was). Which, to be fair, was at least partially justified by the Redux's content, but partially overblown and, frankly, still confusing to me to this day.

The root problem - that which can explain almost every smaller problem - was that I was zeroed in on subversion of canon above all else. That's why some of the plot twists made no sense on a second of consideration, and why things that I just added in at random were out of left field and not actually helpful to the story, regardless of how long I'd had them in mind. Once in a while it worked out (Tigerclaw's trial remains my favorite part of the Redux), but a lack of setup and thought cost me quality in the name of shock value.

There's also the factor that I was improvising a great deal of the Redux. I have a bad habit of planning chapters out for fics and then going off the rails a bit too much (Steorra suffers from this as well), and that happened a fuckton more when I was starting my writing career. I didn't have an editor or betas like I do now. I didn't have someone to course-correct and rein me in when I started getting too wild. Sandstorm's death was on-the-fly, as the biggest one I can remember. It bought temporary self-satisfaction at the reactions of readers and nothing else. Though posting it on Christmas of all days was a delight, I can admit it.

The simple truth is that, when the Redux started, I was fresh out of high school and only had a comic and some choose-your-own-adventure threads on a forum as my experiences for writing. I was very used to making things up as I went along thanks to reader interactions on all of those stories with a vague overall idea of what I was aiming for. Plotting concrete, serial events that all linked together and made a coherent, large-scale story was not something I was good at or even knew how to do. After I quit the Redux, I made a mediocre book as my first foray into actual literature, which I don't think is worth attention, but it gave me enough experience to get the basic idea down of how to tell a long-term tale. The comic helped immensely as well - if not improving in art style, improving in the details of writing something good (character interactions, dialog, worldbuilding, etc). That gave me the confidence I needed to return to this world with a fresh eye.

I would, however, be remiss if I didn't at least acknowledge that the drama I was pulled into at the time was a major factor in me losing my zeal for the Redux and was part of what went wrong. Y'all know that I try my damndest to stay out of arguments and avoid sensitive topics in case they drum up some trouble. Against my will, drama found me and I was in the spotlight of Tumblr's favorite past-time in those days: finding issues, minute or major, and berating the target until they slink into the dark, never to be seen again. I won't argue that I was free of critique-worthy habits, but I still hold that folks assumed the worst of me and decided I was being deliberately malicious and arrogant instead of being a reclusive twentyteen who was uneducated and just wanted to write a fanfic and have fun with fans. Not everyone was vicious towards me, but enough people were that I left the fandom and to this day refuse to interact with it beyond my small circle surrounding Iterum.

If I remembered any of the rest of the Redux, I could probably go into detail about how this plot point was stupid or this lore bit was too edgy. Alas, I don't. I hope this discussion of the grander problems is satisfactory!

#ask #anonymous #real talk #i speak #redux #writing

[anotherghoul666]

For your "which ghoul type am I" post, voila le breadown bc I ran out of room :))

Hybrid Ghoul

It may not be super Canon, but I see you as a triple-threat hybrid. Something rare. Something uncommon, in a good way. Something special! A compilation of multiple talents, more than a "jack-of-all-trades master-of-none" Multi. A certified class act! I tried really hard putting this together so appreciate it, dammit!

Fire + Air + heavy on the Quintessence...

Fire - you are brave and bold, with (what I interpret as) a 'tell 'em like it is' personality. That may have gotten you into trouble when you were younger, honestly it might still, but folks prefer honesty to sugar-coating. Also, I imagine you are short and fiesty irl. Feel free to correct me if I am wrong (I am NOT tho, I can tell).

Air - when I think Air ghouls I think of the ghoulettes - classy, a little silly, kind, great style. Take ur pick, dude. Like, you can be so cool, calm, and collected (a la Cirrus, especially the dom attitude). A little fireball of energy and ideas - how very Sunshine of you. Don't forget comforting and gracious - Cumulus.

Quintessence - you have this wonderful ability to foster friendships and make meaningful connections with folks who would otherwise be complete strangers. You're supportive, considerate, thoughtful of folks' feelings and ideas. Even if you don't understand, you make a point to try and see things from another perspective. You have such a wealth of knowledge and share it willingly.

Q ghouls are a model for how folks should act - kindly and with empathy - and this is very much how I see you! I see you as a pillar in the community (in more ways than one) and people are all the better for having known you.

OKAY, THIS WAS A LOT LONGER THAN I THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE. I HOPE ITS NOT TOO MUCH ❤️‍🔥

CAAIIITTTTT!! Darling? what?! This is SO SWEET?! Thank you so much for taking the time to write this in such details for me ❤️ I appreciate it alright, so so much.

The idea of a triple-element hybrid is so cool!

Fire: so my reflex is to bat away the "brave" trait immediately, because I feel I'm much more of an avoidant person than a brave one. That being said, if I look back at all the shit I went through and still pushed, I have to admit there is an amount of bravery there. So while I would never use that term to describe myself because my automatic thoughts say I don't deserve it, I'll accept the compliment and sincerely thank you for it. I sure am bold. I am 100% a "tell it like it is" person, and yes indeed my brutal honesty has gotten me in trouble consistently to this day. You'd be surprised but most people I find, like it better if you coddle them and you cushion what you say. The shit sandwich communication tactic and all that. But I can't do that. I treat others like I want to be treated, and I want direct and transparent honesty, so I have to give that same thing. It's all about internal coherence. I am both indeed short of stature xD and short of temper, though it's for minor annoyances. I'm difficult to legitimately anger, but I am short fused when it comes to being frustrated or irritated, yeah. You're not wrong!!

Air: besides stylish (because I do not give a fuck about style or looks 99% of the time XD) I appreciate the other compliments and feel flattered you think of me this way ❤️ The idea that I'm comforting like Cumulus is hits a lot, I aspire to be cause she's such a comfort character ❤️

Quintessence: isn't it funny how irl I can't maintain friendships for shit, all my life I've been the person with no friends that's "too weird" for people to tolerate. And yet online, contact is so easy with yall. I can be who I am here, I can speak how I speak and give my opinions and hot takes and it's valued. Instead of being problems that makes people uncomfortable, my directness, my transparency and honesty, my hyper-empathy, my hyper-sensitivity, those are things that yall are accepting of here and that you appreciate. This little corner of the internet we made for ourselves is so welcoming and warm. I'm honored to contribute to it in the way that aligns with my values of radical acceptance, open-mindedness and holding space for the marginalized. It's as you said, I don't always understand, and I don't always agree with people, but I believe there are ways to have civilized conversations people can grow from about everything. I'm happy that shines through and yall can feel a bit of the good I'm trying to do. I approach life, people and spaces with a "leave it better than you when you found it" mentality. So be it by sharing knowledge, educating, supporting, etc., I just wanna leave yall with more than before I crossed paths with you in the end. 🥰

This means the absolute world to me Cait, and Imma keep it close to my heart. Thank you for your valuable input ❤️

#asks #anotherghoul's element poll

[ohleander]

3.14

Today, the dissociation and masking has been really intense and everything feels okay but I also feel like I've been on autopilot since I woke up this morning. Its like I go through the day, holding my breath and my nose underwater until I can breathe again, but I don't actually feel like I've surfaced yet.. dissociation feels a lot like holding my breath under water. And its not bad until its too late and I need some air. I'm so thankful I only have 2 days left before a 5 day vacation. The autopilot is starting to wear me out. My job is so social and so connective but also so dis-connective at the same time.. its like, in order to connect with work I have to disconnect from myself and I have a hard time getting that back in 1 evening or 1 day. And I often feel so bad about not being able to be more engaged with dad and connective with him in the evenings. Its hard for me to stay social in the evenings, cause my neurodivergent brain just really needs some good quiet time.. quiet time or quiet and connective attention. I think he forgets I don't get a lot of love in my life.. the expectation to be OK and on it at all times feels kinda high.

Ways I notice my dissociation & masking getting worse.... 1) I take really really short breaths without realizing it or no breaths at all. 2) Time goes by exceptionally fast, I feel like I'm missing big spaces of time during my day and I don't know where they go. 3) I get irritable, quiet, my thoughts start focusing on sensory input only... 4) my reactions to things are like an auto-reply, my personal emotions and connections to things stops. I withdraw. 5) songs and phrases start getting stuck in my head for days at a time. I repeat things over and over. I script my conversations more.

My main goal in life, my main passion in life has always been to understand myself. That's my biggest goal and my biggest passion and for so soooo long, I thought that was a selfish thing.. so I didn't indulge in it very much and I think I lost a lot of myself thru that. Trying to gain all that back in a short amount of time has been difficult but rewarding and I aim to keep doing so. I wanna keep my goal of trying to understand myself and I'd like to film it or document it in some way so folks who want to can come along and support me. I also want to do the same for others. I believe wholeheartedly in reciprocity. Its something I value a lot. Reciprocity and consideration, kindness. Generous is something I wish I was more of. I also wish I were nicer and more patient with dad. Its hard for me to swallow where he is with his own life because so much of it hinges on me and I just wish I got more out of it than I do.. I need to try and find better things to focus on in our relationship but its hard. It often feels like I'm taking care of a child that I did not ask for.. and I think back to the way I felt as a child, left alone so often when things were tough. I empathize with dad so much, I think he can be both incredibly selfish and selfless all at the same time. I wish I didn't get so irritable when he rambles so much and I wish I could tell him/ask him to change something without worrying about him taking things personally or getting hurt. He's so sensitive and its tough sometimes. He takes things very personally out of the blue so Its always a bit hard talking to him. I love him dearly but I also need more more more substance in my daily life.. all I do is work and come hang out with him. I feel like I'm keeping him company here at the end of his life but I also feel a bit bored and trapped at times.. he gets paranoid when I'm out for too long and he gets so anxious when I go on trips, I don't even go places much anymore. I cater a lot of my life around him and I have a lot of freedom but only around the house and even then, I still feel like I'm a guest at his place. I also feel like I'm trying hard to break our codependency but for him, it seems to be getting worse. I'm still not sure where his mind is at these days. At times he seems like a regular adult, like the dad I have always known but other times, he acts like a child.. a straight up 8 year old. The truth is, as of right now, I have a lot of superficial support and not a lot of real and actual support. I don't have a lot of people I can talk to about the reality of my situation at home. My workplace only knows a portion of it and the few folks I can talk to, I don't want to burden with heavy things. Venting about dad is something I don't wanna be doing or like doing at all, but I've got to sometimes. Its hard to make sense of things sometimes. Its sometimes hard to feel like I'm not wasting a lot of my life doing what I'm ding right now. A lot of the time, I'm content with this but other times, I'm so restless and I want all of this to change. I have to realize these manic episodes aren't realistic nor are they what I really want. I am bored and need enrichment. I see it in Cleo too. In many ways I feel like I kept pet, something that's loved and provided for but not on a fundamental level.. cause on a fundamental level, my purpose is to make someone else feel more comfortable, regardless of how I feel about it.

I sure hope my hard work pays off in a way that I can actually feel some day.. cause sometimes I don't feel it and I have to be okay and accepting of that. It doesn't make me a bad person to not feel absolutely grateful or rewarded all the time with whats on my plate. I get tired and my plate is fucki'n heavy to digest and I do have a few regrets from time to time. Yeah, overall everything is really splendid but balancing it all... balancing it all is exhausting.. and while I can look at the plate and go "yeah it looks great, we've done a good job" that doesn't change the fact that its heavy to hold and wears me out sometimes. Sometimes I gotta put it down

LA

[grapelumber56]

Some Known Factual Statements About TYPICA CAFE

The Typica Coffee Variety: What Is It & Why Is It so Important? When talking about what goes right into a Coffee Variety, it is probably extra necessary than you believe. Many folks probably have no idea that a extremely huge assortment of coffee is a quite tiny taste. I think it is because of this fact that the majority of people simply have a single-size wide array. What's vital is that you are capable to find the distinction that various flavor combinations make.

Typica is one of the world’s most well-known coffee wide arrays. Along with a credibility and reputation for quality and an great quantity of top quality new fruit and vegetables, coffee outlets like this one have their area in past history’’’. I locate that there are actually several styles of coffee in the world. The amount one is delightful and tasty. Nevertheless, some mug of coffee has even more than only delightful and mouth watering elements. There are numerous tastes of coffee that are really powerful and healthy to consume. It can easily be traced back to the birth place of Arabica coffee, Ethiopia, and is integral to understanding the coffees we consume alcohol today. It's also responsible for the range of elements and coffees in our coffee. Bake coffee, if you are a Starbucks follower, for instance, is one of our preferences with the add-on of coconut butter to the scent of your cup. But there is an substitute to cooked coffee that has a more powerful, even more natural and delectable taste. Its sensitivity to insect and illness has helped make it a much less preferred choice; having said that, its high-quality mug account and capability to demand higher prices is something to be taken into consideration. Thus there you possess it – an economical cup made for the normal American. What's your take? Do you desire to spend half your coffee on it, or do you prefer to purchase extra packs for your mug, or both? If you determine to acquire one, look at our various other mug protection stories. Sign up with us as we discover the history of Typica, its features, and points to consider to create when picking it as a range to develop. When designing for Typica, we wished to make sure that each kind is provided along with its own one-of-a-kind function and is as a result adapted for a particular level of job and quality. The types selected in order to create inputting and composition very easy and intuitive have consistently happen with some one-of-a-kind obstacle. Lee este artículo en español Variedad de Café Típica: ¿Qué es y Por Qué es Tan Importante? ¿May y más cinco?¿ (Yas el áscar como, el mas févé) I want to provide you some relevant information concerning this restaurant due to an job interview we performed along with you on the topic of the Spanish language. Lee este artículo en español Variedad de Café Típica: ¿Qué es y Por Qué es Tan Importante? ¿May y más cinco?¿ (Yas el áscar como, el mas févé) I really want to offer you some details concerning this restaurant due to an meeting we carried out along with you on the target of the Spanish foreign language. Environment-friendly cherries on a Typica plant at a arm in El Salvador. More Details moved to New York from Panama, and when they were finally able to function it was house; the home was the house of an global chef called Mariela Lopez. Lopez's moms and dads came to see him when he was still working in New York, on his 2nd day of university. She relocated in eventually that year, and Lopez and his mom happened to see. Credit score: Aguila Coffee What Is Typica? When it comes to what created her famous, a new style was birthed. Aguila informed WSMV, "I thought that the typewriter was merely sort of a natural response in order to help make inputting and composition simpler and quicker. Typewriter job is so easy, simply hit and scroll.". While utilizing it to type in, Aguila noticed another benefit, her grandmother, Elvira Gomes, had noticed. Typica is one of the very most essential wide arrays of Arabica coffee. It will make a lot much better than you assume because unlike the common Arabica, a tiny number of fragrant florals increase on leading of the coffee grain, so when the aroma of smell controls the aroma, there's a great bargain of flavor, a excellent equilibrium between quality and flavour, and one that are going to assist you to keep your coffee at the finest wellness.

#Coffee beans

[shrimp-purgatory]

I finished Women With Attention Deficit Disorder by Sari Solden last night and want to share some of my thoughts:

Overall, it was an okay book. 2.5/5 stars, maybe? The tone was friendly without being condescending or falling into misinformation and the book covered relevant information to the intended audience (and did a decent job of politely explaining why dietary fixes aren't going to magically cure you).

The bad:

My main issue with it was how dated it was. It was written in 1995 and revised in 2005. While a lot of the technical information is still correct/relevant, it offers relationship advice that feels... old. Things have changed a lot in 15+ years since it was revised, and the whole "you don't have to do things Traditionally" advice feels extremely conservative at best. Maybe for older women ("older" as in 30+/not young adults) or those with very conservative families the advice is still relevant, but for a lot of people, I think it reads as extremely old-fashioned.

I also feel like it somewhat failed to cover sensory issues/social issues in much depth. Auditory processing disorder (and auditory processing as a symptom) was basically glossed over, as were things like food sensitivity. While some of the advice was decent (thinking about social withdrawal as an emotional bandaid that can send the wrong message), I think it failed to offer a lot of sympathy or advice for those struggling to find their "sensory limit" before they hit meltdown/shutdown.

Other oversights:

• Hyperfixation was barely mentioned.

• School age bullying is a pretty common phenomenon that never got mentioned.

• It mostly ignored the links with ASD (which I think was probably due to the year; the book was on the cutting edge of "oh yeah women actually can have ADHD" and I can't imagine "woman can have autism" and the understanding of level 1/Asperger's syndrome in women was deeply developed at that point either).

• RSD wasn't mentioned (it may not have been a "known thing" at the time and I don't know how formally documented it is even now).

It is also mostly directed towards post-education women with late diagnosis in non-technical fields. As somebody going into engineering, it was a little disappointing to see 0 examples or heed given to folks who go into STEM; it was mostly fashion/parenting/teaching/arts/business. Is it the end of the world? No. It was just a mild irk.

My last complaint was the lack of consideration towards queerness or even gender nonconformity. It being 2005 and already oriented towards women in their 30s, I can see why there weren't examples of w/w relationships or discussion of trans/nonbinary individuals (even as a little introduction side note--"this book is written assume you're a cis female, but it contains information to all afab individuals, regardless of their identification"), but it feels worth it to note that anyways. It definitely felt weird in some places.

The good:

I think the book offered some strong frameworks for dealing with late diagnosis, reasonable (mildly dated but not egregiously so) advice on medication in terms of what's out there, how it works, and options, and on dual/secondary diagnoses. It also does a solid job of explaining executive functions and how ADHD is less about not having attention and more about not having the ability to control it. Also did a decent job talking about brain fog/SCT and the hypoactive side of things.

The main reason I read it was for the discussion on the menstrual cycle and how it affects functioning. That section was brief but useful enough (I'm guessing no further research existed at the time), and I will probably try and write up a mini lit review if I find any decent articles furthering the information. Long story short: after ovulation, peaking during your period, you may notice your functioning levels are worse, and may want to consider dosing your medication differently, planning for this disruption, using birth control, or some combination of the above.

#I want to write a book but I am in no way qualified to do so lol #actually adhd #adhd

[uvobreakmylegs]

Prey

got a request for a monster!Uvo as well as a request for an Uvo fic where he chases the reader. hope it’s cool that I combined the two of them

@ramwrites​ and I are in agreement that werewolf is the best type of monster for Uvogin

werewolf!Uvogin

Warnings: death, blood, gore, body horror, little bit of smut, graphic depictions of violence, mentions of cannibalism, attempted suicide, implied kidnapping, reader does not have a good time

Thin rays of sun that were able to slip past the branches of the trees hit Uvo's back as he went about his work, placing another upright log on the now considerably worn down tree stump and bringing his axe down upon it, slicing the wood in two and tossing the pieces into the pile to his right before he grabbed another unchopped piece from the pile to the left. Based off of the sun's position in the sky, it was only a bit after midday. Uvogin had been going at this for a while now, his sweat staining the white tank he wore.

Though the sweating wasn't because the work was in any way debilitating. Any other day of the month Uvogin would've been able to chop the same amount and not even break a sweat.

No, today was different because of what was happening tonight: a full moon.

Even though the night was still a long ways off, Uvo could already feel the very beginnings of his transformation shuddering through him. Faint, but still noticable. Unfortunately, with the ever present fact that nightfall wouldn't come for hours yet, there was little he could to other than to keep himself busy and distract himself lest the anticipation kill him. So he continued to chopping the logs, even though the amount he had cut already was bordering on excessive.

In the midst of his distraction, his ears perked up when he heard the faint rumblings of a car engine. His senses of smell and hearing were always pretty good even when it wasn't close to a full moon, but those senses were ten times as sharp now, and he could clearly hear as the car came in closer and closer.

Whoever they were, they wouldn't be the first people to have approached him today. Already he'd been asked two different times for directions to the nearby campgrounds, the first time by an elderly couple who were likely well into retirement, and the second by a group of individuals who had also gotten lost. The woman from that group who went up to him told him more information than he'd needed to know, informing him of how theirs was a company sanctioned team-building retreat. She had a piece of gum in her mouth and smacked it loudly as she talked, and because of his sensitive hearing, the sound of it became distressing to the point that Uvo had to keep himself from clawing his ears off.

Everyone in that group deserved to die because of that woman alone.

Uvogin didn't stop what he was doing even when he heard the car drive past and then suddenly brake, just continuing as he was while he heard the sounds of a car door opening and someone stepping out. Words were being spoken; what was being said exactly he couldn't say, but based off of previous experience it was easy enough to guess.

The car door slammed shut and the engine rumbled again as the car began to drive further down the dirt road. It'd be back in a little bit – over that way was a dead end. But Uvogin quickly switched his focus to the footsteps he heard walking through the unmarked pathway and headed towards him.

“Excuse me?”

He heard your voice call out to him, and Uvo finally turned to face you. Upon making eye contact with him, you smiled and held up a map as you called out again “sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if you could help out with some directions? We're looking for the Visca lake campgrounds, but I think we've been going around in circles.”

You didn't come any closer when you said that, though it seemed to be more out of a desire to not intrude on his space as opposed to being nervous about the axe he was holding. There was a hopeful look in your eye, though you also seemed ready to apologize for bugging him if he instead told you to fuck off.

Already he knew he liked you much better than the bitch from earlier.

“Sure,” he replied.

Uvo set the axe down and walked towards you, his hand outstretched so you could hand him your map. You smiled and handed him the map without any hesitation, coming up beside him as he unfolded it and scanned the paper so he could give you an idea of what direction you needed to go. The height difference between the two of you meant that he needed to lean down a bit as he pointed out to you the appropriate road that would get you to your destination.

“The road to the campgrounds is here,” he told you.

Despite the way he had tried to accommodate the height difference, you still needed to stand on your toes to see where he was pointing. Your arm came up briefly before you swiftly pulled it back. Like you'd been tempted to place your hand on his forearm to better balance yourself but stopped yourself since the two of you were complete strangers. Though Uvo wouldn't have minded too much if you had done so. Taking advantage of the way you were right next to him, he inhaled, memorizing your scent for later.

Uvo then moved his finger towards the left as he continued “we're around this area, so you'll want to drive back the way you came and take the first right you see. Then you'll want to take another right to get onto the campground road. As long as you don't fuck up turning, you should get to the lake in about ten minutes. Maybe less.”

“Ah, okay!” you responded, taking back your map as you looked over the route he'd pointed out to you. As you were desperate to make sure you got his directions right so you wouldn't need to be in the embarrassing situation of messing up his instructions and needing to go back to him for further clarification, you didn't notice the way he was looking you over or how he inhaled more of your scent.

Your hair smelled of something flowery, some kind of hair product you must have used that morning before you drove out here. Your clothing also had a rather soapy smell, though it wasn't as noticeable as the product in your hair. Beneath all of that, he was able to take in your natural scent that was free of any products or chemicals, as well as... Perfume? An odd choice for a camping trip, he thought. Then another smell hit him, one that surrounded you but you were definitely not the source of.

Oh.

It was the unmistakable scent of another man.

The perfume made more sense now. You'd said 'we' earlier as well, so chances were you'd come here with a boyfriend for a romantic weekend getaway and his smell has just gotten all over you after spending several hours cooped up in a car with him.

Not terribly displeasing. A boyfriend being in the picture might make things a bit more interesting.

“Okay, I think I've got it,” you said, snapping him out of his thoughts, “sorry if I took up too much of your time.”

“No problem,” he answered, “I get a lotta people asking for directions, so I'm used to it.”

“Really? That sounds like it gets annoying. Why don't they put up signs or something?” you asked.

“They do,” Uvo said, “but they usually get taken down by vandals.”

More like self-righteous teenagers who'd found out the truth about him and couldn't stand the fact that the elders of the nearby town allowed Uvogin to do as he pleased and thought they could thwart his killing sprees by taking down the signs leading to the lake, like they could save any innocent vacationers if they weren't able to find the campgrounds. Those kids had yet to learn that if they managed to deprive Uvo of his prey, he'd be forced to go to their own town and hunt there, maybe snatch up one of them or their families. The older folk in charge of the town understood that, and they'd decided that it was better to let the occasional out of town stranger be his prey than risk him coming in and picking off whatever stragglers he could find in their community.

People vacationing in the wilderness died all the time, after all.

“Vandals?” you asked. There was the slightest bit of concern in your voice, and when your eyes went slightly wide as you looked at him, he couldn't help but muse at how cute you looked like that.

“Just dumb kids,” he explained, “there's a small town a little ways back and I reckon they don't have much to do around there.”

“Ah, I see. Do you think we'll need to worry about them bothering us?”

“Nah, they wouldn't do anything,” Uvo said, “besides, they know that I'm out here today, and they know better than to bug me.”

You laughed a bit at that, any deeper meaning to his words going over your head.

“I can't blame them. If I was one of them I'd be too scared to do anything to get on your bad side.”

Uvogin just smiled.

A voice then called at the top of the path, and you both looked to see a dark-haired man around your age standing there. He called out what Uvo assumed was your name, and you waved to him, calling out a short “coming!” before you turned back to Uvogin.

“Thank you again for your help. I really appreciate it,” you told him.

“Once again, not a problem. Hope you two have a good time.”

You smiled and nodded at him, and then began to walk back over to your boyfriend. But before you had the chance to bid him goodbye, Uvogin spoke again.

“You wanna know something that's not in any visitor's guides?” he asked.

“Huh?”

He grinned at your slightly confused expression as he explained “if you go down to the southern side of the lake, there are these really beautiful cliffs in the forest. A lot of clearings that show a pretty good view of the sky, too. And it's a full moon tonight; if you want to make some memories, you should check it out when it gets dark.”

Clearly intrigued, you turned back to face him, asking “really? Why isn't that part advertised?”

“The locals want to keep parts of the lake to themselves,” he said, “but I think it's something that you might appreciate.”

“You sure you won't get in trouble for telling me?”

“Not if you don't say anything,” said Uvo, raising an eyebrow as he smirked.

“Ah, gotcha,” you said. Behind you, your boyfriend was starting to look a bit suspicious, and his lips soon formed a frown. You weren't paying him any mind at the moment.

“What's your name?” you asked.

“Uvogin.”

You held out your hand as you introduced yourself, and he humored you by giving you a handshake.

“Thank you so much for everything,” you said, “maybe we'll see you again while we're here.”

“Maybe.”

With that, you finally turned and made your way to your awaiting boyfriend, who gave Uvo one last narrowed glance before he turned his attention to you as you eagerly pulled your map back out and began to tell him the directions that had been given to you. Your boyfriend only gave one more glance towards Uvogin before focusing his full attention on you, looking over the map with you before the two of you made your way back to the car. He seemed rather boring, Uvo thought to himself. Yet before you made it back in, you stepped up and kissed your boyfriend on the cheek. Uvo saw the way your boyfriend stiffened and the blush that reached his ears as he sat down in the driver's seat to escape your random but sweet action. You laughed as you entered through the passenger's side, and Uvo kept an eye on the two of you until he saw your small, light blue car pull away and drive down the road.

When the two of you were gone, Uvo went back to chopping wood, picking the axe back up and slicing the log into two even pieces. He didn't expect that anyone else would come blundering into the forest before evening, but if they did, he wouldn't pay them much mind. If he killed every single person who came in to enjoy the lake he would quickly lose that particular food source and then need to find another area to hunt.

No, the only ones that were on the table tonight were the company group and you and your boyfriend – he wouldn't bother hunting down that elderly couple as it wouldn't be interesting in the slightest to go after them. The larger group had a good number of people in it, so there would be no need to seek out anyone else. Honestly he shouldn't even bother with the two of you, but Uvo thought of you again, thinking over every action you had taken, from the way you had approached him to how you held out your hand when you introduced yourself.

The little bit of affection you had offered to your boyfriend also came to mind but he brushed that thought away. It was unimportant, he told himself.

No, he shouldn't bother with the two of you, but he wanted to see how your naive little expression might change when you saw him next, after the moonlight had transformed him, and hear how you might scream and cry as he hunted you down.

He grinned at the thought, and when his axe came down again, it sliced the log and the stump beneath it clean through.

The true beginnings of his change had started hours ago when the sun sank past the horizon and the moon slowly rose in the night sky. Just little things, like the way his teeth began to shift in his mouth, or how the black tips of his claws were starting to show beneath his fingernails, slowly pushing up beneath the nails and trying to force themselves out so he could have an easier time tearing apart whatever unfortunate victim happened to be closest to him.

His skin was starting to shift a bit in places as well as it began to detach from the muscle beneath, and he was hit with an overwhelming urge to run outside and allow his transformation to complete so he could go wild as he always did on a full moon night.

But he waited, forcing himself to focus on the fire that was burning before him, to wait until it had gone out completely before he stepped foot out of his cabin.

It had turned into something of a ritual for him; when he had started it he could no longer remember. It was purely ceremonial, and at the heart of it he knew that it did nothing to add to his hunt, but after being alone in the woods for so long he supposed he was entitled to a bit of superstition. And at this point, it would have felt wrong to do it any other way. When the fire went out, the moon would be at the highest point in the sky, and when he left the dark cabin and bared himself to the moonlight, his werewolf form would tear through and he would track down the victims he had met earlier in the day, the ones whose scents he had remembered after he'd chosen them for his prey. Didn't matter much in what order he got them, just whatever scent he came across first.

Although maybe tonight it mattered a little bit. If he could manage it, Uvogin wanted you to be the last one to die tonight. After the group from the company retreat and your bland looking boyfriend, he'd hoped he could then have you for last. Something about that made him feel like that would be the only appropriate ending to the night.

But that all depended if he could manage to remember that after he'd transformed.

The light of the fire was growing more dim, and he was having a harder time sitting still, his entire body itching to burst through the cabin door and let the moonlight take him.

Not yet, he told himself.

But soon.

Those black claws were showing a bit more now, and at least two of his fingernails had popped off, blood coating his fingertips as his hands clenched onto the skin of his legs. That same skin shifted once more as he did so, and after a few moments he felt something trickling down his thigh, and when he glanced down he could see in the faint glimmer of firelight the hole in his skin that he'd torn open, and the dark fur beneath the human flesh that was still covered and the blood dripping down his leg.

Not yet not yet not yet

A few more agonizing minutes later that had seemed endless in his mind, and finally the fire he'd begun earlier was reduced to a smoulder, the flames dying out and the wood glowing red as the fire reached the end of its life.

Now

No sooner had he thought that Uvogin had thrown open the cabin door and ran out into the woods that surrounded him, bare as he gazed up at the full moon as he allowed himself the moment that he'd been holding off on.

There were multiple changes simultaneously and Uvogin was barely able to comprehend all of what was happening to him because of it. There was always a pain that accompanied his transformation, and while it was a pain that he was used to at this point, it was pain nonetheless.

At the sight of the moon his green eyes turned yellow and his pupils narrowed into slits, while the bones in his body began to shift and grow. It started with his spine, extending and pushing out through his skin and almost causing a ripple effect through his whole body. His bones were snapping and stretching beneath his skin, growing as his muscles were expanding and making him into even more of a giant than he already was. Claws on his hands and feet tore through the flesh that surrounded them as those parts of him extended, the skin ripping open and allowing more of the fur that was hidden underneath to show through.

When he felt the flesh around his shoulders stretch out in an attempt to accommodate the transformation he sped up the process by reaching up and tearing it away with his own fingers, the black claws easily ripping in and pulling the skin away like a latex glove. Soon the skin that had been on his arms sat around him in pieces on the grass and he began the same process with his chest and legs, tearing away his flesh in messy strips and allowing the fur that had formed on his body to be exposed, matted with blood and looking almost black in the light of the moon.

His skull went through the same process as the rest of his body, and he felt his face crack into several different pieces before the bones began to remold themselves and pushed outward, taking the shape of a wolf's muzzle while his teeth extended and shifted to fit properly in his newly formed mouth. When his ears began twisting and pushing upwards into sharp points was when he tore at the skin on his face, pulling it off as he had done with the rest and throwing it to the forest floor.

When the last of his human flesh had been removed, his transformation was complete. The man who had stepped out of that cabin was gone and replaced with a large, bipedal wolf whose yellow eyes dilated as he looked up once more to the moon. Lifting his head up, he arched his back as he let out a howl loud enough that echoed through the woods and across the surface of the lake. Those that heard it in the nearby town quietly whispered their prayers to whichever gods they worshiped while those who were visiting the lake's campsite merely marveled at the sound.

If Uvo was in a different mindset he might have thought of you in that moment, and what you might be thinking when you heard him. If you had any clue of the danger you were in.

But in this moment, there was no thought of you or even saving you for last as he had tried to so hard to ingrain into himself. There was no thought of doing this in any order or trying to end the night correctly as he had mused about earlier.

The only thing going through Uvogin's mind was the need to kill.

As luck would have it, he'd managed to kill the ones from that company first.

There had been more of them. More that were wandering around their campsite, more that were talking amongst themselves, and in general just making more noise that, combined with their scents from earlier, allowed him to find them first.

There were actually more of them in that group than he'd anticipated, and as he killed off the last woman in the group, gum falling from her mouth as he twisted her head completely around. Uvo then looked around at the carnage he'd left in his wake. It was hard to tell with the way they were all in pieces now, but the number of people group had easily been in the double digits. That would probably cause a bit of trouble, as it would be hard to try and cover this up. This would easily make the news. Annoying, as Uvo would need to make sure to lay low for a bit, and it could possibly lower the amount of potential victims in the area when the next full moon came.

But it had still been worth it.

Uvogin felt more like himself again now that the murderous urges had been sated. Able to think a bit more clearly, more rationally. And he was able to remember you and what he'd hoped for early on. He could imagine it: your scared expression as you watched him kill your boyfriend before he slaughtered you like the rest, your screams cutting short as he bit into the skin of your neck and tore out your throat.

Now that his hunger was taken care of, he left the campsite of the now-dead group. Right now all he wanted was to find you and your boyfriend.

Remembering what he had told you of the southern side of the lake, he took a gamble as he headed off in that direction, making his way through the woods at speeds much faster than a regular human would be capable of. He stopped when he felt the wind blowing again, and lifted his nose in the air, trying to see if he catch anything.

….. There

It was faint. Very faint, but he managed to catch a familiar human scent.

He turned and headed off in your direction. It was too far away to get your exact location, but it was enough that he could get at least an idea of where you were.

Continuing towards the south side of the lake, he stayed close to the shoreline until he found your little blue car from earlier parked close to the lake, a tent set up not too far off from it. Your scent became a bit more clear as he came closer, and yet when stopped to scan the area, his eyes looking for the slightest bit of movement and his ears straining to hear any bit of noise, he couldn't find you.

A bit annoying, but based off of the way the two of you had left things, you should still be in the area. It was just a matter of hunting you down.

Uvo stalked about the campsite, just in case he missed something while also puncturing two of the tires on your car and cutting off that potential escape route. Satisfied that neither of you were on the site or next to the water, he walked back into the woods, following after the little bits of that fragrance he'd latched onto.

As he walked, he thought to himself with some amusement that you'd actually taken up his suggestion. Uvogin had found that most people didn't bother, either because they were too dedicated to the plans they'd made before arriving or because they didn't trust that the landscape was as beautiful as he'd made it out to be. In fairness, it mostly all looked the same to him, but there had just been something about that particular bit of campground that made him enjoy hunting there more. So it was even more perfect that the two of you had ended up there. Most likely you were just doing what you felt like and didn't feel like adhering to any particular schedule.

His ears perked up as he heard a low voice in the distance. Not yours. Probably your boyfriend, then. Focusing himself so he could move silently, Uvogin weaved through the trees, his eyes searching for you while he listened for more noise from either of you.

When he heard your voice next, he had definitely gotten closer. Your voice had sounded odd, though. Almost breathless.

He found the two of you in a larger clearing that stood beneath one of the cliffs he had spoken of. You were laying with your back on the grass, dressed in a swimsuit with only a shirt over it. Your boyfriend was in a similar state with the moonlight falling onto his bare back, and it looked like both of you were a bit wet, some drops of water still on your skin and hair still damp. So the two of you had gone swimming before you wandered over to this area to mess around.

You said something to him before the two of you shared a kiss, and you moaned into it when he slipped his hand under your shirt to grab at your chest.

It certainly wasn't the first time Uvo had come across a pair of lovers in the woods. Such encounters usually ended with one or both betraying the other, as several times in the past one would push the other into Uvo's path in an attempt to save themselves after having a passionate make-out session only moments before.

Uvogin stepped out from the treeline and waited for one of you to notice him. You let out another moan, and to him it sounded like it was slightly exaggerated. Was your boyfriend not that good? Not too surprising, based off of Uvo's impression of him.

If Uvo had been the man on top of you, he was certain he could do much better.

….. Where did that come from?

Uvo didn't get much time to wonder about that as he heard you let out a sharp gasp, and when his eyes refocused on you, he saw that you were looking right at him. Your eyes were wide and your skin paled as you stiffened, your hands grasping at your boyfriend's arms.

“What's wrong?” your boyfriend asked when he noticed your reaction.

Keeping your eyes on Uvogin, you answered him in a small whisper “there's something over there.”

Your boyfriend turned his head to where you were looking, and he went stiff as well when he saw Uvogin's werewolf form.

It was quiet in that clearing, free of any noises from any woodland animals or even the insects, as anything that was in that immediate area sensed the danger and were desperate to keep silent. No, the only sound Uvo could hear was your breathing that became more panicked as you struggled to keep it under control and the way your boyfriend tried to shush you while he broke out into a cold sweat. You two were both under the impression to stay still and not make any sudden movements for fear of provoking him.

Then your boyfriend whispered your name.

“When I move,” he breathed out, “I want you to run back to the car and get out of here. Even if I'm not with you, you have to take the car and leave.”

As he spoke, your boyfriend slowly moved his hand over to a pack beside you that Uvo hadn't noticed at first. Still, Uvo grinned. He thought he could take him on?

You tried to protest but your boyfriend wasn't hearing it, only repeating his instructions to you and trying to make you promise that you would do as he said. You didn't want to; that was clear, but when you looked back over to Uvogin's form outside the treeline, you shuddered once more and agreed to leave with a short nod.

Uvogin waited for the boyfriend to make his move. He looked just as terrified as you were, but he was clearly trying to be brave for your sake, and his resolve seemed to steel when he got a hold of whatever he had been searching for in the pack.

“Now!”

Your boyfriend yelled as he shot up and charged at Uvo. For the first time since seeing him, Uvogin felt mildly impressed with your boyfriend; he'd been genuine about wanting to save you over himself. Not like he wouldn't still die for it as he was still incredibly weak, but there was something to be said about the willingness he had to face down a beast like Uvo for your sake.

You must be something special to make a man go that far for you.

The thing your boyfriend had pulled out turned out to be a can of bear spray as well as a medium-sized hunting knife. Uvo managed to doge the stream that had been aimed at him easily on account of how badly the hand that held it had been shaking. The boyfriend ran back a bit, unwilling to get too close to Uvogin even with the knife. He tried to aim it again, but Uvo used his claws to slice at him, slashing upwards as he aimed for his throat.

Somehow, he missed the boyfriend's throat and only managed to hit the side of his face, opening up his cheek and taking off his ear. The boyfriend cried out at that, one hand going up to his bleeding cheek while still trying to incapacitate Uvo with the bear spray. But with the way he stumbled about, it was almost too easy for Uvogin to grab him by his face and hurl him into the trunk of a nearby tree. He hit headfirst, and there was an audible cracking sound that came from the impact. Uvogin didn't even bother to watch the way his body hit the ground, experience telling him that he was definitely dead.

Uvogin was much more interested in you.

You were still in the clearing. At first you had done as your boyfriend had told you and bolted the second he yelled, running back to your campsite. But you stopped and turned back when you heard him cry out when Uvo had slashed at him. You wanted to help him but you also knew there was nothing you could do, and so you were left standing in the clearing, your whole body shaking as you struggled with the decision to stay or leave your boyfriend behind.

It was cute how loyal you were to him.

And loyalty certainly wasn't a bad quality.

When you saw your boyfriend die you froze, tears streaming down your face as you looked between the now dead man and the thing that had murdered him. You were clearly in a panic, your legs trembling as your brain struggled to figure out what to do, where to go from here. Certainly you had to be aware that you'd lost any chance of getting away like you'd been told to do, right?

Apparently not, as when Uvogin stepped forward you bolted, running back towards the camp. Yet Uvo found a sense of relief with that, that you wouldn't just sit there and let him kill you and end it so early.

For whatever reason, that last thought displeased him.

But he brushed that away as he chased after you only moments later, not bothering to be quiet with his movements and instead being as loud as possible, breaking apart any low-hanging branches in his wake as he howled into the night air once again.

You had only made it a little ways past the car when he emerged from the forest and lunged towards you. It seemed like you were trying to get away on foot given the damage to the car. Already there was a scent of blood in your wake, as the soles of your feet had already been cut up on the sharp debris of the forest floor.

You turned towards him just in time to see him raising his clawed hand over his head before he sliced it downwards. Through what must have been some bit of luck, you stumbled backwards at that moment and all he managed to do was give you a flesh wound.

You hit the surface of the gravel road hard, crying out in pain at the force of your fall as well as the cuts that were on your arm, your hand immediately grasping at your wound as you desperately tried to use your legs to get yourself off of the ground.

Then he was on top of you.

He opened his jaws wide; you saw as he did so, and attempted to crawl out from under him.

He snapped his jaws shut on your throat.

And you went stiff.

It was quiet for a few moments.

And then a small rush of air escaped from your mouth as you let out a breath you had been holding.

Almost.

He had almost killed you in that moment.

The pointed tips of his teeth were pressing lightly into your skin, not quite hard enough to make you bleed, but that would change if you shifted your neck just slightly.

Why had he stopped?

He stayed there, hunched over you, his arms caging you in while his maw was around your throat. He felt the pulse in your neck beating wildly, almost causing vibrations against his teeth. You had stopped struggling, your legs still while you continued to clutch at your wounded arm, the only noises coming from you now being your uneven breathing.

What was he doing?

His yellow eye glanced over to your face, and he found that you weren't even looking at him. You were gazing in the direction of the night sky, where the light of the moon shown down on you like a spotlight, but it didn't even seem like you were even looking at that. Your eyes were wide as you breathed hard, and Uvo had to wonder if you were currently seeing your life flash before your eyes. That perhaps your mind had accepted that this was the end of your life and was remembering as much as you could before Uvogin would sink in his teeth and sever those major arteries in your neck.

Were you satisfied with all that you had accomplished up to this point, or were you disappointed and felt that you should have done more?

Moments passed like that, his hulking form engulfing yours with no movement from either of you. He took in a deep breath, and he once again caught some of the flowery smell of your shampoo, though it had largely faded by now, and you smelled much more like the woods after the hours you had spent there. More like pine and tree leaves, and the fresh water of the lake, and....

Uvogin let out a short grunt that made you whimper and you clenched your eyes shut as you believed this to be the end. You had no clue that Uvo could smell your arousal coming from between your legs. It had come from the way you'd been fooling around with your boyfriend earlier – there was no way you could have been turned on by this.

Uvo thought again of what he had seen when he stumbled upon the two of you, and that odd thought that had interjected at one point. You had been on his mind almost all day, and he thought it was because he wanted to kill you. And now you were beneath him and the moment couldn't have been more right, and yet now that was the last thing he wanted to do.

It hit him then. The different urge he'd had about you since he had seen you earlier in the day, since he had seen the way you treated your boyfriend; the way you had kissed that man had stuck out in his mind. Hardly any different than any other couple he had seen who were too big on PDA, yet combined with the way you had first come up to him, had smiled and thanked him, and introduced yourself so willingly while also asking for his name had made all of the difference in the world.

His days in the woods were lonely. It was something Uvo was well aware of but had thought he could handle, and he had done so for several years now without issue. But now that he knew you, with your actions and your touch and even the sweet scent of your arousal that he wished more and more that he had been the cause of, another second of being alone sounded more like torture.

Still, the biggest reason he had stayed on his own for so long was that he had accepted that there would be few in this world who would be alright with spending the rest of their lives with a man-eating monster. And any that he may have wanted to keep alive despite that probably wouldn't have been worth the trouble. Keeping someone else with him would also mean he would need to put in the effort to keep them alive, and if he had them unwillingly he'd need to make sure they wouldn't be able to get away, either by restraining them or locking them up.

He watched you, watched the way your face stayed scrunched up as you waited for him to finish it. He wanted you, but were you worth the trouble?

When Uvogin pulled off of your neck and sat back up, you meekly opened your eyes in confusion and trying to anticipate what horrible thing he would do to you next. You yelped when he grabbed you by the back of your shirt as he stood, pulling you up to your feet and setting you in front of him. With one hand on your shoulder and one on your hip, he turned you so you were facing away from him, making sure you were steady on your feet.

He leaned down so his maw was right next to your ear, and in a voice that sounded more animal than human, he growled out a single word:

“Run.”

With that he pushed you forward. You stumbled a bit, your brain still processing what he had said as you barely took a few steps away from him. Then, like a lightning bolt had hit you, you finally seemed to understand as you snapped back and made a beeline for the woods. Your bare feet were loud on the cluttered forest floor, and he occasionally heard little gasps and soft whimpers of pain when you cut your foot open further on a rock or a sharp branch.

Uvo waited, wanting to give you a good head start before he began to chase after you. It would be easy to track you, especially with how much you were bleeding now, but he shuddered with barely contained excitement, eager to chase you down but knowing that he needed to give you a decent head start or else it would be over too quickly.

If you proved yourself worthy of keeping alive, then he'd take you back to his cabin.

And he really hoped you wouldn't let him down.

…. But then something felt wrong.

Uvogin's eyes narrowed as he sensed that you were still within the immediate area and not moving away from him as he had expected. The direction you had gone in was the same one the both of you had come from; the patch of woods and the clearing where he'd found you in the pathway. There wasn't anything there that you could have fallen over or gotten stuck on, so why....

A new thought occurred to him, and Uvo growled lowly to himself as he hoped he wouldn't see what he felt he might when he found you next.

You were back in that clearing, sitting next to your boyfriend's fallen body. Your body was facing the direction Uvo had arrived from, both of your hands in front of you as looked down at your now former lover. There were tears rolling down your cheeks as you sat there.

A wave of disgust hit Uvogin as he found he was correct and was thoroughly disappointed with your actions. He'd given you a chance to get away and you'd wasted it by sitting around crying. Clearly he had given you too much credit.

You heard him as he began to walk towards you, and he noted the way your hands slipped beneath your boyfriend's slightly upturned body, your head still downcast.

He stood across from you, letting out a huff that made you flinch. But still, you didn't move from that spot.

As he opened his jaws your head shot up and you lifted your hands from beneath the body.

Just as you did so, something sprayed into his nose, eyes and his open mouth. Something that stung and made him gag. Fuck it burned, and Uvogin let out a howl of pain as he clutched at his face.

The bear spray-!

Something sharp then dug into the flesh beneath his collarbone, and the pain from the bitter spray was accompanied by the sensation of a knife blade stabbing into him.

With another howl as he was now blinded, he swiped a hand in your general direction and heard you yelp as he simultaneously clawed your shoulder and forced you to the ground. With his hearing now being his greatest sense, he managed to pick up the clatter the bear spray can made as the force of his blow made you drop it, and he moved one of his feet to stomp at it, crushing it and making it useless.

Uvo roared again as he swung about wildly, trying to catch you once more, but you managed to avoid his attacks and made your way into the woods again as he heard your labored breathing and footsteps growing fainter and fainter.

He clutched at his face as he tried to make himself calm down, trying to will away the pain and regain his sense of sight and smell.

…. Not bad.

Even with the rage he had felt in the moment, he found himself relieved, almost happy that you had caught him off-guard. You had gone as far as to use your boyfriend's body as a prop, to make him think that you were too broken up about his death so he would lower his guard. Had you been a bit taller, you could have done a decent amount of damage if you'd managed to stab the knife into his throat.

The knife was still in him, he realized, and after regaining a little bit of his sight in his left eye, he easily pulled it out and threw it across the way.

Now you had no weapons, but he was also at a disadvantage as his eyes were still watering and he could no longer smell you as clearly, the harsh chemicals of the spray making him internally wince every time he breathed through his nose. If he wanted to catch you, he would need to rely almost entirely on his hearing to search for you.

The sounds you were making were quite distant now, but he grinned to himself and stayed there a while longer, letting you get further away.

The direction you were going had no civilization, there was only forest for miles, and he was happy to let you get yourself more and more lost if it meant that his hunt would continue.

By the time dawn was nearing, signaled by the sickly pale color the sky had turned to, Uvogin had managed to chase you further into the wilderness, up through the trees and near the edge of a cliff face. Throughout the night there had been times where you had slowed or stopped completely as you tried to regain your strength, taking advantage of your smaller size and slipping into places that he couldn't easily get to. You also had several brief spurts of energy where you had sped up suddenly, more determined than ever to get away from him while you threw various stones and branches back towards him, though you never tried anything else as bold as you had with your trick from earlier as you didn't allow him to get that close again.

But as you stumbled to the edge of the cliff and looked at the steep drop before you, it was clear to him that your fight was gone. He knew it even before you fell to your knees on the sharp rock. The chase had ended, and just in time, as daylight would be here soon, and when that came he would revert back to his human form.

It had been one of the most memorable hunts he'd had in years, and even though your will had been broken in the process, by now he was certain that he wanted to keep you. To have a little partner in his solitary life, someone to keep his bed warm and wait for him to return home in the evenings. The scenario was nice to think about, and he especially liked the idea of you cuddling up to him during the colder months of the year, trying to keep yourself warm with his body heat to fight the chilly air that would sneak inside. Maybe eventually he'd get you to give him sweet tokens of affection like you'd given to your boyfriend, perhaps a kiss on the cheek before he went out to hunt.

And maybe every once in a while, if you were still insistent on putting up a fight, Uvo might let you out during a full moon and make you think you had a chance to escape, just so he could hunt you down and drag you back to his little home in the woods.

The thought of it gave him chills, and he wondered how long he would need to wait before he could let you out.

You were lightly swaying in place as you looked to the ground below while Uvo was consumed in the thoughts he had about you. He assumed that you were just waiting for him to finish it – your willpower was dried up, and there was no way you would try to run around him or do anything as stupid as try to climb down the cliff face.

He had no clue where your thoughts had taken you in that moment.

Realization shot through him when he saw your shoulders sag and your body began to fall forward over the edge.

Uvo rushed forward and grabbed you by your shoulder before you fell off and he threw you back, a good distance further and far rougher than he had been intending, as you wailed weakly when you hit the ground.

If you were willing to kill yourself to escape him, he'd need to wait some time before letting you run about the woods again.

By now, you were covered in dirt and blood and whatever else had stuck to you from the forest while you had run from him. Your skin was covered in cuts that he and the forest had given you and it would likely be some time before you would be able to properly walk again based off of the state of your feet. When he approached you once more, you clenched your eyes shut again. By now you were past the point of tears and just waited for him to finish you off.

You jolted at the feeling of his fur brushing against your skin when straddled you once more, but just as before, the killing blow you were expecting never came. You opened one eye, and just as you did so, the first rays of the sun shone over the landscape beyond and hit Uvogin.

You watched in silent horror as the fur that covered him caught on fire and began to burn. He was briefly consumed by the flames before they vanished into puffs of smoke. His bones were snapping again, breaking into pieces and retracting back into their normal size while his muscles and skin rippled and shrunk back down, tightening around his fingers as the claws also retracted and vanished beneath the skin. As his wolf face broke apart and reformed, there was a look of shock in your eyes as you saw the beast on top of you become more and more human. And that shock soon turned into a realization when you found that you recognized the man who was on top of you.

His transformation back to his human form was over in a matter of seconds, and when it was over and his green eyes looked back down at you, you stuttered as you tried to find your voice.

“U-Uvogin?” you asked weakly.

He grinned, pleased that you had remembered his name.

Without another word, Uvo leaned down over you so he could begin the process of properly claiming you as his.

#reader insert #uvo x reader #Uvogin #hxh uvogin #yandere #yandere hxh #yandere x reader #yandere hunter x hunter #yandere uvogin #monster #uvogin x reader

[yanderes-of-inkwell]

Maybe some root pack headcanons, if you don’t mind? 💚

The Root Pack - General Headcanons

Note: Nope, I don’t mind! I love these veggie lads and I’m happy to write for them. Word Count: 1.3k Warnings: Delusional mindsets, implied manipulation, implied murder, obsessive behaviour, overprotective behaviour, possessive behaviour, violence.

♤ Since first setting up their little farm on Isle One, the Root Pack have generally been regarded as a very kind and hard-working bunch. Though a bit withdrawn at times, they’re actually quite welcoming to anyone who cares to visit them. Sal, while definitely the most distant of the three, is undeniably a sweetheart beneath his aloof exterior. Ollie, meanwhile, is much more shy and sensitive, being both easy to make cry and awkward around strangers. And Chauncey, in addition to being a laid-back jokester, is also the most open to interacting with folks outside of their little tight-knit group.

♡ As you can imagine, it’d be rather difficult for them to find a darling that they all like. Having such distinct personalities means that each member of the Root Pack wants something different in a potential partner. Sal wants a person who’s hard-working and honest, and who values fairness above all else. Ollie is quite drawn to patience and compassion, two traits he believes his darling must have, as well as a willingness to provide him comfort should he need it. And Chauncey has always been fond of people who possess a great deal of wit and humour, those who can keep up with him but don’t take themselves too seriously.

♧ By all means, finding a darling that’s perfect for them would be near impossible. And yet, they somehow managed to, despite all odds. Chauncey’s likely the one who meets them first, being that he’s the most social of the group. Whether he’s busy running errands or simply out on a stroll, his darling will instantly catch his attention. Though their initial conversation is brief, Chauncey immediately feels a connection with them. Being both relaxed and easy to talk to certainly aided them in capturing his interest, and it left him thinking about them hours after they’d parted ways.

◇ Upon returning home, he’s quite eager to recall his encounter with them to Sal and Ollie. The two are certainly intrigued, to say the least, wondering just what kind of person managed to capture his attention so quickly and easily. Sal, being the voice of reason that he is, expresses his happiness for Chauncey, but is also quick to remind him that they are still a stranger and that he should approach the situation more carefully. Ollie, meanwhile, is much more enthusiastic than the former and even encourages him to bring them around the farm if given the chance.

♤ Even after taking both sides into consideration, and despite the more logical part of his mind urging him against it, Ollie’s enthusiasm is what ultimately wins him over. And because of this, Chauncey is more than happy to invite his darling over when the two eventually cross paths again. Though he tries to maintain his usual laid-back attitude, their presence does fluster him a tad, and he becomes almost giddy at the prospect of getting to spend time with them.

♡ Whether he takes them to the farm himself or they find their way there a few days later, it doesn’t matter; he’ll be over the moon about having them over. As for Sal and Ollie, the two will be hesitant to greet them. Sal due to his caution around strangers, and Ollie due to his social anxiety. Nevertheless, their darling manages to leave a good first impression on them, much to Chauncey’s delight. Ollie in particular becomes quite smitten with them after the ice is broken, being drawn in by how sweet they are towards him, and how patient and understanding they are when it comes to his anxiety.

♧ Sal, on the other hand, takes a bit longer to charm than the other two. He’s naturally wary around strangers and as a result, is rather closed off from his darling in the beginning. Though that’s not to say he doesn’t admire them from afar. In fact, he’s quite star-struck by just how charismatic they are, and the fact that they had both Ollie and Chauncey wrapped around their finger within minutes of meeting them. It takes some time but eventually, Sal comes to fall for them too, which becomes inevitable once he sees just how honest and diligent they are, in addition to being kind and patient.

◇ After the Root Pack’s darling manages to enrapture the three, they soon come to realise their shared feelings for them. It was bound to happen, given their inability to keep secrets from each other, especially due to their shared history and time spent together. Once the truth comes out, the three come together to discuss their rather peculiar situation. As none of them are particularly selfish, the decision to simply share their darling comes easily to them. They are brothers-in-arms, after all, and know they can trust each other with their darling.

♤ Once this decision has been made, the three will gradually start to welcome their darling more and more into their lives. Inviting them to visit more often, asking them for help on the farm, even leaving their home to visit them occasionally; all of these become regular occurrences for them, all so they can become closer to their darling and eventually lure them into their trap. Though, they don’t quite see it that way. From their point of view, they’re simply taking the steps necessary to protect their darling, whom they believe is far too naïve to realise just how dangerous these Isles truly are.

♡ And just as they had hoped, their darling is none the wiser about the severity of the situation they’ve found themselves in. Sure, their partners may be a bit overprotective at times, but it’s only because they mean well, right? Surely their beloved boyfriends would never harbour any twisted feelings towards them, especially not one as lethal as obsession. Regardless of how they try to justify their boyfriends’ behaviour, the Root Pack gladly play along with whatever excuse their darling comes up with for them.

♧ As for outsiders, the trio become much colder towards the other Isle residents once they have their darling in their grasp. Those who once considered them friends are now turned away every time they try to visit, being told that they simply don’t have time to entertain guests. Eventually, people learn to keep their distance. While the Root Pack are not known for being scary or intimidating, it’s common knowledge that the three are a rather strong bunch, and are perfectly capable of holding their own in a fight.

◇ Should anyone come to cross a line, they’re most likely to have to deal with Chauncey. Though Sal and Ollie are not weak by any means, they generally prefer to keep outsiders away by simply not engaging with them. If they just ignore them, they reason, eventually they’ll take the hint and leave. Chauncey, on the other hand, has no problem with confronting anyone he believes has bad intentions. Hell, even those with good intentions are turned away, as neither he nor the others like sharing their darling with anyone outside their group.

♤ If a confrontation ever escalates into a full-blown fight, Sal will be quick to join him. He may not enjoy confronting people but that doesn’t mean he won’t, especially when it concerns his darling. While the other two deal with the problem, Ollie will be nearly glued to his darling’s side, making sure their attention is never on Sal or Chauncey. The last thing they want is to upset their darling, so Ollie is sure to keep them away from the potentially bloody fight in order to avoid just that.

♡ All in all, the Root Pack try to keep their darling as closed off from the world as possible. Not only does it keep them safe, but it also ensures that no one else can possibly steal them away. They are more than happy to provide them with a comfortable, quiet life on their little farm, where the dangers of the world can never reach them. And as for those who try to disturb their peaceful lives, well... Their corpses will be put to good use as fertiliser.

#cw yandere #cuphead #yandere cuphead #root pack #yandere root pack #root pack x reader #sal spudder #yandere sal spudder #sal spudder x reader #ollie bulb #yandere ollie bulb #ollie bulb x reader #chauncey chantenay #yandere chauncey chantenay #chauncey chantenay x reader #headcanons #💚 anon

[cacodaemonia]

I wanted to talk about this with someone and you seemed like a safe person to approach, so I’m gonna confess/vent a little to you I guess if that’s okay 🥺

I’m fairly new to the Star Wars fandom and when I got into the clone wars and specifically the clones in general, naturally I started reading fanfic and looking at art. I noticed some people shipped the clones together and I thought nothing of it. Based on their interactions on screen I thought “yeah i can see why people interpreted it that way.” Especially ships like Jesse/Kix and Boil/Waxer. To the point now that in my mind they are just naturally together, I can’t imagine them not. Even if it’s not necessarily romantic, but I could get behind the romantic ship side as well. I like any version of the relationships between the clones, whether it’s more familial/brotherly or romantic.

Imagine my surprise, then, to find out that some people think it’s problematic or equal to in*est? I never saw it that way, and I still don’t. They’re not actually siblings. They’re clones, yeah, but they’re still… different people? But because I’m new to the fandom, I’m afraid to talk about it anywhere or with anyone for fear of being judged or shunned. Especially after that blacklist nonsense that recently went down. And it sucks too because I want to make friends and enjoy the fandom space, but I feel like I can’t to the full extent I want to for fear of judgement or hate. I’ve dealt enough with that in other fandoms, I’d rather just avoid it if I can in this new one, which means keeping quiet. But I hate that, too, because then I’m forced to hide this thing I really enjoy, which makes it feel shameful. Like, I recently really got into Rex/Fives and read/reread every fic that exists in the tag, but I feel like I can’t talk about it with anyone without being judged :/ they’re not even real people, I don’t see why some get so up in arms about it

I'm happy you feel like I'm a safe person! <3

Oh, same! I literally didn't think about it, then I was like, okay well some people associate clone/clone ships with actual familial relationships, so I guess I should be considerate of their sensitivity. I never saw it that way, because you absolutely cannot have millions of siblings, but then the antis got pushy so I said fuck it and went all in. XD

Anyway, as you said, some of the clone characters have such great dynamics with each other, even in the very small amount of screen time they get, so it's completely natural to ship them just like you'd ship any other characters.

They’re clones, yeah, but they’re still… different people?

Yes! Tbh (and I'm not directing this at people wo are just squicked out by clone/clone ships while being mature enough to ship and let ship <3), I find it kind of... unsettling when some people suggest that, just because the clones all look roughly the same, that automatically means they are a monolith and can't have a variety of relationships with each other.

It makes me wonder if these folks are completely failing to grasp one of the main themes of TCW: even if you look the same, you're not the same person inside / you don't have to be special to be special??

But yeah, it sucks that this group of very vocal, nasty people is trying to ruin things for others who just want to enjoy fandom in completely harmless, yet slightly different ways. I make liberal use of the block button and content/tag filters so I never even see their BS, but the sane people in the fandom shouldn't have to do that just to not get harassed.

Haha, what we need is a Chill People List! It would probably be quite extensive. :)

I wish I could help somehow, but other than painting a bigger target on my back since idgaf, I feel like all I can do is try to be a voice of reason. <3

Also, Fives/Rex is very cute and is definitely growing on me. :D

Take care! <3

#how do i tag this #uhhh #clone ship #fandom wank #antis #fandom police #ship and let ship #just be nice people #it's not hard #long post #purity culture

[cancerjupiter]

🌱earth moons🌱

Those with earthy Moons react in a very grounded, matter-of-fact way. The reaction may be so self-contained in those with Taurus or Capricorn Moon, in fact, that others may wonder if there has been any reaction. Those with Virgo Moon, on the other hand, react rather quickly, mentally, and sometimes nervously to any stimulus in a way obvious to everyone, even if the person is trying to contain his or her emotional reaction. Just like the earth itself, those with an Earth Moon have a crust over their emotional reactions; and they prefer to present a certain form to the public rather than to reveal their vulnerabilities.

taurus moon

The Moon is extraordinarily happy in the comfortable, stable sign of Taurus, for the emotions are steady and the person has little self-doubt. Those with the Moon in Taurus are not easily perturbed, even by powerful attacks or shocking events that would strongly affect others. They are in fact amazingly resilient, bouncing back from any defeat, disappointment, or trauma. Perfect examples are politicians Bill Clinton and Joe Biden, and celebrities Demi Lovato and Lindsay Lohan; who, despite unmerciful attacks, still manage to have their shit together and maintain at least some degree of popularity.

The poise with which Taurus Moon people face life’s demands and unpredictability is remarkable, and they therefore have a steadying influence on others, who appreciatively value their reliability. Note that I said “reliability,” not necessarily readiness! This sign is known for being the slowest in the zodiac, moving actively only when they are good and ready and insisting on their own pace in everything they do in life. Their inner contentment and resistance to change can thus make them frustrating to deal with if their considerable stubbornness causes them to dig in their heels to resist what you want. The other side of the coin is their remarkable persistence when they are focused on attaining a certain goal.

Those with Taurus Moon are attuned to the rhythms of nature and the earth, and this gives them their particular pace of life and much of their strength. They are notably physical and sensual, and have a great need for the “pleasures of life.” And they insist on taking the time to enjoy them. This unique attunement leads to a trust in earthly life that enables them to accept others with few demands and to take life as it comes. They are pleased with life (generally) and rather pleased with themselves. This can of course result in smugness, conceited self-satisfaction, and self-indulgent laziness. As Grant Lewi wrote, the key to improving oneself for Taurus Moon is to “turn self-satisfaction into active self-confidence”.

Emotionally, those with this Moon sign are not at all cold, but neither do they readily reveal their feelings. They are good listeners and are usually warmly responsive and solidly supportive, but not gushingly effusive. They really prefer not to allow anything to affect them. Some comments from questionnaire responses add additional perspectives to this lunar type:

1. “Seems very positive, giving men good relationships with women. It also appears to give talent in crafts such as cooking and other home arts.”

2. “ … sensual, heightened sense of material/physical aesthetics (e.g., clothing, home, colors, etc.), wonderful sense of humor, stubborn, and sometimes impervious to what’s going on beneath the surface of things.”

People with the Moon in Taurus like to be touched, especially to be hugged. Also, I’ve noticed a certain resistance to change. This resistance ranges (in different people) between a reluctance to accept the moods of another and a reluctance to allow any out-of-the-ordinary spontaneity to enter their life (usually hate surprises).

virgo moon

Those with Virgo Moon need a sense of order in their own minds and in the environment to feel comfortable and secure. This leads to their instinctive analytical reaction to all life experience, sorting their perceptions and thoughts into categories and discriminating between them according to their personal principles or prejudices. This need for order also motivates their obsession with neatness and cleanliness. They likewise feel more secure by making definite improvements in their environment, in their scientific, artistic, or intellectual pursuits, or—something not always appreciated with this sign—in other people. In fact, as one woman wrote in a questionnaire, “Sometimes they can be busybodies, putting others’ lives in order with advice—usually not so tactful. They’re so busy organizing friends’ lives that they forget about their own”. This “workaholic” tendency can also manifest as a broad range of criticism from afar directed even at total strangers who, evidently, just don’t measure up to the Virgo level of perfection.

Being helpful makes them feel better about themselves and aids them in overcoming their habitual self-doubt and sense of personal imperfection. In fact, “perfectionism” is a keyword for Virgo, and their unavoidable awareness of their own imperfections leads often to excessive self-consciousness, sometimes of a type so severe as to render them unable to use their genuine gifts with any confidence. Their tendency to notice the imperfections of others, and to voice those observations far too often, frequently makes the other person feel uncomfortably and unproductively self-conscious. Those with Virgo Moon would do better to heed their deep need to serve and to help others or improve things in the outer world. By doing so, they can eventually gain a sense of having improved themselves—at least in the modest way they will allow themselves to acknowledge. Virgo is the most modest sign in the zodiac—one of the few, in fact. Virgo Moon people can seem shy and reserved.

Habitually nervous types with a tendency to worry, Virgo Moon people often find their personal tranquility and self-validation in work and compulsive “busyness.” Work also provides an escape from the unpleasant emotions or depressing feelings of guilt or worthlessness that so often afflict those with this Moon position. But, because emotions interfere with productivity, as Donna Cunningham points out in Moon Signs, they are conveniently put aside or suppressed in the routine of daily life. Hence, Virgo Moons are among the few people who love all kinds of petty, boring activities — even housework. A friend with this placement even admitted to dreaming about being a mother/grandmother, so she could do chores and serve her family all day (of course, she’s also a Cancer Rising).

Doubt and skepticism pervade their mode of thinking and reacting, and of course there is always something to criticize in any person, place, thing, or concept. The infinitely small is always available as a target! This constant mental tension and the sensitivity of their nervous system, and their hyper-attunement to hygiene and purity, make these folks fascinated by and eager for involvement in the areas of nutrition, biological sciences, natural therapies, the healing arts, and/or the medical professions. This natural affinity also, however, bends them toward hypochondria, at its worst, or at least to a sensitive digestive and/or intestinal system. The quality of the food they eat is of utmost importance, since it directly affects their nerves and mental state, not just their digestion.

Their talent for detailed work is without equal (except for those with certain other planets in Virgo), and they often get great satisfaction from employing their natural craftsmanship in the practical or fine arts. Because their mind can always find something wrong with any idea or plan, indecision often afflicts those with this Moon placement. Moral indecision as well is often observed, as their perfectionist and puritanical tendencies battle with their more practical or sensual needs.

capricorn moon

Those with Capricorn Moon, as is also the case when other major planets or the Ascendant are in Capricorn, seem unnaturally old and serious when they are young, but they can lighten up as they grow older. In their youth, they are unusually capable, disciplined, and conservative, taking the well-trodden path to their goals of worldly achievement or to follow a vocation. Their real confidence is late-blooming, as their sense of inner security develops over time and they feel that their age at least, if not their accomplishments, has earned them some respect they have always craved. Capricorn Moon people eventually learn to relax somewhat and to trust life and other people to a greater extent. The aura of melancholy that those with Capricorn attunement so often carry around with them can also slowly dissipate over time, sometimes helped by a more and more adventurous—but dry—sense of humor.

The fluctuating, responsive, emotional Moon is not at all naturally comfortable in a sign that is often rigid and distant, and prides itself on not revealing any sign of vulnerability or personal need. People with Capricorn Moon have instinctive reactions to life that are characterized by self-control and caution, and sometimes by a defensiveness or negativity that is almost shocking. They feel that they need to manipulate and control the world (and their feelings) in order to attain the power, authority, and recognition that they deeply desire. In fact, they are most secure within themselves when their identity is confirmed by a social role, title, specific duty, or mantle of authority. Even at an early age, Capricorn Moon people are comfortable assuming responsibility and feel perfectly at home in the role of provider, protector, or organizer. They are most relaxed and truly themselves when they are carrying some weight, or when others have to depend on them! Very hardworking, these folks share with Virgo first place on the list of people who absolutely love to work, which often ultimately results in professional success. They may not always be fun, but they will often get the job done.

Perhaps the most oppressive thing about this group occurs in those who become too obsessed with being recognized as important and having authority; sometimes, there is a persistent “one-upmanship” that pervades their personal and professional lives. The constant drive to be “on top” can cripple their capacity for any human intimacy and eliciting automatic distrust from others. As psychologist-astrologer Glenn Perry, Ph.D., wrote,

“The tight controlled responses often lead to loneliness and despair as it prevents the individual from flowing and responding to the changing mood of others. Moon in Capricorn nurtures by taking charge and giving orders. This dry mechanical approach to feelings is not sympathetic and tends to imply that the other is incompetent. Unable to respond directly to emotional needs, Moon in Capricorn gives the impression of being callous, hardened and unaffected by the tender side of life. (Aspects magazine, Fall 1981)”

If the emotional suppression and denial become chronically extreme and rigid, the result can be a person who others may respect but not love. However, from another view (from the inside, so to speak) of this Moon sign’s emotional nature, I quote here from an interview with a Capricorn Moon young woman who characterized herself to me as having “a seriousness about the emotional life, an interest in getting down to bare bones, an impatience with small talk, and a need to get to the core emotionally.” She continues:

“All Capricorn Moons I know (there have been a lot) have a certain gravity to them, an ability to take the emotional life seriously. The women especially are almost never giggly or flirty — we’re too serious to flirt much. The women are kind of ‘masculine’ I guess, sort of businesslike in their manner (men too actually… it’s not a placement I ever see that is friends with everyone and instantly, openly affectionate). I think ‘a few serious, long-term friendships’ sums up all the Capricorn Moons I know.”

A questionnaire reply from another woman also emphasized that women with this capable, ambitious orientation are liable to feel “ambivalent about their sexual identity,” although they have strong physical needs, and that women with Capricorn Moon have “a great need for appreciation to develop their self-worth”. Two other questionnaires confirmed the self-disclosure quoted above regarding the practical agenda underlying emotional commitments. The words they used were “cool in affections and looks out for self” and “very calculating—not necessarily bad—just a lot of planning, no spur-of-the-moment reactions.” Another quite thorough questionnaire reply from an experienced practitioner of astrology included the following:

“this Moon placement shows marked proficiency in handling the self in the material world, or at least a lot of concern over and attunement to material affairs. They are very shrewd in taking care of their financial needs. Very often they are involved in some secure structure, like working for the government, etc. They like a secure financial position. For all, they take things very seriously; they approach many things cautiously. This is also a very sexual placement in laid-back ways.”

In conclusion, the Capricorn demeanor of slowness, caution, and hesitation should never mislead you. They may be conservative in most attitudes, but they are actually very progressive and results-oriented in action. They just don’t like to make mistakes.

#astrology #moon signs #taurus moon #virgo moon #capricorn moon #moon in taurus #moon in virgo #moon in capricorn #cap is longer bc that's my sign therefore i understand it better

[aktiophis]

On The Moon

Okay so I’ve talked a bit about the planetary hours before, and I’m pretty sure I mentioned the Moon, but I sort of want to talk a bit more about the sort of considerations you would give to the Moon in magic. I’m going to try and keep it as much as I can to considerations you can make without knowing how to draw up and read an astrological chart.

So the planetary hours are really one of the simplest ways to time magic. They’re very accessible and for that reason very widely used. That being said, the day and hour of Mars in itself is not going to be as powerful as say, Mars in Aries culminating at the midheaven with the moon waxing to full trine it or whatever. But without going into an in depth look at an astrological chart there are some considerations you can make to add something more to how you time spells or talismans.

The Moon is very important in traditional forms of astrology and astrological magic. It is the closest heavenly sphere, and the influences of the other planets and stars filter down onto the Earth through the Moon. In horary astrology, the Moon is also often treated as an additional significator for the querent. It’s a big deal. Even in folk magic traditions as seen in the Book of Gold (or maybe the long lost friend, or both, I don’t recall), the sign and phase of the moon play a big role in the timing of magic. Even Farmer’s Almanac’s make use of the Moon. So, if you’re to consider only one extra thing, it should be the Moon.

The Moon also happens to be the fastest moving planet, so in terms of accessibility you aren’t going to have to wait 2.5 years for it to change sign like you might with Saturn. Unless something is really time sensitive, you can push a ritual back a day so the Moon changes sign.

I’m going to start with the easiest things to identify and incorporate, and then work the way up to the more borderline chart interpretation stuff.

Phase

The Moon’s phase is just, so easy to work into things. You can really just go out and check what it’s looking like if you absolutely have no other way of ascertaining it by google somehow. Anyone who has picked up a mass market paperback on modern witchcraft/whatever will have read a copy-paste section on how waxing is for increase and waning for decrease. And honestly yeah, that’s about the gist. Most books on Western Magic will prefer a waxing Moon, simply because quite a lot of magic seeks to increase a thing. But you can work to decrease say debt, or illness, or whatever. So just by making your Jupiter talisman in a waxing Moon, that’s a step up.

One thing I will say is at least be aware of when the moon is combust (pretty much the day before and after a new moon, where the moon isn’t visible). In general, for astrological magic, no see planet=no good. There are certainly things this can be good for, and I’ve seen folk magic that specifically calls for this time period, but in terms of a planetary talisman or something of that kind, combustion is generally something to avoid unless there are other circumstances in play, like the planet is in a sign it rules, or Cazimi (which is a very close conjunction with the sun), which is conversely very good, unlike literally every other point of a solar conjunction. 

Sign

You can also consider what sign the Moon is in when selecting a time. Continuing with a Jupiter Talisman, the Moon being in Pisces or Sagittarius works well, because those signs are ruled by Jupiter. That sounds a bit wishy washy, but it’s based on the concept of reception. If the Moon is in a planet’s Sign, that planet is receiving the moon as a guest when the Moon is in said Sign. This in turn gives us a link between the planet and the Moon, which is, to reinforce what I’ve said, the body responsible for focusing the planetary force onto the Earth and something traditional astrologer’s seem to spend a lot of time fussing about. Jupiter receives the Moon by exaltation in Cancer, which could be another one for that example, especially since the moon rules Cancer as well.

Aspect

The Moon being in an appropriate sign is great, but more often what you find books looking for is the Moon aspecting the planet, specifically by a trine or sextile. That would require a chart to be drawn up, and I’m sort of trying to keep this to things that don’t require the ability to draw up a chart or read a wheel chart. So, no degree based aspects. But, if you know where the planet is, so say Jupiter is in Aquarius as of writing, you might pick a day when you know the moon is waxing in Taurus, which is a sign based sextile from Aquarius (a sextile is 60 degrees, so 2 signs. Trine is 120 degrees, which is the same as moving 4 signs. A square then is move three signs and an opposition 6, for completeness). Extra brownie points because the moon exalts in Taurus. A degree based aspect is obviously preferable, but ignoring that, just googling what sign a planet is in and finding a day when the moon is in a sign either 2 or 4 signs onwards or previous is as good as you’ll get.

Beyond this point, I’m mainly mentioning things for completeness, because If the moon is a bit slow but Jupiter is really strong and everything else is good, just do it anyway. Plus these are starting to enter territory where you should really have drawn up a chart and they’re extra considerations to help find the best date for something big.

Lunar Mansion

There are 28 Lunar mansions for the just under 28 days of the Moon’s sidereal period. Christopher Warnock has a good book covering them, but they’re another consideration you can use, and there are a whole class of talismans specifically using the Lunar Mansions for different goals. Naturally if you’re making a Lunar mansion Talisman this will be much higher up the list. I think Lunarium has a widget that shows the current Lunar Mansion.

Speed

So this one I don’t know how you would evaluate  without at least an ephemeris, but there’s probably a calculator somewhere that can tell you what speed the Moon is going at. The idea behind this one is easy enough too: Moon go more fast, magic go more fast. The speed of the planet’s generally is quite important to some astrologers, and William Lilly seems to consider a fast planet a bit more dignified and a slow one a bit more debilitated. 

Void of Course

Lunarium also has a little widget for this, but you should just make the damned chart and get over it at this point. There are a few different definitions of Void of Course which I’ve seen and I’m sure there are people with personal views on what does and doesn’t count, but personally I would consider the moon void of course if it is not currently applying to an aspect with a planet or Lunar Node. There are some that say “if it does not apply within the next 30 degrees” or “before the end of the sign” and a few others, but honestly just pick one and work with it and see what happens. To be honest I think the importance of VoC is overstated, but the idea is if the Moon isn’t applying to an aspect, it’ll be harder to achieve what you want to because there isn’t anywhere for the Moon to work on because it isn’t forming a new connection.

Anyway to tie it all together, without doing too much legwork you can decide you want to do a Jupiter talisman, and it just so happens that on a Thursday the moon is waxing in Pisces and you happen to know that Jupiter is in cancer (it isn’t but just pretend it is). Without having to read a natal chart, you have an election in the correct day and hour, with the Moon increasing it’s light, and the planet you’re working with is strongly placed, (mutually) receiving the moon, and making a good aspect with the Moon. That is quite a step up, and frankly beyond that you’ll want to start learning how to read a chart because this still doesn’t address like, Saturn and Mars. Like honestly by the time you’re addressing void of course you should really know how to read a chart.

#I have a lot of useless shit in my head #in terms of like quick magic tho #friday when the moon is waxing in libra will probably get the job done for stuff that isnt a Big Thing #anyway I'm sure there's something huge I'm forgetting #magic #magick